Episode 2

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0:00:02 > 0:00:04# Nana was a suffragette Almost the last alive

0:00:04 > 0:00:09# Nana was a suffragette, over 95

0:00:09 > 0:00:14# She sang Votes for women is just the beginning

0:00:14 > 0:00:19# You haven't seen anything yet

0:00:19 > 0:00:21# Oh, Nana was a suffragette. #

0:00:21 > 0:00:23BIRDSONG

0:00:27 > 0:00:28Ssh!

0:00:31 > 0:00:32A-h-h-hem!

0:00:32 > 0:00:34Gwen?

0:00:34 > 0:00:38Yes, just putting out my home-made fairy cakes, Margaret.

0:00:50 > 0:00:52No!

0:00:54 > 0:00:56A-h-h-h-hem!

0:00:57 > 0:01:00- Gwen?- Yes, just coming. Er...

0:01:01 > 0:01:05Yes, um, about these, um, placards, Gwen.

0:01:05 > 0:01:08Um, what was it exactly you said to Mr Jones from the woodyard?

0:01:08 > 0:01:11Well, I said six by three.

0:01:11 > 0:01:15Six by three with the poles, or six by three with the poles?

0:01:15 > 0:01:17I'm not sure, Margaret. I'm not sure.

0:01:17 > 0:01:20I was just very conscious not to take up too much of his time

0:01:20 > 0:01:22as he's made them for us for nothing.

0:01:22 > 0:01:24I'm not sure I made a hand gesture.

0:01:24 > 0:01:27- Where were you?- Well, I was in the line at the butcher's.

0:01:27 > 0:01:29Mr Hill, the butcher, had asked me

0:01:29 > 0:01:31how large I wanted the beef brisket

0:01:31 > 0:01:33for the annual St Augustine's church dinner,

0:01:33 > 0:01:36and Mr Jones from the woodyard had just asked me

0:01:36 > 0:01:39what dimensions I wanted our plackets to be.

0:01:39 > 0:01:42And I looked at Mr Jones and... Oh, yes, I did gesture.

0:01:42 > 0:01:46I gestured to Mr Hill, six by three.

0:01:46 > 0:01:48Right. Yes, I see.

0:01:51 > 0:01:53- They're wrong, aren't they? - No, no, Gwen. They're not wrong.

0:01:53 > 0:01:56Oh, Margaret, I'm so sorry! I'm exhausted.

0:01:56 > 0:01:59Mother was up all night with her pleurisy.

0:01:59 > 0:02:01She's finally agreed to take up smoking,

0:02:01 > 0:02:03which the doctor recommended.

0:02:04 > 0:02:07But it just seems to keep her wide awake.

0:02:08 > 0:02:12Good grief! Are you putting together a paddle steamer?

0:02:12 > 0:02:15- Oh, they are wrong! - No, no, no, no, they're not.

0:02:15 > 0:02:18They're perfect for our purpose.

0:02:18 > 0:02:20What, a trip down the Mississippi?

0:02:20 > 0:02:21We are putting Banbury

0:02:21 > 0:02:24Intricate Craft Circle Politely Requests Women's Suffrage

0:02:24 > 0:02:25firmly on the map, Mr Millar.

0:02:25 > 0:02:28We're carrying them on a suffrage march to the post office.

0:02:28 > 0:02:32They are wide like this so we can fit more writing on them.

0:02:32 > 0:02:36You could fit the Testament Old and New on those.

0:02:36 > 0:02:38I'm here! I'm here!

0:02:38 > 0:02:40I wasn't going to come tonight

0:02:40 > 0:02:43as I've been extremely busy with the annual ball bearings gala.

0:02:43 > 0:02:47It wasn't a gala, Helen, it was a dinner for seven.

0:02:47 > 0:02:48Thank you, Mother.

0:02:48 > 0:02:51When one has spent one's life pursuing pleasure for its own sake,

0:02:51 > 0:02:54I'm sure it's hard to imagine how complex the responsibilities

0:02:54 > 0:02:57of dutiful married life are.

0:02:57 > 0:02:59Yes, I'm sure as I lie on my deathbed,

0:02:59 > 0:03:01I will cast my mind's eye back

0:03:01 > 0:03:04over all the table arrangements I never made.

0:03:04 > 0:03:06Not long now.

0:03:09 > 0:03:10- Hello, Emily. - Don't speak to Emily.

0:03:10 > 0:03:12She's being punished for indulging

0:03:12 > 0:03:15in the most deplorable, unnatural act.

0:03:15 > 0:03:17I was listening to Bizet.

0:03:17 > 0:03:19Music for fallen women.

0:03:19 > 0:03:21What's this? Are you building a windmill?

0:03:21 > 0:03:25No, these are placards for our suffrage protest.

0:03:25 > 0:03:27We're marching to the post office today.

0:03:27 > 0:03:31Oh. I see you're still hellbent on attempting to captain

0:03:31 > 0:03:33this rudderless ship of fools

0:03:33 > 0:03:36upon the topsy-turvy seas of a motherless society.

0:03:36 > 0:03:39If you mean campaigning for women's votes, then yes.

0:03:39 > 0:03:42I've come today to tell you that I shan't be joining you.

0:03:42 > 0:03:44- Oh.- No matter how hard you try to persuade me.

0:03:44 > 0:03:47- Yes.- I'm not a suffragette. - Right.- And I never will be.

0:03:47 > 0:03:49- No.- Goodbye.- Goodbye.

0:03:55 > 0:03:58Well, I'm sure we'd all love it if you'd stay.

0:03:58 > 0:04:00Yes, yes, please, Helen. Please stay.

0:04:02 > 0:04:04Oh, well, very well, if you insist, I will.

0:04:04 > 0:04:05But I will not participate,

0:04:05 > 0:04:09I will merely observe and criticise...constructively.

0:04:09 > 0:04:12How very selfless of you. Thank you, Helen.

0:04:12 > 0:04:15- Right, so shall we get on with... - Not at all.

0:04:15 > 0:04:17..painting these placards?

0:04:17 > 0:04:20Right, well, shall I talk you through the various bits and bobs?

0:04:20 > 0:04:23- Bits and bobs?- The brushes and paints to paint the signs.

0:04:23 > 0:04:25It's a complicated business

0:04:25 > 0:04:29and it can't be approached with any degree of slapdash.

0:04:29 > 0:04:30There's art in it.

0:04:30 > 0:04:33You can't dip brushes like you're dipping toffee apples.

0:04:33 > 0:04:37I know that. I've recently read Ruskin's Placards of Venice.

0:04:37 > 0:04:38I think I know what I'm doing.

0:04:38 > 0:04:41Right, well, just remember to thin the paint with the turps.

0:04:41 > 0:04:44Turps? Ruskin didn't mention turps.

0:04:44 > 0:04:48Hang on. Why don't I do one? You've got enough placards.

0:04:48 > 0:04:51Now, this is a one-inch horsehair Merriweather.

0:04:51 > 0:04:54The second most expensive you can buy.

0:04:54 > 0:04:58Dip it in lightly. Just a little. You don't want to clog it.

0:04:58 > 0:05:00Now, what do you want me to write?

0:05:00 > 0:05:03Oh, er...down with men?

0:05:03 > 0:05:05Down with men. Right-ho.

0:05:05 > 0:05:07So...lightly as you go.

0:05:07 > 0:05:11Paint it right out till the brush is empty and then dip again.

0:05:11 > 0:05:15Oh, right. Had Michelangelo been a caretaker...

0:05:15 > 0:05:17Yes?

0:05:17 > 0:05:19Well, had he been a caretaker, he would have...

0:05:19 > 0:05:20I don't understand.

0:05:20 > 0:05:23Well, I'm just saying if he had been a caretaker,

0:05:23 > 0:05:25he would have paid a lot of attention to his brushes.

0:05:25 > 0:05:27Oh! Goodness.

0:05:27 > 0:05:29I wasn't... It was just a passing... Please, I...

0:05:31 > 0:05:33I'm a bit worried about these plackets, Margaret.

0:05:33 > 0:05:37- I'm not sure if we'll be able to lift them up high.- Really?

0:05:37 > 0:05:41Oh, yes. Um... No, I'm sure it'll be fine.

0:05:41 > 0:05:43I'm sure it'll be fine. Just...

0:05:46 > 0:05:48The gravity exerts a downward force

0:05:48 > 0:05:51and the floor exerts an upward force.

0:05:51 > 0:05:55And seeing as both forces are of equal magnitude

0:05:55 > 0:05:58and in opposite direction, they balance each other out.

0:05:58 > 0:06:01It's simply a case of just finding perfect equilibrium.

0:06:01 > 0:06:03Like this.

0:06:03 > 0:06:04Agh!

0:06:06 > 0:06:08Mr Millar?

0:06:09 > 0:06:12I think this is commonly known as falling at the first hurdle.

0:06:12 > 0:06:15Don't worry, Mrs Unwin. I have a solution.

0:06:15 > 0:06:17There are many ways to wrangle a pole.

0:06:17 > 0:06:20Indeed.

0:06:20 > 0:06:22I shall be back with technical reinforcements.

0:06:22 > 0:06:25Let's get on with painting the placards.

0:06:26 > 0:06:29Everyone, there's been a suffrage attack

0:06:29 > 0:06:32on the statue of Venus in the Banbury library.

0:06:32 > 0:06:33It's in the papers!

0:06:33 > 0:06:35Oh! Yes.

0:06:35 > 0:06:38"The attack is believed to have been carried out by suffragettes.

0:06:38 > 0:06:39"The suspects are still at large

0:06:39 > 0:06:42"and the police are calling for witnesses."

0:06:42 > 0:06:44- Do you want to see, Helen? - No, thank you.

0:06:44 > 0:06:47- They axed off her blubbery Mabels! - Goodness!

0:06:47 > 0:06:49And they painted out her flannery Ann!

0:06:49 > 0:06:51Why would they do such a thing?

0:06:51 > 0:06:53Because she's more than just her flannery Ann

0:06:53 > 0:06:55and her blubbery Mabels, Gwen!

0:06:55 > 0:06:57- Emily!- She's not an object.

0:06:57 > 0:07:00Well, she's a statue, which technically is an object.

0:07:00 > 0:07:06I've spent many GLORIOUS afternoons being an object of desire.

0:07:07 > 0:07:12When I worked as a governess for the Tutti Filangieri's in Napoli,

0:07:12 > 0:07:14the baron took a shine to me

0:07:14 > 0:07:19and we lay in his orchard discussing beauty and truth

0:07:19 > 0:07:22in the shade of his rare plums.

0:07:24 > 0:07:28Eva, what is a flannery Ann?

0:07:28 > 0:07:30Your, er... Your pompom la bute.

0:07:33 > 0:07:34Your Jennifer.

0:07:35 > 0:07:37Your Michaelmas Avenue.

0:07:37 > 0:07:40- Your vagina, Gwen!- Emily!

0:07:40 > 0:07:43Emily, there is a child present.

0:07:43 > 0:07:47Oh, are we doing placards? Oh, that's exciting!

0:07:47 > 0:07:49What can I write on mine, Margaret?

0:07:49 > 0:07:50Oh, um...

0:07:50 > 0:07:54taxation without representation is tyranny?

0:07:54 > 0:07:55All right.

0:07:57 > 0:08:00Do we have to write slogans, or can we just do patterns?

0:08:00 > 0:08:03We're a protest group, Gwen, not a children's nursery!

0:08:03 > 0:08:05Yes, but I don't see why we can't decorate them.

0:08:05 > 0:08:07Perhaps with some flowers in the corner.

0:08:07 > 0:08:10It is vital one studies one's canvas

0:08:10 > 0:08:12before one commits one's brush to it.

0:08:12 > 0:08:17When I studied painting under Jacopo Tonillieri in Roma,

0:08:17 > 0:08:21he would insist that I paint naked to add frisson to my brush.

0:08:24 > 0:08:27- Did it work?- It certainly did.

0:08:29 > 0:08:30Could you please spare us

0:08:30 > 0:08:34this catalogue of lecherous trysts, Mother?

0:08:34 > 0:08:35No!

0:08:36 > 0:08:39- Eva?- Yes, Gwen?

0:08:39 > 0:08:43You know your...well, your flannery Ann...?

0:08:43 > 0:08:45Yes, Gwen.

0:08:45 > 0:08:49Um...how does the... Well, does it join up?

0:08:49 > 0:08:52Is that... Is that how the kittens come out?

0:08:55 > 0:08:56Join up with what, Gwen?

0:08:56 > 0:08:59Well, does it join up with your soldier's mitten?

0:09:01 > 0:09:04- Your what?- Your rear guard.

0:09:04 > 0:09:05Your reserve constabulary.

0:09:05 > 0:09:07Oh! No.

0:09:07 > 0:09:10So, where do they come from?

0:09:10 > 0:09:12Oh, dear, sweet, innocent Gwen.

0:09:12 > 0:09:15They come from heaven.

0:09:16 > 0:09:18Through the fiery furnace of hell.

0:09:20 > 0:09:22Oh, no, I've ruined mine!

0:09:22 > 0:09:24Oh, I'm sure you haven't.

0:09:24 > 0:09:26Oh! No, look, everyone.

0:09:29 > 0:09:31Yes, she has.

0:09:31 > 0:09:32Yes. So I see. I see.

0:09:32 > 0:09:35Don't worry, Eva, everyone will know what you mean.

0:09:36 > 0:09:39I just didn't want anyone to know that I couldn't spell tyranny.

0:09:42 > 0:09:44Nor taxation.

0:09:44 > 0:09:45Nor representation.

0:09:47 > 0:09:49Nor is.

0:09:51 > 0:09:55Did you hear about Mrs Latham and the General's eldest son?

0:09:55 > 0:09:58- Oh, yes!- He's quite exquisite, though, is he not?

0:09:58 > 0:10:00She's no better than she should be.

0:10:00 > 0:10:02I heard they were at it in the kitchen

0:10:02 > 0:10:05and Fran the scullery maid walked in and found them.

0:10:05 > 0:10:07Apparently, he was in nothing but his boots.

0:10:07 > 0:10:10Troppo-troppo non-stoppo!

0:10:10 > 0:10:12Listen to yourselves!

0:10:12 > 0:10:15This is all just a little game for you, isn't it?

0:10:15 > 0:10:16You provincial gossips!

0:10:16 > 0:10:17Nothing but a petty distraction from

0:10:17 > 0:10:19the loveless servitude of your empty lives.

0:10:19 > 0:10:23Well, I hope I never end up like you.

0:10:23 > 0:10:24Oh, really, Emily?

0:10:24 > 0:10:27And how exactly do you think you will succeed

0:10:27 > 0:10:29where all these women have failed?

0:10:29 > 0:10:31It's perfectly obvious.

0:10:31 > 0:10:33I will simply choose never to fall in love.

0:10:33 > 0:10:35That is a woman's downfall.

0:10:35 > 0:10:38To succumb to the vanity and idiocy of romance!

0:10:38 > 0:10:40Sorry I'm late.

0:10:41 > 0:10:43Ladies. Miss Emily.

0:10:43 > 0:10:45Late for what?

0:10:45 > 0:10:46For the meeting.

0:10:46 > 0:10:48- This is our woman's suffrage meeting, Thomas.- Yes.

0:10:48 > 0:10:50- And you wish to join us? - Very much so.

0:10:50 > 0:10:52Absolutely!

0:10:52 > 0:10:56Welcome! Welcome! Piu sono meglio!

0:10:56 > 0:10:58I don't think my Charlie would like it

0:10:58 > 0:11:01if he knew I was in a group with other men.

0:11:01 > 0:11:04Please, please, do not think of me as a man.

0:11:04 > 0:11:07More as a pupil, one whom you can educate and illuminate

0:11:07 > 0:11:10as to the nature of your truthful, fearless, human hearts.

0:11:10 > 0:11:13You...

0:11:13 > 0:11:17you, you, you...you are unhappy cogs

0:11:17 > 0:11:19worn down by the grinding mechanics of male society.

0:11:19 > 0:11:21Cogs that would break free of the system

0:11:21 > 0:11:23and shatter the machine for ever!

0:11:23 > 0:11:25And though I am not a cog, I can act as a spanner.

0:11:27 > 0:11:29A spanner in the works of your oppression.

0:11:29 > 0:11:33Yours to... Hmm... Yours to use at will.

0:11:33 > 0:11:35A tool of protest. Thank you.

0:11:35 > 0:11:38Bravo! We have ourselves a spanner!

0:11:39 > 0:11:41What do you think? Shall we use this tool?

0:11:43 > 0:11:44Gwen, will there be enough cake?

0:11:44 > 0:11:47- Oh, yes, there's plenty of fairy cakes left.- Fairy cake, Thomas?

0:11:47 > 0:11:50Oh, thank you. Did you make these, Miss Rapier?

0:11:50 > 0:11:55Er...n... Yes, yes! Absolutely positively made those myself, yes.

0:12:01 > 0:12:03Very firm.

0:12:04 > 0:12:07Did you read about the attack on Venus?

0:12:07 > 0:12:09Yes. Isn't it wonderful?

0:12:09 > 0:12:12Oh, um, I could never consciously set about

0:12:12 > 0:12:16mutilating such a fine depiction of gentle beauty.

0:12:17 > 0:12:21Shouldn't this battle be waged with the pen rather than by the mallet?

0:12:21 > 0:12:24Well, I suppose the weight of one's weapons

0:12:24 > 0:12:27depends on the strength of one's wrists.

0:12:27 > 0:12:30This is the sort of thing we should be doing!

0:12:30 > 0:12:33Not picketing some stupid postbox.

0:12:33 > 0:12:35I chose the post office because of its proximity,

0:12:35 > 0:12:38but I'm perfectly open to any suggestions for suffrage action.

0:12:38 > 0:12:39Anyone?

0:12:41 > 0:12:42We could shout.

0:12:42 > 0:12:44Shout! Very good, Gwen.

0:12:44 > 0:12:47Shout. Anyone else?

0:12:47 > 0:12:48Arson!

0:12:48 > 0:12:51Arson. Yes, good.

0:12:51 > 0:12:53We could set fire to something.

0:12:56 > 0:12:58Again, good.

0:12:58 > 0:13:02Ride a horse bareback through the town completely naked

0:13:02 > 0:13:04with garlands in our hair.

0:13:04 > 0:13:07They do that sort of thing in Wiltshire all the time.

0:13:07 > 0:13:08We are not in Wiltshire!

0:13:08 > 0:13:11And we're not celebrating harvest festival. We're protesting!

0:13:11 > 0:13:14I think we should chain ourselves to something.

0:13:14 > 0:13:16Chains. Very good, very good!

0:13:16 > 0:13:19- Kidnap the Prime Minister! - Er...well, um...

0:13:19 > 0:13:20You will do no such thing!

0:13:20 > 0:13:24- Blow up Parliament!- Er...yes.

0:13:24 > 0:13:25I-I-I'm writing these down,

0:13:25 > 0:13:28but that doesn't necessarily mean I agree with them.

0:13:28 > 0:13:30- Kill the King!- Sit down, Emily!

0:13:30 > 0:13:33I'm not going to write that down because I don't think any of us

0:13:33 > 0:13:36want to face the death penalty, now, do we?

0:13:36 > 0:13:39I did rather think that preventing people from posting letters

0:13:39 > 0:13:41- does set just the right tone. - Thank you, Thomas.

0:13:41 > 0:13:43We're not doing that, are we, Margaret?

0:13:43 > 0:13:47What if it's an important letter? An order of wool, for example?

0:13:47 > 0:13:51Or a birthday card for a little kitten?

0:13:51 > 0:13:54A detailed letter of complaint to Banbury Council?

0:13:54 > 0:13:57A letter to a married man trapped in a loveless hell?

0:13:57 > 0:14:01Er, yes, well, we don't have to if no-one wants to.

0:14:01 > 0:14:03We could just go to the post office

0:14:03 > 0:14:05and stand near the postbox and shout.

0:14:05 > 0:14:07Well done, Gwen.

0:14:07 > 0:14:09We're supposed to be disturbing things, aren't we?

0:14:09 > 0:14:11If we're worried about inconveniencing people,

0:14:11 > 0:14:13surely we're missing the point.

0:14:13 > 0:14:15- You're right, Emily, you're right. - Ladies. Thomas?

0:14:15 > 0:14:17- Frank.- I knew we had something.

0:14:17 > 0:14:19Excellent! What have you brought us?

0:14:19 > 0:14:21They're from the marching band.

0:14:21 > 0:14:25You just hook on your drum, or in this case, pop up your placard.

0:14:25 > 0:14:28What a good idea. They're absolutely perfect, Frank.

0:14:28 > 0:14:32I don't think you step into it, Gwen. I think you put it over your head.

0:14:32 > 0:14:36No, no, no. You're doing it all wrong. Let me demonstrate.

0:14:36 > 0:14:37Are you suffragetting, Thomas?

0:14:37 > 0:14:39Yes, I am, as a matter of fact, Frank.

0:14:39 > 0:14:42Do you want me to pop back and get you a marching band belt?

0:14:42 > 0:14:45- No, no, I think I can manage perfectly well, thank you.- Oh.

0:14:45 > 0:14:47Can I help you, Miss Emily?

0:14:50 > 0:14:52Yargh!

0:14:55 > 0:14:58I'm all right. I'm quite all right.

0:14:58 > 0:15:00I have a congenital wrist condition.

0:15:01 > 0:15:03How are you managing, ladies?

0:15:03 > 0:15:06These are wonderful, Frank. Just absolutely perfect!

0:15:13 > 0:15:14Good evening!

0:15:14 > 0:15:16Oh, it is now.

0:15:18 > 0:15:20Good evening, officer. May we be of assistance?

0:15:20 > 0:15:22Are you the Banbury Intricate Craft Circle

0:15:22 > 0:15:24Politely Requests Women's Suffrage?

0:15:24 > 0:15:27They are, I'm not. I'm just here.

0:15:27 > 0:15:28Right, who's in charge?

0:15:28 > 0:15:31Goodness only knows. Frankly, it's a Rangoon fiasco.

0:15:33 > 0:15:35Well, it was Margaret's idea.

0:15:35 > 0:15:37Margaret. Right.

0:15:37 > 0:15:40Margaret? Margaret Northcote?

0:15:40 > 0:15:43You do recognise me! Hello, John!

0:15:45 > 0:15:48I spent my summers on John's father's farm.

0:15:48 > 0:15:50Ooh, John!

0:15:52 > 0:15:55- What are you doing here? - Investigating a crime.

0:15:55 > 0:15:57- What a surprise to see you.- Yes.

0:15:57 > 0:16:00We were always up to something in those hay bales, weren't we?

0:16:00 > 0:16:04Ladies and sailors, ladies and shepherds, ladies and highwaymen.

0:16:04 > 0:16:06- Stand and deliver!- Yes, of course.

0:16:08 > 0:16:10- You won all my marbles. - I gave them you back, though.

0:16:10 > 0:16:12Yes, you did, you did. I still have them all.

0:16:12 > 0:16:14Only just.

0:16:14 > 0:16:16To what do we owe this pleasure, John?

0:16:16 > 0:16:19I'm here to investigate a terrible act of vandalism

0:16:19 > 0:16:21that was carried out on a statue in Banbury library.

0:16:21 > 0:16:24- They axed off her blubbery Mabels. - Indeed.

0:16:24 > 0:16:26I don't want to make any assumptions,

0:16:26 > 0:16:28but Miss Reid from the baker's on Thrumchurch Street

0:16:28 > 0:16:32- told me there was a suffrage group meeting here.- How dare she!

0:16:32 > 0:16:33What a...cow!

0:16:33 > 0:16:35- Gwen!- Sorry.

0:16:35 > 0:16:37I thought I'd pop down and ask you a few questions

0:16:37 > 0:16:40and then let you get back to your...whatever it is.

0:16:40 > 0:16:42You don't think we did it, do you?

0:16:42 > 0:16:44- No, no. Just routine. - Do you have any clues?

0:16:44 > 0:16:46The only things left at the scene

0:16:46 > 0:16:48were a mouldy cheese sandwich on stale bread

0:16:48 > 0:16:50and a chunk of peanut brittle.

0:16:50 > 0:16:53Well, we are suffragettes, but we're very low-key.

0:16:53 > 0:16:56We're just taking these placards on a march to the post office.

0:16:56 > 0:16:59Yes, they look like you're about to barricade yourselves in.

0:16:59 > 0:17:03As I say, I'm sure you've got nothing to do with it.

0:17:03 > 0:17:05Kidnap PM.

0:17:05 > 0:17:07Blow up Parliament.

0:17:07 > 0:17:09Oh, no, no, no, no, no, don't worry about that, John.

0:17:09 > 0:17:12That was... It was... We were... Just a...

0:17:14 > 0:17:15"Kill the King".

0:17:15 > 0:17:17Emily! You are not going out like that!

0:17:17 > 0:17:20- Officer, she's not a suffragette. - Yes, I am.

0:17:20 > 0:17:22No, you're not! You're a naughty girl!

0:17:22 > 0:17:25Well, be that as it may, I need to speak to you all individually.

0:17:25 > 0:17:28I'm sorry, Margaret. I'm going to have to file a full report on this.

0:17:28 > 0:17:30- "Kill the King" and everything. - I understand, John.

0:17:30 > 0:17:34- Officer Thackeray.- Sorry, John... Sir... Officer Thackeray.

0:17:34 > 0:17:36I'm sure it's all very innocent.

0:17:36 > 0:17:38- Is there somewhere I can use for interviews?- The kitchen?

0:17:38 > 0:17:41- Right. Who would like to be interviewed first?- Me!

0:17:43 > 0:17:45- The one that got away. - Oh, stop it, Myrtle!

0:17:49 > 0:17:51Ask me anything you like.

0:17:51 > 0:17:54Right. Yes, well, I intend to.

0:17:54 > 0:17:56I'm an open book.

0:17:57 > 0:18:00- Name?- Myrtle Von Heckling.

0:18:00 > 0:18:02- Age?- Guess.

0:18:03 > 0:18:05- I'm sorry?- See if you can guess.

0:18:07 > 0:18:11Where were you last night between the hours of 10pm and 11pm?

0:18:11 > 0:18:13In bed.

0:18:13 > 0:18:15Alone?

0:18:15 > 0:18:17Alas.

0:18:17 > 0:18:20Right, in bed alone.

0:18:20 > 0:18:22Can anyone verify that?

0:18:23 > 0:18:27No, because you were alone, obviously. Yes.

0:18:30 > 0:18:32Who do you think it was, Margaret?

0:18:32 > 0:18:37Someone who likes peanut brittle and cheese sandwiches, I imagine.

0:18:37 > 0:18:40I like cheese sandwiches! Did I do it?

0:18:41 > 0:18:43I don't know, Gwen. Did you?

0:18:43 > 0:18:44I don't think so!

0:18:44 > 0:18:46You'd know if you did or not, Gwen.

0:18:46 > 0:18:48- How?- You'd remember, Gwen.

0:18:48 > 0:18:50Oh, yes, of course. Sorry.

0:18:51 > 0:18:53Thank you, Mrs Von Heckling.

0:18:53 > 0:18:54Miss.

0:18:56 > 0:18:58- Who's next?- Gwen, would you mind?

0:19:00 > 0:19:02Margaret, if I do not return,

0:19:02 > 0:19:04will someone take Mother her fresh poultice?

0:19:04 > 0:19:05Yes. Yes, I will.

0:19:05 > 0:19:08But don't worry, Gwen. You will return, it's just routine.

0:19:12 > 0:19:14She has the look of a guilty woman.

0:19:15 > 0:19:17Now, there's no need to be nervous.

0:19:17 > 0:19:19- I just want to ask you a few simple...- Yes.

0:19:19 > 0:19:20..questions. What's your...

0:19:20 > 0:19:24Gwen Rapier, 3 Dundonald Street, Banbury, Oxfordshire.

0:19:24 > 0:19:25- And what's...- Seamstress.

0:19:25 > 0:19:26Who...

0:19:26 > 0:19:28My mother.

0:19:28 > 0:19:29- Have you...- No, never.

0:19:29 > 0:19:31I had a proposal from Kenneth Hillingdon,

0:19:31 > 0:19:34but Mother forced me to turn him down. She said he was a simpleton.

0:19:34 > 0:19:36- Were... - No, I was never in love with him,

0:19:36 > 0:19:39but he had a kind heart and I felt he loved me deeply.

0:19:39 > 0:19:41No, Miss Rapier, I wanted to ask you where.

0:19:41 > 0:19:44Oh, sorry. Um, with my mother.

0:19:44 > 0:19:45- Right. All evening?- Yes.

0:19:45 > 0:19:47Thank you. You may go.

0:19:47 > 0:19:49Oh, thank God! Oh! Thank you!

0:19:49 > 0:19:53Just to re-iterate, we have no intention of killing the King.

0:19:53 > 0:19:55You've done very well, Gwen.

0:19:55 > 0:19:57Try not to undo that good.

0:19:57 > 0:20:00- Could you send in the next person, please?- Right.

0:20:03 > 0:20:05I'm in the clear!

0:20:05 > 0:20:07Helen, you're next.

0:20:07 > 0:20:08If I must.

0:20:14 > 0:20:16Mrs Helen Bute, wife of Samuel Bute,

0:20:16 > 0:20:19owner of the Bute Ball Bearing Company.

0:20:19 > 0:20:22Sponsor of the Banbury Flyers, the Banbury Rovers

0:20:22 > 0:20:23and the Banbury Waterboatmen.

0:20:23 > 0:20:26Thank you. Er...

0:20:26 > 0:20:27I think what you are trying to say is,

0:20:27 > 0:20:29"Thank you, Mrs Bute, that will be all."

0:20:31 > 0:20:34Yes, yes. Thank you, Mrs Bute, that will be all.

0:20:40 > 0:20:42- You are too kind. - Would you send in the next one?

0:20:44 > 0:20:45No.

0:20:48 > 0:20:50Who's next, please?

0:20:50 > 0:20:52- Um, Eva? Would you...?- Oh.

0:20:52 > 0:20:55Let me just get this right. You've got...

0:20:55 > 0:20:5814. Yes, 14 children.

0:20:58 > 0:20:59Liberty, Charity, Patience,

0:20:59 > 0:21:01Providence, Prudence, Justina,

0:21:01 > 0:21:03Earnestina, Constance, Clemence,

0:21:03 > 0:21:04Chastity, Virginity,

0:21:04 > 0:21:06Abstinence, Moderation and John.

0:21:08 > 0:21:11That's 13 girls, 1 boy.

0:21:11 > 0:21:12Last night, you were...

0:21:12 > 0:21:14Last night, Virginity was locked

0:21:14 > 0:21:16in the coalhole by Chastity and Abstinence

0:21:16 > 0:21:18because she'd smashed Chastity's doll on the fire grate.

0:21:18 > 0:21:20Virginity, she's got a terrible temper.

0:21:20 > 0:21:23She gets that from her father's side. He's hot-headed.

0:21:23 > 0:21:24He weren't there last night,

0:21:24 > 0:21:27otherwise they wouldn't dare behave like that in front of him.

0:21:27 > 0:21:29They gave the key to Liberty, who's two,

0:21:29 > 0:21:31so only the good Lord knows where that went!

0:21:31 > 0:21:33It was the housekeeper's night off,

0:21:33 > 0:21:34so cook and I, we had to bash down the door

0:21:34 > 0:21:36with my husband's bronze lion doorstop.

0:21:36 > 0:21:39- Well, I think that's... - Bless the little pigeon!

0:21:39 > 0:21:41She was fast asleep on a pile of coal

0:21:41 > 0:21:43by the time we smashed the door down!

0:21:43 > 0:21:45I knew I probably should give her a punishment

0:21:45 > 0:21:48for smashing Chastity's doll, but I just didn't have the heart.

0:21:48 > 0:21:50See, my feeling is Virginity's punishment

0:21:50 > 0:21:53had already been meted out by Chastity and Abstinence.

0:21:53 > 0:21:55Yes, well, thank you for your time, Mrs, er...

0:21:55 > 0:21:57Do you have any children?

0:21:57 > 0:22:00Would you just send in Margaret, please?

0:22:01 > 0:22:03Of course.

0:22:06 > 0:22:07Your turn, Margaret!

0:22:07 > 0:22:09Right. Yes.

0:22:11 > 0:22:14# John and Margaret sitting in a tree. #

0:22:14 > 0:22:15Mother!

0:22:17 > 0:22:21Well...this really couldn't be any worse for Margaret, could it?

0:22:21 > 0:22:26Huh! I mean, picketing the post office. What a catastrophic idea!

0:22:26 > 0:22:28I thought we should picket Betty's sweet shop.

0:22:28 > 0:22:30She's always very miserly with her peanut brittle.

0:22:30 > 0:22:32If they was going to picket anywhere,

0:22:32 > 0:22:35it should be Mrs Allam's cheesemonger's on Gridley Hill.

0:22:35 > 0:22:38She once sold me mouldy cheddar and told me it was blue Leicester.

0:22:38 > 0:22:42Or that dreadful bakery on Thrumchurch Street

0:22:42 > 0:22:44run by that slattern - Miss Reid.

0:22:44 > 0:22:46The one who shopped us over.

0:22:46 > 0:22:48Why anyone would let her near flour,

0:22:48 > 0:22:50eggs and a mixing bowl with those hands!

0:22:50 > 0:22:51Oh, I know! Have you seen them?

0:22:51 > 0:22:54She's got filthy fingers like burnt sausages.

0:23:05 > 0:23:06Well...

0:23:06 > 0:23:08..this is...

0:23:08 > 0:23:11However could we have guessed we'd be in such a situation?

0:23:11 > 0:23:14Ah, it's just routine. Nothing to worry about.

0:23:15 > 0:23:17Right, just going to ask you a few questions.

0:23:17 > 0:23:19You know my name, obviously.

0:23:19 > 0:23:20Not your married name.

0:23:20 > 0:23:22It's Thackeray... Unwin.

0:23:22 > 0:23:25Yes, Unwin. I'm married. Married.

0:23:25 > 0:23:2612 long years.

0:23:30 > 0:23:31Extraordinary, isn't it,

0:23:31 > 0:23:34that we should meet like this, again,

0:23:34 > 0:23:36after all these years?

0:23:36 > 0:23:38You remembered my name.

0:23:38 > 0:23:41Yes. Well, I'm good with names, faces.

0:23:41 > 0:23:43It helps in my profession.

0:23:43 > 0:23:46Yes. You must be professional.

0:23:46 > 0:23:48What's your address?

0:23:48 > 0:23:5214 Lavender Road, Banbury, obviously. And yours?

0:23:55 > 0:23:56Um...

0:23:56 > 0:24:00No. just...just ask your questions.

0:24:00 > 0:24:03Right, I will. Where were you last night?

0:24:04 > 0:24:07My husband was in his bedroom, reading, and...

0:24:09 > 0:24:11..I was in mine...alone...

0:24:11 > 0:24:15on my own...writing.

0:24:15 > 0:24:17Were you there all night?

0:24:17 > 0:24:19I can't do this!

0:24:19 > 0:24:21I must think of my son Cecil.

0:24:24 > 0:24:25Was he awake?

0:24:25 > 0:24:27He sleeps fitfully. He wears callipers.

0:24:29 > 0:24:32Well, I, er...I think that's all. Thank you.

0:24:32 > 0:24:34Yes. Yes. Goodbye, John.

0:24:34 > 0:24:36Thank you for being strong for both of us.

0:24:36 > 0:24:37It's the right thing to do.

0:24:41 > 0:24:43- Goodbye.- Bye, then.

0:24:44 > 0:24:46Yes, you can't look up.

0:24:46 > 0:24:49It's too painful. I understand. Goodbye.

0:24:51 > 0:24:53SHE SIGHS

0:24:55 > 0:24:57Oh! Oh, yes.

0:24:57 > 0:24:59- Sorry.- Yes.

0:24:59 > 0:25:00Right. Well, I'm off.

0:25:00 > 0:25:03Wait! Aren't you going to interview me?

0:25:03 > 0:25:05- I don't really see there's any... - What if I did it?

0:25:05 > 0:25:06But you didn't! Be quiet, Emily!

0:25:06 > 0:25:08I did! I did it! Arrest me!

0:25:08 > 0:25:10She didn't. She was with me all evening.

0:25:10 > 0:25:13What colour paint did you use to paint out her...

0:25:13 > 0:25:15Flannery Ann?

0:25:15 > 0:25:18Um... B-lue?

0:25:19 > 0:25:20Yell...?

0:25:21 > 0:25:23Red?

0:25:23 > 0:25:24FAINT WHISTLE >

0:25:24 > 0:25:26You're all perfectly innocent.

0:25:26 > 0:25:29Now, if you'll excuse me, I shall leave you to get on with your...

0:25:29 > 0:25:32whatever it is. Ladies. Frank. Thomas.

0:25:32 > 0:25:34FAINT COMMOTION

0:25:35 > 0:25:36Officer Thackeray.

0:25:40 > 0:25:43Right. Come on, everyone, placards up. Let's get to the post office.

0:25:43 > 0:25:45I am abstaining.

0:25:45 > 0:25:46Everyone except Helen!

0:25:49 > 0:25:52Oh! Mrs Unwin, the post office shuts in five minutes.

0:25:52 > 0:25:54- Oh, no!- Shall I

0:25:54 > 0:25:57pop down the road and see if they'll stay open for a bit longer?

0:25:57 > 0:25:59Would you, Frank? Would you?

0:25:59 > 0:26:01I know Bob from the Vegetable Grower's Guild.

0:26:01 > 0:26:04Do you think we need a signal to alert us to danger?

0:26:04 > 0:26:05What, like a whistle?

0:26:05 > 0:26:07Oh, I never whistle, it's common.

0:26:07 > 0:26:10Everyone can whistle, can't they? THEY WHISTLE

0:26:10 > 0:26:12We don't need a whistle! Can't we just go?!

0:26:12 > 0:26:13How about a bird call?

0:26:13 > 0:26:15What about an owl? We can all do an owl, can't we? Owl?

0:26:15 > 0:26:17THEY IMITATE TAWNY OWL

0:26:19 > 0:26:21Yes. On your own, Gwen.

0:26:21 > 0:26:23SHE HOWLS

0:26:23 > 0:26:26- Yes, not your wolf, Gwen, your owl. - That was my owl.

0:26:26 > 0:26:27SHE HOWLS

0:26:27 > 0:26:28That's definitely a wolf.

0:26:28 > 0:26:31We can we all do a wolf, can't we? THEY HOWL

0:26:33 > 0:26:36Argh! I can't stand this! I can't bear it any longer!

0:26:36 > 0:26:40I wish to be turned inside out and rolled on the salting room floor.

0:26:40 > 0:26:43Anything! Anything but this interminable inaction!

0:26:43 > 0:26:46Can't we just do something?! Somebody just DO something!

0:26:48 > 0:26:50Up the women! Huzzah!

0:26:50 > 0:26:52- SMASH - Oh!

0:26:57 > 0:26:59Oh, no!

0:26:59 > 0:27:00< WHISTLE BLOWS

0:27:00 > 0:27:01GWEN HOWLS

0:27:01 > 0:27:03Yes, all right, Gwen, thank you. Yes, yes.

0:27:03 > 0:27:06Who threw this?

0:27:06 > 0:27:07I did!

0:27:07 > 0:27:09No, I threw it. Arrest ME!

0:27:09 > 0:27:11No, you didn't! Be quiet, Emily!

0:27:11 > 0:27:13Who has been consorting with Miss Reid

0:27:13 > 0:27:14from the Thrumchurch Street bakery?

0:27:16 > 0:27:19I have! I'm sorry, everyone!

0:27:19 > 0:27:21Gwen! How could you?

0:27:21 > 0:27:23I just didn't have time to make our tiffin!

0:27:23 > 0:27:27I would never ever normally buy shop-bought cakes, officer!

0:27:27 > 0:27:30Well, it was Miss Reid, Mrs Allam the cheesemonger

0:27:30 > 0:27:32and Betty from the sweet shop who attacked the Venus.

0:27:32 > 0:27:34No!

0:27:34 > 0:27:37Am I an accomplice? Are you going to arrest me?

0:27:37 > 0:27:40Margaret, Mother's poultice is in the larder on the meat shelf.

0:27:40 > 0:27:42Please don't force-feed me!

0:27:42 > 0:27:44No, that won't be necessary.

0:27:44 > 0:27:46As far as I can see, the only crime you've committed

0:27:46 > 0:27:48is buying cakes from Miss Reid's bakery.

0:27:48 > 0:27:52I recognised it because I use them as slow compost on my courgettes.

0:27:54 > 0:27:55Do you really?

0:27:55 > 0:27:57Yes. They work a treat.

0:27:57 > 0:28:00Anyway, it turns out you're not the only suffragettes in Banbury.

0:28:00 > 0:28:03They're calling themselves the Free Suffragette Army.

0:28:03 > 0:28:07Now, that IS a strong name, don't you think, Margaret?

0:28:08 > 0:28:11The post office will stay open for ten more minutes!

0:28:11 > 0:28:15All right, come on, then. Placards up.

0:28:15 > 0:28:18No. Put that down, Emily. Carry your grandmother's.

0:28:20 > 0:28:22UNINTELLIGIBLE AND OUT OF TUNE SINGING

0:28:41 > 0:28:44# Nana was a suffragette

0:28:44 > 0:28:46# It's as if she's still alive

0:28:46 > 0:28:48# Nana was a suffragette

0:28:48 > 0:28:50# Their voices still survive

0:28:50 > 0:28:56# Singing Votes for women is just the beginning

0:28:56 > 0:29:00# You haven't seen anything yet...#

0:29:00 > 0:29:03Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd