1998

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0:00:20 > 0:00:22One eventful night in 1996,

0:00:22 > 0:00:25comedy and rock'n'roll had an ill-advised fumble

0:00:25 > 0:00:28with devastating effects.

0:00:28 > 0:00:32The resulting offspring would soon become famed for its acerbic wit,

0:00:32 > 0:00:36musical know-how and celebrity-ish friends.

0:00:36 > 0:00:39It soon became known as Never Mind The Buzzcocks.

0:00:39 > 0:00:42Calm down, God! It's only a pop quiz!

0:00:42 > 0:00:46Always the first in line to offer words of wisdom and compassion...

0:00:46 > 0:00:48Come on, bellends, do something!

0:00:48 > 0:00:51..this show became an oracle for the world of entertainment.

0:00:51 > 0:00:53I'm Simon Amstell and if you think I'm a poor booking,

0:00:53 > 0:00:55let's meet tonight's guests.

0:00:55 > 0:00:57And when it comes to splits, spats...

0:00:57 > 0:01:00- See you later.- Why? We're having fun!- I ain't.

0:01:00 > 0:01:03..and guessing which member of a line-up used to be the drummer

0:01:03 > 0:01:07in some band you barely remember, Buzzcocks has seen it all.

0:01:07 > 0:01:10So join us as we stumble down memory lane

0:01:10 > 0:01:14and see a little bit of this, that and them.

0:01:14 > 0:01:16You are watching...

0:01:19 > 0:01:21A year which saw one of Britain's hottest exports

0:01:21 > 0:01:23make a big splash in Hollywood.

0:01:23 > 0:01:26Police in Beverly Hills have confirmed

0:01:26 > 0:01:28that the singer George Michael has been charged

0:01:28 > 0:01:31with committing a lewd act in a park toilet.

0:01:31 > 0:01:35Members of our Crime Suppression Unit were monitoring the park yesterday

0:01:35 > 0:01:38and did observe Mr Michael engaged in a lewd act.

0:01:38 > 0:01:40In an interview for American television,

0:01:40 > 0:01:44he said he had put himself in a stupid and vulnerable situation.

0:01:44 > 0:01:47Up until a few years ago, people had no idea that George Michael was gay.

0:01:47 > 0:01:51Gradually, of course, the clues revealed themselves - there was the disco music, the earring

0:01:51 > 0:01:54and the waving a cock in a policeman's face in a public toilet.

0:01:54 > 0:01:55LAUGHTER

0:01:55 > 0:01:59During his dispute with Sony, George Michael did absolutely nothing for four years.

0:01:59 > 0:02:02He got the idea from Andrew Ridgeley's contribution to Wham!

0:02:02 > 0:02:05Despite his indiscretions, George and his tunes

0:02:05 > 0:02:08have always managed to work Buzzcocks into a frenzy.

0:02:08 > 0:02:12THEY HUM

0:02:20 > 0:02:21Andrew!

0:02:23 > 0:02:26- Careless Whisper, by George Michael. - You're quite right, one point.

0:02:26 > 0:02:30And not to be outdone, the Spice Girls also whipped out a member.

0:02:30 > 0:02:34After days of speculation, Geri Halliwell, otherwise known as Ginger Spice,

0:02:34 > 0:02:37has confirmed that she has left the Spice Girls.

0:02:37 > 0:02:38SHE SCREAMS

0:02:38 > 0:02:41I don't believe it, not Geri. Geri's my favourite.

0:02:41 > 0:02:45Geri is the one that keeps it all together. She's the one with the bounce, the go, girl power.

0:02:45 > 0:02:47I think they'll just carry on as normal without her,

0:02:47 > 0:02:49but without a mouthy ginger woman.

0:02:49 > 0:02:51Thanks, Chris.

0:02:51 > 0:02:53Where's Geri gone?

0:02:53 > 0:02:55SHE SINGS: Where has Geri gone?

0:02:55 > 0:02:57THEY SING: Where has Geri gone?

0:02:57 > 0:03:01Naturally, Geri decided to become a UN spokesperson.

0:03:01 > 0:03:03Here's her spokesperson to explain.

0:03:03 > 0:03:08Sadly, I would like to confirm that I have left the Spice Girls.

0:03:08 > 0:03:11This is because of differences between us.

0:03:11 > 0:03:14MUSIC: "Goodbye" by the Spice Girls

0:03:14 > 0:03:18And over at Buzzcocks HQ, Mark Lamarr clearly had a soft spot

0:03:18 > 0:03:20for a certain former Spice Girl.

0:03:20 > 0:03:25Just last week, the famous Union Jack dress worn by Geri Spice was auctioned for £40,000.

0:03:25 > 0:03:30It was particularly valuable as it was the one she wore at the coronation of Queen Victoria.

0:03:30 > 0:03:32Geri is an obsessive devotee of yoga and, with any luck,

0:03:32 > 0:03:35she'll carry on until she actually does disappear up her own arse.

0:03:35 > 0:03:38LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

0:03:38 > 0:03:40Geri Halliwell was brought up as a Jehovah's Witness

0:03:40 > 0:03:45and, though she doesn't practise any more, she still likes being knocked up early on a Sunday morning.

0:03:45 > 0:03:47LAUGHTER

0:03:48 > 0:03:52Actually, can we, can we just show the beginning of the Geri Halliwell video,

0:03:52 > 0:03:55because there's actually evidence of an anal probe going on right near the beginning.

0:03:55 > 0:03:58- There it is!- There it is.

0:03:58 > 0:03:59She kind of liked it.

0:03:59 > 0:04:03Imagine travelling all that time just to poke Geri Halliwell in the arse.

0:04:03 > 0:04:05In time-honoured fashion,

0:04:05 > 0:04:08the Spice Girls vowed to remain defiantly intact.

0:04:08 > 0:04:11But surely, there was no harm in stretching themselves artistically

0:04:11 > 0:04:13with a quick solo project.

0:04:13 > 0:04:16First up, Mel B joined forces with Missy Elliot

0:04:16 > 0:04:19and hit the Number 1 spot in September 1998 with this.

0:04:19 > 0:04:23MUSIC: "I Want You Back" by Melanie B and Missy Elliott

0:04:23 > 0:04:25SHE LAUGHS

0:04:25 > 0:04:28Number four looks like he's been there, seen it, done it.

0:04:28 > 0:04:30LAUGHTER

0:04:30 > 0:04:31I think number six, Mark,

0:04:31 > 0:04:34looks like she's had some wild willy in her time.

0:04:34 > 0:04:38LAUGHTER

0:04:38 > 0:04:40Very funny!

0:04:40 > 0:04:41Now, you think it's...

0:04:41 > 0:04:44- I think it's four, without a doubt. - She thinks it's four.

0:04:44 > 0:04:46- Now, even though Sean knows John... - Do you?

0:04:46 > 0:04:49I can't just come out, "Hi, John, how are you doing, number two?"

0:04:49 > 0:04:51- Yeah, you can, cos you're on our side, so do it!- Exactly!

0:04:51 > 0:04:54- You should know who it is. - I've said it.

0:04:54 > 0:04:55He does know who it is!

0:04:55 > 0:04:57You are going to get battered.

0:04:57 > 0:05:00Oh, right, yeah, talking about yourself again. Yeah.

0:05:00 > 0:05:01LAUGHTER

0:05:01 > 0:05:04Yeah, I'm rubber, you're glue, bounces off me, sticks to you.

0:05:04 > 0:05:06LAUGHTER

0:05:06 > 0:05:08Could you two please just have sex and get it over with?

0:05:08 > 0:05:11LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

0:05:15 > 0:05:18Next out of the blocks, Sporty Spice teamed up

0:05:18 > 0:05:22with Canadian gravel-voiced soft rocker Bryan Adams.

0:05:22 > 0:05:26Here's Mel taking part in an old Buzzcocks' favourite -

0:05:26 > 0:05:28the Indecipherable Lyrics round.

0:05:28 > 0:05:31And I reckon this whole song is actually about, you know,

0:05:31 > 0:05:34the three brothers going to Wigan for a night out.

0:05:34 > 0:05:38And they were trying to get like sorted for the night,

0:05:38 > 0:05:40so, you know, I'll read you the words, anyway.

0:05:40 > 0:05:44Well, first of all, "I get a lump and I get high,"

0:05:44 > 0:05:46which I reckon he means like a lump of puff.

0:05:46 > 0:05:49Right. A lump of puff, did you say?

0:05:49 > 0:05:51You know... Wacky baccy, yeah.

0:05:51 > 0:05:55So, anyway, he can't get any Es, but, you know, he's really trying.

0:05:55 > 0:05:58So he's going to Wigan Heaven in his shoes.

0:05:58 > 0:06:02"I'm on Temazepam So I just can't lose

0:06:02 > 0:06:05"You know, it's all right, it's OK I'll live to see another day

0:06:05 > 0:06:08"We can try to understand Where did you put the Rizlas, man?"

0:06:08 > 0:06:12LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

0:06:13 > 0:06:15Let's hear you singing it along with the brothers.

0:06:15 > 0:06:17MUSIC: "Stayin' Alive" by Bee Gees

0:06:17 > 0:06:19# I get a lump and I get high

0:06:19 > 0:06:21# I can't get Es, but I really try

0:06:21 > 0:06:23# I'm going to Wigan Heaven in my shoes

0:06:23 > 0:06:25# I'm on Temazepam and I just can't lose

0:06:25 > 0:06:29# You know, it's all right, it's OK I'll live to see another day

0:06:29 > 0:06:32# And we can try to understand

0:06:32 > 0:06:34# Where did you put the Rizlas, man? #

0:06:34 > 0:06:35Nice work!

0:06:35 > 0:06:38CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:06:39 > 0:06:42Over the years, Mel C has become a firm friend of the show

0:06:42 > 0:06:44with regular appearances.

0:06:44 > 0:06:47Your mum didn't call you Sporty as a kid, did she?

0:06:47 > 0:06:50- Christened Sporty.- Really? - Melanie C Sporty Chisholm.

0:06:50 > 0:06:52Jism what?

0:06:52 > 0:06:53LAUGHTER

0:06:53 > 0:06:56Sporty Jism...

0:06:56 > 0:06:57I wish!

0:06:57 > 0:06:59LAUGHTER

0:06:59 > 0:07:01- Mel, are you all right?- Yeah.

0:07:01 > 0:07:06Do you remember when we all thought you were a lesbian, that was weird, wasn't it?

0:07:06 > 0:07:07Why was that?

0:07:07 > 0:07:10I think because I had short hair, tattoos

0:07:10 > 0:07:12and I didn't have a boyfriend.

0:07:12 > 0:07:14Of course, now, it's just a silly rumour. You're pregnant now.

0:07:14 > 0:07:17Well, you know what, I'm trying to sell my records.

0:07:17 > 0:07:21And which of the Spice Girls' children would you least like her to turn out like?

0:07:21 > 0:07:23LAUGHTER

0:07:23 > 0:07:26- They're all lovely.- Which would you say is the worst mother?

0:07:26 > 0:07:28LAUGHTER

0:07:28 > 0:07:30Can you imagine if I seriously just said one of them?

0:07:30 > 0:07:33Just say, "Oh, it's Emma, she's a real awful bitch."

0:07:33 > 0:07:34LAUGHTER

0:07:34 > 0:07:38When you were the Spice Girls, if you'd actually been named after spices,

0:07:38 > 0:07:40- I suppose you'd have been nutmeg, yeah?- Why is that?

0:07:40 > 0:07:44- Well, because you're kind of hard, aren't you?- I think that's a misconception about me.

0:07:44 > 0:07:47- Now I've met you, I feel terrible about saying that.- I'm really soft, yeah.

0:07:47 > 0:07:51I suppose Baby would have been vanilla, cos it's kind of bland.

0:07:51 > 0:07:52No.

0:07:52 > 0:07:56All right, well, let's call her garlic, cos she's bulbous. No?

0:07:56 > 0:07:59I suppose, Mel B would have been cumin,

0:07:59 > 0:08:01cos she's a mucky bastard, isn't she?

0:08:01 > 0:08:03LAUGHTER

0:08:03 > 0:08:06- That is fitting.- Fair enough, innit?- Fair play.

0:08:06 > 0:08:08Thank you, it's a privilege to have you here.

0:08:08 > 0:08:09LAUGHTER

0:08:09 > 0:08:11The Spice Girls and their music

0:08:11 > 0:08:14were a constant source of entertainment on Buzzcocks.

0:08:14 > 0:08:16Recognise this one, Spice fans?

0:08:16 > 0:08:20THEY HUM

0:08:25 > 0:08:27HE BRAYS

0:08:30 > 0:08:34THEY HUM

0:08:38 > 0:08:39HE SCREAMS

0:08:41 > 0:08:42HE SCREAMS

0:08:48 > 0:08:51HE BARKS

0:08:51 > 0:08:53APPLAUSE

0:08:53 > 0:08:55- Have you finished?- Yeah, go on.

0:08:55 > 0:08:58- It's that Spice Girls one, isn't it? - Yes.

0:08:58 > 0:09:01- Which one?- It's, er...Say You'll Be There.

0:09:01 > 0:09:03It is Say You'll Be There, well done.

0:09:03 > 0:09:06CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:09:15 > 0:09:18With its floppy hairdos, swaggering frontmen

0:09:18 > 0:09:20and misjudged dance moves,

0:09:20 > 0:09:25the '90s saw Indie dominating the musical landscape.

0:09:25 > 0:09:271998 was a very exciting time for Buzzcocks,

0:09:27 > 0:09:32as it saw two members of Indie Manc Royalty grace the studio.

0:09:32 > 0:09:36First up, Happy Mondays' lord of the dance Bez.

0:09:36 > 0:09:37HE HUMS

0:09:37 > 0:09:39Oh, I've forgotten how it goes.

0:09:39 > 0:09:41LAUGHTER

0:09:41 > 0:09:44- I'll do it then.- Come on. - Just dance!- I'll dance, yeah.

0:09:44 > 0:09:47Hey, do that helpful dance that you've been doing.

0:09:47 > 0:09:50LAUGHTER

0:09:50 > 0:09:52You're twisting his melon, man.

0:09:52 > 0:09:54LAUGHTER

0:09:54 > 0:09:56Right, go on.

0:09:56 > 0:09:59THEY HUM

0:10:03 > 0:10:05HE HUMS LOUDER

0:10:08 > 0:10:09Dance!

0:10:16 > 0:10:19All right, hold on, that's enough there. Can someone get in touch with Desmond Morris?

0:10:19 > 0:10:22Cos I've forgotten what separates us from the animals.

0:10:22 > 0:10:24LAUGHTER

0:10:25 > 0:10:27- I have no idea at all.- Really?

0:10:27 > 0:10:29It's quite an easy one, I'll pass it over.

0:10:29 > 0:10:31- Born Slippy.- It was Born Slippy, by Underworld.

0:10:31 > 0:10:33APPLAUSE

0:10:33 > 0:10:34Let's play it.

0:10:34 > 0:10:37MUSIC: "Born Slippy" by Underworld

0:10:37 > 0:10:39LAUGHTER

0:10:45 > 0:10:49Next up, the Stone Roses' four-string king Mani.

0:10:49 > 0:10:54THEY IMITATE DRUMS

0:11:03 > 0:11:04See you later, man.

0:11:04 > 0:11:06LAUGHTER

0:11:06 > 0:11:11Oh! I know this one, I've heard this somewhere before, haven't I?

0:11:11 > 0:11:13It's got a bit of Fools Gold...

0:11:13 > 0:11:16- It is Fools Gold, by the Stone Roses, well done.- It's yours!

0:11:16 > 0:11:18APPLAUSE

0:11:18 > 0:11:20In 1990, the Stone Roses played to 30,000 people

0:11:20 > 0:11:23on a patch of waste ground surrounded by factories and chemical plants

0:11:23 > 0:11:25or, to give it its proper name, Manchester.

0:11:25 > 0:11:27LAUGHTER

0:11:27 > 0:11:311998 saw a multitude of other Indie faces appear on the show.

0:11:31 > 0:11:34Sing along if you can remember the words.

0:11:34 > 0:11:37# It's all over the front page

0:11:37 > 0:11:40# You give me road rage... #

0:11:40 > 0:11:44# If it's good enough for you It's good enough for me

0:11:44 > 0:11:48# It's good enough for two It's what I want to see... #

0:11:48 > 0:11:52# Are you going for gold... #

0:11:52 > 0:11:56# You were just my inbetween Just my inbetween

0:11:56 > 0:11:58# You're such an inbetweener... #

0:11:58 > 0:11:59# Tequila

0:11:59 > 0:12:01# It makes me happy

0:12:01 > 0:12:05# Con Tequila, it feels fine

0:12:05 > 0:12:07# Con Tequila when the doors are opened... #

0:12:07 > 0:12:10Nice to see Buzzcocks' very own Sean Hughes

0:12:10 > 0:12:12popping up and making a cameo there.

0:12:12 > 0:12:13# ..Tequila... #

0:12:17 > 0:12:191998 was a year of confusion.

0:12:19 > 0:12:24I did not have sexual relations with that woman.

0:12:24 > 0:12:25Seems pretty straightforward.

0:12:25 > 0:12:28Indeed, I did have a relationship with Miss Lewinsky

0:12:28 > 0:12:29that was not appropriate.

0:12:29 > 0:12:32Hang on, I thought he said... Oh, never mind.

0:12:32 > 0:12:35Also in need of a trip to the dry cleaners...

0:12:35 > 0:12:38The Deputy Prime Minister John Prescott found himself comforted

0:12:38 > 0:12:41by one of the Spice Girls at the BRIT Awards last night

0:12:41 > 0:12:44after being soaked with a bucket of ice.

0:12:44 > 0:12:47John Prescott was given the cold shoulder at the BRITS,

0:12:47 > 0:12:50not to mention a cold back, front and arse

0:12:50 > 0:12:52by Chumbawamba singer Danbert Nobacon.

0:12:53 > 0:12:55Talking of no Bacon...

0:12:55 > 0:12:59You'll no doubt have heard that Richard is no longer on the programme.

0:12:59 > 0:13:01Yes, he agrees he had to leave

0:13:01 > 0:13:03and, like you, we are really going to miss him.

0:13:03 > 0:13:06I believe that Richard has not only let himself

0:13:06 > 0:13:08and the team on Blue Peter down,

0:13:08 > 0:13:11but he's also let all of you down badly.

0:13:11 > 0:13:14- Come on, boys.- Easy there. - Good luck.

0:13:14 > 0:13:17SHE SNIFFS HE SNIFFS

0:13:17 > 0:13:18Were you sniffing, Katy Hill?

0:13:18 > 0:13:21Has Richard Bacon been dealing to you?

0:13:21 > 0:13:24Actually, you spent the afternoon with Katy, what, are there any dark bits?

0:13:24 > 0:13:26Easy!

0:13:26 > 0:13:28LAUGHTER

0:13:29 > 0:13:34'98 saw England tragically knocked out of another World Cup,

0:13:34 > 0:13:37but on the bright side, many of us learnt to tie a sarong.

0:13:37 > 0:13:39ENGLAND!

0:13:39 > 0:13:41We also saw yogurt's Martine McCutcheon

0:13:41 > 0:13:45make her own dramatic exit from Albert Square.

0:13:45 > 0:13:46BRAKES SQUEAL

0:13:46 > 0:13:48SHE YELLS

0:13:50 > 0:13:51Oh!

0:13:51 > 0:13:53Oh, please...

0:13:53 > 0:13:54He's allowed to, you lot took your time.

0:13:54 > 0:13:56Look, don't you get stroppy with me.

0:13:56 > 0:13:58I'm allowed to get stroppy, I'm a woman.

0:13:58 > 0:14:01Martine, you were road kill three months ago.

0:14:01 > 0:14:02LAUGHTER

0:14:02 > 0:14:04You know when they always say to comedians,

0:14:04 > 0:14:06"What's the best heckle you've ever heard?"

0:14:06 > 0:14:10Do you remember you were on Live And Kicking and someone said,

0:14:10 > 0:14:12"Where do you see yourself in ten years' time?"

0:14:12 > 0:14:15And a kid in the audience shouted, "UK Gold."

0:14:15 > 0:14:18LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

0:14:22 > 0:14:23What a great heckle that was!

0:14:25 > 0:14:27I'm... I just want to say I'm a big fan of yours.

0:14:27 > 0:14:29LAUGHTER

0:14:29 > 0:14:331998 chart news now and here's one of the year's biggest hits

0:14:33 > 0:14:36as performed to this encyclopaedic fountain of musical knowledge,

0:14:36 > 0:14:39Chris 'The Music Man' Moyles.

0:14:39 > 0:14:41THEY HUM

0:14:41 > 0:14:45THEY IMITATE DRUMS AND TRUMPETS

0:14:53 > 0:14:55- Come on!- I'm only 24.

0:14:55 > 0:14:57LAUGHTER

0:14:57 > 0:14:59It was a big hit on Radio 1 this year, I think.

0:14:59 > 0:15:03- It was what?- Big hit on Radio 1 this year. Do you not listen to them?

0:15:03 > 0:15:04LAUGHTER

0:15:04 > 0:15:07Let's play it and find out what it should have been.

0:15:07 > 0:15:08Very good version, I think.

0:15:08 > 0:15:12MUSIC: "Dance The Night Away" by The Mavericks

0:15:19 > 0:15:23# Just wanna dance the night away... #

0:15:23 > 0:15:25The answer was, of course, The Mavericks,

0:15:25 > 0:15:27with Dance The Night Away.

0:15:27 > 0:15:31And here are some of the other tunes we danced to in 1998.

0:15:31 > 0:15:34Robbie Williams had a huge hit with Millennium.

0:15:34 > 0:15:36Bit of pop trivia,

0:15:36 > 0:15:39this video was actually filmed inside one of Phill Jupitus' shirts.

0:15:45 > 0:15:481998 was a bumper year for All Saints

0:15:48 > 0:15:51as they achieved two BRIT awards and two Number 1 singles.

0:15:51 > 0:15:53More on them later.

0:15:53 > 0:15:55And eight years after her last solo number one,

0:15:55 > 0:15:57Cher finally found her voice.

0:15:57 > 0:15:59Well, she found somebody's voice.

0:15:59 > 0:16:06ELECTRONICALLY ALTERED VOICE: # And I can't break through There's no talking to you... #

0:16:06 > 0:16:09So... ELECTRONICALLY ALTERED: ..sad that you're leaving.

0:16:09 > 0:16:11LAUGHTER

0:16:13 > 0:16:16Oh, dear. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

0:16:16 > 0:16:18I'm afraid the real answer was...

0:16:18 > 0:16:23ELECTRONICALLY ALTERED: # It takes time to believe in, but I can't break through. #

0:16:23 > 0:16:25APPLAUSE

0:16:29 > 0:16:32Buzzcocks has featured nearly 1,000 panellists

0:16:32 > 0:16:34in its 17-year run.

0:16:34 > 0:16:37But one man holds the record for the most guest appearances.

0:16:37 > 0:16:41A feat that requires gargantuan levels of patience,

0:16:41 > 0:16:43determination...and availability.

0:16:43 > 0:16:46Richard Fairbrass of Right Said Fred

0:16:46 > 0:16:47has guested on the show

0:16:47 > 0:16:49a record-breaking seven times.

0:16:49 > 0:16:52Let's enjoy some of his best Buzzcocks bits.

0:16:52 > 0:16:56- I've kissed girls too, you know, I have.- Not the same way.

0:16:56 > 0:16:58I wasn't too keen, but I have done it.

0:16:58 > 0:17:00LAUGHTER

0:17:00 > 0:17:02APPLAUSE

0:17:02 > 0:17:03It is true to say

0:17:03 > 0:17:06that I have been a player of the pink oboe.

0:17:06 > 0:17:08LAUGHTER

0:17:08 > 0:17:12And I can raise a real tune on it, occasionally.

0:17:12 > 0:17:13Really?

0:17:13 > 0:17:14But not for some time.

0:17:14 > 0:17:18LAUGHTER

0:17:18 > 0:17:21It's the idea of him in bed with someone and just the duvet

0:17:21 > 0:17:22and underneath the duvet...

0:17:22 > 0:17:25HE HUMS: "Pennsylvania 6-5000" by Hotel Pennsylvania

0:17:25 > 0:17:28If you know the holes to put your finger on, you can play a tune.

0:17:28 > 0:17:29LAUGHTER

0:17:29 > 0:17:32- You're always like this when I'm on the show!- I know.

0:17:32 > 0:17:34We should just go out, kiss and get it over with.

0:17:34 > 0:17:37- I'm... Let's kiss now. - You're kissing everything.

0:17:37 > 0:17:38Let's do the gay Buzzcocks kiss.

0:17:38 > 0:17:40FEMALE AUDIENCE MEMBER: Ugh!

0:17:40 > 0:17:43LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

0:17:43 > 0:17:46You know, I've actually done more shows than Bill.

0:17:46 > 0:17:47On one of the many, many glorious shows

0:17:47 > 0:17:50that I've done in this programme,

0:17:50 > 0:17:51Lemmy was on it.

0:17:51 > 0:17:53- He was!- And he walked off.

0:17:53 > 0:17:55But he walked off after we'd finished recording.

0:17:55 > 0:17:59- He didn't know that, I think he thought he was making a huge statement.- OK, yeah.

0:17:59 > 0:18:02When he walked out the studio with his Jack Daniels and his roadies,

0:18:02 > 0:18:06Fairbrass came up behind me and went, "I think he's overcompensating for something."

0:18:06 > 0:18:08LAUGHTER

0:18:08 > 0:18:11THEY HUM

0:18:16 > 0:18:17HE YAPS

0:18:17 > 0:18:19Chinchillas being fed into a mangle.

0:18:21 > 0:18:24- This is modern music, isn't it? - Yeah.- Well, no, it's pretty old.

0:18:24 > 0:18:26- Well, timeless, it's timeless. - No.- It is timeless.

0:18:26 > 0:18:28Is it a rehash of an old song?

0:18:28 > 0:18:31It was actually I'm Too Sexy, by Right Said Fred.

0:18:31 > 0:18:34MUSIC: "I'm Too Sexy" by Right Said Fred

0:18:34 > 0:18:36That was nothing like it!

0:18:39 > 0:18:41Rubbish!

0:18:41 > 0:18:44Now I do the jokes about the artist.

0:18:44 > 0:18:47I'll shut up then.

0:18:47 > 0:18:50The success of Right Said Fred surprised Richard. He said,

0:18:50 > 0:18:53"It feels like I've gate-crashed a showbiz party and I'll be asked to leave soon."

0:18:53 > 0:18:56But that was 15 years ago and thank God he's still here.

0:18:56 > 0:19:00TANNOY: 'Paging Mr Fairbrass, paging Mr Fairbrass. Your time is up.'

0:19:00 > 0:19:03LAUGHTER

0:19:06 > 0:19:09Right under our noses, it's bands from one particular country

0:19:09 > 0:19:12that are starting to dominate the charts here.

0:19:14 > 0:19:191998 saw an Irish invasion with acts like B*Witched

0:19:19 > 0:19:21and The Corrs topping the charts.

0:19:21 > 0:19:25But their success was overshadowed by the launch of a true pop phenomenon.

0:19:25 > 0:19:30They're pretty good, like, they're new. I don't know much of their stuff, so they're quite good.

0:19:30 > 0:19:33They've good voices and they're gorgeous!

0:19:33 > 0:19:36So much better than Boyzone, I think.

0:19:36 > 0:19:39MUSIC: "I'm Never Gonna Say Goodbye" by Westlife

0:19:39 > 0:19:44Yes, 1998 saw the arrival of a new way of life - Westlife.

0:19:44 > 0:19:48- Could you have imagined a year ago, what would have happened, you know, at this time?- No, not at all.

0:19:48 > 0:19:51This time last year, I was working at McDonald's.

0:19:51 > 0:19:54It will probably remain a mystery exactly how Louis Walsh

0:19:54 > 0:19:57came up with the idea of an Irish all-male vocal harmony group.

0:19:57 > 0:20:02Meanwhile, Irish all-male vocal harmony group Boyzone were at the peak of their powers.

0:20:02 > 0:20:04- It's Boyzone!- Boyzone!

0:20:04 > 0:20:05Boyzone!

0:20:05 > 0:20:08- Boyzone! Let's hear it. - Give it up for Boyzone!- Thank you!

0:20:08 > 0:20:09Best haircut.

0:20:09 > 0:20:11- Best dressed male. - Best dressed person.

0:20:11 > 0:20:13- Best single. - Most fanciable male.

0:20:13 > 0:20:16The most fanciable person. Best band in the universe.

0:20:16 > 0:20:20MUSIC: "No Matter What" by Boyzone

0:20:20 > 0:20:251998 saw Boyzone boasting two chart-topping singles

0:20:25 > 0:20:27and a Number 1 album.

0:20:27 > 0:20:30Buzzcocks was keen to join in with the craic

0:20:30 > 0:20:34and scored a coup by booking the band's third most famous member.

0:20:34 > 0:20:37You just do the dancing at the back, I'll do the whole song.

0:20:37 > 0:20:39LAUGHTER

0:20:39 > 0:20:41Two, three, four...

0:20:41 > 0:20:45# Doo-doo, doo-doo, doo-doo, doo-doo, doo-doo...

0:20:45 > 0:20:48# Doo! Er-er, er-ow...

0:20:48 > 0:20:50# Doo-doo, doo-doo, doo-doo, doo-doo...

0:20:50 > 0:20:52We are doing these so bad

0:20:52 > 0:20:55so that team doesn't get any of the points either.

0:20:55 > 0:20:57Clever thinking! Clever thinking!

0:20:57 > 0:21:01# Doo-doo, doo-doo Whee, wah-dada-da-dah! Ha-ha-ha-ha!

0:21:01 > 0:21:05# Brr-uh, dah, da-da, da-da Wha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

0:21:05 > 0:21:07# Yip! Woo-pa ba-ta!

0:21:09 > 0:21:11APPLAUSE

0:21:15 > 0:21:18Was that all three songs, there, in one?

0:21:18 > 0:21:20Now let's hear it properly.

0:21:20 > 0:21:21ELECTRIC GUITAR

0:21:21 > 0:21:24- This is good!- That's how it should sound.- This is excellent.

0:21:25 > 0:21:27It was Girls And Boys by Blur.

0:21:28 > 0:21:30Ireland's finest -

0:21:30 > 0:21:34Norton, Hughes and Duffy - murdering a modern day classic.

0:21:34 > 0:21:35And to make matters worse,

0:21:35 > 0:21:38apparently, after the show, Louis Walsh signed them.

0:21:38 > 0:21:42Can I just say, working musician - you make a living doing this?!

0:21:42 > 0:21:46Buzzcocks set out to explore Boyzone's beginnings

0:21:46 > 0:21:49and where better to start than their infamous debut.

0:21:49 > 0:21:53For the audience only, here are Boyzone.

0:21:53 > 0:21:57# Come and light my fire

0:21:59 > 0:22:02# Light my fire

0:22:10 > 0:22:13# Light my fire... #

0:22:16 > 0:22:18Boyzone freestyling on Ireland's Late Late Show

0:22:18 > 0:22:21but can you tell me which of our line-up is original band member

0:22:21 > 0:22:25Richard Rock who didn't come into the final band, so left with dignity.

0:22:27 > 0:22:32So, is number one Boyzone or is it number two, erogenous zone,

0:22:32 > 0:22:35or is it number three, hydrocorti-zone...

0:22:35 > 0:22:37LAUGHTER

0:22:37 > 0:22:41Is it number four, woman's...Own...

0:22:41 > 0:22:43or is it number five, lives on his...

0:22:43 > 0:22:45LAUGHTER

0:22:45 > 0:22:47..own?

0:22:49 > 0:22:51- It has to be either one or two. - What?

0:22:51 > 0:22:56Well, if I was Louis Walsh and I was doing a boy band...

0:22:56 > 0:22:59- or... Let me rephrase that! - LAUGHTER

0:23:03 > 0:23:05- Slight slip of the tongue there. - Hold on!

0:23:05 > 0:23:07LAUGHTER

0:23:07 > 0:23:10I think it's number three. I think it is number three.

0:23:10 > 0:23:12- Three?- Yeah, I think it is. - Let's find out if he's right.

0:23:12 > 0:23:16Would Richard Rock please make himself known. Of course, it was. Well done.

0:23:16 > 0:23:17APPLAUSE

0:23:19 > 0:23:20Richard, I'd like to...

0:23:20 > 0:23:22I don't normally do this when we have the line-up.

0:23:22 > 0:23:25I'd like to congratulate you for not being in Boyzone.

0:23:25 > 0:23:27LAUGHTER Having said that...

0:23:30 > 0:23:33..I'd also like to congratulate you four, for the same reason.

0:23:33 > 0:23:36One man who did end up in the band would firmly establish himself

0:23:36 > 0:23:39as one of Buzzcocks' favourite sons.

0:23:40 > 0:23:42# ..Slow and easy

0:23:42 > 0:23:45A man who is to talent what elves are to be triple jump.

0:23:45 > 0:23:47LAUGHTER

0:23:47 > 0:23:51The musical equivalent of a Boxing Day floater,

0:23:51 > 0:23:53Ronan 'Christ On A Bike' Keating.

0:23:53 > 0:23:58# ..the way you love me... #

0:23:58 > 0:24:01Ronan Keating, there, with I Love The Way You Love Me.

0:24:01 > 0:24:04- When we were watching the video, there, Kate went, "Ah."- I like it.

0:24:04 > 0:24:05I like him. He's a lovely boy.

0:24:05 > 0:24:09- But he can't sing, can he? - I don't know.

0:24:09 > 0:24:12There you go. LAUGHTER

0:24:12 > 0:24:13David, can he sing?

0:24:13 > 0:24:16People who like this kind of thing find it the kind of thing they like.

0:24:16 > 0:24:18- There you go. - That means it's rubbish!

0:24:18 > 0:24:20LAUGHTER

0:24:20 > 0:24:23- So, let's have a look at this thing. - Good Lord!

0:24:23 > 0:24:26See, that's about the position he had in the audition, isn't it?

0:24:26 > 0:24:27LAUGHTER

0:24:27 > 0:24:31- IRISH ACCENT:- "I'm saluting a little imaginary leprechaun soldier."

0:24:31 > 0:24:33LAUGHTER

0:24:33 > 0:24:35Do you think that's the only two left of Boyzone

0:24:35 > 0:24:37that can still ride in the back of cabs?

0:24:37 > 0:24:38- All the rest are driving now.- Yeah.

0:24:38 > 0:24:41- GROANING - It's true!

0:24:41 > 0:24:43I'm not... I said I like them, don't turn on me.

0:24:43 > 0:24:46I tell you what, if I was a cab driver they'd both be in the boot.

0:24:46 > 0:24:48LAUGHTER

0:24:48 > 0:24:51Or bouncing off my bonnet very quickly! LAUGHTER

0:24:53 > 0:24:56As Ronan embarked on his solo adventure,

0:24:56 > 0:24:58Buzzcocks decided to ease off a little.

0:24:58 > 0:25:04Goat-voiced, weasel-faced Ronan 'Back Of A Spoon' Keating.

0:25:04 > 0:25:07So, you've both probably got to pretend

0:25:07 > 0:25:09that you're really big fans of Ronan Keating?

0:25:09 > 0:25:13- He's a good songwriter.- OK. Well, he's kept that hidden.

0:25:13 > 0:25:15LAUGHTER

0:25:16 > 0:25:19Ronan Keating's family say the worst thing about living with him

0:25:19 > 0:25:21is his constant flatulence.

0:25:21 > 0:25:23Although, in his defence, at least they are silent,

0:25:23 > 0:25:26cos he employs a professional backing farter to add the noise later.

0:25:26 > 0:25:28LAUGHTER

0:25:32 > 0:25:37The burning question of 1998 was Spice Girls or All Saints?

0:25:37 > 0:25:41'The gloves were off in the contest for best all-girl band.

0:25:41 > 0:25:46'Young pretenders All Saints snatched the best video awards for their hit

0:25:46 > 0:25:48'Never Ever away from the Spice Girls.'

0:25:48 > 0:25:51And on the 30th December, 1998,

0:25:51 > 0:25:54Buzzcocks decided to settle things once and for all

0:25:54 > 0:25:57by placing a member of each band on opposing teams -

0:25:57 > 0:26:01and seeing who was best at the all-important Next Lines round.

0:26:01 > 0:26:03The final round is, as always, Next Lines.

0:26:03 > 0:26:06I say a line, you tell me the next one. Phil's team starts first.

0:26:06 > 0:26:09You have 90 seconds. It starts now. "This year I'm off to sunny Spain."

0:26:09 > 0:26:11- "Viva Espana."- Yeah.

0:26:11 > 0:26:14- "Wella, wella, wella, ooh." - # Tell me more, tell me more... #

0:26:14 > 0:26:16Yeah, John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John.

0:26:16 > 0:26:17"He got friendly holding my hand."

0:26:17 > 0:26:19"We something down in the sand."

0:26:19 > 0:26:22I need more than, "something," obviously.

0:26:22 > 0:26:25It was, "She got friendly, down in the sand." Summer Nights, same.

0:26:25 > 0:26:27"Swing it, shake it, move it, make it."

0:26:27 > 0:26:28"Who do you think you are?"

0:26:28 > 0:26:31Look at him - blank face. LAUGHTER

0:26:32 > 0:26:34"That wasn't a hit, was it?"

0:26:34 > 0:26:36"Trust it, use it, prove it, groove it."

0:26:36 > 0:26:38- "Pixies and elves..." - "Show me how good you are."

0:26:38 > 0:26:40Show me how good you are, the Spice Girls. Well done.

0:26:40 > 0:26:42- Thank you. - LAUGHTER

0:26:42 > 0:26:45- "Aga-doo-doo-doo-doo." - "Push pineapple, shake the tree."

0:26:45 > 0:26:49Yeah... SLIDE GUITAR CHORD PLAYING

0:26:49 > 0:26:52End of the round. Sean's team, and your 90 seconds starts now.

0:26:52 > 0:26:54- "Stick them up, punk." - "It's the Fun Lovin' Criminals."

0:26:54 > 0:26:56Yeah, Fun Lovin' Criminals.

0:26:58 > 0:27:02"Sometimes vocabulary runs right through my head."

0:27:02 > 0:27:03"Sometimes vocabulary..."

0:27:03 > 0:27:06- # Sometimes vocabulary runs through my... #- Yeah?

0:27:06 > 0:27:08"The alphabet runs right from A to Z."

0:27:08 > 0:27:10You said it wrong. You confused me. Sorry.

0:27:10 > 0:27:12What bit did I say wrong? You repeated it exactly as I said it.

0:27:12 > 0:27:14I wasn't used to it like that.

0:27:14 > 0:27:16"Sometimes vocabulary runs right through my head."

0:27:16 > 0:27:18Not, "right," it's, "through my head."

0:27:18 > 0:27:20# The alphabet runs right from A to Z.

0:27:20 > 0:27:23I can only accept what's on the card. I'm sorry, you don't get a point.

0:27:23 > 0:27:25LAUGHTER

0:27:26 > 0:27:27"Down at the Copa."

0:27:27 > 0:27:29- # Copacabana. # - Yeah, Barry Manilow.

0:27:29 > 0:27:31"In the summertime, when the weather is fine."

0:27:31 > 0:27:34"Ooh-uh! Choo-choo. Ugh!"

0:27:34 > 0:27:37Please, don't, I've nearly finished work, I want to concentrate.

0:27:37 > 0:27:39"Yada, yada, yada, bottle of wine."

0:27:39 > 0:27:42LAUGHTER

0:27:42 > 0:27:44APPLAUSE

0:27:46 > 0:27:49"You are the Sunshine of my life."

0:27:49 > 0:27:51# And I will always be around. #

0:27:51 > 0:27:53SLIDE GUITAR CHORD PLAYING

0:27:55 > 0:27:58- Quite right. Stevie Wonder, Sunshine Of My Life.- Yay!

0:27:58 > 0:28:02So 1998 became a big year in Spice Girls history.

0:28:02 > 0:28:07They may have lost Geri but they won the Next Lines round.

0:28:07 > 0:28:10Well, there it is, 1998 in a Buzzcocks' nutshell

0:28:10 > 0:28:12and the eagle-eyed amongst you

0:28:12 > 0:28:14may have spotted the following people, starting with -

0:28:14 > 0:28:18Ben from Curiosity Killed the Cat, Davina McCall, Richard Herring,

0:28:18 > 0:28:21Katie Melua, Michelle Gayle, a very young Zoe Ball,

0:28:21 > 0:28:23Pop Idol Sarah Whatmore, Fearne Cotton,

0:28:23 > 0:28:27James Broad from Silver Sun, Terri Walker and Sarah from Dubstar.

0:28:27 > 0:28:30I've been Alex James, thank you, and good night.

0:28:54 > 0:28:57Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd