'The Beatles' Magical Mystery Tour

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0:00:02 > 0:00:04MUSIC: "Magical Mystery Tour" by The Beatles

0:00:04 > 0:00:09Roll up, roll up for the Magical Mystery Tour, step right this way!

0:00:09 > 0:00:15# Roll up, roll up For the Mystery Tour

0:00:15 > 0:00:21# Roll up, roll up For the Mystery Tour

0:00:21 > 0:00:22# Roll up...

0:00:22 > 0:00:24# And that's an invitation...

0:00:24 > 0:00:26# Roll up for the Mystery Tour

0:00:26 > 0:00:27# Roll up...

0:00:27 > 0:00:29# To make a reservation

0:00:29 > 0:00:32# Roll up for the Mystery Tour

0:00:32 > 0:00:38# The Magical Mystery Tour Is waiting to take you away

0:00:38 > 0:00:41# Waiting to take you away

0:00:41 > 0:00:46# Roll up, roll up For the Mystery Tour

0:00:46 > 0:00:52# Roll up, roll up For the Mystery Tour

0:00:52 > 0:00:53# Roll up...

0:00:53 > 0:00:55# We got everything you need

0:00:55 > 0:00:57# Roll up for the Mystery Tour

0:00:57 > 0:00:59# Roll up...

0:00:59 > 0:01:00# Satisfaction guaranteed

0:01:00 > 0:01:04# Roll up for the Mystery Tour

0:01:04 > 0:01:09# The Magical Mystery Tour Is hoping to take you away

0:01:09 > 0:01:12# Hoping to take you away... #

0:01:14 > 0:01:17When a man buys a ticket for a Magical Mystery Tour,

0:01:17 > 0:01:19he knows what to expect.

0:01:19 > 0:01:22We guarantee him the trip of a lifetime,

0:01:22 > 0:01:25and that's just what he gets.

0:01:25 > 0:01:28The incredible Magical Mystery Tour!

0:01:31 > 0:01:34# The Magical Mystery Tour

0:01:34 > 0:01:41# Roll up, roll up For the Mystery Tour

0:01:41 > 0:01:42# Roll up...

0:01:42 > 0:01:45# And that's an invitation...

0:01:45 > 0:01:49# Roll up for the Mystery Tour

0:01:49 > 0:01:50# Roll up...

0:01:50 > 0:01:53# To make a reservation

0:01:53 > 0:01:56# Roll up for the Mystery Tour

0:01:56 > 0:02:03# The Magical Mystery Tour Is coming to take you away

0:02:03 > 0:02:08# Coming to take you away

0:02:08 > 0:02:16# The Magical Mystery Tour Is dying to take you away

0:02:16 > 0:02:18# Dying to take you away

0:02:18 > 0:02:25# Take you today. #

0:02:33 > 0:02:35Ceaseless nagging!

0:02:35 > 0:02:39- Come on, we're going to be late. - I can't go any quicker!

0:02:39 > 0:02:41- Stop it!- Come on!

0:02:43 > 0:02:46Richard B Starkey and his Aunt Jessica are always arguing

0:02:46 > 0:02:48about one thing or another.

0:02:49 > 0:02:51Oh, I'm going!

0:02:51 > 0:02:52Oh, go! Go on!

0:02:52 > 0:02:55And with today being Sunday and the weather looking up,

0:02:55 > 0:02:58you'd think they'd have given it a rest.

0:02:58 > 0:03:00For goodness' sake, would you stop that sitting down!

0:03:00 > 0:03:02All right, all right, what's your hurry?

0:03:02 > 0:03:04But no, on and on they go.

0:03:06 > 0:03:08- "Good morning."- Said Richard.

0:03:08 > 0:03:11"Good afternoon, sir," said the courier.

0:03:11 > 0:03:12They were late.

0:03:12 > 0:03:15'Allo, Flo, you all right, girl? I'll sit here.

0:03:15 > 0:03:16Yes, I'll have the window seat.

0:03:16 > 0:03:19All right, so you'll have the window seat!

0:03:22 > 0:03:25Good morning, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls.

0:03:25 > 0:03:28Welcome to Magical Mystery Tours!

0:03:30 > 0:03:34I am your courier, Jolly Jimmy Johnson!

0:03:34 > 0:03:37All my friends call me Jolly Jimmy and you are all my friends!

0:03:37 > 0:03:41Over here is your hostess, that lovely, delightful, delectable...

0:03:41 > 0:03:42Wendy Winters!

0:03:42 > 0:03:44Oh, lovely! I love it!

0:03:44 > 0:03:46And over here, our driver for the trip,

0:03:46 > 0:03:47that wonderful driver, we hope...

0:03:47 > 0:03:49HE CHUCKLES

0:03:49 > 0:03:50..Alf!

0:03:50 > 0:03:52Off you go, Alf! Here we go now.

0:03:52 > 0:03:55Splendid! Fasten your safety belts, please. Away-way-way we go!

0:03:55 > 0:03:57HE CHUCKLES

0:03:59 > 0:04:01Away we go, Alf, splendid!

0:04:01 > 0:04:03Very comfy in the back there, is it?

0:04:03 > 0:04:04Lovely. I say it's lovely.

0:04:04 > 0:04:06Oh! Get your popcorn out!

0:04:06 > 0:04:07HE LAUGHS

0:04:07 > 0:04:10Right hand down. There we are, splendid.

0:04:10 > 0:04:12And away we go.

0:04:12 > 0:04:15Anyway, I'll tell you something, you ain't coming away with me any more.

0:04:15 > 0:04:18Who bought the tickets for this trip? I did.

0:04:18 > 0:04:19Yeah, with my money.

0:04:19 > 0:04:23I bought them, right? I'm taking you out, you're not taking me anywhere.

0:04:23 > 0:04:25- I gave you the money, darling. - Remember that.

0:04:25 > 0:04:28And you've done nothing but eye all the fellas on the coach since we got here.

0:04:28 > 0:04:29Shut your...!

0:04:29 > 0:04:32I dunno, since Uncle Jack died, you've never been the same.

0:04:32 > 0:04:34Well, of course I ain't, cos I ain't got Uncle Jack, have I?

0:04:34 > 0:04:38- I remember him.- So I've got to get somebody else, haven't I? - I remember him.

0:04:38 > 0:04:40If I ain't got him, I've got to get somebody else, haven't I?

0:04:40 > 0:04:43- I don't know.- You should know, you're old enough at 21!

0:04:43 > 0:04:45You should do a bit of knitting. Do you good.

0:04:45 > 0:04:49Who for? You? Should I knit for you?

0:04:49 > 0:04:50No, don't knit for me.

0:04:53 > 0:04:55CAR HORN HONKS

0:04:57 > 0:04:59Who is that man?

0:05:01 > 0:05:03Oh, that's Mr Bloodvessel.

0:05:03 > 0:05:07He's quite harmless, he comes on all the trips. He thinks he's a courier.

0:05:07 > 0:05:08HE CHUCKLES

0:05:08 > 0:05:11Last trip, he thought he was the driver.

0:05:12 > 0:05:14Well, you know, when I saw your first film,

0:05:14 > 0:05:17I really thought you had something.

0:05:17 > 0:05:20- But it was...- I was only about six then.

0:05:20 > 0:05:24Wasn't it Blue Lady? Lady In Blue? Something like that.

0:05:24 > 0:05:28- How old are you?- Myself, I'm 30.

0:05:28 > 0:05:31But I look a little younger due to the Fair Isle sweater which...

0:05:31 > 0:05:36- Excuse me, sir.- Yes? - I'd like to take a photograph of the young lady. Do you mind?

0:05:36 > 0:05:38I don't mind if Miss Gabriella doesn't.

0:05:38 > 0:05:39Well, Miss Gabriella doesn't mind.

0:05:39 > 0:05:43- You don't.- Thank you. Bye-bye, see you later, maybe.

0:05:43 > 0:05:46Oh, we won't see him later. Can I have you up there?

0:05:49 > 0:05:50All right?

0:05:52 > 0:05:54Oh! My lucky day!

0:05:54 > 0:05:57MUSIC: "The Fool on the Hill" by The Beatles

0:05:57 > 0:06:00# Day after day

0:06:00 > 0:06:04# Alone on a hill

0:06:04 > 0:06:11# The man with the foolish grin Is keeping perfectly still

0:06:11 > 0:06:14# But nobody wants to know him

0:06:14 > 0:06:18# They can see that he's just a fool

0:06:18 > 0:06:20# And he never gives an answer

0:06:20 > 0:06:23# But the fool on the hill

0:06:23 > 0:06:27# Sees the sun going down

0:06:27 > 0:06:30# And the eyes in his head

0:06:30 > 0:06:35# See the world spinning round

0:06:38 > 0:06:41# Well on the way

0:06:41 > 0:06:44# Head in a cloud

0:06:44 > 0:06:51# The man of a thousand voices Talking perfectly loud

0:06:51 > 0:06:54# But nobody ever hears him

0:06:54 > 0:06:58# Or the sound he appears to make

0:06:58 > 0:07:00# And he never seems to notice

0:07:00 > 0:07:03# But the fool on the hill

0:07:03 > 0:07:07# Sees the sun going down

0:07:07 > 0:07:10# And the eyes in his head

0:07:10 > 0:07:14# See the world spinning round

0:07:31 > 0:07:33# And nobody seems to like him

0:07:33 > 0:07:37# They can tell what he wants to do

0:07:37 > 0:07:40# And he never shows his feelings

0:07:40 > 0:07:43# But the fool on the hill

0:07:43 > 0:07:46# Sees the sun going down

0:07:46 > 0:07:49# And the eyes in his head

0:07:49 > 0:07:55# See the world spinning round

0:07:56 > 0:08:02# Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh!

0:08:04 > 0:08:10# Round and round and round And round and round

0:08:10 > 0:08:13# And he never listens to them

0:08:13 > 0:08:18# He knows that they're the fools

0:08:18 > 0:08:20# They don't like him

0:08:20 > 0:08:22# The fool on the hill

0:08:22 > 0:08:26# Sees the sun going down

0:08:26 > 0:08:29# And the eyes in his head

0:08:29 > 0:08:34# See the world spinning round

0:08:37 > 0:08:39# Ooh!

0:08:39 > 0:08:43# Round and round and round and round

0:08:43 > 0:08:46# Ooh! #

0:08:50 > 0:08:52Good morning, lads and lasses.

0:08:52 > 0:08:55My name is Miss Winters.

0:08:55 > 0:09:00ALL: Good morning, Miss Winters, Miss Winters, Miss Winters!

0:09:00 > 0:09:04Yes, but I just wanted to say if there's anything I can do for you,

0:09:04 > 0:09:06you know what to do.

0:09:07 > 0:09:10We, at Magical Mysteries, only have your best interests at heart

0:09:10 > 0:09:13and your every wish is our command.

0:09:13 > 0:09:15Thank you.

0:09:44 > 0:09:47As the bus leaves the town behind and heads for the country,

0:09:47 > 0:09:48everything begins to change.

0:09:50 > 0:09:52Well, almost everything.

0:10:02 > 0:10:05And already the magic is beginning to work.

0:10:12 > 0:10:16TRUMPET PLAYS MILITARY TUNE

0:10:17 > 0:10:21COMEDY POSH GARBLED ACCENT

0:10:24 > 0:10:27HE CLEARS HIS THROAT

0:10:27 > 0:10:31COMEDY POSH GARBLED ACCENT

0:10:31 > 0:10:33HE CHUCKLES

0:10:33 > 0:10:34HE CHUCKLES TOO

0:10:34 > 0:10:36Jolly good!

0:10:39 > 0:10:41PEOPLE APPROACHING

0:10:41 > 0:10:47COMEDY POSH GARBLED ACCENT

0:10:54 > 0:10:56HE SHOUTS AT THEM

0:10:56 > 0:11:00COMEDY POSH GARBLED ACCENT

0:11:04 > 0:11:08COMEDY POSH GARBLED ACCENT

0:11:29 > 0:11:32COMEDY POSH GARBLED ACCENT CONTINUES

0:11:32 > 0:11:33Why?

0:11:34 > 0:11:37- Why?- Why?

0:11:37 > 0:11:44COMEDY POSH GARBLED ACCENT

0:11:44 > 0:11:48And get your bloody hair cut!

0:11:49 > 0:11:52MUSIC: BULLFIGHTING PASO DOBLE

0:11:52 > 0:11:57COMEDY POSH GARBLED ACCENT

0:12:20 > 0:12:22IMAGINARY AUDIENCE: Ole!

0:12:22 > 0:12:26COMEDY POSH GARBLED ACCENT

0:12:26 > 0:12:29IMAGINARY AUDIENCE: Ole!

0:12:29 > 0:12:30Ole! Ole! Ole!

0:12:30 > 0:12:31IMAGINARY AUDIENCE: Ole!

0:12:31 > 0:12:35COMEDY POSH GARBLED ACCENT

0:12:35 > 0:12:36HE MOANS

0:12:36 > 0:12:38IMAGINARY AUDIENCE: Ole!

0:12:38 > 0:12:39CHEERING

0:12:39 > 0:12:41Jolly good, Sarge, carry on.

0:12:44 > 0:12:47TRUMPET PLAYS MILITARY TUNE

0:12:50 > 0:12:54CARNIVAL-STYLE ORGAN PLAYS "She Loves You" by The Beatles

0:14:02 > 0:14:05On your marks!

0:14:05 > 0:14:07Get set!

0:14:07 > 0:14:08Go!

0:14:08 > 0:14:09GUNSHOT

0:14:51 > 0:14:52BICYCLE BELL RINGS

0:15:25 > 0:15:27Second gear! Come on!

0:15:38 > 0:15:40Who's getting in that car?

0:15:40 > 0:15:42Who is it?

0:15:42 > 0:15:43Ah! Oh!

0:15:46 > 0:15:47Come on, come on.

0:15:47 > 0:15:50We've got to win those with the bikes! Stop it!

0:15:50 > 0:15:53Out of the road, you stupid... He's picking the vicars up!

0:15:53 > 0:15:54Come on!

0:15:54 > 0:15:56Hold on, we've got 'em now, folks!

0:17:00 > 0:17:05CHEERING

0:17:07 > 0:17:10SHOUTING

0:17:45 > 0:17:48If you look to your left, ladies and gentlemen,

0:17:48 > 0:17:51the view is not very inspiring.

0:17:51 > 0:17:54Ah! But if you look to your right...

0:17:54 > 0:17:58MUSIC: "Flying" by The Beatles

0:18:56 > 0:19:01# La-la-la-la-la

0:19:01 > 0:19:06# La-la-la-la-ra-la

0:19:06 > 0:19:12# La-la-la-la-la

0:19:12 > 0:19:16# La-la-la-la-la

0:19:16 > 0:19:22# Oooh! #

0:19:44 > 0:19:48Beyond the blue horizon, far above the clouds,

0:19:48 > 0:19:50in a land that no-one knows,

0:19:50 > 0:19:52live four or five magicians

0:19:52 > 0:19:56who spend their days casting wonderful spells.

0:19:56 > 0:19:59Come with me now into that secret place

0:19:59 > 0:20:02where the eyes of man have never set foot.

0:20:18 > 0:20:19Where's the bus?

0:20:21 > 0:20:22Mmm.

0:20:30 > 0:20:32Where's the bus?

0:20:32 > 0:20:33Shh!

0:20:40 > 0:20:41Where's the bus?

0:20:43 > 0:20:45It's coming!

0:20:47 > 0:20:49- STICK SMACKS - Where's the bus?!

0:20:50 > 0:20:52The bus?

0:20:57 > 0:21:00The bus is ten miles north on the Dewsbury road.

0:21:02 > 0:21:04It's only ten miles away.

0:21:04 > 0:21:06Oh! Ten miles!

0:21:06 > 0:21:11Soon be here. Ten miles away, ten miles away, ten miles away!

0:21:15 > 0:21:17Oh, ladies and gentlemen, quickly, look to your left!

0:21:17 > 0:21:20Now, there you see the ancient Roman ruins.

0:21:20 > 0:21:23Now, they really have been there an awful long time.

0:21:23 > 0:21:26They are, in fact, a little difficult to see,

0:21:26 > 0:21:28because they're almost flattened to the ground...

0:21:28 > 0:21:31Meanwhile, back on the bus, things are happening

0:21:31 > 0:21:34and life lobbles on.

0:21:34 > 0:21:36Indeed, the magic is so powerful

0:21:36 > 0:21:38that even Mr Bloodvessel emerges from his shell.

0:21:38 > 0:21:40He turns to speak.

0:21:40 > 0:21:44If I may take the liberty, mister.

0:21:44 > 0:21:45- Be my guest.- Give over!

0:21:49 > 0:21:50My dear lady...

0:21:52 > 0:21:56My dear lady, doesn't intuition tell you what I feel?

0:21:57 > 0:21:59Don't interrupt.

0:22:00 > 0:22:01You bring out my...

0:22:06 > 0:22:08I...

0:22:08 > 0:22:09love you!

0:22:09 > 0:22:10HE CHUCKLES

0:22:10 > 0:22:16ORCHESTRA PLAYS "All My Loving" by The Beatles

0:22:56 > 0:22:58Love you! Love you!

0:24:26 > 0:24:28I am the courier.

0:24:29 > 0:24:31Good morning, men...

0:24:31 > 0:24:33and women.

0:24:34 > 0:24:35Welcome.

0:24:37 > 0:24:39I am your friendly courier.

0:24:39 > 0:24:41HE WHISTLES

0:24:41 > 0:24:43Mr Bloodvessel is my name.

0:24:44 > 0:24:47Buster Bloodvessel.

0:24:48 > 0:24:54I am concerned for you to enjoy yourselves

0:24:54 > 0:24:56within the limits of British decency.

0:24:58 > 0:25:00You know what I mean, don't you?

0:25:02 > 0:25:04Well? Don't you?

0:25:04 > 0:25:07ALL: Yes, Mr Bloodvessel.

0:25:07 > 0:25:11MUSIC: "I Am The Walrus" by The Beatles

0:25:27 > 0:25:30# I am he as you are he

0:25:30 > 0:25:36# As you are me And we are all together

0:25:36 > 0:25:39# See how they run Like pigs from a gun

0:25:39 > 0:25:41# See how they fly

0:25:41 > 0:25:43# I'm crying

0:25:45 > 0:25:49# Sitting on a cornflake

0:25:49 > 0:25:53# Waiting for the van to come

0:25:53 > 0:25:55# Corporation T-shirt

0:25:55 > 0:25:56# Stupid bloody Tuesday

0:25:56 > 0:25:58# Man, you been a naughty boy

0:25:58 > 0:26:01# You let your face grow long

0:26:01 > 0:26:03# I am the eggman

0:26:03 > 0:26:04# Ooh!

0:26:04 > 0:26:06# They are the eggmen

0:26:06 > 0:26:07# Ooh!

0:26:07 > 0:26:08# I am the walrus

0:26:08 > 0:26:10# Goo goo g'joob

0:26:10 > 0:26:13# Mr city policeman sitting

0:26:13 > 0:26:19# Pretty little policemen in a row

0:26:19 > 0:26:21# See how they fly Like Lucy In The Sky

0:26:21 > 0:26:24# See how they run

0:26:24 > 0:26:27# I'm crying

0:26:27 > 0:26:33# I'm cry-ying

0:26:33 > 0:26:35# I'm crying

0:26:35 > 0:26:41# I'm cry-ying

0:26:41 > 0:26:45# Yellow matter custard

0:26:45 > 0:26:50# Dripping from a dead dog's eye

0:26:50 > 0:26:52# Crabalocker fishwife Pornographic priestess

0:26:52 > 0:26:54# Boy, you been a naughty girl

0:26:54 > 0:26:57# You let your knickers down

0:26:57 > 0:26:59# I am the eggman

0:26:59 > 0:27:01# Ooh!

0:27:01 > 0:27:02# They are the eggmen

0:27:02 > 0:27:03# Ooh!

0:27:03 > 0:27:05# I am the walrus

0:27:05 > 0:27:07# Goo goo g'joob

0:27:18 > 0:27:21# Sitting in an English garden

0:27:21 > 0:27:25# Waiting for the sun

0:27:25 > 0:27:27# If the sun don't come

0:27:27 > 0:27:31# You get a tan from standing In the English rain

0:27:31 > 0:27:34# I am the eggman

0:27:34 > 0:27:36# They are the eggmen

0:27:36 > 0:27:38# I am the walrus

0:27:38 > 0:27:43# Goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob

0:27:43 > 0:27:45# Expert textpert choking smokers

0:27:45 > 0:27:49# Don't you think the joker Laughs at you? #

0:27:49 > 0:27:51LAUGHTER

0:27:51 > 0:27:54# See how they smile Like pigs in a sty

0:27:54 > 0:27:56# See how they snied

0:27:56 > 0:27:59# I'm crying

0:27:59 > 0:28:04# Semolina pilchard

0:28:04 > 0:28:08# Climbing up the Eiffel Tower

0:28:08 > 0:28:11# Elementary penguin Singing Hari Krishna

0:28:11 > 0:28:15# Man, you should have seen them Kicking Edgar Allan Poe

0:28:15 > 0:28:17# I am the eggman

0:28:17 > 0:28:18# Ooh!

0:28:18 > 0:28:20# They are the eggmen

0:28:20 > 0:28:21# Ooh!

0:28:21 > 0:28:22# I am the walrus

0:28:22 > 0:28:27# Goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob

0:28:27 > 0:28:30# Goo goo g'joob g'goo goo G'joob g'goo. #

0:29:40 > 0:29:42What about five little dickie birds sitting on your head?

0:29:42 > 0:29:43CHILD LAUGHS

0:29:43 > 0:29:45One named Charlie and one named Fred.

0:29:45 > 0:29:47- Yes.- Do that one, then.

0:29:47 > 0:29:49- You do it with me.- OK.

0:29:49 > 0:29:53Five little dickie birds sitting on your head,

0:29:53 > 0:29:55one named...

0:29:55 > 0:29:58Charlie, Charlie, Charlie, Charlie, whoops! Charlie, whoops!

0:29:58 > 0:30:00Charlie, Charlie, Charlie, Charlie!

0:30:00 > 0:30:02Can you do that one?

0:30:02 > 0:30:03- SHE CHUCKLES - No.

0:30:03 > 0:30:05HE CHUCKLES Yes.

0:30:05 > 0:30:06- No!- Yes.- No!

0:30:06 > 0:30:08- Yes.- No.

0:30:08 > 0:30:10I've got a present for you. Do you know what it is?

0:30:10 > 0:30:13- No.- Have a guess.- No!

0:30:13 > 0:30:14- Go on, have a guess.- No.

0:30:14 > 0:30:16- Have a guess!- No!

0:30:16 > 0:30:18- Have a guess!- No-o!

0:30:19 > 0:30:21Well, you're going to get it, anyway.

0:30:21 > 0:30:23SHE CHUCKLES

0:30:24 > 0:30:25What's that?

0:30:25 > 0:30:26Wait a mo, wait a mo.

0:30:28 > 0:30:31- Do you want to blow it?- No.

0:30:31 > 0:30:33CHEERING

0:30:33 > 0:30:35HE CHUCKLES

0:30:37 > 0:30:40All right, should we give it to George?

0:30:40 > 0:30:42Yeah.

0:30:42 > 0:30:43There you are, George.

0:30:43 > 0:30:44Thank you.

0:30:46 > 0:30:48George, George, George, George, oops!

0:30:48 > 0:30:52George, oops! George, George, George, George...

0:30:52 > 0:30:55Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention, please?

0:30:55 > 0:31:00Our estimated time of arrival for luncheon is approximately 1.15.

0:31:00 > 0:31:02Thank you.

0:31:02 > 0:31:03Now, shut up!

0:31:03 > 0:31:06Shut up to me?! I've had enough of it!

0:31:06 > 0:31:09I can't stand it any more! I'm getting off! Off!

0:31:09 > 0:31:10SHE LAUGHS

0:31:10 > 0:31:12Don't get historical!

0:31:27 > 0:31:29Aunt Jessie's hungry.

0:31:31 > 0:31:32And she's dreaming.

0:31:32 > 0:31:33SHE CHUCKLES

0:31:33 > 0:31:36She's dreaming about food...

0:31:36 > 0:31:39Food... Food...

0:31:39 > 0:31:41Beautiful food.

0:31:41 > 0:31:43Oh, lettuce!

0:31:43 > 0:31:45Oh, potatoes!

0:31:45 > 0:31:48Oh, apples!

0:31:48 > 0:31:51MUSIC: "Jessie's Dream" by The Beatles

0:32:08 > 0:32:10SHE SOBS

0:32:36 > 0:32:39HE HUMS

0:32:47 > 0:32:48This time I mean it!

0:32:50 > 0:32:52SHE SOBS

0:32:52 > 0:32:54I can't breathe any more. It's too much.

0:33:08 > 0:33:12All this...mud! In 45 minutes!

0:33:12 > 0:33:14I can hardly get my breath!

0:33:16 > 0:33:21It's intake, Jessie, not output.

0:33:21 > 0:33:24I am, I am!

0:33:24 > 0:33:25I am already!

0:33:25 > 0:33:28Three times this week already!

0:33:28 > 0:33:32For goodness' sake, Jessie, sit down.

0:33:32 > 0:33:33Remember!

0:33:36 > 0:33:38I don't care!

0:33:38 > 0:33:40This is the way he would have wanted it.

0:33:40 > 0:33:43SHE SOBS

0:34:09 > 0:34:11Pirandello!

0:34:11 > 0:34:12Help me up the stairs!

0:34:12 > 0:34:14Yes, lady.

0:34:21 > 0:34:22MALE CHOIR HUMS

0:34:49 > 0:34:51Lovely, lovely...

0:34:51 > 0:34:53To get a themed night, yes...

0:34:53 > 0:34:56We should go for that one, yes, it'll be lovely.

0:34:56 > 0:34:57SHE LAUGHS

0:34:57 > 0:34:58Lovely...

0:35:00 > 0:35:01Wake up, Jessie.

0:35:03 > 0:35:04GUNSHOTS

0:35:09 > 0:35:12THEY SING

0:35:16 > 0:35:19# There's no business Like show business

0:35:19 > 0:35:21# There's no business I know. #

0:35:21 > 0:35:24Everything about it is so appealing.

0:35:26 > 0:35:27Let's go on with show.

0:35:27 > 0:35:29HE CHUCKLES

0:35:35 > 0:35:36Here we go!

0:35:36 > 0:35:38- Here we are.- Come on with me!

0:35:47 > 0:35:49FAIRGROUND MUSIC PLAYS

0:36:02 > 0:36:04Ta-da!

0:36:04 > 0:36:05HE CHUCKLES

0:36:05 > 0:36:06Here we are again!

0:36:06 > 0:36:09Everybody up and quickly in your seats.

0:36:10 > 0:36:13Everybody sit down...

0:36:19 > 0:36:23CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:36:23 > 0:36:26ALL: Go on, Jimmy!

0:36:27 > 0:36:28HE WHISTLES

0:36:33 > 0:36:34HE WHISTLES

0:36:37 > 0:36:40CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:36:40 > 0:36:42HE LAUGHS

0:36:42 > 0:36:43Go on, Jimmy!

0:36:48 > 0:36:50SHE LAUGHS

0:37:02 > 0:37:05MUSIC: "Blue Jay Way" by The Beatles

0:37:16 > 0:37:21# There's a fog upon LA

0:37:21 > 0:37:22# Aah...

0:37:22 > 0:37:26# And my friends have lost their way

0:37:26 > 0:37:28# Aah...

0:37:28 > 0:37:32# "We'll be over soon," they said

0:37:32 > 0:37:34# Aah...

0:37:35 > 0:37:39# Now, they've lost themselves instead

0:37:42 > 0:37:48# Please don't be long

0:37:48 > 0:37:53# Please don't you be very long

0:37:53 > 0:37:56# Please don't be long

0:37:56 > 0:38:01# Or I may be asleep

0:38:03 > 0:38:08# Well, it only goes to show

0:38:08 > 0:38:13# And I told them where to go

0:38:13 > 0:38:19# Ask a policeman on the street

0:38:19 > 0:38:26# There's so many there to meet

0:38:26 > 0:38:30# Please don't be long

0:38:30 > 0:38:31# Don't be long

0:38:31 > 0:38:34# Please don't you be very long

0:38:34 > 0:38:36# Don't be long

0:38:36 > 0:38:39# Please don't be long

0:38:39 > 0:38:43# Or I may be asleep

0:38:45 > 0:38:48# Now, it's past my bed, I know

0:38:48 > 0:38:50# Ooh...

0:38:50 > 0:38:53# And I'd really like to go

0:38:53 > 0:38:55# Ooh...

0:38:55 > 0:38:58# Soon will be the break of day

0:38:58 > 0:39:00# Eh...

0:39:00 > 0:39:05# Sitting here in Blue Jay Way

0:39:05 > 0:39:08# Eh...

0:39:08 > 0:39:11# Please don't be long

0:39:11 > 0:39:13# Don't be long

0:39:13 > 0:39:16# Please don't you be very long

0:39:16 > 0:39:18# Don't be long

0:39:18 > 0:39:20# Please don't be long

0:39:20 > 0:39:25# Or I may be asleep

0:39:25 > 0:39:29# Please don't be long

0:39:29 > 0:39:35# Please don't you be very long

0:39:35 > 0:39:37# Please don't be long

0:39:43 > 0:39:47# Please don't be long

0:39:47 > 0:39:52# Please don't you be very long

0:39:52 > 0:39:54# Please don't be long

0:40:01 > 0:40:06# Please don't be long

0:40:06 > 0:40:10# Please don't you be very long

0:40:10 > 0:40:12# Please don't be long

0:40:15 > 0:40:18# Don't be long

0:40:18 > 0:40:21# Don't be long

0:40:21 > 0:40:25# Don't be long Don't be long

0:40:29 > 0:40:34# Don't be long Don't be long

0:40:34 > 0:40:36# Don't be long. #

0:40:45 > 0:40:49CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:41:07 > 0:41:09Well, well, well.

0:41:09 > 0:41:11They are a happy crowd.

0:41:11 > 0:41:12Go on.

0:41:12 > 0:41:16Come along, back on the bus. Come on.

0:41:16 > 0:41:18THEY SING

0:41:21 > 0:41:23Off we go!

0:41:27 > 0:41:31Ooh... Wonder what the magicians are cooking up now!

0:41:31 > 0:41:32Ready!

0:41:32 > 0:41:35BELL RINGS

0:41:35 > 0:41:38Tea up, fellas. Ooh!

0:41:38 > 0:41:41- Oh, goodie!- Talk about your magical mysteries,

0:41:41 > 0:41:43I've spent half an hour looking for that sugar!

0:41:43 > 0:41:45I tell you.

0:41:45 > 0:41:47I was half an hour looking for the sugar.

0:41:47 > 0:41:49Is there one for me?

0:41:49 > 0:41:50Aye, there's one over here, Richard.

0:41:50 > 0:41:52Oh, how are you, Bonzo?

0:41:52 > 0:41:55- All right? Any news of the bus?- The bus?

0:41:55 > 0:41:58It's ten miles north on the Dewsbury road.

0:41:58 > 0:42:01And they're having a lovely time.

0:42:01 > 0:42:06ALL: They're having a lovely time! They're having a lovely time!

0:42:06 > 0:42:09Can you tell me what's next on the agenda?

0:42:09 > 0:42:10A song.

0:42:10 > 0:42:14OPERATIC SINGING

0:42:14 > 0:42:18No! Not you... Them!

0:42:18 > 0:42:19On the bus!

0:42:21 > 0:42:25# I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts! #

0:42:25 > 0:42:27Have you, then? Ooh!

0:42:27 > 0:42:30# There they are All standing in a row! #

0:42:30 > 0:42:32Yeah, darling...

0:42:32 > 0:42:35Come on, join in. What's the matter with you?

0:42:35 > 0:42:38ACCORDION MUSIC PLAYING

0:42:38 > 0:42:40CHEERING

0:42:40 > 0:42:44ALL: # Toot Toot Tootsie, goodbye!

0:42:44 > 0:42:49# Toot Toot Tootsie, don't cry

0:42:49 > 0:42:54# That choo-choo train that takes me

0:42:54 > 0:42:57# Away from you...

0:42:57 > 0:42:59# La-la-la-la

0:42:59 > 0:43:02# Toot Toot Tootsie, goodbye! #

0:43:02 > 0:43:06# And as I go, I love to sing

0:43:06 > 0:43:09# My knapsack on my back

0:43:09 > 0:43:13# Val-deri, Val-dera

0:43:13 > 0:43:15# Valderi

0:43:15 > 0:43:17# Val-dera-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha... #

0:43:17 > 0:43:20# Are smiling

0:43:20 > 0:43:26# La-la-la-la

0:43:26 > 0:43:31# And when Irish eyes are smiling

0:43:31 > 0:43:38# La-la-la-la

0:43:38 > 0:43:44# When Irish eyes are smiling

0:43:44 > 0:43:50# La-la-la-la

0:43:50 > 0:43:57# And when Irish eyes Are smiling... #

0:43:57 > 0:44:05# No more sobbing when he starts Throbbing his old sweet song!

0:44:05 > 0:44:09# Wake up, wake up, you sleepyhead!

0:44:09 > 0:44:12# Get up, get up, get out of bed!

0:44:12 > 0:44:15# Cheer up, cheer up, the sky is red!

0:44:15 > 0:44:18# Live, love, laugh and be happy! #

0:44:18 > 0:44:23# La-la-la-la-la

0:44:23 > 0:44:27# La-la-la-la-la

0:44:27 > 0:44:30# La-la-la-la-la

0:44:30 > 0:44:32# La-la-la-la-la

0:44:32 > 0:44:36# La-la-la-la-la... #

0:44:36 > 0:44:40CANCAN MUSIC

0:44:51 > 0:44:53Ladies and gentlemen, when the coach stops,

0:44:53 > 0:44:57would the gentlemen please follow Mr Johnson

0:44:57 > 0:44:59and the ladies stay with me?

0:45:00 > 0:45:02Here we are now, off we go.

0:45:02 > 0:45:05In for a jolly evening with Jolly Jimmy.

0:45:05 > 0:45:07This way!

0:45:13 > 0:45:15Everybody comfortable?

0:45:19 > 0:45:21Come on, where are they?

0:45:21 > 0:45:25MUSIC: "Death Cab For Cutie" by The Bonzo Dog Doo-Dah Band

0:45:32 > 0:45:36# That night Cutie called a cab Oh-ho-ho!

0:45:36 > 0:45:39# Baby, don't do it

0:45:39 > 0:45:42# She left her East Side room So drab

0:45:42 > 0:45:44# Oh-ho-ho!

0:45:44 > 0:45:47# Baby, don't do it

0:45:47 > 0:45:51# She went out alone in town

0:45:51 > 0:45:55# Knowing it would make Her lover frown

0:45:55 > 0:46:01# Death cab for Cutie Death cab for Cutie

0:46:01 > 0:46:06# Someone's going to make you pay your fare. #

0:46:06 > 0:46:09CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:46:09 > 0:46:13# The cab was racing through the night

0:46:13 > 0:46:15# Oh-ho-ho!

0:46:15 > 0:46:18# Baby, don't do it

0:46:18 > 0:46:20# His eyes, they were keeping Cutie in sight

0:46:20 > 0:46:22# Oh-ho-ho!

0:46:22 > 0:46:25# Baby, don't do it

0:46:25 > 0:46:29# When he saw Cutie It gave him a thrill

0:46:29 > 0:46:34# Don't you know, baby Cabs can kill?

0:46:34 > 0:46:40# Death cab for Cutie Death cab for Cutie

0:46:40 > 0:46:45# Someone's going to make you pay your fare

0:46:48 > 0:46:52# Cutie, don't you play with fate

0:46:52 > 0:46:56# Don't you leave your love alone

0:46:56 > 0:47:00# If you go out on this date

0:47:00 > 0:47:04# His heart will turn to stone

0:47:04 > 0:47:07# Bad girl, Cutie, what have you done?

0:47:07 > 0:47:09# Oh-ho-ho!

0:47:09 > 0:47:11# Baby, don't do it

0:47:11 > 0:47:14# Slipping, sliding down On Highway 31

0:47:14 > 0:47:17# Mmm

0:47:17 > 0:47:19# Baby, don't do it

0:47:19 > 0:47:22# The traffic lights Change from green to red

0:47:22 > 0:47:28# They tried to stop But they both wound up dead

0:47:28 > 0:47:35# Death cab for Cutie Death cab for Cutie

0:47:35 > 0:47:40# Someone's going to make you pay your fare

0:47:43 > 0:47:48# Someone's going to make you pay your fare

0:47:51 > 0:47:55# Someone's going to make you pay your fare

0:47:59 > 0:48:06# Someone's going to make you pay your fare. #

0:48:06 > 0:48:10APPLAUSE

0:48:10 > 0:48:13CHEERING

0:48:20 > 0:48:23MUSIC: "Your Mother Should Know" by The Beatles

0:48:23 > 0:48:27# Let's all get up And dance to a song

0:48:27 > 0:48:32# That was a hit Before your mother was born

0:48:32 > 0:48:37# Though she was born A long, long time ago

0:48:37 > 0:48:38# Your mother should know

0:48:38 > 0:48:41# Your mother should...

0:48:41 > 0:48:42# Your mother should know

0:48:42 > 0:48:44# ..Know

0:48:44 > 0:48:46# Sing it again

0:48:46 > 0:48:50# Let's all get up And dance to a song

0:48:50 > 0:48:54# That was a hit Before your mother was born

0:48:54 > 0:48:59# Though she was born A long, long time ago

0:48:59 > 0:49:02# Your mother should know

0:49:02 > 0:49:03# Your mother should...

0:49:03 > 0:49:05# Your mother should know

0:49:05 > 0:49:06# ..Know

0:49:22 > 0:49:25# Lift up your hearts And sing me a song

0:49:25 > 0:49:30# That was a hit Before your mother was born

0:49:30 > 0:49:35# Though she was born A long, long time ago

0:49:35 > 0:49:37# Your mother should know

0:49:37 > 0:49:39# Your mother should...

0:49:39 > 0:49:41# Your mother should know

0:49:41 > 0:49:43# Aaaah

0:49:43 > 0:49:45# Your mother should know

0:49:45 > 0:49:47# Your mother should...

0:49:47 > 0:49:49# Your mother should know

0:49:49 > 0:49:51# Aaaah

0:50:04 > 0:50:06# Sing it again

0:50:06 > 0:50:14# Da-da-da-da-da-da Da-da-da-da-da-da

0:50:14 > 0:50:18# Though she was born A long, long time ago

0:50:18 > 0:50:20# Your mother should know

0:50:20 > 0:50:23# Your mother should...

0:50:23 > 0:50:26# Your mother should know

0:50:26 > 0:50:27# Know

0:50:27 > 0:50:28# Your mother should know

0:50:28 > 0:50:31# Your mother should...

0:50:31 > 0:50:33# Your mother should know

0:50:33 > 0:50:35# Know

0:50:35 > 0:50:37# Your mother should know

0:50:37 > 0:50:39# Your mother should...

0:50:39 > 0:50:42# Your mother should know

0:50:42 > 0:50:43# Know. #

0:50:43 > 0:50:48# Roll up

0:50:48 > 0:50:52# Roll up for the Mystery Tour

0:50:52 > 0:50:53# Roll up...

0:50:53 > 0:50:55# And that's an invitation...

0:50:55 > 0:50:58# Roll up for the Mystery Tour

0:50:58 > 0:51:00# Roll up...

0:51:00 > 0:51:02# To make a reservation

0:51:02 > 0:51:06# Roll up for the Mystery Tour

0:51:06 > 0:51:13# The Magical Mystery Tour Is coming to take you away

0:51:13 > 0:51:18# Coming to take you away

0:51:18 > 0:51:25# The Magical Mystery Tour Is dying to take you away

0:51:25 > 0:51:28# Dying to take you away

0:51:28 > 0:51:34# Take you today. #

0:51:50 > 0:51:53And that was a Magical Mystery Tour.

0:51:53 > 0:51:55I told you. Goodbye!

0:51:55 > 0:52:03# Hela hey helloa Hela hey helloa

0:52:03 > 0:52:04# Cha-cha-cha

0:52:04 > 0:52:07# Hela hey helloa

0:52:07 > 0:52:09# Whoo

0:52:09 > 0:52:12# Hela hey helloa

0:52:12 > 0:52:14# Hela!

0:52:14 > 0:52:17# Hela hey helloa

0:52:17 > 0:52:19# Cha-cha-cha

0:52:19 > 0:52:22# Hela hey helloa

0:52:22 > 0:52:24# Whoo

0:52:24 > 0:52:27# Hela hey helloa... #

0:52:29 > 0:52:31RANDOM CHATTER

0:52:31 > 0:52:34Testing, testing, here we are, testing, testing.

0:52:34 > 0:52:36- Continuity.- Is that a word?

0:52:36 > 0:52:37We don't know.

0:52:37 > 0:52:40We don't know where we're going. We'll be lucky if we get anywhere.

0:52:40 > 0:52:43- Someone said we're going to Bristol. - Are we going there?

0:52:43 > 0:52:45Where are we going? Does anyone know?

0:52:45 > 0:52:48- Where are we going? - We're going round and round...

0:52:48 > 0:52:52I live in Bristol, so anything you want to know...

0:52:52 > 0:52:55You know, you shouldn't drink vodka.

0:52:55 > 0:52:58- Why, what does it do?- It's quite a sexy drink.- Sexy?

0:52:58 > 0:53:00I slept in the swimming pool.

0:53:00 > 0:53:02- Morning, ladies!- Morning!

0:53:02 > 0:53:04# Lovely day

0:53:04 > 0:53:07# For singing in the rain. #

0:53:11 > 0:53:14Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd