Theatre of War

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0:00:02 > 0:00:07This programme contains strong language and some scenes which some viewers may find upsetting

0:00:07 > 0:00:11It's January 22nd, 2012.

0:00:11 > 0:00:15At the Theatre Royal, Haymarket, something quite unique is taking place.

0:00:15 > 0:00:20Unique not only for British theatre, but for world theatre.

0:00:20 > 0:00:23It's the first night, and indeed the last night,

0:00:23 > 0:00:25of a very unusual one-off play,

0:00:25 > 0:00:29called The Two Worlds of Charlie F,

0:00:29 > 0:00:33to be performed to a gala audience, speckled with showbiz glitterati,

0:00:33 > 0:00:36who know only that they've come to witness a courageous,

0:00:36 > 0:00:39but highly risky theatrical experiment,

0:00:39 > 0:00:42unlike anything ever attempted before.

0:00:43 > 0:00:45Nice to see you. Are you well?

0:00:45 > 0:00:47I'm well. Anxious about this.

0:00:47 > 0:00:49I've got no idea what to expect.

0:00:49 > 0:00:53I can't wait. But I'm more nervous now than I've ever been in me life.

0:00:53 > 0:00:58I hear it's very emotional, so I've brought lots of tissues.

0:00:58 > 0:01:02The Theatre Royal is London's oldest theatre,

0:01:02 > 0:01:08but it won't have seen anything like this in its 300-year history.

0:01:08 > 0:01:12You see, the actors are not actors, but professional soldiers,

0:01:12 > 0:01:15now facing a new and daunting challenge -

0:01:15 > 0:01:19to perform in a play based on their own experiences of war.

0:01:19 > 0:01:24All of them have been badly injured, mostly in Afghanistan.

0:01:24 > 0:01:27Many are still recovering and in pain.

0:01:27 > 0:01:29Good evening, Bravo 22 Company,

0:01:29 > 0:01:32this is your five-minute call, you have five minutes.

0:01:32 > 0:01:34None of them have ever acted before.

0:01:34 > 0:01:38Not even in a village hall, let alone a West End stage.

0:01:38 > 0:01:41Only Royal Marine Cassidy Little from Canada

0:01:41 > 0:01:43has any showbiz experience.

0:01:43 > 0:01:47A failed stand-up comedian turned Commando,

0:01:47 > 0:01:51he's the victim of a Taliban mine that cost him his right leg

0:01:51 > 0:01:54and two of his closest comrades.

0:01:54 > 0:01:56Quiet on stage, please, lights going out.

0:01:56 > 0:01:58Stand by please, one and two.

0:01:58 > 0:02:00This is not to be a fiction,

0:02:00 > 0:02:03but a very public reliving of recent past experiences

0:02:03 > 0:02:06in a distant theatre of war,

0:02:06 > 0:02:09that civilians cannot begin to imagine.

0:02:10 > 0:02:15The new company, Bravo 22 as it's called, has lived their war -

0:02:15 > 0:02:19now they're going to perform it to a packed house.

0:02:19 > 0:02:22But can they pull it off?

0:02:22 > 0:02:26Sound cue one, LX803.

0:02:26 > 0:02:27Go.

0:02:41 > 0:02:43HELICOPTER BLADES WHIRRING

0:03:29 > 0:03:33This is, this is... It's beautiful.

0:03:33 > 0:03:37- Nice and cool, isn't it? - Look at that. This is unbelievable.

0:03:37 > 0:03:42So you've got Owen over there on the chairs and Stephen Rayne as well.

0:03:42 > 0:03:43Rocking.

0:03:43 > 0:03:45It's October 4th, 2011,

0:03:45 > 0:03:49and Cassidy walks into the Theatre Royal for the first time

0:03:49 > 0:03:54to meet the director and writer of the play he's volunteered to be in.

0:03:54 > 0:03:57But not one word of which is yet written.

0:03:57 > 0:04:03To start something from scratch with amateurs,

0:04:03 > 0:04:08with amateurs who are undergoing recovery,

0:04:08 > 0:04:10recuperation, from... some of them very serious injuries,

0:04:10 > 0:04:13is a really big challenge,

0:04:13 > 0:04:17and it's completely against the normal process that we would go through,

0:04:17 > 0:04:20you know, in terms of... Owen would have an idea for a story

0:04:20 > 0:04:23- and he'd go away and start writing it.- Yeah.

0:04:23 > 0:04:27I would be given a play that I would want to do for whatever reason

0:04:27 > 0:04:29- and then you would start planning it. - Yeah.

0:04:29 > 0:04:32This way you have to say, well, no, we haven't got the play yet,

0:04:32 > 0:04:34we haven't got the story yet.

0:04:34 > 0:04:39What we have got are 20 to 30 people telling us stories of their lives

0:04:39 > 0:04:41and what can we make out of that, you know?

0:04:41 > 0:04:44So it's a very big, scary adventure.

0:04:45 > 0:04:47Only six months ago, Cassidy,

0:04:47 > 0:04:51who actually studied dance before he joined the Marines,

0:04:51 > 0:04:55had his right leg blown off by a Taliban IED,

0:04:55 > 0:05:01an Improvised Explosive Device, the number-one killer in Afghanistan.

0:05:03 > 0:05:06The idea is that a play will emerge organically

0:05:06 > 0:05:09from the recollections of all these soldiers,

0:05:09 > 0:05:10soon to be actors,

0:05:10 > 0:05:14who, like Cassidy, have volunteered to share their stories

0:05:14 > 0:05:19with Stephen the director and, in particular, with Owen, the writer.

0:05:19 > 0:05:22It's a massive mountain to climb.

0:05:22 > 0:05:26We'll set up base camp here and head for the summit in the morning.

0:05:26 > 0:05:30It's my job to, sort of, heighten the elements of their experiences

0:05:30 > 0:05:33and their speech in such a way that it can live in this space

0:05:33 > 0:05:36and that it can speak to an audience sitting here

0:05:36 > 0:05:39who will be coming cold to a subject and to issues that we'll have,

0:05:39 > 0:05:43you know, by then spent almost three months being immersed in.

0:05:43 > 0:05:47Do you remember when you were a kid and you fell off your bike,

0:05:47 > 0:05:52and your hand got rubbed against the grit and your knees got rubbed against the grit

0:05:52 > 0:05:58and your whole body kind of bounced along the pavement and you...

0:05:58 > 0:06:00That initial pain, you don't really feel it,

0:06:00 > 0:06:04but then suddenly you have this pulsing,

0:06:04 > 0:06:10you know, "Ow, ow, ow, ow... What the fuck?"

0:06:10 > 0:06:16Owen, as writer, has to feed off Cassidy's searing experience of frontline warfare.

0:06:16 > 0:06:18EXPLOSIONS

0:06:18 > 0:06:20And those of many others as well.

0:06:23 > 0:06:26Must have blacked out for a split second,

0:06:26 > 0:06:28cos next thing I know I wake up,

0:06:28 > 0:06:33I open my eyes and there's the blue sky, there's no sound and no pain.

0:06:33 > 0:06:36And it just...

0:06:36 > 0:06:38It's like a little Hamlet moment -

0:06:38 > 0:06:40you have two little seconds to yourself, like that.

0:06:40 > 0:06:43Then it all kicks in again.

0:06:43 > 0:06:45The shouting, the screaming.

0:06:45 > 0:06:52GUNFIRE AND SHOUTING

0:06:52 > 0:06:55I tried to sit myself up, couldn't, I couldn't move at all,

0:06:55 > 0:06:58and when they put me on the stretcher,

0:06:58 > 0:07:01that's when I noticed both my legs were gone.

0:07:01 > 0:07:04And then more pain kicked in

0:07:04 > 0:07:07and I pretty much screamed myself unconscious.

0:07:07 > 0:07:09SHOUTING

0:07:09 > 0:07:10GUNFIRE

0:07:10 > 0:07:13I got shrapnel straight through the back of my brain.

0:07:13 > 0:07:17The main impact is the... Is the brain injury

0:07:17 > 0:07:21and the subsequent brain impairments that I've now got

0:07:21 > 0:07:24which are with me for the rest of my life.

0:07:24 > 0:07:31I have a metal plate with some screws holding my left knee together.

0:07:31 > 0:07:34I'm, I'm in absolute agony

0:07:34 > 0:07:38and I take so many pain killers.

0:07:38 > 0:07:42I've tried all of them just to get through, get through the day.

0:07:42 > 0:07:47I was so miserable, so depressed, so down, so not me,

0:07:47 > 0:07:51I had retreated into this black shell that was inside of my head.

0:07:51 > 0:07:53Drinking.

0:07:53 > 0:07:56Depression, drinking, depression and it was overwhelming, actually.

0:07:56 > 0:07:58I lost my job in the Marines,

0:07:58 > 0:08:00lost my wife.

0:08:00 > 0:08:02I lost something within myself as well.

0:08:02 > 0:08:07To me, everything was falling away, sort of thing.

0:08:07 > 0:08:09And because of my behaviour as well...

0:08:09 > 0:08:13The material that we've been gathering in the interviews that we've been doing

0:08:13 > 0:08:15is really quite extraordinary.

0:08:15 > 0:08:18And I think that, you know, after each conversation

0:08:18 > 0:08:21we both have a sense of there's something there that can be used.

0:08:21 > 0:08:26You're off your face on the medications they've given you and...

0:08:26 > 0:08:30Cos you've just woken up, you know, you start seeing things, hallucinations.

0:08:30 > 0:08:32I thought the Taliban had got me.

0:08:32 > 0:08:38I started screaming for help. Like, "Help, help, fuck you, help!"

0:08:38 > 0:08:44Then I went into I'm Henry The VIII, I Am and sang two verses of that.

0:08:44 > 0:08:46Did you know them before?

0:08:46 > 0:08:47No. No, no.

0:08:47 > 0:08:50I think I only knew the first one and then I kind of...

0:08:50 > 0:08:53- I think I might have...- Invented the second one.- Improvised.

0:08:53 > 0:08:56At this stage all we can do is listen.

0:08:56 > 0:08:59All we can do is listen to these guys' stories

0:08:59 > 0:09:02and that, of course, is beginning to give us lots of ideas,

0:09:02 > 0:09:05but until we get those guys in a rehearsal room

0:09:05 > 0:09:09with lots of ideas, we don't know what we're going to come up with.

0:09:09 > 0:09:16So it's a huge exercise and leap of faith in each other and in them,

0:09:16 > 0:09:20and in the belief that by the end of a couple of months

0:09:20 > 0:09:23we will have something worth putting on a stage

0:09:23 > 0:09:26that not only they will enjoy doing, but that people will want to watch.

0:09:29 > 0:09:30Brixton, London.

0:09:30 > 0:09:35And Bravo 22 Company assembles for the first day of rehearsals.

0:09:35 > 0:09:38There are just ten weeks to the performance.

0:09:38 > 0:09:40- Morning.- Hello.

0:09:40 > 0:09:43I thought I'd be a lot more nervous than I am, actually.

0:09:43 > 0:09:45Maybe I'm fooling myself,

0:09:45 > 0:09:49but all of these guys, they're entering a world that they're not used to at all.

0:09:49 > 0:09:53The most important thing is that the people who theoretically do know what they're doing

0:09:53 > 0:09:58are very calm and relaxed and... you know, give them confidence.

0:09:58 > 0:10:02Chris, if you take pictures of me falling out of a minibus,

0:10:02 > 0:10:04I'll be mega pissed off with you.

0:10:06 > 0:10:09- Well, don't fall, then. - That would upset me.

0:10:09 > 0:10:10Well, don't fall out, yeah.

0:10:10 > 0:10:14Make me particularly grumpy.

0:10:14 > 0:10:16- Morning.- Good morning.

0:10:18 > 0:10:22I would like to say, first of all, thank you very much for being here.

0:10:22 > 0:10:24I was slightly terrified I was going turn up

0:10:24 > 0:10:27and there was going to be this empty hall in Brixton,

0:10:27 > 0:10:30so it's fantastic to see you all here.

0:10:30 > 0:10:35In a conventional production, this is the point when I'd be handing out the script,

0:10:35 > 0:10:36but as you've already gathered,

0:10:36 > 0:10:40this is very far from a conventional theatrical production.

0:10:40 > 0:10:44So the meat on the bone of the script, if you like,

0:10:44 > 0:10:47is really going to be found in this room and with you.

0:10:47 > 0:10:50I'm going to be doing an awful lot of just observing and watching,

0:10:50 > 0:10:52and listening.

0:10:52 > 0:10:55And then also they'll be an ongoing dialogue, really,

0:10:55 > 0:11:00between the stuff that I'm writing, which will be drawn from what happens in here,

0:11:00 > 0:11:03and then bringing that back into this room,

0:11:03 > 0:11:06where it will morph and it'll change,

0:11:06 > 0:11:09um, and we will begin to shape the play in here.

0:11:09 > 0:11:11But the last thing I want to say

0:11:11 > 0:11:13is that I do very much see this play as being your play,

0:11:13 > 0:11:15as being your voice.

0:11:15 > 0:11:18And my aspiration is for the piece to feel very true

0:11:18 > 0:11:20and very authentic for all of you here.

0:11:20 > 0:11:24I think that's it. Thank you very much again.

0:11:24 > 0:11:26Very good. Thanks, Owen.

0:11:28 > 0:11:33I genuinely can't imagine how stressful it is for guys like Owen,

0:11:33 > 0:11:36because, you know what I mean, it's got to be insane.

0:11:36 > 0:11:39Cos, you know, to be a writer and a director and a producer,

0:11:39 > 0:11:44and not actually have the script has got to be, like, nuts.

0:11:44 > 0:11:47You know, like it's not... You've got to be losing sleep.

0:11:47 > 0:11:50So I don't envy any of them, to be fair.

0:11:50 > 0:11:54- How are you feeling, are you looking forward to it? - Me? Man, I can't wait, I can't wait.

0:11:54 > 0:11:57It's like a ski hill, I'm just at the top looking down at it. It's great.

0:11:59 > 0:12:03So look, each day we're going to begin the day

0:12:03 > 0:12:05with what we call a warm-up.

0:12:05 > 0:12:08What it means is just getting us focused

0:12:08 > 0:12:11so that we can start the day kind of all in the same place, yeah?

0:12:11 > 0:12:15OK, and what I want you to do is just find somebody as partner.

0:12:15 > 0:12:19Doesn't matter who they are, find somebody and sit opposite them, OK?

0:12:19 > 0:12:22Just make one of you an A and one of you a B, OK.

0:12:22 > 0:12:24So, just decide between you.

0:12:24 > 0:12:27I'm going to give you two minutes, As, OK,

0:12:27 > 0:12:31to tell Bs the story of your life,

0:12:31 > 0:12:35but you've only got two minutes to tell it. OK, all right. Go.

0:12:39 > 0:12:41I grew up in north Yorkshire, got two brothers, mum and dad,

0:12:41 > 0:12:43and lots of dogs and lots of horses.

0:12:43 > 0:12:46Dad was in the Army so travelled a lot about when I was a kid.

0:12:46 > 0:12:49I went to a primary school, Mountfield Lodge.

0:12:49 > 0:12:54And then once I was in Canada, started bartending, did a lot of drinking, partying...

0:12:54 > 0:12:57Bravo 22 Company start from square one.

0:12:57 > 0:13:02Amongst them, as reinforcements, will be five professional actors,

0:13:02 > 0:13:03two men and three women,

0:13:03 > 0:13:07who'll provide at least a spine of experience and ability.

0:13:07 > 0:13:10The majority though, some 15, are complete novices

0:13:10 > 0:13:14and they'll be taking the lead roles on stage

0:13:14 > 0:13:16as well as behind the scenes.

0:13:16 > 0:13:20All are contending with a range of life-changing injuries,

0:13:20 > 0:13:23from partial blindness to loss of limb,

0:13:23 > 0:13:26and chronic spinal damage to traumatic brain injury.

0:13:26 > 0:13:32That entails driving all the vehicles in the British Army with the Royal Logistic Corps.

0:13:32 > 0:13:34After beating up a policeman,

0:13:34 > 0:13:39the judge turned round and told me that I needed to find an exit for my violent tendencies,

0:13:39 > 0:13:41so I joined the Army.

0:13:41 > 0:13:44All of them have had the experience of being in a military company,

0:13:44 > 0:13:47but now they have to quickly get into the idea

0:13:47 > 0:13:49of being part of a theatrical company.

0:13:49 > 0:13:53For the last month Steve and I have been introduced to their world.

0:13:53 > 0:13:58We've got, I'd say, a week to properly introduce them to our world

0:13:58 > 0:14:01so that we can start working properly as quickly as possible.

0:14:12 > 0:14:18WHISTLING AND SINGING

0:14:20 > 0:14:23Some of the interesting things that you do in the Marines

0:14:23 > 0:14:26as part of the bonding process

0:14:26 > 0:14:29you can apply the same principles to this place,

0:14:29 > 0:14:31which is stripping down the inhibitions,

0:14:31 > 0:14:33getting down to the real person

0:14:33 > 0:14:35and then seeing if you match up with other people.

0:14:35 > 0:14:38In the Marines, you make some lifelong friends.

0:14:38 > 0:14:44In the theatre, the connections that you'll make and the friends you'll make will be just as long.

0:14:44 > 0:14:47- And so you're still up for this? - Oh, yeah.

0:14:47 > 0:14:51No, you would have to pry me away, literally, with a crowbar,

0:14:51 > 0:14:52big black crowbar.

0:14:54 > 0:15:00Just try and move together so that I really can't tell who is doing that.

0:15:02 > 0:15:05And if you're confident that you're able to do it with, sort of,

0:15:05 > 0:15:09one hand or one arm, then you can begin to add another element,

0:15:09 > 0:15:12like the other hand or a foot.

0:15:12 > 0:15:16I don't want to be able to tell who's leading the movement.

0:15:16 > 0:15:20Oh, oh, I could see you were leading that, Maurillia. Slower. Slower.

0:15:20 > 0:15:23OK, first off...a chair.

0:15:29 > 0:15:33I want a doorway. Doorway.

0:15:34 > 0:15:37Ten, the number ten.

0:15:41 > 0:15:43The Eiffel Tower.

0:15:45 > 0:15:47I want to see that shape, everybody.

0:15:47 > 0:15:51I want it to be very fat at the bottom and very tall at the top.

0:15:51 > 0:15:52How are going to do that?

0:15:52 > 0:15:55I actually think this group has it. Yes, well done.

0:15:55 > 0:15:59Wasn't quite tall enough at the top. I don't know what...

0:15:59 > 0:16:02- How was that? Was that what you expected?- Not expected, but funny.

0:16:02 > 0:16:04It was funny, weren't it?

0:16:04 > 0:16:08Got to jump at the opportunity to make yourself look like a tit.

0:16:08 > 0:16:11We're so indoctrinated by the Army, we can't seem to say no.

0:16:11 > 0:16:12It's like, "I'll do this, sir."

0:16:12 > 0:16:15That's why we're all in a bad way, cos we can't say no.

0:16:15 > 0:16:18"So are you going to do Operation Certain Death?"

0:16:18 > 0:16:22"Yeah, I'll give it a go, see how it goes."

0:16:22 > 0:16:24WHOOPING NOISES

0:16:26 > 0:16:28It's a bold project, that's for sure,

0:16:28 > 0:16:31and I think everybody who's involved in it

0:16:31 > 0:16:34is incredibly brave and really stepping outside their comfort zone.

0:16:34 > 0:16:38A lot of people run marathons, want to go and climb a mountain,

0:16:38 > 0:16:41and actually, we've got an opportunity to do something

0:16:41 > 0:16:44so totally different, I think... I think it's going to be...

0:16:44 > 0:16:46it's going to be an adventure.

0:16:46 > 0:16:48WHOOPING NOISES

0:16:50 > 0:16:53A fantastic first day. This is really about building a company

0:16:53 > 0:16:57and starting to get a sense of people's characters,

0:16:57 > 0:16:59and I think, quite naturally,

0:16:59 > 0:17:02as the person who is going to be shaping the text of this,

0:17:02 > 0:17:06I've got very normal first day nerves, cos it...your...

0:17:06 > 0:17:09your instinct is that you want to know what the play is.

0:17:09 > 0:17:12You want to know what the scenes are. But I'm having to resist that

0:17:12 > 0:17:14cos I think it's... it's really important

0:17:14 > 0:17:16not to lock ourselves down too early, actually.

0:17:16 > 0:17:21So yeah, very apprehensive but very excited.

0:17:21 > 0:17:24WHOOPING AND WAILING

0:17:25 > 0:17:27It's the beginning of an era, isn't it?

0:17:27 > 0:17:30- It is, it is.- Beginning of an era.

0:17:30 > 0:17:35It's mind-blowing at the minute, a little bit.

0:17:35 > 0:17:37It's starting to pile up.

0:17:37 > 0:17:40I think the pyramid is now starting to build,

0:17:40 > 0:17:44so when we get to the top we'll see how we go.

0:17:44 > 0:17:46We'll definitely see how we go.

0:17:46 > 0:17:50But the pyramid is building, is building. It's awesome.

0:17:50 > 0:17:51Awesome. Good.

0:17:53 > 0:17:55End of Day One.

0:17:57 > 0:18:02'It's Day Four and Stephen and Owen have already upped the ante.'

0:18:02 > 0:18:04- Morning, my friend.- Morning.

0:18:04 > 0:18:06They want the play to have music, dance and song.

0:18:06 > 0:18:10- How are you?- I'm good, I'm good, thanks. How are you?

0:18:10 > 0:18:13Yes, not too bad. Not too bad.

0:18:13 > 0:18:15- Ready for a bit of music today?- Pardon?

0:18:15 > 0:18:19- Ready for a bit of music today? - Yeah a bit of la-la-la-la-la.

0:18:19 > 0:18:23- Yeah, yeah. Do I sound ready? - Yeah, you've got the job.

0:18:23 > 0:18:26Yeah. I knew you'd be back when we start singing.

0:18:28 > 0:18:33This morning, I am hoping to do a nice slow vocal warm-up

0:18:33 > 0:18:35and then see what they can do singing-wise,

0:18:35 > 0:18:38and then hopefully we're going to sing Men Of Harlech

0:18:38 > 0:18:41and see if we can learn some harmonies

0:18:41 > 0:18:43and whether that throws them into a panic

0:18:43 > 0:18:48or whether they're actually all natural-born singers and musicians.

0:18:48 > 0:18:52I'm terrified of singing. Especially in front of people. Just terrified.

0:18:52 > 0:18:55I'm embarrassed if I'm the only person in the house,

0:18:55 > 0:18:58I've got all the windows closed and all the doors closed

0:18:58 > 0:19:00and I'm in the shower and I know no-one can hear me,

0:19:00 > 0:19:02I'm still embarrassed about singing.

0:19:02 > 0:19:06Which is strange cos I come from a long line of musical people.

0:19:06 > 0:19:09But I am terrified of singing in public.

0:19:09 > 0:19:11THEY SING SCALES

0:19:15 > 0:19:17GUNFIRE

0:19:18 > 0:19:20While the Company of Bravo 22

0:19:20 > 0:19:23immerse themselves in musical theatre,

0:19:23 > 0:19:28Owen is engrossed in the theatre of war.

0:19:28 > 0:19:30Over a very short period of time,

0:19:30 > 0:19:34I think it's really essential for me to learn as much of the world

0:19:34 > 0:19:38that the cast have experienced as possible, you know,

0:19:38 > 0:19:43and fantastically, I've got these rushes

0:19:43 > 0:19:47that have been shot over the last couple of years,

0:19:47 > 0:19:50following troops around Afghanistan and...

0:19:52 > 0:19:55..it's proving to be incredibly useful, actually,

0:19:55 > 0:19:58in terms of learning that world and having your ear attuned

0:19:58 > 0:20:02to certain phrases, for language, you know,

0:20:02 > 0:20:04for all kinds of things, you know.

0:20:04 > 0:20:06It's that classic thing of

0:20:06 > 0:20:09you don't always know what you're looking for until you find it.

0:20:09 > 0:20:11Two, three, and...

0:20:11 > 0:20:13# Ba-ba-ba, ba-ba-ba Ba-ba-ba-ba

0:20:13 > 0:20:15# Ba-ba-ba, ba-ba-ba Ba-ba-ba-ba... #

0:20:15 > 0:20:19You're on patrol in Nad Ali North. It's gone horribly wrong.

0:20:19 > 0:20:21You've stood on that device. What's going to happen to your body?

0:20:21 > 0:20:23How many injuries is he going to receive?

0:20:23 > 0:20:26Think about it. How high is the amputation going to be?

0:20:26 > 0:20:29Your leg has now come off from there.

0:20:29 > 0:20:31We'll take your leg off from there.

0:20:31 > 0:20:33What other injuries is John going to have?

0:20:33 > 0:20:35Shrapnel? Where's he going to get shrapnel?

0:20:35 > 0:20:39He's going to get frag to the side of his neck,

0:20:39 > 0:20:42big chunks missing out of his legs from all the stones and crap

0:20:42 > 0:20:45that's come up off the floor. Where's that rifle going to go?

0:20:45 > 0:20:48Straight into his grid. He's going to get a fractured jaw along there.

0:20:48 > 0:20:50He'll probably get a fractured zygome.

0:20:50 > 0:20:52Bit of blast ear, coming out there,

0:20:52 > 0:20:54over pressure into the lung, blast lung.

0:20:54 > 0:20:56Lose a couple of fingers coming off there,

0:20:56 > 0:20:57maybe a chunk missing out of the forearm.

0:20:57 > 0:21:00Dislocated shoulder up there.

0:21:00 > 0:21:03It goes on and it goes on and it goes on.

0:21:04 > 0:21:07What's the first question you Royals always ask when you've been blown up?

0:21:07 > 0:21:09Are my cock and balls still there?

0:21:09 > 0:21:12And I'll go, "Yeah, but you're going to be

0:21:12 > 0:21:16"pissing in six different directions for the rest of your life."

0:21:16 > 0:21:20# The grand old Duke of York He had ten thousand men

0:21:20 > 0:21:23# He marched them up to the top of the hill

0:21:23 > 0:21:25# Then he marched them down again

0:21:25 > 0:21:27# And when they were up, they were up

0:21:27 > 0:21:29# And when they were down, they were down

0:21:29 > 0:21:31# And when they were only halfway up... #

0:21:31 > 0:21:33I mean, this is...

0:21:33 > 0:21:37This is a great example of almost a piece of found theatre.

0:21:37 > 0:21:43It's incredibly visual, and yet also,

0:21:43 > 0:21:46for me, I think it's doing something very powerful, you know.

0:21:46 > 0:21:50It's boiling down into the real sort of simplicity of war. The essence.

0:21:50 > 0:21:54And the fact that he's actually drawing on him,

0:21:54 > 0:21:55I suppose I'm finding that quite striking.

0:21:55 > 0:21:58It almost looks like the sort of diagrams that you see

0:21:58 > 0:22:02of you, know battle, manoeuvres and yet it's actually happening on...

0:22:02 > 0:22:04on this soldier's body.

0:22:04 > 0:22:06It's the kind of thing that no-one's ever told me about

0:22:06 > 0:22:11and that I wouldn't have known about unless I'd seen this.

0:22:12 > 0:22:15'You're going to have arteries running along the inside of the arm.

0:22:15 > 0:22:18'This is called the brachial artery.'

0:22:18 > 0:22:23# Men of Harlech, honour calls us

0:22:23 > 0:22:27# No proud Saxon e'er appals us

0:22:27 > 0:22:31# On we march whate'er befalls us

0:22:31 > 0:22:34# Never shall we fly. #

0:22:34 > 0:22:36Same tune, next bit.

0:22:39 > 0:22:43Seeing so much footage of the feet, of the patrolling boots,

0:22:43 > 0:22:47I suppose it's sort of focusing my mind about how, on the ground,

0:22:47 > 0:22:51the war really sort of comes down to that level, you know.

0:22:51 > 0:22:54It's that old military phrase, "Boots on the ground."

0:22:54 > 0:22:57But it means so much in an environment where,

0:22:57 > 0:23:01I think it's safe to say, the majority of the woundings

0:23:01 > 0:23:03are caused by IEDs.

0:23:03 > 0:23:07# Forward ever, backward never

0:23:07 > 0:23:11# This proud foe astounding

0:23:11 > 0:23:16# Fight for father Sister, mother... #

0:23:16 > 0:23:19You know, on the ground it's a very, very human experience

0:23:19 > 0:23:24and it's kind of ageless in all its tragedy.

0:23:24 > 0:23:30# We will win or die. #

0:23:34 > 0:23:37SHOUTING AND SCREAMING

0:23:38 > 0:23:40- Fuck! You all right? - Yeah, yeah I'm good.

0:23:40 > 0:23:43- Keep fucking looking, mate. - What's that supposed to mean?

0:23:43 > 0:23:44You're going to be all right.

0:23:44 > 0:23:47Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck!

0:23:47 > 0:23:49You've stepped on an IED, you're going to be fine.

0:23:49 > 0:23:51- You're going to be fine. - I'm going to fucking die.

0:23:51 > 0:23:56You've still got these, mate. You're all right there.

0:23:56 > 0:23:58OK. Dan...

0:23:58 > 0:24:03let him check your nuts, then "I'm going to die," OK?

0:24:03 > 0:24:06Initial ideas for the script are acted out,

0:24:06 > 0:24:08all based on personal experience.

0:24:08 > 0:24:13Like that of Dan Shaw, who until July 26th, 2009,

0:24:13 > 0:24:16was a six-foot-five rifleman.

0:24:17 > 0:24:20I lost my legs when I was 18.

0:24:21 > 0:24:26We were just on a routine patrol and unfortunately I hit an IED.

0:24:28 > 0:24:32I don't remember anything before the patrol itself.

0:24:32 > 0:24:36I just remember going to bed the night before

0:24:36 > 0:24:39and then, all of a sudden, I... I woke up

0:24:39 > 0:24:44a couple of weeks later and I was in Selly Oak Hospital.

0:24:44 > 0:24:46I'm going to fucking die. I'm going to fucking die.

0:24:46 > 0:24:48- You're not going to fucking die. - Oh, I'm going to fucking die.

0:24:48 > 0:24:51Just give me...give me a cigarette! Give me a fucking cigarette!

0:24:51 > 0:24:53I can't give you a fag, mate. I can't.

0:24:53 > 0:24:56Come on, I'm going to fucking die. Just give me what I want!

0:24:58 > 0:25:02At first they told me what happened

0:25:02 > 0:25:03and I kind of just drowned it out,

0:25:03 > 0:25:08like I didn't really want to hear it and I think, you know,

0:25:08 > 0:25:13cos what they told me was I was awake for the whole incident

0:25:13 > 0:25:16and I think my brain had just shut it out,

0:25:16 > 0:25:18saying to myself, you know,

0:25:18 > 0:25:20"You don't need to know what happened."

0:25:20 > 0:25:24So I carried on with my life. It doesn't affect me.

0:25:24 > 0:25:28My mum, my dad, it was hard for them.

0:25:28 > 0:25:33I personally think that it was harder for them to deal with it

0:25:33 > 0:25:35than me to deal with it because I was so young

0:25:35 > 0:25:39and, you know, they see their little boy grow up into this man.

0:25:39 > 0:25:43But I always keep a smile on my face, which I generally do.

0:25:43 > 0:25:45I ain't done this in a while.

0:25:45 > 0:25:47'Just keep smiling all the time.'

0:25:47 > 0:25:49CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:25:52 > 0:25:54At what time should I call the ambulance, mate?

0:25:54 > 0:25:57Now, mate. I'm frigged.

0:25:59 > 0:26:00Believe it or not,

0:26:00 > 0:26:04Dan has got himself cast as one of the dancers in the play.

0:26:06 > 0:26:08Oh, you just...don't know if my stumps are OK.

0:26:08 > 0:26:10I could be...my stumps could be severely injured,

0:26:10 > 0:26:12she just jumps on my stumps.

0:26:12 > 0:26:14I'm not bothered. Let's go for a ride.

0:26:14 > 0:26:16Go for a ride.

0:26:16 > 0:26:20All right! Giga-da-giga-da-goo!

0:26:21 > 0:26:23I've had the easiest job in a way, doing movement,

0:26:23 > 0:26:26because a lot of them find the physical side of this quite easy

0:26:26 > 0:26:29because they've used their bodies a lot in their job.

0:26:29 > 0:26:33And they've been really open and I've had no barriers up at all.

0:26:33 > 0:26:35They just, they just go for it.

0:26:35 > 0:26:38Just when...when you're bringing that one over to there,

0:26:38 > 0:26:42watch where your knees go, cos that one's fine.

0:26:42 > 0:26:46- But that one's still sore?- Yeah. If you just try and keep them up here.

0:26:46 > 0:26:48The only one of the three wheelchair dancers

0:26:48 > 0:26:52with dance experience is Royal Marine, Cassidy Little.

0:26:52 > 0:26:57- Are you...are you sturdy like that? - I'm sturdy.- OK.

0:26:57 > 0:26:59MUSIC: "Yes" by Antony and the Johnsons

0:27:07 > 0:27:10I started quite young in dance and...

0:27:10 > 0:27:13and I actually ended up doing, getting a scholarship for it

0:27:13 > 0:27:16and, you know, going to university to study it and all sorts of things.

0:27:16 > 0:27:17But unfortunately,

0:27:17 > 0:27:21recent events have prevented my future dancing career, so...

0:27:27 > 0:27:30Everything about it, the movement, the shape,

0:27:30 > 0:27:35that's what I was doing and now...now I'm not.

0:27:35 > 0:27:38Now I'm just sitting in a chair. You know, I'm wheeling upstage,

0:27:38 > 0:27:40downstage, wheeling around in a circle.

0:27:40 > 0:27:45OK, yeah, the...the interactive stuff with each other is great.

0:27:45 > 0:27:49I just... It's the first time I've been in this environment, you know,

0:27:49 > 0:27:53with this cast and crew that I can honestly say I miss my foot.

0:27:53 > 0:27:57Because, you know, it would mean if I had my foot back

0:27:57 > 0:27:59I would be up dancing.

0:27:59 > 0:28:01So...

0:28:01 > 0:28:03I miss my foot.

0:28:03 > 0:28:06'Do you remember when you were a kid and you fell off your bike

0:28:06 > 0:28:08'and your hand got rubbed against the grit

0:28:08 > 0:28:11'and your knees got rubbed against the grit and you...

0:28:11 > 0:28:12'and your whole body kind of...'

0:28:12 > 0:28:16One of the most time consuming things is actually trawling through

0:28:16 > 0:28:19all of the audio files of the early interviews that I've been doing

0:28:19 > 0:28:22with the guys and just listening to it again and again.

0:28:22 > 0:28:28With a view to, again, you know, pulling out those moments

0:28:28 > 0:28:33that not only you instinctively feel might work in the play

0:28:33 > 0:28:36but as more and more of the play is written, it's sort of...

0:28:36 > 0:28:39It's sorts of closing down your options as well.

0:28:39 > 0:28:41'I don't remember anything of the day.

0:28:41 > 0:28:44'I don't remember waking up, I don't remember eating breakfast.

0:28:44 > 0:28:48'I don't remember getting orders.

0:28:48 > 0:28:52'I don't remember loading up, leaving the compound.'

0:28:52 > 0:28:54I don't remember...

0:28:55 > 0:28:58..getting to the compound where the bomb went off.

0:29:04 > 0:29:06The next thing I know

0:29:06 > 0:29:12I'm in the middle of a horrific hallucination.

0:29:12 > 0:29:18I thought that I was being interrogated by a Taliban nurse.

0:29:18 > 0:29:23Help! Help, I'm over here! Help, please!

0:29:23 > 0:29:26- Can you remember your name?- ANA!

0:29:26 > 0:29:29- You'll wake the other patients.- ANA!

0:29:29 > 0:29:33'I'm screaming and I'm yelling at the doctors and the consultants.

0:29:33 > 0:29:36'Calling them traitors and then in walked Laura, my fiancee.

0:29:36 > 0:29:38'And, of course, I broke down in tears then

0:29:38 > 0:29:41'because I figured that she'd been captured by the Taliban.

0:29:41 > 0:29:43'I couldn't... it didn't make any sense.'

0:29:43 > 0:29:44Charlie, it's me.

0:29:44 > 0:29:48Oh, fucking Jesus. How did they fucking get you?

0:29:48 > 0:29:50Have they fucking touched you?

0:29:50 > 0:29:53Have they fucking touched anything on your head?

0:29:54 > 0:29:56How did they get you?

0:29:56 > 0:29:59If you've fucking touched one fucking hair on her head,

0:29:59 > 0:30:01I'll fucking...!

0:30:03 > 0:30:07He was having awful hallucinations in hospital.

0:30:07 > 0:30:09He...and he was really big. I mean, he was huge

0:30:09 > 0:30:12because the shock had obviously caused his body to fill with...

0:30:12 > 0:30:16with fluid, so his... his lips were really puffy,

0:30:16 > 0:30:19even though he had a... he was intubated.

0:30:19 > 0:30:24But he did just look like Cassidy and it was such a relief.

0:30:24 > 0:30:27And I just have no idea about the numbers of...

0:30:27 > 0:30:29Of lads that were coming back injured.

0:30:29 > 0:30:33I mean, I couldn't believe it, that first...the first weekend

0:30:33 > 0:30:35when I was living down in Birmingham at the hospital,

0:30:35 > 0:30:37and then the second weekend,

0:30:37 > 0:30:40and they just kept coming in and coming in and coming in.

0:30:40 > 0:30:42You know, double amputees, triple amputees.

0:30:42 > 0:30:47Guys without genitals, guys without eyes. Guys without fingers.

0:30:47 > 0:30:50And I was shocked at the numbers that just kept coming through the system.

0:30:50 > 0:30:52Just coming in, coming in, coming in.

0:30:52 > 0:30:55'You know that feeling when you come off your bike, you know, as a kid?

0:30:55 > 0:30:57'D'you remember that pain?

0:30:57 > 0:30:59'The one where you, the one you feel at first.' Wrong.

0:30:59 > 0:31:01'The one you don't feel at first.'

0:31:01 > 0:31:04GUNFIRE

0:31:08 > 0:31:10SHOUTING

0:31:13 > 0:31:15GUNFIRE

0:31:18 > 0:31:21Start dropping on it.

0:31:21 > 0:31:24Hello, 63. This is 63 Alpha.

0:31:26 > 0:31:31That's it, Liam, perfect. Yeah, great. Slow, slow, slow.

0:31:31 > 0:31:35'2008, in Afghanistan, we got ambushed from a couple of sides

0:31:35 > 0:31:38'and, erm, yeah, we took a heavy weight of fire.

0:31:41 > 0:31:44'There was a flash. Explosion.'

0:31:47 > 0:31:51Just a few bursts and keep them suppressed...!

0:31:52 > 0:31:55'I didn't realise I'd lost the sight in my right eye.

0:31:55 > 0:32:00'It's my shooting eye as well, so, my rifle eye.'

0:32:00 > 0:32:02I think...

0:32:02 > 0:32:07for me personally, I think it was more the psychological side

0:32:07 > 0:32:09that affected me in my everyday life

0:32:09 > 0:32:13and losing the sight of my right eye.

0:32:13 > 0:32:15Like, I drunk quite a lot as well

0:32:15 > 0:32:18and consequently it just landed me in a lot of trouble with the police.

0:32:18 > 0:32:21I had a few accounts of assault, ABH.

0:32:23 > 0:32:27Just...it just must have been...don't know...

0:32:27 > 0:32:30something aggressive, quite...

0:32:30 > 0:32:34inside triggered off I think after a few drinks.

0:32:34 > 0:32:37I don't know if it's just ideas of me trying to get revenge.

0:32:39 > 0:32:43'I just go out on it all day. I don't give a fuck.

0:32:43 > 0:32:45'I get wound up, wound up by the smallest thing

0:32:45 > 0:32:47'and I just want to smash something up. Or someone.'

0:32:47 > 0:32:50Only when you drink.

0:32:50 > 0:32:52'Well, the drink makes it worse.

0:32:52 > 0:32:55'The anger's there all the time and it's little images like,

0:32:55 > 0:32:59'fucking, I don't know, when an IED blew a mate's hands off,

0:32:59 > 0:33:01'the look in his eyes, that sort of thing.'

0:33:01 > 0:33:03You're on probation now, aren't you?

0:33:03 > 0:33:08Bravo 22 Company is beginning to get into its acting stride.

0:33:08 > 0:33:12But let's remember that all these actors are seriously damaged,

0:33:12 > 0:33:16physically and emotionally. They're still mending.

0:33:21 > 0:33:23I walk into the rehearsal room every morning

0:33:23 > 0:33:25not quite sure who's going to be there.

0:33:25 > 0:33:27Obviously the guys, you know, are sick some days,

0:33:27 > 0:33:29sometimes their meds haven't worked properly,

0:33:29 > 0:33:32they've had a bad night's sleep so they can't come and rehearse,

0:33:32 > 0:33:34so it's always a bit of a lottery.

0:33:34 > 0:33:37Hi there, Taff, how you doing? It's Owen here.

0:33:37 > 0:33:40I'm just giving you a quick ring cos we've heard from the guys

0:33:40 > 0:33:42that you're not feeling too great

0:33:42 > 0:33:45and you're staying in the accommodation today.

0:33:45 > 0:33:47Would be great to have a chat, firstly to ask

0:33:47 > 0:33:50if there's anything we can do to help, if there's anything...

0:33:50 > 0:33:53or anyone who you'd like to talk to

0:33:53 > 0:33:57cos unless a doctor's kind of signed you off and seen you and said

0:33:57 > 0:34:01that you have to stay in bed you really, really have to be here.

0:34:01 > 0:34:04But when they told me it was the hardest training in the world,

0:34:04 > 0:34:06there was no fucking way I was going to quit, was there?

0:34:06 > 0:34:08What's happened?

0:34:08 > 0:34:11So Taff, one of our soldiers, one of our cast,

0:34:11 > 0:34:15hasn't turned up today and apparently...

0:34:15 > 0:34:18we're not quite sure why. Erm, but it is...

0:34:18 > 0:34:21it's one of the challenges of this project is that

0:34:21 > 0:34:24all the guys are on a huge amount of medication,

0:34:24 > 0:34:27they're very kindly now trying to pull back from medication

0:34:27 > 0:34:29so they can focus, so they can stay awake

0:34:29 > 0:34:31and I just hope that isn't meaning that, you know,

0:34:31 > 0:34:35it kind of messes up their sleep patterns

0:34:35 > 0:34:39or they're in so much pain that they're always exhausted and stuff.

0:34:39 > 0:34:42It's...it's just one of the features of this unique production!

0:34:42 > 0:34:44All right, Jase, thank you.

0:34:52 > 0:34:56# Codeine, Tramadol Benzadryl, Oramorph

0:34:56 > 0:35:00# Paracetamol, MSD

0:35:00 > 0:35:04# Amitryptyline, Diazepam... #

0:35:04 > 0:35:08I've got Tramadol, which is a pain killer.

0:35:11 > 0:35:15You know, this is really basic, you know, to keep me going.

0:35:15 > 0:35:17These are just paracetamol, it's fine.

0:35:19 > 0:35:23But I used to be on morphine and all sorts and it just didn't work.

0:35:25 > 0:35:29But then, you know, I sort of...

0:35:29 > 0:35:31I'm on the edge and I've got to tweak it.

0:35:31 > 0:35:33It's like a system, you know.

0:35:35 > 0:35:38Yeah, it's not the end of the... you know, I'm lucky,

0:35:38 > 0:35:40I've got my legs and I've got my arms.

0:35:40 > 0:35:43I can still do a lot more than a lot...lot of people.

0:35:43 > 0:35:46THEY SING

0:35:48 > 0:35:50Relax.

0:36:01 > 0:36:06Ecstasy, ecstasy, ecstasy! I want ecstasy on ketamine.

0:36:06 > 0:36:09Whatever it does to you, please be ecstatic, OK?

0:36:12 > 0:36:15As the weeks pass, there's an increasing emphasis placed

0:36:15 > 0:36:19on routine, repetition, discipline and teamwork.

0:36:20 > 0:36:24..Two, three, four, five, six, turn!

0:36:24 > 0:36:26One, two, three...

0:36:26 > 0:36:28The parallels between the world of theatre and the world of the army

0:36:28 > 0:36:31are really interesting and more and more of those are coming out.

0:36:31 > 0:36:35Even this... the whole concept of rehearsals and drilling and drilling

0:36:35 > 0:36:38and going through the movements... yeah, I mean like every few days

0:36:38 > 0:36:41you'll hear people say, 'Oh, it's a bit like being in the army.'

0:36:41 > 0:36:44Ba-a-a-ang!

0:36:44 > 0:36:48But what we're trying to get right now is the voice of the piece,

0:36:48 > 0:36:49the real heart of it, the tone of it.

0:36:49 > 0:36:53And there's three or four people who are really revealing themselves

0:36:53 > 0:36:55to have some real talent, I think.

0:36:58 > 0:37:06# I sing because I'm happy

0:37:06 > 0:37:12# I sing because I'm free

0:37:12 > 0:37:20# For his eye is on the sparrow

0:37:22 > 0:37:25# And I know... #

0:37:26 > 0:37:32When I was seven years old, I had a dream.

0:37:32 > 0:37:34I was going to live where the Queen lived

0:37:34 > 0:37:37and I was going to be a soldier.

0:37:39 > 0:37:43That day I saw the Queen, aged seven,

0:37:43 > 0:37:46she came to visit my country,

0:37:46 > 0:37:49Trinidad and Tobago, on Independence Day,

0:37:49 > 0:37:51one of her royal visits.

0:37:51 > 0:37:56And we all lined the streets of San Fernando waving

0:37:56 > 0:38:03and I just saw her in this pink matching suit, hat,

0:38:03 > 0:38:07and I just shouted,

0:38:07 > 0:38:11"I'm going to live where you live."

0:38:11 > 0:38:17And as we were waving she had on a pink hat and a matching suit.

0:38:17 > 0:38:20And as she waved, I was shouting,

0:38:20 > 0:38:23"I'm going to live where you live!

0:38:23 > 0:38:25"I'm going to live where you live."

0:38:25 > 0:38:29And then I had my dream,

0:38:29 > 0:38:34and I told my mother about it while she was combing my hair.

0:38:34 > 0:38:37OK now, that's good darling, that's lovely.

0:38:37 > 0:38:39Just having the two points of focus...

0:38:39 > 0:38:43Maurillia's dream was to be a soldier in the Queen's Army.

0:38:43 > 0:38:47It was a dream that was realised, then shattered.

0:38:47 > 0:38:50What's led me to this place?

0:38:50 > 0:38:52To be honest, it came at a time

0:38:52 > 0:38:57where I still couldn't get my head round being injured.

0:38:57 > 0:39:00You know, having everything that I worked for just taken

0:39:00 > 0:39:04within the twinkle of my eye, you know.

0:39:05 > 0:39:07Having, being...

0:39:07 > 0:39:13becoming disabled, you know, it was hard. Really, really hard.

0:39:13 > 0:39:18But then when you get with other injured servicemen and women

0:39:18 > 0:39:21and you experience their pain, you realise,

0:39:21 > 0:39:23"Well, wait,

0:39:23 > 0:39:26"I went through that."

0:39:26 > 0:39:30"I'm taking those meds. That's the same effect it has on me."

0:39:32 > 0:39:36And our stories then entwine with each other.

0:39:37 > 0:39:40For two years I couldn't sleep.

0:39:40 > 0:39:44Every fucking night, just images flickering through.

0:39:44 > 0:39:47Being blown up, Yanks on fire running into walls.

0:39:47 > 0:39:51Crawling through dead bodies in some fucking IED factory. Just images...

0:39:53 > 0:39:54It seems empty.

0:39:54 > 0:39:58- Well, it obviously fucking wasn't, was it?!- But we saw them leaving.

0:39:58 > 0:39:59We saw them fucking leaving.

0:39:59 > 0:40:01It's going to be...

0:40:01 > 0:40:05a play, in a play, in a play, in a play.

0:40:05 > 0:40:08The message of

0:40:08 > 0:40:13men and women, going through... the darkest place,

0:40:13 > 0:40:15the happy place,

0:40:15 > 0:40:18the alone place.

0:40:18 > 0:40:21The pain place.

0:40:21 > 0:40:23The scared place.

0:40:23 > 0:40:25You know, the dying place.

0:40:26 > 0:40:29The wish if you were dead place is...

0:40:29 > 0:40:33is so rounded and so full of...

0:40:33 > 0:40:35of life,

0:40:35 > 0:40:37that it's going to be amazing.

0:40:37 > 0:40:40# Scared to close my eyes

0:40:40 > 0:40:45# Scared to put my head on the pillow

0:40:45 > 0:40:49# Worse at night Always worse at night. #

0:40:52 > 0:40:54It's the pain that triggers it.

0:40:54 > 0:40:56It's always there, bubbling away.

0:40:56 > 0:41:00But worse at night, always worse at night.

0:41:00 > 0:41:04One of the really interesting things was feeling how, for about, I suppose,

0:41:04 > 0:41:05five of the characters,

0:41:05 > 0:41:09they actually developed very strong, specific arcs.

0:41:10 > 0:41:13So, for example, Lyndon's character, Richard,

0:41:13 > 0:41:17his kind of main emotional axis, is very much with his mother,

0:41:17 > 0:41:21and so his story is a mother-son story.

0:41:21 > 0:41:23"Dear Rich... a few more parcels for you.

0:41:23 > 0:41:27"No chocolate like you asked but lots of Haribo and shower gel."

0:41:27 > 0:41:31My character is basically, me, to be honest.

0:41:31 > 0:41:34Almost in every way, it's about me,

0:41:34 > 0:41:40you know, it goes from being happy and motivated

0:41:40 > 0:41:43to breaking down,

0:41:43 > 0:41:46snappy.

0:41:50 > 0:41:53These are all things that you could apply to yourself?

0:41:53 > 0:41:57Yeah, for over the last couple of years, definitely.

0:41:59 > 0:42:00No matter how black it was,

0:42:00 > 0:42:04I'd always, you know, try and put a smile on,

0:42:04 > 0:42:06especially for my mother...

0:42:08 > 0:42:10..so I, sort of, kept a lot of it in.

0:42:10 > 0:42:13She's like me, though. She hid everything,

0:42:13 > 0:42:14kept it to herself.

0:42:16 > 0:42:18But you can always tell, can't you?

0:42:21 > 0:42:23That was the vehicle Lyndon was in.

0:42:24 > 0:42:26What was left of it.

0:42:26 > 0:42:30They weren't looking for anybody still alive in it.

0:42:30 > 0:42:32Yeah, they thought I was a pink mist.

0:42:32 > 0:42:35Cos it was at night time, as well, and they couldn't find me.

0:42:35 > 0:42:37So, they thought I was just pink mist

0:42:37 > 0:42:40and blown up into every little bit.

0:42:40 > 0:42:41They thought you were killed?

0:42:41 > 0:42:43Yeah.

0:42:43 > 0:42:45Well, you'd think so, looking at the vehicle, wouldn't you?

0:42:46 > 0:42:48When I first saw him,

0:42:48 > 0:42:52to find out how ill he was and how wrecked he was,

0:42:52 > 0:42:55I mean he still had sand in his... in his belly button.

0:42:55 > 0:42:59He still had sand in his toes from the... from the desert.

0:42:59 > 0:43:03He still had cordite, you know, um, on him.

0:43:03 > 0:43:06It was just, um, from the explosion.

0:43:06 > 0:43:10He was coughing up cordite all the time

0:43:10 > 0:43:15and to see your son like that, with broken teeth, he can't feed himself,

0:43:15 > 0:43:18he can't move off the bed because his back's broken,

0:43:18 > 0:43:20he had shrapnel wounds as well,

0:43:20 > 0:43:23to his legs,

0:43:23 > 0:43:26his groin, his arms, his face.

0:43:28 > 0:43:30So, it was...

0:43:32 > 0:43:35He was different to the lad I waved goodbye to. Yeah.

0:43:38 > 0:43:40But at the end of the day, he's my son, isn't he?

0:43:40 > 0:43:43He's my baby.

0:43:43 > 0:43:44I'd never stop him.

0:43:44 > 0:43:48Well, it's hard. Yeah, it is, seeing your boy go off like that.

0:43:52 > 0:43:55I don't think I can put it into words how proud I am.

0:43:58 > 0:44:00- (VOICE CRACKS)- And that he's here.

0:44:01 > 0:44:04Because there's no way he should be here.

0:44:04 > 0:44:06He shouldn't... he shouldn't be here.

0:44:09 > 0:44:10The nature of the conflict

0:44:10 > 0:44:13and the issues that individuals have to deal with at such a young age...

0:44:13 > 0:44:15I mean that's what's really hit me between the eyes,

0:44:15 > 0:44:17is that, you know,

0:44:17 > 0:44:21a lot of these guys, when they, sort of, take up their weapons

0:44:21 > 0:44:24and they go to war, they're boys, you know.

0:44:25 > 0:44:27And also, you get a sense, via them,

0:44:27 > 0:44:31of the level of destruction out there as well

0:44:31 > 0:44:35and so it's definitely opened my eyes, and there was a period,

0:44:35 > 0:44:38I'd say in the first two or three weeks of rehearsal,

0:44:38 > 0:44:40where I'd just had a month of interviewing them,

0:44:40 > 0:44:43I got a little taste, just a tiny taste, I think,

0:44:43 > 0:44:46of some of the anger that they must sometimes feel.

0:44:49 > 0:44:51We didn't mean to cause offence. Sorry.

0:44:51 > 0:44:53Are you with them too, them?

0:44:53 > 0:44:55Who the fuck is them?

0:44:55 > 0:44:57- Well, the soldiers.- Yeah, I am.

0:44:58 > 0:45:01Well then, sorry, what's wrong with you?

0:45:01 > 0:45:03Oh, I don't know. I broke me back in two places.

0:45:03 > 0:45:05I had a disc at C5 and C7 removed.

0:45:05 > 0:45:08I'm addicted to meds and when the pain gets too much

0:45:08 > 0:45:10I fall over and piss myself in public.

0:45:10 > 0:45:12- Why, what's the matter with you? - All right, mate,

0:45:12 > 0:45:15- I was only asking.- Fucking prick.

0:45:15 > 0:45:17Take it easy, mate, take it easy.

0:45:19 > 0:45:21I don't really have a social life any more

0:45:21 > 0:45:23because, basically...

0:45:26 > 0:45:29..the risk of falling over, because occasionally

0:45:29 > 0:45:31I've actually pissed myself

0:45:31 > 0:45:34with the pain when you go down, and you just...

0:45:34 > 0:45:35your bladder just lets go.

0:45:38 > 0:45:40There's always that...

0:45:43 > 0:45:46..worry that you'll be out having a good time,

0:45:46 > 0:45:48something will happen,

0:45:48 > 0:45:52you'll be on the floor, and in a puddle of piss, basically.

0:45:52 > 0:45:54Which has happened in public before,

0:45:54 > 0:45:57and everybody just looks at you like you're a freak.

0:45:59 > 0:46:03And you start thinking people think you're just putting it on and...

0:46:04 > 0:46:08..and you just become very argumentative with everybody.

0:46:08 > 0:46:10What's the matter with you?

0:46:10 > 0:46:12'And I mean everybody.'

0:46:14 > 0:46:15Fucking prick.

0:46:17 > 0:46:19It is very, very rich material

0:46:19 > 0:46:22and, you know, the subject areas that we're dealing with

0:46:22 > 0:46:25is very rich. It's also very extreme.

0:46:25 > 0:46:27My personal aspiration for this piece is that,

0:46:27 > 0:46:31although it isn't a political piece with a capital P,

0:46:31 > 0:46:34this isn't about, you know,

0:46:34 > 0:46:36why we go to war or where we go to war.

0:46:36 > 0:46:39But what I hope it is about, is saying that if that choice is made,

0:46:39 > 0:46:41fine, you know, make that choice,

0:46:41 > 0:46:44as long as you realise this is what those...

0:46:44 > 0:46:47this is what those three letters mean. This is what war is.

0:46:47 > 0:46:50And I just think we just don't realise that enough.

0:46:50 > 0:46:53I was blown to 20 metres.

0:46:53 > 0:46:54I heard the rocket coming in.

0:46:54 > 0:46:55I was blown 60 feet.

0:46:55 > 0:46:58It went over and I hit the roof.

0:46:58 > 0:47:01The shrapnel went through the back of my brain.

0:47:01 > 0:47:03It shattered my cheek bone.

0:47:03 > 0:47:07Apparently, a soldier stood on an undetected IED,

0:47:07 > 0:47:08killing him instantly,

0:47:08 > 0:47:13and then the shrapnel blast, or the blast from that IED,

0:47:13 > 0:47:15then hit my Company Tactical Headquarters,

0:47:15 > 0:47:21and I was found in a bush, about 20 metres away, cradling my head.

0:47:23 > 0:47:26I realised how serious it was, because, obviously, it was the brain

0:47:26 > 0:47:31and they had said it the shrapnel was...

0:47:31 > 0:47:33was millimetres away from the spinal cord,

0:47:33 > 0:47:35but at the time would never have envisaged

0:47:35 > 0:47:37what we've had to live with since.

0:47:37 > 0:47:39I imagined it was all going to be physical -

0:47:39 > 0:47:42balance and walking and all sorts of things,

0:47:42 > 0:47:45but actually we've had a different set of challenges

0:47:45 > 0:47:47to overcome emotionally.

0:47:49 > 0:47:52And it is quite difficult with the children because

0:47:52 > 0:47:58Olivia, very much, sees a different daddy to the one that went away.

0:47:58 > 0:48:01Annabel will of course grow up only knowing Stewart as he is now,

0:48:01 > 0:48:07but Olivia, it's difficult for her, because Stewart's changed hugely.

0:48:10 > 0:48:13I have difficulties with problem solving, attention,

0:48:13 > 0:48:15working memory,

0:48:15 > 0:48:17modification,

0:48:17 > 0:48:21organising, planning, amending.

0:48:21 > 0:48:24So, everything that I was in terms of my role,

0:48:24 > 0:48:26in terms of my 18 years in the Army,

0:48:26 > 0:48:30being an officer, having command, management responsibility,

0:48:30 > 0:48:34I'm pretty much ineffective in all of those now.

0:48:34 > 0:48:37So, that really is really frustrating for me.

0:48:37 > 0:48:39It must have been hard. It must be hard.

0:48:39 > 0:48:42It is. I think it, you know and I think if it had have been physical,

0:48:42 > 0:48:47it would have been easier to come to terms with and to manage,

0:48:47 > 0:48:51because this will never change now.

0:48:51 > 0:48:53This is what we will have to live with,

0:48:53 > 0:48:55for the rest of Stewart's life.

0:48:56 > 0:49:00THEY SING

0:49:06 > 0:49:08Not allowed to keep a mobile phone out here,

0:49:08 > 0:49:10they're too easy to intercept.

0:49:10 > 0:49:13Or, if the enemy get hold of them and they phone the families at home,

0:49:13 > 0:49:17tell them that their son or their husband's been captured, which isn't good.

0:49:17 > 0:49:22So, each week, we get 20 welfare minutes on the sat-phone instead,

0:49:22 > 0:49:24which is great.

0:49:24 > 0:49:26Hearing your wife's voice, speaking to the kids.

0:49:29 > 0:49:31But it's really hard, too,

0:49:31 > 0:49:34you feel the distance.

0:49:36 > 0:49:38After speaking with them,

0:49:38 > 0:49:42I have to try really hard to disconnect from them again.

0:49:42 > 0:49:43Saying goodbye.

0:49:43 > 0:49:46That's the hardest,

0:49:46 > 0:49:48saying goodbye.

0:49:50 > 0:49:52# Kiss kiss, love you

0:49:52 > 0:49:55# Kiss kiss, love you

0:49:55 > 0:50:00# PS, PS, love you, love you. #

0:50:16 > 0:50:18Only ten days to curtain up.

0:50:18 > 0:50:20The stress levels are rising.

0:50:20 > 0:50:22I swear by Almighty God.

0:50:22 > 0:50:25OK, do it again, one, two, three. Just nice and easy.

0:50:25 > 0:50:29And Ray Winston, a mentor and patron of the new company,

0:50:29 > 0:50:31is here to assess their progress,

0:50:31 > 0:50:33and, I suspect, to boost morale.

0:50:33 > 0:50:35I went back to my auntie's.

0:50:35 > 0:50:39When I came in the door, I said, "Auntie, I'm a soldier."

0:50:39 > 0:50:41I was living my dream.

0:50:41 > 0:50:42Slowly.

0:50:43 > 0:50:45I swear by Almighty God,

0:50:45 > 0:50:48that I will be faithful and bear true allegiance

0:50:48 > 0:50:53to Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II, her heirs and successors.

0:50:53 > 0:50:55TOGETHER: And that I will, as in duty bound,

0:50:55 > 0:50:59honestly and faithfully defend Her Majesty,

0:50:59 > 0:51:02her heirs and successors in person,

0:51:02 > 0:51:05crown and in dignity against...

0:51:05 > 0:51:06Fuck!

0:51:06 > 0:51:10..and will observe and obey all orders...

0:51:10 > 0:51:13No. No. Her Majesty...

0:51:13 > 0:51:16Guys, we've got to learn this.

0:51:16 > 0:51:18It's still dragging...

0:51:18 > 0:51:21Every production, every rehearsal period,

0:51:21 > 0:51:23has its dips and its peaks,

0:51:23 > 0:51:27and I think there could be a very tricky time this week.

0:51:27 > 0:51:30Light headedness, peeing on the carpet,

0:51:30 > 0:51:31all kinds of...

0:51:31 > 0:51:33- Line?- Loss of appetite.

0:51:33 > 0:51:36Loss of appetite, pain... shit, dark piss.

0:51:36 > 0:51:40Yeah, it's OK, Charlie, I see your point.

0:51:40 > 0:51:41The meds...

0:51:41 > 0:51:46No, the drugs don't fucking work.

0:51:46 > 0:51:49Oi, you lot, get fell in.

0:51:50 > 0:51:52This is Crabby's big scene.

0:51:52 > 0:51:54He's been struggling with his lines

0:51:54 > 0:51:56and the West End is looming.

0:51:56 > 0:51:58Stand up straight.

0:51:58 > 0:52:01- You, stop looking at me funny. - Sorry, Serg.- Serg?

0:52:01 > 0:52:04Would you like to massage... No.

0:52:04 > 0:52:07Would you like me to massage your... no.

0:52:07 > 0:52:10LAUGHTER

0:52:11 > 0:52:14- Do serg again.- Sorry, serg.

0:52:14 > 0:52:17Would you like me to massage your passage with my sausage?

0:52:17 > 0:52:19Got it the wrong way round anyway.

0:52:19 > 0:52:22Right, and you lot, you, get a haircut.

0:52:22 > 0:52:25You, fucking sit up straight.

0:52:25 > 0:52:27Oi, dribbly chops, you stop dribbling.

0:52:27 > 0:52:30And you, think you're funny, sonny boy,

0:52:30 > 0:52:32well, I'll soon show you that.

0:52:35 > 0:52:38# You will not call me mate

0:52:38 > 0:52:40# I am not your friend

0:52:40 > 0:52:43# You will not call me sir

0:52:43 > 0:52:45# I am not your friend

0:52:45 > 0:52:47# You'll call me bombadier

0:52:47 > 0:52:49# Look at me in fear

0:52:49 > 0:52:52# No matter how sweet I may appear

0:52:52 > 0:52:54# I am not your mate... #

0:52:54 > 0:52:59COMPANY JOINS SINGING

0:53:16 > 0:53:19DIRECTOR ISSUES INSTRUCTIONS

0:53:24 > 0:53:28RAY WINSTONE: Is it teatime? Teatime. I can get a nice cup of tea.

0:53:30 > 0:53:33- What do you think so far then? - Oh, it's fucking great.

0:53:33 > 0:53:35It is really great. It's just a matter now

0:53:35 > 0:53:39just learning the rest of the words, being comfortable with the words

0:53:39 > 0:53:41and then performing, you know.

0:53:41 > 0:53:44But where they are in this, it's just fantastic, and the writing's great.

0:53:44 > 0:53:46- It is, isn't it? - I think it's brilliant.

0:53:46 > 0:53:47I'm actually very excited.

0:53:49 > 0:53:50Cup of tea time.

0:53:52 > 0:53:54Anyone got a fag?

0:53:54 > 0:53:57Anyone got any cigarettes? I nick a fag off someone.

0:53:57 > 0:53:59Oh, you're a governor.

0:53:59 > 0:54:02I would suggest the next two nights just, all of you,

0:54:02 > 0:54:06just go home and just go through the lines, go through the lines.

0:54:06 > 0:54:09Once you know them, then you can really fuck about with them, you know.

0:54:09 > 0:54:11And relax, cos it's brilliant.

0:54:11 > 0:54:14The writing's really good and all. The fucking writing's great.

0:54:16 > 0:54:19When you takes the drugs, how does it affect you remembering your lines

0:54:19 > 0:54:21and things like that?

0:54:21 > 0:54:25It's only, it's only a small part I can't remember. Two paragraphs.

0:54:25 > 0:54:27- Yeah, all right. - The rest of it I can remember.

0:54:27 > 0:54:29Right, but that will fix it?

0:54:29 > 0:54:31What I'm doing tomorrow, is I'm going to lay right off them.

0:54:31 > 0:54:33I'll be in agony and I'll be a twat.

0:54:33 > 0:54:36But you know them. It's just the drug that takes it away from you, yeah.

0:54:36 > 0:54:39I'm just going to try and man up tomorrow.

0:54:39 > 0:54:43You are a man. What are you talking about? Look at you! Look at you!

0:54:43 > 0:54:48SLOW, MELODIC MUSIC PLAYS

0:54:54 > 0:54:55It's a weird double feeling, isn't it?

0:54:55 > 0:54:58There's one part of me that can't wait to get to the Sunday night.

0:54:58 > 0:55:01Can't wait to see the lights come up and hear the audience coming in.

0:55:01 > 0:55:03And there's the other part of me

0:55:03 > 0:55:06that's absolutely shitting myself and wishing that we had another...

0:55:06 > 0:55:08another two months.

0:55:10 > 0:55:14- Can I say something before I go? Do you mind?- Of course. Absolutely.

0:55:14 > 0:55:16Listen up, boys.

0:55:16 > 0:55:19Chaps and girls. Very proud of what you've done today.

0:55:19 > 0:55:23I've seen something really... and I'm so up, I can't tell you. It's fantastic.

0:55:23 > 0:55:27But do me one favour. Right. And you can see it.

0:55:27 > 0:55:29When you know your lines,

0:55:29 > 0:55:32when you really know them, and you perform, you're fantastic.

0:55:32 > 0:55:35And when you see the eyes go dead when you're forgetting them,

0:55:35 > 0:55:39that's when you're losing the performance. And it's this time now.

0:55:39 > 0:55:42Right now, is when you've got to know your lines.

0:55:42 > 0:55:46Right. Because if you don't know your lines, you're letting your mate down.

0:55:46 > 0:55:50And this is a team. Just like it is in the Army, in the forces,

0:55:50 > 0:55:53this is a team. So do yourself a favour,

0:55:53 > 0:55:56do your mates a favour, go home and learn.

0:55:56 > 0:55:59I'm scared, I'm nervous. You know.

0:55:59 > 0:56:02It's a lot easier to storm a compound.

0:56:04 > 0:56:07It's, um... I'm nervous.

0:56:07 > 0:56:10There's a lot of responsibility.

0:56:10 > 0:56:13We have a lot of responsibility on that stage.

0:56:14 > 0:56:18It's not actually just, you know, the British forces we're representing,

0:56:18 > 0:56:21we're representing, kind of, all NATO forces,

0:56:21 > 0:56:25and everybody who's ever been involved in any conflict.

0:56:25 > 0:56:27It's a huge responsibility and that weight

0:56:27 > 0:56:30is starting to get on everybody's shoulder and so we go, you know,

0:56:30 > 0:56:33we're starting to band together and put our arms around each other

0:56:33 > 0:56:36so that... that weight doesn't feel like,

0:56:36 > 0:56:38well, as infinite as it actually is.

0:56:39 > 0:56:43You know, one minute, I'm in Afghan, the next minute I'm on the West End.

0:56:43 > 0:56:46So, the contrast is unreal.

0:56:49 > 0:56:50Yeah, it's craziness.

0:56:50 > 0:56:53There's no reason why I accepted to do this.

0:56:53 > 0:56:57It's just the sheer craziness of...

0:56:57 > 0:57:01oh, yeah, do you want to do this acting in front of 800 people

0:57:01 > 0:57:02on a West End stage?

0:57:05 > 0:57:08When I tell people, they're like, "No way!"

0:57:08 > 0:57:11And it's like, "Yeah, I'm going to."

0:57:11 > 0:57:14No, no, it won't happen, no. You'll bottle it, you won't do it.

0:57:14 > 0:57:16Yeah, I will trust me. It's going to be good.

0:57:18 > 0:57:20Look at that.

0:57:27 > 0:57:29God, that brings back memories.

0:57:46 > 0:57:49There are now only six days to go.

0:57:52 > 0:57:55I'm actually quite looking forward to it.

0:57:55 > 0:57:59A little bit nervous but 70% excited, about 30% nervous.

0:58:01 > 0:58:04It felt we were never going to move out of Brixton and now we're here.

0:58:04 > 0:58:07It's exciting. That is terrifying.

0:58:08 > 0:58:12You know when you meet like a really, really, really hot chick

0:58:12 > 0:58:14and you get a date?

0:58:14 > 0:58:17You're not sure if you're looking forward to it or you're scared,

0:58:17 > 0:58:21cos she's really hot, may be a little out of your league, so you're like "Oh, fuck! Oh, my God,

0:58:21 > 0:58:22"I've got to make sure I do this right

0:58:22 > 0:58:25"or I'll not get a second chance at this."

0:58:25 > 0:58:27That's kind of how I feel like. Yeah.

0:58:27 > 0:58:29That's kind of what I feel like.

0:58:29 > 0:58:33This is a really actory camp thing to say, and some of you will say,

0:58:33 > 0:58:35"What the fuck is he talking about?"

0:58:35 > 0:58:37But if you imagine that your heads

0:58:37 > 0:58:41and your thoughts are as big as this space.

0:58:42 > 0:58:43Quite empty!

0:58:43 > 0:58:46LAUGHTER

0:58:46 > 0:58:48Well, good, Dan! Spot on, mate.

0:58:48 > 0:58:50But all I'm saying is that in the rehearsal room

0:58:50 > 0:58:54it was kind of, you know, it was absolutely human space.

0:58:54 > 0:58:57We're in a bigger void now, OK.

0:58:57 > 0:59:00That leads me to another really important point.

0:59:01 > 0:59:04The way this show works, why it's so different,

0:59:04 > 0:59:07why it's so remarkable, why it's so unique,

0:59:07 > 0:59:12is because it's your voices as soldiers, telling your stories.

0:59:12 > 0:59:14The danger, let me warn you,

0:59:14 > 0:59:17is as you become more familiar with what

0:59:17 > 0:59:20you are doing you think, "Oh, I can now start acting.

0:59:20 > 0:59:23"I can now start pretending to be somebody else I'm not."

0:59:23 > 0:59:26That completely defeats the point of the show.

0:59:26 > 0:59:29You have to be yourselves.

0:59:29 > 0:59:32The big ask is for the people who are the professional actors,

0:59:32 > 0:59:34who are not soldiers, to blend with you.

0:59:34 > 0:59:36It's not about you coming up to them,

0:59:36 > 0:59:39it's about them blending to what you're doing, OK?

0:59:39 > 0:59:41So the audience will think was that a real soldier?

0:59:41 > 0:59:44Was that person a real soldier, or were they an actor?

0:59:44 > 0:59:49So look, what we should do, guys, is stand by

0:59:49 > 0:59:51to go into the common room,

0:59:51 > 0:59:53so where does the bed come from,

0:59:53 > 0:59:56where do your chairs come from? Get yourselves sorted out,

0:59:56 > 0:59:58work out where those positions will be.

0:59:59 > 1:00:02It's the first rehearsal on stage,

1:00:02 > 1:00:05but as so often with Bravo 22 Company,

1:00:05 > 1:00:08there are complications.

1:00:08 > 1:00:10I woke up this morning and I can't...

1:00:10 > 1:00:15I'm not really passing urine and I think my super-pubic catheter

1:00:15 > 1:00:17which is in me stomach, is blocked.

1:00:17 > 1:00:20That's my main problem, just to get it like flushed out

1:00:20 > 1:00:23or get it changed as soon as possible, and just crack on.

1:00:25 > 1:00:26Is Liam with us?

1:00:26 > 1:00:28I don't see him.

1:00:30 > 1:00:31Liam!

1:00:31 > 1:00:35Well, where is he? He's not on stage. I need him on stage now.

1:00:35 > 1:00:37Of course we're here in the theatre,

1:00:37 > 1:00:41but some of the old problems are still dogging us.

1:00:41 > 1:00:43Jack has just been really sick outside,

1:00:43 > 1:00:46he's in lots of pain because he hurt his stump last week.

1:00:46 > 1:00:50He was in hospital over the weekend. Liam isn't here.

1:00:50 > 1:00:53Apparently he's about to arrive but you know,

1:00:53 > 1:00:57so... those other issues that you wouldn't normally be coping with

1:00:57 > 1:00:59in a normal production,

1:00:59 > 1:01:02we are still having to cope with.

1:01:03 > 1:01:08"He is here," doesn't work unless I see him.

1:01:08 > 1:01:10Alice, look, I don't hang one on

1:01:10 > 1:01:14but there's nothing to worry about, it's fine.

1:01:14 > 1:01:15I'm here now.

1:01:15 > 1:01:19Liam is hungover. He's been up all night drinking.

1:01:19 > 1:01:22He's making his excuses to Alice, the producer.

1:01:22 > 1:01:26Obviously, obviously, alcohol is something I have to deal with myself.

1:01:26 > 1:01:28'You've got a whole company around...'

1:01:28 > 1:01:30I know I've got a whole company

1:01:30 > 1:01:32but it still don't stop me from going out

1:01:32 > 1:01:34and, obviously, losing my mind, does it?

1:01:34 > 1:01:39- Is Liam around there?- Er, no. He's upstairs in his changing room.

1:01:39 > 1:01:40Upstairs, yeah?

1:01:42 > 1:01:45OK, who's missed their entrance?

1:01:45 > 1:01:48Come on, guys, let's get our shit together, come on!

1:01:48 > 1:01:51If one of you's not there the whole thing is fucked up.

1:01:51 > 1:01:54Honestly, this show, obviously, means a lot to me, more...

1:01:54 > 1:01:57- more than you can imagine really. - 'I know it does...'

1:01:57 > 1:01:59Look, I know it's my downfall,

1:01:59 > 1:02:02but it's what the show is all about, isn't it?

1:02:02 > 1:02:03'Yeah, I know...'

1:02:03 > 1:02:06Honestly, mate, if there's anything else that we can do to help,

1:02:06 > 1:02:08you know, just let us know,

1:02:08 > 1:02:11cos, as you said, it is about what this whole play's about

1:02:11 > 1:02:15but at this, you know, we're here to help.

1:02:15 > 1:02:17Let me just flush this play out.

1:02:17 > 1:02:21Guys, we will go back to the beginning of this, so off you go again.

1:02:21 > 1:02:25Finally, an hour late, Liam makes it to the stage.

1:02:25 > 1:02:28So, same spot, Jamie. Thank you, mate.

1:02:28 > 1:02:32Taff, going into Liam, please. Thank you, here we go...

1:02:32 > 1:02:34It's not the first time he's gone missing.

1:02:34 > 1:02:37Struggling with post-traumatic stress,

1:02:37 > 1:02:39Liam's been finding solace in drink.

1:02:39 > 1:02:42..just walk into it...

1:02:42 > 1:02:45I'll just go out on the piss all day. I don't give a fuck.

1:02:45 > 1:02:47Then I'll get wound up by something small

1:02:47 > 1:02:50and I'll just want to smash something up...or someone.

1:02:50 > 1:02:52Only when you drink?

1:02:52 > 1:02:53Drink makes it worse.

1:02:53 > 1:02:57The anger's there all the time. There's little images, like...

1:02:59 > 1:03:03..fucking, I don't know, when an IED blew my mate's hands off.

1:03:03 > 1:03:05The look in his eyes...

1:03:05 > 1:03:08There's a growing concern that Liam, living out his part,

1:03:08 > 1:03:11could put the whole show at risk.

1:03:11 > 1:03:14I'm aware that the play is actually causing things to resurface

1:03:14 > 1:03:18and also he's having a hard time, I think, erm...in his personal life.

1:03:18 > 1:03:19So I understand that but...

1:03:19 > 1:03:22so many good things are happening with this production now,

1:03:22 > 1:03:24we can't allow one person to jeopardize it.

1:03:24 > 1:03:28Also he's got his sister's wedding tomorrow, after the dress rehearsal,

1:03:28 > 1:03:31and, I mean, I'm now just personally worried about,

1:03:31 > 1:03:36you know, he needs to turn up sharp and focused on Sunday at 2.30.

1:03:38 > 1:03:41I will definitely be back Saturday night.

1:03:42 > 1:03:44Early night, ready for Sunday morning.

1:03:44 > 1:03:47You going to say on the orange juice, or what?

1:03:47 > 1:03:51I may have a couple of beers but nothing like I did last night.

1:03:53 > 1:03:57Yeah, it's unfortunate that he couldn't make it on time this morning

1:03:57 > 1:03:59and, after all, in the Corp we do pride ourselves on, you know,

1:03:59 > 1:04:04being where you're supposed to be when you're supposed to be there, with what you're supposed to have,

1:04:04 > 1:04:07but, at the end of the day, you know, he's got demons that he's got to battle with.

1:04:07 > 1:04:11Combat exhaustion. Shell shock...

1:04:11 > 1:04:13The reality is, is that everybody wants to say,

1:04:13 > 1:04:15"Yeah, yeah it's terrible not showing up when he does,"

1:04:15 > 1:04:19but the reality is, is that if he wasn't doing what he was doing would he be here at all?

1:04:19 > 1:04:22In the sense that, you know, would he even show up?

1:04:22 > 1:04:25So, if this is what he has to do to keep himself together

1:04:25 > 1:04:27then fucking A, Royal, do what you've got to do

1:04:27 > 1:04:29but just, you know, get the job done.

1:04:29 > 1:04:31He's got a wedding on Saturday.

1:04:31 > 1:04:34Oh, fuck!

1:04:34 > 1:04:36- HE LAUGHS - Jesus. Oh!

1:04:36 > 1:04:38'..combat stress reaction,'

1:04:38 > 1:04:42post-combat disorder, post-war disorder,

1:04:42 > 1:04:45post-traumatic illness, post-traumatic disorder...

1:04:48 > 1:04:50..post-traumatic stress disorder.

1:04:57 > 1:04:59- I need Cass and Sam. - I'm here, buddy!

1:04:59 > 1:05:01- Good.- Here...

1:05:01 > 1:05:04Our producer's been off for the last couple of days,

1:05:04 > 1:05:06sick with something rather unpleasant,

1:05:06 > 1:05:09and it seems that she may...

1:05:09 > 1:05:11may have infected a couple of the company members before she left!

1:05:11 > 1:05:14- There's a slight irony there. - Yes, indeed, there is.

1:05:14 > 1:05:17My eyes are killing me, my nose is blocked,

1:05:17 > 1:05:21my throat is killing me and my body just feels drained.

1:05:21 > 1:05:26My head's pounding, my stomach's...not feeling great.

1:05:26 > 1:05:29I keep coughing...up puke, which isn't very nice.

1:05:31 > 1:05:35- How much do you think I'm going to be sick?- A bucketful! THEY LAUGH

1:05:35 > 1:05:38They do say there is this expression, "doctor theatre,"

1:05:38 > 1:05:41that people will pull through, but we'll just have to see.

1:05:41 > 1:05:44I mean, I can't have people throwing up on stage, that wouldn't be right.

1:05:45 > 1:05:47HE RETCHES VIOLENTLY

1:05:53 > 1:05:55HE RETCHES VIOLENTLY

1:05:56 > 1:06:00I just helped to carry out a bucket which had sick leaking from the bottom of it

1:06:00 > 1:06:03and then we had to wash it on the street

1:06:03 > 1:06:05but I think Dan, I think he'll carry on,

1:06:05 > 1:06:07I think he's going to do it, so...

1:06:07 > 1:06:08- ALL:- My weapon, myself!

1:06:08 > 1:06:12# Ba-da-bom-bom-bom! # Salute. OK, hold it.

1:06:12 > 1:06:15So, Colin, we've got some horrible bass rumbling

1:06:15 > 1:06:16going on at the bottom of that...

1:06:16 > 1:06:19I just thought, "I've got a bag of drugs here."

1:06:19 > 1:06:22Apparently Lyndon's been ill,

1:06:22 > 1:06:29so we've got Lemsips, Strepsils, Ibroprufen, Dioralyte, erm...

1:06:29 > 1:06:35If anyone has felt as awful as I felt then they need lots of drugs.

1:06:36 > 1:06:42An hour or so later, Dan, always a trooper, prepares to go on stage.

1:06:42 > 1:06:44- My weapon, myself! - My weapon, myself!

1:06:44 > 1:06:46- My weapon, myself! ALL:- My weapon, myself!

1:06:49 > 1:06:51EXPLOSION BOOMS

1:06:54 > 1:06:56FUCK, are you all right, mate?

1:06:56 > 1:06:57Yeah, yeah, I'm good.

1:06:57 > 1:06:59Yeah, you fucking look it, mate(!)

1:06:59 > 1:07:02You're going to be all right, mate. You're going to be all right.

1:07:02 > 1:07:05- Oh, fuck! Oh, FUCK! - HE SCREAMS

1:07:05 > 1:07:08You're going to be fine, you're going to be fine.

1:07:08 > 1:07:11You've still got your balls, mate, they're still there.

1:07:11 > 1:07:13I'm going to fucking die. Give me a FUCKING cigarette!

1:07:13 > 1:07:15You are not going to die.

1:07:15 > 1:07:18I can't give you a fag, mate, I can't....

1:07:18 > 1:07:21'I feel a little bit better, though, I feel a little bit better.'

1:07:21 > 1:07:25Alice just keeps giving me loads of drugs, so, you know.

1:07:25 > 1:07:27I know I'm getting a little bit better.

1:07:27 > 1:07:29My headache's still there, my sore throat's still here,

1:07:29 > 1:07:31I've still got a cold.

1:07:31 > 1:07:33My mouth's always dry, my body's aching,

1:07:33 > 1:07:37'but they're all saying that the being blowing up scene

1:07:37 > 1:07:39'was the best I've done so far.'

1:07:39 > 1:07:42Sorry, no, just relax there, we're just lighting it, just hold on...

1:07:42 > 1:07:45Whilst Dan is upping one sort of medication,

1:07:45 > 1:07:49most of the cast, already on a cocktail of pain-killing drugs,

1:07:49 > 1:07:53are having to reduce their intake to keep their heads clear for the show.

1:07:53 > 1:07:56..make it two. OK, lights will go down much quicker, here we go, guys.

1:07:56 > 1:07:58Just go back a cue.

1:07:58 > 1:08:01Just in time for round two.

1:08:01 > 1:08:02Slower.

1:08:02 > 1:08:05# Codeine, tramadol, Ventolin

1:08:05 > 1:08:09# Paracetamol, LSD... #

1:08:09 > 1:08:14'The Paracetamol's obviously a very effective pain killer, sudamenafin.'

1:08:14 > 1:08:19Erm, the ranitidine, again, protects the stomach from the diclofenac,

1:08:19 > 1:08:22which is non-steroidal anti-inflammatory,

1:08:22 > 1:08:24and tramadol is a synthetic opiate.

1:08:24 > 1:08:28Erm, pregabalin, that's for nerve pain,

1:08:28 > 1:08:34to do with my back and, obviously, phantom pain.

1:08:35 > 1:08:37# ..paracetamol, LSD... #

1:08:37 > 1:08:40'I cut my medication in half for the performance

1:08:40 > 1:08:45'cos I didn't want to, you know, a medically-induced coma on stage!'

1:08:45 > 1:08:47'So it's a little bit more discomfort'

1:08:47 > 1:08:49but I can live with it and that's, kind of, healthier

1:08:49 > 1:08:54than putting this colossal amount of pharmaceuticals into my body.

1:08:55 > 1:08:58'If you get the right combination of drugs right

1:08:58 > 1:09:02there shouldn't be a disruption and that's the fucking goal.

1:09:02 > 1:09:05'And I should be able to take the drugs that I need to take,'

1:09:05 > 1:09:09drive, I should be able to go for a run...ish.

1:09:09 > 1:09:12I should be able to drink - well, not really

1:09:12 > 1:09:16but I should just be able to live normally, function normally

1:09:16 > 1:09:18'and not feel any discomfort.

1:09:18 > 1:09:20'And as my body gets used to the discomfort,

1:09:20 > 1:09:23'I slowly reduce the drugs and the next thing you know,'

1:09:23 > 1:09:26the only I'm missing is a leg! Ha!

1:09:34 > 1:09:37OK. Dan, just hold that...

1:09:37 > 1:09:40hold the jazz hands for just a beat longer, to the music...

1:09:40 > 1:09:42'I thought the guys did a really, really good job'

1:09:42 > 1:09:44in that, in that dress.

1:09:44 > 1:09:46People like Dan - I mean, he's feeling terrible I know.

1:09:46 > 1:09:51I mean, I had the bug he's got now and he REALLY performed well.

1:09:51 > 1:09:54'The technical staff now, actually, has to meet our cast.

1:09:54 > 1:09:58'No-one's fault, we could do with another week, you know.'

1:09:58 > 1:10:02But isn't it amazing that I'm worrying about technical dramatic detail

1:10:02 > 1:10:04with a bunch of guys I met two and a half months ago

1:10:04 > 1:10:07- who...were squaddies?- Absolutely.

1:10:07 > 1:10:11- Mate... I know you're going to this wedding.- Yes.

1:10:11 > 1:10:15Please, priorities are that you are here 12 o'clock tomorrow...

1:10:15 > 1:10:17compos mentis...

1:10:17 > 1:10:18Sober.

1:10:18 > 1:10:20Sober, not hungover.

1:10:20 > 1:10:23Please, just, you know, next 24 hours, really important.

1:10:23 > 1:10:25Really important for the company, mate, all right?

1:10:25 > 1:10:29- Yeah, I'll be here sober.- On record. All right, OK, good, take care.

1:10:29 > 1:10:31- Have a good time!- OK.

1:10:31 > 1:10:33See you, Liam. Be good!

1:10:49 > 1:10:54'The time is now ten to one on the morning of January 22nd,'

1:10:54 > 1:10:57so we're already on the day of the Bravo 22 performance,

1:10:57 > 1:11:00and I'm just here at the Union Jack Club, erm,

1:11:00 > 1:11:02waiting for Liam to come back from his sister's wedding.

1:11:02 > 1:11:07I wouldn't necessarily say that this is normally the writer's job...

1:11:07 > 1:11:11but because so much is at stake for...so many people...

1:11:12 > 1:11:14..you know, it's just...

1:11:14 > 1:11:17I think...it does no harm just to really make sure

1:11:17 > 1:11:20that, erm, Liam gets his beauty sleep.

1:11:27 > 1:11:28How you doing?

1:11:28 > 1:11:30Yeah, it was really good actually.

1:11:30 > 1:11:31- Good.- I'm back!

1:11:31 > 1:11:34- Well, done, mate.- It's very, very good to see you back.

1:11:34 > 1:11:36Yeah, cab's going to try and park his car.

1:11:36 > 1:11:38- How was it, how was it? - I'm back, mate.

1:11:38 > 1:11:40I've been to the wedding, now I'm back.

1:11:41 > 1:11:44Sleep well, sleep well. I'll see you tomorrow morning.

1:11:44 > 1:11:47Everyone should have had more faith in me.

1:11:47 > 1:11:50Thank you for being here.

1:11:50 > 1:11:53Owen, come on. You could always believe in me.

1:11:53 > 1:11:57I know. I never doubted you, never doubted you!

1:11:57 > 1:11:59- I'll see you bright and early.- Yeah.

1:12:09 > 1:12:11Look, this is what we've been working for

1:12:11 > 1:12:14for two months, you know? This is it! The day has arrived.

1:12:14 > 1:12:16So I just want you to go out there...

1:12:16 > 1:12:20- I am so proud of all of you, you've done FANTASTICALLY. - I'm proud of you, Steve.

1:12:20 > 1:12:22- No, thanks, mate. Thank you. - THEY ALL LAUGH

1:12:22 > 1:12:24But no you've done fantastically.

1:12:24 > 1:12:27And all I want you to do is do yourselves justice today, OK?

1:12:27 > 1:12:29But go out there and slay 'em!

1:12:29 > 1:12:30THEY CHEER AND APPLAUD

1:12:30 > 1:12:33'Good evening, ladies and gents, of the Bravo 22 Company,'

1:12:33 > 1:12:36this is your half our call, you have 30 minutes,

1:12:36 > 1:12:39'this is your half hour call you have 30 minutes. Thank you.'

1:12:39 > 1:12:43'I don't think I would be any more ready than I am.

1:12:43 > 1:12:46'It's here now, this is it, so...'

1:12:46 > 1:12:52whatever is to be still done, I think the stage will do it for me.

1:12:52 > 1:12:54Dan, just very quickly, how are you feeling today?

1:12:54 > 1:12:55I feel better.

1:12:55 > 1:12:59Erm, my headache's gone, my eyes are back to normal,

1:12:59 > 1:13:03I didn't put my contacts in because I didn't want to irritate them.

1:13:03 > 1:13:07Cold's gone down a little bit but I still have a sore throat.

1:13:08 > 1:13:10I went to bed last night

1:13:10 > 1:13:14praying that Liam would come back from his wedding.

1:13:14 > 1:13:16I got a text through at, well, one something,

1:13:16 > 1:13:18saying he was there, which was good, so that's great.

1:13:18 > 1:13:20And then I woke up this morning and felt a bit numb,

1:13:20 > 1:13:24and then I got in the taxi and started explaining what I was doing and started to cry!

1:13:27 > 1:13:30'Good evening, ladies and gentlemen of the Bravo 22 Company.

1:13:30 > 1:13:33'This is your five minute call, you have five minutes. Thank you.'

1:13:33 > 1:13:37Here we go! Let's take it!

1:13:38 > 1:13:41'If this goes off in a really, really good direction,'

1:13:41 > 1:13:44then I've got no problems publicly thanking the Taliban

1:13:44 > 1:13:48for taking my leg and giving me an opportunity to get on the West End!

1:13:53 > 1:13:56'Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Will you please take your seats?

1:13:56 > 1:13:58'This evening's performance is about to begin.'

1:14:09 > 1:14:11SINISTER MUSIC

1:14:19 > 1:14:21HELCOPTER HUMMING

1:14:25 > 1:14:27EXPLOSION BOOMS

1:14:32 > 1:14:34HEART MONITOR BEEPING

1:14:45 > 1:14:46What's your name?

1:14:47 > 1:14:49Fuck you.

1:14:49 > 1:14:50You're in Birmingham, in hospital...

1:14:50 > 1:14:54- Fuck off, you Taliban bitch. - Can you remember your name?- HELP!

1:14:54 > 1:14:57- SHOUTS: Help me, I'm in here! - You're in Selly Oak Hospital.

1:14:57 > 1:15:00- Help me, please. I'm a British soldier!- Can you remember your name?

1:15:00 > 1:15:03Help me! ANA. ANA.

1:15:03 > 1:15:07HELP! Help me, over here. Help me, please!

1:15:07 > 1:15:09Radio my position!

1:15:09 > 1:15:11Ahh-ha-ha!

1:15:11 > 1:15:15# I'm Henry the eighth, I am. HE SOBS

1:15:15 > 1:15:19# Henry the eighth I am, I am

1:15:19 > 1:15:21# I got married to the... #

1:15:21 > 1:15:24You fucking traitor.

1:15:24 > 1:15:26You fucking turncoat! When I tell your fucking...

1:15:26 > 1:15:29'PO 56 zero 85 Mike.'

1:15:29 > 1:15:31Corporal Charles Fallon, aged 27.

1:15:31 > 1:15:35B Company, 22 Commando, Royal Marines.

1:15:35 > 1:15:40Injured in Nadiali North, on the 28th May, 2011...

1:15:40 > 1:15:4625 zero 44 898, Rifleman Leroy Jenkins, aged 20, fourth Battalion...

1:15:46 > 1:15:48Ninth Parachute Squadron, Royal Engineers...

1:15:48 > 1:15:50P zero 63703 Golf...

1:15:50 > 1:15:53Lance Corporal Chris Brown, aged 21, Coldstream Guards...

1:15:53 > 1:15:57251 zero 8692, Sgt...

1:15:57 > 1:16:02SHOUTS: Oi, you lot, get fell in! Don't be scared of a fucking line.

1:16:03 > 1:16:06Oi, you, you scraggy little shit, put that fucking fag out.

1:16:06 > 1:16:08You, stand up straight.

1:16:08 > 1:16:11Oi, put your fucking hoodie down, you're in a new gang now.

1:16:11 > 1:16:14- Pinkie and Perky, put that fucking phone away.- Sorry, Serg.

1:16:14 > 1:16:15Serg?

1:16:16 > 1:16:20Serg? Would you like me to massage your passage with my sausage?

1:16:20 > 1:16:22I'm a bombardier, shitlips.

1:16:22 > 1:16:25And what are you fucking laughing at?

1:16:25 > 1:16:27You, get a haircut.

1:16:27 > 1:16:29You, go to Specsavers.

1:16:29 > 1:16:31You think I'm fucking funny, do you?

1:16:31 > 1:16:34We'll see about that, sonny boy, won't we?

1:16:35 > 1:16:43# I sing because I'm happy

1:16:43 > 1:16:50# I sing because I'm free

1:16:50 > 1:17:00# For his eyes are over all of us

1:17:00 > 1:17:08# And I know he watches me... #

1:17:10 > 1:17:13# Feel the burn, enjoy the pain

1:17:13 > 1:17:18- # Feel the burn! - Pain is pleasure, tell your brain

1:17:18 > 1:17:19# Feel the burn!

1:17:19 > 1:17:24- # You're alive so pain is gain - Feel the burn! #

1:17:24 > 1:17:26'When I was seven I had a dream.'

1:17:26 > 1:17:28I was going to live where the Queen lived

1:17:28 > 1:17:30and I was going to be a soldier.

1:17:30 > 1:17:34I had seen her when she came for Independence day.

1:17:34 > 1:17:37We all were lining the streets of San Fernando waving

1:17:37 > 1:17:39and she waved back.

1:17:39 > 1:17:43She had on a pink hat and a matching suit.

1:17:43 > 1:17:47As she was waving I was shouting,

1:17:47 > 1:17:52"I'm going to live where you live. I'm going to live where you live."

1:17:52 > 1:17:56We'd always be watching the atmospherics.

1:17:56 > 1:17:58You see the women and children start to leave,

1:17:58 > 1:18:00or some bloke might be dicking you.

1:18:00 > 1:18:02We'd go for them straight away.

1:18:02 > 1:18:05On my second tour we never saw them. Not once.

1:18:05 > 1:18:07It was like fighting ghosts.

1:18:07 > 1:18:11You might see a muzzle flash or a puff of smoke but that's all.

1:18:11 > 1:18:13When we did night ops,

1:18:13 > 1:18:17sometimes they'd communicate by howling like animals, like dogs.

1:18:17 > 1:18:19That could be pretty scary.

1:18:19 > 1:18:20EXPLOSIONS AND GUNFIRE

1:18:26 > 1:18:31When we leave Afghan a little bit of Afghan stays with us.

1:18:31 > 1:18:33Or us with it.

1:18:34 > 1:18:37MUSIC: "Hope There's Someone" By Antony and the Johnsons

1:19:32 > 1:19:35# And godsend I don't want to go

1:19:35 > 1:19:42# To the seal's watershed

1:19:43 > 1:19:46# Hope there's someone Who'll take care of me... #

1:19:46 > 1:19:49Yeah, we're leaving the services,

1:19:49 > 1:19:53but we're also joining one of the oldest regiments there is.

1:19:53 > 1:19:56The Regiment of the Wounded.

1:19:56 > 1:19:59It's got an illustrious history that goes back to the beginning

1:19:59 > 1:20:03of mankind and you may not be familiar with all its victories,

1:20:03 > 1:20:05but take my word for it, there's thousands.

1:20:07 > 1:20:09Millions, even.

1:20:09 > 1:20:13And they're winning every day in hospitals, in streets,

1:20:13 > 1:20:16in bedrooms, living rooms.

1:20:16 > 1:20:17Up here.

1:20:19 > 1:20:25And the regimental rank and file are recruited from all over the world.

1:20:25 > 1:20:30Britain, America, Canada, Africa, Iraq, Afghanistan.

1:20:30 > 1:20:33Men, women, children and it's growing.

1:20:35 > 1:20:37Even now as we speak it's growing.

1:20:37 > 1:20:40And as long as we keep fighting, it's going to keep growing,

1:20:40 > 1:20:43but it's deploying too.

1:20:43 > 1:20:45Not to a battlefield or a base,

1:20:45 > 1:20:51but well, to you out there.

1:20:53 > 1:20:56We've been training for that deployment.

1:20:56 > 1:20:59We've been getting ready for it, and now you know, we are.

1:21:01 > 1:21:04And we really hope that you are too.

1:21:04 > 1:21:07Cos we don't live in two worlds, do we?

1:21:12 > 1:21:19No, no, we live in one and don't you ever forget it.

1:21:40 > 1:21:46CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1:21:56 > 1:22:01CHEERING

1:22:08 > 1:22:10SPEECH DROWNED BY CHEERS

1:22:37 > 1:22:41THEY CHEER

1:22:42 > 1:22:47INDISTINCT CHATTER

1:22:53 > 1:22:57CHEERING AND CHATTER

1:23:02 > 1:23:03A smash.

1:23:03 > 1:23:05- I'm coming.- It's great.

1:23:05 > 1:23:07Fantastic.

1:23:07 > 1:23:09So brilliant.

1:23:10 > 1:23:13I'm very happy that that's done now!

1:23:13 > 1:23:14THEY LAUGH

1:23:14 > 1:23:16All right, everybody, get on the drink now!

1:23:16 > 1:23:18I can't! I'm driving!

1:23:18 > 1:23:22I'm so proud of you, guys. Excellent.

1:23:22 > 1:23:26We've just walked out of it, so I'm pretty much unable to speak.

1:23:26 > 1:23:28It was incredibly moving.

1:23:28 > 1:23:30And incredibly important for us in the audience,

1:23:30 > 1:23:35us civilians, to understand what actually is going on in our name.

1:23:35 > 1:23:38What our... what our military are doing for us.

1:23:38 > 1:23:41It was very, very funny, very, very touching

1:23:41 > 1:23:44and I think everybody should see it.

1:23:46 > 1:23:49It would be a real shame if this died now.

1:23:49 > 1:23:52It's... everybody on this side of the curtain,

1:23:52 > 1:23:55I don't know what's going on, I can't see what's going on out there

1:23:55 > 1:23:59right now, but everybody on this side, um, it's pretty emotional

1:23:59 > 1:24:02and it's probably the most emotion they've felt in a long time.

1:24:02 > 1:24:04It's a lot of life back here, it's good.

1:24:04 > 1:24:08It all... it makes me angry cos it's...

1:24:08 > 1:24:12there's these beautiful people going out there

1:24:12 > 1:24:14in an unwinnable situation and losing limbs and...

1:24:14 > 1:24:16and lives and...

1:24:16 > 1:24:20and minds and relationships,

1:24:20 > 1:24:23because you know, that's what destroys me.

1:24:23 > 1:24:28People come up and say to me about enjoying, did I enjoy it?

1:24:28 > 1:24:31That's not what it... I don't know, because it's you.

1:24:31 > 1:24:33It's the most...

1:24:33 > 1:24:37It's the most magnificent piece of theatre I've ever seen.

1:24:37 > 1:24:40Come here, you're going to burst out on me here. Come here.

1:24:40 > 1:24:41I was just swept away.

1:24:41 > 1:24:45I thought I was watching a professional experience.

1:24:45 > 1:24:49And yet the authenticity of what was happening was more

1:24:49 > 1:24:54extraordinary than we can ever encounter when professionals

1:24:54 > 1:24:59are talking about the subject of war and the aftermath of war.

1:24:59 > 1:25:03The authenticity of this was so, so deeply emotional.

1:25:03 > 1:25:05It was a profound experience.

1:25:05 > 1:25:08Did you enjoy yourself, love?

1:25:08 > 1:25:11Oh, darling, yes. I'm just saying I can't believe it.

1:25:11 > 1:25:14You're going to do us out of business, you know.

1:25:14 > 1:25:17More laughs than in the Carry Ons, weren't there?

1:25:17 > 1:25:19And you have got a wonderful sense of humour.

1:25:19 > 1:25:22They thought they was going into a new world in a way,

1:25:22 > 1:25:26the kind of namby-pamby world of theatre.

1:25:26 > 1:25:28I think they found out really quickly

1:25:28 > 1:25:30that it ain't like that at all.

1:25:30 > 1:25:33But they had the discipline and the bottle to go and do that.

1:25:33 > 1:25:36But the confidence they've gained over the last few weeks,

1:25:36 > 1:25:39that will stand them in good stead for the rest of their life.

1:25:39 > 1:25:42And I think that's the important thing.

1:25:42 > 1:25:45Tearful. Tearful.

1:25:45 > 1:25:49It was more than I even thought,

1:25:49 > 1:25:51more than I even dreamed about.

1:25:51 > 1:25:57My dream to me was just a dream and I'm probably, I'm living it,

1:25:57 > 1:26:00but this was never in the dream and it's...

1:26:00 > 1:26:03it's come to pass, so it's awesome, really, really, really good.

1:26:03 > 1:26:05I'm ecstatic.

1:26:05 > 1:26:08I think the boys did a fantastic job tonight, and the girls.

1:26:08 > 1:26:09I think it was...

1:26:09 > 1:26:13Oh, it was so beyond my wildest dreams of what

1:26:13 > 1:26:16they could achieve at the beginning of the process and so I...

1:26:16 > 1:26:19I just feel very, very emotional

1:26:19 > 1:26:24and no, they did a fantastic job and I'm really pleased for them.

1:26:24 > 1:26:26Really pleased for them. Thank you, Chris.

1:26:26 > 1:26:28Thank you. It's tough.

1:26:35 > 1:26:36Yeah, I mean...

1:26:37 > 1:26:38- Sorry.- Sorry.

1:26:38 > 1:26:40Go that way.

1:26:42 > 1:26:44Yeah, I mean there have been times in this

1:26:44 > 1:26:46when I wasn't sure we'd do it.

1:26:46 > 1:26:51And I can't believe that this company only formed two months ago

1:26:51 > 1:26:52for the first rehearsal.

1:26:52 > 1:26:55And I felt a massive, massive duty of care.

1:26:55 > 1:26:57I was very worried I wasn't going to be able to write something

1:26:57 > 1:26:59that would do justice to them.

1:26:59 > 1:27:02And I think I've only just now actually realised

1:27:02 > 1:27:03how stressful I found it.

1:27:03 > 1:27:06But the transformation in everyone in those two months and the way

1:27:06 > 1:27:09that they played it today is just extraordinary and honestly,

1:27:09 > 1:27:12they're sort of unrecognisable to the individuals I met.

1:27:12 > 1:27:15So yeah, I'm very, I'm very happy, very happy indeed

1:27:15 > 1:27:17and I'm hoping that this last show's actually the start of...

1:27:17 > 1:27:19is a start of something.

1:27:19 > 1:27:20Yeah. A new beginning.

1:27:20 > 1:27:23Absolutely and not the end. The beginning, yeah, I hope so.

1:27:23 > 1:27:29I am one member of a huge sold-out audience who've had an experience

1:27:29 > 1:27:33that they will never, never, never forget for the whole of their lives.

1:27:33 > 1:27:35APPLAUSE

1:27:35 > 1:27:38- I just want to say stop it at once! - LAUGHTER

1:27:38 > 1:27:41You can't take over the theatrical profession like this.

1:27:41 > 1:27:43You can't make acting look...

1:27:43 > 1:27:46You can't make acting look so fucking easy!

1:27:46 > 1:27:47LAUGHTER

1:27:47 > 1:27:48Just stop it!

1:27:48 > 1:27:50LAUGHTER

1:27:53 > 1:27:57# Hope there's someone Who'll take care of me... #

1:27:57 > 1:28:01'The Two Worlds Of Charlie F was such a resounding success

1:28:01 > 1:28:07'that it's now touring the country, starting in Birmingham on July 19th.

1:28:07 > 1:28:10'And the film version of the final play can be seen on the free

1:28:10 > 1:28:15'Digital Arts Service at thespace.org from tonight.

1:28:15 > 1:28:19'For more details go to the BBC Imagine website.'

1:28:19 > 1:28:22Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd