Hearts in the Highlands

Hearts in the Highlands

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0:00:02 > 0:00:05We first got television in Scotland in 1952. 1952!

0:00:05 > 0:00:07That's year the Queen became, well, Queen,

0:00:07 > 0:00:10Prime Minister Winston Churchill scrapped identity cards,

0:00:10 > 0:00:14the first-ever passenger jet flew across the Atlantic,

0:00:14 > 0:00:16the Americans set off the first H-bomb

0:00:16 > 0:00:20and Vladimir Putin, Roseanne Barr and Joe Strummer were all born.

0:00:24 > 0:00:26To different mothers, obviously.

0:00:40 > 0:00:41# Step we gaily on we go

0:00:41 > 0:00:44# Heel for a heel and toe for a toe

0:00:44 > 0:00:47# Arm in arm and row and row

0:00:47 > 0:00:48# All for Mhairi's wedding

0:00:48 > 0:00:51# Plenty herring, plenty meal

0:00:51 > 0:00:53# Plenty people to fill her creel

0:00:53 > 0:00:56# Plenty bonny bairns as weel

0:00:56 > 0:00:59# That's our toast for Mhairi... #

0:00:59 > 0:01:01Sorry.

0:01:01 > 0:01:04There's something about this Scottish landscape

0:01:04 > 0:01:06that always brings a tune out in me.

0:01:06 > 0:01:11It's a landscape of extreme behaviour and extreme rugged beauty.

0:01:11 > 0:01:13Since the dawn of televisual time,

0:01:13 > 0:01:16programme makers have been drawn here

0:01:16 > 0:01:19to conduct crazy social experiments,

0:01:19 > 0:01:21to test the limits of human endurance.

0:01:21 > 0:01:27And to film the crazy, beautiful, mysterious, blue-skinned natives.

0:01:27 > 0:01:31And, thanks to telly, us Scots have been able to enjoy all of this

0:01:31 > 0:01:34from the very comfort of our own armchairs.

0:01:40 > 0:01:42In the 1960s, a BBC film crew travelled to the

0:01:42 > 0:01:45remote and beautiful Scottish island of Harris

0:01:45 > 0:01:48and followed the only remaining child in his village,

0:01:48 > 0:01:50Donnie MacSween.

0:01:50 > 0:01:54Watch how they present the idyllic rural culture

0:01:54 > 0:01:57under threat from some strange new forces.

0:01:57 > 0:02:00'Top Of The Pops is a programme I watch.

0:02:00 > 0:02:03'The disc-jockey is the man introducing them.

0:02:03 > 0:02:05'Sometimes it's Alan Freeman or Peter Murray,

0:02:05 > 0:02:07'Jimmy Savile or David Jacobs'.

0:02:09 > 0:02:13This touching portrait of an innocent island child of the '60s

0:02:13 > 0:02:16asks many questions about the future for the Islanders.

0:02:16 > 0:02:19And even the influence television itself

0:02:19 > 0:02:21was having on rural depopulation.

0:02:23 > 0:02:26The question was, would Donnie's heart stay in the islands?

0:02:29 > 0:02:32'When I grow up, I think I would like to be an artist

0:02:32 > 0:02:35'because I'm very fond of drawing pictures in school.

0:02:35 > 0:02:38'It is mostly scenery I like to paint.

0:02:38 > 0:02:42'If I was going to be an artist, I would have to go to Tarbert School.

0:02:42 > 0:02:46'And if I'd pass all my exams I'd go to Inverness Academy'.

0:02:46 > 0:02:51Once I had finished filming and that had been transmitted,

0:02:51 > 0:02:56I continued in school, then went to Inverness then to the city,

0:02:56 > 0:02:59to the bright lights that I was seeing on television

0:02:59 > 0:03:01all these years ago. I was in Glasgow.

0:03:01 > 0:03:07And having sort of bathed in city practices and drank too much,

0:03:07 > 0:03:13more than was good for me, I found an emptiness in myself.

0:03:13 > 0:03:18I thought that all these things, the material things,

0:03:18 > 0:03:22if you like, of the world, would satisfy and they didn't.

0:03:26 > 0:03:30Having come back up to these parts now,

0:03:30 > 0:03:35to the Scottish Highlands and the islands,

0:03:35 > 0:03:39I'm kind of reconnected, if you like, with my childhood.

0:03:39 > 0:03:41I've almost come full circle.

0:03:41 > 0:03:45I embraced the religion that I grew up with.

0:03:45 > 0:03:47I never was a city boy.

0:03:47 > 0:03:50I was an island boy, and that's still in me.

0:03:52 > 0:03:56I'm much more at home where I am now.

0:04:01 > 0:04:05In 1968, Grampian TV travelled to Australia,

0:04:05 > 0:04:07another island full of Scots,

0:04:07 > 0:04:10to find out what was happening with a new generation

0:04:10 > 0:04:13who'd given up the cold comforts of old traditions

0:04:13 > 0:04:14for a fresh start in the sun.

0:04:14 > 0:04:19Australia had just introduced the Bring A Briton scheme.

0:04:19 > 0:04:23And tens of thousands of hopeful migrants headed Down Under,

0:04:23 > 0:04:26every year leaving family and loved ones behind.

0:04:26 > 0:04:28However, very soon they discovered

0:04:28 > 0:04:30that it was literally a world upside down.

0:04:33 > 0:04:37Every morning, migrants from the United Kingdom

0:04:37 > 0:04:39are arriving at Sydney airport,

0:04:39 > 0:04:41and most of them arrive in a bewildered state.

0:04:41 > 0:04:45Tom got a job up in Sydney, so we moved up here.

0:04:45 > 0:04:47When I saw the hostel here,

0:04:47 > 0:04:51I was really shocked, to put it mildly,

0:04:51 > 0:04:54because it was like a prison camp.

0:04:54 > 0:04:59The huts were dilapidated, really. They were really terrible.

0:05:04 > 0:05:07After only three months in Australia,

0:05:07 > 0:05:10it seemed the Scots in Will You No Come Back Again?

0:05:10 > 0:05:12wanted only one thing. To come back again.

0:05:12 > 0:05:14They were no doubt pining for the Highland rain

0:05:14 > 0:05:16and luxuries of the Scottish cludgie.

0:05:18 > 0:05:22My first impressions of it were really terrible.

0:05:22 > 0:05:26So many people that live in the hostel are just not very clean.

0:05:26 > 0:05:29Their appearance more than anybody.

0:05:29 > 0:05:31The British migrants seem to be better.

0:05:31 > 0:05:34It's just as well we can't time travel.

0:05:34 > 0:05:37Will You No Come Back? showed how disgruntled Scots can get

0:05:37 > 0:05:38when they're cut off from their roots,

0:05:38 > 0:05:41struggling to make a new life in an alien land.

0:05:41 > 0:05:43On the flipside, in this next documentary from 1980,

0:05:43 > 0:05:47you'll see some aliens who are only too happy

0:05:47 > 0:05:50to have a wee trace of tartan in their veins. Aye!

0:05:55 > 0:05:57This is Jim Lawrence reminding you that Scottish clans

0:05:57 > 0:06:01from throughout the United States will come to Norfolk April 2nd-11th

0:06:01 > 0:06:04to dance their flings, blow their bagpipes and sport their kilts

0:06:04 > 0:06:08in celebration of the first International Scottish Festival.

0:06:10 > 0:06:12In the midst of all this celebration,

0:06:12 > 0:06:15the big question is what does being a Scot mean to you?

0:06:17 > 0:06:20Scotland means Highlanders in general.

0:06:20 > 0:06:22And I know it's not necessarily that way,

0:06:22 > 0:06:25but that's what it means to me, the old-time Highlanders...

0:06:27 > 0:06:28A lot of fighting type stuff.

0:06:28 > 0:06:30Who do these guys think they are, eh?

0:06:30 > 0:06:34They're not real Scots like us, the big, stupid dafties.

0:06:36 > 0:06:42Could I ask you to put in words what your Highland heritage means to you?

0:06:43 > 0:06:45That's who I am.

0:06:45 > 0:06:47It's... I'm...

0:06:47 > 0:06:50I have a North Carolina accent but I'm a Scot.

0:06:50 > 0:06:52The American Scots in this documentary

0:06:52 > 0:06:54had their hearts in the right place,

0:06:54 > 0:06:56but their idea of a Scottish celebration

0:06:56 > 0:06:58was lacking in Highland passion.

0:06:58 > 0:07:01An American celebration without hamburgers and hotdogs

0:07:01 > 0:07:04is as inconceivable as a ceilidh without a wee dram.

0:07:04 > 0:07:08Even if here it has to be a dram of ice cold Coca-Cola.

0:07:13 > 0:07:17These people are clearly from the MacDonald clan.

0:07:17 > 0:07:20Then again, who's to say the Americans have got it wrong?

0:07:20 > 0:07:23And who's to say that one idea of Scottishness

0:07:23 > 0:07:25is better or worse than any other?

0:07:25 > 0:07:28Take for example the Scotland of the '70s.

0:07:28 > 0:07:30Now this is what I call true Scottish beauty.

0:07:33 > 0:07:36# I never know you looked so good

0:07:36 > 0:07:39# I never knew anyone could

0:07:39 > 0:07:42# I must have been crazy

0:07:42 > 0:07:45# To ever have gone away... #

0:07:45 > 0:07:47...Miss Dundee. Elaine, Miss Arbroath, Yvonne,

0:07:47 > 0:07:50Miss Kilmarnock. Jackie, Miss Glasgow South. Elizabeth Joy,

0:07:50 > 0:07:54Miss Paisley. Christine, Miss Johnston.

0:07:54 > 0:07:56And Jackie, Miss Aberdeen.

0:07:56 > 0:07:58# It's a miracle, a miracle

0:07:58 > 0:08:00# A true blue spectacle... #

0:08:00 > 0:08:03It was a miracle indeed!

0:08:03 > 0:08:05But sadly, the BBC decided for some reason

0:08:05 > 0:08:09that this should be the very last televised Miss Scotland competition.

0:08:09 > 0:08:10So can we glean anything

0:08:10 > 0:08:14about the true nature of Scottish beauty from the finalists?

0:08:15 > 0:08:18Well, as soon as I get my grant I'd like to start on my PhD,

0:08:18 > 0:08:21which is all about the domestication of the cat.

0:08:21 > 0:08:23I've actually got a cat cemetery in Egypt

0:08:23 > 0:08:26which I'm going to start digging, hopefully quite soon.

0:08:26 > 0:08:29# A miracle, it is a miracle... #

0:08:29 > 0:08:33I wonder what happened to Dorothy Walker.

0:08:33 > 0:08:36Being a well-known face and in the public eye,

0:08:36 > 0:08:40people often used to ring up when they wanted a quote about something.

0:08:40 > 0:08:43Where are you going on holiday? What's your favourite food?

0:08:43 > 0:08:47What do you think about independence for Scotland, that sort of thing.

0:08:49 > 0:08:51The things I was asked to do

0:08:51 > 0:08:54ranged from opening a furniture store in Glasgow,

0:08:54 > 0:08:58to taking a penguin out to dinner in the West End of Edinburgh.

0:08:58 > 0:09:01And also, of course, I met my husband when I was on television,

0:09:01 > 0:09:03he saw me on TV, and that wouldn't have happened

0:09:03 > 0:09:09so that was the major benefit of Miss Scotland 1979.

0:09:09 > 0:09:13Second, it's Miss Montrose, Dorothy Walker.

0:09:13 > 0:09:16After a modelling career that won her 20 other titles,

0:09:16 > 0:09:20Dorothy gave up the temptations of world travel and stardom

0:09:20 > 0:09:22to return to her home town of Montrose

0:09:22 > 0:09:25and restore a ruined Scottish castle to its former glory.

0:09:25 > 0:09:26It's now her home.

0:09:28 > 0:09:31If there'd been a Mr Scotland competition

0:09:31 > 0:09:34and it was judged on personality alone,

0:09:34 > 0:09:37then our next chap would have been a dead cert winner.

0:09:37 > 0:09:39Instead, he had to console himself

0:09:39 > 0:09:42with the TV Personality Of The Year award for 1976.

0:09:42 > 0:09:45Tom Weir's generous character and huge curiosity

0:09:45 > 0:09:49roamed all over Scotland in search of a very different kind of beauty.

0:09:58 > 0:10:02Well, I thought the brilliant sunshine was too good to last.

0:10:02 > 0:10:05The sun would have roasted you yesterday

0:10:05 > 0:10:08and today I've moved into winter into Glenn Affric.

0:10:08 > 0:10:12I must say that it's really a marvellous scene. A fairyland.

0:10:12 > 0:10:16All the birch trees here, almost like Christmas trees.

0:10:16 > 0:10:18Great bluffs with icicles hanging.

0:10:18 > 0:10:21Below me, the river with great lumps of ice.

0:10:21 > 0:10:26A few pine trees, this is just the very edge of the big forest.

0:10:26 > 0:10:29The primeval forest of Scotland.

0:10:30 > 0:10:33Tom Weir's epic trek was not for the faint hearted.

0:10:33 > 0:10:36He was a world-class mountaineer who scaled the Himalayas.

0:10:36 > 0:10:39But it was his infectious enthusiasm for the Scottish countryside

0:10:39 > 0:10:42that made this such a memorable series.

0:10:43 > 0:10:47Bizarrely, Weir's Way wasn't just for the Barbour jacket

0:10:47 > 0:10:48and wellies brigade.

0:10:48 > 0:10:51When STV repeated the show in the midnight to 3am slot

0:10:51 > 0:10:53in the late 1990s and early 2000s,

0:10:53 > 0:10:56it unexpectedly won over 30% of the TV audience

0:10:56 > 0:11:00and gained a cult following among late-night revellers and students.

0:11:00 > 0:11:02Wicked!

0:11:02 > 0:11:05What brought such different audiences to Weir's Way

0:11:05 > 0:11:08is probably the spontaneous, lyrical way

0:11:08 > 0:11:11that Weir reacted to what he saw around himself.

0:11:11 > 0:11:12OK.

0:11:12 > 0:11:15And the strange but true tales that Tom recounts for us,

0:11:15 > 0:11:19keeping the old Scottish tradition of storytelling alive.

0:11:19 > 0:11:22This is a wishing tree. Look at all the coins that are in it.

0:11:22 > 0:11:27They used to come to a holy well, which is now filled in, I believe.

0:11:27 > 0:11:31They would wish a wish and go away contented.

0:11:31 > 0:11:34But very much earlier than that, when Thomas Pennant paid a visit

0:11:34 > 0:11:38somewhere around the beginning of the 19th century,

0:11:38 > 0:11:42what he found was that the island was still being visited

0:11:42 > 0:11:46to cure mental illness, and the cure was pretty drastic.

0:11:46 > 0:11:49They went to the holy well, took a sip of the waters,

0:11:49 > 0:11:54they left a present and then they were dipped in the loch three times.

0:11:54 > 0:11:57They did that every day until they were cured.

0:11:57 > 0:11:58It's reckoned some of them WERE cured.

0:12:04 > 0:12:09The Scottish landscape isn't always about discovering hidden gems.

0:12:09 > 0:12:13Sometimes it's about mud and muscle.

0:12:13 > 0:12:16Climbing for hours and hours in gale force winds,

0:12:16 > 0:12:18risking life and limb to get to the top.

0:12:18 > 0:12:20Before the Munro Show,

0:12:20 > 0:12:24hill climbing had been the occupation of old, bearded men,

0:12:24 > 0:12:28but Muriel Gray brought a pinch of punk to the peaks.

0:12:28 > 0:12:31This is it, the tiny little summit of Sgurr nan Gillean,

0:12:31 > 0:12:35a quite magnificent mountain at 3167 feet.

0:12:35 > 0:12:39A translation of that incidentally means "hill of the young men".

0:12:39 > 0:12:40Fat chance with this film crew.

0:12:40 > 0:12:42CREW GROANS

0:12:42 > 0:12:44Oh, yes. But the thing about it is,

0:12:44 > 0:12:47even though we've come up tourist route, in inverted commas,

0:12:47 > 0:12:50it's still very exposed and there's some tricky scrambling there

0:12:50 > 0:12:52so you should take enormous care.

0:12:52 > 0:12:54I wouldn't recommend it if you don't have a head for heights.

0:12:54 > 0:12:56But look at the superb views

0:12:56 > 0:12:58quite unmatched by anything I've been on recently.

0:12:58 > 0:13:01Across there is In Pin, remember we did that last series.

0:13:01 > 0:13:05Right along the Coolan Rigde, down to Sligachan, where we started.

0:13:05 > 0:13:07The Red Cones behind me and Bla Bheinn.

0:13:07 > 0:13:09Spectacular!

0:13:11 > 0:13:15I can't tell you how sick I am of people thinking that we just flew in.

0:13:15 > 0:13:19We actually climbed every mountain for real, sometimes twice,

0:13:19 > 0:13:22because we had to wait for a good weather day for the weather to match.

0:13:22 > 0:13:26Everybody in the crew had to carry something huge up the hill

0:13:26 > 0:13:29tripod, Betacam, all the heavy batteries.

0:13:29 > 0:13:31Then, here's the really awful bit,

0:13:31 > 0:13:35is we had to come back on another day with the helicopter

0:13:35 > 0:13:37to get the helicopter shots.

0:13:37 > 0:13:40So they dropped me on the bits where I'd done the pieces to camera

0:13:40 > 0:13:42when we'd climbed the mountain.

0:13:42 > 0:13:46And you would always get some smart arse climber going,

0:13:46 > 0:13:49"Aha, that's how you do it then!"

0:13:49 > 0:13:54No! It's not! We've climbed it twice already!

0:13:54 > 0:13:57It's supposed to be an easy scramble.

0:13:57 > 0:14:00Can you imagine how awful this would be if it was wet and slimy?!

0:14:00 > 0:14:05I'm frightened. The worst thing is you break your fingernails!

0:14:12 > 0:14:14Oh!

0:14:17 > 0:14:19Oh, come away from the edge, Muriel!

0:14:22 > 0:14:25It was a potentially lethal couple of series.

0:14:25 > 0:14:29Yes, I nearly killed the entire crew one time on the top of a mountain,

0:14:29 > 0:14:33because I wanted to wait until the sunset,

0:14:33 > 0:14:35because it was an amazing sunset.

0:14:35 > 0:14:38I thought, great, great. Just wait, there it goes.

0:14:38 > 0:14:40Fantastic, we've got the sun going down.

0:14:40 > 0:14:44Oh, we're at the top of a mountain and it's dark.

0:14:44 > 0:14:46We only had head torches!

0:14:46 > 0:14:48That was embarrassing.

0:14:48 > 0:14:52We just managed to get down off that and save our dignity

0:14:52 > 0:14:54and not call out mountain rescue.

0:14:54 > 0:14:57Even though we were being silly, none of us involved in that program

0:14:57 > 0:15:02could hide our absolute passion for what we were doing.

0:15:02 > 0:15:05How much we loved Scotland, how much we loved the mountains.

0:15:05 > 0:15:07I think that came through, so what's wrong with that?

0:15:17 > 0:15:20Ah, the great outdoors. Coupled with the threat

0:15:20 > 0:15:24of severe bodily harm, coupled with a live broadcast

0:15:24 > 0:15:28is a recipe for having the audience on the edge of their seat!

0:15:28 > 0:15:29- Excuse me.- Sorry, love.

0:15:36 > 0:15:40Nearly 50 years ago, a group of Britain's leading mountaineers

0:15:40 > 0:15:43and a TV crew of 100 people put their lives on the line

0:15:43 > 0:15:46in one of the most extraordinary television events in history.

0:15:46 > 0:15:48The Old Man of Hoy.

0:15:48 > 0:15:52450 feet of crumbling sandstone rock,

0:15:52 > 0:15:55rising out of the North Atlantic off the islands of Orkney.

0:15:57 > 0:16:01Tonight, six men are going to try to climb this pinnacle,

0:16:01 > 0:16:03the most awesome pinnacle in the British Isles.

0:16:03 > 0:16:06This is reality TV before it was even invented!

0:16:06 > 0:16:11The BBC had to use the army to transport 16 tons of equipment

0:16:11 > 0:16:14450 miles by boat and tank landing craft.

0:16:14 > 0:16:17But this was peanuts compared to what lay ahead.

0:16:17 > 0:16:22The Old Man of Hoy is a sea stack 450 feet tall.

0:16:22 > 0:16:24It had only been climbed once before.

0:16:24 > 0:16:28And now they were doing it for the camera, live.

0:16:28 > 0:16:31Let's see what we can... Where Chris Bonington is.

0:16:31 > 0:16:34He should be somewhere at the bottom of the final crack.

0:16:34 > 0:16:35Right, Chris.

0:16:35 > 0:16:40I can see you now bridging across. How are you getting on?

0:16:40 > 0:16:42I'm buried deep in this chimney.

0:16:42 > 0:16:48It's pretty awkward going because the rock is all damp

0:16:48 > 0:16:52and the kind of thin slime of wet sand,

0:16:52 > 0:16:55it's just like ball bearings.

0:16:55 > 0:16:59The holes are fairly good so far but it's getting narrower.

0:16:59 > 0:17:01I think it's going to get pretty hard.

0:17:02 > 0:17:06There's always a sense of anxiety

0:17:06 > 0:17:11immediately before you go onto one of these live climbs.

0:17:11 > 0:17:14I've now done three of them.

0:17:14 > 0:17:17Firstly, you don't want to fall off.

0:17:17 > 0:17:19But then you don't want to fall off anyway.

0:17:19 > 0:17:25So I was actually rather... Kind of enjoyed talking as I climbed.

0:17:25 > 0:17:30I'm kind of ringing eloquent as I climb up the thing.

0:17:30 > 0:17:32I'm an enthusiastic kind of person.

0:17:34 > 0:17:37- Erm...- What are you doing there with that thing?

0:17:37 > 0:17:39I'm just getting a runner on.

0:17:39 > 0:17:44This is a bong bong that was left by the last party.

0:17:44 > 0:17:48I get really involved in trying to describe for an audience

0:17:48 > 0:17:50what the climb was like.

0:17:50 > 0:17:53Sometimes I get absolutely carried away with it.

0:17:53 > 0:17:55This was just one such occasion.

0:17:55 > 0:17:58I was there talking about what wonderful climbing it was, etc.

0:17:58 > 0:18:01I'd stopped actually concentrating on the climbing.

0:18:01 > 0:18:04- Your right foot doesn't look as if it's on much.- It's...

0:18:06 > 0:18:09My left foot actually is the worst one, the right one isn't too bad.

0:18:09 > 0:18:15And I suddenly found myself in a completely wrong position.

0:18:15 > 0:18:19I was kind of all off-balance, I couldn't get the next hole

0:18:19 > 0:18:21and I really thought I was going to fall off.

0:18:21 > 0:18:25I've now got to reach right up here... To try to get one foot up.

0:18:25 > 0:18:30Can we go to Joe Brown, I'll shut Chris Bonington up.

0:18:31 > 0:18:32An audience of 15 million

0:18:32 > 0:18:35tuned in over the weekend to watch the ascent.

0:18:35 > 0:18:37That was nearly a third of the population at the time.

0:18:37 > 0:18:39Nail biting stuff!

0:18:39 > 0:18:41The presenter, Chris Brasher,

0:18:41 > 0:18:43always seemed to pick the worst possible moments

0:18:43 > 0:18:45to talk to the climbers.

0:18:45 > 0:18:48IN A POSH ACCENT: I say up there. Yes, you. What? How are you doing?

0:18:48 > 0:18:52You've got an overhang above your head, what do you do now?

0:18:52 > 0:18:56Somebody who wasn't quite so good would get into real trouble.

0:18:56 > 0:18:58He's coming out.

0:18:58 > 0:19:03My wretched crash hat is too big to fit into the chimney.

0:19:03 > 0:19:08We weren't as good as the climbers of today

0:19:08 > 0:19:11but I think we were perhaps more full of character.

0:19:11 > 0:19:15And I think all of that made it something very special.

0:19:16 > 0:19:20They've got a long way to go, but they've got all tomorrow.

0:19:20 > 0:19:24Tonight, they'll sleep on the Old Man,

0:19:24 > 0:19:26on any nook or crevice that they can find,

0:19:26 > 0:19:31and we'll be back to see where they are

0:19:31 > 0:19:34at 10.45pm.

0:19:36 > 0:19:38You know, some folks see Scotland

0:19:38 > 0:19:40as one big, massive adventure playground.

0:19:40 > 0:19:41But it's not just the cliffs

0:19:41 > 0:19:44and Munros that attract the thrill seekers.

0:19:44 > 0:19:46There's also the uninhabited islands, too.

0:19:46 > 0:19:48At least Robinson Crusoe had the good sense

0:19:48 > 0:19:50to maroon himself on a tropical island.

0:19:50 > 0:19:53For this survivor, there's not so much as a coconut!

0:19:55 > 0:19:57Ewan, you're supposed to hold onto the rope.

0:19:58 > 0:19:59Oh!

0:20:01 > 0:20:04In this series of reports, tele-journalist James Hogg

0:20:04 > 0:20:07was put to the test when stranded on a Scottish island for two weeks.

0:20:07 > 0:20:10But before he was left to fend for himself,

0:20:10 > 0:20:13he was given a chummy crash course in survival skills

0:20:13 > 0:20:15from a man in the military.

0:20:15 > 0:20:18Check out these guys going native.

0:20:18 > 0:20:21There it is. Home sweet home.

0:20:21 > 0:20:24Turf on top for water protection.

0:20:24 > 0:20:29Bracken for a bed. Reflect the fire, delightful fire, keep you dry.

0:20:29 > 0:20:31What happens if there's a thunderstorm in the night, Gerry?

0:20:31 > 0:20:34- Marvellous, it won't leak.- Won't it?

0:20:34 > 0:20:39I never discovered why I was chosen for this particular role.

0:20:39 > 0:20:41But the editor of Nationwide, as it was,

0:20:41 > 0:20:47took me out to an all-expenses-paid BBC lunch in a very nice restaurant.

0:20:47 > 0:20:51Told me I was marvellous, I was doing great work,

0:20:51 > 0:20:54he much admired the quality of my abilities.

0:20:54 > 0:21:00And poured wine down me and finished with brandy and then he said,

0:21:00 > 0:21:05"Would you go on an uninhabited Scottish island for a couple of weeks

0:21:05 > 0:21:08"on your own, and do a little bit of filming.

0:21:08 > 0:21:10"And we'll pop over and film you from time to time

0:21:10 > 0:21:11"and put it out there next evening?

0:21:11 > 0:21:16"It'll be a kind of cliff-hanger. Will he survive?"

0:21:16 > 0:21:21I said, "Oh, yes, I'll do that. I was feeling very mellow by this point."

0:21:21 > 0:21:24No problem. So I did it.

0:21:24 > 0:21:26To his credit, James did succeed

0:21:26 > 0:21:29in living off the natural resources of the island,

0:21:29 > 0:21:32eating rabbits and fish and even seaweed.

0:21:32 > 0:21:36So, if you want to learn how to survive in the hostile wilderness,

0:21:36 > 0:21:38pay attention.

0:21:38 > 0:21:41You're about to hear four words that might just save your life.

0:21:43 > 0:21:45Ah! The buns are burnt!

0:21:46 > 0:21:51It is said that anything that walks, crawls, swims and flies can be eaten.

0:21:51 > 0:21:57Oh, mangle, dangle, strangle and something else, wasn't it?

0:21:57 > 0:22:00All that's required is a little bit of knowledge,

0:22:00 > 0:22:03a lot of luck and a little bit of equipment.

0:22:03 > 0:22:07You've got to strangle after you've... Tangled.

0:22:07 > 0:22:11Because it's not necessarily dead.

0:22:11 > 0:22:14I didn't lay the snare the first day, I didn't have time.

0:22:14 > 0:22:15I laid the snares the second.

0:22:15 > 0:22:20Then to my utter amazement, I found I'd got one.

0:22:20 > 0:22:22I'd clobbered it on the back of the neck.

0:22:22 > 0:22:25After two weeks of killing to survive,

0:22:25 > 0:22:28it was the solitude that finally mangled James' mind.

0:22:28 > 0:22:32The other thing I keep doing is keep forgetting what day it is.

0:22:32 > 0:22:34What I'd like... I can't remember what you asked me there.

0:22:34 > 0:22:38My brain is going as well as my body, you see.

0:22:38 > 0:22:40Funnily enough, people think,

0:22:40 > 0:22:43oh, you must have been sitting around all day.

0:22:43 > 0:22:48I was not sitting around all day. It's a full-time business surviving.

0:22:48 > 0:22:51Everything took far longer than you think.

0:22:51 > 0:22:53And you don't have a lot of time for philosophising.

0:22:53 > 0:22:58I very much doubt if the caveman did much philosophising

0:22:58 > 0:23:00because he was too busy!

0:23:04 > 0:23:05Well, if you thought that was tough,

0:23:05 > 0:23:07you should have seen what the BBC were planning

0:23:07 > 0:23:09for their end of millennium special.

0:23:09 > 0:23:11Castaway was going to be reality TV

0:23:11 > 0:23:13on a scale that had never been seen before.

0:23:13 > 0:23:15It even beat Big Brother to the punch.

0:23:15 > 0:23:17The question on everybody's minds was,

0:23:17 > 0:23:19how long will this group of strangers

0:23:19 > 0:23:21be able to survive in the middle of nowhere,

0:23:21 > 0:23:25without any creature comforts, with only each other for company?

0:23:25 > 0:23:28Well, that was the question for the first couple of episodes anyway.

0:23:31 > 0:23:3436 intrepid castaways were flown to the Isle of Taransay

0:23:34 > 0:23:36to build a community from scratch.

0:23:38 > 0:23:41They were only permitted to each take 100 kilograms

0:23:41 > 0:23:42of possessions with them.

0:23:42 > 0:23:45Which left them all grappling with the question

0:23:45 > 0:23:47of what items were essential for survival.

0:23:47 > 0:23:51- And... You put it on. Just shake it. - Beautiful.

0:23:56 > 0:23:57Loads of toothpaste.

0:23:57 > 0:23:58Perfume.

0:23:58 > 0:24:00My feet don't smell too bad.

0:24:02 > 0:24:06A little bit of lace and a little bit of red.

0:24:06 > 0:24:08And this to go with that.

0:24:08 > 0:24:09That is the real emergency kit here.

0:24:09 > 0:24:14I'd like to take a moment to applaud that woman's notion of essentials.

0:24:17 > 0:24:19Very soon, however,

0:24:19 > 0:24:23the castaways had bigger things to grapple with than frilly underwear.

0:24:23 > 0:24:25Storm clouds were brewing.

0:24:25 > 0:24:29We've lost a large proportion of the felt off one of the pods.

0:24:29 > 0:24:30The pods are leaking.

0:24:30 > 0:24:34People are very cramped, people are tired and irritable.

0:24:34 > 0:24:37I think things were put against us for a particular reason,

0:24:37 > 0:24:39to see how people would struggle

0:24:39 > 0:24:42and how other people would cope and get on with it.

0:24:42 > 0:24:44Some people went one side of the fence, some went the other.

0:24:44 > 0:24:49Who's going to crack up first? Of the people I've seen here,

0:24:49 > 0:24:53I would say maybe to keep an eye on Mike.

0:24:53 > 0:24:56I think it's a grey seal, from what I know about them.

0:24:56 > 0:24:59The poor wee thing looks as though it had a bit of a rough existence,

0:24:59 > 0:25:01so I employed Colin's help this morning

0:25:01 > 0:25:03to come down and skin the wee beastie.

0:25:03 > 0:25:05I was squeamish about cutting it open

0:25:05 > 0:25:06but you get used to it.

0:25:06 > 0:25:08It's a new one for his book and a new one for mine.

0:25:08 > 0:25:11Around about July or August, I took two weeks out

0:25:11 > 0:25:13which I referred to as my summer holiday,

0:25:13 > 0:25:15and I went to live on the other side of the island.

0:25:15 > 0:25:17I'm on holiday!

0:25:17 > 0:25:21Most of the community, the ones I got on with, came over to visit me.

0:25:21 > 0:25:22It was a good place.

0:25:25 > 0:25:28Mike's desire to become Robinson Crusoe

0:25:28 > 0:25:30went down a bomb with the others in the new community.

0:25:30 > 0:25:33All the time I've been thinking, we are all here for each other,

0:25:33 > 0:25:35so what's the point?

0:25:35 > 0:25:38Why doesn't he go and find an island on his own and bye-bye Mike?

0:25:38 > 0:25:40I think we would have worked in a far more cohesive way

0:25:40 > 0:25:43once we got rid of the antagonistic people.

0:25:43 > 0:25:45Yeah. The problem for the castaways

0:25:45 > 0:25:48was identifying which antagonistic people to get rid of

0:25:48 > 0:25:49in the name of peace.

0:25:49 > 0:25:52We'll see. We'll BEEP see.

0:25:52 > 0:25:54It's all getting a bit nasty.

0:25:54 > 0:25:56If there wasn't women and children in this room,

0:25:56 > 0:25:57I'd throw this plate at you.

0:25:57 > 0:26:01Another man's bottom. Having sex with another man is dirty.

0:26:01 > 0:26:04It says that in the Bible.

0:26:04 > 0:26:06What's going on?

0:26:06 > 0:26:10I'm BEEP sick of these BEEP earthlings that got here.

0:26:10 > 0:26:14And we're sick of you, you fat, snoring BEEP!

0:26:14 > 0:26:17- Ray!- Ray!- No!

0:26:17 > 0:26:21Sit down! Sit down! Stop it, now!

0:26:22 > 0:26:25In March, Ray dramatically left the island

0:26:25 > 0:26:27and sold his story to a newspaper.

0:26:27 > 0:26:32It was almost working. I think it was cruel that it was only a year.

0:26:32 > 0:26:36Insurance man Mike went on to become an international explorer.

0:26:36 > 0:26:38While Castaway set the template

0:26:38 > 0:26:41for a whole generation of reality TV shows

0:26:41 > 0:26:45filmed in dangerous, inaccessible and exotic places.

0:26:46 > 0:26:48Usually with a lot more sun!

0:26:53 > 0:26:55So, there you are.

0:26:55 > 0:26:57The documentary makers who braved the rough terrains,

0:26:57 > 0:27:01the hostile natives of Scotland and the terrible weather.

0:27:01 > 0:27:03These guys are modern adventurers,

0:27:03 > 0:27:06bringing the thrill of this great land into our homes.

0:27:06 > 0:27:10And maybe, just maybe, it's persuaded one or two of you

0:27:10 > 0:27:11to get up, get out the front door

0:27:11 > 0:27:16and get the blood pumping aboot yourself.

0:27:16 > 0:27:18And I've saved the best for last.

0:27:20 > 0:27:21A Dram For All Seasons

0:27:21 > 0:27:25is a rose-tinted look at the Scottish whiskey industry in 1976.

0:27:25 > 0:27:28There's a cracking wee bit where the guy explains

0:27:28 > 0:27:31that whiskey can actually cure death for real.

0:27:31 > 0:27:34All you need is whiskey, a glass...

0:27:37 > 0:27:38And a hat.

0:27:38 > 0:27:41Oh, and by the way, please don't try this at home.

0:27:43 > 0:27:45Watch and wonder at '70s health advice

0:27:45 > 0:27:48just the spirit for keeping your heart in the Highlands.

0:27:48 > 0:27:49Or the way to an early grave!

0:27:51 > 0:27:56Pour one large glass of blended whiskey into a pint tumbler

0:27:56 > 0:27:59and stir with a silver spoon.

0:27:59 > 0:28:04Then add the same size of glass full of boiling water.

0:28:04 > 0:28:07Then some brown sugar.

0:28:07 > 0:28:11Then another glass of blended whiskey and another glass of hot water.

0:28:11 > 0:28:16And then fill to the top of the pint glass with slightly warmed,

0:28:16 > 0:28:19not boiled, malt whiskey.

0:28:21 > 0:28:26Place your hat at the foot of the bed and climb in between the sheets.

0:28:26 > 0:28:31If a body could just find out the exact, proper proportions

0:28:31 > 0:28:36and quantity that ought to be drunk every day and keep to that,

0:28:36 > 0:28:42I verily trowel that he might live for ever withoot dying,

0:28:42 > 0:28:45and that doctors and churchyards would go out of fashion.

0:28:47 > 0:28:52Drink till you can see two hats.

0:28:53 > 0:28:54Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd