0:00:03 > 0:00:06By the second half of the 20th century
0:00:06 > 0:00:10the word "consumption" already had positive connotations.
0:00:10 > 0:00:15It denoted economic growth, choice, happiness even.
0:00:15 > 0:00:19But it was also still also the name of a wasting disease,
0:00:19 > 0:00:23one in which the sufferer grows smaller and weaker
0:00:23 > 0:00:25and eventually fades away.
0:00:25 > 0:00:29In the '50s, '60s and even the early '70s,
0:00:29 > 0:00:33both definitions could be applied to the Cars of the People.
0:00:41 > 0:00:45This week, how the people's car lost a wheel and lost its way,
0:00:45 > 0:00:48comedic French cars that go like a bomb...
0:00:50 > 0:00:52..and how noodles saved the world.
0:00:52 > 0:00:53Nothing can stop noodles!
0:00:55 > 0:00:57MUSIC: "Go Johnny Go" by Chuck Berry
0:00:57 > 0:01:02America, the 1950s. Happy Days.
0:01:02 > 0:01:04The nation is rich,
0:01:04 > 0:01:07there's excess manufacturing capacity after the war,
0:01:07 > 0:01:10fuel is cheap, materials are plentiful,
0:01:10 > 0:01:12space is seemingly limitless.
0:01:15 > 0:01:19What does this mean for the car? Well, something like this -
0:01:19 > 0:01:21a wheeled automotive palace
0:01:21 > 0:01:24celebrating the jet age with bosses and fins.
0:01:27 > 0:01:31American cars of the 1950s oozed wealth and glamour,
0:01:31 > 0:01:33and this rubbed off on the driver.
0:01:34 > 0:01:36Who's the best pilot you ever saw?
0:01:38 > 0:01:41At the top of the pile - Cadillac.
0:01:41 > 0:01:43This 18-foot, 2.2-ton
0:01:43 > 0:01:48Eldorado Biarritz seems a bit unnecessary.
0:01:48 > 0:01:51But, despite its 5.6 litre engine,
0:01:51 > 0:01:54and enough heavy metal to headline Donington,
0:01:54 > 0:01:58this overblown jukebox on wheels had its fair share of supersized rivals.
0:02:00 > 0:02:02American excess?
0:02:02 > 0:02:04That'll do nicely.
0:02:06 > 0:02:09Now, I'm only guessing because I wasn't there, obviously,
0:02:09 > 0:02:12but I reckon that life in 1950s California,
0:02:12 > 0:02:14where this car came from,
0:02:14 > 0:02:18was probably better than life in 1950s Birmingham.
0:02:18 > 0:02:20But it's just a hunch.
0:02:20 > 0:02:22# I feel unhappy... #
0:02:22 > 0:02:26Birmingham then, as now, was utterly depressing.
0:02:27 > 0:02:30But it wasn't alone in its abject misery.
0:02:30 > 0:02:35Unlike America, everybody in post-war Europe was broke.
0:02:35 > 0:02:37With rationing still in force,
0:02:37 > 0:02:40people did what they could to get by.
0:02:40 > 0:02:43MAN: A colander, for example, needs a little embellishment
0:02:43 > 0:02:45but a dash of colour works wonders -
0:02:45 > 0:02:47even if it does leak in rainy weather.
0:02:47 > 0:02:51For smart vegetarians, a salad bowl, with servers, too, you'll notice.
0:02:51 > 0:02:54It wasn't just hats.
0:02:54 > 0:02:56Elegant, a funnel hat.
0:02:56 > 0:02:59It really wasn't. The motorist longed for
0:02:59 > 0:03:02the bejewelled decadence that the Americans had.
0:03:03 > 0:03:07But what they got was a bunch of midgets with funny accents.
0:03:07 > 0:03:08COMICAL HORN TOOTS
0:03:08 > 0:03:11Welcome to the exciting and occasionally baffling world
0:03:11 > 0:03:13of the European microcar.
0:03:13 > 0:03:15The idea was really very simple.
0:03:15 > 0:03:18They were cars but they were smaller and simpler,
0:03:18 > 0:03:21so they use less materials, they were easier to make,
0:03:21 > 0:03:25they have simple engines, usually single cylinder, often two stroke,
0:03:25 > 0:03:28they were cheaper to buy, they were usually easier to run.
0:03:30 > 0:03:33The microcar promised to revolutionize motoring
0:03:33 > 0:03:37for the masses. They didn't just aim to solve post-war hardship
0:03:37 > 0:03:41but also congestion in the crowded European cities and towns.
0:03:41 > 0:03:44And because they were pretty basic to make,
0:03:44 > 0:03:46all sorts of people had a go.
0:03:46 > 0:03:49This is a FMR Tg500.
0:03:49 > 0:03:52Better known as the Messerschmitt Tiger.
0:03:58 > 0:04:01Now, let me say straightaway it's a complete myth that Messerschmitt
0:04:01 > 0:04:05built these using leftover canopies from World War II aircraft.
0:04:05 > 0:04:08But you can see where they got the idea from.
0:04:08 > 0:04:11It looks like a 110 Zerstorer fighter bomber
0:04:11 > 0:04:13with the wings and the tail chopped off.
0:04:15 > 0:04:18Doesn't have a steering wheel, as such. It has a yoke,
0:04:18 > 0:04:21again a bit like, let me think... Yes, an aeroplane.
0:04:21 > 0:04:26The Messerschmitt came with a 500cc two-stroke twin cylinder engine,
0:04:26 > 0:04:29four gears, and a spare seat for your rear gunner.
0:04:29 > 0:04:32It was also small and very cheap.
0:04:34 > 0:04:38It's very ingenious, though, because it is, of course, German.
0:04:38 > 0:04:39German aeroplane designers
0:04:39 > 0:04:42weren't allowed to make aeroplanes after the war,
0:04:42 > 0:04:45so they applied their considerable talents to this sort of thing.
0:04:45 > 0:04:48In fact, if you get the sun in the right position you can bank
0:04:48 > 0:04:51some lesser European microcars and shoot them down
0:04:51 > 0:04:52before they even know you're there.
0:04:54 > 0:04:56Yes, the Tiger is a rich source
0:04:56 > 0:05:00of cheap and predictable Battle of Britain gags.
0:05:00 > 0:05:03But, compared to some other first-time designers,
0:05:03 > 0:05:06at least Messerschmitt knew if they were coming or going.
0:05:07 > 0:05:10This, for example, is the Zundapp Janus,
0:05:10 > 0:05:13named after the Roman god who could look in both directions
0:05:13 > 0:05:14at the same time.
0:05:14 > 0:05:17I presume they called it that because it's almost completely
0:05:17 > 0:05:22symmetrical front to rear, apart from the lights.
0:05:22 > 0:05:24And the big surprise for you is -
0:05:24 > 0:05:26I'm not driving.
0:05:26 > 0:05:28I am.
0:05:28 > 0:05:30MUSIC: "Back To Front" By The Kinks
0:05:30 > 0:05:32# East is west, left is right
0:05:32 > 0:05:34# Up is down and black is white... #
0:05:34 > 0:05:36Zundapp was a motorcycle maker
0:05:36 > 0:05:41and, not surprisingly, the Janus is powered by a 250cc bike engine.
0:05:41 > 0:05:45It's mounted exactly in the middle. Where else could it go?
0:05:45 > 0:05:48Do you know, this never caught on. I wonder why not?
0:05:48 > 0:05:50Maybe because it's confusing.
0:05:50 > 0:05:54Maybe that's why I left the indicator on all day.
0:05:54 > 0:05:56Advantages of a symmetrical car?
0:05:56 > 0:06:00Well, the doors and the glass are the same at both ends.
0:06:00 > 0:06:03And the seats are the same as well. That makes it cheaper to build.
0:06:06 > 0:06:09Disadvantages - it sort of interferes
0:06:09 > 0:06:11with your passenger's minds a bit.
0:06:11 > 0:06:13# All the small things... #
0:06:13 > 0:06:16While the experimental Zundapp
0:06:16 > 0:06:19might have caused its occupants temporary insanity,
0:06:19 > 0:06:23other models like BMW's iconic Isetta became the byword
0:06:23 > 0:06:26for reliable, low cost family motoring.
0:06:26 > 0:06:30But, despite their wildly differing designs, all the early microcars
0:06:30 > 0:06:33offered the cash-strapped European worker
0:06:33 > 0:06:35something that a normal car couldn't -
0:06:35 > 0:06:40you could drive these four wheel marvels on a motorcycle licence.
0:06:40 > 0:06:41Well, you could...
0:06:41 > 0:06:43unless you were British.
0:06:45 > 0:06:48Here's one from a very prolific British maker - Bond.
0:06:48 > 0:06:52Bond and this British Messerschmitt and this British Isetta
0:06:52 > 0:06:56have one important difference. They only have three wheels.
0:06:56 > 0:07:01Because a piece of legislation said you could drive one of these if it
0:07:01 > 0:07:05was below a certain weight and you only had a motorcycle licence,
0:07:05 > 0:07:07so long as it only had three wheels.
0:07:07 > 0:07:10This is very, very complicated and nobody on this programme
0:07:10 > 0:07:14really understands it properly but we are fairly confident
0:07:14 > 0:07:17that this bit of government interference...
0:07:17 > 0:07:19spoiled everything.
0:07:19 > 0:07:23The three wheel legislation aimed to draw a line between proper
0:07:23 > 0:07:26middle class motorists, and working class oiks and bikers
0:07:26 > 0:07:30who wouldn't or couldn't obtain a full driving licence.
0:07:30 > 0:07:34But all it actually achieved was to wreck the British microcar's chances
0:07:34 > 0:07:36right from the start.
0:07:36 > 0:07:39Many affordable three wheeled models were available over the years,
0:07:39 > 0:07:42but sales were poor for two main reasons -
0:07:42 > 0:07:46they made you look like a berk, and this tended to happen...
0:07:50 > 0:07:52Reliants uniformly gormless range
0:07:52 > 0:07:55symbolized all that was wrong with the British three wheeler.
0:07:55 > 0:07:58It was mocked to the point of ennui,
0:07:58 > 0:08:02and in 2005 was voted the Worst British Car in History.
0:08:04 > 0:08:07Across the Channel in la belle France, however,
0:08:07 > 0:08:10things were a lot more laissez faire.
0:08:10 > 0:08:13You could have four wheels if you wanted - no-one really cared.
0:08:13 > 0:08:16And it didn't matter what sort of licence you had.
0:08:16 > 0:08:18Boff! You didn't need a licence at all.
0:08:19 > 0:08:21There was but one small catch
0:08:21 > 0:08:25and it came in the shape of a chewed block of Duplo.
0:08:25 > 0:08:28This is a KV1.
0:08:28 > 0:08:31It's a so-called voiture sans permis,
0:08:31 > 0:08:33a car without permit.
0:08:35 > 0:08:37It's awful.
0:08:37 > 0:08:39Honestly.
0:08:44 > 0:08:49I'm not camping it up or anything. This is truly diabolical.
0:08:50 > 0:08:54This represents the most ruthless attempt yet
0:08:54 > 0:08:58to pare back both the car and the ownership burden.
0:09:03 > 0:09:05This isn't a particularly rough road, honestly.
0:09:07 > 0:09:10Voitures sans permis, or VSPs,
0:09:10 > 0:09:14were a truly egalitarian attempt at a people's cars.
0:09:14 > 0:09:17Small, simple and very "merde,"
0:09:17 > 0:09:20they would mobilise the very fringes of French society.
0:09:20 > 0:09:23There were some rules governing the car.
0:09:23 > 0:09:26It had to be below a certain weight.
0:09:26 > 0:09:29It was only allowed to have two seats and, for some reason, no boot.
0:09:31 > 0:09:33That was pretty much it.
0:09:33 > 0:09:36For your part you, just bought it and drove away.
0:09:37 > 0:09:39Even if you couldn't drive.
0:09:39 > 0:09:43Pre-1988, French urchins as young as 14
0:09:43 > 0:09:45were allowed to drive these things.
0:09:46 > 0:09:47Again, no test, nothing.
0:09:47 > 0:09:52You just got one, nicked one - there are no keys or anything -
0:09:52 > 0:09:54and you had a car.
0:09:56 > 0:09:59I use the term "car" quite generously, obviously.
0:10:03 > 0:10:06You'd think that the manufacturers of this abomination on wheels
0:10:06 > 0:10:09wouldn't have been able to give it away.
0:10:09 > 0:10:11But you'd be wrong.
0:10:11 > 0:10:17When this car went on sale in 1978, it cost around £700.
0:10:17 > 0:10:20Now, I was around in 1978
0:10:20 > 0:10:24and I seem to remember that £700 was a huge amount of money.
0:10:24 > 0:10:28But it's not just the build quality, price, performance,
0:10:28 > 0:10:32or the sheer insanity of the thing that lets the KV1 down.
0:10:32 > 0:10:36It is, quite honestly, pantaloon- fillingly-terrifying to drive.
0:10:36 > 0:10:39- Oh,- BLEEP,- I've pulled out! Oh, Christ!
0:10:40 > 0:10:44What a merciful man. Merci, monsieur.
0:10:44 > 0:10:46Oh, my God!
0:10:47 > 0:10:49Oh, God I'm joining like a proper...
0:10:49 > 0:10:51LORRY HORN HONKS
0:10:54 > 0:11:00There's a gigantic lorry behind me. It's massive.
0:11:03 > 0:11:05I'm going left, I'm going left.
0:11:22 > 0:11:24I don't know, call me a wimp if you like
0:11:24 > 0:11:27but I didn't really like having that behind me.
0:11:29 > 0:11:33In order to show just how lethal these microcars are,
0:11:33 > 0:11:37we must put one in the hands of a typical VSP driver.
0:11:37 > 0:11:41Blondine, who is perfectly sane and absolutely normal in every way,
0:11:41 > 0:11:45but she's only 15 and therefore has never driven a car,
0:11:45 > 0:11:50no car, not even a VSP. However, had she been 15 in the early '70s
0:11:50 > 0:11:53she could just climb in and drive away.
0:11:57 > 0:12:00We'll be marking Blondine down for each imaginary French pedestrian
0:12:00 > 0:12:05- she kills in this old Axiam. - Trois, deux, un. Partez!
0:12:06 > 0:12:07Brake, brake, brake!
0:12:13 > 0:12:15'There goes the first one as Blondine reverses into an imaginary
0:12:15 > 0:12:19'blameless baguette seller, orphaning a French family of 16.'
0:12:20 > 0:12:22Terrifying.
0:12:22 > 0:12:24'Remember, in the '70s this could be you in the
0:12:24 > 0:12:27'passenger seat next to somebody who doesn't know where the brake is.'
0:12:27 > 0:12:29Touch the brake...
0:12:30 > 0:12:35'That's a whole troupe of imaginary mime artists silenced for ever.'
0:12:35 > 0:12:37Keep going, keep going, keep going.
0:12:37 > 0:12:38'Small dog.'
0:12:38 > 0:12:40Good recovery.
0:12:43 > 0:12:45'Blondine's safari continues by ploughing through
0:12:45 > 0:12:47'a sizeable pavement cafe.'
0:12:51 > 0:12:53Stop. Stop, stop.
0:12:53 > 0:12:55Reverse, reverse.
0:12:55 > 0:12:59'It's a massive overshoot as the Axiam enters the local bibliotheque
0:12:59 > 0:13:00'through the window.'
0:13:00 > 0:13:03You have to go...parallel.
0:13:06 > 0:13:10'And one more point for murdering the idea of parallel parking.'
0:13:10 > 0:13:12Tres bon.
0:13:12 > 0:13:14'The final score is ten confirmed kills
0:13:14 > 0:13:16'in just under a third of a mile.'
0:13:16 > 0:13:19And if you think that's over the top, consider this -
0:13:19 > 0:13:22it wasn't just underage French people,
0:13:22 > 0:13:24but drivers banned for being dangerous or drunk
0:13:24 > 0:13:28who could all legally get behind the wheel of a VSP.
0:13:28 > 0:13:31At the height of the unlicensed VSP disaster,
0:13:31 > 0:13:35there were around 50 deaths on French roads every single day.
0:13:37 > 0:13:42VSPs are horrible. I don't want anything else to do with them.
0:13:42 > 0:13:45I'm sure you're bored of watching them as well.
0:13:45 > 0:13:48I'll tell you what, why don't we go back to that road
0:13:48 > 0:13:51at the beginning of this French sequence and I'll come over the hill
0:13:51 > 0:13:54in something a bit more interesting.
0:13:54 > 0:13:56And better.
0:13:56 > 0:13:59MUSIC: "La Marseillaise"
0:14:04 > 0:14:06Yeah, all right, it's a cliche,
0:14:06 > 0:14:10but, like all cliches, it's a cliche because it's good.
0:14:14 > 0:14:16This is just tremendous, this thing.
0:14:16 > 0:14:20While the VSP took everything bad about motoring and made it worse,
0:14:20 > 0:14:23the Citroen 2CV can claim to be
0:14:23 > 0:14:25one of France's greatest ever achievements.
0:14:27 > 0:14:29What could be more French than this?
0:14:29 > 0:14:33I mean, it's utterly ridiculous, and yet it's charming,
0:14:33 > 0:14:36and strangely adorable.
0:14:39 > 0:14:41Right, first of all, let's clear up something you're all a bit
0:14:41 > 0:14:45too embarrassed to ask. Why is it called the 2CV?
0:14:45 > 0:14:48Well, it actually means "deux cheveaux vapeur,"
0:14:48 > 0:14:51which is "two steam horses."
0:14:51 > 0:14:55It's the nominal output of the original 375cc engine,
0:14:55 > 0:14:58measured in the way that you would measure the output
0:14:58 > 0:15:00of a steam engine. Anyway, don't worry,
0:15:00 > 0:15:03this is a later 425CC car
0:15:03 > 0:15:06and this develops a heady nine horse power.
0:15:12 > 0:15:15For most of us in Britain, the 2CV is bound up with tie and dye
0:15:15 > 0:15:19in that '70s and early '80s period. You know, when people where
0:15:19 > 0:15:23starting to experiment with brown foodstuffs and barn conversions.
0:15:23 > 0:15:29That sort of thing. In actual fact, the 2CV is a pre-war design.
0:15:29 > 0:15:32It comes from that era when any nation worth its salt
0:15:32 > 0:15:36was head-butting the complex idea of a car for the masses.
0:15:36 > 0:15:41In 1938, Citroen unveiled the 2CV's earliest prototype.
0:15:41 > 0:15:45Codenamed the TPV, or the tres petite voiture,
0:15:45 > 0:15:48the car came with Citroen's revolutionary soft suspension
0:15:48 > 0:15:50that put the fun into road rage.
0:15:52 > 0:15:53So far so good.
0:15:53 > 0:15:59But in 1940, just as production began, Hitler swept into France.
0:16:01 > 0:16:05The Citroen factory appeared to carry on as normal, but in secret
0:16:05 > 0:16:08all traces of the little car were hidden from the invader.
0:16:11 > 0:16:15And post-war, enough 2CVs were recovered from their hidey holes
0:16:15 > 0:16:19to launch the car at the 1948 Paris Motor Show.
0:16:19 > 0:16:22And, so, the 2CV began its long and enduring love affair
0:16:22 > 0:16:25with the French people. And to this day,
0:16:25 > 0:16:28like Japanese soldiers still fighting World War II,
0:16:28 > 0:16:31prototypes are still being found,
0:16:31 > 0:16:34hiding from the enemy in barns all over France.
0:16:35 > 0:16:39So, the 2CV is a contemporary of the Beetle
0:16:39 > 0:16:42and they share a similar philosophy.
0:16:42 > 0:16:46They're both full size four-seater cars. They're both very simply made
0:16:46 > 0:16:50so they're easy to maintain. You could take that apart with
0:16:50 > 0:16:51a handful of tools.
0:16:51 > 0:16:54The engine is air-cooled but now it only has two cylinders,
0:16:54 > 0:16:58and it's mounted at the front, and it drives the front wheels.
0:16:58 > 0:17:00Apparently, it can be driven at full revs
0:17:00 > 0:17:03all day long without exploding.
0:17:03 > 0:17:06Where they differ, though, is in the vision of their creators.
0:17:06 > 0:17:10The German car was for high speed efficiency
0:17:10 > 0:17:12on revolutionary autobahn.
0:17:12 > 0:17:15The French car was designed to be driven across a ploughed field
0:17:15 > 0:17:19by peasants carrying a basket of eggs, and without breaking any.
0:17:20 > 0:17:22Eggs or peasants.
0:17:22 > 0:17:26If ever a car suited its people, it was the 2CV.
0:17:26 > 0:17:28It cost less than half the price of a VW Beetle,
0:17:28 > 0:17:31yet was infinitely more practical.
0:17:31 > 0:17:36Actually, the 2CV is a handy denoter of Frenchness.
0:17:36 > 0:17:40If you're making a film, a TV series, illustrating a comic strip,
0:17:40 > 0:17:42you simply plop a 2CV in and that says,
0:17:42 > 0:17:45"This person, this scene, is very French."
0:17:45 > 0:17:47It's utterly unequivocal,
0:17:47 > 0:17:51like a Breton shirt or a sting of onions hanging from a bicycle.
0:17:51 > 0:17:53Or a beret.
0:17:53 > 0:17:56You'd think that thanks to its brave war record,
0:17:56 > 0:17:58and its strong national identity,
0:17:58 > 0:18:03the 2CV would easily be France's most celebrated people's car.
0:18:04 > 0:18:10However, the French know that this is all complete nonsense.
0:18:10 > 0:18:14Their real automotive hero, the one that Delacroix would have painted
0:18:14 > 0:18:16standing atop a pile of vanquished bodies,
0:18:16 > 0:18:19waving the tricolor, is in here.
0:18:24 > 0:18:28And that, if you didn't know, is a Renault 4.
0:18:35 > 0:18:39The Renault 4 is the most successful French car of all time.
0:18:42 > 0:18:46It may be the most successful French thing of all time
0:18:46 > 0:18:49after the croque-monsieur.
0:18:49 > 0:18:51Which is really just a cheese and ham toastie,
0:18:51 > 0:18:54and they stole that from us. At Agincourt.
0:19:00 > 0:19:05While the 2CV acted as a sort of missionary, spreading the gospel
0:19:05 > 0:19:09of French chicness and eccentricity around the globe,
0:19:09 > 0:19:12the Renault 4 soldiered on with the more onerous task
0:19:12 > 0:19:15of being France's true people's car.
0:19:16 > 0:19:18Under four million 2CVs were built
0:19:18 > 0:19:23but over nine and a half million Renault 4s, and not just in France.
0:19:23 > 0:19:28It was built in other parts of the world. It sold in 125 countries.
0:19:28 > 0:19:33Its mission was quite simply to make the motoring world French.
0:19:35 > 0:19:38Those impressive figures may be partly down to an innovation
0:19:38 > 0:19:42that puts the Renault 4 firmly above the 2CV.
0:19:42 > 0:19:46It's a masterstroke that changed car designs for ever.
0:19:46 > 0:19:50Renault's ideas for a voiture des peuples, or people's car,
0:19:50 > 0:19:52were formulated in the late 1940s
0:19:52 > 0:19:54and originally they thought it would be an enlarged,
0:19:54 > 0:19:58more powerful version of their 4CV saloon -
0:19:58 > 0:20:00no relationship to the Citroen whatsoever.
0:20:00 > 0:20:02But that would have made it rear engine,
0:20:02 > 0:20:05so they scrapped that and put the engine in the front -
0:20:05 > 0:20:08which makes this the first ever front-wheel drive Renault.
0:20:08 > 0:20:12And then they realised, because there was no engine in the back,
0:20:12 > 0:20:15they could make the rear seats fold down.
0:20:15 > 0:20:17And then...
0:20:18 > 0:20:21..they invented le hatchback.
0:20:21 > 0:20:28Now we can have produits dans la voiture very easily.
0:20:28 > 0:20:31That and so much more besides.
0:20:32 > 0:20:34But it wasn't all boring baguettes in the boot.
0:20:34 > 0:20:37Unlike the homely 2CV, the Renault 4 was marketed
0:20:37 > 0:20:40as a macho four-wheeled version of Ross Kemp,
0:20:40 > 0:20:42ready for slightly camp adventure
0:20:42 > 0:20:45in exotic locations all across the world.
0:20:45 > 0:20:48And this gung ho attitude was backed up under the bonnet.
0:20:48 > 0:20:52The engine 747cc
0:20:52 > 0:20:56and four cylinders, and liquid cooled.
0:20:56 > 0:20:59That's bigger than any 2CV engine ever was.
0:20:59 > 0:21:00And you can tell.
0:21:00 > 0:21:03ENGINE ROARS
0:21:03 > 0:21:04That's second of the three gears.
0:21:06 > 0:21:08Look at that, I'm doing 40.
0:21:08 > 0:21:13It may be basic, it might have a baffling gear change, it's slow,
0:21:13 > 0:21:17but the Renault 4 allows us to roll about in more lovely cliches.
0:21:17 > 0:21:20It's got Gallic charm in spades.
0:21:20 > 0:21:22Drive one for long enough
0:21:22 > 0:21:24and you'll occasionally lapse into Frenchness.
0:21:26 > 0:21:28Bonjour, mademoiselle.
0:21:30 > 0:21:32Crikey, what a ripping girl.
0:21:32 > 0:21:35So that would appear to be a cut and dried victory
0:21:35 > 0:21:38for the Renault 4 over its rival.
0:21:38 > 0:21:41But Citroen wasn't about to give up without a fight.
0:21:41 > 0:21:44The Renault 4 and the 2CV were
0:21:44 > 0:21:46mechanically simple, very robust cars.
0:21:46 > 0:21:50So they were infinitely adaptable. Yes, they were the standard cars
0:21:50 > 0:21:53but then there were pick-up versions, covered pick-up versions,
0:21:53 > 0:21:56small camper vans, bakers' vans.
0:21:56 > 0:21:58They were used by the fire service,
0:21:58 > 0:21:59they were used by the police.
0:21:59 > 0:22:01They even made, in the case of the Renault 4,
0:22:01 > 0:22:05a sort of beach version. Infinite variety.
0:22:05 > 0:22:08But this sort of thing can go too far.
0:22:08 > 0:22:10And it did.
0:22:10 > 0:22:13In a vain quest to sort it out once and for all,
0:22:13 > 0:22:16Renault and Citroen both produced military versions.
0:22:16 > 0:22:20And while the Renault 4 Sinpar served with the
0:22:20 > 0:22:22French military in Africa,
0:22:22 > 0:22:26the 2CV pick-up found itself with the British Royal Marines
0:22:26 > 0:22:28in the Far East as a helicopter-bourne
0:22:28 > 0:22:29light assault vehicle.
0:22:29 > 0:22:32What on Earth were the French thinking of?
0:22:32 > 0:22:34Cardboard cars with comedy gear changes
0:22:34 > 0:22:35as assault vehicles?
0:22:35 > 0:22:37Sacre bleu!
0:22:37 > 0:22:39But let's give them the benefit of the doubt,
0:22:39 > 0:22:43with a wholly gratuitous and typically scientific Top Gear test.
0:22:43 > 0:22:46Now, these two examples, the 2CV and the Renault 4,
0:22:46 > 0:22:48have been converted to military use
0:22:48 > 0:22:51in much the same way the originals would have been.
0:22:51 > 0:22:53They have been painted dark green.
0:22:53 > 0:22:56But which was best on the field of battle?
0:22:57 > 0:22:59Let's find out.
0:23:01 > 0:23:03We've set our quarry up in this French quarry.
0:23:03 > 0:23:07Our two sturdy light grade passenger vehicles will advance
0:23:07 > 0:23:10very slowly along the ground to simulate the terror of the soldiers
0:23:10 > 0:23:11who were forced to drive them.
0:23:13 > 0:23:15Meanwhile, up in our bunker, we have the sort of weaponry these
0:23:15 > 0:23:19cars would have faced during their post-colonial adventures.
0:23:19 > 0:23:22This is a good old British rifle, the Lee-Enfield,
0:23:22 > 0:23:26and this is what it fires, the .303 British cartridge.
0:23:26 > 0:23:29These were used in pretty much everything, really -
0:23:29 > 0:23:32Lee-Metford and Lee-Enfield rifles, Bren guns,
0:23:32 > 0:23:34Browning machine guns in Spitfires and Hurricanes,
0:23:34 > 0:23:38and the gun turrets of Lancaster bombers, and so on, and so on.
0:23:38 > 0:23:41Thousands of millions of these have been made and fired at everything
0:23:41 > 0:23:46from paper targets and beer bottles, to big game and foreigners.
0:23:46 > 0:23:49We're not sure, though, that any have ever been fired at French cars,
0:23:49 > 0:23:50so let's give it a go.
0:23:51 > 0:23:53All clear!
0:24:01 > 0:24:032CV.
0:24:03 > 0:24:04Window.
0:24:06 > 0:24:08Window.
0:24:11 > 0:24:12Empty.
0:24:14 > 0:24:17So far, it's a typically French military performance.
0:24:17 > 0:24:20Neither car seems to be putting up much of a fight
0:24:20 > 0:24:22against the .303 round.
0:24:22 > 0:24:26But both cars are still drivable, so let's take this up a notch.
0:24:26 > 0:24:28Can I do some more shooting?
0:24:28 > 0:24:31# This town ain't big enough for the both of us. #
0:24:32 > 0:24:34I don't think that was quite scientific enough,
0:24:34 > 0:24:38so let's move on to a more contemporary weapon - the AK-47.
0:24:38 > 0:24:40This is the very cheap Chinese-made one.
0:24:40 > 0:24:42Now, I'm not allowed to use this,
0:24:42 > 0:24:45because it's a Section 5 firearm. It's fully automatic.
0:24:45 > 0:24:49So it will be fired today by my glamorous assistant, Joss.
0:24:49 > 0:24:51- Sir.- Thank you.
0:24:51 > 0:24:53# Heartbeat, increasing heartbeat
0:24:53 > 0:24:55# You are a khaki-coloured bombardier
0:24:55 > 0:24:58# It's Hiroshima that you're nearing
0:24:58 > 0:25:00# This town ain't big enough for both of us... #
0:25:02 > 0:25:04GUNSHOTS, GLASS BREAKS
0:25:04 > 0:25:06GUNSHOTS
0:25:17 > 0:25:21In normal life, Joss does crosswords and likes small animals.
0:25:23 > 0:25:25Our two French vehicles are certainly starting
0:25:25 > 0:25:27to look more Swiss.
0:25:27 > 0:25:30But I can't in good scientific conscience say that either of them
0:25:30 > 0:25:32is out for the count just yet.
0:25:32 > 0:25:34Time to bring in the big gun.
0:25:34 > 0:25:38Now, I would normally baulk at an act of unbridled vandalism
0:25:38 > 0:25:40to cars, such as you are about to witness,
0:25:40 > 0:25:41but let's be honest -
0:25:41 > 0:25:46in this instance, they were literally asking for it.
0:25:50 > 0:25:51Ready, sir.
0:25:53 > 0:25:56As another great military strategist said,
0:25:56 > 0:25:58"Now I have a machine gun.
0:25:58 > 0:26:00"Ho-ho-ho."
0:26:04 > 0:26:06OK, here we go.
0:26:07 > 0:26:09LIVELY GUNFIRE
0:26:09 > 0:26:12MUSIC: "Symphony No. 9 in D minor" by Ludwig van Beethoven
0:26:36 > 0:26:38SILENCE
0:26:38 > 0:26:41Quite a lot of stuff hit me in the face then.
0:26:43 > 0:26:47And, so, the great Renault 4 2CV rivalry shoot out
0:26:47 > 0:26:49reaches its conclusion.
0:26:49 > 0:26:52Our imaginary infantrymen, those unhappy few,
0:26:52 > 0:26:55those band of buggered who drove the 2CV or Renault 4
0:26:55 > 0:26:58into the heart of occupied territory
0:26:58 > 0:26:59have been comprehensively...
0:26:59 > 0:27:02Oh, sod it. Let's have a tie-break.
0:27:18 > 0:27:20We may be finally be seeing
0:27:20 > 0:27:23the Renault 4's defence capabilities.
0:27:23 > 0:27:24Or we may be rotten shots.
0:27:40 > 0:27:43One of them missed the camera by about a quarter of an inch.
0:27:44 > 0:27:46'Actually, no, it didn't.'
0:27:48 > 0:27:49BLEEP.
0:27:49 > 0:27:52'But just when we thought we'd got this all wrong
0:27:52 > 0:27:54'and the Renault did come with force fields...'
0:27:58 > 0:28:01MUSIC: "No Regrets" by Edith Piaf
0:28:07 > 0:28:09He may not make it back to base.
0:28:27 > 0:28:29The vehicle has been defeated.
0:28:31 > 0:28:35And, as the smoke cleared, we were left with an impossible decision.
0:28:35 > 0:28:38We could only come to one reasonable conclusion.
0:28:38 > 0:28:43Both cars were utterly, ludicrously inept as military service vehicles.
0:28:45 > 0:28:47But then the 2CV caught fire so we gave it to the Renault.
0:28:59 > 0:29:01So, what have we learned?
0:29:01 > 0:29:05You can go to market in them, you can go out for a picnic in them,
0:29:05 > 0:29:06you can go the shops in them,
0:29:06 > 0:29:08and you can go on a romantic date in them,
0:29:08 > 0:29:13but don't, for God's sake, go to war in the Citroen 2CV or the Renault 4
0:29:13 > 0:29:15because they're rubbish.
0:29:16 > 0:29:18I hope that was useful.
0:29:33 > 0:29:35OK, they're not military vehicles
0:29:35 > 0:29:37but let's not hold that against them.
0:29:37 > 0:29:39These are truly iconic cars
0:29:39 > 0:29:42that are deeply engrained in our motoring consciousness
0:29:42 > 0:29:45and I can demonstrate that to you, because if you go outside -
0:29:45 > 0:29:48I don't know what sort of mid-sized mainstream car you may have -
0:29:48 > 0:29:52but if you just took one bit off it you wouldn't be able to identify it
0:29:52 > 0:29:54from that, and yet if I hold up this rear wing
0:29:54 > 0:29:56from one of our blown up cars
0:29:56 > 0:30:00and you ignore the bullet holes and the fact it already says 2CV on it,
0:30:00 > 0:30:04you would still identify that as the rear wing of a car that once
0:30:04 > 0:30:08took a lovesick young poet to the Rive Gauche,
0:30:08 > 0:30:12or a pastis-soaked protester to a fishing port in Calais.
0:30:12 > 0:30:15That's how iconic they are.
0:30:15 > 0:30:18And now for something British,
0:30:18 > 0:30:20and so pathetic,
0:30:20 > 0:30:22it's not even worthy of target practice.
0:30:23 > 0:30:26Faced with the growing evidence that microcars were not much good
0:30:26 > 0:30:28at dealing with congestion,
0:30:28 > 0:30:30the British looked for inspiration
0:30:30 > 0:30:32to a place which had no congestion at all...
0:30:34 > 0:30:36..outer space.
0:30:36 > 0:30:38This is a Peel Trident.
0:30:40 > 0:30:43The original was made on the Isle of Man for just a year,
0:30:43 > 0:30:451965 to 1966.
0:30:45 > 0:30:48But this one is a faithful modern replica.
0:30:50 > 0:30:52Back in the mid '60s everyone was space mad,
0:30:52 > 0:30:55which is why it looks like something from the Jetsons.
0:30:56 > 0:30:59This one, as you can hear, has an electric motor.
0:30:59 > 0:31:01The original had a 50cc petrol engine,
0:31:01 > 0:31:06a top speed of 38mph and, as usual, not enough wheels.
0:31:08 > 0:31:10Doesn't really solve anything.
0:31:10 > 0:31:12OK, it might look futuristic,
0:31:12 > 0:31:15but if you thought this space cadet capsule
0:31:15 > 0:31:17could ever be the way forward for mass transport,
0:31:17 > 0:31:19you'd need your head examined.
0:31:19 > 0:31:21You see, the reality is,
0:31:21 > 0:31:23if you want to change the world and save it,
0:31:23 > 0:31:26you actually need something quite large.
0:31:30 > 0:31:33It's not obviously a car, it's a van,
0:31:33 > 0:31:35and maybe even more than that,
0:31:35 > 0:31:39because at one point Ford took to calling it a "delivery system".
0:31:39 > 0:31:41A delivery system?
0:31:41 > 0:31:45Well, yes, but I'd go further than that.
0:31:45 > 0:31:47The Ford Transit was launched in the same year
0:31:47 > 0:31:50as the Lost in Space Peel Trident.
0:31:50 > 0:31:53But that's where the similarity ends.
0:31:53 > 0:31:56Over six million Transits have been produced to date.
0:31:56 > 0:32:00And as no-one buys one for fun, that tells us something.
0:32:03 > 0:32:07The Transit may actually be the most useful vehicle on our roads.
0:32:09 > 0:32:11There have been eight marks of Transit van
0:32:11 > 0:32:14but only three basic platforms.
0:32:14 > 0:32:17There are, however, innumerable variations
0:32:17 > 0:32:18on the Transit theme.
0:32:18 > 0:32:22There's the Luton, the drop side, the 3/4-door van,
0:32:22 > 0:32:254-door Crew Cab, the motorhome, the Connect van,
0:32:25 > 0:32:28the 2-door chassis cab, the One Way Tipper... I could go on!
0:32:28 > 0:32:30There's the Three Way Tipper,
0:32:30 > 0:32:32the 14-seat minibus, the 17-seat minibus,
0:32:32 > 0:32:35the 4x4, the XXL, the armoured van,
0:32:35 > 0:32:37the riot van, the long bonnet ice cream van...
0:32:39 > 0:32:41Children have been conceived in Transit vans,
0:32:41 > 0:32:45other people have been murdered in them, I don't doubt.
0:32:45 > 0:32:48Stolen goods have been transported,
0:32:48 > 0:32:50new televisions have been delivered to excited owners.
0:32:50 > 0:32:53You cannot think of a sphere of human activity
0:32:53 > 0:32:57that can't actually be improved by a Transit van.
0:32:57 > 0:33:00You could say this noble, heroic, big lump of metal
0:33:00 > 0:33:03has done more for the common man than any car.
0:33:03 > 0:33:06But, again, I'd go even further -
0:33:06 > 0:33:09in its own way, the Transit has helped save the world.
0:33:11 > 0:33:14Approaching now from the left of your television screens
0:33:14 > 0:33:18is the brand-new 2014, Mark VIII Transit van.
0:33:20 > 0:33:21Gorgeous.
0:33:21 > 0:33:25The Transit van has been the best- selling light commercial vehicle
0:33:25 > 0:33:28in Europe for over 40 years.
0:33:28 > 0:33:30Just sign there, please.
0:33:30 > 0:33:31Cheers.
0:33:32 > 0:33:34Saving the world?
0:33:34 > 0:33:36Well, in a way, I think it has, yes,
0:33:36 > 0:33:38because it's neatly nailed the very problem
0:33:38 > 0:33:41that all those makers of daft microcars were worried about -
0:33:41 > 0:33:44it has reduced congestion.
0:33:46 > 0:33:48Cheers, thanks.
0:33:50 > 0:33:53Look at me, not driving to the supermarket.
0:33:54 > 0:33:56So, that would appear to be that.
0:33:56 > 0:33:58The really small car, the microcar,
0:33:58 > 0:34:01is a terrible idea that came to nothing
0:34:01 > 0:34:05except a lame three-wheeled joke in a sitcom about market traders.
0:34:09 > 0:34:11Or is it?
0:34:11 > 0:34:14We've rather overlooked a country for whom making things smaller
0:34:14 > 0:34:16anybody thought possible
0:34:16 > 0:34:18is something of a cultural cornerstone.
0:34:18 > 0:34:20Japan.
0:34:20 > 0:34:23Could they make something of the microcar idea?
0:34:23 > 0:34:27The short answer - and not very wide or very tall either -
0:34:27 > 0:34:28is hai.
0:34:30 > 0:34:32Yes, Japan,
0:34:32 > 0:34:35home to the Karaoke Kids,
0:34:35 > 0:34:38used panty vending machines, Russian roulette for minors,
0:34:38 > 0:34:40aerobicised exercise English lessons...
0:34:46 > 0:34:49..and this, the Suzuki Wagon R.
0:34:49 > 0:34:52And it has everything you could want in a car -
0:34:52 > 0:34:55air-con, electric windows and mirrors, ABS, 4-speed automatic,
0:34:55 > 0:34:58Sat Nav... I'll stop at the cup holder
0:34:58 > 0:35:00before I turn into the brochure.
0:35:00 > 0:35:03The point is it's engineered like any other modern car.
0:35:03 > 0:35:05Just not quite as bigly.
0:35:05 > 0:35:10This is a so-called Kei car, short for Kei Jidosha,
0:35:10 > 0:35:14which translates rather disappointingly as "light car."
0:35:14 > 0:35:17Kei Jidosha is a set of regulations
0:35:17 > 0:35:20governing things like weight, dimensions and engine capacity.
0:35:20 > 0:35:25There's just 660cc under the bonnet of that baby.
0:35:25 > 0:35:28If you buy a Kei car, you pay less purchase tax
0:35:28 > 0:35:31than you would on a regular size car.
0:35:31 > 0:35:34There's also a weight tax in Japan. That's lower for a Kei car.
0:35:34 > 0:35:37Road tax, yes, that's lower, too.
0:35:37 > 0:35:40And in Japanese cities there are places where you can park a Kei car
0:35:40 > 0:35:43where you're not allowed to park a normal one.
0:35:43 > 0:35:45So, what's the catch?
0:35:45 > 0:35:47Well, there isn't one, really.
0:35:47 > 0:35:49As long as you accept your car looks a bit ridiculous.
0:35:51 > 0:35:55There are millions of Kei cars in Japan, especially in the cities.
0:35:56 > 0:35:59Over half of all Japanese households own one
0:35:59 > 0:36:01and it's not just regular cars.
0:36:01 > 0:36:05There are miniature Kei removal trucks, delivery vans...
0:36:06 > 0:36:08..and bin lorries.
0:36:08 > 0:36:11Meanwhile, down at the Tokyo Fire Department,
0:36:11 > 0:36:13Pugh san, Pugh San, Barney McGrew san,
0:36:13 > 0:36:16have started using Kei car fire engines
0:36:16 > 0:36:19as part of their rapid response fleet.
0:36:19 > 0:36:22TRUMPTON THEME TUNE
0:36:26 > 0:36:29It might look cute, but these are perfectly suited
0:36:29 > 0:36:33to emergencies in the narrow Tokyo Streets.
0:36:33 > 0:36:35Like a kitten stuck up a Bonsai tree.
0:36:40 > 0:36:42It's easy to see the logic behind all this.
0:36:42 > 0:36:45Japan is not a very big country.
0:36:45 > 0:36:47It's also a very populous one.
0:36:47 > 0:36:51More to the point, 75% of it is useless mountains,
0:36:51 > 0:36:53Fuji, and what have you,
0:36:53 > 0:36:56and that leaves very little room for rice,
0:36:56 > 0:36:58Sumo wrestlers,
0:36:58 > 0:37:02Hello Kitty, people, and cars.
0:37:02 > 0:37:05So, a few inches saved here and there,
0:37:05 > 0:37:07well, it all helps.
0:37:15 > 0:37:18This lack of space is almost certainly at the root
0:37:18 > 0:37:21of Japan's expertise in miniaturization.
0:37:21 > 0:37:24They can just make anything a bit smaller.
0:37:24 > 0:37:28Radios and personal hi-fi, obviously,
0:37:28 > 0:37:30but also trees, escalators,
0:37:30 > 0:37:32hotel rooms,
0:37:32 > 0:37:34even food staples.
0:37:34 > 0:37:37I mean, a grain of rice is smaller than a chip.
0:37:37 > 0:37:43However, saving space was not, originally, the point of Kei cars.
0:37:43 > 0:37:46It was all about, as usual, mobilising the masses.
0:37:50 > 0:37:52This is all going to sound a bit familiar.
0:37:52 > 0:37:56Post-war Japan was even worse than Europe.
0:37:56 > 0:38:00There was devastation, poverty, no raw materials.
0:38:00 > 0:38:02But the people's need for transport
0:38:02 > 0:38:06was just as great as their European counterparts.
0:38:06 > 0:38:11So, in 1949, Japan's Ministry of International Trade and Industry
0:38:11 > 0:38:14came up with a sort of people's car plan.
0:38:14 > 0:38:16Not one of those Ein Volk Ein Auto plans,
0:38:16 > 0:38:18like the Germans had with the Beetle.
0:38:18 > 0:38:20More a simple set of rules.
0:38:20 > 0:38:24They called for a car with an engine of not more than 150cc,
0:38:24 > 0:38:29not more than a metre wide, and costing no more than 150,000 Yen.
0:38:29 > 0:38:34The idea was this would encourage development of new domestic models.
0:38:34 > 0:38:36Japanese industry looked at this
0:38:36 > 0:38:39and said, "Soddu offu! It's not possible."
0:38:40 > 0:38:44So they lobbied government for some more reasonable rules
0:38:44 > 0:38:47on engine sizes, dimensions, price, and all the rest of it.
0:38:47 > 0:38:49They made some prototypes
0:38:49 > 0:38:54and in about ten years they started making things like this.
0:38:55 > 0:38:58This is the work of the Uchiyama Manufacturing Corporation.
0:38:58 > 0:39:01They made cork for bottle stoppers
0:39:01 > 0:39:04and all the other things cork is made for.
0:39:04 > 0:39:08And they thought, "We'll have a go at this car lark," and set up an automotive division.
0:39:09 > 0:39:13And this is what they came up with. It's called the 360,
0:39:13 > 0:39:19because it has a 360cc rear-mounted V-Twin air-cooled engine.
0:39:19 > 0:39:20All very people's car.
0:39:24 > 0:39:27I wonder what became of the Uchiyama Manufacturing Corporation's
0:39:27 > 0:39:30automotive division.
0:39:32 > 0:39:36So while we in Europe we were still mucking about with three-wheel
0:39:36 > 0:39:39back-to-frontmobiles, Japan let the people who actually make cars
0:39:39 > 0:39:42get hold of the rules and solve the problems.
0:39:44 > 0:39:46And I have to say
0:39:46 > 0:39:49it is very small, it is fairly basic,
0:39:49 > 0:39:51but it is a proper car.
0:39:51 > 0:39:53As somebody once said of Richard Hammond -
0:39:53 > 0:39:56"He's like a person, only smaller."
0:39:56 > 0:39:57That's true of this, as well.
0:40:00 > 0:40:04If you're a regular Top Gear viewer, you might be a bit disappointed
0:40:04 > 0:40:07that this programme is full of stupid, small cars,
0:40:07 > 0:40:10but, I have to say, I'm enjoying myself immensely.
0:40:14 > 0:40:17This area where I'm driving, on the outskirts of Tokyo,
0:40:17 > 0:40:19is proper old Japan.
0:40:19 > 0:40:22The streetscape, the street plan,
0:40:22 > 0:40:25is as it has been for hundreds of years,
0:40:25 > 0:40:28ie, not really designed for cars.
0:40:28 > 0:40:30So you can see already
0:40:30 > 0:40:34the benefits of having a small car mentality are paying dividends.
0:40:34 > 0:40:36I have, for example, lost our camera car,
0:40:36 > 0:40:38which is a Land Rover Discovery.
0:40:40 > 0:40:42The reason I can't see our camera car
0:40:42 > 0:40:45is because it's managed to get itself stuck
0:40:45 > 0:40:46on the narrow rural lanes
0:40:46 > 0:40:51and leave some of its paint on a 1,000-year-old village fence.
0:40:52 > 0:40:54Are you stuck, camera car?
0:40:59 > 0:41:02I don't want to appear smug or anything
0:41:02 > 0:41:04but I could get two of these through there.
0:41:04 > 0:41:07One-nil to the Uchiyama Manufacturing Corporation.
0:41:07 > 0:41:09HE LAUGHS
0:41:22 > 0:41:27What is it that made the Japanese so good at this small car lark?
0:41:27 > 0:41:29Simple necessity, perhaps?
0:41:29 > 0:41:30Maybe it's because Japan
0:41:30 > 0:41:33was prevented from re-arming after the war,
0:41:33 > 0:41:36so all its big brains went into things like cars,
0:41:36 > 0:41:38motorcycles, not fighter aircraft,
0:41:38 > 0:41:41missile systems programmes, and Star Wars.
0:41:41 > 0:41:44Maybe it's because the Kei car rules
0:41:44 > 0:41:46were reasonable, they were the result of ongoing
0:41:46 > 0:41:49intelligent dialogue between government and industry,
0:41:49 > 0:41:53rather than some arbitrary nonsense about three wheels or four wheels,
0:41:53 > 0:41:57or bike licences, or no licence at all, and all that nonsense.
0:41:57 > 0:42:01And it must be said that the benign restrictions of the Kei car class
0:42:01 > 0:42:05have been a constant spur to the ingenuity of their designers.
0:42:05 > 0:42:08They've come up with small metal folding roofs,
0:42:08 > 0:42:11tiny little turbochargers, and all that sort of stuff,
0:42:11 > 0:42:15and these cars have been a sort of showcase for technology
0:42:15 > 0:42:18that has quite frankly staggered the West.
0:42:18 > 0:42:21The Amara has automatic windscreen wipers.
0:42:21 > 0:42:25If I pour water onto this sensor here,
0:42:25 > 0:42:29they wipe automatically. Unbelievable.
0:42:31 > 0:42:33These early Kei cars
0:42:33 > 0:42:37are like the Dead Sea Scrolls of the Japanese car industry.
0:42:37 > 0:42:39Early evidence of a national enterprise
0:42:39 > 0:42:41that would go on to sweep the globe
0:42:41 > 0:42:46and almost destroy the old motor industries of Britain and America.
0:42:46 > 0:42:50But, for all the eventual global dominance of Suzuki, Diahatsu,
0:42:50 > 0:42:52Toyota, Mazda and the like,
0:42:52 > 0:42:56the Kei cars themselves still have a rather glaring shortcoming.
0:42:56 > 0:42:59HORNS BLARE
0:43:05 > 0:43:07Since I'm not doing anything,
0:43:07 > 0:43:10I haven't been for the last 20 minutes,
0:43:10 > 0:43:11it's a good time to consider
0:43:11 > 0:43:14the fundamental flaw of the Kei car philosophy.
0:43:14 > 0:43:16Of all microcars, in fact.
0:43:16 > 0:43:19Yes, they're very good for small parking spaces,
0:43:19 > 0:43:22they're very good for negotiating those tiny side streets in Tokyo
0:43:22 > 0:43:27and Kyoto, even Siena in Italy, or a small Cotswold village in England,
0:43:27 > 0:43:30but they don't actually deal with this problem.
0:43:30 > 0:43:33They don't deal with congestion
0:43:33 > 0:43:36because they can't make another lane for themselves.
0:43:36 > 0:43:39Now, we all get very excited about buying a very short car,
0:43:39 > 0:43:43a smart car, a G-Wiz, but actually length isn't the issue.
0:43:43 > 0:43:48The road is infinitely long but it's finitely wide.
0:43:48 > 0:43:52To get through that, you need something very narrow.
0:43:54 > 0:43:57Narrower than Jeremy Clarkson's mind.
0:43:59 > 0:44:03It's been in production since 1958.
0:44:03 > 0:44:08It's been made in over 20 countries around the world.
0:44:09 > 0:44:15It is a product of the Rising Sun on which the sun never sets.
0:44:15 > 0:44:17It's the Honda Super Cub.
0:44:19 > 0:44:21And this little bike has done more
0:44:21 > 0:44:25to get the people mobile than any car in history.
0:44:25 > 0:44:28Pretty much the least motorcycle you can get away with.
0:44:28 > 0:44:32The frame is made of pressed steel welded together,
0:44:32 > 0:44:35the leg guards are just a piece of plastic,
0:44:35 > 0:44:40the engine's just 50cc and it has only three gears,
0:44:40 > 0:44:42but they're very cleverly spaced.
0:44:42 > 0:44:45Two and three are for cruising along,
0:44:45 > 0:44:50one is for climbing up hills, very steep hills, as it happens.
0:44:50 > 0:44:54So, you bought a 50cc motorcycle, but Honda gave you a mountain.
0:44:59 > 0:45:02Thing is, of course, it's brilliant because
0:45:02 > 0:45:04it was the work of Sochiro Honda,
0:45:04 > 0:45:07one of the greatest automotive minds that ever lived.
0:45:07 > 0:45:12Honda, unimpressed with the dirty, unreliable bikes of the time,
0:45:12 > 0:45:15wanted to make something that catered to the Japanese market.
0:45:15 > 0:45:18So the Cub had an enclosed chain,
0:45:18 > 0:45:20big wheels for Japans unmade roads,
0:45:20 > 0:45:24very deep mudguards and that small but efficient motor.
0:45:24 > 0:45:26But Honda's real masterstroke was in marketing the Cub
0:45:26 > 0:45:29as a clean, safe and female friendly,
0:45:29 > 0:45:32completely overturning the reputation
0:45:32 > 0:45:34that motorcycles had in America.
0:45:35 > 0:45:39By contrast, the Honda Super Cub was like a tea towel with puppies on it.
0:45:39 > 0:45:42You meet the nicest people on a Honda.
0:45:42 > 0:45:46The Cub subsequently became an unprecedented hit in the States,
0:45:46 > 0:45:50in Japan, and in developing countries all over the world.
0:45:50 > 0:45:55The VW beetle - 21-point-something million made.
0:45:55 > 0:45:59The Fiat 124 and its derivatives, we think around 20 million.
0:45:59 > 0:46:03The Ford Model T - 13-point-something million.
0:46:03 > 0:46:04But this is chicken feed.
0:46:04 > 0:46:07The Honda Super Cub to date...
0:46:07 > 0:46:1285 million and counting.
0:46:13 > 0:46:18It's by far the most successful vehicle of any kind in history.
0:46:18 > 0:46:20But, for all its adaptability,
0:46:20 > 0:46:24it was designed with a very specific task in mind.
0:46:24 > 0:46:27Back in the 1950s, when the Super Cub was being developed,
0:46:27 > 0:46:31the staple lunch of the Japanese working population
0:46:31 > 0:46:33was takeaway delivery noodles.
0:46:33 > 0:46:35Still is for a lot of people, of course.
0:46:35 > 0:46:37And the noodles used to be delivered by bicycle.
0:46:37 > 0:46:39The rider would go one-handed,
0:46:39 > 0:46:42one hand on the handlebars, one hand to carry
0:46:42 > 0:46:45the delicious lunch item.
0:46:45 > 0:46:48For this reason, old man Honda decreed that it must be possible
0:46:48 > 0:46:52to ride the Cub one-handed, because that way every single
0:46:52 > 0:46:56noodle shop in Japan would buy one for deliveries.
0:46:56 > 0:47:00And that is why the Super Cub still has a proper motorcycle gear change
0:47:00 > 0:47:03that you operate with your foot but
0:47:03 > 0:47:05has no clutch on the left hand handlebar
0:47:05 > 0:47:08because the clutch is an automatic centrifugal device.
0:47:08 > 0:47:11Now, Honda made a big deal of this at the Cub's launch.
0:47:11 > 0:47:16The publicity picture showed it standing outside a noodle shop.
0:47:16 > 0:47:20It was in fact this very noodle shop.
0:47:20 > 0:47:24And that's given me an idea for a race.
0:47:24 > 0:47:26To demonstrate that this little bike,
0:47:26 > 0:47:29not the microcar, is the true people's champion,
0:47:29 > 0:47:33we're going to have a bike versus Kei car noodle delivery race.
0:47:35 > 0:47:38Starting from this historic shop, I'll bike some steaming soba noodles
0:47:38 > 0:47:42ten miles across town to the Global Honda headquarters
0:47:42 > 0:47:44in central Tokyo.
0:47:44 > 0:47:46There, I shall offer them in homage
0:47:46 > 0:47:50to the current Honda Super Cub executive, Mr Takeyama.
0:47:51 > 0:47:53And my four-wheeled competition?
0:47:53 > 0:47:58Mr Toshio Suzuki, Formula One driver and Le Mans 24 Hour winner.
0:47:58 > 0:48:01There's only one rule -
0:48:01 > 0:48:04the noodles must still be at least 50 degrees C on delivery.
0:48:06 > 0:48:09Mr Suzuki wouldn't be seen dead in a Suzuki
0:48:09 > 0:48:12so instead I have arranged for him to drive this -
0:48:12 > 0:48:14it's the Diahatsu Copen.
0:48:14 > 0:48:16Now, it looks like a shoe
0:48:16 > 0:48:19but it is a perfectly miniaturized Kei sportscar.
0:48:19 > 0:48:22It has a 650cc turbo-charged engine,
0:48:22 > 0:48:27which will do 118mph, and has a removable roof.
0:48:27 > 0:48:30Now all that remains is to decide who
0:48:30 > 0:48:32goes in to buy the noodles first.
0:48:32 > 0:48:35And we will decide that with a game of Janken.
0:48:37 > 0:48:38Jan...ken.
0:48:42 > 0:48:43Honourable victory.
0:49:22 > 0:49:23Finally, I'm on the move.
0:49:23 > 0:49:25It might not be the quickest start,
0:49:25 > 0:49:28but I can't really blame that all on the bike.
0:49:31 > 0:49:35Suzuki may be way out in front, but now that I'm on the Super Cub,
0:49:35 > 0:49:38I can exploit its nimble thinness
0:49:38 > 0:49:40on the congested Tokyo roads.
0:49:40 > 0:49:42Select a gear.
0:49:43 > 0:49:47Victory is a good as in the noodle pot.
0:49:53 > 0:49:57I should explain I have a temperature gauge on the handlebars
0:49:57 > 0:50:01and a thermocouple in the noodles to tell me how hot they still are.
0:50:01 > 0:50:02They're 72 degrees.
0:50:03 > 0:50:06They can't fall below the ideal Japanese temperature
0:50:06 > 0:50:09because that would be dishonourable.
0:50:09 > 0:50:12Oh, sodding traffic lights!
0:50:12 > 0:50:14Japan's full of them.
0:50:16 > 0:50:19I have to say, I thought this was going to be a doddle.
0:50:19 > 0:50:21In a straight-up urban race
0:50:21 > 0:50:24I was sure the Cub would win, no problem.
0:50:24 > 0:50:26Oh, God, traffic lights.
0:50:26 > 0:50:27Come on!
0:50:27 > 0:50:30But suburban Japan seems to contain more red lights
0:50:30 > 0:50:33than downtown Amsterdam.
0:50:33 > 0:50:35Every single set of traffic lights is red.
0:50:37 > 0:50:39Mr Suzuki, on the other hand,
0:50:39 > 0:50:42is scything through the lights like a samurai.
0:50:49 > 0:50:51As my noodles get ever cooler
0:50:51 > 0:50:54and Mr Honda starts considering a pizza instead,
0:50:54 > 0:50:56Mr Suzuki and the Kei car are powering on.
0:50:56 > 0:51:00He's already stormed through the level crossing at Jiyugaoka,
0:51:00 > 0:51:01nearly half a mile ahead of me.
0:51:01 > 0:51:04But I am starting to catch up.
0:51:04 > 0:51:06Hooray! Been through a green light!
0:51:09 > 0:51:11I didn't think that was possible.
0:51:11 > 0:51:13Right, I think I'm through the worst of it.
0:51:13 > 0:51:16Time to give it 50cc worth of...
0:51:19 > 0:51:20Trains!
0:51:32 > 0:51:34Another train.
0:51:43 > 0:51:46I'm now hopelessly behind.
0:51:46 > 0:51:51Mr Suzuki and the Kei car are already over halfway to Honda
0:51:51 > 0:51:53and approaching downtown.
0:51:53 > 0:51:57But, like the Super Cub itself, I just carry on.
0:51:57 > 0:52:01The Cub is not fast, not by modern small bike standards,
0:52:01 > 0:52:03but it keeps going.
0:52:03 > 0:52:07And as I at last hit a long straight of open road
0:52:07 > 0:52:10I can finally deploy the ancient motorcycle secret
0:52:10 > 0:52:12of putting your head down a little bit.
0:52:18 > 0:52:21Up ahead, Mr Suzuki has become so over-confident
0:52:21 > 0:52:23he's started to listen to his audio tapes
0:52:23 > 0:52:25of aerobicised English lessons.
0:52:31 > 0:52:34Little does he know I'm hard on his tail.
0:52:35 > 0:52:36Come on, baby.
0:52:38 > 0:52:40Have I got the balls?
0:52:40 > 0:52:42Yee-ha!
0:52:46 > 0:52:49We're now just two miles away from Honda HQ
0:52:49 > 0:52:52and getting deep into downtown Tokyo.
0:52:52 > 0:52:54HE CHOKES
0:52:54 > 0:52:56I need one of those Japanese mask things.
0:52:58 > 0:53:00But just ahead is Shubiya junction,
0:53:00 > 0:53:03the busiest crossing in the whole of Japan.
0:53:06 > 0:53:08I may be here a while.
0:53:08 > 0:53:11This is the famous crossroads.
0:53:11 > 0:53:15Yes, it was in Lost in Translation.
0:53:15 > 0:53:19As roughly 3 billion people cross in front of me,
0:53:19 > 0:53:22I notice someone driving a distinctive red car.
0:53:22 > 0:53:25Oh, cock! How did he get there?
0:53:28 > 0:53:31I've just seen the Copen go the other way
0:53:31 > 0:53:33across the famous Shibuya crossing,
0:53:33 > 0:53:36and my noodles are down to 55.
0:53:39 > 0:53:41Mr Suzuki knows the territory.
0:53:42 > 0:53:44And he is a racing driver, let's be honest.
0:53:46 > 0:53:49Trying to stick to the route I'd memorised was getting me nowhere.
0:53:49 > 0:53:52It was time to think of the Super Cub delivery boy,
0:53:52 > 0:53:56use my noodle and head off the map.
0:53:58 > 0:54:00Not down there.
0:54:02 > 0:54:04Turn right here, take a short cut.
0:54:10 > 0:54:12Soon I began to suspect the two Mexicans
0:54:12 > 0:54:16fighting over a broken television is the sign for pedestrian zone.
0:54:16 > 0:54:20But it's got me exactly where I want to be.
0:54:21 > 0:54:23Now I've got him!
0:54:31 > 0:54:34And thanks to a kamikaze lady with an umbrella,
0:54:34 > 0:54:36I take the lead.
0:54:37 > 0:54:39With just a mile to go to Honda,
0:54:39 > 0:54:41Kei car and Cub are neck and neck,
0:54:41 > 0:54:45but now I know that main roads are for losers.
0:54:45 > 0:54:4850cc versus 650c and a turbo charger,
0:54:48 > 0:54:51I need to find a really short cut.
0:54:52 > 0:54:53This'll do.
0:55:00 > 0:55:03This is why the Super Cub is the people's choice.
0:55:03 > 0:55:05Yes, I might have had a bit of a shaky start,
0:55:05 > 0:55:09but let's not forget, the Cub that I'm riding is 50 years old,
0:55:09 > 0:55:12but it can still dart through the streets
0:55:12 > 0:55:14like a metal fighting fish.
0:55:15 > 0:55:17Nothing can stop noodles.
0:55:25 > 0:55:30Noodles 53 - that's still hot enough for any executive. Whoa!
0:55:30 > 0:55:32Less than half a mile to go.
0:55:32 > 0:55:33Victory is at hand.
0:55:33 > 0:55:36Every time you ride a Honda Super Cub
0:55:36 > 0:55:39it's with the ghost of Sochiro himself on the pillion seat.
0:55:39 > 0:55:41Laughing at the success of his creation.
0:55:43 > 0:55:48I think it's time for Little Honda, by the Hondells.
0:55:48 > 0:55:51# It's all right, it's all right... #
0:55:51 > 0:55:53That's the Honda HQ, right there.
0:55:53 > 0:55:55# I'm gonna wake you up early
0:55:55 > 0:55:57# Cos I'm gonna take a ride with you
0:55:59 > 0:56:03# We're goin' down to the Honda shop I'll tell you what we're gonna do. #
0:56:03 > 0:56:06Noodles at 51 degrees.
0:56:06 > 0:56:08No sign of Suzuki.
0:56:12 > 0:56:15Er...Takeyama San?
0:56:16 > 0:56:18Konichiwa.
0:56:18 > 0:56:20For Takeyama San.
0:56:20 > 0:56:24- Hi!- Takeyama San? - Yes.- Your noodles.
0:56:26 > 0:56:30- 51 degrees.- Thank you. - Delivered from the Super Cub.
0:56:32 > 0:56:34A pleasure.
0:56:34 > 0:56:35Thank you.
0:56:35 > 0:56:37Pleasure. Honda Super Cub.
0:56:37 > 0:56:3951 degrees.
0:56:44 > 0:56:47As the Hondells said, it's not a big motorcycle,
0:56:47 > 0:56:49just a groovy little motorbike.
0:56:53 > 0:56:56But it has condemned Mr Suzuki, with his lukewarm lunch,
0:56:56 > 0:56:58to shame and dishonour.
0:57:02 > 0:57:04Close, but no Kei car.
0:57:06 > 0:57:09So, the microcar, whether in Japan or Europe,
0:57:09 > 0:57:12never really dealt with the challenges posed by congestion.
0:57:12 > 0:57:15It was just quite easy to park.
0:57:18 > 0:57:20As for the Super Cub,
0:57:20 > 0:57:24well, I liked it so much I rode it all the way back to England.
0:57:29 > 0:57:32This difficult period in the history of the people's car,
0:57:32 > 0:57:34the '50s and 60s,
0:57:34 > 0:57:38seems to have yielded an unlikely pair of champions,
0:57:38 > 0:57:41because neither of them is a car.
0:57:42 > 0:57:43And, let's not forget,
0:57:43 > 0:57:48this is exactly how the modern world works, with vans and small bikes.
0:57:48 > 0:57:51Back in the early noughties, the buzz-word of the day was
0:57:51 > 0:57:53"Go for it!"
0:57:53 > 0:57:56But now we realise that that's all complete nonsense.
0:57:56 > 0:58:00Why not just have whatever "it" is delivered?
0:58:00 > 0:58:02But let's not write the '50s and '60s off just yet.
0:58:02 > 0:58:04They did, of course,
0:58:04 > 0:58:08produce one of the greatest people's cars of all time.
0:58:08 > 0:58:10Some of you will have guessed what it is.
0:58:10 > 0:58:14Some of you will be screaming at the television. "Come on!
0:58:14 > 0:58:15"Where is it?"
0:58:15 > 0:58:18Well, don't worry, because it's here.
0:58:18 > 0:58:21The Rolls-Royce Silver Shadow.
0:58:22 > 0:58:23See you next time.