Episode 1

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0:00:02 > 0:00:05A lot of people with mental health issues hide it so well.

0:00:05 > 0:00:07You wear a mask, day-to-day.

0:00:08 > 0:00:12Our mental health - invisible, little talked about,

0:00:12 > 0:00:13and little understood.

0:00:13 > 0:00:17People assume that depression is all about being sad, and it's not.

0:00:17 > 0:00:20It's mostly just feeling absolutely nothing.

0:00:20 > 0:00:23Just feeling completely hollow.

0:00:23 > 0:00:24It's estimated one in four adults

0:00:24 > 0:00:27will need professional help for mental health problems

0:00:27 > 0:00:29at some stage of their life.

0:00:29 > 0:00:31It's a massive issue.

0:00:31 > 0:00:34Chances are, we all know someone who's suffering.

0:00:34 > 0:00:37I don't want sympathy, I don't want empathy.

0:00:37 > 0:00:38Just a bit of understanding.

0:00:38 > 0:00:40That's all.

0:00:40 > 0:00:41I don't take any antidepressants.

0:00:41 > 0:00:44I'm not in counselling or therapy or anything at the moment.

0:00:44 > 0:00:47I want to find another coping mechanism

0:00:47 > 0:00:52that would be able to work with me for the foreseeable future.

0:00:52 > 0:00:56Now, ten volunteers have agreed to try something different...

0:00:56 > 0:00:58- Here we go!- A running programme.

0:00:58 > 0:01:01Exercise CAN help with mental health issues.

0:01:01 > 0:01:04This is going to give them the community, the structure.

0:01:04 > 0:01:05It's going to give them the endorphins,

0:01:05 > 0:01:08it's going to give them all these kind of positive factors.

0:01:08 > 0:01:10You're convinced it can help mental health?

0:01:10 > 0:01:12Most definitely. From personal experience.

0:01:12 > 0:01:13I've set the volunteers,

0:01:13 > 0:01:15each battling their own mental health problems,

0:01:15 > 0:01:17the ultimate running challenge -

0:01:17 > 0:01:21completing the 2017 London Marathon.

0:01:21 > 0:01:23Nice and easy, guys. Nice and easy.

0:01:23 > 0:01:25Alongside a team of experts,

0:01:25 > 0:01:28I'll be there to help them reach the finish line.

0:01:28 > 0:01:31- Hi, guys!- They'll be getting some special support

0:01:31 > 0:01:34from the Royals whose campaign, Heads Together,

0:01:34 > 0:01:37aims to change the way we talk about mental health.

0:01:37 > 0:01:39The whole point of the campaign, with the marathon,

0:01:39 > 0:01:42I think we really just want to reduce the stigma.

0:01:42 > 0:01:43As a nation, we need to grip this.

0:01:43 > 0:01:46Because talking about mental health is best for everybody.

0:01:46 > 0:01:47It doesn't matter who you are.

0:01:47 > 0:01:50You're the heroes, because you're standing out there,

0:01:50 > 0:01:51very bravely, telling your stories.

0:01:51 > 0:01:53You're very, very special.

0:01:53 > 0:01:57I've just told, potentially, the future king of the country,

0:01:57 > 0:01:59why I'm doing what I'm doing.

0:01:59 > 0:02:02Accomplishing 26 gruelling miles

0:02:02 > 0:02:05is not just a punishing physical undertaking,

0:02:05 > 0:02:06but a mental one too.

0:02:06 > 0:02:09I'm a failure, and I'm not going to be able to do it.

0:02:11 > 0:02:14Putting one foot in front of the other,

0:02:14 > 0:02:16every single day at the moment.

0:02:16 > 0:02:20For these ten, the marathon challenge will be all the greater.

0:02:20 > 0:02:22Some days I don't want to get out of bed.

0:02:22 > 0:02:23Can we stop? I don't...

0:02:23 > 0:02:25I can't be arsed to talk about this any more.

0:02:25 > 0:02:27And I'll be at hand to help them through.

0:02:27 > 0:02:29- Do you want a hug?- Yes.

0:02:29 > 0:02:35You have no idea how amazing I think you are, just for surviving.

0:02:35 > 0:02:37If they can succeed...

0:02:37 > 0:02:39The endorphins are kicking in!

0:02:39 > 0:02:41..it could change their lives forever.

0:02:41 > 0:02:43CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:02:51 > 0:02:52Across the country,

0:02:52 > 0:02:57ten volunteers are about to embark on the challenge of their lives.

0:02:57 > 0:02:59How many days are you going for?

0:02:59 > 0:03:01- Three... Two.- OK.

0:03:01 > 0:03:04I'm quite a determined kind of person.

0:03:04 > 0:03:06I think I've had to be for the last four years,

0:03:06 > 0:03:09and I am determined to do this.

0:03:10 > 0:03:11Right...

0:03:11 > 0:03:15You know, I also understand that I'm not alone in this whole...

0:03:15 > 0:03:18sort of lonely world at times, which it is - a very lonely world

0:03:18 > 0:03:21when you're suffering with things that people don't always understand.

0:03:21 > 0:03:25So I've got some trousers, some tops,

0:03:25 > 0:03:27obviously my running shoes.

0:03:27 > 0:03:28And, that's it.

0:03:29 > 0:03:32I don't know, I don't want to start getting my underwear out!

0:03:32 > 0:03:34SHE LAUGHS

0:03:34 > 0:03:37For some, just travelling 200 miles to the training camp

0:03:37 > 0:03:39will be a huge challenge.

0:03:39 > 0:03:40You wouldn't know,

0:03:40 > 0:03:42unless you actually knew me,

0:03:42 > 0:03:44that there was anything wrong.

0:03:44 > 0:03:47You've got to understand, inside, I'm broken.

0:03:47 > 0:03:51Steve experiences severe anxiety caused by traumatic events.

0:03:51 > 0:03:54He avoids busy public places,

0:03:54 > 0:03:58and hasn't braved a long train journey for 15 years.

0:03:58 > 0:03:59Right now, I'm sweating.

0:03:59 > 0:04:01I'm shaking.

0:04:01 > 0:04:03My anxiety is starting just a little bit.

0:04:04 > 0:04:06And I haven't even got through the door.

0:04:08 > 0:04:09It's awkward.

0:04:12 > 0:04:14We've invited our ten volunteers to a two-day training camp

0:04:14 > 0:04:16at Bisham Abbey in Buckinghamshire,

0:04:16 > 0:04:19one of Sport England's National Sports Centres.

0:04:20 > 0:04:22It's the first time we're all going to meet.

0:04:24 > 0:04:25I'm really excited.

0:04:25 > 0:04:27I'm really excited to meet the people

0:04:27 > 0:04:30who are going to be involved in this project.

0:04:30 > 0:04:32It's a big, ambitious project.

0:04:32 > 0:04:35I'm interested to see how many actually turn up,

0:04:35 > 0:04:36and get into the room.

0:04:36 > 0:04:38I know for a lot of people

0:04:38 > 0:04:40with mental health issues,

0:04:40 > 0:04:42even walking into a room of people

0:04:42 > 0:04:45and starting out on a project like this is a big deal.

0:04:45 > 0:04:48- Hello.- Hi, nice to meet you, I'm George.

0:04:48 > 0:04:49- Hello, George. I'm Nick.- Hi, Nick.

0:04:49 > 0:04:52How are you? Nervous?

0:04:52 > 0:04:55- Yes...- I am, a bit. - Yeah, I think I'm more excited,

0:04:55 > 0:04:57a bit apprehensive rather than nervous.

0:04:58 > 0:05:00- Hello, there.- Hi.

0:05:00 > 0:05:01How are you?

0:05:02 > 0:05:05- Yeah...- A bit nervous?

0:05:05 > 0:05:07- Yeah.- Well done.- Thank you.

0:05:07 > 0:05:09Well done for actual being in the room.

0:05:09 > 0:05:11- Yeah.- Can we get you a cup of tea or a cup...

0:05:11 > 0:05:13a glass of water or...

0:05:13 > 0:05:16I'll be all right in just a minute, just give me five seconds.

0:05:16 > 0:05:17Of course I can.

0:05:17 > 0:05:20Let me just... I'll pour a cup of water anyway.

0:05:20 > 0:05:23HE EXHALES

0:05:23 > 0:05:25It's overwhelming, do you know what I mean?

0:05:25 > 0:05:28- It's a lot for me to take on.- Yeah.

0:05:32 > 0:05:34- Hello! Paul?- Hello, Nick.

0:05:34 > 0:05:35Yeah, nice to meet you.

0:05:35 > 0:05:39The volunteers have a range of mental health conditions...

0:05:39 > 0:05:41That's how everyone felt coming in the door.

0:05:41 > 0:05:43Hi, I'm Rhian.

0:05:43 > 0:05:45..and different levels of physical ability.

0:05:46 > 0:05:47Jake is one of the fittest.

0:05:47 > 0:05:51Last year, during a period of deep depression,

0:05:51 > 0:05:52he found the benefit of hiking

0:05:52 > 0:05:56and decided to undertake a six-month solo walking challenge

0:05:56 > 0:05:59to raise awareness about mental health.

0:05:59 > 0:06:02Depression is something that I've kind of lived with

0:06:02 > 0:06:04for longer than I was willing to admit.

0:06:04 > 0:06:06It took for me to get really bad...

0:06:08 > 0:06:10..to actually think, "Right, I'm struggling here.

0:06:10 > 0:06:11"I really need some help."

0:06:11 > 0:06:14I'm glad it happened to me because it's made me realise

0:06:14 > 0:06:15what other people live with,

0:06:15 > 0:06:18and a lot of people don't see any way out,

0:06:18 > 0:06:21and they don't realise that other people go through that.

0:06:21 > 0:06:25Feeling, feeling completely alone, when you feel like that is...

0:06:25 > 0:06:27It's, you know, it's hell.

0:06:27 > 0:06:29Jake's passion to break down the stigma

0:06:29 > 0:06:31surrounding mental health problems

0:06:31 > 0:06:33has brought him here today.

0:06:33 > 0:06:34Hello. Jake? Here's a man, look,

0:06:34 > 0:06:37who instantly looks like he's come ready for running.

0:06:37 > 0:06:38How are you? Cup of tea, water?

0:06:38 > 0:06:40- I'd love a tea, please.- Tea?

0:06:40 > 0:06:43- Thank you.- Any particular type? Green tea or anything like that?

0:06:43 > 0:06:45Nick Knowles is making me a cup of tea!

0:06:45 > 0:06:46Just breakfast tea, if they've got one.

0:06:46 > 0:06:49Now I have to say, you're quite ahead of the game with this,

0:06:49 > 0:06:51cos you've gone and beasted yourself all over the country,

0:06:51 > 0:06:54- haven't you?- Yeah, well I kind of had a bit of a...

0:06:54 > 0:06:55Well, a meltdown, I suppose,

0:06:55 > 0:06:58is the word that is probably the most accurate.

0:06:59 > 0:07:01I decided to walk around the whole of Great Britain.

0:07:01 > 0:07:04As soon as I realised that I wanted to kind of give...

0:07:04 > 0:07:08give my condition some purpose, and give my life some direction,

0:07:08 > 0:07:10I found it easier to talk about,

0:07:10 > 0:07:13and now I feel like it doesn't have to be a big, horrible...

0:07:13 > 0:07:16"Sit down. We need to really discuss this."

0:07:16 > 0:07:18It can be a casual conversation.

0:07:18 > 0:07:19I really like that,

0:07:19 > 0:07:21and I really like that people are starting to wake up to that.

0:07:21 > 0:07:23I know first-hand the benefits of

0:07:23 > 0:07:25exercise for mental health.

0:07:25 > 0:07:29I have a form of OCD, and it's always helped me.

0:07:29 > 0:07:31I'm just game because I want to try something

0:07:31 > 0:07:34that's a different coping strategy to what I use already.

0:07:34 > 0:07:36I have bad coping strategies.

0:07:36 > 0:07:38- Do you?- Drink and gamble.

0:07:38 > 0:07:41Is that where you go with it?

0:07:41 > 0:07:42Yeah, when I'm really bad, yeah.

0:07:42 > 0:07:45The way I cope, really, is just not stopping.

0:07:45 > 0:07:47So, I'm worried sometimes I'm going to burn myself out

0:07:47 > 0:07:50cos I get up and I don't stop all day,

0:07:50 > 0:07:51because I think when you stop,

0:07:51 > 0:07:53sometimes that's when you think about it.

0:07:53 > 0:07:56I very rarely let myself cry because I think if you cry,

0:07:56 > 0:07:58you won't stop, and you don't want to fall into that hole

0:07:58 > 0:08:01and not be able to get out of it. You cling on to the edge, really,

0:08:01 > 0:08:03as long as you possibly can, really.

0:08:05 > 0:08:07Rhian's mental health issues

0:08:07 > 0:08:08started five years ago,

0:08:08 > 0:08:10after she suffered the sudden,

0:08:10 > 0:08:15tragic loss of her one-year old son George from pneumonia.

0:08:15 > 0:08:18He was rushed to the local hospital, and despite staff's efforts,

0:08:18 > 0:08:22and they were amazing members of staff, he died.

0:08:24 > 0:08:27And the effect that had on myself, my children,

0:08:27 > 0:08:31my husband and our family was just phenomenal, really.

0:08:31 > 0:08:34And a few days after losing my son, my husband,

0:08:34 > 0:08:38who was just completely traumatised by what had happened, you know,

0:08:38 > 0:08:41blamed himself for what had happened,

0:08:41 > 0:08:43just walked out of the house and never came home.

0:08:43 > 0:08:47Five days after losing their son and consumed by grief,

0:08:47 > 0:08:50Rhian's husband Paul took his own life.

0:08:52 > 0:08:54When I heard that he'd also passed away...

0:08:56 > 0:08:59..my life as I knew it was over.

0:08:59 > 0:09:01Me, as a person, changed forever.

0:09:03 > 0:09:08So for me, PTSD has been a huge thing that I've had to carry.

0:09:08 > 0:09:10The flashbacks keep me awake at night.

0:09:10 > 0:09:12I'm anxious just leaving the house.

0:09:12 > 0:09:14If I hear a car outside in the street,

0:09:14 > 0:09:16I get straight up and look through the window,

0:09:16 > 0:09:18because for me, it's the police and something's happened,

0:09:18 > 0:09:21and they've come back to tell me someone's died.

0:09:21 > 0:09:24The effect it has on you as a person, you know,

0:09:24 > 0:09:26I used to be very bubbly and confident,

0:09:26 > 0:09:28but actually inside, I feel...

0:09:28 > 0:09:29I feel dead myself.

0:09:38 > 0:09:40I think the fact that you're actually all here,

0:09:40 > 0:09:42and you've all made it to the start line,

0:09:42 > 0:09:43effectively, is a hell of a thing.

0:09:43 > 0:09:46Because that first step is the toughest step.

0:09:46 > 0:09:49Anybody feeling really uncomfortable at this point?

0:09:49 > 0:09:50All right? Good.

0:09:50 > 0:09:53The runners will be fully supported with access to a psychologist,

0:09:53 > 0:09:56two dedicated trainers, and a nutritionist.

0:09:58 > 0:10:01Charlie and Chevy are your running coaches.

0:10:01 > 0:10:03Both Charlie and Chevy have experienced

0:10:03 > 0:10:05mental health issues of their own,

0:10:05 > 0:10:09and now help others to use running as a coping mechanism.

0:10:09 > 0:10:12My job is to make you fall in love with the art of moving forward.

0:10:12 > 0:10:15The marathon is not a distance to be scared of.

0:10:15 > 0:10:17It seems like it's a really long way.

0:10:17 > 0:10:19It is a long way!

0:10:19 > 0:10:21It's not a long way. It's not a long way.

0:10:21 > 0:10:22It really is not a long way,

0:10:22 > 0:10:25and I think you kind of have to go into it just being like...

0:10:25 > 0:10:28I'm just going on a journey, I'm just going on this adventure.

0:10:28 > 0:10:30And also, it's a journey you're going to undertake

0:10:30 > 0:10:34in small segments, and before you know, you're kind of marathon-ready.

0:10:34 > 0:10:38My background is not too dissimilar to some people in this room,

0:10:38 > 0:10:41so for me, it was a tool that really changed my life.

0:10:41 > 0:10:46So that's why I'm really passionate about this project and you guys.

0:10:46 > 0:10:4920 weeks from now, you're going to be marathon-ready.

0:10:49 > 0:10:50Yeah.

0:10:50 > 0:10:52Look at these faces, people's faces!

0:10:52 > 0:10:54- Definitely! - OK, shall we start off down

0:10:54 > 0:10:57the long road towards the marathon, then? Ready?

0:10:58 > 0:11:00My daughter is really excited.

0:11:00 > 0:11:02Has a lot of faith in me.

0:11:02 > 0:11:04My son doesn't think I'm going to be able to do it

0:11:04 > 0:11:06because I'm too slow, but we'll see.

0:11:06 > 0:11:08Hopefully, I'll prove him wrong and they'll be there

0:11:08 > 0:11:10at the finish line to be proud of me.

0:11:10 > 0:11:12My fitness is better now than it's been for a long time,

0:11:12 > 0:11:13cos of the walking.

0:11:15 > 0:11:19And running is just faster walking, isn't it?

0:11:19 > 0:11:22I hate running. Yeah.

0:11:22 > 0:11:23Yeah, I absolutely hate it.

0:11:23 > 0:11:26Yeah, I'd just rather stay at home, have a cup of tea.

0:11:26 > 0:11:29I've never experienced anything like this, so...

0:11:29 > 0:11:32it's kind of like, what do I do? What do I say?

0:11:32 > 0:11:34Who am I supposed to look at?

0:11:34 > 0:11:36Who am I supposed to talk to?

0:11:36 > 0:11:38That kind of thing. And it's like...

0:11:38 > 0:11:41"Ahhh! Help!"

0:11:41 > 0:11:44So here we are, morning of the first boot camp.

0:11:44 > 0:11:47Two days ahead of us, what have you got planned for our ten?

0:11:47 > 0:11:48For us to get to know them.

0:11:48 > 0:11:53And just get a feel for how we can support them moving forward.

0:11:53 > 0:11:56This is going to give them, you know, the community,

0:11:56 > 0:11:57it's going to give them structure,

0:11:57 > 0:11:59it's going to give them the endorphins,

0:11:59 > 0:12:01it's going to give them all these kind of positive factors.

0:12:01 > 0:12:03It's going to give them a coping mechanism.

0:12:03 > 0:12:06- But you're convinced it can help mental health?- Most definitely.

0:12:06 > 0:12:07From personal experience, I know it works.

0:12:07 > 0:12:10If people stick with it, we will see a change?

0:12:10 > 0:12:13Most definitely. Running and mental health are really good companions.

0:12:14 > 0:12:18So how long is this first run you're going to take them on?

0:12:18 > 0:12:212K, just under, so we're just going to do a few loops,

0:12:21 > 0:12:22keep it close to home.

0:12:22 > 0:12:25Just get them to kind of look out for each other a little bit,

0:12:25 > 0:12:26and just get them moving.

0:12:26 > 0:12:28None of them chose to jog over here, did they?

0:12:28 > 0:12:30Tells me a lot!

0:12:30 > 0:12:33Right, let's get in a circle. Let's go.

0:12:33 > 0:12:35Even on a short run, injury is a possibility.

0:12:35 > 0:12:38We'll just start running on the spot, guys.

0:12:38 > 0:12:39Nice and gently.

0:12:39 > 0:12:42So learning how to warm up properly is the first invaluable lesson.

0:12:42 > 0:12:44I'm just going to ask you to bring your feet up a little bit higher,

0:12:44 > 0:12:47so we're just going to turn it up, pull them up a little bit...

0:12:47 > 0:12:50And you're probably asking yourself the question that they asked.

0:12:50 > 0:12:51Why aren't I running the marathon?

0:12:51 > 0:12:53Because that's my technique.

0:12:54 > 0:12:56Right, let's go. Nice and easy.

0:12:56 > 0:12:57Let's keep it nice and together.

0:13:00 > 0:13:01Don't trip over!

0:13:05 > 0:13:07I don't like being at the front,

0:13:07 > 0:13:09I've set unrealistic expectations for myself!

0:13:09 > 0:13:11Here's the first run for them.

0:13:11 > 0:13:13First chance to get their running legs on.

0:13:13 > 0:13:18From this small acorn, the giant oak of a full marathon will emerge

0:13:18 > 0:13:22within the next 140-odd days...

0:13:22 > 0:13:23We hope!

0:13:25 > 0:13:26Where's Steve? Come on, Steve.

0:13:26 > 0:13:28You OK? Right, cool.

0:13:28 > 0:13:31So, as we're going, most important thing,

0:13:31 > 0:13:34you just keep moving yourself forward and don't panic.

0:13:34 > 0:13:36Got to relax as well.

0:13:36 > 0:13:38In his 20s, Steve served in the RAF,

0:13:38 > 0:13:42but during this time he was involved in a fatal road accident

0:13:42 > 0:13:44which left him battling severe anxiety,

0:13:44 > 0:13:46low self-esteem and flashbacks,

0:13:46 > 0:13:50problems often labelled as PTSD -

0:13:50 > 0:13:52post-traumatic stress disorder.

0:13:52 > 0:13:55Some days I don't want to get out of bed.

0:13:55 > 0:13:58I go to bed on a night-time, I sleep two hours,

0:13:58 > 0:14:00then I'm awake all night.

0:14:01 > 0:14:05And even when I've had those two hours' sleep, I've been dreaming.

0:14:05 > 0:14:08I should have said nightmares, flashbacks,

0:14:08 > 0:14:09then I try to settle, and I can't

0:14:09 > 0:14:11because my brain won't let me calm down.

0:14:11 > 0:14:12It won't settle down.

0:14:14 > 0:14:16For me, going out's not easy.

0:14:16 > 0:14:17Totally hate supermarkets.

0:14:17 > 0:14:20When they're too busy, heart starts pounding.

0:14:20 > 0:14:23Can't breathe. Feel like I'm going to die.

0:14:23 > 0:14:26Sweating. Shaking.

0:14:27 > 0:14:29Just...

0:14:29 > 0:14:32uneasy, just want to run away, be out the way, get out the way.

0:14:32 > 0:14:35I'm forcing myself to do it because I need...

0:14:37 > 0:14:39..to get a grip.

0:14:39 > 0:14:42I can't keep running away, I've got to face up to certain things,

0:14:42 > 0:14:46I've got to be able to do them. Otherwise I'm going to have...

0:14:46 > 0:14:47a dull life.

0:14:49 > 0:14:52I feel like I should slow down and wait for Steve.

0:14:52 > 0:14:53Yeah.

0:14:54 > 0:14:56Shall we jog back to him?

0:14:56 > 0:14:58And jog WITH him, maybe?

0:14:58 > 0:14:59I'm doing that.

0:15:00 > 0:15:02Is this you guys dropping back to scoop us up?

0:15:02 > 0:15:05- Steve, we're coming back!- Thank you. All the way round us, please?

0:15:05 > 0:15:07And catch up. Yes, thank you.

0:15:07 > 0:15:08We are not leaving Steve behind.

0:15:08 > 0:15:11Definitely not. Definitely, definitely not. Good!

0:15:11 > 0:15:13Everyone here has their own motivation

0:15:13 > 0:15:15for wanting to run the marathon.

0:15:15 > 0:15:16This is good, people.

0:15:16 > 0:15:18We are liking all of this!

0:15:18 > 0:15:21Shereece first sank into a depression at school,

0:15:21 > 0:15:23when she was severely bullied.

0:15:23 > 0:15:26And after giving birth to her first child, Naima,

0:15:26 > 0:15:28she suffered with postnatal depression.

0:15:28 > 0:15:30I definitely needed to learn

0:15:30 > 0:15:31what I was going through,

0:15:31 > 0:15:33because it was new to me,

0:15:33 > 0:15:35because growing up in the house that I grew up in,

0:15:35 > 0:15:36everyone likes positivity.

0:15:36 > 0:15:39And I think it's a Caribbean thing as well?

0:15:39 > 0:15:41My culture doesn't like to...

0:15:42 > 0:15:46..acknowledge it. It's almost like bad vibes, in a way,

0:15:46 > 0:15:48and it's almost like if you speak about it,

0:15:48 > 0:15:50you're bringing it down on yourself.

0:15:50 > 0:15:54The word "can't" doesn't exist in this household,

0:15:54 > 0:15:55so I grew up in that kind of household

0:15:55 > 0:15:57where everything had to be strong.

0:15:57 > 0:15:59That's why I'm doing this, in a way,

0:15:59 > 0:16:01because I feel like even for my kids,

0:16:01 > 0:16:04I feel like if I get my generation understanding it,

0:16:04 > 0:16:06it can help the next generation.

0:16:10 > 0:16:11Lead crew in!

0:16:11 > 0:16:13HE WHISTLES AND APPLAUDS

0:16:13 > 0:16:15- How are we feeling?- Great.

0:16:15 > 0:16:16Good. I really enjoyed that.

0:16:16 > 0:16:17Warmed up a little bit, at least!

0:16:17 > 0:16:20Yeah. All the way in, all the way in, all the way in, all the way...

0:16:20 > 0:16:23We always run it all the way! Brilliant! Nice one, people.

0:16:23 > 0:16:27- Well done, guys.- When he comes in, big noise, big energy, yeah?

0:16:28 > 0:16:30From about now...

0:16:30 > 0:16:32CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:16:32 > 0:16:34More noise, more noise, more noise, more noise.

0:16:34 > 0:16:37More noise, more noise, more noise, more noise.

0:16:37 > 0:16:38Lovely. Nice one, my friend.

0:16:38 > 0:16:40Well done.

0:16:40 > 0:16:42It's clear that the physical challenge is going to be greater

0:16:42 > 0:16:44for some than others.

0:16:44 > 0:16:46- You OK?- Yeah.

0:16:46 > 0:16:48He's telling me that his body is like a Lamborghini

0:16:48 > 0:16:49that hasn't been used for a while!

0:16:49 > 0:16:52Quick change of oil, it'll be all back in shape, won't it?

0:16:52 > 0:16:55To have any chance of completing the marathon,

0:16:55 > 0:16:57they must embrace a carefully designed programme

0:16:57 > 0:16:59involving technical training.

0:16:59 > 0:17:01Now, what I want you to try and do,

0:17:01 > 0:17:02without breaking at the hips,

0:17:02 > 0:17:04is just lean forward.

0:17:06 > 0:17:08Strength and mobility work.

0:17:08 > 0:17:12Squeeze your bum cheeks, tighten up that core as tightly as possible.

0:17:12 > 0:17:14They need to learn to look after their muscles properly...

0:17:14 > 0:17:19I want you to find the knots and start working your way up...

0:17:19 > 0:17:21Here we go, find the knots, enjoy it!

0:17:21 > 0:17:26..and maintain a healthy diet under the guidance of nutritionist, Laura.

0:17:26 > 0:17:28Do you have any, sort of, overall concerns,

0:17:28 > 0:17:30at this point, about nutrition?

0:17:30 > 0:17:32Not really. I think I could eat a lot better.

0:17:33 > 0:17:35A lot better, really.

0:17:35 > 0:17:40OK. Why don't we just sort of walk through what a typical day is like,

0:17:40 > 0:17:42starting with breakfast?

0:17:42 > 0:17:44So I normally skip breakfast.

0:17:44 > 0:17:45OK, no breakfast...

0:17:47 > 0:17:53Then some days I'd go with no food then until about tea-time.

0:17:53 > 0:17:58It's really difficult, like, when I was married

0:17:58 > 0:18:02and had just a family, it just was so much easier.

0:18:02 > 0:18:04I'm going to get emotional.

0:18:04 > 0:18:05It's OK.

0:18:06 > 0:18:10Yeah, I had a purpose to cook in the evenings and things, and now...

0:18:11 > 0:18:16I just sort the kids out and make sure they're OK, and then I...

0:18:16 > 0:18:18I'll just eat whatever.

0:18:18 > 0:18:20Toast some nights, I've just lost...

0:18:21 > 0:18:24It's more the fact I've just lost interest, more than anything.

0:18:24 > 0:18:26But I know to do the marathon,

0:18:26 > 0:18:27I'm going to have to improve...

0:18:27 > 0:18:30improve that, and start looking after myself.

0:18:30 > 0:18:33I'm not very good at that. I can't believe I'm getting upset.

0:18:33 > 0:18:34- I never get upset.- No, no.

0:18:34 > 0:18:37You're an afterthought to yourself,

0:18:37 > 0:18:40after you've taken care of the kids and got them ready for bed,

0:18:40 > 0:18:43- and everything else.- Yes.

0:18:43 > 0:18:45There are things that we can do, and we'll work together.

0:18:45 > 0:18:46You're not alone in this.

0:18:46 > 0:18:49- Sorry. I never get upset.- It's OK.

0:18:49 > 0:18:52It's just really hard, you know, I had a family of five,

0:18:52 > 0:18:56we used to sit round the table as a family to eat, and I...

0:18:56 > 0:18:58The children sit on their own and I sit at the table,

0:18:58 > 0:19:00but I struggle to eat with them

0:19:00 > 0:19:04because you miss who used to be round the table as well.

0:19:04 > 0:19:07So it's a bit of an avoidance thing, I think, as well.

0:19:07 > 0:19:10- OK.- But, yeah, it's time to change things, you know?

0:19:10 > 0:19:13If I'm going to get fitter, I need to get healthier all around.

0:19:13 > 0:19:15All right, I'm going to give you a hug...

0:19:15 > 0:19:17- I'm so sorry, for getting upset. - No, it's OK, it's OK.

0:19:17 > 0:19:18It's all right.

0:19:18 > 0:19:23We'll ALL be on hand throughout the entire process to provide support,

0:19:23 > 0:19:27support we're also hoping the runners will find from each other.

0:19:27 > 0:19:29The boot camp isn't just about exercise,

0:19:29 > 0:19:35it's about allowing everyone a space to talk about the issues they face.

0:19:35 > 0:19:37One of my bones of contention,

0:19:37 > 0:19:40I don't know how else you'd phrase it, but, like...

0:19:40 > 0:19:43Even just, like, the phrase "mental health," I hate it,

0:19:43 > 0:19:46because it's got the word "mental" in it.

0:19:46 > 0:19:47People assume that you're mental,

0:19:47 > 0:19:50and there's something really, really wrong with you,

0:19:50 > 0:19:51when it's not that.

0:19:51 > 0:19:54It's just the fact that you've got this thing, and it's like...

0:19:54 > 0:19:55You're all right,

0:19:55 > 0:19:59you struggle and that, but you're not crazy.

0:19:59 > 0:20:00You know, I go see a therapist,

0:20:00 > 0:20:03and I've got a supportive family and I go,

0:20:03 > 0:20:05and I have whatever medication I'm on,

0:20:05 > 0:20:07so, like, instead of being like that all the time,

0:20:07 > 0:20:08I'm just a bit like that,

0:20:08 > 0:20:10and sometimes it's a bit like that...

0:20:10 > 0:20:12I think it's more accepted if it's a woman,

0:20:12 > 0:20:15I think for men you lot still have to man up.

0:20:15 > 0:20:17It's the stigma, with guys, I think, like,

0:20:17 > 0:20:19you don't want to be labelled a downer

0:20:19 > 0:20:20in your group, or whatever.

0:20:20 > 0:20:23Yeah, that's the toughest thing about dealing with depression,

0:20:23 > 0:20:25it's like I just went in on myself,

0:20:25 > 0:20:27like, I didn't want to leave the house.

0:20:27 > 0:20:29Like, if I was out, I wouldn't want

0:20:29 > 0:20:31to talk to anybody, I'd just be...

0:20:31 > 0:20:33To the outside world, I was just really moody.

0:20:33 > 0:20:35I appear very confident when I'm out,

0:20:35 > 0:20:38and I appear to be very much the kind of...

0:20:38 > 0:20:40not life and soul person, but extremely present.

0:20:40 > 0:20:45I laugh a lot, and I avoid any social situation

0:20:45 > 0:20:47when I'm feeling depressed

0:20:47 > 0:20:50because I don't want that image of myself to be compromised.

0:20:50 > 0:20:52Back at the training camp,

0:20:52 > 0:20:54the other runners have been sharing their stories.

0:20:54 > 0:20:57It's been a long day, it's been good, meeting everyone.

0:20:57 > 0:21:00I think it's been far better than I imagined.

0:21:00 > 0:21:05I was really nervous but, actually, we've just gelled really quickly.

0:21:05 > 0:21:07It's been more emotional than I thought.

0:21:07 > 0:21:09I've had a few tears

0:21:09 > 0:21:11which is something I don't often do.

0:21:11 > 0:21:14Emotions have been running high all day.

0:21:15 > 0:21:18Shereece has been reflecting on her teenage depression...

0:21:21 > 0:21:24..and it's brought on a full-blown panic attack.

0:21:24 > 0:21:27SHE BREATHES DEEPLY

0:21:27 > 0:21:29Do you want me to lift you up?

0:21:29 > 0:21:31I think you just need some air...

0:21:36 > 0:21:42Chevy, who is trained to deal with situations like this, is called.

0:21:47 > 0:21:49Look at me. Look at me.

0:21:49 > 0:21:51Look at me. Dial into me, right?

0:21:51 > 0:21:54Look at me.

0:21:54 > 0:21:57Deep breaths. You can do this, all right?

0:21:57 > 0:21:59In through your nose.

0:21:59 > 0:22:00SHE INHALES

0:22:04 > 0:22:07Shall we go for a bit of a walk? Shall we get some fresh air?

0:22:07 > 0:22:08- OK.- Yeah?

0:22:09 > 0:22:12Come on, come and get some fresh air for two secs.

0:22:12 > 0:22:15- Come on.- Do you want an extra jacket?- Yes, please.- There you go.

0:22:16 > 0:22:18- Thank you.- Don't worry.

0:22:22 > 0:22:23OK.

0:22:28 > 0:22:30- VOICE BREAKING:- I was bullied quite a lot at school.

0:22:30 > 0:22:32Like...

0:22:32 > 0:22:35I think some of those girls would come to school for me, like...

0:22:35 > 0:22:39It wasn't for education, it was just to start on me again and, like...

0:22:39 > 0:22:41I didn't do anything about it because I was scared.

0:22:41 > 0:22:45And I really hope that I pass the finish line because if I do...

0:22:47 > 0:22:49If I do, it just...

0:22:49 > 0:22:52Do you know what? You don't need to think about the finish line yet.

0:22:52 > 0:22:55Your next step is coming tomorrow morning.

0:22:55 > 0:22:57- Yes.- Absolutely.

0:22:57 > 0:22:58Do you want a hug?

0:23:00 > 0:23:03You don't know what's going on in someone else's life.

0:23:03 > 0:23:06And you won't know until they tell you.

0:23:06 > 0:23:07And that's why we,

0:23:07 > 0:23:09as people that want to spread

0:23:09 > 0:23:12awareness of mental health problems,

0:23:12 > 0:23:14want to do this.

0:23:17 > 0:23:19Because I always felt that I didn't deserve

0:23:19 > 0:23:21to complain about my mental health

0:23:21 > 0:23:23and I didn't deserve to have a voice,

0:23:23 > 0:23:25but everyone deserves to have a voice

0:23:25 > 0:23:28and to speak out without judgment

0:23:28 > 0:23:30and without fear.

0:23:30 > 0:23:32And without feeling ashamed of how I feel.

0:23:48 > 0:23:51It's a very early start for everyone.

0:23:51 > 0:23:53- Right, off we go. - All right, we're rolling, people.

0:23:53 > 0:23:55Here we go.

0:23:55 > 0:23:57Just over there, round to the left, follow the line.

0:23:57 > 0:24:00And thankfully, after yesterday's emotionally charged day,

0:24:00 > 0:24:02we still have a full house.

0:24:02 > 0:24:04Nice and easy.

0:24:06 > 0:24:07It's beautiful.

0:24:09 > 0:24:11Almost worth getting out of bed at six.

0:24:11 > 0:24:13Right, round to the left. Nice and easy.

0:24:13 > 0:24:16It's very difficult to know whether in five months' time

0:24:16 > 0:24:17when they run the marathon,

0:24:17 > 0:24:20I'll be waving goodbye to the same number of people

0:24:20 > 0:24:21setting out on the marathon

0:24:21 > 0:24:24as we are seeing set off this morning. I hope so.

0:24:24 > 0:24:27Training for the London Marathon is tough,

0:24:27 > 0:24:29but whilst battling serious mental health problems,

0:24:29 > 0:24:31it's an epic challenge.

0:24:31 > 0:24:34Right then, you can turn around, pick your friend up, off you go.

0:24:36 > 0:24:39If they CAN embrace the exercise routine...

0:24:39 > 0:24:40Go on, Steve.

0:24:40 > 0:24:43..they could benefit from the release of endorphins,

0:24:43 > 0:24:44which could calm anxiety,

0:24:44 > 0:24:48lift depression and ultimately help them gain control of their minds

0:24:48 > 0:24:50as well as their bodies.

0:24:50 > 0:24:53I hope we can get them all to the start line.

0:24:53 > 0:24:55I hope we get them all to the finish.

0:24:55 > 0:24:58But we have to give them the space to be able to not do it

0:24:58 > 0:25:00without feeling like they are failing at the same time.

0:25:00 > 0:25:03It's that really tricky balance to meet.

0:25:04 > 0:25:07Encourage them to go for it and let them know that they CAN go for it,

0:25:07 > 0:25:10without making it a thing of failure

0:25:10 > 0:25:13if they don't get to the start line of the marathon.

0:25:13 > 0:25:16At the end of the day, we are a team.

0:25:16 > 0:25:19I really feel like that. It sounds really cheesy,

0:25:19 > 0:25:22and just sort of contrived after the first day to say that.

0:25:22 > 0:25:24But it does. That's what it feels like.

0:25:24 > 0:25:25Let's do it.

0:25:25 > 0:25:28Yeah, I really hope we can all pull together and finish the marathon.

0:25:28 > 0:25:31We can be ourselves, we can talk about things,

0:25:31 > 0:25:32and everyone understands,

0:25:32 > 0:25:36which, again, has really helped me the last couple of days.

0:25:36 > 0:25:39And already I can feel within 24 hours just that little bit of weight

0:25:39 > 0:25:41being lifted, so who knows?

0:25:41 > 0:25:45By April, you know, I'll be running marathons.

0:25:45 > 0:25:47- Eternal, baby.- Well done.

0:25:48 > 0:25:51THEY CHEER

0:25:53 > 0:25:55- Well done.- Thank you. - Really well done, people.

0:25:58 > 0:26:01The two days have gone better than we could have wished for.

0:26:01 > 0:26:04There's a real sense of optimism in the air.

0:26:05 > 0:26:07It's really, really exciting to see you lot all smiling

0:26:07 > 0:26:09and looking back at me the way you are at the moment.

0:26:09 > 0:26:11You're already different people

0:26:11 > 0:26:13from the people that I think walked in yesterday morning.

0:26:13 > 0:26:16The positivity has been really, really admirable

0:26:16 > 0:26:17and, actually, for me, quite exciting.

0:26:17 > 0:26:20To see you all actually bonding with each other,

0:26:20 > 0:26:22and being supportive of each other, and that's what it's got to be.

0:26:22 > 0:26:24It's got to be a team going forward.

0:26:24 > 0:26:26It's going to be tough. There's going to be great times,

0:26:26 > 0:26:29there's going to be low times, but you actually,

0:26:29 > 0:26:31with the help of the other people around you,

0:26:31 > 0:26:33hopefully, will be able to dig yourselves out of those low times.

0:26:33 > 0:26:36All of your coaches here are going to be available to you.

0:26:36 > 0:26:38You can contact them whenever you want.

0:26:38 > 0:26:40- You're there for them, right? - Our time is your time.

0:26:40 > 0:26:42We're in this with you. OK?

0:26:42 > 0:26:45- Yeah, definitely.- Good.- Ready to go back home and start running?

0:26:45 > 0:26:47Yeah! Cool.

0:26:51 > 0:26:53I know it's a big challenge, it's not easy,

0:26:53 > 0:26:55and I know it's going to get harder,

0:26:55 > 0:26:58but I've just got to get my mind around it,

0:26:58 > 0:27:00because I'm expecting it to get more difficult.

0:27:00 > 0:27:02When I go home, I'll be out.

0:27:02 > 0:27:05I'm already planning routes in my head,

0:27:05 > 0:27:08where to go, where the best places to run to, like,

0:27:08 > 0:27:10how far the nearest cafe is -

0:27:10 > 0:27:13so I can run as far as the cafe and have a coffee and then run home.

0:27:15 > 0:27:17Talk about getting up and flying away,

0:27:17 > 0:27:20actually, they're leaving here with a new enthusiasm, hopefully,

0:27:20 > 0:27:22and feeling more enthused about the process.

0:27:22 > 0:27:24All ten are still on board, which is no mean feat,

0:27:24 > 0:27:26and are going out there, apparently,

0:27:26 > 0:27:28determined to carry on with their training.

0:27:31 > 0:27:34It's my job to help spur them to the start line.

0:27:34 > 0:27:37I've come to Kensington Palace to find out from Prince William

0:27:37 > 0:27:41why he wants to encourage us all to talk about our mental health.

0:27:41 > 0:27:43Morning, Your Royal Highness.

0:27:43 > 0:27:44Heads Together, set up by the Royals,

0:27:44 > 0:27:47is the main charity for this year's London Marathon,

0:27:47 > 0:27:49and OUR runners will be part of their team.

0:27:49 > 0:27:52Royal support could be the extra encouragement they need.

0:27:52 > 0:27:55We have gathered together ten people

0:27:55 > 0:27:58who suffer very different mental health issues,

0:27:58 > 0:28:01and brought them together to try and use the marathon,

0:28:01 > 0:28:03which is obviously...

0:28:04 > 0:28:06..your key event this year, I suppose.

0:28:06 > 0:28:08And you're running it as well, Nick, which is great news.

0:28:08 > 0:28:10Well, yeah... It's interesting you should talk of that.

0:28:10 > 0:28:12I'm not running it, but the reason I'm not running it

0:28:12 > 0:28:15is not just because I don't want to do the training.

0:28:15 > 0:28:18I think, actually, the programme that we're making and going forward

0:28:18 > 0:28:19is not about me, it's about them.

0:28:19 > 0:28:23I want them to be the centre of it, and I'm going to keep arguing that!

0:28:23 > 0:28:25It's a battle I'm losing, at the moment.

0:28:25 > 0:28:29One in four people, they say now, suffer bad mental health.

0:28:29 > 0:28:31That's a huge chunk of your population.

0:28:31 > 0:28:32Is your interest

0:28:32 > 0:28:37looking forward towards the sort of life of duty and responsibility

0:28:37 > 0:28:39that obviously is in front of you,

0:28:39 > 0:28:41or as a parent of two young children

0:28:41 > 0:28:44who have a world to grow into?

0:28:44 > 0:28:47I think, from my personal point of view, it's the emotional side.

0:28:47 > 0:28:50I hate seeing people in an emotional or mental torment.

0:28:50 > 0:28:52You know, you can really see it sometimes, and it's really sad,

0:28:52 > 0:28:55because it takes you down a very, very different path in life.

0:28:55 > 0:28:57The whole point of the campaign, with the marathon,

0:28:57 > 0:29:00I think, we really just want to reduce the stigma.

0:29:00 > 0:29:03We want people to talk about mental health like it's perfectly normal.

0:29:03 > 0:29:05Is it something that you have to control or look at?

0:29:05 > 0:29:08I mean, you've got a lot ahead of you, a lot of responsibility,

0:29:08 > 0:29:10and the whole world... You know, people with paranoia

0:29:10 > 0:29:13- think the whole world's watching them and judging them.- Yeah.

0:29:14 > 0:29:16Yeah, I can see where that links in.

0:29:16 > 0:29:18But, no, I mean I'm very lucky,

0:29:18 > 0:29:20I've got a good support network around me.

0:29:20 > 0:29:22For those who don't have that network,

0:29:22 > 0:29:24that's where the first cracks start to appear.

0:29:24 > 0:29:29And it must be incredibly isolating, and it's really, really - I find -

0:29:29 > 0:29:33very sad and a very depressing state, that we're in this condition.

0:29:33 > 0:29:35- It should be easily changed. - It should be, absolutely.

0:29:35 > 0:29:38Would you consider coming and joining in?

0:29:38 > 0:29:40- What, doing the marathon?- Well...

0:29:40 > 0:29:42No, I was suggesting just a short training run.

0:29:42 > 0:29:45- Definitely.- And actually come and meet the guys...- Yeah.

0:29:45 > 0:29:47- ..and have a bit of a run with them. - I'd love to.

0:29:47 > 0:29:49I think that would help them enormously.

0:29:49 > 0:29:51- Excellent, see you in shorts. - That's a thought, isn't it?!

0:29:51 > 0:29:54- Thank you very much.- Really good to see you again, thanks.

0:29:55 > 0:29:57I mean, he's going to be king one day

0:29:57 > 0:29:58and you can see why he's engaged

0:29:58 > 0:30:01and see why it's so important that we start talking about it

0:30:01 > 0:30:04and why those who don't suffer mental health issues

0:30:04 > 0:30:06need to understand how it works,

0:30:06 > 0:30:08so that we can identify it and we can help those that do.

0:30:09 > 0:30:12To break the runners into the marathon training schedule,

0:30:12 > 0:30:15Chevy has devised specific exercise plans.

0:30:15 > 0:30:19For the more experienced, like Sam, he's targeting bad habits.

0:30:19 > 0:30:22Bend the knees, pull. Good. Pull, good.

0:30:22 > 0:30:23I've been running for years,

0:30:23 > 0:30:25but I've never really paid much attention to my technique,

0:30:25 > 0:30:29so it's just completely rewiring how I think about everything.

0:30:29 > 0:30:31And up.

0:30:31 > 0:30:32For Jake, who's used to hiking,

0:30:32 > 0:30:34it's a matter of retraining key muscles.

0:30:34 > 0:30:37We squat well, we'll run well.

0:30:37 > 0:30:40Look at me, come on, focus, right? Focus, focus, get your breath.

0:30:40 > 0:30:44And for Shereece, who's prone to panic attacks...

0:30:44 > 0:30:45You're all right, you're all right.

0:30:45 > 0:30:48..the first hurdle is becoming master of her breath.

0:30:48 > 0:30:50OK.

0:30:50 > 0:30:52It's psychological, and we have to get past that.

0:30:52 > 0:30:56It's more in the mind than it is her lungs not being able to deal

0:30:56 > 0:30:58with what I'm kind of presenting her with.

0:30:58 > 0:31:01At the moment we're just learning, and that's what this is about.

0:31:01 > 0:31:02How are they adapting to training,

0:31:02 > 0:31:04and what do we need to do to support them?

0:31:04 > 0:31:06So, I want you to try and spend as much of your day

0:31:06 > 0:31:07down in the squat position as possible.

0:31:07 > 0:31:10Sit down, sit down, sit lower, you've got it in you.

0:31:10 > 0:31:11Come on, that's it, good.

0:31:11 > 0:31:12Up you get.

0:31:14 > 0:31:15- Hang out with him.- High-five!

0:31:15 > 0:31:17I'm not going to lie to myself,

0:31:17 > 0:31:19I'm finding it a little bit difficult at the moment.

0:31:21 > 0:31:23My body's like in shock, like, "Oh, God, what are you doing to me?!"

0:31:23 > 0:31:26So I need to keep doing it, so my body can get used to it,

0:31:26 > 0:31:27and then it can feel easy.

0:31:27 > 0:31:29I don't know if my mind power will take me there,

0:31:29 > 0:31:31but right now I know that I need to do a lot more.

0:31:42 > 0:31:43That was really hard.

0:31:43 > 0:31:46- Tight core.- Yeah.

0:31:46 > 0:31:48And back up again.

0:31:51 > 0:31:52I feel like I'm going to be sick.

0:31:52 > 0:31:54Stay up, upright, stay upright.

0:31:54 > 0:31:57Get air in your lungs, air in your lungs, air in your lungs.

0:31:57 > 0:31:58Good.

0:31:58 > 0:32:03There's one runner I'm particularly concerned about - Rhian.

0:32:03 > 0:32:06Her anxiety is so strong, she can't go running on her own,

0:32:06 > 0:32:10and this could make it difficult for her to train enough.

0:32:10 > 0:32:15Rhian plainly has the ability to present a calm and controlled face

0:32:15 > 0:32:17to the world.

0:32:17 > 0:32:20I imagine you have to in order to get by.

0:32:23 > 0:32:27And you wouldn't know the trauma she's been through.

0:32:27 > 0:32:28And it...

0:32:28 > 0:32:33I don't know how she's come through to this point.

0:32:33 > 0:32:35It's every parent's worst nightmare,

0:32:35 > 0:32:39and then to actually have the loss of your partner,

0:32:39 > 0:32:42whilst you're trying to deal with the ultimate loss as a parent,

0:32:42 > 0:32:45I can't imagine that there's many people in the country

0:32:45 > 0:32:47that have suffered the double loss she has.

0:32:51 > 0:32:52- Hello!- Hello, you.

0:32:52 > 0:32:54- How are you?- I'm good, how are you?

0:32:54 > 0:32:57- Lovely to see you.- Lovely to see you, welcome to Wales.

0:32:57 > 0:33:00I was just looking at your lovely countryside right outside your door.

0:33:00 > 0:33:02- I know, it is lovely. - You in your running kit?- Yeah.

0:33:02 > 0:33:06- Are you going out? - Well, do you fancy it?

0:33:07 > 0:33:09- It won't go far.- You don't like going running on your own, do you?

0:33:09 > 0:33:11- No, no.- Have you got anyone to go with?

0:33:11 > 0:33:13No, not today.

0:33:13 > 0:33:15Come on, no pressure.

0:33:15 > 0:33:18Only a little one, and it's beautiful, it's not raining.

0:33:18 > 0:33:20All right, I'll get my stuff out the car,

0:33:20 > 0:33:22as long as you don't tell anybody else, I'll go and get my stuff.

0:33:22 > 0:33:25- I'll be back in two seconds. - Cool, OK, brill.- Unbelievable!

0:33:29 > 0:33:31Are we going a lot slower for my benefit?

0:33:31 > 0:33:33No, gosh, I wouldn't go much faster than this.

0:33:33 > 0:33:36- This is about the right speed for you, is it?- Yeah, no, I'm not fast.

0:33:36 > 0:33:37I'm absolutely loving it, though.

0:33:37 > 0:33:39I've really started getting a bit of a bug.

0:33:39 > 0:33:42- Really, really, are you getting into it?- Yeah, I am, yeah.

0:33:42 > 0:33:45I'm not surprised when you... Look at it, it's beautiful.

0:33:45 > 0:33:48- I know, it is.- What a great place to enjoy running.- Exactly.

0:33:48 > 0:33:51- Do you think it's helping with your mental health?- Oh, massive.

0:33:51 > 0:33:52The last few months,

0:33:52 > 0:33:54I've had to start looking at myself a little bit

0:33:54 > 0:33:56and I'm just finding that the running

0:33:56 > 0:33:59is giving me a little bit of confidence and self-esteem

0:33:59 > 0:34:02- as well, and improved that.- OK.

0:34:04 > 0:34:06I was not expecting this, and I have to tell you...

0:34:07 > 0:34:10..I would not have had Parmesan cheese for lunch...

0:34:11 > 0:34:14- ..if I'd have known. - Well done.- Thank you.

0:34:14 > 0:34:16That's been a very long time since I've done that.

0:34:16 > 0:34:18Can I get a glass of water, please? THEY LAUGH

0:34:20 > 0:34:22Running seems to be helping Rhian,

0:34:22 > 0:34:25but I'm wondering how her loss has been affecting her

0:34:25 > 0:34:27for the last five years.

0:34:27 > 0:34:30- Can I talk to you about things or not? Because it's up to you.- Yeah.

0:34:30 > 0:34:33The last few months, I've done a lot of talking about it,

0:34:33 > 0:34:36but bad things happened to me.

0:34:37 > 0:34:41And I can't let anything else bad happen to me.

0:34:41 > 0:34:45You know... And I feel, I bring it on myself.

0:34:45 > 0:34:47It's not for me to really say,

0:34:47 > 0:34:51but how can you possibly have brought on yourself what happened?

0:34:53 > 0:34:54I think as a mum...

0:34:56 > 0:34:59..when your child dies in front of you, with no warning...

0:35:00 > 0:35:02..I should have known. I should have known he was ill.

0:35:02 > 0:35:04I should have taken him to the doctors,

0:35:04 > 0:35:07I should have seen that there were symptoms, and I didn't.

0:35:07 > 0:35:10And one minute he was crawling, and the next minute he was dead.

0:35:10 > 0:35:12Has anyone said to you that it would have been possible

0:35:12 > 0:35:14for you to have known?

0:35:14 > 0:35:16No, they say the opposite.

0:35:16 > 0:35:17But it doesn't matter.

0:35:17 > 0:35:20It doesn't matter how many times you say that to me.

0:35:20 > 0:35:21I'm the same with my husband.

0:35:21 > 0:35:24You know, he was here one minute,

0:35:24 > 0:35:26the next minute he walked out and he never came home.

0:35:26 > 0:35:29You know, and he died five days after my little boy.

0:35:30 > 0:35:32He couldn't cope with what had happened, and...

0:35:33 > 0:35:35..I wasn't there for him.

0:35:35 > 0:35:38You know, I didn't see any reason that he wouldn't come home,

0:35:38 > 0:35:40and I should have known.

0:35:40 > 0:35:41And I should have been there for him,

0:35:41 > 0:35:43and I should have been there for George,

0:35:43 > 0:35:44because that's actually how I feel.

0:35:44 > 0:35:47- Still?- Yeah.

0:35:47 > 0:35:50Until, literally, the last couple of months.

0:35:50 > 0:35:53And what's changed in the last couple of months?

0:35:55 > 0:35:59Facing it. The last few months I've faced what's happened,

0:35:59 > 0:36:03started running, you know, getting a routine...

0:36:04 > 0:36:07..eating better, cutting out the alcohol

0:36:07 > 0:36:11and just changing my whole way that I see life

0:36:11 > 0:36:13has really made a difference.

0:36:14 > 0:36:17I still feel very worthless and useless.

0:36:18 > 0:36:20I don't think I could have done what you've done.

0:36:20 > 0:36:23I swear to God, I couldn't have done what you've done.

0:36:23 > 0:36:25I just don't...

0:36:25 > 0:36:27Children die, sadly, and there's nothing you can do,

0:36:27 > 0:36:31and my little boy was taken, and I'll never understand why.

0:36:32 > 0:36:36My husband should be here today, he should be here with me,

0:36:36 > 0:36:38and he should be there for my kids.

0:36:38 > 0:36:40I know, but it wasn't your fault.

0:36:41 > 0:36:43You have no idea how...

0:36:45 > 0:36:49..how amazing I think you are and other people think you are,

0:36:49 > 0:36:53just for surviving the last couple of years.

0:36:54 > 0:36:57It's extraordinary that you kept going.

0:36:57 > 0:37:00It's extraordinary that you manage on a day-to-day basis.

0:37:00 > 0:37:04Even more extraordinary that you took on this challenge as well,

0:37:04 > 0:37:08that you're considering opening up and talking to people.

0:37:08 > 0:37:11These are all extraordinary things.

0:37:11 > 0:37:13Your experiences are never going to go away.

0:37:13 > 0:37:15You're never going to not have had the loss you've had.

0:37:15 > 0:37:18I don't want them to go away, in a way, sometimes. I want to remember.

0:37:18 > 0:37:19And I still want...

0:37:21 > 0:37:24But I just don't want it to eat me away and I do want to look forward.

0:37:24 > 0:37:27I do want a life in front of me.

0:37:27 > 0:37:29And the running... When you're running,

0:37:29 > 0:37:32you feel sometimes you're running towards a good new life.

0:37:32 > 0:37:33It sounds a bit corny.

0:37:33 > 0:37:35And you're leaving everything behind you,

0:37:35 > 0:37:38and that's how I see, now, 2017 being.

0:37:38 > 0:37:39I want it to be that -

0:37:39 > 0:37:43the transition between then and now, and the future, really.

0:37:43 > 0:37:48I'm honestly confused, or I'm in a quandary,

0:37:48 > 0:37:53how you convey to someone like Rhian that she is truly an amazing person.

0:37:55 > 0:37:56She's intelligent.

0:37:56 > 0:37:59She understands, she knows why she should think differently,

0:37:59 > 0:38:00but she doesn't.

0:38:01 > 0:38:03And it's just...

0:38:06 > 0:38:09..heartbreaking, truly heartbreaking.

0:38:13 > 0:38:14It's a new year

0:38:14 > 0:38:17and to keep on schedule for the 2017 London Marathon,

0:38:17 > 0:38:20the runners need to hit various milestones.

0:38:21 > 0:38:23So why are we here and what are we running?

0:38:23 > 0:38:26I say we, I'm still not joining in, by the way.

0:38:26 > 0:38:28- Not convinced yet? - I haven't got the footwear.

0:38:28 > 0:38:30I couldn't find the right footwear, that was the thing.

0:38:30 > 0:38:34Today we're going to do a cheeky little 6K along the front,

0:38:34 > 0:38:35get them moving again and say,

0:38:35 > 0:38:38right, Christmas is there, we're all feeling a little bit tired,

0:38:38 > 0:38:40but do you know what? We're in it now.

0:38:40 > 0:38:43- How was your running over Christmas? - It didn't happen.

0:38:44 > 0:38:47- Speaking for you... - Yeah, he's been out.

0:38:47 > 0:38:50We've invited all ten runners.

0:38:50 > 0:38:52Five have made it.

0:38:52 > 0:38:55Does anyone else feel strange that there's only half of us here?

0:38:55 > 0:38:57- Yeah.- It's not a bad turnout.

0:38:57 > 0:39:01- It's all right. All the best ones are here.- Yes!

0:39:01 > 0:39:04Jake recently moved back to Brighton after spending the last six months

0:39:04 > 0:39:06living at home with his mum,

0:39:06 > 0:39:08following a severe bout of depression.

0:39:08 > 0:39:10Feels like there's too much water in there.

0:39:10 > 0:39:12It's like nearly porridge, isn't it?

0:39:14 > 0:39:18Jake's very funny and he loves people

0:39:18 > 0:39:23and he's usually very comfortable in his own skin, very sociable.

0:39:23 > 0:39:28But the time that I knew that he really wasn't well was when he was

0:39:28 > 0:39:34telling me he was getting anxious socially and he was starting to say,

0:39:34 > 0:39:36I think it was really hard for him to say it,

0:39:36 > 0:39:41but he was saying that he didn't feel safe, which really worried me.

0:39:41 > 0:39:45So he just said, "I think I need to come home.

0:39:45 > 0:39:47"Is it all right if I come home?"

0:39:48 > 0:39:51Which of course it is. You never say no to a child

0:39:51 > 0:39:54if they want to come home, no matter how big and old and ugly they are.

0:39:58 > 0:40:02- So how are you doing now? Are you managing?- I'm all right.

0:40:02 > 0:40:03Yeah, I'm doing all right.

0:40:03 > 0:40:05Coming back to Brighton has obviously brought up

0:40:05 > 0:40:07a few things for me because I felt really anxious

0:40:07 > 0:40:10that everyone knew all the stuff that I'd been going through

0:40:10 > 0:40:11when I was here before.

0:40:11 > 0:40:14But then I felt better because no-one was any different with me.

0:40:14 > 0:40:15That was really reassuring.

0:40:17 > 0:40:18Yeah, I feel all right.

0:40:18 > 0:40:21I don't feel as great as I did when I was on the walk. I felt...

0:40:21 > 0:40:24I was just relentlessly happy when I was doing that walk

0:40:24 > 0:40:27and it was because I had purpose, and it was sunny,

0:40:27 > 0:40:29and I had the exercise, and I had all that.

0:40:29 > 0:40:32And I'm back into work now, which is nice as well, I suppose.

0:40:32 > 0:40:35I kind of feel like...

0:40:35 > 0:40:37Are you saying you're happy

0:40:37 > 0:40:39when you're actually in flux at the moment?

0:40:39 > 0:40:40I am a little bit in flux, yeah.

0:40:40 > 0:40:42I mean...

0:40:43 > 0:40:45Yeah, I suppose I am.

0:40:45 > 0:40:48I'm not at the moment, but I feel like it's in the mail, you know?

0:40:48 > 0:40:51I feel like at some point in the near future

0:40:51 > 0:40:54I will have a shit day or a shit week.

0:40:54 > 0:40:58I can feel it coming, and I think it's because...

0:40:58 > 0:41:00Well, I don't know why it is, really.

0:41:00 > 0:41:03And do you think you have the coping mechanisms now to deal with it

0:41:03 > 0:41:06- when that day turns up or are you wary of it?- I think so.

0:41:07 > 0:41:09- A bit of both.- Yeah.

0:41:10 > 0:41:12The thing with depression is, like, logic,

0:41:12 > 0:41:14you can't apply logic to anything.

0:41:14 > 0:41:16You can tell yourself that it's just a depression.

0:41:16 > 0:41:18You can tell yourself, "It's because of this."

0:41:18 > 0:41:21You can work it all out to the nth

0:41:21 > 0:41:24and you still feel like shit, so it's like...

0:41:24 > 0:41:26I accept that it's part of me now

0:41:26 > 0:41:29and that's going to make it easier for me to deal with.

0:41:29 > 0:41:31I think, whenever I do start feeling like crap,

0:41:31 > 0:41:33all I've got to do is get in touch with this lot.

0:41:33 > 0:41:36Everyone's been on it straightaway. Just like, "Anything we can do.

0:41:36 > 0:41:38"We're all here for you. We all love you."

0:41:38 > 0:41:41It's genuine. It's really nice that it's genuine.

0:41:41 > 0:41:43And I really feel that. I think we all feel that.

0:41:46 > 0:41:49Every now and again somebody says something to you that you go,

0:41:49 > 0:41:51"I really understand that."

0:41:51 > 0:41:52Today, when Jake said,

0:41:52 > 0:41:53"I don't feel depressed today

0:41:53 > 0:41:56"but I feel like it's in the mail on its way to me."

0:41:57 > 0:41:59I understand that. I understand what he means.

0:41:59 > 0:42:04That gives me an insight into how he feels and how people feel

0:42:04 > 0:42:05if they're suffering depression.

0:42:05 > 0:42:08It's like a cloud on the horizon that's coming your way.

0:42:08 > 0:42:09You just don't know when it's going to hit.

0:42:12 > 0:42:15As we go, what we're trying to do is discover our pace.

0:42:15 > 0:42:19I wondered whether I had enough knowledge

0:42:19 > 0:42:23to talk to these people about the difficulties they face.

0:42:23 > 0:42:27Whereas it becomes clearer and clearer to me that...

0:42:27 > 0:42:28just listening is the key.

0:42:28 > 0:42:31Keep going. All you've got to do is stay on my shoulder.

0:42:31 > 0:42:32That's the way forward -

0:42:32 > 0:42:38if you can learn to listen and encourage people to talk

0:42:38 > 0:42:42and not be judgmental, and not go in with preconceptions,

0:42:42 > 0:42:44you'll be able to help your loved ones a lot more.

0:42:46 > 0:42:48I've got a shooting pain in my calf at the moment.

0:42:49 > 0:42:52But we're walking and it feels good walking.

0:42:53 > 0:42:55I have had a bit of a cry...

0:42:56 > 0:42:58..cos I feel like a failure.

0:42:59 > 0:43:02- Which we've discussed?- Which we've discussed. I'm not, cos I'm here.

0:43:04 > 0:43:06Almost there, people, we are almost done.

0:43:06 > 0:43:09Here we go. Here they come.

0:43:13 > 0:43:14That's us. Here we are.

0:43:16 > 0:43:19- Nice one.- Nice one, man. - Well done. Lovely.

0:43:19 > 0:43:22Good. How does that feel?

0:43:22 > 0:43:26You're all looking incredibly fresh and happy and smiley.

0:43:26 > 0:43:27You guys are really good. I'm really happy.

0:43:27 > 0:43:29I run with a lot of people.

0:43:29 > 0:43:31I've run with a lot of people over the last ten years

0:43:31 > 0:43:33and for people who are just starting out on your journey,

0:43:33 > 0:43:34it was good.

0:43:38 > 0:43:40Good. Well done.

0:43:42 > 0:43:45Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

0:43:47 > 0:43:49Mel has picked up a minor injury,

0:43:49 > 0:43:52but she's completed the six-kilometre landmark

0:43:52 > 0:43:55that all the runners need to achieve at this stage.

0:43:55 > 0:43:59But I am concerned about the others who haven't made it today.

0:43:59 > 0:44:02Shereece has been feeling low,

0:44:02 > 0:44:05and I'm keen to find out if there's anything we can do to help.

0:44:07 > 0:44:09How are you doing?

0:44:09 > 0:44:13I'm all right. I'm just a bit deflated because I'm not well.

0:44:13 > 0:44:15And I want to cancel a lot of things.

0:44:15 > 0:44:18I didn't even want to run. I haven't even checked my e-mails.

0:44:18 > 0:44:23I haven't checked anything. I just needed to kind of live under a rock.

0:44:23 > 0:44:25If one thing has not gone right or if I feel this way...

0:44:27 > 0:44:32..I guess I tend to just let it just ruin everything else.

0:44:32 > 0:44:34- But... - Can we get...?

0:44:34 > 0:44:37Obviously, we have a psychologist that's attached to the programme.

0:44:37 > 0:44:39Can we get him to have a chat with you? Would that help?

0:44:39 > 0:44:41Or would you find that, again, too much pressure?

0:44:42 > 0:44:47I feel a bit disappointed that I couldn't cheer up myself by myself.

0:44:47 > 0:44:49- Kind of thing.- That's a lot of pressure to put on yourself, though.

0:44:49 > 0:44:51Yeah, I just feel like...

0:44:51 > 0:44:55Am I going down in that circle again if I ask somebody for help?

0:44:55 > 0:44:58Getting help from people is not a weakness.

0:44:59 > 0:45:06If you were running now and you developed a tight calf muscle

0:45:06 > 0:45:08you'd go and see a masseur who would massage it out

0:45:08 > 0:45:11and get it moving again, so that it could repair and you carry on.

0:45:11 > 0:45:14- Yes.- So at the moment you're in a situation

0:45:14 > 0:45:15where you're not feeling great

0:45:15 > 0:45:20and so you talk to somebody who knows how to help you with that

0:45:20 > 0:45:22until you're feeling good again and then you don't need it.

0:45:22 > 0:45:25It's only like a massage, it's just a massage for your head, isn't it?

0:45:25 > 0:45:28I just want to give you the best opportunity

0:45:28 > 0:45:30to find a way through this.

0:45:30 > 0:45:32If you promise not to see it as failure,

0:45:32 > 0:45:34I'll get somebody to come and have a chat

0:45:34 > 0:45:36- and see if we can sort something out.- Yeah.

0:45:38 > 0:45:40SHE SIGHS

0:45:41 > 0:45:45- OK.- You'll get there. You'll be all right.

0:45:45 > 0:45:47She's got so much on her plate at the moment.

0:45:47 > 0:45:50Really, really tough. She's felt ill and then she's not sleeping.

0:45:50 > 0:45:53And then she's got the pressure of looking after the children.

0:45:53 > 0:45:56She's worried about letting people down.

0:45:56 > 0:45:59And it's amazing that she still thinks it's letting herself down

0:45:59 > 0:46:01if she can't deal with it herself.

0:46:01 > 0:46:04Still doesn't want to ask someone for help,

0:46:04 > 0:46:06someone professional for help.

0:46:06 > 0:46:08You've got to change that for everybody.

0:46:08 > 0:46:09Somehow we've got to make it OK,

0:46:09 > 0:46:12rather than feeling that you've let yourself down

0:46:12 > 0:46:14because you've asked for help.

0:46:17 > 0:46:19On top of battling their mental health problems,

0:46:19 > 0:46:21training must keep to schedule

0:46:21 > 0:46:24to have any chance of completing the London Marathon.

0:46:24 > 0:46:27It's not for playing. Get off it!

0:46:27 > 0:46:30As they head towards the next milestone, the 10K,

0:46:30 > 0:46:33some of the runners are already seeing the benefits.

0:46:33 > 0:46:35- Faster now, isn't it?- There you go!

0:46:35 > 0:46:37Keep going, keep going.

0:46:37 > 0:46:39You're doing really well, really well.

0:46:39 > 0:46:42And Rhian has achieved a huge personal victory,

0:46:42 > 0:46:47overcoming her anxiety enough to start to run on her own.

0:46:47 > 0:46:49I did it. I absolutely loved it.

0:46:49 > 0:46:52Lots of thinking time. I listened to my music.

0:46:54 > 0:46:57A few little threats. Every dog I saw, I thought was going to bite me.

0:46:57 > 0:47:00Every man and lady in a mac was going to stab me.

0:47:00 > 0:47:03But I did it. I'm just so chuffed.

0:47:03 > 0:47:06I'm quite knackered cos I ran so fast through the woods

0:47:06 > 0:47:08in case someone came out and attacked me, but all is good.

0:47:08 > 0:47:11That's good. Pull the heels up. Heels, heels, heels.

0:47:11 > 0:47:14Chevy is keeping a close eye on all the runners.

0:47:14 > 0:47:17- He's like this every day, you know. - Right, go, band, hip opener

0:47:17 > 0:47:20But for the last week, Jake has been avoiding his calls.

0:47:24 > 0:47:26Yeah, I'm not running today.

0:47:32 > 0:47:35I'm feeling a little bit vulnerable and I'm feeling...

0:47:38 > 0:47:41..feeling guilty about nothing.

0:47:43 > 0:47:46And mostly just feeling absolutely nothing.

0:47:46 > 0:47:51Just feeling completely hollow and just like a vessel.

0:47:54 > 0:47:59People assume that depression is all about being sad but it's not.

0:48:00 > 0:48:04It's frustrating because it feels like it's a waste of time

0:48:04 > 0:48:06to feel like this.

0:48:06 > 0:48:09It feels like, "What is the point?"

0:48:14 > 0:48:17Can we stop? I can't be arsed to talk about this any more.

0:48:21 > 0:48:25We're two months into training and the 10K is just around the corner.

0:48:25 > 0:48:29But for one runner the marathon regime is proving too much.

0:48:29 > 0:48:31Beset by injury and battling his anxiety,

0:48:31 > 0:48:35Steve has decided the marathon isn't for him.

0:48:35 > 0:48:38But he's keen to build on the progress he's made.

0:48:38 > 0:48:40How are you feeling about the fact

0:48:40 > 0:48:44that you're not going to be lining up to run the London Marathon now?

0:48:44 > 0:48:48- If I'm seriously honest?- Yes. - A little bit of relief.

0:48:48 > 0:48:50- Yes.- Because I didn't have to go

0:48:50 > 0:48:52and deal with the massive crowds of people

0:48:52 > 0:48:54stood at the starting line, while I am.

0:48:55 > 0:48:57Cos, obviously, that's a big issue.

0:48:57 > 0:49:02How much physical versus mental do you think it's been?

0:49:06 > 0:49:07I don't know.

0:49:07 > 0:49:10I really find it difficult sometimes to put it into words

0:49:10 > 0:49:14how much things affect me and how much things hurt...

0:49:16 > 0:49:18..without getting myself upset...

0:49:19 > 0:49:22..because I do. Sorry, I need a minute.

0:49:22 > 0:49:24It's all right. Have a minute.

0:49:24 > 0:49:26And one thing that really rings for me

0:49:26 > 0:49:28is I remember seeing you at training camp one,

0:49:28 > 0:49:30- but you did it, right?- Yeah.

0:49:30 > 0:49:33That's showing that you have the mental strength

0:49:33 > 0:49:35to overcome a mental barrier.

0:49:35 > 0:49:42Yeah. I am making small steps to deal with stuff and change things.

0:49:42 > 0:49:45It's getting you to explore things in different ways.

0:49:45 > 0:49:48So, for example, walking for you and getting some fresh air, I think,

0:49:48 > 0:49:52- is the first point of call. - Yes.- Reach out to a walking group.

0:49:52 > 0:49:53- Yeah.- Just do it, Steve.

0:49:53 > 0:49:56In order to get on and get myself back to where I should be,

0:49:56 > 0:49:59I've got to take things...

0:49:59 > 0:50:01new challenges, and do them,

0:50:01 > 0:50:03otherwise I'm never going to get anywhere.

0:50:03 > 0:50:05So it's more for me than anything.

0:50:05 > 0:50:07You know, I've got to really do it.

0:50:10 > 0:50:13Cheers. Thanks for coming down today. I appreciate it.

0:50:13 > 0:50:16We'll keep in touch with Steve and check on his progress.

0:50:17 > 0:50:21For the remaining runners, there's the task of completing 10km.

0:50:21 > 0:50:23It's a walk in the park for Sam and George.

0:50:23 > 0:50:27But for the rest of them, it's a daunting challenge.

0:50:27 > 0:50:29I just want to get it over and done with, really.

0:50:29 > 0:50:31I'm not thinking about how long it's going to take me.

0:50:31 > 0:50:33It's just about getting that distance done.

0:50:33 > 0:50:36Quarter of a marathon, I will feel epic.

0:50:36 > 0:50:38And it will be my personal best.

0:50:39 > 0:50:44The collective will to succeed has encouraged Shereece and Jake

0:50:44 > 0:50:46to get back on track.

0:50:46 > 0:50:49Yes, it's nice to be involved in a sporting event.

0:50:49 > 0:50:50A little taste of what's to come.

0:50:53 > 0:50:55Just nine weeks ago,

0:50:55 > 0:50:58conquering 10km seemed like an impossible undertaking

0:50:58 > 0:51:01but commitment, drive and determination

0:51:01 > 0:51:03have seen them through.

0:51:06 > 0:51:08Have a bit of that.

0:51:12 > 0:51:14Oh, my God.

0:51:14 > 0:51:17Yeah. Yeah.

0:51:21 > 0:51:24- Well done.- I've got a warm glow inside me.

0:51:24 > 0:51:27It's like a natural high, as they say in this running lark.

0:51:27 > 0:51:29The endorphins are kicking in.

0:51:29 > 0:51:33- It's the first medal I've ever won, actually.- I know, me too. Yay!

0:51:33 > 0:51:37- I'm so proud.- Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I feel like I really worked for that.

0:51:37 > 0:51:40A couple of weeks ago I saw myself failing this 10K

0:51:40 > 0:51:43and everyone else doing it, and I actually did mine.

0:51:43 > 0:51:45I did mine. I did mine.

0:51:47 > 0:51:48I did mine. I did mine.

0:51:53 > 0:51:56- SHE SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY - Group hug, group hug.

0:51:58 > 0:52:00It's an amazing achievement for them all.

0:52:03 > 0:52:06But for Rhian, there's an even greater challenge ahead.

0:52:07 > 0:52:11She's attempting a mammoth run in aid of the charity she set up

0:52:11 > 0:52:14to help suddenly bereaved families.

0:52:14 > 0:52:17And to mark the fifth anniversary of her little boy's death.

0:52:19 > 0:52:21George fell seriously ill here in Llantrisant

0:52:21 > 0:52:24and an ambulance was sent from Cardiff

0:52:24 > 0:52:26to get him for specialised care,

0:52:26 > 0:52:28but sadly the ambulance didn't arrive in time.

0:52:28 > 0:52:31So today I'm going to make the journey that he never made

0:52:31 > 0:52:34in memory of him to raise awareness of our charity

0:52:34 > 0:52:39but also to show that life goes on and everyone has to live with hope.

0:52:41 > 0:52:43- Hi!- Hello.

0:52:43 > 0:52:47Four of the other runners and Chevy have come to show their support.

0:52:47 > 0:52:50Thank you all so, so much for being here today.

0:52:50 > 0:52:53It means the world to me and my family

0:52:53 > 0:52:56to remember George on this special day.

0:52:56 > 0:52:58There's not going to be any tears. This is about hope.

0:52:58 > 0:53:00And I just want to thank you all, from the bottom of my heart,

0:53:00 > 0:53:01for being here. Thank you.

0:53:01 > 0:53:03We're going to go out into the car park

0:53:03 > 0:53:05and do a few minutes warm up with Chevy.

0:53:05 > 0:53:07And then we're off, OK?

0:53:21 > 0:53:23When George died, we received...

0:53:23 > 0:53:26Well, no support whatsoever from anyone professional.

0:53:28 > 0:53:31How can you have a child die

0:53:31 > 0:53:34and no-one come and check that you're OK?

0:53:34 > 0:53:37And, actually, even after Paul died just those few days later,

0:53:37 > 0:53:40as a family we were just left and completely abandoned.

0:53:40 > 0:53:44It's those things that have sort of built up inside me

0:53:44 > 0:53:46and made me feel that I didn't matter.

0:53:47 > 0:53:49Head up, head up, head up, eyes at the top.

0:53:51 > 0:53:54And I've always said that, sadly, children do fall ill,

0:53:54 > 0:53:57and do pass away, and you never want it to be your child.

0:53:59 > 0:54:03But a daddy should not walk out and never come home four days after.

0:54:03 > 0:54:06Rhian's strength, unbelievable.

0:54:06 > 0:54:09She's running with heart, running with purpose.

0:54:09 > 0:54:12This is it, right? This is the power of movement.

0:54:14 > 0:54:17- It's why I do what I do. - You're doing amazing, Poppy.

0:54:18 > 0:54:21Rhian's children, Isaac and Holly,

0:54:21 > 0:54:24are standing by to run the final leg.

0:54:24 > 0:54:28We're going to be running one mile to the Cardiff hospital.

0:54:29 > 0:54:31The good thing is, it's not too far.

0:54:31 > 0:54:35Yeah. It's a mile, Holly, so, a bit far.

0:54:39 > 0:54:40They're in sight!

0:54:41 > 0:54:45They're here for you, sunshine. Come on, head up, head up, come on.

0:54:47 > 0:54:48Come on.

0:54:58 > 0:55:00At the hospital, friends and supporters

0:55:00 > 0:55:04are waiting to welcome Rhian, including her mum and dad.

0:55:04 > 0:55:08To see all these people running for Rhian as well,

0:55:08 > 0:55:10and to see her running in...

0:55:11 > 0:55:12- ..on her own...- Yeah.

0:55:13 > 0:55:19- ..with the reason behind it, why she's running on her own.- Yeah.

0:55:19 > 0:55:21You know, it is very emotional.

0:55:21 > 0:55:25We're so proud, we're so proud of her, the children.

0:55:26 > 0:55:28Let's go. Head up.

0:55:28 > 0:55:30Own this, yeah?

0:55:35 > 0:55:37Yeah, well done!

0:55:37 > 0:55:39You're there, you're there.

0:55:42 > 0:55:46- Come on, Rhian. - Yes!- Well done, well done.

0:55:48 > 0:55:52Rhian has completed a mammoth 17 miles.

0:55:52 > 0:55:55Where's my mum? I did it.

0:55:58 > 0:56:00- It's a long way. - I got you chocolate!

0:56:03 > 0:56:06What we said about, there's a couple of people in this process

0:56:06 > 0:56:08where it's more of a healing process.

0:56:08 > 0:56:10Erm, and we're definitely seeing that within Rhian,

0:56:10 > 0:56:12and her strength just keeps shining through

0:56:12 > 0:56:13and she's winning at the moment.

0:56:19 > 0:56:21That was honestly one of the hardest things I've ever done.

0:56:21 > 0:56:23Erm, the last bit, coming through the hospital was hard,

0:56:23 > 0:56:25but I did it, you know?

0:56:25 > 0:56:27It's good and all these people got me there.

0:56:27 > 0:56:29I couldn't have done it without them.

0:56:29 > 0:56:34Thank you. You've done it. You're there.

0:56:34 > 0:56:36I'm so proud of you.

0:56:36 > 0:56:38We will get through this in April together.

0:56:38 > 0:56:42And... It's going to be really tough, though, really tough.

0:56:42 > 0:56:45If you told me now I had to go and run another ten miles,

0:56:45 > 0:56:46there's just no way I could do it.

0:56:46 > 0:56:48So, a lot more training ahead.

0:56:50 > 0:56:53Next time, the runners are joined by the Royal family.

0:56:53 > 0:56:54Keep those feet going.

0:56:54 > 0:56:57What we need to be able to do is create a platform where,

0:56:57 > 0:56:58when the time is right,

0:56:58 > 0:57:01you can come and talk about whatever you want to talk about.

0:57:01 > 0:57:02- Can I ask you one question? - Please do.

0:57:02 > 0:57:04- Obviously, when your mum passed away...- Yeah.

0:57:04 > 0:57:07..you were obviously a little bit older than my children,

0:57:07 > 0:57:09- but I obviously worry about them growing up.- Yeah.

0:57:09 > 0:57:11- They'll be OK, won't they? - They'll be absolutely fine.

0:57:11 > 0:57:13With a mum like you, they'll be absolutely fine.

0:57:13 > 0:57:15You're the heroes because you're standing up there,

0:57:15 > 0:57:17very bravely telling your stories.

0:57:17 > 0:57:18As training intensifies...

0:57:18 > 0:57:20Oh, Jesus!

0:57:20 > 0:57:22..the epic challenge bites back...

0:57:22 > 0:57:24- I'm in a lot of pain.- So am I.

0:57:24 > 0:57:28..and casts doubt over who will make it to this year's London Marathon.

0:57:28 > 0:57:29I haven't been training this week.

0:57:29 > 0:57:33As a result, I just don't feel very good.

0:57:33 > 0:57:37- You OK?- Yeah. It's emotional!

0:57:37 > 0:57:40There's going to be a lot more tears before that finish line,

0:57:40 > 0:57:41absolutely no doubt.

0:57:41 > 0:57:44I just feel like I'm not going to be able to do it.