The Best Action Film Ever!

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0:00:02 > 0:00:04Hi, I'm David Hasselhoff and if you've never seen me before

0:00:04 > 0:00:08the chances are you're either not human or you're under a week old.

0:00:08 > 0:00:12I've done all kinds of movies, from horror, sci-fi, action,

0:00:12 > 0:00:15romance to sports and even dance movies.

0:00:15 > 0:00:20And now, I'm ready to share my encyclopaedic knowledge of film with you -

0:00:20 > 0:00:23the normal people who make it all worthwhile.

0:00:23 > 0:00:26So, join me as I lead you all through

0:00:26 > 0:00:30The Hoff's Best Action Film Ever!

0:00:31 > 0:00:35This programme contains some violent scenes

0:00:46 > 0:00:48I love action movies.

0:00:48 > 0:00:52They fire the audience up like no other genre.

0:00:52 > 0:00:54Later on, I'm going to reveal

0:00:54 > 0:00:58which one the Hoff thinks is the best action film ever.

0:00:59 > 0:01:03I think a great action movie has to have things going for it

0:01:03 > 0:01:05that really make it zing.

0:01:05 > 0:01:08So, take my hand, follow me

0:01:08 > 0:01:09into the danger zone

0:01:09 > 0:01:13and let's see what those mother kissers are.

0:01:14 > 0:01:18First up, we'll have some reckless driving.

0:01:18 > 0:01:20Every time I get into a taxi, I do want to just shout, "Drive!"

0:01:23 > 0:01:26We'll meet the heroes whose job it is to save the day.

0:01:26 > 0:01:28They're just all-man.

0:01:28 > 0:01:29Man, man, man, man!

0:01:29 > 0:01:30Get in there,

0:01:30 > 0:01:32beat him up,

0:01:32 > 0:01:34get the girl,

0:01:34 > 0:01:35good to go!

0:01:35 > 0:01:37And they'll be doing it all in their underwear.

0:01:37 > 0:01:39Every action hero's got to have a white vest.

0:01:39 > 0:01:41Die Hard's vest is the best vest,

0:01:41 > 0:01:43because it's really manky.

0:01:45 > 0:01:50We'll meet the villains who are out to cause trouble wherever they go.

0:01:50 > 0:01:51Agh!

0:01:51 > 0:01:53They're so bad they don't even need to be angry.

0:01:53 > 0:01:56It was the least I could do for a friend.

0:01:56 > 0:01:59They used to need a cat, not any more.

0:01:59 > 0:02:02And we'll have chaos...

0:02:02 > 0:02:03..destruction...

0:02:04 > 0:02:06Guys, we lost another car.

0:02:08 > 0:02:09Who's paying for this?

0:02:10 > 0:02:12..And non-stop explosions.

0:02:12 > 0:02:14They have outrageous expenditure

0:02:14 > 0:02:17where they just completely don't take reality into question.

0:02:17 > 0:02:19That's it.

0:02:22 > 0:02:25Now, let's get the adrenaline pumping.

0:02:25 > 0:02:28Nothing lets you know who's the cat and who's the mouse,

0:02:28 > 0:02:32in an action movie, like a good chase scene.

0:02:32 > 0:02:38Now, they could be on boats, on foot, mopeds, horses, cats, anything.

0:02:38 > 0:02:42Actually, scrap cats, cats are a pain in the ass to work with.

0:02:42 > 0:02:45But which movie chase is the best ever?

0:02:45 > 0:02:48Buckle up and let the Hoff take you on the ride of a lifetime.

0:02:54 > 0:02:55I love a chase.

0:02:55 > 0:02:58There's nothing that gets the heart racing in an action film

0:02:58 > 0:03:00like a good chase.

0:03:01 > 0:03:05So the boat chase in The World Is Not Enough, right?

0:03:05 > 0:03:09Bond's rolling and he's chasing the thing and they're rolling around

0:03:09 > 0:03:12and they're bumping and his hair is staying immaculate, by the way.

0:03:12 > 0:03:15And he jumps over the thing.

0:03:15 > 0:03:17They blow up on the thing and then they roll around on the thing

0:03:17 > 0:03:19and they bounce, bounce on that thing.

0:03:19 > 0:03:23And then they go up on the thing and the thing goes bang.

0:03:23 > 0:03:25And that's Bond - he just rolls, that's how he rolls.

0:03:27 > 0:03:31Particular favourites are those that are done in reverse.

0:03:36 > 0:03:39In Drive, those car scenes are incredible.

0:03:47 > 0:03:50Everything that I'll never be, Gosling is.

0:03:51 > 0:03:55The way he just drives and is this silent, avenging hero.

0:03:55 > 0:03:57Whereas, I'd be pulling over,

0:03:57 > 0:04:00neurotically overanalysing the situation, double-checking my map.

0:04:00 > 0:04:01"Have I got the address right?"

0:04:01 > 0:04:04I'd run out of fuel, I'd have to top up my fuel just to make sure I didn't...

0:04:04 > 0:04:06And then I'd just lose it.

0:04:08 > 0:04:09You need a market.

0:04:09 > 0:04:12The market, then straight.

0:04:14 > 0:04:15There's got to be fruit.

0:04:17 > 0:04:19Because when the car crash comes through the market,

0:04:19 > 0:04:21the fruit goes everywhere.

0:04:26 > 0:04:28And I'd be like, "No, not the apples."

0:04:28 > 0:04:30CROWD SHOUTS

0:04:31 > 0:04:34Gene Hackman in The French Connection

0:04:34 > 0:04:36has one of the best car chases,

0:04:36 > 0:04:42which goes to show a '70s movie still holds up for its cars.

0:04:44 > 0:04:46Hold it!

0:04:47 > 0:04:48He waves the car down.

0:04:48 > 0:04:49Police emergency, I need your car.

0:04:49 > 0:04:52And the guy goes, "Hey, what are you doing? That's my car!

0:04:52 > 0:04:55"Aah, ooh!!"

0:04:55 > 0:04:57And then they cut to the chase.

0:05:05 > 0:05:08Something that really annoys me in some contemporary action movies

0:05:08 > 0:05:12is that they're shot very, you know, shaky cam,

0:05:12 > 0:05:13you just sort of can't really make out

0:05:13 > 0:05:15what's actually supposed to be happening.

0:05:21 > 0:05:25What I think people tend to overlook in a chase scene is

0:05:25 > 0:05:28the fact that there's lots of cars around them.

0:05:28 > 0:05:30They've ruined their day.

0:05:33 > 0:05:36There's going to be a lot of fall back from that.

0:05:36 > 0:05:37There's going to be queues for hours.

0:05:41 > 0:05:47Boys, you've got this crash element too. You want to see it crash.

0:05:50 > 0:05:53Every time I get into a taxi, I do want to just shout, "Drive!"

0:05:56 > 0:05:59You want to see it be loud and go fast and smash.

0:05:59 > 0:06:01I get that, I think it's ridiculous.

0:06:01 > 0:06:03All men are children.

0:06:03 > 0:06:05But then we see a car chase and we go,

0:06:05 > 0:06:07"Oh, I just...I want to play with my Scalextric again

0:06:07 > 0:06:09"and crash them into each other and go kaboom

0:06:09 > 0:06:11"and set everything on fire." Yeah!

0:06:18 > 0:06:21Amateurs! Haven't they ever heard of turbo boost?

0:06:21 > 0:06:24OK, OK, big budgets can take an action movie to another level

0:06:24 > 0:06:25like no other genre.

0:06:25 > 0:06:28Now, don't get me wrong, I'm no fan of wasting money,

0:06:28 > 0:06:31but spending the kind of dough that could stabilise

0:06:31 > 0:06:37a small African country on blowing up a sugar-glass ice palace?

0:06:37 > 0:06:39Well, it sure looks good on camera.

0:06:39 > 0:06:42Here are some big budget action sequences that would make

0:06:42 > 0:06:45your bank manager's eyes water.

0:06:49 > 0:06:52Outrageous destruction is why we see action movies.

0:06:54 > 0:06:56I think ultimately we want to see stuff blow up

0:06:56 > 0:06:58and we want to see stuff blow up real good.

0:07:01 > 0:07:04Most action films are outrageous.

0:07:04 > 0:07:06In fact, I think that's the sign of a good action film

0:07:06 > 0:07:08when they have outrageous expenditure.

0:07:11 > 0:07:15Where they just completely don't take reality into question.

0:07:23 > 0:07:25Action movies are a lot of money.

0:07:32 > 0:07:35You have to blow up a certain amount of cars...

0:07:39 > 0:07:41..a bridge is always good...

0:07:48 > 0:07:51..helicopters are great.

0:07:51 > 0:07:52No!

0:07:57 > 0:07:59I know from doing a little bit of filming myself

0:07:59 > 0:08:02that there's a lot of takes involved!

0:08:02 > 0:08:06Imagine setting those explosion wires and everything that goes off.

0:08:06 > 0:08:10I mean, Die Hard 4.0, that moment when the car goes off the ramp,

0:08:10 > 0:08:11hits the helicopter...

0:08:21 > 0:08:23You're going to lose a helicopter, you're going to lose a car.

0:08:23 > 0:08:25What if the car doesn't quite hit it?

0:08:25 > 0:08:27You're going to have to reset it. "Guys, we lost another car.

0:08:27 > 0:08:30"How many is that?" "I think it's ten, John. Ten cars."

0:08:34 > 0:08:35"Who's paying for this?"

0:08:35 > 0:08:38Yeah, so it's very, very expensive to do.

0:08:48 > 0:08:51Well, as you pick the glass out of your hair, it's time for us

0:08:51 > 0:08:54to meet someone no action movie could do without -

0:08:54 > 0:08:55the heroes.

0:08:55 > 0:08:57Everyone needs a hero.

0:08:57 > 0:09:00Let's face it, yours is probably me,

0:09:00 > 0:09:02which I'm cool with.

0:09:02 > 0:09:05Action movie heroes have to be cool - check.

0:09:05 > 0:09:07Handsome - check.

0:09:07 > 0:09:09Tough - check.

0:09:09 > 0:09:10Brave - check.

0:09:10 > 0:09:12Resourceful - check.

0:09:12 > 0:09:13Flawed...

0:09:13 > 0:09:18I'm...I'm sorry, I can't help you there, the Hoff doesn't do flaws.

0:09:18 > 0:09:21Check out the Hoff's very own action hero dream team.

0:09:27 > 0:09:30An action hero has got to be a born and bred action guy.

0:09:36 > 0:09:39He's just a muscly guy who's in the gym 18 hours a day.

0:09:42 > 0:09:45People, they're going out there and they're brave and they're cool

0:09:45 > 0:09:48and they're so confident and they quit their jobs

0:09:48 > 0:09:50and they take the law into their own hands.

0:09:52 > 0:09:53They're just all man.

0:09:55 > 0:09:56You know - man, man, man.

0:09:56 > 0:09:59Life's a joke, shitbird.

0:09:59 > 0:10:02If you don't want that Fu Manchu knocked back into the '60s,

0:10:02 > 0:10:05you better keep your gum-chewing trap shut and show some respect.

0:10:05 > 0:10:06Bring it.

0:10:06 > 0:10:08A good action hero has to be autonomous,

0:10:08 > 0:10:10they have to make their own decisions.

0:10:10 > 0:10:13Just pack up your little circus or I'm going to come

0:10:13 > 0:10:14and I'm going to kick your ass.

0:10:14 > 0:10:17Can you imagine Tom Cruise in Mission: Impossible going,

0:10:17 > 0:10:18"I just need to check something."

0:10:22 > 0:10:23"I just need to make sure, are we allowed to do that?"

0:10:23 > 0:10:25Can I ask you something, Kittridge?

0:10:26 > 0:10:29"OK, can you...? Right, no, we can't."

0:10:30 > 0:10:32"They're saying no. We're getting a no here, guys."

0:10:32 > 0:10:34A pleasant evening.

0:10:34 > 0:10:38With James Bond, he's sort of sophisticated as well as tough.

0:10:43 > 0:10:44Daniel Craig, I think,

0:10:44 > 0:10:46is a brilliant blend of both of those things, perhaps more so

0:10:46 > 0:10:49than any of the other actors who've ever played James Bond.

0:10:57 > 0:11:01Most men think, "Oh, yeah, I'm a few steps away of being James Bond.

0:11:02 > 0:11:04"With a bit more training,

0:11:04 > 0:11:07"I too could have a licence to kill and be a bit like 007."

0:11:13 > 0:11:16There was a trend in the 1980s of incredibly muscled action men

0:11:16 > 0:11:20led by Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger, of course.

0:11:20 > 0:11:22Arnold Schwarzenegger isn't the everyman.

0:11:26 > 0:11:28Sly Stallone isn't the everyman.

0:11:35 > 0:11:36I suppose more recently,

0:11:36 > 0:11:39Jason Bourne seems a bit like that but you know, you soon see

0:11:39 > 0:11:42their skills and their kung fu kicks and you realise they're not.

0:11:42 > 0:11:44He's probably the first action hero who doesn't have any,

0:11:44 > 0:11:46sort of, funny little quips.

0:11:50 > 0:11:52I mean, he really looks like he can kick some butt

0:11:52 > 0:11:53and he does, obviously.

0:11:53 > 0:11:55Do you have a Jason Bourne in custody?

0:11:55 > 0:11:58- Yes, I do.- Listen, he's an agency priority target...

0:11:58 > 0:12:00MUFFLED SPEECH

0:12:00 > 0:12:03- 'Call me back as soon as he's secure.'- I understand.

0:12:13 > 0:12:15Not bad, guys, not bad.

0:12:15 > 0:12:20Though I do suspect I could take any of them on mano-a-mano,

0:12:20 > 0:12:23if that's Spanish for "with a flamethrower".

0:12:23 > 0:12:26But that ain't going to happen, because I am no bad guy.

0:12:26 > 0:12:29I'm David Hasselhoff!

0:12:29 > 0:12:31Bad guys in action movies are narcissistic,

0:12:31 > 0:12:36delusional about their ability and hellbent on world domination.

0:12:36 > 0:12:39Wait a minute, maybe I am a bad guy.

0:12:39 > 0:12:43Whatever, here comes the baddest of the bad.

0:12:48 > 0:12:50You need to have that guy that you really hate throughout the film

0:12:50 > 0:12:53and you think, "Go on, just go on, lamp him. Lamp him!"

0:12:53 > 0:12:55Just as long as in an action movie you can shout out

0:12:55 > 0:12:57and get really passionate about it.

0:12:57 > 0:13:00They have to have a swagger, a sneer

0:13:00 > 0:13:04and most often they have to have a British accent.

0:13:04 > 0:13:08ENGLISH ACCENT: You see, Mr Bond, like every great artist,

0:13:08 > 0:13:13I want to create an indisputable masterpiece once in my lifetime.

0:13:13 > 0:13:15The death of 007.

0:13:15 > 0:13:17It seems to be something to do with

0:13:17 > 0:13:20the tightness of the posh, middle-class English...

0:13:20 > 0:13:22People, in their heads abroad, they associate it with a

0:13:22 > 0:13:25tight inward character - if you clip your vowels and clip your language,

0:13:25 > 0:13:27there must be something inside you that hates everyone.

0:13:27 > 0:13:30It's that look, that steely, murderous look

0:13:30 > 0:13:32that a villain needs to have.

0:13:32 > 0:13:35Especially when you can go from laughing

0:13:35 > 0:13:36to suddenly looking serious.

0:13:39 > 0:13:41Hilarious question.

0:13:41 > 0:13:43They're so bad they don't even need to be angry.

0:13:43 > 0:13:47It was the least I could do for a friend.

0:13:47 > 0:13:50The villain in an action movie is always weaselly and smart.

0:13:50 > 0:13:52Just do it.

0:13:52 > 0:13:54He's always injured in some way.

0:13:54 > 0:13:56And you know what I think that is?

0:13:56 > 0:13:59I think that in high school the bully is the tough guy

0:13:59 > 0:14:04and the little smart guys are like "One day, asshole, one day!"

0:14:04 > 0:14:07The villain is always the little guy who got picked on

0:14:07 > 0:14:09who finally lost it and became a psycho.

0:14:09 > 0:14:13- HE GROANS - No!

0:14:13 > 0:14:16Leon, Gary Oldman in that is incredible.

0:14:16 > 0:14:19It's that bit, just where he just...

0:14:19 > 0:14:21BACK CRACKS

0:14:23 > 0:14:26Just does that before the fight scene, the shooting,

0:14:26 > 0:14:29basically, where he takes out a whole family.

0:14:32 > 0:14:35They used to need a cat.

0:14:35 > 0:14:38Not any more. If you've got a cat, hmm, doesn't really cut it.

0:14:38 > 0:14:42The villain needs to be evil.

0:14:42 > 0:14:45And yet still you can relate to them, you know?

0:14:45 > 0:14:49Like, you can almost want them to succeed.

0:14:49 > 0:14:52Still got a lot of love for Rickman in Die Hard.

0:14:52 > 0:14:56How nice to make your acquaintance.

0:14:56 > 0:14:58Just so sneery and snide

0:14:58 > 0:15:00and he's got his own funny little payback lines.

0:15:00 > 0:15:04All your little speeches, you're nothing but a common thief.

0:15:05 > 0:15:07I am an exceptional thief, Mrs McClane,

0:15:07 > 0:15:09and since I'm moving up to kidnapping,

0:15:09 > 0:15:11you should be more polite.

0:15:11 > 0:15:15He's got that mixture of being absolutely psychopathic

0:15:15 > 0:15:17and nasty and will clearly do anything to get his way.

0:15:17 > 0:15:20Give me the code.

0:15:21 > 0:15:22One...

0:15:25 > 0:15:26..Two...

0:15:28 > 0:15:29..Three.

0:15:29 > 0:15:31I don't know it, I'm telling you.

0:15:31 > 0:15:33Get on a jet to Tokyo and ask the chairman, I'm telling you,

0:15:33 > 0:15:35you'll just have to kill me.

0:15:35 > 0:15:37OK.

0:15:38 > 0:15:40Wow, those guys are bad.

0:15:40 > 0:15:43Now, let's take a look at some truly jaw-dropping moments

0:15:43 > 0:15:46from the best action films ever.

0:15:46 > 0:15:49I'm not talking about me with my shirt undone!

0:15:49 > 0:15:52I'm talking about the crazy world of action stunts.

0:15:52 > 0:15:57Stunts are the most important thing to nail in an action movie.

0:15:57 > 0:16:00For you guys, the idea of being thrown out of a burning helicopter

0:16:00 > 0:16:03on fire is a worst-case scenario.

0:16:03 > 0:16:05For me, it's something I get the stunt guy to do

0:16:05 > 0:16:07while I play golf with Hulk Hogan.

0:16:07 > 0:16:11Here's the Hoff's guide to amazing action movie stunts.

0:16:11 > 0:16:13I've got to call Hulk.

0:16:17 > 0:16:19The best place to put a great stunt

0:16:19 > 0:16:22is right at the beginning of the film.

0:16:29 > 0:16:32It captures the audience and from that minute,

0:16:32 > 0:16:36you're kind of sucked into the film. You're on the edge of your seat.

0:16:44 > 0:16:47The stuntmen in these action movies...

0:16:47 > 0:16:52I think they've just got to be slightly off their crock.

0:16:53 > 0:16:57Pierce Brosnan's stunt double did the bungee jump for real.

0:16:57 > 0:16:58It's over 200 metres.

0:16:58 > 0:17:00It set a record at the time.

0:17:07 > 0:17:08Stunts make the film,

0:17:08 > 0:17:11but then again, I don't like people who are a bit cocky about it.

0:17:11 > 0:17:12You know you get these actors like,

0:17:12 > 0:17:14"Hey, I'm Tom Cruise, I do my own stunts."

0:17:14 > 0:17:15Do you? Who cares. Jog on.

0:17:22 > 0:17:25In Mission: Impossible where - I like to call it the wedgie scene -

0:17:25 > 0:17:27where he's lowered down.

0:17:30 > 0:17:32And there is that kind of stunt where he's held

0:17:32 > 0:17:36and he's doing that for the whole... he's just waving his arms about.

0:17:37 > 0:17:39The man is mental.

0:17:39 > 0:17:43How much insurance must've cost for him is like...unimaginable!

0:17:43 > 0:17:45If you think of the last Mission: Impossible film

0:17:45 > 0:17:47with that building in Dubai.

0:17:48 > 0:17:53His director must be sort of just thinking, "What is he doing?"

0:17:58 > 0:18:01So, we have established that for a great action flick

0:18:01 > 0:18:03we need hair-raising stunts,

0:18:03 > 0:18:08exploding cars, cool heroes and psychopathic bad guys.

0:18:08 > 0:18:10But there's something missing.

0:18:10 > 0:18:13Something that makes the Hoff's world go round.

0:18:13 > 0:18:16I'm talking about the ladies.

0:18:16 > 0:18:19Women. The fairer sex.

0:18:19 > 0:18:21Las chicawandas!

0:18:21 > 0:18:25And though I've traded in all my 40 volumes of my little black book,

0:18:25 > 0:18:31I still know a thing or two about what makes a babe sizzle on screen.

0:18:31 > 0:18:35Suck in those stomachs, guys, here come the girls.

0:18:41 > 0:18:44I think there is a part for women in action films.

0:18:44 > 0:18:48The part where they're like, "Oh, no!"

0:18:48 > 0:18:52SCREAMING

0:18:52 > 0:18:54"Oh, nooo!"

0:18:54 > 0:18:57That's the part for women in action films.

0:18:57 > 0:19:00Move over, women, it's for men and their muscles.

0:19:05 > 0:19:10Heroes need inspiration and there's nothing more inspiring

0:19:10 > 0:19:13than somebody that you fancy just a little bit.

0:19:13 > 0:19:15I mean, you've only met her five minutes

0:19:15 > 0:19:16so you fancy her a little bit, not great.

0:19:16 > 0:19:18It's not like love but you fancy her.

0:19:18 > 0:19:20Mr Bond?

0:19:20 > 0:19:22I'm sorry, what was the bet?

0:19:22 > 0:19:24Women have a hard time in action movies cos they're often

0:19:24 > 0:19:30written in purely to be this kind of, you know, damsel in distress.

0:19:30 > 0:19:32The purpose of women in action films generally speaking,

0:19:32 > 0:19:35sadly, and this is something that stems from the '60s,

0:19:35 > 0:19:38a very sexist time, was for them to be kidnapped and ultimately rescued

0:19:38 > 0:19:40and then look at the leading man

0:19:40 > 0:19:43with, you know, luscious, long eyelashes

0:19:43 > 0:19:46and just bat them and simper.

0:19:53 > 0:19:55But it's changing, it is changing.

0:19:55 > 0:19:59Angelina Jolie is a real trailblazer in that respect.

0:20:10 > 0:20:13Of course ladies have a place in an action film! Of course they do!

0:20:13 > 0:20:16And their place in it is to show the man that they can be

0:20:16 > 0:20:23as strong as him and kick ass as well as him, if not better than him.

0:20:23 > 0:20:24Yeah!

0:20:24 > 0:20:28And if they look good too it's a great attribute, I'm just saying.

0:20:32 > 0:20:33Hi yah!

0:20:38 > 0:20:42Kill Bill is a real exception to the sort of weak female characters

0:20:42 > 0:20:44in action movies' standard.

0:20:44 > 0:20:47Uma Thurman, that yellow jumpsuit.

0:20:47 > 0:20:50There's that whole scene where she takes out, what is it, 150 henchmen?

0:20:59 > 0:21:02It's an incredible scene. An amazing, amazing scene.

0:21:02 > 0:21:03Yeah, she's ruthless.

0:21:07 > 0:21:09Wow, pretty hot, right?

0:21:09 > 0:21:13Woo! But don't start thinking the Hoff is going shallow on you.

0:21:13 > 0:21:16Because now we're going to check out the men.

0:21:16 > 0:21:19Yes, it's not just the girls' bodies on show

0:21:19 > 0:21:23in the action movie genre, the guys like to show off their guns

0:21:23 > 0:21:27and their pecs as often as the director will let them.

0:21:27 > 0:21:31And having spent over a decade in nothing but a pair of red shorts,

0:21:31 > 0:21:33I can certainly relate to that.

0:21:33 > 0:21:37Here come some Hoff-approved hunks for the ladies.

0:21:42 > 0:21:45At some point, the guy usually takes their top off.

0:21:45 > 0:21:48You've got to take the shirt off. Take the shirt off!

0:21:48 > 0:21:49Hey, man, just do what you got to do.

0:21:49 > 0:21:52MUSIC: "Candy Shop" by 50 Cent

0:21:58 > 0:22:00- Fire it up.- Well, let's do it, bro,

0:22:00 > 0:22:02it's taken you a couple of years to do a couple of letters.

0:22:05 > 0:22:07This nation loves a torso.

0:22:10 > 0:22:12It's never a hairy torso any more.

0:22:12 > 0:22:15I miss a hairy torso.

0:22:15 > 0:22:18You don't want it waxed because then it grows back like stubbly,

0:22:18 > 0:22:22so, really, we want you to cover up that spiky stubble with

0:22:22 > 0:22:27a lovely, you know, Egyptian cotton, if you can manage it, T-shirt.

0:22:27 > 0:22:30The white vest is a symbol of manliness

0:22:30 > 0:22:32and the kings of the white vest are people like

0:22:32 > 0:22:34Nicolas Cage, as Cameron Poe in Con Air,

0:22:34 > 0:22:38and of course Bruce Willis as John McClane.

0:22:40 > 0:22:44Die Hard's vest is the best vest, because it's really manky.

0:22:47 > 0:22:49When you're running around, you're sweating, you're dirty,

0:22:49 > 0:22:51you forgot to put on deodorant

0:22:51 > 0:22:52cos you're not exfoliating, you're a man!

0:22:58 > 0:23:00Now it's time for me to talk about something

0:23:00 > 0:23:02that gets all action fans' pulses racing

0:23:02 > 0:23:05and shuffles their butts to the very precipice of their seats -

0:23:05 > 0:23:07the big showdown, the finale,

0:23:07 > 0:23:11the climax of our boom, bang-a-bang bullet fest.

0:23:11 > 0:23:14I'm talking about the fight at the end where the good guys

0:23:14 > 0:23:18and the bad guys start to look like my career...

0:23:18 > 0:23:21they will not die!

0:23:26 > 0:23:33My favourite thing of any action movie is the classic knife duel.

0:23:36 > 0:23:41It happens in a lot of films where they basically go, knife,

0:23:41 > 0:23:44and the other person stops it just before it gets to their head.

0:23:46 > 0:23:51- And they're like - "Oh, oh, oh". - LABOURED BREATHING

0:23:51 > 0:23:53And then maybe it touches the eyeball and they're like...

0:23:55 > 0:23:57He goes...

0:24:00 > 0:24:02He goes...

0:24:03 > 0:24:06.."Aaah," and then throws him off.

0:24:06 > 0:24:09There's got to be that moment where he's like...

0:24:09 > 0:24:12He sees that moment where he knows what he's got to do.

0:24:12 > 0:24:15He's got to beat up someone who's twice the size of him.

0:24:20 > 0:24:22There's that scene in Bourne Ultimatum

0:24:22 > 0:24:24where he just puts the book against the guy's neck,

0:24:24 > 0:24:26there's a punch, there's a twist of the book...

0:24:27 > 0:24:29It's very fast - action paced.

0:24:35 > 0:24:38You're usually left with one villain who is almost impossible to kill

0:24:38 > 0:24:40and the triumphant, climactic moment

0:24:40 > 0:24:42may well be where you finally dispatch them.

0:24:55 > 0:24:58There's always got to be a bit as well where the action villain

0:24:58 > 0:25:01is dead but then, "Oh, God, he's come back to life!"

0:25:05 > 0:25:07And he tries to shoot.

0:25:16 > 0:25:19So, earlier I promised I would lead you through the fireballs

0:25:19 > 0:25:24to reveal which action movie kicks all other action movie butts.

0:25:24 > 0:25:27Well, I think you've probably guessed by now,

0:25:27 > 0:25:31it's the one that has the baddest bad guys, the biggest explosions,

0:25:31 > 0:25:37the funniest lines, and a plot simple enough for your dog to understand.

0:25:37 > 0:25:38It's simply the best.

0:25:38 > 0:25:43Yippee-ki-yay, the Hoff's best action film ever is...

0:25:48 > 0:25:50Die Hard's got all those ingredients

0:25:50 > 0:25:54and more that you need for an action film.

0:25:54 > 0:25:58Die Hard is just such a simple story.

0:25:58 > 0:26:01The idea of this skyscraper that one guy has to save,

0:26:01 > 0:26:03I think is very basic but brilliant.

0:26:07 > 0:26:08Shit!

0:26:10 > 0:26:13Wonderful relationship between the hero, John McClane,

0:26:13 > 0:26:14and the bad guy, Hans Gruber.

0:26:14 > 0:26:19Still the cowboy, Mr McClane. Americans - all alike.

0:26:19 > 0:26:21Well, this time John Wayne does not walk off into the sunset

0:26:21 > 0:26:23with Grace Kelly.

0:26:23 > 0:26:25That's Gary Cooper, asshole.

0:26:25 > 0:26:27Enough jokes.

0:26:27 > 0:26:29John McClane makes Die Hard such a classic,

0:26:29 > 0:26:33because he's a little bit rough around the edges.

0:26:33 > 0:26:34He's reduced to just running around...

0:26:37 > 0:26:40..there's glass everywhere,

0:26:40 > 0:26:41he's got no shoes on for God's sake.

0:26:41 > 0:26:45It's like they really can't push him any further in that film.

0:26:48 > 0:26:52Great plot, great location, sense of humour, thrills - it has it all.

0:27:00 > 0:27:05So, Die Hard is officially the Hoff's best action film ever.

0:27:05 > 0:27:09But remember, mega-violence, however fun to watch,

0:27:09 > 0:27:12isn't the way to solve problems in real life.

0:27:12 > 0:27:15So if you find yourself in an elevator,

0:27:15 > 0:27:20staring at a bomb on Christmas Eve, do what I would do -

0:27:20 > 0:27:24run away in slow motion, Baywatch-style.

0:27:24 > 0:27:28This is the Hoff, signing off. Good night.

0:27:36 > 0:27:43Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd