0:00:02 > 0:00:06This programme contains very strong language
0:00:06 > 0:00:12This used to be called cardboard city number one. Embankment used to be called cardboard city number two.
0:00:30 > 0:00:34One, two, three, four,
0:00:34 > 0:00:38five, six, seven,
0:00:38 > 0:00:41eight, nine, ten.
0:00:52 > 0:00:54You died, baby, didn't you?
0:00:59 > 0:01:02Jumped off the bridge age of 15.
0:01:04 > 0:01:07She stood here and she jumped off the bridge.
0:01:26 > 0:01:2912, 13, 14...
0:01:31 > 0:01:35..15, 16, 17...
0:01:46 > 0:01:4817.
0:01:50 > 0:01:51She was 19.
0:01:52 > 0:01:54She had an axe through her head.
0:01:54 > 0:01:58Her hands tied behind her back with feet in cement.
0:01:58 > 0:02:01The police dragged her out.
0:02:01 > 0:02:03She got killed.
0:02:03 > 0:02:05They was homeless.
0:02:05 > 0:02:08And she was homeless.
0:02:21 > 0:02:23Home sweet home...
0:02:23 > 0:02:26and you fucking spoilt it.
0:02:35 > 0:02:39All them cafes and shops, waiters...
0:02:39 > 0:02:41fucking everything.
0:02:41 > 0:02:44Where's my home?
0:02:44 > 0:02:46Where's my home?!
0:02:50 > 0:02:53Hello, you're gorgeous, aren't you?
0:02:53 > 0:02:56Hang on, don't go away.
0:02:57 > 0:03:00You're beautiful. There you go.
0:03:00 > 0:03:02Oh, no, don't give her your money!
0:03:02 > 0:03:04- No, there you are.- No, no, no, don't.
0:03:04 > 0:03:06No, no, don't. I find that offensive.
0:03:06 > 0:03:11- I'm sorry I don't mean to offend you.- No, that's offensive.
0:03:11 > 0:03:14Now you look after your mummy, all right?
0:03:14 > 0:03:17This very nice lady gave you that money. That's a lot of money.
0:03:17 > 0:03:20- That's a pound there. - Mummy will look after it for you.
0:03:20 > 0:03:23All right? But don't get drunk on it, all right?
0:03:23 > 0:03:25Well, that's very, very kind of you.
0:03:25 > 0:03:29- Thank you.- That's all right. But I find that offensive.
0:03:29 > 0:03:32- I am sorry.- But she's gorgeous. - Thank you.
0:03:32 > 0:03:36You look after your mum when you grow up.
0:03:36 > 0:03:39I don't care about money.
0:03:39 > 0:03:42All I care about is my home.
0:03:42 > 0:03:45This wasn't here.
0:03:45 > 0:03:48All that crap wasn't there.
0:03:51 > 0:03:56Food and drinks. Fuck food and drinks - this is our home!
0:03:56 > 0:03:58And you all took it away from us.
0:03:58 > 0:04:00This is our home.
0:04:05 > 0:04:07This is my home.
0:04:07 > 0:04:09My home!
0:04:32 > 0:04:34Have you tried to find out where a particle actually is?
0:04:34 > 0:04:40It stops being a wave and becomes a particle in a different place.
0:04:40 > 0:04:44- Well... - Yes, have I understood it correctly?
0:04:44 > 0:04:46Well, these days I don't think...
0:04:46 > 0:04:51one normally describes quantum mechanics
0:04:51 > 0:04:55in the wave particle duality in the way that one used to.
0:04:55 > 0:04:59I think things are treated as particles but they have...
0:04:59 > 0:05:03their location is a probability dis...which is wave function.
0:05:03 > 0:05:07Wave function - that's the expression I meant. The solution of
0:05:07 > 0:05:09the Schrodinger equation is wave function. There we are!
0:05:09 > 0:05:13It's all perfectly simple really, isn't it?
0:05:13 > 0:05:15< Paul, what's your background?
0:05:15 > 0:05:21Well, I did have a couple of degrees in mathematics but I concentrated most on pure.
0:05:21 > 0:05:29There was some quantum mechanics in there, which I have forgotten mostly, and functional analysis.
0:05:29 > 0:05:35I spend a lot of time in bookshops reading various subjects.
0:05:35 > 0:05:36And then where do you sleep?
0:05:36 > 0:05:40Well, um, nowhere, really.
0:05:40 > 0:05:42Nowhere permanent.
0:05:42 > 0:05:44So I tend to, um,
0:05:44 > 0:05:48sleep on night buses.
0:05:48 > 0:05:50At least it's dry, mostly, inside the night bus.
0:06:34 > 0:06:37SIREN WAILS
0:06:56 > 0:06:59It's too early in the morning for that.
0:06:59 > 0:07:04It's only five o'clock, Jean, and you're awake.
0:07:04 > 0:07:09I've been awake off and on. I couldn't sleep properly last night...
0:07:09 > 0:07:11And their fucking racket.
0:07:11 > 0:07:16- Come on you lazy sod, what time do you call this?- Morning!
0:07:16 > 0:07:21Or should I say goodnight. Oh, it's gone again.
0:07:21 > 0:07:24- Jean.- What?- It's gone again.
0:07:26 > 0:07:30That's cos you've been lying on it, you dumbo!
0:07:35 > 0:07:37Here they come. Watch out.
0:07:55 > 0:07:58Oh, rise and shine, you old cunt!
0:08:05 > 0:08:09- Your hair.- What? - I said you haven't combed your hair.
0:08:09 > 0:08:12I just fucking got up! Sorry!
0:08:20 > 0:08:22Get off.
0:08:22 > 0:08:24I can do it myself.
0:08:24 > 0:08:25All right.
0:08:29 > 0:08:30Morning.
0:08:32 > 0:08:35I got the shakes this morning, cor!
0:08:36 > 0:08:39Rattling.
0:08:39 > 0:08:44- You had a good night then. - Mmmmm, slept well, yeah, but had to get up cos I nearly wet the bed.
0:08:53 > 0:08:56It numbs everything, really.
0:08:57 > 0:09:01You know, you don't care after that, do you? You know.
0:09:01 > 0:09:03You just drink and drink and drink.
0:09:03 > 0:09:05I think I am going to be sick.
0:09:05 > 0:09:10Yeah, so... Something's coming... Something's on its way.
0:09:25 > 0:09:28I'm Jesus... Robin Hood. No, not Robin Hood, what's the other fella?
0:09:28 > 0:09:31Steals from the rich and gives to the poor... Robin Hood.
0:09:31 > 0:09:34It's not Robin Hood, it's Robin Tesco, innit.
0:09:34 > 0:09:36If someone's hungry I'll get them summit.
0:09:37 > 0:09:39- Whatever's on the shelves. - Are you hungry?- Yeah.
0:09:39 > 0:09:44- What do you want - meatballs? - Food's food.- He's a very funny guy.
0:09:44 > 0:09:48Yeah, but you know he's dying inside.
0:09:48 > 0:09:54And as far as being Robin Hood, I don't really give a rat's ass if you steal...
0:09:54 > 0:09:59- Yeah, but why are you here? What have you left behind?- What have I left?
0:09:59 > 0:10:04Everyone's got their own problems, everyone's got their own reason why they're here.
0:10:04 > 0:10:09That person's got his own individual mind and he's on the streets for his individual reason.
0:10:09 > 0:10:14- How does that help...?- It doesn't matter what we think of him. Ken's on the street for his own purpose.
0:10:14 > 0:10:19Everyone who's here is on the streets for their own individual purpose.
0:10:19 > 0:10:22Doesn't matter what you say about people, people fucking...
0:10:22 > 0:10:28- They are good to each other, you know what I mean?- He's got a family. He's got kids. He shouldn't be here.
0:10:28 > 0:10:32- Oh, well, that's the way it goes. What have you got?- I don't know.
0:10:32 > 0:10:38- Crinkly old bag... The environment is a hot issue and quite rightly so. - Just eat the fucking thing.
0:10:39 > 0:10:40Perfect.
0:10:44 > 0:10:45Easy as that.
0:10:45 > 0:10:47Sorry about that, Father.
0:10:49 > 0:10:53Went to prison, come out and my wife says she doesn't want to be with me any more.
0:10:53 > 0:10:57So that's why I'm back on the street. I done this in '85 to '95.
0:10:57 > 0:11:01And now I'm back doing it again. It's just shit, really.
0:11:01 > 0:11:05When I was drinking, I was being an idiot, do you know what I mean?
0:11:05 > 0:11:09I was fighting everyone. But now I've stopped the drink, I'm all right now.
0:11:11 > 0:11:17Trying to get rid of us all. We're an embarrassment. But they put us here in the first place.
0:11:17 > 0:11:22I don't see them trying to get rid of the Polish and all that bollocks. Send them all home. Then we'd be OK.
0:11:22 > 0:11:28Cos you're English, don't have a drug problem, don't have an alcohol problem. No help for you, my son.
0:11:28 > 0:11:30No, you don't get nothing, bruv.
0:11:30 > 0:11:35I'll lay you odds - out of 30 people that go in that night shelter, 28 are Eastern Europeans.
0:11:35 > 0:11:38You might see two English people walking through that door.
0:11:46 > 0:11:48I am Grizzly.
0:11:51 > 0:11:55- I am from Polish. - < Poland, yes.- Poland.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57Where do you live?
0:11:57 > 0:12:02Park, my life, my God... Oh, shits...cock...
0:12:04 > 0:12:07SPEAKS IN POLISH
0:12:07 > 0:12:08Grizzly...
0:12:09 > 0:12:12Grizzly too.
0:12:13 > 0:12:15This is your park.
0:12:16 > 0:12:19INDECIPHERABLE
0:12:19 > 0:12:20# You're as cold as ice
0:12:20 > 0:12:23# You're as cold as ice
0:12:23 > 0:12:26# I'll sacrifice everything for you
0:12:26 > 0:12:27# Cold as ice... #
0:12:27 > 0:12:32# I love you, baby I love you, baby... #
0:12:32 > 0:12:36# ..You're as cold as ice Sacrifice everything for you... #
0:12:38 > 0:12:41< Ah! LAUGHTER
0:13:00 > 0:13:03I am sleeping...
0:13:03 > 0:13:04I am homeless.
0:13:05 > 0:13:07Life...
0:13:14 > 0:13:17Iraq, Chechnya,
0:13:17 > 0:13:20Bosnia, Herzegovina...
0:13:44 > 0:13:45I-I-I...army.
0:13:47 > 0:13:49I am sniper.
0:14:02 > 0:14:05I'm...
0:14:15 > 0:14:17SPEAKS FOREIGN LANGUAGE
0:14:28 > 0:14:30SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE
0:14:52 > 0:14:56Arthur, why do you hurt yourself? Why did you do that?
0:14:56 > 0:14:58Why did you put cigarettes...?
0:15:00 > 0:15:02People that you had to kill.
0:15:03 > 0:15:06And who told you to do that?
0:15:18 > 0:15:19A lot.
0:15:19 > 0:15:22One, two, three, four, five, six...
0:15:39 > 0:15:46This one happen... How am I going to say? Because you're going to think I am crazy.
0:15:46 > 0:15:52But this one I cut my throat, I cut my throat.
0:15:52 > 0:15:55Everyone can tell you I'm crazy sometimes.
0:15:55 > 0:15:57Why? Why did you do that?
0:15:57 > 0:15:59Because I'm crazy sometimes.
0:16:03 > 0:16:08I don't know why, just my...
0:16:08 > 0:16:11my mum now is dead.
0:16:11 > 0:16:13Yeah, she's dead.
0:16:14 > 0:16:1646 years...
0:16:17 > 0:16:21- You have?- My mum is dead also.
0:16:21 > 0:16:24You have... How old are you?
0:16:24 > 0:16:27- Ah, me, 59.- Oh, 59.- Yeah.
0:16:28 > 0:16:32My mum have 46 and gone.
0:16:36 > 0:16:39Eh, it's all right.
0:16:39 > 0:16:41- Not for me it's all right.- No.
0:16:41 > 0:16:43I show you.
0:16:46 > 0:16:48I show you.
0:16:55 > 0:16:58Me know... Watch.
0:16:58 > 0:17:00Oh, no! Ricky, no.
0:17:07 > 0:17:09So then, Ricky, when you were 14
0:17:09 > 0:17:14and you were on the street in Slovakia, yeah,
0:17:14 > 0:17:17you joined a gang?
0:17:17 > 0:17:19Like your tattoos.
0:17:19 > 0:17:22- Me tattoo?- Yes.
0:17:22 > 0:17:26Yeah, 14 years and I have these tattoos...
0:17:29 > 0:17:31Is for because...
0:17:33 > 0:17:38I don't know why I tell you... Me no like gypsy guy.
0:17:38 > 0:17:41- You don't like gypsies. - No like black people.
0:17:41 > 0:17:45And have same on there...
0:17:45 > 0:17:47I show you.
0:17:56 > 0:17:59Two black people...have knife...
0:18:00 > 0:18:02..and taken me...
0:18:05 > 0:18:06..just...
0:18:06 > 0:18:12- So you were sleeping in the night and what happened?- This.- That.
0:18:12 > 0:18:15All there stitching.
0:18:15 > 0:18:17- What happened?- Just sleep.
0:18:17 > 0:18:20You were sleeping and somebody came...
0:18:20 > 0:18:25Yeah, and coming two mans, two black people and have knife
0:18:25 > 0:18:29and touch me and take me everything.
0:18:29 > 0:18:34My insurance, my home office, my documents, my money.
0:18:39 > 0:18:42Now I don't have nothing.
0:18:44 > 0:18:46I don't know why I tell you.
0:18:46 > 0:18:48Just...just...
0:18:52 > 0:18:54PIANO MUSIC
0:19:11 > 0:19:18And the other tablets that I take are just to cure the voices in my head.
0:19:22 > 0:19:25Wake up, you lazy bastard.
0:19:35 > 0:19:37She died with cancer...
0:19:37 > 0:19:40and then her husband,
0:19:40 > 0:19:44his daughter's husband started to rape me.
0:19:46 > 0:19:47From the age of 12.
0:19:47 > 0:19:49They raped you when you were 12.
0:19:52 > 0:19:54I'm used to getting raped, it doesn't bother me now.
0:19:56 > 0:19:58I'm used to getting hurt.
0:19:58 > 0:20:01It's like an addiction.
0:20:01 > 0:20:03You can't live without it.
0:20:12 > 0:20:16And then I ran away from home and then at the age of 15,
0:20:16 > 0:20:18this guy asked me to go home with him.
0:20:18 > 0:20:20Cos I said no, he had a knife at my throat,
0:20:22 > 0:20:26then he chucked me over the bridge wall, ended up on the railway lines,
0:20:26 > 0:20:29raped me and the next thing I know I was in Hammersmith Hospital.
0:20:29 > 0:20:31Charing Cross, uh, Hammersmith.
0:20:38 > 0:20:42Then I spent two years in Blackpool and I got raped down there.
0:20:42 > 0:20:43One afternoon.
0:20:43 > 0:20:47Then I came back here and I got raped down here.
0:20:47 > 0:20:50See, so I'm used to it.
0:20:50 > 0:20:52I'm used to getting raped.
0:20:56 > 0:20:57Doesn't bother me now.
0:21:00 > 0:21:02That's my kind of life.
0:21:23 > 0:21:26I get this feeling I'm being followed.
0:21:29 > 0:21:32If I feel like it's going to be damp during the night,
0:21:32 > 0:21:36I quite often sleep under the bridge at Waterloo.
0:21:36 > 0:21:38Which is quite a nice wide bridge.
0:21:38 > 0:21:43Sometimes if it's really chilly, I sleep up by the Buddha Bar.
0:21:43 > 0:21:47Which is quite nice because then I... By the Buddha Bar.
0:21:47 > 0:21:51I get to listen to music and if it's really chilly,
0:21:51 > 0:21:55their central heating system keeps it just a little bit warmer.
0:22:14 > 0:22:17Thank you very much. Thank you, thank you.
0:22:18 > 0:22:23'I've been given the opportunity to stop a lot of waste from occurring
0:22:23 > 0:22:25'and, at the same time, help some people.
0:22:25 > 0:22:30'And every day we, as a race, we throw away so much food.'
0:22:30 > 0:22:35And food is life, so to throw away life, I think, is a criminal act.
0:22:35 > 0:22:39The majority of the people that come to pick up sandwiches
0:22:39 > 0:22:40are obviously just...
0:22:40 > 0:22:43There are some people that are just...
0:22:43 > 0:22:45penniless, skint.
0:22:46 > 0:22:47Noodles and cashew?
0:22:47 > 0:22:49Yes, please.
0:22:49 > 0:22:51Tuna Salad.
0:22:51 > 0:22:53- Yes, please.- Bean Salad.
0:22:53 > 0:22:55- Thank you.- Thai chicken.
0:22:56 > 0:22:58Club sandwich.
0:22:58 > 0:22:59Green salad.
0:22:59 > 0:23:00Bean salad.
0:23:01 > 0:23:03Thanks, friend.
0:23:05 > 0:23:08- You got two.- I can't give it back, can I?
0:23:09 > 0:23:13- See you soon. - Yeah, thanks a lot, friend.
0:23:13 > 0:23:16- Is that enough. Will that get you through?- Yeah.
0:23:16 > 0:23:19Are you sure? If not, I will be along in the Strand in a bit.
0:23:19 > 0:23:24- HE RECITES:- Life is one and singular As is the ever-constant all
0:23:24 > 0:23:30To break or damage any bit Will be the way I fall.
0:23:30 > 0:23:33I must learn to share with I and it's ego I must drop
0:23:33 > 0:23:39Or peace will never rule on earth And wars will never stop.
0:23:39 > 0:23:41- Do you have crayfish?- No.
0:23:42 > 0:23:46We make the future, I and I That ego tries to take
0:23:46 > 0:23:48Stealing and deceiving
0:23:48 > 0:23:50What looks like give is just a fake...
0:23:50 > 0:23:51Chicken?
0:23:51 > 0:23:53HE LAUGHS
0:23:53 > 0:23:56- Thank you very much.- It's a pleasure.
0:23:56 > 0:24:00My life is about trying to make that world a more beautiful place.
0:24:00 > 0:24:03Living for the love of life.
0:24:03 > 0:24:06I don't earn money. I don't claim.
0:24:06 > 0:24:07I don't have any income.
0:24:07 > 0:24:10But every now and then someone will give me some pennies
0:24:10 > 0:24:13for some tobacco or I find a fiver blowing down the street.
0:24:13 > 0:24:17The only bit of me that's actually me
0:24:17 > 0:24:22that I can claim ownership of is consciousness
0:24:22 > 0:24:23within this physical body,
0:24:23 > 0:24:28and the consciousness within the physical body has no physical space.
0:24:28 > 0:24:30It doesn't physically...
0:24:30 > 0:24:31MECHANICAL SQUEAL
0:24:31 > 0:24:33HE LAUGHS
0:24:33 > 0:24:35Doesn't physically exist.
0:25:03 > 0:25:05Why haven't they put you into, um...
0:25:05 > 0:25:09I've tried, I've tried, I've tried every angle known to man.
0:25:09 > 0:25:13I cannot get a roof over my fucking head. No local connection.
0:25:13 > 0:25:17I was in Brighton. Brighton fucking sent me to London
0:25:17 > 0:25:19and now London want to send me to Timbuk-fucking-tu.
0:25:19 > 0:25:21Know what I mean? Hang on a minute.
0:25:21 > 0:25:23I'm talking to these people, right?
0:25:23 > 0:25:26So, where the fuck do I go then?
0:25:26 > 0:25:27Where is my connection?
0:25:27 > 0:25:30I ain't fucking got one. I've buried every cunt.
0:25:30 > 0:25:32Everyone's dead. Do you know what I mean?
0:25:32 > 0:25:35They're all fucking brown bread. The lot of them.
0:25:47 > 0:25:49Fuck you. No.
0:25:49 > 0:25:50No!
0:25:55 > 0:25:57The deepest corner of the deepest, darkest night
0:25:57 > 0:26:01There's a little fella that blinks With his eyes wide open...
0:26:01 > 0:26:02No, what is it?
0:26:03 > 0:26:07In the darkest, darkest corner In the darkest, darkest nightmare...
0:26:07 > 0:26:10In the darkest, darkest corner In the darkest, darkest nightmare...
0:26:10 > 0:26:13- When you toss and turn... - When you toss and turn...
0:26:13 > 0:26:16- Your eyes blink when they're shut... - Your eyes blink when they're shut...
0:26:16 > 0:26:18I'm the little cunt in the corner watching.
0:26:18 > 0:26:21He's the little cunt in the corner that's watching you.
0:26:24 > 0:26:26Nature, it is.
0:26:26 > 0:26:28This is when it begins...
0:26:28 > 0:26:30What begins?
0:26:30 > 0:26:33Life begins.
0:26:33 > 0:26:35This is when it gets hard work.
0:26:39 > 0:26:41Beat up, kicked up, spat on,
0:26:41 > 0:26:44pissed on, set on fire.
0:26:44 > 0:26:46This is when it begins.
0:26:46 > 0:26:48This is the weary part of time.
0:27:07 > 0:27:10And so how much do you get on benefits?
0:27:10 > 0:27:13I think it is just a bit over £60.
0:27:17 > 0:27:20And you pay for your ticket on the bus, don't you?
0:27:20 > 0:27:23Oh, yes, I've got an Oyster card somewhere.
0:27:23 > 0:27:25I hope I've got an Oyster card somewhere.
0:27:25 > 0:27:26I have an oyster card!
0:27:26 > 0:27:30I don't want to sort of give up, throw myself down on the ground.
0:27:30 > 0:27:35One little bit of self respect I can hang on to.
0:27:35 > 0:27:37Possibly at an enormous cost.
0:27:48 > 0:27:51ANNOUNCEMENT: Green Park, Constitution Hill.
0:27:54 > 0:27:56Hyde Park Corner station.
0:28:00 > 0:28:03To Putney Heath.
0:28:05 > 0:28:07Eden Street.
0:28:24 > 0:28:30I'd fallen on hard times and of course Christmas was coming
0:28:30 > 0:28:32and I moved into an emergency winter shelter.
0:28:32 > 0:28:37That...was very awful, too.
0:28:37 > 0:28:41In the first place, they allowed dogs which means that the...
0:28:41 > 0:28:43It was a sort of office building.
0:28:43 > 0:28:47And they just put beds in office rooms.
0:28:47 > 0:28:52But they allowed people with dogs in and that meant there was dog shit
0:28:52 > 0:28:54all over the corridors and staircases.
0:28:54 > 0:28:58And then you had to share a room and my roommate,
0:28:58 > 0:29:01who was a very long-established tramp,
0:29:01 > 0:29:04just pissed on the floor in the middle of the night.
0:29:04 > 0:29:10I allowed one night as an aberration, but the second night he pissed on the floor it was too much.
0:29:10 > 0:29:12I couldn't stay for the third.
0:29:18 > 0:29:22So that was how I ended up sleeping out in the snow.
0:29:38 > 0:29:41Welcome to the Strand, the loony bin.
0:29:41 > 0:29:43We just had a really nice fight
0:29:43 > 0:29:47but it got a bit gruesome when someone had their face cut up.
0:29:47 > 0:29:49- And you've had a drink. - I haven't had one drop.
0:29:49 > 0:29:51I don't drink, I'm sober as a judge.
0:29:56 > 0:29:58So the hand out came early tonight?
0:29:58 > 0:30:01No, we went to the shop round the corner.
0:30:01 > 0:30:04- They gave them to you? - No, we got them out the bin.
0:30:04 > 0:30:06Oh.
0:30:06 > 0:30:09Hey, this guy's got a prawn cocktail.
0:30:09 > 0:30:11He's got two prawn cocktails.
0:30:11 > 0:30:13I mean, I never got a prawn cocktail.
0:30:13 > 0:30:17He dropped them off around the corner about half an hour ago.
0:30:17 > 0:30:20I mean, how much does that cost, about £6.50?
0:30:20 > 0:30:23- Do you eat quite well on the streets?- Oh, yeah.
0:30:23 > 0:30:26Very well. Food is the least of our problems.
0:30:29 > 0:30:31My computer has been hacked.
0:30:31 > 0:30:34They took files out and put files in.
0:30:34 > 0:30:37Their intention was to put blood diamonds in my suitcases.
0:30:37 > 0:30:40I flew to Vancouver without my suitcases,
0:30:40 > 0:30:42just the clothes on my back.
0:30:42 > 0:30:47For that reason. When I got to Vancouver the guy says, customs,
0:30:47 > 0:30:50"Where are your suitcases?" I said, "I didn't bring any,
0:30:50 > 0:30:52"and you guys are waiting for me, right?
0:30:52 > 0:30:56"I'm supposed to have diamonds. Did you have an anonymous report?"
0:30:57 > 0:31:03They managed to leave enough debt with the company in Brazil
0:31:03 > 0:31:04- that... - SHOUTING
0:31:08 > 0:31:10It's going to kick off tonight.
0:31:10 > 0:31:14- You stay one end and... - I'm not scared of nobody.
0:31:14 > 0:31:16Do you think it's about food?
0:31:16 > 0:31:19Well, of course it is. It's about food and tobacco.
0:31:19 > 0:31:23Unfortunately, people haven't learned yet now to love each other.
0:31:23 > 0:31:27Yeah, and we're all stupid but, you know, if there's not enough food
0:31:27 > 0:31:28to go around, what do we do?
0:31:28 > 0:31:33You know? I like the way you act so smart when you were kicking off the other day...
0:31:33 > 0:31:35All right, just calm down, come on.
0:31:35 > 0:31:38When you were kicking off and wanted to kill everybody.
0:31:38 > 0:31:39All right, come this way.
0:31:39 > 0:31:42You didn't get the whole story there without being
0:31:42 > 0:31:45in the street with these orangutans bouncing around.
0:31:45 > 0:31:46It's, you heard what the guy said.
0:31:46 > 0:31:48"Your story is huge, get money for it."
0:31:48 > 0:31:53It's blood diamonds, it's... it's wickedness, it's evil.
0:31:53 > 0:31:57- I want Tom Hanks to play my part in the film and I want Dan Brown to write the book.
0:31:59 > 0:32:03Messy's no the worst. It is a mess. Pure mess.
0:32:06 > 0:32:07What?
0:32:07 > 0:32:10What the matter, Jean? Have you sorted her out?
0:32:10 > 0:32:13She's not a full shilling. Allow it, I allow it. You know.
0:32:13 > 0:32:16HE RAPS: On TV, commercial artist So I keep spitting my face
0:32:16 > 0:32:17I don't even want my face to be seen
0:32:17 > 0:32:19I keep screaming this and it's my dream to get there
0:32:19 > 0:32:21Anywhere but here.
0:32:21 > 0:32:23All those that are fundamentalists and say...
0:32:23 > 0:32:25- They should be shot. - It's not right, is it?
0:32:25 > 0:32:27He's throwing food on the floor.
0:32:27 > 0:32:28Guns and nuclear bombs, yeah.
0:32:28 > 0:32:32I could name so guns - LS50, AK47, shotgun, handgun, Desert Eagle,
0:32:32 > 0:32:35- a machine gun, .22 rifle... - Are you filming?
0:32:35 > 0:32:36It's disgusting.
0:32:36 > 0:32:37Hold Tight.
0:32:37 > 0:32:39HE BEATBOXES
0:32:39 > 0:32:43What has happened? Why do you look so smart?
0:32:43 > 0:32:47I've got off the street, I'm in a hostel now.
0:32:47 > 0:32:50Just come down to see friends and that and...
0:32:50 > 0:32:53I mean, I'm in full-time work now so...
0:32:53 > 0:32:55Where do you work, Ken?
0:32:55 > 0:32:59I'm at Queens Hotel doing kitchen portering.
0:32:59 > 0:33:02And let's see your watch and your lovely...
0:33:02 > 0:33:05There it's upside down but...
0:33:05 > 0:33:07You look like quite the man there.
0:33:08 > 0:33:10Yeah, he's a high flyer now.
0:33:10 > 0:33:12Ken, yeah, he is - look at him.
0:33:12 > 0:33:15Hey, you're welcome to me old bed.
0:33:15 > 0:33:18I'm getting fucked off with picking up rubbish.
0:33:18 > 0:33:24Everybody explain to everybody else in every language that there is,
0:33:24 > 0:33:27don't leave any rubbish or I won't give you any food
0:33:27 > 0:33:29to leave rubbish with.
0:33:29 > 0:33:32Yeah?
0:33:32 > 0:33:34Well, explain it to everybody.
0:33:34 > 0:33:37Is there anybody... Does everybody understand?
0:33:37 > 0:33:40Raise your hand if you understand what I just said.
0:33:40 > 0:33:42- Fuck you.- Thank you.
0:33:44 > 0:33:47- We'll give it a bash. - Cheese and pickle?
0:33:47 > 0:33:50- Yes.- Ham & Cheese.
0:33:51 > 0:33:53Brie and Tomato.
0:33:53 > 0:33:55Chicken Caesar?
0:33:55 > 0:34:02Understand that I'll do it, I'm going through it and I'll keep going until there's nothing left...
0:34:02 > 0:34:03GLASS SMASHES
0:34:03 > 0:34:06Scottish roast beef and horseradish.
0:34:06 > 0:34:10Ham and cheese...
0:34:19 > 0:34:24I'm not standing up, just tell him to leave me alone.
0:34:24 > 0:34:26No. I'm not standing up.
0:34:28 > 0:34:30HE SHOUTS
0:34:30 > 0:34:31Wagh!
0:34:31 > 0:34:33Bill, behave yourself.
0:34:35 > 0:34:38Bill, Bill, you're making it worse.
0:34:43 > 0:34:47Oh, Christ. I told him, I told him. I told him.
0:34:52 > 0:34:54To them, that's one off the street.
0:34:57 > 0:35:00This is what the police was waiting for.
0:35:00 > 0:35:05And they're all playing right into their bloody well hands.
0:35:05 > 0:35:07All the bloody time.
0:35:18 > 0:35:21It's like you got two societies. You got the normal human society
0:35:21 > 0:35:23and then you got the sub-human society
0:35:23 > 0:35:28and when you're on the street, it's different because people will just ignore you.
0:35:28 > 0:35:31But then London... London is, erm... It's a selfish place.
0:35:51 > 0:35:56I have a friend who's been living in Parliament Square for the last five years.
0:35:56 > 0:35:58I'm tent-sitting this week.
0:35:58 > 0:36:02She's set me up with all the home comforts.
0:36:02 > 0:36:03He says.
0:36:05 > 0:36:11We can have a campaign, we can have a campaign which is targeted by this government,
0:36:11 > 0:36:14which really stands up for trying to save real people's lives.
0:36:14 > 0:36:18We can have hypocrites that deal in drugs that can walk away
0:36:18 > 0:36:21from their campaign whenever they feel like it.
0:36:21 > 0:36:24And they don't mind state violence being used on people.
0:36:24 > 0:36:27We can all have a jolly good smile. We cannot look at them in the eye...
0:36:27 > 0:36:30I'm afraid I talk to policemen the same way as I talk to you,
0:36:30 > 0:36:32the same way as I talk to any other friend.
0:36:32 > 0:36:34Which is hopefully to benefit everything.
0:36:34 > 0:36:36The man's an imposter.
0:36:37 > 0:36:42He's no more a peace... peace campaigner than Mr Tony Blair.
0:36:42 > 0:36:43He works for the police.
0:36:43 > 0:36:46He's a collaborator. This is all a front.
0:36:46 > 0:36:50He just comes along here and uses it as a crash pad.
0:36:50 > 0:36:54And he peddles drugs, and the police give him the drugs
0:36:54 > 0:36:56and they're very happy with him.
0:36:56 > 0:36:59And he's a great friend of Inspector BLEEP,
0:36:59 > 0:37:04one of the nasty ones who helped put me on crutches. It's nice, isn't it?
0:37:04 > 0:37:07We're peace... My names Brian Hoar, you might have heard of me.
0:37:07 > 0:37:10We're peace campaigners. We've been here for eight years.
0:37:10 > 0:37:15That corrupt government uses the police to try to destroy us.
0:37:15 > 0:37:18They've dragged that lady off 33 times.
0:37:18 > 0:37:2133 times. No law.
0:37:21 > 0:37:23Just drag her off, violently.
0:37:23 > 0:37:27This one here, he wants to be great friends with the one Inspector BLEEP
0:37:27 > 0:37:30who dragged her off, who dragged me off.
0:37:30 > 0:37:33It's a disgrace.
0:37:33 > 0:37:34Shame on you.
0:37:43 > 0:37:49Unfortunately, it's difficult to make friends with people that don't want to make friends.
0:37:49 > 0:37:54And if we see this world as split into friends and enemies
0:37:54 > 0:37:58we're stuck in this problem where we create enemies.
0:37:58 > 0:38:04And if we see, actually - life and death.
0:38:04 > 0:38:06Then if you're on the side of life,
0:38:06 > 0:38:09you're on the same side.
0:38:09 > 0:38:12And we've got to try and all look at it that way.
0:38:12 > 0:38:15But it's sometimes a bit difficult with neighbours.
0:38:21 > 0:38:24ANNOUNCEMENT: 156 to Vauxhall.
0:38:29 > 0:38:31Grosvenor Gardens.
0:39:07 > 0:39:11N38 to Walthamstow Central.
0:39:17 > 0:39:19Hello?
0:39:22 > 0:39:25ANNOUNCEMENT: This bus terminates here.
0:39:25 > 0:39:27Please take all your belongings with you.
0:39:27 > 0:39:30PEOPLE CHAT IN BACKGROUND
0:39:34 > 0:39:36KNOCKING
0:39:39 > 0:39:41Wakey, wakey. Rise and shine.
0:40:08 > 0:40:11So, Ricky, sometimes you're looking for things.
0:40:11 > 0:40:14- Yeah.- Yeah, and what do you do?
0:40:15 > 0:40:18I'm looking for...
0:40:18 > 0:40:20dog ends...
0:40:20 > 0:40:23Thank you.
0:40:23 > 0:40:24I'm looking for this, dog ends.
0:40:24 > 0:40:26I have good, good...
0:40:26 > 0:40:30Me have money, me have everything, yeah.
0:40:30 > 0:40:32Where did you get the money?
0:40:32 > 0:40:35Uh, because I move in yesterday in the...
0:40:38 > 0:40:41..in the street and tell him,
0:40:41 > 0:40:47tell over there, tell everybody, people, "Change, please."
0:40:47 > 0:40:49- Yes.- And have money.
0:41:14 > 0:41:16This is my park.
0:41:16 > 0:41:17It's your park?
0:41:17 > 0:41:21Yeah. Every day, every time.
0:41:21 > 0:41:23Coming every day.
0:41:23 > 0:41:27People looking for me. What are you doing all the day?
0:41:27 > 0:41:29Sleep.
0:41:29 > 0:41:32Quiet sleep, you know, our home.
0:41:32 > 0:41:33Because it's not our home.
0:41:33 > 0:41:36- What is that?- This is for...
0:41:36 > 0:41:38- Aftershave?- Yeah.
0:41:40 > 0:41:42That's very nice. Did you buy it?
0:41:42 > 0:41:44- Where did you get that?- In the skip.
0:41:44 > 0:41:47- You found it in the skip? - Yeah, in the skip.
0:41:48 > 0:41:51- It's very nice.- It's very nice.
0:41:53 > 0:41:55Just waiting, waiting,
0:41:55 > 0:41:57and waiting.
0:42:00 > 0:42:02I don't know...
0:42:03 > 0:42:06..what me...
0:42:06 > 0:42:11doing over there in the fucking...no, fucking...
0:42:11 > 0:42:13fucking England.
0:42:27 > 0:42:30- This is my friend.- You are his friend from Warsaw?
0:42:30 > 0:42:35Yeah, yeah we meet from Warsaw and together come to UK.
0:42:35 > 0:42:39What was his work when you were in Warsaw?
0:43:17 > 0:43:21He say he very like you.
0:43:22 > 0:43:24He very like you, like friends.
0:43:36 > 0:43:39Before, Grizzly said that he was a sniper.
0:43:40 > 0:43:46- Sorry?- He said the other time we were filming, he said he was a sniper.
0:43:46 > 0:43:47Him!
0:43:51 > 0:43:53Sorry.
0:43:53 > 0:43:56HE TALKS OWN LANGUAGE
0:43:56 > 0:43:58Yes, yes.
0:43:58 > 0:44:00Yes.
0:44:05 > 0:44:06He say yes.
0:44:16 > 0:44:21You know how sniper he can be? I show you.
0:44:25 > 0:44:27Yes.
0:44:27 > 0:44:29This is a sniper.
0:44:29 > 0:44:31Leave me.
0:44:32 > 0:44:34Please...
0:44:34 > 0:44:38I drink...you...
0:44:41 > 0:44:42HE LAUGHS Sniper!
0:44:42 > 0:44:46Is a sniper?!
0:44:46 > 0:44:48GRIZZLY TALKS OWN LANGUAGE
0:44:54 > 0:45:00In army, my friend...service in a commando.
0:45:00 > 0:45:03In commando. Only be a cook.
0:45:04 > 0:45:05Oh, he was a cook.
0:45:46 > 0:45:48What happened on your arm?
0:45:52 > 0:45:54Here. What happened to you?
0:45:59 > 0:46:00And here?
0:46:09 > 0:46:10And here?
0:46:36 > 0:46:39You want your mum to come and get you?
0:46:53 > 0:46:55What happened to you there?
0:47:27 > 0:47:28You've got a flat now.
0:47:28 > 0:47:31Yeah, with no electric.
0:47:31 > 0:47:34Moved in there last night, ain't got no key meter.
0:47:34 > 0:47:37And when I moved in there, there was no furniture in there.
0:47:37 > 0:47:40The furniture's in there now but there's still no electric.
0:47:40 > 0:47:43There's no key meter. It's £61 for an emergency.
0:47:43 > 0:47:48I phoned the landlord up this morning who said he'll try and do something today.
0:47:48 > 0:47:50But whether he does or not is another thing.
0:47:50 > 0:47:52Most of the things I've done myself,
0:47:52 > 0:47:55I got myself off the alcohol do you know what I mean?
0:47:55 > 0:47:58I put myself into counselling, do you know what I mean?
0:47:58 > 0:48:01Just so to calm myself down as I suffer from anger management a lot.
0:48:01 > 0:48:04Yeah, the wife wants to come over at the weekend.
0:48:15 > 0:48:20- Hello, missus. - Hello, missus. In the bin, please.
0:48:28 > 0:48:30Oh, here you are, I'll give you something to read.
0:48:30 > 0:48:34- It's a hostel license agreement. - Yeah.
0:48:34 > 0:48:36All the rules and regulations.
0:48:36 > 0:48:40It's like a fucking prison, I might as well go back there.
0:48:46 > 0:48:48Stick! Stick!
0:49:03 > 0:49:05Whoops.
0:49:06 > 0:49:08There we are.
0:49:08 > 0:49:10- Ah, going to sit down then? - That was very dramatic.
0:49:10 > 0:49:14I've been in all the hostels you can think of in London.
0:49:14 > 0:49:17I can never settle in a hostel.
0:49:17 > 0:49:21I can't even settle in my own flat never mind a fucking hostel.
0:49:21 > 0:49:22Have you had a flat?
0:49:22 > 0:49:24Only in Blackpool.
0:49:24 > 0:49:26That was...
0:49:26 > 0:49:28- your partner, right?- Mm.
0:49:32 > 0:49:35She done me over big time.
0:49:39 > 0:49:41Fucking Liverpool bastard.
0:49:43 > 0:49:44Ah, well.
0:49:46 > 0:49:49I was back in Blackpool infirmary.
0:49:51 > 0:49:56It's this Scotch nurse, I remember her, this Scottish nurse says,
0:49:56 > 0:49:59"Jean, why do you let her keep doing this to you?"
0:49:59 > 0:50:01I said, "Cos I'm a punch bag.
0:50:02 > 0:50:04"She enjoys hitting me."
0:50:07 > 0:50:12There was one night I was nearly at death's door,
0:50:12 > 0:50:16I had tubes up my nose, the heart machine on me.
0:50:16 > 0:50:18- Fucking...- Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know.
0:50:18 > 0:50:21I was like fucking...like a robot.
0:50:21 > 0:50:23And I still didn't fetch no charges.
0:50:35 > 0:50:38LAUGHING Oh, that's funny.
0:50:39 > 0:50:42You can see the funny side of it.
0:50:42 > 0:50:45No, you don't see the funny side of it, you don't.
0:50:45 > 0:50:47You don't see the funny side of it.
0:50:47 > 0:50:49Not being in hospital all the time. No way.
0:50:55 > 0:50:57Oh, no. I don't want to cry.
0:51:09 > 0:51:12Stay down till you get home.
0:51:32 > 0:51:34Basically I just lost my job.
0:51:36 > 0:51:40It was sort of a knock-on effect - losing your job, then...
0:51:40 > 0:51:41couldn't find another one.
0:51:43 > 0:51:46And lost my flat and everything else,
0:51:46 > 0:51:51so decided to come to London and start again.
0:51:55 > 0:51:56And what job did you do?
0:51:56 > 0:51:59I was a website designer.
0:51:59 > 0:52:03Meeting other homeless people, they give you good tips on
0:52:03 > 0:52:07where's good to sleep, where you're not going to get moved on.
0:52:07 > 0:52:09These are the guys I stay with.
0:52:10 > 0:52:12..which is like a dormitory hostel.
0:52:12 > 0:52:16And I was in there for about three days, but it was so mental in there
0:52:16 > 0:52:17I wanted to come back out here.
0:52:17 > 0:52:20Some hostels are just crazy.
0:52:22 > 0:52:25I was more stressed in the hostel than I was out here.
0:52:25 > 0:52:28Sleeping rough ain't actually the bad thing about it.
0:52:28 > 0:52:31That's not what I found, not now I'm with this lot.
0:52:31 > 0:52:34It don't, that's...that's not a chore.
0:52:35 > 0:52:39It's the day times, finding something to do and...
0:52:39 > 0:52:42- It's shutting everything out, isn't it?- Yeah, that's it.
0:52:42 > 0:52:45You seem to go from one queue to the next, that's all you do,
0:52:45 > 0:52:48wait and wait and wait around, that's all you do.
0:52:48 > 0:52:52If you're a single bloke and English, you don't get no help.
0:52:52 > 0:52:54Nothing.
0:52:54 > 0:52:58You'll find every homeless person on the street will say...
0:52:58 > 0:53:01if they're English they'll say, "It's the fucking foreigners."
0:53:01 > 0:53:05I love London but...
0:53:05 > 0:53:08this has opened my eyes to how many
0:53:08 > 0:53:11eastern Europeans there are in here.
0:53:14 > 0:53:17I was working front of house in a hotel in Little Venice.
0:53:17 > 0:53:19A posh hotel, five-star hotel.
0:53:21 > 0:53:23What happened to your job?
0:53:23 > 0:53:25Lost it. Lost it.
0:53:27 > 0:53:30I'm homeless, aren't I? What's going to happen?
0:53:30 > 0:53:34I got sent home once for bad hygiene. Sent me home.
0:53:34 > 0:53:36Because I was dirty and smelly.
0:53:36 > 0:53:40Fucking hell, I couldn't say I was living on the street, could I?
0:53:40 > 0:53:42It's a five-star hotel.
0:53:42 > 0:53:46"Yeah, I live on the street, sorry I ain't shaved and had a wash."
0:53:53 > 0:53:56The more you get pissed, the more you don't want to work.
0:53:56 > 0:53:59Why should we? What's the point?
0:53:59 > 0:54:01There's no point at all.
0:54:01 > 0:54:07I'll be here, I've got a feeling I'm going to be here in 20 years' time, on the street.
0:54:07 > 0:54:08But with crutches...
0:54:10 > 0:54:12..bad back, fucked hips.
0:54:12 > 0:54:15Sleeping on a cold floor every day.
0:54:15 > 0:54:16Getting pissed on every day.
0:54:19 > 0:54:22But I'm English. Onwards and upwards.
0:54:43 > 0:54:45Why are you drinking?
0:54:45 > 0:54:48How does the drinking help you?
0:54:48 > 0:54:53At the moment, this problem, this street,
0:54:53 > 0:54:54is very cold,
0:54:56 > 0:54:59very, very cold, this rain.
0:54:59 > 0:55:02No drinking,
0:55:02 > 0:55:05no life.
0:55:20 > 0:55:22Why are you doing that?
0:55:22 > 0:55:27For change, please. For change, this cup.
0:55:27 > 0:55:29In the change, please.
0:55:29 > 0:55:31And if you break it, it's better?
0:55:31 > 0:55:33- Yeah, it's better.- Why?
0:55:33 > 0:55:35Because...
0:55:35 > 0:55:37I don't know why I tell you.
0:55:37 > 0:55:40It's better because people feel sorry for you.
0:55:40 > 0:55:42Yeah, yeah, yeah.
0:57:15 > 0:57:18- So, how are you doing? - Yeah, all right, not too bad.
0:57:18 > 0:57:21- Is this your neighbourhood? - Not really. I hate this area.
0:57:21 > 0:57:23- Really?- Yeah.
0:57:25 > 0:57:28So Andy, when we last interviewed you,
0:57:28 > 0:57:33you'd got a job and a place and you were feeling pretty good.
0:57:33 > 0:57:34So what happened?
0:57:36 > 0:57:38Just worked half a day.
0:57:38 > 0:57:40Do you know what I mean?
0:57:40 > 0:57:44Basically what it was, it was my wedding anniversary the day I started.
0:57:44 > 0:57:48Arranged everything to meet my wife... Straight down, yeah.
0:57:48 > 0:57:52Arranged to meet my wife and then she fucking, excuse my language,
0:57:52 > 0:57:55- screwed me over.- Oh, Andy.- So now I've been back on the street.
0:57:55 > 0:57:59I've been arrested five times since I come out of prison in April.
0:57:59 > 0:58:01And each time for the same thing?
0:58:01 > 0:58:03Erm...drinking, yeah.
0:58:04 > 0:58:07- Are you lonely?- Yeah, do you know what I mean?
0:58:07 > 0:58:11The hardest thing with splitting up from my wife is taking rejection.
0:58:11 > 0:58:15It's normally me splits up before they do. Do you know what I mean?
0:58:15 > 0:58:17I'd rather hurt them before they hurt me.
0:58:17 > 0:58:19- And she hurt me before I could get a chance.- Hm.
0:58:24 > 0:58:26They put me out here, I'm miles away from anybody.
0:58:26 > 0:58:30I asked them not to put me out here, do you know what I mean?
0:58:30 > 0:58:32And they just stuck me out here.
0:58:32 > 0:58:34- And you're in Wood Green now, right? - Yeah.
0:58:53 > 0:58:59And they think cos we lived on the street, they can just stick us anywhere, do you know what I mean?
0:58:59 > 0:59:00Right, this is the bathroom.
0:59:02 > 0:59:05It's a toilet and a shower in there.
0:59:07 > 0:59:11It works out £693, or summat.
0:59:11 > 0:59:16So basically, when you're in this room and you don't know anybody, you're just sitting here...
0:59:16 > 0:59:18Sitting here drinking, smoking,
0:59:18 > 0:59:20do you know what I mean?
0:59:28 > 0:59:32What were you thinking when you put that on your head, though?
0:59:32 > 0:59:35I thought I'd just pee my wife off, but it ain't really.
0:59:35 > 0:59:37It's cutting your nose off to spite your face.
0:59:37 > 0:59:39But I just went and done it.
0:59:39 > 0:59:43Just sat here one day and just drunk and went, "Fuck it"
0:59:43 > 0:59:47and duh, duh, duh. Done my hand, do you know what I mean?
0:59:47 > 0:59:50I just thought it would be my way of getting back at her.
0:59:50 > 0:59:53Every time I phone her, I threaten her and all that,
0:59:53 > 0:59:56say I really want to kill her, I want to hurt her bad.
0:59:56 > 0:59:59But I never would, you know? And the thing is, she knows that.
0:59:59 > 1:00:02So you mainly do things to yourself, don't you?
1:00:02 > 1:00:04Self harming. Do you know what I mean?
1:00:04 > 1:00:05Cut all my face up before.
1:00:05 > 1:00:08There was a point when I was in Trafalgar Square, I tried to cut
1:00:08 > 1:00:12my throat with a piece of glass because I couldn't take it no more.
1:00:12 > 1:00:14And do you know why you do that, Andy?
1:00:17 > 1:00:19Don't know, no, not really.
1:00:19 > 1:00:22It's just how I felt at the time, do you know what I mean?
1:00:22 > 1:00:24Yeah.
1:00:24 > 1:00:28I remember you saying that your dad used to hit you when you were little.
1:00:28 > 1:00:32- Yeah. - Do you think it's maybe connected?
1:00:32 > 1:00:37Well, I used to hurt myself before he even try to hit me, do you know what I mean?
1:00:37 > 1:00:39So that's where it probably stemmed from.
1:00:40 > 1:00:44- What did he used to do to you?- Just used to punch me and stuff like that.
1:00:44 > 1:00:49When he found out I used to steal, he used to grab my fist and try and punch it through the wall.
1:00:49 > 1:00:51So, like, try and break my knuckles or whatever.
1:00:51 > 1:00:54When I was young, I stole £50, I think I was eight or nine,
1:00:54 > 1:00:58I was living in Charlton, I stole £50 and I wanted to leave home then.
1:00:58 > 1:01:00I wanted to go to America with £50.
1:01:00 > 1:01:02I was only young, I didn't know what to do.
1:01:04 > 1:01:08And do you think the same thing happened to your dad when he was a kid?
1:01:08 > 1:01:12I know my old man used to get beaten up by my grandfather, yeah.
1:01:12 > 1:01:13Got hit by my grandfather.
1:01:28 > 1:01:32Until everybody has one, keep quiet.
1:01:34 > 1:01:38- Thai chicken? Noodles and cashew? - Yes, please.
1:01:38 > 1:01:40Club sandwich?
1:01:40 > 1:01:42Lemon, chicken, black pepper on rye?
1:01:44 > 1:01:47- I was on the streets for seven years. - And where did you sleep?
1:01:47 > 1:01:51I slept on the Strand here, in a doorway down there.
1:01:51 > 1:01:53Erm, it was quite hard.
1:01:53 > 1:01:55Very, very hard.
1:01:55 > 1:01:57You can get stick off a lot of people.
1:01:57 > 1:02:03You know, like, people can spit at you when they're walking past, they can be really horrible to you.
1:02:03 > 1:02:05I've had people give me a kicking on the streets.
1:02:05 > 1:02:09You know what I mean? Just for being homeless, so it can be quite hard.
1:02:09 > 1:02:13- Did you have a difficult time as a child?- Yeah.
1:02:13 > 1:02:14What happened to you?
1:02:14 > 1:02:16I was abused.
1:02:16 > 1:02:19And then it messes with your head.
1:02:19 > 1:02:23Do you think you ever recover from anything like that?
1:02:23 > 1:02:25No.
1:02:25 > 1:02:27Does it still plague you now?
1:02:27 > 1:02:31Yes. It affects relationships and stuff.
1:02:31 > 1:02:33And trust. I don't trust anyone.
1:02:48 > 1:02:54Sometimes I go from St Pancras down to Bedford and back.
1:02:54 > 1:02:57Takes about an hour, hour and a half.
1:02:57 > 1:03:00All depends if you catch a slow train or a fast train.
1:03:00 > 1:03:06I normally try and catch a slow train because the more time I spend on the train,
1:03:06 > 1:03:12then sometimes it's more rest I can get, and the better it is for me in the morning.
1:03:18 > 1:03:20What was your childhood like, Matthew?
1:03:20 > 1:03:21Not very good.
1:03:21 > 1:03:26I didn't really have a good one because I went into care from a very young age.
1:03:26 > 1:03:28I didn't like it at all.
1:03:28 > 1:03:33They treat you... some members of staff treat you like dirt.
1:03:33 > 1:03:39I had one member of staff who used to literally just launch me from room to room and get away with it.
1:03:42 > 1:03:45But you've just got to know what to do.
1:03:45 > 1:03:47I put complaints in all the time.
1:03:47 > 1:03:53If you don't learn quickly, then you will die.
1:03:53 > 1:03:57This year just over 200 people have died on the streets.
1:03:57 > 1:03:59Which is a lot of people to die.
1:04:10 > 1:04:13I would come here quite a few times.
1:04:13 > 1:04:17I normally just go into the train station and just sit in there for a little bit.
1:04:20 > 1:04:22Leicester is the next train.
1:04:22 > 1:04:25Nine minutes past one in the morning.
1:04:29 > 1:04:31So where will you go now? To Leicester?
1:04:31 > 1:04:32No.
1:04:32 > 1:04:35Because I don't know where Leicester is
1:04:35 > 1:04:39and I wouldn't risk going somewhere where I don't know.
1:04:39 > 1:04:45You see coming here, I know that there's a train going back.
1:04:45 > 1:04:49So, from Leicester, I wouldn't know what's what.
1:04:49 > 1:04:50Yeah.
1:04:52 > 1:04:55And normally at this point, I normally just...
1:04:55 > 1:04:58sit over there
1:04:58 > 1:05:03and then sit against the radiator and fall asleep.
1:05:03 > 1:05:06Sometimes me and my mate sometimes sit there,
1:05:06 > 1:05:08or we sit here.
1:05:08 > 1:05:11In that respect, it's not too bad.
1:05:32 > 1:05:35And I show you where I sleep, yeah?
1:05:37 > 1:05:39OK.
1:05:41 > 1:05:43Over there, because it's hot.
1:05:45 > 1:05:51Very good place because very hot. Very nice.
1:07:08 > 1:07:12So, Jean, something happened to you a long time ago?
1:07:15 > 1:07:17Not found it yet?
1:07:17 > 1:07:20Where have you put it?
1:07:20 > 1:07:24- Sorry?- Something happened to you a long time ago...
1:07:24 > 1:07:25Baby, I forgot.
1:07:27 > 1:07:29I've got no nuts for you, I forgot.
1:07:29 > 1:07:31Sorry. Next time.
1:07:33 > 1:07:39So after all this, what happened to you when you were 12, what has been the result of it?
1:07:39 > 1:07:42It'll always stay with me until the day I die.
1:07:48 > 1:07:51Why do you think I jump underneath vehicles?
1:07:51 > 1:07:53Just so that one would fucking hit me.
1:07:57 > 1:08:01When you get raped, you see the pictures what they do to you.
1:08:01 > 1:08:04You hear the voices. They don't let you go.
1:08:04 > 1:08:07When I am dead, they will leave me.
1:08:07 > 1:08:09Because they've got what they want.
1:08:11 > 1:08:14And these voices, where do they live?
1:08:14 > 1:08:17They're inside you for the rest of your life until you kill yourself.
1:08:17 > 1:08:18Gis a light.
1:08:21 > 1:08:25It's either that or live with them for the rest of your life until you do die.
1:08:25 > 1:08:27That's why I can't wait until I'm dead.
1:08:28 > 1:08:30And what do they say to you?
1:08:31 > 1:08:36If I knew she wanted me to talk about this...
1:08:46 > 1:08:47To hurt people.
1:08:51 > 1:08:53Hurt people who want to help me.
1:08:58 > 1:09:00And what do they tell you to do to yourself?
1:09:13 > 1:09:16They just tell me to do damage to myself.
1:09:16 > 1:09:20If I do damage to myself, they leave me alone for a bit and then they start again.
1:09:30 > 1:09:33At the moment, they're asleep.
1:09:45 > 1:09:49But basically, they're the three men that did that to you when you were a little girl?
1:09:49 > 1:09:51Four men.
1:09:52 > 1:09:54Hello, beautiful.
1:09:56 > 1:10:00Not going to say hello? No?
1:10:06 > 1:10:09Since I was 12, I've seen them.
1:10:09 > 1:10:13I see them, I hear them talking to me.
1:10:13 > 1:10:15And believe it or not, they're starting to wake up.
1:11:35 > 1:11:36Ah, it was a good life.
1:11:36 > 1:11:38Getting raped.
1:11:39 > 1:11:41You what?
1:11:42 > 1:11:45Sorry.
1:11:45 > 1:11:47That wasn't me, that was them saying it.
1:11:47 > 1:11:49- They said that?- Hm.
1:11:59 > 1:12:04- What did they say to you? - It was a great life, raping me.
1:12:10 > 1:12:12I guess that's why I like getting raped.
1:12:13 > 1:12:15Cos they enjoy it.
1:12:17 > 1:12:19I just can't wait to get raped again.
1:12:19 > 1:12:22Oh, don't say that, Jean.
1:12:22 > 1:12:23I'm telling you.
1:12:26 > 1:12:27The quicker the better.
1:12:29 > 1:12:33If I get raped again, it keeps them lot happy.
1:12:33 > 1:12:37Maybe I might feel something.
1:12:37 > 1:12:39Until then, I don't feel nothing.
1:12:43 > 1:12:45I mean, this is not my life.
1:12:45 > 1:12:48This is their life.
1:12:48 > 1:12:49The life that you're living now?
1:12:49 > 1:12:52It's not my life, I haven't got a life.
1:12:52 > 1:12:54My life's with them.
1:12:56 > 1:12:58- Sounds crazy, doesn't it?- Yes.
1:12:58 > 1:12:59Yeah.
1:13:01 > 1:13:03Oh, brother, I can't win.
1:13:32 > 1:13:35Tea for the camera woman...
1:13:35 > 1:13:37And what is this place?
1:13:37 > 1:13:41Well, it's my new studio flat.
1:13:41 > 1:13:44Moved in last Thursday.
1:13:44 > 1:13:46Had to go through this...
1:13:46 > 1:13:51whole process of getting depressed and the landlord to throw me out because
1:13:51 > 1:13:55I failed to claim benefits and failed to pay rent.
1:13:55 > 1:14:00And take a very long time to recover from the whole process.
1:14:00 > 1:14:02Hm.
1:14:02 > 1:14:07And what do you hope now, I mean if... Do you feel that you're in
1:14:07 > 1:14:11a position to look forward to a different kind of life?
1:14:11 > 1:14:13Umm...
1:14:16 > 1:14:19It's, you know,
1:14:19 > 1:14:22very hard.
1:14:22 > 1:14:25When I came to London and started work, it seemed
1:14:25 > 1:14:31that I entered this male menopause, this Reginald Perrin situation.
1:14:31 > 1:14:32Being frustrated by work.
1:14:32 > 1:14:35Just right from the start, I could never cope.
1:14:41 > 1:14:45I drink the Holsten's now, 5%, I'm down to 5%. That's not bad.
1:14:45 > 1:14:49I mean, I'm, I reckon I'm doing a self-detox, know what I'm saying?
1:14:49 > 1:14:51Know what I mean?
1:14:51 > 1:14:54I could go to a clinic, complain to a doctor, I could do this and that,
1:14:54 > 1:14:59you know, at the end of the day, you need a bit of backbone, you got to make a decision for yourself.
1:14:59 > 1:15:01You're not in the doorway of Karen Millen any more.
1:15:01 > 1:15:02No, do you know what, I'm not.
1:15:02 > 1:15:08Let me introduce you, you open the front door, there's your little kitchen,
1:15:08 > 1:15:11all your appliances, double bed, bay window,
1:15:11 > 1:15:16and in here is your separate shower and hand basin and toilet.
1:15:16 > 1:15:19All done, do you know what I mean? Fantastic.
1:15:19 > 1:15:22I want to get my life back, do you know what I mean?
1:15:22 > 1:15:24This is not a career move.
1:15:24 > 1:15:26In a sleeping bag. Do you know what I'm saying?
1:15:26 > 1:15:30Bit of fun, you know, during the summer you can sort of laugh it off, but...
1:15:30 > 1:15:36weather's starting to turn now and I tell you, I done the snow in Brighton in January, and that was not funny.
1:15:36 > 1:15:38- I'm telling you.- Bye.
1:15:38 > 1:15:40Cheers, guys.
1:15:40 > 1:15:43See you later.
1:15:43 > 1:15:44See you soon.
1:15:52 > 1:15:56Got a place, haven't we? Both ended up in the same building.
1:15:56 > 1:15:57Yeah?
1:15:57 > 1:15:59Keys.
1:15:59 > 1:16:03- But it's all good. I've got a job now as well.- Really?
1:16:03 > 1:16:07- Started last week. Working in a bar.- Yeah.
1:16:07 > 1:16:10Which is cool, and you just got one, ain't ya?
1:16:10 > 1:16:12Yeah, good money.
1:16:12 > 1:16:13£9 an hour.
1:16:13 > 1:16:16- You're kidding!- No, I'm not kidding.
1:16:16 > 1:16:18Do I lie? I don't tell lies.
1:16:18 > 1:16:21- He's going to take me out for Christmas dinner.- Yeah, I am, yeah.
1:16:21 > 1:16:23Here we are.
1:16:42 > 1:16:44Not very tidy at the moment.
1:16:44 > 1:16:46So, it's a room.
1:16:46 > 1:16:49We're proof that it can be done.
1:16:49 > 1:16:54Without being brash. And I don't mean any disrespect to anyone,
1:16:54 > 1:16:58but it wasn't that difficult,
1:16:58 > 1:17:02- and there is a lot of help out there.- Yeah.
1:17:02 > 1:17:03Take care.
1:17:18 > 1:17:21- So are you back on the street, then?- Yeah.
1:17:21 > 1:17:24So, Ken, how many times have you been in and out over the years?
1:17:24 > 1:17:26In and out, all together...
1:17:30 > 1:17:32About 25 year, all together.
1:17:32 > 1:17:34- Yeah, on and off.- On and off.
1:17:34 > 1:17:39I tried settling in hostels, tried going back home
1:17:39 > 1:17:41but I just, I just can't settle.
1:17:41 > 1:17:46I need that sort of support from health workers
1:17:46 > 1:17:52and, uh, social workers, really.
1:17:58 > 1:18:02At least I've got you though, Uncle Ken. At least you're my uncle.
1:18:02 > 1:18:04You know you've got good friends round you.
1:18:04 > 1:18:08So, Ken, who is this?
1:18:08 > 1:18:11It's me niece, Mystique.
1:18:11 > 1:18:14I was searching throughout the whole of this country
1:18:14 > 1:18:17just to find my baby uncle, you know.
1:18:17 > 1:18:18He's the only family I got left.
1:18:18 > 1:18:23- I was getting chucked down stairs, I was getting kicked...- By whom?
1:18:23 > 1:18:27By my ex boyfriend, and he loved beating me up, he was an alcoholic.
1:18:27 > 1:18:30A terrible, terrible alcoholic.
1:18:30 > 1:18:32I didn't know what to do.
1:18:32 > 1:18:35I just thought, I can't stay here, I've got to go
1:18:35 > 1:18:37up to my uncle and look after... and he's got to look after me.
1:18:37 > 1:18:39So I've looked after him and everything.
1:18:39 > 1:18:43We got to turn down here now, this is the way we got to go.
1:18:43 > 1:18:46See this, and this is how cold it is.
1:18:46 > 1:18:52I was in the Royal Engineers, King Fusiliers area, I was looking after the Queen all the time.
1:18:52 > 1:18:56I was acting sergeant, and I was everything I could have been.
1:18:56 > 1:19:01When I was young, I didn't know where my uncle was. I was in the army.
1:19:01 > 1:19:04I needed my uncle home, and finally I got my uncle with me.
1:19:04 > 1:19:07Ain't that right, Uncle Ken?
1:19:07 > 1:19:10- Yeah.- So were you in care, as well, as a child?
1:19:10 > 1:19:12I was in children's care.
1:19:12 > 1:19:15I was in a children's home in Herefordshire.
1:19:15 > 1:19:19And it was quite horrendous to be in children's care.
1:19:19 > 1:19:22I've had a lot of bullying from them and all.
1:19:22 > 1:19:25Never again.
1:19:25 > 1:19:29And you weren't in care when you were a child, were you, Ken?
1:19:29 > 1:19:31- I was, yeah.- You were in care?
1:19:31 > 1:19:35I were in care since I were six month old.
1:19:35 > 1:19:40That's one box... I'll have that space.
1:19:40 > 1:19:43This is where we sleep.
1:19:43 > 1:19:49We have no trouble at all. Uh, we keep ourselves to ourselves
1:19:49 > 1:19:54and we'll clean all our mess up if there is any.
1:19:54 > 1:19:57That underneath...
1:19:59 > 1:20:01So Mystique's mum was homeless as well.
1:20:01 > 1:20:04Yeah, yeah, till she got herself right.
1:20:04 > 1:20:06She was only 13 when she was on the streets.
1:20:06 > 1:20:08I know.
1:20:08 > 1:20:11Just leave that for now, love.
1:20:11 > 1:20:13Raspberry nougat.
1:20:13 > 1:20:16Hang on, why is it called coconut if it's got no nuts? Uh!
1:20:16 > 1:20:22I don't know...cos it looked like a nut when it were all done.
1:20:29 > 1:20:32Hm. Are you happy to have him back?
1:20:32 > 1:20:35Sometimes, yeah, do you know what I mean?
1:20:35 > 1:20:38For the company, but sometimes it's stressful because
1:20:38 > 1:20:42sometimes I wonder why...if I was too selfish by taking him back.
1:20:42 > 1:20:48Because sometimes...this old place is too small for him, not really a garden, do you know what I mean.
1:20:48 > 1:20:49It's unfair on him.
1:20:49 > 1:20:57I've been stressed out the last week or so, smashed my phone up, and smashed up the cupboard on the door.
1:20:59 > 1:21:01Do you know what I mean?
1:21:01 > 1:21:04Tried to cut the tattoo out of my head as well.
1:21:04 > 1:21:06With a razor blade.
1:21:06 > 1:21:08Didn't do a good job because it's still there.
1:21:11 > 1:21:15Does it make you feel better when you do that?
1:21:15 > 1:21:20In some respects it does, yeah, but it just, it's like a, a memento just
1:21:20 > 1:21:23to say like, well, you won't do that again, do you know what I mean.
1:21:23 > 1:21:26But at least you've still got a roof over your head.
1:21:26 > 1:21:28Yeah, but this roof is really stressing me out.
1:21:28 > 1:21:33Being out here on my own again is just like I was saying, I just want to pack up and just go.
1:21:33 > 1:21:36Just leave everything, just take my dog and my clothes and go again.
1:21:36 > 1:21:39I'd rather go back to the street. I'm just stressing out here now.
1:22:02 > 1:22:04Wow!
1:22:04 > 1:22:05Engaged.
1:22:07 > 1:22:09- Uh?- Engaged to me.
1:22:09 > 1:22:11- What?- Engaged to me.
1:22:15 > 1:22:16Ow, my bone!
1:22:27 > 1:22:29She's staying silent.
1:22:29 > 1:22:31She's hidden it. She's being quiet.
1:22:33 > 1:22:35Don't blame her.
1:22:35 > 1:22:39- Jean, are you not supposed to kiss him now?- I have to get up again now.
1:22:51 > 1:22:53You're blushing!
1:22:53 > 1:22:55Oh, God. I need a drink.
1:23:04 > 1:23:06MUSIC AND CHANTING
1:23:35 > 1:23:39So your niece actually stole your money? Mystique?
1:23:39 > 1:23:41Yeah, Mystique stole it.
1:23:41 > 1:23:46I said, OK, you can stay with me till following day, we'll sort out a flat.
1:23:46 > 1:23:48I had the money ready.
1:23:48 > 1:23:50£200.
1:23:50 > 1:23:55I thought, right, I'll put it away in my secret pocket in my sleeping bag.
1:23:57 > 1:24:04Got up to go to the toilet, I didn't realise at the time. By the time I come back, she'd gone.
1:24:04 > 1:24:08So I checked my sleeping bag and she'd took the money as well.
1:24:14 > 1:24:19She has to fight her own battles now cos I'm not fighting them for her any more,
1:24:19 > 1:24:21not after what she did to me.
1:24:21 > 1:24:24No. So...
1:24:36 > 1:24:38I've only got another year to go.
1:24:38 > 1:24:45- Until what happens?- Well, I came to London and I said that what I want is I want to realise paradise.
1:24:45 > 1:24:51- Yeah.- And if the race that I belong to hasn't got round to starting within three years of me doing
1:24:51 > 1:24:56my utmost to do it as beautifully and peacefully as I can, then fuck 'em.
1:24:56 > 1:25:00- I shall go out and do it by other means.- What sort of means?
1:25:00 > 1:25:04Well, if I haven't succeeded in, by peaceful means,
1:25:04 > 1:25:08trying to bring about change such as getting people to willingly give up
1:25:08 > 1:25:16fossil-fuel use, then I shall go out of my way to make sure that there's no fossil fuels for people to use.
1:25:16 > 1:25:18And I don't mind if I get locked up because,
1:25:18 > 1:25:23you know, the worst that can happen to me is I can get locked in jail.
1:25:23 > 1:25:26Have a room, a bed and three meals a day.
1:25:26 > 1:25:30- And that's the worst that can be thrown at me.- Yeah.
1:25:30 > 1:25:33There's one lemon cheesecake,
1:25:33 > 1:25:34lemon cheesecake.
1:25:34 > 1:25:36Ham.
1:25:37 > 1:25:42Hands up who hasn't got anything, there's two chocolate fudge.
1:25:42 > 1:25:45Has anybody else not got one?
1:25:45 > 1:25:47Do us a favour.
1:25:47 > 1:25:53When you sit down up the street and eat your food, pick your rubbish up and put it in the bin.
1:25:53 > 1:25:57If I find a pile in the corner like I did yesterday,
1:25:57 > 1:26:01I'll screw the rubbish into a ball and stick it up your rectum. Yeah?
1:26:02 > 1:26:07Straight up. It goes in the bin, not on the street.
1:26:24 > 1:26:27I bet he's been on the heat again.
1:26:30 > 1:26:33But, Jean, you're still in the hostel, right?
1:26:41 > 1:26:43But you're not sleeping out, Jean?
1:26:45 > 1:26:46Off and on, yes.
1:26:48 > 1:26:50I love this. What are you on about?
1:26:50 > 1:26:52It's really cold!
1:26:54 > 1:26:56Jean, what about your engagement?
1:26:56 > 1:26:58She's asking that again.
1:27:01 > 1:27:03I'm not getting involved in this.
1:27:06 > 1:27:07Sorry, Penny.
1:27:07 > 1:27:10It's all right, it's just voices, but go on.
1:27:10 > 1:27:13So what's this about...
1:27:13 > 1:27:17- you're not engaged any more. No ring.- No. He had that back ages ago.
1:27:21 > 1:27:24Have you seen John, Jean?
1:28:18 > 1:28:19Good morning, Ken.
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