0:00:03 > 0:00:04It matters to me very much,
0:00:04 > 0:00:07that you people should be able to look someone in the eye,
0:00:07 > 0:00:11and smile, and say, "Good morning," or, "Good afternoon."
0:00:11 > 0:00:16A boys' boarding school is a particularly British institution,
0:00:16 > 0:00:17envied and copied the world over.
0:00:19 > 0:00:21It matters to me
0:00:21 > 0:00:24that you should not speak to people with your hands in your pockets.
0:00:24 > 0:00:27In 1979, the BBC made a series following life in one of these
0:00:27 > 0:00:30elite boys' public schools, Radley College.
0:00:32 > 0:00:35It matters to me that you've got polished shoes,
0:00:35 > 0:00:38and I wonder how many of you have clean fingernails?
0:00:38 > 0:00:42More than 30 years on, we track down some of the boys who appeared,
0:00:42 > 0:00:45to find out what sort of men they became.
0:00:45 > 0:00:49These tiny little things make something that last, because
0:00:49 > 0:00:55you come to school for one thing, to acquire the right habits for life.
0:01:08 > 0:01:10Ah, Donald. Congratulations!
0:01:10 > 0:01:13You've won the top scholarship at Radley. Top?
0:01:13 > 0:01:18Top, yes. Now, I think that probably calls for some kind of celebration,
0:01:18 > 0:01:21so I'm not going to let you have more than a glass of cider,
0:01:21 > 0:01:23because you've got a hockey match tomorrow.
0:01:23 > 0:01:25Give you that much.
0:01:25 > 0:01:28I knew I was bright from the age of about ten,
0:01:28 > 0:01:32and so I did the scholarship exam to get into Radley,
0:01:32 > 0:01:36and that's what you see in the TV series.
0:01:36 > 0:01:41And to be told I'd got the top scholarship, I was delighted.
0:01:42 > 0:01:45Dad? ON PHONE: Hello, my lad.
0:01:45 > 0:01:48You know that I've won this top scholarship.
0:01:48 > 0:01:51Oh, darling! I have, yeah.
0:01:51 > 0:01:54The top scholarship? Yep.
0:01:54 > 0:01:56To Radley? Yep. Full fees.
0:01:56 > 0:02:00My father was a doctor, so my parents could have afforded it,
0:02:00 > 0:02:03but this would have been amazing.
0:02:03 > 0:02:06It meant school was free, apart from laundry.
0:02:06 > 0:02:09DAD ON PHONE: Oh, many congratulations!
0:02:09 > 0:02:12As a result of that, you're not marked, but you're
0:02:12 > 0:02:16identified as the top scholar, so you're expected to achieve.
0:02:17 > 0:02:20It's kind of, "Well, Donald'll do it, no problem."
0:02:20 > 0:02:24And, I tell you, it wasn't no problem.
0:02:24 > 0:02:27BELL RINGS LOUDLY
0:02:35 > 0:02:39The boys featured began at Radley at the age of 13,
0:02:39 > 0:02:42but most had already boarded at prep school from the age of eight.
0:02:45 > 0:02:46ORIGINAL VOICEOVER: JMH Lovegrove
0:02:46 > 0:02:49is one of this term's crop of stigs, or new boys.
0:02:49 > 0:02:54He's about to take up residence in his new home, C Social.
0:02:54 > 0:02:57As to why they decided to send me to boarding school,
0:02:57 > 0:03:01I have no idea, other than that was probably what you did with
0:03:01 > 0:03:06your children in that day and age, and in our social milieu.
0:03:06 > 0:03:07And this is Nick Dean...
0:03:07 > 0:03:11VOICEOVER: Social life in the social begins with a new boys' tea party,
0:03:11 > 0:03:14an occasion for parents to meet those who will be in loco parentis.
0:03:14 > 0:03:20It seems a strange thing to do, with hindsight, to your child,
0:03:20 > 0:03:23to send them away for so long, but you wouldn't do it, you know,
0:03:23 > 0:03:26because you hated them. Well, you might.
0:03:26 > 0:03:28But mostly you do it because you love them
0:03:28 > 0:03:31and you want them to do the best that they possibly can.
0:03:31 > 0:03:34James isn't very much for societies at all.
0:03:34 > 0:03:36Oh, well, that's all right. Does he row?
0:03:36 > 0:03:38Yes. Oh, excellent! Excellent!
0:03:38 > 0:03:40THEY ALL LAUGH
0:03:40 > 0:03:42There are only two sorts of people,
0:03:42 > 0:03:43those who row and those who play cricket.
0:03:43 > 0:03:48I had boarded from the age of six, but that was in the war.
0:03:48 > 0:03:49INTERVIEWER: How did you find boarding?
0:03:49 > 0:03:53Oh, it was awful. I hated it until I was about 14.
0:03:53 > 0:03:57And by that time I'd been to... That was my third school, actually.
0:03:57 > 0:04:01So you felt you could share the experience with your own children. SHE LAUGHS
0:04:01 > 0:04:03Would you like to go in there
0:04:03 > 0:04:05and see if you can see your name anywhere?
0:04:07 > 0:04:10Right, because of what?
0:04:10 > 0:04:12SHE LAUGHS
0:04:12 > 0:04:15I think leaving a mother for any child is the hardest part
0:04:15 > 0:04:17of going away anywhere, let alone to a school
0:04:17 > 0:04:19where you're going to spend two-thirds of your year.
0:04:19 > 0:04:21That, I think, was a wrench.
0:04:21 > 0:04:24I would much rather have been at home.
0:04:24 > 0:04:28We're not a very touchy-feely, expressive family, so it was a nice,
0:04:28 > 0:04:31polite, formal peck on the cheek, "Goodbye," and then she's off.
0:04:35 > 0:04:39VOICEOVER: Radley College is five miles from Oxford, houses 600 boys
0:04:39 > 0:04:43and charges nearly ?3,000 a year for board and tuition.
0:04:43 > 0:04:45So it's safe to assume that few Radleians
0:04:45 > 0:04:48are of lowly social origins.
0:04:48 > 0:04:50Just about every single person here, wanks the whole...
0:04:50 > 0:04:53Well, not the whole time, but everybody wanks.
0:04:53 > 0:04:55Speak for yourself! Exactly, yeah.
0:04:55 > 0:04:56Everybody wanks here.
0:04:56 > 0:04:58Nobody really has any qualms about talking about it,
0:04:58 > 0:05:00"I had a wank last night," or whatever.
0:05:00 > 0:05:01"Shattered this morning."
0:05:01 > 0:05:04"You shouldn't have had a wank last night," sort of idea.
0:05:05 > 0:05:08I became famous. Apparently I said it a number of times.
0:05:10 > 0:05:12I did say it a number of times,
0:05:12 > 0:05:15but my point about saying it within the interview was...
0:05:15 > 0:05:16INTERVIEWER: Saying what?
0:05:16 > 0:05:18Saying, "wank". Saying that boys...
0:05:18 > 0:05:21I think... I haven't seen this for 35 years,
0:05:21 > 0:05:23so I think I said, you know,
0:05:23 > 0:05:28"People talk about wanking here like they talk about bread and butter."
0:05:32 > 0:05:35We were down the South of France. Definitely was, yeah.
0:05:35 > 0:05:36There's the boat.
0:05:36 > 0:05:40It was considered a huge yacht at the time. Well, it was 149 ft.
0:05:40 > 0:05:45We had 13 people, and 14 crew. Oh, look at me, wasn't I gorgeous?
0:05:45 > 0:05:47HE LAUGHS
0:05:47 > 0:05:49Yes. Yes, Mummy, yes, Mummy.
0:05:49 > 0:05:54My mother came from a very poor background, grew up in New York
0:05:54 > 0:06:00during the depression, so I know that she had it quite tough.
0:06:00 > 0:06:03She married an Englishman, a commodity broker.
0:06:03 > 0:06:05There you go.
0:06:05 > 0:06:07We grew up in a very idyllic situation.
0:06:07 > 0:06:10There was a big house and lovely holidays.
0:06:11 > 0:06:13This is the house.
0:06:13 > 0:06:14Paige is here...
0:06:16 > 0:06:20..with this big collar. I still have that dress downstairs.
0:06:22 > 0:06:25It was not a physically affectionate household.
0:06:25 > 0:06:29My parents were involved in their own world,
0:06:29 > 0:06:33so from a child's perspective, I didn't feel that closeness.
0:06:33 > 0:06:34INTERVIEWER: Why did you decide
0:06:34 > 0:06:38to send the children off to boarding school?
0:06:38 > 0:06:41Well, it's a cultural thing, I think, you know?
0:06:41 > 0:06:44Everybody that we knew's children were away at school.
0:06:44 > 0:06:48And my secretary and our gardeners
0:06:48 > 0:06:54and people like that, they sent their kids to the local schools.
0:06:54 > 0:06:56INTERVIEWER: So it was a class thing?
0:06:56 > 0:06:59Yeah, it was... It was a class thing, absolutely.
0:06:59 > 0:07:01It's a club.
0:07:01 > 0:07:05And when someone knows that you've gone to such and such a school,
0:07:05 > 0:07:06that makes you all right.
0:07:10 > 0:07:14There were some people who clearly came from very well-off backgrounds,
0:07:14 > 0:07:17and you just needed to look at the cars turning up
0:07:17 > 0:07:21at the beginning of term to see, yes, there's a fair bit of cash here.
0:07:21 > 0:07:25You sort of scanned their addresses, Paris, Monaco, Hong Kong,
0:07:25 > 0:07:32you know, Chelsea and, you know, I was North Shields.
0:07:34 > 0:07:40I was born close to Newcastle, so I'm a Geordie at heart.
0:07:40 > 0:07:42I was one of five kids.
0:07:42 > 0:07:43My father was a vicar.
0:07:43 > 0:07:46And we were moving around quite a bit and, you know,
0:07:46 > 0:07:49my parents had made a lot of sacrifices to send me to Radley.
0:07:50 > 0:07:53My first memories of school, I suppose,
0:07:53 > 0:07:56were of Priory School in Tynemouth.
0:07:57 > 0:08:00It came to the end of my first year in the junior school.
0:08:00 > 0:08:04The form master was sort of talking to everybody in the class
0:08:04 > 0:08:09about how next term they'd all be going up to the second form,
0:08:09 > 0:08:13and he said, "But Timothy's going away to boarding school.
0:08:15 > 0:08:17"And he's quite unlucky."
0:08:18 > 0:08:20And I remember thinking, "Ooh, hang on.
0:08:20 > 0:08:25"This isn't quite how I thought it was going to be."
0:08:25 > 0:08:27I think there was a degree of fear, you know?
0:08:28 > 0:08:32You're going into the unknown. There is nothing familiar.
0:08:34 > 0:08:37This is David Roper-Curzon, Salisbury Cathedral.
0:08:37 > 0:08:39Stick your things on the piano there, David.
0:08:39 > 0:08:42What do you want to do first? Um... Flute?
0:08:42 > 0:08:43Play the flute first.
0:08:47 > 0:08:51PLAYS TRADITIONAL TUNE
0:08:51 > 0:08:54VOICEOVER: In the lee of Salisbury Cathedral is the choir school,
0:08:54 > 0:08:57where the Honourable David Roper-Curzon is a chorister.
0:08:57 > 0:09:00And across the Cathedral Close is David's home.
0:09:00 > 0:09:02He is the eldest son of Lord Teynham,
0:09:02 > 0:09:05and he will ultimately be the 21st to succeed to that title.
0:09:08 > 0:09:11INTERVIEWER: What sort of family were you from?
0:09:11 > 0:09:13Chaotic, really, as far as I can remember.
0:09:13 > 0:09:16How many children did your parents have?
0:09:16 > 0:09:20Eventually ended up with ten. Five boys, five girls.
0:09:20 > 0:09:22I'm the eldest.
0:09:23 > 0:09:26Hello? Yeah, we've got the... Hello.
0:09:26 > 0:09:30We've got the BBC here. There we are. Oh, marvellous.
0:09:30 > 0:09:31You look like Mrs Ambridge.
0:09:31 > 0:09:34I've bought your mail. Oh, my God!
0:09:35 > 0:09:38INTERVIEWER: Your father being a Lord, were you a very rich family?
0:09:38 > 0:09:40No. No, no, not at all.
0:09:40 > 0:09:42No, not at all.
0:09:42 > 0:09:46I mean, I think, maybe it was obviously luckier than some.
0:09:46 > 0:09:51But there's me there in the army, in Bermuda actually.
0:09:51 > 0:09:55And then that's me and the Queen, shaking hands.
0:09:55 > 0:09:58My father never really had any money,
0:09:58 > 0:10:00and neither did his father for that matter.
0:10:00 > 0:10:02But, you know, he's the 20th in succession,
0:10:02 > 0:10:08so it goes right back to 1613, or something like that.
0:10:08 > 0:10:10I think, I suppose the first one had a bit of money,
0:10:10 > 0:10:14but then all the rest of them were pretty useless and lost it, I think.
0:10:14 > 0:10:16HE LAUGHS
0:10:16 > 0:10:19INTERVIEWER: Were finances an issue for you? Was it easy to send...?
0:10:19 > 0:10:22Of course. This whole point of getting in for a scholarship,
0:10:22 > 0:10:25you get roughly half the school bill paid.
0:10:25 > 0:10:27It's the only reason why I could go there,
0:10:27 > 0:10:30was I had a scholarship. What?
0:10:30 > 0:10:33I was telling them earlier, the only reason you could afford to send me
0:10:33 > 0:10:35there was because I got a scholarship.
0:10:35 > 0:10:38Of course, it made all the difference. With ten children,
0:10:38 > 0:10:42you've got to find the money somewhere or go to a state school.
0:10:44 > 0:10:49As is the case of... Most people who've been to public school
0:10:49 > 0:10:53themselves, they see that system as something
0:10:53 > 0:10:56they want for their children as well, and I suppose it was
0:10:56 > 0:10:58sort of tradition, really, more than anything else.
0:10:58 > 0:11:01Did he have a particular aim in mind, do you think, for you,
0:11:01 > 0:11:04of what you might become or what you might do in life?
0:11:04 > 0:11:06Oh, I'm sure he had all sorts of plans,
0:11:06 > 0:11:10but they didn't turn out the way he'd necessarily have planned them.
0:11:15 > 0:11:18You're a stig, by the way. I don't know if you knew.
0:11:18 > 0:11:19No, I didn't.
0:11:19 > 0:11:22Well, that's the name for a new boy.
0:11:22 > 0:11:26May I begin by saying how very glad I am to have you here at Radley.
0:11:26 > 0:11:31I want you people to build up one habit.
0:11:31 > 0:11:33The habit of work.
0:11:36 > 0:11:38Right, everybody here?
0:11:38 > 0:11:41The first thing you do is to stand up, I may as well tell you.
0:11:41 > 0:11:43Come along, you vile boy!
0:11:43 > 0:11:45This is your very first period at Radley College,
0:11:45 > 0:11:49one of England's greatest public schools, and you're late. Sit down.
0:11:49 > 0:11:51My first form teacher was Mr Goldsmith.
0:11:51 > 0:11:53Luckily, I only had him for a term,
0:11:53 > 0:11:55because he scared the shit out of me.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57Lovegrove.
0:11:57 > 0:12:00GMH and CCHR.
0:12:00 > 0:12:05I just wasn't expecting this full force gale that hit us
0:12:05 > 0:12:06in that first year.
0:12:06 > 0:12:08Right, number one.
0:12:08 > 0:12:10Alpha numbers. Right, that one again. One.
0:12:10 > 0:12:14Every Saturday morning there would be a Saturday morning mental, which,
0:12:14 > 0:12:18basically, was a sort of general knowledge test cum maths quiz.
0:12:18 > 0:12:19Eight.
0:12:21 > 0:12:23Two. Two.
0:12:23 > 0:12:25Two! So he would just throw numbers at you,
0:12:25 > 0:12:29random numbers and you had to keep adding them up, adding them up.
0:12:29 > 0:12:33Eight. Eight, eight, eight, eight, eight, eight. That's all.
0:12:35 > 0:12:37I don't know why they gave him
0:12:37 > 0:12:40to a bunch of new boys as their form master.
0:12:40 > 0:12:43It does seem a bit of a trial by fire.
0:12:43 > 0:12:46Maybe that was the point? Maybe that was the point.
0:12:46 > 0:12:48This is a code to be cracked.
0:12:48 > 0:12:51The answer is QPR v Ipswich.
0:12:51 > 0:12:55He was quite an eccentric teacher, but he made you learn.
0:12:55 > 0:12:59Now, I'd always found maths easy, but I think he recognised who
0:12:59 > 0:13:01was good at maths, and he would push you.
0:13:01 > 0:13:04No! You've got to have it written down, you infernal boy!
0:13:04 > 0:13:08There were certain boys who'd want to be top. I was one of them.
0:13:08 > 0:13:10Therefore, if you think you're in the top two or three,
0:13:10 > 0:13:16and you come fifth, that's motivation enough to work harder.
0:13:16 > 0:13:19Everybody know exactly what's expected of them? Right-oh.
0:13:19 > 0:13:21Good luck. Now you may go.
0:13:22 > 0:13:25Academic excellence was something they strove for
0:13:25 > 0:13:28and pushed you quite hard towards.
0:13:28 > 0:13:33But sporting prowess was very, very highly valued indeed.
0:13:33 > 0:13:35If you were a sporting, you know, legend,
0:13:35 > 0:13:37you would be in the hall of fame for all time.
0:13:37 > 0:13:40Were you a sporting legend? No.
0:13:40 > 0:13:44So, who was in the hall of fame in your year?
0:13:44 > 0:13:45Oh, well...
0:13:45 > 0:13:48Donald Payne was actually a great all-rounder.
0:13:48 > 0:13:49He was very smart
0:13:49 > 0:13:52and he was a good sportsman on almost every...in every game.
0:13:52 > 0:13:54Bastard!
0:13:56 > 0:13:58What sort of boy were you?
0:13:58 > 0:14:02Really loud.
0:14:02 > 0:14:06Loud, busy, noisy, but underneath it, very shy.
0:14:08 > 0:14:13I was in the first team for rugby, I was in the first team for hockey.
0:14:13 > 0:14:16I just think, amongst your peers, in your year group,
0:14:16 > 0:14:21if you're in the first team for something, people looked up to you.
0:14:22 > 0:14:24You're going to be good at something
0:14:24 > 0:14:28which was going to make your life easier, then be good at sport,
0:14:28 > 0:14:32and then you would be given a sort of a relatively easy ride.
0:14:32 > 0:14:36Anyway, let's change the subject slightly. Let's talk about women.
0:14:36 > 0:14:38What? Women.
0:14:38 > 0:14:39What? Who?
0:14:39 > 0:14:40Oh, sorry.
0:14:40 > 0:14:42You haven't got any here.
0:14:42 > 0:14:46No. Well, only in the biology books, and...
0:14:46 > 0:14:49LAUGHTER
0:14:50 > 0:14:53You don't know how to deal with girls or with women, and
0:14:53 > 0:14:58I think that we idealised them, and, at the same time, we have absolutely
0:14:58 > 0:15:03no context for communicating with them or dealing with them
0:15:03 > 0:15:07or understanding them, and preparing us for the rest of our lives.
0:15:09 > 0:15:13The school chaplain decided to have Scottish dancing classes.
0:15:13 > 0:15:18And of course, we joined straightaway, not because we had any desire
0:15:18 > 0:15:21to do reels, but we thought, opportunity to meet women.
0:15:27 > 0:15:30There were the sort of bunch for whom probably
0:15:30 > 0:15:33the highlight of the term would be the sort of school dances.
0:15:35 > 0:15:36People like?
0:15:36 > 0:15:38Oh, well, Paige Newmark, the school stud.
0:15:43 > 0:15:48We used to get instructions before these dances about how to behave.
0:15:48 > 0:15:50Both hands must be visible at all times.
0:15:50 > 0:15:53Why was that?
0:15:53 > 0:15:55Well, so you're not inside girls' shirts,
0:15:55 > 0:15:58or your hands down their whatever.
0:15:58 > 0:16:03Remaining in the vertical position at all times.
0:16:03 > 0:16:06In other words, no lying down.
0:16:06 > 0:16:09And always have one foot on the ground.
0:16:12 > 0:16:14And how did you deal with the dances? Were you successful?
0:16:14 > 0:16:17I didn't really go to them. I was quite shy.
0:16:17 > 0:16:19Well, if you ended up going to it,
0:16:19 > 0:16:22you'd probably end up standing at the bar, talking to your mates.
0:16:22 > 0:16:23Oh, Tim Huxley.
0:16:23 > 0:16:26Yeah, Tim was always a bit... I remember him
0:16:26 > 0:16:28as being sort of slightly awkward.
0:16:31 > 0:16:34He had a regional accent. Was it a Yorkshire accent?
0:16:34 > 0:16:37Which, again, made him, you know, in terms of the sort of pecking order
0:16:37 > 0:16:40of school, would certainly put him down the list.
0:16:44 > 0:16:46I wouldn't describe it as tribal,
0:16:46 > 0:16:48but you certainly sort of divide yourself up.
0:16:48 > 0:16:50And you walk into the dining hall at Radley,
0:16:50 > 0:16:54and, you know, there'll be tables of, you know, yeah, the cool dudes.
0:16:56 > 0:16:59I must confess, I haven't worked over hard,
0:16:59 > 0:17:02although, I mean, this last week, I mean, since half term,
0:17:02 > 0:17:04I have been actually pulling my finger out rather a lot.
0:17:07 > 0:17:0820 to. OK, get up.
0:17:11 > 0:17:14Rupert Gather is hoping to get into Oxford.
0:17:18 > 0:17:22I rather sort of fancy myself as the cultured intellectual,
0:17:22 > 0:17:24although I'm not particularly intellectual.
0:17:24 > 0:17:26I want to get to Oxford, OK?
0:17:26 > 0:17:28I want to go to Balliol. And it's really tough.
0:17:28 > 0:17:32I mean, Balliol's meant to be sort of the ivory tower of the colleges.
0:17:32 > 0:17:35You know, I mean, I couldn't face the thought of being stuck
0:17:35 > 0:17:38away somewhere in Rotherham, you know?
0:17:38 > 0:17:43I think, I guess the hardest bit about self-confidence is that
0:17:43 > 0:17:46there's a very thin line between self-confidence and arrogance.
0:17:48 > 0:17:53Rupert was incredibly gregarious, outgoing person.
0:17:53 > 0:17:56And he was so annoyingly intelligent, he made it look easy.
0:17:56 > 0:18:01Which I found really irritating because I really had to struggle.
0:18:01 > 0:18:05I had a lot of trouble last year, you know, with one thing
0:18:05 > 0:18:12and another, and, you know, I nearly got seen to station, sort of thing.
0:18:14 > 0:18:18It's obviously much more hierarchical than a mixed environment would be.
0:18:18 > 0:18:22But to survive, everyone develops their own strategies.
0:18:22 > 0:18:26Mine involved, sort of, I think, quite a lot of humour
0:18:26 > 0:18:29and joie de vivre, as the teachers might have said.
0:18:32 > 0:18:35Rupert, full of good will, good heart,
0:18:35 > 0:18:39but not always with the stamina to see something through to the end.
0:18:39 > 0:18:44And just how much work he has really done I wouldn't be prepared to say,
0:18:44 > 0:18:48and I think that might become exposed in an Oxbridge interview.
0:18:51 > 0:18:54I wanted to go to Oxford, but I needed a good warden's report,
0:18:54 > 0:18:58and I recognised that I had a bumpy road through the school,
0:18:58 > 0:19:04and therefore I needed to do something exceptional.
0:19:04 > 0:19:08Noted that the library was completely unloved,
0:19:08 > 0:19:12and so I said, you know, "We can do something about this."
0:19:12 > 0:19:14I mean, frankly, I've got a lot to gain,
0:19:14 > 0:19:18I mean, in a mercenary way, if I really butter him up.
0:19:18 > 0:19:19Bye. Rupert, what can I do?
0:19:19 > 0:19:22Sir, I just brought some proposals about the library.
0:19:22 > 0:19:25I don't know if anyone else mentioned anything about it.
0:19:25 > 0:19:28He has, actually. Let me just...
0:19:28 > 0:19:31I mean, did it work? Did the warden give you a good report?
0:19:31 > 0:19:34I have no idea whether the warden gave me a good report.
0:19:34 > 0:19:38If I asked him he probably wouldn't tell me. I don't know.
0:19:38 > 0:19:42But was I confident that he would give me a good report?
0:19:42 > 0:19:43Yes, I was.
0:19:45 > 0:19:48I think I agree with just about everything in here.
0:19:48 > 0:19:51Anything that could, as you say here, revitalise the library,
0:19:51 > 0:19:53must be a good thing. Yeah.
0:19:53 > 0:19:56Where did that confidence come from?
0:19:56 > 0:19:58Was that something that school had given you?
0:19:58 > 0:20:00Or was it something you had had already?
0:20:00 > 0:20:04I think the schooling process gives you confidence,
0:20:04 > 0:20:08and, obviously, family background and parents.
0:20:08 > 0:20:10I think it's probably innate, actually,
0:20:10 > 0:20:14I'm not even sure you learn it, do you? I don't know.
0:20:14 > 0:20:17This is Tim Huxley for the Workers Revolutionary Party.
0:20:17 > 0:20:18CHEERING
0:20:21 > 0:20:23Seasoned comrades!
0:20:25 > 0:20:28Britain has seen the major political parties
0:20:28 > 0:20:34and our political system as a whole drag it down for years.
0:20:34 > 0:20:37When, fine, OK, I was secretary of the Debating Society,
0:20:37 > 0:20:41and so somebody has to put the extreme left-wing view.
0:20:41 > 0:20:46But certainly at the time I thought there's something
0:20:46 > 0:20:48not quite just here.
0:20:48 > 0:20:52A lot of people seem to have a sense of entitlement.
0:20:52 > 0:20:56The time is ripe for revolution!
0:20:56 > 0:20:59CHANTING: Shut up!
0:20:59 > 0:21:01But you wanted to shake things up a bit?
0:21:01 > 0:21:06I wanted to make people more aware of what the rest of the world was.
0:21:11 > 0:21:14There was the time of the miners' strike.
0:21:14 > 0:21:18There was a time when the shipyards were closing in the North East.
0:21:20 > 0:21:23We were living in a pretty rough part of Newcastle, and you'd sort of
0:21:23 > 0:21:29watch the regional news, and it'd be about people losing their jobs.
0:21:31 > 0:21:35When I went away to Radley at the beginning of each term, I mean,
0:21:35 > 0:21:39you know, I was leaving behind this very different environment.
0:21:46 > 0:21:49This is St John's Vicarage, which was my home
0:21:49 > 0:21:51I used to come back home to from Radley,
0:21:51 > 0:21:55when my father was vicar of St John's Church in Percy Main.
0:21:55 > 0:21:58A vicarage is very much a working house.
0:21:58 > 0:22:00You've always got people coming in, going out.
0:22:00 > 0:22:04It was a very happy place to be, actually.
0:22:04 > 0:22:05Were you a close family?
0:22:05 > 0:22:08Oh, very. I think we all looked after each other.
0:22:10 > 0:22:14First term at Radley didn't go very well, really.
0:22:14 > 0:22:18I do remember when my school report that December came through and
0:22:18 > 0:22:25Dennis wrote, "Coming bottom of the bottom form is not a very
0:22:25 > 0:22:28"auspicious start to his Radley career."
0:22:28 > 0:22:31I remember sitting there with my father and we talked about this.
0:22:31 > 0:22:34Obviously he wasn't very happy,
0:22:34 > 0:22:36and I certainly felt I had let people down.
0:22:38 > 0:22:42So I went back there to justify the investment they made in me
0:22:42 > 0:22:44but also to prove something to myself.
0:22:44 > 0:22:48That I could be competitive with all these other people there.
0:22:56 > 0:22:59Going away to boarding school was pretty grim in many respects,
0:22:59 > 0:23:02cos you're exposed all the time.
0:23:02 > 0:23:06You're not going home to Mum every night.
0:23:06 > 0:23:10You deal with it by building up a camaraderie with
0:23:10 > 0:23:12the people around you, but at the same time,
0:23:12 > 0:23:16more than anything, I think you actually become quite defensive.
0:23:16 > 0:23:17You can't show your weaknesses.
0:23:17 > 0:23:24And you do sort of shut down certain aspects of your emotions and feelings.
0:23:24 > 0:23:27You're less open. You don't show emotion.
0:23:27 > 0:23:30I don't show emotion. People still criticise me of that today.
0:23:30 > 0:23:32Really?
0:23:32 > 0:23:35Why don't you show emotion if you're in a place like that?
0:23:36 > 0:23:38Cos it's a sign of weakness.
0:23:38 > 0:23:40What would happen if you show weakness?
0:23:43 > 0:23:46I suppose somebody might exploit it.
0:23:52 > 0:23:54Cos I was the top scholar,
0:23:54 > 0:23:57there's always an expectation that you will do well.
0:23:57 > 0:24:01For the first few years that was fine, but with each passing year,
0:24:01 > 0:24:07keeping up that standard became harder and harder.
0:24:07 > 0:24:09And it was also not just academically,
0:24:09 > 0:24:12because it also happened in the sporting area as well,
0:24:12 > 0:24:14cos in addition to the academic stuff,
0:24:14 > 0:24:17I was also doing very well at sport, particularly athletics.
0:24:19 > 0:24:22So, again, there was another pressure on top of that,
0:24:22 > 0:24:26cos I was winning races, supposedly without any effort.
0:24:26 > 0:24:28And then with each passing year, everyone goes, "Oh, yeah.
0:24:28 > 0:24:32"Who's running? Oh, Donald's running. Of course, he'll win."
0:24:32 > 0:24:34And it just gets harder and harder.
0:24:35 > 0:24:40I was just so desperate to do well, and therefore pushing myself.
0:24:40 > 0:24:42Everything became a huge effort,
0:24:42 > 0:24:45and I'm not the sort of person that would have mentioned that to anyone,
0:24:45 > 0:24:48so it would have all have stayed inside.
0:24:49 > 0:24:53One of the things I noticed is I was drifting off in lessons.
0:24:53 > 0:24:56I could sit in a lesson and 20 minutes would go by,
0:24:56 > 0:24:59and I'd suddenly go, "Ooh, what have I missed?"
0:25:00 > 0:25:03I became a bit obsessive compulsive, I think, where we
0:25:03 > 0:25:06were doing rugby training, and I was playing fly-half,
0:25:06 > 0:25:09and the fly-half stands behind the scrum, and there came a point
0:25:09 > 0:25:14where I couldn't walk past anything at school without imagining,
0:25:14 > 0:25:17"Oh, the corner of that building's the scrum, so where would I stand?"
0:25:17 > 0:25:19So I would go from one classroom to the next,
0:25:19 > 0:25:23a journey which would take a minute, and I would take five minutes,
0:25:23 > 0:25:27cos every time I walked past a tree or a building or a bin,
0:25:27 > 0:25:29I'd have to line myself up against that bin.
0:25:29 > 0:25:31It's frightening to think about that now.
0:25:31 > 0:25:35And, again, I was terrified of telling anyone that.
0:25:35 > 0:25:39Did you? No. Did your parents know how you were feeling?
0:25:39 > 0:25:40No.
0:25:40 > 0:25:44They knew I was withdrawn, and they knew, I think,
0:25:44 > 0:25:50they remember saying, "You haven't said anything for about a year."
0:25:52 > 0:25:55Can you all move rather quickly, please? Can you all hurry up?
0:25:55 > 0:26:00I'd always been quite a polite, reserved child, ready to sort of
0:26:00 > 0:26:05fit in and try and be helpful, but I've never been a great joiner-in.
0:26:05 > 0:26:07What? Sorry, but, yeah.
0:26:07 > 0:26:10I had always been into sort of science fiction, fantasy,
0:26:10 > 0:26:11comics, the esoteric stuff,
0:26:11 > 0:26:16but at Radley you weren't allowed comics and, you know, anything
0:26:16 > 0:26:21that wasn't really proper mainstream stuff wasn't really approved of.
0:26:21 > 0:26:24Good night, everybody. See you all tomorrow.
0:26:24 > 0:26:25It was a sort of, you know,
0:26:25 > 0:26:28it was something you had to keep to yourself a bit.
0:26:33 > 0:26:36These are very scurrilous comics and magazines I drew.
0:26:36 > 0:26:38They'd get passed around the dormitory at night.
0:26:38 > 0:26:41I probably just kept them in my desk. No-one would have checked.
0:26:41 > 0:26:44You can see what kind of level of humour we're dealing with here.
0:26:44 > 0:26:45The title is C-Men.
0:26:45 > 0:26:49I would just make jokes about teachers and pupils and...
0:26:49 > 0:26:55Oh, yes, that was when the housemaster's dog got caught being pleasured by another teacher's dog.
0:26:55 > 0:26:58This is someone doing horrible things to various members of staff.
0:27:01 > 0:27:03It was probably quite a useful escape valve.
0:27:03 > 0:27:07It was something that you could enjoy without thinking that it
0:27:07 > 0:27:10was connected to the school, so it was a sort of way out.
0:27:11 > 0:27:15It's something that was a reminder of home, because I could do that
0:27:15 > 0:27:18sort of stuff at home without, you know, getting into trouble.
0:27:23 > 0:27:26You're the people who are the leaders of the music.
0:27:26 > 0:27:29You're the chiefs, if you like. The others are the Indians.
0:27:29 > 0:27:32You'll probably find the Indians are very keen, but they're
0:27:32 > 0:27:36looking to the music scholars to give them a lead and set an example.
0:27:41 > 0:27:42And is that what happened?
0:27:42 > 0:27:45No, not really. Not in my case, anyway.
0:27:47 > 0:27:49I like to think I had tried as hard as I could
0:27:49 > 0:27:52but I dare say I was a bit lazy on occasions.
0:27:52 > 0:27:58My school reports often ended, "Could have done better," kind of thing,
0:27:58 > 0:28:03so I think academically speaking,
0:28:03 > 0:28:08I wasn't certainly a high achiever.
0:28:10 > 0:28:15I got to a stage, I suppose, when I was about 16.
0:28:15 > 0:28:19I got fed up being told what to do all the time, I suppose, and so I left.
0:28:19 > 0:28:23Yeah. And then went to the Salisbury Tech.
0:28:23 > 0:28:27That must have not been that usual amongst your Radley contemporaries?
0:28:27 > 0:28:31No, I mean, there was hardly anybody did that, but that was just me.
0:28:31 > 0:28:33Mmm.
0:28:34 > 0:28:37Were you disappointed when he left Radley after all that money?
0:28:37 > 0:28:42Oh, yes, I was, because, you know, one went to a lot of trouble to send him there.
0:28:44 > 0:28:47I can't remember now what happened. He probably...
0:28:47 > 0:28:49I refused to go back. Do you remember? Yeah, well, oh, yes. Yeah.
0:28:49 > 0:28:53Well, after that you went in the army, didn't you?
0:28:53 > 0:28:56Mmm. That was a disaster, really.
0:28:56 > 0:28:58That didn't work out.
0:28:58 > 0:29:01Well, it was just terrifying, I remember that.
0:29:02 > 0:29:05And jolly hard work, yeah.
0:29:05 > 0:29:07I'd never worked so hard in my life.
0:29:07 > 0:29:10How long did he last in the army? Do you remember?
0:29:10 > 0:29:13Well, it was about two or three months, wasn't it? Yeah.
0:29:13 > 0:29:14Yes. Very little time. Yeah.
0:29:17 > 0:29:21VOICEOVER: Paige Newmark cuts a dash by driving in from a weekend at home
0:29:21 > 0:29:24with his sister and girlfriend Anthea in his own car.
0:29:24 > 0:29:26It's strictly against school rules.
0:29:26 > 0:29:29Living in a large institution like that,
0:29:29 > 0:29:31you're ruled every moment of the day.
0:29:31 > 0:29:35You know, you get up at a certain time, you're down to breakfast
0:29:35 > 0:29:39at a certain time, you have to wear your uniform in a particular way.
0:29:39 > 0:29:41And I was constantly questioning that.
0:29:41 > 0:29:46"WHY do we have to do this?" "Well, that's just the way it is."
0:29:47 > 0:29:49Yeah, I was challenging to authority.
0:29:52 > 0:29:54Now, Paige, I have it on fairly good authority,
0:29:54 > 0:29:57that you've arrived in style...
0:29:57 > 0:29:59in your own car, which has not been done in my time here,
0:29:59 > 0:30:02ever, by any other boy.
0:30:02 > 0:30:05And just strolled into our dance, as calm as you please.
0:30:05 > 0:30:06And now you plan to drive home.
0:30:06 > 0:30:07I'm sorry, sir, but...
0:30:07 > 0:30:09I mean, you just haven't got a case.
0:30:09 > 0:30:12I think I have and I think I've got it rather clearer than you.
0:30:12 > 0:30:15You haven't! And I m going to put you in my car
0:30:15 > 0:30:17and I'll take you straight home now, and Paige, your tutor's
0:30:17 > 0:30:20expecting you and you can go off to your cubicle right away.
0:30:22 > 0:30:24I was demoted from being a prefect.
0:30:25 > 0:30:30I suppose society just runs smoother if people toe the line.
0:30:39 > 0:30:40Will you please go in.
0:30:40 > 0:30:44A-levels are designed to be quite testing exams.
0:30:45 > 0:30:47I knew it was on a knife-edge.
0:30:49 > 0:30:52And I sort of suspected that I had one shot at this.
0:30:54 > 0:30:56If I didn't do English at Oxford,
0:30:56 > 0:30:59then I would have to sort of re-appraise the whole thing.
0:31:01 > 0:31:05You suddenly realise where some of the gaps are.
0:31:05 > 0:31:08I just couldn't suss that out in here.
0:31:08 > 0:31:10Not a BLEEP.
0:31:12 > 0:31:15You know, on a different day, it could've gone a different way.
0:31:19 > 0:31:22That's presumably A A E, is it?
0:31:23 > 0:31:24That's right.
0:31:24 > 0:31:26Mixed blessings.
0:31:26 > 0:31:29Oh, dear. I didn't get the English S-level at all.
0:31:29 > 0:31:31Didn't you? Which isn't very impressive, in fact,
0:31:31 > 0:31:33especially for Oxbridge.
0:31:33 > 0:31:35I mean, I'll be definitely going...
0:31:35 > 0:31:38So, I didn't get into Oxford, which was a shame.
0:31:38 > 0:31:41So I slipped into the next phase of my life.
0:31:48 > 0:31:51A couple of my friends said, "Where's your spark gone?
0:31:51 > 0:31:53"You used to be really sparky."
0:31:53 > 0:31:58And there was that love of life, which sort of just went.
0:31:58 > 0:32:01And it all came to a head in my final summer term,
0:32:01 > 0:32:05when we had A-levels, and I started to lose races.
0:32:05 > 0:32:08Or I started to win them, but at such a cost that
0:32:08 > 0:32:13I... I got physically scared that I might lose a race.
0:32:13 > 0:32:17And then there was a race I ran where a guy I'd raced before
0:32:17 > 0:32:19and beaten quite easily,
0:32:19 > 0:32:25we ran again, and he was in the lead with about 50 metres to go,
0:32:25 > 0:32:28and I ran, and I beat him.
0:32:28 > 0:32:31And I remember running across the finish line and going...
0:32:33 > 0:32:35I remember, I sort of said out loud,
0:32:37 > 0:32:39"I don't care whether I won or lost."
0:32:41 > 0:32:44Well, I just sort of lost that drive.
0:32:47 > 0:32:50Life being such an effort. Um...
0:33:31 > 0:33:35I think that the public school experience does prepare one well
0:33:35 > 0:33:38for later life.
0:33:38 > 0:33:40And the old boy network is certainly about getting ahead,
0:33:40 > 0:33:42and it does help certain people.
0:33:42 > 0:33:47What it does do is give you that opportunity to forge ahead,
0:33:47 > 0:33:51make money, get a good position in a company and a career.
0:33:54 > 0:33:57I was unable to play that game.
0:33:59 > 0:34:01I was looking for something else.
0:34:01 > 0:34:05I was looking for a more personal gratification.
0:34:05 > 0:34:07Something to do with people.
0:34:09 > 0:34:12Yeah, just tell the actors I'll be up in about five minutes.
0:34:12 > 0:34:13OK. No worries. Thanks.
0:34:13 > 0:34:18So, now I'm a theatre director, living in Western Australia,
0:34:18 > 0:34:20running a Shakespeare company.
0:34:20 > 0:34:23Now, I'm giving the cast notes.
0:34:23 > 0:34:26You know what we've rehearsed, you know what to do.
0:34:26 > 0:34:28Don't reach for a laugh when it's not there,
0:34:28 > 0:34:30but keep in the action of the piece.
0:34:30 > 0:34:31Enjoy your show.
0:34:31 > 0:34:34And have you made money in your chosen profession? No.
0:34:35 > 0:34:39No, I very much see myself as the black sheep of the family
0:34:39 > 0:34:41in that regard.
0:34:41 > 0:34:44Yeah, theatre is not a lucrative business, sadly.
0:34:46 > 0:34:47Here comes Beatrice.
0:34:47 > 0:34:50By this day, she's a fair lady.
0:34:52 > 0:34:53LAUGHTER
0:34:54 > 0:34:56In the film in the series...
0:34:56 > 0:34:58Mmm. ...you're like the school stud.
0:34:58 > 0:35:02And did you go on then and have loads of relationships with women?
0:35:02 > 0:35:06And how did that all pan out? No. Um... I wish!
0:35:10 > 0:35:12I remember leaving and going up to university
0:35:12 > 0:35:17and I was an undergrad up at York and there was a glass door
0:35:17 > 0:35:22and I held it open for a woman, a girl to come the other way.
0:35:23 > 0:35:26And she wouldn't walk through it.
0:35:26 > 0:35:30Cos I'd held the door open for her she thought it was me being male
0:35:30 > 0:35:36and patronising, and I'd grown up with that as simple manners.
0:35:36 > 0:35:39You know, it sort of comes down to that tension between manners
0:35:39 > 0:35:41for life, which we were given,
0:35:41 > 0:35:49but not having any realistic mode of communication with females.
0:35:52 > 0:35:54Have you always gone for a certain type of woman?
0:35:55 > 0:35:58I'm probably about as deep as a puddle in the sense that
0:35:58 > 0:35:59I do like attractive women.
0:35:59 > 0:36:06I've been lucky to have some very attractive girlfriends.
0:36:06 > 0:36:07Wives?
0:36:07 > 0:36:10And my wife is very beautiful, too.
0:36:12 > 0:36:13Yeah, only one wife.
0:36:16 > 0:36:19As I've always wanted to be a parent, I've always thought
0:36:19 > 0:36:23I would be a good parent, and now I have children,
0:36:23 > 0:36:26I truly believe that I am a good father,
0:36:26 > 0:36:29because I'm able to give my children much more
0:36:29 > 0:36:31in the emotional sense,
0:36:31 > 0:36:33than my parents gave me, you know, kissing,
0:36:33 > 0:36:36hugging, holding hands,
0:36:36 > 0:36:39all those things that I didn't grow up with.
0:36:44 > 0:36:47It's Teresa's first day of kindergarten tomorrow.
0:36:47 > 0:36:52How do you feel about her starting her first little school?
0:36:52 > 0:36:54A little bit emotional.
0:36:54 > 0:36:56It's the beginning of letting her go.
0:36:59 > 0:37:01I've always been glad that I followed my heart,
0:37:01 > 0:37:05but now that I'm getting older and I've got two young children
0:37:05 > 0:37:09they won't have the privilege of a private education
0:37:09 > 0:37:11cos I can't afford it.
0:37:11 > 0:37:13"The Prince took charge. Stand fast.
0:37:13 > 0:37:15"Secure the rigging and without warning..."
0:37:15 > 0:37:18I think it's interesting because, to my parents, being a good parent
0:37:18 > 0:37:21was getting a great education, sending us to a good school.
0:37:22 > 0:37:25Weirdly enough, I'm not able to do those things,
0:37:25 > 0:37:28so in their terms, I would not be a good parent.
0:37:29 > 0:37:31It's just about choices, really.
0:37:33 > 0:37:35I love you.
0:37:38 > 0:37:42Well, when I left Radley, I decided, "Right, I am going to have a job
0:37:42 > 0:37:44"by the time I have finished at university."
0:37:44 > 0:37:46And I applied to everybody.
0:37:46 > 0:37:47I just wanted to get a job.
0:37:49 > 0:37:53When I was in the midst of doing all of these job applications,
0:37:53 > 0:37:57this notice went up on the Edinburgh University careers notice board,
0:37:57 > 0:37:59saying, "No specific degree required,
0:37:59 > 0:38:02"just entrepreneurial flair and willingness to travel."
0:38:07 > 0:38:10Well, this is the headquarters of
0:38:10 > 0:38:13Wah Kwong Maritime Transport Holdings Ltd,
0:38:13 > 0:38:16one of Hong Kong's largest, privately owned ship owners.
0:38:17 > 0:38:20I'm the CEO of this company, so, at the end of the day,
0:38:20 > 0:38:21the buck stops with me.
0:38:22 > 0:38:25It's been my home for 24 years.
0:38:25 > 0:38:28Virtually everybody here is from either Hong Kong or China.
0:38:28 > 0:38:31I'm the only Brit working here.
0:38:31 > 0:38:32Do you speak Cantonese?
0:38:32 > 0:38:36I can order a drink and I can get home in a taxi, but that's about it.
0:38:37 > 0:38:40TV: Seasoned comrades!
0:38:41 > 0:38:44Britain has seen the major political parties...
0:38:44 > 0:38:48This is many, many years ago,
0:38:48 > 0:38:51in a land far, far away,
0:38:51 > 0:38:52when I was very young.
0:38:57 > 0:39:01When you think of socialist Tim. What happened to him?
0:39:01 > 0:39:04Well, when I left Radley I sort of had these wonderful dreams
0:39:04 > 0:39:05of being a journalist...
0:39:07 > 0:39:09..and maybe even possibly changing the world a bit,
0:39:09 > 0:39:15but it's funny how, for a profession that is so competitive to get into,
0:39:15 > 0:39:17the remuneration is so awful.
0:39:18 > 0:39:20Is your industry well paid?
0:39:21 > 0:39:24I'm better off than if I'd been a journalist.
0:39:24 > 0:39:26'Yeah, I have done very well out of it.
0:39:26 > 0:39:28'I am comfortably off, that's for sure.'
0:39:29 > 0:39:31..let's do the naming then.
0:39:31 > 0:39:35Let's not give them any more bad news before Chinese new year...
0:39:35 > 0:39:37'The most important thing
0:39:37 > 0:39:41'that you come out of a school like Radley with is the template
0:39:41 > 0:39:44'for you to build on the set of values...
0:39:45 > 0:39:48'..and good manners, which are great things to have,'
0:39:48 > 0:39:50cos they cost you nothing.
0:39:50 > 0:39:53And they do actually...
0:39:53 > 0:39:55They get you into places.
0:39:59 > 0:40:03You work hard here. In Hong Kong, it never stops.
0:40:05 > 0:40:08You might leave work, and you might then have two or three
0:40:08 > 0:40:11business appointments in the evening.
0:40:11 > 0:40:13My only rule here is that I always try to ensure that I'm in a taxi,
0:40:13 > 0:40:15going home before midnight.
0:40:22 > 0:40:25Boarding school makes you very independent.
0:40:25 > 0:40:28I mean, I've lived on my own for 30 years, you know, not sharing
0:40:28 > 0:40:33a flat or anything, and I, yes, I think I can look after myself.
0:40:33 > 0:40:35Can you look after yourself a bit too well?
0:40:37 > 0:40:40Um... To let anyone else in?
0:40:48 > 0:40:49Maybe.
0:40:53 > 0:40:57When I came to Hong Kong, I was 28 years old,
0:40:57 > 0:41:01and I do remember then starting to put away money every month
0:41:01 > 0:41:04for school fees, specifically for school fees.
0:41:04 > 0:41:06Um...
0:41:06 > 0:41:11Well, I never got married, so, you know, that hasn't been spent.
0:41:13 > 0:41:15Has that been a sadness to you, though?
0:41:20 > 0:41:25Yeah. I believe, when I left Radley, I thought that what you did
0:41:25 > 0:41:27when you... Well, I thought that what I would do
0:41:27 > 0:41:30was I'd go and get a good job in the UK,
0:41:30 > 0:41:35and have a couple of boys, and I'd send them to Radley.
0:41:35 > 0:41:36I thought that would happen.
0:41:38 > 0:41:39Wasn't the only thing in my life,
0:41:39 > 0:41:41but it was certainly something that I thought,
0:41:41 > 0:41:42"OK, that is going to happen,
0:41:42 > 0:41:44"and I should prepare for that eventuality."
0:41:44 > 0:41:45And, OK, it didn't happen.
0:41:55 > 0:41:59Tell me what you made of your Radley husband when you met him.
0:42:00 > 0:42:02Well, it's not a shock,
0:42:02 > 0:42:05I mean, I'd waitressed all the way through university.
0:42:05 > 0:42:07I know lots of posh people, and I've got friends who are posh,
0:42:07 > 0:42:10you know, it's not another world,
0:42:10 > 0:42:12but I guess when he said he missed his swimming pool
0:42:12 > 0:42:14it was a bit of a clue.
0:42:16 > 0:42:17Can I help?
0:42:17 > 0:42:19We lived in a council flat.
0:42:19 > 0:42:22No-one you knew went to public school.
0:42:22 > 0:42:27No-one went away to school, unless you went to Borstal.
0:42:27 > 0:42:29Never mind. It'll all wash off...
0:42:29 > 0:42:34He laughed out loud. I found that really disconcerting.
0:42:34 > 0:42:36We'd go to the cinema, and something'd be funny,
0:42:36 > 0:42:38and he'd really laugh.
0:42:38 > 0:42:41I was, like, "Duck down, someone's going to hit you," you know?
0:42:41 > 0:42:43There's just this sort of innate confidence.
0:42:44 > 0:42:49He says, "Thank you," a lot, and he always opens doors.
0:42:49 > 0:42:51That would all be too nice for me.
0:42:51 > 0:42:53I'm not that nice. But he's got a really sick mind.
0:43:01 > 0:43:03Asgard, it's the realm of the Norse Gods,
0:43:03 > 0:43:05where Thor and Loki come from,
0:43:05 > 0:43:07you see, and that's how they roll in Asgard...
0:43:07 > 0:43:10Lou is polar opposite of my background.
0:43:10 > 0:43:13Totally different, but we share a very similar sensibility,
0:43:13 > 0:43:15a very similar sense of humour.
0:43:15 > 0:43:18She's not into science fiction and stuff as much as I am,
0:43:18 > 0:43:21but she tolerates my, you know, geeky affectations.
0:43:21 > 0:43:23Oh, and this is where Thor comes in.
0:43:23 > 0:43:26You'll like him, too, cos he's hunky as well.
0:43:26 > 0:43:29So we have an amazing amount in common, and yet
0:43:29 > 0:43:34we come from totally opposite ends of, you know, the world, as it were.
0:43:36 > 0:43:41I'm a professional author. I write science fiction mostly.
0:43:41 > 0:43:44I am now making a living as a writer. I um...
0:43:44 > 0:43:46A good living? A reasonably good living.
0:43:46 > 0:43:49It could be better, believe me.
0:43:49 > 0:43:52Would you board your kids, Lou? Would I board my children?
0:43:53 > 0:43:55No, is the short answer.
0:43:55 > 0:43:58I don't want my children to live anywhere else but with me.
0:43:58 > 0:44:01I can't bear the thought of them being away. I mean, they're tiny.
0:44:01 > 0:44:04James went when he was seven, so that's in six months.
0:44:04 > 0:44:08Eight. Eight? Eight, yeah. OK. So, in a year or so, he'd be gone.
0:44:08 > 0:44:10Monty would be gone already.
0:44:10 > 0:44:15You know, who's giving them hugs, who's giving them cuddles?
0:44:15 > 0:44:18And if they are giving them cuddles, then I'd be really sad,
0:44:18 > 0:44:20perversely, cos that should be my job.
0:44:20 > 0:44:23You know, I understand the best education,
0:44:23 > 0:44:26and I've heard that you can meet, you know, friends for life
0:44:26 > 0:44:30and people that, you know, will be useful for you through life,
0:44:30 > 0:44:33but I don't think any of that compensates for having
0:44:33 > 0:44:37a really good home background,
0:44:37 > 0:44:40for the emotional intelligence and security.
0:44:40 > 0:44:42I don't know, you can be as rich as anything,
0:44:42 > 0:44:44but unless you're happy, unless you've got people to love
0:44:44 > 0:44:47and you know how to love them, and people to love you back, OK,
0:44:47 > 0:44:51this is what I say to James, is, that's what makes you happy.
0:44:51 > 0:44:52It's not how much money you've got.
0:44:52 > 0:44:54No, it's my ice cream. You can't have it.
0:44:54 > 0:44:57We've made our feelings pretty clear that our children
0:44:57 > 0:44:59aren't going to boarding school and the reasons for it,
0:44:59 > 0:45:02but, you know, it's not been a source of friction or whatever.
0:45:02 > 0:45:05It's our decision, and I don't think you have a problem with it?
0:45:05 > 0:45:09Absolutely none at all. And it's partly financial, obviously, but...
0:45:09 > 0:45:12Not only financial. No, it's not partly financial.
0:45:12 > 0:45:14If money were no object,
0:45:14 > 0:45:17we would still not want them to go to a boarding school.
0:45:17 > 0:45:18Mm.
0:45:21 > 0:45:24So, in the world of public school connections,
0:45:24 > 0:45:25has that brought you much?
0:45:25 > 0:45:27No, no. Nothing, really.
0:45:27 > 0:45:31No, it has been absolutely no advantage whatsoever,
0:45:31 > 0:45:33and I don't think it defined my life.
0:45:33 > 0:45:36I don't think being at a public school has made me what I am.
0:45:38 > 0:45:42Do you think in a way public school might be giving the boys so much
0:45:42 > 0:45:45confidence, the confidence to say, "The school didn't help me at all?"
0:45:45 > 0:45:48Well, that would be the ultimate irony, wouldn't it?
0:45:55 > 0:45:59When I left university, I joined the Army.
0:45:59 > 0:46:05I liked the sense of camaraderie, I liked the sense of adventure
0:46:05 > 0:46:07and excitement and risk.
0:46:07 > 0:46:11I also felt it was right, giving something back to one's country,
0:46:11 > 0:46:15and so I think I joined the Army for the right reasons.
0:46:15 > 0:46:18It wasn't just because I couldn't think of anything else to do.
0:46:18 > 0:46:21Er...
0:46:21 > 0:46:26It wasn't to do with a love of all-male institutions,
0:46:26 > 0:46:28before you ask.
0:46:29 > 0:46:33After about, well, it was roughly ten years, I left the Army,
0:46:33 > 0:46:36because I wanted some grounding in industry.
0:46:36 > 0:46:41There was an advertisement in the Sunday Times, which I applied for.
0:46:41 > 0:46:45I became a management trainee in a supermarket group.
0:46:45 > 0:46:48Which one?
0:46:48 > 0:46:52It was, well, it's now called Somerfield. It was called Gateway.
0:46:52 > 0:46:57Gateway, at the time, was sitting quite at the bottom of the heap.
0:46:57 > 0:47:01They were constantly lurching from one crisis to the next,
0:47:01 > 0:47:07so it was a very challenging organisation to work for,
0:47:07 > 0:47:10but for "challenging," read "exciting."
0:47:10 > 0:47:14And for what I was trying to achieve, which was learning as much
0:47:14 > 0:47:18as possible in the shortest space of time, it couldn't have been better.
0:47:18 > 0:47:22I was a supermarket manager in Cirencester,
0:47:22 > 0:47:26and we had eight holes in our roof, and every time it rained,
0:47:26 > 0:47:29the rain came through the roof onto the bread fixture,
0:47:29 > 0:47:33so I had to organise a line of shoppers -
0:47:33 > 0:47:36and they didn't seem to mind -
0:47:36 > 0:47:40to move the bread off the bread fixture to take it out of the way!
0:47:40 > 0:47:43What did your friends from school think about you joining
0:47:43 > 0:47:44Gateway Supermarket?
0:47:44 > 0:47:47Astonished. I mean, my friends were astonished.
0:47:47 > 0:47:49Everybody I knew was astonished.
0:47:50 > 0:47:54But I was very lucky in so far as my regimental tie
0:47:54 > 0:47:59looked really quite similar to the Gateway company tie,
0:47:59 > 0:48:04so, in fact, I spent three years in my regimental tie and my suit.
0:48:04 > 0:48:06So I kind of made it my own world.
0:48:12 > 0:48:16I think I always knew I'd end up running my own company.
0:48:16 > 0:48:18I didn't know when I started off
0:48:18 > 0:48:20that I'd be running this kind of company.
0:48:22 > 0:48:24So now I'm in investment banking.
0:48:24 > 0:48:25Hi, George.
0:48:25 > 0:48:27Good afternoon, sir.
0:48:27 > 0:48:30I'm executive chairman of Claridge Capital Group.
0:48:31 > 0:48:36We've got an office in Mayfair, and doing really well.
0:48:36 > 0:48:40Quite a jump from Gateway in Cirencester, those days?
0:48:40 > 0:48:43It's a journey.
0:48:43 > 0:48:46If you've got that long-term view, and you start basically...
0:48:46 > 0:48:49'Proposing investments to high network people,
0:48:49 > 0:48:53'one needs to build people's confidence,
0:48:53 > 0:48:55'you know, people trust people.'
0:48:55 > 0:49:00I think Radley was not essential for what I'm doing now.
0:49:00 > 0:49:03I think the kind of school probably was.
0:49:03 > 0:49:07Do we know about China? They're all confirmed.
0:49:07 > 0:49:10Generally speaking, the public school system
0:49:10 > 0:49:14drags the best out of people, and hopefully,
0:49:14 > 0:49:17the whole of the state system will do their very best
0:49:17 > 0:49:21to learn from those schools rather than damn them,
0:49:21 > 0:49:24because I think they're internationally acknowledged
0:49:24 > 0:49:28as setting a benchmark of how a school should be.
0:49:28 > 0:49:32Aren't those schools damned because it's just unfair?
0:49:32 > 0:49:39And is it fair that so many people from one school can take so many
0:49:39 > 0:49:46of the positions in life, and in power and business?
0:49:46 > 0:49:49Um, I think it's an absolute indictment of the state schools.
0:49:49 > 0:49:51I don't think that...
0:49:51 > 0:49:53There's absolutely no reason at all
0:49:53 > 0:50:01why the state system can't aspire to achieve
0:50:01 > 0:50:03what the public schools do.
0:50:03 > 0:50:06I think it's poverty of ambition.
0:50:29 > 0:50:33Look, Archie, can you just keep one match?
0:50:33 > 0:50:35Oh, hello. Hi.
0:50:35 > 0:50:37This is Mel, my wife. Hi. Hello.
0:50:37 > 0:50:41And this is Archie and Katrina and Dougal.
0:50:41 > 0:50:44Archie, try not to be a moron. Come on.
0:50:47 > 0:50:50Where are we? What's your place called?
0:50:50 > 0:50:53The house? This is Pylewell Park, it's called.
0:50:53 > 0:50:55How many rooms?
0:50:55 > 0:50:58Oh, gosh. I haven't even counted.
0:50:58 > 0:51:04It's about...15 bedrooms, is it? Something like that. Yeah.
0:51:04 > 0:51:06Did you always know you'd end up here?
0:51:06 > 0:51:10No, I never knew I was going to end up here definitely, at all.
0:51:10 > 0:51:14No. Was it anything to do with going to Radley?
0:51:14 > 0:51:16No, not really. No. No, no.
0:51:16 > 0:51:21It was just one of those quirks of fate, I suppose.
0:51:21 > 0:51:25My great uncle lived here before, didn't have any children,
0:51:25 > 0:51:27so it went to my father.
0:51:27 > 0:51:30Well, he still owns it all.
0:51:30 > 0:51:34I'm merely...effectively a tenant.
0:51:34 > 0:51:36But you've booted him out?
0:51:36 > 0:51:39That's what he might think. I didn't boot him out.
0:51:39 > 0:51:40No, it was a mutual decision.
0:51:40 > 0:51:43Since they did the rewiring,
0:51:43 > 0:51:46I've had a quote done to re-carpet along the corridor.
0:51:46 > 0:51:49Yeah, that was going to cost a lot of money.
0:51:49 > 0:51:52So you must let me know what's going on. Yeah, well, yeah.
0:51:52 > 0:51:55I need to know what's happening.
0:51:55 > 0:52:00So this is where I work. Excuse the mess.
0:52:00 > 0:52:04These are portrait heads, so these will,
0:52:04 > 0:52:10when I've finished the modelling, they will be cast in bronze.
0:52:10 > 0:52:13There's one over there which I've just recently finished.
0:52:13 > 0:52:16He's in the private equity business.
0:52:16 > 0:52:19And this is one I'm working on at the moment.
0:52:19 > 0:52:21I'm never going to make it rich being a sculptor,
0:52:21 > 0:52:22but, you know, it's a living.
0:52:22 > 0:52:25You can get by on it.
0:52:25 > 0:52:27So this is the drawing room.
0:52:27 > 0:52:32If you notice carefully, a lot of the furniture is in a bit of...
0:52:32 > 0:52:37need of restoration, to say the least.
0:52:37 > 0:52:41Is it expensive to live in a place like this?
0:52:41 > 0:52:42How do you afford it?
0:52:42 > 0:52:45Good question. I sometimes think we can't afford it,
0:52:45 > 0:52:47but we somehow manage to scrape by.
0:52:47 > 0:52:52The only way you can do it is just redecorating rooms as and when we can.
0:52:52 > 0:52:54And who's doing them?
0:52:54 > 0:52:56Mel's doing it all. Quite a lot of it.
0:52:56 > 0:52:59Yeah. Up and down ladders all day.
0:53:02 > 0:53:04How old is Archie now?
0:53:04 > 0:53:06Eight.
0:53:06 > 0:53:09Same age as you were when you went to school.
0:53:09 > 0:53:13Pretty much. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
0:53:13 > 0:53:16Archie, you're going to a new school, aren't you, in September?
0:53:16 > 0:53:18Oh, yeah.
0:53:18 > 0:53:20Yeah. And what's it called? Ludgrove.
0:53:20 > 0:53:21Ludgrove. There you are.
0:53:21 > 0:53:23What sort of school?
0:53:23 > 0:53:25It's a prep school, a boarding school.
0:53:25 > 0:53:32And, yeah, no, I think he's keen to move on, but, you know,
0:53:32 > 0:53:35rather like me, as I was that age,
0:53:35 > 0:53:38he doesn't know what it's going to be about.
0:53:38 > 0:53:40So what do you think about going to Ludgrove?
0:53:40 > 0:53:42I think I want to go to it.
0:53:42 > 0:53:43But why?
0:53:43 > 0:53:45I don't know. I just want to go.
0:53:45 > 0:53:47Yeah. Well, there you are.
0:53:47 > 0:53:49I come back every two weeks.
0:53:49 > 0:53:50That's true, yeah.
0:53:50 > 0:53:54Yeah, we're both a bit anxious about it, because, you know,
0:53:54 > 0:53:58he's not going to be with us here and we're going to miss him.
0:53:58 > 0:54:00But on the other hand, you know, it's progressive.
0:54:00 > 0:54:02He has to move on.
0:54:02 > 0:54:06You know, he's a bit of a live wire, as you can see him,
0:54:06 > 0:54:08and I think, you know, all the sports and everything
0:54:08 > 0:54:11that it's got to offer will be a good thing.
0:54:13 > 0:54:15And, you know, he will flourish.
0:54:17 > 0:54:18Dougie! Come on, Dougie.
0:54:42 > 0:54:43Hi.
0:54:43 > 0:54:44Hello. Come in.
0:54:44 > 0:54:51So, here we are in Perth, WA, Western Australia, in our house.
0:54:51 > 0:54:54You've got the sitting room in there,
0:54:54 > 0:54:57couple of bedrooms behind you. Hm.
0:54:57 > 0:55:03Boys' bedrooms either side here. One each.
0:55:03 > 0:55:08And then this is where we spend most of our time.
0:55:08 > 0:55:14So, kitchen and living area. A few children to introduce.
0:55:14 > 0:55:15Hi! Hi.
0:55:15 > 0:55:17This is Freddy, Izzy and Arthur.
0:55:17 > 0:55:21Hello. And just hanging out.
0:55:21 > 0:55:24And out here, let me show you the veranda and the garden.
0:55:28 > 0:55:31So, as you can see, we're all set up for back yard cricket here.
0:55:31 > 0:55:34Bit of extra sporting equipment behind you.
0:55:34 > 0:55:36So you're still sporty?
0:55:36 > 0:55:38Yes. I mean, sport's what we do.
0:55:46 > 0:55:49'So now I'm a doctor.
0:55:49 > 0:55:54'I'm a paediatrician, and my main interest is in adolescent medicine.'
0:55:54 > 0:55:56Karly, my name's Donald Payne.
0:55:56 > 0:55:58'So primarily I work with teenagers.'
0:55:58 > 0:56:00Hi, there.
0:56:00 > 0:56:01I became really unwell and...
0:56:01 > 0:56:02Yeah.
0:56:02 > 0:56:04When did you make this? At home.
0:56:04 > 0:56:07'And I think I have empathy.'
0:56:07 > 0:56:12I know what it is like to struggle as a teenager.
0:56:12 > 0:56:14In hindsight,
0:56:14 > 0:56:18I would've probably been diagnosed with a sort of anxious depression.
0:56:18 > 0:56:23And then I left school and it all sort of got better.
0:56:26 > 0:56:28Ooh!
0:56:28 > 0:56:31We were actually working together for quite a while.
0:56:31 > 0:56:35It took quite a long time for him to ask me out.
0:56:35 > 0:56:40But when we did, it was just really easy being together,
0:56:40 > 0:56:43and I think it didn't take me long to realise then
0:56:43 > 0:56:45that he was going to be the one.
0:56:45 > 0:56:49You know, Donald certainly relates to adolescents having difficult times,
0:56:49 > 0:56:54and I'm just thrilled because I can just hand over all our adolescent problems to him.
0:56:54 > 0:56:56What are you doing? Maths?
0:56:56 > 0:56:57Yeah, just maths.
0:56:57 > 0:57:02My parents were great and they really gave me everything,
0:57:02 > 0:57:03but they weren't as involved.
0:57:03 > 0:57:05So, this line is going...
0:57:05 > 0:57:09'If you're away for 36 weeks of the year, there's no way round that.
0:57:09 > 0:57:14'My kids go to school locally, and I've always deliberately set out
0:57:14 > 0:57:16'to try to be involved in what they do,'
0:57:16 > 0:57:18and that's the way I prefer it.
0:57:18 > 0:57:20And I think they probably prefer it.
0:57:22 > 0:57:25'I want the kids to do really well.'
0:57:25 > 0:57:29I want them to care, but I would never want them to get to the stage
0:57:29 > 0:57:32where I got to, where it became almost all-consuming.
0:57:39 > 0:57:41I look back, and that's what happened.
0:57:41 > 0:57:43That's what happened to me.
0:57:43 > 0:57:46It happened at Radley,
0:57:46 > 0:57:49but I don't think it was anything much to do with Radley.
0:57:50 > 0:57:55If you've got talent, people tend to push you, and some people
0:57:55 > 0:57:58thrive on it, and some people really find it difficult.
0:57:59 > 0:58:02How long is it since you were back here?
0:58:02 > 0:58:06I'm going to say it's at least 20 years,
0:58:06 > 0:58:09probably a bit longer.
0:58:09 > 0:58:11Yeah.
0:58:11 > 0:58:12Weird?
0:58:12 > 0:58:16Hasn't changed. Hasn't changed at all.
0:58:18 > 0:58:21It's quite amazing, actually, hasn't... I mean,
0:58:21 > 0:58:25even the football nets, they were here.
0:58:25 > 0:58:28Yeah, it could've been yesterday.
0:58:28 > 0:58:30Does it feel like it could be yesterday?
0:58:30 > 0:58:33Yeah. Well, not for me. I'm different.
0:58:33 > 0:58:35But the place is exactly the same.
0:58:38 > 0:58:40I'm just, yeah, I'm not at school.
0:58:40 > 0:58:41I'm just visiting now.
0:58:43 > 0:58:44How have you felt...?
0:58:44 > 0:58:46About coming back? ..for the film?
0:58:46 > 0:58:48Yeah, I think that the time that we spent
0:58:48 > 0:58:53talking about it has been quite... fairly involved
0:58:53 > 0:58:57and quite intense, but then I can leave it and move on.
0:58:57 > 0:58:58It's a school.
0:58:58 > 0:59:01I mean, in the end, it's just school.
0:59:10 > 0:59:12Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd