0:00:06 > 0:00:09You can be surrounded by people but still be isolated.
0:00:09 > 0:00:13Many of us living in cities haven't a clue who our neighbours are,
0:00:13 > 0:00:17let alone be able to call on them for support.
0:00:17 > 0:00:19There may be a lot of people in a city
0:00:19 > 0:00:25but more people doesn't necessarily mean more people to talk to.
0:00:25 > 0:00:28If I can just encourage people to come out from behind closed doors
0:00:28 > 0:00:31a bit, find a bit of time for those around them,
0:00:31 > 0:00:34I'm sure friendships will forge.
0:00:34 > 0:00:37My secret weapon is Olympic athlete Denise Lewis,
0:00:37 > 0:00:40who grew up in Wolverhampton.
0:00:40 > 0:00:43She even has the freedom of the city.
0:00:43 > 0:00:46I'm hoping that bringing her back to her old stomping ground
0:00:46 > 0:00:48will bring back a few memories.
0:00:48 > 0:00:50It is a great open space, though.
0:00:50 > 0:00:53It is a great open space. And I just ran everywhere. I loved running.
0:00:53 > 0:00:57And who knows? She may even recognise a few faces.
0:00:57 > 0:00:59So, I bet this brings back memories.
0:00:59 > 0:01:04- Oh, man, I can't believe it. - This is your street.- Wow!
0:01:04 > 0:01:07Well, certainly the one that you were brought up on.
0:01:07 > 0:01:09Yeah, I mean, this is where it started, I guess.
0:01:09 > 0:01:13Now, the streets are similar wherever you go down here.
0:01:13 > 0:01:17- Do you see it's changed much over the years, or...?- Not at all.
0:01:17 > 0:01:19I mean, it's hard.
0:01:19 > 0:01:23I think I left about 1980, around there, and I haven't been back since.
0:01:23 > 0:01:28So, was it just you and your mum living here, then? Tell me about your childhood.
0:01:28 > 0:01:30Yeah, just me and my mum and my little cat.
0:01:30 > 0:01:34- So, how on earth did you get into athletics?- Ha-ha! Oh, I don't know.
0:01:34 > 0:01:38My mum was five foot one, and I think I used to have to run
0:01:38 > 0:01:42alongside her, because she just marches and power-walks everywhere.
0:01:42 > 0:01:43I don't know.
0:01:43 > 0:01:47I think athletics, for me, was the 1980 Moscow Olympics,
0:01:47 > 0:01:50which I had watched on the television on this street
0:01:50 > 0:01:54and I fell in love with the whole occasion.
0:01:54 > 0:01:55But you lived just here.
0:01:55 > 0:01:57Oh, my goodness!
0:02:05 > 0:02:08- What's that like, seeing it again?- Just...
0:02:11 > 0:02:14Just really strange, really weird.
0:02:14 > 0:02:16I used to play, have you heard of Kerby?
0:02:16 > 0:02:18Remember the game with the ball?
0:02:18 > 0:02:21I used to live in a village. What's Kerby?
0:02:21 > 0:02:24So, you'd get your ball and you'd get points, you would score points,
0:02:24 > 0:02:27if you hit the face of the kerb, and you would throw it
0:02:27 > 0:02:31from the opposite side of the street and try and hit the kerb.
0:02:31 > 0:02:33Gosh. You haven't lived!
0:02:33 > 0:02:37I lived on a pig farm. I can tell you that I haven't lived, trust me!
0:02:37 > 0:02:38Yeah, but the idea of this,
0:02:38 > 0:02:41and the idea of what I want you to do today, is to gather
0:02:41 > 0:02:44some of that community by knocking on a few doors, all right?
0:02:44 > 0:02:47Now, I've got a few people that I'm going to meet as well.
0:02:47 > 0:02:51And the idea being to really get that community spirit back
0:02:51 > 0:02:54- together again. Something that I think we've lost, also.- Yeah.
0:02:54 > 0:02:56So I want you to knock on a few doors.
0:02:56 > 0:02:59- I'm going to go see a few people. And I'll see you later.- All right.
0:03:02 > 0:03:03The truth is, most of us
0:03:03 > 0:03:07will experience loneliness at some stage in our life.
0:03:07 > 0:03:10It's an emotion that, however painful, we need to deal with.
0:03:15 > 0:03:21Like all emotions, it's there for a reason. It's a feeling.
0:03:21 > 0:03:23And we can use feelings
0:03:23 > 0:03:29a little bit like warning lights on a dashboard.
0:03:29 > 0:03:33Now, when you've got a warning light flashing on your dashboard saying
0:03:33 > 0:03:35you need to fill up with petrol,
0:03:35 > 0:03:37what you don't do is take out the bulb.
0:03:37 > 0:03:41What you do is listen to it and do something about it.
0:03:41 > 0:03:45So that's what the feeling is for.
0:03:45 > 0:03:48It's telling you that something is wrong
0:03:48 > 0:03:52and you need to take action to make it not wrong.
0:03:52 > 0:03:57To know who we are, we are reflected back in each other.
0:03:57 > 0:04:01We act as a sort of personal mirror for each other.
0:04:01 > 0:04:04I know I'm here, because you're talking to me.
0:04:05 > 0:04:10And if I'm talking to myself, and there's nothing coming back,
0:04:10 > 0:04:15it's almost like I'm wandering around without a map.
0:04:15 > 0:04:18There's no-one to reassure me I am who I am.
0:04:18 > 0:04:21Some may choose to be alone, but solitude and loneliness
0:04:21 > 0:04:24are two very different things.
0:04:24 > 0:04:27There are different types of loneliness, too.
0:04:27 > 0:04:30A physical loneliness where people may have very little contact
0:04:30 > 0:04:34with others, and emotional loneliness where a person may know
0:04:34 > 0:04:38lots of people, but feel that nobody really relates to them.
0:04:41 > 0:04:44Jules has lived in Wolverhampton all of her life.
0:04:44 > 0:04:47She is divorced and has no children.
0:04:47 > 0:04:51But despite having an active work life, she feels empty inside.
0:04:51 > 0:04:53So, Jules, tell me about yourself.
0:04:53 > 0:04:56I grew up in quite a secure family environment
0:04:56 > 0:04:59- with three older brothers.- Are your brothers still around?- They are.
0:04:59 > 0:05:02They've all got their different lives, though.
0:05:02 > 0:05:04I maybe see my one brother, Danny.
0:05:04 > 0:05:06He's 20 years older than me, so he's 70.
0:05:06 > 0:05:09So you can work out how old I am from that!
0:05:09 > 0:05:11And I see him pretty much every day.
0:05:11 > 0:05:14Tell me about your parents.
0:05:14 > 0:05:15Boating family.
0:05:15 > 0:05:17Born and raised on the canals.
0:05:17 > 0:05:22And I had my mum most of my life until 2009.
0:05:22 > 0:05:24Because you lost your dad at a young age,
0:05:24 > 0:05:26you depend on your mum a lot more.
0:05:26 > 0:05:28I did, yeah, I did do.
0:05:28 > 0:05:31She was my best friend, my mum.
0:05:31 > 0:05:33She gave substance to my life.
0:05:33 > 0:05:35She loved me unconditionally.
0:05:35 > 0:05:37And accepted me, warts and all.
0:05:39 > 0:05:43Tell me the circumstances around your mum.
0:05:43 > 0:05:44Mum had dementia.
0:05:44 > 0:05:46She was 86.
0:05:46 > 0:05:52When she passed away in 2009, I had nothing else to move on to,
0:05:52 > 0:05:54to reshape and reform my life.
0:05:54 > 0:05:58And my life was in just a different dimension altogether.
0:06:02 > 0:06:07When you're by yourself, your thoughts do race.
0:06:07 > 0:06:10And do those thoughts change as you get older?
0:06:10 > 0:06:13Yeah, because it makes you think of your own mortality
0:06:13 > 0:06:15and where you are, and your place in the world.
0:06:15 > 0:06:16And what you've done.
0:06:16 > 0:06:20It is more night times and weekends,
0:06:20 > 0:06:22your demons, you know, your thoughts.
0:06:24 > 0:06:26I don't think it's a midlife crisis.
0:06:26 > 0:06:28I think you're missing those opportunities
0:06:28 > 0:06:31that other people seem to have had.
0:06:31 > 0:06:37And you do think, why haven't I had those opportunities?
0:06:37 > 0:06:40It sounds like you could feel sorry for yourself.
0:06:40 > 0:06:43You know? Maybe I do. But why not?
0:06:43 > 0:06:46Why shouldn't people feel sorry for themselves, in a way?
0:06:49 > 0:06:54You just feel like you've disappeared, somehow.
0:06:54 > 0:06:57You say that you feel like you've disappeared. What do you mean?
0:06:57 > 0:06:59At the end of the working day,
0:06:59 > 0:07:04when I get in my car, you're left with yourself.
0:07:04 > 0:07:06You're left with your own thoughts.
0:07:06 > 0:07:08There's nobody to go home to.
0:07:08 > 0:07:11And you take that for granted, having somebody there.
0:07:11 > 0:07:15It is not like you are co-dependent and you are relying on them.
0:07:18 > 0:07:21But I think it's, it's just to do with...
0:07:23 > 0:07:25..love, actually.
0:07:25 > 0:07:28And that's what you feel's missing,
0:07:28 > 0:07:32is having a significant other in your life,
0:07:32 > 0:07:34with you.
0:07:34 > 0:07:37You feel like you've dissolved,
0:07:37 > 0:07:40that you're not,
0:07:40 > 0:07:44you're trying to find something tangible, somebody to go to.
0:07:47 > 0:07:50It's just a feeling as though you don't want to be here any more.
0:07:57 > 0:08:00You see, the story of Jules is actually quite fascinating.
0:08:00 > 0:08:02It could happen to anybody, your friend,
0:08:02 > 0:08:05your next-door neighbour, anybody that you meet on the street.
0:08:05 > 0:08:08Because, on the outside, they seem normal,
0:08:08 > 0:08:12they seem content in their life, because they keep themselves busy.
0:08:12 > 0:08:15But let's face it, loneliness can happen to us all.
0:08:17 > 0:08:19Do we really care what happens next door?
0:08:19 > 0:08:21Do we really understand what happens over the road?
0:08:21 > 0:08:24Meeting Jules has really got me thinking.
0:08:24 > 0:08:28I always believed that loneliness was an issue for older people
0:08:28 > 0:08:33but now I've met Jules, someone who's in her 50s, I'm realising
0:08:33 > 0:08:36that it's more widespread than I could have imagined.
0:08:36 > 0:08:38This week, I want to make sure that as well as meeting
0:08:38 > 0:08:40and introducing people to each other,
0:08:40 > 0:08:44we can create some contacts that are longer-term and rewarding.
0:08:45 > 0:08:48I'm convinced that behind every door is a great story
0:08:48 > 0:08:52just waiting to be told or listened to, and I really hope
0:08:52 > 0:08:55we can bring the right people together.
0:08:59 > 0:09:04- Ah! There is someone home! - Hello!- Hello!
0:09:04 > 0:09:11- Hello! How long have you been living here?- Since 1969. That's right, yes.
0:09:11 > 0:09:14- That is a long while.- It is a long while.- You was pretty small.
0:09:14 > 0:09:18- You remember me? - Of course I do. DENISE LAUGHS
0:09:18 > 0:09:21- And how long have you been here?- For six years.- Six years?- Yeah, yeah.
0:09:21 > 0:09:24- How long have you been here? - I've only been here nine months.
0:09:24 > 0:09:28- Nine months? In England? Wow!- Here, about two months.
0:09:28 > 0:09:30And happy in here?
0:09:30 > 0:09:31Yeah, so far, so good.
0:09:37 > 0:09:38I heard a big dog.
0:09:38 > 0:09:41Hello! Are you all right? I'm Denise.
0:09:41 > 0:09:44- Nice to meet you. - Absolutely delighted.
0:09:44 > 0:09:47I don't know how long you've actually lived here.
0:09:47 > 0:09:4921 years. Just over 21 years.
0:09:49 > 0:09:52- Do you know a lot of people on the street?- No.
0:09:52 > 0:09:55I know my neighbours. Across.
0:09:55 > 0:09:59She's a very nice woman. We are getting along well.
0:09:59 > 0:10:01- You get on well?- Yeah. - Well, that's nice.
0:10:01 > 0:10:03She says I'm a good tenant, a good neighbour.
0:10:03 > 0:10:04A good neighbour. Yes.
0:10:04 > 0:10:06How well do you know your neighbours?
0:10:06 > 0:10:09Pretty well, to be honest with you.
0:10:09 > 0:10:12I used to run a Neighbourhood Watch scheme
0:10:12 > 0:10:13about seven or eight years ago
0:10:13 > 0:10:16and sort of interacted with all the neighbours
0:10:16 > 0:10:20both sides, all up and down, I speak to everybody.
0:10:20 > 0:10:24On the surface, all seems well, but as Denise probes a little deeper...
0:10:24 > 0:10:27So how do you find the street?
0:10:27 > 0:10:29- Quiet? Friendly?- Quiet.
0:10:31 > 0:10:3350-50.
0:10:33 > 0:10:35- Yes, no.- Yes and no?
0:10:35 > 0:10:38There's some people who do keep themselves to themselves
0:10:38 > 0:10:42and just try to sort of bring those out of their shells but it's not easy at all.
0:10:42 > 0:10:45Some people that's on the street are unwilling, really.
0:10:45 > 0:10:49And are there still a lot of elderly people on the street?
0:10:49 > 0:10:51No, that seems to have changed over the last,
0:10:51 > 0:10:55over the last 15 years or so.
0:10:55 > 0:11:00Well, the neighbours that I was familiar with passed away.
0:11:00 > 0:11:03But still, a few are still here.
0:11:03 > 0:11:05And we say hello to each other
0:11:05 > 0:11:09and we have a little conversation whenever possible.
0:11:09 > 0:11:12When I first came here there was a bad press about it.
0:11:12 > 0:11:15But I thought it was... It's a nice community. It's good.
0:11:15 > 0:11:17- Friendly?- Yeah. Very friendly.
0:11:17 > 0:11:22And as Denise discovers, some of the residents do have needs
0:11:22 > 0:11:26that could be resolved by just communicating with each other.
0:11:26 > 0:11:30I've been living here and the wife passed away in December.
0:11:30 > 0:11:31Why did you stay?
0:11:33 > 0:11:34My roots is here,
0:11:34 > 0:11:37and I'm going to stay.
0:11:37 > 0:11:39Because the wife...
0:11:39 > 0:11:42Well, it's a long time.
0:11:42 > 0:11:45I like relating with people. I mean...
0:11:45 > 0:11:48I don't enjoy being shut up here on my own most of the time.
0:11:48 > 0:11:51So do you feel on your own here?
0:11:51 > 0:11:54I'm getting a sense that you feel a bit on your own.
0:11:54 > 0:11:56- A lot of the time. - A lot of the time.
0:11:56 > 0:12:01Though at some point I had the right-hand side weakness -
0:12:01 > 0:12:04that's from January, I'm still being treated at the moment...
0:12:04 > 0:12:10But though I can't really do the stairs and all that, my daughter helps me.
0:12:11 > 0:12:14I was going to say I don't have a telly. I don't have a telly, and um...
0:12:14 > 0:12:17I think
0:12:17 > 0:12:21sometimes you want somebody around you want to talk to and things like that.
0:12:21 > 0:12:26If I go to the allotment and nothing to do, I sit in a little shed
0:12:26 > 0:12:28and read my paper.
0:12:28 > 0:12:30And pass the time away, you know.
0:12:30 > 0:12:33There's loads to be gained from knitting this community together.
0:12:33 > 0:12:36They just need a bit of a helping hand to get things started.
0:12:36 > 0:12:40If you are around today, it would be lovely for you to come along to the tenants' meeting room
0:12:40 > 0:12:44- and meet some of the residents that go there daily.- OK.- Yeah?
0:12:44 > 0:12:47- Brilliant. See you at four o'clock, then.- See you later. Bye-bye.
0:12:47 > 0:12:50- And really meet the street. - No problem.
0:12:50 > 0:12:55- If you're free, I'd love you to come and meet some of the residents. - Yeah, sure. Not a problem at all.
0:12:55 > 0:12:57See you later. Thank you.
0:12:57 > 0:12:59- Oh, thank you so much.- Brilliant. - All right.
0:13:01 > 0:13:03- See you shortly.- All right. - Thank you.
0:13:04 > 0:13:09Denise has made a fantastic start to bring people closer together.
0:13:09 > 0:13:13But I want to get a better grasp of what is happening in today's communities.
0:13:13 > 0:13:19I also wonder if that thing we all call "community" just isn't as strong as it used to be.
0:13:20 > 0:13:24Have we all become a little bit too selfish to care about others?
0:13:24 > 0:13:27Because it's never really talked about,
0:13:27 > 0:13:31we've sort of taken it for granted that relationships just happen.
0:13:31 > 0:13:35And I'm not just talking about relationships between two partners,
0:13:35 > 0:13:37I'm talking about all relationships.
0:13:37 > 0:13:40All the myriad of
0:13:40 > 0:13:44acquaintance and relationship you get in a community.
0:13:44 > 0:13:46I think we've taken that for granted.
0:13:46 > 0:13:50And we've been looking at other goals, other than
0:13:50 > 0:13:54how we all support each other. We've been chasing status.
0:13:54 > 0:13:58You know, what job we do.
0:13:58 > 0:14:03We've been chasing wealth. We've been shopping...
0:14:05 > 0:14:07You know, we're buying our friends, we're collecting them
0:14:07 > 0:14:12like postage stamps, if you think of things like Facebook and Twitter.
0:14:12 > 0:14:16It's all about numbers. It's all about quantity and not quality.
0:14:16 > 0:14:17And I think
0:14:17 > 0:14:23this sort of unspoken belief system that seems to be taking society over
0:14:23 > 0:14:26is causing a bit of a problem.
0:14:26 > 0:14:28I think we need to get back to basics,
0:14:28 > 0:14:31and really look after our connections.
0:14:41 > 0:14:43There's a real sense of transition on this street -
0:14:43 > 0:14:46a lot of older generations that have been here for maybe
0:14:46 > 0:14:51up to 50 years, versus a lot of new families moving into the area.
0:14:51 > 0:14:53And there's a little bit of a disconnection,
0:14:53 > 0:14:55which I want to try and make a change,
0:14:55 > 0:14:58and that's what I'm hoping we'll be able to do later on today.
0:14:59 > 0:15:04I'm convinced that pulling the community together can only be a good thing.
0:15:04 > 0:15:07But for some people, their loneliness is so deep,
0:15:07 > 0:15:10a cup of tea and just a chat won't fix it.
0:15:10 > 0:15:14Longing for someone to talk to must be a desperate feeling.
0:15:14 > 0:15:18But having someone close, and then losing them, is hard to get over.
0:15:19 > 0:15:23Grief is something that hits us all in different ways.
0:15:23 > 0:15:28And when your lifelong partner dies, sometimes nothing can fill the gap.
0:15:30 > 0:15:34'Yuna moved to the UK from Jamaica over 50 years ago,
0:15:34 > 0:15:36'and has had many happy years living in Wolverhampton,
0:15:36 > 0:15:40'bringing up her six children with her husband.
0:15:40 > 0:15:42'Recently, she's been widowed,
0:15:42 > 0:15:45'and is struggling with living alone.'
0:15:46 > 0:15:48Tell me about your late husband.
0:15:48 > 0:15:52When I go out, if I'm on the street, go shopping or anything,
0:15:52 > 0:15:55it's like he knew when I was coming, he would get the kettle on,
0:15:55 > 0:15:58and he would say, "Here you are."
0:15:58 > 0:16:02I said, "How do you know that?" He says, "I can sense you coming."
0:16:02 > 0:16:08He was a very kind gentleman, he was a nice man. He looked after me.
0:16:08 > 0:16:10What is it that you really miss?
0:16:10 > 0:16:12I miss the company.
0:16:12 > 0:16:14Even just to have a kiss,
0:16:14 > 0:16:17or put your arm around him.
0:16:17 > 0:16:21I miss that a lot. Because he was a good cuddler.
0:16:23 > 0:16:26'It's been 18 months since Yuna's husband died.
0:16:26 > 0:16:29'But her loneliness is as intense as ever.'
0:16:30 > 0:16:33Is it particularly evenings that you struggle with?
0:16:33 > 0:16:35Daytime is bad,
0:16:35 > 0:16:37but night-time it's worse.
0:16:38 > 0:16:40It's really bad at night.
0:16:42 > 0:16:45Cos he would sit there, and I'm sitting here,
0:16:45 > 0:16:48and I'd be here reading,
0:16:48 > 0:16:50and we talk in the meantime.
0:16:50 > 0:16:53So it's like, coming in here now...
0:16:54 > 0:16:57I hardly ever used it,
0:16:57 > 0:17:01because it was too much to sit in here by myself.
0:17:01 > 0:17:04So I'd sit in the kitchen instead.
0:17:06 > 0:17:09I just feel as if,
0:17:09 > 0:17:11oh...
0:17:11 > 0:17:16It's so empty, the house. It's as if you talk and you can hear the echo.
0:17:17 > 0:17:19'Even with family and friends nearby,
0:17:19 > 0:17:24'Yuna has found it hard to cope with her grief.'
0:17:24 > 0:17:26You have no reason to go on.
0:17:27 > 0:17:30There's no reason in your life any more.
0:17:30 > 0:17:35It's like you've got no reason to even cook, or eat.
0:17:35 > 0:17:37It's like, "What am I living for?"
0:17:37 > 0:17:41You know. So, it's like... a big void.
0:17:41 > 0:17:42Like...
0:17:43 > 0:17:48I can't even explain, it's emptiness that's inside you. It's hollow.
0:17:52 > 0:17:57Nobody can tell you how it feels. Really feels.
0:17:57 > 0:17:59Cos there's no word to express it.
0:18:03 > 0:18:06Everything is just dark.
0:18:09 > 0:18:11As if you're going through a tunnel.
0:18:12 > 0:18:15And you're never going to see the end...
0:18:15 > 0:18:21of the tunnel. It's just dark. Everything is closed in on you.
0:18:21 > 0:18:26And you're just going, going, going and there's no way out.
0:18:32 > 0:18:35It's really difficult listening to stories from Yuna,
0:18:35 > 0:18:39and to really see the heartbreak that she's going through,
0:18:39 > 0:18:43and I've got to be honest - right now I haven't got an answer.
0:18:44 > 0:18:47If indeed there ever could be an answer.
0:18:50 > 0:18:54One thing I do know about Yuna is that she is active in her church.
0:18:54 > 0:18:56She can cook, sew and is a wonderful,
0:18:56 > 0:18:59warm person with a big heart.
0:19:03 > 0:19:07Nothing, of course, could bring back Yuna's husband or fill that hole
0:19:07 > 0:19:09she keeps telling me about.
0:19:09 > 0:19:12But I reckon Yuna could also help other people.
0:19:12 > 0:19:14And that just might do her some good too.
0:19:16 > 0:19:20There are numerous charities around the UK that are involved with
0:19:20 > 0:19:22loneliness and its effects.
0:19:22 > 0:19:26So our intention is to bring together some of those organisations
0:19:26 > 0:19:29and as many locals as Denise managed to rustle up this morning.
0:19:30 > 0:19:33Well, I've done all the door knocking I could possibly do today.
0:19:33 > 0:19:35Let's just hope everyone turns up.
0:19:35 > 0:19:38And what better place to meet than their local community centre,
0:19:38 > 0:19:40run by Ann Guest MBE?
0:19:41 > 0:19:43- Hello!- Hello!
0:19:43 > 0:19:45- Ann? I'm Denise.- It is. Hello, Denise.
0:19:45 > 0:19:49- So this really is like the hub of the community.- Yes.
0:19:49 > 0:19:52It's quite impressive. I don't actually remember it being here.
0:19:52 > 0:19:54Cos I lived here.
0:19:54 > 0:19:59- It wasn't here.- It wasn't? - No, this was opened in 1994.
0:19:59 > 0:20:01Ah. Oh, wow!
0:20:01 > 0:20:05- This is bigger than I thought. - We really need this sort of place
0:20:05 > 0:20:08for the elderly, really. There's a lot of loneliness out there.
0:20:08 > 0:20:12You've got them out of their shell, in here.
0:20:12 > 0:20:16We don't turn anybody away, you know, we welcome whoever they are.
0:20:16 > 0:20:20And we're still going, 20 years on.
0:20:20 > 0:20:22So we're doing something right, are we not?
0:20:22 > 0:20:26- You've really created a sense of legacy and ownership.- Yes.
0:20:26 > 0:20:29- And a lot of people got involved in this.- Oh, they did.
0:20:29 > 0:20:34- The community wanted it.- Very much so. Never been vandalised, ever.
0:20:34 > 0:20:36Now that says something to me, doesn't it?
0:20:36 > 0:20:41Because the community were involved, everybody round here were involved.
0:20:41 > 0:20:44And why do you do it? What, why... What drives you
0:20:44 > 0:20:47- to be here every day? - Well, I do care for people.
0:20:48 > 0:20:54And I don't like seeing people who are lonely and sad.
0:20:54 > 0:20:58Cos as you get older you lose your friends, don't you?
0:20:58 > 0:21:02So, yes, I'm here to help people, with my team.
0:21:03 > 0:21:05And I'll tell you now, I love it here, you know.
0:21:05 > 0:21:07Because there's a lot of security.
0:21:07 > 0:21:10And everybody looks out for everybody else.
0:21:11 > 0:21:15Some charities like Silver Line are designed specifically to
0:21:15 > 0:21:18combat loneliness but sometimes loneliness is a symptom
0:21:18 > 0:21:23of other issues. It could be a lack of confidence or motivation.
0:21:23 > 0:21:27And sometimes getting involved in a charity that helps others can
0:21:27 > 0:21:30make a huge difference to your own circumstances.
0:21:33 > 0:21:36Changing Lives is a national charity and I've invited them
0:21:36 > 0:21:41along with other local organisations today to meet some of the residents.
0:21:41 > 0:21:43So, Nicola, tell me about the organisation.
0:21:43 > 0:21:46I work for a national charity called Changing Lives.
0:21:46 > 0:21:49We support vulnerable people, thousands of vulnerable people
0:21:49 > 0:21:52every month to make positive changes in their lives.
0:21:52 > 0:21:56We offer a space for women to come in, develop friendships,
0:21:56 > 0:21:58to access new activities, new groups -
0:21:58 > 0:22:02whether that's a shared community lunch where people are sitting
0:22:02 > 0:22:04and eating together and sharing their experiences.
0:22:04 > 0:22:06Whether it's a parent and toddler group,
0:22:06 > 0:22:09whether it's a confidence-building group, whether it's a group
0:22:09 > 0:22:13that are looking at rewriting their CVs to help them get back into work.
0:22:13 > 0:22:17And here in Wolverhampton you kind of pinpoint a certain group -
0:22:17 > 0:22:20- women, particularly.- Yeah, we're a women's centre in Wolverhampton
0:22:20 > 0:22:24and, for us, we're that space where women can come in,
0:22:24 > 0:22:27start to make changes which then go back and influence the rest of their
0:22:27 > 0:22:31families and their communities. But 99% of what we do in the centre
0:22:31 > 0:22:33is targeting women and their families.
0:22:37 > 0:22:38Nicola's come to the event
0:22:38 > 0:22:40which seems to be filling up rather nicely.
0:22:45 > 0:22:46- Nice to meet you. - Lovely to meet you.
0:22:46 > 0:22:48We've been on the same street...
0:22:52 > 0:22:56It's going really well in there. Everyone's talking, making friends.
0:22:56 > 0:22:58Some meeting for the first time, which is brilliant.
0:22:58 > 0:23:00So I'm going to go back in there.
0:23:03 > 0:23:06- This is your son?- Yes, Sebastian.
0:23:06 > 0:23:08- Nice to meet you.- Lovely to see you.
0:23:08 > 0:23:11It was good for these guys to go, otherwise I wouldn't have known you.
0:23:11 > 0:23:13No, it's true.
0:23:13 > 0:23:15Right, this is my son and this is my wife.
0:23:15 > 0:23:17You may have seen my wife before, I think you have.
0:23:17 > 0:23:20I'm the guy you normally see walking down the street with a basketball.
0:23:20 > 0:23:23- That's me.- Yeah, I've seen you.
0:23:23 > 0:23:26- I'm Gillian.- Good to meet you. - This is a serious turnout, isn't it?
0:23:26 > 0:23:29- Look at that.- It's been brilliant, really fantastic.
0:23:29 > 0:23:31You've been knocking on a lot of doors, haven't you?
0:23:31 > 0:23:34- I've done my best.- What an amazing place.- This is Ann.- Ann?- Ann.
0:23:34 > 0:23:37- Nice to meet you, Ann. - And she helps...
0:23:37 > 0:23:40- You help run this place, don't you? - I do.- I've been meeting some people
0:23:40 > 0:23:44on my journey. One in particular I want you to meet.
0:23:44 > 0:23:48Because I think she'll benefit from this place amazingly well.
0:23:48 > 0:23:51But also has some amazing skills that I think would benefit
0:23:51 > 0:23:53- a lot of the people that come here. - That's nice.
0:23:53 > 0:23:56- Can I introduce you to her?- You can, feel free.- Follow me.
0:23:57 > 0:24:00- Yuna, Ann. Now... - Hello, Ann.- Hello. Nice to meet you.
0:24:00 > 0:24:04Introduce yourselves. You know, with your experience and stuff like that you might be able
0:24:04 > 0:24:08- to help out here.- Oh, yes, we have parties here.- I'll leave you...
0:24:08 > 0:24:10Yes, thank you.
0:24:10 > 0:24:12It's really about finding what's going on for you -
0:24:12 > 0:24:15where you want to go - and seeing if we can help support you with that.
0:24:15 > 0:24:18And we offer volunteer opportunities as well. So if, you know,
0:24:18 > 0:24:20you were interested in volunteering with families or children
0:24:20 > 0:24:25- that might be something you'd be interested in developing. - Sounds good, yeah.
0:24:25 > 0:24:28It's all, "Do you like cake?" And if you tick "Yes", then you're in.
0:24:28 > 0:24:29It's got to be a yes then, hasn't it?
0:24:29 > 0:24:33- LAUGHTER Yeah, you're in.- You don't know what's round the corner, really.
0:24:33 > 0:24:36It's quite refreshing that there's still people out there,
0:24:36 > 0:24:38you know, that are able to come together
0:24:38 > 0:24:42and bring their skills together and their stories together.
0:24:42 > 0:24:45Do you do music sessions and things like that as well?
0:24:45 > 0:24:46Oh, that's a good one!
0:24:46 > 0:24:48Yeah.
0:24:48 > 0:24:51You can go to a folk night but it's nice if there's something during
0:24:51 > 0:24:55- the day as well. - That's a good idea. Jot it down!
0:24:55 > 0:24:58Excellent. Thank you.
0:24:58 > 0:25:00See, I can't sew. I couldn't...
0:25:00 > 0:25:02If I sort of get the patchwork going, it could carry on
0:25:02 > 0:25:04and then the next week...
0:25:04 > 0:25:06And they won't be under pressure, would they?
0:25:06 > 0:25:08- No, they take it home if they want to.- Yes.
0:25:08 > 0:25:11- They can leave it. - That would be great.
0:25:11 > 0:25:15And we'll have to set this up ASAP. I'm sure it would go down well.
0:25:15 > 0:25:20- And I'm sure it would.- OK. - But we need your expertise, really.
0:25:20 > 0:25:22LAUGHTER
0:25:22 > 0:25:24- ..covers, things like that. - Cushions.
0:25:24 > 0:25:26- SHE LAUGHS - That room is buzzing at the moment.- Oh...
0:25:26 > 0:25:28And I haven't seen that before. It's just...
0:25:28 > 0:25:31Yeah, an amazing atmosphere in there as well.
0:25:31 > 0:25:34Yeah. There's one gentleman in there, I'm not sure if you've seen him -
0:25:34 > 0:25:37but he's new and felt very much alone.
0:25:37 > 0:25:40And I've just seen him chatting away, laughing.
0:25:40 > 0:25:42So I think it's been a job well done.
0:25:42 > 0:25:44We've not quite finished yet, so let's carry on.
0:25:47 > 0:25:50On the surface, it appears to have been a great success
0:25:50 > 0:25:53but how has Jules found meeting new people?
0:25:53 > 0:25:57More than I expected really, it's been a fantastic opportunity.
0:25:58 > 0:26:02It's easy to say that you are this island, that you are by yourself,
0:26:02 > 0:26:06but when you meet other people and you listen to their situation,
0:26:06 > 0:26:09it does put your life in perspective.
0:26:09 > 0:26:13I sincerely hope that Jules benefits long term from this experience
0:26:13 > 0:26:16and builds relationships from the people she has met here today.
0:26:17 > 0:26:18And as for Yuna...
0:26:23 > 0:26:25Well, she has already begun a new venture,
0:26:25 > 0:26:28helping out at the very same centre.
0:26:28 > 0:26:32- This is my own. I made it myself. - Oh, this is nice.
0:26:32 > 0:26:38- This is your personal...- This is my personal, yes.- Personal possession?
0:26:38 > 0:26:42- Yes.- Oh, this is nice.- And this was sewn all by hand except for the stitches around it.
0:26:42 > 0:26:45Now she's passing on her needlework skills to other
0:26:45 > 0:26:49ladies from the local community at a patchwork-making class.
0:26:49 > 0:26:52- You pinch the edges.- Oh!
0:26:54 > 0:26:58I'll try another one, I'll see if I find one a little bit bigger.
0:26:58 > 0:27:01'They are very good girls to hang out with because they
0:27:01 > 0:27:05'have different experience and some of them is not just lonely because
0:27:05 > 0:27:09'they have lost loved ones but they are lonely because they are
0:27:09 > 0:27:13'living on their own, they haven't got other relatives to be around.'
0:27:13 > 0:27:18And they are people who travel as well. So we have a lot in common.
0:27:19 > 0:27:24'It helps my loneliness a lot because I know I'm going out each day
0:27:24 > 0:27:27'and I'm helping somebody along the way.'
0:27:27 > 0:27:28Life is for living.
0:27:30 > 0:27:33'My husband passed away, yes. But I'm still alive.
0:27:33 > 0:27:35'I'm still here and it helps to'
0:27:35 > 0:27:37cheer me as well.
0:27:37 > 0:27:41Making me happy to know I'm doing something to help somebody.
0:27:41 > 0:27:43- Oh, the green hotel along the way? - Uh-huh.
0:27:43 > 0:27:45That great big... Oh, I love that, it's gorgeous.
0:27:45 > 0:27:48- Oh, you want to go there, girl. - That's lovely.
0:27:48 > 0:27:50'I will come back and help them'
0:27:50 > 0:27:54because they won't know how to finish it, so...
0:27:54 > 0:27:57And we want to see it on display.
0:27:57 > 0:27:58So that would be nice.
0:28:01 > 0:28:04My trip to Wolverhampton has taught me a lot.
0:28:04 > 0:28:10- Firstly, loneliness can hit anyone. - I think it's just to do with...
0:28:12 > 0:28:16- ..love, actually.- Busy people who we come across every day in our lives
0:28:16 > 0:28:18could be suffering from loneliness.
0:28:18 > 0:28:20And we really don't know anything about it.
0:28:20 > 0:28:25Nobody can tell you how it feels, really feels.
0:28:25 > 0:28:28Cos there's no word to express it.
0:28:28 > 0:28:30And just because people are lonely doesn't mean
0:28:30 > 0:28:33they can't be great company, given the chance.