A Matter of Life and Death

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0:00:02 > 0:00:06This programme contains strong language

0:00:06 > 0:00:11and scenes which some viewers may find upsetting.

0:00:12 > 0:00:15This is the Sandhurst allotment.

0:00:17 > 0:00:21We've got a generation with a lot of problems.

0:00:21 > 0:00:23It's a very difficult time to live.

0:00:23 > 0:00:26If you're between 18-26 at the moment,

0:00:26 > 0:00:29you are probably unemployed, that's the first thing.

0:00:30 > 0:00:35What we've pulled into Sandhurst is genuinely the very best,

0:00:35 > 0:00:37I believe, of that generation.

0:00:37 > 0:00:41- Get going!- But I wonder sometimes what motivates them.

0:00:41 > 0:00:45- Get over him!- Get to the fight! Get moving!

0:00:45 > 0:00:49Fucking move! Go, go. Get down!

0:00:51 > 0:00:52Get over him!

0:00:52 > 0:00:54I feel for some people who come here,

0:00:54 > 0:00:58and they are here because their father and grandfather

0:00:58 > 0:00:59were in the regiment.

0:00:59 > 0:01:03It's an automatic assumption they would come, and they are not suited to the place.

0:01:03 > 0:01:05On your back! On your face!

0:01:05 > 0:01:08It's a shame they're not weeded out before they get in the gates.

0:01:08 > 0:01:12But there are some people's whose hearts simply aren't in it.

0:01:12 > 0:01:14They'd suit something other than the military.

0:01:16 > 0:01:18The worst thing that could happen

0:01:18 > 0:01:21is they go out to Afghanistan and hesitate.

0:01:21 > 0:01:24Something goes wrong, and they don't want to act.

0:01:24 > 0:01:28Or they break down and suddenly get a sort of stab of conscience

0:01:28 > 0:01:30that says, I shouldn't be here.

0:01:30 > 0:01:33- ALL CHANT:- Kill! Kill! Kill! Kill!

0:01:33 > 0:01:37Oxford Sandy & Blacks, an outstanding pig -

0:01:37 > 0:01:39very good for pork and bacon.

0:01:39 > 0:01:42Kill! Kill! Kill! Kill! Kill! Kill!

0:01:49 > 0:01:52- On guard!- On guard!

0:01:52 > 0:01:57As you can see there, he placed one foot forward in a boxing stance.

0:01:57 > 0:02:01The knees are bent. That allows his centre of gravity to be lowered

0:02:01 > 0:02:03and more easily controlled.

0:02:03 > 0:02:06OK? The bayonet is pointing towards the enemy.

0:02:06 > 0:02:09As you can see, there's a large amount of steel

0:02:09 > 0:02:12and determination in his eyes to kill that enemy.

0:02:12 > 0:02:13- ALL:- On guard!

0:02:13 > 0:02:17- Rubbish! Squad rank - on guard! - On...

0:02:17 > 0:02:19Wow, wow.

0:02:23 > 0:02:25What's your name?

0:02:25 > 0:02:27- Officer Thompson, sir.- Mr Thompson, I've got lock on you.

0:02:27 > 0:02:30You need to get a grip of your skinny body and show me

0:02:30 > 0:02:34that you've got some aggression because at this moment in time...

0:02:34 > 0:02:38At this moment in time you are not impressing me at all.

0:02:38 > 0:02:41Kill! Kill! Kill! Kill! Kill!

0:02:44 > 0:02:46I've got lock on.

0:02:46 > 0:02:50- Kill! Kill! Kill! - HE BLOWS WHISTLE

0:02:50 > 0:02:53It's funny what we're doing here, isn't it?

0:02:53 > 0:02:57You're on the range, it's funny. What is funny about an 18-year-old

0:02:57 > 0:02:59or possibly yourself going through a door

0:02:59 > 0:03:02and thrusting a bayonet through somebody's ribcage,

0:03:02 > 0:03:04standing on their throat, looking at them dying

0:03:04 > 0:03:08withdrawing the bayonet, and going on and killing the next person?

0:03:08 > 0:03:11- What is funny about that? ALL:- Nothing, Sergeant.

0:03:11 > 0:03:13Duty commanders!

0:03:13 > 0:03:16You don't understand what you are going to be asked to do.

0:03:16 > 0:03:18That person that goes through the door may die.

0:03:18 > 0:03:22And it's going to be you that sends him through the door.

0:03:22 > 0:03:25And at this moment in time you are stood there, marking time,

0:03:25 > 0:03:27not giving a shit.

0:03:29 > 0:03:32- You're a fucking embarrassment! - Motivators, get out of my way.

0:03:32 > 0:03:34I've had enough.

0:03:34 > 0:03:36Go.

0:03:36 > 0:03:38Munch, all yours.

0:03:52 > 0:03:56Is there anybody in here who did not volunteer to join the army?

0:03:56 > 0:04:00Don't ever be under any illusion,

0:04:00 > 0:04:02you are volunteers, you want to be here.

0:04:02 > 0:04:06It's the army now.

0:04:06 > 0:04:10You have to remember that you are leaders of men and women.

0:04:10 > 0:04:15That you will be required to give orders but, more importantly,

0:04:15 > 0:04:17ensure that those orders are carried out.

0:04:17 > 0:04:20Doing that has its own moral implications,

0:04:20 > 0:04:22especially when you, through your words,

0:04:22 > 0:04:27your orders and your actions put another person's life in jeopardy.

0:04:27 > 0:04:31We've all got this heroic self-sacrifice mentality.

0:04:31 > 0:04:35"I'd lay down my life for Queen and country."

0:04:35 > 0:04:40When it comes to laying somebody else's life down for Queen and country,

0:04:40 > 0:04:42you have to live with that for the rest of your days.

0:04:42 > 0:04:45That can be really painful.

0:04:45 > 0:04:48Yet it is what the army is asking of you.

0:04:48 > 0:04:52To be of a strong enough character and leader

0:04:52 > 0:04:55to be able to fulfil orders

0:04:55 > 0:05:00that no right-thinking person would want to fulfil.

0:05:00 > 0:05:05And then carry on after that. It's an awesome responsibility.

0:05:05 > 0:05:07If you're not ready for that, then go pack your bags

0:05:07 > 0:05:12because in Afghanistan you'll be facing that sort of dilemma. OK?

0:05:20 > 0:05:22I've got quite a big history with the army.

0:05:22 > 0:05:26- My father, my grandfather, great grandfather.- Yeah.

0:05:26 > 0:05:30To have to pull out... I think to be able to do that

0:05:30 > 0:05:33and facing up to that as well would be a huge challenge,

0:05:33 > 0:05:37and a challenge I would not like to experience, I have to say.

0:05:37 > 0:05:41They say 80% of people start Sandhurst with a girlfriend

0:05:41 > 0:05:44and 20% of people smoke.

0:05:44 > 0:05:47By the time you leave, 20% of people have girlfriends

0:05:47 > 0:05:49and 80% smoke. So...

0:05:49 > 0:05:50It kind of works with

0:05:50 > 0:05:54the statistics really, doesn't it?

0:05:54 > 0:05:58We did have a lot of conversations when I came back that leave weekend.

0:05:58 > 0:06:02She didn't just dump me by text, it's not quite that tragic.

0:06:05 > 0:06:08They've got to be strong before you come here otherwise

0:06:08 > 0:06:10they're not really going to last two minutes,

0:06:10 > 0:06:14not that that was a dig or anything in any way.

0:06:14 > 0:06:19But, you know... I haven't spoken to my girlfriend since,

0:06:19 > 0:06:22what day is it today? Friday today. We usually speak every day.

0:06:22 > 0:06:25I haven't spoke to her... Tuesday was the last time I spoke to her.

0:06:25 > 0:06:29By the time I come back she's in bed. I just haven't got the time.

0:06:29 > 0:06:33If you've got problems or if you've got a needy bird

0:06:33 > 0:06:37and you've got to be constantly ringing her and giving her attention,

0:06:37 > 0:06:40it's never going to work. But...

0:06:40 > 0:06:42Yeah, it definitely puts a strain on it.

0:06:42 > 0:06:45I suppose girls are different from boys.

0:06:45 > 0:06:47They need a little bit more attention.

0:06:47 > 0:06:51You can't just pick them up and leave them where you left off like your mates.

0:06:51 > 0:06:56It's like a plant you've got to keep watering.

0:06:56 > 0:06:58He's like my Sandhurst dad.

0:06:58 > 0:07:01HE LAUGHS

0:07:01 > 0:07:05All I get is advice and help through everything. Great.

0:07:15 > 0:07:19- Guys.- You are mad, you are just doing work for yourselves.

0:07:19 > 0:07:22Toes and heels - that's all we're after.

0:07:22 > 0:07:25That's a simple instruction, isn't it?

0:07:26 > 0:07:28I came in and saw the telly

0:07:28 > 0:07:32and saw that these terrorist attacks had happened.

0:07:32 > 0:07:34And I felt it quite personally.

0:07:34 > 0:07:38I felt like it was an attack on UK and UK values.

0:07:38 > 0:07:42And... Maybe that's what I'm fighting for.

0:07:42 > 0:07:48It's not patriotism so much as liberalism.

0:07:48 > 0:07:50I despise the idea that people think that

0:07:50 > 0:07:53they should be able to take it away from us.

0:07:53 > 0:07:56You're not in it for the medals,

0:07:56 > 0:07:58but the Afghan one means more,

0:07:58 > 0:08:00without a shadow of a doubt.

0:08:00 > 0:08:04You certainly know that you earned that one.

0:08:04 > 0:08:07'I would like to go to Afghanistan

0:08:07 > 0:08:10'because I think it's the job that you're signing up for now.'

0:08:10 > 0:08:15Even Sandhurst, which is a bastion of tradition and all this stuff,

0:08:15 > 0:08:18is changing its syllabus because of Afghanistan.

0:08:18 > 0:08:21It's the challenge of our generation, really.

0:08:23 > 0:08:27I think two squadrons are going out in 2013.

0:08:27 > 0:08:29Maybe in the same brigade as the Welsh Guards.

0:08:29 > 0:08:32- Does that make you nervous? - Yeah, it does.- Terrified.

0:08:32 > 0:08:36You think about it with the amount of training that you have now.

0:08:36 > 0:08:41We made a bit of a mess of our last platoon attack.

0:08:41 > 0:08:44But you think about, oh, yeah, when I get to Afghanistan.

0:08:44 > 0:08:49If you took on the Taliban with the skills and drills like that...

0:08:49 > 0:08:52You know, you'd do the honest thing and just shoot yourself, I think.

0:08:52 > 0:08:55We've got such a long way to go to get to that stage

0:08:55 > 0:08:59where we can confidently get to our platoon, our troop,

0:08:59 > 0:09:01our chosen regiments

0:09:01 > 0:09:04and lead them with all the qualities that is expected

0:09:04 > 0:09:07of an officer coming out of Sandhurst.

0:09:19 > 0:09:24This is a video someone was saying about, um...

0:09:24 > 0:09:28an Iraqi sniper in Baghdad.

0:09:28 > 0:09:34He's filmed all of his kills as he's done them...

0:09:34 > 0:09:38and put them into this horrible video.

0:09:38 > 0:09:41You can see why they do it.

0:09:41 > 0:09:44The effect is twofold.

0:09:44 > 0:09:47It puts fear into soldiers operating in an environment

0:09:47 > 0:09:50where they know there's a sniper, so you never feel comfortable.

0:09:50 > 0:09:54You're seeing them soldiers and they are just on top.

0:09:54 > 0:09:57- It's pretty disgusting. - They're not really expecting it,

0:09:57 > 0:10:00which is the whole nature of a sniper threat.

0:10:00 > 0:10:03And then bang, from nowhere.

0:10:07 > 0:10:12And by filming it they can just show it worldwide.

0:10:12 > 0:10:16Little potential jihadists can sit there on their internet,

0:10:16 > 0:10:23whether they be in Kabul, Baghdad, Whitechapel.

0:10:23 > 0:10:26It's just propaganda, isn't it?

0:10:26 > 0:10:30In the same way that they might see us as watching

0:10:30 > 0:10:33Ross Kemp in Afghanistan as propaganda, but you don't see us

0:10:33 > 0:10:37filming down our sniper scopes, picking off Taliban.

0:10:40 > 0:10:43That's how they fight. So fucking let 'em.

0:10:54 > 0:10:58When I was about 14, my father died. I was the oldest child.

0:10:58 > 0:11:03I kind of thought, "That's it, I've got to man up."

0:11:03 > 0:11:06And then the whole careers liaison guy came in

0:11:06 > 0:11:09and I kind of thought, "Well,

0:11:09 > 0:11:12"if Dad's not around, I've got to go and sort my life out

0:11:12 > 0:11:14"and grow up a bit."

0:11:14 > 0:11:19So I've known what I've wanted to do for a long time.

0:11:33 > 0:11:37What I really want to identify in this meeting

0:11:37 > 0:11:38is those who are in the bottom third

0:11:38 > 0:11:41who we don't think are going to get out of the bottom third

0:11:41 > 0:11:43and aren't going to make it.

0:11:43 > 0:11:47Those we need to red flag towards the college commander now.

0:11:53 > 0:11:56Mr Barnes, I like Mr Barnes very much.

0:11:56 > 0:11:59He's kind of a "what you see is what you get" kind of guy.

0:11:59 > 0:12:02And what you see is a sort of professional front, which is good.

0:12:02 > 0:12:04But I think he could still give a bit more,

0:12:04 > 0:12:06I think he's holding back a bit.

0:12:06 > 0:12:10OK, we've got the curtains half-closed in here, Mr Barnes.

0:12:10 > 0:12:13That says to me that you feel that you are still in bed.

0:12:13 > 0:12:16Get in here now. Get in bed, get in your bed.

0:12:16 > 0:12:19You want to be in bed cos your curtains are still fucking drawn.

0:12:19 > 0:12:24That says to me that you are still tired. Get in bed. OK.

0:12:24 > 0:12:28- Why are your curtains still drawn? - Not sure. I've no excuse, Sergeant.

0:12:28 > 0:12:30Stand to attention while you are in bed. OK.

0:12:30 > 0:12:34- So that end, curtains should be wide open. Understand? - Yes, Colour Sergeant.

0:12:34 > 0:12:38- Sudworth was next. - I think he's quite wet.

0:12:38 > 0:12:42I don't think he's a particular team player up in the lines.

0:12:42 > 0:12:46I think I'll put "hardly inspirational" down.

0:12:46 > 0:12:49Have you been shaving your pubic area with this razor?

0:12:49 > 0:12:51I'm pretty sure I haven't, Sergeant.

0:12:51 > 0:12:54Well, it's got ginger pubes in it, OK, and you're ginger,

0:12:54 > 0:12:59so that end requires to be removed from the razor.

0:12:59 > 0:13:00Yes, Colour Sergeant.

0:13:00 > 0:13:07Mr Thompson with a P. He's a good guy, he's fit.

0:13:07 > 0:13:10He's got an opinion as well, which I quite like. He doesn't...

0:13:10 > 0:13:13He's top third material, not middle third.

0:13:13 > 0:13:16By which he actually has a voice and he uses it, which is good.

0:13:16 > 0:13:18He needs to understand how much he can deliver

0:13:18 > 0:13:21into the platoon and the platoon dynamics.

0:13:21 > 0:13:24I think he doesn't have much military experience,

0:13:24 > 0:13:27he's been electrician for four years beforehand.

0:13:27 > 0:13:29He was putting himself down and I just said,

0:13:29 > 0:13:31hey, listen, these are skills.

0:13:31 > 0:13:35You've got some good life experience, it will be really handy.

0:13:35 > 0:13:37So share it around.

0:13:37 > 0:13:40Mr Mansel Lewis. Disappointing knowledge.

0:13:40 > 0:13:45Before that he hadn't actually been doing too badly in camp.

0:13:45 > 0:13:48So we'll see where that leaves him.

0:13:48 > 0:13:52Where's your cold weather boots, Mr Mansel Lewis?

0:13:52 > 0:13:55They are in the left-hand corner of my...

0:13:55 > 0:13:57Where's your second set of boots?

0:14:01 > 0:14:04- Erm...- You're wearing both of them? - No, Colour Sergeant.

0:14:04 > 0:14:07So where's your other set of boots?

0:14:07 > 0:14:10All the boots that I was issued are in the wardrobe, Colour Sergeant.

0:14:10 > 0:14:14So you are telling me you've only been issued one set of combat eyes

0:14:14 > 0:14:17and one set of cold weather?

0:14:17 > 0:14:20They haven't gone anywhere, Colour Sergeant,

0:14:20 > 0:14:22I think that's what I must have been issued.

0:14:22 > 0:14:27Right. Yours... That's why - cos they are in your fucking bag!

0:14:27 > 0:14:32Lying to me, telling me you've not been issued them and they are inside your black bag.

0:14:32 > 0:14:34Sorry, I've got confused, Colour Sergeant.

0:14:34 > 0:14:36It doesn't take much to confuse you, did it?

0:14:36 > 0:14:39- No, Colour Sergeant.- What will you be like in the heat of battle

0:14:39 > 0:14:42when rounds are around your feet, casualties taken,

0:14:42 > 0:14:44an enemy who's coming at you?

0:14:44 > 0:14:47- Are you going to be confused then? - No, Colour Sergeant.

0:14:47 > 0:14:50- We can't afford to be confused, can we?- No, Colour Sergeant.

0:14:50 > 0:14:53'I think the reason why I joined the Army is because'

0:14:53 > 0:14:55I wanted to be in an environment

0:14:55 > 0:14:59where people were motivated by leadership

0:14:59 > 0:15:02and not necessarily by money so much.

0:15:02 > 0:15:05My grandfather served in the Welsh Guards.

0:15:05 > 0:15:08Yes, family history is important to me.

0:15:08 > 0:15:10Bring your aide memoire.

0:15:18 > 0:15:21Guys, did you all read this?

0:15:21 > 0:15:24The journal of a chap called Mark Evison.

0:15:24 > 0:15:27He was an impeccable officer.

0:15:27 > 0:15:30He is someone we should all aspire to be like.

0:15:30 > 0:15:34He hadn't long left this place, he'd been in theatre for four weeks,

0:15:34 > 0:15:37he was a new platoon commander before he was fatally wounded.

0:15:37 > 0:15:41From speaking to people in the Welsh Guards, the Academy man

0:15:41 > 0:15:47was the Battalion 2IC on operations. Company Sergeant Major knows him, Sergeant Buckley knows him.

0:15:47 > 0:15:50His decision-making was purely focused

0:15:50 > 0:15:52on the wellbeing of his troops.

0:15:52 > 0:15:55That's something we should all do all of the time,

0:15:55 > 0:15:57that is what selfless commitment is.

0:15:57 > 0:16:01Putting the good of those under your command first before yourself.

0:16:01 > 0:16:03OK?

0:16:03 > 0:16:07Fact, by the time you leave you'll be doing exactly the same.

0:16:07 > 0:16:11At times it's very tempting to take the easy option, Mr Mansel Lewis, isn't it?

0:16:11 > 0:16:15- Yes, sir.- Isn't it? It definitely is, but you can't.

0:16:15 > 0:16:20You're the platoon commander, they look up to you, work for you, you take them on operations.

0:16:20 > 0:16:23They want to know that you have their best interests at heart.

0:16:23 > 0:16:25It's definitely a good thing. Definitely.

0:16:25 > 0:16:28Mr Evison sat there in the front rank,

0:16:28 > 0:16:32and then I'm stood behind as Battalion second in command.

0:16:32 > 0:16:33In the second rank.

0:16:33 > 0:16:37As a battalion, we lost five individuals.

0:16:37 > 0:16:40Colonel Thorneloe, Major Burchill, Mr Evison,

0:16:40 > 0:16:41Lance Sergeant Tobie Fasfous

0:16:41 > 0:16:43and Dane Elson.

0:16:44 > 0:16:48The way I dealt with it was I just switched off emotionally

0:16:48 > 0:16:52and I just had to focus on what we were doing and concentrate on the blokes,

0:16:52 > 0:16:56and not let them switch off either, to be honest.

0:16:56 > 0:17:00There's eight people in this photo that went to Afghanistan

0:17:00 > 0:17:03that are currently now serving in the academy.

0:17:17 > 0:17:22It's the diary that Lieutenant Mark Evison started writing

0:17:22 > 0:17:25when he went out to Afghanistan with the Welsh Guards.

0:17:25 > 0:17:28We've all been told to read it.

0:17:28 > 0:17:31There's so much of the kind of things that we feel at Sandhurst.

0:17:31 > 0:17:37There's all those sort of insecurities that we have

0:17:37 > 0:17:39about commanding soldiers,

0:17:39 > 0:17:43and new experiences and these sorts of things.

0:17:43 > 0:17:47And also, he's got in here, he's quite Sandhurst fresh,

0:17:47 > 0:17:48this is his first tour,

0:17:48 > 0:17:51he's got his first contact in here, all this kind of thing.

0:17:51 > 0:17:57I didn't know him, but lots of my friends did.

0:17:57 > 0:18:01They all say that he was their best friend. Just a superb bloke.

0:18:03 > 0:18:09And all of his men adored him. They all called him 007.

0:18:09 > 0:18:11All the Welsh Guards senior command,

0:18:11 > 0:18:14they said he was the best junior officer in the battalion.

0:18:16 > 0:18:18There's a bit where he says,

0:18:18 > 0:18:21"It's rather like being on exercise except you don't know that

0:18:21 > 0:18:25"in five days' time a nice, warm coach is going to pick you up."

0:18:25 > 0:18:28At the back of your mind, if you stop and have a little moment

0:18:28 > 0:18:31and think, in a year's time I'd better know how to do this properly

0:18:31 > 0:18:35because if I can't... Those are real bullets, that's pretty scary.

0:18:35 > 0:18:38- Hold. Check. One, two.- All right.

0:18:38 > 0:18:40At the moment you are at a higher standard

0:18:40 > 0:18:43of overall basic admin within the block.

0:18:43 > 0:18:47So the reason I'm moving you is so you can bring Mr Acram on

0:18:47 > 0:18:50- and you can bring Mr Whitaker on. - OK, Sergeant.- Happy?- Yes.

0:18:50 > 0:18:54So it's not a punishment, all right, I'm not punishing you two.

0:18:54 > 0:18:57One, two, one, two. Left, right, left.

0:19:16 > 0:19:18- Morning, everybody.- Morning, sir.

0:19:18 > 0:19:22Welcome, a very warm welcome to Brookwood Military Cemetery.

0:19:22 > 0:19:25What I want to do very quickly at the outset is put this visit

0:19:25 > 0:19:29today into a bit of context for you.

0:19:29 > 0:19:33I spoke to you all in the Woolwich Hall a couple of weeks ago

0:19:33 > 0:19:37about what we term as the contract of unlimited liability.

0:19:37 > 0:19:43That notion that all of us in uniform consciously forgo

0:19:43 > 0:19:47some of the rights and freedoms that we would otherwise possibly have.

0:19:47 > 0:19:51And the far extension of that is the requirement potentially

0:19:51 > 0:19:54to kill or be killed.

0:19:54 > 0:19:57And one of thing I want you to do today

0:19:57 > 0:20:01is consider what all that means to you as individuals.

0:20:01 > 0:20:04And of course a place like Brookwood, a place like this,

0:20:04 > 0:20:08there's no better place to do it because of course here

0:20:08 > 0:20:12we see the graves of so many people who have given their lives.

0:20:12 > 0:20:16So have a good think about this business that you've decided

0:20:16 > 0:20:19to join, this wonderful profession of ours.

0:20:19 > 0:20:22And think about that contract of unlimited liability.

0:20:22 > 0:20:26Fall out and off you go with Brian. Thank you very much.

0:20:39 > 0:20:43'It just kind of made me think about the last time'

0:20:43 > 0:20:47I went to my dad's grave and had a look and...

0:20:47 > 0:20:52Just had a bit of time to reflect and just... Yeah.

0:20:52 > 0:20:56He died tragically in a train accident.

0:20:56 > 0:20:59He was hit by a train at a level crossing.

0:20:59 > 0:21:04And I was about...14? 13, 14?

0:21:04 > 0:21:07My parents had split up much younger

0:21:07 > 0:21:10and I was living with my stepfather, so we didn't see him

0:21:10 > 0:21:14as much as we would have done if he was at home.

0:21:14 > 0:21:18But he was still my dad, and it was just a massive shock.

0:21:22 > 0:21:26These are more recent burials up in this particular section.

0:21:26 > 0:21:33Afghanistan, Iraq. David Hicks, Mark Evison, Sean Birchall.

0:21:39 > 0:21:46Pertinent to me and I know some of the other DS here particularly,

0:21:46 > 0:21:49but I was serving on Op Herrick in Afghanistan

0:21:49 > 0:21:55as a company commander at the same time that these guys were killed.

0:21:56 > 0:22:00The only point I want to make, guys, is the stuff I've asked you

0:22:00 > 0:22:05to think about, I'm asking you to think about because it's real.

0:22:05 > 0:22:07And it's happening.

0:22:07 > 0:22:11And what we all need to do is be prepared for the moment

0:22:11 > 0:22:14when we as commanders need to deal with it.

0:22:14 > 0:22:20OK? And everyone deals with these sort of things in their own way.

0:22:20 > 0:22:22Those different ways of dealing with them

0:22:22 > 0:22:25have to be absolutely respected.

0:22:25 > 0:22:28But it will fall to you as commissioned officers...

0:22:30 > 0:22:35..to get over these kind of setbacks and get your people back on task.

0:22:54 > 0:22:56Just give me a minute.

0:22:56 > 0:23:00- Will you seek to heal the wounds of war?- We will.

0:23:00 > 0:23:04- Will you work for a just future for all humanity?- We will.

0:23:04 > 0:23:05Together we pray.

0:23:05 > 0:23:10ALL: Lord God our Father, we pledge ourselves to serve you

0:23:10 > 0:23:13and all humanity in the cause of peace,

0:23:13 > 0:23:18for the relief of wanton suffering, and for the praise of your name...

0:23:20 > 0:23:23It's nice to come here...

0:23:24 > 0:23:26Nice to come here.

0:23:26 > 0:23:31And just remember, to be honest. And appreciate what you've got.

0:23:33 > 0:23:36I had no idea his grave was there.

0:23:36 > 0:23:39I assumed he would be buried at home in a sort of...

0:23:39 > 0:23:41in a nearby churchyard,

0:23:41 > 0:23:44the nearest churchyard to his house.

0:23:44 > 0:23:47I assumed, it's obviously ignorance on my part

0:23:47 > 0:23:49because I thought if the same thing were to happen to me

0:23:49 > 0:23:52I'd be buried at home.

0:23:52 > 0:23:56We've got a churchyard, I can see it from the field behind my house.

0:23:56 > 0:23:59But no, he's at Brookwood, he's there.

0:24:01 > 0:24:02I was so unprepared.

0:24:16 > 0:24:21That's his diary, the brown baggie there.

0:24:21 > 0:24:25I was there on a visit, I visited the platoon for a couple of days.

0:24:29 > 0:24:31I took the photo one morning.

0:24:31 > 0:24:35We'd just had breakfast, had a brew, had a chat.

0:24:35 > 0:24:40This was Mark's little bed space.

0:24:40 > 0:24:42This was taken about a week or so

0:24:42 > 0:24:48before the incident that unfortunately took his life.

0:24:48 > 0:24:50HE SHOUTS ORDERS

0:24:50 > 0:24:52How do you spell his surname?

0:24:52 > 0:24:55- Just put "the death of a brave, young man."- OK.

0:24:56 > 0:24:58GUNFIRE ON VIDEO

0:25:00 > 0:25:03- 'Right, fucking get out quickly, mate.- Is that recording?- Yeah.'

0:25:03 > 0:25:06Lieutenant Mark Evison's platoon that morning

0:25:06 > 0:25:08came under contact from the Taliban.

0:25:08 > 0:25:12One of the guys in the patrol switched on a head cam.

0:25:12 > 0:25:15'They are firing straight down the road, it just hit the fucking wall.

0:25:15 > 0:25:19'That fucking wall. Right, change your magazine.'

0:25:23 > 0:25:26'They can fucking see us down that road.'

0:25:29 > 0:25:31GUNFIRE

0:25:37 > 0:25:40As soon as you hear them words, man down...

0:25:41 > 0:25:45Everyone quiet, listening, just try and monitor

0:25:45 > 0:25:49- and picture what was going on, on the ground.- 'Possible enemy.'

0:25:49 > 0:25:52It's not a game, is it, there's consequences.

0:25:52 > 0:25:54You kind of come here and it's...

0:25:54 > 0:25:58- It was something they specifically wanted to...- Selfless commitment.

0:25:58 > 0:26:00Selfless commitment, yeah.

0:26:02 > 0:26:04GUNFIRE ON VIDEO

0:26:04 > 0:26:07'You see, just at that compound straight ahead.

0:26:07 > 0:26:10'Right, they're moving the casualty now.'

0:26:13 > 0:26:18It was about 400 metres where he was shot, from the patrol base.

0:26:21 > 0:26:26The difficult thing that day for them was the guy that would have been co-ordinating it

0:26:26 > 0:26:29and controlling it all was the guy on the stretcher.

0:26:36 > 0:26:39They relate all the training to things like that.

0:26:39 > 0:26:43Even in PT we do stretcher races and stuff. You don't do a stretcher...

0:26:43 > 0:26:47- Find and carry. - You don't just do stretcher races because it's hard work.

0:26:47 > 0:26:51For shits and giggles, yeah, everything's for a reason.

0:26:54 > 0:26:58Initially I think they thought he was just shot in the shoulder.

0:26:58 > 0:27:03But I think the bullet had ricocheted and gone down into his body as well.

0:27:42 > 0:27:44- Poor fucker.- Hmmm.

0:27:46 > 0:27:48Pretty shit really, isn't it?

0:27:48 > 0:27:52If you read his journal, he was always worried about

0:27:52 > 0:27:56not having enough water and then in his journal,

0:27:56 > 0:28:01he makes the point he wanted to speak to his girlfriend and his mum,

0:28:01 > 0:28:07but as platoon commander, you're the last one to do that, you know?

0:28:07 > 0:28:12It's your blokes go first, so your blokes ring back. They're the priority.

0:28:12 > 0:28:17He just emphasised how much you have to commit, really.

0:28:17 > 0:28:23The more of these things we watch, the more videos we watch where people get killed,

0:28:23 > 0:28:28the more they tell us about it, the less, obviously it's still a massive thing,

0:28:28 > 0:28:32- but it partly desensitises you. - Yes.

0:28:32 > 0:28:38- Doesn't it put you off though? - No, because it is not really you, is it?

0:28:38 > 0:28:41- You hope. - That's what you joined up for.

0:28:41 > 0:28:46Everyone who joined up in the last 10 years knew that they were going to go on ops.

0:28:46 > 0:28:50And I think that's a big reason for joining.

0:28:52 > 0:28:54The amount of blood that he'd lost

0:28:54 > 0:28:58immediately told the guys that this is serious, to be honest with you.

0:28:59 > 0:29:02You could feel it, the emotion in the air.

0:29:02 > 0:29:05They loved him, they adored him.

0:29:05 > 0:29:10Effectively their leader had been taken away from them.

0:29:12 > 0:29:13I think he was 26 or 23.

0:29:13 > 0:29:18In the grand scheme of things, that's nothing really, is it,

0:29:18 > 0:29:19in terms of age difference?

0:29:21 > 0:29:23To see him at Brookwood,

0:29:23 > 0:29:26it was like someone had kicked me in the chest. I was...

0:29:27 > 0:29:33..I, I was so, I didn't know what to do with myself.

0:29:33 > 0:29:37I put my hands in my pockets in case I started shaking.

0:29:37 > 0:29:41I think he knew the risks. He must have known the risks.

0:29:41 > 0:29:43- INTERVIEWER:- Could you do that? - Could I do that?

0:29:43 > 0:29:46- Could I go to Afghanistan?- Mmm.

0:29:46 > 0:29:48Could you do what he did?

0:29:49 > 0:29:53- Um...- And take the risks he did? - I hope I would.

0:29:53 > 0:29:55I hope I'd be able to.

0:29:55 > 0:29:58But, I guess, he says it.

0:29:58 > 0:30:00I don't know.

0:30:02 > 0:30:04"How will I react with my first contact?

0:30:04 > 0:30:06"Will I freeze or prove my worth?

0:30:06 > 0:30:07"At the moment it's a waiting game

0:30:07 > 0:30:10"and until that moment comes, I can only speculate."

0:30:10 > 0:30:15That's said perfectly. I don't know. I hope I'd be able to.

0:30:15 > 0:30:16Um, but...

0:30:16 > 0:30:21you don't know until you reach that point, I don't think.

0:30:23 > 0:30:25It really brought home the concept

0:30:25 > 0:30:28of what it means to be an army officer.

0:30:28 > 0:30:32You sign the contract of ultimate liability,

0:30:32 > 0:30:36which means you agree to either put yourself into a situation

0:30:36 > 0:30:40where you may have to kill someone or be killed yourself.

0:30:40 > 0:30:43And for some people it becomes a reality.

0:30:43 > 0:30:47That's when you start weighing up what's most important in life.

0:30:47 > 0:30:48Is it your family?

0:30:48 > 0:30:50Is it your future or is it your army career,

0:30:50 > 0:30:52is it the commitment to your guys?

0:30:55 > 0:30:58As a leader, you should set the example.

0:30:58 > 0:31:02If you're not prepared to take the same risks

0:31:02 > 0:31:05as those use of your soldiers, under your command,

0:31:05 > 0:31:07then you are a coward.

0:31:08 > 0:31:11Those guys will start telling you war stories later on.

0:31:11 > 0:31:14We'll go to battlefield first aid.

0:31:14 > 0:31:16- Everyone's got their aide memoirs? - Yes.

0:31:16 > 0:31:20OK, Mr Barnes has been shot there, yes?

0:31:20 > 0:31:23We're going to open up the chest seal.

0:31:23 > 0:31:25Inside, it comes like this.

0:31:25 > 0:31:28You've got the flutter valve, which is this small valve here

0:31:28 > 0:31:31and then you've got the actual seal underneath.

0:31:31 > 0:31:34All we then do is place it on, right from there,

0:31:34 > 0:31:37so it's over the wound and all we're going to do then

0:31:37 > 0:31:39is fold it out, touching...

0:31:40 > 0:31:44..from the inside of the wound, outwards.

0:31:44 > 0:31:50'Life and death in certain situations is a role of the dice.'

0:31:51 > 0:31:56I'm a firm believer in fates and that my time's pre-ordained.

0:31:56 > 0:32:01And that I can't change the time or the place or wherever

0:32:01 > 0:32:04I might end up killed or whatever.

0:32:04 > 0:32:07We've got one lung this side of the body and one that side.

0:32:07 > 0:32:09'When my father did die,

0:32:09 > 0:32:14'that probably sparked off some kind of leadership flame inside me.'

0:32:14 > 0:32:17This will keep him alive for a longer period of time, OK?

0:32:17 > 0:32:19Everyone happy how to apply that?

0:32:26 > 0:32:29DRILL SERGEANT SHOUTING DISTANTLY

0:32:32 > 0:32:33GUNFIRE

0:32:46 > 0:32:50- Reardon's firing...- Coach. - Grey's coaching and I'm spotting.

0:32:53 > 0:32:57Ensure when you move to that full back position,

0:32:57 > 0:33:00your weapon keeps pointing down.

0:33:00 > 0:33:02GUNFIRE

0:33:25 > 0:33:28- Master Lewis.- Morning, sir. - Come on in.

0:33:28 > 0:33:30GUNFIRE

0:33:35 > 0:33:37Take a pew.

0:33:37 > 0:33:40So, this is what I think is happening,

0:33:40 > 0:33:43but then you need to tell me if it's changed.

0:33:43 > 0:33:47You came here having seen the Welsh Guards and they quite liked you.

0:33:47 > 0:33:50I think since you've been here you've realised that actually as an officer,

0:33:50 > 0:33:53you might well have to use your weapon system,

0:33:53 > 0:33:56yada, yada, yada, when you deploy on operations.

0:33:56 > 0:33:59I think maybe you're a little bit concerned by that.

0:33:59 > 0:34:02Yes, sir, that's definitely part of it, yes.

0:34:02 > 0:34:04What bit of it do you not like?

0:34:04 > 0:34:08It's something I'm confused about and I can't justify

0:34:08 > 0:34:13and I have spoken with my parents about this and, er...

0:34:15 > 0:34:21..they made the point that perhaps this isn't, this isn't an issue.

0:34:21 > 0:34:25It's just something that I'm looking at because I'm...

0:34:26 > 0:34:29..they were saying it's a natural thing to think about.

0:34:29 > 0:34:32It's my nature. I've learned a lot about myself.

0:34:32 > 0:34:36Certain strengths, obviously but also sensitivities as well

0:34:36 > 0:34:38and this is one of them.

0:34:38 > 0:34:41You have to fire one five round group

0:34:41 > 0:34:43at the white aiming marker

0:34:43 > 0:34:46from the kneeling or the squatting unsupported position.

0:34:46 > 0:34:50You're going to do your 44 weeks at Sandhurst,

0:34:50 > 0:34:53and if you do get infantry, you're going to go to Brecon

0:34:53 > 0:34:55training for up there for another three months,

0:34:55 > 0:34:59and then you're going to do more training obviously at battalion.

0:34:59 > 0:35:02What I suggest you do is battle on till the end of this term,

0:35:02 > 0:35:07- come back next term and then we'll have another chat then.- Yes.

0:35:07 > 0:35:08It will be fine.

0:35:08 > 0:35:11- OK. thank you. - All right, pleasure.

0:35:12 > 0:35:13GUNFIRE

0:35:13 > 0:35:15The irony is

0:35:15 > 0:35:18I'm actually a very good shot. HE LAUGHS

0:35:20 > 0:35:24Um, and Harbard who was in the next door pit said,

0:35:24 > 0:35:28"That'll be good when you need to shoot Afghan children, good."

0:35:30 > 0:35:32GUNFIRE

0:35:34 > 0:35:39It's not the sort of thing you can talk to everyone about because...

0:35:40 > 0:35:45..at the end of the day, that's the job you're here to do.

0:35:45 > 0:35:49And people who might not be prepared to give it a second thought,

0:35:49 > 0:35:51would automatically assume it was weakness.

0:35:53 > 0:35:54I don't think it is.

0:35:54 > 0:35:58I think it's important and I think really discussing it with yourself

0:35:58 > 0:36:01and coming to grips with it now actually shows a strength,

0:36:01 > 0:36:03that's what I think, personally.

0:36:03 > 0:36:05BUGLE

0:36:07 > 0:36:11I'm in the middle of writing a letter to my father. He's a vicar.

0:36:11 > 0:36:14He's an incredibly wise man and I've a lot of time for him.

0:36:14 > 0:36:17He's trying to talk me through the process,

0:36:17 > 0:36:22in what situations can you justify killing people?

0:36:22 > 0:36:23BUGLE

0:36:44 > 0:36:48The ceremony hasn't changed.

0:36:48 > 0:36:49I think the sentiments might change.

0:36:49 > 0:36:52The more experience you get, the more relevance it has.

0:36:52 > 0:36:55If it's something you've personally experienced,

0:36:55 > 0:36:59you've had operational experience and lost people operations,

0:36:59 > 0:37:03then of course it has a slightly more direct feel.

0:37:03 > 0:37:06But no, I think it has no requirement to change.

0:37:06 > 0:37:09I don't think it ever has and I hope it doesn't.

0:37:10 > 0:37:13It starts in the basis of sacrifice

0:37:13 > 0:37:16and that spans all conflicts that we've been involved in,

0:37:16 > 0:37:20but you clearly use your own personal experience

0:37:20 > 0:37:22and so Iraq and Afghanistan for me.

0:37:22 > 0:37:24ORGAN PLAYS

0:37:24 > 0:37:29# I vow to thee my country

0:37:29 > 0:37:33# All earthly things above... #

0:37:33 > 0:37:38Am I prepared to die for my country? Yes, I am.

0:37:39 > 0:37:43# ..the service of my love

0:37:45 > 0:37:49# A love that asks no questions... #

0:37:50 > 0:37:52Grenade!

0:37:55 > 0:37:58# That lays upon the altar

0:37:58 > 0:38:02# The dearest and the best...#

0:38:02 > 0:38:06Patriotism, there's something very stupid about patriotism,

0:38:06 > 0:38:07something quite blind.

0:38:07 > 0:38:10I think you have to find a better reason than that to be in the army.

0:38:12 > 0:38:15Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori.

0:38:15 > 0:38:19I mean, it's just been completely ridiculed.

0:38:19 > 0:38:25# A love that makes undaunted the final sacrifice. #

0:38:31 > 0:38:33War is horrible.

0:38:34 > 0:38:38Conflict is evil.

0:38:39 > 0:38:43Though unfortunately and sadly, sometimes necessary.

0:38:44 > 0:38:48But it's important to remember that even in the blackest hour

0:38:48 > 0:38:53amid fighting and fear, deeds of courage,

0:38:53 > 0:38:57bravery, loyalty and honour can and do shine through.

0:38:58 > 0:39:03Today, we gather in humility to honour the countless numbers

0:39:03 > 0:39:06who made the ultimate sacrifice.

0:39:06 > 0:39:11We commemorate and pray for all who have died in conflict.

0:39:11 > 0:39:16We remember especially those who have most recently

0:39:16 > 0:39:18laid down their lives in Afghanistan.

0:39:21 > 0:39:24Eternal rest grant unto them, oh Lord

0:39:24 > 0:39:27and let perpetual light shine upon them.

0:39:28 > 0:39:31May they rest in peace. Amen.

0:39:31 > 0:39:34CHORAL SINGING

0:39:42 > 0:39:46Some of you, if not most of you will be called upon

0:39:46 > 0:39:49to close with and kill the enemy.

0:39:49 > 0:39:5420% of soldiers in World War II used their personal weapon.

0:39:55 > 0:39:58By the time we got to Vietnam,

0:39:58 > 0:40:0095% of people use their personal weapon.

0:40:00 > 0:40:04I would suggest that is certainly where we're about in Afghanistan,

0:40:04 > 0:40:07or certainly that's the mind set you have to deploy with. OK?

0:40:07 > 0:40:10So if you think this is not your business,

0:40:10 > 0:40:14you are in the wrong organisation. It is everybody's business.

0:40:14 > 0:40:16And it is particularly prevalent

0:40:16 > 0:40:18because you are going out to command people.

0:40:18 > 0:40:23It is not simply just you closing with killing the enemy, it is people you lead.

0:40:23 > 0:40:26And they will expect you to have a very, very clear and moral

0:40:26 > 0:40:31ethical understanding of the morality of killing before you deploy.

0:40:38 > 0:40:40All right, who wants platoon commander?

0:40:40 > 0:40:42Who really wants it?

0:40:42 > 0:40:46- Who's putting their hand up because I want them to do? Mr Mansel Lewis.- Sir.

0:40:46 > 0:40:50Platoon commander. Mr MacNeish. Platoon sergeant.

0:40:50 > 0:40:53Mr Twyman, runner. Mr Sudworth, rad op.

0:40:53 > 0:40:57'They will all take over platoons, and they will deploy to Afghanistan.

0:40:57 > 0:41:02'At that stage, they can anticipate that they will take over one of the patrol bases,'

0:41:02 > 0:41:05be responsible for its intimate security,

0:41:05 > 0:41:09but equally for dominating the ground outside that patrol base.

0:41:09 > 0:41:13The intent is to destroy all the enemy within our boundaries.

0:41:13 > 0:41:17Scheme and manoeuvre. Three Section, you're already suppressing. I want you to stay there.

0:41:17 > 0:41:21Two Section, you're doing a left flanking manoeuvre, OK?

0:41:21 > 0:41:23- Mr Mansel Lewis, you perfectly happy?- Yeah.

0:41:23 > 0:41:27- Where we aiming towards? - The smoke in the centre of the...

0:41:27 > 0:41:30- No, the left-hand corner of that wood block.- Left-hand corner...

0:41:34 > 0:41:36GUNFIRE

0:41:36 > 0:41:40'When you go on exercise you have to show loads of aggression,

0:41:40 > 0:41:43'as if you're going to kill someone.

0:41:43 > 0:41:45'You think, God, I might actually...

0:41:45 > 0:41:47'I will actually have to do this one time.'

0:41:47 > 0:41:50'They're only short battles.'

0:41:50 > 0:41:53And not only that, we haven't got the ammunition

0:41:53 > 0:41:55to make it last as how long some battles do last.

0:41:55 > 0:41:59But currently, within, in the likes of the war in Afghanistan,

0:41:59 > 0:42:05battles are going on - I've heard of there being battles for 24-hours.

0:42:05 > 0:42:07Forward upon line across, left, yeah,

0:42:07 > 0:42:09till you hit the ravine that's running up,

0:42:09 > 0:42:10with the little trees in it.

0:42:10 > 0:42:13Follow that and there's an obvious person standing in it,

0:42:13 > 0:42:14and some smoke to the right.

0:42:20 > 0:42:23Keep going. Rapid fire!

0:42:29 > 0:42:32There's a bit of embarrassment, to be honest.

0:42:34 > 0:42:37This section is shocking. There's no fire support from the section down there.

0:42:39 > 0:42:41It's just not really good, really.

0:42:44 > 0:42:47- INTERVIEWER:- What can they do rectify it?

0:42:47 > 0:42:48Show a bit of aggression,

0:42:48 > 0:42:52a bit of determination, a bit of want to kill the enemy.

0:42:52 > 0:42:55Fucking get in there, get down, get low.

0:42:55 > 0:42:59The enemy is fucking 20 metres over in that direction,

0:42:59 > 0:43:01you fucking idle bastards. Get in there.

0:43:01 > 0:43:05Let's go, let's go. Go, go, go, go, go.

0:43:14 > 0:43:15Get in.

0:43:15 > 0:43:17Follow it up. Follow it up.

0:43:19 > 0:43:20Get in there.

0:43:20 > 0:43:22MAN SCREAMS

0:43:22 > 0:43:23Man down!

0:43:24 > 0:43:26Man down team two.

0:43:26 > 0:43:28One Section, who's got a stretcher?

0:43:28 > 0:43:31- I have.- I'll just fireman carry him.

0:43:31 > 0:43:33- Who is it? Who is it?- Sudworth.

0:43:33 > 0:43:34He's brown bread anyway.

0:43:34 > 0:43:39- The casualty's dead.- Come on, guys, let's get on it.

0:43:41 > 0:43:44Get on it quickly, stop fucking faffing.

0:43:46 > 0:43:47MAN SHOUTS

0:43:49 > 0:43:51Fucked. So hard.

0:43:51 > 0:43:55Stop referring to our fucking dead as dead. Yeah?

0:43:55 > 0:43:58There's no point in leaving a fucking KVI. He comes with us.

0:43:58 > 0:44:00We don't just fucking leave him,

0:44:00 > 0:44:03because if we leave somebody like that, all that's going to happen

0:44:03 > 0:44:07is the fucking Taliban or whoever it is get hold of that fucking dead,

0:44:07 > 0:44:11and then they start making videos of cutting him up and things like that,

0:44:11 > 0:44:15posted on fucking Youtube, and his family sees that

0:44:15 > 0:44:17and it's fucking publicity for them.

0:44:17 > 0:44:20Not only that, it's not a fucking good thing for us.

0:44:20 > 0:44:22It's about getting rid of people who

0:44:22 > 0:44:25can't sort of grin and bear the cold,

0:44:25 > 0:44:28who haven't got the capability to look left and right

0:44:28 > 0:44:32at the guys in their fox hole and draw strength from their character.

0:44:32 > 0:44:35Yeah, it's definitely survival.

0:44:35 > 0:44:39Mr Mansel Lewis, get your map out and show me where we are.

0:44:39 > 0:44:41I lost it.

0:44:41 > 0:44:42When was you going to tell me?

0:44:44 > 0:44:47You've lost a map in the area, this goes for everyone.

0:44:47 > 0:44:50He's now lost a map on the area that's got positions marked up.

0:44:50 > 0:44:53- Harbour area marked up on it? - Yes, sir.

0:44:53 > 0:44:55OK, so they now know where our harbour is.

0:44:55 > 0:44:58So now when we go back after doing advance to contact all fucking day,

0:44:58 > 0:45:02move into our harbour area, next minute we start taking incoming,

0:45:02 > 0:45:05and next minute we've got an assault coming on to our position,

0:45:05 > 0:45:08resulting in a full platoon getting killed

0:45:08 > 0:45:11because one individual decides to lose his map.

0:45:11 > 0:45:14You've got to fucking maintain your kit and equipment, all right?

0:45:14 > 0:45:16Reference to the top of the hill.

0:45:16 > 0:45:20Go find out and see if there is anyone else on the other side of it.

0:45:20 > 0:45:23Let's go. Hurry up, Mr Mansel Lewis.

0:45:24 > 0:45:27Get up there now. Let's go. Hurry up, get your weapon, go.

0:45:27 > 0:45:32Start doubling or I'm going to start making the platoon join you.

0:45:33 > 0:45:34Quicker.

0:45:36 > 0:45:39'There are lots of parts of me that find it difficult to digest

0:45:39 > 0:45:42'what we've been taught some of the time.'

0:45:42 > 0:45:44Keep going, Mr Mansel Lewis. Hurry up.

0:45:44 > 0:45:47'Colour Sergeant Vezza, he said in a situation

0:45:47 > 0:45:50'where you have to kill someone, it's either you or them,

0:45:50 > 0:45:53'and so for him in every situation,

0:45:53 > 0:45:57'he'd do anything to secure the lives of his men and also his life.'

0:45:57 > 0:46:02Let's go, Mr Mansel Lewis, back now. Hurry up. On me. Come on.

0:46:02 > 0:46:04'Whenever it means taking someone else's life,

0:46:04 > 0:46:07'then he's prepared to do that.'

0:46:17 > 0:46:20'I don't think anything can probably prepare you adequately

0:46:20 > 0:46:22'for the uncertainty of when you step out

0:46:22 > 0:46:25'of the patrol base on that first day. How it'll be,'

0:46:25 > 0:46:27how you'll respond when you come under fire.

0:46:27 > 0:46:30You can practise it as much as you want,

0:46:30 > 0:46:33but you don't know until you get that crack thump

0:46:33 > 0:46:36of rounds going past you or landing close to you,

0:46:36 > 0:46:40or indeed soldiers under your command being injured or killed.

0:46:42 > 0:46:46- Need to fall in, sir, please. - Yes, please, Mr Mansel Lewis.

0:46:51 > 0:46:55Right. So Colour Sergeant tells me you saw him earlier on,

0:46:55 > 0:46:58I presume this is about what we spoke about

0:46:58 > 0:47:01- in about week eight last term.- Sir. - OK. so speak to me then.

0:47:02 > 0:47:07There are parts of the job I'm... I don't think I could actually do.

0:47:07 > 0:47:10I don't have it in me to take another man's life, sir.

0:47:10 > 0:47:13One thing I would just say to you,

0:47:13 > 0:47:18there's very few people in the army who want to end a life.

0:47:18 > 0:47:21Don't think that everyone who joins the army

0:47:21 > 0:47:24has to be lusting after blood, because that's not the case at all.

0:47:24 > 0:47:28The reason why you do it, if you look to your right and you look to your left,

0:47:28 > 0:47:31those are the reasons why you do it, for the men that are with you.

0:47:31 > 0:47:34If that's got anything to do with it, I would like you to reconsider.

0:47:34 > 0:47:36What I'll do now though,

0:47:36 > 0:47:39I'll speak to the company commander, I'll make him fully aware.

0:47:39 > 0:47:42He'll probably speak to you either today or tomorrow, OK?

0:47:42 > 0:47:44- And we'll get the ball rolling from there.- Yes, sir.

0:47:44 > 0:47:49As long as you're 100% content that this is the right decision for you.

0:47:49 > 0:47:52OK. You got any questions for me?

0:47:52 > 0:47:55- No, that's it, thank you, sir. - OK. Fine.

0:47:55 > 0:47:58- Leave to go. - Yes, you may carry on.

0:47:58 > 0:48:00Thank you very much.

0:48:03 > 0:48:08I did think to myself, a number of times, you know,

0:48:08 > 0:48:11hypothetically if I were to lose my legs,

0:48:11 > 0:48:12if I were to lose my testicles

0:48:12 > 0:48:17and I was to watch all my best friends grow up and have families

0:48:17 > 0:48:21while I was sat in a chair, without any kids...

0:48:23 > 0:48:25..knowing that it happened in a war

0:48:25 > 0:48:28that was 3,500 miles away from home...

0:48:32 > 0:48:36..I'd struggle to work out actually if everything was worth it.

0:48:38 > 0:48:42And that's certainly something I've thought

0:48:42 > 0:48:45a lot about as well...really.

0:48:47 > 0:48:50He's clearly not a stupid guy. He's looked into it.

0:48:50 > 0:48:53- I've told him that I would speak to you.- It's fine.

0:48:53 > 0:48:56He's always had the opportunity to raise his hand up.

0:48:56 > 0:48:59The only thing I might offer him... I'll interview him.

0:48:59 > 0:49:01I'll offer him a chat with the Commandant,

0:49:01 > 0:49:04because the Commandant has said to me that he'll talk to him about it

0:49:04 > 0:49:07if he wishes to, if not, we'll start processing.

0:49:07 > 0:49:10Fine. OK. Brilliant. All right. Thanks.

0:49:10 > 0:49:13- Numbers are... - I know, they're dwindling.

0:49:13 > 0:49:14Numbers are dwindling.

0:49:16 > 0:49:18- Don't take it personally.- I don't.

0:49:23 > 0:49:24Fix bayonets!

0:49:26 > 0:49:28If at any point during this lesson

0:49:28 > 0:49:30I ask you what a bayonet is for,

0:49:30 > 0:49:34you are to shout at the top of your voice, "To kill, kill, kill."

0:49:35 > 0:49:38- What's the bayonet for? - ALL: KILL. KILL. KILL.

0:49:38 > 0:49:41I didn't realise I had the girls' platoon on the range today.

0:49:41 > 0:49:44- What's the bayonet for? - ALL: KILL. KILL. KILL.

0:49:44 > 0:49:48If at any point I ask you what makes the grass grow, you scream, "Blood, blood, blood.!

0:49:48 > 0:49:51- What makes the grass grow? - ALL: BLOOD, BLOOD, BLOOD.

0:49:51 > 0:49:54- I can't hear you. - ALL: BLOOD, BLOOD, BLOOD. - Still can't hear you.

0:49:54 > 0:49:59- Mr Mansel Lewis, come in. - Thank you, sir.

0:49:59 > 0:50:03Grab a seat. You look mildly apprehensive. Sit down.

0:50:04 > 0:50:07- ALL: KILL, KILL, KILL.- On guard!

0:50:07 > 0:50:08ALL: ON GUARD!

0:50:08 > 0:50:10Rubbish. High port!

0:50:10 > 0:50:11ALL: HIGH PORT!

0:50:11 > 0:50:13On guard!

0:50:13 > 0:50:15ALL: ON GUARD!

0:50:15 > 0:50:18I'm more concerned as to why you think, er...

0:50:18 > 0:50:22you can't reach a moral position on having, if necessary,

0:50:22 > 0:50:27as the last resort, to have to pull the trigger on someone.

0:50:27 > 0:50:29That's the key question I've got.

0:50:29 > 0:50:32It just... There's so many sensitivities that flag up

0:50:32 > 0:50:36- the moment I really commit myself to thinking about it hard.- Yeah.

0:50:36 > 0:50:39- And so...- What's your father's view on it?

0:50:39 > 0:50:40Well, he...

0:50:40 > 0:50:44He's very matter of fact. You know, he said that we do need an army,

0:50:44 > 0:50:47we do need to defend ourselves.

0:50:47 > 0:50:49And if that means taking someone's life,

0:50:49 > 0:50:52- then, of course, it's the last... - Last resort?

0:50:52 > 0:50:56Last resort. But if it needs to be done then...

0:50:56 > 0:50:58- Then...- We need good men to do it. - That's right, yeah.

0:50:58 > 0:51:03So, you're not, you're not taking issue with the fact that there is,

0:51:03 > 0:51:04as it were, as a last resort,

0:51:04 > 0:51:08a legitimate time when you may have to take someone's life.

0:51:08 > 0:51:11- You don't disagree with that? - No, I understand that.

0:51:11 > 0:51:12You're just really...

0:51:12 > 0:51:16So your case is really that you, personally, would rather not do that.

0:51:16 > 0:51:21You, personally, find it particularly distasteful to do that, is that it?

0:51:21 > 0:51:24I have reserva... I wouldn't want the responsibility of doing it.

0:51:24 > 0:51:26Yes, that's the case.

0:51:26 > 0:51:28Well, officers have to, you know,

0:51:28 > 0:51:31you have to do exactly what you're ordering your men to do.

0:51:31 > 0:51:33- Yeah.- So you don't come out of it well, really.

0:51:33 > 0:51:36And you're probably feeling a bit uncomfortable.

0:51:36 > 0:51:39ALL: KILL! KILL! KILL!

0:51:39 > 0:51:43KILL! KILL! KILL! KILL! KILL!

0:51:43 > 0:51:46KILL! KILL! KILL! KILL!

0:51:46 > 0:51:49My concern is, is there a trend there?

0:51:49 > 0:51:50I sense not.

0:51:50 > 0:51:53I sense you are a one-off, as it were.

0:51:53 > 0:51:56Not that... There will be others, but you're pretty unique.

0:51:56 > 0:51:59But I need to get a little bit of that reassurance,

0:51:59 > 0:52:00are things changing?

0:52:00 > 0:52:03Is there a concern over Afghanistan?

0:52:03 > 0:52:05You know, I need to get a feel for trends.

0:52:05 > 0:52:09Very important as a commandant, in case it's affecting other people.

0:52:09 > 0:52:12In this case, I think you are the only one because I've asked.

0:52:12 > 0:52:15There will always be some who have more questions

0:52:15 > 0:52:19when you're talking about morality of killing than others.

0:52:19 > 0:52:22And, and it's a very, very, very important issue.

0:52:22 > 0:52:25Probably THE most important issue.

0:52:25 > 0:52:27Because you can't commission through here

0:52:27 > 0:52:29unless you've got this one straight.

0:52:29 > 0:52:32So, what you're doing, leaving, basically,

0:52:32 > 0:52:36is the right thing if you can't get your conscience absolutely clear.

0:52:36 > 0:52:40- So, I have no problem with that. - Thank you, sir.

0:52:42 > 0:52:43MEN SCREAM

0:52:43 > 0:52:46KILL! KILL! KILL! KILL!

0:52:46 > 0:52:47ON GUARD!

0:52:47 > 0:52:48HIGH PORT!

0:52:50 > 0:52:52KILL! KILL! KILL!

0:52:52 > 0:52:53Front rung, ON GUARD!

0:52:54 > 0:52:55ON GUARD!

0:52:55 > 0:52:58Get in there and fucking stab him!

0:52:58 > 0:53:00Stab him! Stab him good!

0:53:00 > 0:53:02MAN ROARS

0:53:02 > 0:53:06ALL: KILL! KILL! KILL!

0:53:06 > 0:53:09Stab him! Stab him!

0:53:09 > 0:53:10ON GUARD!

0:53:10 > 0:53:12MAN SCREAMS

0:53:14 > 0:53:17MAN SCREAMS

0:53:20 > 0:53:23- ALL: KILL! KILL!- HIGH PORT!

0:53:23 > 0:53:26ALL: KILL! KILL! KILL! KILL!

0:53:26 > 0:53:28KILL! KILL! KILL!

0:53:28 > 0:53:31KILL! KILL! KILL!

0:53:32 > 0:53:34WHAT'S A BAYONET FOR?

0:53:34 > 0:53:36ALL: KILL! KILL!

0:53:36 > 0:53:38- WHAT'S IT FOR?- KILL! KILL!

0:53:38 > 0:53:40WHAT MAKES MY GRASS GROW?

0:53:40 > 0:53:42ALL: BLOOD! BLOOD!

0:53:42 > 0:53:44We drill right into them, to get them to understand

0:53:44 > 0:53:47what it might be like to have to kill someone.

0:53:47 > 0:53:51What it might feel like when you see that man go down.

0:53:51 > 0:53:54- ON GUARD!- ALL: ON GUARD!

0:53:54 > 0:53:57'Ultimately, when it all goes wrong,

0:53:57 > 0:54:00'you may have to put yourself in that frontline,'

0:54:00 > 0:54:03for your men. They've got to understand that.

0:54:03 > 0:54:06Take some deep breaths, calm yourselves down.

0:54:06 > 0:54:11I now certify you as steely-eyed dealers of death.

0:54:11 > 0:54:15There are a few who didn't have what it takes,

0:54:15 > 0:54:17OK, to do that, I don't think.

0:54:18 > 0:54:22There are people stood here, I do not think could do that for real.

0:54:22 > 0:54:25However, a majority of you, I believe,

0:54:25 > 0:54:28could pull that out of your fucking ass if the shit hits the fan

0:54:28 > 0:54:30and it is required of you.

0:54:30 > 0:54:32Not a bad effort.

0:54:34 > 0:54:39'I saw some pretty horrific sights in Iraq in 2003.

0:54:39 > 0:54:41'And some decisions were made there,

0:54:41 > 0:54:43'which came through me,

0:54:43 > 0:54:46'which I will live with for the rest of my life.'

0:54:46 > 0:54:48Right, everybody, get back in the wagon, now.

0:54:50 > 0:54:52'There was a... an Iraqi company,

0:54:52 > 0:54:55'position, that was absolutely flattened.

0:54:55 > 0:54:58'We put huge amounts of fire on it.

0:55:01 > 0:55:03'Thereafter, leaflets were sent out to all the others,

0:55:03 > 0:55:06'those that remained, all the way around it

0:55:06 > 0:55:10'and within 24-hours they started to surrender into squares.'

0:55:10 > 0:55:12It meant that we would save casualties,

0:55:12 > 0:55:15we were not going to have to kill more of the enemy

0:55:15 > 0:55:17then we absolutely had to.

0:55:17 > 0:55:21There are times when you have to be ruthless.

0:55:25 > 0:55:26'I was just short of the mark,

0:55:26 > 0:55:30'despite the fact that I've given the course'

0:55:30 > 0:55:35almost, almost five months, it's still very much that way.

0:55:37 > 0:55:39And I'm glad I discovered it in training.

0:55:39 > 0:55:41The worst thing would have been to discover it

0:55:41 > 0:55:45on the plane out to Afghanistan, or in the theatre.

0:55:45 > 0:55:47So, I'm grateful for that.

0:55:47 > 0:55:50And I wouldn't be surprised if there are people

0:55:50 > 0:55:53who discover it in the theatre themselves.

0:55:55 > 0:55:56He don't really want to go to Afghan.

0:55:56 > 0:55:59He doesn't want to kill someone.

0:55:59 > 0:56:01No-one wants to, but if you're joining the army,

0:56:01 > 0:56:03you're pretty much, in some way,

0:56:03 > 0:56:07you're going to either service another person to kill someone,

0:56:07 > 0:56:10or...you know, that's what the army does.

0:56:10 > 0:56:13It is a bit...for my way of thinking, I'm like, "Why did you join the army?"

0:56:13 > 0:56:17And he's saying about, you know, he don't want to lose

0:56:17 > 0:56:20his arms, legs, bollocks in Afghan.

0:56:20 > 0:56:23You know, he wants to have a family and all that stuff

0:56:23 > 0:56:25and that's important to...

0:56:25 > 0:56:29What's important to him at the minute, so, fair do's.

0:56:32 > 0:56:35I'd have thought you'd have thought about that

0:56:35 > 0:56:36before going through with it.

0:56:45 > 0:56:49I had doubts about whether we were in Afghanistan for the right reasons.

0:56:49 > 0:56:52I thought I could, sort of, suppress it.

0:56:57 > 0:57:01If we leave Afghanistan in 2015,

0:57:01 > 0:57:06then...you do have to ask yourself, what did those guys die for?

0:57:09 > 0:57:11'It's not our place to question it.

0:57:11 > 0:57:15'Whatever your private thoughts on the campaign, you toe the line

0:57:15 > 0:57:18'because it is bad for morale, bad for... You know,

0:57:18 > 0:57:22'if you're of the opinion that the campaign is a complete waste of time,

0:57:22 > 0:57:25'what good is that when you've got to explain

0:57:25 > 0:57:28'to an 18-year-old private that's just lost his mate,

0:57:28 > 0:57:31'and you think the war is for fuck all?'

0:57:31 > 0:57:34You don't say that, you say that it is for...

0:57:34 > 0:57:37You know, you're defending British interests

0:57:37 > 0:57:40and that you're doing it to serve

0:57:40 > 0:57:44and protect the British public from the threat of Islamic fundamentalism

0:57:44 > 0:57:48and al-Qaeda and you're preventing them using Afghanistan

0:57:48 > 0:57:52as a base from which to launch attacks onto the British mainland.

0:58:02 > 0:58:07You're willing to risk life and limb for your country

0:58:07 > 0:58:09but then the people that you're being selfish to

0:58:09 > 0:58:12are the ones that, actually,

0:58:12 > 0:58:15are the ones that you care most about.

0:58:16 > 0:58:19I don't know about the Parachute Regiment.

0:58:19 > 0:58:21I know your heart's set on the Paras

0:58:21 > 0:58:24and it will come down to you, it's only down to you.

0:58:24 > 0:58:27- Leave to carry on, sir, please. - Yeah, please do.

0:58:46 > 0:58:48Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:58:48 > 0:58:51E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk