0:00:02 > 0:00:04Tell me what stammering is for you.
0:00:04 > 0:00:07I...noticed...
0:00:08 > 0:00:10I...
0:00:26 > 0:00:30It's...when...you...
0:00:33 > 0:00:38want to say something...
0:00:38 > 0:00:41and it gets...
0:00:41 > 0:00:47..and it gets stuck...in.
0:00:54 > 0:00:58It's all there in your head, you're just like anybody else,
0:00:58 > 0:01:01and then you open your mouth and suddenly...nothing comes out.
0:01:03 > 0:01:05'And imagine that.'
0:01:06 > 0:01:12You can't project anything of what you're like as a person.
0:01:12 > 0:01:17I think that's the hardest, the feeling inside
0:01:17 > 0:01:21that that child of yours must feel
0:01:21 > 0:01:24lonely because of that stammer.
0:01:24 > 0:01:30Getting close to your own child is very difficult and that has a big impact.
0:01:31 > 0:01:34Speech expresses, you know, what you're thinking.
0:01:34 > 0:01:37Your communication with your fellow man is such a basic thing.
0:01:39 > 0:01:42You're in your own little world.
0:01:42 > 0:01:43Cut off.
0:01:43 > 0:01:49In 1993, Michael Palin gave his name to a pioneering centre
0:01:49 > 0:01:54set up to help families with children who stammer.
0:01:54 > 0:01:58My father had a very severe stammer, so that's why I got involved.
0:01:58 > 0:01:59It is personal for him.
0:01:59 > 0:02:04It's not just a charitable cause that he's interested in,
0:02:04 > 0:02:06I think he really cares about it.
0:02:06 > 0:02:11It was actually trying to sort my feelings out about him and what he was going through.
0:02:13 > 0:02:14Right, let's cross over.
0:02:14 > 0:02:19Over 100,000 families in Britain live with a child who stammers.
0:02:19 > 0:02:24In a matter of days, three of them will enrol on an emotional and intensive course
0:02:24 > 0:02:26designed to improve the children's speech
0:02:26 > 0:02:29and their parents' understanding of stammering.
0:02:31 > 0:02:33Wait there, Reg.
0:02:40 > 0:02:44Ten-year-old Reggie is the eldest of six children,
0:02:44 > 0:02:46but is the only one with a stammer.
0:02:46 > 0:02:51It developed almost overnight when he was just two and a half.
0:02:54 > 0:02:56Look, Mum.
0:02:58 > 0:03:00Two pages on that one.
0:03:00 > 0:03:02OK.
0:03:03 > 0:03:05I don't talk
0:03:05 > 0:03:08like other
0:03:08 > 0:03:12ch-ch-ch-children.
0:03:15 > 0:03:18Many people don't like
0:03:18 > 0:03:20the way I talk.
0:03:24 > 0:03:27How do you feel about it?
0:03:27 > 0:03:29Bad.
0:03:29 > 0:03:31- Oh.- Very bad.
0:03:34 > 0:03:37'I worry. I worry a lot.'
0:03:37 > 0:03:42As a mum, you just want to do the best for him
0:03:42 > 0:03:47and you want him to have a happy life, and have a full life
0:03:47 > 0:03:49and do what he really wants to do.
0:03:49 > 0:03:54And that's what we worry about, really. We don't want him to
0:03:54 > 0:03:56not achieve his potential.
0:03:56 > 0:04:00I need to talk
0:04:00 > 0:04:05without...stammering.
0:04:06 > 0:04:08- Is that hard?- Yeah.
0:04:08 > 0:04:10A bit hard, yeah.
0:04:13 > 0:04:17Well, the other kids are all vying for my attention all the time.
0:04:17 > 0:04:22They'll come home from school, "Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum! " and you don't know where to look
0:04:22 > 0:04:26and it's noisy, and he'll just withdraw from that.
0:04:26 > 0:04:29Sometimes he'll come in and try and ask a question
0:04:29 > 0:04:34and won't be able to get it out, and he'll really struggle over,
0:04:34 > 0:04:37you know, articulating what he wants to say.
0:04:37 > 0:04:39And then he'll just give up.
0:04:39 > 0:04:40He'll just say, "It doesn't matter."
0:04:40 > 0:04:45- Can you imagine what it would feel like not to stammer?- Yeah.
0:04:45 > 0:04:52And I would really, really like that.
0:04:52 > 0:04:54Why's that?
0:04:54 > 0:05:02Because I'm a bit too embarrassed.
0:05:04 > 0:05:08People have actually walked away from him while he's talking
0:05:08 > 0:05:10and it breaks your heart, really.
0:05:12 > 0:05:16Because he must...I always get upset.
0:05:17 > 0:05:19But, you know,
0:05:19 > 0:05:21things don't bother him.
0:05:21 > 0:05:26If you ask him how he is, he always says, "Oh, I'm fine, I'm good."
0:05:26 > 0:05:28He never kind of
0:05:28 > 0:05:33let's on that he's bothered by anything, you know, he just gets on with things.
0:05:33 > 0:05:36And it must really hurt him to
0:05:36 > 0:05:42not have someone give him that attention and to listen to what he wants to say.
0:05:49 > 0:05:50Got you.
0:05:57 > 0:05:59So who do you support?
0:05:59 > 0:06:00Chelsea, obviously.
0:06:01 > 0:06:07Eleven-year-old William lives with his parents and two brothers.
0:06:07 > 0:06:12He's just started secondary school and is becoming increasingly concerned about his stammer.
0:06:12 > 0:06:17These are signed pictures from Frank Lampard.
0:06:17 > 0:06:20These are all my trophies from football.
0:06:20 > 0:06:27And I got voted by all of the team players to be Player of the Year.
0:06:27 > 0:06:32And this especially is a quite good achievement,
0:06:32 > 0:06:37I got it from the David Beckham Academy.
0:06:37 > 0:06:44I did GCSE Foundation in Maths in Year six last year.
0:06:44 > 0:06:46- No way!- Yeah.
0:06:46 > 0:06:48Wow, so you're really clever.
0:06:48 > 0:06:50Thanks.
0:06:51 > 0:06:55William likes everything just so.
0:06:55 > 0:06:57Very sensible.
0:06:57 > 0:07:00Very conscientious at school.
0:07:00 > 0:07:05He can do so many things, but yet he's got a stammer.
0:07:05 > 0:07:11He's a perfectionist and it's a major downfall for him and his personality.
0:07:13 > 0:07:17It can occur sometimes if your brain is thinking...
0:07:20 > 0:07:26No, no, no it's if your brain is thinking
0:07:26 > 0:07:30of a more higher level than your mouth is.
0:07:31 > 0:07:34I think really it's the future.
0:07:34 > 0:07:37It's after school. It's the job interviews.
0:07:37 > 0:07:42It's maybe being brushed aside cos there could be half a dozen candidates,
0:07:42 > 0:07:45William could be the best one,
0:07:45 > 0:07:49but because of the speech thing, you know, he could be put to the bottom of the pack.
0:07:49 > 0:07:52And for, and for
0:07:52 > 0:07:59the future I just want it to like completely not exist in my body.
0:08:15 > 0:08:18- So where we off to?- The beach
0:08:18 > 0:08:24down...at the end of our drive.
0:08:29 > 0:08:33Girls are far more likely to grow out of a stammer than boys,
0:08:33 > 0:08:36but 14-year-old Bethan's speech
0:08:36 > 0:08:41has got gradually worse since she began stammering at the age of five.
0:08:41 > 0:08:48- What does it feel like when you try to speak?- Must get that word out.
0:08:48 > 0:08:54Must get that word out. Must get that word out. Yeah.
0:09:02 > 0:09:03Yes, darling?
0:09:03 > 0:09:07BENTHAN STAMMERS
0:09:16 > 0:09:18An ice cream?
0:09:18 > 0:09:20Which one would you like, sweetheart?
0:09:23 > 0:09:27Would you like to point it out to me? Would that be easier for you?
0:09:27 > 0:09:29Right, which one do you want then?
0:09:29 > 0:09:31Show me which one you want.
0:09:34 > 0:09:38You would like an Aero Snowball, yes?
0:09:38 > 0:09:41- Please.- Say that for me.
0:09:45 > 0:09:47Aero Snowball.
0:09:47 > 0:09:49- Well, done.- Snowball.
0:09:49 > 0:09:51Thank you.
0:09:54 > 0:10:00She used to have a very advanced vocabulary
0:09:59 > 0:10:04and she used to quote poems to you.
0:10:04 > 0:10:08When she was two she said the Owl and the Pussycat all the way through.
0:10:08 > 0:10:14And she just remembered so many things from her books, and used to keep going on and on about them.
0:10:14 > 0:10:20Now I can't say...what I...want
0:10:22 > 0:10:31to say and some children take the Mickey.
0:10:32 > 0:10:35- Children take the Mickey out of you? - Yeah.
0:10:35 > 0:10:39I worry about her not having any friends.
0:10:39 > 0:10:43I worry about her not interacting.
0:10:43 > 0:10:49'I worry that she won't find a husband.'
0:10:49 > 0:10:56'All the nice things that I've had in life, she might not be able to have the same.'
0:10:56 > 0:10:58Yeah.
0:11:04 > 0:11:10There is no magic cure for a stammer, but there are ways of controlling it.
0:11:10 > 0:11:14At the UK's largest centre for stammering children,
0:11:14 > 0:11:19they are dedicated to developing these techniques.
0:11:19 > 0:11:23I've never been able to talk about my father's stammer with him,
0:11:23 > 0:11:26it was just something that was like a curse
0:11:26 > 0:11:30that we couldn't really talk about, and if you talked about it, it was just rubbing salt in the wounds.
0:11:30 > 0:11:36And here people are actually going to try and help children like my dad.
0:11:39 > 0:11:48We run these courses. They run for two weeks and we have six children and their parents come,
0:11:48 > 0:11:52and they come from all over the country.
0:11:52 > 0:11:59William's stammering, he needs to go to the Michael Palin Centre.
0:11:59 > 0:12:04- And how are you feeling about going on this course?- Excited.
0:12:06 > 0:12:10Reggie, William, Bethan and their parents are all travelling to London.
0:12:12 > 0:12:15After years of frustration, this course is often seen as
0:12:15 > 0:12:20the last chance for families to help their child's speech improve.
0:12:20 > 0:12:23I think a lot of them are at their wits' end.
0:12:23 > 0:12:26You know, stammering is something a lot of young children grow out of,
0:12:26 > 0:12:30and for many years the parents will have their fingers crossed thinking,
0:12:30 > 0:12:36you know, four out of five children grow out of this, hopefully my child will be in that statistic.
0:12:36 > 0:12:39But by the time they get to the sort of late primary school years,
0:12:39 > 0:12:45the likelihood has diminished a lot, in terms of it just naturally going away.
0:12:48 > 0:12:49Where's it all gonna end?
0:12:49 > 0:12:51It's a severe stammer
0:12:51 > 0:12:55and he's got secondary school which is a big jump, you know.
0:12:55 > 0:12:57Is it going to be like throwing him to the lions?
0:12:57 > 0:13:02Till you've lived closely with that, you can never appreciate how
0:13:02 > 0:13:05it dictates someone's life and the people around them.
0:13:05 > 0:13:10And we have a lot of hopes on this course, because we just don't know where to go after that.
0:13:10 > 0:13:12Mmm.
0:13:12 > 0:13:15We really appreciate the fact that you're all here in such good time.
0:13:15 > 0:13:18What we're going to do is leave the children in here now
0:13:18 > 0:13:21and we're going to take the parents through to the other side.
0:13:23 > 0:13:26It isn't just the kids who are starting therapy,
0:13:26 > 0:13:28the parents are too.
0:13:28 > 0:13:35In separate rooms both the parents and children begin to open up about their fears and frustrations.
0:13:35 > 0:13:40It's not just about fluency, the course is designed to get to the
0:13:40 > 0:13:43heart of the difficult emotions that accompany the condition.
0:13:43 > 0:13:47It's time for everyone to face the stammer head on.
0:13:47 > 0:13:49Welcome everybody to our group.
0:13:49 > 0:13:54We're going to have loads of fun. You all do have a stammer, that's why you're here.
0:13:54 > 0:14:01And this is a place where it's OK to stammer, where it actually really doesn't matter at all.
0:14:01 > 0:14:04What we're going to do now is have a little bit of discussion time
0:14:04 > 0:14:11about why we involve parents, about why you think you're here.
0:14:11 > 0:14:15There's always a certain amount of anxiety when you start on a course like that.
0:14:15 > 0:14:19And particularly those group environments when everybody's got to get involved.
0:14:19 > 0:14:24And I remember my head dropped and I was thinking, "Oh, you've got to talk to the person next to you
0:14:24 > 0:14:26- "and find out three things." And I'm thinking...- Oh, yeah.
0:14:26 > 0:14:28"Oh, God!" You know.
0:14:28 > 0:14:33And I'm thinking, "Oh, no, here we go, have we got two weeks of this?"
0:14:33 > 0:14:37I think we really need to go back to basics, and I don't think you could
0:14:37 > 0:14:42envisage what is involved in that unless both parents are here.
0:14:42 > 0:14:47So did you think, Paul, when they said to you initially, you're both coming?
0:14:47 > 0:14:52Well, happy, because I thought, "Brilliant, William needs this opportunity."
0:14:52 > 0:14:55- You're shaking your head.- Because you went, "What do I have to come for?"
0:14:55 > 0:14:57Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
0:14:57 > 0:14:59- Let me finish. Let me finish. - "Does it really need both of us?"
0:14:59 > 0:15:03Yeah, 100% and I said, you know, my initial thought was brilliant for Wills and I just thought,
0:15:03 > 0:15:05"Well, what am I going to be doing?"
0:15:05 > 0:15:08I presumed we were gonna be standing at the back, watching 'em.
0:15:08 > 0:15:12You know, and I'm thinking, "Oh, my God, how boring's this going to be?"
0:15:12 > 0:15:16I'm not sure whether this is true or not, but I think it makes you examine
0:15:16 > 0:15:21the interaction between each other and how that affects the environment your child is in.
0:15:21 > 0:15:27You're not here because you've done something or are doing something that is unhelpful.
0:15:27 > 0:15:30It's not about your styles of parenting and things like that.
0:15:30 > 0:15:32The parent can't cause stammering.
0:15:32 > 0:15:36Course you worry that it's your fault.
0:15:36 > 0:15:39There's a certain amount of guilt about,
0:15:39 > 0:15:41we didn't do enough at the beginning
0:15:41 > 0:15:48and if we had nipped it in the bud, maybe he wouldn't be as bad now.
0:15:48 > 0:15:52When he was quite young I used to think maybe we've made this happen.
0:15:52 > 0:15:54We thought, oh, we shouldn't have
0:15:54 > 0:15:58surrounded her with cotton wool and looked after her so much.
0:15:58 > 0:16:03We should have allowed her to practise more with children of her age
0:16:03 > 0:16:07and then perhaps it wouldn't have been as hard.
0:16:07 > 0:16:10If you think back there were some other things said to us which
0:16:10 > 0:16:14we now know are daft, but things like, he didn't eat the right food.
0:16:14 > 0:16:17I remember I asked my mother about it.
0:16:18 > 0:16:24And she just said, she came out with this wonderful line which I've never forgotten.
0:16:24 > 0:16:30She said, "Oh, yes, a maid jumped out on him when he was very young."
0:16:30 > 0:16:32I mean, you know, whatever that meant,
0:16:32 > 0:16:36whatever dark euphemisms were there, I just don't know.
0:16:36 > 0:16:42But that was all I was ever told in terms of the cause of his stammer.
0:16:42 > 0:16:46There are myths out there that don't get dispelled.
0:16:46 > 0:16:51And unfortunately something like The King's Speech, you know, the myth that was perpetuated by that film
0:16:51 > 0:16:58was something about King George VI's stammer being linked to his experiences as a child.
0:16:58 > 0:17:03And that's not factual, that's not what we know from the research that's happening.
0:17:03 > 0:17:08We know it's something to do with the brain function and the wiring in the brain,
0:17:08 > 0:17:13it's not about your parent styles or parenting and things like that.
0:17:13 > 0:17:18New research shows that some children are born with a genetic vulnerability to stammer.
0:17:18 > 0:17:20This can also be exacerbated
0:17:20 > 0:17:25by the child's emotional state and their environment.
0:17:25 > 0:17:27This is why the whole family is involved.
0:17:27 > 0:17:33Parents may not be the direct cause, but they can be part of the solution.
0:17:37 > 0:17:42Do any of you get a bit nervous if you think you're going to stammer? Does that ever happen?
0:17:43 > 0:17:49Very tense...It gets quite tense.
0:17:49 > 0:17:52I'm a bit like stressed and frustrated.
0:17:54 > 0:17:59It makes me feel a bit ang...
0:18:03 > 0:18:05..angry.
0:18:17 > 0:18:23By lunchtime it's already clear that some children are finding it harder to join in than others.
0:18:25 > 0:18:28Have you had a good morning, Reg?
0:18:30 > 0:18:33Doesn't want to mix with anybody.
0:18:33 > 0:18:36He won't join in.
0:18:36 > 0:18:40Yeah. He's just on the outside all the time. Look at him.
0:18:44 > 0:18:49Stammering is very overtly something that's happening with the mouth,
0:18:49 > 0:18:53but it has a knock-on effect
0:18:53 > 0:18:58on their total communication, but also on their participation in life, very often.
0:18:59 > 0:19:01- All right?- Yep.
0:19:01 > 0:19:03Good boy. Proud of you.
0:19:07 > 0:19:12And that's a large part, I think, of the problem of stammering.
0:19:12 > 0:19:14You get inhibited. You lose confidence.
0:19:14 > 0:19:16It's the feeling you're on your own, lonely.
0:19:16 > 0:19:19And, of course, it's not a problem just for children,
0:19:19 > 0:19:21it's a problem for all the family.
0:19:21 > 0:19:23Everyone has to relate to it in some way.
0:19:23 > 0:19:26You know, and I think about my father, poor guy, had a stammer,
0:19:26 > 0:19:30but my mother, you know, all her life married to this man
0:19:30 > 0:19:32who couldn't always say what he wanted to say,
0:19:32 > 0:19:36going at a different pace from everybody else.
0:19:40 > 0:19:45I don't remember having sat down with him and had a good old chat about whatever.
0:19:45 > 0:19:48I just don't remember it.
0:19:48 > 0:19:53His childhood will be over and we'll never really engage him as much as we wanted him to.
0:19:53 > 0:19:56I'd have wanted him to just join in and get to know him, and
0:19:56 > 0:19:59I know it sounds ridiculous, like a father to a son.
0:20:01 > 0:20:05For some of these children they will be going a bit
0:20:05 > 0:20:10quieter on their parents naturally, but throw the stammer into the mix.
0:20:10 > 0:20:12I mean, a lot of us don't know what's going on in our kids' heads,
0:20:12 > 0:20:15but for these parents there's an extra layer to that.
0:20:17 > 0:20:22He'll always take himself off. He likes to be on his own.
0:20:22 > 0:20:26If he's not on the computer, he'll be up in his room reading a book.
0:20:26 > 0:20:29He really likes to kind of
0:20:29 > 0:20:31keep away.
0:20:31 > 0:20:33Sometimes it's difficult to get him out of that world.
0:20:35 > 0:20:38I've got...
0:20:41 > 0:20:43three or...
0:20:45 > 0:20:49..many here. This is...
0:20:50 > 0:20:55..a Spinosaurus.
0:20:56 > 0:21:03This is an Edmontosaurus.
0:21:05 > 0:21:11This...is...a T-rex.
0:21:13 > 0:21:18So tell me, Reggie, how do you know so much about dinosaurs?
0:21:18 > 0:21:20Because...
0:21:21 > 0:21:24of all of...
0:21:24 > 0:21:28them books over there.
0:21:29 > 0:21:31Do you like reading?
0:21:31 > 0:21:34Yeah, I love reading.
0:21:34 > 0:21:38He's got such a lot to say, he really has.
0:21:38 > 0:21:43He's so intelligent. And when you do have a conversation with him, he blows you away.
0:21:43 > 0:21:48You know, but it takes so long for him to do it, because he doesn't have
0:21:48 > 0:21:52the tools to be able to tell people, and that's what's really frustrating.
0:22:00 > 0:22:03It's an important day in the children's group,
0:22:03 > 0:22:10as the therapists introduce one of their key weapons, code name Tarzan.
0:22:10 > 0:22:14Tarzan was
0:22:14 > 0:22:16running
0:22:18 > 0:22:22towards the jungle.
0:22:22 > 0:22:30So what everybody should have on their screen is Kevin, who's one of the therapists in the team,
0:22:30 > 0:22:35and he's reading the passage in a certain way.
0:22:35 > 0:22:41OK? It's called smooth, slow speech.
0:22:42 > 0:22:46Mastering slow speech is the first lesson in fluency.
0:22:46 > 0:22:52If they can learn to flow one word into the next, they'll have less chance of stammering.
0:22:52 > 0:22:56For many kids, this task can immediately improve their speech.
0:22:56 > 0:23:00They're really slowing down their own rate,
0:23:00 > 0:23:06feeling and experiencing what happens when they do that.
0:23:06 > 0:23:11And typically what happens is that they are fluent.
0:23:12 > 0:23:20Tarzan knew that...he knew no fear.
0:23:21 > 0:23:27When something rose up.
0:23:27 > 0:23:29Where do you normally stammer on a word?
0:23:29 > 0:23:32- The start.- Mmm hmmm.
0:23:32 > 0:23:37So if you say two words together, how many chances have you got to stammer?
0:23:37 > 0:23:40- Less chance.- Yeah.
0:23:40 > 0:23:42Tarzan...
0:23:42 > 0:23:45What's it like seeing her speak fluently?
0:23:45 > 0:23:46It's lovely, really lovely.
0:23:48 > 0:23:54It's a normal 14-year-old,
0:23:54 > 0:23:59but you can't get too excited cos you know it's not going to last for long.
0:23:59 > 0:24:05The children have the techniques, they can be extremely fluent,
0:24:05 > 0:24:12and then they stop using them and they're stammering as much as before.
0:24:12 > 0:24:15It's still, to them, not their normal way of speaking.
0:24:15 > 0:24:19And most of us just want to stop doing something that doesn't feel normal
0:24:19 > 0:24:21and just become ourselves again.
0:24:21 > 0:24:27And even though it's the trade-off between stammering and fluency, most children would
0:24:27 > 0:24:31rather just oh, stop that now, just talk normally, which is stammering.
0:24:31 > 0:24:33It's like when I was a child and, you know, you were supposed to say
0:24:33 > 0:24:36water with a T and you know it's the right way to say it,
0:24:36 > 0:24:39but you don't always say it like that, do you?
0:24:39 > 0:24:43So I suppose that's what he's like with his speaking.
0:24:43 > 0:24:45- Wa'er.- And Mallorca.
0:24:47 > 0:24:53But I suppose that's where our frustrations come, because we have seen the fluent Bethan
0:24:53 > 0:24:56and then you get a glimpse of it and then it disappears.
0:24:56 > 0:24:58Was that two sentences or three?
0:24:58 > 0:25:02- Three.- Three, OK. Shall we do another three?- OK, yes.
0:25:02 > 0:25:06I have gone through phases of going, "Bethan, you know how to do this,
0:25:06 > 0:25:08"they've taught you, why can't you do it?"
0:25:08 > 0:25:12Technique alone won't beat the stammer.
0:25:12 > 0:25:17For Bethan to take a step forward, Alison will have to take a step back.
0:25:17 > 0:25:22Bethan is 14 now and she's not going to be still reminding her to do something about her speech
0:25:22 > 0:25:27when she's 24, so there should be some sense of moving towards Bethan taking responsibility.
0:25:41 > 0:25:45Despite outwardly stammering less than the other kids,
0:25:45 > 0:25:50William is particularly troubled by his imperfect speech.
0:25:50 > 0:25:55- Oh, what a goal!- One mum did say to me, your son seems fine.- Yeah.
0:25:55 > 0:25:59And then I sort of said to him how much he worries about his stammer
0:25:59 > 0:26:04and different things that he'd said to me about, "I hate it so much.
0:26:04 > 0:26:07"I'm so stupid I can't even say my name."
0:26:07 > 0:26:11And it just makes you realise how it affects his life so much.
0:26:11 > 0:26:19Most dogs have one name but Pooch had three.
0:26:19 > 0:26:24He gets very upset with himself, you know, cos he knows that it's him to blame.
0:26:24 > 0:26:27- Well, he thinks it's him to blame. - Can I give you a tick?- I think so.
0:26:27 > 0:26:29Yeah, he's not happy if he gets nine out of ten, you know,
0:26:29 > 0:26:35in a classroom, so not to be able to get ten out of ten from his
0:26:35 > 0:26:38own speech, for William
0:26:38 > 0:26:42- is not good enough. - Can I give you a tick? Yeah.
0:26:42 > 0:26:46I have to always do it perfectly.
0:26:48 > 0:26:51Do you notice the things that you weren't pleased with more?
0:26:51 > 0:26:58Yeah, I do cos I thought on the reading I did rubbish.
0:26:58 > 0:27:01And then are you more likely to stammer or less likely to stammer?
0:27:01 > 0:27:04- When I get tense?- yeah.
0:27:04 > 0:27:06- Yeah, more. - You're more likely to stammer.
0:27:06 > 0:27:10- Yeah.- So there's a bit of a vicious circle going on there, isn't there? - Yeah.
0:27:10 > 0:27:19It's a problem in that the more he wants to be fluent, the more he puts
0:27:19 > 0:27:24pressure on himself to be fluent, the more likely he is to stammer.
0:27:24 > 0:27:28So with your speech, instead of aiming for perfect, what shall we aim for?
0:27:28 > 0:27:32I'd say almost or nearly.
0:27:32 > 0:27:34Almost is good enough?
0:27:34 > 0:27:36So that means that there's a bit of room...
0:27:36 > 0:27:38- For improvement.- Uh-huh.
0:27:38 > 0:27:43And a little bit of room for a little few stammers and could be OK?
0:27:43 > 0:27:44Yeah.
0:27:44 > 0:27:49When that sunk in, for me, that was a bit of a moment.
0:27:49 > 0:27:53You think, wow, I know where William is, I know where he's coming from.
0:27:53 > 0:27:57I can sort of see how it's affected him more now.
0:27:57 > 0:28:01If parents are describing their child as perfectionist,
0:28:01 > 0:28:05what we know about personality is it's partly to do with what you
0:28:05 > 0:28:08inherit and partly to do with the environment you're in.
0:28:08 > 0:28:10So if a parent's saying that the child's a perfectionist,
0:28:10 > 0:28:13there's a strong chance that one of the parents'll be a perfectionist.
0:28:13 > 0:28:16Where do you think he gets his perfectionism from?
0:28:16 > 0:28:19His mum...
0:28:19 > 0:28:22110%.
0:28:24 > 0:28:27- Maybe.- There's no question.
0:28:27 > 0:28:29And I think it's interesting that Paul said it was Ann,
0:28:29 > 0:28:33because I think if you look at Paul you can see there are similar tendencies there too.
0:28:33 > 0:28:34We call you Perfect Paul.
0:28:34 > 0:28:41- I was born that way and strive for perfection.- I guess, no, we're both a bit like it.
0:28:49 > 0:28:54At the end of the first week, the parents are set their toughest task to date,
0:28:54 > 0:28:58which is designed to help them empathise with their child.
0:28:58 > 0:29:00They must mimic their stammer.
0:29:00 > 0:29:02What we would like you to do
0:29:02 > 0:29:08is to actually have a go at doing that stammering. OK?
0:29:08 > 0:29:12So thinking about your own child, what happens to the sounds he's trying to say,
0:29:12 > 0:29:16stammering in the way your child does. OK?
0:29:16 > 0:29:20In the group where they stammer to each other is a real key one.
0:29:20 > 0:29:26It's very uncomfortable and it's very revealing.
0:29:32 > 0:29:34C...
0:29:36 > 0:29:38C...C...
0:29:40 > 0:29:42Can I...Can I have a cake?
0:29:48 > 0:29:50Bethan is my name.
0:29:52 > 0:29:54I live in Conway.
0:29:57 > 0:30:02This is about sort of something to do with experiencing, getting into your child's shoes and
0:30:02 > 0:30:06feeling what it feels like to be putting that effort into speaking.
0:30:06 > 0:30:08Mum. Mum.
0:30:10 > 0:30:11Mum.
0:30:13 > 0:30:15Mum.
0:30:15 > 0:30:17Mum.
0:30:19 > 0:30:21Right, so how was that?
0:30:21 > 0:30:23Let me hear from you.
0:30:23 > 0:30:26Hard. Embarrassing.
0:30:28 > 0:30:33- OK.- In my mind it's sort of taking the Mick out of him, really.
0:30:33 > 0:30:35And, for me, that's very difficult.
0:30:35 > 0:30:38OK. OK.
0:30:38 > 0:30:40- That was quite hard, that.- Yeah. - They're having to really put
0:30:40 > 0:30:44themselves out in the front line every day, you know,
0:30:44 > 0:30:46and we're feeling emotional doing it for ten minutes.
0:30:46 > 0:30:49They've been doing it for years, you know.
0:30:49 > 0:30:52That's the most powerful thing so far in this course for me.
0:30:52 > 0:30:56I put myself in his situation and I remember how difficult it is
0:30:56 > 0:31:00when he stutters, you know, out in the real world.
0:31:02 > 0:31:03OK.
0:31:06 > 0:31:09For me, that two minutes brought the whole lot of it
0:31:09 > 0:31:11come in one go like that.
0:31:11 > 0:31:13It's very difficult to stay focused.
0:31:13 > 0:31:15You know what I mean? It's very upsetting,
0:31:15 > 0:31:18but the poor little bastard's put up with this for five years.
0:31:18 > 0:31:19D'you know what I mean?
0:31:19 > 0:31:21- Mmm. Oh.- It's difficult.
0:31:23 > 0:31:26It upsets me now, really, thinking about it,
0:31:26 > 0:31:30cos it was all years and years of
0:31:30 > 0:31:34seeing, you know, your little boy struggle,
0:31:34 > 0:31:37that's when it all started coming home and started making sense.
0:31:37 > 0:31:42And all the times I've given him a hard time or got frustrated,
0:31:42 > 0:31:46and it all kind of like came to me all at that moment, really.
0:31:47 > 0:31:52With him I think I'm a lot more, you know, softer.
0:31:52 > 0:31:55Yeah, I reckon that's the word.
0:31:55 > 0:31:58Something I don't find that easy anyway.
0:32:00 > 0:32:04Did you feel in a way any closer to him after that?
0:32:04 > 0:32:06Yeah.
0:32:06 > 0:32:08Definitely. Definitely.
0:32:14 > 0:32:16We share something.
0:32:16 > 0:32:20They're there because of their children, I'm there because of my dad.
0:32:22 > 0:32:27And I will often wonder, if he were still alive, whether I would
0:32:27 > 0:32:32now be able to say to him, you know, I've learnt a bit about stammering, tell me what it was all about.
0:32:32 > 0:32:34So in a way I feel closer to him.
0:32:36 > 0:32:39But I just feel sad that he
0:32:39 > 0:32:46missed out, because I think that he would have been a happier man.
0:32:53 > 0:32:58It's halfway through the course and each of the families is noticing signs of progress.
0:32:59 > 0:33:01Oh, yeah.
0:33:01 > 0:33:07SMOOTHLY: Tarzan was running...
0:33:07 > 0:33:12towards the jungle.
0:33:12 > 0:33:16The homework is very helpful.
0:33:16 > 0:33:20My trousers are too tight.
0:33:21 > 0:33:26It was an agreeable meal.
0:33:27 > 0:33:30Pay the gas bill.
0:33:31 > 0:33:36The Titanic exhibition really moved me.
0:33:36 > 0:33:40And how do you think your stammer's been?
0:33:40 > 0:33:43It has been a lot better.
0:33:44 > 0:33:47Yeah, it certainly sounds great today. Well done.
0:33:47 > 0:33:49- Good.- Thank you, Mum.
0:33:51 > 0:33:54Bethan has been working hard on her homework exercises.
0:33:54 > 0:33:58- Have you had a nice day? - I have, yes.
0:33:58 > 0:34:01There's a little bench over there.
0:34:01 > 0:34:05With Alison leaving Bethan to take responsibility for her own speech,
0:34:05 > 0:34:09they've both seen a big improvement.
0:34:09 > 0:34:12- Do you think you're showing any progress?- Yep.
0:34:12 > 0:34:14Like what?
0:34:14 > 0:34:19I've learnt to handle the word gorilla.
0:34:19 > 0:34:24- Cos you were worried about saying gorilla last night, weren't you?- Yes.
0:34:24 > 0:34:26Oh, that's a good thing. And how did you do that?
0:34:26 > 0:34:29Doing the soft start.
0:34:29 > 0:34:31Ah, very good.
0:34:31 > 0:34:37I have to keep remembering that it's her stammer, it's not mine
0:34:37 > 0:34:39and she is old enough to do something about it.
0:34:39 > 0:34:45It's her choice and it's her life, so I have to try and accept that.
0:34:45 > 0:34:46Gorilla.
0:34:46 > 0:34:50There we are, once you put a soft start in it.
0:34:50 > 0:34:52- Gorilla. - Yeah, that's better, wasn't it?
0:34:52 > 0:34:53- Yeah, it was.- Yeah.
0:34:53 > 0:34:56- So you're glad you're here? - Yes, I am.
0:34:56 > 0:34:57There we go. Good.
0:34:57 > 0:35:01'I understand it more and I understand Bethan more.'
0:35:01 > 0:35:04I just accept her for who she is, really.
0:35:04 > 0:35:05Yeah.
0:35:06 > 0:35:08She's grown up a lot.
0:35:08 > 0:35:12'She's a very confident 14-year-old.'
0:35:12 > 0:35:15Doesn't that help? It does, doesn't it?
0:35:15 > 0:35:16Yes, it did.
0:35:16 > 0:35:18And that's nice.
0:35:18 > 0:35:20Yep.
0:35:24 > 0:35:27Today a high-profile visitor, who knows exactly
0:35:27 > 0:35:31what the families are going through, comes to the centre.
0:35:32 > 0:35:37The shadow chancellor, Ed Balls, has battled with a stammer throughout his career,
0:35:37 > 0:35:40but has only recently begun to talk publicly about it.
0:35:40 > 0:35:43Reggie, nice to meet you. Hi there.
0:35:43 > 0:35:45- Hi.- Hi there, William. Hello.
0:35:47 > 0:35:48Right, I'm taking my jacket off, it's a bit warm in here.
0:35:50 > 0:35:57You may not know it, but I've always had a stammer as well, and maybe you had that explained,
0:35:57 > 0:35:58but I'm also a politician.
0:35:58 > 0:36:03I've been talking to the TV and radio all day so far.
0:36:03 > 0:36:06I'm a bit further down the track than you guys, cos you're only starting out on your course,
0:36:06 > 0:36:09but the key thing is just to stick with it.
0:36:09 > 0:36:13That one visit that we had that was the one who gave me most hope.
0:36:14 > 0:36:18Never, ever realised that Ed Balls had a stammer.
0:36:18 > 0:36:21It amazed me, cos, obviously, I've seen you on TV, you know.
0:36:21 > 0:36:25- Sometimes people write about me saying, that he's a cured stammerer. He used to have a stammer.
0:36:25 > 0:36:29- And you have to say to people, never, ever...- No.- stop.
0:36:29 > 0:36:32I can't start a sentence with an H, it's just a killer.
0:36:32 > 0:36:37And therefore if I've ever got to do a speech or anything in public,
0:36:37 > 0:36:39if I've got to read it out, they've got to be my words,
0:36:39 > 0:36:43cos there's certain sentences I'll never be able to start, certain consonants whatever.
0:36:43 > 0:36:46The only thing which is really hard is the Bible, cos you can't rewrite it.
0:36:46 > 0:36:50It showed to me that, you know, my fear for William
0:36:50 > 0:36:56is that he's very intelligent, he is a perfectionist, but would his stammer get in the way of
0:36:56 > 0:37:00what could be a career for him in whatever path he takes.
0:37:00 > 0:37:02Ready, set, go.
0:37:08 > 0:37:13I think that was probably a turning point for me.
0:37:14 > 0:37:18A real weight had been lifted off my shoulders. You know what?
0:37:18 > 0:37:23This isn't as bad as maybe I thought it was.
0:37:23 > 0:37:28Part of what one hopes that the stammering centre can do, indeed any form of addressing stammering,
0:37:28 > 0:37:31is to demystify it and say it does happen to people.
0:37:31 > 0:37:37It happens to quite a lot of people. It happens to, you know, Winston Churchill, Ed Balls, whoever.
0:37:37 > 0:37:41But if you say, well I've got lots of other people who stammer, and actually I've got lots of things
0:37:41 > 0:37:45I'm interested in, and I can play football really well, so up yours, mate.
0:37:49 > 0:37:51Ah, very good.
0:37:53 > 0:37:57Speaking to others within the safety of a group is one thing,
0:37:57 > 0:38:00but after nine days working on their confidence,
0:38:00 > 0:38:06the children must summon all their courage to talk to strangers on the street.
0:38:07 > 0:38:10For Reggie this means coming out of his shell.
0:38:12 > 0:38:19What we were hoping to see is him interacting more, communicating more
0:38:19 > 0:38:27with more eye contact, rather than focusing on being more fluent.
0:38:27 > 0:38:30- Is that OK?- That's fine. - We've only got two questions.- OK.
0:38:30 > 0:38:35- Yeah. - Do you know what stammering is?
0:38:35 > 0:38:40- Oh, yes.- Do you have a...j-job?
0:38:40 > 0:38:42Yes.
0:38:42 > 0:38:45OK. All right.
0:38:45 > 0:38:48You look at the person when you're asking it.
0:38:48 > 0:38:49- Yeah.- OK?
0:38:49 > 0:38:52- Yeah.- Can you do that?- Yeah.- OK.
0:38:53 > 0:38:55- Eye contact this time.- Yeah.
0:38:56 > 0:38:59Do you know what stammering is?
0:38:59 > 0:39:01Can you explain to me?
0:39:01 > 0:39:06It...is when people have pro...
0:39:06 > 0:39:13have pro...have pro...have pro...
0:39:13 > 0:39:22have problems with their t-t... with their talking.
0:39:22 > 0:39:24OK. Thank you.
0:39:24 > 0:39:27- OK.- Thank you.- Well done.
0:39:27 > 0:39:29Well done, Reggie. You kept going.
0:39:29 > 0:39:33OK? And what I'm really impressed with, you got it out.
0:39:33 > 0:39:35Yeah, well done, Reggie.
0:39:35 > 0:39:40- And did anybody notice anything else about his eye contact?- Yep.- What?
0:39:40 > 0:39:42He looked up most of the time.
0:39:42 > 0:39:46Well, there was more eye contact than the two times before, Reggie.
0:39:46 > 0:39:48High five, Reggie.
0:39:48 > 0:39:52- Yeah. Cool as a cucumber.- Very. Yeah, exactly, very confident.
0:39:56 > 0:39:59It's been a really good week for Reggie.
0:39:59 > 0:40:03I think he's doing amazingly and he is very much a part of the group, you know.
0:40:03 > 0:40:08I'm just seeing him coming back into the fold of the family just a little bit more.
0:40:08 > 0:40:12And for me, if this two weeks achieves that that's a massive thing for me.
0:40:12 > 0:40:16- Yeah, he's joining in a little bit more. That's a big step. - Coming into the fold of the family.
0:40:16 > 0:40:18Mmm.
0:40:18 > 0:40:22# Happy birthday to you
0:40:22 > 0:40:28# Happy birthday dear Reggie
0:40:28 > 0:40:35# Happy birthday to you. #
0:40:42 > 0:40:43Wow, these look good, Reg.
0:40:43 > 0:40:47He is a man now. He's 11, aren't you?
0:40:47 > 0:40:50- Yep.- My little man. My big man.
0:40:50 > 0:40:54- There's one more present here. - Look, Reg, look.
0:40:54 > 0:40:56- I want you to open it. - Reg, this is for you.
0:40:56 > 0:40:58Read it out.
0:40:58 > 0:41:01Wowee! Look.
0:41:01 > 0:41:05Yeah, happy birthday Reggie, you're going on a special behind-the-scenes
0:41:05 > 0:41:11- tour of the Palaeontology Department at the Natural History Museum. You're a lucky boy.- Yeah!
0:41:11 > 0:41:15- You're a lucky boy, aren't you?- Yay!
0:41:15 > 0:41:24And that's all we wanted, for him to react with his brother and sisters and have a normal family life.
0:41:24 > 0:41:26And he's really starting to do that.
0:41:26 > 0:41:28We've just seen him blossom.
0:41:29 > 0:41:35SLOWLY: Hello, Reggie, where are we going?
0:41:39 > 0:41:43SMOOTHLY: To the Natural History Museum.
0:41:43 > 0:41:45Oh, great.
0:41:45 > 0:41:51SLOWLY: I think we'll see some dinosaurs.
0:41:54 > 0:42:00Ooh, we're nearly there. It's, um, er...over here, I think.
0:42:06 > 0:42:08- Hello, Reggie, how's it going? - Good.- I'm Tim.
0:42:08 > 0:42:11- You're a real life palaeontologist. - Indeed, in the flesh.- Hello.- Hi.- Hi.
0:42:11 > 0:42:13- How's it going? - Good, thank you.- Hi.
0:42:13 > 0:42:16- Excited.- So I hear dinosaurs are your favourite thing.
0:42:16 > 0:42:18- Yeah. - Which dinosaur's your favourite?
0:42:18 > 0:42:28My favourite one is baryonyx.
0:42:28 > 0:42:32What do you know about baryonyx?
0:42:32 > 0:42:43SLOWLY, SMOOTHLY: That it was found in the 1980s by Bill Walker.
0:42:43 > 0:42:46Yeah. Yeah. That's amazing knowledge.
0:42:46 > 0:42:49I'm really impressed. D'you want to go and see some specimens? Yeah?
0:42:49 > 0:42:51Yeah.
0:42:51 > 0:42:58- What do you think this is? - A sauropod leg.- Yep, absolutely it.
0:42:58 > 0:43:05It is Centrosaurus.
0:43:05 > 0:43:08- Wow!- Is that right?- Yeah, it is right. I'm really impressed.
0:43:08 > 0:43:11- I think you can lead the rest of the tour now.- Yeah.
0:43:11 > 0:43:16Well, we were never more proud of him than when he
0:43:16 > 0:43:22- started trading knowledge with the gentleman at the Natural History Museum, it just blew us away.- Yeah.
0:43:22 > 0:43:25I think it blew him away as well.
0:43:25 > 0:43:29But can you tell me which part of the dinosaur that is?
0:43:31 > 0:43:33The hip.
0:43:33 > 0:43:34Oh, excellent. Yeah.
0:43:34 > 0:43:38- You're absolutely right.- Oh, yeah.
0:43:38 > 0:43:43So there we go. But do you know what this claw was used for?
0:43:43 > 0:43:46For hooking fish.
0:43:46 > 0:43:49- Yeah, fantastic. Yeah.- Nothing you can get past him, is there?
0:43:49 > 0:43:51No. You're amazing.
0:43:51 > 0:43:57I recall him standing there almost like some sort of professor with his hands on his hips talking to,
0:43:57 > 0:44:02you know, the palaeontologist almost on a level, and we were stood back.
0:44:02 > 0:44:07So what was the largest land carnivore ever to have lived?
0:44:07 > 0:44:10- Spinosaurus.- Absolutely right. Wow!
0:44:11 > 0:44:15He would never have done things like that before.
0:44:15 > 0:44:18That makes us proud, doesn't it?
0:44:18 > 0:44:20- He's a unique little boy.- Mmm.
0:44:20 > 0:44:23You having a good birthday, boy?
0:44:23 > 0:44:24Yep.
0:44:36 > 0:44:39These are individual children, all with their
0:44:39 > 0:44:47different talents, abilities, needs, feelings, emotions, it's all there, like in all of us.
0:44:47 > 0:44:52And in some ways the idea that stammerers can't talk, therefore you
0:44:52 > 0:44:57shouldn't talk to them, and that's sort of making it more difficult for them by asking them questions,
0:44:57 > 0:44:59seems to me something we've really got to get over.
0:44:59 > 0:45:01You've gotta talk to stammerers.
0:45:03 > 0:45:10The course is coming to an end, but there's just time for one final visitor to join the parents' group.
0:45:10 > 0:45:13Hello. Hello everyone. Hello.
0:45:13 > 0:45:16To go in a room and talk to the parents there, and you're right down
0:45:16 > 0:45:21to the very cutting edge of sort of their feelings, their emotions.
0:45:21 > 0:45:26It's just been so nice to be able to talk to each other
0:45:26 > 0:45:28- and to find a solution for ourselves.- Yeah.
0:45:28 > 0:45:33Is there anything that you learnt about how to
0:45:33 > 0:45:37deal with your children's stammer here that you didn't know before?
0:45:37 > 0:45:40- Just about everything. - Oh, yeah, OK. All right.
0:45:40 > 0:45:42Fair.
0:45:42 > 0:45:44It's about
0:45:44 > 0:45:47the centre enabling their children to do something that they
0:45:47 > 0:45:52were at times worried they would never be able to do...
0:45:52 > 0:45:54You know,
0:45:54 > 0:45:56that's very moving.
0:45:56 > 0:45:58Hello?
0:45:58 > 0:46:00- Hello.- Hello there.
0:46:00 > 0:46:03Hi. Hi. Do come on in.
0:46:03 > 0:46:06Will, I saw your hand go up first, so I'm choosing you.
0:46:06 > 0:46:11Before they leave for home, the children are asked to speak in front of an audience,
0:46:11 > 0:46:16something they'd have found almost impossible to do two weeks earlier.
0:46:16 > 0:46:21I like playing sports.
0:46:21 > 0:46:25I play sports a lot.
0:46:25 > 0:46:29- Do you think you're more OK with stammering now?- Definitely. Yeah.
0:46:29 > 0:46:35- Cos you wouldn't have said that before the course.- No. No.
0:46:35 > 0:46:42I would have just got depressed.
0:46:42 > 0:46:47- Yeah.- So d'you feel depressed now? - No.
0:46:48 > 0:46:53- Well, done. - APPLAUSE
0:46:53 > 0:46:56Bethan.
0:46:56 > 0:47:06Well, I'm going...to talk about ...the Titanic.
0:47:08 > 0:47:12How did you feel after you finished the course?
0:47:12 > 0:47:17Well, I felt a lot more confident.
0:47:17 > 0:47:19Well, done, Bethan.
0:47:23 > 0:47:26Reggie, up you come.
0:47:28 > 0:47:45Dinosaurs were reptiles that lived millions...of years...ago.
0:47:47 > 0:47:52- Do you feel different now you've finished the course at all?- Yeah.
0:47:52 > 0:47:55In what way?
0:47:55 > 0:47:58Because I am better at talking.
0:48:00 > 0:48:03Thank you, Reggie, well done.
0:48:03 > 0:48:06Give yourselves a round of applause. Very, very well done.
0:48:08 > 0:48:11How does that make you feel?
0:48:11 > 0:48:12Very good.
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