0:00:03 > 0:00:06Most people know me as the guy from X Factor
0:00:06 > 0:00:09who was put in this boy band called The Risk and who eventually quit.
0:00:09 > 0:00:12But I have a past. I have a story.
0:00:12 > 0:00:16And I'm more than just the guy from X Factor.
0:00:16 > 0:00:18I was put into care at the age of two
0:00:18 > 0:00:20and I stayed in care until I was an adult.
0:00:20 > 0:00:23'I was never adopted.
0:00:23 > 0:00:27'I spent my childhood moving from children's homes to foster families.
0:00:27 > 0:00:29'There are thousands of kids just like me.'
0:00:29 > 0:00:32I've had 35 addresses, but they're broken down into foster placements,
0:00:32 > 0:00:36children's homes, supported lodging placements, B&Bs...
0:00:36 > 0:00:39Do you know what any of the other guys are doing now?
0:00:39 > 0:00:41Unfortunately, two died.
0:00:41 > 0:00:45'I want to meet kids who are growing up now, just like I did,
0:00:45 > 0:00:47'with no permanent home.'
0:00:47 > 0:00:50Most people end up in jail, or they end up pregnant.
0:00:50 > 0:00:52Would you rather pay the pain of regret,
0:00:52 > 0:00:55where you spend a whole lifetime just hating your life
0:00:55 > 0:00:58and hating the fact that you didn't do anything with your life?
0:00:58 > 0:01:00It's dangerous.
0:01:00 > 0:01:06'And for the first time, I'm going to revisit my own time in care and confront my painful past.'
0:01:06 > 0:01:09I guess this place evokes a lot of ghosts and memories for me.
0:01:09 > 0:01:11Hey, how's it going, Mum?
0:01:11 > 0:01:15I think in my head, I know that I was in a bad situation.
0:01:15 > 0:01:16Mmm.
0:01:30 > 0:01:32I was put into care at the age of two.
0:01:32 > 0:01:35And I stayed in care until I was an adult.
0:01:37 > 0:01:41'I was never put up for adoption, in case my mum came back for me.
0:01:41 > 0:01:42'But she never did.'
0:01:43 > 0:01:47I lived in a foster home, then I moved to a children's home.
0:01:47 > 0:01:50Then to another foster home, then to another foster home.
0:01:50 > 0:01:53Four moves, four upheavals, four totally different worlds.
0:01:54 > 0:01:59'But despite this disruption, I did well at school and went on to study at Cambridge.'
0:02:01 > 0:02:05'Success stories for care kids are rare. I'm one of the lucky ones.
0:02:05 > 0:02:09'But even MY childhood was full of pain and disruption.'
0:02:11 > 0:02:15'One of my earliest memories is of being taken from my first foster mum, Cissy.
0:02:15 > 0:02:17'I was only four.'
0:02:18 > 0:02:23'I've always thought it was because of my own bad behaviour, but I've never known for sure.
0:02:23 > 0:02:28'So I'm going back to find out the real reason I was moved.'
0:02:28 > 0:02:30BELL RINGS
0:02:30 > 0:02:34- Ashley!- Cissy! How's it going?
0:02:34 > 0:02:37I loved Cissy, my first foster mum,
0:02:37 > 0:02:40but I was a bit of a handful for her, I think.
0:02:40 > 0:02:42More than she'd probably like to admit.
0:02:46 > 0:02:50'I remember one day being dragged home and grabbing onto her car
0:02:50 > 0:02:54'and I pull off the windshield, cos Cissy's trying to drag me, and the police get involved.
0:02:54 > 0:02:57'I was very inconvenient to an old lady.'
0:02:57 > 0:03:02Do you remember the day I left? You were cooking macaroni and cheese.
0:03:02 > 0:03:03Mmm-hmm.
0:03:03 > 0:03:07I remember it, and then I was watching CBeebies, you know,
0:03:07 > 0:03:09the children's programmes.
0:03:09 > 0:03:10And, erm...
0:03:12 > 0:03:14Yeah, it was such a normal day.
0:03:14 > 0:03:17- And then they came in the car, through the back garden.- Yeah.
0:03:17 > 0:03:20And you was like, "Ashley, you have to go now. Time to go now."
0:03:20 > 0:03:24- But you didn't want to leave this house.- No, I didn't want to leave.
0:03:24 > 0:03:27And you asked me, "Where am I going, Cissy?"
0:03:27 > 0:03:31And I said, "I'm getting old now, Ashley, so they have to put you with somebody younger."
0:03:31 > 0:03:36- And you believed me.- Yeah. - That's the only reason why you'd go, otherwise, you wouldn't go.
0:03:36 > 0:03:40- Yeah.- Social Service decide that he's too close to me.
0:03:40 > 0:03:43- They say you're too close to me. - It's a bit of a stupid reason.
0:03:43 > 0:03:45- No, it's not stupid. - Don't you think so?
0:03:45 > 0:03:49No. You see, you was young. Your mother wasn't there, just me.
0:03:49 > 0:03:52- Yeah.- You feel that I'm the mother figure, the grandmother figure.
0:03:52 > 0:03:54So they basically thought,
0:03:54 > 0:03:56"He's becoming too close to this family, so..."
0:03:56 > 0:03:59No, no, no, no. No, that's not what they mean.
0:03:59 > 0:04:04- They mean that you should meet other people.- Yeah.- Outside, as well.
0:04:04 > 0:04:06Instead of just keep seeing me all the time.
0:04:06 > 0:04:11- So you mix with other boys, you talk with your friends, you know, other people.- Yes.
0:04:11 > 0:04:16- So you was a much better person. - Do you think so?- Yes.
0:04:17 > 0:04:20- Mmm.- You're still the same nice person, but you know more people.
0:04:20 > 0:04:22You know, you don't feel that you...
0:04:22 > 0:04:25- I don't know. - You don't feel like you've got to just cling to one person.
0:04:25 > 0:04:27When I think about the average four-year-old,
0:04:27 > 0:04:32like, they want to be with who they perceive as their mum or their dad, you know.
0:04:32 > 0:04:36They stick close to their parents. They're often quite attached.
0:04:36 > 0:04:40- Surely that's natural and not something to be discouraged? - It is natural, it is natural.
0:04:40 > 0:04:44But when the person's not your parents, I think you should mix with other people.
0:04:44 > 0:04:46That when you move out...
0:04:46 > 0:04:51I think, you know, things could have been done better.
0:04:51 > 0:04:53I felt at home.
0:04:55 > 0:04:58'Having grown very attached to Cissy,
0:04:58 > 0:05:03'Social Services took me out of the foster home where I'd settled, and moved me to a children's home.'
0:05:05 > 0:05:07Can you every get over that?
0:05:07 > 0:05:09I remember that day so vividly.
0:05:11 > 0:05:16'Over a quarter of kids in care will spend time in a children's home.
0:05:16 > 0:05:19'I was moved to Roseberry Street children's home for five years.'
0:05:21 > 0:05:25'It housed up to seven kids with backgrounds of abuse, poverty and neglect.'
0:05:27 > 0:05:30'It's now a derelict site.'
0:05:30 > 0:05:34The house was here and this garden was from here backwards,
0:05:34 > 0:05:39all around there. This was the garden, the house, the garage.
0:05:40 > 0:05:45I guess, erm, you know, this place kind of evokes a lot of ghosts and memories for me.
0:05:55 > 0:05:58'Aged eight, I was already in my second foster placement.
0:05:58 > 0:06:00'It's a familiar story.
0:06:00 > 0:06:03'Most foster kids spend their childhoods moving around.'
0:06:05 > 0:06:10'At 16, the system can start to treat you as an adult. But this doesn't mean the moving stops.'
0:06:12 > 0:06:14'Sarah's been in care since she was 14.
0:06:14 > 0:06:17'At 17, it was decided she was old enough to strike out alone.
0:06:17 > 0:06:20'Since then, she's been in three different hostels.'
0:06:20 > 0:06:25Did you ever find the freedom you had was a bit scary and daunting,
0:06:25 > 0:06:29- when you moved into your hostel? - Yes and no.- Yes and no?
0:06:29 > 0:06:33- At first, I loved it.- Yeah.- And then after, I thought, "Wow."
0:06:33 > 0:06:37Like, it's a bit weird, you know, my foster mum said, "Ring me," make sure I was all right.
0:06:37 > 0:06:42And when I didn't have that no more, it was like, "Wow, like, no-one actually cares!"
0:06:42 > 0:06:43Wow.
0:06:43 > 0:06:44Do you know what I mean?
0:06:44 > 0:06:49From all the people that I'm meeting and even from my own experience,
0:06:49 > 0:06:51you know, many care leavers, when they get to 18,
0:06:51 > 0:06:54it's like Social Services just turf them out, you know.
0:06:54 > 0:06:58They push them into the big wide world to fend by themselves.
0:06:58 > 0:07:02You're always on the edge. You're always expecting for something to happen.
0:07:02 > 0:07:08It was expected for a relationship to break down - boyfriend, girlfriend, family, friends.
0:07:08 > 0:07:10You're always expecting something. Hostel...
0:07:10 > 0:07:13You're always expecting something and you're always living on the edge.
0:07:13 > 0:07:20What you're telling me just reminds me of the devastating fact that so many people in care end up homeless.
0:07:20 > 0:07:22And can you understand why that happens?
0:07:24 > 0:07:28Yeah. I do. Because you don't have the emotional support.
0:07:28 > 0:07:33If you're being moved around all the time and you haven't got no-one to turn to,
0:07:33 > 0:07:36- then you're going to basically give up.- Wow.
0:07:37 > 0:07:42Or, like... I don't know, most people, they end up either in jail,
0:07:42 > 0:07:48or they end up pregnant or... involved in some sort of something
0:07:48 > 0:07:51and they don't even know how they got there in the first place.
0:07:56 > 0:07:59'Often children don't know why they're being moved,
0:07:59 > 0:08:01'or where they're going.
0:08:01 > 0:08:05'And with no-one to talk to, foster care can be a lonely place to be.'
0:08:08 > 0:08:10'I'm visiting a support group called Voice,
0:08:10 > 0:08:14'which gives people who have been in care a chance to talk about what they've been through.'
0:08:16 > 0:08:21I've been in care since I was six months old. I've had 35 addresses.
0:08:21 > 0:08:22Erm...
0:08:22 > 0:08:27but they're broken down into foster placements, children's homes -
0:08:27 > 0:08:31I was in two children's homes - supported lodgings placements, B&Bs.
0:08:31 > 0:08:36Some of them places were really good, but then some of them were pretty bad.
0:08:36 > 0:08:40One lot of foster carers, they used to send me and my brother away for Christmas,
0:08:40 > 0:08:42because they said that was family time.
0:08:42 > 0:08:45So we didn't get really involved in any of their family activities.
0:08:45 > 0:08:47Never really felt like part of the family.
0:08:47 > 0:08:53When I was moving to houses, I remember moving, like, three times from when I was like 11 till 13.
0:08:53 > 0:08:55And I was thinking, "Who are these people?"
0:08:55 > 0:08:59Like, I wouldn't come downstairs to eat. For like two weeks, I would not eat.
0:08:59 > 0:09:02- I'm not surprised.- I would stay up in my room. Like, I wouldn't even go to school.
0:09:02 > 0:09:03I was like, "No."
0:09:03 > 0:09:07Cos I would have to come downstairs and basically introduce myself to people I don't know.
0:09:07 > 0:09:10How many of you have felt that, you know, in order to live in a home
0:09:10 > 0:09:15and be successful and to stay there for a long time, it's dependent on how you behave?
0:09:15 > 0:09:20I've had, like, three placements that I've been so that if I wasn't, like, well behaved,
0:09:20 > 0:09:25or if I did this, or if I had an argument or something, I would have to move straightaway.
0:09:25 > 0:09:29But, like, when I first went there, the rules were "behave".
0:09:29 > 0:09:37My life wasn't really stable until I was 14 and moved in with, you know, who I consider Mum and Dad now.
0:09:37 > 0:09:40Like, you know, a decent set of foster carers, that they did put the effort in
0:09:40 > 0:09:44and did stick with me through all of my, like, bad behaviour.
0:09:44 > 0:09:47But until then, people just weren't resilient enough.
0:09:47 > 0:09:50They were like, "This kid's a little git. We'll just move him on."
0:09:50 > 0:09:54Know what I mean? "There's thousands of other kids in care, we'll just get another one."
0:10:05 > 0:10:09With all the kids I've met, they have one thing in common
0:10:09 > 0:10:11there's no stability.
0:10:11 > 0:10:15Scott has lived in 35 addresses, which is crazy.
0:10:15 > 0:10:19He's my age and he's moved so much, you know, during his time in care.
0:10:19 > 0:10:23It's such a crazy existence when you're moving about so much
0:10:23 > 0:10:25and I think stability,
0:10:25 > 0:10:28it needs to be implemented better for young people
0:10:28 > 0:10:30because without stability,
0:10:30 > 0:10:33you're pretty much destroyed from a young age.
0:10:37 > 0:10:41It's clear to me that kids in care are still being moved around
0:10:41 > 0:10:43all the time and I want to know why.
0:10:46 > 0:10:48I'm meeting an expert
0:10:48 > 0:10:52from the Fostering Network to find out where things are going wrong.
0:10:53 > 0:10:56On this journey, I'm realising that so many kids
0:10:56 > 0:10:59get moved about so much. I got moved four times.
0:10:59 > 0:11:01Because there's a shortage of foster carers,
0:11:01 > 0:11:05when a child or young person comes into care,
0:11:05 > 0:11:09it may mean that there's a family 60 miles away,
0:11:09 > 0:11:13which may mean they have to move schools,
0:11:13 > 0:11:16they may have to be split up from their brothers and sisters
0:11:16 > 0:11:18and have to live a long way from their family.
0:11:18 > 0:11:23Or what can happen is that a child will move from home to home
0:11:23 > 0:11:25until a suitable family is found.
0:11:25 > 0:11:28How can these moves affect young people?
0:11:28 > 0:11:33Well, if a young person is moved from family to family,
0:11:33 > 0:11:36they can feel abandoned.
0:11:36 > 0:11:39It affects their ability to form relationships.
0:11:39 > 0:11:43They may fall... End up in the kind of same relationship,
0:11:43 > 0:11:46the same pattern that they've been going through.
0:11:46 > 0:11:49So a lot of children that have been through the care system,
0:11:49 > 0:11:51their own children end up in care.
0:11:51 > 0:11:54Do you think there's a crisis in the fostering system?
0:11:54 > 0:11:56Yeah, I certainly do.
0:11:56 > 0:12:00The foster care system is bursting at the seams.
0:12:00 > 0:12:03We have huge numbers of children coming into foster care.
0:12:03 > 0:12:07Children are coming into foster care earlier.
0:12:07 > 0:12:10Local authorities are being more risk averse.
0:12:10 > 0:12:13This year alone, we need an additional 9,000 foster families
0:12:13 > 0:12:17to look after those children and to replace the ones that are leaving.
0:12:17 > 0:12:19If you speak to social workers,
0:12:19 > 0:12:22a lot will tell you that a lot of children come into care
0:12:22 > 0:12:27on a Friday night, six, seven o'clock in the evening.
0:12:27 > 0:12:29And so I've heard stories,
0:12:29 > 0:12:32and as far as I understand, it happens quite frequently,
0:12:32 > 0:12:36social workers just going through their list of foster carers,
0:12:36 > 0:12:38phoning them up and saying,
0:12:38 > 0:12:41"Have you got a bed for the night to look after this young person?"
0:12:41 > 0:12:45There is a lot of stigma attached to being in foster care
0:12:45 > 0:12:47and actually, although you hear a lot of celebrities
0:12:47 > 0:12:51talking about being adopted, you hear very few celebrities,
0:12:51 > 0:12:56well-known people, talking about growing up in the care system.
0:12:56 > 0:12:57There are problems,
0:12:57 > 0:13:01there are difficulties, but it's not something to be ashamed of.
0:13:06 > 0:13:09My last foster placement was one of my happiest.
0:13:09 > 0:13:12Freesia and Irvin made me feel welcome
0:13:12 > 0:13:14and part of their family.
0:13:14 > 0:13:16I'm grateful they took me in,
0:13:16 > 0:13:18but I've never asked them what it's like
0:13:18 > 0:13:19to be a foster parent.
0:13:19 > 0:13:21Those are bits and pieces.
0:13:21 > 0:13:23What was I like when I first came?
0:13:23 > 0:13:26He was quiet and, um...
0:13:26 > 0:13:28Yeah, he was polite.
0:13:28 > 0:13:31He wanted to make a really good impression, and you did, actually.
0:13:31 > 0:13:34It took him about a week to settle in and then...
0:13:34 > 0:13:36THEY LAUGH
0:13:36 > 0:13:38For the first week, he was neat, he was tidy.
0:13:38 > 0:13:41He'd washed up his cups and plates.
0:13:41 > 0:13:44I remember cos the foster carer before,
0:13:44 > 0:13:46I mean, I nearly got kicked out at one point
0:13:46 > 0:13:48cos I didn't wash my cups up.
0:13:48 > 0:13:52I mean, sometimes your... your position as a foster child
0:13:52 > 0:13:56is that, you know, fragile that if you do something wrong,
0:13:56 > 0:13:59you're kicked out because the foster carer can't handle it.
0:13:59 > 0:14:02So I certainly... But I felt comfortable here so quickly.
0:14:02 > 0:14:05I realised that I didn't have to...
0:14:05 > 0:14:07- You didn't have to perform. - Yeah.- Yeah.
0:14:07 > 0:14:10Yeah. Then I missed performing so I'll dish up today.
0:14:10 > 0:14:12THEY LAUGH
0:14:13 > 0:14:17- You go on. You take yours. - You already had one of these ones?
0:14:18 > 0:14:21Foster caring, from our point of view,
0:14:21 > 0:14:24I believe it should be a job, yeah? And it should be viewed as a job
0:14:24 > 0:14:28because the emphasis is all about the children,
0:14:28 > 0:14:30which rightly so, but it also needs
0:14:30 > 0:14:33to have some emphasis about the carers
0:14:33 > 0:14:36and I think that if they have more emphasis on the carers,
0:14:36 > 0:14:39also, you'll get, you encourage more people.
0:14:39 > 0:14:42- There is a shortage of carers. Why is there a shortage of carers?- Yeah.
0:14:42 > 0:14:45Why doesn't people want to open their homes
0:14:45 > 0:14:46and allow a child to come in?
0:14:46 > 0:14:48Why do you think that is?
0:14:48 > 0:14:50I just think that, um...
0:14:50 > 0:14:52I just think it should be deemed as a job.
0:14:52 > 0:14:55See, I've always thought
0:14:55 > 0:14:57that foster parenting shouldn't be a job,
0:14:57 > 0:14:59but I see what you're saying.
0:14:59 > 0:15:02If the foster parent is doing a good job,
0:15:02 > 0:15:06I won't see you as doing a job, and I think often,
0:15:06 > 0:15:10foster carers can have a quite blase, indifferent attitude towards it
0:15:10 > 0:15:14and so they don't handle the responsibility as well as they could.
0:15:14 > 0:15:17They don't take the training as seriously.
0:15:17 > 0:15:19So that's good food for thought.
0:15:19 > 0:15:20Mm. It's something to think about
0:15:20 > 0:15:25because if you look at it from our point of view, um...
0:15:25 > 0:15:28we still have to live, we still have to have a roof over your head,
0:15:28 > 0:15:29we've still got bills to pay.
0:15:29 > 0:15:32And I don't really like to bring it down to money
0:15:32 > 0:15:33cos it's more than money.
0:15:33 > 0:15:37It's a vocation and if you're called to be a foster carer
0:15:37 > 0:15:40you do it wholeheartedly, yeah? Because you want to do it.
0:15:40 > 0:15:42It's not something you can just go into it
0:15:42 > 0:15:45because you think it's a good idea cos you won't last the course.
0:15:45 > 0:15:49I've asked loads of people, "Would you do fostering?"
0:15:49 > 0:15:51They've said, "No." And these are nice people,
0:15:51 > 0:15:54but they've said, "No, I couldn't." I said, "Why's that?"
0:15:54 > 0:15:56They said, "I couldn't just open my home to a stranger."
0:15:56 > 0:16:00Well, you know. So it is a calling. It's definitely...
0:16:00 > 0:16:01It's not for everybody.
0:16:01 > 0:16:04It's not something you go, "Oh, I'm just going to do it."
0:16:04 > 0:16:07Not only that, actually, before...
0:16:07 > 0:16:09OK, it's a calling, but apart from just a calling,
0:16:09 > 0:16:13when you actually go for the training, it's very, very difficult.
0:16:13 > 0:16:16It is very, very intrusive. On our course,
0:16:16 > 0:16:19- we probably had... 20 people.- Mm.
0:16:19 > 0:16:23- And how many got through? Five? - Really?- Yeah.- Wow.
0:16:23 > 0:16:27I've never, ever thought of fostering in terms of being a job,
0:16:27 > 0:16:29but it does make some sense
0:16:29 > 0:16:33because these guys, they're trained for the role.
0:16:33 > 0:16:37They can't treat me, you know, fully like their biological children
0:16:37 > 0:16:40cos there are, you know, rules and guidelines
0:16:40 > 0:16:42which they have to abide by.
0:16:42 > 0:16:45And so they are consciously trying to uphold a certain role
0:16:45 > 0:16:49and so I can understand that, for them, it's a job.
0:16:49 > 0:16:52But when they are doing it as a job, if they're doing a good job,
0:16:52 > 0:16:55I'm not aware that it's a job. I see them as family.
0:17:01 > 0:17:03My time with Freesia and Irvin took me through
0:17:03 > 0:17:07a crucial stage at school. While I was with them, I did well
0:17:07 > 0:17:11in important exams and ended up going to uni.
0:17:13 > 0:17:16But when you're a child struggling with upheavals,
0:17:16 > 0:17:20I know that school can be the last place you want to be.
0:17:21 > 0:17:25- Hello. How're you doing? - Hi. I'm Kay.- My name's Ashley.
0:17:25 > 0:17:28- Hold the door. Hello. Good to meet you.- Nice to meet you.
0:17:28 > 0:17:3315-year-old Shannon has been in a children's home for nine months.
0:17:33 > 0:17:35In spite of the home's best efforts,
0:17:35 > 0:17:39she is refusing to go to school and I wanted to see if I could help.
0:17:41 > 0:17:44How long haven't you gone to school for?
0:17:44 > 0:17:47About...six months.
0:17:48 > 0:17:51I was in a children's home.
0:17:51 > 0:17:53Most of the guys I lived with didn't go to school,
0:17:53 > 0:17:57but I was always pushed to go to school...
0:17:57 > 0:17:59and I went to uni.
0:17:59 > 0:18:03I've got a really good degree and, you know, it gives me options now.
0:18:03 > 0:18:05Yeah.
0:18:05 > 0:18:08But there are people who I lived with who didn't go to school
0:18:08 > 0:18:10and they have no options and their, you know,
0:18:10 > 0:18:14their alternative is 50 quid a week Jobseekers Allowance
0:18:14 > 0:18:18and a flat and...it's just,
0:18:18 > 0:18:20it's a horrible existence.
0:18:20 > 0:18:22Like, when people don't go school,
0:18:22 > 0:18:24or they don't care about their education,
0:18:24 > 0:18:28I mean, that's a dangerous place to be in...
0:18:28 > 0:18:30especially as a foster child,
0:18:30 > 0:18:32or someone who lives in a children's home.
0:18:32 > 0:18:34It's dangerous.
0:18:34 > 0:18:38If you don't go school, it's only going to affect you.
0:18:38 > 0:18:41Or would you rather pay the pain of regret
0:18:41 > 0:18:44where you spend the whole lifetime just hating your life
0:18:44 > 0:18:47and hating the fact that you didn't do anything with your life?
0:18:47 > 0:18:49- Doing something about it.- Exactly.
0:18:49 > 0:18:54I think my past has a lot to play for what I do at the moment.
0:18:55 > 0:18:58I always go back to what had happened
0:18:58 > 0:19:00instead of saying, "That has happened."
0:19:01 > 0:19:04But I don't do that.
0:19:04 > 0:19:07As foster children... we have this thing
0:19:07 > 0:19:09that nobody cares about us, right?
0:19:09 > 0:19:12We often think that and I know that I did at times,
0:19:12 > 0:19:17but...you can care about yourself, even if no-one else does.
0:19:17 > 0:19:19Please don't waste your time.
0:19:19 > 0:19:22Sorry to sound like really...
0:19:22 > 0:19:24Please, man.
0:19:24 > 0:19:26I think what you've just said there has got more power
0:19:26 > 0:19:30than what we've been saying to her for the last six months.
0:19:30 > 0:19:32I think you might've just got through to her.
0:19:32 > 0:19:36No-one's really spoken to me like... that sort of way before.
0:19:36 > 0:19:39So...
0:19:47 > 0:19:51Children in care are ten times more likely to get excluded from school.
0:19:52 > 0:19:56And my early reports show I was heading in that direction.
0:19:59 > 0:20:02"Recently Ashley was one of a group of boys who were involved
0:20:02 > 0:20:05"in what can only be described as an act of vandalism.
0:20:05 > 0:20:09"The estimate for their damage is £135."
0:20:09 > 0:20:13I remember very clearly that I got kicked out of my primary school.
0:20:13 > 0:20:19I got expelled for, basically, accidentally kicking my head teacher in the nose.
0:20:20 > 0:20:22The head teacher's holding me and I release my foot
0:20:22 > 0:20:25and I kick him in the nose and give him a nosebleed.
0:20:25 > 0:20:29So, um, I was just, I was just...
0:20:29 > 0:20:34When I was young, extremely angry, rebellious, looking for attention
0:20:34 > 0:20:37and I'm just glad that that didn't, you know,
0:20:37 > 0:20:40carry on into my teen, my late teenage years.
0:20:40 > 0:20:43You know, this behaviour is the making of a criminal.
0:20:43 > 0:20:48This behaviour is the making of someone who doesn't get a good education.
0:20:48 > 0:20:52This behaviour is the making of someone who...you know,
0:20:52 > 0:20:54could end up in prison, to be frank.
0:21:00 > 0:21:04Plenty of the kids I've grown up with eventually turn to crime, drugs
0:21:04 > 0:21:05and ended up in prison.
0:21:05 > 0:21:08Over a quarter of people currently in prison
0:21:08 > 0:21:10were in care as a child.
0:21:12 > 0:21:16'I'm meeting 22-year-old Jerome, who grew up with his brother in care...'
0:21:16 > 0:21:18This is where the magic happens.
0:21:18 > 0:21:20'..but his brother is now in prison.'
0:21:21 > 0:21:24Well, this is my brother's album,
0:21:24 > 0:21:26but we've both got pictures together, kind of thing.
0:21:26 > 0:21:30But I just... This is like a little storyboard. So when I was four,
0:21:30 > 0:21:32- and that's my mum there. - Is that your mum?
0:21:32 > 0:21:36- That's my brother and my sister. - That is so similar to my mum.
0:21:36 > 0:21:37- Is it?- Yeah.
0:21:37 > 0:21:41Jerome's mum had various difficulties and struggled
0:21:41 > 0:21:45to look after the kids, so they were taken into care.
0:21:48 > 0:21:50He's taken me to see the childhood home
0:21:50 > 0:21:52where he lived with his mum and brother.
0:21:52 > 0:21:56I don't really like to be around here because it's not the best memories.
0:21:56 > 0:21:58Can you actually point the building that you lived in?
0:21:58 > 0:22:02It's this one here. If we go through here...
0:22:02 > 0:22:04This doesn't look too much different
0:22:04 > 0:22:07from when I was a little kid, you know.
0:22:07 > 0:22:10Obviously, I had mad memories here, you know.
0:22:10 > 0:22:12So it's like, I don't know.
0:22:12 > 0:22:15A lot of it's to do with pain, kind of thing.
0:22:15 > 0:22:18So you don't really want to remember it, but you kind of use it.
0:22:18 > 0:22:20Now I just use it.
0:22:20 > 0:22:23Round the corner, my friend used to live.
0:22:23 > 0:22:25He was in care as well, but he killed himself.
0:22:25 > 0:22:28So this, I ain't really got too much good memories around,
0:22:28 > 0:22:32but for him, it's like emotionally, you could've given him everything,
0:22:32 > 0:22:35but if you didn't deal with what was deep inside him,
0:22:35 > 0:22:40you lost him already. So... I think he just couldn't hack it really.
0:22:41 > 0:22:44What do you remember of leaving this house?
0:22:44 > 0:22:46I remember being at nursery
0:22:46 > 0:22:48and then me and my brother, they're telling us,
0:22:48 > 0:22:50"Your mum's ill. You can't go back home."
0:22:50 > 0:22:52And we was just like, "Huh?!"
0:22:52 > 0:22:56- Next you know, in care watching Tom and Jerry on the sofa.- That's mental.
0:22:56 > 0:22:58And it's weird cos like, when you're four,
0:22:58 > 0:23:01you think you wouldn't remember it, but you remember that day.
0:23:01 > 0:23:03Like, I remember it clearly.
0:23:06 > 0:23:08After eight years in one foster home,
0:23:08 > 0:23:11Jerome and his brother were eventually split up.
0:23:13 > 0:23:15Whilst Jerome stayed in a stable home,
0:23:15 > 0:23:19his brother was shunted around the system.
0:23:19 > 0:23:21He went missing at 14,
0:23:21 > 0:23:23was placed in a secure unit
0:23:23 > 0:23:25and is now in jail.
0:23:25 > 0:23:28The more you move them, the more you scar them because it's like,
0:23:28 > 0:23:31you're just letting me know I'm a kid in care
0:23:31 > 0:23:34and more people don't care about me.
0:23:34 > 0:23:36It was easier to let him run riot and do what he's doing
0:23:36 > 0:23:39than to actually say, "We're going to help this kid
0:23:39 > 0:23:44"and help him get out of the situation he's in now, or whatever he's going through."
0:23:44 > 0:23:48Rather than... Cos it's more work. It takes more, it costs more money.
0:23:48 > 0:23:52so it's like to me, the care system is about, you know, caring.
0:23:52 > 0:23:55But when you ask the kids,
0:23:55 > 0:23:56"OK, what do you want?"
0:23:56 > 0:23:58They simple things like,
0:23:58 > 0:24:00"I want my foster carer to give me a hug,"
0:24:00 > 0:24:02or, "I want my carer to call me when I've had an exam,"
0:24:02 > 0:24:07or, "My social worker to call me when I've finished playing football,"
0:24:07 > 0:24:09or, "I've done this show. Come to my show."
0:24:09 > 0:24:12They're the simple things and none of that costs money.
0:24:12 > 0:24:14It's all about just being there for someone,
0:24:14 > 0:24:16and this is where we're losing track, I guess.
0:24:18 > 0:24:21Have you ever blamed yourself?
0:24:21 > 0:24:24If I could take back time, I'd say I would've moved on
0:24:24 > 0:24:26with him so that we're together.
0:24:26 > 0:24:29Then no matter what, then we go through it together.
0:24:32 > 0:24:33I was looking at his pictures.
0:24:33 > 0:24:36I was looking at the cherished childhood memories,
0:24:36 > 0:24:38how happy they seemed. That's great,
0:24:38 > 0:24:40but that's just been...
0:24:40 > 0:24:43That gets torn up when you separate that, when you kill that.
0:24:43 > 0:24:47I'm glad that I didn't have to go through separation.
0:24:47 > 0:24:50I really hope that obviously when he comes out he's just...
0:24:50 > 0:24:54more on this kind of, "I want to do better for myself."
0:24:54 > 0:24:57He's very smart. Very smart guy.
0:24:57 > 0:25:01I think sometimes, the way he handles certain situations,
0:25:01 > 0:25:02he needs to be smarter.
0:25:02 > 0:25:04- Take care, man. - All good, man.- Pleasure.
0:25:04 > 0:25:06- All the best. - Yeah, man, keep it up, mate.
0:25:18 > 0:25:22'It's clear to me that being moved around the care system
0:25:22 > 0:25:25'can cause lasting damage.'
0:25:25 > 0:25:29The truth is, many foster kids are not OK.
0:25:29 > 0:25:32Many foster kids my age and older
0:25:32 > 0:25:35are still battling with the demons of when they were five years old.
0:25:38 > 0:25:42If you're a foster kid who has had to kind of accept that,
0:25:42 > 0:25:47for whatever reason, your parents don't want to look after you,
0:25:47 > 0:25:50that's rejection. Looking back at my life,
0:25:50 > 0:25:53there were certainly times where I acted from that feeling.
0:25:53 > 0:25:56I can see the subconscious patterns in my thinking,
0:25:56 > 0:25:59when I was younger, when I look back.
0:25:59 > 0:26:02And I clearly operated out of rejection
0:26:02 > 0:26:05and wanting attention and wanting approval and wanting love.
0:26:16 > 0:26:20'I've just found out that, after just a few weeks,
0:26:20 > 0:26:22'Sarah has to change hostels again.
0:26:22 > 0:26:27'Tonight, she's moving her things across town to a new place in Soho.'
0:26:28 > 0:26:32- Don't you have bags for all of this? - No, listen...- You've a blue bag.
0:26:32 > 0:26:34They made me move in bin bags.
0:26:40 > 0:26:43SHE SIGHS My days!
0:26:51 > 0:26:54- Is there any more stuff upstairs? - Yes.
0:26:59 > 0:27:03- Are you used to things ending badly like this?- Yeah.
0:27:03 > 0:27:07Well, my life, I'll be honest with you, this is as good as my life gets.
0:27:07 > 0:27:11- Placement and displacement...- I beg to differ there, beg to differ.
0:27:11 > 0:27:14- But I hope...- Come on.- ..fingers crossed, this is the last one.
0:27:14 > 0:27:16- You're like...- Fingers crossed.
0:27:16 > 0:27:18As much as you can be moved, you're at college,
0:27:18 > 0:27:21doing your advertising, you can go to uni, get a student loan,
0:27:21 > 0:27:24you can get a good career in graphics, build some good...
0:27:24 > 0:27:26It's not, I mean...
0:27:26 > 0:27:30- It's not the end of the world, yeah. - It's very limiting to say this is the best it'll get for you.
0:27:30 > 0:27:34No, when I say it's the best it'll get for me, I mean I'm sick and tired of moving.
0:27:34 > 0:27:36- Yeah, of course. - Like, I'm sick and tired of moving.
0:27:55 > 0:27:58I would hate to be moving out in this area.
0:27:58 > 0:28:00Obviously, it's tough
0:28:00 > 0:28:03and there's a lot of things that I probably can't relate to,
0:28:03 > 0:28:07- so I'm not going to pretend to know the struggle the way you do.- Yeah.
0:28:07 > 0:28:11But don't let the emotion and the difficulties cloud your judgement.
0:28:11 > 0:28:17You've got to be strategic. Step one, you've gotta fix up your home.
0:28:17 > 0:28:21You've gotta make sure you're on top of your college work. You'll be OK.
0:28:21 > 0:28:25- Let's get some food.- All right. HE LAUGHS
0:28:25 > 0:28:29'It was nice having the support, like someone that doesn't know me
0:28:29 > 0:28:32'to, like, carry my bags for me. It was nice of him.'
0:28:32 > 0:28:36It makes you feel like I'm not alone and he come out the other end,
0:28:36 > 0:28:38and he's been through the care experience,
0:28:38 > 0:28:41so I'm hoping to come out the other end.
0:28:41 > 0:28:43SHE LAUGHS One day!
0:28:43 > 0:28:45She just had to move into this home today.
0:28:45 > 0:28:49She's 18, she's a young girl, you know, in the middle of London.
0:28:49 > 0:28:52Um, I hope she's safe and makes the right choices.
0:28:59 > 0:29:02Someone who helped me make the right choices when I was younger
0:29:02 > 0:29:05was my key worker, a man called Lyndon,
0:29:05 > 0:29:08who refused to give up on me.
0:29:09 > 0:29:13'Over the years, I have lost all contact with Lyndon,
0:29:13 > 0:29:15'but I've managed to track him down.'
0:29:16 > 0:29:18DOORBELL RINGS
0:29:19 > 0:29:24- Lyndon!- Hey!- How's it going, man? Nice to see you.- You too!- Good.
0:29:24 > 0:29:29'Lyndon has worked in care for 22 years and is now a social worker.'
0:29:29 > 0:29:33- I'm fine, thank you, I'm fine. - It's so good to see you.- Yeah! Come in, man, come in.- Sure.
0:29:33 > 0:29:38- Come in.- It's my first time being in your house.- Yes, I know, I know.
0:29:38 > 0:29:41From your experience, do you find that
0:29:41 > 0:29:45the kids who have been to school are more likely to have a better future?
0:29:45 > 0:29:47- Yes.- Really?- Yes, yes.
0:29:47 > 0:29:49Because those who have gone to school
0:29:49 > 0:29:51are going to school because they want to,
0:29:51 > 0:29:55- and they value education. They have a goal, you know?- Yeah, yeah.
0:29:55 > 0:29:58So yes, they will succeed.
0:29:58 > 0:30:01Do you know what any of the other guys are doing now?
0:30:01 > 0:30:05Unfortunately, two died, um...
0:30:05 > 0:30:09- And one...- How did they die?- One was stabbed in North London...- Mm-hm.
0:30:09 > 0:30:11..and, um, the other one,
0:30:11 > 0:30:14he died because they were going to deport him.
0:30:15 > 0:30:18- They were going to deport him, so he died?- Mm-hm.
0:30:18 > 0:30:21Well, he took his own life, which was really sad.
0:30:23 > 0:30:25You know, very sad.
0:30:25 > 0:30:29And then, there was the, er...another youngster
0:30:29 > 0:30:32who's doing, um, life in prison now.
0:30:32 > 0:30:35Um, shooting somebody, you know.
0:30:35 > 0:30:40And, um, like yourself, he was... he was very bright as well.
0:30:40 > 0:30:44I liked that boy quite a lot, you know,
0:30:44 > 0:30:48and I couldn't see him being, um...being a gangster.
0:30:49 > 0:30:55Um, I guess the key thing I need to tell you is that, you know,
0:30:55 > 0:31:00your role in my life was so invaluable and I'm totally grateful for...
0:31:00 > 0:31:02Like you probably don't realise how much you've helped me.
0:31:02 > 0:31:05You've been amazing, Lyndon, amazing.
0:31:05 > 0:31:11And just to get out of bed, go to school, that's why I'm here now,
0:31:11 > 0:31:14that's why I managed to, you know, go to uni,
0:31:14 > 0:31:20because you gave me that foundation of school and education and, um...
0:31:20 > 0:31:22- Yeah, you were fantastic.- Cheers.
0:31:22 > 0:31:27You have, um, triumphed in the face of adversity, I must say that.
0:31:27 > 0:31:31You have indeed. And it's amazing.
0:31:31 > 0:31:34I feel honoured, actually, I feel honoured. Come on, give us a hug.
0:31:34 > 0:31:35- I feel honoured.- Thank you.
0:31:35 > 0:31:40- To think of me so...so much. - Definitely.- I'm glad I played a pivotal part in your life.
0:31:40 > 0:31:44- Keep on doing the good work, you know.- I will, I will, thank you.
0:31:44 > 0:31:47- Thanks.- OK, mate, yes, yes. So good seeing you.
0:31:52 > 0:31:55'Fostering is normally a temporary arrangement,
0:31:55 > 0:32:00'a short-term solution that can stop or change at any time.
0:32:01 > 0:32:07'I'm visiting a foster family attempting to make their situation more stable and permanent.
0:32:09 > 0:32:14'13-year-old Vicky has lived with Pat and Jason for the last four years,
0:32:14 > 0:32:16'and they're hoping it can last much longer.
0:32:19 > 0:32:22'Vicky was taken into care due to neglect,
0:32:22 > 0:32:26'the most common reason for kids to be taken from their parents.'
0:32:26 > 0:32:28What was it like getting new parents?
0:32:28 > 0:32:31- You feel really lucky after a while, because...- Yeah.
0:32:31 > 0:32:36..if I was still at home, there could've been some problems that couldn't have been solved.
0:32:36 > 0:32:39- Yeah.- And now, all of my worries get solved really quickly.
0:32:39 > 0:32:41- That's amazing. - And there's nothing I worry about.
0:32:41 > 0:32:44- Aw, that's so good. - Yeah.- That's so good.
0:32:44 > 0:32:46I'm so happy for you, Vicky, seriously.
0:32:46 > 0:32:50- I only worry about first days of school and like...- Normal things.
0:32:50 > 0:32:52Yeah, normal things. I don't think...
0:32:52 > 0:32:55- I'm the same as every other child.- Yeah.
0:32:55 > 0:32:59- I'm just, obviously, not with my real mum and dad. - Yeah.- That's fine with me.
0:32:59 > 0:33:01Could you imagine life without them?
0:33:01 > 0:33:03Not now, no.
0:33:03 > 0:33:06But they've brought me up really like...
0:33:06 > 0:33:10When I first came, I just didn't want to communicate with them
0:33:10 > 0:33:13and I just didn't want to be there, because I was too scared,
0:33:13 > 0:33:16if I was to do something wrong, I'm gone, but they said that, um,
0:33:16 > 0:33:17I'm obviously doing the right thing
0:33:17 > 0:33:21- and I'm being brave sort of thing. - That's so cool.- It's good, yeah.
0:33:22 > 0:33:27'Vicky's lucky to have been placed with such devoted foster parents.'
0:33:27 > 0:33:29People say about doing it just for the money, but you couldn't,
0:33:29 > 0:33:34because, um, you couldn't have someone 24/7 for four years
0:33:34 > 0:33:36and not get on with them and not want them to live with you
0:33:36 > 0:33:39for all the money in the world, cos it would drive you up...
0:33:39 > 0:33:43So you do actually open your heart up and, you know,
0:33:43 > 0:33:45- you doors are open all the time and...- Yeah.
0:33:45 > 0:33:49..you just really get into it, like they are your own child, really.
0:33:49 > 0:33:52'When I look at Pat and I look at Jason,'
0:33:52 > 0:33:56this is what I've wanted, you know.
0:33:56 > 0:33:58I've just wanted a family.
0:33:58 > 0:34:02I just wanted, you know, a home to call my own.
0:34:03 > 0:34:07'As foster kids can be moved any time, Pat and Jason have applied
0:34:07 > 0:34:09'to become Vicky's permanent foster parents.
0:34:09 > 0:34:13'An arrangement that means she could stay with them well into adulthood.
0:34:15 > 0:34:19'It's a decision that can only be made by her local authority
0:34:19 > 0:34:23'and, in two weeks time, they'll meet to decide Vicky's future.'
0:34:23 > 0:34:26I would really love to live here until I'm an adult,
0:34:26 > 0:34:29because it would make, like, me happy,
0:34:29 > 0:34:34because now I've got used to them, they're like there for me.
0:34:34 > 0:34:36I don't need anyone else any more.
0:34:47 > 0:34:50'Vicky has a real chance of long-term happiness.
0:34:51 > 0:34:54'But having a say in who you live with is rare in care.
0:34:56 > 0:34:59'Not all my foster placements were happy ones.
0:34:59 > 0:35:01'At one point, I was placed with a family
0:35:01 > 0:35:03'where I didn't always feel wanted.
0:35:03 > 0:35:06'And I know that, when a child feels rejected,
0:35:06 > 0:35:08'that's when the problems start.'
0:35:08 > 0:35:12Being back in this neighbourhood reminds me of a time
0:35:12 > 0:35:16where I wasn't, you know, fully myself, fully happy.
0:35:16 > 0:35:21I guess walking under a shadow of rejection, walking under this,
0:35:21 > 0:35:25you know, shadow of alienation and not feeling accepted.
0:35:25 > 0:35:28I certainly experienced that a lot here
0:35:28 > 0:35:31and I know many foster children can relate to that.
0:35:31 > 0:35:34I remember I had three friends from the area
0:35:34 > 0:35:40who I actually began to do shoplifting with one summer and, um,
0:35:40 > 0:35:43I can certainly see how bad foster homes lead to bad behaviour
0:35:43 > 0:35:46and it can also lead you into the justice system.
0:35:54 > 0:35:58'Aged 13, I found the one thing that probably kept me from crime
0:35:58 > 0:36:01'and offered me some stability.'
0:36:01 > 0:36:05I went to go shopping on a Friday evening
0:36:05 > 0:36:10and I saw a guy getting a piggyback with his dad
0:36:10 > 0:36:13and, um, that just, like, it really hurt me,
0:36:13 > 0:36:16like, seeing that and knowing that I didn't have that.
0:36:18 > 0:36:23'I went home and I prayed, you know, to Jesus that he would be my dad
0:36:23 > 0:36:27'and, because I saw so many examples of failed foster lives,
0:36:27 > 0:36:31'I prayed that he would raise me in a way whereby I wouldn't be
0:36:31 > 0:36:36'that foster kid who went to prison and didn't have a good education.
0:36:36 > 0:36:39'And I think that's why I'm where I am, because...
0:36:39 > 0:36:42'God has been my father, you know.'
0:36:42 > 0:36:45Obviously, some people think, "This guy's nuts!"
0:36:45 > 0:36:49But I'm totally rational, but I just believe that people need hope.
0:36:49 > 0:36:50I believe that people need belief
0:36:50 > 0:36:54and it's more than statistics and bureaucratic help,
0:36:54 > 0:36:58it's more than money that's going to improve the lives of foster kids.
0:36:58 > 0:37:00It's people that believe in them
0:37:00 > 0:37:02and really feel that they have a purpose and a potential.
0:37:04 > 0:37:08'Many foster kids live under this shadow that they're a mistake
0:37:08 > 0:37:11'and, when they feel like they're the mistake,
0:37:11 > 0:37:13'they feel like they don't have purpose.
0:37:13 > 0:37:16'They feel like they can't function like normal people.'
0:37:16 > 0:37:18You know, I don't believe that.
0:37:18 > 0:37:23I don't live with those shadows no more, so I thank God for that.
0:37:34 > 0:37:38It's now two weeks since Sarah had to move hostels
0:37:38 > 0:37:41and I've been worried that yet another upheaval
0:37:41 > 0:37:44may have hit her confidence in herself and her education.
0:37:44 > 0:37:49- Hey, how's it going?- Hi. - So this is your new room?- Yeah.
0:37:49 > 0:37:52This is the hostel. This is nice.
0:37:52 > 0:37:54This is nice. So you've got all your posters up?
0:37:54 > 0:37:58How's it going in the new hostel?
0:37:58 > 0:38:02- Um, overall, everything's all right.- Yeah.- Like...
0:38:02 > 0:38:04But I'm still going to complain about the size of it.
0:38:04 > 0:38:07- What's wrong with the size? - It's really small.
0:38:07 > 0:38:10- Is it really small?- Yeah. I feel like I'm in a box.- Do you?
0:38:10 > 0:38:13- So does it feel like home?- No.
0:38:13 > 0:38:15- I just come here to sleep, really.- Yeah.
0:38:15 > 0:38:18Like I'm always out and about doing stuff.
0:38:18 > 0:38:21You know, a few weeks ago, you was in college
0:38:21 > 0:38:23and, you know, you was doing really well.
0:38:23 > 0:38:26Now you've moved into the hostel, are you still studying?
0:38:26 > 0:38:30- Yeah, I still go to college.- Yeah. - Like my attendance has even improved.
0:38:30 > 0:38:32- It's improved?- Yeah.- Wow.
0:38:32 > 0:38:37I know that moving into, um, a hostel can be quite traumatic
0:38:37 > 0:38:41and it can disrupt everything. How has it affected your life?
0:38:41 > 0:38:45It hasn't really affected me this time,
0:38:45 > 0:38:47- cos like, I was more prepared.- Hmm.
0:38:47 > 0:38:50Like I'm not saying I thought, "Oh, yeah, everything's cool."
0:38:50 > 0:38:54No, it was hard, like, settling in, but I had help from my friend.
0:38:54 > 0:38:57One thing that I'll say to people, like you can't change your past,
0:38:57 > 0:39:01but you can change your future. And, you know, at the end of the day,
0:39:01 > 0:39:04what happened has happened and you just try and move on from it.
0:39:04 > 0:39:06I don't want to be in the system no more.
0:39:06 > 0:39:08I don't want to be in, like, the care system.
0:39:08 > 0:39:10I don't want to be in no benefit system.
0:39:10 > 0:39:13I don't want to be in, like, no system.
0:39:13 > 0:39:17- I just want to, like, do me. - And how will you do you?
0:39:17 > 0:39:21Obviously, if I have a good education, then I can obviously get a good job.
0:39:21 > 0:39:24- Yeah.- And, obviously, with a good job comes money.
0:39:24 > 0:39:27- Yeah.- So I won't be in the system any longer.
0:39:28 > 0:39:30Sarah, I just want to wish you the best of luck
0:39:30 > 0:39:34and thank you so much for allowing me to come into your life
0:39:34 > 0:39:36and to intrude, you know.
0:39:36 > 0:39:39It's such a pleasure and I've learned so much from you
0:39:39 > 0:39:41and, you know, I'm sure you're going to be OK.
0:39:46 > 0:39:48For the first time since I met Sarah,
0:39:48 > 0:39:51she sounds positive about her future,
0:39:51 > 0:39:53like she's finally in control of her life.
0:39:54 > 0:39:58Something I realised from a young age is that
0:39:58 > 0:40:01you're responsible for your future and for your happiness.
0:40:01 > 0:40:04And whilst you have a lack in relationships and, you know,
0:40:04 > 0:40:06the perfect sort of environment,
0:40:06 > 0:40:10you can pull your socks up, you can move forward, you can say, you know,
0:40:10 > 0:40:12"I'm going to make tomorrow better."
0:40:22 > 0:40:26'Two weeks after first meeting Vicky,
0:40:26 > 0:40:30'I'm here to see her again on a day that's crucial to her future.
0:40:32 > 0:40:36'Today she'll find out whether she's going to be allowed to spend
0:40:36 > 0:40:40'the rest of her childhood with her foster parents Pat and Jason.'
0:40:53 > 0:40:56Hi, this is Vicky and Pat and Jason, everybody, and Ashley.
0:40:56 > 0:41:00Come on in, Vicky. If you want to sit there by the bottle, OK?
0:41:00 > 0:41:03We'll put Pat on one side, Jason on the other.
0:41:03 > 0:41:06Ashley, if you wouldn't mind sitting there.
0:41:06 > 0:41:09OK? Thank you. And welcome to panel.
0:41:13 > 0:41:16The reason we're here, I think you know.
0:41:16 > 0:41:21We are being asked to make a recommendation to the council about
0:41:21 > 0:41:26whether you can stay, for the rest of your growing-up, with Pat and Jason.
0:41:26 > 0:41:28Do you want to stay?
0:41:28 > 0:41:33- Yes.- Yes? Absolutely. - Yes.- Till you're 18?- Yes.
0:41:33 > 0:41:38- 23? 27?- Don't think we're getting rid of her till she's about 40!
0:41:38 > 0:41:39LAUGHTER
0:41:39 > 0:41:42At this point, do you feel like part of the family? You do.
0:41:42 > 0:41:46- So you want to be with them till you've grown up?- Yes.- Yeah.
0:41:46 > 0:41:48We're going to ask Pat and Jason some questions now, OK?
0:41:48 > 0:41:50So are you going to go and wait outside?
0:41:50 > 0:41:53Christine will come with you and Ashley as well, all right?
0:41:53 > 0:41:57- OK.- See you in a little while. - See you in a little while.
0:41:57 > 0:41:59- You're only in the room next door. - Yes. Thank you.
0:42:04 > 0:42:05Why does this matter?
0:42:07 > 0:42:10Because then I'll feel more like their child, sort of thing.
0:42:10 > 0:42:13Cos I don't like the name foster child, sort of thing.
0:42:13 > 0:42:18- It annoys me.- Hmm.- When people find out, it's like "foster child".- Yeah.
0:42:18 > 0:42:19I don't like that.
0:42:21 > 0:42:23I'd rather be called their child, sort of thing.
0:42:23 > 0:42:27- I know I'm not theirs but...sort of. - Well, I guess you will be.
0:42:27 > 0:42:30When I came down to visit you,
0:42:30 > 0:42:33um...it was really clear that you were a part of the family.
0:42:33 > 0:42:40So I guess this...this will clearly just confirm, hopefully,
0:42:40 > 0:42:42what's already true.
0:42:42 > 0:42:43It'll be an injustice
0:42:43 > 0:42:47if Vicky wasn't able to live with this family, you know?
0:42:47 > 0:42:49I really hope they make the right decision.
0:42:49 > 0:42:51I really hope they make the right decision.
0:42:51 > 0:42:56- I've got butterflies now. - You've got butterflies?- Yeah.
0:42:56 > 0:43:01- How about you guys?- Um...a little bit. A little bit nervous.- Really?
0:43:04 > 0:43:05- Hiya!- Hiya.- Hi.
0:43:07 > 0:43:09Sorry you had to wait a little while
0:43:09 > 0:43:11but panel had a bit of chatting to do
0:43:11 > 0:43:14because we just wanted to be sure
0:43:14 > 0:43:17that we were thinking everything through properly.
0:43:17 > 0:43:21And we were wanting to make sure that this recommendation
0:43:21 > 0:43:24is a recommendation that will last until you are grown up.
0:43:24 > 0:43:29So you can't move around any more - that you're stuck with them.
0:43:29 > 0:43:33- Um-hm? And...what do you want us to have said?- Yes.
0:43:33 > 0:43:37Well, you'll be glad to know that actually the panel have recommended.
0:43:37 > 0:43:38- Woo!- Yay!
0:43:38 > 0:43:39ASHLEY APPLAUDS
0:43:39 > 0:43:42So you can stay. You can give her a hug, you know!
0:43:44 > 0:43:45Yeah!
0:43:47 > 0:43:50- Well done.- Good girl.- That's it!
0:43:50 > 0:43:52You can stay with Pat and Jason
0:43:52 > 0:43:57and you can stay with them until it's time to move on as an adult.
0:43:57 > 0:43:58OK? Well done.
0:43:58 > 0:44:02It was much easier today because we knew what you wanted. Yeah?
0:44:02 > 0:44:05It's much, much easier. Yes?
0:44:07 > 0:44:11- Vicky, how are you feeling? - Really happy.
0:44:11 > 0:44:14I'm so excited for your future.
0:44:14 > 0:44:16I'm genuinely proud and I believe in you guys
0:44:16 > 0:44:19and I look forward to the future. You guys are going to be great.
0:44:19 > 0:44:22Huddle! Well done, guys.
0:44:22 > 0:44:24Right. Well, Ashley, it's been lovely meeting you.
0:44:24 > 0:44:27- It's been such a pleasure. - We're off now to celebrate.
0:44:27 > 0:44:31- Oh, guys, I'm so happy. So happy. - See you again soon.- Yes, congrats.
0:44:35 > 0:44:38'Nothing is more satisfying than seeing what just happened there.'
0:44:40 > 0:44:44It makes me excited about the future of fostering and it can work.
0:44:44 > 0:44:46It can be successful, you know?
0:44:46 > 0:44:49It can make a positive difference.
0:44:57 > 0:45:00'The system has worked for Vicky
0:45:00 > 0:45:03'and this will hopefully be the end of her journey through care.
0:45:03 > 0:45:07'But not everyone escapes the care system so easily.
0:45:07 > 0:45:09'And often history repeats itself.'
0:45:10 > 0:45:14Many kids who grow up in care, who have children,
0:45:14 > 0:45:16see their kids end up in care.
0:45:16 > 0:45:20And it makes me think, why is that so?
0:45:20 > 0:45:24It's clear that the system is not effective
0:45:24 > 0:45:26in creating a new standard of living
0:45:26 > 0:45:29and...making people more mobile
0:45:29 > 0:45:32and allowing them to kind of move away from their past.
0:45:32 > 0:45:33It seems they go full circle
0:45:33 > 0:45:37and the kids they have end up in the same predicament as them.
0:45:41 > 0:45:45'17-year-old Leanne was in care when her own baby was born.
0:45:45 > 0:45:48'She needs all the support she can get
0:45:48 > 0:45:52'to make sure that vicious cycle doesn't continue.
0:45:52 > 0:45:56'So she and daughter Ruby have been put in a mother-and-baby unit
0:45:56 > 0:46:00'to try and keep them together and give them the best start in life.'
0:46:02 > 0:46:03She's smiling at me.
0:46:06 > 0:46:10- Hello!- Hi!
0:46:10 > 0:46:12Do you want to feed her?
0:46:12 > 0:46:14'Leanne's own mother regularly visits
0:46:14 > 0:46:17'and after three years living apart, they're now rebuilding
0:46:17 > 0:46:21'the relationship that broke down when Leanne became a teenager.'
0:46:21 > 0:46:23Hello, my beautiful! Hey?
0:46:23 > 0:46:27- Hey?!- What was the climax when you want into care?
0:46:27 > 0:46:31- Was it a fight or...?- No, it was me.
0:46:31 > 0:46:35I just lost...lost it in a meeting with social services
0:46:35 > 0:46:39- and I just said, "Take over. I can't have her home any more."- Yes.
0:46:39 > 0:46:41I didn't know where she was
0:46:41 > 0:46:44and this was weekend after weekend after weekend.
0:46:46 > 0:46:51You know, she was bunking off school, um...you know.
0:46:51 > 0:46:53I just went to the end of my tether and I said,
0:46:53 > 0:46:57"No, please take over now. I'm not having her home. End of."
0:46:57 > 0:46:59That's a pretty brave decision.
0:46:59 > 0:47:02It was the hardest decision I've ever made in my life.
0:47:02 > 0:47:06Now, in hindsight, it was the best thing I did for her.
0:47:06 > 0:47:09It's actually helped me. Made me a better person, you know.
0:47:09 > 0:47:12I think being away from my mum done me good cos we get along better
0:47:12 > 0:47:14when we're not living under the same roof.
0:47:14 > 0:47:18And that's when I started feeling, you know, foster care is not bad
0:47:18 > 0:47:21and, to be honest, I looked at them like my mum and dad.
0:47:21 > 0:47:24They had another kid living there, like, their own kid.
0:47:24 > 0:47:27And the way I saw them with their daughter,
0:47:27 > 0:47:29because she had a baby and all,
0:47:29 > 0:47:33I just thought, you know, "Why can't me and my mum be like that?
0:47:33 > 0:47:35"Why has stuff got to ruin it for us?"
0:47:35 > 0:47:39We were good friends. It died. But we're getting it back.
0:47:42 > 0:47:44Just believe and trust.
0:47:46 > 0:47:47Hmm?
0:47:47 > 0:47:49I want her to have a lot better.
0:47:49 > 0:47:52I've sort of erased that part of my life now.
0:47:52 > 0:47:54I'm looking at the future and that's her there, you know?
0:47:54 > 0:47:58- She's my little angel and I wouldn't change her for the world.- Yes.
0:47:58 > 0:48:00I'm not going to wish she wasn't here
0:48:00 > 0:48:02but I wish I'd waited and got a job behind me
0:48:02 > 0:48:06and had my own place and not been a benefit mum.
0:48:06 > 0:48:09- I've got a perfect little daughter. - She's beautiful.
0:48:09 > 0:48:11You know, she's been the making of me
0:48:11 > 0:48:13and I'm never, ever going to let her witness
0:48:13 > 0:48:14anything that I've been through.
0:48:14 > 0:48:18- Yeah...- Yeah, I'm not. I know.
0:48:18 > 0:48:20She wants to have her say now.
0:48:20 > 0:48:23'Leanne and her mum clearly love this child.'
0:48:25 > 0:48:27I think she's got two mothers.
0:48:27 > 0:48:30Um...and that just gives me confidence
0:48:30 > 0:48:33to know that Ruby's going to be OK.
0:48:35 > 0:48:37Sorry, boobs.
0:48:39 > 0:48:42Your daughter's changed your life.
0:48:42 > 0:48:45And literally who you are.
0:48:46 > 0:48:49There's a lot to be proud of.
0:48:49 > 0:48:52'Seeing Leanne with her mum has made me wonder about my own mum.
0:48:53 > 0:48:56'She didn't receive the support she needed.
0:48:56 > 0:49:00'If she had, maybe things would have been different.
0:49:02 > 0:49:08'I've discovered that, like Leanne, she had me when she was just 17
0:49:08 > 0:49:11'and had previously spent her childhood in care.'
0:49:12 > 0:49:14Do you know what? I never blamed my mum.
0:49:14 > 0:49:18And I say that genuinely, and I always had an understanding
0:49:18 > 0:49:20that she didn't have it easy.
0:49:20 > 0:49:23Cissy, my foster mum, my first foster mum,
0:49:23 > 0:49:27always explained to me that you need to love your mum.
0:49:27 > 0:49:29You need to honour your mum.
0:49:29 > 0:49:32You know, as a foster child, you have to be able to forgive,
0:49:32 > 0:49:34and I kind of had that mentality
0:49:34 > 0:49:37that there's no point, like, hating her.
0:49:46 > 0:49:49Over the years, we've been trying to rebuild our relationship.
0:49:51 > 0:49:55It's Mother's Day, and also my biological mum's birthday.
0:49:55 > 0:49:58I'm travelling to Manchester where she's finally settled
0:49:58 > 0:50:00and started a new family.
0:50:01 > 0:50:05Ruby, how's it going? Are you all right?
0:50:05 > 0:50:07What has he got?
0:50:07 > 0:50:09Ashley, I'm going skating!
0:50:09 > 0:50:12- How's it going, Mum? - Are you all right?
0:50:12 > 0:50:14How's it going, Mike?
0:50:14 > 0:50:17- Happy birthday.- Thank you. - How are you, Rosie?
0:50:17 > 0:50:20- I'm going skating!- Yeah.
0:50:20 > 0:50:23- Let's go in.- Come on, let's go in and get a brew.- It's freezing.
0:50:23 > 0:50:27'I finally feel ready to ask some difficult questions.'
0:50:30 > 0:50:34- Why did you go into care? If you want to talk about it?- Yeah.
0:50:34 > 0:50:39We were quite neglected. Probably from about the age of four
0:50:39 > 0:50:42I'd been on an "at risk" register with social services,
0:50:42 > 0:50:44so I don't really understand
0:50:44 > 0:50:47why we hadn't been taken into care before then.
0:50:47 > 0:50:51We just used to wander the streets, not really fed properly.
0:50:51 > 0:50:54How we did eventually get taken into care,
0:50:54 > 0:50:56my mum was mixing with these two girls
0:50:56 > 0:50:59that were known as local prostitutes
0:50:59 > 0:51:04and one night they were all in our flat, the two girls and my mum.
0:51:04 > 0:51:06My mum every night used to get ready to go to the pub.
0:51:06 > 0:51:09She was putting on her make-up and they were all drinking vodka,
0:51:09 > 0:51:14so they thought it would be funny to see if I drunk the vodka...
0:51:14 > 0:51:17- How old were you?- I was about seven.
0:51:17 > 0:51:20I didn't want to drink the vodka, so what they started doing was...
0:51:20 > 0:51:22My mum was just laughing at it,
0:51:22 > 0:51:26because I think she must have been drunk, but they were slapping my hand
0:51:26 > 0:51:28and going, "You've got to drink it."
0:51:28 > 0:51:32My mum just went out and left me with these girls
0:51:32 > 0:51:35and the girls then began to get worried
0:51:35 > 0:51:38cos obviously I was in quite a bad state
0:51:38 > 0:51:40and rather than take some action,
0:51:40 > 0:51:43they just left me on the pavement outside these flats.
0:51:43 > 0:51:46The neglect my mum suffered from her parents,
0:51:46 > 0:51:49years of being shunted around the care system
0:51:49 > 0:51:54and then in a violent relationship meant that when I was a baby,
0:51:54 > 0:51:57she was totally unprepared and unable to look after me.
0:51:57 > 0:52:01The saddest truth is that when you grow up in care,
0:52:01 > 0:52:05you're twice as likely to have your own children taken into care.
0:52:05 > 0:52:07There's the guilt, isn't there?
0:52:07 > 0:52:10I was this rubbish failed mum. I didn't protect you,
0:52:10 > 0:52:13so not only did I have the past to beat myself up about,
0:52:13 > 0:52:16it's just another thing
0:52:16 > 0:52:18and I suppose I felt I wasn't good enough to be your mum.
0:52:18 > 0:52:21There's those sorts of feelings attached to it.
0:52:21 > 0:52:23The day you were born, to be honest,
0:52:23 > 0:52:28I knew I was in a really rubbish situation and I prayed to God
0:52:28 > 0:52:31that you wouldn't get taken into care because I think...
0:52:31 > 0:52:34SHE STARTS TO SOB I think, in my head,
0:52:34 > 0:52:37I knew that I was in a bad situation...
0:52:37 > 0:52:39That...
0:52:40 > 0:52:43- Sorry.- It's cool. It's cool.
0:52:45 > 0:52:47But I always remember that.
0:52:48 > 0:52:53I mean, when I look back now I just think, like, that wasn't even me.
0:52:53 > 0:52:57It's mad to think that I went through all that,
0:52:57 > 0:53:00so it's nice that people can understand
0:53:00 > 0:53:03and understand why I was a messed-up person,
0:53:03 > 0:53:07but I'm also proud of myself today,
0:53:07 > 0:53:09to work and come through that, and...
0:53:09 > 0:53:12- I'm proud, too.- Thank you, baby. - Really proud.
0:53:12 > 0:53:15You've really earned your stripes, do you know what I'm saying?
0:53:15 > 0:53:18To be where you are today. And that is commendable, man.
0:53:18 > 0:53:21- You deserve a... - I'm going to cry again.
0:53:21 > 0:53:25No, but seriously, like, you're not just a...
0:53:25 > 0:53:27You're not just...
0:53:27 > 0:53:31- I think you're extraordinary. - Oh, Ash.
0:53:31 > 0:53:32Don't.
0:53:36 > 0:53:38- I always do it.- But you are.
0:53:38 > 0:53:41You are. It's the truth.
0:53:42 > 0:53:45'It's been tough, obviously.
0:53:45 > 0:53:47'You're reminded of the journey.'
0:53:47 > 0:53:50I'm obviously reminded of my journey,
0:53:50 > 0:53:52but also my mum's journey
0:53:52 > 0:53:56and just seeing how much of a remarkable woman my mum is
0:53:56 > 0:54:00because most people who go through half of what my mum goes through
0:54:00 > 0:54:05end up mentally ill in some recovery institution,
0:54:05 > 0:54:08dead, in prison, and my mum's gone through so much
0:54:08 > 0:54:13and she's here and she's doing really well.
0:54:13 > 0:54:16You know, my mum not having a good parent
0:54:16 > 0:54:21meant that it took her so much longer to learn the essential skills
0:54:21 > 0:54:23for good living and for good parenthood.
0:54:30 > 0:54:34Oh, my days. Oh!
0:54:34 > 0:54:37- They are cute, aren't they? - Oh, my days!
0:54:37 > 0:54:38That's my favourite photo.
0:54:38 > 0:54:42I always wonder what you were thinking.
0:54:42 > 0:54:46- You were so cute, really. - Wow, look at this charmer.
0:54:46 > 0:54:49'Thankfully, my mum has broken the cycle of care
0:54:49 > 0:54:51'with my two little sisters.
0:54:51 > 0:54:54'I'm confident I have learnt from her hardships
0:54:54 > 0:54:58'and those of many other people in care
0:54:58 > 0:55:02'and when I have children, I'll be the best dad I can be.'
0:55:17 > 0:55:20# If you walk my way
0:55:20 > 0:55:23# I ain't sitting down Cos I know it's my time
0:55:23 > 0:55:27# I know it's my time
0:55:27 > 0:55:29# Oh, oh-oh
0:55:29 > 0:55:31# If you're living your life
0:55:31 > 0:55:34# Doing all you can to stand up It's time
0:55:34 > 0:55:37# You know it's your time... #
0:55:37 > 0:55:39It's obvious that when you go into care,
0:55:39 > 0:55:40you've already had a bad start.
0:55:48 > 0:55:52The biggest problem for me was moving about so much.
0:55:52 > 0:55:54I wish that I had what Vicky had.
0:55:54 > 0:55:56I wish that I could have been in a home
0:55:56 > 0:56:00that I could have called my family from, you know, two to 18.
0:56:00 > 0:56:03# ..If you walk my way
0:56:03 > 0:56:06# I ain't sitting down Cos I know it's my time
0:56:06 > 0:56:08# I know it's my time
0:56:08 > 0:56:11# Oh, oh-oh... #
0:56:11 > 0:56:14'There is a real lack of carers and foster families
0:56:14 > 0:56:16'and we need more to come forward.'
0:56:16 > 0:56:19# ..You know it's your time... #
0:56:19 > 0:56:23Knowing that whether you're seven or 17, the people that you live with,
0:56:23 > 0:56:26they're always going to be there for you.
0:56:26 > 0:56:27That's what's important.
0:56:29 > 0:56:33In the care system, the main thing should be love.
0:56:36 > 0:56:39# ..If you love life If you like life
0:56:39 > 0:56:41# Turn your head up to the sky You'll be all right
0:56:43 > 0:56:44# If you walk my way
0:56:44 > 0:56:48# I ain't sitting down Cos I know it's my time
0:56:48 > 0:56:51# I know it's my time
0:56:51 > 0:56:53# Oh, oh-oh
0:56:53 > 0:56:55# If you're living your life
0:56:55 > 0:56:58# Doing all you can to stand up It's time
0:56:58 > 0:57:00# You know it's you time. #