Jay & James

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0:00:02 > 0:00:08This programme contains some strong language

0:00:08 > 0:00:09BABY CRIES Well done, you.

0:00:09 > 0:00:11Behind every new mum...

0:00:11 > 0:00:13HE BELCHES

0:00:13 > 0:00:15..is a new dad.

0:00:15 > 0:00:17That is disgusting.

0:00:17 > 0:00:21Two thirds of new fathers feel useless during the pregnancy...

0:00:21 > 0:00:23All we're good for is just putting it in there.

0:00:23 > 0:00:26..and nearly half feel unprepared for the birth.

0:00:26 > 0:00:29Let's not think about it cos that makes it worse.

0:00:29 > 0:00:32But all that is about to change.

0:00:32 > 0:00:34SHE GROANS

0:00:34 > 0:00:36I'm not ready for this. No, seriously.

0:00:36 > 0:00:39Under the watchful eye of experienced midwives...

0:00:39 > 0:00:43- This is harder than it looks.- Think it's easy for her having a baby?

0:00:43 > 0:00:46..these first-time fathers are going on a crash course.

0:00:46 > 0:00:49Get this baby out!

0:00:49 > 0:00:51They'll be stretched to their limits...

0:00:51 > 0:00:54It's really uncomfy. In fact, it's very painful.

0:00:54 > 0:00:57..to try to become the perfect birthing partner.

0:00:57 > 0:00:59Better go, she's calling me.

0:00:59 > 0:01:00There you are.

0:01:00 > 0:01:02With each other for moral support...

0:01:02 > 0:01:04- God.- That's scarred me for life.

0:01:04 > 0:01:08..they'll get closer to the delivery action than they'd ever imagined.

0:01:08 > 0:01:10Spread 'em.

0:01:10 > 0:01:12But when push comes to shove...

0:01:12 > 0:01:15I'm here, I'm here, I'm here.

0:01:15 > 0:01:17..will these dads deliver?

0:01:17 > 0:01:18I'm...shitting myself.

0:01:23 > 0:01:26Tonight, two unsympathetic dads-to-be

0:01:26 > 0:01:29in urgent need of the midwife's help.

0:01:33 > 0:01:36Doorman and former cage fighter Jay from Stockport

0:01:36 > 0:01:38got together with barmaid Hazel

0:01:38 > 0:01:41after she noticed his sizeable assets.

0:01:43 > 0:01:49I must admit I was attracted to Jay cos of his doorman appearance.

0:01:49 > 0:01:51All right, mate, you all right?

0:01:51 > 0:01:53Jay has moved her to the front of the queue

0:01:53 > 0:01:57and now, at seven months pregnant, she's in the club.

0:01:57 > 0:02:00But this hard man's got a weak spot -

0:02:00 > 0:02:02he's a wimp when it comes to hospitals

0:02:02 > 0:02:05and runs a mile at the sight of blood.

0:02:05 > 0:02:08Yeah, I'm squeamish.

0:02:08 > 0:02:09Don't like blood.

0:02:09 > 0:02:11I don't like the smell of hospitals.

0:02:11 > 0:02:14I don't like any form of medical procedure.

0:02:14 > 0:02:19He'll go deathly white and all the colour will drain out of his lips.

0:02:19 > 0:02:22I'm worried about how I'm going to be on birth day.

0:02:22 > 0:02:26Jay's phobia is so bad, Hazel's thinking about replacing him

0:02:26 > 0:02:31as her birthing partner and she's got an eager substitute.

0:02:31 > 0:02:35The unexpected happens and Jay panics, he'd better watch out

0:02:35 > 0:02:39because I'll be there to step in and take over.

0:02:39 > 0:02:42I've got to get over this fear of blood and guts.

0:02:42 > 0:02:44I can't have Hazel's mum in there.

0:02:44 > 0:02:46Come here!

0:02:46 > 0:02:49Jay may be desperate to get his ringside seat at the birth,

0:02:49 > 0:02:53but so far he's given Hazel little sympathy.

0:02:53 > 0:02:54He did actually say,

0:02:54 > 0:02:59"Pregnancy is not an illness, it's just a condition,

0:02:59 > 0:03:01"so you can do all the normal things."

0:03:04 > 0:03:09I think some people might question, even at 20 weeks pregnant,

0:03:09 > 0:03:11I shouldn't be doing certain jobs.

0:03:11 > 0:03:15Yeah, but I've never had you, like, jacking the car up

0:03:15 > 0:03:18or anything like that, like, real heavy lifting.

0:03:18 > 0:03:20Hm, you've had me in the loft.

0:03:20 > 0:03:22Yeah, but you get in the loft easier than me.

0:03:22 > 0:03:24There we go.

0:03:24 > 0:03:25No.

0:03:25 > 0:03:27With just six weeks to go,

0:03:27 > 0:03:31can the midwives give Jay a fighting chance of making it to the birth?

0:03:31 > 0:03:37Jay needs to learn a little bit more, I think, to be more prepared.

0:03:37 > 0:03:41I'll second that, I agree. Help.

0:03:43 > 0:03:45A hundred miles away in Peterborough,

0:03:45 > 0:03:48another dad-to-be in need of the midwife's attention.

0:03:48 > 0:03:52See what I have to wake up to every morning?

0:03:52 > 0:03:5521-year-old serial jester James

0:03:55 > 0:03:58got together with Amber two years ago

0:03:58 > 0:04:01and she's been the butt of his jokes ever since.

0:04:01 > 0:04:05I wind her up until it gets to the point where she wants to beat me.

0:04:05 > 0:04:07I would love to push you into the...

0:04:07 > 0:04:12My nickname's Digger and it's because when people should shut up

0:04:12 > 0:04:13I continue that extra bit.

0:04:13 > 0:04:16You absolute troll.

0:04:16 > 0:04:19I don't have a filter. It just doesn't stop, it's just like...

0:04:19 > 0:04:22But now Amber's seven months pregnant,

0:04:22 > 0:04:25Digger's dug himself a massive hole.

0:04:25 > 0:04:29You should enlighten them on the beautiful names you call me.

0:04:29 > 0:04:32I don't call you anything.

0:04:32 > 0:04:36"Tubsy" and "Here comes Fatty".

0:04:36 > 0:04:38- You can call me a pig all day, it's fine.- I didn't call you a pig.

0:04:38 > 0:04:40Yes, you did!

0:04:40 > 0:04:44My fear in labour is that he's just going to stand there

0:04:44 > 0:04:46taking the mick out of me the whole time.

0:04:46 > 0:04:51I jokingly compare labour to being kicked in the nuts.

0:04:51 > 0:04:55Yes, it's painful but so is backache.

0:04:55 > 0:04:57I know that when it comes to the delivery room,

0:04:57 > 0:05:00I know I'm going to do something completely inappropriate.

0:05:02 > 0:05:05But James' jokes are hiding a bigger problem.

0:05:05 > 0:05:09This 21-year-old dad-to-be is a flapper who panics.

0:05:09 > 0:05:12- See, you're getting agitated. - Cos you are annoying.

0:05:12 > 0:05:16- Well, it wasn't done right. - I'd like to see you do it!

0:05:16 > 0:05:18When it comes to Amber, I flap like there's no tomorrow

0:05:18 > 0:05:21and when it comes to the baby I flap even more.

0:05:21 > 0:05:23And it's no surprise that Amber's worried

0:05:23 > 0:05:27he won't be able to hold it together at the birth.

0:05:27 > 0:05:31I'd like it to be as less stressful for him, cos the calmer he is,

0:05:31 > 0:05:34the calmer I'll be cos I won't have to worry about him.

0:05:34 > 0:05:39It's time this stressed-out joker got help.

0:05:39 > 0:05:42I want James to have these private sessions with the midwife,

0:05:42 > 0:05:44but I also think he needs it.

0:05:44 > 0:05:47It's nicer to know that he knows what he's doing

0:05:47 > 0:05:49and he feels confident in doing it.

0:05:49 > 0:05:52So, one dad-to-be in danger of passing out at the birth...

0:05:52 > 0:05:55It's horrible.

0:05:55 > 0:05:58..and one who keeps putting his foot in it.

0:05:58 > 0:06:00Now, don't drop him.

0:06:00 > 0:06:02I cannot believe you just said that.

0:06:02 > 0:06:05Two daddy disasters who aren't alone.

0:06:06 > 0:06:10A new BBC Three poll found nearly half of young dads

0:06:10 > 0:06:12were unprepared for the birth.

0:06:14 > 0:06:15So we've called in the experts...

0:06:15 > 0:06:18Give me half an hour and, er, yeah, I'll come and help you.

0:06:18 > 0:06:20..who have come up with a crash course.

0:06:20 > 0:06:24This is the last chance to transform these clueless lads into super dads

0:06:24 > 0:06:29in the delivery room and they've got just six weeks.

0:06:29 > 0:06:33Taking on this huge challenge are midwives who've delivered

0:06:33 > 0:06:35hundreds of babies between them.

0:06:35 > 0:06:38At Stepping Hill Hospital in Greater Manchester,

0:06:38 > 0:06:41midwife Debs has seen it all before.

0:06:41 > 0:06:45I think the main problem with that is the fear of the unknown,

0:06:45 > 0:06:48and they feel inadequate and they want to support their women

0:06:48 > 0:06:51and they don't know what to do.

0:06:51 > 0:06:53- Wish me luck.- Have a good day.

0:06:53 > 0:06:55Now she's got a job on her hands getting bouncer Jay

0:06:55 > 0:06:59to face his phobia of blood and hospitals.

0:06:59 > 0:07:02Men feel under pressure cos they're meant to be men.

0:07:02 > 0:07:05What we're trying to do is just bring that back

0:07:05 > 0:07:08with a few little challenges, just to show him that

0:07:08 > 0:07:10he doesn't have to be fearful of things.

0:07:10 > 0:07:12Lesson one for Jay,

0:07:12 > 0:07:15who hasn't set foot in a hospital since he was three -

0:07:15 > 0:07:18can he even make it though the front door?

0:07:18 > 0:07:21Now I'm near the hospital I'm sort of, er...

0:07:21 > 0:07:24I'm conscious of the fact now that I'm going to have to go in.

0:07:24 > 0:07:27And, er, hopefully not pass out.

0:07:30 > 0:07:32Right, here we go, time to man up.

0:07:36 > 0:07:37First things first,

0:07:37 > 0:07:42Debs has got to get a handle on just how bad Jay's big fear really is.

0:07:42 > 0:07:47So, when you think about blood, what exactly are you expecting?

0:07:47 > 0:07:50I'm expecting to need to sit down.

0:07:50 > 0:07:53- Right, are you worried about fainting?- Yeah. Yeah.

0:07:53 > 0:07:54OK. Have you ever fainted?

0:07:54 > 0:07:57- I've come close... - Right, OK.- ..when giving blood.

0:07:58 > 0:08:02Jay is not alone. One in three new dads are worried they'll pass out

0:08:02 > 0:08:04at the birth.

0:08:04 > 0:08:06Brilliant, you'll be fine...

0:08:06 > 0:08:09Debs wants to see if Jay will let her take blood.

0:08:09 > 0:08:13- If you feel uncomfortable, I can take it off.- Right, OK.- Yeah?

0:08:13 > 0:08:16- You can see a lovely vein. That's a lovely one, that.- Ripe.

0:08:16 > 0:08:19It's a ripe one. Does it make you feel uncomfortable to touch it?

0:08:19 > 0:08:21Yeah, it's... I'm not overly...

0:08:21 > 0:08:23No. So if I came at you with this needle now...

0:08:23 > 0:08:25- I'd be out of that door.- OK.

0:08:25 > 0:08:27There's no blood in sight yet

0:08:27 > 0:08:30and hard man Jay is already terrified,

0:08:30 > 0:08:33but Debs has got a few tricks up her sleeve.

0:08:33 > 0:08:37Now what we're going to do is get you to take your own blood.

0:08:37 > 0:08:39- You're joking?- No. Not joking.

0:08:39 > 0:08:42Right, so what we're going to do is, you're going to press that

0:08:42 > 0:08:44- firmly against your fingertip. - Yeah.

0:08:44 > 0:08:46And you're just going to press that in.

0:08:46 > 0:08:49- You're not happy.- Not really, no.

0:08:49 > 0:08:50I'm starting to sweat now.

0:08:50 > 0:08:53Are you? Which part of it are you worrying about?

0:08:53 > 0:08:55It's just the... Don't let me think about it too much.

0:08:55 > 0:08:57- Let me just do it.- All right.

0:08:59 > 0:09:00Then you can pull it away

0:09:00 > 0:09:02and then if you just squeeze your finger.

0:09:04 > 0:09:07So, does it matter that it's your blood when you see it,

0:09:07 > 0:09:10- does it really bother you? - No, it's not great.- No.- No.

0:09:12 > 0:09:15At this rate, there's no chance Jay will cope at the birth,

0:09:15 > 0:09:18so Debs has come up with a sneaky idea to give him

0:09:18 > 0:09:21a little extra motivation.

0:09:21 > 0:09:25- Right, Jay, you can look at your homework.- Oh, Jesus.

0:09:25 > 0:09:28She got a twinkle in her eye there as well, hasn't she?

0:09:28 > 0:09:30HE LAUGHS

0:09:30 > 0:09:32You feel that you're not going to come and you're worried and

0:09:32 > 0:09:35it all becomes too much, that lady's going to take over.

0:09:35 > 0:09:37Yeah, 100%. Yeah.

0:09:37 > 0:09:39I don't know where I'm going to put her.

0:09:40 > 0:09:42He's still got a long way to go.

0:09:42 > 0:09:45I mean, he's going to have to confront his phobia about blood

0:09:45 > 0:09:47to be in the birth room,

0:09:47 > 0:09:50because his mother-in-law is waiting on the sidelines to step in

0:09:50 > 0:09:52if he fears that he's not going to be able to cope with it.

0:09:57 > 0:10:00In Peterborough, James has few concerns.

0:10:00 > 0:10:05He's about to meet his midwife and the wisecracks have already started.

0:10:05 > 0:10:07What do you think it's going to be like today,

0:10:07 > 0:10:11- seeing what you know, what you don't know?- I know everything.

0:10:11 > 0:10:13- No, you don't.- I'm a genius.

0:10:13 > 0:10:17- You don't know anything. - Baby drops. Baby crowns.

0:10:17 > 0:10:20Baby comes out. Simple process.

0:10:24 > 0:10:28Looks like midwife Susan Vining has got her work cut out,

0:10:28 > 0:10:30but at least she's got a plan.

0:10:30 > 0:10:34The sessions James is going to have will make him feel empowered,

0:10:34 > 0:10:39able to cope for himself, able to cope with Amber and actually enjoy

0:10:39 > 0:10:42the delivery so he remembers it in a positive manner.

0:10:44 > 0:10:48- Hiya.- Hi.- I'm Susan, pleased to meet you.- I'm James.- You're James.

0:10:48 > 0:10:51- Hello.- Hi, Amber. Nice to meet you. I'm Susan.- Hello.

0:10:51 > 0:10:54These sessions that we're having, what are you hoping to

0:10:54 > 0:10:56get from them, is there anything specifically?

0:10:56 > 0:10:59It would be probably quite useful to know quite a bit more than I do,

0:10:59 > 0:11:01so I don't panic and flap about.

0:11:01 > 0:11:03I think if we can show you lots of different things

0:11:03 > 0:11:06- and help you understand what happens during labour...- Yeah.

0:11:06 > 0:11:09..how Amber might be feeling, then you're going to think,

0:11:09 > 0:11:11"That's OK, the midwife said that's normal."

0:11:11 > 0:11:14Yeah? So it's not, "Whoo, what's happening?" Sort of thing.

0:11:14 > 0:11:16OK, now...

0:11:16 > 0:11:20Susan's first mission is to replace James' fears with facts.

0:11:20 > 0:11:25For her, the more James understands, the less he'll flap at the birth.

0:11:25 > 0:11:27I think it's a good thing for James,

0:11:27 > 0:11:31learning stuff. It means he won't panic.

0:11:31 > 0:11:35Hopefully, won't take the mick out of me so much, either.

0:11:35 > 0:11:38If these are what I think they are - forceps.

0:11:38 > 0:11:40- What most people do is that... - CLANGING

0:11:40 > 0:11:42..and that can be really scary for a mum. So you can say,

0:11:42 > 0:11:45"It's all right they're just checking that they fit together

0:11:45 > 0:11:48"and they tend to bang if baby needs a little bit of help."

0:11:48 > 0:11:51- What do you think about this?- Um...

0:11:54 > 0:11:57I don't know. I wouldn't know, where, what...

0:11:57 > 0:12:01What you do is you put that on baby's head, so Amber would push

0:12:01 > 0:12:05and the doctor will pump that. They pull and Amber pushes.

0:12:05 > 0:12:08There's a long way to go to turn this insensitive lad

0:12:08 > 0:12:11into a confident dad in the delivery room,

0:12:11 > 0:12:13but he's made a good first step.

0:12:13 > 0:12:16Thank you both for coming. We're going to bring this session

0:12:16 > 0:12:19to a close now. Amber, I'm going to give James some homework.

0:12:19 > 0:12:20James is going to come home

0:12:20 > 0:12:23and he's going to do exactly what you would like him to do for you.

0:12:23 > 0:12:24HE SNIGGERS

0:12:24 > 0:12:25OK.

0:12:25 > 0:12:28That's lovely, thank you.

0:12:28 > 0:12:30There might be weeks till the newborn arrives

0:12:30 > 0:12:33but in Stockport there's an early addition to the family.

0:12:35 > 0:12:38Meet your mother. In cardboard form.

0:12:38 > 0:12:40- Just a...- Yeah.

0:12:40 > 0:12:43- ..little bit creepy.- Yeah. Well, she's going to be living with us

0:12:43 > 0:12:48until the birth to motivate me,

0:12:48 > 0:12:50to make sure I'm there for the birth.

0:12:50 > 0:12:55Um, er, well...

0:12:55 > 0:12:56HE LAUGHS

0:12:58 > 0:13:01The homework for James today is to cook me dinner,

0:13:01 > 0:13:04so hopefully it'll be nice.

0:13:04 > 0:13:07I absolutely hate cooking.

0:13:09 > 0:13:13This is one of the most annoying things for me to do.

0:13:13 > 0:13:16Oh, and to help you out with losing weight,

0:13:16 > 0:13:19- I ate the rest of your Terry's Chocolate Orange.- You best not have.

0:13:19 > 0:13:21- If you have, you're a dickhead. - I actually have.

0:13:21 > 0:13:23- Then I'm not cooking for you. - Oh, you are.- No, I'm not.

0:13:23 > 0:13:26- You have to do something nice for me.- No, I'm not.

0:13:26 > 0:13:30- You don't need to whinge so much. - I'm being serious.

0:13:30 > 0:13:31Are you taking the mick?

0:13:31 > 0:13:35No. Just like you took the mick with eating my Terry's Chocolate Orange.

0:13:35 > 0:13:39I didn't think it would... it was a big deal.

0:13:39 > 0:13:40MUSIC: Same Love

0:13:40 > 0:13:42# Can't change

0:13:44 > 0:13:47# Even if I tried

0:13:47 > 0:13:49# Even if I wanted to... #

0:13:49 > 0:13:52Good luck cooking.

0:13:52 > 0:13:54I'm being deadly serious now.

0:13:55 > 0:13:58You knew I'd be pissed off if you ate it and you did it anyway.

0:13:58 > 0:14:00Oh, for God's sake.

0:14:04 > 0:14:06Despite a promising start,

0:14:06 > 0:14:09James has fallen at the first hurdle.

0:14:09 > 0:14:11Fuck's sake.

0:14:11 > 0:14:14Cos it's going to be shit and I can't be bothered.

0:14:15 > 0:14:18Susan's concerned about his attitude so she's called them both in

0:14:18 > 0:14:20for a crisis meeting.

0:14:20 > 0:14:22Right then, James, so are you being sympathetic?

0:14:22 > 0:14:24She doesn't deserve it at the moment.

0:14:24 > 0:14:26Huge pain in the backside.

0:14:26 > 0:14:30She's carrying your baby. You need to be kind to her.

0:14:30 > 0:14:33You know what we said about stress, keeping her stress levels down.

0:14:33 > 0:14:36Nobody's right or wrong. You're probably worried about one thing

0:14:36 > 0:14:38and you're worried about another. So just try and keep talking

0:14:38 > 0:14:41so you're not so stressed with each other.

0:14:41 > 0:14:43James, come on, look willing.

0:14:43 > 0:14:46You got this far, mate, you're going to be a dad soon.

0:14:46 > 0:14:48- See you.- Bye.

0:14:48 > 0:14:51If stress-head James can't keep it together, he'll be a disaster

0:14:51 > 0:14:56at the birth when Amber will need him to stay calm more than ever.

0:14:56 > 0:15:00James isn't the only one finding things difficult.

0:15:00 > 0:15:03Jay's worried he won't get over his fear of blood in time

0:15:03 > 0:15:06and the prospect of losing his place at the birth

0:15:06 > 0:15:08is staring him right in the face.

0:15:08 > 0:15:10MUSIC: Thriller by Michael Jackson

0:15:10 > 0:15:11Weirdo.

0:15:11 > 0:15:15'I don't think I can put into words how much it means to me'

0:15:15 > 0:15:18to make sure that I'm there at the birth, you know.

0:15:18 > 0:15:20My life wouldn't be worth living if I couldn't be there or...

0:15:20 > 0:15:22or wasn't there for whatever reason.

0:15:22 > 0:15:26So, you know, that's the reason why I'm doing this.

0:15:26 > 0:15:28For Jay's next midwife session,

0:15:28 > 0:15:31Debs is bringing him face to face with his worst nightmare.

0:15:31 > 0:15:33It's something he must get his head round

0:15:33 > 0:15:38if he's going to make it to the birth - a placenta.

0:15:38 > 0:15:40I'll get rid of all of this blood bit,

0:15:40 > 0:15:42so you don't have to look at that.

0:15:42 > 0:15:45The baby is actually in there.

0:15:45 > 0:15:47- Right, OK.- Can you see?

0:15:47 > 0:15:49So that's where your baby is

0:15:49 > 0:15:51and these membranes are really quite tough.

0:15:51 > 0:15:54And if I actually got the edges

0:15:54 > 0:15:58I could actually split them and pull them right back.

0:15:58 > 0:15:59It's very slippy, I don't know whether...

0:15:59 > 0:16:01be able to get to do that.

0:16:02 > 0:16:06- But are you OK?- I think about a nine on the...

0:16:06 > 0:16:08on the Jay meter.

0:16:08 > 0:16:10- On the passing out?- Yeah... - Do you want to sit down?

0:16:10 > 0:16:11Just have a minute, just...

0:16:11 > 0:16:14- I'm all right standing up.- Are you sure?- Honestly I'm fine, yeah.

0:16:14 > 0:16:17Just...when it's there, it's the smell. Oh, God, yeah,

0:16:17 > 0:16:19thought I was going to...

0:16:19 > 0:16:22Not going to talk about it cos I'll throw up.

0:16:22 > 0:16:25Some women do choose to take it away with them.

0:16:25 > 0:16:27And they've fried it with onions,

0:16:27 > 0:16:29they've made pate with it

0:16:29 > 0:16:32and the last lady I looked after made a smoothie with it.

0:16:32 > 0:16:35- Enough smoothie.- Yeah, can you imagine that?- No, thank you.

0:16:35 > 0:16:38- No, I don't think I could either. - I don't want... Why?

0:16:38 > 0:16:40Because it's got... full of goodness.

0:16:40 > 0:16:43So are apples but... Do you know what I mean?

0:16:43 > 0:16:45DEBS LAUGHS

0:16:45 > 0:16:50'I think Jay struggled today, but I think by seeing it,'

0:16:50 > 0:16:53even though he was obviously quite distressed on occasions

0:16:53 > 0:16:55and was trying to get out the door,

0:16:55 > 0:16:57he was sweating and feeling a little bit uncomfortable.

0:16:57 > 0:17:01I think the fact that he's actually seen it and approached it

0:17:01 > 0:17:03and dealt with it, will help him in the future.

0:17:03 > 0:17:06I thought I'd have to sit down midway through that

0:17:06 > 0:17:10and I thought I'd have to take a break through the middle.

0:17:10 > 0:17:14But, you know, it's amazing how, if you want something you'll...

0:17:14 > 0:17:15you'll get it done really.

0:17:17 > 0:17:21Two unlikely dads are now well into their sessions,

0:17:21 > 0:17:24so the midwives think it's a good time for them to meet up

0:17:24 > 0:17:26and compare notes.

0:17:26 > 0:17:29- Are you looking forward to it all? - I'm looking forward to being a dad.

0:17:29 > 0:17:34- Yeah.- Not necessarily as much, you know...- The birth.- Yeah.

0:17:34 > 0:17:37- Are you not nervous?- At the moment, it's just like, "Ugh."

0:17:37 > 0:17:40- But I imagine as it gets closer to the time...- Yeah, yeah.

0:17:40 > 0:17:42- ..I will start panicking. - How close?

0:17:42 > 0:17:46- We've only got a month. - Yeah, I know what you mean.

0:17:48 > 0:17:51With the clock ticking, the midwives have arranged for the lads

0:17:51 > 0:17:54to have a surprise trip to the cinema.

0:17:54 > 0:17:57- Here's your popcorn. - All right, cheers.

0:17:58 > 0:18:00What do you think we're going to see here?

0:18:00 > 0:18:02Worst case, they're going to make us

0:18:02 > 0:18:05watch something to do with labour and somebody in pain.

0:18:05 > 0:18:08Best case it'll be an entertaining film.

0:18:08 > 0:18:09WOMAN SCREAMS IN PAIN

0:18:09 > 0:18:11Make that the worst case scenario.

0:18:11 > 0:18:14- Yep.- Yep.- I'll put this down.

0:18:14 > 0:18:16I'm psychic me. I know, right?

0:18:17 > 0:18:19WOMAN SCREAMS IN PAIN

0:18:19 > 0:18:21Does that not gross you out?

0:18:21 > 0:18:24- Oh....- That does.- ..fucking hell.

0:18:28 > 0:18:30Oh, my God.

0:18:30 > 0:18:33At this stage, I'd probably have said something inappropriate

0:18:33 > 0:18:35and got slapped.

0:18:35 > 0:18:38- Yeah, on that note.- Oh, my God.

0:18:38 > 0:18:40That... I think that's just scarred me for life.

0:18:40 > 0:18:45Anyone who goes through that deserves a bit of sympathy.

0:18:46 > 0:18:48It's pretty, pretty graphic really.

0:18:48 > 0:18:51I didn't really expect that.

0:18:51 > 0:18:53I wasn't sick and I didn't pass out.

0:18:53 > 0:18:56So I guess that's a step in the right direction.

0:18:57 > 0:19:01But just as Jay looks like he's on the road to recovery,

0:19:01 > 0:19:05back in Stockport girlfriend Hazel drops a bombshell.

0:19:05 > 0:19:06She wants a water birth,

0:19:06 > 0:19:10giving blood phobic Jay a whole new set of problems.

0:19:10 > 0:19:16I don't particularly, like, want to be involved too much downstairs,

0:19:16 > 0:19:19I'm a head end kind of guy.

0:19:19 > 0:19:20Hi, Jay, do you want to come in?

0:19:20 > 0:19:23Looks like midwife Debs has got a whole new challenge on her hands.

0:19:23 > 0:19:25Welcome back.

0:19:25 > 0:19:27Jay needs to know what he's up against

0:19:27 > 0:19:30if he's going to keep his head above water.

0:19:30 > 0:19:33- That equates to about 200ml.- OK.

0:19:33 > 0:19:36Which isn't that much, is it? So I want you to hold it.

0:19:36 > 0:19:40- That is roughly how much blood loss there's going to be.- Right, yeah.

0:19:40 > 0:19:43Debs is using food colouring instead of real blood.

0:19:43 > 0:19:46What I want to do in a minute is show you how that looks

0:19:46 > 0:19:49- when it's not in that nice cup. - Right, OK.

0:19:49 > 0:19:52So if you start just pouring a little bit of that in

0:19:52 > 0:19:55- and sometimes that's what you see. - Yeah, yeah.

0:19:55 > 0:19:57You see it come out whilst the lady's in the pool.

0:19:57 > 0:20:00- Right, OK.- Carry on.

0:20:00 > 0:20:02And then this is like the final bit.

0:20:02 > 0:20:05And if I had a pool that had gone murky like this,

0:20:05 > 0:20:09I would know that that was normal and I'd be really happy with that.

0:20:09 > 0:20:11- Does that help you a little bit? - Definitely, yeah.

0:20:11 > 0:20:13- So you can just weigh it up. - Definitely.- Good.

0:20:13 > 0:20:15I think I can handle that.

0:20:15 > 0:20:17Actually it's not that much. It's not that bad.

0:20:17 > 0:20:19A lot of it's the fear of the unknown.

0:20:19 > 0:20:23So it's probably not something that I need to worry as much about

0:20:23 > 0:20:24as what I first thought.

0:20:24 > 0:20:28Looks like Jay might be winning the fight with his phobia.

0:20:28 > 0:20:30Time to call the mother-in-law

0:20:30 > 0:20:33and tell her she might not be needed after all.

0:20:34 > 0:20:36While Jay is making good progress,

0:20:36 > 0:20:40joker James still needs to take his role seriously.

0:20:40 > 0:20:42So midwife Susan has called him in.

0:20:42 > 0:20:46My main concern with James is he's unsympathetic at the moment.

0:20:46 > 0:20:50So by understanding the positions in labour, how baby's coming out,

0:20:50 > 0:20:52he can sympathise.

0:20:52 > 0:20:55She wants James to use modelling clay to create

0:20:55 > 0:20:59some of the positions Amber may use during labour.

0:20:59 > 0:21:02There you go. There you go, there's the first one.

0:21:02 > 0:21:05- Right, so next one. - Is she face down?

0:21:05 > 0:21:08Yeah. Bum up in the air, there's her arms.

0:21:08 > 0:21:11OK, that's a really good position to have a baby in. Yeah?

0:21:11 > 0:21:14- Yeah.- Is there any chance you could show me it?

0:21:15 > 0:21:19Just the theory of it...on the mat,

0:21:19 > 0:21:23just to give you an idea of how Amber might feel as well.

0:21:23 > 0:21:26If you can do this, Amber's got to do it and she's having a baby,

0:21:26 > 0:21:29- you're keeping your clothes on. Come on.- I can't do that.

0:21:29 > 0:21:32You can't. Is it embarrassment? Or is it a bit vulnerable?

0:21:32 > 0:21:34No, it's more embarrassment more than anything.

0:21:34 > 0:21:38Yeah, and that's worth remembering, because when Amber's in labour

0:21:38 > 0:21:41and she's got her bottoms off and her legs open, yeah?

0:21:41 > 0:21:44She's going to feel vulnerable, she's going to need you to be there.

0:21:44 > 0:21:45With James refusing to budge,

0:21:45 > 0:21:48it's time for Susan to get her legs out.

0:21:48 > 0:21:52Show me what sort of position she's going to be in...

0:21:52 > 0:21:55- Amber's going to be in to push this baby out.- OK.- Over to you.

0:21:57 > 0:21:59OK.

0:21:59 > 0:22:02- Oh, baby really...- Push. - ..does not want to come out.

0:22:02 > 0:22:04Yeah, no, you're going to need to push.

0:22:04 > 0:22:06God, if this is difficult,

0:22:06 > 0:22:08- I can't imagine how it is to be a woman.- Exactly.

0:22:08 > 0:22:11Right, so this is how... Stop, stop. OK.

0:22:11 > 0:22:14When the head appears that's known as a ring of fire,

0:22:14 > 0:22:17that will sting like mad. It's another gentle push then.

0:22:17 > 0:22:21And "boop" with its placenta and up onto mummy's tummy.

0:22:21 > 0:22:23So you see the position you're in and see how you might be

0:22:23 > 0:22:24feeling a little bit vulnerable.

0:22:24 > 0:22:27Now you can understand when people are down there and

0:22:27 > 0:22:30telling her things and asking her to do things, how she might feel.

0:22:30 > 0:22:31I'm sure that she'll...

0:22:31 > 0:22:34I'm sure she'll be teased when she's relaxed and recouped.

0:22:34 > 0:22:37- Yeah, not at the time.- Not at the time.- Not at the time.

0:22:37 > 0:22:39Well done, James. Well done.

0:22:39 > 0:22:41He wasn't keen to show his vulnerable side on some of

0:22:41 > 0:22:45the positions with his legs open, so that was quite interesting as well.

0:22:45 > 0:22:48He'll understand how Amber might feel.

0:22:48 > 0:22:51For James the penny is starting to drop.

0:22:51 > 0:22:55But in Stockport, despite progress with his blood phobia,

0:22:55 > 0:22:58Jay is still struggling to show any sympathy.

0:22:58 > 0:23:02I'd just quite like him to be more sympathetic in that

0:23:02 > 0:23:06my body is really changing at the moment and I am tired.

0:23:06 > 0:23:11Midwife Debs wants to help him empathise with girlfriend Hazel.

0:23:11 > 0:23:12- Two boobs.- Yeah.

0:23:12 > 0:23:15- Uterus, baby in there.- Yeah.

0:23:15 > 0:23:17You're going to put this on...

0:23:17 > 0:23:21The empathy belly will make Jay instantly 37 weeks pregnant

0:23:21 > 0:23:24by adding an extra two stone.

0:23:24 > 0:23:26- So how does it feel?- Heavy.- Yes.

0:23:26 > 0:23:30So what I want you to do is to wear that

0:23:30 > 0:23:33- while you do something that you would normally do.- Right, OK.

0:23:33 > 0:23:36- It might be something at home, DIY, that kind of thing...- Right.

0:23:36 > 0:23:39- ..wearing that the whole time.- OK.

0:23:39 > 0:23:43What has happened to my life that has resulted me...

0:23:43 > 0:23:47in me standing here with this... this thing on?

0:23:48 > 0:23:50Baby's nursery still isn't finished

0:23:50 > 0:23:55but thanks to midwife Debs, Hazel's finally getting a helping hand.

0:23:55 > 0:23:57Don't forget you need to bend down

0:23:57 > 0:23:59- and do the bits at the bottom as well.- Yeah.

0:24:02 > 0:24:04I think I might do anything as long as I know

0:24:04 > 0:24:07I don't have to wear this thing again. I'll do whatever you want.

0:24:10 > 0:24:12Are you going to stop?

0:24:12 > 0:24:14I'm just having a breather.

0:24:14 > 0:24:18# Let's sweat, let's sweat

0:24:18 > 0:24:20# Let's sweat

0:24:20 > 0:24:22# Let's sweat... #

0:24:22 > 0:24:25Jay might not have been an understanding partner in the past,

0:24:25 > 0:24:28but his new bump is giving him a wake-up call.

0:24:30 > 0:24:33I'm sorry for not being sympathetic.

0:24:33 > 0:24:37I'm going to salute every single pregnant woman I see from now on.

0:24:37 > 0:24:41If there is ever a dad in any sort of doubt about what

0:24:41 > 0:24:43their missus is going through

0:24:43 > 0:24:49they need to try on and wear this suit because it is beyond a joke.

0:24:49 > 0:24:53On the plus side, you can rest your drink on it.

0:24:56 > 0:24:57- Right.- Bye.

0:24:57 > 0:24:59With his baby due in less than a week,

0:24:59 > 0:25:03James needs urgent help in keeping his stress under control.

0:25:03 > 0:25:06Delivery is a really emotional place

0:25:06 > 0:25:08and Dad's desperately wanting everything to go right with Mum.

0:25:08 > 0:25:11James will be worried about what's happening to Amber.

0:25:11 > 0:25:13If he reacts the wrong way, it's going to totally muck up the way

0:25:13 > 0:25:15that Amber feels about the delivery.

0:25:15 > 0:25:19Susan's plan is to help James learn to conquer one fear

0:25:19 > 0:25:21by coming face to face with another.

0:25:21 > 0:25:23We know he's got a fear of snakes.

0:25:23 > 0:25:25Hopefully if he can hold the snake, he'll confront some

0:25:25 > 0:25:27of his other fears in the labour room.

0:25:27 > 0:25:29All these animals are lovely.

0:25:29 > 0:25:31Is there anything that you would hate to see in the zoo?

0:25:31 > 0:25:34- Is there anything that bothers you? - Yeah, snakes.

0:25:34 > 0:25:36- You don't like snakes?- No. - Why don't you like snakes?

0:25:36 > 0:25:39It's the stage where I would not go anywhere near them

0:25:39 > 0:25:41and I would run a mile.

0:25:42 > 0:25:45But James won't be able to head for the exit when Amber is in labour.

0:25:45 > 0:25:47No.

0:25:47 > 0:25:49He needs to prove to himself that he can stay calm

0:25:49 > 0:25:51in the face of his fears.

0:25:51 > 0:25:54So can he handle this slippery customer?

0:25:54 > 0:25:56Do you know? I would give it a go.

0:26:06 > 0:26:07Considering I absolutely...

0:26:07 > 0:26:10like, terrified of snakes, that feels really weird.

0:26:10 > 0:26:14How about putting your whole hand on rather than just your finger?

0:26:14 > 0:26:16Well done, you've conquered a fear.

0:26:16 > 0:26:18You've touched a snake, that's a big thing.

0:26:18 > 0:26:19Cos if you can conquer a fear...

0:26:19 > 0:26:22Actually if you're a little bit frightened during delivery

0:26:22 > 0:26:24and you think, "It's OK, I don't need to run,

0:26:24 > 0:26:26"I'm here to support Amber." And you'll do it.

0:26:26 > 0:26:31Speechless. There you go. That's...that's how I'd define that,

0:26:31 > 0:26:34like, over the last couple of sessions it's all started to, like,

0:26:34 > 0:26:36kick in and, like, boot the system up sort of thing.

0:26:36 > 0:26:38It's starting to feel real.

0:26:38 > 0:26:40Definitely more so in the last couple of, like, last week or so

0:26:40 > 0:26:43than it has throughout the last eight months.

0:26:49 > 0:26:53With Jay and James only days from their due dates,

0:26:53 > 0:26:56they're fighting to be ready for their new arrivals.

0:26:56 > 0:27:01- Because that's what it's like, 700 calories an hour...- Right.

0:27:01 > 0:27:03- ..it's going to use up labour.- OK.

0:27:03 > 0:27:07Blowing up balloons can simulate labour.

0:27:08 > 0:27:12And there's no let up in their intensive preparations.

0:27:12 > 0:27:15- That swaying of your hips...- Yeah.

0:27:15 > 0:27:19..from side to side actually jiggles the baby down the pelvis.

0:27:19 > 0:27:21See your waters are going to break now.

0:27:21 > 0:27:23And it seems to be paying off.

0:27:23 > 0:27:26James is finally putting Amber's feelings first.

0:27:26 > 0:27:28I think I've changed.

0:27:28 > 0:27:32Other people have noticed a change, especially Amber and stuff.

0:27:32 > 0:27:36You know, I'll give her a massage and I won't stress her out.

0:27:36 > 0:27:39So, all in all, I'd say the sessions have been a great help.

0:27:39 > 0:27:43Yeah, bring baby up, turn him over and bring him up and up to Hazel.

0:27:43 > 0:27:48And then if you...if you then want to cut the cord, that's the time.

0:27:48 > 0:27:50Panic, panic.

0:27:50 > 0:27:52Can Jay really face up to his phobia?

0:27:52 > 0:27:55Obviously I'm still anxious about the blood

0:27:55 > 0:27:56and that sort of stuff.

0:27:56 > 0:27:59I'm a hell of a lot more confident when it actually comes to

0:27:59 > 0:28:02going to hospital and I think I'll be all right.

0:28:02 > 0:28:03Touch wood.

0:28:03 > 0:28:06They'll need to put all their preparation into practice

0:28:06 > 0:28:09as they take on the biggest test of all.

0:28:09 > 0:28:11It's not all hard work, though.

0:28:11 > 0:28:15To celebrate their last days of freedom before the baby's arrival,

0:28:15 > 0:28:17James is taking Amber on a night out.

0:28:20 > 0:28:21That's fine.

0:28:21 > 0:28:23But it's not going to plan.

0:28:23 > 0:28:25Amber is concerned about the baby

0:28:25 > 0:28:28because she hasn't felt it kick all day.

0:28:28 > 0:28:32She hasn't had any baby movements, so she wants to go home.

0:28:33 > 0:28:36- What does that mean? I don't... - You have to have ten a day.

0:28:36 > 0:28:38Oh, really?

0:28:38 > 0:28:41- You ready?- Yeah, can we go home? - You're going home?

0:28:41 > 0:28:45Amber has only had one kick today and she's meant to have ten.

0:28:45 > 0:28:48James takes charge and takes Amber to hospital.

0:28:51 > 0:28:52INTERCOM RINGS

0:28:52 > 0:28:54Hey there, I've been... I've called the midwife

0:28:54 > 0:28:58- and she said come down. - OK, come in.- Thank you.

0:28:58 > 0:29:01Yeah, I'm actually really impressed with him.

0:29:01 > 0:29:02Bless him.

0:29:03 > 0:29:05It's made me a lot calmer.

0:29:05 > 0:29:08I'm a lot calmer knowing that he's not stressed.

0:29:08 > 0:29:09I've got her to, like,

0:29:09 > 0:29:11drink something fizzy, drink something cold,

0:29:11 > 0:29:14- lay on her side.- Yeah, you've done exactly the right thing.

0:29:14 > 0:29:16The hospital are concerned about the lack of movements

0:29:16 > 0:29:19so decide to monitor Amber.

0:29:19 > 0:29:23I bet you if you start playing with your bump it'll start moving.

0:29:23 > 0:29:25- Normally it's...- It's moving.

0:29:25 > 0:29:29- Ah, see there we go.- Baby's moving now.- Yeah, look at that.

0:29:29 > 0:29:32I told you, you just need to sit down and play with your bump.

0:29:32 > 0:29:34They've been given the all clear

0:29:34 > 0:29:37and James is finally showing some understanding

0:29:37 > 0:29:40of what Amber's going through.

0:29:40 > 0:29:43Props to you, like, I couldn't do it.

0:29:43 > 0:29:44I'd whinge more than you.

0:29:44 > 0:29:48I'd be like, "Rub my feet, rub my back, make me a drink,

0:29:48 > 0:29:52- "make me dinner, love me!"- Aw.

0:29:52 > 0:29:55At least he's learnt to say the right thing...

0:29:55 > 0:29:57almost.

0:29:57 > 0:29:59And if it comes out ginger, we'll shove it back up.

0:30:03 > 0:30:05James has proved he can stay calm

0:30:05 > 0:30:08and help Amber in a stressful situation,

0:30:08 > 0:30:10but will he hold it together at the birth?

0:30:17 > 0:30:20In Stockport, Hazel's labour has begun

0:30:20 > 0:30:23and a newly sympathetic Jay is in full action mode.

0:30:23 > 0:30:26Have you got cotton wool balls in the bag already?

0:30:27 > 0:30:30Using an app, he's timing contractions on his phone

0:30:30 > 0:30:35and so far, the only mother-in-law in sight is cardboard.

0:30:35 > 0:30:37At the minute, there's no going back.

0:30:37 > 0:30:40All you can do is just stand there and try and be supportive.

0:30:42 > 0:30:43'Hello, triage, can I help?'

0:30:43 > 0:30:47Hiya, yeah, I'm ringing on behalf of Hazel, I think

0:30:47 > 0:30:50she's really to come in, she's told...she's struggling now, yeah.

0:30:50 > 0:30:52HAZEL WAILS

0:30:55 > 0:30:58It's time for this former cage fighter to get ready

0:30:58 > 0:31:00for the biggest bout of his life.

0:31:02 > 0:31:06In the last few weeks, hardman Jay has had to man up

0:31:06 > 0:31:09to confront his fear of blood head-on...

0:31:09 > 0:31:11Oh, God, I thought I was gon...

0:31:11 > 0:31:14I'm not going to talk about it, cos I'll throw up.

0:31:14 > 0:31:17..and prove he's got a sympathetic side.

0:31:17 > 0:31:21I'm going to salute every single pregnant woman I see from now on.

0:31:21 > 0:31:22Star jumps.

0:31:22 > 0:31:25The midwives have given him the skills he needs

0:31:25 > 0:31:27to help Hazel through the labour.

0:31:27 > 0:31:30Now it's up to Jay to put it into practice.

0:31:32 > 0:31:34I know, I know.

0:31:39 > 0:31:41We've started running the pool.

0:31:41 > 0:31:44If you feel that you just want to settle in the room a little bit

0:31:44 > 0:31:46and just keep mobile and a bit of gravity...

0:31:46 > 0:31:48No, I want to try out the pool, I think...

0:31:48 > 0:31:50You want to try the pool, that's fine.

0:31:50 > 0:31:54Just a few weeks ago, blood-phobic Jay was terrified

0:31:54 > 0:31:57by Hazel's plan for a water birth.

0:31:57 > 0:32:01Now the big day's arrived, can he overcome his fear?

0:32:01 > 0:32:04This could go on for days.

0:32:08 > 0:32:10Nah, it won't.

0:32:10 > 0:32:16They're saying a centimetre an hour.

0:32:16 > 0:32:17It progressed.

0:32:17 > 0:32:19And you're already five

0:32:19 > 0:32:22and you've gotta be ten before you start pushing.

0:32:22 > 0:32:25So at the most, it's going to be six or seven, in't it?

0:32:25 > 0:32:28- Yeah.- No need to rush. Everything must happen in its own time.

0:32:28 > 0:32:31- Can you stay in the pool as...? - Absolutely.

0:32:31 > 0:32:35- ..as long as you like?- Yeah, yep, you can stay in the pool until...

0:32:35 > 0:32:38We'll keep making sure the temperature's, you know,

0:32:38 > 0:32:39the right temperature for you.

0:32:39 > 0:32:42Yeah, so you can stay in the pool till the end.

0:32:42 > 0:32:45Now and again, it might be that you bob out to go to the loo.

0:32:45 > 0:32:46Right, OK.

0:32:46 > 0:32:49But it's up to you, and that all helps everything happen as well.

0:32:49 > 0:32:50So...

0:32:55 > 0:32:56Slowly.

0:33:09 > 0:33:13It's a lot more intense than I thought it would be.

0:33:13 > 0:33:16'Like, my sort of role is sort of just left to get on with it,

0:33:16 > 0:33:21'which is, which is nice, but it's you know, a lot more...'

0:33:21 > 0:33:24responsibility, I suppose, than I thought I'd have.

0:33:25 > 0:33:28Jay might be blown away by the scale of the task,

0:33:28 > 0:33:31but at least he can impress Hazel with his knowledge.

0:33:32 > 0:33:34You'll get a big surge of hormones

0:33:34 > 0:33:36that'll help your contractions carry on.

0:33:36 > 0:33:37And what are they?

0:33:37 > 0:33:39- Hormones.- Hormones.

0:33:39 > 0:33:41No, what hormones?

0:33:41 > 0:33:43- Er, adrenaline and oxytocin.- Yeah.

0:33:43 > 0:33:44Good!

0:33:44 > 0:33:49You've been doing your research. You've been taught well, yeah.

0:33:49 > 0:33:52MUSIC: Tired Of Waiting by The Kinks

0:33:52 > 0:33:55# So tired, tired of waiting

0:33:55 > 0:34:01# Tired of waiting for you... #

0:34:01 > 0:34:05Despite Jay swotting up, things aren't progressing.

0:34:05 > 0:34:07Hazel's contractions have ground to a halt

0:34:07 > 0:34:10and her waters still haven't broken.

0:34:10 > 0:34:15When you first come into hospital, you know,

0:34:15 > 0:34:18you'd been contracting well in the car and you come in and everything's

0:34:18 > 0:34:21all a bit strange and you're getting used to a new environment.

0:34:21 > 0:34:24So contractions can go a little bit quieter.

0:34:24 > 0:34:28After three hours, they give up on the birthing pool

0:34:28 > 0:34:32and try to get things moving by walking around.

0:34:32 > 0:34:33It's not what Hazel wanted,

0:34:33 > 0:34:36and she'll now need Jay to keep it together.

0:34:40 > 0:34:43- But am I? - You are. Course you are!

0:34:45 > 0:34:47Come all that time and all that way, just...

0:34:47 > 0:34:49Just feels like I've still not got anywhere.

0:34:49 > 0:34:51You ha... Course you have!

0:34:53 > 0:34:55Do you want me to dump you in one of them chairs?

0:34:55 > 0:34:58Today's also the biggest test for James,

0:34:58 > 0:35:00because Amber's gone into labour.

0:35:00 > 0:35:03Over the last six weeks, midwife Susan has got James

0:35:03 > 0:35:06to take his foot out of his mouth...

0:35:06 > 0:35:09And that's coming out of her body - she needs your support in that.

0:35:09 > 0:35:11No flapping, nothing inappropriate.

0:35:11 > 0:35:15I wouldn't want Mrs Boa on me, around me,

0:35:15 > 0:35:17or I'll be out that door.

0:35:17 > 0:35:20..and to stop flapping and deal with pressure.

0:35:20 > 0:35:21Do you know? I would give it a go.

0:35:22 > 0:35:25Well done, you've conquered a fear.

0:35:25 > 0:35:27You've touched a snake and that's a big thing.

0:35:28 > 0:35:30- Hello, Amber.- Hello.

0:35:30 > 0:35:32- Are you ready to come down?- Yeah.

0:35:32 > 0:35:36Now the time has come for James to keep his stress under control

0:35:36 > 0:35:37and be there for Amber.

0:35:37 > 0:35:40MACHINE BEEPS

0:35:40 > 0:35:41You've got mail!

0:35:42 > 0:35:44Oh, God, phones galore.

0:35:44 > 0:35:46But it's already gone out the window.

0:35:46 > 0:35:49Amber might be five centimetres dilated,

0:35:49 > 0:35:52but James has reverted back to his old ways

0:35:52 > 0:35:54and is causing tension on the labour ward.

0:35:54 > 0:35:58Does it help with James rubbing your back a little bit? Yeah.

0:35:58 > 0:36:00So even though she might make noises like, grrr,

0:36:00 > 0:36:02what she's doing is coping with that, so do that.

0:36:02 > 0:36:04No, no, I did it yesterday and asked her if it was OK

0:36:04 > 0:36:06after she was in pain, she told me to fuck off. So...

0:36:06 > 0:36:07That was yesterday, James.

0:36:07 > 0:36:09- I don't care.- Today's today. No, it does.

0:36:09 > 0:36:11- I did not use the words "eff off", now, did I?- No.

0:36:11 > 0:36:13- No, you probably used something else.- Right.

0:36:13 > 0:36:15I said, "No, I'm fine, thank you."

0:36:15 > 0:36:19So today she's just told you she'd like it, and that's the big help.

0:36:19 > 0:36:21Remember what we said? Stay calm...

0:36:21 > 0:36:22- I'm calm.- No, no.

0:36:22 > 0:36:24If you stay calm, she'll stay calm, it'll hurt less.

0:36:24 > 0:36:26I've been calm all day.

0:36:26 > 0:36:27But she wants you to rub her back.

0:36:28 > 0:36:30So you're doing really well, Amber.

0:36:32 > 0:36:35And you're doing really well, James. Right?

0:36:38 > 0:36:40You tell him what you want, Amber.

0:36:40 > 0:36:44James is nervous, and James is keeping it all hidden.

0:36:44 > 0:36:45He's not really being supportive.

0:36:45 > 0:36:48'So the stuff that we've done in the sessions is not showing at all yet.'

0:36:48 > 0:36:51He's a closed book at the moment, and he needs to remember

0:36:51 > 0:36:55what we learnt in the sessions to make him chill and make Amber chill.

0:36:55 > 0:36:58They've only been at the hospital for two hours,

0:36:58 > 0:37:01but it's already getting too much for James.

0:37:01 > 0:37:03So he decides it's time to get some air.

0:37:03 > 0:37:07# Are you crazy, are you crazy Are you crazy, must be stupid... #

0:37:07 > 0:37:10James has just said to me that he's getting really hot and

0:37:10 > 0:37:13stressed in there and he just needs to get out, so he's left the room.

0:37:13 > 0:37:15He is beginning to panic a little bit and I'm not sure

0:37:15 > 0:37:18he knows how to relate that and how to cope at the moment.

0:37:18 > 0:37:21So I'm going to go and see him, give him a bit of reassurance.

0:37:21 > 0:37:22Talk about after the baby's been,

0:37:22 > 0:37:25and sort of bring all the tension down and hopefully he'll be able

0:37:25 > 0:37:28to come back in and support Amber a little bit more.

0:37:28 > 0:37:31Just remember what we did. You can do this, all right?

0:37:31 > 0:37:33- I'm fine.- Yeah, but you're shutting up a little bit,

0:37:33 > 0:37:36you're pulling away from me and it's like, I'm trying to help you,

0:37:36 > 0:37:37and you're doing so great.

0:37:37 > 0:37:39Rather than waiting for her to say, "Do this,"

0:37:39 > 0:37:42cos she can't think of that. She can only think of doing that.

0:37:42 > 0:37:44So if you're rubbing her back and doing it...

0:37:44 > 0:37:46No, you're doing fine, I'm not criticising you, sweetheart.

0:37:46 > 0:37:49If you're doing that without her even asking, that's even better.

0:37:49 > 0:37:52But if when she's actually doing something and you just think, "Oh,"

0:37:52 > 0:37:55just chill, cos she's fine, she's breathing, she's doing whatever.

0:37:57 > 0:37:59If James can't sort out his stress soon,

0:37:59 > 0:38:03it will be too late to be any use to Amber during the birth.

0:38:06 > 0:38:09You're doing great. You're doing great.

0:38:09 > 0:38:11- Keep breathing. - SHE WAILS

0:38:11 > 0:38:15Back in Stockport, Hazel's almost fully dilated

0:38:15 > 0:38:17and her waters still haven't broken.

0:38:20 > 0:38:24The midwives are going to use an amni-hook to get things moving.

0:38:24 > 0:38:28It's exactly the sort of medical procedure that has scared

0:38:28 > 0:38:30squeamish Jay in the past.

0:38:30 > 0:38:32If these waters pop,

0:38:32 > 0:38:35is that going to bring things along a little bit more?

0:38:35 > 0:38:36- Yes.- I just want it done.

0:38:36 > 0:38:39I'll do my best, OK? I'll do my best to get it done.

0:38:40 > 0:38:44Jay needs to put his fears aside and stay strong for Hazel.

0:38:49 > 0:38:52SHE GROANS You can do it.

0:38:55 > 0:38:57SHE WAILS

0:39:00 > 0:39:04There's some waters in front of your baby's head, OK?

0:39:04 > 0:39:05We're going to pop those waters,

0:39:05 > 0:39:08cos I don't want anything getting too tight.

0:39:08 > 0:39:09Yeah, yeah, yeah.

0:39:09 > 0:39:11Just get things going a bit more.

0:39:11 > 0:39:14SHE CRIES OUT

0:39:20 > 0:39:22OK? Well done, you star.

0:39:22 > 0:39:24Thank you.

0:39:24 > 0:39:27Seeing Hazel in pain is certainly not nice...

0:39:29 > 0:39:33..but I'm quite surprised how much of a help I've been to Hazel.

0:39:33 > 0:39:36Like, just, even just sitting there.

0:39:37 > 0:39:40She keeps saying that it's helping and all the rest of it.

0:39:40 > 0:39:41So, pretty good, yeah.

0:39:41 > 0:39:46It feels like you're fully dilating, OK? Now the fun starts.

0:39:46 > 0:39:49Fully dilated, all your waters have gone.

0:39:51 > 0:39:52Just waiting for him now.

0:39:54 > 0:39:57So just get yourself turned round.

0:39:57 > 0:40:00Jay has managed to stay in control so far,

0:40:00 > 0:40:04but will he be able to overcome his biggest fear, blood,

0:40:04 > 0:40:06now it's time to push?

0:40:10 > 0:40:13That's it. That was really good pushing.

0:40:13 > 0:40:15You really moved your baby down a lot then.

0:40:15 > 0:40:16OK. OK.

0:40:16 > 0:40:18All right?

0:40:18 > 0:40:20OK.

0:40:20 > 0:40:23You've got one more, that's it. Really brave, keep pushing.

0:40:23 > 0:40:25Chin down on your chest, that's it.

0:40:25 > 0:40:27Head down. Give him a shove at the end.

0:40:27 > 0:40:30- And another one. - Go on, give him a shove at the end.

0:40:30 > 0:40:33That's it. That's it. That's it. Go on.

0:40:33 > 0:40:37The second time you pushed, that was when I saw the labia

0:40:37 > 0:40:38just opening a wee bit

0:40:38 > 0:40:41and saw the black on your baby's head, all right?

0:40:41 > 0:40:42You can do it, come on.

0:40:42 > 0:40:44Oh, you're doing so well. It's good.

0:40:44 > 0:40:48But despite the progress, the midwives have noticed an issue.

0:40:48 > 0:40:51The baby isn't moving and its heart rate has dropped.

0:40:51 > 0:40:53106.

0:40:53 > 0:40:57Hazel's in a lot of pain, but it's now too late for an epidural.

0:40:57 > 0:41:00Come on, let's get you over the other side.

0:41:00 > 0:41:01You really moved this baby.

0:41:01 > 0:41:04There are signs the baby's distressed

0:41:04 > 0:41:07so she's being moved from the birthing centre to a labour ward

0:41:07 > 0:41:09where she can be monitored by the doctors.

0:41:11 > 0:41:12Is that better?

0:41:12 > 0:41:14At Peterborough Hospital,

0:41:14 > 0:41:17James is back by Amber's side following Susan's pep talk.

0:41:21 > 0:41:24If you need water or anything, let me know.

0:41:24 > 0:41:26If you want me to, you know, do something for you, I'll do it.

0:41:26 > 0:41:30Amber's been contracting for almost 24 hours now,

0:41:30 > 0:41:33and James is finally saying the right thing.

0:41:33 > 0:41:38Amber, breathe. Big breaths, please. Come on.

0:41:38 > 0:41:40You're doing brilliantly.

0:41:40 > 0:41:43Midwife Susan's words of encouragement seem to be working,

0:41:43 > 0:41:47and he's helping to give Amber gas and air to reduce the pain.

0:41:47 > 0:41:48In...

0:41:49 > 0:41:51..and out.

0:41:51 > 0:41:52Big breath.

0:41:54 > 0:41:55And out.

0:41:56 > 0:41:57I'm proud of you.

0:42:00 > 0:42:03Amber's still five centimetres after a couple of hours.

0:42:05 > 0:42:08She's got the need to push, but she shouldn't be pushing.

0:42:08 > 0:42:10'I'm... I'm fine, I'm calm, I'm just tired.'

0:42:10 > 0:42:13She's knackered and won't let me leave her side.

0:42:13 > 0:42:15So I'm going to go back.

0:42:17 > 0:42:19Breathe in, breathe out.

0:42:21 > 0:42:23He's doing really well getting Amber to breathe.

0:42:23 > 0:42:25It's almost like a control thing.

0:42:25 > 0:42:27He's getting her to take control of the breathing and he feels

0:42:27 > 0:42:30like he's doing something, so that's going really, really well.

0:42:30 > 0:42:32In, out.

0:42:32 > 0:42:36So he's caring for her emotionally, but I think physically,

0:42:36 > 0:42:39if he could be out the room, he'd be out of it at the moment.

0:42:39 > 0:42:42For the baby, well done.

0:42:46 > 0:42:48Come on, babe, deep breaths.

0:42:48 > 0:42:49SHE GROANS

0:42:49 > 0:42:52The baby's head's just sat right down in your pelvis, OK?

0:42:52 > 0:42:56But will he be able to keep his cool if things get complicated?

0:42:56 > 0:42:59So this baby, I think his head's getting so squashed

0:42:59 > 0:43:03inside your pelvis, picking up again beautifully now, OK?

0:43:03 > 0:43:05Sometimes this happens and these babies...

0:43:05 > 0:43:09it's a stressful time for them when their head's getting squashed, OK?

0:43:09 > 0:43:10Well done.

0:43:10 > 0:43:14The baby's heart rate has dropped to a worrying level.

0:43:14 > 0:43:16The medical team decide to call a doctor.

0:43:16 > 0:43:19Is it all right if I examine you? It's OK, yes?

0:43:19 > 0:43:22She's got a really strong urge to push.

0:43:22 > 0:43:23- Ow!- Amber!?

0:43:23 > 0:43:25Stick out your chest.

0:43:25 > 0:43:27OK, Amber, it's not moving the baby.

0:43:27 > 0:43:31You need to push right onto your bottom as if you're constipated, OK?

0:43:32 > 0:43:35Yeah, right, as if you're really trying to open your bowels, OK?

0:43:42 > 0:43:44I think the best thing is,

0:43:44 > 0:43:47because the baby's showing signs of tiredness, you are tired as well.

0:43:47 > 0:43:48- Yeah.- OK.

0:43:48 > 0:43:52And as I said, baby's lying sideways rather than the right way.

0:43:52 > 0:43:54It's best to take you to theatre.

0:43:54 > 0:43:57I'll examine you down there again, OK?

0:43:57 > 0:44:00We'll make you comfortable, OK, give you a spinal anaesthetic.

0:44:00 > 0:44:04- Yeah.- So I think it's needed because it's happening, the baby is...

0:44:04 > 0:44:07the baby's heart beat is dropping for a while now, OK?

0:44:07 > 0:44:10Are you all right with that, do you understand?

0:44:10 > 0:44:12- Just going to go to theatre...- Yeah.

0:44:12 > 0:44:14..and still try and get the baby out that way, all right?

0:44:14 > 0:44:17She'll still need you to look after her, you're doing great.

0:44:17 > 0:44:18Well done, Amber.

0:44:20 > 0:44:23The situation is serious, but James is managing to keep calm

0:44:23 > 0:44:27and remember everything Susan's taught him.

0:44:28 > 0:44:31The baby needs to be delivered quickly in theatre,

0:44:31 > 0:44:35and there is a possibility Amber will need a C-section.

0:44:35 > 0:44:39As she's taken away, James finally lets his calm exterior slip.

0:44:39 > 0:44:41(It'll be fine, all right?)

0:44:43 > 0:44:45What's your biggest worry down here?

0:44:45 > 0:44:47Anything you want to ask before we go in?

0:44:47 > 0:44:48- I'm fine.- OK.

0:45:04 > 0:45:06Jay and Hazel's baby is also in distress.

0:45:06 > 0:45:09The baby's heart rate has dropped,

0:45:09 > 0:45:11so it's being closely monitored by a doctor.

0:45:11 > 0:45:14Things aren't going to plan at the minute.

0:45:15 > 0:45:18Obviously, it's Hazel going through it, so I've got to carry on,

0:45:18 > 0:45:22staying strong for her and hopefully everything'll be all right.

0:45:22 > 0:45:25So with the next couple of contractions, just go for it, yeah.

0:45:25 > 0:45:26I want you to do it yourself.

0:45:26 > 0:45:29- You're doing... - Is another one coming?- Go on, go on.

0:45:29 > 0:45:32- Go on, go on, go on, go on.- Chin on chest. Everything you've got, go on.

0:45:32 > 0:45:34- I can't!- You can.- Come on, you can do this. Come on.- You can do it.

0:45:34 > 0:45:37Jay is helping her to push through the pain.

0:45:37 > 0:45:40- Go on.- Keep it going, keep it going, keep it going.

0:45:41 > 0:45:44- Perfect.- Well done, perfect.- Go on.

0:45:44 > 0:45:45Keep going...

0:45:47 > 0:45:50Excellent. That's it.

0:45:50 > 0:45:53- I can see loads of dark hair. - Yeah.- Go on, keep pushing.

0:45:55 > 0:45:57HAZEL SQUEALS (Go on.)

0:45:57 > 0:46:00- Oh!- Calm, relax.

0:46:02 > 0:46:05- I can feel him, though! - I know, just relax.

0:46:05 > 0:46:08HAZEL GROANS Hazel, relax.

0:46:10 > 0:46:12- I'm knackered!- I know you are. - I know you are.

0:46:12 > 0:46:15- I'm sorry, I just want him out! - I know...- He's absolutely fine.

0:46:15 > 0:46:18You keep pushing, the next two pushes he'll be out, OK?

0:46:18 > 0:46:21- Just go for it...- Go on.- ..when you have the contractions, all right?

0:46:21 > 0:46:24- MIDWIFE:- Keep it going, keep going. - Go on...- Keep going.

0:46:24 > 0:46:25That's it, go.

0:46:26 > 0:46:28Keep pushing, keep pushing.

0:46:28 > 0:46:30That's it, that's it, that's it!

0:46:30 > 0:46:32- And again, go on.- Keep pushing. - Go on. That's it.

0:46:32 > 0:46:34Keep pushing. Harder.

0:46:35 > 0:46:37That's it. Well done, Hazel.

0:46:37 > 0:46:40- MIDWIFE:- Go on, don't shy away, don't shy away, you're doing great.

0:46:40 > 0:46:43- You're doing really well, excellent. Go on.- Go on.

0:46:43 > 0:46:45- Well done, perfect.- Go on.

0:46:45 > 0:46:46Keep going...

0:46:49 > 0:46:50Excellent. Keep pushing...

0:46:53 > 0:46:56HAZEL PANTS AND GROANS

0:46:57 > 0:47:01Despite all of Hazel's pushing, the baby's refusing to budge.

0:47:01 > 0:47:04Just being a little bit of monkey, this one.

0:47:04 > 0:47:05That's lidocaine, yep.

0:47:05 > 0:47:08The doctor decides to use a ventouse,

0:47:08 > 0:47:11a vacuum device to assist the birth.

0:47:11 > 0:47:13Hazel, what we do is just put a cup on the baby's head,

0:47:13 > 0:47:16and as you're pushing her, just give a gentle pull.

0:47:16 > 0:47:18Hopefully, within a pull, baby should be out.

0:47:18 > 0:47:20We may sometimes need a give a cut down below just to help to

0:47:20 > 0:47:23deliver the baby. Are you OK with that, yeah?

0:47:23 > 0:47:26I'll give you some local anaesthetic just to numb that

0:47:26 > 0:47:27and then we'll do the delivery, OK?

0:47:31 > 0:47:33You're doing really well, it's just there,

0:47:33 > 0:47:36and the position will help you as well, OK?

0:47:37 > 0:47:39Go on, push away.

0:47:39 > 0:47:40- Go on, Haze.- Push.

0:47:40 > 0:47:42HAZEL GROANS

0:47:42 > 0:47:46- Will they be out, the first pull? - Yeah, maybe. Hopefully, yeah.

0:47:46 > 0:47:49But you still gotta do the work. The doctor's only giving you a bit of a hand...

0:47:49 > 0:47:5390% of the job is yours, I'm just helping guide the baby, OK.

0:47:53 > 0:47:55- Go on.- That's it well done, well done.

0:47:55 > 0:47:58You're doing really well, OK. OK, just pant, Hazel.

0:47:58 > 0:48:02Blow, blow, blow, blow, blow, blow, blow, blow, blow, blow, blow.

0:48:02 > 0:48:04- Go on, that's it. - Hard as you can, hard as you can.

0:48:04 > 0:48:07HAZEL SCREAMS

0:48:07 > 0:48:10Jay's anxiety about blood is being tested,

0:48:10 > 0:48:14but it's overshadowed by his concerns for Hazel.

0:48:15 > 0:48:16- Go on.- That's it.

0:48:16 > 0:48:19HAZEL GROANS AND SHOUTS

0:48:19 > 0:48:22- Push, come on.- Rest your bottom. Rest your bottom down.

0:48:22 > 0:48:24- It's all right.- Do I need to push?

0:48:24 > 0:48:27- Yeah, go on, well done. - Yeah, go on. Go.

0:48:27 > 0:48:30- Go.- That's it. OK, baby's head is out.

0:48:31 > 0:48:33HAZEL PANTS

0:48:33 > 0:48:36- MIDWIFE:- OK, push. - Go on.- That's good, well done.

0:48:36 > 0:48:38HAZEL GROANS

0:48:43 > 0:48:44That's it.

0:48:45 > 0:48:47Well done.

0:48:47 > 0:48:48HAZEL CRIES OUT

0:48:53 > 0:48:55Nearly there, nearly there...

0:48:55 > 0:48:57HAZEL SCREAMS

0:48:57 > 0:48:59- There he is.- Oh, fuck!

0:48:59 > 0:49:00Oh!

0:49:00 > 0:49:03Oh! Oh! Oh, my God!

0:49:03 > 0:49:07- Dad, do you want to cut the cord? - Yeah, please. MIDWIFE:- Hello!

0:49:07 > 0:49:09HAZEL MOANS

0:49:09 > 0:49:14Jay has faced his fears and is even managing to cut the cord.

0:49:16 > 0:49:17Give me a kiss.

0:49:17 > 0:49:20So that's time of birth, 20 past.

0:49:20 > 0:49:23- There we go.- Thanks.

0:49:24 > 0:49:27- Well, she did all the work! - I know, I'll give her a kiss first.

0:49:29 > 0:49:31- MIDWIFE:- Well done, you. You did it. - There he is.

0:49:31 > 0:49:33- HAZEL:- Aw-w!

0:49:33 > 0:49:35- MIDWIFE:- Happy birthday, baby.

0:49:35 > 0:49:37Oh, you're going to go to Daddy soon!

0:49:37 > 0:49:39Put him that way.

0:49:41 > 0:49:44Jay is now father to a healthy baby boy

0:49:44 > 0:49:48weighing in at over 8lb, and he supported Hazel all the way.

0:49:48 > 0:49:51'If I hadn't have done this, then, er...'

0:49:51 > 0:49:54I'd have probably been absolutely hopeless.

0:49:54 > 0:49:56I wouldn't have known what to expect,

0:49:56 > 0:49:58what I shouldn't be doing...

0:49:58 > 0:50:00where I should be stood, whatever, so...

0:50:01 > 0:50:03'So, yeah, it has been really useful.

0:50:03 > 0:50:06'You're not thinking about the blood or whatever,

0:50:06 > 0:50:09'you're just interested in what your partner's doing or whatever.

0:50:09 > 0:50:12'You know, it's daft.'

0:50:12 > 0:50:16Looking back now, it's daft... thinking about it.

0:50:19 > 0:50:23I think it's by far the best thing that I've ever...

0:50:24 > 0:50:25..ever done.

0:50:27 > 0:50:29Jay might be able to relax,

0:50:29 > 0:50:33but the pressure's on for James as he joins Amber in theatre.

0:50:33 > 0:50:35A C-section has been ruled out

0:50:35 > 0:50:38but the doctors will make an incision and use forceps

0:50:38 > 0:50:40to deliver the baby instead.

0:50:43 > 0:50:47Amber, the doctor's just examining you to see where baby is

0:50:47 > 0:50:49position-wise, all right?

0:50:52 > 0:50:54James needs to put his own worries to one side

0:50:54 > 0:50:56and stay strong for Amber.

0:51:00 > 0:51:03It's coming, OK, so really push for the next time, all right?

0:51:03 > 0:51:05You're doing very well.

0:51:05 > 0:51:09Go on, really... Like you're having a big shit. Go, go, go, go, go, go.

0:51:09 > 0:51:12- Keep pushing, Amber. - Keep going, keep going, keep going.

0:51:12 > 0:51:14That's baby's head coming. Well done.

0:51:15 > 0:51:18With James being able to see what's going on,

0:51:18 > 0:51:22he's able to communicate clearly and calmly with Amber.

0:51:22 > 0:51:23Baby's coming, Amber.

0:51:24 > 0:51:28- Does he have hair?- He has hair. - He has hair.- Lots of hair.

0:51:31 > 0:51:33All right, Amber, contraction's there, big push.

0:51:33 > 0:51:36Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go. Come on, babe.

0:51:36 > 0:51:38- Really big push.- Come on.

0:51:38 > 0:51:39Push into your bottom.

0:51:40 > 0:51:42Go on.

0:51:43 > 0:51:45Go on, babe. Go on.

0:51:45 > 0:51:48- Well done.- Go on. Keep going, keep going.

0:52:09 > 0:52:11- How incredible is that?! - I can't believe it.

0:52:27 > 0:52:29If it hasn't got... If he doesn't have my nose,

0:52:29 > 0:52:33then Amber owes me 100 quid. If he's got my nose, I owe Amber 100 quid.

0:52:33 > 0:52:35Say hello to your mummy...

0:52:36 > 0:52:38..because you are just gorgeous.

0:52:39 > 0:52:42James has become the proud father to a baby boy.

0:52:42 > 0:52:47He's managed to stay calm under pressure and not put his foot in it.

0:52:47 > 0:52:50I'm well pleased. Yeah. He did it.

0:52:50 > 0:52:51Hello, little man.

0:52:51 > 0:52:54'James' face showed everything, didn't it? "I'm a dad."'

0:52:54 > 0:52:56It was lovely. Moving.

0:52:56 > 0:52:58Makes my throat go tight again.

0:53:00 > 0:53:03And for someone who struggled to say the right thing,

0:53:03 > 0:53:05now James knows exactly what to say.

0:53:05 > 0:53:07BABY CRIES

0:53:07 > 0:53:09Oh, that's all right, don't cry.

0:53:10 > 0:53:12Daddy loves you.

0:53:15 > 0:53:19Both Jay and James have overcome huge challenges to become

0:53:19 > 0:53:23perfect birthing partners and the hands-on dads they wanted to be.

0:53:23 > 0:53:25Jay did absolutely brilliantly.

0:53:26 > 0:53:29I couldn't have asked for a better partner.

0:53:29 > 0:53:33This process really helped, I think.

0:53:33 > 0:53:36I'm so glad it was me and not Hazel's...Hazel's mum, you know.

0:53:36 > 0:53:39James was amazing. I'm so proud of him.

0:53:40 > 0:53:43He was really good, bless him.

0:53:43 > 0:53:47# All my life I've been

0:53:47 > 0:53:50# I've been waiting for someone like you, yeah... #

0:53:50 > 0:53:52The sessions definitely helped keep me calm.

0:53:52 > 0:53:56Even though I may have been panicking and upset,

0:53:56 > 0:53:59not to show it to Amber and keep her calm.

0:53:59 > 0:54:01So, definitely worth it.

0:54:01 > 0:54:06I don't think I've got words to describe what it feels to be a dad.

0:54:06 > 0:54:09It's the best...thing ever.

0:54:09 > 0:54:12Come here, chuckle. Oliver.

0:54:12 > 0:54:14Six weeks after the birth of son Oliver,

0:54:14 > 0:54:17there have been big changes for James.

0:54:20 > 0:54:23The midwife sessions have helped James loads.

0:54:23 > 0:54:27'He doesn't get so stressed easy now

0:54:27 > 0:54:30'and he doesn't wind me up as much either, so it's really nice.'

0:54:30 > 0:54:32Daddy needs this leg, mate, thank you.

0:54:33 > 0:54:36I love being a dad, like, it didn't hit me straightaway.

0:54:36 > 0:54:40'It was kinda a week later it hit me,

0:54:40 > 0:54:42'and it was such a surreal feeling.'

0:54:42 > 0:54:44I wouldn't change it for the world.

0:54:47 > 0:54:50BABY BURPS Ooh, that's nice(!)

0:54:50 > 0:54:51First thing you say.

0:54:51 > 0:54:56And in Stockport, Jay has taken to fatherhood like a natural.

0:54:57 > 0:54:59I think the first time I saw Lewis I'll remember, um...

0:55:00 > 0:55:02..for the rest of me life.

0:55:03 > 0:55:05I'm really proud of Jay.

0:55:05 > 0:55:08He was absolutely brilliant when we came back from the hospital.

0:55:08 > 0:55:10He looked after Lewis,

0:55:10 > 0:55:14he cleaned the house, did all the dishes, did all the washing -

0:55:14 > 0:55:17he was brilliant - and looked after me as well as Lewis,

0:55:17 > 0:55:20'so I'm really proud of him and he's done an excellent job.'

0:55:20 > 0:55:24The old mother-in-law cardboard cut-out will probably have

0:55:24 > 0:55:26a ceremonial burning in the back garden

0:55:26 > 0:55:28or I might get the nun-chucks out.

0:55:29 > 0:55:31Only kidding. HE LAUGHS

0:55:31 > 0:55:36Next time on their mission to become the perfect birthing partners,

0:55:36 > 0:55:40will Royal Marine Martin be ready for action in the delivery room...

0:55:40 > 0:55:43- Martin!- Argh! This is harder than it looks.

0:55:43 > 0:55:45Do you think it's easy for her having a baby?

0:55:45 > 0:55:47Any harder than this.

0:55:47 > 0:55:50..and can teenager Gary overcome his squeamishness

0:55:50 > 0:55:52and grow up in time to be a dad?

0:55:52 > 0:55:55Baby's sucking milk out of your boobs.

0:55:55 > 0:55:56It's wrong.

0:55:56 > 0:55:58It's definitely time my man manned up.

0:56:01 > 0:56:07# And I don't even know how I survive

0:56:07 > 0:56:14# I won't make it down the road with one headlight

0:56:14 > 0:56:20# No, I don't even know if I'm alive

0:56:20 > 0:56:26# O-o-o-oh, without you now this is what it feels like. #