0:00:02 > 0:00:06This programme contains strong language.
0:00:06 > 0:00:09North of the city centre is a Manchester suburb called Harpurhey.
0:00:09 > 0:00:13They say the area's just full of rough families. I don't think it's such a bad place.
0:00:13 > 0:00:17Ten years ago, a government report branded it the most deprived neighbourhood in England.
0:00:17 > 0:00:20- It's a simple question I asked. - Yeah, and I'm trying to answer it.
0:00:20 > 0:00:22Things have got a bit better since then,
0:00:22 > 0:00:25but life round here is still no bed of roses.
0:00:25 > 0:00:28There's a local saying, "They'd steal the shit out of your arse."
0:00:28 > 0:00:31Not cos they want it, just so you haven't got it.
0:00:31 > 0:00:33Half the people have no qualifications.
0:00:33 > 0:00:34You!
0:00:34 > 0:00:37And antisocial behaviour is rife.
0:00:37 > 0:00:39- Are you the neighbour from hell? - Probably, yeah.
0:00:39 > 0:00:44People round here might not be the poshest but they're not lacking in spirit.
0:00:44 > 0:00:46We call ourselves The Dysfunctionals.
0:00:46 > 0:00:49They're just trying to get on with life. Be themselves.
0:00:49 > 0:00:52I ain't driving the van like this.
0:00:52 > 0:00:54And follow their dreams.
0:00:54 > 0:00:56I'm a different person when I'm acting.
0:00:56 > 0:01:00Tis true that a good play needs no epilogue. SHE WHISTLES
0:01:00 > 0:01:04For one long summer, the young people of Harpurhey let us into their secret world.
0:01:04 > 0:01:07# I have a penis! I shake it in the morning #
0:01:07 > 0:01:10- Sharing the good times. - Megan Fox, eat your heart out.
0:01:10 > 0:01:15- And the bad.- Hello! Go and find another street to go and terrorise.
0:01:15 > 0:01:18This is how it really feels growing up the hard way.
0:01:18 > 0:01:20You might think you know people like us
0:01:20 > 0:01:22but you don't know nothing yet!
0:01:31 > 0:01:33This week, nine newborn puppies
0:01:33 > 0:01:36strain relationships in the Wakefield family.
0:01:36 > 0:01:41- And dad Paul walks out. - He's got to come home today.
0:01:41 > 0:01:45My favourite saying to her now is, "Kaz, are these yours?"
0:01:45 > 0:01:49Landlord Nik and tenant Pidge face off in an eviction battle.
0:01:52 > 0:01:54And mates Arroll and Patrick
0:01:54 > 0:01:58prepare for their first holiday abroad together.
0:01:58 > 0:02:00My idea of a good holiday is getting tanned all day
0:02:00 > 0:02:03with carrot oil dripping off your tits.
0:02:15 > 0:02:19The Wishy Washy launderette has been run by Amber and Maddy's parents,
0:02:19 > 0:02:21Karen and Paul, for the past six years.
0:02:25 > 0:02:29Paul's my stepdad, but he has been there since I was very young.
0:02:29 > 0:02:32He's always cleaning the machines out, folding the clothes,
0:02:32 > 0:02:35putting the washing in. He's always busy. SHE LAUGHS
0:02:35 > 0:02:38Amber's mum Karen has a problem with her back,
0:02:38 > 0:02:40so she can't work in the launderette.
0:02:40 > 0:02:43That doesn't stop her overseeing operations.
0:02:43 > 0:02:47- That could be a load of ball-bag fluff. - SHE LAUGHS
0:02:48 > 0:02:51You're messing with somebody's foreskin. I bet there's loads.
0:02:51 > 0:02:54You don't know what you're touching.
0:02:54 > 0:02:57Do you want to shut up? I'm the one that's stuck here.
0:02:57 > 0:03:00- Could be sniffing up somebody's pubic hair. - SHE LAUGHS
0:03:02 > 0:03:03Sorry.
0:03:07 > 0:03:11Karen and Paul spend all day together at work and at home.
0:03:11 > 0:03:14For Paul, there's no escaping the women in his life.
0:03:14 > 0:03:16You need some of this on.
0:03:18 > 0:03:24He gets stressed cos he lives in the house with three women, but he also lives with the Wakefield women.
0:03:24 > 0:03:27Even the dog at one point was a girl.
0:03:27 > 0:03:31So he had to get a male dog just to keep him company.
0:03:31 > 0:03:34Are you getting dressed?
0:03:35 > 0:03:38- I am now. - Make some noise so I can hear you.
0:03:38 > 0:03:43There's three girls, and every one of them do my head in.
0:03:43 > 0:03:46They do it purposely. They're always trying to pick out things,
0:03:46 > 0:03:48you know, just to nag at me about.
0:03:48 > 0:03:51Get down. Get down now.
0:03:52 > 0:03:54Ooh, god!
0:03:55 > 0:03:57What's wrong with you now, Psycho Sid?
0:03:57 > 0:04:00And you, I've just emptied that ashtray.
0:04:00 > 0:04:04You're in my house, my living room, smoking me house to death. Go down.
0:04:04 > 0:04:05Move it!
0:04:06 > 0:04:09You're the reason why we're always decorating.
0:04:09 > 0:04:12- Your bad, bad smoking habit. - Oh, come on!
0:04:12 > 0:04:15Shut up!
0:04:15 > 0:04:18They're always arguing.
0:04:18 > 0:04:20There's full-on arguing every couple of months.
0:04:20 > 0:04:24Then they're always bickering, it's just always moaning.
0:04:24 > 0:04:25SHE BANGS ON WINDOW
0:04:25 > 0:04:27The washing.
0:04:27 > 0:04:29Hey, I tell you now, lad,
0:04:29 > 0:04:33sort your bloody moods out else you're not coming to work.
0:04:41 > 0:04:44Half a mile down the road lives Paul.
0:04:44 > 0:04:47Known to his mates as Pidge.
0:04:47 > 0:04:49He's recently moved out of his mum's house
0:04:49 > 0:04:52and is living on his own for the first time.
0:04:52 > 0:04:54In the five-bedroom shared house,
0:04:54 > 0:04:58Pidge rents his own room, which he decorated himself.
0:04:58 > 0:05:04This is the only room in the house where I've been in actually, I think.
0:05:04 > 0:05:06Er, this is where I just come to spark
0:05:06 > 0:05:09and keep me way out the rest of the house.
0:05:09 > 0:05:14£65 a week I pay for this. This room, basically.
0:05:14 > 0:05:18There's water comes through me fire alarm, water comes through me fire alarm.
0:05:20 > 0:05:25Unemployed Pidge trained as a chef, but he's barely ventured into the shared kitchen yet.
0:05:25 > 0:05:28This is a death kitchen.
0:05:28 > 0:05:31I wouldn't attempt to cook in here.
0:05:31 > 0:05:34Not at all. I'll go to me sister's on Brentford Street.
0:05:34 > 0:05:37Or me mum's. I'm not at all cooking in this.
0:05:37 > 0:05:41Wouldn't touch this kitchen even if someone paid me to.
0:05:44 > 0:05:46After only eight weeks in the house,
0:05:46 > 0:05:51Pidge's landlord is trying to evict him following complaints about loud parties.
0:05:51 > 0:05:53To register his disapproval,
0:05:53 > 0:05:56Pidge has staged a dirty protest.
0:05:56 > 0:06:00This is the garden. I brought everything out of the back garden what I cleaned up,
0:06:00 > 0:06:05which he was meant to have got a skip for a month ago. This would've all been moved.
0:06:05 > 0:06:09I put it all back cos he's being a twat with me.
0:06:09 > 0:06:12I'm just giving him a bit back himself.
0:06:12 > 0:06:15What it is, is against me. I've been arrested
0:06:15 > 0:06:20seven times since I've lived here and I've only lived here eight weeks.
0:06:20 > 0:06:23I've lived here eight weeks and I've been arrested seven times.
0:06:23 > 0:06:26They arrest me for stuff I've not done.
0:06:26 > 0:06:33In a back bedroom a previous tenant's dog has left a mess for the landlord to clean up, too
0:06:33 > 0:06:39And then there's the landlord. There he is, sat next to his nappy.
0:06:39 > 0:06:41Horrible bastard.
0:06:44 > 0:06:47Pidge's house is owned by Nik Taylor,
0:06:47 > 0:06:51a private landlord who owns 15 houses in Manchester.
0:06:54 > 0:06:56There's nine houses on the street,
0:06:56 > 0:07:00they're all mine except for number two, which is up for sale.
0:07:00 > 0:07:05I tried buying it a few years ago, then they stopped doing mortgages for a bit.
0:07:12 > 0:07:16Nik owns houses in London but he started buying property in Harpurhey
0:07:16 > 0:07:19almost ten years ago because of the low prices.
0:07:19 > 0:07:24He's targeted tenants who claim local housing allowance to cover their rent.
0:07:26 > 0:07:31The two well-known local expressions is about people haven't got shit for brains
0:07:31 > 0:07:36And the other one is about what they steal, they say,
0:07:36 > 0:07:39"Oh, people would steal the snot out of your nose."
0:07:39 > 0:07:43The other one is, they say, "They'd steal the shit out of your arse."
0:07:43 > 0:07:48Not cos they want it, just so that you haven't got it. It's no good to them.
0:07:48 > 0:07:51Nik served an eviction notice on his most difficult tenant.
0:07:51 > 0:07:55But Pidge is staying put and will wait until the case comes to court.
0:07:55 > 0:07:59I shall not move. I'm going to go to the Citizen's Advice Bureau.
0:07:59 > 0:08:01They've already told me not to move.
0:08:01 > 0:08:05They told me straight to me face, do not move, said just stay there.
0:08:05 > 0:08:10They can't kick you out. He's got to get you in court. I'm just going to wait for a court date.
0:08:10 > 0:08:12I shall not be moved till me court date.
0:08:12 > 0:08:15It'll cost him money, but I'll do it that way,
0:08:15 > 0:08:16I'm not going to move out.
0:08:16 > 0:08:20Play him at his own game, ten times better.
0:08:20 > 0:08:22MUSIC: "Super Bass" by Nicki Minaj
0:08:28 > 0:08:31Well, I can't even see what I'm doing.
0:08:31 > 0:08:34Oh! Turn it down now. You know what I'm like about noise.
0:08:34 > 0:08:37Do not care. # At ill He real, he might gotta deal
0:08:37 > 0:08:39# He pop bottles and he got the right kind of bill
0:08:39 > 0:08:41# He cold, he dope He might sell coke #
0:08:41 > 0:08:45- Let's have some chocolate. - No!- Stop it.
0:08:45 > 0:08:47Maddy, have you got CJ?
0:08:47 > 0:08:49YAPPING
0:08:49 > 0:08:54Up the road from Pidge's, the Wakefields have had some unexpected new arrivals in their family.
0:08:54 > 0:08:58Three weeks ago, their two boxers, Crystal and Casper,
0:08:58 > 0:09:00had nine puppies.
0:09:00 > 0:09:04Paul's in charge of looking after them until they can be found new homes.
0:09:06 > 0:09:09- I will miss the puppies. - I won't miss the smell.
0:09:09 > 0:09:11I hope you get me something for my birthday.
0:09:12 > 0:09:15Er, no, don't even think about it.
0:09:15 > 0:09:19I'm serious. we're not getting one. There will be no puppy in a box.
0:09:19 > 0:09:22No. I bet you seriously think there's going to be one.
0:09:22 > 0:09:25I swear on my life, no, no puppy in a box.
0:09:25 > 0:09:29Not even without a box. No puppy. We've got two dogs, I'm not having three.
0:09:29 > 0:09:33- Oh.- It's all right for you, it's your dad who does everything.
0:09:33 > 0:09:36- I want Fluffy!- No.
0:09:41 > 0:09:46The smell was horrific. We had about 50 air fresheners on the windowsill.
0:09:46 > 0:09:51One of them jumped on me leg and, because I tried to get it off,
0:09:51 > 0:09:56its teeth dug right down my leg and ripped the whole of my pants off.
0:09:56 > 0:10:01I was up to me knees in shit. I never smelt anything like it.
0:10:01 > 0:10:04Maddy's making the most of her time with her new friends.
0:10:04 > 0:10:09When did you grow teeth? Oi! Answer my question, when did you grow teeth?
0:10:09 > 0:10:13Answer it. Don't look guilty.
0:10:13 > 0:10:15Eh! Ow! Me nose.
0:10:15 > 0:10:21But, with no buyers for the puppies on the horizon, Paul's workload shows no sign of letting up.
0:10:29 > 0:10:32Hairdresser Arroll and call-centre worker Patrick
0:10:32 > 0:10:37have been best mates for a year and bonded over their shared love of beauty treatments.
0:10:37 > 0:10:38HE LAUGHS
0:10:38 > 0:10:43Eyebrows, lashes, spray tan, Wow Brows, facials, pedicures, manicures.
0:10:43 > 0:10:47- Teeth whitening.- Teeth whitening. Hair cut.- Contact lenses. - Contact lenses.
0:10:47 > 0:10:50Basically, I'm just fake as fuck.
0:10:50 > 0:10:53We bounce off each other. That was the reason we clicked.
0:10:53 > 0:10:55He's got a similar sense of humour as me.
0:10:55 > 0:10:58He says something, then I'll pick up on what he means.
0:10:58 > 0:11:01Then I can bounce off him and he can bounce off me.
0:11:01 > 0:11:04Before you know, we're rolling round in stitches, laughing.
0:11:04 > 0:11:09Can't believe I'm talking to you when I look like this with one of these on. Look like me nana.
0:11:09 > 0:11:12The boys are planning their first holiday together,
0:11:12 > 0:11:16a boozy package trip to Greece with ten mates.
0:11:16 > 0:11:18I can't wait to go, we'll have such a good time.
0:11:18 > 0:11:23I can't wait. I've not been for ten years. I've got me passport in me pocket, ready.
0:11:23 > 0:11:25Come back all brown, then you'll be like...
0:11:25 > 0:11:29I'll be blacker, cos I would have had a course at Fast Tan and a spray tan.
0:11:29 > 0:11:32- Burn-on tan sprays. - And tanning injections.
0:11:32 > 0:11:34- And carrot juice.- And bronzer.
0:11:34 > 0:11:40- You'll look like Dale Winton on crack.- St Moritz.- 99p a litre, B&M.
0:11:40 > 0:11:43- B&M bargains!- Can't beat it.
0:11:43 > 0:11:45From Cameron Diaz to Jay-Z in three seconds.
0:11:45 > 0:11:47HE LAUGHS
0:11:47 > 0:11:52When me and Arroll are talking, we talk that fast, people look at us and like they go...
0:11:52 > 0:11:56"We don't understand that." We speak really fast.
0:11:56 > 0:11:59- Shrek and Fiona.- Ah.- You love it!
0:11:59 > 0:12:02When I'm with him, I sometimes think, "Whoa, we need to calm down."
0:12:02 > 0:12:06It's like we took three ounces of whizz and gone, "Bluh-bluh-bluh."
0:12:06 > 0:12:11- I'm so relaxed, I feel all jellified. Do you?- You idiot.
0:12:20 > 0:12:24Arroll's full-time job at a hair salon north of Harpurhey
0:12:24 > 0:12:27means he's short on time to get into shape before Kavos.
0:12:27 > 0:12:31Ideally, get the body of a god, and I don't mean Buddha.
0:12:31 > 0:12:33I've got that now, the Buddha belly.
0:12:33 > 0:12:38So I'm on protein shakes, skipping, gym.
0:12:38 > 0:12:42Swear I might as well just start sleeping in clingfilm, hadn't I?
0:12:42 > 0:12:45Wrap it round me, bin bags and clingfilm.
0:12:45 > 0:12:47Can't wait!
0:12:47 > 0:12:50It's going to just be a hardcore partying holiday.
0:12:50 > 0:12:52So it's going to be wake up,
0:12:52 > 0:12:56reach for the nearest pint, ain't it, really?
0:12:56 > 0:12:59My plan is not to let myself come down.
0:12:59 > 0:13:02Once I start feeling ill, that'll be it then.
0:13:02 > 0:13:08So my plan is just to carry on and get as drunk and as rotten as I possibly can for the whole week.
0:13:08 > 0:13:10Then come down when I... when I'm on me way home.
0:13:11 > 0:13:16- Look at him, denim, denim and denim. - Denim and denim, you look so sexy.
0:13:16 > 0:13:21Patrick's popped into town to get in some drinking practice with mates who are also going to Kavos.
0:13:21 > 0:13:25- Here's to six days till Chavos. - Six days!- Chavos!
0:13:25 > 0:13:28Seven days of pure filthy drinking.
0:13:28 > 0:13:34- We should do a booze cruise this year.- Definitely do a booze cruise. Just want to get there now.
0:13:34 > 0:13:38I'm getting me eyebrows and hair done. I'm not getting a spray tan.
0:13:38 > 0:13:43Once I've checked in, it's, right, get me the fucking vodka, neck it in Duty Free.
0:13:48 > 0:13:51Harpurhey is one of the highest crime areas in Manchester,
0:13:51 > 0:13:54with antisocial behaviour and burglary
0:13:54 > 0:13:56two of the most common offences.
0:13:56 > 0:14:01The area is policed by 43 officers, who operate out of a police station
0:14:01 > 0:14:03in the heart of Harpurhey.
0:14:07 > 0:14:09Damage to a gate at 462 Rochdale Road.
0:14:09 > 0:14:12Jim, will you be able to pick that one up?
0:14:12 > 0:14:14Yeah, I'll have a look at that this morning.
0:14:14 > 0:14:2124-year-old PC Jim Evans has been working the Harpurhey beat for two and a half years.
0:14:21 > 0:14:24If anyone's mooching up and down Moston Lane as well.
0:14:24 > 0:14:28- A couple of nights ago, I spoke to Karen at Wishy Washy. - Yeah.- The launderette.
0:14:28 > 0:14:32She's been having problems with a restaurant over the road.
0:14:32 > 0:14:36Blokes are coming outside and just urinating on the street.
0:14:36 > 0:14:39They even took a slash up her car while she was in it before.
0:14:39 > 0:14:40Practically speaking,
0:14:40 > 0:14:44I'd issue the fine once they've put their tackle away, though.
0:14:44 > 0:14:46- Yeah.- Just for health and safety purposes.
0:14:46 > 0:14:48They've got to sign as well.
0:14:48 > 0:14:53They've got to sign and if they've got one hand otherwise engaged
0:14:53 > 0:14:55I wanted to be a fighter pilot when I were a kid.
0:14:55 > 0:14:59I never really thought about the police until I was a bit older.
0:14:59 > 0:15:03I was working in a call centre and thought, "It's got to get better than this."
0:15:03 > 0:15:07Anything else happened? Anything else we need to be aware of?
0:15:07 > 0:15:09Nothing involving us, no.
0:15:09 > 0:15:11SIREN WAILS
0:15:11 > 0:15:14# Cos it's a beautiful day! #
0:15:14 > 0:15:18In my opinion, it's one of the best jobs out there.
0:15:18 > 0:15:22The more you get to know the area, the more you enjoy working it.
0:15:22 > 0:15:24There's something different going on every day,
0:15:24 > 0:15:26there's something new all the time.
0:15:26 > 0:15:28It's another day in paradise.
0:15:30 > 0:15:33Should be the Harpurhey theme song.
0:15:33 > 0:15:34Everybody out there
0:15:34 > 0:15:40who wants to offend and commit crime on the Harpurhey area, don't!
0:15:40 > 0:15:42Because we're coming to get you.
0:15:42 > 0:15:43# I'm sexy and I know it
0:15:49 > 0:15:51# I'm sexy and I know it. #
0:15:51 > 0:15:54- Who's going first, me?- Me!- Thanks.
0:15:54 > 0:15:58To complete their holiday look, Arroll and Patrick have booked in
0:15:58 > 0:16:01for the ultimate in plucked and waxed eyebrow perfection.
0:16:01 > 0:16:03The Wow Brow!
0:16:03 > 0:16:05It's definitely a gay thing. Actually, it's not.
0:16:05 > 0:16:09These days, people round here... It's just grooming, innit, really?
0:16:09 > 0:16:13- Grooming yourself. What's that word? - Metrosexual.- Metrosexual men do it.
0:16:13 > 0:16:17But you find that gay people have theirs more shaped and more...
0:16:17 > 0:16:21I'm having Megan Fox eyebrows, me. Think Megan Fox, Transformers, done.
0:16:21 > 0:16:24Think Beyonce, Sasha Fierce, Queen B. Thank you.
0:16:29 > 0:16:34I've got a friend who works at another salon. She said, "They do Wow Brows at your salon."
0:16:34 > 0:16:37I was like, "Yeah." She was like, "We had HD brows, they was crap"
0:16:37 > 0:16:42We was like, "Well, you know what I mean, come down for a Wow Brow." But she was buzzing.
0:16:42 > 0:16:47Kate Middleton's got nice eyebrows. I reckon the Queen would look good with a Wow Brow.
0:16:47 > 0:16:51- Are they done?- Megan Fox, eat your heart out. Ooh, Megan who?
0:16:52 > 0:16:55At first, I didn't think there was a lot of gay people in the estate.
0:16:55 > 0:16:59They're popping up from nowhere, aren't they? Like, springing up.
0:16:59 > 0:17:01I'm not the only gay in our parade.
0:17:06 > 0:17:08Mm-hmm.
0:17:08 > 0:17:11I'm gay, get over it. Your dad's probably gay.
0:17:11 > 0:17:14Joke, he's not really. I don't think he is.
0:17:14 > 0:17:17They're fine. Wow Brows done.
0:17:17 > 0:17:22Yeah, they're nice and defined and thick, not dead thin like pencils.
0:17:30 > 0:17:33I just walked in.
0:17:33 > 0:17:36At the supermarket on the main Harpurhey shopping precinct,
0:17:36 > 0:17:39Jim and colleagues have been called to deal with a pair of shoplifters
0:17:39 > 0:17:42who were caught getting drunk on stolen booze.
0:17:42 > 0:17:46Policeman, check this policeman. Fucking idiot, bruv, idiot.
0:17:46 > 0:17:49- Why are you kicking off? - Move out the way.
0:17:49 > 0:17:52They're arresting one of the culprits for behaving aggressively.
0:17:52 > 0:17:57You're not helping yourself here at all. Come on, get into the van.
0:17:57 > 0:18:00- Bob.- You're walking great now, eh?- I know.
0:18:00 > 0:18:05You! Little prick. You fucking bitch. You fucking...!
0:18:05 > 0:18:08He's head-butting the cage and he's got a head injury now.
0:18:08 > 0:18:12- He's got a minor graze to his head. - Ryan, stop it!
0:18:12 > 0:18:14When someone's aggressive to that point,
0:18:14 > 0:18:16whether they're in cuffs or not,
0:18:16 > 0:18:19you can't take your eye off 'em, you don't know what will happen.
0:18:19 > 0:18:21BANGING
0:18:21 > 0:18:25- He's kicking, he's not head-butting any more.- Right.
0:18:25 > 0:18:27- We need to keep an eye on him.- Yeah.
0:18:27 > 0:18:31If you were frightened about it, then you'd never go to the jobs,
0:18:31 > 0:18:34and you couldn't be a decent police officer, really.
0:18:34 > 0:18:36After being given a slap on the wrist,
0:18:36 > 0:18:40the thief's accomplice finds himself having to report a crime of his own.
0:18:40 > 0:18:42It appears the other lad
0:18:42 > 0:18:46has had, I think he's had his bike nicked from outside Asda.
0:18:46 > 0:18:50So, it's, yeah, it's a bit of karmic justice I think, right there.
0:18:50 > 0:18:54I don't feel sorry for him. Serves him right, he shouldn't go nicking.
0:18:55 > 0:18:58Stop it, you'll hurt yourself.
0:18:58 > 0:19:00You need to sit down and calm down.
0:19:08 > 0:19:12I've lived a lot of different places around England.
0:19:12 > 0:19:15But Harpurhey's about people not working.
0:19:15 > 0:19:19Only getting out of bed quite late in the day,
0:19:19 > 0:19:22and smoking weed and going to bed really late.
0:19:22 > 0:19:26If you work, you're Polish or come from some other part of Britain to do the work.
0:19:26 > 0:19:30The locals can't work because they'd lose benefit if they did work.
0:19:30 > 0:19:32That's what the benefit culture is about.
0:19:32 > 0:19:34That's what you're paying your taxes for.
0:19:34 > 0:19:37They say it's just rough.
0:19:37 > 0:19:41They say the area's full of rough families.
0:19:41 > 0:19:45I don't think, in my point of view, that it's such a bad place.
0:19:45 > 0:19:48PATRICK: The best thing about being from round there
0:19:48 > 0:19:51is how much community spirit is there. It sounds cheesy,
0:19:51 > 0:19:54but people like to talk to people and people are really sociable.
0:19:54 > 0:19:57I think, in a weird sort of way,
0:19:57 > 0:20:00a lot of people look out for each other in Harpurhey.
0:20:00 > 0:20:03If you've not got plenty of money,
0:20:03 > 0:20:05if you've not got material things.
0:20:05 > 0:20:10A lot of people in our parade have got mates and that's,
0:20:10 > 0:20:13you need to look at it, that's got to be a good thing.
0:20:19 > 0:20:21Pidge has plenty of mates.
0:20:21 > 0:20:25While waiting for his eviction court date, he's determined to have fun.
0:20:25 > 0:20:29He's planning a big party tonight to celebrate his 21st birthday.
0:20:29 > 0:20:34Just putting it on me Facebook status. Party.
0:20:35 > 0:20:38Everyone wear no knickers and stuff.
0:20:38 > 0:20:40HE LAUGHS
0:20:40 > 0:20:44Everyone gets laid every week at my parties.
0:20:44 > 0:20:47Loud music, loads of beer,
0:20:47 > 0:20:52loads of girls, loads of guys, loads and loads, loads of drugs.
0:20:52 > 0:20:54This is the party destination.
0:20:54 > 0:20:59This is the love shack. This is the love shack, innit?
0:21:09 > 0:21:14Pidge is not the only local resident spreading the love this afternoon.
0:21:15 > 0:21:19We've just been mooching around. We turned down a side street
0:21:19 > 0:21:25And there's a car a-rocking and I don't want to go a-knocking!
0:21:27 > 0:21:29They've been up to a bit of rumpy pumpy.
0:21:29 > 0:21:30We've given it a few minutes
0:21:30 > 0:21:32cos I don't want to see that kind of thing.
0:21:35 > 0:21:38- You decent?- Yeah.
0:21:38 > 0:21:41You sure? I gave you a good five minutes, yeah?
0:21:41 > 0:21:43What you up to down here, or need I ask?
0:21:48 > 0:21:52Cornflake tart, you've come down here to eat a bit of cornflake tart?
0:21:53 > 0:21:55How come you're not in your driver's seat?
0:21:58 > 0:22:00Yeah, move on.
0:22:03 > 0:22:06Give 'em five minutes to move, shall we?
0:22:10 > 0:22:13- I don't know who's more embarrassed, them or me. - HE LAUGHS
0:22:17 > 0:22:19There's a first time for everything.
0:22:19 > 0:22:22It's like getting a new Cub Scout badge, innit?
0:22:22 > 0:22:24The caught-in-the-act badge!
0:22:35 > 0:22:40# I call myself bacon! I... #
0:22:40 > 0:22:43It's four in the afternoon at the Wakefields.
0:22:43 > 0:22:46SHE LAUGHS
0:22:46 > 0:22:48We're all mad and just crazy.
0:22:48 > 0:22:51Sometimes we can be nutters and do crazy things.
0:22:51 > 0:22:56Like when I dress up as like a cow and run around Tesco and that.
0:22:56 > 0:23:00While the girls relax upstairs, Paul's got the dogs to look after
0:23:00 > 0:23:03and now Karen's got him decorating the house.
0:23:03 > 0:23:06# Me, a name I call myself #
0:23:06 > 0:23:09# Bacon, sausage, bean and egg and a bit of buttered bread
0:23:09 > 0:23:14- # A bit of buttered bread - # I said a bit of buttered bread - # A bit of buttered bread, yeah! #
0:23:14 > 0:23:18So either got her friends staying or silly buds next door.
0:23:18 > 0:23:22It's an open house. Anybody can come in, tramps off the street, anyone.
0:23:22 > 0:23:25That's why we call ourselves The Dysfunctionals.
0:23:25 > 0:23:28Yeah, we're not like a normal family.
0:23:28 > 0:23:32It's weird cos I know you can have dead loud houses and they're all dead, you know...
0:23:32 > 0:23:35You can get really horrible scally ones.
0:23:35 > 0:23:39We're all loud but we're also all right with it, aren't we?
0:23:39 > 0:23:43CBA Day we call it, Can't Be Arsed Day!
0:23:43 > 0:23:48You know when you don't have to do anything, even though I've got that much to do it's unbelievable.
0:23:48 > 0:23:51You don't have to do anything, but Dad does!
0:23:51 > 0:23:57Paul, he works very hard, we can't, like, fault him for that.
0:23:57 > 0:24:00Once one room's been decorated, he goes into the next room.
0:24:00 > 0:24:04Then that room, what he did previously, needs doing again.
0:24:04 > 0:24:09Once he gets up to do it, I'm not going to get up and do it because he's already up doing it.
0:24:09 > 0:24:12# And a bit of buttered bread. #
0:24:12 > 0:24:14Fucking hell!
0:24:14 > 0:24:19I'm never sat down, you know. I've either got a mop stuck in one hand and a fucking bucket in the other,
0:24:19 > 0:24:23Or, you know, it's fucking horrible, I can't stand it.
0:24:23 > 0:24:24Females, fucking hell!
0:24:24 > 0:24:27Do without them for a while, know what I'm saying.
0:24:27 > 0:24:29I'd like to get the fuck out of here for a bit.
0:24:29 > 0:24:31This is a top song.
0:24:31 > 0:24:34MUSIC: "Handbags And Gladrags" by Stereophonics
0:24:34 > 0:24:36- Turn it up.- Right.
0:24:36 > 0:24:39'# Trying to make herself a bride... #'
0:24:41 > 0:24:44Do you like it?
0:24:46 > 0:24:52'# So what becomes of you my love?'
0:24:54 > 0:24:59'# When they have finally stripped you of'
0:24:59 > 0:25:02'# The handbags and the gladrags'
0:25:02 > 0:25:08'# That your poor old granddad had to sweat to buy you. #'
0:25:08 > 0:25:10Girls wear pyjamas everywhere.
0:25:10 > 0:25:15Market, bingo, Asda, er, swimming baths, anywhere.
0:25:15 > 0:25:17I'm sure people must get up, have a shower
0:25:17 > 0:25:19and then put pyjamas on to go out in.
0:25:19 > 0:25:21A sign in the doctor's said,
0:25:21 > 0:25:24- don't come in in your pyjamas or you won't be seen.- Yeah.
0:25:24 > 0:25:27Everyone kept coming in in their pyjamas. And Asda. Nobody gets dressed.
0:25:27 > 0:25:30- Then did you see...? - I'm only dressed cos I'm here.
0:25:30 > 0:25:36- And you wanted to...- Next week, I'll be in my nightgown and slippers.
0:25:46 > 0:25:47SIREN WAILS
0:25:47 > 0:25:51It's Friday night and Jim's colleagues Sheryl and Avril are on the late shift.
0:26:00 > 0:26:02Shocker!
0:26:02 > 0:26:05It is a grade one that we are going to.
0:26:05 > 0:26:09Several youths fighting and throwing bottles
0:26:09 > 0:26:13at each other and at passing vehicles.
0:26:13 > 0:26:17There are a couple of other patrols making their way there as well.
0:26:17 > 0:26:20- Ah, we got some runners. - 'Male runner on.'
0:26:20 > 0:26:23On a Friday night, it gets a bit lively, people have drinks,
0:26:23 > 0:26:26then the estate's flooded, there's people on it.
0:26:26 > 0:26:29Everyone's running from the police. I sit there and have a laugh.
0:26:29 > 0:26:33Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Slow your boots down.
0:26:33 > 0:26:37Go home, before you find yourself spending Friday night
0:26:37 > 0:26:38in a custody cell.
0:26:38 > 0:26:42When Jeremy Kyle's boring me, I just go to me bedroom window.
0:26:43 > 0:26:46Stop raising your hands up to everybody.
0:26:46 > 0:26:49Get him in for D and D. Watch his leg. Move him back, mate.
0:26:49 > 0:26:53The police are arresting a drunken youth to try and calm him down
0:26:53 > 0:26:56after his aggressive behaviour threatens to get out of hand.
0:26:56 > 0:26:59I think, for the lasses, it's Lambrini.
0:26:59 > 0:27:03For the lads, cheap, cheerful Special Brew is always popular.
0:27:03 > 0:27:07And, er, you know, your nice White Lightning, nice strong cider.
0:27:07 > 0:27:10- What have you had tonight? - Not had nothing.
0:27:10 > 0:27:12There's been some sort of to-do on the estate.
0:27:12 > 0:27:17It's finding a fine line between trying to maintain peace in the area
0:27:17 > 0:27:21and trying to look after your own safety, which can be quite difficult sometimes.
0:27:21 > 0:27:26It has been known that I have gone out in town and had a glass of wine or two in the past.
0:27:26 > 0:27:31I have never got into a fight. I do ask the question why these people constantly find themselves...
0:27:31 > 0:27:34Cos we do come across the same people time and time again...
0:27:34 > 0:27:38So I ask the question, why they are constantly in these situations?
0:27:38 > 0:27:41I don't know why. Can you offer an answer to that?
0:27:41 > 0:27:42No.
0:27:47 > 0:27:51It's 11 o'clock and half a mile up the road at Pidge's,
0:27:51 > 0:27:54his 21st birthday party is just getting going.
0:27:54 > 0:27:58Partying hardcore.
0:27:58 > 0:28:01Par-ty!
0:28:01 > 0:28:03Karl, you fucking legend.
0:28:11 > 0:28:13Sex, drugs and booze aren't for everyone
0:28:13 > 0:28:16but they're available for those who want them.
0:28:16 > 0:28:19It's not landlord Nik's idea of a good night.
0:28:19 > 0:28:22I don't do drugs.
0:28:22 > 0:28:26I normally wouldn't drink much.
0:28:26 > 0:28:29I don't need to drink in order to dance.
0:28:29 > 0:28:31When I was their age,
0:28:31 > 0:28:35I was at university doing accountancy and computing.
0:28:35 > 0:28:37I used to spend my spare time
0:28:37 > 0:28:41playing Monopoly and other board games.
0:28:42 > 0:28:46I can't really imagine hardly any of my tenants
0:28:46 > 0:28:49playing Monopoly on an English board.
0:28:49 > 0:28:53Or Irish and Swiss, which, of course, you play in three languages.
0:28:53 > 0:28:57I've played Cluedo, Risk, loads of games.
0:28:57 > 0:28:59That's, that's what we used to do when I was young.
0:28:59 > 0:29:02RAP MUSIC PLAYS
0:29:02 > 0:29:05I suppose the thing about a board game is
0:29:05 > 0:29:09that you can achieve more things than you can in real life.
0:29:09 > 0:29:14So, yeah, when you're young and you need to be writing your essays
0:29:14 > 0:29:18and passing your exams, it's a good bit of escapism.
0:29:20 > 0:29:25By 1am, the party's in full swing and shows no sign of ending soon.
0:29:26 > 0:29:28Fuck the loudness, we're partying!
0:29:28 > 0:29:30You're only 21 once, aren't you?
0:29:30 > 0:29:35You only live once. That's a quarter of my life expectancy nearly gone.
0:29:35 > 0:29:39Do you worry about what the neighbours think?
0:29:39 > 0:29:41No, fuck the neighbours.
0:29:41 > 0:29:44Fuck the neighbours.
0:29:44 > 0:29:48- Fuck the neighbours. - Yeah, fuck the neighbours.
0:29:53 > 0:29:55But the neighbours have had enough
0:29:55 > 0:29:57and landlord Nik is under pressure to evict Pidge.
0:30:03 > 0:30:05Everyone knows about the parties, innit?
0:30:05 > 0:30:10Do you know about the parties Friday? Everyone knows about them.
0:30:10 > 0:30:13This is an everyday thing. Go round there and you'll catch
0:30:13 > 0:30:17a 70-year-old woman proper partying with alcies about time.
0:30:18 > 0:30:20LOUD SINGING
0:30:27 > 0:30:30There you go.
0:30:30 > 0:30:34Round the corner at the Wakefields, the puppies are now seven weeks old
0:30:34 > 0:30:36and causing more chaos than ever.
0:30:38 > 0:30:42They're all rolling in their own pee and everything.
0:30:42 > 0:30:46Paul's losing his temper. Karen's asked him to move out and calm down.
0:30:46 > 0:30:50My dad, cos he has to do a lot of work sometimes,
0:30:50 > 0:30:53he can get in really bad moods, where we all fall out with him.
0:30:53 > 0:30:56And then we just don't want to know him.
0:30:56 > 0:31:01Paul's sleeping in the launderette, living in the launderette at the back.
0:31:01 > 0:31:07Yeah. He's got to come home today. He's got to come home.
0:31:07 > 0:31:09Paul does near the majority of everything.
0:31:09 > 0:31:13You don't realise till you threw him out how much you miss him!
0:31:13 > 0:31:17What we doing now? Putting these two in the boot and then what?
0:31:17 > 0:31:22- Are they going in the boot? - What do you think?- The boot's hanging, so they might as well.
0:31:22 > 0:31:25The puppies are due for their injections
0:31:25 > 0:31:26and, with Paul not around,
0:31:26 > 0:31:30it's up to Karen and Amber to drop them off at the local vets.
0:31:30 > 0:31:36Oh, my God! Hello. Let's get two at a time. Right.
0:31:36 > 0:31:38Or is it just one?
0:31:38 > 0:31:41When they're arguing, I'm like, "Well, just split up then,
0:31:41 > 0:31:46"leave each other, go your separate ways." But then, me and me mum said,
0:31:46 > 0:31:48if Paul goes, who's going to fix the machines?
0:31:48 > 0:31:54Then we think, who is actually going to come and fix the machines? Cos Paul does everything.
0:31:54 > 0:31:57- Get the air freshener, Amb. - Ah, it's bad, innit?
0:32:06 > 0:32:08Right in me face.
0:32:16 > 0:32:19I think we've split up more times than we've been together.
0:32:19 > 0:32:23Yeah, split up loads of times, loads.
0:32:23 > 0:32:27He used to go off, didn't know where he was, could've been dead in the gutter.
0:32:27 > 0:32:29I'm not talking go off for a day,
0:32:29 > 0:32:32he used to go for six months, things like that.
0:32:33 > 0:32:37I know Karen loves me, but we have our arguments, everybody does.
0:32:37 > 0:32:39Maybe not as often as me and Karen.
0:32:39 > 0:32:43If we was to argue and I left, she wouldn't miss me or nowt like that.
0:32:43 > 0:32:48Even though I say she loves me and that, you know, but she'd get on with her life without me.
0:32:48 > 0:32:51You know what I mean? I wouldn't be missed that much.
0:32:51 > 0:32:56I just want a normal family, like most other people have,
0:32:56 > 0:32:59you know what I mean? Decent, like, people.
0:32:59 > 0:33:04I like to think that's what I've got, you know.
0:33:04 > 0:33:06Paul was brought up by his mum and stepdad.
0:33:08 > 0:33:11My childhood, it was a load of shite. I wasn't brought up,
0:33:11 > 0:33:14you know what I mean, I was, like, dragged up, yeah.
0:33:14 > 0:33:15Beaten, know what I mean.
0:33:15 > 0:33:18I was always told I would never be anything, know what I mean.
0:33:18 > 0:33:23When I wasn't getting bullied at school, I was coming home and getting shit.
0:33:23 > 0:33:26Getting the shite beat out of me, know what I mean.
0:33:26 > 0:33:28Um...
0:33:28 > 0:33:32Battered with a piece of wood with nails in it and that sort of shit.
0:33:32 > 0:33:34That was the sort of stuff I was getting from home.
0:33:34 > 0:33:37Then, the next morning, I'd be up, go to school, like,
0:33:37 > 0:33:42and I'd be getting shit again from kids and all that stuff, you know.
0:33:42 > 0:33:45Got to about 13 and then things changed.
0:33:45 > 0:33:48Yeah, I realised, when you fight, it don't hurt, you know what I mean,
0:33:48 > 0:33:52or it don't hurt till the next day, or something like that.
0:33:52 > 0:33:55So I started holding my own, know what I mean.
0:33:55 > 0:33:56I got to like it.
0:33:56 > 0:34:00I started going round bullying the fucking bullies then.
0:34:03 > 0:34:05I want for my family
0:34:05 > 0:34:09exactly everything that was the opposite to what I had, you know.
0:34:21 > 0:34:25What you going to do to me feet? Tell me step-by-step guide to the perfect trotters.
0:34:25 > 0:34:29Anybody can have a kid, it's a biological fact.
0:34:29 > 0:34:33Anybody can have a kid. Somebody who makes a good parent,
0:34:33 > 0:34:36doesn't matter whether the child's theirs.
0:34:36 > 0:34:40If there are kids that people don't want or they've had hard lives, I'd rather affect
0:34:40 > 0:34:44a few people's lives and show them they can have a different life,
0:34:44 > 0:34:47than have my own child and show it the best of everything.
0:34:47 > 0:34:50I'd love a Chinese kid called Beau Flynn, spelt B-E-A-U.
0:34:50 > 0:34:53- B-E-A-U-tiful. - That's beautiful in French.
0:34:53 > 0:34:56I think it does. I'm sure it does.
0:34:56 > 0:34:58I'd buy it everything in the world.
0:34:58 > 0:35:00If I couldn't afford it, I'd rob someone.
0:35:00 > 0:35:02I'm joking, I wouldn't really.
0:35:02 > 0:35:07I really do want one. Not until I'm 31 or 32, but I really want one.
0:35:07 > 0:35:10You're dead in gay years, aren't you, by the time you're 30.
0:35:10 > 0:35:14When you're a teenager and they all go, "What about kids if you're gay?"
0:35:14 > 0:35:17I goes, "I'm going to have a kid, Beau Flynn, when I'm 32."
0:35:17 > 0:35:23Just stuck with me. I imagined walking round with a baby called Beau Flynn. No dad, apart from me.
0:35:23 > 0:35:25If you follow me when I'm 32,
0:35:25 > 0:35:27I'll have Beau Flynn with me. "Come on, Beau!"
0:35:27 > 0:35:31I don't know whether you'd be able to say, "I want a Chinese baby"
0:35:31 > 0:35:36- No, you can't.- You get what you're given. It's like, "Here's one out the bag, that's for you."
0:35:36 > 0:35:37Where would I get one?
0:35:48 > 0:35:53Round at Pidge's, the landlord and tenant dispute rumbles on.
0:35:53 > 0:35:56Landlord from hell.
0:35:56 > 0:36:00Pidge is still refusing to budge and landlord Nik has been told,
0:36:00 > 0:36:04unless he shifts the rubbish outside the property, he'll be fined.
0:36:07 > 0:36:13The Public Health Act 1936, to do with mice and rats.
0:36:13 > 0:36:16And so all the black bags had to be shifted.
0:36:16 > 0:36:20The job's more difficult because I've been banned from the house.
0:36:20 > 0:36:25Pidge wrote to me, saying I'm not allowed in the house or garden or front and back yards.
0:36:25 > 0:36:27You actually writ the letter yourself.
0:36:27 > 0:36:31You acted on my behalf. I didn't write the letter, you did.
0:36:31 > 0:36:36Pidge had verbally told me I wasn't allowed in the house or gardens.
0:36:36 > 0:36:40Obviously, we needed it in writing, so there was no dispute about anything.
0:36:40 > 0:36:43So I typed up letter and got him to sign it, which he did.
0:36:43 > 0:36:46Nik banned himself. He writ the letter in my name,
0:36:46 > 0:36:49put my phone number on it, my email address,
0:36:49 > 0:36:53everything mine, and then writ it out like I've writ it,
0:36:53 > 0:36:55which I hadn't, then passed it to me.
0:36:57 > 0:37:00Writ his own ban out.
0:37:00 > 0:37:02I saved Pidge quite a bit of money
0:37:02 > 0:37:07because the council have served on him, so they can...
0:37:09 > 0:37:11clear it and charge him.
0:37:14 > 0:37:16PIDGE LAUGHS
0:37:16 > 0:37:20On camera. He just fell off the top of the van.
0:37:28 > 0:37:31You know, he can't help being what he is
0:37:31 > 0:37:33and, I suppose, I can't help being what I am.
0:37:34 > 0:37:41He's fairly bad. But, I mean, the other day, Pidge kept asking me whether I thought he was dickhead.
0:37:41 > 0:37:43Kept on and on about it.
0:37:43 > 0:37:46He's obviously a bit concerned whether he is or not.
0:37:46 > 0:37:48And do you think he is a dickhead?
0:37:48 > 0:37:52I couldn't possibly comment on something like that.
0:38:01 > 0:38:03Lots of dog shit there, I think.
0:38:03 > 0:38:06Think it's probably dog shit.
0:38:06 > 0:38:09Their tenancy agreement says no dogs.
0:38:11 > 0:38:14As a landlord in Harpurhey, every day is quite different.
0:38:14 > 0:38:17You never quite know what it's going to end up like.
0:38:17 > 0:38:19OK, there was a bit of dog shit
0:38:19 > 0:38:22but a change is as good as a rest, as they say.
0:38:24 > 0:38:29Are the returns high enough to justify the amount of aggro? No, they're not really.
0:38:39 > 0:38:42It's the evening before Arroll and Patrick's holiday.
0:38:42 > 0:38:44Chavos! Hiya, babe!
0:38:44 > 0:38:47Patrick's brought round some essential last-minute packing.
0:38:47 > 0:38:50The holiday T-shirts they've just had made up.
0:38:50 > 0:38:53- Fucking hell, that's small. - That's Rosie's.
0:38:53 > 0:38:55I'm not slagging Rosie off but she's got big tits.
0:38:55 > 0:39:00- You had your hair cut?- Tomorrow. I'm doing everything tomorrow morning.
0:39:00 > 0:39:03- Fucking hell! Last-minute Lil. - I've not packed.
0:39:03 > 0:39:06I've not packed a thing. I've got a T-shirt. That's mine.
0:39:06 > 0:39:09I don't like it. Looks like a fucking tent I can camp in.
0:39:09 > 0:39:11I'm going to cut it cos it looks hanging and...
0:39:11 > 0:39:15- Oh, don't!- Funny as fuck! - I love it.- It's funny, innit?
0:39:15 > 0:39:18- Balls in a jar! - Balls in a jar, Mrs Fucking Cropper.
0:39:18 > 0:39:20- Hayley Cropper.- Doing it big.
0:39:20 > 0:39:22That's not your hand luggage!
0:39:22 > 0:39:26- No, that's my luggage altogether, love.- Is it? In that bag?- Yeah.
0:39:26 > 0:39:28- I can't wait to go on holiday now. - I know.
0:39:28 > 0:39:35- I need a fucking shave. I need to buy deodorant, hair spray, razor blades, Femfresh.- Femfresh? Ugh, you rotter.
0:39:35 > 0:39:39- Thingy, what's it called?- Nair. - Veet for this fucking Greek back.
0:39:39 > 0:39:44- You never know, I might find a Greek back out there.- I've had me chest waxed.- You've done it!
0:39:44 > 0:39:46All three hairs waxed off it.
0:39:46 > 0:39:50My idea of a good holiday is getting tanned all day with carrot oil dripping off your tits.
0:39:50 > 0:39:55- Going out that night, drinking... - Fuck off!- ..till you're sick all over the floor.
0:39:55 > 0:39:59Wake up in the morning and say, "How did I get home?" not knowing.
0:39:59 > 0:40:03Probably waking with no clothes on, waking up with a man who you don't even know.
0:40:03 > 0:40:07- You better turn it in. You better turn it in. - I'm only joking. I'm only joking.
0:40:07 > 0:40:12That's a stereotypical night out in Chavos.
0:40:12 > 0:40:15No, what we'll do is exactly what I've just said.
0:40:16 > 0:40:20It's nearly 20 miles from Harpurhey to Manchester Airport,
0:40:20 > 0:40:23and the boys are finally on their way.
0:40:23 > 0:40:25To desk two, guys, tits and teeth.
0:40:26 > 0:40:30- Say, "Happy Hanukkah." - ALL: Happy Hanukkah!
0:40:30 > 0:40:34Three cheers for Chavos. Hip, hip, hooray!
0:40:34 > 0:40:36Ciao, babe.
0:40:47 > 0:40:52Pidge's eviction hearing court date has been set for one week's time.
0:40:52 > 0:40:56Despite complaints stacking up, he still has no intention of leaving.
0:40:56 > 0:41:01The complaints on my tenancy are about loud music
0:41:01 > 0:41:06and people be acting in a rowdy manner outside the house.
0:41:06 > 0:41:09But is it true?
0:41:09 > 0:41:12Yeah.
0:41:12 > 0:41:14- Do you care?- No.
0:41:15 > 0:41:20- Are you the neighbour from hell? - Probably, yeah.
0:41:20 > 0:41:24RAPS ALONG TO SONG PLAYING
0:41:24 > 0:41:27# Being erased from the estates of our parade #
0:41:27 > 0:41:33That house is currently the most troublesome house.
0:41:33 > 0:41:37I've managed to apply to the court for a hearing to throw them out.
0:41:37 > 0:41:43Pidge says he's been arrested 40 times and never been convicted cos he's got a great solicitor.
0:41:43 > 0:41:48And tells me that, when we're in court for his eviction, he's going to win as well.
0:41:48 > 0:41:50So we'll see.
0:41:59 > 0:42:02Let's go arrest people. Or at least try.
0:42:02 > 0:42:07PC Jim has been called to visit a man who's suspected of breaching the conditions of his bail.
0:42:08 > 0:42:10I know where we're going.
0:42:10 > 0:42:15The man wears a tag and has to be in his house every evening.
0:42:15 > 0:42:19But, last night, information from the tag shows that he went out.
0:42:21 > 0:42:24You all right? Is, er, is he in?
0:42:24 > 0:42:29- I'm his dad.- Yeah, is he in?- Yes.
0:42:29 > 0:42:31- Yeah? Is it you?- Yeah, me.
0:42:31 > 0:42:33- Do you know why we're here?- No.
0:42:33 > 0:42:36- You weren't in last night, were you? - I was here all night.
0:42:36 > 0:42:41It should beep, the machine. What time are they saying it's breached?
0:42:41 > 0:42:43- 25 to 4 this morning. - 25 to 4 in the morning?
0:42:43 > 0:42:48- They said it was called...- 25 to 4? I'm in the bed. I'm sleeping.
0:42:48 > 0:42:52- Right.- What am I going to do at 25 to 4 in the morning?
0:42:52 > 0:42:54I'll come in and have a look.
0:42:54 > 0:42:57How can I prove it to you? I cannot prove it to you?
0:42:57 > 0:42:59- When was it sent? - What can I do now?
0:42:59 > 0:43:03I'll get the sack from work for this, you know that? I've lost my job now.
0:43:03 > 0:43:07I made a mistake in my life. I was a stupid guy and I made a mistake.
0:43:07 > 0:43:12I got arrested for it, got locked up. Now I'm out, I want to change my life to show the judge
0:43:12 > 0:43:16that I've been working hard for my son and my wife, so the judge will say to me,
0:43:16 > 0:43:18"OK, you're a good lad."
0:43:18 > 0:43:21I'm a good lad, you can ask anyone, I'm friendly with everyone.
0:43:21 > 0:43:24You need to understand here, our hands are tied,
0:43:24 > 0:43:27and we've no choice but to take you into custody.
0:43:34 > 0:43:36OK.
0:43:46 > 0:43:48"Received, thank you."
0:43:52 > 0:43:54It's a really difficult one, this.
0:43:54 > 0:43:56Cos you don't...
0:43:58 > 0:44:00You could see he was upset.
0:44:01 > 0:44:06And I'm kind of inclined to believe him.
0:44:06 > 0:44:11But, funnily enough, people lie to the police.
0:44:11 > 0:44:13It's a bit of a sad fact
0:44:13 > 0:44:17but we can't believe anything that anybody says.
0:44:24 > 0:44:28And he was upset because he had to leave his little lad, which is...
0:44:28 > 0:44:30Is heart-breaking, I know.
0:44:30 > 0:44:33But there's not a great deal we could do.
0:44:33 > 0:44:37We are... The police are the bad guys sometimes.
0:44:38 > 0:44:41The next day, the court decided the man had not breached his bail.
0:44:43 > 0:44:46And he was allowed to return to his family.
0:44:55 > 0:44:58# Now and then I get insecure
0:44:58 > 0:45:04# From all the pain, I'm so ashamed
0:45:04 > 0:45:07# You are beautiful
0:45:07 > 0:45:09# No matter what they say
0:45:09 > 0:45:13# Words can't bring you down
0:45:13 > 0:45:17# Oh, no-oh-oh! #
0:45:20 > 0:45:23I'm ecstatic.
0:45:23 > 0:45:26At the Wakefields, Paul's spell living in the launderette is over
0:45:26 > 0:45:29and the family is back together again.
0:45:31 > 0:45:34They always come back together cos they love each other.
0:45:34 > 0:45:37They have, I don't know, it's a strange relationship
0:45:37 > 0:45:39because they're always arguing.
0:45:39 > 0:45:41They should be here any time now.
0:45:41 > 0:45:44Paul's my best mate. We're always together. We live, eat
0:45:44 > 0:45:47and breathe together and work together.
0:45:47 > 0:45:49It's like losing your right arm, really.
0:45:49 > 0:45:53Really missed him and I used to silently cry on me own.
0:45:53 > 0:45:55But didn't want the kids to know.
0:45:55 > 0:45:59It's love, innit, really? I don't know. Or better the devil you know.
0:46:01 > 0:46:04My dad does disappear sometimes.
0:46:04 > 0:46:06I just start getting all upset and that.
0:46:06 > 0:46:09And then I'm worried about him in case, like,
0:46:09 > 0:46:13stuff has happened to him and that and I'll never see him again.
0:46:13 > 0:46:16See, you know I'll always love you.
0:46:16 > 0:46:20When he comes back, I kind of like it.
0:46:20 > 0:46:23Cos, like, he's my dad and I love him.
0:46:28 > 0:46:30Just as the Wakefield family reunite,
0:46:30 > 0:46:32it's time for the first of the puppies
0:46:32 > 0:46:34to be collected by its new owners.
0:46:34 > 0:46:37Going to be weird not being knee-high in shit.
0:46:37 > 0:46:39It wasn't you that was knee-high in it.
0:46:39 > 0:46:43No, but I, thingy, I still had to spot it and say,
0:46:43 > 0:46:49- "There's some, there's some, there's some. Pick that up."- Yeah.
0:46:52 > 0:46:54BARKING
0:46:54 > 0:46:56You own him. My pleasure.
0:46:56 > 0:46:59I did want to keep them together as a family,
0:46:59 > 0:47:01because they are family, really.
0:47:01 > 0:47:06I wouldn't like it if I got split up and away from my sister.
0:47:07 > 0:47:09SHE CRIES
0:47:14 > 0:47:17Are you quite close, you and Madison?
0:47:17 > 0:47:19I wouldn't say close close, no.
0:47:19 > 0:47:22I don't know how to show the right emotion towards her,
0:47:22 > 0:47:24I think, know what I mean?
0:47:24 > 0:47:26I've got to make the appearance
0:47:26 > 0:47:28as if I'm the fucking one with the muscle.
0:47:28 > 0:47:31"You listen to what I say", know that sort of thing, like.
0:47:31 > 0:47:35I'm not one for showing emotion, you know.
0:47:35 > 0:47:37I don't know how to, know what I mean?
0:47:37 > 0:47:39SHE CRIES
0:47:39 > 0:47:43I would lie down in the road, yeah, for my kids.
0:47:43 > 0:47:45I would die, I'd take a bullet.
0:47:45 > 0:47:48I'd jump in front of a bus if it meant saving me kid.
0:47:48 > 0:47:53It's just that I miss them, I miss them.
0:47:54 > 0:47:58I miss Fang and I miss Roxy.
0:47:58 > 0:48:01And now I miss Tiger Lily.
0:48:01 > 0:48:06I think he missed out of what a family really is.
0:48:06 > 0:48:10But now that he has me and my mum and my sister,
0:48:10 > 0:48:12he knows what a family is now.
0:48:14 > 0:48:19Don't know what I'm going to do when Fluffy goes.
0:48:23 > 0:48:26# You'll be in the high life Soaking up the sunlight
0:48:26 > 0:48:29# Anything you want is yours
0:48:29 > 0:48:32# I heard you're living life like you should. #
0:48:32 > 0:48:34Arroll's week away with Patrick is over.
0:48:34 > 0:48:39He's readjusting to life after his first holiday abroad for ten years.
0:48:39 > 0:48:44Kavos itself, unless you're a 17-year-old wild party animal, there's not much to do.
0:48:44 > 0:48:47Basically, the shops open at 11 o'clock at night.
0:48:47 > 0:48:51Everywhere is open till seven in the morning and that's it.
0:48:51 > 0:48:54So, as you can imagine, too much sun, too much alcohol
0:48:54 > 0:48:59leads to a lot of cross words and carnage.
0:48:59 > 0:49:02# Girl, tell me how you feel What's your fantasy?
0:49:02 > 0:49:05# I see us on a beach down in Mexico You can put your feet up. #
0:49:05 > 0:49:08Patrick and his holiday buddy Ethan
0:49:08 > 0:49:10are still enjoying the memories of Kavos.
0:49:10 > 0:49:14I'll show you the pictures. Well, I'll get to the...
0:49:14 > 0:49:16I'll get to the front of the photos.
0:49:16 > 0:49:20Fantastic! There's funny ones of me. There's funny ones of everyone.
0:49:20 > 0:49:22I pissed in a bed, I was that drunk.
0:49:22 > 0:49:25- And denied it. - And denied it for days.
0:49:25 > 0:49:28Then I finally come to terms that I did piss in a bed.
0:49:28 > 0:49:32I must've drank three litres of grenadine. That's all they gave us.
0:49:32 > 0:49:37A vodka like that, which was probably water, then that much grenadine. I was shitting grenadine.
0:49:37 > 0:49:39Kavos is a place the beaches look like Blackpool.
0:49:39 > 0:49:45There was washed up cans, sick, shit. It was horrible as a place.
0:49:45 > 0:49:50It stunk of absolute cat piss, cheese, yoghurt, spam.
0:49:50 > 0:49:52- I felt like I was in a slum in Mumbai.- Don't compare...
0:49:52 > 0:49:54Like Slumdog Millionaire.
0:49:54 > 0:49:58- Don't compare it to Mumbai, it's not that bad. - No toilet roll.- No towels.
0:49:58 > 0:50:01We had no towels, no fresh bedding, no cleaners.
0:50:01 > 0:50:05All we had was vodka and drama.
0:50:05 > 0:50:10# We are never, ever, ever getting back together #
0:50:10 > 0:50:13Patrick and Arroll weren't just disappointed with Kavos,
0:50:13 > 0:50:15they were also disappointed with each other.
0:50:15 > 0:50:18They fell out after a drunken argument one night
0:50:18 > 0:50:20and returned home no longer friends.
0:50:20 > 0:50:25It is a shame and Patrick had potential to be one of my closest, best friends, he really, really did.
0:50:25 > 0:50:29I don't wish him any bad at all in the world, I really, really don't.
0:50:29 > 0:50:33We used to go and have beauty treatments done, sunbeds, out to town.
0:50:33 > 0:50:37All of them things, what I thought was a good friendship,
0:50:37 > 0:50:41what was escalating into a good friendship, obviously meant nothing.
0:50:41 > 0:50:44You see friends' true colours on holiday. There's always tension,
0:50:44 > 0:50:48there's always going to be an argument, especially in a big group.
0:50:48 > 0:50:53That's the only time I've ever been on a holiday and felt so uncomfortable in my life.
0:50:53 > 0:50:58When all the drama started, we thought, "Fuck this, we've not come on holiday for this," leave it to it.
0:50:58 > 0:51:01I don't see it as falling out, I see it as moving on.
0:51:01 > 0:51:05No point dwelling on it. Just get on with it. It happened, get over it.
0:51:05 > 0:51:08Who knows what will happen in the next couple of years?
0:51:08 > 0:51:10We might become friends again. Never say never.
0:51:10 > 0:51:11I'm not going to be sad
0:51:11 > 0:51:14over something that's not entirely finished.
0:51:14 > 0:51:17There was dramas, unnecessary dramas, leave it at that.
0:51:17 > 0:51:21- Yeah, it is what it is. - It is exactly what it is.
0:51:26 > 0:51:29Nik has had some welcome news.
0:51:29 > 0:51:31Pidge has decided not to fight his eviction.
0:51:31 > 0:51:36His life as a carefree bachelor with his own pad is over for now.
0:51:36 > 0:51:39And he's moving his belongings out today.
0:51:39 > 0:51:43I had an eviction notice for a court date, which was dated for today.
0:51:43 > 0:51:48And, um, I didn't want to wait till the last minute and then be homeless.
0:51:48 > 0:51:51So I decided yesterday, I asked me mum
0:51:51 > 0:51:56could I have me bedroom back till I find somewhere for me to stay.
0:51:56 > 0:51:58She said yeah. It's OK to be back in there.
0:51:58 > 0:52:03Instead of waiting for the court date and ending up getting evicted and have nowhere,
0:52:03 > 0:52:08I may as well get me room back and move back in, and that way everyone's happy.
0:52:08 > 0:52:11Nik gets his house back and I'm sleeping somewhere.
0:52:11 > 0:52:16It's like a game of chess, yeah. And you think he's going to do that,
0:52:16 > 0:52:19I'm going to do that, his move will be that and my move's that.
0:52:19 > 0:52:23Provided you play it like chess and you're so many moves ahead.
0:52:23 > 0:52:27When you crack your next move, isn't it the same as someone
0:52:27 > 0:52:31landing on Vine Street and you saying, "Rent, please"?
0:52:36 > 0:52:41Round here, parties will never stop on a weekend, there's always someone that'll have a party.
0:52:41 > 0:52:46There's always new places where you can start again, ain't there? A new leaf, ain't there?
0:52:53 > 0:52:56Well, there's certainly no hard feelings.
0:52:56 > 0:53:00He's just an ex-tenant, like so many others.
0:53:00 > 0:53:03I mean, I don't even know how many ex-tenants I've got now.
0:53:03 > 0:53:06He wasn't the worst tenant and he wasn't the best tenant.
0:53:06 > 0:53:10He was just, he was just all run of the mill. It's all normal, isn't it?
0:53:10 > 0:53:15There's nothing special about this house. This is, this is normal.
0:53:18 > 0:53:20With the eviction battle over,
0:53:20 > 0:53:23Nik sets about the clean-up of the shared house.
0:53:27 > 0:53:32Oh, I think, I think we can go for 70.5 centimetres on this one.
0:53:32 > 0:53:36We're measuring how high up the wall we've got dog shit cos
0:53:36 > 0:53:38no-one's ever achieved it up a wall before.
0:53:38 > 0:53:42So obviously it's going to be a thing for tenants to achieve now.
0:53:42 > 0:53:46So I'm thinking it's 70.5 centimetres.
0:53:46 > 0:53:48Or about...
0:53:49 > 0:53:53Yeah, I think we'll just do it metric rather than imperial.
0:53:53 > 0:53:55I don't think it's an English thing to do.
0:54:07 > 0:54:10The Wakefields' life is getting back to normal.
0:54:10 > 0:54:12Are you awake?
0:54:12 > 0:54:16- No.- Going to get up now?
0:54:16 > 0:54:18I'm up for breakfast.
0:54:18 > 0:54:22- Dad!- Yeah?- Mum said she wants a cup of tea
0:54:22 > 0:54:24and breakfast.
0:54:24 > 0:54:26Breakfast.
0:54:31 > 0:54:33Dad, what about this one? This one's nice.
0:54:33 > 0:54:35SHE PLAYS PIANO
0:54:46 > 0:54:51When I met Kaz, I knew for a fact, the day I met her, the minute I met her,
0:54:51 > 0:54:54that she was going to be the one who changed my life.
0:54:58 > 0:55:01If it wasn't for Kaz, I'd be probably dead, you know.
0:55:01 > 0:55:05In a prison, you know. Or in some sort of gutter somewhere.
0:55:05 > 0:55:09- Paul?- Yeah?- Do me a brew.
0:55:09 > 0:55:13- I'm doing it now.- Slow. - Not scratching me arse.
0:55:13 > 0:55:15Pardon?
0:55:15 > 0:55:17I said I love you.
0:55:17 > 0:55:21- No, what did you say? - I'm not scratching my arse. - Hope you're not giving cheek to me.
0:55:21 > 0:55:24- Knobhead.- What?- Nowt.
0:55:24 > 0:55:27Ooh. Paul, do you know before you get a bath...
0:55:27 > 0:55:30- Can I finish what I'm doing? - What are you doing?
0:55:30 > 0:55:35- A lot fucking more than what you are at the moment. - Oi, cheeky git, I've not stopped.
0:55:35 > 0:55:37Doing me hair and that.
0:55:45 > 0:55:47What have you been doing today?
0:55:47 > 0:55:49Next week, young mum Sherelle
0:55:49 > 0:55:52is trying to stay out of trouble for the sake of her son.
0:55:52 > 0:55:57Yeah, but how can you get the complaint if I don't have a stereo?
0:55:57 > 0:56:00At the launderette, Maddy's starting high school
0:56:00 > 0:56:04- and Mum and Dad think it's time she grows up.- I've got a job for you.
0:56:06 > 0:56:11And pregnant Louise gets valuable advice before the birth of her baby.
0:56:11 > 0:56:15When you're in pain, you just want anything to get it out.
0:56:17 > 0:56:20Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd