0:00:08 > 0:00:11BIRDS SING
0:00:11 > 0:00:15This programme contains scenes which some viewers may find disturbing
0:01:12 > 0:01:17Today, my life is the life of a housewife.
0:01:24 > 0:01:26I live in a little village
0:01:26 > 0:01:32and my husband works in the Forest Service, as an administrator.
0:01:38 > 0:01:41SHE SPEAKS GERMAN
0:01:42 > 0:01:45'Our little grandson David is living with us,
0:01:45 > 0:01:53'because my daughter had a problem with drug addiction when he was born,
0:01:53 > 0:01:55'so she couldn't take him.'
0:01:58 > 0:02:00'He is my life.
0:02:02 > 0:02:05'And I think I do for him
0:02:05 > 0:02:10'what I would have liked to do for my father, when he was a child.
0:02:10 > 0:02:13'If you can't change the past,
0:02:13 > 0:02:16'maybe you can do something for the future.'
0:02:20 > 0:02:24'And I hope that he never will hold a rifle with his hand.'
0:02:28 > 0:02:31I was born
0:02:31 > 0:02:34in 1945, in a little town
0:02:34 > 0:02:37near Munich. Nobody,
0:02:37 > 0:02:41nobody in Germany talked about
0:02:41 > 0:02:43the Second World War.
0:02:43 > 0:02:46"We want to live again", people said.
0:02:46 > 0:02:50"We had trouble enough, and misery enough,
0:02:50 > 0:02:53"and now we want to live."
0:03:22 > 0:03:23I never asked
0:03:23 > 0:03:25about my father. Never.
0:03:25 > 0:03:32Because I was not aware that every child had a father.
0:03:32 > 0:03:36I didn't know anything about a complete family.
0:03:36 > 0:03:38I asked my grandmother,
0:03:38 > 0:03:42"Grandmother, do I have a father, too?"
0:03:42 > 0:03:47And she said, "But, Monika, every child has a father."
0:03:47 > 0:03:50And I asked my mother and said, "Where is MY father?"
0:03:50 > 0:03:55And she said, "Like millions of men,
0:03:55 > 0:04:02"he died for his country, and he is dead - shot down."
0:04:02 > 0:04:06I believed her. I didn't know why I shouldn't believe her.
0:04:21 > 0:04:25My mother didn't like it that I called her "Mother" or "Mum."
0:04:25 > 0:04:29And so, I started to call her Ruth.
0:04:32 > 0:04:35We didn't like each other at all. I loved my grandmother,
0:04:35 > 0:04:42but I couldn't get along with my mother, not at all.
0:04:42 > 0:04:44We were like water and fire.
0:04:44 > 0:04:51One day, when I was about 11 years old, it was a very hot day,
0:04:51 > 0:04:54and I wanted to go swimming.
0:04:54 > 0:04:59And...she said,
0:04:59 > 0:05:00"No, you won't go.
0:05:00 > 0:05:05"You will do your work and, after that, you will go."
0:05:06 > 0:05:11And in this moment, I was full of hate.
0:05:11 > 0:05:19And I said to her, "You and your goddamn dog," and everything,
0:05:19 > 0:05:21and she looked at me,
0:05:21 > 0:05:27and she said, "You, you are like your father,
0:05:27 > 0:05:30"and one time, you will die like him."
0:05:30 > 0:05:37I said to my grandmother, "What does she mean, I will die like Amon?
0:05:37 > 0:05:43"My father died in the Second World War, how can I die like he died?"
0:05:44 > 0:05:50After a while, Grandmother said, "Monika, they hanged him."
0:05:51 > 0:05:55And I said, "They hanged him? Why?"
0:05:55 > 0:06:00And she said, "They killed the Jews."
0:06:01 > 0:06:07And I didn't know anything about Jews, I have never seen a Jew in my life.
0:06:07 > 0:06:12The only one I knew who was a Jew was Jesus.
0:06:12 > 0:06:13And...
0:06:15 > 0:06:17..the people around him.
0:06:17 > 0:06:24But the Jews had lived in Germany, I didn't know.
0:06:24 > 0:06:28Nobody knew from the younger generation.
0:06:28 > 0:06:31I wanted to know what happened to the Jews
0:06:31 > 0:06:36and I wanted to know how my father was involved.
0:06:36 > 0:06:41And so, I had just one person, and that was my grandmother -
0:06:41 > 0:06:45my mother's mother.
0:06:45 > 0:06:48And so she started to explain.
0:06:48 > 0:06:51She told me about the Nazis and the Jews.
0:06:52 > 0:06:57In Europe, Germany, in Poland and Romania.
0:06:57 > 0:06:59She educated me...
0:07:01 > 0:07:05..in a way that I felt guilty,
0:07:05 > 0:07:09because grandmother felt guilty, too.
0:07:10 > 0:07:13She...she felt guilty, too.
0:07:15 > 0:07:19My father was the commander of the Plaszow concentration camp.
0:07:22 > 0:07:26He was there for 500 days, exactly.
0:07:32 > 0:07:36He was responsible for the death of thousands of people.
0:07:50 > 0:07:55I got to Camp Plaszow, and I was assigned to clean barracks.
0:07:55 > 0:07:57It was the third day,
0:07:57 > 0:08:01when one very tall SS
0:08:01 > 0:08:03walked into the barracks.
0:08:03 > 0:08:08This was Amon Goeth. And he was the new commandment of Plaszow.
0:08:10 > 0:08:12I was cleaning a window.
0:08:12 > 0:08:16He stopped in front of me,
0:08:16 > 0:08:19and he said to the woman that took care of us, the orderly,
0:08:19 > 0:08:22he says, "I want her in my house."
0:08:24 > 0:08:28"If a Jewish girl is smart enough to clean a window on a sunny day,
0:08:28 > 0:08:30"she'll probably be good for me."
0:08:31 > 0:08:39Every day, my grandmother and I, we were talking about these two girls,
0:08:39 > 0:08:40the Helenas.
0:08:40 > 0:08:43The very first day when I arrived,
0:08:43 > 0:08:46there was another woman there already.
0:08:46 > 0:08:48Her name was also Helen.
0:08:48 > 0:08:52He asked me my name, I said, "I'm Helena".
0:08:52 > 0:08:56He said, "I have one Helena. Your name will be Susanna."
0:08:56 > 0:08:59Yeah, it's like a Nazi to say,
0:08:59 > 0:09:05"Your name is Helena, I don't need a Helena, so your name is Susanna."
0:09:05 > 0:09:12My first job was to iron his shirt. As I'm ironing the shirt,
0:09:12 > 0:09:18he slapped me so hard on my cheek. He said, "You stupid Jew,
0:09:18 > 0:09:21"you don't even know how to iron a shirt properly."
0:09:23 > 0:09:25He says, "In Vienna, a girl your age
0:09:25 > 0:09:29"knows how to iron a shirt, but you're too dumb."
0:09:29 > 0:09:32And I started to cry.
0:09:32 > 0:09:35And he hit me so hard again.
0:09:36 > 0:09:37In that moment,
0:09:37 > 0:09:40I realised that I have to grow up.
0:09:40 > 0:09:44I'm no more child, I'm no more with my mother...
0:09:47 > 0:09:50..I am here - and I have to obey.
0:09:55 > 0:09:59Amon Goeth lived in the most beautiful villa,
0:09:59 > 0:10:01that was built specifically for him.
0:10:01 > 0:10:04And he ordered us to live there.
0:10:04 > 0:10:07We were not allowed to go out and mingle with other people.
0:10:09 > 0:10:12He had a woman living with him, her name was Ruth.
0:10:12 > 0:10:17She loved this man more than
0:10:17 > 0:10:19anybody else in this world.
0:10:19 > 0:10:22She was a very pretty young woman with dark hair,
0:10:22 > 0:10:24she had a little doggy, a black dog,
0:10:24 > 0:10:28that she carried all the time under her arm.
0:10:28 > 0:10:34I can't explain that, the feeling Ruth had... my mother had for my father.
0:10:34 > 0:10:38He lived like a king. And he had his mistress with him.
0:10:38 > 0:10:41And he had those two slaves.
0:10:41 > 0:10:45And unfortunately, I was one of them.
0:10:50 > 0:10:55I read in the newspaper that Steven Spielberg was making a film
0:10:55 > 0:10:57called Schindler's List.
0:10:59 > 0:11:04And so I went to this film. And...
0:11:06 > 0:11:07I was looking for my father.
0:11:13 > 0:11:15THEY SPEAK GERMAN
0:11:16 > 0:11:18Shoot her.
0:11:21 > 0:11:25Herr Kommandant! I'm only trying to do my job.
0:11:25 > 0:11:28- Yeah, I'm doing mine. - Sir, she's foreman of construction.
0:11:28 > 0:11:32We are not going to have arguments with these people.
0:11:35 > 0:11:38Shoot her, here, on my authority.
0:11:49 > 0:11:51It will take more than that.
0:11:51 > 0:11:52I'm sure you're right.
0:11:54 > 0:11:58I started to hate that Spielberg.
0:11:58 > 0:12:00I hated him.
0:12:00 > 0:12:05When I came home, I was sick.
0:12:05 > 0:12:08Spielberg told me the truth.
0:12:08 > 0:12:11And for telling me the truth, I attacked him.
0:12:13 > 0:12:17Because I didn't know... I didn't want to know everything.
0:12:20 > 0:12:22SHE SPEAKS GERMAN
0:12:25 > 0:12:30I found out that Helen was living in the United States,
0:12:30 > 0:12:35because one New Year's Eve, there was a documentary
0:12:35 > 0:12:38about Schindler's survivors.
0:12:38 > 0:12:43I had participated in a documentary made for German TV.
0:12:46 > 0:12:49I always wanted to meet Helen.
0:12:49 > 0:12:51So I wrote a letter to her.
0:12:54 > 0:13:00I didn't write very much, but I wrote to her that
0:13:00 > 0:13:06I always would have liked to meet her in my life.
0:13:06 > 0:13:08And that is the truth.
0:13:08 > 0:13:15I received a letter from Monika, and I'm very touched.
0:13:15 > 0:13:19I realise how much she wanted to meet with me,
0:13:19 > 0:13:24and I didn't think a few years ago that I would be able to do it,
0:13:24 > 0:13:27but I thought it over,
0:13:27 > 0:13:32and I understand how important it is for her and others like her
0:13:32 > 0:13:34to find out the truth.
0:13:34 > 0:13:39She says that she knows how difficult it is for me,
0:13:39 > 0:13:41but it is difficult for her as well.
0:13:41 > 0:13:46She will be scared to see me.
0:13:46 > 0:13:47I know that.
0:13:47 > 0:13:51And, in a way...
0:13:52 > 0:13:55I'm scared, too, to see her,
0:13:55 > 0:13:58because of all her pain.
0:14:04 > 0:14:09'I thought it over a lot, and I'm going to meet Monika,
0:14:09 > 0:14:12'which years ago, I didn't think that I would be able to.'
0:14:15 > 0:14:20'I never thought I would be willing to go back to Poland.'
0:14:20 > 0:14:28But I want to go to Plaszow, and go to the villa, if it's still there,
0:14:28 > 0:14:32because maybe that will bring some closure for me.
0:14:35 > 0:14:37I will be with my daughter Vivian,
0:14:37 > 0:14:40at least one of my children will be with me.
0:14:41 > 0:14:46I know that it's going to be painful for her,
0:14:46 > 0:14:48but she wants to do it.
0:14:48 > 0:14:52She wants to do it - she said to me, "I think it's a good thing, Mum."
0:15:11 > 0:15:13It's a beautiful area.
0:15:16 > 0:15:23I played in the castle, I used to go sled riding with my sisters.
0:15:23 > 0:15:26I had a happy childhood here.
0:15:26 > 0:15:29I had happy memories from my school, my friends.
0:15:31 > 0:15:36I was very fond of this city of Krakow.
0:15:36 > 0:15:39I was 14 when the war broke out.
0:15:39 > 0:15:42Nothing worried me.
0:15:42 > 0:15:46I really didn't think anything bad could happen to us.
0:15:47 > 0:15:50But within a short time,
0:15:50 > 0:15:53we were told that we all had to move to the ghetto.
0:15:53 > 0:16:00We had only a few days to take our belongings, whatever we could,
0:16:00 > 0:16:06and walked to the part of Krakow that was surrounded with stone walls.
0:16:08 > 0:16:12Within a couple of months, two SS walked into our room,
0:16:12 > 0:16:14and took my father away.
0:16:14 > 0:16:17They picked him, and dragged him out.
0:16:19 > 0:16:21And he, with a smile on his face,
0:16:21 > 0:16:24turned around to put us at ease
0:16:24 > 0:16:27and he said, "Don't worry, children, they need me,
0:16:27 > 0:16:31"they're taking me to work, don't worry.
0:16:31 > 0:16:32My father was sent away.
0:16:32 > 0:16:35I found out after the war, he was taken to Belzec,
0:16:35 > 0:16:38where all the people were gassed.
0:17:02 > 0:17:03PHONE RINGS
0:17:03 > 0:17:05Excuse me.
0:17:07 > 0:17:09- 'Hello?'- Hello.
0:17:09 > 0:17:12- 'Yes?'- Helen? - 'Yes?'- It's Monika.
0:17:12 > 0:17:15'Hello, Monika. Good morning.'
0:17:15 > 0:17:19Good morning, Helen. Um...
0:17:19 > 0:17:22- So are you here somewhere close to the hotel?- 'Yeah.'
0:17:22 > 0:17:24Are you here somewhere?
0:17:24 > 0:17:27OK, well, I'm here with my daughter.
0:17:27 > 0:17:30- 'I know.'- And her name is Vivian.
0:17:30 > 0:17:33- I know.- 'And...'
0:17:33 > 0:17:36You went to meet at the monument?
0:17:36 > 0:17:40- Mm.- 'OK. I would like to say a prayer,'
0:17:40 > 0:17:44and I would like to light a candle there.
0:17:45 > 0:17:47'And...
0:17:47 > 0:17:50'and I feel that...'
0:17:50 > 0:17:53SHE SOBS
0:17:55 > 0:17:57- OK.- 'It's OK.'
0:17:57 > 0:18:01In 30 minutes, OK?
0:18:02 > 0:18:04- Uh, Monika...- 'Yeah?'
0:18:04 > 0:18:09'Monika, I... I received your letter.'
0:18:09 > 0:18:13And you seem like a very sensitive person.
0:18:16 > 0:18:20And I have to tell you things that...
0:18:20 > 0:18:22are pretty...that, uh...
0:18:24 > 0:18:28..are very tragic, and I will refer to Amon Goeth.
0:18:28 > 0:18:33I have to disconnect myself when I speak to you,
0:18:33 > 0:18:38because I may just tell...
0:18:38 > 0:18:43quite tragic things, so I will...
0:18:43 > 0:18:46'refer to him as Amon Goeth, Monika.'
0:18:46 > 0:18:51He is Amon. I never said "Father". He is Amon.
0:18:53 > 0:18:55'I have to tell you that...'
0:18:57 > 0:18:59I feel for you.
0:18:59 > 0:19:02- And I will see you shortly.- OK.
0:19:02 > 0:19:06- I am very happy to see you. - 'OK, thank you.'- OK.
0:19:06 > 0:19:12- I see you soon. OK? Bye bye, Monika. - 'Bye bye, Helen.'
0:19:21 > 0:19:22Are you OK?
0:19:22 > 0:19:24- I'll be with you in a minute.- OK.
0:19:24 > 0:19:27As a mother, I understand
0:19:27 > 0:19:31that children somehow suffer
0:19:31 > 0:19:34because of their parents' background.
0:19:36 > 0:19:40Monika was traumatised by the fact that
0:19:40 > 0:19:43she found out who her father was in reality.
0:19:44 > 0:19:46And...
0:19:46 > 0:19:50I guess I am the one that can tell her a lot about it,
0:19:50 > 0:19:54because...I lived under his roof.
0:19:54 > 0:19:59'I want to ask her what did Ruth do'
0:19:59 > 0:20:05in those times when she was with Amon.
0:20:05 > 0:20:09'And at least I would like to know
0:20:09 > 0:20:15'how can a young girl survive in this hopelessness, because I know
0:20:15 > 0:20:19'I never would have made it. Never.'
0:20:19 > 0:20:22- What a beautiful day today. - It's nice.
0:20:22 > 0:20:25I guess somewhere, someone is with us.
0:20:28 > 0:20:34'But I... I think most important for me is, er...'
0:20:34 > 0:20:38to see her. To see her.
0:21:15 > 0:21:19SHE SNIFFLES
0:21:19 > 0:21:21SHE SOBS
0:21:44 > 0:21:47Mum? Mum?
0:22:09 > 0:22:12MONIKA SOBS
0:22:15 > 0:22:17Monika?
0:22:17 > 0:22:19- Hello.- Hi, Monika.
0:22:29 > 0:22:32This is my daughter Vivian.
0:22:32 > 0:22:34Hello. How are you doing?
0:22:34 > 0:22:38MONIKA SNIFFLES
0:22:38 > 0:22:39It's OK.
0:22:42 > 0:22:45I need this for myself, too.
0:22:45 > 0:22:47I need this, too.
0:22:47 > 0:22:49Those are my people here.
0:22:49 > 0:22:51I need to come here,
0:22:51 > 0:22:55and my mother's... remnants are still here.
0:22:55 > 0:22:59I know that she is buried here.
0:22:59 > 0:23:01Well, my friend Adam buried her.
0:23:01 > 0:23:04- Adam?- Yeah.
0:23:04 > 0:23:08I had a boyfriend in Plaszow...
0:23:10 > 0:23:13..and he was very active with the underground group.
0:23:13 > 0:23:18He felt that we have to fight back when the time comes.
0:23:19 > 0:23:22One day I was in the yard...
0:23:22 > 0:23:26and there comes Goeth. You know, he used to ride a white horse
0:23:26 > 0:23:30and he stopped. He says, "Susanna."
0:23:30 > 0:23:32He says, "Where is Adam?"
0:23:32 > 0:23:37I looked up at him. I said... I said, "I don't know."
0:23:40 > 0:23:44I saw him on his horse...
0:23:44 > 0:23:47very quickly down the road.
0:23:47 > 0:23:50Before I knew, I hear two shots.
0:23:56 > 0:23:58He killed him.
0:24:05 > 0:24:11Adam had been by my mother's side all the time she was ill,
0:24:11 > 0:24:15and Adam was by her side when she died.
0:24:15 > 0:24:19And he told me...
0:24:19 > 0:24:23that he, he buried her.
0:24:23 > 0:24:29But, you see, because Amon Goeth killed Adam,
0:24:29 > 0:24:32I can never find my mum's body.
0:24:37 > 0:24:40He was a monster.
0:24:40 > 0:24:42He was a living monster.
0:24:42 > 0:24:44He enjoyed what he was doing.
0:24:44 > 0:24:49But he did it out of pleasure because I saw his face.
0:24:49 > 0:24:53After killing, he looked content,
0:24:53 > 0:24:57he whistled coming through the yard.
0:24:57 > 0:25:00And when he was restless and he didn't sleep,
0:25:00 > 0:25:03I could hear his steps upstairs
0:25:03 > 0:25:06and that was the first thing, six o'clock in the morning,
0:25:06 > 0:25:09when people were marching to work, that he would disappear.
0:25:09 > 0:25:13He had a couple of hats hanging near the doorway
0:25:13 > 0:25:17and I even knew what kind of hat he would put on that he was going to kill people.
0:25:17 > 0:25:20We were very attuned to him.
0:25:20 > 0:25:26We lived with this man day and night and, erm...
0:25:29 > 0:25:30Ah...
0:25:31 > 0:25:35Do you think something happened to him as a young man
0:25:35 > 0:25:37that something...
0:25:37 > 0:25:41Somebody did something to him, that he was so evil?
0:25:41 > 0:25:45And why, when he hit me,
0:25:45 > 0:25:47why he stood there, so content.
0:25:47 > 0:25:54That he is able to treat two young girls in that way
0:25:54 > 0:25:59and...and the fear of these girls.
0:26:01 > 0:26:03I think I...
0:26:07 > 0:26:12I believe everything, but I can't live with it.
0:26:14 > 0:26:20I can't live with Amon and what he did to the girls.
0:26:20 > 0:26:25Why didn't Ruth help you? Why didn't she help you?
0:26:28 > 0:26:31She covered her eyes to all that was happening.
0:26:32 > 0:26:40- Oh.- She wanted to make believe like none of this is happening.
0:26:40 > 0:26:42That was my impression.
0:26:42 > 0:26:46- And this was... - She did say once to me,
0:26:46 > 0:26:52"If I could help you, I would, but I can't."
0:26:52 > 0:26:57I thought, OK, if Ruth was with him,
0:26:57 > 0:27:01she would have helped the victims.
0:27:01 > 0:27:06If he would have done wrong, there was still my mother
0:27:06 > 0:27:08and she will do something.
0:27:10 > 0:27:14Am I better than my father? She told me, "You are like him and you will die like him."
0:27:14 > 0:27:22And so I was always looking in my life. Maybe I am really like him.
0:27:22 > 0:27:27- But... But I am not. - You have a choice.- Yes, I know.
0:27:27 > 0:27:35And those people here died because of one man, Amon Goeth, in a cruel way.
0:27:35 > 0:27:37We just can't be silent.
0:27:37 > 0:27:43We just can't push things away. They are there. They disturb our lives.
0:27:43 > 0:27:46My children are affected.
0:27:46 > 0:27:50All my survivors' children. We are traumatised people.
0:27:50 > 0:27:56- And that's why I made this trip to find to a little peace here.- I know.
0:27:56 > 0:27:59You know what people tell me in Germany?
0:27:59 > 0:28:03I went to school to speak to some children.
0:28:03 > 0:28:06"Oh, God, you are a strong person."
0:28:06 > 0:28:08- I am not a strong person. - You will become.
0:28:08 > 0:28:12When the children are gone and the teachers are gone, I break down.
0:28:12 > 0:28:17You break down? You have a right to break down. It's good.
0:28:17 > 0:28:19You have a mission.
0:28:19 > 0:28:23Look at those monuments. What do they mean?
0:28:23 > 0:28:26There are bodies here, innocent bodies.
0:28:26 > 0:28:30HELEN SOBS Good people.
0:28:30 > 0:28:33I don't think God wants it.
0:28:34 > 0:28:39'When Helen was speaking about Amon,
0:28:39 > 0:28:43'I still was able to see all the fear in her eyes.
0:28:43 > 0:28:51'And I can't remember to see such fear in the eyes of a human being,
0:28:51 > 0:28:55'just about one person.'
0:29:00 > 0:29:05I have been to Plaszow before, but never to the villa.
0:29:07 > 0:29:08I know it is still there.
0:29:09 > 0:29:12HELEN SPEAKS IN POLISH
0:29:26 > 0:29:30The same colour door. That's the colour.
0:29:30 > 0:29:32That's the colour door.
0:29:32 > 0:29:35- HELEN GASPS - The same colour?- The same colour.
0:29:36 > 0:29:40Every... Every room in that house
0:29:40 > 0:29:44brings sad memories, unfortunately,
0:29:44 > 0:29:47but I want to face them.
0:29:48 > 0:29:50This is the kitchen.
0:29:50 > 0:29:53HELEN SOBS
0:29:53 > 0:29:56This is the kitchen.
0:29:56 > 0:30:00This wasn't here. This wasn't here. There was a big table here.
0:30:00 > 0:30:04A big table. This wasn't here. This was my room.
0:30:05 > 0:30:09This was my room. HELEN CONTINUES TO SOB
0:30:09 > 0:30:12I used to stand here and look out.
0:30:16 > 0:30:21This was the window. I used to envy people - they walked to work.
0:30:21 > 0:30:23And I was all alone.
0:30:28 > 0:30:32They were marching to work. The camp was over there. Now I can understand.
0:30:32 > 0:30:37- They were going to Madritsch over there in the factory. - Where was Madritsch?
0:30:37 > 0:30:41Over there. Over there where the factory is, to the right,
0:30:41 > 0:30:44they were marching from the left to the right.
0:30:44 > 0:30:47This was my room.
0:30:47 > 0:30:53When I heard his footsteps... I shivered when I heard his footsteps.
0:30:57 > 0:31:01'I feared those steps. I heard those steps upstairs.
0:31:01 > 0:31:03'He wouldn't sleep.'
0:31:03 > 0:31:06He would walk around first thing in the morning.
0:31:06 > 0:31:10He would walk out of the villa at six o'clock and I would hear shooting.
0:31:12 > 0:31:15He had the urge to kill. Like an animal.
0:31:17 > 0:31:22- OK. Here, you see, I told you, a French door.- Yes.
0:31:22 > 0:31:25OK. There was a big table over there
0:31:25 > 0:31:30where all the SS were entertaining, over there.
0:31:30 > 0:31:32And this is where he used to go out.
0:31:34 > 0:31:36There he used to go out.
0:31:38 > 0:31:40And that's where he trained the dog.
0:31:40 > 0:31:44- Here?- Yeah, in the back yard.
0:31:44 > 0:31:48There were two large dogs in the house.
0:31:48 > 0:31:53One was black and white spots, named Ralf.
0:31:53 > 0:31:58The other one was beige and brown - Alf.
0:31:58 > 0:32:05Ralf was his favourite dog that he trained to rip people apart.
0:32:06 > 0:32:10The scenes that I have seen those dogs...
0:32:16 > 0:32:21..have done to people, I can't explain.
0:32:22 > 0:32:28This was a bedroom. This was a large bedroom. They had a round bed.
0:32:28 > 0:32:31- A round...? - A round bed. Right here, OK?
0:32:31 > 0:32:38A round bed and this is where she used to lie a lot of the time,
0:32:38 > 0:32:40and put the masks on her face.
0:32:40 > 0:32:44My mother, she had everything.
0:32:44 > 0:32:48I saw her most of the time mixing yolks and cucumbers
0:32:48 > 0:32:52and lying on the bed with masks on her face.
0:32:52 > 0:32:58Amon gave everything to her. She had no need, not at all.
0:32:58 > 0:33:03I mean, this home was incredibly rich in everything.
0:33:03 > 0:33:07Fresh fruit, meats, wine, liquor,
0:33:07 > 0:33:09anything that one can think of.
0:33:10 > 0:33:15But, do you know what, I know Ruth.
0:33:17 > 0:33:19It was her house.
0:33:21 > 0:33:24- I know my mother. - It was HIS house.
0:33:24 > 0:33:31Yeah, but that was the way she liked to live.
0:33:32 > 0:33:38So this was her way with the piano, with people who played for her.
0:33:38 > 0:33:44She didn't see anything. She was just in the house. The camp was down.
0:33:44 > 0:33:45That's what she said.
0:33:45 > 0:33:48- Not seeing...- Don't say that.
0:33:48 > 0:33:53She saw us downstairs. She heard shots.
0:33:53 > 0:33:57- She heard?- It was very obvious, you could hear.
0:33:57 > 0:34:00There was shooting like no tomorrow.
0:34:00 > 0:34:04- You know how many thousands of people died?- Yes.
0:34:04 > 0:34:11Now, when you talk and tell me, but what I heard when I was a child,
0:34:11 > 0:34:15- he only killed some Jews because of...- Because they were Jews.
0:34:15 > 0:34:19No. Because of sanitary problems. Because...
0:34:19 > 0:34:21Because they were just Jews.
0:34:21 > 0:34:27- They...- Monika, they were just Jews. - They wouldn't use the bathroom
0:34:27 > 0:34:32and, therefore, there was a disease and then when he saw some men...
0:34:32 > 0:34:37- Monika, I have to stop you right now. - That was my history.
0:34:37 > 0:34:41Yes, but from now on, you can see that it's the ignorance.
0:34:41 > 0:34:47It was just simply we were tortured and killed because we were Jews.
0:34:47 > 0:34:49That's it. Nothing else.
0:34:49 > 0:34:51But, you know, Helen, I knew that.
0:34:51 > 0:34:58But now you shouldn't even say the other thing, what other people say, because that is just not true.
0:34:58 > 0:35:04- I know.- This is the wrongdoing. This is why people are misled
0:35:04 > 0:35:09and they keep on... If it is repeated like that, it will happen again.
0:35:09 > 0:35:14- We have to start something different. It's not true.- I know that.
0:35:14 > 0:35:18I knew it as a child, too. But they were talking and talking...
0:35:18 > 0:35:23- Let's just stop thinking that way. It's bad, it's dangerous. - I didn't think about...
0:35:23 > 0:35:30I have a chance with you. I have the greatest chance of my life.
0:35:30 > 0:35:33- I know that.- But don't think back
0:35:33 > 0:35:37that what this one said, or this one said.
0:35:37 > 0:35:40- They had to have an excuse, they have to...- RUTH told me.
0:35:40 > 0:35:46- It's her denial. - Denial. Live in denial.
0:35:46 > 0:35:48No, we can't allow it.
0:35:48 > 0:35:51- Words cannot explain the pain. - I know.
0:35:51 > 0:35:56It cannot. I can't explain what this room means to me
0:35:56 > 0:35:59when I was treated like a criminal!
0:35:59 > 0:36:04Like a criminal. Like a dirty Jew!
0:36:43 > 0:36:47After being with him, under his command,
0:36:47 > 0:36:51I never feared death because I knew that he'd kill me anyhow.
0:36:51 > 0:36:55I really was sure that he would kill me.
0:36:55 > 0:36:58During the day, I was hardly here.
0:36:58 > 0:37:01I came in to straighten out the beds and that was about it.
0:37:01 > 0:37:03Because he was sitting here?
0:37:03 > 0:37:05They were lying around.
0:37:05 > 0:37:07There were loungers here.
0:37:07 > 0:37:09A little dog, a black little dog.
0:37:09 > 0:37:14There were two or three loungers that they were lying around.
0:37:14 > 0:37:17I never had such fear constantly about him
0:37:17 > 0:37:19and what he was going to do next.
0:37:19 > 0:37:21I saw the shooting and killing.
0:37:21 > 0:37:25You know, he was the only one in the camp who decided who was
0:37:25 > 0:37:29going to live and who was going to die. He was the only one.
0:37:29 > 0:37:34One person told me, "You know, I called your father
0:37:34 > 0:37:37"the Emperor of Plaszow."
0:37:38 > 0:37:41He could do whatever he wanted to do.
0:37:41 > 0:37:46There was no-one else. That's why when they came for him,
0:37:46 > 0:37:50it was unbelievable that he was powerless suddenly.
0:37:50 > 0:37:57Two civilian walked in to the villa and he came down from the stairs
0:37:57 > 0:38:00and I was just standing, just looking up to know what was
0:38:00 > 0:38:04going on and I saw them handing the paper and him looking at the paper.
0:38:04 > 0:38:07The next thing I knew, he didn't go back,
0:38:07 > 0:38:09he reached for the belt and the hat
0:38:09 > 0:38:13and he walked in the centre with them out of the villa.
0:38:13 > 0:38:16We didn't hear from him any more.
0:38:16 > 0:38:21And we were in villa, not knowing what to do... for days.
0:38:21 > 0:38:24We assumed that he might be in prison
0:38:24 > 0:38:27and then we found out that he was.
0:38:27 > 0:38:30He was taken to prison by his own Germans
0:38:30 > 0:38:33because he was stealing people's goods.
0:38:33 > 0:38:35The belongings from Jews.
0:38:35 > 0:38:38All the SS men did it.
0:38:38 > 0:38:41All the SS men kept money
0:38:41 > 0:38:45and had much for themselves.
0:38:45 > 0:38:49He was shipping it himself to Austria
0:38:49 > 0:38:53and they found out and they denounced him and they arrested him.
0:38:53 > 0:38:59I still don't understand how an educated person like my father was...
0:39:01 > 0:39:05..could believe in the Nazi
0:39:05 > 0:39:07point of view.
0:39:07 > 0:39:09I can understand that.
0:39:12 > 0:39:17He was executed by the Polish authorities.
0:39:17 > 0:39:24When Amon was hanged, I was still a baby but two years ago,
0:39:24 > 0:39:27I saw the footage of his execution,
0:39:27 > 0:39:30filmed by the Polish government.
0:39:31 > 0:39:35When he was hanged, he was hanged three times.
0:39:35 > 0:39:39The third time, when they hanged him, then he was dead.
0:39:39 > 0:39:41His neck was broken.
0:41:03 > 0:41:05Yeah, now he's dead.
0:41:08 > 0:41:11I think he was spared by an easy death.
0:41:14 > 0:41:17I mean, I never looked for revenge
0:41:17 > 0:41:20but he should have suffered a little...
0:41:21 > 0:41:23..how he made people suffer.
0:41:38 > 0:41:41Today I felt like I finished a mission.
0:41:43 > 0:41:48I felt that actually being there, I will have some peace.
0:41:53 > 0:41:55- Bye, Vivian.- Bye-bye.
0:41:57 > 0:41:59Bye-bye.
0:42:08 > 0:42:13Two days after liberation, I met Joseph Jonas
0:42:13 > 0:42:17and we got married before we came to the United States.
0:42:19 > 0:42:22He was a very special young man, very bright.
0:42:23 > 0:42:29Joseph tried very hard to live a normal life
0:42:29 > 0:42:31but he was troubled.
0:42:34 > 0:42:36Excuse me.
0:42:39 > 0:42:44He would sit at the table, read his paper and he'd write
0:42:44 > 0:42:50his father's name over and over again, Salomon Salomon.
0:42:54 > 0:42:56Excuse me.
0:43:04 > 0:43:07That's what the Germans did to us.
0:43:07 > 0:43:10My husband was affected badly.
0:43:12 > 0:43:15He lived with this and tried so hard.
0:43:16 > 0:43:19But then he couldn't deal with it any more.
0:43:20 > 0:43:23We were together 35 years.
0:43:25 > 0:43:31And in 1980, by husband took his life.
0:43:44 > 0:43:49He wrote me a letter. And he said...
0:43:51 > 0:43:54.."Dearest, I can't go on.
0:43:54 > 0:43:59"I'm being haunted every day of my life.
0:43:59 > 0:44:01"Forgive me."
0:44:03 > 0:44:05And he was gone.
0:44:07 > 0:44:11I thought after I lived through a concentration camp,
0:44:11 > 0:44:14my life would be stable but it wasn't.
0:44:14 > 0:44:16I miss him.
0:44:18 > 0:44:20He would be very proud of me.
0:44:27 > 0:44:30In spite of everything, I love life.
0:44:30 > 0:44:33I think I was spared for a reason.
0:44:33 > 0:44:38I was lucky to have children, such wonderful children
0:44:38 > 0:44:44and it's hard to see that my children are affected
0:44:44 > 0:44:50by having their parents being victims of those dramatic times.
0:44:50 > 0:44:52It's not an easy task for them.
0:44:52 > 0:44:58People have said to me, "Vivian, you know, you weren't in the Holocaust.
0:44:58 > 0:45:01"Your parents were in the Holocaust."
0:45:01 > 0:45:04And I know that, intellectually, I know that.
0:45:04 > 0:45:07But emotionally, at times, talking about it,
0:45:07 > 0:45:10not that I can picture myself physically there
0:45:10 > 0:45:15but I can feel the pain that my parents went through.
0:45:15 > 0:45:19In a way, I know that some day when I'm gone, I'll have peace
0:45:19 > 0:45:22because I know my parents and my family
0:45:22 > 0:45:25and my dear friends will be not forgotten.
0:45:33 > 0:45:36For Helen it's time to bring closure
0:45:36 > 0:45:40but for me, it was not closure for me.
0:45:43 > 0:45:49I think it was the beginning of another life,
0:45:49 > 0:45:53a life where I am able to live with the truth.
0:46:05 > 0:46:08Tomorrow I'll go home.
0:46:19 > 0:46:22I know my husband,
0:46:22 > 0:46:26he'll ask me what do you say about Helen?
0:46:26 > 0:46:31I know that because he told me to go, go and see her.
0:46:32 > 0:46:35Oh, I'll say I will tell you
0:46:35 > 0:46:39but we will need a long time till everything is set.
0:46:53 > 0:46:56My little grandson, David,
0:46:56 > 0:46:59I'm teaching him everybody is the same.
0:46:59 > 0:47:02It doesn't matter in what religion you believe.
0:47:02 > 0:47:05It doesn't matter if you're black or white.
0:47:07 > 0:47:09THEY SPEAK GERMAN
0:47:17 > 0:47:22When David is at school and he'll learn
0:47:22 > 0:47:24about the Second World War,
0:47:24 > 0:47:29I'll tell him about his great grandfather.
0:47:30 > 0:47:35But I think for him, it won't be so hurtful.
0:47:35 > 0:47:38I am convinced it will be better
0:47:38 > 0:47:42for the generation which is growing up now.
0:47:51 > 0:47:54I don't have many belongings from my father,
0:47:54 > 0:47:59just two cufflinks
0:47:59 > 0:48:05and my mother gave it to me when I was about 15 years old.
0:48:07 > 0:48:10And beside his photograph,
0:48:10 > 0:48:15she had this cigarette case.
0:48:16 > 0:48:21And I asked her, "Is this from the Jews?"
0:48:22 > 0:48:26And she said, "No, it's from your grandfather,"
0:48:26 > 0:48:30but now I don't know, I...
0:48:31 > 0:48:34I wouldn't believe anything anymore.
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