0:00:02 > 0:00:04It's the last thing we want to think about -
0:00:04 > 0:00:06our funeral.
0:00:06 > 0:00:10But we all have very different thoughts about the way we want to go.
0:00:12 > 0:00:14"When the sun sets on the ocean blue,
0:00:14 > 0:00:16"remember me as I will always remember you."
0:00:16 > 0:00:18God bless, Mum.
0:00:20 > 0:00:24For some people, though, death is very much their way of life...
0:00:26 > 0:00:27..and they love their work.
0:00:28 > 0:00:32We care for the dead, but we are there to help the families.
0:00:32 > 0:00:35And I can't imagine a more rewarding job.
0:00:38 > 0:00:41Welcome to a world that most of us will never see.
0:00:43 > 0:00:48We're opening the doors on A Very Welsh Undertaking.
0:00:49 > 0:00:53This programme contains some scenes which viewers may find upsetting.
0:01:17 > 0:01:19The historic village of Laugharne
0:01:19 > 0:01:22and a special funeral today being arranged
0:01:22 > 0:01:24by local funeral director Stuart Booth.
0:01:26 > 0:01:29Today, we've got the funeral of a squadron leader.
0:01:29 > 0:01:32He was up pilot, an RAF pilot, in World War II.
0:01:32 > 0:01:34He is a well-known figure of the area.
0:01:34 > 0:01:36We've got a set up ready for the funeral later,
0:01:36 > 0:01:39but there's about 100 things going through my mind at the moment.
0:01:39 > 0:01:41Making sure every little detail is ready.
0:01:41 > 0:01:43Make sure everything is in place.
0:01:43 > 0:01:46I am waiting for a phone call from the RAF just to say
0:01:46 > 0:01:48whether we've got a fly-past for this service.
0:01:48 > 0:01:49Make sure there's enough seats inside,
0:01:49 > 0:01:51make sure everyone's going to the right place,
0:01:51 > 0:01:54make sure there is a leaflet for the vicar when she turns up.
0:01:54 > 0:01:56Make sure the organist has got the CDs,
0:01:56 > 0:01:58make sure the CD works on the CD player.
0:01:58 > 0:01:59There's everything.
0:02:01 > 0:02:05Everything is going to plan until Stuart spots a problem.
0:02:05 > 0:02:09Workmen have turned up outside the church to close the road.
0:02:09 > 0:02:11Cones are there and we need to park here
0:02:11 > 0:02:12and the cars still need to come through.
0:02:12 > 0:02:15So, we're just going to double-check with the men in the lorry...
0:02:15 > 0:02:18in the van there to make sure they're not going to be too long
0:02:18 > 0:02:20and this is all gone by the time we turn up.
0:02:23 > 0:02:26Stuart tries to find out exactly what's happening.
0:02:30 > 0:02:33So, will the road be open in time for the funeral?
0:02:34 > 0:02:37Yeah, it's all OK. They're going to check that the connection
0:02:37 > 0:02:39for the phone is all right and they'll be gone in
0:02:39 > 0:02:42about ten minutes, quarter of an hour, so panic over.
0:02:42 > 0:02:44MOBILE PHONE RINGS And Stuart gets more good news
0:02:44 > 0:02:45about the funeral.
0:02:45 > 0:02:47Hello. How are you doing? Yeah, fairly good.
0:02:49 > 0:02:51Oh, that would be brilliant.
0:02:51 > 0:02:53At two o'clock. Yeah, that would be absolutely fine.
0:02:53 > 0:02:54Thanks a lot. Goodbye.
0:02:55 > 0:02:58That was the gentleman from the Airman's Association.
0:02:58 > 0:03:00Fair play, he's worked hard all week
0:03:00 > 0:03:04and he has arranged a fly-past, which we were hoping for.
0:03:04 > 0:03:08He can't come at three o'clock, which that's what we really wanted,
0:03:08 > 0:03:10but it's going to be fine. We can...
0:03:10 > 0:03:12At two o'clock, we'll turn up at the gate
0:03:12 > 0:03:14and hopefully, the planes will go over just at the right time.
0:03:14 > 0:03:17So, yeah, that's a big relief.
0:03:20 > 0:03:22With everything now on course at the church,
0:03:22 > 0:03:25Stuart heads back to base to make final preparations
0:03:25 > 0:03:28for today's unique funeral.
0:03:30 > 0:03:33This is our first funeral going from our new premises,
0:03:33 > 0:03:37so it's all a bit different and, you know, a bit anxious,
0:03:37 > 0:03:38make sure everything goes right.
0:03:38 > 0:03:41Yeah, there's nothing to worry about, but you can never relax
0:03:41 > 0:03:43when you've got a... You know, we wouldn't be doing our job
0:03:43 > 0:03:47correctly if we were relaxing and not worrying about it at all.
0:03:47 > 0:03:50From here, the hearse will be arriving now in about five minutes
0:03:50 > 0:03:53or so and we will load the coffin into the hearse,
0:03:53 > 0:03:55make sure the flowers are correct on top.
0:03:55 > 0:03:56Now, we've got a cap that is going
0:03:56 > 0:03:58on top of the coffin, make sure that is in place.
0:03:58 > 0:04:00The limousines will be here.
0:04:00 > 0:04:02Because they've got the colourful coffin
0:04:02 > 0:04:04with his planes printed all over on the side of it,
0:04:04 > 0:04:06we're going to have a few minutes at the house,
0:04:06 > 0:04:08so they can check the coffin and have a good look at it.
0:04:08 > 0:04:11They may want to take the odd photo or something.
0:04:11 > 0:04:14And then we are going to move off down to the church and arrive there
0:04:14 > 0:04:17at precisely five to, so that we've got couple of minutes
0:04:17 > 0:04:18to get everything set up
0:04:18 > 0:04:21and then the fly-past should happen at two o'clock.
0:04:21 > 0:04:24That's the way it's planned. Let's hope it goes like that.
0:04:30 > 0:04:33Today, more than ever, timing is crucial.
0:04:37 > 0:04:39The Royal British Legion
0:04:39 > 0:04:42and most of the village of Laugharne have turned out at the local
0:04:42 > 0:04:44church to pay their last respects
0:04:44 > 0:04:47to 95-year-old former squadron leader Leslie Davies,
0:04:47 > 0:04:51war hero and valued member of the community.
0:04:51 > 0:04:54Anticipation is building as they all hope to catch
0:04:54 > 0:04:56a glimpse of the RAF fly-past.
0:04:58 > 0:05:01With military precision, they are right on time.
0:05:01 > 0:05:04A fitting tribute to an old airman.
0:05:08 > 0:05:12"Those who believe in me, even though they die, will live."
0:05:16 > 0:05:18He was a churchwarden at this church.
0:05:18 > 0:05:21He's helped us out in many, many funerals over the years,
0:05:21 > 0:05:23so it's a great honour to do this funeral.
0:05:23 > 0:05:26It's a great honour to do any funeral, but this one,
0:05:26 > 0:05:29it really... He has helped us out for years and years and years.
0:05:29 > 0:05:33He is 95 and we always worried after his days
0:05:33 > 0:05:36how we are going to carry on in the church cos you only spoke to Les
0:05:36 > 0:05:38and Les sorted everything, so...
0:05:47 > 0:05:50Squadron leader Leslie Davies is being laid
0:05:50 > 0:05:52to rest in the peaceful churchyard.
0:05:58 > 0:06:02His old friends and colleagues gather for the committal
0:06:02 > 0:06:04under Stuart's watchful eye.
0:06:04 > 0:06:08And there is no relaxing until everything comes to a close.
0:06:09 > 0:06:12For a former military man, it is appropriate that he can have
0:06:12 > 0:06:15the Last Post played as a final farewell.
0:06:15 > 0:06:18The age-old piece recognises and symbolises
0:06:18 > 0:06:22that the duty of the deceased soldier is over
0:06:22 > 0:06:25and can now officially rest in peace.
0:06:28 > 0:06:30BUGLE PLAYS THE LAST POST
0:06:48 > 0:06:50Tovey Brothers in Newport have a rich history of dealing
0:06:50 > 0:06:55with the deceased and their ancient ledgers date back to the 1860s
0:06:55 > 0:06:59recording all of the funerals the Tovey family have carried out.
0:06:59 > 0:07:04Thousands and thousands of family names are written on these pages.
0:07:04 > 0:07:07There are some really interesting history in some of these books
0:07:07 > 0:07:10and local history, but also from further afield.
0:07:10 > 0:07:15Every ledger records the funeral that we've carried out
0:07:15 > 0:07:17and they are all dated from the months and years
0:07:17 > 0:07:19that they relate to.
0:07:19 > 0:07:21And then there are smaller indexes,
0:07:21 > 0:07:26which enable us to look up alphabetically people's names
0:07:26 > 0:07:28and then reference to these particular books.
0:07:28 > 0:07:31So, quite quickly, we can refer to one of these books
0:07:31 > 0:07:33and whenever we carry out a funeral,
0:07:33 > 0:07:36we reference back to the last funeral for that family
0:07:36 > 0:07:39where it's a close relation, so we can see the history
0:07:39 > 0:07:42of the service we've given to that particular family.
0:07:44 > 0:07:46When you look at the numbers of people
0:07:46 > 0:07:49written in black and white, if you look through an index of this,
0:07:49 > 0:07:52and you look, there is thousands and thousands of names of people.
0:07:52 > 0:07:54It's incredible to think of the history
0:07:54 > 0:07:58and the number of families that have been looked after
0:07:58 > 0:08:00by our family, really.
0:08:01 > 0:08:05Sadly, the names of all my family members are in these books as well,
0:08:05 > 0:08:07so I've been able to look up some of the funerals
0:08:07 > 0:08:09of my grandfather and great-grandfather
0:08:09 > 0:08:12and other members of the family that have gone before us.
0:08:12 > 0:08:14So, that's interesting for me on a personal level,
0:08:14 > 0:08:18but it does underline the fact that no, it doesn't spare any of us
0:08:18 > 0:08:21and no doubt one day, hopefully not too soon,
0:08:21 > 0:08:24my own name will be in one of these books.
0:08:24 > 0:08:28That's one certainty in life we all know about, isn't it, so...
0:08:28 > 0:08:30It's interesting to see how customs change
0:08:30 > 0:08:32and how elaborate funerals are.
0:08:32 > 0:08:36Now, obviously, people are choosing extra things
0:08:36 > 0:08:39like, perhaps, dove releases or alternative vehicles.
0:08:39 > 0:08:42It's an interesting social history looking back at this sort of thing.
0:08:44 > 0:08:49Today, James Tovey has a very special motorbike-themed funeral.
0:08:49 > 0:08:51Brian Johnson passed away from a sudden illness.
0:08:51 > 0:08:56He loved his bikes, so he is having a very appropriate final ride.
0:08:58 > 0:09:00So, we are travelling out with our hearse
0:09:00 > 0:09:03and the motorbike hearse to the family home.
0:09:03 > 0:09:06And I think there will be quite a few biker friends of the man
0:09:06 > 0:09:08who has passed away
0:09:08 > 0:09:11and they are going to lead the procession to the church.
0:09:11 > 0:09:14And we will have a service in a local village church followed
0:09:14 > 0:09:16by a burial at the cemetery then.
0:09:18 > 0:09:21In charge of the motorbike hearse is Andy.
0:09:21 > 0:09:25But do you have to be a biker to ride in this hearse?
0:09:25 > 0:09:26We probably give a final ride
0:09:26 > 0:09:29to as many old ladies as motorcyclists.
0:09:29 > 0:09:31Whether it's a final farewell to the world on account that
0:09:31 > 0:09:34they weren't allowed motorbikes in their youth, we have no idea.
0:09:34 > 0:09:37We haven't...haven't quite got our head around that yet.
0:09:37 > 0:09:40It's effectively giving people their last chance to say goodbye
0:09:40 > 0:09:41to the world with something,
0:09:41 > 0:09:43which they've always had a lot of passion for.
0:09:43 > 0:09:45You spend all of your life riding a motorbike,
0:09:45 > 0:09:47why would you want to go to your final resting place
0:09:47 > 0:09:49in back of an estate car?
0:09:49 > 0:09:52It's that ability to say farewell in your own terms.
0:09:55 > 0:09:58We are expecting quite a few people cos he was a young man
0:09:58 > 0:10:00and a well-known man, well popular.
0:10:00 > 0:10:03So, I hope it all goes well for the family.
0:10:03 > 0:10:06And the motorcycle hearse is obviously because he loved bikes
0:10:06 > 0:10:08and we've got a few other touches like that,
0:10:08 > 0:10:10which, hopefully, make it personal for him
0:10:10 > 0:10:12and a good tribute to him.
0:10:12 > 0:10:14MOTORCYCLES REV
0:10:18 > 0:10:20I guess when you do personalise the funerals,
0:10:20 > 0:10:22it does make it a little bit more poignant
0:10:22 > 0:10:24and therefore, more emotional.
0:10:24 > 0:10:27But I think everyone is pleased
0:10:27 > 0:10:29afterwards that they've gone to that extra step.
0:10:29 > 0:10:32And you, at the time, I think,
0:10:32 > 0:10:34it could be a bit more upsetting.
0:10:37 > 0:10:40Brian's extended biking family accompany him
0:10:40 > 0:10:42to his final resting place in Newport.
0:10:44 > 0:10:46For undertakers like James Tovey,
0:10:46 > 0:10:49requests that may once have seemed strange and unusual
0:10:49 > 0:10:51are far more commonplace.
0:10:51 > 0:10:55His job is often, now, to try and fulfil last requests
0:10:55 > 0:11:00and Brian's biker-themed funeral runs as smoothly as one of his bikes.
0:11:03 > 0:11:05With burials on the decrease
0:11:05 > 0:11:09and cremations accounting for over 70% of funerals in Wales,
0:11:09 > 0:11:13Llanelli Crematorium is a very busy place.
0:11:13 > 0:11:15But what happens when that curtain closes?
0:11:19 > 0:11:23Manager Kevin Davies oversees more than 1,000 cremations every year.
0:11:25 > 0:11:26Some people can deal with it
0:11:26 > 0:11:28and from my experiences, some people can't.
0:11:28 > 0:11:31But it's not easy. It's a very difficult job.
0:11:31 > 0:11:33I never tell anybody what I do.
0:11:34 > 0:11:36When the funeral arrives,
0:11:36 > 0:11:39the details of the deceased are checked on the coffin
0:11:39 > 0:11:42and this is a continual process throughout the operation.
0:11:42 > 0:11:45Once the curtains have closed towards the end of the service
0:11:45 > 0:11:48or at the committal, the coffin is left there in place
0:11:48 > 0:11:51until the family and the bereaved have left the service.
0:11:51 > 0:11:53Once, this has happened,
0:11:53 > 0:11:56we take the coffin as carefully as we can through the back
0:11:56 > 0:11:59into the crematory through a back door, obviously.
0:11:59 > 0:12:01Back behind the curtains
0:12:01 > 0:12:03where it is then charged into the cremator.
0:12:07 > 0:12:09Once we come to charge the coffin,
0:12:09 > 0:12:12the coffin is placed in a cremator once the slot is available.
0:12:12 > 0:12:15The process could take up to an average of 90 minutes
0:12:15 > 0:12:17until the cremation is completely finished
0:12:17 > 0:12:21and there is flame or anything left in the cremator.
0:12:21 > 0:12:23Then it is raked down to where the ashes are removed
0:12:23 > 0:12:27into a cooling vessel where they cool for up to an hour.
0:12:27 > 0:12:30They are then released from the cremator
0:12:30 > 0:12:32into the normal atmosphere, the normal environment
0:12:32 > 0:12:33where they are cooled
0:12:33 > 0:12:36before they are processed through the cremulator for the final ashes
0:12:36 > 0:12:39to be returned to the family.
0:12:39 > 0:12:41Coffins are made for cremation.
0:12:41 > 0:12:44Their pins and screws and all parts that hold it together
0:12:44 > 0:12:47don't actually go in the process of cremation,
0:12:47 > 0:12:49so that is removed with a magnet.
0:12:49 > 0:12:51The ash is then processed through a cremulator
0:12:51 > 0:12:54where they are reduced to the dust
0:12:54 > 0:12:56as we know as the remains of the ashes.
0:12:56 > 0:12:59That is then processed for the family in either caskets
0:12:59 > 0:13:02or whatever vessel. It depends on what the requirements are.
0:13:04 > 0:13:06The process is very carefully monitored.
0:13:06 > 0:13:08We operate within a code of practice.
0:13:08 > 0:13:10The cremator is individual.
0:13:10 > 0:13:13It is one cremation at a time, one rake down at a time,
0:13:13 > 0:13:17so each of the individual processes is unique to that cremation.
0:13:17 > 0:13:21So the ashes coming back to you are those of your loved one.
0:13:21 > 0:13:24At the end of the day, when I've passed away, then I've passed away.
0:13:24 > 0:13:26If the family choose cremation, that's fine.
0:13:26 > 0:13:30But whatever they choose, that is down to them, it's their decision.
0:13:33 > 0:13:35Gareth Jenkins from Baglan Funeral Home
0:13:35 > 0:13:39is on his way to deliver an urn of very special ashes.
0:13:39 > 0:13:41Sometimes they come to the funeral home to pick them up,
0:13:41 > 0:13:44but the family asked if I could just take them down
0:13:44 > 0:13:47and have a chat what they would like to do with them.
0:13:48 > 0:13:50At their home in Sandfields, Port Talbot,
0:13:50 > 0:13:53the family of Damien James, who tragically ended his own life
0:13:53 > 0:13:58just four weeks ago, is expecting Gareth's visit.
0:13:58 > 0:13:59It's a very poignant time.
0:13:59 > 0:14:02It's like the final thing, the ashes remains.
0:14:02 > 0:14:07So I don't like knocking the door with them in my hand.
0:14:07 > 0:14:09They are expecting me and they are expecting me
0:14:09 > 0:14:12to have the ashes, but I say, "Look, I have them in the car.
0:14:12 > 0:14:14"Are you ready?" so to speak.
0:14:14 > 0:14:18Cos maybe when I knock the door, they might start crying,
0:14:18 > 0:14:20you don't know and then I'll go in and have a chat with them
0:14:20 > 0:14:23and then I'll fetch them.
0:14:23 > 0:14:25- I've got his ashes remains in the car.- Oh, that's OK.
0:14:25 > 0:14:28- Are you OK to have them now? - Yes, definitely. Definitely.
0:14:28 > 0:14:30OK, I'll just fetch them now. OK.
0:14:32 > 0:14:34'You've got to gauge how they are
0:14:34 > 0:14:37'cos you don't know until they're actually face to face
0:14:37 > 0:14:40'and they know that the ashes remains are coming, you know.
0:14:40 > 0:14:44'Damien is sort of coming home again, in one respect, you know.
0:14:44 > 0:14:46'It brings it all back home again.
0:14:46 > 0:14:49'So, I think they are actually looking forward to
0:14:49 > 0:14:51'having something of him back.'
0:14:53 > 0:14:55OK?
0:14:55 > 0:14:58- OK. Shall I put them here? Is that OK?- Thank you, Gareth.
0:14:58 > 0:14:59Yeah.
0:14:59 > 0:15:02- There he is back home. OK?- Aww.
0:15:02 > 0:15:07- It has been a long four weeks, but he's home now.- Yeah.
0:15:07 > 0:15:10You think, "Oh, I'm hard, I can do it," but...
0:15:10 > 0:15:11No, one minute you're fine,
0:15:11 > 0:15:14- it's one little thing you need and it sets you off again.- Yeah.
0:15:14 > 0:15:18You have to get on with day-to-day jobs and day-to-day things,
0:15:18 > 0:15:20- cos we've got a little six-year-old as well.- Yeah.
0:15:20 > 0:15:22We went shopping
0:15:22 > 0:15:26and it's just like a bit of music that they play over the system
0:15:26 > 0:15:29and the two of us, again, were both...
0:15:29 > 0:15:31You know, you're walking round sobbing and you think,
0:15:31 > 0:15:34- "Oh, I'm being a bit daft," but... - No, no.
0:15:34 > 0:15:36- We were, weren't we?- Mm.
0:15:36 > 0:15:40I know you wanted to...you wanted to divide the ashes,
0:15:40 > 0:15:43so we're going to divide them in half
0:15:43 > 0:15:46and then we've got little scatter boxes, which...
0:15:46 > 0:15:49You see the little hole there?
0:15:49 > 0:15:52- Aww.- See him down in there? Look.
0:15:52 > 0:15:53Aww.
0:15:53 > 0:15:55- Do you want to feel it?- No, I'm OK.
0:15:55 > 0:15:58- Feel it.- It's just like sand. - It's just like sand. Look.
0:15:59 > 0:16:02- Here he is, look.- Aww.- He's home.
0:16:02 > 0:16:04- It's quite heavy, isn't it? - It's bone, isn't it?
0:16:04 > 0:16:07People are surprised at the actual weight.
0:16:07 > 0:16:09But do you know, almost it doesn't matter
0:16:09 > 0:16:12- what size you physically are... - Yeah.
0:16:12 > 0:16:15..they're almost all identical in weight afterwards,
0:16:15 > 0:16:16which is weird, isn't it?
0:16:16 > 0:16:18Well, I sup... Yeah, cos your skeleton would be...
0:16:18 > 0:16:20It's the bone, it's the bone.
0:16:20 > 0:16:21It is just the padding around that.
0:16:21 > 0:16:23- You don't need that padding after, do you?- No.
0:16:23 > 0:16:26- HE LAUGHS - No. No, we don't.- Oh, love him.
0:16:26 > 0:16:30- It's the only time I'll be ever slim, then. - THEY LAUGH
0:16:30 > 0:16:32So, I'm going to leave you with these now
0:16:32 > 0:16:34- for you to have a look at. - Oh, thank you.
0:16:34 > 0:16:37And then you just give me a ring a I'll pop down
0:16:37 > 0:16:39after you've decided what you'd like to do.
0:16:39 > 0:16:42- Oh, thank you very much, Gareth. - OK? You're welcome.- Thank you.
0:16:44 > 0:16:47Everyone's individual, every scenario's different,
0:16:47 > 0:16:50so, yeah, we've got to gauge everything separately.
0:16:50 > 0:16:54It all depends on how their emotions are at that time.
0:16:54 > 0:16:56Sometimes the emotions are very high,
0:16:56 > 0:16:58sometimes they're very low.
0:16:58 > 0:17:00Yeah, we just gauge that and like I said,
0:17:00 > 0:17:03because we are there to help them in anything we can do,
0:17:03 > 0:17:06we just try to take into consideration
0:17:06 > 0:17:07their feelings at that time.
0:17:10 > 0:17:12With funeral trends changing in Wales,
0:17:12 > 0:17:16so too are what families decide to do with the ashes of their loved ones.
0:17:16 > 0:17:21From glass sculptures to diamonds, the list continues to grow.
0:17:21 > 0:17:24Wayne died last year and Gareth conducted the funeral
0:17:24 > 0:17:27and believes his service does not end there.
0:17:27 > 0:17:30Today, he's helping Wayne's partner, Barbara,
0:17:30 > 0:17:32who has decided to get the ashes made into a crystal
0:17:32 > 0:17:36which she will have implanted in her arm.
0:17:36 > 0:17:40The "Wayne" is written in just tattooist's ink.
0:17:40 > 0:17:45The hearts there, the ashes were mixed with the ink
0:17:45 > 0:17:47and then made into the hearts.
0:17:47 > 0:17:50And also the star as well is done in the same thing.
0:17:50 > 0:17:53And in the centre here, that is where the crystal is going to go
0:17:53 > 0:17:55and it will be a permanent thing then.
0:17:55 > 0:17:59Somebody in work told me that you can add crystals.
0:17:59 > 0:18:01I thought, "Oh, I know, I'll have...
0:18:01 > 0:18:03"If you can make a crystal out of the ashes,
0:18:03 > 0:18:06- "I'll have that put instead." - Yeah.- So...
0:18:06 > 0:18:08- And you immediately thought, "That's for me"?- Yes.
0:18:08 > 0:18:11- And you haven't had any second thoughts at all?- Not so.
0:18:11 > 0:18:14There we are. Well, I think that is really nice, then.
0:18:16 > 0:18:19Human ashes can be compressed into real diamonds,
0:18:19 > 0:18:24an expensive process that can cost upwards of £10,000.
0:18:25 > 0:18:28Got to be very quiet for this bit, OK?
0:18:28 > 0:18:31Barbara has chosen the more reasonable option -
0:18:31 > 0:18:34having the ashes embedded in crystals that resemble diamonds.
0:18:39 > 0:18:42- And that's your pain over with. - Really? - THEY LAUGH
0:18:42 > 0:18:44- Well done, Barbara. - TATTOOIST LAUGHS
0:18:44 > 0:18:47No screaming at all. I'm a bit disappointed. Yeah.
0:18:47 > 0:18:51So, the ashes are in that diamond, in a star,
0:18:51 > 0:18:54and his ashes are in the star there.
0:18:54 > 0:18:58- Amazing.- Shining bright like a diamond in the sky.- It is.
0:18:58 > 0:19:00That looks great, that does, actually.
0:19:07 > 0:19:10Every two years, all the funeral directors
0:19:10 > 0:19:12visit the National Funeral Exhibition
0:19:12 > 0:19:15to keep up-to-date with latest trends and suppliers.
0:19:15 > 0:19:18After all, funerals are big business.
0:19:25 > 0:19:27Hefin Williams from the Gwendraeth Valley
0:19:27 > 0:19:31has brought his wife, Angharad, on a surprise romantic break.
0:19:31 > 0:19:33Hmm, is it worked Angharad had in mind?
0:19:35 > 0:19:37Hefin said he was going to take me away
0:19:37 > 0:19:39for a lovely weekend somewhere nice
0:19:39 > 0:19:42and this wasn't exactly what I had in mind
0:19:42 > 0:19:45when he told me I was going somewhere nice.
0:19:46 > 0:19:51When I told Angharad I was taking her away for a night or two,
0:19:51 > 0:19:53I think this was the last place she wanted to come.
0:19:53 > 0:19:55But fair play, she has supported me.
0:19:59 > 0:20:02This year, I am building a new chapel of rest in the funeral home,
0:20:02 > 0:20:06so I need to kit it all out.
0:20:06 > 0:20:10I am looking for mortuary equipment, fridges, flooring, everything.
0:20:10 > 0:20:14A display for ashes. Ashes is a big thing at the moment.
0:20:14 > 0:20:16You can have them into anything these days.
0:20:16 > 0:20:18Hopefully I can get the best prices.
0:20:25 > 0:20:26As well as suppliers,
0:20:26 > 0:20:30a trade association for independent funeral directors, known as SAIF,
0:20:30 > 0:20:32are also here.
0:20:32 > 0:20:34And manning the stand is this year's president
0:20:34 > 0:20:37and funeral director from Llanelli, Gemma O'Driscoll.
0:20:39 > 0:20:43It is also a networking opportunity, a chance to see funeral directors
0:20:43 > 0:20:46who perhaps you don't see from one year to the next.
0:20:46 > 0:20:49Really, it is all-encompassing. Vehicles as well, of course.
0:20:49 > 0:20:52There's a lot of very lovely and very expensive funeral cars
0:20:52 > 0:20:54here this weekend.
0:20:55 > 0:20:59Matthew Jones from Carmarthen hires hearses to funeral directors
0:20:59 > 0:21:01and is admiring the latest models.
0:21:02 > 0:21:04Fancy one. If somebody else is paying, it's all right.
0:21:04 > 0:21:07Quite a lot of money's worth here, to be honest with you.
0:21:09 > 0:21:12I don't think you'll see... You won't see these in my garage.
0:21:12 > 0:21:14Unless I win the lottery.
0:21:14 > 0:21:19As far as the Jaguar goes - lovely, great, got a presence on the road.
0:21:19 > 0:21:21But a lot of the roads we go down in West Wales,
0:21:21 > 0:21:23down the countries there, down the farms,
0:21:23 > 0:21:25wouldn't fit down the lanes
0:21:25 > 0:21:27and also, probably get stuck on the cattle grids.
0:21:29 > 0:21:32As well as trying his hand at wicker coffin weaving,
0:21:32 > 0:21:36Gareth Jenkins from Baglan is searching for something special
0:21:36 > 0:21:38for one of his clients.
0:21:38 > 0:21:40I'm looking for one thing in particular.
0:21:40 > 0:21:44Now, there are companies here that do fireworks
0:21:44 > 0:21:48that you can actually put the ashes remains into the firework
0:21:48 > 0:21:52and they will organise a firework display.
0:21:52 > 0:21:56Damien's family have asked me to look for something different
0:21:56 > 0:22:00and something spectacular and I think that would be just the answer.
0:22:00 > 0:22:01That's what I'm looking for now.
0:22:06 > 0:22:08Although most skills in the funeral trade
0:22:08 > 0:22:10are passed down over generations,
0:22:10 > 0:22:14undertaking is now becoming more and more professional
0:22:14 > 0:22:17and formal qualifications are a necessity.
0:22:19 > 0:22:22And there will be time to ask questions...
0:22:22 > 0:22:23Gemma O'Driscoll is a tutor for
0:22:23 > 0:22:26the Independent Funeral Directors College,
0:22:26 > 0:22:29which trains the next generation of funeral directors.
0:22:29 > 0:22:31We have a number of students here who have travelled
0:22:31 > 0:22:34from all over South Wales and with a variety of experience
0:22:34 > 0:22:40to gather here today to begin their journey on courses with the college.
0:22:40 > 0:22:41You demonstrate to me
0:22:41 > 0:22:47how you would measure our very well-dressed deceased.
0:22:47 > 0:22:50Because it is a vocational qualification, they are expected now
0:22:50 > 0:22:54to go back to their workplaces and compile portfolios of evidence
0:22:54 > 0:22:58that prove their competence in the tasks that we are speaking about.
0:23:02 > 0:23:04A number of staff from the Baglan Funeral Home
0:23:04 > 0:23:06have undertaken the course.
0:23:06 > 0:23:08One of them, Neil,
0:23:08 > 0:23:12is nervously awaiting a workplace evaluation with his tutor Gemma.
0:23:12 > 0:23:15- Afternoon, Gemma.- Hi, nice to see you again.- Are you all right?
0:23:15 > 0:23:16- Yeah, I'm fine.- Good.
0:23:16 > 0:23:18- Take a seat. Don't be nervous. - No, it's OK.
0:23:18 > 0:23:22We're just going to go through some of your workbooks
0:23:22 > 0:23:23that you've sent in to me.
0:23:23 > 0:23:25I am very pleased to tell you that at this stage,
0:23:25 > 0:23:27you have passed the course.
0:23:27 > 0:23:29- It is really quite excellent work. - Thank you very much.
0:23:29 > 0:23:32- So, congratulations. - Brilliant, thank you.- OK.
0:23:32 > 0:23:34Over the moon that I've passed the course.
0:23:34 > 0:23:37It was an exciting course to do, being new to the job and everything.
0:23:37 > 0:23:41And the help I had on the course and everything has been really great,
0:23:41 > 0:23:43the support from other people who'd done the course with me.
0:23:43 > 0:23:45Um...
0:23:45 > 0:23:48And I've had a really good mentor with my colleagues working here.
0:23:48 > 0:23:50- GARETH:- Hello, Gemma. Nice to see you.
0:23:50 > 0:23:55And while at Baglan Funeral Home, Gemma fulfils another of her roles -
0:23:55 > 0:23:58Inspector of Standards for Funeral Directors.
0:23:58 > 0:24:00Then we'll do the viewing rooms, then we'll go into the mortuary.
0:24:00 > 0:24:04- Yes.- That OK?- That's fine. - There we are now.
0:24:04 > 0:24:06'I belong to a trade association called SAIF
0:24:06 > 0:24:10'and the inspector is coming here to make sure that
0:24:10 > 0:24:14'we adhere to all their rules and that everything is in place -
0:24:14 > 0:24:19'health and safety, fire inspection, premises inspection, the mortuary -
0:24:19 > 0:24:22'just to see that everything is in order.'
0:24:22 > 0:24:27This is the mortuary-cum-cold room where we carry out the embalming.
0:24:27 > 0:24:31'And they just keep us up-to-date and if we do have a problem,'
0:24:31 > 0:24:34we've got a governing body that we can actually turn to to help us.
0:24:34 > 0:24:37They've got legal department as well,
0:24:37 > 0:24:40so we've always got somebody we can have advice from.
0:24:40 > 0:24:43So, what storage did you have, Gareth?
0:24:43 > 0:24:47Well, what we've done, we've made this whole area a refrigerate...
0:24:47 > 0:24:52This is refrigerated and we've put the curtains on and if we are...
0:24:52 > 0:24:57we need more space, this whole room is insulated as a fridge.
0:24:57 > 0:25:01And we can accommodate, at max, 26 people.
0:25:01 > 0:25:03Perhaps if we can...
0:25:03 > 0:25:05Just give me a few minutes to just go through
0:25:05 > 0:25:07and check if I've got everything
0:25:07 > 0:25:08and then I can give a decision.
0:25:08 > 0:25:12- Do I give you the bribe now or later? - SHE CHUCKLES
0:25:15 > 0:25:16Mmm.
0:25:18 > 0:25:21To be honest, I'm not too worried. I'm sure everything's in place.
0:25:21 > 0:25:24It seems that everything's in place, but you always think,
0:25:24 > 0:25:26are they going to pick you up on something?
0:25:26 > 0:25:31And if they do, I'm sure, you know, it can be put right.
0:25:31 > 0:25:33So, it is not quite like waiting in a dentist
0:25:33 > 0:25:36if you've got to have a filling or an extraction.
0:25:36 > 0:25:38But, yeah, you know, we just...
0:25:38 > 0:25:40I'm sure everything's all right. Quite confident.
0:25:42 > 0:25:47I think it is important that we are inspected and we do belong to SAIF.
0:25:47 > 0:25:49You don't have to belong to an association
0:25:49 > 0:25:51to actually be a funeral director.
0:25:51 > 0:25:54I think it is a safeguard for families.
0:25:54 > 0:25:56I think they feel more confident in coming to you.
0:25:58 > 0:25:59- Hi, Gemma.- All right.
0:25:59 > 0:26:01So, is it...? Or is it...?
0:26:01 > 0:26:03It's good news, Gareth.
0:26:03 > 0:26:06I'm very pleased to tell you that everything is in order.
0:26:06 > 0:26:08I really can't find anything wrong. I've tried hard.
0:26:08 > 0:26:12- HE CHUCKLES - But, no, honestly, you have got superb premises here.
0:26:12 > 0:26:14- Thanks very much. - Standards are very high
0:26:14 > 0:26:16and we are very pleased to have you as members.
0:26:16 > 0:26:18Thank you very much. That is a good news, that.
0:26:22 > 0:26:26As the sun slowly sets over Swansea Bay,
0:26:26 > 0:26:29so does Dionne's time with her son's ashes.
0:26:29 > 0:26:32Damien is in her arms for the final time.
0:26:32 > 0:26:35The family asked me if they could do something unusual
0:26:35 > 0:26:40with Damien's ashes remains and there is this company I found,
0:26:40 > 0:26:43Heavenly Stars, have come up with a wonderful product.
0:26:43 > 0:26:46It's the Celebration of Life fireworks
0:26:46 > 0:26:49where they took Damien's ashes and they've placed them
0:26:49 > 0:26:51in quite a lot of fireworks.
0:26:51 > 0:26:56We are just waiting for dark so that he can be sent on his final journey
0:26:56 > 0:27:00in a blaze of colour and stars and the family are here to witness that
0:27:00 > 0:27:05and I think we're going to raise a glass or two of bubbly.
0:27:05 > 0:27:08I think what a lovely final thing to do.
0:27:08 > 0:27:12I'm looking forward to the firework going off, but I'm also sad
0:27:12 > 0:27:17because it is another way of saying goodbye to him, really. So...
0:27:19 > 0:27:22But it is to commemorate him and this is why we're doing it.
0:27:22 > 0:27:27It's a way of saying goodbye to him and he'll always be up in the sky.
0:27:27 > 0:27:32It is a fitting tribute, at the end of the day. Fantastic.
0:27:32 > 0:27:34It has been a difficult journey for the family
0:27:34 > 0:27:36and I've been with them all along.
0:27:36 > 0:27:38They wanted the finality of it
0:27:38 > 0:27:42and I think this will help towards that now, so...
0:27:42 > 0:27:45Yes, I'm so pleased that they've asked me to be here
0:27:45 > 0:27:47and witness it as well.
0:27:48 > 0:27:49Whoo!
0:27:51 > 0:27:53FIREWORKS WHISTLE AND CRACK
0:27:55 > 0:27:59Everybody loves fireworks. They're so spectacular
0:27:59 > 0:28:01and it just makes you smile when you see a firework
0:28:01 > 0:28:04and it is a celebration of life, after all.
0:28:04 > 0:28:08So, yeah, I would be quite happy for my ashes to be sent up in the sky.
0:28:08 > 0:28:10Definitely.
0:28:11 > 0:28:14As a child, he loved fireworks, he just adored them.
0:28:14 > 0:28:18So, when Gareth came up with the idea came to me about it,
0:28:18 > 0:28:21I thought, "Yeah, it's fitting. Let's do it."
0:28:27 > 0:28:30That is something I will remember for the rest of my life.
0:28:30 > 0:28:32Fantastic, amazing.