0:00:02 > 0:00:05I'm Jazz, and everything in my life seems to be changing. Oh, wow!
0:00:06 > 0:00:08Mum has to move house...
0:00:08 > 0:00:12- Oh, yes!- Yes! - This is the place for me.
0:00:12 > 0:00:16I'm going to America to do work experience in an animal hospital.
0:00:16 > 0:00:18So cool!
0:00:18 > 0:00:20And I'm learning how to drive.
0:00:21 > 0:00:23Stop.
0:00:23 > 0:00:25Oh, yes! Oh, yes!
0:00:25 > 0:00:28This is my mum, Bev, and my dad, Paul.
0:00:28 > 0:00:31We're not a typical family.
0:00:31 > 0:00:33Good memories.
0:00:33 > 0:00:36I wish I could have been there.
0:00:36 > 0:00:40I only met my dad for the first time 12 months ago.
0:00:40 > 0:00:44- You OK, Jazz?- Yes.
0:00:44 > 0:00:47There was a good reason Dad wasn't in my life for 16 years.
0:00:47 > 0:00:49Nice one, mate. Thanks a lot.
0:00:49 > 0:00:52He had become a homeless heroin addict.
0:00:52 > 0:00:56I couldn't have come into Jazz and Bev's life while I was like that,
0:00:56 > 0:00:59because they would have hated me.
0:00:59 > 0:01:02Now Dad's on a methadone programme,
0:01:02 > 0:01:05and he's been part of our family for the last year.
0:01:05 > 0:01:09He's smartening up his act and getting his first job in 25 years,
0:01:09 > 0:01:10as a zoo volunteer.
0:01:10 > 0:01:12Chimpanzee World.
0:01:12 > 0:01:16But appearances can be deceptive, and suddenly, our family is blown apart.
0:01:18 > 0:01:22Heroin is evil and it destroys lives.
0:01:23 > 0:01:27This is my world, as a small teen,
0:01:27 > 0:01:29coping with my changing life.
0:01:46 > 0:01:48I'm 17 and having a fantastic time.
0:01:48 > 0:01:50I live at college,
0:01:50 > 0:01:52I have great mates...
0:01:55 > 0:02:00..and like most teenage girls, I love make-up, clothes and animals.
0:02:00 > 0:02:03I'd like to say I do what I want, when I want.
0:02:03 > 0:02:05But that's not strictly true,
0:02:05 > 0:02:09as my size means I'm dependent on others to get around.
0:02:09 > 0:02:11All that's about to change
0:02:11 > 0:02:14because I'm going to put myself in the driving seat.
0:02:17 > 0:02:19Oh, Jazz.
0:02:19 > 0:02:21- Oh, my God.- Tinted window!
0:02:21 > 0:02:24- Look at this.- It's beautiful.
0:02:24 > 0:02:26'I'm registered disabled,
0:02:26 > 0:02:29'so I'm eligible to get a car through the Motability scheme.'
0:02:29 > 0:02:31- Do you want to jump in, Jazz?- Yes!
0:02:31 > 0:02:34- Oh, my God!- Wow!
0:02:35 > 0:02:37'My new car has been specially adapted
0:02:37 > 0:02:41'so I can see over the steering wheel and reach the pedals.'
0:02:41 > 0:02:44- No!- Excuse me.- No!
0:02:44 > 0:02:46- Get out...!- Sorry, sorry.
0:02:46 > 0:02:49Oh, go on, then - you have it.
0:02:49 > 0:02:51Have you seen the seat?
0:02:51 > 0:02:55- Yes, I've noticed.- This one will take you backwards and forwards.
0:02:55 > 0:02:57If you want to come up...
0:02:57 > 0:03:01- Wow!- OK?- Three main manoeuvres before you start driving.
0:03:01 > 0:03:04Mirror, lipstick, go!
0:03:04 > 0:03:06Right.
0:03:06 > 0:03:10When I actually sat in the car, it was like a different person.
0:03:10 > 0:03:16I... A whole, you know, different world of opportunities opened up.
0:03:16 > 0:03:17BEEP
0:03:17 > 0:03:20- Phone.- 'Phone.'
0:03:20 > 0:03:23- Oh, my God! - There's your Bluetooth.- Wow!
0:03:23 > 0:03:27Can you imagine turning up at college in this soon?
0:03:27 > 0:03:31Everyone's going to go, "Look at her in that gorgeous car!"
0:03:32 > 0:03:35'I cannot wait to start doing some lessons.
0:03:35 > 0:03:38'I just really want to get started. Really do.'
0:03:38 > 0:03:43- Jazz? Mummy's got some adaptations of her own.- Oh, God.
0:03:43 > 0:03:46SHE GIGGLES
0:03:46 > 0:03:47Right, now,
0:03:47 > 0:03:50as it's a black car, right,
0:03:50 > 0:03:53- you want people to know it's a girl's car, don't you?- Yeah.
0:03:53 > 0:03:56- So we need these.- Wow!
0:03:56 > 0:03:59- Oh, we so need them.- Yes! - The pink fluffy dice.
0:03:59 > 0:04:01They are very nice.
0:04:01 > 0:04:05Secondly, this is a safety feature, and these are gorgeous.
0:04:05 > 0:04:07Oh, my goodness, what are they?
0:04:07 > 0:04:10These... You know how we have to have our straps lower...
0:04:10 > 0:04:14- Oh, they're gorgeous.- Do you like them, love?- I love them.
0:04:14 > 0:04:18- Might not like so much that one, Jazz.- Hang on.
0:04:18 > 0:04:21Them? No, I don't like them.
0:04:21 > 0:04:23Anyway, the worst is yet to come.
0:04:25 > 0:04:27- The nodding poodle.- Wow!
0:04:27 > 0:04:30THEY LAUGH
0:04:30 > 0:04:33Have you seen that? Absolutely awful!
0:04:36 > 0:04:39I am so proud of you. My little girl's got her own big car.
0:04:39 > 0:04:40Big car.
0:04:43 > 0:04:46Right now, I feel very, very, very excited,
0:04:46 > 0:04:49I can't wait to get started, but I'm also petrified
0:04:49 > 0:04:51and I would put it off for another year,
0:04:51 > 0:04:53but I know I've got to do it - I've got to do it.
0:04:53 > 0:04:59I've never been in the driving seat before, but I have to face my fears.
0:05:02 > 0:05:04It's time to get behind the wheel
0:05:04 > 0:05:07for my first driving lesson with my instructor, Barry.
0:05:07 > 0:05:09Now, then.
0:05:09 > 0:05:12Check all around. Keep the foot brake on.
0:05:12 > 0:05:15Mirror, mirror, straight ahead.
0:05:15 > 0:05:16Your mirror.
0:05:16 > 0:05:18So, release the foot brake,
0:05:18 > 0:05:20- the car's going to start moving.- Ah!
0:05:20 > 0:05:23And then you need to use the gas. That's it.
0:05:23 > 0:05:26Oh, my God. Oh, God. Oh, God.
0:05:26 > 0:05:28- Just take it out a little bit. - Sorry.
0:05:28 > 0:05:31- It's OK. no, it's good. - Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
0:05:31 > 0:05:34Now we're going to stop by that lamppost.
0:05:34 > 0:05:37Steering just a little bit, gentle onto the brake,
0:05:37 > 0:05:40steer slightly that way and then keep applying the brake.
0:05:40 > 0:05:43That's it, now keep your foot on the brake.
0:05:43 > 0:05:47- Oh, my God. - And a deep sigh of relief!
0:05:47 > 0:05:49- That was...- How did that feel?
0:05:49 > 0:05:52- I feel like crying. That was incredible.- It's good, innit?
0:05:52 > 0:05:54That was amazing, yeah.
0:06:01 > 0:06:04Learning to drive is harder than I imagined.
0:06:04 > 0:06:06There is so much to think about.
0:06:06 > 0:06:07Just to make sure...
0:06:07 > 0:06:09nothing's coming,
0:06:09 > 0:06:12and then follow him out with a nice bit of steering.
0:06:12 > 0:06:15- Oh, God.- You're OK, it's fine.
0:06:15 > 0:06:18And straighten up first before you use the gas.
0:06:18 > 0:06:19Now use the gas. That's it.
0:06:20 > 0:06:24As the lesson went on, my confidence grew.
0:06:24 > 0:06:26Gas. Oh, yes!
0:06:26 > 0:06:28- A little bit better.- Much better.
0:06:28 > 0:06:30Yep.
0:06:30 > 0:06:33- That was good.- That was good? That was good!- That was good.
0:06:33 > 0:06:35- Yay!- Yes!
0:06:35 > 0:06:37OK. High five.
0:06:37 > 0:06:41- Oh, yes!- Yes! Brilliant.- Oh, my God! - Good, excellent.
0:06:41 > 0:06:43I need as much practice as I can get,
0:06:43 > 0:06:46so Grandad's giving me driving lessons too.
0:06:46 > 0:06:51I have been surprised how quickly she's caught on with everything.
0:06:51 > 0:06:54She does have a specialist instructor.
0:06:54 > 0:06:57Of course, when you've been driving for years
0:06:57 > 0:06:58and teaching people for years,
0:06:58 > 0:07:00as I was way back in 1956 -
0:07:00 > 0:07:03I taught a lot of people to drive - you have your own methods
0:07:03 > 0:07:05and ways of doing things.
0:07:05 > 0:07:06Safety first at all times.
0:07:09 > 0:07:11What are we waiting here for?
0:07:13 > 0:07:15Er, somebody going past us.
0:07:15 > 0:07:18- Once they've gone past us... - They did.
0:07:18 > 0:07:21- Did they?- I saw... - OK, well, away we go, then.
0:07:25 > 0:07:28Perfect. Perfect takeoff. Beautiful.
0:07:28 > 0:07:33When I first got in the car, I ended up with a very aching leg
0:07:33 > 0:07:36because it's got a dual brake system.
0:07:36 > 0:07:40- Why did you have your foot on the brake?- Go on...
0:07:40 > 0:07:44Only...only because the car was coming.
0:07:44 > 0:07:46- Don't do that.- Turn left.
0:07:46 > 0:07:48- Because I...- Turn left. OK, yes, I understand.
0:07:48 > 0:07:50I let go of the foot brake, and you had it on.
0:07:50 > 0:07:52- That's right.- That's not me driving.
0:07:52 > 0:07:55- Tight to the kerb.- Don't do it.
0:07:55 > 0:07:57OK. That's fair enough.
0:07:57 > 0:08:00It's not OK, because Barry doesn't do it.
0:08:00 > 0:08:03- He only puts his foot down...- Yeah. - ..when I'm panicking.
0:08:03 > 0:08:05That's correct, yeah.
0:08:05 > 0:08:08I was quite happy then, you didn't need to do it.
0:08:08 > 0:08:10One of the first things she bought,
0:08:10 > 0:08:14long before she was going to learn to drive, was a sat nav.
0:08:14 > 0:08:17- Pull into here and stop. - No, I'll go and stop there.- Eh?
0:08:17 > 0:08:21I'll go round and stop in front of that silver car.
0:08:21 > 0:08:25No way on this earth will I have any sat nav in my car.
0:08:25 > 0:08:27OK. They are...
0:08:27 > 0:08:29You...
0:08:29 > 0:08:33Right, um, hang on a minute before you go anywhere.
0:08:33 > 0:08:36She said, "Why don't you have my sat nav? It tells you where to go."
0:08:36 > 0:08:39- Down there?- And it's another hundred yards down.
0:08:39 > 0:08:42I said, "No, no, no, I've got my own built-in sat nav."
0:08:42 > 0:08:46And she said, "What?" I said, "Yeah, there's my sat nav, right there."
0:08:46 > 0:08:49- Don't want to turn up someone's drive!- Ha-ha!
0:08:49 > 0:08:52I've done that myself before today, you know.
0:08:52 > 0:08:54Turned up somebody's drive. Especially...
0:08:54 > 0:08:57I followed somebody for a lot of miles in the fog,
0:08:57 > 0:09:01and I followed his fog lights, and I followed him up his own drive.
0:09:01 > 0:09:05Turn next right and stand beautifully square in the middle of the road.
0:09:05 > 0:09:09Maybe you do need a sat nav after all, Grandad.
0:09:09 > 0:09:11And...
0:09:11 > 0:09:14No problem, that's absolutely perfect.
0:09:14 > 0:09:16Very good, very good.
0:09:16 > 0:09:18'I really feel I'm going places now.
0:09:18 > 0:09:24'My dad's determined to move forward too, by improving his appearance.
0:09:24 > 0:09:28'Years of taking drugs has had a terrible effect on his teeth.
0:09:28 > 0:09:30When I was on crack,
0:09:30 > 0:09:34I used to push and wobble them, and I just used to flick them out.
0:09:34 > 0:09:37And I've got two teeth left in my mouth.
0:09:37 > 0:09:39Get off people's gardens.
0:09:39 > 0:09:43But Dad will soon have something to smile about.
0:09:43 > 0:09:45What's happening with your teeth, Dad?
0:09:45 > 0:09:47- Well, I went a week ago...- Yeah.
0:09:47 > 0:09:50- ..to have impressions made of my gums.- Yeah.
0:09:50 > 0:09:52I've got to go back on Thursday.
0:09:52 > 0:09:57- Right.- And I think they'll give me some temporary teeth.
0:09:57 > 0:10:01God, I can't imagine you with, like, a full set of bright, white teeth.
0:10:01 > 0:10:04Oh, I know. I hope they're not too bright.
0:10:04 > 0:10:07Like, sun glaring off them! Ping!
0:10:07 > 0:10:11They asked me what colour I wanted.
0:10:11 > 0:10:14- What colour you wanted? - Yeah.- "Hm, yellow, please"!
0:10:14 > 0:10:16I'll have some nicotine-stained teeth!
0:10:16 > 0:10:18Black, if you want.
0:10:18 > 0:10:22So do you just want to do it for yourself, or for us, or...?
0:10:22 > 0:10:23- For everybody.- Right.
0:10:23 > 0:10:26- It's nice to feel good about yourself, though.- Yeah.
0:10:26 > 0:10:30- Because of what I was doing before, when I was in Manchester...- Yeah.
0:10:30 > 0:10:33- ..I didn't take care of my appearance...- Yeah.
0:10:33 > 0:10:38- ..cos I didn't...I didn't have anybody, really, to impress.- Yeah.
0:10:38 > 0:10:42I do appreciate that you're making yourself look nice for us.
0:10:42 > 0:10:46Well, you've got to...you've got to make an effort, haven't you?
0:10:46 > 0:10:51- Yeah. I know Mum's been badgering you a lot as well.- Oh, yeah.
0:10:51 > 0:10:54'I won't be around when Dad gets his new teeth
0:10:54 > 0:10:57'as I'm going to be away for the next month.
0:10:57 > 0:11:00'As part of my college course, I'm doing a work placement
0:11:00 > 0:11:03'at an animal hospital in America.'
0:11:03 > 0:11:05Oh, God, where do I start?
0:11:05 > 0:11:07'My placement is close to my Aunty Shelly's home,
0:11:07 > 0:11:10'so I can stay with her. Mum's not coming with me.'
0:11:10 > 0:11:12Jumpers. It'll be freezing.
0:11:14 > 0:11:18A year ago, I wouldn't have even considered doing this without my mum,
0:11:18 > 0:11:22and I think that's a big, big change in our relationship.
0:11:22 > 0:11:24Um, I don't...
0:11:24 > 0:11:29need her as much as I did.
0:11:29 > 0:11:33Also, it'll be good for me to keep on getting that independence,
0:11:33 > 0:11:36and it's just the next step in our relationship.
0:11:36 > 0:11:40It's like me going away, other side of the world, without her,
0:11:40 > 0:11:43that is huge - huge for us.
0:11:43 > 0:11:45But it'll be good for me.
0:11:46 > 0:11:49Do you want to come with me?
0:11:49 > 0:11:50Do you want to come with me?
0:11:50 > 0:11:52Oh, baby!
0:11:54 > 0:11:55You do, don't you?
0:11:55 > 0:11:58- How are you getting on with your packing?- All right.
0:11:58 > 0:12:00- Do you need that?- Yeah.
0:12:00 > 0:12:03Right. I have bought you this.
0:12:03 > 0:12:05Oh, that's horrible. That's horrible.
0:12:05 > 0:12:09- Right, but...- I'm not taking it. - Have a look what else is in.
0:12:09 > 0:12:12- Oh, dollars.- Yes.
0:12:12 > 0:12:17- Why didn't you get dollars yet? - I haven't had time. I was going to get them at the airport.
0:12:17 > 0:12:21- So there's £50.- Yep.- But obviously, it's not a treat. You owe it me.- OK.
0:12:21 > 0:12:24- So, you owe me £50. - I'll get it when I can.
0:12:24 > 0:12:29Right, so put that in...in here.
0:12:29 > 0:12:31- I've got you a card.- Right.
0:12:31 > 0:12:34- OK? So, do you want to open it?- Yeah.
0:12:36 > 0:12:38'Although I live at college,
0:12:38 > 0:12:41'I've never spent this long away from my mum.
0:12:41 > 0:12:43'I'm going to be worried about her,
0:12:43 > 0:12:45'as she has a very serious lung condition.'
0:12:47 > 0:12:49Oh.
0:12:49 > 0:12:51I love you so much.
0:12:53 > 0:12:54Really.
0:12:56 > 0:12:59I love you so much. You'll never know.
0:13:12 > 0:13:14You've got me going now.
0:13:14 > 0:13:19- Whenever, you know, you're upset, will you ring me, please?- Yeah.
0:13:19 > 0:13:22- And don't kill any pets... - I'll try not to.
0:13:22 > 0:13:25..at the vet's, cos then you won't get a job.
0:13:25 > 0:13:28I'll try.
0:13:28 > 0:13:31Oh, don't cry. Don't.
0:13:39 > 0:13:41Love you.
0:13:41 > 0:13:42Two.
0:13:45 > 0:13:48- Right, let's get on with packing.- Yes.
0:13:55 > 0:14:00This is the first time I've been to any airport without having my mum at my side.
0:14:03 > 0:14:06- Hello! Can I check in, please? - Thank you.
0:14:06 > 0:14:08- Do you have your address details with you?- Yeah.
0:14:08 > 0:14:11- It's that one there. - That's great, thank you.
0:14:11 > 0:14:14- It's going to be gate number 203 at 9.50.- OK, brilliant.
0:14:14 > 0:14:16Thank you.
0:14:16 > 0:14:20It's kind of nice not having to worry about what Mum's doing
0:14:20 > 0:14:23or help her with anything.
0:14:23 > 0:14:25It's just me being independent, and I kind of like it.
0:14:45 > 0:14:49Just after I arrive in America, Mum receives some bad news.
0:14:51 > 0:14:54Well, we got a letter from the landlord
0:14:54 > 0:14:58because he wants the flat back,
0:14:58 > 0:15:01and...in the next month, if possible.
0:15:03 > 0:15:05Bev has got to move yet again.
0:15:05 > 0:15:09- This is the third year running, is it?- Yes.
0:15:09 > 0:15:14Every 12 months, she's had to move.
0:15:14 > 0:15:18I'd moved so many times, I've lost count.
0:15:18 > 0:15:23Because we rent places, we can't guarantee that the landlord won't say
0:15:23 > 0:15:25"I'm selling up" or "Can you move out? I want to live here myself",
0:15:25 > 0:15:30you know. We keep getting really settled, and the landlord says "Right, out."
0:15:30 > 0:15:36Her health is the main problem when Bev has to move.
0:15:36 > 0:15:37She can't cope with dust,
0:15:37 > 0:15:41and of course any movement includes that kind of thing.
0:15:41 > 0:15:44There's the general physical aspect of,
0:15:44 > 0:15:48obviously I couldn't put that microwave into a box,
0:15:48 > 0:15:53couldn't pack up a television, take things off walls that people put up for me.
0:15:53 > 0:15:55There's so many things to think about.
0:15:57 > 0:16:00Mum will have to look for a new home in Wales.
0:16:04 > 0:16:07But for the next month, my home will be in Mountainside,
0:16:07 > 0:16:09a town close to New York.
0:16:09 > 0:16:12I'm staying here with my Aunty Shelley and her family.
0:16:12 > 0:16:16These are my cousins - Naomi, who is seven, and Sarah, who is five.
0:16:16 > 0:16:19And that's 17-year-old Johnny in the white T-shirt
0:16:19 > 0:16:23and 15-year-old Lonnie is the one in the hat.
0:16:23 > 0:16:26I love spending time with Sarah and Naomi.
0:16:26 > 0:16:28They just completely accept me for who I am.
0:16:28 > 0:16:33You know, I'd like to say they look up to me, but they're nearly bigger than me now.
0:16:33 > 0:16:39- Johnny and Lonnie are so much fun. - Come on.- No. I can't, no. - Sing, sing.
0:16:40 > 0:16:41I can't sing.
0:16:43 > 0:16:45When I'm with them, my naughty side really comes out.
0:16:45 > 0:16:49- You sing! - I can't sing.- Well, neither can I.
0:16:50 > 0:16:54'They get my humour, and we're always laughing all the time.'
0:16:54 > 0:16:58- Turn it into a rap.- I'm always being told to calm down.
0:16:58 > 0:17:05Give me a week, and I'll write a rap about a cat in a vet's.
0:17:08 > 0:17:12Back in Wales, Mum's house hunting with Nana's help.
0:17:13 > 0:17:14Oh, heck.
0:17:14 > 0:17:17- Oh, heck. What? - See where the door key is.
0:17:17 > 0:17:21- You wouldn't be able to get in. - Wouldn't be able to get in.
0:17:21 > 0:17:23- Is that too high? - At the moment, yeah.
0:17:23 > 0:17:26OK, ladies, if you'd like to go through.
0:17:26 > 0:17:31- If you turn to your right, Bev, you'll see the lounge.- Oh, wow.
0:17:31 > 0:17:33'There's so many things to think about.'
0:17:33 > 0:17:35It's got to be two bedrooms.
0:17:35 > 0:17:38It's got to be ground floor now because of my health.
0:17:38 > 0:17:42- Try the light switch, Bev. - Yeah, I can reach that.
0:17:42 > 0:17:46And it's got to be easily manageable.
0:17:46 > 0:17:49Look, Bev, you won't be able to reach the switch here,
0:17:49 > 0:17:53you'd have to have some kind of adjustment there.
0:17:53 > 0:17:56That's your central heating controls.
0:17:56 > 0:17:58Yeah, I'll just get a little stool for me and Jazz.
0:17:58 > 0:18:00No-one's going to adapt it for me,
0:18:00 > 0:18:01people in rented property don't do that.
0:18:01 > 0:18:07- Is this a shared garden?- No, this is just for your use.- Oh, brilliant.
0:18:07 > 0:18:09I like pegging out my washing. I do.
0:18:09 > 0:18:13I love this weather, pegging out. Feel a bit exposed.
0:18:13 > 0:18:15Not only that - there's people above you,
0:18:15 > 0:18:18and you didn't like it last time. There are times when you, you know,
0:18:18 > 0:18:21you have your to-dos, you and Jazz, and somewhere like this...
0:18:21 > 0:18:23- What, you mean shouting and arguing?- Well, yes.
0:18:23 > 0:18:25What, and you don't ever shout at my dad?
0:18:25 > 0:18:27Well, of course, but I'm in a detached bungalow.
0:18:29 > 0:18:32Luckily, next on the list is a detached bungalow,
0:18:32 > 0:18:35just like Nana and Granddad's.
0:18:35 > 0:18:39- Oh, this looks nice, Bev.- Let me do a wheelie.- Where are you going?
0:18:39 > 0:18:41I'm doing a wheelie. This is me.
0:18:42 > 0:18:44Let's go in, let's go in,
0:18:44 > 0:18:48- let's go in.- Hey, this is nice.- Is it?
0:18:48 > 0:18:54- Oh, yes. Come on, Bev. Wow. - Wow. Oh, this...- This is nice.
0:18:54 > 0:19:00Hey, it's got blinds like mine. Oh, low light switches! Wow.
0:19:00 > 0:19:04- Hey, this one's low as well. - Oh, my God. Someone's built this for me.
0:19:04 > 0:19:10Oh, oh, Mum. It's like a hotel. I can reach them. Mum, I can reach that.
0:19:10 > 0:19:11TOILET FLUSHES
0:19:11 > 0:19:12Oh!
0:19:12 > 0:19:13Oh, Mum.
0:19:13 > 0:19:15Yeah, it's nice, this one.
0:19:15 > 0:19:18Don't want to look anywhere else, because I've already made my mind up.
0:19:18 > 0:19:20- What, that you're having this one? - Yeah.
0:19:23 > 0:19:25Look at the deck. Wow.
0:19:25 > 0:19:29Look at that for a view! It's better than mine. How dare you?
0:19:29 > 0:19:32- Kestrels. I can see Snowdon. - Yep, better than mine.
0:19:32 > 0:19:37Hang on a minute, hang on a minute. I'm just going to practise something.
0:19:38 > 0:19:42- What?- Just a minute. I've got my swinging hammock, and I'm here.
0:19:42 > 0:19:45My dogs are here, and my wine's here.
0:19:47 > 0:19:52- Oh, yes. This is the place for me. - Yes. This is fabulous.
0:19:53 > 0:20:00Right, come on, cheer up. This is what you've always wanted. A bungalow. With a view.
0:20:00 > 0:20:02Tell you what. I'll be able to sunbathe there.
0:20:02 > 0:20:06No, I don't think so. Don't start going topless, Bev.
0:20:06 > 0:20:10- No, here, this bit. - No, no.- No-one would see.
0:20:10 > 0:20:12You don't know who's seeing you from the caravans.
0:20:12 > 0:20:15There might be somebody with a pair of goggles like that.
0:20:15 > 0:20:18- Well, there's not much to see, really.- Oh, thank you.
0:20:18 > 0:20:23Mum has found her dream home.
0:20:23 > 0:20:27- And in America, I'm about - to- start my dream job.
0:20:32 > 0:20:34- I'll see you later, then. - Have a super day!
0:20:34 > 0:20:36I'll see you at one o'clock. I'll come and pick you up.
0:20:40 > 0:20:43This is a place where most of my employees, and now you,
0:20:43 > 0:20:45are going to leave your coat here.
0:20:45 > 0:20:50- This is what I wear at college.- OK. - Thank you very much.- OK.
0:20:50 > 0:20:53'In the past when I've done work experience,
0:20:53 > 0:20:56'it's only involved grooming animals and cleaning their cages.'
0:20:56 > 0:21:00So we need to establish exactly what you can do.
0:21:00 > 0:21:03We check dogs for different diseases.
0:21:03 > 0:21:06We do at least 20 a day so that's kind of,
0:21:06 > 0:21:08you're going to be helping our technicians to do that.
0:21:08 > 0:21:09'Wow. I'm a little shocked.
0:21:09 > 0:21:14'It looks as if I'll be able to get some real hands-on experience.'
0:21:14 > 0:21:17You can also, I can see you doing some lab work for us.
0:21:17 > 0:21:22You can also help us clean cages or take care of animals.
0:21:23 > 0:21:27I just can't wait to get started.
0:21:27 > 0:21:33By the afternoon, I'm doing diagnostic lab work on a dog's blood.
0:21:33 > 0:21:35- Make sure you rotate the samples. - Yep.
0:21:35 > 0:21:38All right. Here we go. Press Run.
0:21:38 > 0:21:41So cool.
0:21:41 > 0:21:43When I first walked in them doors,
0:21:43 > 0:21:48I thought I was going to be just put in a corner and told, you know, "just watch but don't touch."
0:21:48 > 0:21:53- Percentage of red blood cell count in the blood.- Yeah, so it's normal.
0:21:53 > 0:21:54Correct, this is normal.
0:21:54 > 0:21:56'And here, it's completely different.'
0:21:56 > 0:21:58And that's such a refreshing thing.
0:21:58 > 0:22:02Do you think that's something you could do, like run bloods?
0:22:03 > 0:22:05I think after a few practices...
0:22:07 > 0:22:09I think she is really eager to learn.
0:22:10 > 0:22:14I got an impression that she knows a lot already about animals.
0:22:14 > 0:22:16She asks me really good questions
0:22:16 > 0:22:20and hopefully, it will be a really big help for her future career.
0:22:23 > 0:22:26In Wales, Mum is moving home today.
0:22:26 > 0:22:29We may be little, but we have lots of stuff to pack up.
0:22:29 > 0:22:34Oh, my goodness, can't believe how much dirt and dust is on the sofas.
0:22:34 > 0:22:38Right, Paul, that all needs going in this corner.
0:22:43 > 0:22:44There you go, Hemmel,
0:22:44 > 0:22:48you're going to a new home today, and it won't be this bathroom.
0:22:52 > 0:22:56- This is what's left. Stop, stop... Oh.- Why are these out?
0:22:58 > 0:23:02Put them under me. Just turn round, let me just put them under me, underneath.
0:23:02 > 0:23:06When I have my boob job, right, this is...no, properly.
0:23:09 > 0:23:11Right, this is what I'll look like.
0:23:12 > 0:23:16How much sexier am I? Shall I go to the new bungalow like this?
0:23:16 > 0:23:20I'll turn up there and people'll go, "Oh, look at her, she's gorgeous."
0:23:20 > 0:23:23No, loads of women have it done now.
0:23:23 > 0:23:25THEY LAUGH
0:23:26 > 0:23:30- Jasmine?- Yeah?- I have really good case study for you.
0:23:30 > 0:23:35I've been at the animal hospital in America for two weeks now
0:23:35 > 0:23:38- and I'm really loving it. - This came in the other day...
0:23:38 > 0:23:40- That looks like... - The white stuff is...
0:23:40 > 0:23:43- Looks like a cluster of bladder stones.- Yep, that's what they are.
0:23:43 > 0:23:47Jasmine, as soon as she walks in through a door, she...
0:23:49 > 0:23:52..became a hit in our place.
0:23:52 > 0:23:53And it's not because of her height,
0:23:53 > 0:23:56it's because of her outgoing personality.
0:23:56 > 0:24:00- And now look at the light. It's above the scale.- Oh.
0:24:00 > 0:24:02It means that this cat is really dehydrated.
0:24:02 > 0:24:04Oh, dear.
0:24:04 > 0:24:07I've learnt so much. I've been so hands on.
0:24:07 > 0:24:09I've been doing exactly what I want to do.
0:24:09 > 0:24:12This cat is dehydrated so he needs to have some fluids
0:24:12 > 0:24:14and you're going to be doing it.
0:24:14 > 0:24:18You hold this needle, and be careful it goes under his skin.
0:24:19 > 0:24:20Excellent.
0:24:20 > 0:24:23The lab work is one of my favourite bits of it, I love it so much.
0:24:23 > 0:24:27People were like, you're going to be so bored of it, but it's not,
0:24:27 > 0:24:30because I can't wait for the results and I sit there waiting, like.
0:24:30 > 0:24:36I'm such a sad teenager, really, when that sort of thing excites me.
0:24:41 > 0:24:45People automatically assume that I need a stool to reach anything.
0:24:45 > 0:24:49You know, and Michael's like, "No, we treat her like a big girl."
0:24:49 > 0:24:52You know, she can do it but if she can't, she will ask for help.
0:24:52 > 0:24:54And that's what I like.
0:24:54 > 0:24:59I understand that it's very hard for people to gauge how to help me
0:24:59 > 0:25:02and they don't want to offend me by not offering me any help,
0:25:02 > 0:25:05and they don't want to offend me by offering me too much help.
0:25:05 > 0:25:08It's a very hard balance, I understand that,
0:25:08 > 0:25:10but they seem to have got it just right here.
0:25:10 > 0:25:14That's why I run to work, I just can't wait to get here.
0:25:15 > 0:25:19In Colwyn Bay, Mum has settled into her new home.
0:25:19 > 0:25:22But that's not the only change.
0:25:22 > 0:25:25Dad has finally got his false teeth.
0:25:29 > 0:25:33I'm not sure if dad is brushing up his appearance to try and get mum back.
0:25:33 > 0:25:36They've been getting very close.
0:25:36 > 0:25:38There's been lots of flirting...
0:25:41 > 0:25:45..and kissing, even before he got his new teeth!
0:25:47 > 0:25:50- Paul, where are you? - In the bathroom doing my teeth.
0:25:50 > 0:25:53But they both keep telling me they're just good friends.
0:25:53 > 0:25:55Right, so what do you have to do?
0:25:55 > 0:25:59- You have to put this in them... - Yeah.- Then put them in my mouth
0:25:59 > 0:26:04- and hold them, in my mouth.- For how long?- About two minutes until it sets.
0:26:04 > 0:26:06- Two minutes like that.- Yeah,
0:26:06 > 0:26:10- but the other day, I did it and I put too much on...- Yeah.
0:26:10 > 0:26:13..and I ripped all the skin off the top of my mouth.
0:26:13 > 0:26:18Why don't you just do that, put a cocktail in like mine,
0:26:18 > 0:26:20like that and then...
0:26:20 > 0:26:22SHE GIGGLES
0:26:22 > 0:26:24- ..swill it round a bit, cheers. - Cheers.
0:26:24 > 0:26:27SHE GIGGLES
0:26:27 > 0:26:29Now that's how you have false teeth.
0:26:29 > 0:26:32If you're going to do it, right, let's have a go at this.
0:26:32 > 0:26:39SHE CONTINUES GIGGLING
0:26:39 > 0:26:41Look at that!
0:26:41 > 0:26:42That's how I keep mine.
0:26:46 > 0:26:49Here are your teeth, you've just cleaned them.
0:26:49 > 0:26:51Can I put them in and pretend they're mine?
0:26:51 > 0:26:54HE LAUGHS
0:26:54 > 0:26:57THEY BOTH LAUGH
0:26:57 > 0:26:59You look like an owl.
0:26:59 > 0:27:02THEY CONTINUE LAUGHING
0:27:02 > 0:27:05Hello, marry me.
0:27:10 > 0:27:12Am I sexy in these?
0:27:12 > 0:27:14You look like an horse.
0:27:17 > 0:27:20THEY GIGGLE
0:27:25 > 0:27:27Leave them in there.
0:27:30 > 0:27:33Whilst Dad is happy with his new smile,
0:27:33 > 0:27:36there is one part of his body that he hates.
0:27:37 > 0:27:41Years of taking drugs have scarred his legs permanently
0:27:41 > 0:27:44so Dad always wears long trousers in public.
0:27:44 > 0:27:48Drug taking wrecked me body, especially my legs.
0:27:48 > 0:27:52I can't walk more than 100 yards or so
0:27:52 > 0:27:57before my legs start burning and ache, my bones ache.
0:27:57 > 0:28:02All these here, all the marks on my legs are from injection points
0:28:02 > 0:28:09and where I've missed the vein and it's just gone into the muscle
0:28:09 > 0:28:12and just starts eating away at it.
0:28:12 > 0:28:16The vein's in my arms have gone. The only place I've got a vein left
0:28:16 > 0:28:20is in my neck here and that's for, if I have to go to hospital
0:28:20 > 0:28:23and they need to find a vein, that's the only place they'll find one.
0:28:23 > 0:28:27Dad's trying to put his past behind him.
0:28:27 > 0:28:34Wanting to take drugs is going to be in my mind for the rest of my life.
0:28:35 > 0:28:40But you've just got to be determined not to slide back into that routine.
0:28:42 > 0:28:47As part of moving on, Dad is smartening himself up,
0:28:47 > 0:28:52but the only problem is that mum's taken on the role of his personal stylist.
0:28:52 > 0:28:55In the next stage of your makeover, you're having your hair done,
0:28:55 > 0:28:58and I want to tell you what style you're having.
0:28:58 > 0:29:01- No.- Yes, I am. - No, I'm having my hair trimmed.
0:29:01 > 0:29:04Please don't, I'm having my hair trimmed and that's it.
0:29:04 > 0:29:05- Don't argue with me.- I'm not...
0:29:05 > 0:29:08While we're here, I'm going to have mine done.
0:29:08 > 0:29:11- Is that water OK? - That's lovely, yeah.
0:29:11 > 0:29:14- Is that water fine for you? - Fantastic, mate, yeah.
0:29:14 > 0:29:16Make his cold.
0:29:16 > 0:29:19- Ah...- Don't listen to her, she's a trouble causer.
0:29:19 > 0:29:23Is she? Does she wear the trousers in the household, then?
0:29:23 > 0:29:24Oh, God yeah.
0:29:24 > 0:29:30Wears the trousers? And what do you wear, Paul? Skirts?
0:29:31 > 0:29:34Mum and dad are like an old married couple.
0:29:34 > 0:29:37But when they first got together, they were very much in love.
0:29:41 > 0:29:45Things that made me fall in love with Paul were things like
0:29:45 > 0:29:47we laughed at the same things.
0:29:49 > 0:29:53We wanted to travel to the same places.
0:29:54 > 0:29:56We just got on.
0:29:58 > 0:30:01We were friends for so long
0:30:01 > 0:30:05and we just, sort of, one night clicked and that was it.
0:30:05 > 0:30:10And then we were never apart for...three to four years.
0:30:10 > 0:30:13Paul, do you remember when you met me?
0:30:13 > 0:30:15What was my hair like then?
0:30:15 > 0:30:17- Beautiful. - Oh, isn't now?
0:30:17 > 0:30:21No. Of course, it is.
0:30:21 > 0:30:23It was just dead long, wasn't it?
0:30:23 > 0:30:27I used to go to her flat and she wasn't in, I'd be gutted.
0:30:29 > 0:30:31- And...- Stop it, Carl.
0:30:31 > 0:30:36I'd sit, sit outside her door sometimes waiting for her to come in.
0:30:36 > 0:30:40- Yeah, we used to be really romantic, didn't we?- Yeah.- Not now.
0:30:44 > 0:30:50He didn't seem to have any issue about me being small.
0:30:50 > 0:30:53None at all. He didn't talk about it much,
0:30:53 > 0:30:55he didn't question it much from day one.
0:30:56 > 0:30:58I just saw her as a person,
0:30:58 > 0:31:00I didn't see her as small.
0:31:00 > 0:31:04I saw her, she was a woman. And she's beautiful looking.
0:31:04 > 0:31:08When we were first together, I was constantly,
0:31:08 > 0:31:10don't you dare say that, who you staring at?
0:31:10 > 0:31:15And then one day Bev said to me, "You'll be doing that forever,"
0:31:15 > 0:31:17so I had to learn to put up with it, really.
0:31:17 > 0:31:23It was hard, you know what I mean, because I wanted to protect her.
0:31:23 > 0:31:28I didn't want people saying nasty things. And staring down.
0:31:28 > 0:31:31Especially when we walked down the road holding hands.
0:31:31 > 0:31:34I've been called a paedophile for going out with her,
0:31:34 > 0:31:36because she was small.
0:31:36 > 0:31:39But I've explained to them she's older than me,
0:31:39 > 0:31:43so how does that make me one of them?
0:31:43 > 0:31:46Final phase of the makeover.
0:31:46 > 0:31:50Now that you've got your hair nice, we need to choose some clothes.
0:31:50 > 0:31:57Look at him, that's...can you imagine your head on that body?
0:31:57 > 0:31:59Your head there...
0:31:59 > 0:32:02come on bend down to mine. Now look, look at that.
0:32:02 > 0:32:04I wouldn't be able to keep my hands off you.
0:32:04 > 0:32:07You could have me after that, as your girlfriend,
0:32:07 > 0:32:09if you looked like that.
0:32:09 > 0:32:12I'll stay like I am, thanks. And be single.
0:32:12 > 0:32:14HE LAUGHS
0:32:14 > 0:32:15Your face...
0:32:15 > 0:32:18Oh, you're so funny. Go and get a basket.
0:32:19 > 0:32:21- Do you like it?- Yeah.
0:32:21 > 0:32:23Do you want to have a look in the mirror? Or just trust me?
0:32:23 > 0:32:26You can buy a coat without looking at it in the mirror,
0:32:26 > 0:32:27I can't believe that.
0:32:30 > 0:32:34Paul will always be the person who gave me Jasmine.
0:32:36 > 0:32:42And that is most precious gift that he could,
0:32:42 > 0:32:43that anyone could give me,
0:32:43 > 0:32:47and I'll never ever stop loving him because of it.
0:32:47 > 0:32:51- I'm not carrying them. - Go on, you can carry them.
0:32:51 > 0:32:53SHE LAUGHS
0:32:56 > 0:33:00My work placement is over and it's time to say goodbye.
0:33:02 > 0:33:06I've learned so much, my teacher, Michael, has been amazing.
0:33:06 > 0:33:10I've got you a picture of me...me being happy.
0:33:10 > 0:33:13Oh. Thank you so much.
0:33:17 > 0:33:21I arrive home from America to big changes.
0:33:21 > 0:33:23Wow.
0:33:23 > 0:33:25Mum has a new home.
0:33:25 > 0:33:29- This is going to be my double... - Yeah, I can tell you've taken the nice room.
0:33:29 > 0:33:34Jazz...I'm here, I live here.
0:33:34 > 0:33:37Paddy and Pebbles have had a hair cut.
0:33:37 > 0:33:39Pebbles! Paddy!
0:33:39 > 0:33:42But the biggest change is with Dad.
0:33:42 > 0:33:47- Hi, love. - Hi, Dad. Oh, you look brilliant.
0:33:47 > 0:33:48- Show her your teeth. - Wow.
0:33:48 > 0:33:52- No moustache. - You look amazing.
0:33:52 > 0:33:55- It feels really weird having these. - Yeah, I'm sure it does.
0:33:55 > 0:33:58- It makes feel really weird.- Really?
0:33:58 > 0:34:01Because I've had to start to learn to chew again.
0:34:01 > 0:34:03- It sounds weird but I have.- Wow.
0:34:03 > 0:34:07- You do look brilliant.- I can't believe it.- You'll get used to it.
0:34:07 > 0:34:09Oh, yeah, I will get used to them.
0:34:09 > 0:34:11Actually, you're tired, aren't you, darling?
0:34:17 > 0:34:19I've barely had chance to recover from jet lag...
0:34:21 > 0:34:25..when it's time to start my driving lessons again.
0:34:28 > 0:34:30Whenever you're ready, I'll leave it to you.
0:34:46 > 0:34:47Stop!
0:34:48 > 0:34:50Stop!
0:34:50 > 0:34:52Stop!
0:34:54 > 0:34:57The more lessons I have, the more skills I learn.
0:34:57 > 0:34:58I love driving.
0:34:58 > 0:35:02And now it's time to put those new skills to the test...literally!
0:35:04 > 0:35:07Oh, yes, oh, yes, oh, yes!
0:35:09 > 0:35:12I can't believe it's the morning of my driving test.
0:35:12 > 0:35:14- Morning, Jazz, how are you?- Hello.
0:35:14 > 0:35:17- Are you all ready for it?- Morning.
0:35:17 > 0:35:22- Do I look ready for it?- Yeah. - Well, at least it's a nice day. How are you?
0:35:22 > 0:35:23I'm fine, how are you, Bev?
0:35:23 > 0:35:27- All right, good luck for you both today.- Oh, we don't need luck, do we, Jazz?
0:35:27 > 0:35:31- I know, but you know what I mean.- You've got the skills, haven't you, and the knowledge.
0:35:31 > 0:35:34Yes, yes, and we can always blame Barry if anything goes wrong.
0:35:34 > 0:35:38- We just say, do you know what, I knew he wasn't a good...- You always blame the examiner
0:35:38 > 0:35:43- if it goes wrong.- Oh, no, no, no. - Good luck.- He's the person who says yes or no.
0:35:43 > 0:35:45Hurry up because I want to start going shopping and things.
0:35:45 > 0:35:47I need a taxi.
0:35:48 > 0:35:51- Good luck, darling.- Yeah.
0:35:51 > 0:35:53Oh, this is it.
0:35:53 > 0:35:55Good luck, be safe.
0:35:55 > 0:36:00She will be absolutely on the floor if she doesn't pass today.
0:36:00 > 0:36:03I'm nervously driving to the test centre when, suddenly,
0:36:03 > 0:36:05there's a huge problem.
0:36:05 > 0:36:10What's happened is we've got the malfunction warning light come up on the dash.
0:36:10 > 0:36:12We've got to take it to a dealer.
0:36:12 > 0:36:15Hopefully, we can get it done in the next 5 or 10 minutes ready for test,
0:36:15 > 0:36:19but if not, unfortunately, the test won't go ahead, isn't it?
0:36:19 > 0:36:22- Which is a shame because Jazz is all ready to go.- I felt really good,
0:36:22 > 0:36:26I felt really confident, I had a nice drive here.
0:36:26 > 0:36:30And then this warning light comes up and it's just, it's so unfair
0:36:30 > 0:36:33because it's like I was ready, I felt so confident,
0:36:33 > 0:36:36and then there's just nothing you can do.
0:36:38 > 0:36:42Just been in. They've said that it'll actually take them at least an hour to be able to check it,
0:36:42 > 0:36:46so I think the best thing we should do is go for the test.
0:36:46 > 0:36:51If it comes on during test and they decide they want to terminate, well, OK, that's the way it is.
0:36:54 > 0:36:56The warning light is off again,
0:36:56 > 0:36:58but I'm really scared it could come on at any time.
0:36:58 > 0:37:01I've got to do my test now anyway,
0:37:01 > 0:37:04so I just hope it doesn't distract me.
0:37:09 > 0:37:11Love her to pass first time.
0:37:11 > 0:37:14It's going to be able to get her out and about so much.
0:37:15 > 0:37:19She'll be busy now driving and reversing, and things like that,
0:37:19 > 0:37:23and I'm just going, "Oh, my god, she's taking her driving test, oh."
0:37:23 > 0:37:25And I'm the one falling apart.
0:37:27 > 0:37:32I want my little baby to be happy and do everything well and that's it.
0:37:32 > 0:37:36'Hooray, put your feet up and hands up.'
0:37:37 > 0:37:39Not because she's mine,
0:37:39 > 0:37:42but because I don't want her to get hurt in any way.
0:37:42 > 0:37:47I don't want her to feel sad, even though you've got to in life.
0:37:47 > 0:37:50'Hey, look at that, nana, isn't she clever?'
0:37:50 > 0:37:54You can't feel happy and know the joys of happiness and success
0:37:54 > 0:37:58unless you've failed a few times.
0:38:00 > 0:38:02It was really hard.
0:38:05 > 0:38:06It was so hard.
0:38:06 > 0:38:10I didn't think it'd be that much pressure but...
0:38:10 > 0:38:16I was OK when I got in the car, then it was like oh, my God, it's real,
0:38:16 > 0:38:18and that engine thing really put me off,
0:38:18 > 0:38:21so I was just waiting for it come back on and...
0:38:21 > 0:38:25I really lost...lost concentration because of that.
0:38:25 > 0:38:27I failed my test.
0:38:30 > 0:38:35I just feel sometimes like I have to make up for the fact that I'm small
0:38:35 > 0:38:37by doing things perfect.
0:38:40 > 0:38:43Even though I can do it again,
0:38:43 > 0:38:45I just feel like I've really failed and everything.
0:38:50 > 0:38:51It's really hard.
0:38:53 > 0:38:57It's just one other step in life, pass or fail,
0:38:57 > 0:38:59OK, another step in life.
0:38:59 > 0:39:03And, next time, she'll pass.
0:39:12 > 0:39:14I'm trying to sort out my new bedroom
0:39:14 > 0:39:17and I've found an old box of keepsakes.
0:39:20 > 0:39:24Dad missed the first 16 years of my life so I wanted to share my childhood memories with him.
0:39:24 > 0:39:26The good ones.
0:39:26 > 0:39:29My first primary school. I loved that school.
0:39:29 > 0:39:32Probably still fits, actually.
0:39:32 > 0:39:33And the bad ones.
0:39:33 > 0:39:38- Your mum said that you hated that... - School photo, hate it.
0:39:38 > 0:39:42- Ugh...my fringe!- But your mum said you hated it.- I do.
0:39:42 > 0:39:45Mum used to put like a pan over our head and do it like that.
0:39:45 > 0:39:48You couldn't tell who was a boy or a girl
0:39:48 > 0:39:49because it was all the same haircut.
0:39:49 > 0:39:55These, although they look incredibly tatty and horrible,
0:39:55 > 0:39:58these were what I was wrapped in from when I was born.
0:39:58 > 0:40:00- Look at that.- Yeah.
0:40:00 > 0:40:03Massive rip in it, up to when I was about three and four,
0:40:03 > 0:40:08- I used to have these everywhere with me.- Yeah, comfort blankets, aren't they?- Good memories.
0:40:08 > 0:40:11- I wish I could have been there. - Yeah.
0:40:11 > 0:40:15I never used to sort of think, "Oh, what would it be like with my dad around?"
0:40:15 > 0:40:18- because I'd never had you around that I could remember.- Yeah.
0:40:18 > 0:40:23You know what I mean, it's not like you left when I was five or six where I'd be able to remember.
0:40:23 > 0:40:26- Well, I'm staying now. - Pram toys,
0:40:26 > 0:40:30used to go across the pram. Do you ever feel that you've missed out?
0:40:30 > 0:40:32- Yeah, I always feel I missed out, yeah.- Why?
0:40:32 > 0:40:36Cos, you know, all these memories you've got here,
0:40:36 > 0:40:38- I should have known them, shouldn't I?- Yeah, guess so.
0:40:38 > 0:40:41I shouldn't be shown them now. I should have been there.
0:40:41 > 0:40:48- You know, when I chose drugs, I didn't purposely choose them not to be with you.- Yeah.
0:40:48 > 0:40:53They had a big grip on me and on my life at the time.
0:40:53 > 0:40:57I would have thought, you know, having mum and then having me...
0:40:57 > 0:41:00Yeah, should have changed me. Should of, yeah.
0:41:00 > 0:41:01It should have done.
0:41:01 > 0:41:08- I think things worked out good I'm...a pretty good person.- You've travelled all around the world.
0:41:08 > 0:41:12- Mum's given me the most amazing life. - Yeah, I know, yeah.
0:41:12 > 0:41:14I used to love this jumper.
0:41:15 > 0:41:19You know, the thing is I don't want to dwell on the past now.
0:41:20 > 0:41:24I want to look forward to the future and plan the future
0:41:24 > 0:41:29and have a happy future and there's nothing we can do to change the past, there's no point.
0:41:29 > 0:41:30No, the past is the past, isn't it?
0:41:30 > 0:41:32There's no point in dwelling on that
0:41:32 > 0:41:36and as long as things stay as good as they are now, I'm happy and...
0:41:36 > 0:41:40Yeah, they will do, yeah, they will. Cos I'm happy,
0:41:40 > 0:41:43I'm the happiest I've been in a lot of years. I really am.
0:41:48 > 0:41:50'Hello, Mr Camel.'
0:41:50 > 0:41:54One of my happiest childhood memories is visiting the Welsh Mountain Zoo with my granddad.
0:41:54 > 0:41:57'There's the monkey house and oh, yes,
0:41:57 > 0:42:03'look at this monkey. This is the wild monkey of the zoo.
0:42:03 > 0:42:06'Oh, look at that one climbing up. A silver spider.
0:42:06 > 0:42:10- 'I think a marmoset.- Oh, Marmoset. - Baby marmoset.'
0:42:10 > 0:42:13The zoo has always been a special place to me
0:42:13 > 0:42:17so I'm really pleased my dad has been accepted to do voluntary work.
0:42:17 > 0:42:19'There's a clown. Hello.'
0:42:22 > 0:42:26I'm shaving because it's the first day at the work, at the zoo,
0:42:26 > 0:42:29and I don't want to look scruffy.
0:42:31 > 0:42:32And...
0:42:34 > 0:42:38Bev's told me off you see, as she does.
0:42:39 > 0:42:42I've got to do this because all my hair sticks up at the back.
0:42:45 > 0:42:47Yeah, I think I look presentable.
0:42:47 > 0:42:50Let me look at your shaving. Right, missed some there.
0:42:50 > 0:42:53I don't know why that bit sticks up all the time.
0:42:53 > 0:42:57- Is it still sticking up? - Nevermind, leave it. That's the way your hair is.
0:42:57 > 0:42:59- What is that?- This?- Yeah.
0:42:59 > 0:43:03- It's aftershave.- Oh, oh, I see.
0:43:03 > 0:43:06Do you think they'll have a few women there?
0:43:06 > 0:43:09You're going all tarted up with you...thank you.
0:43:09 > 0:43:14Oh, aftershave, teeth in, hair done.
0:43:14 > 0:43:16Hmmm, hmmmm.
0:43:16 > 0:43:18You'll have one of the female baboons after you.
0:43:18 > 0:43:20THEY LAUGH
0:43:20 > 0:43:24I like what you said this morning, "I'm making something of myself."
0:43:24 > 0:43:26Well, I am making something of myself, aren't I?
0:43:26 > 0:43:29Yeah, I should have made you a flask up, shouldn't I?
0:43:29 > 0:43:32- With a little sandwich box. - Well, you see.
0:43:32 > 0:43:34Shoddy, that's what you are.
0:43:35 > 0:43:38- See you later.- Bye.
0:43:41 > 0:43:44Dad is going to pick up litter one morning a week.
0:43:44 > 0:43:47All the litter's concentrated in this area.
0:43:49 > 0:43:51Chimpanzee world.
0:43:51 > 0:43:55If he proves reliable, he may be able to start looking after the animals.
0:43:59 > 0:44:02What's that? Little Stonehenge? There's a bottle there.
0:44:03 > 0:44:06And there's our sea lions.
0:44:06 > 0:44:07Oh, wow.
0:44:07 > 0:44:10I love sea lions, I think they're well top.
0:44:13 > 0:44:14Off for a swim now.
0:44:14 > 0:44:18I feel really lucky working here because I can see something
0:44:18 > 0:44:22every day, something different, something new every day.
0:44:24 > 0:44:26Oh, wow look at that.
0:44:26 > 0:44:30Mum, here! Look! It just swam right there.
0:44:33 > 0:44:37- Right, we'll go to the penguins now.- Yeah, come and see the penguins.
0:44:38 > 0:44:42I love penguins because they're dead comical, the way they walk.
0:44:45 > 0:44:47Dad's come so far.
0:44:47 > 0:44:51He's on a methadone programme, he's got his own flat,
0:44:51 > 0:44:56and now he's got his first job in 25 years, as a volunteer at the zoo.
0:44:56 > 0:44:58When I was homeless, I didn't have money
0:44:58 > 0:45:05because I used to count every bit of money I got, I'd add it up,
0:45:05 > 0:45:11and add it up, and then when I made £30, then I'd go off
0:45:11 > 0:45:14and buy some heroin and crack.
0:45:14 > 0:45:17So I'd never, never have any money in my pocket.
0:45:17 > 0:45:22Not even, you know, coppers, twos or ones, nothing like that.
0:45:22 > 0:45:25And I used to wake up every morning with nothing,
0:45:25 > 0:45:28and I'd think to myself
0:45:28 > 0:45:32"Oh, God I've got to get through another day now of begging
0:45:32 > 0:45:36"for food and for drugs."
0:45:36 > 0:45:40And it's not, it's not fun. Drugs are not fun.
0:45:49 > 0:45:53When I heard my dad had got a volunteer placement at the zoo,
0:45:53 > 0:45:56I couldn't have been prouder. I was so happy
0:45:56 > 0:45:58and I thought, that's it,
0:45:58 > 0:46:04he's getting better and he seems so excited and he says he's never been happier.
0:46:04 > 0:46:05And then...
0:46:05 > 0:46:10it was about a week or so later that I found the drugs.
0:46:18 > 0:46:21Sometimes, Dad will stay over to look after Mum,
0:46:21 > 0:46:24and if I'm not around, he sleeps in my bed.
0:46:24 > 0:46:28I was in my room packing to go to college
0:46:28 > 0:46:31when I found something I'd never seen before.
0:46:32 > 0:46:36I lifted a T-shirt up and this tiny packet of,
0:46:36 > 0:46:39looked like brown, kind of, dried up dirt, almost,
0:46:39 > 0:46:43and I was like, you know, I'd no idea what it was.
0:46:43 > 0:46:46"What's this?" I said, "What do you mean, what's this?"
0:46:46 > 0:46:50She said, "Oh, I found it in my clothes." I said, "It's rubbish, I don't know, it's rubbish.
0:46:50 > 0:46:55"I don't know what it is." And she said, "Well, I'm going asking my dad."
0:46:57 > 0:47:02He took it off me and like looked at it for a minute and was like, "Oh, I don't know, I'll throw it away."
0:47:02 > 0:47:06And I said, "OK," and then he went out onto the decking,
0:47:06 > 0:47:09and I thought he was just going to put it in the rubbish bin.
0:47:09 > 0:47:12I got a bit suspicious of him, the way he reacted.
0:47:12 > 0:47:16So I went out to the door and just looked.
0:47:16 > 0:47:20I saw him...pretend to throw something over the balcony
0:47:20 > 0:47:23and then actually shove it in his pocket
0:47:23 > 0:47:26and pull his t-shirt down over his pocket.
0:47:26 > 0:47:29Then it kind of clicked that it might be something a bit odd.
0:47:29 > 0:47:34I went on the internet and just typed in 'brown powdered drugs'.
0:47:34 > 0:47:37And the first thing that came up was heroin.
0:47:37 > 0:47:41I just remember feeling completely cold.
0:47:41 > 0:47:45I didn't know what to do, so I left for my week at college
0:47:45 > 0:47:48without talking to Mum or Dad about it.
0:47:48 > 0:47:50At college, I spoke to two of my tutors
0:47:50 > 0:47:54who suggested I confront him the following weekend
0:47:54 > 0:47:57when someone else was there.
0:47:57 > 0:48:00If he was innocent, he was likely to talk it through.
0:48:00 > 0:48:04But if he was guilty, he would probably deny it and storm off.
0:48:08 > 0:48:12As soon as I got home, I put all my stuff in my room,
0:48:12 > 0:48:14and my dad was sat outside having a cigarette,
0:48:14 > 0:48:17and I stood outside,
0:48:17 > 0:48:22and I just stood there, and I remember trying to pluck up the courage to say it.
0:48:22 > 0:48:26I was like, "Go on, Jazz, just say it, just get it over with."
0:48:26 > 0:48:28And I eventually said,
0:48:28 > 0:48:32"Dad, what I found last weekend, I know exactly what it was,
0:48:32 > 0:48:37"and I want you to tell the truth and admit it and we can try and work through this."
0:48:37 > 0:48:38And he just stood up,
0:48:38 > 0:48:42and he just stormed round the house getting his shoes on.
0:48:42 > 0:48:44I said, "Look, Dad,
0:48:44 > 0:48:47"if you were innocent you'd just sit down and talk to me, you know,
0:48:47 > 0:48:50"you'd deny it and try and defend yourself."
0:48:50 > 0:48:52He walked off down the hill and didn't say anything.
0:48:52 > 0:48:55The next morning, I texted my dad saying,
0:48:55 > 0:48:59"I don't want to argue, Dad, I just want to know the truth."
0:48:59 > 0:49:03And he texted me straight back saying,
0:49:03 > 0:49:04"I'm sorry, I've messed up,
0:49:04 > 0:49:08"I've took heroin three times in the last two weeks."
0:49:11 > 0:49:14I remember just feeling completely numb.
0:49:14 > 0:49:17The minute I saw that text, I lost all respect for him.
0:49:21 > 0:49:24Dad told me someone had offered to sell him heroin
0:49:24 > 0:49:25and it played on his mind.
0:49:27 > 0:49:29I ended up saying, "Will you go and get me some?"
0:49:29 > 0:49:32A foolish, foolish thing to do.
0:49:33 > 0:49:37I took heroin again to see if it had a hold of me
0:49:37 > 0:49:39or I missed it.
0:49:39 > 0:49:41I don't miss it.
0:49:41 > 0:49:46I don't want it in my life and it was a big, big mistake.
0:49:51 > 0:49:56He's chosen drugs over me again, you know, he did when I was born
0:49:56 > 0:50:00and he's done it again and I just, I feel worthless because of it.
0:50:00 > 0:50:04I feel like somebody's died, you know.
0:50:04 > 0:50:06Part of me's died inside.
0:50:09 > 0:50:11Part of Jasmine has.
0:50:18 > 0:50:22I don't have any regrets because she had to meet him,
0:50:22 > 0:50:23she had to know him.
0:50:23 > 0:50:27And I warned her all the time, he could go back to drugs,
0:50:27 > 0:50:31and then again he could become the person that we want him to be.
0:50:35 > 0:50:40Heroin is evil and it destroys lives.
0:50:40 > 0:50:45And it not only destroys that person's life who's taking it
0:50:45 > 0:50:49but it destroys everyone's lives around them.
0:50:50 > 0:50:56I know that my dad can't help it because that's all he's ever known
0:50:56 > 0:51:00and he's been taking heroin for so many years,
0:51:00 > 0:51:02it's completely taken over him.
0:51:05 > 0:51:09The future of Paul is in Paul's hands.
0:51:10 > 0:51:1317 years ago, my mum asked dad to stay away.
0:51:13 > 0:51:16Now it was my turn to do the same thing.
0:51:17 > 0:51:19It's the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
0:51:21 > 0:51:23My dad's still living in Colwyn Bay.
0:51:23 > 0:51:26But he's in his flat on his own.
0:51:26 > 0:51:28I'm heartbroken.
0:51:28 > 0:51:30I've lost Bev and Jazz.
0:51:30 > 0:51:35And that just hurts so, so much.
0:51:35 > 0:51:37For a little bit of brown powder...
0:51:41 > 0:51:45..I've, you know, lost their trust, their respect.
0:51:51 > 0:51:53I just wish I hadn't done it.
0:51:57 > 0:52:01My dad hopes to continue to volunteer at the zoo
0:52:01 > 0:52:04and says he's going to go into detox as soon as he can.
0:52:06 > 0:52:08I don't want drugs to be in my life.
0:52:08 > 0:52:12I want...I want to be a family more than I want drugs.
0:52:12 > 0:52:16And if they don't accept me back when I've done detox,
0:52:16 > 0:52:18I'll miss them forever.
0:52:30 > 0:52:33But Dad's relapse won't stop me living my life.
0:52:33 > 0:52:37I'm just really nervous. I don't like getting up in front of people anyway.
0:52:37 > 0:52:41It's the end of the college year and time for the student awards.
0:52:42 > 0:52:46- Who's coming today, then, Jazz? - What, to support me?
0:52:46 > 0:52:51- Yeah.- My mum.- Yeah.- And she's, like, obviously super excited.
0:52:52 > 0:52:55- I'm gutted that my dad's not going to be there.- Yeah.
0:52:55 > 0:52:58So do you think you'll ever let your dad back in your life, then?
0:53:00 > 0:53:04Erm... It's definitely too early to tell,
0:53:04 > 0:53:09I don't want to make any decisions that I'm going to regret.
0:53:09 > 0:53:14I don't want him to be on any kind of drug rehabilitation programme,
0:53:14 > 0:53:16I don't want him to be on methadone.
0:53:16 > 0:53:19I don't want him to be on any kind of drug at all.
0:53:20 > 0:53:25Got loads of spots, oh, God, I look horrible.
0:53:28 > 0:53:32For me, getting back into mainstream education has been a big challenge,
0:53:32 > 0:53:37as I left school when I was 13 after being badly bullied.
0:53:37 > 0:53:41On each course here, the students vote for the person they think most deserves an award.
0:53:41 > 0:53:44Are you nervous?
0:53:44 > 0:53:47- Yes.- Why? Don't need to be.
0:53:47 > 0:53:51Jazz, be proud.
0:53:51 > 0:53:57I kept looking over at my mum for support and the first time I looked over I was expecting to see my dad
0:53:57 > 0:54:00because I'd been waiting so long for him to come to something like this
0:54:00 > 0:54:03and we planned it from the very first day I met him,
0:54:03 > 0:54:07that he was going to be in my life watching me achieve my dreams
0:54:07 > 0:54:09and now he's just blown it all.
0:54:09 > 0:54:14This event is about celebrating the success of land-based learners.
0:54:14 > 0:54:18The room is full of proud family members or friends or parents
0:54:18 > 0:54:23and I almost want to sort of go, that's my daughter there.
0:54:23 > 0:54:27But I don't need to because it's bloody obvious!
0:54:29 > 0:54:32And for Animal Care Level 2, Jasmine Burkitt.
0:54:37 > 0:54:39'I'm just very proud of her.'
0:54:39 > 0:54:45In less than 12 months she has grown up and matured so much educationally
0:54:45 > 0:54:49that she has got all distinctions in her assignments.
0:54:55 > 0:54:59This award has got my blood, sweat and tears in it, honestly.
0:54:59 > 0:55:05I've worked so hard and I'm so relieved now that it's all paid off and I've got this, yes!
0:55:08 > 0:55:15Oh, there's no words to explain how proud we are of her.
0:55:15 > 0:55:18She's just unbelievable, isn't she?
0:55:20 > 0:55:22She hadn't had a dad, so I had to step in there and be that.
0:55:22 > 0:55:25Whee! Splash!
0:55:25 > 0:55:28She's given me seventeen and a half years of a wonderful lifestyle.
0:55:28 > 0:55:32It's been great and I would do it all again.
0:55:32 > 0:55:36- Got a picture of me, Grandad? - That is brilliant, love. Brilliant, brilliant...
0:55:36 > 0:55:40She is now a bright and brilliant seventeen and a half year old,
0:55:40 > 0:55:43she's educated herself to a very large extent, brilliantly,
0:55:43 > 0:55:47gets on with things and I'm just proud of her.
0:55:47 > 0:55:49Very, very proud.
0:55:49 > 0:55:53SHE SOBS
0:55:53 > 0:55:55I can't believe it!
0:55:55 > 0:55:58She has fantastic friendships,
0:55:58 > 0:56:00and some brilliant family.
0:56:00 > 0:56:03Group hug. Whoo!
0:56:03 > 0:56:06So, I think between us all, love heals.
0:56:11 > 0:56:14'I've told Dad he's got to be totally clean of drugs
0:56:14 > 0:56:19'if he's ever going to be part of my life again.
0:56:19 > 0:56:22'Until then, it's just me and Mum.
0:56:22 > 0:56:26'We're so different, but we work so well together,
0:56:26 > 0:56:29'and we love each other more now'
0:56:29 > 0:56:34than we ever did and I think that we're going to be OK.
0:56:43 > 0:56:46Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:56:46 > 0:56:50E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk