One Man, Three Wives with Yalda Hakim

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:00:00. > :00:00.wives in polygamous marriages has just come into force in Kenya. For

:00:00. > :00:08.Our World, Yalda Hakim has been to find out what life is like for

:00:09. > :00:15.polygamous men and their wives. A man in Kenya can marry a second wife

:00:16. > :00:21.and his first wife need never know. And then he can marry another one

:00:22. > :00:35.and another one and another one, all with the blessing of the government.

:00:36. > :00:45.I hate polygyny. I don't think it is right at all. When you marry an

:00:46. > :00:49.African woman, she must know that the second one is on the way, the

:00:50. > :00:56.third one is on the way, the fourth one is on the way. A new Kenyan law

:00:57. > :00:58.gives polygamous marriages the same status as monogamous ones and legal

:00:59. > :01:17.recognition to the multiple wives. Is this a return to traditional

:01:18. > :01:19.African values? Or is it the beginning of a new battle of the

:01:20. > :01:46.sexes. In the heart of East Africa's rift

:01:47. > :01:58.Valley, like generations of Maasai women before her, Mary is making

:01:59. > :02:03.breakfast for her husband. A few metres away in another small

:02:04. > :02:14.building, choice is also making breakfast for her husband. And

:02:15. > :02:24.outside in the chilly dawn, Alice is getting milk for her husband's

:02:25. > :02:40.morning tea. All three women are married to the same man. Is I is 76

:02:41. > :02:46.years old `` Isaiah. He has three wives, 16 children and 48

:02:47. > :02:47.grandchildren. Alice is as they're's first wife and as such has

:02:48. > :03:32.some authority over the other's. The women had little say in when or

:03:33. > :03:34.who they were to marry. Mary was only 16 when she was told she was to

:03:35. > :03:50.become a second wife. After 40 years of marriage, she says

:03:51. > :04:27.she feels no jealousy and is glad to have co` wives.

:04:28. > :04:33.But Joyce, Isaiah's third wife, would have preferred it if things

:04:34. > :04:52.had been different. Each wife has her own house, which

:04:53. > :04:53.she shares with her children. What is the relationship life with your

:04:54. > :05:29.husband? And they take good care of you? Yes,

:05:30. > :05:35.they love, they love. All of Isaiah's sums are being educated and

:05:36. > :05:40.some have been to university. But for his daughters, the only choice

:05:41. > :05:41.is marriage. Polygamous marriage. And they could go on to become

:05:42. > :05:58.second, third or even fourth wives. Maasai community worker Joyce 's

:05:59. > :06:05.clear where she stands on polygyny. I hate polygyny. I don't think it is

:06:06. > :06:26.right at all. No matter what they say.

:06:27. > :06:30.This 56`year`old woman was just 15 when she was married off to a much

:06:31. > :06:54.older man who already had a wife. Initially, the teenager was

:06:55. > :06:56.miserable but grew to love her husband and they had ten children.

:06:57. > :07:26.But that was not enough for him. She had married her husband in a

:07:27. > :07:30.traditional way and like most such marriages, it was not registered

:07:31. > :07:34.with the authorities, so despite having ten children, she could not

:07:35. > :07:39.actually prove they had been married. And that meant that when

:07:40. > :07:48.her husband died, she had few rights to his land and property and faced

:07:49. > :07:50.being disinherited. Now, she gets by with a market stall and by sharing a

:07:51. > :08:31.house with her husband's third wife. But Kenya's new marriage act for the

:08:32. > :08:39.first time gives legal recognition to such marriages. And it requires

:08:40. > :08:42.that each marriage is registered. Women's groups and campaigners have

:08:43. > :08:44.been trying for decades to get this law passed because they say it

:08:45. > :08:52.protects women in polygamous marriages. Winnie is one of the few

:08:53. > :09:12.women to make it into Kenya's parliament.

:09:13. > :09:17.But she voted for the bill because although she believes polygyny is

:09:18. > :09:27.wrong, the new law does at least offer some protection to wives. She

:09:28. > :09:34.herself is in a vulnerable position. Her marriage is a traditional one

:09:35. > :09:38.and is not registered. If her husband died, she could be

:09:39. > :09:40.disinherited, and even while he is alive, she has little power in the

:09:41. > :10:06.relationship. Your husband can bring another

:10:07. > :10:11.woman? During the debate on this new marriage law, MPs, most of them men,

:10:12. > :10:15.voted down a controversial clause which would have forced any man

:10:16. > :10:20.wanting to take another wife to tell existing wives of their intention.

:10:21. > :10:26.Not to ask permission but merely to inform them. If you are the man of

:10:27. > :10:30.the house and you choose to bring home another party and make it two

:10:31. > :10:36.or three, it behoves you to be man enough to agree that you... When you

:10:37. > :10:42.marry an African woman, she must know that a second one is on the

:10:43. > :10:46.way, the third one is on the way, the fourth one is on the way. This

:10:47. > :10:50.is Africa, mistress weaker. This is not Europe, Mr Speaker. This is not

:10:51. > :11:06.America. Opponents to the clause say there

:11:07. > :11:31.isn't any point making laws no one will follow.

:11:32. > :11:37.Like many educated urban women, Wanjiku Muhia is clear what she

:11:38. > :12:00.would do if her husband brought home a second wife.

:12:01. > :12:04.This man runs a men's empowerment group, because he is convinced

:12:05. > :13:21.Kenyan men have a hard time. I was struck by the fact that these

:13:22. > :13:25.men strongly believe that as women have gained more rights in Kenya,

:13:26. > :13:27.they have somehow been deprived of their rights and they really have

:13:28. > :14:05.quite strong grievances. And look for a third and fourth.

:14:06. > :14:10.What makes men think that if the first and second doesn't respect

:14:11. > :14:38.you, a third and fourth wheel? `` will?

:14:39. > :14:45.It is not just in rural areas where this entrant tradition is practised.

:14:46. > :14:52.Polygamy is flourishing in the heart of Nairobi `` ancient tradition. In

:14:53. > :14:59.Africa's largest slum, this man splits his time between two wives

:15:00. > :15:03.who live ten minutes apart. He first married Veronica 17 years ago and

:15:04. > :15:34.they have five children. When things went wrong, he took radical action.

:15:35. > :15:39.The couple had had a customary wedding and he comes from the tribe

:15:40. > :16:19.where polygamy is common. Neither of his wives rely on him for

:16:20. > :16:24.money to raise the children. They compete for his attention. One

:16:25. > :16:29.source of conflict is the amount of time he spent in each home. Do you

:16:30. > :16:43.think two nights a month is too little? Two nights per month? No. I

:16:44. > :16:51.am saying no. Tell the truth. Last month... OK. Only last month is when

:16:52. > :17:02.he gave me three days. Always two days or one day. Living just a few

:17:03. > :17:07.streets away was his second wife, Bridget. He married her six years

:17:08. > :17:08.ago and they have three children. She felt the wrath of the first wife

:17:09. > :17:45.from the start. Despite the obvious stressors,

:17:46. > :17:47.Morris has been married to two different women `` says being

:17:48. > :18:00.married to two different women has its compensations.

:18:01. > :18:25.The sense I am getting from the man that I am speaking to is that

:18:26. > :18:31.polygamy works and that the relationships can be balanced. When

:18:32. > :18:36.I speak to the women, they are deeply upset. Especially the first

:18:37. > :18:43.wives, who don't welcome the arrival of a new woman into their

:18:44. > :19:25.relationships. The marriage is always controlled by a man.

:19:26. > :19:29.Campaigners are encouraging Kenyan women to consider the option of a

:19:30. > :19:39.civil or church marriage, which doesn't allow polygamy. This law has

:19:40. > :19:42.divided the country. Some see it as safeguarding African Customs. Others

:19:43. > :19:48.accuse it of being sexist and old`fashioned. This makes a woman

:19:49. > :19:51.feel like an object. But a man can walk out in the morning and come

:19:52. > :19:57.back with another wife without consulting the wife. Imagine a

:19:58. > :20:02.man's first wife is 45 years, and brings in a 19`year`old girl. How

:20:03. > :20:06.would a 45`year`old woman compete with a 19`year`old girl in all

:20:07. > :20:12.matters? In the bedroom. It makes women feel vulnerable. Women will

:20:13. > :20:18.also look for younger men. Then, you see men in the streets fighting.

:20:19. > :20:23.Although this controversial law offers some legal protection to

:20:24. > :20:26.women in polygamous marriages, it endorses a man's right to deceive

:20:27. > :20:35.his wife or wives over and over again. And, these young Kenyans,

:20:36. > :20:39.living a modern Nairobi lifestyle, reflect this contradiction. Despite

:20:40. > :20:39.a global outlook, many are also drawn to traditional African

:20:40. > :21:55.values. Let me ask, would you ever inbuilt

:21:56. > :22:12.in a polygamous marriage? `` indulge.

:22:13. > :22:24.Bad, you don't want that for yourself? `` but.

:22:25. > :22:32.Meanwhile, in the Rift Valley, life continues relatively unchanged by

:22:33. > :22:37.the new law. Alice and Mary weren't able to stop her husband marrying

:22:38. > :22:47.again. What if their daughters and daughters of Kenya's generations to

:22:48. > :22:55.come? `` and what of. How would this law impact of their lives and their

:22:56. > :23:11.future marriages? `` impact of their lives.

:23:12. > :23:16.The weekend is upon us and most of us hope for fine weather. It isn't

:23:17. > :23:22.looking bad. Summarising the weekend. It will be a tad cooler

:23:23. > :23:26.compared with the last few days. A dry weekend for most of us, apart

:23:27. > :23:30.from a couple of showers. It will be a little other cloudy site. This is

:23:31. > :23:32.the sunshine we had on Friday, it is a little more cloudy in Scotland and

:23:33. > :23:33.Northern Ireland, however