Rich Hall's Presidential Grudge Match

0:00:02 > 0:00:10This programme contains some strong language

0:00:13 > 0:00:15When I was a kid, my mom said,

0:00:15 > 0:00:17"Work hard, you can become president,"

0:00:17 > 0:00:19cos I grew up in a Disney film.

0:00:19 > 0:00:20That was back when we believed

0:00:20 > 0:00:23that presidents were righteous and honourable,

0:00:23 > 0:00:26cos, after all, they were president.

0:00:26 > 0:00:30And that died in about 1974 with Richard Nixon, Watergate,

0:00:30 > 0:00:32blah-blah, blah-blah, blah-blah-blah-blah.

0:00:32 > 0:00:35"But, Rich, can anybody be president?"

0:00:35 > 0:00:36Well, that depends on your circumstances.

0:00:36 > 0:00:39If you find yourself standing outside of a Walmart bathroom

0:00:39 > 0:00:40at three in the morning,

0:00:40 > 0:00:43waiting on the results of your girlfriend's pregnancy test,

0:00:43 > 0:00:45no, you're not going to be president.

0:00:45 > 0:00:48"But I've watched every episode of West Wing.

0:00:48 > 0:00:49"I want to change the world."

0:00:49 > 0:00:52Screw you. Go start a soup kitchen.

0:00:52 > 0:00:54Being president is a hard job,

0:00:54 > 0:00:57and you really, really have to want it.

0:00:58 > 0:01:01When you're president, you've got thousands of bosses.

0:01:01 > 0:01:04Half of them demand stuff way outside your job description.

0:01:04 > 0:01:08The other half wouldn't mind too terribly if you were dead.

0:01:08 > 0:01:11So you need Disney-sized motivation,

0:01:11 > 0:01:14the kind of motivation that craves abuse.

0:01:14 > 0:01:16And here's the kicker.

0:01:16 > 0:01:19There's a pretty good chance the job is going to kill you.

0:01:20 > 0:01:22Of the 43 men who've been president,

0:01:22 > 0:01:26four have been assassinated, all by gunshots.

0:01:26 > 0:01:28Another 13 presidents have been shot at,

0:01:28 > 0:01:30had grenades thrown at them,

0:01:30 > 0:01:31car bombs planted,

0:01:31 > 0:01:33or someone tried to crash their plane.

0:01:33 > 0:01:36And for every president who's been killed on the job,

0:01:36 > 0:01:38there's another one where the job killed them.

0:01:38 > 0:01:39Franklin Roosevelt

0:01:39 > 0:01:42and Warren G Harding keeled over from heart attacks.

0:01:42 > 0:01:45Zachary Taylor ate some bad cherries

0:01:45 > 0:01:48during a Fourth of July celebration at Washington Monument,

0:01:48 > 0:01:50died of severe diarrhoea.

0:01:50 > 0:01:52William Henry Harrison caught pneumonia

0:01:52 > 0:01:54right after his inauguration.

0:01:54 > 0:01:57Doctors treated him with leeches and Virginia snakeroot.

0:01:57 > 0:02:00He died after being president for only 32 days.

0:02:02 > 0:02:04Still want the job? Fine.

0:02:04 > 0:02:06Just make sure that you're rich, a white Protestant male

0:02:06 > 0:02:08and a Freemason.

0:02:08 > 0:02:11Or ugly, born in a log cabin and clinically depressed.

0:02:11 > 0:02:13Because one thing is for certain -

0:02:13 > 0:02:18if being POTUS doesn't kill you, it's going to prematurely age you.

0:02:18 > 0:02:19Just look at Obama.

0:02:19 > 0:02:22When he came into office, he was a good-looking, vibrant man.

0:02:22 > 0:02:24Now look at him.

0:02:24 > 0:02:25Face like a used tyre.

0:02:28 > 0:02:29So, according to the odds,

0:02:29 > 0:02:32there's roughly a 40% chance that, as president,

0:02:32 > 0:02:35somebody's going to try to assassinate you.

0:02:35 > 0:02:39But there is a 100% chance of character assassination.

0:02:39 > 0:02:42# People, won't you come together?

0:02:44 > 0:02:46# We've all got to live as one

0:02:48 > 0:02:51# I ain't right sure what that means

0:02:51 > 0:02:54# But don't you reckon it sounds like fun?

0:02:55 > 0:02:59# Everybody pack your picnic lunch

0:02:59 > 0:03:02# And everybody pack your gun

0:03:02 > 0:03:04# Cos we...

0:03:04 > 0:03:07# Can't trust no-one

0:03:10 > 0:03:12# No, you...

0:03:12 > 0:03:15# Can't trust no-one. #

0:03:21 > 0:03:23I'm really excited.

0:03:23 > 0:03:26How many people here are ready to turn the White House red again?

0:03:26 > 0:03:29CHEERING

0:03:29 > 0:03:31How many people here

0:03:31 > 0:03:33are ready to go out there and tell Hillary Clinton

0:03:33 > 0:03:35what difference it really makes?

0:03:35 > 0:03:37What difference does it make?

0:03:37 > 0:03:38APPLAUSE

0:03:41 > 0:03:44I'm here at the Presidential Town Hall, and these Bush supporters

0:03:44 > 0:03:46are feeling very good about their candidate.

0:03:46 > 0:03:48What do you say, guys?

0:03:48 > 0:03:52An election is a thing that happens every four years in America,

0:03:52 > 0:03:56where we get to watch a lot of ego-obsessed men and women

0:03:56 > 0:03:59say crazy things, trip over mic cables,

0:03:59 > 0:04:04insult each other, and generally engage in a series of antics

0:04:04 > 0:04:08that makes us briefly forget we live in a world of destructive policies

0:04:08 > 0:04:13and a state of grim hopelessness created by these very fucksticks.

0:04:13 > 0:04:15Donald Trump likes to sue people.

0:04:15 > 0:04:17He should sue whoever did that to his face.

0:04:17 > 0:04:19Given that being president of the United States

0:04:19 > 0:04:22could very likely put you in a premature grave,

0:04:22 > 0:04:25it's fairly astonishing that at the beginning of 2016,

0:04:25 > 0:04:2823 hopeful Americans threw their hat in the ring

0:04:28 > 0:04:30for the nation's top job.

0:04:30 > 0:04:34At some point, every one of these candidates has looked in the mirror

0:04:34 > 0:04:37and said to themselves, "You know what this country needs?

0:04:37 > 0:04:38"Me."

0:04:38 > 0:04:40That's the kind of haploid, diploid,

0:04:40 > 0:04:44megalomaniacal level of self-delusion you need

0:04:44 > 0:04:45to run for president.

0:04:45 > 0:04:47CHEERING

0:04:49 > 0:04:52When I'm president, we're getting rid of Obamacare.

0:04:52 > 0:04:54They all talk about passion, service,

0:04:54 > 0:04:57wanting to do it for their country.

0:04:57 > 0:04:59Of course there's a huge amount of ego involved in all of this.

0:04:59 > 0:05:03I turned out to be 100% right on illegal immigration.

0:05:03 > 0:05:06People, two weeks ago, they were going after me, even the reporters.

0:05:06 > 0:05:08You're talking about a group of men -

0:05:08 > 0:05:10and so far, they've all been men -

0:05:10 > 0:05:13who have been basically convinced from birth

0:05:13 > 0:05:16that they were the centre of the universe.

0:05:16 > 0:05:18Most of the people running for president

0:05:18 > 0:05:22actually believe that they have a talent,

0:05:22 > 0:05:27a philosophy, an ideology, an ability to lead people,

0:05:27 > 0:05:30really an extraordinary gift.

0:05:30 > 0:05:33And if they don't, we generally find out really quickly.

0:05:33 > 0:05:36And where do we find out?

0:05:36 > 0:05:38On the campaign trail.

0:05:38 > 0:05:41When I'm president, you will not get in to the United States of America.

0:05:41 > 0:05:42It's going to get tough.

0:05:42 > 0:05:44You're going to be on the road for two years.

0:05:44 > 0:05:46You're going to spend up to 1 billion.

0:05:46 > 0:05:49You're going to expend a whole lot of shoe leather,

0:05:49 > 0:05:51and you're going to have to make some bold statements.

0:05:51 > 0:05:53A total and complete shutdown

0:05:53 > 0:05:56of Muslims entering the United States.

0:05:56 > 0:05:58You're going to get attacked.

0:05:58 > 0:06:01Your past and your family are going to come under intense scrutiny,

0:06:01 > 0:06:04and God help you if you've got any dirty laundry.

0:06:04 > 0:06:07I am confident that I never sent nor received

0:06:07 > 0:06:10any information that was classified at the time it was sent...

0:06:10 > 0:06:13If you're going to be POTUS, President of the United States,

0:06:13 > 0:06:15you're going to have to fight dirty,

0:06:15 > 0:06:18because it's the most downright gruelling election on the planet.

0:06:18 > 0:06:21There's nothing easy about running for president, I can tell you.

0:06:21 > 0:06:25It's tough, it's nasty, it's mean, it's vicious.

0:06:25 > 0:06:26It's beautiful.

0:06:26 > 0:06:28LAUGHTER

0:06:28 > 0:06:31And you know what? It's all been done before.

0:06:33 > 0:06:36Ten, nine, eight, seven,

0:06:36 > 0:06:38six, five,

0:06:38 > 0:06:40four, three,

0:06:40 > 0:06:42two, one,

0:06:42 > 0:06:44zero.

0:06:46 > 0:06:48These are the stakes.

0:06:48 > 0:06:51The 1964 presidential campaign

0:06:51 > 0:06:55between Lyndon Johnson and his challenger, Barry Goldwater,

0:06:55 > 0:06:59introduced a vicious new tactic into presidential campaigning.

0:06:59 > 0:07:00Quotemanship.

0:07:00 > 0:07:04The idea of taking what a candidate says and turning it against him.

0:07:04 > 0:07:06Johnson created a series of TV ads

0:07:06 > 0:07:10that portrayed Goldwater as some kind of deranged whack job

0:07:10 > 0:07:14who, if elected, would destroy all of mankind.

0:07:14 > 0:07:16We must either love each other...

0:07:18 > 0:07:19..or we must die.

0:07:19 > 0:07:22Vote for President Johnson on November 3rd.

0:07:22 > 0:07:26'Mr Johnson set out on a political career 27 years ago.

0:07:26 > 0:07:28'A road that led to the White House.'

0:07:28 > 0:07:30By the time of the 1964 election,

0:07:30 > 0:07:33Johnson had already been in the White House for a year,

0:07:33 > 0:07:35having stepped in after the assassination of John F Kennedy.

0:07:37 > 0:07:40He was seen as the likeable heir apparent, but...

0:07:40 > 0:07:42with a hidden agenda.

0:07:42 > 0:07:44He knows he's going to win,

0:07:44 > 0:07:48but what he wants is a huge landslide victory,

0:07:48 > 0:07:51cos remember how insecure Lyndon Johnson was.

0:07:51 > 0:07:55He was following the most popular president maybe to this day,

0:07:55 > 0:07:57and he didn't just want to win.

0:07:57 > 0:08:00He really wanted to win by a lot, because to him,

0:08:00 > 0:08:02that meant that the American people loved him

0:08:02 > 0:08:04and that, therefore, he could move forward

0:08:04 > 0:08:07out from beneath the shadow cast by the JFK presidency.

0:08:07 > 0:08:10'Since Labor Day, Senator Goldwater has travelled

0:08:10 > 0:08:13'tens of thousands of miles to discuss the issues of the campaign.'

0:08:13 > 0:08:16Goldwater made the agenda easy for Johnson.

0:08:16 > 0:08:20His slogan was, "In your heart, you know he's right!"

0:08:20 > 0:08:22And he was. Extreme right.

0:08:22 > 0:08:25Now, Goldwater was an accomplished senator

0:08:25 > 0:08:28and ex-air-force pilot, very close friend of the late JFK,

0:08:28 > 0:08:31but he didn't care much for Russia or China

0:08:31 > 0:08:33or any other commie red bastard,

0:08:33 > 0:08:35and he didn't bother trying to soft-soap it.

0:08:35 > 0:08:38And we must make clear...

0:08:38 > 0:08:42that until its goals of conquest are absolutely renounced,

0:08:42 > 0:08:46and its relations with all nations tempered,

0:08:46 > 0:08:50communism and the governments it now controls

0:08:50 > 0:08:55are enemies of every man on earth who is or wants to be free.

0:08:55 > 0:08:57CHEERING

0:08:57 > 0:08:59In terms of articulation,

0:08:59 > 0:09:02let's compare that to a modern-day candidate

0:09:02 > 0:09:05with a whole team of speechwriters and researchers at his disposal.

0:09:05 > 0:09:08Hey, I'm not saying they're stupid.

0:09:08 > 0:09:09I like China.

0:09:09 > 0:09:14I sell apartment for... I just sold an apartment for 15 million...

0:09:14 > 0:09:16to somebody from China.

0:09:16 > 0:09:18Am I supposed to dislike them?

0:09:21 > 0:09:25Goldwater had all the oratorical tools - alliteration,

0:09:25 > 0:09:27assonance, litotes,

0:09:27 > 0:09:29pleonasms, exclamations,

0:09:29 > 0:09:32epigrams, classical quotes -

0:09:32 > 0:09:34way more than the average American could absorb.

0:09:34 > 0:09:38When he accepted the Republican nomination in San Francisco in 1964,

0:09:38 > 0:09:41he pretty much dropped the Trumpism of his day.

0:09:41 > 0:09:44I would remind you

0:09:44 > 0:09:46that extremism...

0:09:46 > 0:09:50in the defence of liberty is no vice.

0:09:50 > 0:09:52CHEERING

0:09:52 > 0:09:54Hard-core Republicans lapped this up.

0:09:54 > 0:09:57Finally, a guy not willing to kowtow to the reds.

0:09:57 > 0:10:01The more moderate Republicans, however, were genuinely flummoxed.

0:10:01 > 0:10:04Future President Richard Nixon had to turn and explain to his buddy

0:10:04 > 0:10:06what Goldwater had just said,

0:10:06 > 0:10:08like someone who didn't quite get a Frankie Boyle joke.

0:10:08 > 0:10:11Never mind that he was quitting Cicero,

0:10:11 > 0:10:14the man who pretty much laid the foundation for practical democracy.

0:10:14 > 0:10:16Nope, his opponents took the word "extremism"

0:10:16 > 0:10:19and milked it for all it was worth.

0:10:19 > 0:10:20And in no time at all,

0:10:20 > 0:10:24they had him starring in a one-man version of Mississippi Burning.

0:10:24 > 0:10:27"We represent the majority of the people in Alabama

0:10:27 > 0:10:30"who hate niggerism, Catholicism, Judaism

0:10:30 > 0:10:32"and all the isms of the whole world."

0:10:32 > 0:10:37So said Robert Creel of the Alabama Ku Klux Klan. He also said...

0:10:37 > 0:10:40"I like Barry Goldwater. He needs our help."

0:10:43 > 0:10:48Unlike the stentorian Goldwater, Johnson was a folksy down-home Texan

0:10:48 > 0:10:50who used the Oval Office to further Kennedy's agenda

0:10:50 > 0:10:52of progressive social reform,

0:10:52 > 0:10:55eradicate poverty, promote civil rights,

0:10:55 > 0:10:58and order lots of slacks.

0:10:58 > 0:11:02'Joe, is your father the one that makes clothes?'

0:11:02 > 0:11:05- 'Yes, sir. We're all together.' - 'Uh-huh.

0:11:05 > 0:11:10'Y'all made me some real lightweight slacks.

0:11:10 > 0:11:12'Now, I need about six pairs

0:11:12 > 0:11:15'for around in the evening when I come in from work.

0:11:15 > 0:11:17'The pockets, when you sit down in a chair,

0:11:17 > 0:11:19'the knife and your money comes out,

0:11:19 > 0:11:22'so I need it at least another inch in the pockets.

0:11:22 > 0:11:26'Now, another thing - the crotch down where your nuts hang

0:11:26 > 0:11:29'is always a little too tight, so when you make them up,

0:11:29 > 0:11:32'give me an inch that I can let out there,

0:11:32 > 0:11:34'because they cut me.

0:11:34 > 0:11:37'It's just like riding a wire fence.'

0:11:37 > 0:11:40Why, this knife-wielding, pecker-cramped good old boy

0:11:40 > 0:11:43was determined to spend another four years in the White House,

0:11:43 > 0:11:45and nothing was going to get in his way.

0:11:45 > 0:11:50Goldwater never had a chance, systematically bombarded by TV ads

0:11:50 > 0:11:53that all implied every child in America was doomed.

0:11:53 > 0:11:56Do you know what people finally did?

0:11:56 > 0:11:59They got together and signed a nuclear test ban treaty.

0:11:59 > 0:12:04But now there's a man who wants to be president of the United States

0:12:04 > 0:12:10and if he's elected, they might start testing all over again.

0:12:10 > 0:12:12The best that Goldwater could do to counter this assertion

0:12:12 > 0:12:16was to drag out the Duke himself, old John Wayne,

0:12:16 > 0:12:18to provide some kind of weird cryptic voice-over

0:12:18 > 0:12:21that, frankly, made no sense whatsoever.

0:12:21 > 0:12:24An umbrella - just that,

0:12:24 > 0:12:27or the symbol for appeasement?

0:12:27 > 0:12:29A table - just that,

0:12:29 > 0:12:31or a sell-out abroad?

0:12:31 > 0:12:33A wall - just that,

0:12:33 > 0:12:35unless it helps you remember

0:12:35 > 0:12:38what has happened to a billion people in this world

0:12:38 > 0:12:40and what can happen to you and to your children.

0:12:40 > 0:12:43What in the wide, wide world of sports was he talking about?

0:12:43 > 0:12:46What, there was a wall somewhere with a billion people behind it?

0:12:46 > 0:12:49The '64 campaign had turned into something that resembled

0:12:49 > 0:12:53a bitter divorced couple fighting over custody of their kids.

0:12:53 > 0:12:55'To many, of course, he is the president first

0:12:55 > 0:12:57'and a candidate second,

0:12:57 > 0:12:59'but his speeches draw a resounding cheer.'

0:13:01 > 0:13:05Lyndon Johnson decided to really turn Barry Goldwater

0:13:05 > 0:13:10into someone who terrified and horrified Americans,

0:13:10 > 0:13:12and he did it in a number of different ways.

0:13:12 > 0:13:13They wrote...

0:13:13 > 0:13:16It sounds trivial, but they wrote hundreds of letters

0:13:16 > 0:13:18to the advice columnists of the time,

0:13:18 > 0:13:20Dear Abby and Ann Landers,

0:13:20 > 0:13:24claiming to be Americans who were terrified at the thought

0:13:24 > 0:13:25of a Goldwater presidency.

0:13:25 > 0:13:28They even put out a colouring book for little children

0:13:28 > 0:13:31which portrayed Goldwater in the robes of the Ku Klux Klan,

0:13:31 > 0:13:34and then they followed up with, of course, the daisy commercial,

0:13:34 > 0:13:38which was probably the most effective campaign commercial

0:13:38 > 0:13:39in history.

0:13:44 > 0:13:46Johnson won by a landslide.

0:13:46 > 0:13:48His campaign had convinced Americans

0:13:48 > 0:13:50that if Goldwater was elected, he would start a war,

0:13:50 > 0:13:52and now, firmly re-entrenched in office,

0:13:52 > 0:13:54what do you think Johnson did?

0:13:54 > 0:13:55He went to war.

0:13:55 > 0:14:00This administration today, here and now,

0:14:00 > 0:14:05declares unconditional war on poverty in America.

0:14:07 > 0:14:10That's all the joint military chiefs of staff needed to hear.

0:14:10 > 0:14:13War. Mm! Good God, y'all.

0:14:13 > 0:14:16In March of 1965, two months after being sworn in,

0:14:16 > 0:14:19Johnson ordered 20,000 troops

0:14:19 > 0:14:22to launch an offensive against Poverty,

0:14:22 > 0:14:26a small nation on the Indochina Peninsula of Southeast Asia.

0:14:30 > 0:14:31Within 18 months,

0:14:31 > 0:14:34this incursion had increased to 200,000 troops,

0:14:34 > 0:14:38all trying to keep North Poverty from overrunning South Poverty.

0:14:40 > 0:14:44By 1967, there were more than a half-million men fighting Poverty,

0:14:44 > 0:14:46and Johnson's support plummeted

0:14:46 > 0:14:50to the point where he was the most unpopular president in modern times.

0:14:51 > 0:14:53The man who had got himself elected

0:14:53 > 0:14:56on a premise of saving America's children

0:14:56 > 0:14:58was unfortunately watching America's teenagers

0:14:58 > 0:15:00come home in body bags.

0:15:07 > 0:15:11Let's imagine for a second an alternative historical scenario.

0:15:11 > 0:15:12What if Goldwater had won?

0:15:12 > 0:15:14Let's say that LBJ pulls out of the race

0:15:14 > 0:15:16due to aggravated scrotal trauma.

0:15:16 > 0:15:17He chooses, instead,

0:15:17 > 0:15:20Hubert H Humphrey, his vice president.

0:15:20 > 0:15:23Now, Hubert Humphrey is an avuncular hack from Minnesota

0:15:23 > 0:15:25who's been pining for the job since the end of World War II.

0:15:25 > 0:15:28Nobody takes him seriously, so Goldwater wins.

0:15:28 > 0:15:30CHEERING

0:15:30 > 0:15:33Goldwater doesn't mess around in Vietnam - he ends that war

0:15:33 > 0:15:36in two weeks flat, and the world knows, don't mess with the USA.

0:15:36 > 0:15:39Unfortunately, his refusal to deal with Arab nations

0:15:39 > 0:15:42and their oil exports leads to a gas shortage.

0:15:42 > 0:15:45With a gas shortage, the auto industry stagnates.

0:15:45 > 0:15:48With no cars, America just becomes this place

0:15:48 > 0:15:49with a lot of vintage automobiles,

0:15:49 > 0:15:52really cool-looking but held together with duct tape,

0:15:52 > 0:15:57also known as Havana chrome, and the auto industry does not progress,

0:15:57 > 0:15:59thus we never get the nimble Ford Bronco,

0:15:59 > 0:16:03in which OJ Simpson leads the LAPD on a high-speed chase.

0:16:03 > 0:16:05That chase would have been on foot

0:16:05 > 0:16:07and OJ would've easily outrun the cops,

0:16:07 > 0:16:11cos let's face it - he was one of the fastest runners in the NFL.

0:16:11 > 0:16:12No OJ, no trial.

0:16:12 > 0:16:15No trial, no Robert Kardashian,

0:16:15 > 0:16:18who rose to prominence defending OJ on the murder rap.

0:16:18 > 0:16:21Robert Kardashian just would've been a two-bit ambulance-chasing

0:16:21 > 0:16:24chiseller from Los Angeles and his three daughters would be vapid,

0:16:24 > 0:16:27inconsequential bimbos, hanging out at the mall.

0:16:31 > 0:16:33It's a tragic fact that politics in America

0:16:33 > 0:16:37is coming closer to resembling a reality TV show.

0:16:37 > 0:16:39We want to see our candidates lined up in front of

0:16:39 > 0:16:42a panel of judges, like Fox News presenter Megyn Kelly,

0:16:42 > 0:16:46whose sole purpose is to create confrontation and drama

0:16:46 > 0:16:48for the TV audience.

0:16:48 > 0:16:50Your Twitter account has several disparaging comments

0:16:50 > 0:16:52about women's looks.

0:16:52 > 0:16:55You once told a contestant on Celebrity Apprentice it would be

0:16:55 > 0:16:58a pretty picture to see her on her knees.

0:16:58 > 0:17:00Does that sound to you like the temperament of

0:17:00 > 0:17:02a man we should elect as president?

0:17:02 > 0:17:04Even Obama seems to be confused

0:17:04 > 0:17:07about how he's supposed to exude presidentialness.

0:17:07 > 0:17:09Being president is a serious job.

0:17:11 > 0:17:13It's not...

0:17:13 > 0:17:17hosting a talk show or a reality show.

0:17:17 > 0:17:19No, it's not.

0:17:19 > 0:17:22So, here's Obama talking politics with Bear Grylls,

0:17:22 > 0:17:24a guy who likes to drink his own urine.

0:17:24 > 0:17:28- Would you ever encourage your girls to get into politics?- No.

0:17:28 > 0:17:30- Really?- But if they

0:17:30 > 0:17:34came to me and they said they wanted to go into elected office...

0:17:34 > 0:17:37- Yeah.- ..I would be completely supportive.- Yeah.

0:17:37 > 0:17:39Because I think it can be noble work,

0:17:39 > 0:17:42if done for the right reasons, the right way.

0:17:45 > 0:17:48But if any of these presidential wannabes were put into

0:17:48 > 0:17:51a reality show, they'd be evicted before the first commercial

0:17:51 > 0:17:55for being soulless, snooze-inducing, robotic dullards.

0:17:55 > 0:17:58Some of America's greatest journalists have tried to

0:17:58 > 0:18:01chronicle elections, and every one of them would have been better off

0:18:01 > 0:18:03following plankton for a year.

0:18:03 > 0:18:06Boys On The Bus, Timothy Crouse.

0:18:06 > 0:18:09Michael Lewis, author of Moneyball? Yeah.

0:18:09 > 0:18:13Even the estimable Hunter S Thompson, who chronicled

0:18:13 > 0:18:15the 1972 campaign between Nixon and McGovern,

0:18:15 > 0:18:18was so overcome by torpor and ennui

0:18:18 > 0:18:21that he just resorted to making stuff up about the candidates,

0:18:21 > 0:18:22just to enliven things -

0:18:22 > 0:18:26claiming, for example, that Democratic nominee Edmund Muskie

0:18:26 > 0:18:29had hired a Brazilian witch doctor to supply him with ibogaine.

0:18:29 > 0:18:32That's a hallucinogen that makes you think you're a salamander.

0:18:32 > 0:18:34Open season on voters gets under way

0:18:34 > 0:18:38as the presidential candidates start cross-country vote-hunting tours.

0:18:38 > 0:18:42MUSIC: Ramblin' Man by The Allman Brothers Band

0:18:42 > 0:18:44What Americans want is to be wooed

0:18:44 > 0:18:47by old-fashioned grassroots campaigning,

0:18:47 > 0:18:50which means crossing the country by bus and plane,

0:18:50 > 0:18:51eating pancakes and talking to

0:18:51 > 0:18:55a lot of lumpy housewives at shopping malls.

0:18:55 > 0:18:58The campaigning itself is a pretty good test of the candidate.

0:18:58 > 0:19:01If they manage to get through that without flopping dead

0:19:01 > 0:19:04on the floor or turning into a bodacious drunk, you know...

0:19:06 > 0:19:08I mean, I sure couldn't.

0:19:08 > 0:19:13Just the sheer wear and tear on these people tells us that

0:19:13 > 0:19:15they're pretty sturdy physical specimens.

0:19:15 > 0:19:21No-one who hasn't been there has any conception

0:19:21 > 0:19:26of how unbelievably gruelling it is.

0:19:26 > 0:19:29It's gruelling and exhausting.

0:19:30 > 0:19:33Remember, you've been campaigning - what? -

0:19:33 > 0:19:35by the time you hit September, for 16 months.

0:19:35 > 0:19:39Jumping into a plane in the morning and making four or five speeches

0:19:39 > 0:19:41in different parts of the country,

0:19:41 > 0:19:43which aren't that different from the ones you made the day before,

0:19:43 > 0:19:48is not the most, er, wonderful experience, in that sense.

0:19:48 > 0:19:51I want to thank the musical organisations that have been here.

0:19:51 > 0:19:53I understand we have the Leon High School band

0:19:53 > 0:19:56- and the Godby High School band. - CHEERING

0:19:56 > 0:19:59President Truman continues his swing around the circuit,

0:19:59 > 0:20:02meeting former vice president Garner at Uvalde, Texas.

0:20:02 > 0:20:05Campaigning for president is more than a full-time job.

0:20:05 > 0:20:08I mean, just raising the money is a full-time job,

0:20:08 > 0:20:12not to mention going out and actually glad-handing people,

0:20:12 > 0:20:14which is maybe two full-time jobs.

0:20:14 > 0:20:17I really don't know how they survive doing it, cos it is -

0:20:17 > 0:20:20it's just brutal. Especially this year.

0:20:20 > 0:20:23I mean, this is a gruelling field.

0:20:23 > 0:20:25People have lasted much longer than anyone expected.

0:20:25 > 0:20:29Super PACS have played a role in keeping candidates going.

0:20:29 > 0:20:32The next leader of the free world is going to have to tell us,

0:20:32 > 0:20:33right up front...

0:20:33 > 0:20:36are you going for the Broncos or for the Patriots?

0:20:36 > 0:20:38LAUGHTER

0:20:38 > 0:20:40And I'm here to announce...

0:20:40 > 0:20:41This guy just paid off his student loan!

0:20:41 > 0:20:44He looks like the kind of guy that should be explaining you

0:20:44 > 0:20:46your warranty when you buy a large appliance.

0:20:48 > 0:20:52After seven years of Barack Obama, this is a time of urgency.

0:20:52 > 0:20:55You start to hear the same things over and over again,

0:20:55 > 0:20:58said in a new way, with new reactions from the audience.

0:21:01 > 0:21:05Jeb Bush - decent governor, I suppose, of Florida.

0:21:05 > 0:21:08Which is like being a manager of a Dignitas clinic.

0:21:08 > 0:21:12But let's face it - every family needs a Fredo,

0:21:12 > 0:21:15just clinging to some blind familial destiny.

0:21:15 > 0:21:17Hey, Dad.

0:21:18 > 0:21:20Hey, W. How you doing?

0:21:23 > 0:21:26I've learned a lot, being a candidate here,

0:21:26 > 0:21:27and I look forward...

0:21:27 > 0:21:30They try to be as everyman as possible, but they're slowly

0:21:30 > 0:21:33losing their identity, turning into nattering nabobs,

0:21:33 > 0:21:34shills, ciphers, husks.

0:21:36 > 0:21:39You know, they're too busy flitting from rally to rally,

0:21:39 > 0:21:41town hall to town hall, dinner to dinner,

0:21:41 > 0:21:44trying to get people to like 'em.

0:21:44 > 0:21:46It's like an Academy Awards nominations

0:21:46 > 0:21:48if all the nominees were from the same film.

0:21:48 > 0:21:51I believe America can be greater than it's ever been.

0:21:51 > 0:21:54How we can keep America safer and stronger and freer...

0:21:54 > 0:21:58When our embassy is purposefully attacked by terrorists...

0:21:58 > 0:22:02They peddle bromides they think American voters can respond to -

0:22:02 > 0:22:05things like, "Let's take America back."

0:22:05 > 0:22:07"Let's make America strong again."

0:22:07 > 0:22:10Basically, anything that can fit onto a bumper sticker.

0:22:10 > 0:22:12And they desperately avoid the real issues.

0:22:14 > 0:22:17And the reason a candidate avoids the real issues is because,

0:22:17 > 0:22:19basically, both sides - Democrats and Republicans -

0:22:19 > 0:22:21they're on the same page.

0:22:21 > 0:22:24Yeah, they quibble over social welfare, but they both agree -

0:22:24 > 0:22:26needs to be fixed.

0:22:26 > 0:22:28They quibble over a few-billion-dollar difference

0:22:28 > 0:22:31in defence spending but they both agree we need an army

0:22:31 > 0:22:32that can kick the world's butt.

0:22:32 > 0:22:35They argue over the free market but they both want the Government

0:22:35 > 0:22:37to keep their big, meaty paws off of it.

0:22:37 > 0:22:40The only difference is that Democrats stay above the waist

0:22:40 > 0:22:42and Republicans, for some ungodly reason,

0:22:42 > 0:22:46are obsessed with what Americans do with their fundament.

0:22:46 > 0:22:49Abortion, Planned Parenthood, gay rights.

0:22:49 > 0:22:52Republicans cannot stay out of a woman's jinkety-jankety.

0:22:52 > 0:22:55Other than that, there's no difference.

0:22:55 > 0:22:58Republicans, Democrats - it's the difference between hair and fur.

0:22:58 > 0:23:01- Could I have a Coke, please? - I'm sorry, we only have Pepsi.

0:23:01 > 0:23:02Whatever.

0:23:03 > 0:23:05Everybody wants the same thing.

0:23:05 > 0:23:07Everybody wants economic growth, first and foremost.

0:23:07 > 0:23:13Everybody wants a balanced budget, a secure international scene,

0:23:13 > 0:23:15but we just have these two broad tendencies

0:23:15 > 0:23:17with a lot of Venn-diagram overlap.

0:23:17 > 0:23:23At times like now, when the parties seem to be very polarised,

0:23:23 > 0:23:27that Venn diagram is only overlapping by about 50%.

0:23:27 > 0:23:30Normally it overlaps by about 80%.

0:23:30 > 0:23:32- In terms of what they...- Of what...

0:23:32 > 0:23:33- What they want to achieve?- Exactly.

0:23:33 > 0:23:36I am running for the presidency of the United States

0:23:36 > 0:23:39because, citizens, it is time.

0:23:39 > 0:23:41It is time that we take our future back...

0:23:43 > 0:23:47So how do these people get themselves to stand above the fray?

0:23:47 > 0:23:50They build a team, a human shield made entirely of yes men.

0:23:52 > 0:23:54They've surrounded themselves with people who keep them

0:23:54 > 0:23:56sheltered from the real world and give them

0:23:56 > 0:24:00a courtesy reach-around hand job and keep them on a steady,

0:24:00 > 0:24:04high-octane diet of Powerade until they turn into rutting,

0:24:04 > 0:24:07savage-eyed alpha males crashing through the woods

0:24:07 > 0:24:10looking for anything with a hole in it to fuck.

0:24:10 > 0:24:12But I mean that in the nicest way possible.

0:24:12 > 0:24:18And to get to the point where you have zillions of advisers

0:24:18 > 0:24:22telling you what to do and what not to do and how to do it,

0:24:22 > 0:24:26you don't know which is telling you the truth, you're surrounded

0:24:26 > 0:24:31by ambitious people, you're raising money hand over fist...

0:24:34 > 0:24:37..it's not a lot of fun.

0:24:42 > 0:24:44# The prodigal son

0:24:44 > 0:24:47# Left home by himself

0:24:47 > 0:24:49# Home by himself

0:24:49 > 0:24:53# Oh, the prodigal son left home by himself

0:24:55 > 0:24:58# Prodigal son left home by himself

0:25:00 > 0:25:04# That's the way for me to get along... #

0:25:05 > 0:25:07People running for president uniformly believe

0:25:07 > 0:25:13they can change the world. So the idea is to win at all costs.

0:25:13 > 0:25:14After all, if you lose,

0:25:14 > 0:25:16you're not going to be able to do anything, are you?

0:25:16 > 0:25:19Winning an election is about deflecting as much as shit

0:25:19 > 0:25:21as the other guy can throw at you.

0:25:21 > 0:25:25If he claims that you fuck pigs, he's desperate.

0:25:25 > 0:25:28But if he puts you in a position of having to deny that you fuck pigs,

0:25:28 > 0:25:30YOU'RE desperate.

0:25:31 > 0:25:33It's 1988.

0:25:33 > 0:25:37After years of a B-movie Republican gunslinger running things,

0:25:37 > 0:25:39a lot of Americans are ready for a change.

0:25:41 > 0:25:44We're going to build the kind of America where hard work is rewarded,

0:25:44 > 0:25:47where American goods and American workmanship

0:25:47 > 0:25:49are the best in the world. That's what this election is all about.

0:25:49 > 0:25:53A Democratic governor from Massachusetts, Michael Dukakis,

0:25:53 > 0:25:55was primed to challenge

0:25:55 > 0:25:57the incumbent vice president, George HW Bush.

0:25:57 > 0:26:02I seek the presidency to build a better America.

0:26:02 > 0:26:04It's that simple and that big.

0:26:04 > 0:26:07I thought he was a serious candidate.

0:26:07 > 0:26:09This was clearly going to be a competitive race.

0:26:09 > 0:26:12I thought it was quite winnable.

0:26:12 > 0:26:15And if I hadn't made a couple of really bad mistakes,

0:26:15 > 0:26:16I think I could have won it.

0:26:16 > 0:26:19By working together to create opportunity and a good life...

0:26:19 > 0:26:23Dukakis was determined to take a fresh approach to campaigning

0:26:23 > 0:26:25and avoid the mudslinging and the negativity

0:26:25 > 0:26:27of so many previous elections.

0:26:27 > 0:26:28'I hadn't engaged in any of that stuff

0:26:28 > 0:26:30'during the primary, quite deliberately,'

0:26:30 > 0:26:34and I thought people were fed up of that stuff.

0:26:34 > 0:26:38But the lesson to be learned from '88 is that if the other guy's

0:26:38 > 0:26:41coming at you, you've got to have a carefully thought-out strategy.

0:26:41 > 0:26:44For a new era of new economic greatness in America,

0:26:44 > 0:26:46Michael Dukakis for president.

0:26:47 > 0:26:50Bush, on the other hand, was an old-guard politician.

0:26:50 > 0:26:53He'd been around a long time and he knew all the angles.

0:26:53 > 0:26:57And his opening gambit was to play the old crime-and-punishment card.

0:26:59 > 0:27:01As governor, Michael Dukakis vetoed

0:27:01 > 0:27:04mandatory sentences for drug dealers.

0:27:04 > 0:27:06He vetoed the death penalty.

0:27:06 > 0:27:10The Republicans seized upon a parole programme

0:27:10 > 0:27:14in the state of Massachusetts where Dukakis was governor,

0:27:14 > 0:27:19which allowed violent criminals to be released not so much on parole

0:27:19 > 0:27:23but to be released on work furloughs for a few weeks.

0:27:23 > 0:27:27William Horton escaped from the furlough programme.

0:27:27 > 0:27:30He attacked a man and his girlfriend

0:27:30 > 0:27:33and he raped the young woman and he stabbed the man.

0:27:33 > 0:27:38Republicans seized upon this as a way to attack Dukakis

0:27:38 > 0:27:39as soft on crime.

0:27:39 > 0:27:43His revolving-door prison policy gave weekend furloughs

0:27:43 > 0:27:46to first-degree murderers not eligible for parole.

0:27:46 > 0:27:50While out, many committed other crimes like kidnapping and rape,

0:27:50 > 0:27:53and many are still at large.

0:27:53 > 0:27:55Now Michael Dukakis says he wants to do for America

0:27:55 > 0:27:58what he's done for Massachusetts.

0:27:58 > 0:28:00America can't afford that risk.

0:28:00 > 0:28:02Never mind that those weren't convicts.

0:28:02 > 0:28:05Those were members of George Bush Senior's campaign staff,

0:28:05 > 0:28:08rented strangers, told not to shave for the day

0:28:08 > 0:28:10and make a video that basically says,

0:28:10 > 0:28:14"Elect Dukakis, and your kids will be kidnapped and raped."

0:28:14 > 0:28:16Yep, that happened, and we let it happen.

0:28:17 > 0:28:20Smears, cheap shots, dirty tricks

0:28:20 > 0:28:23are part and parcel of American elections.

0:28:23 > 0:28:26They're the currency of American elections.

0:28:26 > 0:28:28Ronald Reagan himself had a furlough programme.

0:28:28 > 0:28:30This governor of California had defended the programme,

0:28:30 > 0:28:33even though two of his furloughees went out and murdered people.

0:28:33 > 0:28:35But I said, "Not going to do it."

0:28:35 > 0:28:37It was a big mistake. It's a big mistake.

0:28:38 > 0:28:41And it was very likely this strategy of not fighting,

0:28:41 > 0:28:44of not slinging back mud, that cost Dukakis the race.

0:28:45 > 0:28:48See, mudslinging serves two important functions.

0:28:48 > 0:28:52Number one, how a candidate responds to it is a microcosm of

0:28:52 > 0:28:55how they would handle duress if, in fact, they were president.

0:28:55 > 0:28:58Let's face it - no sane candidate is ever going to say anything bad

0:28:58 > 0:29:01about himself, so you have to take them out of

0:29:01 > 0:29:03their "I'm a nice guy" safety zone

0:29:03 > 0:29:06and see what they'll do when the gloves come off.

0:29:08 > 0:29:11For the next 90 minutes, we will be questioning the candidates...

0:29:11 > 0:29:15It was during a televised debate on PBS that moderator Bernard Shaw

0:29:15 > 0:29:18delivered the fatal blow, while 67 million Americans watched.

0:29:18 > 0:29:22There are no restrictions on the questions that my colleagues

0:29:22 > 0:29:24and I can ask this evening.

0:29:24 > 0:29:26He went onto a stage

0:29:26 > 0:29:28with millions of people watching

0:29:28 > 0:29:29and he knew damn well,

0:29:29 > 0:29:32he did something he didn't often do.

0:29:32 > 0:29:34He made a mistake.

0:29:34 > 0:29:37The first question goes to Governor Dukakis.

0:29:37 > 0:29:39You have two minutes to respond.

0:29:39 > 0:29:44We had rehearsed, time and again, that question.

0:29:44 > 0:29:48That's the question where people want to know, whose side are you on?

0:29:48 > 0:29:50Are you on the side of the criminal

0:29:50 > 0:29:53or are you on the side of the victim?

0:29:53 > 0:29:58And we had practised the answer endlessly in debate prep.

0:29:58 > 0:30:00I mean, I can do it for you right now.

0:30:00 > 0:30:06It begins with, "I know what it's like to be the victim of crime."

0:30:06 > 0:30:11Governor, if Kitty Dukakis were raped and murdered...

0:30:12 > 0:30:17..would you favour an irrevocable death penalty for the killer?

0:30:17 > 0:30:21I really viewed this as being a kind of routine question

0:30:21 > 0:30:24and, unfortunately, I think I kind of answered it

0:30:24 > 0:30:27as if I had been asked it a thousand times.

0:30:27 > 0:30:29No, I don't, Bernard, and I think you know that

0:30:29 > 0:30:33I've opposed the death penalty during all of my life.

0:30:33 > 0:30:37I don't see any evidence that it's a deterrent and I think there are

0:30:37 > 0:30:39better and more effective ways to deal with violent crime.

0:30:39 > 0:30:41We've done so in my own state...

0:30:41 > 0:30:43When Bernard Shaw asked him the question,

0:30:43 > 0:30:45"Would you support the death penalty if your wife,

0:30:45 > 0:30:49"Kitty Dukakis, was raped and murdered?"

0:30:49 > 0:30:52and he responded in a very robotic, stilted,

0:30:52 > 0:30:55falling back on his talking points fashion,

0:30:55 > 0:30:57and Americans wanted him to shout out,

0:30:57 > 0:30:59"How dare you ask me such a personal question?"

0:31:00 > 0:31:02So, Dukakis was doomed -

0:31:02 > 0:31:06viewed as a shell, a man with no emotion toward his own wife.

0:31:06 > 0:31:09And his opponent made sure there was no coming back from this mistake.

0:31:09 > 0:31:12Here I do have, on this particular question,

0:31:12 > 0:31:15a big difference with my opponent.

0:31:15 > 0:31:21You see, I do believe that some crimes are so heinous, so brutal...

0:31:21 > 0:31:24I walk all the way backstage

0:31:24 > 0:31:27and I'm the first person to get to Michael

0:31:27 > 0:31:30and he looked at me and he said, "I'm sorry."

0:31:32 > 0:31:34"I just missed it."

0:31:40 > 0:31:43Of course I regret about that, I would have been delighted to be

0:31:43 > 0:31:45- President of the United States. - HE LAUGHS

0:31:45 > 0:31:48I mean, how many people get to be president, for heaven's sake?

0:31:48 > 0:31:51No, I'd have loved the opportunity, but I didn't get it,

0:31:51 > 0:31:55didn't win it, so...one does other things.

0:32:05 > 0:32:09Let's imagine for a second an alternative historical scenario.

0:32:09 > 0:32:11What if Dukakis, instead of answering robotically,

0:32:11 > 0:32:14had actually said to Bernard Shaw, "I'm sorry, Bernard,

0:32:14 > 0:32:18"did you just ask me, 'what if my wife was raped'?

0:32:18 > 0:32:21"How about we step outside and I punch your lights out?"

0:32:21 > 0:32:24Then he would have been a national hero, easily beating George HW Bush.

0:32:24 > 0:32:26No George HW Bush,

0:32:26 > 0:32:30no George Bush Jr 12 years later to follow in his footsteps.

0:32:30 > 0:32:33George Bush Jr would still have been owner of the Texas Rangers

0:32:33 > 0:32:36baseball team, which he would have run into the ground, so now

0:32:36 > 0:32:40Texas fans switch their allegiance to the Dallas Mavericks of the NBA.

0:32:40 > 0:32:43The Mavericks have a huge payroll and are able to hold on to

0:32:43 > 0:32:45both Kris Humphries and Lamar Odom,

0:32:45 > 0:32:47instead of trading them to the LA Clippers,

0:32:47 > 0:32:50where they promptly go off and marry Kardashians,

0:32:50 > 0:32:54thus perpetuating the tawdry freak-show nature of reality TV.

0:32:54 > 0:32:57The Kardashians would just be three inconsequential,

0:32:57 > 0:33:00vapid bimbos hanging out at the mall.

0:33:16 > 0:33:19So, you're probably thinking, the Founding Fathers,

0:33:19 > 0:33:20those who created democracy in America,

0:33:20 > 0:33:23were upstanding and dignified men with waistcoats

0:33:23 > 0:33:25and really florid signatures,

0:33:25 > 0:33:28who would never stoop to cut-throat politics.

0:33:28 > 0:33:29Wrong.

0:33:32 > 0:33:36This is the Constitution of the United States. 4,543 words...

0:33:36 > 0:33:39that explain how the government works.

0:33:39 > 0:33:45This is an owners' manual for a 2014 Toyota Tundra pick-up truck.

0:33:46 > 0:33:48The people who wrote the Constitution

0:33:48 > 0:33:50had no idea if it was going to work.

0:33:50 > 0:33:54All they knew was there had to be a better way to elect a leader.

0:33:54 > 0:33:55Because up to this point, historically,

0:33:55 > 0:33:58there were only two ways to acquire power.

0:33:58 > 0:34:03One, you overran people with invading hordes. Very messy.

0:34:03 > 0:34:05Or two, you had to find a way to successfully

0:34:05 > 0:34:08be born into a royal family.

0:34:08 > 0:34:12The Founding Fathers figured there had to be something in between.

0:34:12 > 0:34:15So they came up with this idea of a trilateral structure -

0:34:15 > 0:34:19executive, judicial, legislative - where everybody could make sure

0:34:19 > 0:34:22that everybody else wasn't getting too uppity.

0:34:24 > 0:34:29They already had the perfect choice for president - George Washington.

0:34:29 > 0:34:33A philosopher king straight out of Plato's Republic.

0:34:33 > 0:34:35A man who, other than not knowing how stupid it was to stand up

0:34:35 > 0:34:39in a crowded boat, was articulate, humble, and the nation's hero.

0:34:43 > 0:34:47So after drafting this template for democracy, the Founding Fathers

0:34:47 > 0:34:50immediately did the most undemocratic thing possible.

0:34:50 > 0:34:54They anointed Washington president, unelected and unopposed.

0:34:56 > 0:34:59Washington didn't like the office.

0:34:59 > 0:35:03And didn't approve of the existence of the office, in a way.

0:35:03 > 0:35:06Nobody really knew, nobody had done this before.

0:35:08 > 0:35:11Actually, they didn't even use the terms president

0:35:11 > 0:35:13or vice president at first. There was a lot of back and forth

0:35:13 > 0:35:15about what to actually call their leader.

0:35:15 > 0:35:18OK, here's a little game I like to play.

0:35:18 > 0:35:21Which of these were actually suggested titles

0:35:21 > 0:35:25for America's leader, and which are famous racehorses?

0:35:25 > 0:35:27Pencils ready.

0:35:27 > 0:35:29Elective Majesty.

0:35:29 > 0:35:31Phar Lap.

0:35:31 > 0:35:33Bold Ruler.

0:35:33 > 0:35:35His Serene Highness.

0:35:35 > 0:35:38War Admiral.

0:35:38 > 0:35:40His Rotundity.

0:35:40 > 0:35:43Superfluous Excellency.

0:35:43 > 0:35:45Seabiscuit.

0:35:45 > 0:35:46Answers later.

0:35:50 > 0:35:51Within his first four years,

0:35:51 > 0:35:54Washington exposed a huge flaw in the Constitution,

0:35:54 > 0:35:57something the Founding Fathers and all their idealistic vision

0:35:57 > 0:36:01had never foreseen, which was that as soon as you're in charge,

0:36:01 > 0:36:05somebody, somewhere is going to decide you're doing it all wrong.

0:36:05 > 0:36:10The Founding Fathers never envisaged the two-party system.

0:36:10 > 0:36:13Today, we understand the two-party system

0:36:13 > 0:36:16as essential for the functioning of democracy.

0:36:16 > 0:36:18They didn't really foresee that

0:36:18 > 0:36:22there are differences in self-interest - they thought

0:36:22 > 0:36:28people would put these aside and unite for the good of the country.

0:36:30 > 0:36:33Almost immediately, two of the main architects of the Constitution

0:36:33 > 0:36:35started sniping at each other -

0:36:35 > 0:36:38Thomas Jefferson, the first Secretary of State,

0:36:38 > 0:36:42and Alexander Hamilton, the first Secretary of the Treasury.

0:36:44 > 0:36:48Jefferson was a plantation owner, Republic-minded.

0:36:48 > 0:36:50In other words, sympathetic to farmers and planters.

0:36:50 > 0:36:53He felt government should interfere as little as possible

0:36:53 > 0:36:57in people's lives. And by people, of course, I mean white folks.

0:36:57 > 0:37:00It's become fashionable in the last decade or so

0:37:00 > 0:37:03to bad-mouth Jefferson and question whether

0:37:03 > 0:37:06he deserves that great big photobomb up on Mount Rushmore.

0:37:06 > 0:37:09Because, you know, he owned slaves.

0:37:09 > 0:37:10Yeah, he did.

0:37:10 > 0:37:12So did the first five presidents.

0:37:12 > 0:37:15So you want to blame the driver, or the guy who handed him the keys?

0:37:15 > 0:37:18That would be you, Britain.

0:37:18 > 0:37:21Jefferson once called slavery a great stain on the nation.

0:37:21 > 0:37:25Now, as a duplicity of the times, you could call slavery a stain,

0:37:25 > 0:37:28and then you could have the slaves remove the stain.

0:37:34 > 0:37:37And as for any disparaging remarks about Sally Hemmings,

0:37:37 > 0:37:38Jefferson's slave mistress,

0:37:38 > 0:37:43bear in mind that Jefferson's wife died at the age of 33

0:37:43 > 0:37:47and on her deathbed, Jefferson promised he would never marry again.

0:37:47 > 0:37:50So what can you do? You're the president and you can't get laid?

0:37:50 > 0:37:51You have to file that under,

0:37:51 > 0:37:54"Lamentable, but what choice do you have?"

0:37:54 > 0:37:57Kind of like programming on ITV on a Sunday night.

0:38:03 > 0:38:06Hamilton had an altogether different worldview than Jefferson.

0:38:06 > 0:38:08He was what you would call a federalist.

0:38:08 > 0:38:09He believed in big government,

0:38:09 > 0:38:12and that if a big government didn't get its act together

0:38:12 > 0:38:15and start making some do-re-mi, shore up a federal bank and print

0:38:15 > 0:38:19a unified currency, then America was going to go down the dumper fast.

0:38:21 > 0:38:24He admired the English financial system,

0:38:24 > 0:38:28he admired the banking system, especially in England,

0:38:28 > 0:38:32and he wanted to replicate those for America.

0:38:32 > 0:38:36Because of their polarised views on how the country should be run,

0:38:36 > 0:38:40Jefferson and Hamilton's animosity towards each other escalated.

0:38:40 > 0:38:46Jefferson and Hamilton used newspapers very unethically.

0:38:46 > 0:38:50Both of them were members of Washington's cabinet,

0:38:50 > 0:38:55yet both of them took government money and funded newspapers,

0:38:55 > 0:39:00the point of which was to express opinions for their side.

0:39:02 > 0:39:06They would plant articles in newspapers,

0:39:06 > 0:39:08often writing under pseudonyms.

0:39:08 > 0:39:13In a 1776 issue of Hamilton's paper,

0:39:13 > 0:39:16he, under the name Phocion,

0:39:16 > 0:39:19talked about the "pretensions of Thomas Jefferson

0:39:19 > 0:39:22"to the presidency", the nation must "be on The Guard".

0:39:22 > 0:39:27He was "a demagogue", he wore the, quote, "garb of patriotism,

0:39:27 > 0:39:29"but only as a disguise."

0:39:29 > 0:39:32According to Jefferson, writing in his own paper,

0:39:32 > 0:39:37Hamilton's ideas were "stupid, suspicious and licentious",

0:39:37 > 0:39:41and they would just go back and forth, back and forth.

0:39:43 > 0:39:45In essence, Hamilton and Jefferson's differences

0:39:45 > 0:39:48derived from the ambiguity of the Constitution,

0:39:48 > 0:39:51because the thing about the Constitution is,

0:39:51 > 0:39:52it's purposively vague.

0:39:52 > 0:39:57That's why we've spent 230 years arguing over what it means.

0:39:57 > 0:39:59For example, when it comes to describing the president's

0:39:59 > 0:40:02actual duties, this is what it says.

0:40:02 > 0:40:05"The president shall take care that the laws of the United States

0:40:05 > 0:40:07"are duly and faithfully executed."

0:40:08 > 0:40:11"Take care." That's it?!

0:40:11 > 0:40:13The label on my shirt tells me how to take care

0:40:13 > 0:40:15in four different languages.

0:40:15 > 0:40:19But the Constitution just says, "Hey, you know, watch out."

0:40:20 > 0:40:23You can imagine that opened itself up to a lot of interpretation.

0:40:23 > 0:40:26Basically, Hamilton and Jefferson disagreed on how much power

0:40:26 > 0:40:30the president should have, because Hamilton was a pragmatist,

0:40:30 > 0:40:32and Jefferson was an ideologue.

0:40:34 > 0:40:36Hamilton knew he could get way more done

0:40:36 > 0:40:38by being a behind-the-scenes guy,

0:40:38 > 0:40:41which is what he did for the next four presidencies.

0:40:41 > 0:40:44He was the facilitator, the go-to guy.

0:40:44 > 0:40:47He's on the 10 bill because he started the Federal Reserve Bank.

0:40:47 > 0:40:50He moved the capital from Philadelphia to Washington DC

0:40:50 > 0:40:53because he believed it should be in a neutral place.

0:41:00 > 0:41:02By the 1800 election between Thomas Jefferson

0:41:02 > 0:41:04and the watery-faced John Quincy Adams,

0:41:04 > 0:41:07the two-party system was firmly entrenched.

0:41:07 > 0:41:09And now things got really nasty -

0:41:09 > 0:41:13in the most gentlemanly way possible, of course, through print.

0:41:13 > 0:41:17Part of us, as Americans, have a Mr Smith Goes To Washington movie

0:41:17 > 0:41:20in the back of our minds. Some shining city on a hill,

0:41:20 > 0:41:24back in that idealised past, where people were good to each other

0:41:24 > 0:41:27and the Founding Fathers would never play dirty tricks on each other.

0:41:27 > 0:41:29Well, of course, that's ridiculous,

0:41:29 > 0:41:32because even if you go back to the election of 1800,

0:41:32 > 0:41:36where Thomas Jefferson hires a writer to call John Adams, quote,

0:41:36 > 0:41:39"a hideous hermaphrodite", unquote,

0:41:39 > 0:41:43and the Federalist John Adams attacked Thomas Jefferson

0:41:43 > 0:41:46as being "soft on the French Revolution",

0:41:46 > 0:41:49just as Michael Dukakis was soft on crime.

0:41:52 > 0:41:55And that election included my favourite campaign trick,

0:41:55 > 0:41:58where the Federalists spread the rumour

0:41:58 > 0:42:00that Thomas Jefferson was dead.

0:42:00 > 0:42:01Which I think is wonderful!

0:42:01 > 0:42:05Because, really, in those days, how do you rebut that very quickly?

0:42:05 > 0:42:08Well, you can't vote for him, you know, he's dead!

0:42:12 > 0:42:14So, you think the modern-day media

0:42:14 > 0:42:16is a cesspool of slime and misinformation?

0:42:16 > 0:42:19Look back to the good old days when you could just

0:42:19 > 0:42:23pay a journalist to accuse your opponent of being insane

0:42:23 > 0:42:26or a sexual deviant or an atheist. Just took a little money.

0:42:28 > 0:42:30Jefferson won the 1800 election,

0:42:30 > 0:42:32became the third president of America.

0:42:32 > 0:42:35As for Hamilton... Well, he was never going to be able to

0:42:35 > 0:42:37run for president because he was born in the Caribbean.

0:42:37 > 0:42:40He continued his career as a great facilitator,

0:42:40 > 0:42:43then ended up being killed in a duel with a guy named Aaron Burr.

0:42:43 > 0:42:44GUNSHOT

0:42:44 > 0:42:47Today, his achievements have been commemorated

0:42:47 > 0:42:51in a Broadway musical, soon to transfer to the West End.

0:42:51 > 0:42:53Hamilton, the musical!

0:42:53 > 0:42:56# It's time to take a shot Time to take a shot

0:42:56 > 0:42:59- # I am not throwing away my shot - Just you wait

0:42:59 > 0:43:01- # I am not throwing away my shot - Just you wait

0:43:01 > 0:43:04- # I am Alexander Hamilton - Hamilton

0:43:04 > 0:43:06# Just you wait

0:43:06 > 0:43:09# I am not throwing away my shot! #

0:43:12 > 0:43:16So there you go - one of America's most influential Founding Fathers

0:43:16 > 0:43:18is now a hip-hop musical.

0:43:18 > 0:43:21Because nothing inspires wicked beats

0:43:21 > 0:43:23like an 18th-century Federalist.

0:43:23 > 0:43:26See if I can't find one of these all-instrumental rap stations.

0:43:26 > 0:43:29Bet it goes something like this.

0:43:29 > 0:43:30HEAVY BEAT

0:43:30 > 0:43:33# Alexander Hamilton was the bomb

0:43:33 > 0:43:36# Born in the West Indies and orphaned from his mom

0:43:36 > 0:43:40# Where he witnessed first-hand the degradation of slavery

0:43:40 > 0:43:43# And was promoted by George Washington for his bravery

0:43:43 > 0:43:46# He founded the bank of the Federal Reserve,

0:43:46 > 0:43:49# But Tho.Jeff got on his nerve

0:43:49 > 0:43:52# Tho.Jeff, he said, the economy needs to be saved

0:43:52 > 0:43:55# But he, Jefferson, was too busy banging his slave

0:43:55 > 0:43:57# To listen

0:43:57 > 0:44:00# And that is the paradox of the two-party system

0:44:00 > 0:44:04# Because Alexander Hamilton ain't bullshit. #

0:44:07 > 0:44:09Boo-yah!

0:44:09 > 0:44:13I do this shot all day, man. Give me any politician, I'll rap him.

0:44:13 > 0:44:15I'll rap a politician.

0:44:15 > 0:44:17- 'Trump!'- Trump?

0:44:17 > 0:44:21# Donald Trump's mom was born in Stornoway

0:44:21 > 0:44:22# At a very early age

0:44:22 > 0:44:25# All the hair on Donald's head had worn away

0:44:25 > 0:44:28# If you elect him president, beware

0:44:28 > 0:44:30# How can a man control a country

0:44:30 > 0:44:35# When he can't even control his hair? #

0:44:35 > 0:44:36HE LAUGHS

0:44:41 > 0:44:45So, the 1800s arrived and we get a steady succession of presidents.

0:44:45 > 0:44:47Some forgettable, some will eventually

0:44:47 > 0:44:51have a three-day mattress sale named after them.

0:44:51 > 0:44:56And in 18w5, you get John Quincy Adams, the first true dud.

0:44:56 > 0:44:58The only son of a former president

0:44:58 > 0:45:01who ended up being a worse president than his dad.

0:45:01 > 0:45:04That's right, John Quincy Adams purposively underperformed

0:45:04 > 0:45:07in the White House to ensure that future sons of presidents

0:45:07 > 0:45:10would learn from his mistake and never attempt to repeat it.

0:45:11 > 0:45:15And how did these early POTUS-es, POTI,

0:45:15 > 0:45:17engage with the public?

0:45:17 > 0:45:20They didn't. Not remotely.

0:45:20 > 0:45:23No, they stayed holed up in DC amongst their peers

0:45:23 > 0:45:28just pontificating and extemporising and writing lots of doctrines.

0:45:28 > 0:45:31A doctrine, by the way, is a word that the more you say it,

0:45:31 > 0:45:33the stupider it starts to sound.

0:45:33 > 0:45:36Smaller than a writ, but bigger than a pamphlet.

0:45:36 > 0:45:40But none of these guys would be caught dead fraternising with

0:45:40 > 0:45:44the average guy from Main Street, USA. Why would you?

0:45:44 > 0:45:47Imagine how much more you can get done if you don't have to

0:45:47 > 0:45:51deal with those pesky citizens and all their rights and demands.

0:45:51 > 0:45:54# Come on, baby Let the good times roll... #

0:45:54 > 0:45:56The candidate who more or less

0:45:56 > 0:46:01invented campaigning as we know it today was Andrew Jackson.

0:46:01 > 0:46:03He realised that to win the election of 1828,

0:46:03 > 0:46:05he was going to have to work the crowd,

0:46:05 > 0:46:08meet the public, kiss some babies.

0:46:08 > 0:46:12He began to do something that no milk-tit gilded-cage candidate

0:46:12 > 0:46:15had done before. He stumped.

0:46:15 > 0:46:18What is stumping? Just what it implies.

0:46:18 > 0:46:20Get yourself a stump, arm yourself

0:46:20 > 0:46:22with a few all-encompassing phrases,

0:46:22 > 0:46:26crowd-pleasers like, "This is the best potato salad I've ever tasted.

0:46:26 > 0:46:29"Can I count on your vote in November?"

0:46:29 > 0:46:30And then get to stumping.

0:46:35 > 0:46:36Fellow Americans,

0:46:36 > 0:46:40thank you very much for inviting me to your wonderful state

0:46:40 > 0:46:44here in the heartland of America, but also very near the coast.

0:46:44 > 0:46:48I realise I am probably standing on sacred Indian burial ground

0:46:48 > 0:46:52and I will fulfil my promise to remove those bodies

0:46:52 > 0:46:58and relocate them, so we can put an all-important manicure parlour here,

0:46:58 > 0:47:03and that means jobs, jobs, jobs.

0:47:03 > 0:47:04Thank you.

0:47:07 > 0:47:08Thank you.

0:47:12 > 0:47:17Andrew Jackson's campaign depended on the persuasive power of personality.

0:47:17 > 0:47:20Until Jackson, politics in America was an institution.

0:47:20 > 0:47:25He turned it into a happening, and here's why. The man was a badass.

0:47:25 > 0:47:27How much of a badass?

0:47:27 > 0:47:29All right, let's take all 43 presidents,

0:47:29 > 0:47:30put them into a steel cage,

0:47:30 > 0:47:33no-one comes out alive - battle royal.

0:47:33 > 0:47:35You have to honour and defend the Constitution.

0:47:35 > 0:47:38No Apache helicopters allowed. Who wins?

0:47:40 > 0:47:43The smart money would be on ex-soldiers,

0:47:43 > 0:47:44like Rutherford B Hayes,

0:47:44 > 0:47:48who took five bullets, making him the 50 Cent of presidents,

0:47:48 > 0:47:49but does that make him a tough guy

0:47:49 > 0:47:51or just someone who survived a bad shot?

0:47:53 > 0:47:56Eisenhower had guts - he beat the Nazis.

0:47:56 > 0:47:59But by the White House years, those guts were inflamed

0:47:59 > 0:48:02and falling out from gastroenteritis.

0:48:02 > 0:48:05Put a 20 on Andrew Jackson and while you're at it,

0:48:05 > 0:48:07put Andrew Jackson on a 20.

0:48:07 > 0:48:09# We fired our guns and the British came a-comin'... #

0:48:09 > 0:48:11He killed Indians.

0:48:11 > 0:48:13He whomped the British in New Orleans,

0:48:13 > 0:48:16kicked the Seminoles back to Florida and as a duellist,

0:48:16 > 0:48:19once plugged a guy named Charles Dickinson.

0:48:19 > 0:48:21By the time he decided to run for Prez,

0:48:21 > 0:48:23his temper and passion were legendary

0:48:23 > 0:48:26and he kicked the crap out of anybody who called his wife a ho,

0:48:26 > 0:48:28which many people did.

0:48:28 > 0:48:31In September of 1827, having made up his mind

0:48:31 > 0:48:35he was going to be president, bar nothing, Jackson started

0:48:35 > 0:48:38organising "Friends of Jackson" rallies throughout the country.

0:48:38 > 0:48:42His supporters nicknamed him "Old Hickory".

0:48:43 > 0:48:46They called themselves "hurrah boys", wrote songs,

0:48:46 > 0:48:48printed pamphlets, planted hickory trees,

0:48:48 > 0:48:52passed out hickory brooms, hickory sticks, hickory canes -

0:48:52 > 0:48:56the man literally won an election through a concerted arboreal effort.

0:48:56 > 0:49:00They ripped his opponent, the incumbent John Quincy Adams, to shreds.

0:49:00 > 0:49:04The Adams camp responded by pointing out that Jackson couldn't

0:49:04 > 0:49:08even spell the word "Europe", which sadly was true.

0:49:08 > 0:49:10On voting day, they showed up in droves

0:49:10 > 0:49:12and elected Jackson by sizeable margin.

0:49:14 > 0:49:18Jackson took office in March 1829.

0:49:18 > 0:49:21Massive crowds lined the streets of Washington to celebrate.

0:49:21 > 0:49:25Eventually, they surged into the White House, wiped their feet on the rug, smashed the furniture,

0:49:25 > 0:49:28cleared out the liquor cabinet, started punching each other.

0:49:28 > 0:49:31On his first night in office, Jackson slipped out the back door,

0:49:31 > 0:49:33went and found a room at a local inn.

0:49:34 > 0:49:38Now that he had won the first presidential popularity contest,

0:49:38 > 0:49:39Jackson invented a new party -

0:49:39 > 0:49:44the Democratic Republicans, nowadays called Democrats.

0:49:44 > 0:49:47Almost immediately after his inauguration,

0:49:47 > 0:49:51Jackson's wife got fed up with being called every name in the book, and died.

0:49:51 > 0:49:53So now Jackson is even angrier.

0:49:53 > 0:49:56As soon as he's cleaned up all the broken furniture in the White House,

0:49:56 > 0:50:00he set about trying to destroy the careers of all the people who

0:50:00 > 0:50:01had opposed him.

0:50:01 > 0:50:05And fighting the Federal Reserve Bank,

0:50:05 > 0:50:07because Jackson hated paper money.

0:50:07 > 0:50:10He was a backwoods guy, believed in gold and silver.

0:50:10 > 0:50:13Spent eight years fighting the Federal Reserve because

0:50:13 > 0:50:16he believed that bankers were supreme sleazeballs.

0:50:16 > 0:50:20And then when he dies, they put his face on a 20 bill -

0:50:20 > 0:50:25quite possibly the biggest posthumous fuck-you a president has ever received.

0:50:25 > 0:50:29Also as a footnote, he was the first president to ever be shot at.

0:50:29 > 0:50:32He was leaving a funeral at the age of 67,

0:50:32 > 0:50:35and some twisted geek took two shots at him, missed both times.

0:50:35 > 0:50:39Jackson proudly responded by beating the living snot out of him

0:50:39 > 0:50:42with his hickory came. They don't make 'em like that any more!

0:50:47 > 0:50:50In spite of his contrariness, or possibly because of it,

0:50:50 > 0:50:55Jackson was assailed by the media of the time, mercilessly lampooned.

0:50:56 > 0:50:59You lie down with dogs, you wake up with fleas.

0:50:59 > 0:51:01Because he courted public acceptance,

0:51:01 > 0:51:03he had to accept public derision.

0:51:08 > 0:51:14Thomas Nast was the most famous of a new breed of journalists,

0:51:14 > 0:51:20who didn't use words as much as he used pictures.

0:51:20 > 0:51:23He was a political cartoonist with captions.

0:51:23 > 0:51:26See, back then, a political cartoon served a purpose.

0:51:26 > 0:51:28A lot of Americans were pig-illiterate but they could

0:51:28 > 0:51:31look at a cartoon and glean a lot of information.

0:51:33 > 0:51:37Nast was so skilful at lampooning that just one of his illustrations

0:51:37 > 0:51:39could destroy a politician's career.

0:51:43 > 0:51:47But nowadays I think we can all agree that the ability to draw

0:51:47 > 0:51:50big ears and bulbous features on a politician

0:51:50 > 0:51:52doesn't pack the punch it used to.

0:51:52 > 0:51:58Astoundingly, today there are still over 200 political cartoonists in America.

0:51:58 > 0:52:03200 people who have to wake up every day, think of the lamest premise

0:52:03 > 0:52:06possible, sketch it, rethink it,

0:52:06 > 0:52:11re-sketch it, colour it in, deliver it to the editor

0:52:11 > 0:52:14so that we can look at it in the paper and do this.

0:52:18 > 0:52:19Seriously.

0:52:19 > 0:52:22Have you ever overheard anyone say, "Hey,

0:52:22 > 0:52:26"did you see that political cartoon in the paper today?

0:52:26 > 0:52:30"God, David Cameron had a head like a condom!"

0:52:30 > 0:52:31Ha! Woo!

0:52:31 > 0:52:35Seriously. You're a political cartoonist, do yourself a favour.

0:52:35 > 0:52:37Go down to Leicester Square, get yourself a stall,

0:52:37 > 0:52:39surround yourself by pictures of dead rock stars

0:52:39 > 0:52:43like Kurt Cobain and Jim Morrison and make a living hoodwinking tourists

0:52:43 > 0:52:48by drawing their giant engorged heads onto little tiny bodies.

0:52:48 > 0:52:49You'd be better off.

0:52:49 > 0:52:51Hack!

0:53:02 > 0:53:04By the middle of the 1800s,

0:53:04 > 0:53:07Americans were finally involved in the election of their president.

0:53:07 > 0:53:10Andrew Jackson had changed voting forever.

0:53:10 > 0:53:14From now on, if you wanted to be president, you had to bid for the vote of the masses.

0:53:14 > 0:53:17And that of course meant spin, spin, spin.

0:53:17 > 0:53:20Media spin. You think that's a modern phenomenon?

0:53:20 > 0:53:24William Henry Harrison, born into a wealthy family,

0:53:24 > 0:53:26father was Governor of Virginia,

0:53:26 > 0:53:29he was educated at Hampton Sydney College.

0:53:29 > 0:53:33He was 5'8" of pure unadulterated toffee.

0:53:33 > 0:53:38In the election of 1840, Harrison and his party, the Whigs,

0:53:38 > 0:53:42took an offhanded comment by a Baltimore newspaper that said,

0:53:42 > 0:53:45"Harrison looks like someone that if you..."

0:53:52 > 0:53:55His party supporters picked up on that hard cider and log cabin reference

0:53:55 > 0:53:57and gave it the full spin.

0:53:57 > 0:53:58# Look at me

0:53:59 > 0:54:01# You know what you see?

0:54:01 > 0:54:03# You see a bad mother... #

0:54:03 > 0:54:07All of a sudden, a guy who owned a 200 acre farm with slaves

0:54:07 > 0:54:12was transformed into a hard drinking, big stinking backwoods philosopher.

0:54:12 > 0:54:18The Whig party organised rallies for Harrison that could only be measured in terms of acreage.

0:54:18 > 0:54:19The parades were 10 miles long.

0:54:19 > 0:54:23What hickory had done for Jackson, log cabins did for Harrison.

0:54:25 > 0:54:28Harrison won the election over Martin Van Buren,

0:54:28 > 0:54:29and then because he had to keep up

0:54:29 > 0:54:31this outdoorsman persona,

0:54:31 > 0:54:34he delivered his inaugural speech in his shirt sleeves...

0:54:34 > 0:54:36in January...

0:54:36 > 0:54:39in the snow...for two hours.

0:54:39 > 0:54:40And then he went off and died.

0:54:40 > 0:54:43His greatest contribution as president was to the lexicon -

0:54:43 > 0:54:48a distiller started selling William Henry Harrison commemorative whiskey bottles

0:54:48 > 0:54:50in the shape of a log cabin.

0:54:50 > 0:54:53That man's name was EC Booz.

0:55:00 > 0:55:03And so the parade of presidents rolls on,

0:55:03 > 0:55:08each campaign more vigorous than the one before. Newspapers come and go.

0:55:08 > 0:55:10By the early 20th century, thanks to the airwaves,

0:55:10 > 0:55:13everyone knows what a president sounds like.

0:55:13 > 0:55:15'You people must have faith.

0:55:15 > 0:55:20'You must not be stampeded by rumours or guesses. Let us unite...'

0:55:20 > 0:55:24In Beaver, Idaho, 1927, a man named Philo Farnsworth

0:55:24 > 0:55:28pottering around in his garage, invents something called

0:55:28 > 0:55:31the image dissector and modern television is born.

0:55:31 > 0:55:33Now, inevitably, thanks to television,

0:55:33 > 0:55:36anyone running for president comes under a new kind of scrutiny

0:55:36 > 0:55:39in living black and white.

0:55:39 > 0:55:43In 1946, 8,000 Americans owned televisions,

0:55:43 > 0:55:48and by 1948 that number had swollen to 350,000.

0:55:48 > 0:55:50That was the year of the Dewey-Truman election

0:55:50 > 0:55:54and for the first time, Americans got to see their candidates on the box.

0:55:54 > 0:55:58So both the Democrats and the Republicans chose to hold their nominating conventions

0:55:58 > 0:56:02on the East Coast, to take advantage of the time zone.

0:56:04 > 0:56:07In Philadelphia, Harry Truman went to the podium to accept the

0:56:07 > 0:56:09Democratic party nomination.

0:56:09 > 0:56:11Now Truman was an incumbent president

0:56:11 > 0:56:13but his victory was nowhere assured,

0:56:13 > 0:56:18nor was it a good sign when a lot of pre-celebratory pigeons were released,

0:56:18 > 0:56:23freaked out, started crapping on the conventioneers like something out of a Hitchcock movie.

0:56:23 > 0:56:25In fact the Republican candidate,

0:56:25 > 0:56:28Thomas E Dewey was so assured of stealing the presidency,

0:56:28 > 0:56:33that his adviser told him, "Just don't say anything stupid and you're in."

0:56:33 > 0:56:37Every poll and newscast seemed to support this.

0:56:37 > 0:56:40'We now know that Governor Dewey will carry New York State by

0:56:40 > 0:56:44'at least 50,000 votes and that he will be the next president

0:56:44 > 0:56:45'of the United States!'

0:56:45 > 0:56:47CHEERING

0:56:47 > 0:56:52And November 2nd, 1948, Harry Truman went to bed a loser...

0:56:52 > 0:56:54and woke up in the morning president.

0:56:58 > 0:57:01So radio and this newfangled TV coverage managed to convince

0:57:01 > 0:57:04many Republican voters that Dewey was a sure thing

0:57:04 > 0:57:07so they didn't even bother to turn out and vote.

0:57:07 > 0:57:10Truman squeaked back in by slightly more than two million votes.

0:57:12 > 0:57:16November 3rd, 1948 marks the one and only time in history

0:57:16 > 0:57:18that a newspaper got something wrong.

0:57:21 > 0:57:24Television has established itself as new and vital tool in future

0:57:24 > 0:57:28election campaigns, but it won't be long before the novelty wears off.

0:57:30 > 0:57:33When did television campaigning get ugly?

0:57:33 > 0:57:35Certainly not at the beginning.

0:57:35 > 0:57:39In 1952, about the only slanderous thing that Democratic frontrunner

0:57:39 > 0:57:42Adlai Stevenson could say against his opponent,

0:57:42 > 0:57:45General Dwight David Eisenhower,

0:57:45 > 0:57:49was that Eisenhower appeared to have grown to a height of 8'6".

0:57:51 > 0:57:53General, I'd like to get married

0:57:53 > 0:57:56but we couldn't live on the salary I get after taxes.

0:57:56 > 0:58:00Well, the Democrats are sinking deeper into a bottomless sea of debt

0:58:00 > 0:58:03and demanding more taxes to keep their confused heads above water.

0:58:03 > 0:58:06Stevenson supporters fought back teeth and nail with

0:58:06 > 0:58:09a series of devastating show tunes.

0:58:09 > 0:58:12# I'd rather have a man who knows what to do

0:58:12 > 0:58:15# When he gets to be the Prez

0:58:15 > 0:58:20# I love the gov, the governor of Illinois... #

0:58:20 > 0:58:23Unlike the governor of Illinois, Eisenhower had

0:58:23 > 0:58:25no real political experience.

0:58:25 > 0:58:28He was, by his own admission, a lifelong professional soldier,

0:58:28 > 0:58:32he'd been dragged into the race on a tide of national hero worship.

0:58:32 > 0:58:36- NEWSREEL:- He returned home and his own people took him to their hearts.

0:58:37 > 0:58:41Stevenson was an egghead, the thinking fellow's candidate,

0:58:41 > 0:58:44and thus hopelessly unsuited for the presidency.

0:58:44 > 0:58:45In fact he was quoted as saying,

0:58:45 > 0:58:47"I have no ambition to be president,

0:58:47 > 0:58:52"I have no desire for the office, mentally, temperamentally or physically,"

0:58:52 > 0:58:55and then promised to shoot himself if he were nominated.

0:58:55 > 0:58:57The Democrats nominated him anyway.

0:58:57 > 0:59:01Both candidates were what you would call nice guys - who needs that?

0:59:01 > 0:59:03Hey, if nice guys were electable,

0:59:03 > 0:59:07Adam Hills would be a president somewhere.

0:59:07 > 0:59:10Turns out TV wants to see the dark underbelly,

0:59:10 > 0:59:13the savage heart, the snake in the woodpile.

0:59:13 > 0:59:17Fortunately in 1952, such a snake reared its head.

0:59:19 > 0:59:22My fellow Americans, I come before you tonight

0:59:22 > 0:59:26as a candidate for the vice-presidency.

0:59:26 > 0:59:32And as a man whose honesty and integrity has been questioned.

0:59:32 > 0:59:36For Nixon, exposure on television was both beneficial and deceptive.

0:59:37 > 0:59:40'We are looking for those moments where you see the real person.'

0:59:40 > 0:59:42When you look at that person, do you trust them,

0:59:42 > 0:59:46do you feel like they keep it real or do you feel like,

0:59:46 > 0:59:49"Hmm? I don't really know what this person believes."

0:59:49 > 0:59:53Just because you tell us you think something or you feel something,

0:59:53 > 0:59:56are we inspired by you, do we know what you believe?

0:59:56 > 0:59:58I want to say this to the television audience.

0:59:58 > 1:00:02I've made my mistakes, but in all of my years of public life...

1:00:02 > 1:00:06Nixon verbally had lots of what we call deceptive hotspots in my world,

1:00:06 > 1:00:08but then he had the body language hotspots.

1:00:08 > 1:00:12You see Nixon holding on to the lectern.

1:00:12 > 1:00:15We tell people what we are, not what we're not.

1:00:15 > 1:00:17Nixon said, "I am not a crook."

1:00:17 > 1:00:21..people have got to know whether or not their president is a crook.

1:00:21 > 1:00:22Well, I'm not a crook.

1:00:22 > 1:00:26And he's, like, "And I welcome these questions."

1:00:26 > 1:00:30And he steps back from the podium and crosses his arms.

1:00:30 > 1:00:32And he is, like, robotic.

1:00:32 > 1:00:34I've earned everything I've got.

1:00:37 > 1:00:41We lean towards people and things and ideas that we like.

1:00:41 > 1:00:45And we lean away from people and ideas and confrontation that we don't like.

1:00:45 > 1:00:48I've earned everything I've got.

1:00:52 > 1:00:54You feel it. You're like, "This guy's fake,

1:00:54 > 1:00:56"he's phoney, he's lying about something."

1:00:56 > 1:00:59But can't you also just see they're coached?

1:00:59 > 1:01:01Yeah, of course, Hillary Clinton comes out like this,

1:01:01 > 1:01:04like she's the Christ, we call this the Christ pose,

1:01:04 > 1:01:05like she's on the cross.

1:01:05 > 1:01:08And then she does the A-OK at the end of her hands,

1:01:08 > 1:01:10so she stands out, she's like, "Hello, everybody,"

1:01:10 > 1:01:13like, "I'm your saviour, I'm here to save you."

1:01:13 > 1:01:18If you want a president who will listen to you,

1:01:18 > 1:01:21work HER heart out, to make your life better...

1:01:21 > 1:01:24CHEERING

1:01:27 > 1:01:31..and together, to build a stronger, fairer, better country...

1:01:31 > 1:01:36Al Gore, one time, he was debating against George W Bush,

1:01:36 > 1:01:38they were both seen as presidential,

1:01:38 > 1:01:41both seen as likeable going into the debate. What happened,

1:01:41 > 1:01:44Al Gore speaks, it's George W's turn, he speaks,

1:01:44 > 1:01:47Al Gore stands up, walks over to George W.

1:01:47 > 1:01:51It's not only what's your philosophy and your position on issues,

1:01:51 > 1:01:53but can you get things done?

1:01:53 > 1:01:55And, like, stands over him.

1:01:55 > 1:01:58It was so disrespectful, like, intimidating him.

1:01:58 > 1:02:01And George Bush looks over at Gore, like, "How are you doing?"

1:02:01 > 1:02:03But can you get things done?

1:02:04 > 1:02:05LAUGHTER

1:02:05 > 1:02:07And I believe I can.

1:02:08 > 1:02:12It made George Bush look likeable, even more likeable,

1:02:12 > 1:02:15in control, and not going to be pushed around easily.

1:02:15 > 1:02:17So we have an incredible country.

1:02:17 > 1:02:21For people like me, Donald Trump being in the race is fun.

1:02:21 > 1:02:23Because he's showing up real.

1:02:23 > 1:02:25We don't have victories any more.

1:02:25 > 1:02:29You feel like the guy that stands up on that stand is the same guy

1:02:29 > 1:02:31that's going to talk to you at dinner.

1:02:31 > 1:02:34And if he thinks you're an asshole, he's going to say - "Dude."

1:02:34 > 1:02:36And that all you got to go on?

1:02:36 > 1:02:37That's it.

1:02:41 > 1:02:45# Sometimes I'm right and I can be wrong

1:02:45 > 1:02:49# My own beliefs are in my song... #

1:02:49 > 1:02:53Nowadays, candidates live in a world somewhere between

1:02:53 > 1:02:56character assessment and character assassination.

1:02:56 > 1:03:00JFK was likeable, Nixon was shifty, so JFK won.

1:03:00 > 1:03:03People look at you on TV, they make up their mind in a heartbeat

1:03:03 > 1:03:06deciding if you have that likeability factor.

1:03:06 > 1:03:09And by likeability, I mean, is there remotely anything

1:03:09 > 1:03:11about these wazoos that you the voters can relate to?

1:03:13 > 1:03:17So for a long while, telegenics, TVQ, as they like to call it,

1:03:17 > 1:03:21went a long way in determining who would be the next president because

1:03:21 > 1:03:25viewers could look at a candidate's debating skills, his speeches,

1:03:25 > 1:03:28his actions, and determine for themselves who was the most

1:03:28 > 1:03:31decisive, who was the most presidential.

1:03:31 > 1:03:35And the single most important factor in choosing a president,

1:03:35 > 1:03:39who is the guy you would most like to sit down and have a beer with?

1:03:39 > 1:03:42It's the most difficult personal hurdle

1:03:42 > 1:03:44that a POTUS contender can overcome.

1:03:44 > 1:03:47So who is the guy you would most want to have a beer with?

1:03:47 > 1:03:50OK, forget any of the Mount Rushmore guys,

1:03:50 > 1:03:52cos that's like drinking with a celebrity, right?

1:03:52 > 1:03:54You just want to get a selfie taken.

1:03:54 > 1:03:56CUSTOMERS SHOUT

1:03:56 > 1:03:59Andrew Jackson, mean drunk, Bill Clinton, sure,

1:03:59 > 1:04:01if you don't mind being a wingman

1:04:01 > 1:04:05while he sneaks off with some waitress to take care of business in the back of a Camaro.

1:04:05 > 1:04:11Nope. The guy you want to drink with is Harding. Warren Gamaliel Harding.

1:04:15 > 1:04:17Harding would have been the perfect drinking buddy.

1:04:17 > 1:04:20He played baseball and golf, played poker like a maniac -

1:04:20 > 1:04:23once won an entire newspaper company in a card game.

1:04:23 > 1:04:26Even when he was president, kept flitting back off to Ohio to

1:04:26 > 1:04:30sit on the porch and polish off cocktails with his small-town pals.

1:04:30 > 1:04:32And this was during Prohibition.

1:04:36 > 1:04:38Boy, did the man have stories.

1:04:38 > 1:04:41And I don't mean, "I'm kind of a big deal in the White House" stories.

1:04:41 > 1:04:43I'm talking about STORIES.

1:04:43 > 1:04:47You know, multiple terms in the Oval Office, if you get my drift.

1:04:47 > 1:04:51Warren G Harding, affectionately known as Warren G Hard-on,

1:04:51 > 1:04:54made Bill Clinton look like the guy at the prom with acne.

1:04:54 > 1:04:58Slept with his wife's best friend, slept with his best friend's wife,

1:04:58 > 1:05:01his own wife, Flo - Flo...

1:05:01 > 1:05:04was some kind of hectoring ballbuster

1:05:04 > 1:05:08who travelled with her coterie of acolytes,

1:05:08 > 1:05:12and advisers and once tried to put a seance chair

1:05:12 > 1:05:14in the White House living room.

1:05:14 > 1:05:16Isn't that the best kind of drinking buddy -

1:05:16 > 1:05:19the guy and his personal stories are so horrific that they make

1:05:19 > 1:05:22you feel better about your own pathetic life? Damn right it is.

1:05:22 > 1:05:25Warren G Harding is your man.

1:05:25 > 1:05:29So let's go order up a couple more pitchers of beer and plates of ribs

1:05:29 > 1:05:31and check out the rack on that waitress.

1:05:31 > 1:05:37# I'm a man, yes, I am and I can't help but love you so

1:05:37 > 1:05:39# No, no, no

1:05:39 > 1:05:44# But I'm a man, yes, I am and I can't help but love you so

1:05:44 > 1:05:46# Yes, I am

1:05:46 > 1:05:48# No, no, no, be it so, baby? #

1:05:48 > 1:05:52Back to the question. At what point did modern campaigning get ugly?

1:05:52 > 1:05:54I mean, really, really ugly?

1:05:54 > 1:05:561972.

1:05:56 > 1:05:58The sitting president, Richard Nixon,

1:05:58 > 1:06:02set out to destroy the Democratic primary by pitting its four

1:06:02 > 1:06:06main candidates - Hubert Humphrey, George McGovern,

1:06:06 > 1:06:10Scoop Jackson and Edmund Muskie, against each other.

1:06:10 > 1:06:11Cut-throat.

1:06:12 > 1:06:18- # Whoo!- Who can take a sunrise? - Who can take a sunrise? #

1:06:18 > 1:06:21Nixon had already spent four years in the White House doing

1:06:21 > 1:06:23a perfunctory job of running things.

1:06:23 > 1:06:27No-one could quite get a beat on his character. He just seemed shady.

1:06:27 > 1:06:30They didn't nickname him "Tricky Dick" for nothing.

1:06:30 > 1:06:34Of course, while Nixon was respected by Americans for being strong

1:06:34 > 1:06:38and tough, nobody really loved him. And he was not exactly

1:06:38 > 1:06:42a warm figure that gave off sort of popular vibes.

1:06:42 > 1:06:45So Nixon had to worry about his re-election.

1:06:45 > 1:06:50Just remember, we cannot fulfil the American dream unless each

1:06:50 > 1:06:52American has a chance to fulfil his own dream.

1:06:52 > 1:06:54That's what we believe in.

1:06:54 > 1:06:57Nixon was leaving nothing to chance.

1:06:57 > 1:07:00So first of all, he infiltrated the Democratic primaries,

1:07:00 > 1:07:03so he would get the opponent he knew he could destroy.

1:07:03 > 1:07:07They were doing all kinds of sabotaging events,

1:07:07 > 1:07:11giving false information, trying in every way to weaken the

1:07:11 > 1:07:15candidates that Nixon most feared as potential opponents.

1:07:15 > 1:07:18Donald Segretti, one of Nixon's campaign workers,

1:07:18 > 1:07:21wrote a letter on stationery belonging to Democratic nominee

1:07:21 > 1:07:24Edmund Muskie - the letter was meant to cause chaos,

1:07:24 > 1:07:30accusing Humphrey and Scoop Jackson of sexual and alcoholic misconduct.

1:07:30 > 1:07:34Some years later, Segretti would eventually admit they were lies.

1:07:34 > 1:07:37Each and every allegation in the letter was untrue

1:07:37 > 1:07:40and without any basis in fact.

1:07:41 > 1:07:47It was not my desire to have anyone believe the letter, but instead,

1:07:47 > 1:07:51it was intended to create confusion among the various candidates.

1:07:51 > 1:07:53But in 1972, Nixon's plan had worked.

1:07:53 > 1:07:57The Democrats basically started cannibalising each other

1:07:57 > 1:08:00and McGovern moved to the forefront of Democratic contenders.

1:08:00 > 1:08:05He wanted to run against George McGovern, he thought George McGovern was the most vulnerable

1:08:05 > 1:08:09potential opponent, the person he could most easily defeat.

1:08:09 > 1:08:12- NEWSREEL:- Seldom in American history have presidential candidates held

1:08:12 > 1:08:16such sharply opposing views on major issues.

1:08:16 > 1:08:19McGovern wants to end the Vietnam War immediately.

1:08:19 > 1:08:23Nixon's re-election committee had more money than they knew

1:08:23 > 1:08:27what to do with, and used it to paint McGovern as a fuzzy socialist.

1:08:27 > 1:08:28FACTORY WHISTLE BLOWS

1:08:29 > 1:08:33Senator George McGovern recently submitted a welfare bill

1:08:33 > 1:08:34to the Congress.

1:08:34 > 1:08:37According to an analysis by the Senate finance committee,

1:08:37 > 1:08:41the McGovern bill would make 47% of the people in the

1:08:41 > 1:08:43United States eligible for welfare.

1:08:43 > 1:08:49Nixon had a systematic campaign to relentlessly tag McGovern as

1:08:49 > 1:08:50a radical and an extremist.

1:08:50 > 1:08:54Tying McGovern to the Yippies - Abbie Hoffman, Jerry Rubin -

1:08:54 > 1:09:00even one anonymous piece trying to connect him to Charles Manson.

1:09:00 > 1:09:02And who's going to pay for this?

1:09:02 > 1:09:06Well, if you're not the one out of two people on welfare - you do.

1:09:07 > 1:09:10The McGovern camp responded by pointing out

1:09:10 > 1:09:14a tiny infraction by the Nixon campaign organisation, that

1:09:14 > 1:09:18they had broken into the Democratic campaign headquarters at Watergate.

1:09:18 > 1:09:22This is about credibility. This is about electronics.

1:09:22 > 1:09:26This is about bugging. This is about spying.

1:09:26 > 1:09:30Nixon stressed that McGovern would wreck the military.

1:09:32 > 1:09:37The McGovern defence plan. He would cut the Marines by one third...

1:09:39 > 1:09:40..the Air Force by one third.

1:09:40 > 1:09:43Meanwhile, McGovern could not emphasise enough...

1:09:43 > 1:09:47This is about deception. This is about the White House.

1:09:49 > 1:09:52And this is how you stop it.

1:09:52 > 1:09:53With your vote.

1:09:53 > 1:09:56Watergate. Watergate.

1:09:56 > 1:09:59No, no, I'm still here.

1:09:59 > 1:10:02I'm still here, the director has forced me

1:10:02 > 1:10:05into this lead pipe obvious joke,

1:10:05 > 1:10:09that some people broke into Watergate in 1972.

1:10:09 > 1:10:13Watergate, break-in. Hey, everybody...

1:10:13 > 1:10:15# Who can take a rainbow... #

1:10:15 > 1:10:19Despite McGovern's efforts, Nixon was still the favourite for the election.

1:10:19 > 1:10:23He shifted his presidency into turbo-drive - he visited China.

1:10:23 > 1:10:25He made deals with Russia.

1:10:25 > 1:10:28He got tougher on Vietnam while at the same time brokering

1:10:28 > 1:10:31a peace resolution, all within a few months,

1:10:31 > 1:10:33which just goes to show you how much a president can get done when

1:10:33 > 1:10:36someone is gunning for his job.

1:10:36 > 1:10:39He was a strategist, he was relentless in his thinking,

1:10:39 > 1:10:43even as he was immoral in his tactics.

1:10:43 > 1:10:44# The candyman can

1:10:44 > 1:10:45# The candyman can

1:10:45 > 1:10:46# The candyman can... #

1:10:46 > 1:10:50He even manipulated the economy, juggling stats and figures to

1:10:50 > 1:10:53make everything in America look peachy keen,

1:10:53 > 1:10:56all so he could sail into the Oval Office

1:10:56 > 1:11:01on a victorious cumulonimbus cloud made entirely of ticker tape.

1:11:01 > 1:11:03Sorry, that last description really got out of hand.

1:11:08 > 1:11:11It's hard to believe in this modern age of what they call transparency,

1:11:11 > 1:11:15that voters would choose to ignore the fact that a sitting president

1:11:15 > 1:11:18had orchestrated a burglary of his opponents' campaign headquarters, but they did!

1:11:18 > 1:11:22And they sat back and watched McGovern slowly defeat himself.

1:11:22 > 1:11:27He chose as his running mate Thomas Eagleton, a senator from Missouri.

1:11:29 > 1:11:33Somehow, revelations hit the newspaper about Thomas Eagleton.

1:11:33 > 1:11:37It was reported that he had undergone electro-shock therapy for clinical depression.

1:11:37 > 1:11:40And questions began to arise about his ability to function as

1:11:40 > 1:11:42McGovern's second-in-command.

1:11:42 > 1:11:45Well, McGovern said he was 1,000% behind Eagleton and then

1:11:45 > 1:11:48two days later, shoved him out the door.

1:11:48 > 1:11:51Yep, replaced him with R Sargent Shriver.

1:11:51 > 1:11:54McGovern had made the biggest mistake a politician can make,

1:11:54 > 1:11:56which is to stab your buddy in the back.

1:11:56 > 1:12:00Apparently that's a lot worse than breaking into Watergate.

1:12:00 > 1:12:02Nixon won by a landslide

1:12:02 > 1:12:05and then America watched the whole thing unravel.

1:12:05 > 1:12:08By the time Nixon resigned in August 1974,

1:12:08 > 1:12:12the man who had once been affable old Ike's running mate

1:12:12 > 1:12:16was the most hated politician in the history of history.

1:12:18 > 1:12:23# He thought he was the King of America... #

1:12:23 > 1:12:26Nixon spent two more years in office, and was forced to resign.

1:12:26 > 1:12:30The only POTUS to do so, although it was touch and go at one point for

1:12:30 > 1:12:32Bill Clinton.

1:12:32 > 1:12:36One of the last conversations I had with President Eisenhower,

1:12:36 > 1:12:39as a matter of fact the last conversation I had with him

1:12:39 > 1:12:41before I was inaugurated,

1:12:41 > 1:12:46he called me on the phone, he said he wanted to wish me well.

1:12:46 > 1:12:49And then he went on to say, and his voice broke a bit when he said it,

1:12:49 > 1:12:54he said, "You know, I have only one regret on this great day.

1:12:54 > 1:12:57"This is the last time I can ever call you Dick."

1:13:12 > 1:13:17So the 1972 elections are full of almost Shakespearean intrigue

1:13:17 > 1:13:20and deception and anger and chaos and yet apparently,

1:13:20 > 1:13:24so uneventful that Hunter S Thompson feels the need to make up stuff

1:13:24 > 1:13:28about ibogaine and Brazilian witch doctors. Why?

1:13:29 > 1:13:32Because Americans know it's hype.

1:13:32 > 1:13:37It's all one big dog and pony extravaganza.

1:13:37 > 1:13:41Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Senator Marco Rubio...

1:13:41 > 1:13:45They watch the spectacle of men fighting savagely for a party nomination,

1:13:45 > 1:13:48calling each other whores and traitors and slimeballs,

1:13:48 > 1:13:51right up until the convention.

1:13:51 > 1:13:55An air of expectancy hangs over the Cow Palace as the time for the chief business of the convention,

1:13:55 > 1:13:57the nominations, approaches.

1:13:57 > 1:14:00But then, once the guy's nominated, they all come together in

1:14:00 > 1:14:04a miraculous mutual orgasm of party unity.

1:14:04 > 1:14:07Come on, let's let bygones be bygones and join together and

1:14:07 > 1:14:11put the old stomp and whips on the opposing candidate.

1:14:11 > 1:14:13And then the real race begins.

1:14:13 > 1:14:17It'll be won by the team with the best organisation and the most money.

1:14:17 > 1:14:19You gather as many earnest,

1:14:19 > 1:14:23unjaded foot soldiers as you possibly can, you canvass

1:14:23 > 1:14:28every state by foot and by phone, and you work it just like Santa Claus.

1:14:28 > 1:14:33The only problem is, Santa Claus doesn't exist.

1:14:33 > 1:14:35And neither does true democracy.

1:14:35 > 1:14:37Because we don't elect the president,

1:14:37 > 1:14:38just in case you didn't know it.

1:14:38 > 1:14:41Nope, we go to the polls and we write down on

1:14:41 > 1:14:44a piece of paper who we would LIKE to see president.

1:14:49 > 1:14:53So quite simply, we the people don't directly vote for the president.

1:14:53 > 1:14:56We cast our vote for our state's electors, who are pledged to

1:14:56 > 1:14:59one or other presidential electorate,

1:14:59 > 1:15:01and this system is called the electoral college.

1:15:03 > 1:15:07Look, we all know why we had an electoral college in the original

1:15:07 > 1:15:10Constitution, it was because the folks who drafted the Constitution

1:15:10 > 1:15:13didn't trust average folks to elect the president.

1:15:13 > 1:15:16They wanted them to vote for people like them,

1:15:16 > 1:15:17who THEN would elect the president.

1:15:17 > 1:15:22Well, that was...in 1787.

1:15:22 > 1:15:23Yeah, it's a flawed system,

1:15:23 > 1:15:27and it allowed George W Bush to get elected when he beat Al Gore.

1:15:30 > 1:15:32It's absolutely...dumb.

1:15:32 > 1:15:36And we ended up with a situation in which one guy won the popular vote

1:15:36 > 1:15:38and the other guy became president.

1:15:38 > 1:15:41And in my opinion, it was a disaster.

1:15:41 > 1:15:43Yep, the best man doesn't always win.

1:15:51 > 1:15:55Let's imagine for a second an alternative historical scenario.

1:15:55 > 1:15:57What if Al Gore had become president?

1:15:57 > 1:15:58How would the world be different?

1:16:00 > 1:16:02Sorry, can't come up with anything.

1:16:02 > 1:16:04Nothing would have changed - his most notable achievement

1:16:04 > 1:16:08would be just making it into this documentary to fill up some space,

1:16:08 > 1:16:09same as his presidency.

1:16:09 > 1:16:12Yeah, he might have lowered global temperatures by half a degree

1:16:12 > 1:16:14but let's face it, the Kardashians would still be

1:16:14 > 1:16:17showing way too much skin - nothing changes.

1:16:27 > 1:16:30So now, you've made it to the White House, congratulations,

1:16:30 > 1:16:33Mr Big Face. You're the leader of the free world.

1:16:33 > 1:16:36But have you bothered to read the job description?

1:16:36 > 1:16:38What do we expect of a president?

1:16:38 > 1:16:42Well, obviously and unbelievably - everything.

1:16:42 > 1:16:46After all, he's the most powerful man on earth, right? Yeah, on paper.

1:16:46 > 1:16:48But when a president gets into office,

1:16:48 > 1:16:52he has to spend a lot of time just trying to acquire power.

1:16:52 > 1:16:55I'll give you a hypothetical example.

1:16:55 > 1:17:00As president, I will ban all Muslims.

1:17:00 > 1:17:02Can he do that? Does he have the authority?

1:17:02 > 1:17:05Yeah, well, sort of.

1:17:05 > 1:17:09He could invoke section 8 of the US code which says...

1:17:13 > 1:17:15..tell your story walking.

1:17:15 > 1:17:18But then he would have to get the majority of Congress to agree with him, and then they

1:17:18 > 1:17:21would be challenged by the Supreme Court, who would probably override

1:17:21 > 1:17:25the whole thing as incredibly, incredibly unconstitutional.

1:17:27 > 1:17:32So it's likely that the ban would be imposed, stalled, rescinded,

1:17:32 > 1:17:34reimposed, stalled, re-rescinded,

1:17:34 > 1:17:38leaving a lot of angry Muslims stranded at the airport.

1:17:38 > 1:17:42And that would be one busy multi-faith prayer room.

1:17:42 > 1:17:44What's your point, Rich, other than trying to open

1:17:44 > 1:17:46a floodgate of angry letters from the BBC?

1:17:46 > 1:17:52My point is that a president has to fight for every decision. Boom.

1:17:52 > 1:17:56No knockout, 12 brutal rounds, against federal judges,

1:17:56 > 1:18:00and congressmen, the Supreme Court, the opposing party,

1:18:00 > 1:18:04people within his own party, it's a constant, unending grind.

1:18:04 > 1:18:05# Fight the power

1:18:07 > 1:18:08# Fight the power

1:18:08 > 1:18:10# Fight the power... #

1:18:10 > 1:18:13The perception is that the president is the most powerful man in the world.

1:18:13 > 1:18:16Yeah, he stands atop our government

1:18:16 > 1:18:17and he exercises power in a way that no other

1:18:17 > 1:18:19political actor in the US does,

1:18:19 > 1:18:20on the one hand,

1:18:20 > 1:18:22but on the other hand,

1:18:22 > 1:18:25he operates in a system that is stacked against him and so he

1:18:25 > 1:18:31stumbles, and scratches and claws for power wherever he can find it.

1:18:31 > 1:18:35Take for instance Obama's repeated efforts on gun control.

1:18:35 > 1:18:36In the aftermath of Sandy Hook,

1:18:36 > 1:18:40he comes out, puts together a commission led by his vice president

1:18:40 > 1:18:43that's going to propose all kinds of legislative enactments

1:18:43 > 1:18:46and he hits a wall in Congress, doesn't get anywhere.

1:18:46 > 1:18:50He's the president of the United States and he's grasping for

1:18:50 > 1:18:53whatever he can find in order to make advancements.

1:18:53 > 1:18:57So a savvy president doesn't wade into a mass confrontation

1:18:57 > 1:19:00against judges and congressmen, and opposing linebackers.

1:19:00 > 1:19:02He does an end run.

1:19:04 > 1:19:08There are a lot of unilateral powers that presidents have claimed,

1:19:08 > 1:19:11they've invented, adapted to suit their needs, executive orders,

1:19:11 > 1:19:13national security directives, memoranda...

1:19:13 > 1:19:16A security directive is the president's ultimate secret weapon

1:19:16 > 1:19:19it's like a double barrelled shotgun,

1:19:19 > 1:19:22but one of the barrels is always bent and aimed at their own foot.

1:19:23 > 1:19:26He uses it when he has to make a decision that he thinks is

1:19:26 > 1:19:30right for the moment but probably won't look that good in retrospect.

1:19:30 > 1:19:33He will use it if it's a time of crisis or if he wants to

1:19:33 > 1:19:34create a crisis.

1:19:37 > 1:19:40Congress never finds out about security directives until

1:19:40 > 1:19:42it's too late to do anything about it.

1:19:42 > 1:19:45And they're not subject to the Freedom of Information Act.

1:19:45 > 1:19:48So Americans have no idea how many security directives are

1:19:48 > 1:19:52floating around out there - but one thing is for certain, every

1:19:52 > 1:19:56president since Truman, who more or less invented it, has used them.

1:19:57 > 1:20:02Truman called them NDSs - National Security Directives -

1:20:02 > 1:20:05and he issued one that basically said if Japan ever pulls that

1:20:05 > 1:20:07Pearl Harbor shit again, this time,

1:20:07 > 1:20:10we don't screw around for two years, we annihilate them right away.

1:20:10 > 1:20:13Naturally, when Congress caught wind of this, they said, "Hey,

1:20:13 > 1:20:16"hey, Harry, you can't just go around willy-nilly threatening

1:20:16 > 1:20:20"nations with a hydrogen bomb. Enough with the NSDs."

1:20:20 > 1:20:22So, since then, presidents just keep changing the initials

1:20:22 > 1:20:24of a security directive

1:20:24 > 1:20:26and redefining them for their own purposes.

1:20:26 > 1:20:28ROCK MUSIC

1:20:28 > 1:20:31When Eisenhower became President and wanted to force an embargo

1:20:31 > 1:20:37against trade with the USSR, he just changed the name from NSD to NSCP...

1:20:39 > 1:20:42..and adapted it to his needs.

1:20:42 > 1:20:45JFK used one to invade the Bay of Pigs in Cuba.

1:20:45 > 1:20:47He renamed it an NSAM...

1:20:51 > 1:20:55Reagan changed the NSAM to NSDD,

1:20:55 > 1:20:56which I believe means...

1:20:59 > 1:21:01..and promptly sold arms to Iran, then funnelled the money

1:21:01 > 1:21:03to Contras in Nicaragua.

1:21:04 > 1:21:07And George Bush changed the NSDD to NSPD...

1:21:12 > 1:21:14He didn't know what it meant - he can't spell.

1:21:17 > 1:21:20So, basically, whenever a president wants to do something

1:21:20 > 1:21:22he is pretty sure is a little bit ropey,

1:21:22 > 1:21:25he just shuffles some letters and hopes he doesn't get caught.

1:21:25 > 1:21:27Cos that's what presidents do -

1:21:27 > 1:21:30a lot of sneaking around behind Congress' back.

1:21:30 > 1:21:32The odds are stacked against him,

1:21:32 > 1:21:34they don't have the power they need, which is precisely why

1:21:34 > 1:21:37they scratch and claw at every turn to get what power they can

1:21:37 > 1:21:39in order to make a lasting mark.

1:21:39 > 1:21:44And those who do or those who leave a legacy are worth remembering.

1:21:56 > 1:21:59Nobody wants to be remembered as a crap president.

1:21:59 > 1:22:02How do you know you were a crap president? Very simple.

1:22:02 > 1:22:03After you're dead,

1:22:03 > 1:22:06just look around and see how much stuff is named after you.

1:22:06 > 1:22:09If all it is is a library and an elementary school

1:22:09 > 1:22:13in a rundown neighbourhood, yeah, you were a pretty crappy president.

1:22:13 > 1:22:15The good thing about bad presidents -

1:22:15 > 1:22:17they save Americans money.

1:22:19 > 1:22:22George Washington - father of our country.

1:22:22 > 1:22:26Thomas Jefferson - author of the Declaration of Independence.

1:22:26 > 1:22:30Abraham Lincoln - the Emancipation Proclamation.

1:22:30 > 1:22:34Without a doubt, these men and more served their country gloriously.

1:22:34 > 1:22:38They'll be forever in our hearts, but isn't that enough?

1:22:38 > 1:22:40You know how much of Americans' hard-earned money goes

1:22:40 > 1:22:44to maintaining these granite monstrosities year after year?

1:22:44 > 1:22:46Hundreds of millions, that's how much.

1:22:46 > 1:22:51Jesus, do we have to prop up their rampant dead egos forever?

1:22:51 > 1:22:54Why can't a candidate just say, "Look, elect me, I will serve

1:22:54 > 1:22:58"faithfully for four years, eight years tops and then when I'm dead,

1:22:58 > 1:23:01"I will have myself buried in an unmarked grave underneath

1:23:01 > 1:23:03"a random overpass somewhere.

1:23:03 > 1:23:05"I will never cost you another dime"?

1:23:07 > 1:23:08I'd vote for that person.

1:23:14 > 1:23:16Hi, my name's Vermin Supreme.

1:23:16 > 1:23:17I'm running for president of America.

1:23:17 > 1:23:20I have a four-platform plank.

1:23:20 > 1:23:22Plank number one - time travel research.

1:23:22 > 1:23:26I'm the only candidate who will go back in time and kill baby Hitler

1:23:26 > 1:23:28with my own bare hands.

1:23:31 > 1:23:35Ultimately, you go down in presidential history as good or bad.

1:23:35 > 1:23:37So, what makes a good president?

1:23:39 > 1:23:45A good president is one who is not ideological but who is pragmatic.

1:23:45 > 1:23:48I think in the last 20 years, in this country,

1:23:48 > 1:23:51we've had a pragmatist in the White House and his wife

1:23:51 > 1:23:55might be the next pragmatist in the White House.

1:23:55 > 1:23:57Any leader throughout history has to be larger than life.

1:23:57 > 1:24:01The presidents who were larger than life but who had within them

1:24:01 > 1:24:04caring and concern were probably the best presidents,

1:24:04 > 1:24:07like FDR, like Abraham Lincoln.

1:24:07 > 1:24:12The great presidents generally governed in times of crisis,

1:24:12 > 1:24:15which made their actions, their role,

1:24:15 > 1:24:19their presidency more important in many ways.

1:24:19 > 1:24:22So, Franklin Delano Roosevelt - a great president?

1:24:22 > 1:24:25Yes, a great president, no question about it.

1:24:25 > 1:24:27There have been great presidents but let's face it,

1:24:27 > 1:24:30America's history is also littered with intelligent, talented,

1:24:30 > 1:24:33effective men who wasted a sizeable chunk of their lives

1:24:33 > 1:24:34being president.

1:24:38 > 1:24:41Jimmy Carter was a US Naval officer, nuclear engineer,

1:24:41 > 1:24:45successful farmer, Georgia governor and human rights activist.

1:24:46 > 1:24:50But for four years between 1977 and 1981,

1:24:50 > 1:24:53he completely disappeared from the face of earth.

1:24:53 > 1:24:55Nobody knew where he was.

1:24:55 > 1:24:57Turns out he was holed up in this building,

1:24:57 > 1:25:01ineptly trying to free a bunch of hostages in Iran for four years.

1:25:02 > 1:25:05Fortunately, the man realised what a colossal waste of time being

1:25:05 > 1:25:09president was and went back to doing something useful, namely,

1:25:09 > 1:25:14building houses for homeless people and winning the Nobel Peace Prize.

1:25:14 > 1:25:17Carter's uneventful term in the White House made him realise

1:25:17 > 1:25:19what he was supposed to be doing with his talents.

1:25:19 > 1:25:23He learned something about himself from his experience,

1:25:23 > 1:25:26which is more than you can say for some presidents.

1:25:26 > 1:25:28- JOURNALIST:- What would your biggest mistake be,

1:25:28 > 1:25:31what would you say and what lessons have you learned from it?

1:25:31 > 1:25:34I wish you had given me this written question ahead of time

1:25:34 > 1:25:36so I could plan for it.

1:25:36 > 1:25:40I don't want to sound like I made no mistakes, I'm confident I have.

1:25:40 > 1:25:41I just haven't...

1:25:41 > 1:25:45He has put me under the spot here and maybe I am not as quick

1:25:45 > 1:25:47on my feet as I should be in coming up with one.

1:25:47 > 1:25:51So, maybe, a good, fitting last question is -

1:25:51 > 1:25:54did anybody ever have fun being president?

1:25:54 > 1:25:56Yeah, I'm pretty sure one guy did -

1:25:56 > 1:25:57Teddy Roosevelt.

1:26:00 > 1:26:03Now, I can't stress enough that Teddy Roosevelt was

1:26:03 > 1:26:04a borderline psychopath on whom

1:26:04 > 1:26:07no presidential standard should be based,

1:26:07 > 1:26:08but, boy, did he love the job.

1:26:08 > 1:26:11Being president was just one of the things

1:26:11 > 1:26:14he did between cattle ranching, writing books,

1:26:14 > 1:26:16modelling moustaches, shooting Spaniards,

1:26:16 > 1:26:20invading helpless countries and building the world's biggest canal.

1:26:21 > 1:26:23He put a boxing ring in the White House,

1:26:23 > 1:26:25ran up and down the staircases every day,

1:26:25 > 1:26:28walked around whacking all his friends with a big stick.

1:26:28 > 1:26:30Does this remind you of anyone?

1:26:30 > 1:26:33I think it's a safe bet that somewhere in Putin's library

1:26:33 > 1:26:38is a really dog-eared biography of Teddy Roosevelt.

1:26:38 > 1:26:39When his eight years were up,

1:26:39 > 1:26:42he went off to Africa to shoot critters, got bored,

1:26:42 > 1:26:46came back, started up his own party so he could do it all again.

1:26:46 > 1:26:49Yep, that's what Teddy Roosevelt did.

1:26:49 > 1:26:51How many times have you checked your Facebook page in the last hour?

1:26:51 > 1:26:53Four? Lightweight.

1:26:53 > 1:26:57Show me a person who had fun being president,

1:26:57 > 1:27:00and I'll show you someone who needs therapy.

1:27:02 > 1:27:05Recently, if I were to pick one, I'd pick Clinton.

1:27:05 > 1:27:09I think he relished his time in office in ways that other

1:27:09 > 1:27:11presidents have not.

1:27:11 > 1:27:13For them, it has been a little bit more of a slog.

1:27:13 > 1:27:17I was actually an admirer of Bush 1's foreign policy.

1:27:17 > 1:27:21He had a view of the world which I thought was really

1:27:21 > 1:27:24quite mature and quite responsible,

1:27:24 > 1:27:26and talked about it in some length by the way in his memoirs.

1:27:26 > 1:27:29Too bad his kid didn't read them.

1:27:29 > 1:27:33I don't think anyone ever had as much fun in the presidency as FDR.

1:27:33 > 1:27:38Franklin Roosevelt loved power, loved political manipulation,

1:27:38 > 1:27:40loved getting things done.

1:27:40 > 1:27:43This is a man who really revelled in being president.

1:27:43 > 1:27:46I think Johnson was probably the one that I would pick.

1:27:46 > 1:27:49He played a lot of dirty tricks to win that election and '64

1:27:49 > 1:27:51but when he was president,

1:27:51 > 1:27:54he brought all that Texas wheeling and dealing and profanity

1:27:54 > 1:27:57and whiskey drinking and everything to the White House

1:27:57 > 1:28:00and he was larger than life

1:28:00 > 1:28:03and he really, really - I think - enjoyed being president.

1:28:03 > 1:28:06I think he hated to leave it but he was of course done in

1:28:06 > 1:28:07by the Vietnam War.

1:28:07 > 1:28:11Well, none of them want to leave because it means

1:28:11 > 1:28:16their life as the centre of the universe is over.

1:28:16 > 1:28:17Yeah.

1:28:17 > 1:28:20You have to want it, it's an impossible job.

1:28:20 > 1:28:22It's a job that would break most men.

1:28:22 > 1:28:27It's also a job that launches you into history and allows you

1:28:27 > 1:28:30to affect change in ways that no other job can.

1:28:30 > 1:28:34Wouldn't you like to be the most powerful person in the free world?

1:28:41 > 1:28:44My guess is that being president for better or worse is a long,

1:28:44 > 1:28:47strange trip you never quite come back from.

1:28:47 > 1:28:49After all, you've been the most powerful man in the world.

1:28:49 > 1:28:52What are you going to do for a rush after that?

1:28:52 > 1:28:54That's why Bill Clinton is going to feel like the luckiest guy in

1:28:54 > 1:28:57the world if he gets back into the White House as the First Dude,

1:28:57 > 1:29:01gets to run around and pee in every corner and re-mark territory.

1:29:01 > 1:29:04That sounds like a prediction - it is.

1:29:04 > 1:29:06You don't have to panic, Britain,

1:29:06 > 1:29:09Donald Trump is not going to be president.

1:29:09 > 1:29:11I will wager everything on that.

1:29:11 > 1:29:14I will go so far as to say if Donald Trump becomes president,

1:29:14 > 1:29:17I will never appear on British television again,

1:29:17 > 1:29:19and that is a promise.

1:29:19 > 1:29:21HE LAUGHS Who am I kidding?

1:29:21 > 1:29:24If Trump becomes president, I'm spending all my time in Britain.

1:29:25 > 1:29:28I'm Rich Hall and I approve this message.

1:29:29 > 1:29:32# Everybody pack your picnic lunch

1:29:32 > 1:29:35# And everybody pack your gun

1:29:36 > 1:29:41# Cos you can't trust no-one

1:29:43 > 1:29:48# No, you can't trust no-one

1:29:51 > 1:29:56# No, you can't trust no-one. #