0:00:03 > 0:00:06Growing numbers of white British women are converting to Islam.
0:00:08 > 0:00:13But why would they want to give up all the freedoms their Western life allows?
0:00:13 > 0:00:18If you're one of these people that enjoy going out clubbing and getting completely rat-arsed, you know,
0:00:18 > 0:00:22like, laying in the curb at four o'clock in the morning, with sick on your face and stuff,
0:00:22 > 0:00:26then maybe Islam isn't for you, even though you might need it!
0:00:26 > 0:00:30How easy is it for converts to adapt to a faith where men can
0:00:30 > 0:00:32marry up to four wives?
0:00:32 > 0:00:35All my friends know that I'm a co-wife,
0:00:35 > 0:00:38I've never kept that a secret from anyone.
0:00:38 > 0:00:41But why are they embracing a faith that some people associate
0:00:41 > 0:00:43with religious extremism?
0:00:43 > 0:00:45The way I see it is, I'm not a terrorist,
0:00:45 > 0:00:49and I know that my fiance, the way he is, he's not a terrorist.
0:00:49 > 0:00:53Unlike the converts, Shanna Bukhari was born and brought up a Muslim.
0:00:53 > 0:00:57I believe in my religion - being modern doesn't mean
0:00:57 > 0:00:59I don't believe in God.
0:00:59 > 0:01:02But she doesn't regularly practise her Muslim faith. She loves
0:01:02 > 0:01:08all the freedoms her Western life allows - in fact, she's a model.
0:01:09 > 0:01:13In total contrast, she'll be meeting converts who try to follow
0:01:13 > 0:01:16Islamic guidelines in everything they do.
0:01:16 > 0:01:19I want to know why women are converting to Islam,
0:01:19 > 0:01:21so I'm going to go and meet five converts and try
0:01:21 > 0:01:25understanding why they've converted to a new religion.
0:01:25 > 0:01:28She'll find out how Islam's changed their lives,
0:01:28 > 0:01:31and what unexpected difficulties they've had to face.
0:01:31 > 0:01:34I don't know how converts get married, I really don't.
0:01:35 > 0:01:39But what might the converts teach Shanna about her own faith?
0:01:39 > 0:01:40I look Muslim.
0:01:48 > 0:01:53Shanna's a 26-year-old Muslim from Manchester, and she's a top model.
0:01:53 > 0:01:58I just love the whole...looking so elegant, glamorous, pretty,
0:01:58 > 0:01:59dolled-up.
0:02:01 > 0:02:05At the age of fifteen I just knew I wanted to get into modelling.
0:02:05 > 0:02:09Shanna comes from a large British Pakistani family.
0:02:09 > 0:02:13I was the only one out of all the daughters who loved
0:02:13 > 0:02:16dressing up, who would change, like, three to four times a day,
0:02:16 > 0:02:20who would want to wear Mummy's lipstick when Mummy's out. I used
0:02:20 > 0:02:24to love wearing dresses every day and being dressed up all the time.
0:02:28 > 0:02:31I get excited just saying "shopping" cos I love it so much.
0:02:31 > 0:02:36Shoes, handbags, gorgeous outfits - I'm happy.
0:02:38 > 0:02:41Shanna wants to know why so many girls her age would turn
0:02:41 > 0:02:45their back on what most people think are the best bits of being young.
0:02:45 > 0:02:49You're a young British female and you can wear what you want,
0:02:49 > 0:02:51you can have a crazy night out and come home
0:02:51 > 0:02:57at five in the morning with a hangover and you can do all these
0:02:57 > 0:03:01things, and it's like, OK, why are you choosing to leave all this
0:03:01 > 0:03:06fun and excitement and come into a total new faith that says,
0:03:06 > 0:03:11"you can't drink this alcohol, you've got to start dressing differently,"
0:03:11 > 0:03:14so what is it that makes you choose
0:03:14 > 0:03:17and leave all that behind and come to something so new?
0:03:18 > 0:03:23A recent YouGov survey found that 69% of respondents think
0:03:23 > 0:03:25Islam encourages the repression of women
0:03:25 > 0:03:29and 50% associate Islam with terrorism.
0:03:29 > 0:03:33What puzzles me is someone who's new to the faith and religion,
0:03:33 > 0:03:36don't they automatically think extremism, terrorism?
0:03:36 > 0:03:41Does it not put them off and think, "What is Islam?"
0:03:41 > 0:03:44Despite all that, it's estimated that last year around five thousand
0:03:44 > 0:03:47people converted to Islam in the UK.
0:03:47 > 0:03:51Over half were white, and three-quarters of them were women.
0:03:56 > 0:04:00Shanna's setting out on her journey. She's travelling to Wales
0:04:00 > 0:04:04to meet her first convert, who's a brand-new Muslim.
0:04:05 > 0:04:07In a small community near Bridgend,
0:04:07 > 0:04:11Claire's the only white Muslim girl in the village.
0:04:11 > 0:04:14Like many converts, she's taken a new Islamic name,
0:04:14 > 0:04:18and now she likes to be known as Safir.
0:04:18 > 0:04:21I'm going to wear mine like this today cos that's the way I like it.
0:04:21 > 0:04:27She's 24, and lives with her mum and dad - Jill and Bryan.
0:04:27 > 0:04:29She was brought up a Christian
0:04:29 > 0:04:32and she graduated from college this year.
0:04:32 > 0:04:34Partying didn't have the same appeal for Safir that it does to
0:04:34 > 0:04:39most girls in their twenties - Islam offered her something different.
0:04:39 > 0:04:41I'm quite a conservative person.
0:04:41 > 0:04:43In Britain, everybody's very loose, you know -
0:04:43 > 0:04:45you can go out and get drunk.
0:04:45 > 0:04:49I've never been like that and this is why Islam was so appealing
0:04:49 > 0:04:54to me, because it was a religion where it was quite conservative.
0:04:54 > 0:04:58And obviously nothing like that really exists in Britain any more.
0:04:58 > 0:05:01While most girls in Britain wear what they want, practising
0:05:01 > 0:05:07Muslim women often wear hijab - a head scarf and long loose clothing.
0:05:07 > 0:05:10So what if you have to wear a long dress and, you know,
0:05:10 > 0:05:11cover yourself modestly?
0:05:11 > 0:05:15It's good dressing, you know, why would you want to have
0:05:15 > 0:05:19everything out? D'you know what I mean - what's the point?
0:05:19 > 0:05:22Who are you trying to prove to?
0:05:22 > 0:05:25If you are really OK with yourself, who cares what you wear?
0:05:25 > 0:05:30I'm a very fashionable person, but I'll do it with my own style.
0:05:30 > 0:05:33Things won't be out, my legs won't be out, my bum won't be out -
0:05:33 > 0:05:35do you get what I mean? But I'll still look really nice.
0:05:35 > 0:05:39There's a way of dressing that looks nice - and modestly.
0:05:41 > 0:05:44Some people might think these rules are repressive,
0:05:44 > 0:05:45but Safir doesn't think so.
0:05:46 > 0:05:49All this stuff about women being oppressed
0:05:49 > 0:05:54and stuff is complete codswallop. It is! Most of the girls I know...
0:05:54 > 0:05:58Well, pretty much all the girls I know - the Muslims -
0:05:58 > 0:06:02they're spoilt rotten. If we want to work, we can work if we want.
0:06:02 > 0:06:06If we don't want to, our husband will provide for us, you know.
0:06:06 > 0:06:07And it says in the Qur'an
0:06:07 > 0:06:10that a women can chase knowledge if she wishes.
0:06:13 > 0:06:16Safir's come to the station to meet Shanna.
0:06:16 > 0:06:18She only became a Muslim a few weeks ago,
0:06:18 > 0:06:22so she has lots to tell about what it's like to be a convert.
0:06:22 > 0:06:24It's a big day for her as she has an important meeting
0:06:24 > 0:06:26at the mosque in Cardiff.
0:06:26 > 0:06:29- Hello.- Hi, Shanna!
0:06:29 > 0:06:31- I love this.- Thank you.
0:06:31 > 0:06:34- Have you been Muslim all your life? - Yeah.
0:06:34 > 0:06:37OK. That's a stupid question, really!
0:06:37 > 0:06:39So where are we going today?
0:06:39 > 0:06:42Basically we're going to catch the train into Cardiff
0:06:42 > 0:06:43and I'm going to take you to my local mosque.
0:06:43 > 0:06:45Why are we going to the mosque?
0:06:45 > 0:06:48Basically, when I converted they were going to give me
0:06:48 > 0:06:51- a certificate of authenticity that I'm a Muslim!- Wow!
0:06:51 > 0:06:52Tickets, please.
0:06:52 > 0:06:56Muslims believe that when you convert to Islam, all the sins
0:06:56 > 0:06:59you've committed in your past are wiped out.
0:06:59 > 0:07:02- When did you convert?- It was like a couple of weeks ago, you know.
0:07:02 > 0:07:04It was like, everybody gets really excited,
0:07:04 > 0:07:08cos I'm like a new-born Muslim and everybody's like, "Oh, will you pray
0:07:08 > 0:07:11"for me, will you pray for me?" you know, because apparently, you know
0:07:11 > 0:07:15my prayers are a bit more powerful because they consider me as pure.
0:07:15 > 0:07:18How long have you been wearing the headscarf?
0:07:18 > 0:07:21I kind of experimented with it, I've got to be honest, I kind of put
0:07:21 > 0:07:24a scarf on my hair and wondered like, can I do this, you know.
0:07:24 > 0:07:27But there are Muslims out there that don't even wear hijabs,
0:07:27 > 0:07:31- you know, like you.- Yeah! (LAUGHS) You know what I mean, it's like, you don't have to wear it.
0:07:31 > 0:07:33Do you find, though, it helps you, like?
0:07:33 > 0:07:37To be honest, they do look at you more, especially the men,
0:07:37 > 0:07:39especially the men. It's ridiculous.
0:07:39 > 0:07:42I mean, men come on to me just because I'm wearing a hijab.
0:07:42 > 0:07:44Do you feel restricted in any way?
0:07:44 > 0:07:47Where I live, everything is so constrictive.
0:07:47 > 0:07:51Cos I'm white as well, people think that I'm a traitor
0:07:51 > 0:07:54and stuff which I'm not.
0:07:56 > 0:07:59Converting to Islam is relatively straightforward.
0:07:59 > 0:08:02You need to recite a statement saying that Allah is the only God
0:08:02 > 0:08:05and Muhammad is his prophet.
0:08:05 > 0:08:09It's said in front of witnesses, and it's known as a shahada.
0:08:09 > 0:08:13This is the centre where I did my shahada,
0:08:13 > 0:08:15so basically now we're going to go in,
0:08:15 > 0:08:19hopefully get my certificate that they've hopefully done for me.
0:08:19 > 0:08:22- Come in.- Hi.- Hello, Claire. - Hi, Uncle. How are you?
0:08:22 > 0:08:23Fine, thank you. Come in.
0:08:23 > 0:08:25Thank you.
0:08:25 > 0:08:28The certificate. Let's read it together.
0:08:28 > 0:08:29It says...
0:08:31 > 0:08:33It's an Islamic testimony certificate.
0:08:33 > 0:08:3619th of September, 2012.
0:08:36 > 0:08:39"To whom it may concern - Claire Louise Evans, aka Safir,
0:08:42 > 0:08:44"this is to certify that Miss Claire Louise Evans, Safir,
0:08:44 > 0:08:51"has been embraced and accepted Islam as a religion on August, 2012."
0:08:51 > 0:08:54- Congratulations. - Thank you very much. It's very nice.
0:08:56 > 0:08:59Accepting Allah has changed Safir's outlook on life.
0:08:59 > 0:09:01I noticed a couple of weeks ago,
0:09:01 > 0:09:07I went out and I felt like my eyes were open, do you get what I mean?
0:09:07 > 0:09:11It's like I saw everything again, you know? It was so weird, you know,
0:09:11 > 0:09:15I just find that Allah has just showered me in blessings and stuff.
0:09:15 > 0:09:16Hey, how did it go?
0:09:16 > 0:09:17Hi. Here it is.
0:09:17 > 0:09:20Wow! So you have your certificate now.
0:09:20 > 0:09:26Yes, I'm definitely Muslim, but it's all in here, really.
0:09:27 > 0:09:32Being accepted as a Muslim is nerve-racking for converts
0:09:32 > 0:09:34and the mosque is Safir's first hurdle.
0:09:34 > 0:09:38Eva, this is Claire. Claire, this is Eva. She's new to Islam.
0:09:38 > 0:09:40She converted about a month ago.
0:09:40 > 0:09:45The good news is, she's made welcome by the local Muslim community
0:09:45 > 0:09:47up in the women's prayer hall.
0:09:47 > 0:09:49How are you feeling?
0:09:49 > 0:09:52Ah! Like - new, you know?
0:09:52 > 0:09:54- Happy?- Happy, very happy. - Comfortable?
0:09:54 > 0:09:55Yes.
0:09:55 > 0:09:58This is like a small gift from me and my family.
0:09:58 > 0:10:00- You didn't have to.- It's prayer clothes for when you pray.
0:10:00 > 0:10:04- It'll be so much easier for you at home, and a prayer mat.- Oh, my gosh!
0:10:04 > 0:10:08- So instead of you... - I'm going to cry now!
0:10:08 > 0:10:11..always having to put stuff on...
0:10:11 > 0:10:16I'm going to cry. Thank you so much, thank you. That's so nice.
0:10:16 > 0:10:21It's so nice to have you here, seriously. Don't lose your passion and motivation.
0:10:21 > 0:10:25Oh, it's so sweet of you. Thank you so much.
0:10:25 > 0:10:26DEVOTIONAL SINGING
0:10:30 > 0:10:33It's time for evening prayer.
0:10:33 > 0:10:36Under Islam, men and women always pray separately,
0:10:36 > 0:10:38to protect women's modesty.
0:10:38 > 0:10:41It's early days for Safir, and praying is new to her.
0:10:43 > 0:10:48Obviously Islam is about Allah - and we all pray to Allah together.
0:10:48 > 0:10:53The feeling you get when you pray, it's much different when you just put your hands together.
0:10:53 > 0:10:55Something washes over you.
0:10:55 > 0:10:58It's like the deepest meditation that you can think of.
0:10:58 > 0:11:02It's the first time Shanna's been in a mosque since she was a child.
0:11:02 > 0:11:07Seeing Safir and the girls pray together has had an unexpected impact.
0:11:07 > 0:11:10Today's been a bit of an experience.
0:11:10 > 0:11:14I felt a bit emotional watching someone who has just newly
0:11:14 > 0:11:19come into a faith that I have been born into, and how she's putting
0:11:19 > 0:11:26all this effort and how I have been neglecting what I should be doing.
0:11:26 > 0:11:29It just got me thinking.
0:11:29 > 0:11:33What makes it more emotional and sad for me is that I know how to pray.
0:11:34 > 0:11:38So I'm sat in a mosque and I'm watching people read
0:11:38 > 0:11:43and I'm saying inside myself, "I know how to do this
0:11:43 > 0:11:47"and I bet you guys think I don't when you look at me."
0:11:47 > 0:11:49I'm a bad girl, aren't I?
0:11:51 > 0:11:52Crap!
0:11:54 > 0:11:59If you're a practising Muslim you're supposed to pray five times a day.
0:11:59 > 0:12:05And wherever you are, you have to pray in the direction of the Muslim holy city, Mecca.
0:12:05 > 0:12:09The first prayer's at the crack of dawn - but Safir's still learning.
0:12:09 > 0:12:15I notice morning prayer is like four until five.
0:12:15 > 0:12:19I've got to be honest, I don't know who gets up at 4.24 in the morning, do you get what I mean?
0:12:19 > 0:12:23You know, you've got to be really dedicated to do that
0:12:23 > 0:12:25cos although I love to pray, I love my sleep as well,
0:12:25 > 0:12:30so I kind of always miss this but I always make up for it later.
0:12:30 > 0:12:34I don't know if you're supposed to do that. I'm probably a really naughty Muslim.
0:12:34 > 0:12:36I still haven't opened this.
0:12:36 > 0:12:39I was kind of afraid to open it in case it got dirty.
0:12:39 > 0:12:43It shows you which way to pray and stuff.
0:12:43 > 0:12:48It's really ironic - it's supposed to be for Islams, and yet it says "made in China". (LAUGHS)
0:12:48 > 0:12:50That's really strange.
0:12:50 > 0:12:56I also have my book, and like, it's a bit childish,
0:12:56 > 0:13:00but it's my book on how to do prayers and stuff.
0:13:00 > 0:13:03So, it's got, like, what you're supposed to say
0:13:03 > 0:13:06and all that sort of stuff in it, you know.
0:13:06 > 0:13:09So whenever I start praying I always have that in front of me
0:13:09 > 0:13:13and I do it really slowly because I can't do it really fast
0:13:13 > 0:13:16because like obviously I'm new, and I want to do it properly.
0:13:19 > 0:13:23One of the toughest hurdles converts have to face is
0:13:23 > 0:13:26the reaction of their families.
0:13:26 > 0:13:29Shanna's come to meet Safir's mum Jill to see what
0:13:29 > 0:13:32she thought about her daughter's decision.
0:13:32 > 0:13:34Hello!
0:13:34 > 0:13:37How are other members of the family with Safir's
0:13:37 > 0:13:39change of religion now?
0:13:39 > 0:13:41They're not very happy.
0:13:41 > 0:13:44They...they're just not very happy about it.
0:13:44 > 0:13:47Do you think they'll ever get used to the idea?
0:13:47 > 0:13:51It's very hard but I think they are pretty accepting, my family.
0:13:51 > 0:13:55I like to think that they are, and they will come round in time.
0:13:55 > 0:13:57What do you think about Islam?
0:13:57 > 0:14:00I started reading things and I read the Qur'an.
0:14:00 > 0:14:04And I just found lots of it like the Bible.
0:14:04 > 0:14:07You know, which I've read things in the Bible
0:14:07 > 0:14:10and I really don't see it's such a bad religion.
0:14:10 > 0:14:12And things that she's told me,
0:14:12 > 0:14:15that the parents have more say in things.
0:14:17 > 0:14:23I see a lot of things - the way my mother used to say things,
0:14:23 > 0:14:27about courting, and that I had to fetch the boy home and wait.
0:14:27 > 0:14:30The Muslim religion is more of the old-fashioned Christian way.
0:14:34 > 0:14:38Safir's dad Bryan has lived in the Welsh valleys all his life.
0:14:38 > 0:14:42For him, Islam feels like a very foreign religion.
0:14:42 > 0:14:45I can't say I'm really up for it, like.
0:14:45 > 0:14:48It's a different culture, innit?
0:14:48 > 0:14:50But she seems to be happy with it, so, you know...
0:14:52 > 0:14:57She's 24 years of age now, she has her own mind to make up now.
0:14:57 > 0:15:01But I did tell her, you know, she is Welsh, you know what I mean.
0:15:01 > 0:15:04No need to wear the clothes because you know,
0:15:04 > 0:15:06she got her own clothes there.
0:15:06 > 0:15:10At the end of the day, she's got pretty hair, curly,
0:15:10 > 0:15:11like her old man!
0:15:13 > 0:15:15So there's no need to hide it, is there?
0:15:17 > 0:15:21If I did say something, she probably wouldn't talk to me again!
0:15:21 > 0:15:25So at the end of the day, she's got to find out for herself, hasn't she?
0:15:27 > 0:15:32But she knows I'm only at the other end of the phone
0:15:32 > 0:15:33If she ever needs me.
0:15:33 > 0:15:35That's all she's got to do is pick the phone up.
0:15:37 > 0:15:40I feel sorry for her dad going to that pub
0:15:40 > 0:15:43and his friends sitting there with their pint of lager or whatever.
0:15:43 > 0:15:45They'd be like "How's your daughter doing?
0:15:45 > 0:15:47"She still got that thing on her head?"
0:15:47 > 0:15:50They could be making a joke out of it and how is he to reply
0:15:50 > 0:15:51and respond to it?
0:15:53 > 0:15:57He would really thoroughly need to understand his daughter before
0:15:57 > 0:16:01he understands the religion and that just does not happen overnight.
0:16:06 > 0:16:09Next, Shanna's travelling up to Scotland.
0:16:09 > 0:16:13She wants to meet a convert who's been practising Islam for a while.
0:16:13 > 0:16:19Alana converted over two years ago. She's 20 and lives in Glasgow.
0:16:19 > 0:16:21She's a media student,
0:16:21 > 0:16:25but what's most important in her life is her faith - Islam.
0:16:25 > 0:16:30I'm a traveller so I'm from the fairground, and you get Scottish and English travellers.
0:16:30 > 0:16:33We're not gypsies, it's a completely different thing,
0:16:33 > 0:16:35and I grew up on a caravan site.
0:16:42 > 0:16:46This is my home. And that's my wee caravan, my wee cara-hut.
0:16:49 > 0:16:52And I live right across from my mum and dad,
0:16:52 > 0:16:54so if I don't feel like cooking, she feeds me.
0:16:57 > 0:17:03Alana was brought up a Protestant and was baptised as a baby.
0:17:03 > 0:17:07But her conversion to Islam hasn't always been easy.
0:17:07 > 0:17:10It was really hard for me, because especially living in the east end
0:17:10 > 0:17:12of Glasgow, and there's no Muslims here
0:17:12 > 0:17:14and there's such... I'm white, Scottish...
0:17:14 > 0:17:17there's hard... you know, "Why, how odd,
0:17:17 > 0:17:20"why would you choose to be a Muslim?"
0:17:20 > 0:17:22And I feel as if I need to be extra polite,
0:17:22 > 0:17:26for them to know that I'm human, you know, that I'm Scottish,
0:17:26 > 0:17:29cos I feel like they think I'm going to do something to them.
0:17:29 > 0:17:30They've got that look.
0:17:30 > 0:17:32Shanna's come to meet Alana to find out
0:17:32 > 0:17:35if it was hard to leave her old life behind.
0:17:36 > 0:17:39Were you into all that stuff - partying, clubbing...?
0:17:39 > 0:17:43Well, I did go out quite a lot when I was younger.
0:17:43 > 0:17:45Did you used to drink?
0:17:45 > 0:17:47Uh-uh, yeah. I used to drink and go out
0:17:47 > 0:17:49and then I would go out and not drink
0:17:49 > 0:17:51and still go out to the clubs
0:17:51 > 0:17:54and now it's not going out to the clubs and not drinking at all.
0:17:54 > 0:17:56It's more been a change for my friends, adapting,
0:17:56 > 0:18:00- thinking "Why is she not coming out?"- What were they like?
0:18:00 > 0:18:03The first, the typical thing they'd say is "You don't have to drink
0:18:03 > 0:18:04"but still come out," you know.
0:18:04 > 0:18:08"You can be the taxi driver," you know, which was fine.
0:18:08 > 0:18:12And then the more, I was like, "No, this is defeating the purpose."
0:18:12 > 0:18:14What has been the biggest thing you've had to give up?
0:18:14 > 0:18:18I love Parma ham, I love it - the salt, and wrap it around melon,
0:18:18 > 0:18:19it's just beautiful.
0:18:19 > 0:18:22- So, that was the hardest thing? - Yeah, I think, you know,
0:18:22 > 0:18:26I'm known for walking out of Tesco with just a packet of Parma ham
0:18:26 > 0:18:30and just eating it, and I think that has been the hardest thing.
0:18:30 > 0:18:35That's what my cousin says, "How will you give up Parma ham?" and I'm like, "Yeah, I know!"
0:18:35 > 0:18:38But it's by chance that Alana encountered Islam.
0:18:38 > 0:18:41When she first left college two and a half years ago
0:18:41 > 0:18:45she set out for Lanzarote hoping to become a club rep.
0:18:45 > 0:18:49When you're 18, it's the whole "you need to go out and live your life while you're young
0:18:49 > 0:18:52"and do all the things you're going to regret."
0:18:52 > 0:18:54And I was like, I want to go out and do everything I'm going to regret,
0:18:54 > 0:18:58have a crazy six month, just get absolutely mental drunk,
0:18:58 > 0:19:01just go out do what I want to do and have a brilliant time
0:19:01 > 0:19:04and come back and then work. And that just didn't happen.
0:19:07 > 0:19:11What did happen is she met her fiance Abdul -
0:19:11 > 0:19:15he introduced her to Islam - and now they're planning to get married.
0:19:15 > 0:19:19I would have to have an Islamic wedding and a British wedding.
0:19:19 > 0:19:23But I think I would try to make it a bit more like a British wedding, for my dad.
0:19:23 > 0:19:27I'm my dad's one-and-only, so I think I would have the white and the bridesmaids
0:19:27 > 0:19:31just out of respect, that this is their only chance for me to do that.
0:19:31 > 0:19:36So I wouldn't like to make it, you know, look too foreign.
0:19:36 > 0:19:39Would you let the guests get drunk in your wedding?
0:19:39 > 0:19:43No, I think...no, what I mean is, it is people's own choice to drink
0:19:43 > 0:19:45but I think if they're coming to my wedding
0:19:45 > 0:19:47and know I'm a Muslim and that my fiance is a Muslim,
0:19:47 > 0:19:48they should have respect.
0:19:48 > 0:19:51I would write, "If you're not happy about that, don't come."
0:19:51 > 0:19:53And if they love me enough and love my family
0:19:53 > 0:19:54then they should for that one day,
0:19:54 > 0:19:59I'm sure they could manage to not drink for the one night.
0:20:00 > 0:20:04But for Alana the importance of Islam goes far beyond falling
0:20:04 > 0:20:08in love - it answers some of her big questions about life.
0:20:08 > 0:20:13I've always believed in God, well, there being something.
0:20:13 > 0:20:17It doesn't matter what you believe, I think we all deep down,
0:20:17 > 0:20:20you must think, "When I die, I hope I go to a better place."
0:20:20 > 0:20:24You must - you can't be human and not think, "When I die that's it, I don't care."
0:20:24 > 0:20:26Everyone must think, "I want to go somewhere,
0:20:26 > 0:20:28"where my relatives have died," or what.
0:20:28 > 0:20:30You must have that sort of feeling.
0:20:30 > 0:20:33Especially because I never got to meet my Granny and Grandad,
0:20:33 > 0:20:37I always think, well, what happens if they're actually in heaven
0:20:37 > 0:20:40and if I don't get to go there, that would just be terrible.
0:20:40 > 0:20:43But it still required courage for Alana to break the news to
0:20:43 > 0:20:46her family about her conversion.
0:20:46 > 0:20:50Just before Ramadan was when I told my family that I was a Muslim.
0:20:50 > 0:20:53I'd been a Muslim for a while, but I didn't tell them.
0:20:53 > 0:20:54I was freaking out.
0:20:54 > 0:20:57But I thought if I'm going to do Ramadan
0:20:57 > 0:21:00they're going to know I'm not eating, so I had to tell them.
0:21:00 > 0:21:05I finished work and I thought "Right, I'm going to do it."
0:21:05 > 0:21:07So I went in and all of a sudden the adrenaline hit me,
0:21:07 > 0:21:09I started panicking and shaking.
0:21:09 > 0:21:12And I went in, my mom and dad they could tell, they know what I'm like.
0:21:12 > 0:21:16I went, "I've got something to tell you," and I just burst out crying.
0:21:16 > 0:21:17Then my dad started to get annoyed,
0:21:17 > 0:21:19cos he's wanting to watch his programme,
0:21:19 > 0:21:22so he's like "Hurry up, tell us, lass".
0:21:22 > 0:21:24Then my mom's worried. She went, "You're pregnant?"
0:21:24 > 0:21:26My dad's like, "You've crashed your car?"
0:21:26 > 0:21:29And I burst out laughing then, cos then I was like, that's
0:21:29 > 0:21:32the worst thing that they could have thought was going to happen to me.
0:21:32 > 0:21:35And then I was like... "I actually want to be Muslim."
0:21:35 > 0:21:38And my dad talked straight with, "I thought you already was a Muslim."
0:21:38 > 0:21:40And I burst out laughing even more,
0:21:40 > 0:21:42cos I thought well I'm making such a big deal out
0:21:42 > 0:21:47of something that is obviously they, you know, already knew, you know.
0:21:47 > 0:21:50Actually it felt like I was telling them I was gay
0:21:50 > 0:21:54or something like that or I was pregnant, that's what it felt like.
0:21:54 > 0:21:56Alana's determined to learn everything
0:21:56 > 0:22:00she can about her faith. She devotes her free time to studying
0:22:00 > 0:22:02and going to evening classes.
0:22:03 > 0:22:05Tonight Shanna's come to join her
0:22:05 > 0:22:08at her weekly Islamic Studies course.
0:22:08 > 0:22:12Even after I became Muslim, I've studied a lot of books
0:22:12 > 0:22:16and I've read them all back to front, and I've got that many,
0:22:16 > 0:22:17I just felt, I know the basics,
0:22:17 > 0:22:21or I THINK I know the basics and I thought, "I need something else".
0:22:21 > 0:22:24So I was told about iSyllabus and I applied for a scholarship
0:22:24 > 0:22:28and I got accepted. Now, what I would like is to do this course
0:22:28 > 0:22:31and then I would like to study Arabic.
0:22:31 > 0:22:34- Oh, wow. - Because my fiance, he's Arabic,
0:22:34 > 0:22:37he speaks Arabic and if we have any children, insha'Allah,
0:22:37 > 0:22:40then I'd like to be speaking Arabic so I'm not getting talked about,
0:22:40 > 0:22:43they're talking Arabic and I don't know what they're saying.
0:22:43 > 0:22:45I would like that, and I would like to be able to read
0:22:45 > 0:22:47the Qur'an in Arabic, rather than just in English.
0:22:47 > 0:22:50I wouldn't feel as if I'm a proper Muslim in the future
0:22:50 > 0:22:52if I didn't speak some level of Arabic.
0:22:56 > 0:22:58It's really nice to see people
0:22:58 > 0:23:01actually go out of their way to learn.
0:23:01 > 0:23:04At the class the women sit behind the men, and following Islamic
0:23:04 > 0:23:09guidelines on modesty, they cover up, wearing hijab.
0:23:09 > 0:23:13But the lecture's been held up - and Shanna soon finds out why.
0:23:14 > 0:23:17A course official's taken Alana to one side.
0:23:17 > 0:23:21To attend the lecture, Shanna needs to wear a headscarf.
0:23:21 > 0:23:23I'm having to wear a scarf
0:23:23 > 0:23:27because I didn't use my brains before I came here.
0:23:27 > 0:23:28Go on, I'll let you do it.
0:23:32 > 0:23:33Oh, crap - I'm laughing!
0:23:33 > 0:23:34This is really bad.
0:23:40 > 0:23:41Wow, I look so weird.
0:23:43 > 0:23:46I feel so self-conscious about it, do you know what I mean?
0:23:46 > 0:23:50- D'you know what I mean? - It's cos you're not used to it.
0:23:50 > 0:23:53Do you know what it is? It's easier for women to wear less clothes
0:23:53 > 0:23:55than it is for them to put more on.
0:23:55 > 0:23:57It's also that thing...
0:23:57 > 0:24:00It's an intense course and there's lots to learn.
0:24:00 > 0:24:04Alana studies everything from Qur'anic history to sharia law.
0:24:04 > 0:24:06Taqwa.
0:24:06 > 0:24:11It's a term which many people know about. We hear it all the time.
0:24:11 > 0:24:16The class is run by a charity who use a room at Glasgow University.
0:24:16 > 0:24:19So, acting in obedience to God through a guiding light of God
0:24:19 > 0:24:22with the intention of seeking his pleasure.
0:24:23 > 0:24:26Shanna's shocked at the division between the sexes,
0:24:26 > 0:24:29and the different expectations for men and women.
0:24:29 > 0:24:32Automatically when you go into a lecture hall, even though it was
0:24:32 > 0:24:35Islamic, I didn't think you need, these things -
0:24:35 > 0:24:38you need to be covered, and I didn't even think about men, I didn't even
0:24:38 > 0:24:40think about the division of guys and women
0:24:40 > 0:24:42and where they're going to be sat.
0:24:42 > 0:24:45I just thought we're all treated equal and all sat in one room.
0:24:50 > 0:24:53Having made a blunder last night, Alana's asked Shanna over
0:24:53 > 0:24:56to talk about how Muslim women ought to dress.
0:24:57 > 0:24:59Like many converts,
0:24:59 > 0:25:02Alana's interpretation of the dresscode is strict,
0:25:02 > 0:25:06but not all Muslim girls are the same, particularly Shanna.
0:25:07 > 0:25:11Under Islam, haram means forbidden and halal means allowed.
0:25:12 > 0:25:15I've actually 'halal-ified' my wardrobe.
0:25:16 > 0:25:19How do you 'halal-ify' your wardrobe?
0:25:20 > 0:25:22- Halal-ified?- Halal-ified.
0:25:22 > 0:25:24This is really nice. You'd probably like this.
0:25:24 > 0:25:29This is something that I would wear, out of Primark, with tights.
0:25:29 > 0:25:32But if I've got a top on and this skirt, then I can still wear it.
0:25:32 > 0:25:35- Yeah.- Do you know what I mean? So I've 'halal-ified' it!
0:25:35 > 0:25:36So that's 'halal-ified'.
0:25:36 > 0:25:39Yeah, that's my term that I've created, so yeah.
0:25:39 > 0:25:41It's gorgeous, that.
0:25:41 > 0:25:43Now, my non-halal stuff, which would be...
0:25:43 > 0:25:47Non-halal! You've got this division.
0:25:47 > 0:25:49Yeah, I've separated it all.
0:25:49 > 0:25:51So, this would cover me, but it doesn't actually cover my bum,
0:25:51 > 0:25:54so I would know if I was wearing that,
0:25:54 > 0:25:56I'd have to wear a baggier skirt.
0:25:56 > 0:25:57- Oh.- You know.
0:25:57 > 0:25:59But it's still baggy?
0:25:59 > 0:26:01Yeah, but it doesn't cover my bum.
0:26:01 > 0:26:02Fair enough.
0:26:02 > 0:26:04So I've 'halal-ified' it!
0:26:04 > 0:26:06So, I'm 'halal-ified' now, aren't I, in your eyes?
0:26:06 > 0:26:08Aye, your bum is covered.
0:26:08 > 0:26:10But your, yeah, I won't even go there.
0:26:10 > 0:26:12OK, I'm half 'halal-ified'.
0:26:12 > 0:26:13You're half 'halal-ified', yeah.
0:26:13 > 0:26:16- I wore these to my cousin's wedding. - Oh, wow.
0:26:16 > 0:26:18Yeah, so I've kept all my good shoes cos I just love them.
0:26:18 > 0:26:20And I think you'd like these ones.
0:26:20 > 0:26:22These are the best ones.
0:26:22 > 0:26:24So, I wouldn't wear these going out.
0:26:24 > 0:26:25Why?
0:26:25 > 0:26:28Because it's not part of the dress code.
0:26:28 > 0:26:30Are you saying they're not 'halal-ified'?
0:26:30 > 0:26:32No, they're not 'halal-ified'.
0:26:32 > 0:26:33How could shoes possibly...?
0:26:33 > 0:26:36Cos you're walking and wiggling at the same time.
0:26:36 > 0:26:38Are these OK? Are these 'halal-ified'?
0:26:38 > 0:26:41They are, but any higher than that and I wouldn't wear them.
0:26:41 > 0:26:43Surely it's not against...
0:26:43 > 0:26:44Uh-huh.
0:26:44 > 0:26:47I've not heard of it.
0:26:47 > 0:26:49Let me 'hijab-ify' you, and see how good you look.
0:26:49 > 0:26:50Oh, my God!
0:26:51 > 0:26:52Honestly.
0:26:54 > 0:26:56Here we go.
0:26:59 > 0:27:00At least it keeps you warm.
0:27:03 > 0:27:04Yes.
0:27:07 > 0:27:09Oh, beautiful.
0:27:09 > 0:27:11Shall I put my hair up?
0:27:20 > 0:27:21- How do I look? - You look beautiful.
0:27:21 > 0:27:23- Are you serious?- Mm-hmm.
0:27:23 > 0:27:26Take them un-halal boots off.
0:27:29 > 0:27:32It's the most difficult thing to go out and be covered.
0:27:32 > 0:27:35You look beautiful, though.
0:27:35 > 0:27:38It's the first time Shanna's come face-to-face with how strict
0:27:38 > 0:27:41Islam can be when it comes to rules on female dress.
0:27:42 > 0:27:44I look Muslim.
0:27:44 > 0:27:46I don't even know what I feel.
0:27:48 > 0:27:49Transformed?
0:27:50 > 0:27:51You're covered.
0:27:51 > 0:27:55It's not like I was naked and not covered before. It's just...
0:27:58 > 0:28:02I've got something baggy on me, and then you can't see my hair.
0:28:03 > 0:28:05And, em, I feel less pretty.
0:28:06 > 0:28:08Does that sound really bad?
0:28:09 > 0:28:12Well, the whole point of wearing hijab is that you're not going out
0:28:12 > 0:28:15and drawing attention to yourself, so I suppose it's working.
0:28:17 > 0:28:19I don't, I don't, I'm not ready for it, no.
0:28:22 > 0:28:26Shanna didn't expect to be criticised for the way she dresses.
0:28:26 > 0:28:30I don't mean to sound rude to the people who agree with Alana,
0:28:30 > 0:28:33but I totally disagree with that, that you can't wear high heels.
0:28:35 > 0:28:38And my boots were not 'halal-ified' for her.
0:28:38 > 0:28:41I think she was looking at me thinking,
0:28:41 > 0:28:47I'm born into this, as a Muslim, so I think she automatically thought
0:28:47 > 0:28:51"You should be practising and doing what I'm doing,
0:28:51 > 0:28:55"if you're not already, and I've only been doing this for two years",
0:28:55 > 0:28:57and I think she was comparing and contrasting us quite a lot.
0:28:57 > 0:28:59I felt judged by her.
0:28:59 > 0:29:02I'm happy the way I am,
0:29:02 > 0:29:05and it doesn't mean I'm not a Muslim cos I'm not doing it.
0:29:05 > 0:29:08And just cos I'm modern, that's got nothing to do with my religion.
0:29:08 > 0:29:14I will be dying, I was born as a modern British Muslim
0:29:14 > 0:29:17and I will die as a modern British Muslim.
0:29:18 > 0:29:21There's nothing wrong with it!
0:29:21 > 0:29:24It isn't the first time Shanna's felt judged.
0:29:24 > 0:29:26Her modelling career has attracted criticism
0:29:26 > 0:29:28from some Muslims in the past.
0:29:29 > 0:29:34In 2011, Shanna attempted to become the first Muslim to represent
0:29:34 > 0:29:36Britain in the Miss Universe competition.
0:29:37 > 0:29:41The decision led to threats from members of the Muslim community.
0:29:41 > 0:29:44One Miss Universe hopeful has come under an ugly attack
0:29:44 > 0:29:47for wanting to represent Britain in the glamorous pageant.
0:29:47 > 0:29:50She has been threatened with death because of her religion.
0:29:50 > 0:29:54Some of the fellow Muslims out there are saying this is against Islam,
0:29:54 > 0:29:57a woman, as they put it, should not be parading around.
0:29:57 > 0:30:00I don't think I'm doing anything wrong.
0:30:00 > 0:30:02We live in England, we live in... I'm British.
0:30:02 > 0:30:05Yes, I'm Muslim, but we live in such a Western society,
0:30:05 > 0:30:08I didn't think, "Oh, as a Muslim, I can't do this."
0:30:09 > 0:30:11That never crossed my mind.
0:30:13 > 0:30:16Shanna was devastated by the intolerance she met with.
0:30:16 > 0:30:20The hate mail sent to her was so distressing, it's the first time
0:30:20 > 0:30:23she's been able to look at it since the competition.
0:30:23 > 0:30:26"She won't look pretty after having her head removed
0:30:26 > 0:30:27"by a rusty pen knife".
0:30:28 > 0:30:31"You trashy whore, and you should publically announce
0:30:31 > 0:30:33"that you are not a Muslim".
0:30:33 > 0:30:36"Stop disrespecting Islam by giving this image."
0:30:36 > 0:30:40"You are nothing but a whore and may the soul of your father burn
0:30:40 > 0:30:43"in the deepest pits of hell for allowing his daughter
0:30:43 > 0:30:45"to publicly shame Islam".
0:30:46 > 0:30:49"If you were a real Muslim, you would care more about
0:30:49 > 0:30:52"protecting the image of Islam that we fight to preserve."
0:30:53 > 0:30:55"Instead, you just take all your clothes off
0:30:55 > 0:30:58"and crave for personal attention."
0:30:58 > 0:31:01"You will burn in hell next to your father,
0:31:01 > 0:31:03"therefore you are just trash."
0:31:07 > 0:31:08I need a tissue, I think.
0:31:09 > 0:31:10This is bad.
0:31:12 > 0:31:16Forget that I'm Muslim or religion, Christianity or whatever,
0:31:16 > 0:31:18I'm a human being.
0:31:18 > 0:31:21If you say something mean about me, I'm going to get emotional.
0:31:21 > 0:31:23I've got feelings and emotions
0:31:23 > 0:31:25and I think some people kind of forget that.
0:31:32 > 0:31:35Shanna's back on the road again.
0:31:35 > 0:31:37There's a whole new issue she wants to find out about -
0:31:37 > 0:31:40what family life's like when you convert to Islam.
0:31:42 > 0:31:46Lisa married a Pakistani Muslim man seven years ago,
0:31:46 > 0:31:49but she only properly converted to Islam herself last year.
0:31:51 > 0:31:54Lisa lives in Reading. She's a full-time mum,
0:31:54 > 0:31:56and her work's cut out bringing up her three daughters.
0:31:59 > 0:32:01I've loaded the dishwasher, fed the cats.
0:32:01 > 0:32:03That's it, that's all done this morning,
0:32:03 > 0:32:06until we get back from school and then there's hoovering.
0:32:08 > 0:32:12She wears the hijab full-time, Ameera does. Wears it all the time.
0:32:12 > 0:32:14Ameera! It's ready.
0:32:19 > 0:32:21Sometimes it would be easier for them all to wear hijab,
0:32:21 > 0:32:24then we wouldn't have to worry about hair.
0:32:24 > 0:32:26Does it affect you, do you think, me wearing hijab?
0:32:26 > 0:32:28Affect me, how?
0:32:28 > 0:32:30Do you feel embarrassed or anything?
0:32:30 > 0:32:32No? That's good, then.
0:32:32 > 0:32:35No, cos all people are interesting.
0:32:35 > 0:32:38That's right. I taught you well, chick, didn't I?
0:32:38 > 0:32:39There you go, you're done.
0:32:39 > 0:32:43My nanny, she's the one, she looks older than that now,
0:32:43 > 0:32:45but she's the one who says about me,
0:32:45 > 0:32:48"Oh, that's the girl who wears the salami on her head".
0:32:50 > 0:32:53But she's got dementia so she hardly even remembers me,
0:32:53 > 0:32:56she just calls me the girl with the salami on her head.
0:32:57 > 0:32:59My mum calls me a nun on the run.
0:32:59 > 0:33:02My neighbour says "Here comes the old ninja." She calls me a ninja.
0:33:03 > 0:33:06But, yeah, they don't do it in a nasty way.
0:33:06 > 0:33:09It's all a bit of banter, cos they know I like the banter
0:33:09 > 0:33:11and I give the banter back.
0:33:15 > 0:33:18Come on, then, let's go for a walk in the woods!
0:33:18 > 0:33:21Lisa's made a big decision for the family this year.
0:33:21 > 0:33:24Instead of celebrating the traditional British holidays,
0:33:24 > 0:33:27they'll observe the Muslim festival, Eid.
0:33:28 > 0:33:30We're not having an English Christmas this year,
0:33:30 > 0:33:32so this is our very big Eid, for us.
0:33:33 > 0:33:36It's going to be kind of weird cos we've always celebrated Christmas.
0:33:36 > 0:33:38Cos I'm a Muslim, I don't want to celebrate Christmas.
0:33:38 > 0:33:40Cos it's not part of being a Muslim,
0:33:40 > 0:33:42it's not part of the religion.
0:33:42 > 0:33:45I believe that if we do a Christmas,
0:33:45 > 0:33:48then we're put in partnership with our God
0:33:48 > 0:33:51by celebrating something to do with another religion's God.
0:33:51 > 0:33:53So, yeah. That's why.
0:33:56 > 0:33:59Following Islamic festivals might be one big step,
0:33:59 > 0:34:02but there are other big decisions to be made.
0:34:05 > 0:34:08Lisa's going Islamic clothes shopping in London,
0:34:08 > 0:34:10and Shanna's coming to meet her,
0:34:10 > 0:34:13but it's the one sort of fashion she isn't familiar with.
0:34:13 > 0:34:15- Hi.- Hi, you all right?
0:34:15 > 0:34:18- I'm Shanna.- I'm Lisa. Nice to meet you.
0:34:19 > 0:34:23From bonnets to one-pieces, it's a whole new shopping lingo.
0:34:24 > 0:34:26I would not wear that.
0:34:29 > 0:34:31Lisa's decided to make a controversial step made
0:34:31 > 0:34:34by a minority of Muslim women.
0:34:34 > 0:34:37She wants to cover her face fully, and wear the niqab.
0:34:37 > 0:34:38How can you see through that?
0:34:38 > 0:34:41It's netted. I can see you.
0:34:41 > 0:34:43You can breathe through it. It's really thin.
0:34:43 > 0:34:45- How do you eat with that on? - Lift it up, and eat.
0:34:45 > 0:34:48Would you really wear that?
0:34:48 > 0:34:49Yes, without a doubt.
0:34:49 > 0:34:50- Every single day? - Every single day.
0:34:50 > 0:34:53Once you start wearing it, you can't wear it part-time.
0:34:53 > 0:34:55That's why it's a big decision. I like it.
0:34:55 > 0:34:58Do you not feel weird covering your face up?
0:34:58 > 0:35:01Keep it for my husband's eyes only.
0:35:01 > 0:35:04But Lisa's hasn't made the decision for her husband,
0:35:04 > 0:35:07she wants to do it as a sign of commitment to her faith.
0:35:07 > 0:35:09What would your husband think?
0:35:09 > 0:35:10He don't want me to wear one.
0:35:11 > 0:35:15Certain scholars believe it shows extra piety,
0:35:15 > 0:35:18but to some it can seem like a radical step.
0:35:18 > 0:35:21Do you think people look at you and think "extremist"?
0:35:21 > 0:35:23Yeah, cos they don't know who I am.
0:35:28 > 0:35:30Lisa was a bit of a bad girl before she converted,
0:35:30 > 0:35:33and Shana wants to find out what sort of life she left behind.
0:35:34 > 0:35:37Although tattoos are forbidden under Islam,
0:35:37 > 0:35:39they still remind her of her colourful past.
0:35:40 > 0:35:43I was looking at your hand. You've still got tattoos.
0:35:43 > 0:35:45Oh, I've got loads of tattoos. I've got loads of tattoos.
0:35:45 > 0:35:46How many have you got?
0:35:46 > 0:35:48I'm covered.
0:35:48 > 0:35:49Are you serious?
0:35:49 > 0:35:52- On my leg, and both my feet are done.- Let's have a look.
0:35:52 > 0:35:54Nanny, you love your nanny, don't you?
0:35:54 > 0:35:57That's my nanny that passed, my dad's mum.
0:35:57 > 0:36:00- But I know I got them before I was Muslim.- Yeah.
0:36:00 > 0:36:02What do you feel Islam has brought to you?
0:36:02 > 0:36:05It has definitely calmed me down.
0:36:05 > 0:36:09I was a wild thing, feisty. I used to fight.
0:36:09 > 0:36:11Literally?
0:36:11 > 0:36:14Argue in the street, you know.
0:36:14 > 0:36:17We used to walk through town, especially with my other sister,
0:36:17 > 0:36:22and if somebody would bump into us, we'd have a big row in the town.
0:36:22 > 0:36:24You know, I think I've changed quite a lot.
0:36:24 > 0:36:26- For the better?- Yeah, definitely.
0:36:27 > 0:36:32But Lisa has a very unusual family set-up that's allowed under Islam,
0:36:32 > 0:36:35but is shocking to most Westerners.
0:36:35 > 0:36:39All my friends know I'm a co-wife. I've never kept that from anybody.
0:36:39 > 0:36:42- You're a co-wife?- Yeah.
0:36:42 > 0:36:44It's just not right, a man being shared!
0:36:44 > 0:36:46- Anything's not right, but... - How did you meet?
0:36:46 > 0:36:49I met him in the park behind my mum's house, we used to hang
0:36:49 > 0:36:53about a lot there and then he'd come and then we fell in love, I suppose.
0:36:53 > 0:36:54How old were you?
0:36:54 > 0:36:57Fourteen. And we was like, love's young dream.
0:36:57 > 0:37:00Then his family made him marry her.
0:37:00 > 0:37:04When Lisa was 18, she found out her boyfriend had gone
0:37:04 > 0:37:07to Pakistan for an arranged marriage.
0:37:07 > 0:37:12Six years later, he married Lisa in an Islamic religious ceremony.
0:37:12 > 0:37:14Islam allows a man to have up to four wives
0:37:14 > 0:37:16so long as he treats them equally.
0:37:16 > 0:37:19So, with the co-wife, do you live in the same house?
0:37:19 > 0:37:21What, as his other wife? I'd kill her.
0:37:22 > 0:37:26We'd kill each other, actually, cos we don't like each other.
0:37:26 > 0:37:28So you wouldn't be able to tolerate that?
0:37:28 > 0:37:29Bed-hopping in the night!
0:37:29 > 0:37:31At least when he's there I can't see what he's doing
0:37:31 > 0:37:34and don't have to witness it for myself.
0:37:34 > 0:37:37Oh, doing it under the same roof, crap.
0:37:38 > 0:37:40I've set rules, though.
0:37:40 > 0:37:42I've told him I don't want him to have sex with her.
0:37:42 > 0:37:45He's got a choice. He has to choose. If he wants to have sex with her,
0:37:45 > 0:37:47then have sex with her, don't have sex with me.
0:37:47 > 0:37:50But I'm 30, I've decided to be in this situation.
0:37:50 > 0:37:51I'm in love with a man.
0:37:53 > 0:37:55Lisa has had difficulty being accepted
0:37:55 > 0:37:59by the born Muslim community, and this has caused her trouble at home.
0:38:01 > 0:38:04I don't have nothing to do with his family at all.
0:38:04 > 0:38:05Nothing at all?
0:38:05 > 0:38:06Nope.
0:38:06 > 0:38:09Nothing at all. Cos I'm white, I'm English.
0:38:09 > 0:38:12It doesn't matter that I'm Muslim, I could be black and Muslim,
0:38:12 > 0:38:15they still wouldn't accept me cos I'm not Pakistani.
0:38:15 > 0:38:17- Even though you've converted? - Yeah.
0:38:19 > 0:38:2016 years together,
0:38:20 > 0:38:23and I've never once sat in a room with his mum or dad.
0:38:24 > 0:38:28Lisa's closest friend is her sister, Kimberley.
0:38:28 > 0:38:29As a British girl,
0:38:29 > 0:38:33it makes her angry to see her sister be a second wife.
0:38:33 > 0:38:35When we was younger, she was crying in the bedroom cos he'd gone
0:38:35 > 0:38:40and got married, but she still accepted it.
0:38:40 > 0:38:43She's still gone and accepted it now, so it's really quite
0:38:43 > 0:38:47frustrating sometimes, like, that she's actually putting up with it.
0:38:48 > 0:38:49I couldn't do that.
0:38:49 > 0:38:53She's a strong Muslim woman, so she shouldn't have to be,
0:38:53 > 0:38:55like, the second best.
0:38:56 > 0:39:00She should be the best and the only. That's the way that life is.
0:39:00 > 0:39:02I think she puts on a really strong face
0:39:02 > 0:39:06like it doesn't really bother her, but it does.
0:39:06 > 0:39:07It does.
0:39:08 > 0:39:10Because she's having to...
0:39:10 > 0:39:12half the week, live like a single parent.
0:39:14 > 0:39:17I don't think a man should be allowed to marry two women
0:39:17 > 0:39:19and live two separate lives like that.
0:39:19 > 0:39:22It's not fair on children. They're confused.
0:39:26 > 0:39:29Oh, my God. She's a co-wife. It's crazy.
0:39:31 > 0:39:33and she, the co-wife,
0:39:33 > 0:39:36the other wife lives down the road, and she's accepted that.
0:39:36 > 0:39:42It's in Pakistani Muslim culture that a man can marry up to four times.
0:39:42 > 0:39:46I would literally kill my husband if he ever even thought about
0:39:46 > 0:39:48the idea of being...
0:39:48 > 0:39:49Oh, no, it just makes me sick.
0:39:49 > 0:39:53Come on, you have got to be one hell of a strong woman to take that.
0:39:57 > 0:40:01Shanna's learning there are real obstacles to overcome for converts.
0:40:01 > 0:40:03Next she's going up north to meet Inaya,
0:40:03 > 0:40:06who's has a totally different struggle.
0:40:06 > 0:40:08She can't find a Muslim husband at all.
0:40:13 > 0:40:17She splits her time between working in a busy call centre in Accrington
0:40:17 > 0:40:19and her full social life with friends.
0:40:21 > 0:40:23She converted to Islam four years ago
0:40:23 > 0:40:25after going through a difficult time.
0:40:26 > 0:40:29I've always been interested in Islam from an early age
0:40:29 > 0:40:31from being at high school.
0:40:31 > 0:40:33I've had loads of Muslim friends.
0:40:33 > 0:40:36When I got to about 21, 22,
0:40:36 > 0:40:39I were going through a really rough patch at home,
0:40:39 > 0:40:42so I decided to turn to Islam.
0:40:44 > 0:40:48I literally woke up one day thinking "I need to do this before I die.
0:40:48 > 0:40:50"I need to do it, because if I die and I'm not a Muslim,
0:40:50 > 0:40:54"I'm not going to be happy" or, you know.
0:40:54 > 0:40:59I wanted to go to Paradise, so I wanted to do it.
0:40:59 > 0:41:01Hello, how can I help with your account?
0:41:02 > 0:41:05When I took my shahada, the weight just, I'm not joking,
0:41:05 > 0:41:07it tingles me now just thinking about it,
0:41:07 > 0:41:11but the weight just got took off my shoulders like I can't explain.
0:41:14 > 0:41:16Inaya lives in Haslingden,
0:41:16 > 0:41:20a small town in Lancashire Shanna knows well from her childhood.
0:41:22 > 0:41:24- Haslingden. Been here before. - Have you?
0:41:24 > 0:41:27- Yeah, I went to school here. - No.
0:41:27 > 0:41:28Yeah, Haslingden High School.
0:41:28 > 0:41:30Oh, me too!
0:41:30 > 0:41:33Oh, my God! What year were you?
0:41:33 > 0:41:34I'm 28.
0:41:34 > 0:41:36So you're two years older than me.
0:41:36 > 0:41:39It's definitely the same. Nothing has changed here.
0:41:41 > 0:41:44For Inaya, it's hard to meet a prospective Muslim partner
0:41:44 > 0:41:46when she lives in a remote northern town.
0:41:49 > 0:41:52I would like to just bump into, you know,
0:41:52 > 0:41:55"Oh, sorry, I've seen you in the shopping centre."
0:41:55 > 0:41:57Like, literally just walk into someone,
0:41:57 > 0:41:59that would be my ideal way of meeting someone.
0:41:59 > 0:42:01But it doesn't work like that, does it?
0:42:01 > 0:42:05Many Muslims have marriages arranged by their family,
0:42:05 > 0:42:08but without relatives to help, Inaya's had to resort
0:42:08 > 0:42:13to more ingenious ways to find a husband - Muslim speed dating!
0:42:13 > 0:42:16You've got this massive audience of parents.
0:42:16 > 0:42:18Oh, no, watching you.
0:42:18 > 0:42:20Yeah, so I'm like, sat here and I'm, like, trying.
0:42:20 > 0:42:21You're nervous as it is.
0:42:21 > 0:42:23Yeah, and I'm trying to talk to this guy in front
0:42:23 > 0:42:25and the parents are in there somewhere.
0:42:25 > 0:42:27Are they the guy's parents?
0:42:27 > 0:42:30Yeah. Everyone's parents are standing there watching,
0:42:30 > 0:42:32I'm like, oh, no.
0:42:32 > 0:42:34So, it's pressure from there and then.
0:42:36 > 0:42:39And like, I had guys coming to talk to me who later on,
0:42:39 > 0:42:42I started talking to them, and then they'd come round with
0:42:42 > 0:42:47barriers like, my mum doesn't want me to, you know, talk to you.
0:42:47 > 0:42:48Don't talk to you? Why?
0:42:48 > 0:42:52Because they come up with silly excuses that I'm too old,
0:42:52 > 0:42:56I'm too tall, I'm going to back to how I used to be, you know.
0:42:56 > 0:42:57- What sort of rubbish is that? - Yeah.
0:42:58 > 0:43:02Inaya's best friends have stuck with her every step of the way,
0:43:02 > 0:43:06through conversion, and now through the search to find a husband.
0:43:06 > 0:43:09My friends, they've really been supportive.
0:43:09 > 0:43:11When I started wearing the head scarf it was a shock,
0:43:11 > 0:43:14but they've got used to me wearing the scarf
0:43:14 > 0:43:17and they don't even see the scarf anymore.
0:43:17 > 0:43:19But then when I take it off, they're like,
0:43:19 > 0:43:23"Wow, I've not seen your hair for a year!"
0:43:23 > 0:43:25So, they appreciate it and that's when I say
0:43:25 > 0:43:27"That's why I cover it up".
0:43:28 > 0:43:33The moment Inaya converted to Islam, the dating rules changed.
0:43:33 > 0:43:36She couldn't go out to bars serving alcohol, or meet with guys alone.
0:43:37 > 0:43:41Shanna's curious to find out what her new tactics are.
0:43:41 > 0:43:44This is where I go browsing for men.
0:43:47 > 0:43:49So this is how they see it.
0:43:49 > 0:43:50OK.
0:43:50 > 0:43:52There's me at a wedding.
0:43:52 > 0:43:55You look so pretty, you look stunning.
0:43:55 > 0:43:56Seriously.
0:43:58 > 0:43:59Oh, God!
0:44:01 > 0:44:05I've met people off here, but then you obviously study the profile
0:44:05 > 0:44:08and they say they're 5' 11", a really good height for myself,
0:44:08 > 0:44:10and you turn up and they're 5' 3".
0:44:10 > 0:44:12Oh, my God.
0:44:12 > 0:44:13Oh, that's happened!
0:44:13 > 0:44:14So they lie?
0:44:14 > 0:44:15Yeah, yeah.
0:44:15 > 0:44:18And the photos don't even, they don't even look the same
0:44:18 > 0:44:19when they show up!
0:44:19 > 0:44:21Totally different picture?
0:44:21 > 0:44:23Totally.
0:44:23 > 0:44:25Inaya's encountered many problems.
0:44:25 > 0:44:28Often the guys just want to have fun
0:44:28 > 0:44:30and aren't serious enough about marriage.
0:44:30 > 0:44:32Obviously, we're not allowed to date.
0:44:32 > 0:44:34If I am alone with a guy, things could happen
0:44:34 > 0:44:36when it shouldn't happen.
0:44:36 > 0:44:39He wants dating, whereas I don't.
0:44:39 > 0:44:40He's put non-religious.
0:44:40 > 0:44:41And he's a Muslim?
0:44:41 > 0:44:42Well, I'm assuming so.
0:44:42 > 0:44:44Yeah, he is. Surname.
0:44:44 > 0:44:47If they can't tell people on here that they're Muslim,
0:44:47 > 0:44:49they're not going to be telling people outside that they're Muslim.
0:44:49 > 0:44:51Yeah.
0:44:51 > 0:44:53Even if she finds someone who's devout,
0:44:53 > 0:44:56their families might have different plans for their sons.
0:44:56 > 0:44:58They might already have someone in mind
0:44:58 > 0:45:01for the son or daughter to get married to.
0:45:01 > 0:45:03Or they want their new daughter-in-law
0:45:03 > 0:45:05to live with the parents.
0:45:05 > 0:45:10I don't mind doing that for a short period of time,
0:45:10 > 0:45:13but I'm not willing to live with the parents forever.
0:45:13 > 0:45:16I don't know how converts get married, I really don't.
0:45:17 > 0:45:21It's so hard and I can't tell you how much pain it's caused me.
0:45:21 > 0:45:23Even my mum's turned round and said,
0:45:23 > 0:45:26"Does that mean you're never going to get married?"
0:45:26 > 0:45:29Shanna's surprised Inaya's found it hard to adapt
0:45:29 > 0:45:34to the marriage customs of the traditional Muslim community.
0:45:34 > 0:45:35Hiya, you all right?
0:45:35 > 0:45:38Inaya is having massive difficulty finding a husband,
0:45:38 > 0:45:41and I didn't ever think that would be a problem.
0:45:41 > 0:45:45And she's only having this difficulty cos she's converted.
0:45:45 > 0:45:48Otherwise she could just find anyone she wants.
0:45:48 > 0:45:51How it would work normally for Muslims is we help each other,
0:45:51 > 0:45:57we introduce each other to each other's families and word of mouth.
0:45:57 > 0:46:00She hasn't got that, she's just totally on her own.
0:46:00 > 0:46:01Thank you. Bye-bye.
0:46:07 > 0:46:10Learning about the difficulties converts face
0:46:10 > 0:46:14has made Shanna reflect on her own conflicts with her religion.
0:46:14 > 0:46:17I'm questioning what I can do, can I do modelling?
0:46:17 > 0:46:21If I can, what kind of modelling? That has come to my attention.
0:46:21 > 0:46:24It's not like you've seen me on the Nuts magazine or something,
0:46:24 > 0:46:27or an FHM or something, no!
0:46:31 > 0:46:34Shanna's come to Edinburgh hoping to find answers
0:46:34 > 0:46:37for her questions about her modelling career.
0:46:38 > 0:46:41She wants to meet a convert who's more like her,
0:46:41 > 0:46:43a modern British Muslim.
0:46:43 > 0:46:47I'm going to meet a convert who's a model.
0:46:47 > 0:46:49Maybe she has the answers that I don't have.
0:46:50 > 0:46:53Maybe she can back it up - you can be a model and a Muslim.
0:46:54 > 0:46:57Maybe she can relate to me, cos we're just the same.
0:47:02 > 0:47:05Ayesha's an internationally successful model,
0:47:05 > 0:47:09and today she's working on some of her own fashion designs.
0:47:09 > 0:47:12She's appeared on catwalks form New York to Paris,
0:47:12 > 0:47:15and she's worked for leading brands Top Shop and Mulberry.
0:47:17 > 0:47:20She grew up on a deprived council estate in Edinburgh,
0:47:20 > 0:47:25but at 16 she was scouted by a model agency, and she shot to stardom.
0:47:27 > 0:47:30She converted to Islam four years ago,
0:47:30 > 0:47:33but has she found it hard to combine modelling with her faith?
0:47:35 > 0:47:36I've had a bit of a struggle.
0:47:38 > 0:47:41Do you find that you have that struggle?
0:47:41 > 0:47:43Can you be a Muslim and a model?
0:47:43 > 0:47:46When I first got into Islam, I stopped everything.
0:47:46 > 0:47:50All fashion, anything that was even, yeah.
0:47:50 > 0:47:51You stopped all fashion?
0:47:51 > 0:47:53Yeah, I changed, I totally was covering,
0:47:53 > 0:47:57I was probably a bit too extreme.
0:47:57 > 0:48:00Although Ayesha knows catwalk modelling's controversial
0:48:00 > 0:48:03if you're a Muslim, she's justified it to herself.
0:48:03 > 0:48:08It all comes back to what you're wearing and your intention.
0:48:08 > 0:48:12So if I'm on a catwalk and I'm wearing a dress
0:48:12 > 0:48:14and I've, like, beautified my appearance
0:48:14 > 0:48:17and stuff like that.
0:48:17 > 0:48:20I think there's a big difference in me walking down a catwalk
0:48:20 > 0:48:23dressed like that and me walking down the street dressed like that.
0:48:23 > 0:48:25- Yeah.- Cos what is my intention?
0:48:25 > 0:48:28Well, my intention is to show these clothes in this makeup
0:48:28 > 0:48:31to people who want to buy it for their shop, whereas if you're
0:48:31 > 0:48:35making yourself really beautiful and walking down the street, then that's
0:48:35 > 0:48:36a different intention.
0:48:36 > 0:48:38- It's not like you're doing it out of necessity.- Yeah.
0:48:38 > 0:48:40Do you know what I mean?
0:48:40 > 0:48:44Ayesha's managed to reconcile modelling with her faith,
0:48:44 > 0:48:47but she's had to make tough decisions about the work she does.
0:48:47 > 0:48:50I try not make stuff that I wouldn't wear.
0:48:50 > 0:48:51- Yeah.- You know?
0:48:51 > 0:48:53Like, I never do bikini or underwear,
0:48:53 > 0:48:55but I did make a pair of shorts
0:48:55 > 0:48:58and I was having this dilemma, like, oh, my God, these are shorts.
0:48:58 > 0:48:59I can't wear shorts!
0:49:03 > 0:49:05How tall are you without boots?
0:49:05 > 0:49:06Quite tall, just under 5' 9".
0:49:11 > 0:49:13I feel a bit like Laurel and Hardy.
0:49:13 > 0:49:16It actually suits you!
0:49:16 > 0:49:18Man, that looks crazy on me!
0:49:21 > 0:49:22You look good in that.
0:49:22 > 0:49:25Oh, behave, you can't see my face!
0:49:25 > 0:49:29I always had this stupid, silly perception that Muslim converts
0:49:29 > 0:49:31are just strict, they're just like...
0:49:33 > 0:49:36I didn't think they could be so fun to be with.
0:49:36 > 0:49:37Oh, that's so cute.
0:49:39 > 0:49:43It might seem like Ayesha's answered Shanna's questions,
0:49:43 > 0:49:44but she isn't convinced.
0:49:46 > 0:49:49Ayesha, she was a really, really lovely person.
0:49:50 > 0:49:54I was really shocked when I saw her, like the way she was.
0:49:54 > 0:49:59She was just so cool, down to earth, so totally into fashion.
0:50:00 > 0:50:02I really thought I would have answers from Ayesha, but no.
0:50:03 > 0:50:07I think I need to ask those questions, I need a stronger answer.
0:50:08 > 0:50:11Shanna's made a brave decision.
0:50:11 > 0:50:15Of all the people she wants to ask a second opinion from, it's Alana,
0:50:15 > 0:50:18the convert who was most critical of her dress.
0:50:18 > 0:50:21I can't live without my heels. That's something I couldn't sacrifice.
0:50:21 > 0:50:24Well, you wear your heels, and you just go lower and lower and lower.
0:50:24 > 0:50:26Take them un-halal boots off!
0:50:29 > 0:50:31What do you think of me being a model?
0:50:34 > 0:50:35Oh, God, that laugh!
0:50:37 > 0:50:38Honestly.
0:50:40 > 0:50:43As a Muslim,
0:50:44 > 0:50:48if you're a practicing Muslim, then I do think that
0:50:48 > 0:50:51you shouldn't be doing it,
0:50:51 > 0:50:54because the whole point of that is that you're "look at me",
0:50:54 > 0:50:57it's defeating the purpose, do you know what I mean? It's not...
0:50:57 > 0:51:01But what is it, like it's your intentions right, that's just a job?
0:51:01 > 0:51:04You're still showing your body, showing what you look like
0:51:04 > 0:51:06Even though you may have good intentions,
0:51:06 > 0:51:08you're still doing it for people to look at you,
0:51:08 > 0:51:09do you know what I mean?
0:51:09 > 0:51:12To walk out the door to show off how beautiful you are.
0:51:12 > 0:51:14That's the whole point of wearing the hijab.
0:51:17 > 0:51:20What Alana's told Shanna raises the question
0:51:20 > 0:51:23about whether she can be a model at all.
0:51:23 > 0:51:26Many young women feel it's their right to wear what they want,
0:51:26 > 0:51:29but Islam teaches that a woman should protect her modesty,
0:51:29 > 0:51:32and her beauty should be kept for her husband's eyes only.
0:51:34 > 0:51:38Shanna's getting ready to go to Ayesha's fashion show.
0:51:38 > 0:51:40It would normally be her ideal night out.
0:51:41 > 0:51:44Hello! How are you?
0:51:44 > 0:51:46It's just going to be a little show,
0:51:46 > 0:51:49a little preview of the spring/summer selection.
0:51:50 > 0:51:52Just hang out and have a nice time.
0:51:54 > 0:51:57But Shanna's journey's coming to an end,
0:51:57 > 0:51:59and after everything she's learnt,
0:51:59 > 0:52:02she's wondering how far she's prepared to go for her faith.
0:52:04 > 0:52:05I kind of feel really weird.
0:52:07 > 0:52:11Like, I was just thinking about talking to Alana about fashion
0:52:11 > 0:52:15and then I'm at this fashion show where there's short dresses,
0:52:15 > 0:52:17there's make up, glamour,
0:52:17 > 0:52:21and Alana's like, "You shouldn't be doing this".
0:52:21 > 0:52:24And it's like I'm just doing the total opposite of what she's saying
0:52:24 > 0:52:27about making yourself better and being a good Muslim.
0:52:29 > 0:52:31So, yeah, it just felt all weird.
0:52:32 > 0:52:35I feel a bit, I feel a bit lost.
0:52:41 > 0:52:44Shanna's come to some important realisations
0:52:44 > 0:52:47about what Islam means to her.
0:52:47 > 0:52:50After seeing the converts bettering themselves
0:52:50 > 0:52:53and following a total new faith and new religion
0:52:53 > 0:52:57it's made me realise that, well, it's my religion, why am I not doing it?
0:52:59 > 0:53:03It kind of just woke me up to what my faith is and what it means to me.
0:53:05 > 0:53:08I believe in Allah, I believe in my religion.
0:53:09 > 0:53:14I think changes are going to change in my life, slowly, very slowly.
0:53:14 > 0:53:15I thought about wearing a headscarf,
0:53:15 > 0:53:18I don't think I'd ever wear a headscarf.
0:53:18 > 0:53:21I'm still going to be modern.
0:53:21 > 0:53:24I love this western culture, this society I live in.
0:53:24 > 0:53:27I'm British, I live here, it's who I am.
0:53:28 > 0:53:31What do these insights mean for her career?
0:53:31 > 0:53:35Since she was a child all she's ever dreamed of is being a model.
0:53:35 > 0:53:38That doesn't mean that's it, end of my modelling career.
0:53:38 > 0:53:41I think it's just where I'm going to be more selective
0:53:41 > 0:53:44to what work I'm doing.
0:53:44 > 0:53:47And rather than just letting a designer say, "Oh, put this on"
0:53:47 > 0:53:50and walk on the catwalk, it's not going to be that case,
0:53:50 > 0:53:51it's going to be like
0:53:51 > 0:53:55"I'm not going to wear that cos I don't think I look modest in that."
0:53:57 > 0:54:01Shanna's decided to call Alana with a surprising request.
0:54:03 > 0:54:06I was thinking a lot about what we talked about,
0:54:08 > 0:54:11and it, kind of, all made so much sense and stuff
0:54:11 > 0:54:13and it made me think about things,
0:54:14 > 0:54:18and I thought, maybe, sometime, when you are free,
0:54:18 > 0:54:21we could go to the mosque and pray some time.
0:54:22 > 0:54:24'OK.'
0:54:32 > 0:54:36It's Friday prayers at Glasgow Central, and the mosque is packed.
0:54:40 > 0:54:42It's the end of Shanna's journey,
0:54:42 > 0:54:46and it'll be the first time she's ever prayed in a mosque.
0:54:46 > 0:54:49You're going to have to do this for me.
0:54:49 > 0:54:52I'm going to have to halal-ify you again.
0:54:52 > 0:54:56A convert is making me something I kind of already should be,
0:54:56 > 0:54:58if you know what I mean?
0:54:58 > 0:54:59OK, are you ready?
0:54:59 > 0:55:01Yeah.
0:55:01 > 0:55:03Hijabified? OK, let's go.
0:55:06 > 0:55:08Can you speak out loud?
0:55:08 > 0:55:11My Arabic's not great.
0:55:11 > 0:55:12Mine's not good either.
0:55:12 > 0:55:15OK, so, this is just the way I've learnt it.
0:55:15 > 0:55:17So, you start with the Adhan.
0:55:17 > 0:55:18Do you keep your eyes..?
0:55:18 > 0:55:20You need to keep your eyes open.
0:55:20 > 0:55:22- OK.- Yeah?
0:55:22 > 0:55:24Mm-hmm. And straight down?
0:55:24 > 0:55:25Instead of ahead?
0:55:25 > 0:55:27- Yeah.- OK.
0:55:28 > 0:55:33THEY PRAY IN ARABIC
0:55:33 > 0:55:35Shanna's surprised by what she's learnt
0:55:35 > 0:55:38about the reasons why girls convert to Islam.
0:55:38 > 0:55:41Now, as I've met the converts,
0:55:41 > 0:55:43I've understood how they've got this structure,
0:55:43 > 0:55:45they follow these guidelines
0:55:45 > 0:55:47and they've found peace within themselves.
0:55:49 > 0:55:54I always imagined that converts just convert because they've found
0:55:54 > 0:55:56a Muslim partner and they have to.
0:55:56 > 0:55:58I didn't think they want to.
0:56:00 > 0:56:03The hijab means "I am a Muslim, accept me for who I am now".
0:56:04 > 0:56:07I feel the converts have just given up drinking, going out
0:56:07 > 0:56:10and that lifestyle they had before because they've found a faith
0:56:10 > 0:56:13and they don't need that in their lives anymore.
0:56:13 > 0:56:16Ultimately, she's learnt a lot about herself.
0:56:16 > 0:56:20Looking back at, and reflecting on being in Miss Universe,
0:56:20 > 0:56:22and what it says in the Qur'an, I can't change that,
0:56:22 > 0:56:25and it does say a woman should be dressed in modesty.
0:56:25 > 0:56:27Yeah, I shouldn't have done those things,
0:56:27 > 0:56:31and all I can do is try making myself a better Muslim.
0:56:54 > 0:56:57Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd