Episode 1

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0:00:02 > 0:00:03More tea, vicar. Yeah, go on, then.

0:00:03 > 0:00:06Vicars - pillars of the community...

0:00:06 > 0:00:07Are we high enough yet?

0:00:07 > 0:00:11..as English as tea and cake, and cricket on the village green.

0:00:11 > 0:00:14Nice to see you, to see you...

0:00:14 > 0:00:15- ALL:- Nice!

0:00:15 > 0:00:16But times are changing.

0:00:16 > 0:00:19- Would you like to pray now? Would you find that helpful?- No.

0:00:19 > 0:00:24Congregations are ageing and faith is fading.

0:00:24 > 0:00:26People in this country do not go to church.

0:00:26 > 0:00:30So today's vicars are working hard to stay relevant.

0:00:30 > 0:00:32The safeguards that are in place

0:00:32 > 0:00:35are not catching people who are in desperate need.

0:00:35 > 0:00:38In this series, vicars from Hereford,

0:00:38 > 0:00:41the Church of England's most rural diocese,

0:00:41 > 0:00:43let us into their life and work...

0:00:43 > 0:00:47Whoever did this has got lessons that they need to learn.

0:00:47 > 0:00:50..being there when people need them most...

0:00:50 > 0:00:52Hello, Barbara.

0:00:52 > 0:00:55..and guiding them through rites of passage.

0:00:56 > 0:00:59It's all part of A Vicar's Life.

0:01:05 > 0:01:09Hereford diocese straddles the Welsh border.

0:01:09 > 0:01:13At its northern end lies the small town of Much Wenlock.

0:01:13 > 0:01:15Since the eighth century,

0:01:15 > 0:01:18the Church and its vicar have been at the heart of the community.

0:01:19 > 0:01:23But there's never been a vicar here quite like the current incumbent,

0:01:23 > 0:01:24Matthew Stafford.

0:01:26 > 0:01:28There is a competition within family and friends,

0:01:28 > 0:01:31who can find me the most religious tat.

0:01:31 > 0:01:34I've got the Cheesus Christ cheese grater...

0:01:35 > 0:01:39..and then, obviously, this is really classy,

0:01:39 > 0:01:41this is an inflatable Jesus.

0:01:41 > 0:01:44A solar-panelled Pope Benedict.

0:01:44 > 0:01:47Oh, that needs a dust. And solar-panelled Jesus.

0:01:47 > 0:01:50I hope it doesn't cause any offence to anyone,

0:01:50 > 0:01:51but they jiggle and dance.

0:01:54 > 0:01:56Me and the kids laugh at you...

0:01:56 > 0:01:59Matthew's wife, Julie, and their two teenage sons

0:01:59 > 0:02:00are used to his eccentricities.

0:02:02 > 0:02:03He's become more normal.

0:02:05 > 0:02:09Obviously, being with a Scouser for 20-odd years, it kind of rubs off.

0:02:09 > 0:02:13He's approachable, compassionate and passionate about his job.

0:02:15 > 0:02:18The lovely thing about the priestly life,

0:02:18 > 0:02:22it's so varied, that no two days are the same,

0:02:22 > 0:02:25but from a Church of England perspective,

0:02:25 > 0:02:29the bread and butter of ministry

0:02:29 > 0:02:32is the hatch, the match and dispatch,

0:02:32 > 0:02:34the births, the marriages and the deaths.

0:02:35 > 0:02:39They give us an opportunity to have that unique and personal encounter

0:02:39 > 0:02:42with people who have, maybe, little or no church contact.

0:02:45 > 0:02:48And fitting that brief, are hairdresser Mel...

0:02:49 > 0:02:50..and fireman Stu.

0:02:51 > 0:02:54Both locally born and bred,

0:02:54 > 0:02:57Matthew has persuaded them to shun the registry office

0:02:57 > 0:02:59in favour of a church wedding.

0:02:59 > 0:03:02We're only getting married in the church because of Matthew

0:03:02 > 0:03:05and I know my wedding wouldn't be the same

0:03:05 > 0:03:07if it was any other vicar.

0:03:07 > 0:03:11He just makes church very now, very today.

0:03:13 > 0:03:14Yeah, I'm excited, really,

0:03:14 > 0:03:17because it's nice to get the family together and have a nice time.

0:03:17 > 0:03:19We like getting dressed up.

0:03:19 > 0:03:22How are you? Make sure you do the crossword.

0:03:22 > 0:03:24Matthew will be dressing up, too,

0:03:24 > 0:03:28in a surprise vicar's shirt made especially for the wedding.

0:03:29 > 0:03:32He's having something made, I don't know what,

0:03:32 > 0:03:34he won't let me know anything!

0:03:34 > 0:03:35God knows what he's up to.

0:03:36 > 0:03:38He does, actually. He is a vicar.

0:03:38 > 0:03:40Yeah, yeah, exactly!

0:03:44 > 0:03:47Matthew has arranged a wedding rehearsal

0:03:47 > 0:03:49for the bride and groom to be.

0:03:49 > 0:03:51- Morning.- Good morning, Matthew.

0:03:51 > 0:03:53- You OK?- Yes, thank you.

0:03:53 > 0:03:55So are we definitely on for half past six,

0:03:55 > 0:03:57seven o'clock on the 14th August?

0:03:57 > 0:03:59- We are.- Yeah?

0:03:59 > 0:04:02Are you going to have the 60-minute guide to marital bliss

0:04:02 > 0:04:05from the mad vicar beforehand or afterwards?

0:04:05 > 0:04:07Shall we do it after?

0:04:07 > 0:04:14And Brendan is busy, as we speak, surprising you with my fancy shirt.

0:04:14 > 0:04:15Fabulous.

0:04:15 > 0:04:17I promise you that, obviously,

0:04:17 > 0:04:18the bride will still look better than me.

0:04:18 > 0:04:20Yeah, don't upstage me.

0:04:20 > 0:04:22No, I would never do that to you Mel, ever.

0:04:22 > 0:04:24- Ever.- Don't upstage me!- Have faith.

0:04:24 > 0:04:26- See you soon.- Bye for now.- Bye.

0:04:31 > 0:04:35At the western end of the diocese is the Black Mountains group

0:04:35 > 0:04:38of parishes near the Welsh border.

0:04:38 > 0:04:42Here, the Reverend Nicholas Lowton lives with his two spaniels...

0:04:42 > 0:04:43Not that way!

0:04:43 > 0:04:45..Pelham and Canning.

0:04:47 > 0:04:48Before I was here,

0:04:48 > 0:04:52I was assistant chaplain in a school,

0:04:52 > 0:04:56and being a chaplain is actually very different work

0:04:56 > 0:04:59from being a parish priest.

0:05:00 > 0:05:04And being a rural parish priest

0:05:04 > 0:05:07is very different from being an urban parish priest.

0:05:07 > 0:05:10If you're working in a big town and something happens,

0:05:10 > 0:05:12you might not know about it.

0:05:12 > 0:05:16In an area like this, you do know, because everybody knows each other.

0:05:19 > 0:05:23With 1,300 parishioners spread over 40 square miles,

0:05:23 > 0:05:29Nicholas has the most rural patch of England's most rural diocese.

0:05:29 > 0:05:31But it seems he's known by everyone.

0:05:31 > 0:05:33What job have you got for me?

0:05:33 > 0:05:35I thought it was time you showed off your baking talents.

0:05:35 > 0:05:36- You reckon?- Yes!- You reckon,

0:05:36 > 0:05:39you think the world is ready for my boiled fruitcake?

0:05:39 > 0:05:41I am challenging every man, come on!

0:05:44 > 0:05:47It might look like God's own country,

0:05:47 > 0:05:52but Nicolas's six churches aren't held sacred by everyone.

0:05:52 > 0:05:54They've broken all this off here as well.

0:05:54 > 0:05:56One of them, Clodock, has been broken into.

0:05:58 > 0:06:01The thieves made off with this heavy iron chest,

0:06:01 > 0:06:04but all they found inside were old record books,

0:06:04 > 0:06:06which they abandoned in a soggy field.

0:06:08 > 0:06:10Luckily, they've now been returned.

0:06:10 > 0:06:13PCSO Fiona Witcher is on the scene.

0:06:14 > 0:06:17First of all, they kicked in this, here.

0:06:17 > 0:06:20- Oh.- And you can see they tried there.

0:06:20 > 0:06:22- Yeah.- Then they came in here...

0:06:24 > 0:06:26..and they kicked that panel in.

0:06:26 > 0:06:27Oh, I see.

0:06:31 > 0:06:33There we go.

0:06:33 > 0:06:35They must have been so disappointed when they jimmied it open and...

0:06:35 > 0:06:37They found that.

0:06:37 > 0:06:39..there were just a load of books in there.

0:06:41 > 0:06:43In a recent survey,

0:06:43 > 0:06:50over a third of listed English churches reported criminal damage.

0:06:50 > 0:06:53The books stolen from Clodock were marriage and burial records

0:06:53 > 0:06:55dating back to the 19th century.

0:06:57 > 0:07:01They were worthless to the thieves, but priceless to the community.

0:07:03 > 0:07:06I mean, the burials one is obviously important

0:07:06 > 0:07:09because people do like to come back to a place

0:07:09 > 0:07:12and to see where their nearest and dearest were buried.

0:07:15 > 0:07:18The return of the record books is a relief,

0:07:18 > 0:07:21but they're badly damaged and will need restoration.

0:07:21 > 0:07:25The last example, in my book, of divine intervention

0:07:25 > 0:07:28was in the life, death and resurrection of Christ.

0:07:30 > 0:07:33It's then up for us to learn from that,

0:07:33 > 0:07:36and, clearly, whoever did this has got lessons

0:07:36 > 0:07:37that they need to learn.

0:07:43 > 0:07:47The city of Hereford lies at the centre of the diocese.

0:07:47 > 0:07:51Its Cathedral has dominated the skyline since the 12th century.

0:07:53 > 0:07:56On the outskirts is Holy Trinity Church.

0:07:56 > 0:08:02Its vicarage is home for school teacher John, 11-year-old David,

0:08:02 > 0:08:06three-year-old James, and, of course, the vicar herself...

0:08:06 > 0:08:08How hungry are you, Dave?

0:08:08 > 0:08:09..Ruth.

0:08:09 > 0:08:13James has never known me be anything else than a vicar,

0:08:13 > 0:08:15and so I think it's just to him,

0:08:15 > 0:08:18it's just what happens, that's what Mum does.

0:08:18 > 0:08:21David has just gone to secondary school,

0:08:21 > 0:08:22and for the first time,

0:08:22 > 0:08:25he's asked me not to wear a collar to pick him up.

0:08:25 > 0:08:26Which is fine.

0:08:26 > 0:08:28James, are you going to say grace?

0:08:28 > 0:08:31Dear Jesus, thank you for our food.

0:08:31 > 0:08:33Amen.

0:08:33 > 0:08:34Amen. Dig in.

0:08:36 > 0:08:38I'm not your average vicar's wife.

0:08:38 > 0:08:42I don't wear hats, I don't do coffee mornings.

0:08:42 > 0:08:44It makes for an interesting life, you know,

0:08:44 > 0:08:46we never lack for things to talk about.

0:08:47 > 0:08:50There is no one day that is the same as another.

0:08:50 > 0:08:54For example, this morning I came out of a staff meeting,

0:08:54 > 0:08:58only to find that a very dear member of the congregation had died,

0:08:58 > 0:09:03and so you never quite know what you're going to face.

0:09:07 > 0:09:09Helping people to face the end of life

0:09:09 > 0:09:12is one of the most challenging aspects of Ruth's ministry.

0:09:14 > 0:09:18In Hereford Hospice, her church warden, Barbara,

0:09:18 > 0:09:20is terminally ill with cancer.

0:09:22 > 0:09:24With only weeks to live,

0:09:24 > 0:09:26her thoughts have turned to her funeral service.

0:09:30 > 0:09:34I don't want it to be all doom and gloom, you know.

0:09:34 > 0:09:37I have planned it with funeral...

0:09:38 > 0:09:41..music, if you like, the hymns.

0:09:41 > 0:09:44But, hopefully, they're not dreary ones.

0:09:47 > 0:09:51Barbara has been at the hospice for six months,

0:09:51 > 0:09:53and Ruth spends time with her every week.

0:09:57 > 0:09:59Hi, Barbara.

0:09:59 > 0:10:01Hi, Ruth. How nice to see you.

0:10:01 > 0:10:05- How are you?- Today, she is joined by trainee Clark.

0:10:06 > 0:10:09Lovely to see you. I've brought Clark again with me.

0:10:09 > 0:10:12- Hello, Clark.- Do you remember Clark? - Yes, I do remember Clark.

0:10:12 > 0:10:15- Yeah?- Clark is your bag carrier, is he?

0:10:15 > 0:10:17Amongst other things, many, many other things.

0:10:20 > 0:10:22I was trying to think in the car on the way up

0:10:22 > 0:10:23what's happened in the last week.

0:10:23 > 0:10:24What gossip, what?

0:10:24 > 0:10:27We don't gossip, Barbara, we have news, we don't gossip!

0:10:27 > 0:10:30Right, OK!

0:10:30 > 0:10:32Grace has had her operation.

0:10:32 > 0:10:34Oh, has she? And it seems to have gone well,

0:10:34 > 0:10:36so she's got to have a bit more treatment and then...

0:10:36 > 0:10:38Oh, super. That's great news.

0:10:38 > 0:10:39Yeah.

0:10:42 > 0:10:44Ruth has brought her essential tools of the trade,

0:10:44 > 0:10:46a portable communion kit.

0:10:47 > 0:10:52Barbara is a former ward sister, and old habits die hard.

0:10:53 > 0:10:55The silver needs cleaning.

0:10:56 > 0:10:59Barbara! I told you she was straight-talking!

0:11:01 > 0:11:06I will bring you the polish and you can sit and clean it for me.

0:11:06 > 0:11:07Yeah, I will do.

0:11:10 > 0:11:14Barbara, the body and blood of Christ, keep you in eternal mass.

0:11:14 > 0:11:17Amen.

0:11:21 > 0:11:22You take care.

0:11:23 > 0:11:24- And you.- All right.

0:11:24 > 0:11:25Lovely to see you.

0:11:29 > 0:11:30It's going to be really tough...

0:11:31 > 0:11:36..yeah. And to be honest, the amount of times I've driven away here,

0:11:36 > 0:11:41you know, almost in tears just because I can see her slipping away.

0:11:41 > 0:11:44So when, actually, when she does die, it's going to be hard.

0:11:56 > 0:11:58In Much Wenlock,

0:11:58 > 0:12:01preparations are underway for a very special occasion.

0:12:03 > 0:12:05It's the high society wedding of the year in Much Wenlock

0:12:05 > 0:12:07of Mel and Stu,

0:12:07 > 0:12:10and, obviously, Mel and Stu are a local couple,

0:12:10 > 0:12:12lived in Much Wenlock all their life,

0:12:12 > 0:12:16went to the local school, and it will be a real community affair.

0:12:18 > 0:12:21The fanciest embroidery at this wedding

0:12:21 > 0:12:24will be on the vicar's surprise shirt.

0:12:24 > 0:12:27Just a stone's throw from Matthew's church

0:12:27 > 0:12:29is an ecclesiastical outfitters,

0:12:29 > 0:12:31one of just a handful in the country.

0:12:33 > 0:12:35Led by Brendan and Julie,

0:12:35 > 0:12:39they create everything from choir robes to Bishops mitres...

0:12:40 > 0:12:43..perfect for the flamboyant vicar about town.

0:12:45 > 0:12:50I'm just drawing this design for the back of Matthew's shirt.

0:12:51 > 0:12:56I thought I'd do it like a tattoo, you know, the old-fashioned ribbon.

0:12:57 > 0:12:58Mel loves Stu.

0:13:02 > 0:13:06The concept of the design combining the fire of Stu's profession

0:13:06 > 0:13:09with the scissors of Mel's comes from Matthew.

0:13:10 > 0:13:13Very often, Matthew's ideas are ones where you think to yourself,

0:13:13 > 0:13:16"That will never work in a million years!"

0:13:16 > 0:13:19But then when it actually all comes together on the day, you think,

0:13:19 > 0:13:22"Actually, yeah, no, he was right."

0:13:22 > 0:13:24It'll be the jazziest clerical shirt we've ever made.

0:13:35 > 0:13:37Following the church break-in,

0:13:37 > 0:13:40Nicholas wants to raise the issue of security

0:13:40 > 0:13:42with the wider church community.

0:13:44 > 0:13:46So he's invited police officer Charles Naylor

0:13:46 > 0:13:48to address a gathering of churchwardens

0:13:48 > 0:13:53at Dore Abbey, and, of course, to help ease the pressure

0:13:53 > 0:13:55on the groaning buffet table.

0:13:55 > 0:13:58Oh, oh, how could I refuse?

0:13:58 > 0:14:00You are kind. Thank you.

0:14:00 > 0:14:01One of my favourites.

0:14:01 > 0:14:02Really?

0:14:06 > 0:14:08Just over the last two or three weeks,

0:14:08 > 0:14:12we've had at least three reported thefts,

0:14:12 > 0:14:15burglaries from churches and it does focus the communities.

0:14:17 > 0:14:20Hello, everyone. Thank you very much for inviting me.

0:14:20 > 0:14:23One of the measures we're looking at

0:14:23 > 0:14:26is to provide churches across Herefordshire

0:14:26 > 0:14:32with a basic alarm system that I'm hoping

0:14:32 > 0:14:35we can roll out across Herefordshire,

0:14:35 > 0:14:37and if you need me to follow up,

0:14:37 > 0:14:41I can do that through any of the representatives here.

0:14:41 > 0:14:42Thank you very much.

0:14:45 > 0:14:48The damage done by the recent breaking and entering

0:14:48 > 0:14:51far exceeds the value of what was taken.

0:14:51 > 0:14:54So for Nicholas, the message is simple.

0:14:56 > 0:15:00Could I counsel against simply locking all churches

0:15:00 > 0:15:04because locking a church does not actually

0:15:04 > 0:15:06necessarily solve the problem.

0:15:06 > 0:15:08CHURCH BELLS RING

0:15:09 > 0:15:11You're never, ever, ever, ever,

0:15:11 > 0:15:15ever going to make these churches 100% safe and secure.

0:15:15 > 0:15:18You know, if somebody's going to want to break into it,

0:15:18 > 0:15:20then they'll get into it.

0:15:20 > 0:15:23You've just got to take sensible measures to discourage it.

0:15:27 > 0:15:31Hereford's 403 churches are looked after

0:15:31 > 0:15:34by a small army of mostly elderly churchwardens.

0:15:36 > 0:15:40After nearly a decade of service, Ruth's churchwarden, Barbara,

0:15:40 > 0:15:43had to give up her duties six months ago.

0:15:45 > 0:15:48People from the church have begun to say goodbye to her.

0:15:48 > 0:15:53She's ready to die, she's accepted that's what's coming

0:15:53 > 0:15:55and she would like...

0:15:56 > 0:15:57..it just to be over.

0:16:00 > 0:16:05Perhaps that's why people turn to faith in times of trouble

0:16:05 > 0:16:07or pain.

0:16:07 > 0:16:09That's when they can open themselves

0:16:09 > 0:16:14and God draws close to them and they can draw close to God.

0:16:33 > 0:16:35- Hello, Barbara.- Hello, Ruth.

0:16:35 > 0:16:38Let me give you a kiss. Hello.

0:16:38 > 0:16:40Are you not feeling too good?

0:16:40 > 0:16:42I'm not too good, no.

0:16:42 > 0:16:45I'll sit on here for a minute.

0:16:45 > 0:16:46I've brought that for you.

0:16:46 > 0:16:50It's kind of always reminded me of the power of prayer

0:16:50 > 0:16:52and the comfort of prayer.

0:16:52 > 0:16:54What do you pray for?

0:16:56 > 0:16:58I pray for my family.

0:16:58 > 0:16:59Yeah.

0:17:02 > 0:17:04That they'll be all right when I've gone.

0:17:06 > 0:17:08Have you spoken to your daughter in Australia?

0:17:10 > 0:17:12Yes, I have.

0:17:13 > 0:17:16She's always very loving on the phone.

0:17:16 > 0:17:18Yeah.

0:17:18 > 0:17:20She wants me to be comfortable and...

0:17:20 > 0:17:22Yeah.

0:17:24 > 0:17:28You take care and just WhatsApp me

0:17:28 > 0:17:30if there's anything you need.

0:17:31 > 0:17:33Yes, I will.

0:17:33 > 0:17:34Keeping with the times.

0:17:35 > 0:17:36You take care. All right?

0:17:36 > 0:17:38- Thank you, Ruth.- Lovely to see you.

0:17:38 > 0:17:40Thank you for coming.

0:17:40 > 0:17:41See you again.

0:17:49 > 0:17:51It's really hard to see her like that,

0:17:51 > 0:17:54because, on the one hand, you really care about her

0:17:54 > 0:17:57and you don't want her to die,

0:17:57 > 0:17:59because then she won't be here, but on the other hand...

0:18:00 > 0:18:04..you really want her to be free from what she's suffering,

0:18:04 > 0:18:06and there's so many people who do care about her

0:18:06 > 0:18:09and I think would want her to be free and at peace...

0:18:11 > 0:18:14..but then you want her to be around, so, it is,

0:18:14 > 0:18:16it's hard to see her like that.

0:18:23 > 0:18:26It's a vicar's job to guide people through the milestones

0:18:26 > 0:18:27in their lives.

0:18:29 > 0:18:31As their wedding draws near,

0:18:31 > 0:18:35Matthew wants to explain to Mel and Stu what Christian marriage means.

0:18:37 > 0:18:39So we'll now do

0:18:39 > 0:18:42what I call Reverend Matthew's guide to marital bliss.

0:18:43 > 0:18:46There is a legal requirement on my part

0:18:46 > 0:18:49to obviously prepare you for marriage, yeah?

0:18:49 > 0:18:52This is not marriage counselling, do you know what I mean?

0:18:52 > 0:18:55There is a big difference between a registry office,

0:18:55 > 0:18:57swanky hotel and church,

0:18:57 > 0:19:01because we are saying, from a Christian point of view,

0:19:01 > 0:19:02that marriage...

0:19:03 > 0:19:07..at its best is the ultimate expression of love.

0:19:07 > 0:19:10It's about you two expressing your commitment to one another,

0:19:10 > 0:19:13and it's also the Gaffer expressing His commitment to you also

0:19:13 > 0:19:15because He wants to be

0:19:15 > 0:19:16that supporting cord that ensures

0:19:16 > 0:19:19that your marriage is fulfilling and lifelong, OK?

0:19:24 > 0:19:28The Church of England conducts around 40,000 weddings a year,

0:19:28 > 0:19:30a fifth of the national total.

0:19:32 > 0:19:34We've done the marriage rehearsal bit, yeah?

0:19:34 > 0:19:37So obviously, I'm just going to go through the service

0:19:37 > 0:19:40so that you know exactly what you're buying into.

0:19:40 > 0:19:42As official registrars,

0:19:42 > 0:19:46vicars log each wedding in books stored for future generations.

0:19:48 > 0:19:53Back at home, Nicholas is determined not to lose the valuable information

0:19:53 > 0:19:55recorded in his water-damaged registers.

0:19:56 > 0:19:59I phoned up the County Records Office,

0:19:59 > 0:20:02and they were really, really, really helpful,

0:20:02 > 0:20:08and they sent me a fairly detailed e-mail about what to do,

0:20:08 > 0:20:10which is basically that the books need freezing.

0:20:13 > 0:20:14While they're damp,

0:20:14 > 0:20:18they're going to go mouldy and in fact, the burials register,

0:20:18 > 0:20:21the cover of that has already started to go mouldy.

0:20:27 > 0:20:30These black marks are new,

0:20:30 > 0:20:34and they've come up in just a few days,

0:20:34 > 0:20:37and so you can see how something like this can deteriorate

0:20:37 > 0:20:40if you don't do something to it, like shove it in the deep freeze.

0:20:42 > 0:20:47At the moment, I just hope that the information there is recoverable.

0:20:49 > 0:20:51When you put them in, you need to make sure...

0:20:52 > 0:20:55..that they go in spine down on the bottom

0:20:55 > 0:20:58and as the burials register is the most important one,

0:20:58 > 0:21:00that's what we've done with that.

0:21:05 > 0:21:08The records will stay in Nicholas's freezer

0:21:08 > 0:21:10until they can be sent to a specialist book restorer.

0:21:13 > 0:21:18Anybody who does damage in a church, which is a sacred space,

0:21:18 > 0:21:22and steals something from the church, which is a sacred space,

0:21:22 > 0:21:25is somebody who's got big problems.

0:21:26 > 0:21:31But if you pinched the records box and you're watching this, yes,

0:21:31 > 0:21:32I forgive you.

0:21:41 > 0:21:44After seven months in Hereford Hospice,

0:21:44 > 0:21:46Barbara, Ruth's church warden,

0:21:46 > 0:21:47has passed away.

0:21:49 > 0:21:51She died peacefully in her sleep.

0:21:54 > 0:21:57Barbara did not like having her photo taken,

0:21:57 > 0:22:01and so trying to find photos of Barbara was very difficult,

0:22:01 > 0:22:04and so these are the ones that we actually came up with,

0:22:04 > 0:22:06but this was Barbara in her absolute prime,

0:22:06 > 0:22:09this was when she was churchwarden,

0:22:09 > 0:22:14and was a very prominent figure in the church and a very strong lady.

0:22:15 > 0:22:20The loss is huge. It's like losing a member of the family.

0:22:20 > 0:22:23There have been a lot of tears shed,

0:22:23 > 0:22:27there have been a lot of questions and I think tomorrow will be...

0:22:27 > 0:22:29There will be a lot of people here.

0:22:35 > 0:22:37Every day in England,

0:22:37 > 0:22:40there are seven so-called lonely funerals,

0:22:40 > 0:22:42with often nobody in attendance.

0:22:45 > 0:22:49Barbara may have lived alone, but as part of a church community,

0:22:49 > 0:22:51her death is mourned by many.

0:22:54 > 0:22:57Today, we celebrate Barbara's life

0:22:57 > 0:22:59and we commend her to God's loving eternal care.

0:23:02 > 0:23:05Barbara was confident in where she was going,

0:23:05 > 0:23:08and her faith in that loving care of God

0:23:08 > 0:23:10remained strong until her death.

0:23:12 > 0:23:13Visiting her in hospital,

0:23:13 > 0:23:17and then later in the hospice,

0:23:17 > 0:23:19and then finally helping to take her funeral,

0:23:19 > 0:23:22it's a privilege to walk with somebody along that whole journey.

0:23:23 > 0:23:26You just pray that somehow,

0:23:26 > 0:23:30God speaks through you and offers His comfort and His peace.

0:23:34 > 0:23:38Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil...

0:23:39 > 0:23:41..for thine is the kingdom,

0:23:41 > 0:23:45the power and the glory forever and ever.

0:23:45 > 0:23:46Amen.

0:24:02 > 0:24:05In Much Wenlock, the church is being prepared

0:24:05 > 0:24:07for one of life's happier milestones.

0:24:10 > 0:24:12Steadying his nerves in time-honoured fashion,

0:24:12 > 0:24:15groom Stu has stopped off for a quickie.

0:24:16 > 0:24:18Only a couple of pints, I don't want to get too drunk

0:24:18 > 0:24:20before the wedding day.

0:24:20 > 0:24:21Here's to a nice day everyone. Cheers.

0:24:21 > 0:24:22- ALL:- Cheers.

0:24:23 > 0:24:28Just for once, bride-to-be Mel has taken the chair in her salon.

0:24:29 > 0:24:32Just really looking forward to the day, really excited.

0:24:32 > 0:24:33The nerves haven't set in yet.

0:24:35 > 0:24:39Mel has planned every detail with one exception -

0:24:39 > 0:24:43the one big unknown is what is underneath the vicar's cassock.

0:24:45 > 0:24:48Just to give a lift for Mel at the end,

0:24:48 > 0:24:50I shall speed round the back of the organ...

0:24:51 > 0:24:56..take my cassock off and give her a flash of my back, that's all,

0:24:56 > 0:24:58and obviously, she can obviously see

0:24:58 > 0:25:00this very special commissioned design

0:25:00 > 0:25:02for the wedding.

0:25:03 > 0:25:05CHURCH BELLS RING

0:25:06 > 0:25:11For the bride's arrival, the sun has come out, along with half the town.

0:25:16 > 0:25:18Nothing wrong with a swanky hotel or the registry office

0:25:18 > 0:25:20but I'm going to be biased,

0:25:20 > 0:25:22I don't think you can beat a church wedding.

0:25:27 > 0:25:29All right, well, the girls are going down first

0:25:29 > 0:25:31so we'll wait for them to get to the bottom.

0:25:31 > 0:25:33They're going first, yeah, that's fine, that's fine.

0:25:33 > 0:25:36- But cherish the moment, yes?- Yes. - Right.

0:25:36 > 0:25:38Oh, my days.

0:25:41 > 0:25:43I'm really desperate for a glass of water,

0:25:43 > 0:25:45but I'll hold on for three quarters of an hour

0:25:45 > 0:25:46and then have a gin and tonic.

0:25:48 > 0:25:50God is good and the sun is shining,

0:25:50 > 0:25:52and a genuine warm welcome to all of you

0:25:52 > 0:25:55who have travelled both near and far on this very, very special day.

0:26:07 > 0:26:10In the presence of God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit,

0:26:10 > 0:26:15we have come together to witness the marriage of Stu and Mel,

0:26:15 > 0:26:17to pray for God's blessing on them,

0:26:17 > 0:26:20to share their joy and to celebrate their love.

0:26:21 > 0:26:25For me, it's always about not taking myself too seriously,

0:26:25 > 0:26:28but taking God and what I do seriously.

0:26:28 > 0:26:30I, Stuart William David Tabron...

0:26:30 > 0:26:33I, Stuart William David Tabron...

0:26:33 > 0:26:36You know, I'm very passionate about ensuring that I give people

0:26:36 > 0:26:40the most positive experience of the Christian faith,

0:26:40 > 0:26:43and, indeed, the Christian church as I possibly can.

0:26:45 > 0:26:48In the presence of God, and before this congregation,

0:26:48 > 0:26:50I proclaim that they are husband and wife,

0:26:50 > 0:26:52and for that, we break the formality

0:26:52 > 0:26:54and give them a round of applause.

0:26:54 > 0:26:56CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:27:02 > 0:27:05Mel and Stu's marriage is recorded in the church register,

0:27:05 > 0:27:08as countless generations have done before.

0:27:11 > 0:27:15But the next ritual, like the vicar himself, is a one-off.

0:27:19 > 0:27:22SHE LAUGHS

0:27:22 > 0:27:25APPLAUSE

0:27:26 > 0:27:30It's been an amazing day, and the service was fabulous.

0:27:30 > 0:27:32I loved his shirt as well,

0:27:32 > 0:27:35Matthew's, it went really, really well, didn't it?

0:27:35 > 0:27:37Yeah!

0:27:37 > 0:27:40He probably has changed our thoughts on things.

0:27:40 > 0:27:42I could see myself going now to, like,

0:27:42 > 0:27:44an Easter service or Christmas service.

0:27:44 > 0:27:47We've got to live up to the vows now.

0:27:47 > 0:27:49What's yours is mine and what's mine's mine!

0:27:49 > 0:27:51SHE LAUGHS

0:27:51 > 0:27:52No chance!

0:27:55 > 0:28:00Whether people come to church or not, the church is there for them.

0:28:00 > 0:28:02You meet people where they are,

0:28:02 > 0:28:05you ensure that your church is as open,

0:28:05 > 0:28:08accessible as possible

0:28:08 > 0:28:11because I think that's what Christ expects of us.

0:28:16 > 0:28:20Next time, Ruth gets a new assistant fresh from college...

0:28:20 > 0:28:22I'm terrified.

0:28:22 > 0:28:25Matthew swings into action at the village fete...

0:28:25 > 0:28:28This is a man who got a U at A-level RE and look at me now!

0:28:28 > 0:28:31..and Nicholas issues a wake-up call.

0:28:31 > 0:28:33We don't want to be the generation

0:28:33 > 0:28:35which finally put God's church to bed.