0:00:02 > 0:00:05- More tea vicar? Yeah, go on, then. - Vicars, pillars of the community...
0:00:05 > 0:00:10- High enough yet? - ..as English as tea and cake, and cricket on the village green...
0:00:10 > 0:00:15- Nice to see you, to see you...nice. - ..but times are changing.
0:00:15 > 0:00:20- Would you like to pray now? Would you find that helpful?- No.
0:00:20 > 0:00:23Congregations are ageing and faith is fading...
0:00:23 > 0:00:26People in this country do not go to church.
0:00:26 > 0:00:30..so today's vicars are working hard to stay relevant.
0:00:30 > 0:00:33The safeguards that are in place are not catching people who are
0:00:33 > 0:00:35in desperate need.
0:00:35 > 0:00:37In this series, vicars from Hereford,
0:00:37 > 0:00:40the Church of England's most rural diocese,
0:00:40 > 0:00:42let us into their life and work...
0:00:42 > 0:00:47Let's do chocolate digestive communion and have half each.
0:00:47 > 0:00:49..bringing support and comfort to the young...
0:00:49 > 0:00:51Stylish flip-flops.
0:00:51 > 0:00:53..and the young at heart.
0:00:53 > 0:00:55How old are you, Sarah?
0:00:55 > 0:00:57- 21.- 21, yeah.
0:00:57 > 0:00:59It's all part of a vicar's life.
0:01:07 > 0:01:11In the north of the diocese is the Wenlock team of parishes.
0:01:13 > 0:01:14This road is an utter nightmare.
0:01:16 > 0:01:20If it's a funeral day, you've got to give yourself plenty of time or else
0:01:20 > 0:01:24the funeral will be done and dusted and you'll still be waiting for the vicar.
0:01:24 > 0:01:29Team Rector Reverend Matthew Stafford looks after 14 churches,
0:01:29 > 0:01:31serving 6,000 people.
0:01:32 > 0:01:36Matthew's rural patch has a high percentage of elderly people.
0:01:41 > 0:01:43- Hello, there.- Hello. - Hello, Dolly.
0:01:43 > 0:01:46Today, he's holding a remembrance service
0:01:46 > 0:01:49for residents of the Lady Forester nursing home.
0:01:49 > 0:01:53- Are we having a cup of tea today, Paula?- Yes, we're having a cup of tea.
0:01:53 > 0:01:55I'm a bit dry.
0:01:57 > 0:01:58There you go, our Sarah.
0:01:58 > 0:01:59Thank you.
0:02:01 > 0:02:03Is everyone happy? Front row?
0:02:04 > 0:02:07This is the last of a particular generation,
0:02:07 > 0:02:09the one that we're in the company of now.
0:02:09 > 0:02:11There'll never be a generation like it again.
0:02:11 > 0:02:16By nature of what life has thrown at them, by nature of, you know,
0:02:16 > 0:02:20experiencing war, experiencing having to make a little bit
0:02:20 > 0:02:26go a long way, and they are a feisty group.
0:02:26 > 0:02:28We all love to be remembered,
0:02:28 > 0:02:33but if we want to be remembered, we have a duty, also, to remember.
0:02:33 > 0:02:37Memory is a powerful thing, it keeps the past alive.
0:02:37 > 0:02:41And so may the Lord ever look kindly on the infirm with his love,
0:02:41 > 0:02:44his peace, his joy, and his care.
0:02:44 > 0:02:47This day and forevermore.
0:02:47 > 0:02:49Amen.
0:02:49 > 0:02:54It's very rude and discourteous for a good-looking man... Ha-ha!
0:02:54 > 0:02:56THEY LAUGH
0:02:56 > 0:02:59..to ask a lady their age.
0:02:59 > 0:03:00But how old are you, Sarah?
0:03:00 > 0:03:02- 21.- 21, yeah.
0:03:02 > 0:03:05THEY ALL LAUGH
0:03:05 > 0:03:08- (Isn't it 104?)- Pardon? - Aren't you 104?
0:03:08 > 0:03:11Yes.
0:03:11 > 0:03:15So, what is the secret to your long levity?
0:03:16 > 0:03:22- What is what?- What is the secret to your long levity?
0:03:24 > 0:03:28Why do you think you're still here?
0:03:28 > 0:03:32- LAUGHTER - Good parents.- Good parents, you see. - Yes.
0:03:40 > 0:03:45Reaching out to older people is important in scattered rural
0:03:45 > 0:03:49communities, where half of over 75s live alone.
0:03:49 > 0:03:51Are you behaving your age?
0:03:51 > 0:03:55At the western edge of the diocese, near the Welsh border...
0:03:55 > 0:03:57Come on, beast!
0:03:57 > 0:03:59..for the Reverend Nicholas Lowton,
0:03:59 > 0:04:03a bracing dog walk is also a chance to drop in on an elderly neighbour.
0:04:08 > 0:04:10One of the issues around here when it comes to old people,
0:04:10 > 0:04:12especially I have to say,
0:04:12 > 0:04:16old people in the farming community, is that asking for help is not
0:04:16 > 0:04:19something which comes always naturally to them.
0:04:21 > 0:04:23And making sure that they are warm,
0:04:24 > 0:04:27and making sure that they've got enough food
0:04:27 > 0:04:29is an important thing to do.
0:04:29 > 0:04:32Because some of the houses they live in are...
0:04:34 > 0:04:36..not exactly modern.
0:04:39 > 0:04:42Well, we'll see if Ronnie is in, who lives just around the corner here.
0:04:42 > 0:04:45Ooh, right.
0:04:45 > 0:04:4980-year-old Ronnie is a retired carpenter.
0:04:49 > 0:04:52He's lived in the same house since he was six months old.
0:04:53 > 0:04:55I've never known no other.
0:04:56 > 0:04:58Got to make the best of it, I suppose.
0:05:01 > 0:05:04- Have you got enough logs? - Pardon?- Have you got enough logs?
0:05:04 > 0:05:06Oh, yes.
0:05:06 > 0:05:10- So how are you keeping up here? - Struggling on quietly.
0:05:10 > 0:05:12- Quietly?- Yeah.
0:05:12 > 0:05:18- I've heard many adverbs that describe you, but quietly isn't one of them.- They all tell me that!
0:05:18 > 0:05:20What are you doing at Christmas?
0:05:20 > 0:05:24Um... It's a debatable question yet.
0:05:24 > 0:05:28- You'll be on your own?- Probably, well, I mean it depends anyway.
0:05:28 > 0:05:32There's always someone along the line.
0:05:32 > 0:05:35If no-one else, there's the vicar.
0:05:35 > 0:05:37Well, I'll be on me own, so yeah.
0:05:37 > 0:05:40All right. That'll make two of us then.
0:05:40 > 0:05:43Right, I'm going to take the dogs on their way.
0:05:43 > 0:05:46- It's good to see you.- And you. - I'll see you on a dog walk soon.
0:05:46 > 0:05:49- Probably will.- Bye, Ronnie.
0:05:49 > 0:05:51- OK, then.- Come on, dogs, we're going this way.
0:05:53 > 0:05:56What I always reckon, he's a good bloke with a funeral.
0:05:58 > 0:06:01You know, like he seemed to know how to handle it then.
0:06:01 > 0:06:03Put it that way.
0:06:05 > 0:06:08Vicars dedicate much of their ministry to older people.
0:06:10 > 0:06:14But connecting with a younger generation means being there
0:06:14 > 0:06:18at their point of need. And for many, that's on a heavy night out.
0:06:23 > 0:06:26In Hereford, curate Father Matthew Cashmore
0:06:26 > 0:06:28is training to be a street pastor.
0:06:30 > 0:06:32Street pastors, if you've been in any city centre,
0:06:32 > 0:06:35you will have seen these guys. They are amazing.
0:06:35 > 0:06:39Anyone who has been out in the town on a Friday or Saturday night who've
0:06:39 > 0:06:45lost their shoes will know the street pastors because they hand out flip-flops and water.
0:06:46 > 0:06:49And they pick up broken bottles.
0:06:49 > 0:06:52And they make the streets a safer place at night.
0:06:54 > 0:06:59Made up of church volunteers, street pastors are familiar sight in over
0:06:59 > 0:07:01300 cities and towns across the UK.
0:07:05 > 0:07:08OK, good morning and welcome.
0:07:08 > 0:07:13Before hitting the streets, Matthew has a first aid training session
0:07:13 > 0:07:16run by the head of the Hereford team, Robert Thomas.
0:07:16 > 0:07:20Alongside the theory, the majority of the training
0:07:20 > 0:07:23is all about real-life scenarios and what we seek to do
0:07:23 > 0:07:27is prepare the teams for the very worst thing that can happen.
0:07:27 > 0:07:32And extreme scenario training is taken very seriously.
0:07:33 > 0:07:35For authentic Friday night mayhem,
0:07:35 > 0:07:38they've drafted in actors and makeup artists.
0:07:38 > 0:07:41I broke my arm and he's been stabbed, so...
0:07:43 > 0:07:46It can be quite shocking, if you haven't seen it before.
0:07:46 > 0:07:50You know, because sometimes the blood and that throws people.
0:07:50 > 0:07:53So, yeah, we try and make it as real as possible.
0:07:53 > 0:07:55With the actors on set...
0:07:55 > 0:07:57Oh, here she is.
0:07:57 > 0:08:00..the rookie pastors are put to the test.
0:08:00 > 0:08:02Hello, there.
0:08:02 > 0:08:04My name is Matthew, I'm with the street pastors.
0:08:04 > 0:08:05- What's your name?- Sian.
0:08:05 > 0:08:10Sian, you've got an injury there to your arm.
0:08:10 > 0:08:13Try not to move that for me, OK?
0:08:13 > 0:08:16I think with that extended injury there, we'll need an ambulance.
0:08:16 > 0:08:17An ambulance, please. Yeah.
0:08:19 > 0:08:23So this is an extreme fall where somebody's got quite a severe break
0:08:23 > 0:08:25to their arm.
0:08:25 > 0:08:27Well done. Really good.
0:08:28 > 0:08:32They're then going to come across somebody who's been a victim of an assault.
0:08:32 > 0:08:34Oh, crumbs! Another incident.
0:08:34 > 0:08:38We have a patient with a stab wound to lower
0:08:38 > 0:08:41right-hand side abdomen.
0:08:41 > 0:08:43Potentially piercing the lung.
0:08:43 > 0:08:45On the streets, the teams can deal
0:08:45 > 0:08:48with three first aid incidents a night.
0:08:48 > 0:08:51They save, on average, 24 ambulance calls a month.
0:08:53 > 0:08:55Well done, guys. Round of applause.
0:08:55 > 0:08:58That's it, we're done.
0:08:58 > 0:09:01Everyone is back alive.
0:09:03 > 0:09:05It's hard to get my mind around "this isn't real".
0:09:05 > 0:09:09So I'm unwrapping a with due care and attention
0:09:09 > 0:09:11to not actually take your arm off.
0:09:11 > 0:09:15Training completed, Matthew's now officially ready to hit the town.
0:09:17 > 0:09:20I have no idea what Hereford's nightlife is.
0:09:20 > 0:09:22That's not true, that's not true.
0:09:22 > 0:09:26I got drunk in the Lichfield Vaults one night.
0:09:26 > 0:09:29But I got a taxi home and it was all fine.
0:09:33 > 0:09:37In Matthew Stafford's parishes, the ageing population brings
0:09:37 > 0:09:39challenging health issues.
0:09:40 > 0:09:44One in six people over the age of 80 are now affected by what's becoming
0:09:44 > 0:09:47a fact of later life - dementia.
0:09:49 > 0:09:52I'm off to visit a lovely, lovely couple called
0:09:52 > 0:09:54Jane and Nick Bishop.
0:09:54 > 0:09:59Now, Nick, bless him, has got quite advanced dementia.
0:10:00 > 0:10:04I mean this is a guy who was, you know, and still is,
0:10:04 > 0:10:08you know, deeply gifted, deeply talented.
0:10:08 > 0:10:10And a true gentleman.
0:10:14 > 0:10:16- Good morning.- Good morning, Matthew.
0:10:16 > 0:10:19- How are you this morning? - I'm fine.- Good, good.
0:10:19 > 0:10:23- Lovely day.- I brought you flowers. - Oh, you shouldn't do that. Gosh!
0:10:23 > 0:10:27Jane is one of Matthew's church wardens.
0:10:27 > 0:10:29She's been married to Nick for 40 years.
0:10:29 > 0:10:32I can't leave him out. I can't leave you out.
0:10:32 > 0:10:33Those are for you.
0:10:33 > 0:10:36Matthew is very sweet, he's brought you these biscuits.
0:10:38 > 0:10:42- Darling, darling sit down. - You're fine.- Sit, darling, sit down.
0:10:43 > 0:10:47Sometimes the dementia becomes the be all and the end all, forgetting
0:10:47 > 0:10:52that this is an individual with a vast experience.
0:10:52 > 0:10:55And I think it's important that that's not forgotten.
0:10:55 > 0:10:59- Well, it's good that you talk about it because I almost can't remember him now without it.- Yeah, yeah.
0:10:59 > 0:11:02So, it's nice being reminded.
0:11:02 > 0:11:04Darling, sit down. Sit down.
0:11:04 > 0:11:07Your day starts, when?
0:11:07 > 0:11:08I get up about half past six.
0:11:08 > 0:11:12- Right.- Get myself dressed and then I get him dressed and shaved,
0:11:12 > 0:11:15and downstairs for breakfast.
0:11:15 > 0:11:19- And then he usually goes back to sleep again at the kitchen table. - Oh, bless you.
0:11:19 > 0:11:22- I don't know about you but if you don't laugh, you'd cry.- Yes, quite.
0:11:22 > 0:11:24Actually, it's terribly funny,
0:11:24 > 0:11:27did I tell you about the time...? I'd gone up to church.
0:11:27 > 0:11:30Nick walked in, so I hid.
0:11:30 > 0:11:34And hoping Nick would go down to the house again and I thought he'd gone
0:11:34 > 0:11:37and I was looking around the curtain like this.
0:11:37 > 0:11:40They must have thought, "What an extraordinary church we're coming to
0:11:40 > 0:11:44"with the churchwarden peeking around the curtain!"
0:11:44 > 0:11:47They must have thought, "What have we come to?"
0:11:49 > 0:11:52Darling, I think that you've probably had enough biscuits.
0:11:52 > 0:11:57I'll tell you what, let's do chocolate digestive communion,
0:11:57 > 0:11:58and have half each.
0:11:58 > 0:12:00- There you go.- Yes. Goodo!
0:12:02 > 0:12:06Coffee, sympathy, and a chance to laugh is a welcome distraction.
0:12:08 > 0:12:12Jane looks after Nick full-time with occasional help from respite carers.
0:12:13 > 0:12:17In order for you to continue doing what you're doing,
0:12:17 > 0:12:21- you've got to look after yourself. - Yes, I know, I know.
0:12:21 > 0:12:23I do... I do realise that.
0:12:23 > 0:12:27You don't realise until he has gone off with the respite care just how
0:12:27 > 0:12:30much you need that rest actually.
0:12:30 > 0:12:32And just some sensible conversation with people.
0:12:32 > 0:12:34- Yes.- That makes a huge difference.
0:12:34 > 0:12:38Because I don't think we've ever had such a silent life in our lives,
0:12:38 > 0:12:39as we are having now.
0:12:44 > 0:12:47Right, bless you both. And I shall see you again very, very soon.
0:12:47 > 0:12:52Bye, Matthew. We'll see you very soon. Absolutely. And thank you so much for my flowers again.
0:12:52 > 0:12:53Bless you, Nick.
0:13:01 > 0:13:07I'm in awe of Jane because of her dedication to Nick.
0:13:07 > 0:13:09She inspires me.
0:13:13 > 0:13:17Matthew, like Jane, is also dealing with dementia in his family.
0:13:20 > 0:13:2718 months ago, my father-in-law took a significant turn for the worst.
0:13:27 > 0:13:33So, Dad moved from Wirral to Shropshire.
0:13:34 > 0:13:37We go all out, my wife,
0:13:37 > 0:13:43Charlie's daughter, and myself to maximise his quality of life
0:13:43 > 0:13:46and independence wherever possible, but it is...
0:13:48 > 0:13:50It's a very pressured existence at the moment.
0:14:00 > 0:14:03When rural communities pull together to help each other,
0:14:03 > 0:14:06a vicar's support can make all the difference.
0:14:10 > 0:14:13You're not taking a picture of the vicar's knickers, I trust!
0:14:14 > 0:14:20Nicholas has a lunch date in the nearby village of Pontrilas.
0:14:20 > 0:14:26We're going to a weekly lunch club, which is with local farmers
0:14:26 > 0:14:31in the area, which gives them a chance to be together.
0:14:31 > 0:14:33It is very much a community initiative.
0:14:33 > 0:14:37And there's this lovely lady, Sonia, who runs it.
0:14:37 > 0:14:42Sonia and partner Nigel rescued the village post office by turning it
0:14:42 > 0:14:45into a non-profit-making social enterprise.
0:14:45 > 0:14:47They even asked Nicholas to bless it.
0:14:47 > 0:14:49The lunch club meets around the back.
0:14:51 > 0:14:54Hello, Nicholas, so good to see you.
0:14:54 > 0:14:57It's lovely to see you. You're having a busy day here?
0:14:57 > 0:15:01- We're having a very busy day today, actually.- That's good. - A very busy day.- That's really good.
0:15:01 > 0:15:06- We've started without you, unfortunately.- Quite right, too. Clergy are always unreliable.
0:15:08 > 0:15:10Can I ruin your lunch by joining you?
0:15:10 > 0:15:12Don't want any problems.
0:15:12 > 0:15:14You are kind.
0:15:14 > 0:15:18The lunch club members come in, not just for lunch club on Tuesday.
0:15:18 > 0:15:21They will come in the week and they'll have a game of Scrabble,
0:15:21 > 0:15:25they'll have a coffee and chitchat, they play chess.
0:15:25 > 0:15:29And rocking the party with his essential mix, DJ Brian.
0:15:29 > 0:15:35Acker Bilk and Stranger On The Shore, from 1960...
0:15:35 > 0:15:37Many who come here care for spouses.
0:15:38 > 0:15:42And who in all of this is looking after you?
0:15:42 > 0:15:46- The man upstairs.- That's it. - Yeah, that's right.- Right.
0:15:48 > 0:15:52- Can we have a pud, Sonia, please? - Of course. Absolutely. - That was delicious.
0:15:52 > 0:15:56- Good.- How are you coping with funding?- The proceeds from the shop
0:15:56 > 0:15:58pay for the services that we provide.
0:15:58 > 0:16:01- So that's how we operate. - That's fantastic.
0:16:01 > 0:16:04- True social enterprise.- Absolutely. - Yeah.- That's brilliant.
0:16:04 > 0:16:07See you soon.
0:16:07 > 0:16:12Taking a walk down memory lane. That was The Shadows and the theme from Cavatina.
0:16:13 > 0:16:17- I'm sure we'll meet again.- Yes. Don't know where, don't know when.
0:16:17 > 0:16:19Lovely to see you.
0:16:21 > 0:16:25Well, I think it's wonderful. The number of people they have in there,
0:16:25 > 0:16:29the fact that it's clearly not just fulfilling a need, but people
0:16:29 > 0:16:33are really enjoying it is fantastic, it really is.
0:16:36 > 0:16:38It's not a church building,
0:16:38 > 0:16:44it's not a place that people would find for themselves where God is,
0:16:44 > 0:16:50but what they find is kindness and love and friendship and support,
0:16:50 > 0:16:53and I guess that's what we do. We're good Samaritans.
0:17:02 > 0:17:06Many parents today are supporting relatives at both ends of life.
0:17:08 > 0:17:12As well as looking after 14 churches and his own family,
0:17:12 > 0:17:14Matthew Stafford manages the care
0:17:14 > 0:17:16of wife Julie's elderly father, Charlie.
0:17:19 > 0:17:22When I'm not obviously endeavouring
0:17:22 > 0:17:25to do mighty works for Jesus, this...
0:17:25 > 0:17:28This is what's taking up my time at the present moment.
0:17:28 > 0:17:31Oh, my life! I'll need my glasses to read that e-mail.
0:17:32 > 0:17:36He knows exactly who to ring and who the social worker was 14 years ago.
0:17:36 > 0:17:39You know, he's got his box files everywhere.
0:17:39 > 0:17:43All right, that's great. Thank you ever so much, Sue. Yeah, God love you.
0:17:44 > 0:17:47He's very close to my mum and dad, so he...
0:17:47 > 0:17:50He would do anything for them.
0:17:50 > 0:17:53But you'll have noticed that Matthew's like that with everybody.
0:17:53 > 0:17:55All right, we ready?
0:17:57 > 0:18:00Matthew and Julie moved Charlie to a nearby care home
0:18:00 > 0:18:01just under two years ago.
0:18:04 > 0:18:07He only had two stipulations.
0:18:07 > 0:18:09One, that he could bring his 52-inch telly,
0:18:09 > 0:18:12and also that he could bring the budgie.
0:18:15 > 0:18:17All right, Dad?
0:18:19 > 0:18:22- Are you all right?- Yeah, of course I am, apart from my hands.
0:18:22 > 0:18:24- Your hands?- What's the matter with your hands today?
0:18:24 > 0:18:28- Cold.- Cold? Right, do your Spider-Man hands for me.
0:18:29 > 0:18:32- This is you, looking like Scrooge. - I am Scrooge.
0:18:32 > 0:18:35You are? Well, I always thought you were a bit tight,
0:18:35 > 0:18:38but I didn't like to say anything.
0:18:38 > 0:18:40- Right, are you in?- Yeah, I'm in.
0:18:42 > 0:18:45I'll get you another drink. All right?
0:18:45 > 0:18:50Charlie has dementia, and is losing his sight.
0:18:50 > 0:18:53He's also lost a leg due to complications from diabetes.
0:18:55 > 0:18:58In his heyday, he was a really witty
0:18:58 > 0:19:02life and soul of the party personality, but...
0:19:02 > 0:19:04It is what it is.
0:19:04 > 0:19:06You know?
0:19:06 > 0:19:09And you just have to make the best of a...
0:19:09 > 0:19:13Of a bad job and you cherish the moment, because
0:19:13 > 0:19:16you don't know how long he's going to be here for.
0:19:16 > 0:19:19All right now, Dad.
0:19:19 > 0:19:21Look after yourself.
0:19:21 > 0:19:22I will.
0:19:22 > 0:19:26Juggling the balls of life at times has not been easy,
0:19:26 > 0:19:29and it's certainly taken its toll.
0:19:29 > 0:19:32- See you later.- Toodle-oo.
0:19:32 > 0:19:37I think one of the joys of being a priest is the fact that you
0:19:37 > 0:19:41can support other people in similar situations.
0:19:41 > 0:19:44Because there's that phrase, you know, "We're all in it together."
0:19:53 > 0:19:55It's Saturday night in Hereford.
0:19:58 > 0:20:01Matthew's facing his first street pastor shift,
0:20:01 > 0:20:02and town is looking lively.
0:20:05 > 0:20:07So, just to let you know,
0:20:07 > 0:20:10Echo Alpha's just informed us it's going to be probably quite a busy
0:20:10 > 0:20:14night, and we've got a herd of cows and a group of zombies out.
0:20:14 > 0:20:15Great.
0:20:18 > 0:20:22Young people from all over this rural area pour into the city
0:20:22 > 0:20:23for its nightlife.
0:20:23 > 0:20:28Showing Matthew the ropes tonight is veteran street pastor Jocelyn.
0:20:30 > 0:20:34So as we walk along now, we're always sort of keeping an eye out.
0:20:34 > 0:20:37So, you know, looking down alleyways, into shop fronts,
0:20:37 > 0:20:41in case there might be somebody slumped in the doorway.
0:20:41 > 0:20:44- How you doing?- All right. - Yeah, you?- So far so good?
0:20:44 > 0:20:45- Yeah.- A lolly?
0:20:45 > 0:20:48- Yeah, for you. - Oh, you're a treacle, you.
0:20:48 > 0:20:50You're the best, mate.
0:20:50 > 0:20:52I try.
0:20:52 > 0:20:54- Ta-ra, chaps.- Bye.
0:20:54 > 0:20:56Bye now.
0:20:56 > 0:21:00I think people don't look at us and think,
0:21:00 > 0:21:03"There's a bunch of Bible bashers or the God squad."
0:21:03 > 0:21:05I think at best people look at us and go,
0:21:05 > 0:21:08"They're the nice people that give us flip-flops, water and lollipops."
0:21:08 > 0:21:12I think, at worst, it's, "Oh, well, here come the bunch of busybodies."
0:21:15 > 0:21:18How you doing? Do you want a hand up? Or are you...?
0:21:18 > 0:21:21You all right? You've only got one ladder.
0:21:21 > 0:21:23I think you did quite well there.
0:21:24 > 0:21:27How do I feel about young people going out drinking?
0:21:27 > 0:21:29It's a sin! They should all be at home!
0:21:29 > 0:21:31No, I don't think that. Of course not.
0:21:31 > 0:21:35Young people going out drinking? That's me! Well, it was.
0:21:35 > 0:21:36It's not any more.
0:21:45 > 0:21:48It's a quieter, more reflective evening in Much Wenlock.
0:21:49 > 0:21:54Dealing with dementia in his parish and personal life has prompted
0:21:54 > 0:21:56Matthew to find ways for the church to help.
0:21:58 > 0:22:04What is the first word that pops into your head when you heard the
0:22:04 > 0:22:08- word "dementia"?- Forgetfulness.
0:22:08 > 0:22:11He's invited Dave, a dementia champion,
0:22:11 > 0:22:15to share ideas about caring for loved ones with the illness.
0:22:15 > 0:22:20We have an expression in our house, and it's a text that we send one another when we've been to the home
0:22:20 > 0:22:25to visit. We'll say, "Oh, Dad's had a real away with the mixer day today."
0:22:25 > 0:22:30You know, it's... That the expression that we use.
0:22:30 > 0:22:32You know, but it's just a way of coping.
0:22:32 > 0:22:37Dementia affects 850,000 people across the UK.
0:22:39 > 0:22:42As the average age of worshippers increases,
0:22:42 > 0:22:44it's an issue the church can't ignore.
0:22:46 > 0:22:49When my mother was in the home, she had this lady sitting next to her,
0:22:49 > 0:22:51and she insisted it was her sister.
0:22:51 > 0:22:54"This is my sister, I'm looking after her."
0:22:54 > 0:22:57Dad, he vividly sees things and you just...
0:22:57 > 0:23:02It's a difficult one, because there's those that say you're wrong
0:23:02 > 0:23:07to collude, but equally there are occasions where you're far better
0:23:07 > 0:23:10colluding, rather than bringing them back into reality.
0:23:10 > 0:23:13Because, actually, it increases their stress level.
0:23:13 > 0:23:16- That's right, yes.- That's what it says in the book that I've got.
0:23:18 > 0:23:21For me, this evening, it was quite enlightening
0:23:21 > 0:23:26to actually hear other people's stories and experiences.
0:23:26 > 0:23:32Anything that we can do as a church to pastorally support these people,
0:23:32 > 0:23:36I'm going to go all out to make that my mission,
0:23:36 > 0:23:41because it's impacting on me too and I like to think that because,
0:23:41 > 0:23:45obviously, we are supporting somebody with dementia,
0:23:45 > 0:23:50that puts you in a better place and a stronger position to support those
0:23:50 > 0:23:52in a similar situation.
0:24:07 > 0:24:11Back on the streets of Hereford, Matthew is busy saving soles.
0:24:11 > 0:24:13Flippy flops!
0:24:13 > 0:24:15Thank you!
0:24:15 > 0:24:20Around 700 pairs of flip-flops are handed out in the city every year.
0:24:20 > 0:24:23- Oh, look at that. Look at those. - Hello.- Wonderful pink flip-flops.
0:24:23 > 0:24:26- Yes, they're from the church. - Size five to six.
0:24:26 > 0:24:28- Yeah.- Or medium.- They're medium.
0:24:30 > 0:24:32With pubs calling last orders,
0:24:32 > 0:24:35the atmosphere is starting to get a little tense.
0:24:35 > 0:24:39It's got to that kind of time of the evening when things do start
0:24:39 > 0:24:42- to happen.- Whoa, whoa, whoa.- Yeah, well, we don't get involved in that.
0:24:42 > 0:24:46- OK.- So we'll move over here. - It feels prickly tonight.
0:24:46 > 0:24:49Well, fingers crossed, it'll be all right.
0:24:49 > 0:24:53If it's not, they'll end up down the shop.
0:24:53 > 0:24:55Night, then.
0:24:56 > 0:25:01One thing that I'm learning tonight is how many different words there are for a bit of a fight.
0:25:01 > 0:25:03Fracas, argy-bargy...
0:25:03 > 0:25:06What you don't want to do is call the police necessarily to handbags.
0:25:06 > 0:25:11- But you definitely want to call them to...- A fracas? - A fracas. Yeah.- OK.
0:25:11 > 0:25:16Last year, the Hereford teams helped over 400 serious incidents.
0:25:16 > 0:25:20Fortunately, tonight, there's been more blisters than bust-ups.
0:25:23 > 0:25:24Well done, Matthew.
0:25:24 > 0:25:26- Thanks, Rob.- Oh, yeah.
0:25:26 > 0:25:30Six hours and 16 pairs of flip-flops later...
0:25:30 > 0:25:32How are you feeling?
0:25:32 > 0:25:34Stiff, sore, tired.
0:25:36 > 0:25:39I think four o'clock in the morning is definitely a test
0:25:39 > 0:25:44- of anyone's Christian character. - Night-night, folks.- Good night.
0:25:46 > 0:25:48I do this because this is my parish.
0:25:48 > 0:25:52And part of where I serve
0:25:52 > 0:25:56has a night-time economy that results in people going out,
0:25:56 > 0:25:59having one too many every now and again, and they need help.
0:26:00 > 0:26:03It's not about people finding God, it's not about people coming
0:26:03 > 0:26:05to church on a Sunday because we've given them
0:26:05 > 0:26:08a lollipop, it's about the living out of our Christian service.
0:26:18 > 0:26:21Looking after people at all the different stages of life can be
0:26:21 > 0:26:24challenging, but community,
0:26:24 > 0:26:28church and of course family can ease life's most difficult passages.
0:26:28 > 0:26:30Happy birthday, Dad.
0:26:30 > 0:26:34# Happy birthday to you. #
0:26:34 > 0:26:37- And how old...?- Plenty of cards. - Plenty of cards.
0:26:37 > 0:26:39And how old are you today?
0:26:40 > 0:26:42- 79.- Yay!
0:26:43 > 0:26:46Today isn't just Charlie's birthday.
0:26:46 > 0:26:48So are you ready, then?
0:26:48 > 0:26:50It's also Matthew's.
0:26:50 > 0:26:51After three.
0:26:51 > 0:26:56# Happy birthday to us, happy birthday to us... #
0:26:56 > 0:26:59You do cherish the moment because you don't know whether
0:26:59 > 0:27:03you're going to share another birthday with him.
0:27:03 > 0:27:05# Happy birthday to us. #
0:27:05 > 0:27:09There we go. So, anyway, you and I have got something in common now,
0:27:09 > 0:27:12Dad, because I've just chopped my leg off.
0:27:14 > 0:27:16Not only do we share the same birthday,
0:27:16 > 0:27:18we've both only got one leg.
0:27:18 > 0:27:20So we're all right.
0:27:20 > 0:27:22I genuinely love him to...
0:27:22 > 0:27:24To bits. I couldn't ask
0:27:24 > 0:27:27for a finer father-in-law because he is...
0:27:27 > 0:27:31He is what he is, there's no sides to Charlie Atkinson.
0:27:31 > 0:27:34You know, what you see is what you get.
0:27:34 > 0:27:38- Is that all right? - Yeah.- That's your treat.
0:27:38 > 0:27:40So don't say I don't do anything for you.
0:27:40 > 0:27:42We've been doing this
0:27:42 > 0:27:48for 14 years, and I don't begrudge it, you know, one bit.
0:27:48 > 0:27:51Because, to me, that's what...
0:27:52 > 0:27:55What family is all about, looking out for one another,
0:27:55 > 0:27:58and that's what we'll always do for Charlie.
0:28:04 > 0:28:08Next time, Ruth battles to save local services...
0:28:08 > 0:28:12I really believe that this is where we should be putting our resources.
0:28:12 > 0:28:13..Matthew mucks in on the farm...
0:28:13 > 0:28:16I'm worried there might be a stampede!
0:28:16 > 0:28:19..and Nicolas is in a festive mood.
0:28:19 > 0:28:21It's the season to be jolly!