0:00:11 > 0:00:14We all know that we use our brains, our minds, all the time.
0:00:14 > 0:00:17I'm using mine now, looking at things going past the window,
0:00:17 > 0:00:19waving my hands about in the air, talking to you.
0:00:19 > 0:00:21You're using yours watching and listening.
0:00:21 > 0:00:24But we don't really think about how we use our brains.
0:00:24 > 0:00:26We don't think about thinking.
0:00:28 > 0:00:32Despite masses of research we're still a long way from
0:00:32 > 0:00:34understanding the brain, our minds.
0:00:34 > 0:00:38Surprisingly much of what we do know
0:00:38 > 0:00:43has been discovered observing the effect of brain damage.
0:00:43 > 0:00:47I'm going to spend some time now with Sir Stirling Moss who is
0:00:47 > 0:00:49a racing driver of some renown.
0:00:49 > 0:00:52You almost certainly know the name, and if you don't, you will soon.
0:00:52 > 0:00:55"Ladies and gentlemen, Stirling Moss."
0:00:58 > 0:01:02In 1962 he had a crash and damaged his spine.
0:01:02 > 0:01:07He did it crashing at 180-mph on a race track.
0:01:07 > 0:01:09I did it crashing at hundreds of miles per hour
0:01:09 > 0:01:11in a jet propelled dragster.
0:01:11 > 0:01:14I know, it was asking for trouble, but people damage their brains
0:01:14 > 0:01:16falling off ladders, crashing bicycles.
0:01:16 > 0:01:21In fact every year in the UK over one million people will be
0:01:21 > 0:01:23hospitalised with brain injury.
0:01:23 > 0:01:27But the recovery, the business of getting it working again,
0:01:27 > 0:01:29there's a lot of commonalities there,
0:01:29 > 0:01:33and I want to talk to Sir Stirling about how he went about it.
0:01:35 > 0:01:38I can't believe we're here...
0:01:39 > 0:01:40Stirling Moss's house!
0:01:49 > 0:01:52Right, let's go meet a legend.
0:01:55 > 0:01:56Hello?
0:01:56 > 0:01:59- Sir Stirling?- Yes? - Hello, it's Richard Hammond.
0:01:59 > 0:02:01- Oh, hang on.- I'm hanging.
0:02:05 > 0:02:08Morning, morning, nice to see you Stirling, how are you?
0:02:08 > 0:02:10- It's a bit chilly. - Yes, it is a bit nippy.
0:02:10 > 0:02:13- Sorry about them, we're recording everything. Ignore them.- So...
0:02:13 > 0:02:16- Right, which one are we going in? - You're in here, Sir.
0:02:16 > 0:02:18Oh, god we've got the...
0:02:18 > 0:02:19- See it's comfortable.- Right.
0:02:22 > 0:02:26On the way to the interview studio, Stirling showed me that even
0:02:26 > 0:02:30in his 80s, he's lost none of his boyish enthusiasm for the sport
0:02:30 > 0:02:31that made him.
0:02:31 > 0:02:38Motor racing, I mean, is exciting and the excitement really is being able
0:02:38 > 0:02:42to set a car up and then drive it a bit better than the other guy can.
0:02:42 > 0:02:47I can't tell you, there's no other thing that gives me that same lift.
0:02:48 > 0:02:51The important thing to me always was to get the respect
0:02:51 > 0:02:52of the other drivers.
0:02:52 > 0:02:57That is the most important... If they felt that I was the man to beat,
0:02:57 > 0:02:59that gave me everything I wanted really.
0:03:02 > 0:03:07There's no question - in the late '50s and early '60s Stirling Moss
0:03:07 > 0:03:09WAS the man to beat.
0:03:09 > 0:03:12So, a fearsome competitor and a charismatic winner.
0:03:12 > 0:03:16Mixing fast cars, exotic locations and a glamorous following
0:03:16 > 0:03:20meant Stirling Moss became one of the UK's
0:03:20 > 0:03:22first sporting superstars.
0:03:22 > 0:03:27And in the process, moved motor racing, from a gentlemen's hobby
0:03:27 > 0:03:32to the professional, cut-throat circus it is today.
0:03:36 > 0:03:40'And Stirling Moss has achieved the ambition of a lifetime.'
0:03:45 > 0:03:47This is the make-up suite...
0:03:47 > 0:03:50You know you're bald when they continue make up round the back
0:03:50 > 0:03:52of your head. It think it's a bit wrong.
0:03:52 > 0:03:56- Hello! Pauline, Stirling, Stirling, Pauline.- Make-up lady? Good.
0:03:56 > 0:03:58Please, go first, I'll sit here and annoy you.
0:03:58 > 0:03:59What have you got there?
0:03:59 > 0:04:02- Do you want some fibre-lift protective volumiser?- Oh, great.
0:04:02 > 0:04:05- Yeah, I'm a big fan of that. - Do you eat it or put it on?
0:04:05 > 0:04:07I have no idea...
0:04:07 > 0:04:09She's got a lot of work to do, to repair up there.
0:04:09 > 0:04:11I wish you'd let me do your make up...
0:04:11 > 0:04:14I'd like to feel your hands on my head.
0:04:14 > 0:04:17And you didn't actually look into the mirror, until afterwards.
0:04:19 > 0:04:23- Should we change places, Pauline? - Yes, please.
0:04:23 > 0:04:26Why does he get the manly, "just slap it on his balding pate...
0:04:26 > 0:04:29"there you go that's big mechanical make up" and...
0:04:29 > 0:04:32She doesn't go around the back of your head to finish the make up!
0:04:32 > 0:04:33Why doesn't she?
0:04:36 > 0:04:39If I give you mine, will you clean them for me?
0:04:39 > 0:04:41Right, I'll put that there...
0:04:41 > 0:04:43My father was a dentist.
0:04:43 > 0:04:45Yes, I know. So you lost four?
0:04:45 > 0:04:51- And that was an early shunt wasn't it?- Yes, a wheel came off in Naples.
0:04:51 > 0:04:54That night my father flew me home, and two knocked out,
0:04:54 > 0:04:57and two broke. And so he pulled the other two out right then and there.
0:04:57 > 0:05:00- Right, so how old were you when that came out?- 19.
0:05:00 > 0:05:03Ah, well, any 19 year old man, losing his teeth is going to feel...
0:05:03 > 0:05:06Yes, pretty difficult with girls you know, because of the gap.
0:05:06 > 0:05:09Especially with your extra-curricular determination,
0:05:09 > 0:05:12- it would have stood in your way. - Luckily, he was a good dentist
0:05:12 > 0:05:13so they matched!
0:05:13 > 0:05:15We should go and sit down in that room.
0:05:15 > 0:05:20Look at that, magnificent isn't it? Only the best for you.
0:05:20 > 0:05:23- Oh, god, it's huge isn't it? - Afternoon everybody.
0:05:37 > 0:05:40Is it fair to say, Stirling, there's a good place to start,
0:05:40 > 0:05:46is it fair to say that you've always considered the reason
0:05:46 > 0:05:50for your immense success as a racing driver and accolades
0:05:50 > 0:05:53as the greatest ever, it is down to this as much as anything else?
0:05:53 > 0:05:57- It's down to what's in there.- Yes, because that controls everything.
0:05:57 > 0:06:01I mean when you... one has to realise that one's brain is what tells
0:06:01 > 0:06:03you to move your finger, I mean, it's as simple as that.
0:06:03 > 0:06:08Therefore, that brain is telling you how much to turn in, when
0:06:08 > 0:06:11to fill her off, when to put the foot down more, so therefore it has to be.
0:06:11 > 0:06:15Yeah, but why is your brain able to do that better
0:06:15 > 0:06:16than another man's brain.
0:06:16 > 0:06:19Is it a better brain or is it a particular type of brain?
0:06:19 > 0:06:21I think it's a particular type.
0:06:21 > 0:06:24I think you take what you've got, and then you try to improve on it.
0:06:24 > 0:06:30So is it then, a result of a crude experience perhaps beyond
0:06:30 > 0:06:34simply racing. Is it a combination of experiences outside your box
0:06:34 > 0:06:35in the competition?
0:06:35 > 0:06:38I know you had a tough time at one of your schools.
0:06:38 > 0:06:41Did all these inform you as a man, that that's part of this?
0:06:41 > 0:06:45I think they way you are composed which comes from the
0:06:45 > 0:06:47life you have led, and the way you have been brought up.
0:06:47 > 0:06:50I think all of those things obviously help.
0:06:50 > 0:06:53I think the fact I was sympathetic towards what motor racing was,
0:06:53 > 0:06:58because of my father and mother being in there, gave me a leg up.
0:06:58 > 0:07:02Both of Stirling's parents were into motor sport, his dad was known
0:07:02 > 0:07:10as the 'racing dentist'. Winning and being brave was instilled at
0:07:10 > 0:07:16an early age, whether on a horse or in a boxing ring... aged four!
0:07:16 > 0:07:20My father would put me into the thing, you know four year old
0:07:20 > 0:07:24boxing and I went in there and I want to win. I don't want to just
0:07:24 > 0:07:26be beaten around, I want to win.
0:07:26 > 0:07:27That's what I'm there for.
0:07:27 > 0:07:29Whether I like boxing or not
0:07:29 > 0:07:32is irrelevant, what I want to do is beat the man I'm against.
0:07:32 > 0:07:34Spotting Stirling's competitive streak,
0:07:34 > 0:07:38his father let the 18 year old loose in a race car.
0:07:38 > 0:07:44He won his first competitive drive and there began a lifetime's craving
0:07:44 > 0:07:47for the danger of racing and the joy of winning.
0:07:47 > 0:07:51'And the Moroccan Grand Prix of 1958 goes to Stirling Moss.'
0:07:53 > 0:07:55I mean, I love motor racing.
0:07:55 > 0:07:58I love the sport, I like the danger is an important...
0:07:58 > 0:08:02I mean when you're a kid, I was racing because I liked the danger.
0:08:02 > 0:08:05The danger was something that made it really important.
0:08:05 > 0:08:09It was something, if I make a mistake this is serious, and somehow
0:08:09 > 0:08:13that increased my pleasure of being able to race.
0:08:13 > 0:08:17I mean if I can go into a corner and come out one yard,
0:08:17 > 0:08:21or five feet or something ahead of the man behind or gain that much,
0:08:21 > 0:08:23I'd feel like a million dollars.
0:08:26 > 0:08:29Our brains have a reward pathway, evolved
0:08:29 > 0:08:34to encourage beneficial actions, like eating, sex or winning.
0:08:34 > 0:08:38Victory triggers Stirling's brain to release a feel-good
0:08:38 > 0:08:39chemical called dopamine.
0:08:39 > 0:08:44The sense of satisfaction and wellbeing motivates the desire
0:08:44 > 0:08:49to do it again. For top racers like Moss, the pleasure of winning,
0:08:49 > 0:08:53is amplified by the adrenaline type rush of risking death.
0:08:53 > 0:08:58In the 50s and 60s it was often just around the corner.
0:09:07 > 0:09:10In the 50s, because we were racing on ordinary roads,
0:09:10 > 0:09:14if you made a mistake, any one mistake could be your last mistake.
0:09:16 > 0:09:19There were an average of three to four you know, good drivers,
0:09:19 > 0:09:23top drivers killed every year, throughout the '50s.
0:09:23 > 0:09:27In 1957 Tony Brooks crashed out at Le Mans.
0:09:27 > 0:09:31Less than a month later he and Moss would be team-mates
0:09:31 > 0:09:33at the British Grand Prix.
0:09:33 > 0:09:36'Tony Brooks' excursion into the sand at Terre Creuse
0:09:36 > 0:09:38'and the leg injury he received
0:09:38 > 0:09:42'was to have an important bearing on the British Grand Prix at entry.'
0:09:42 > 0:09:46Brooks and Moss were racing a car each for the Vanwall team,
0:09:46 > 0:09:49but Brooks was still suffering.
0:09:49 > 0:09:53Stirling started in poll position, then his car failed.
0:09:53 > 0:09:58Drivers could switch cars back then, so Moss took over from Brooks.
0:09:58 > 0:10:01'Still stiff and sore from his Le Mans injuries, Tony
0:10:01 > 0:10:03'was not sorry to hand over
0:10:03 > 0:10:07'to Stirling, who was in the cockpit almost before Tony was out of it.'
0:10:07 > 0:10:10The race now became a master class from Stirling.
0:10:10 > 0:10:14'Moss is always at his best when the odds are against him and he set off
0:10:14 > 0:10:17'on one of the most 'Stirling' drives of his career.'
0:10:17 > 0:10:20He gained 12 seconds, four places and went on
0:10:20 > 0:10:25to win in a characteristically determined display of concentration.
0:10:25 > 0:10:29'He's already acknowledging the cheers of the crowd and they raise
0:10:29 > 0:10:31'and cheer to our man, watch it!'
0:10:36 > 0:10:38I guess motor racing is unique as a sport because it's
0:10:38 > 0:10:42this level of concentration that is sustained for hour after hour
0:10:42 > 0:10:44and your races were...
0:10:44 > 0:10:46Well, up to ten hours. Although in Mille it was over ten
0:10:46 > 0:10:49hours and Formula One were all three hour minimum.
0:10:49 > 0:10:53So three to ten hours of concentrating at a level
0:10:53 > 0:10:55that you never do in anything else.
0:10:55 > 0:10:58Other sports, tennis they concentrate very hard
0:10:58 > 0:11:00but then they have a nice sit down and...
0:11:00 > 0:11:03Yes, you know in racing obviously you can't, I mean your life's
0:11:03 > 0:11:06dependent on it, so that's the one thing in your favour,
0:11:06 > 0:11:10is that when you might be killed you pay more attention, know what I mean?
0:11:10 > 0:11:12Well, you're really concentrating...
0:11:12 > 0:11:15- Exactly. You don't want to go that way.- Let's just look
0:11:15 > 0:11:17at the Mille Miglia.
0:11:17 > 0:11:21In the early '50s the race that demanded more concentration
0:11:21 > 0:11:25than most was the infamous Italian road race, the Mille Miglia.
0:11:25 > 0:11:31Some 800 cars raced 1,000 miles around central Italy,
0:11:31 > 0:11:34with excited crowds lining the winding route.
0:11:34 > 0:11:40- It was a recipe for disaster! - Look at the people, do you see?
0:11:40 > 0:11:44Look at that. I mean I do not like
0:11:44 > 0:11:47driving towards people, you know at that sort of speed I mean it really
0:11:47 > 0:11:51is quite an awful thing because you just don't want to touch somebody.
0:11:51 > 0:11:56As well as avoiding enthusiastic spectators, the other hazard
0:11:56 > 0:11:57needing extra attention,
0:11:57 > 0:12:02was the other drivers. The race was open to all-comers.
0:12:02 > 0:12:05You might say to your friend, when you're in the pub
0:12:05 > 0:12:07let's go in this and have a go, and of course they could.
0:12:07 > 0:12:10If you had a car and were around there, you could get a number
0:12:10 > 0:12:12on the side and you'd be off!
0:12:12 > 0:12:18With all that to contend with, driver concentration was intense.
0:12:18 > 0:12:23In the 1955 race, Stirling's extraordinary ability to concentrate
0:12:23 > 0:12:26created an unusual problem.
0:12:26 > 0:12:28On this concentration point,
0:12:28 > 0:12:31the story runs that when in the Mille Miglia they
0:12:31 > 0:12:34were attempting a system where by you could communicate
0:12:34 > 0:12:36with your co-driver through headphones.
0:12:36 > 0:12:38- Yes.- Quite technologically advanced at the time, I imagine?
0:12:38 > 0:12:41Yes, but that didn't work. I mean, we tried that out and I was
0:12:41 > 0:12:44speaking to someone long, long after that and they said
0:12:44 > 0:12:49when you're really concentrating you don't feel pain or hear things.
0:12:49 > 0:12:54I mean it's what you see, so it just wouldn't work.
0:12:57 > 0:13:01When concentrating, the higher reasoning part of the brain,
0:13:01 > 0:13:05the frontal cortex, diverts attention to inputs demanding
0:13:05 > 0:13:09the most thought, the most effort.
0:13:09 > 0:13:11The effect is to ignore other inputs.
0:13:11 > 0:13:15You know, "men can only do one thing at a time" kind of thing.
0:13:15 > 0:13:18Well, it's medical. That's the way our brains work.
0:13:18 > 0:13:23Moss was concentrating so much on the road ahead that his brain
0:13:23 > 0:13:25was blanking out the sounds around him.
0:13:25 > 0:13:29He was even "deaf" to the instructions of his navigator,
0:13:29 > 0:13:33Dennis Jenkinson, Jenks, who was in the seat beside him.
0:13:33 > 0:13:36You came up with a solution, didn't you to the problem of you couldn't
0:13:36 > 0:13:39- hear because your brain zoned it out?- Yes, we had this thing,
0:13:39 > 0:13:42the gadget, we had this thing we called the toilet roll.
0:13:42 > 0:13:44Which is this thing here.
0:13:44 > 0:13:47Now on that, that was Jenk's information pad.
0:13:47 > 0:13:51As we went along he would just wind this on, and he would see
0:13:51 > 0:13:52whatever it is coming flat out.
0:13:52 > 0:13:55He would interpret that by into hand signals.
0:13:55 > 0:13:58If he wanted me to go slower he would go like 'this' slower,
0:13:58 > 0:14:02and then he'd speed it up however much more he wanted me to slow.
0:14:02 > 0:14:05And this wasn't necessarily because of the noise which was tremendous
0:14:05 > 0:14:06I should imagine, this was
0:14:06 > 0:14:10because your brain had prioritised visual was all it was interested in.
0:14:10 > 0:14:12Exactly, I could see him in the corner of my eye and I'm
0:14:12 > 0:14:15concentrating down the road but I could see his signals
0:14:15 > 0:14:18because he put his hand far enough forward I could see it.
0:14:18 > 0:14:22The brilliant, yet simple hand signals from his navigator
0:14:22 > 0:14:26solved the problem of Moss being unable to hear when concentrating.
0:14:26 > 0:14:30The pair went on to famously win the Mille Miglia in record time,
0:14:30 > 0:14:37clocking an astonishing average speed of 97.8 miles an hour.
0:14:37 > 0:14:41But racing at these speeds not only demands extreme concentration,
0:14:41 > 0:14:44it also requires that when concentrating, the brain
0:14:44 > 0:14:48must process huge quantities of ever changing inputs.
0:14:52 > 0:14:55Once the flag falls and then you're off, and you've got to...
0:14:55 > 0:14:59you're watching where people are, can I dash in there, should I hold
0:14:59 > 0:15:02back here, wait till we go round the corner, you know, all the time
0:15:02 > 0:15:05trying to read the track, so you can work out how you're going to
0:15:05 > 0:15:10pace yourself, you know watching the temperature gauges and seeing
0:15:10 > 0:15:13how the tyres are, so it isn't just a case of being able
0:15:13 > 0:15:15to hold your foot on the floor.
0:15:19 > 0:15:21This "racing brain",
0:15:21 > 0:15:25able to compute lots of data quickly, is a characteristic
0:15:25 > 0:15:30of all top drivers, both in Stirling's era and today.
0:15:32 > 0:15:37Professor Sid Watkins is motor racing's best known neurosurgeon
0:15:37 > 0:15:41and remains astonished by how a driver's brain processes the mass
0:15:41 > 0:15:45of information that bombards it.
0:15:45 > 0:15:49I make a lot of jokes about, you know what is a neurosurgeon doing round
0:15:49 > 0:15:53racing drivers because they've obviously got no brain,
0:15:53 > 0:15:57but in fact, they are a very highly intelligent group.
0:15:57 > 0:16:01They take all of the data that is coming in to them, from the body,
0:16:01 > 0:16:07from the way the head is moving on a neck and their computers
0:16:07 > 0:16:10come out with the right solution.
0:16:10 > 0:16:15I have first hand experience of this need for high speed data processing
0:16:15 > 0:16:19in a race car, and I can safely say it's just like Sid tells it.
0:16:19 > 0:16:20And I can't do it.
0:16:20 > 0:16:26I'm going to try and... OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD!
0:16:29 > 0:16:32No! There's no temperature in the brakes.
0:16:35 > 0:16:38My thinking time, that was my problem, where I had a bit of
0:16:38 > 0:16:41an off, it's because I thought I'd left it too long to brake.
0:16:41 > 0:16:44Then I realised I hadn't, but because I was thinking that, the car
0:16:44 > 0:16:48was already around the corner and I was in the wrong gear and I span.
0:16:48 > 0:16:50I can't think fast enough, more than anything.
0:16:50 > 0:16:52The thing to remember more than anything
0:16:52 > 0:16:54is there's professionals and amateur.
0:16:54 > 0:16:57That's the point. Of my era, of when you tried,
0:16:57 > 0:17:01any time you like, there's a big gap between the very best amateur
0:17:01 > 0:17:04and the very poorest, you know, professional.
0:17:04 > 0:17:05It's rather like a singer.
0:17:05 > 0:17:10I mean, anybody can sing but only a few people sing really well
0:17:10 > 0:17:12and they get trained and it gets better,
0:17:12 > 0:17:14and I think the same thing with racing, experience
0:17:14 > 0:17:16is an enormous benefit.
0:17:16 > 0:17:19What I try to do is, against you in the same vehicle,
0:17:19 > 0:17:21is I try to say to the car,
0:17:21 > 0:17:25OK I'm going to try and benefit from this with my experience, and that is
0:17:25 > 0:17:28why I'm likely to get in that car and go faster than you would.
0:17:28 > 0:17:30'And the flag falls for Stirling Moss,
0:17:30 > 0:17:33'to mark his third victory in the Monaco Grand Prix...'
0:17:33 > 0:17:37Monaco's winding street circuit is the most testing
0:17:37 > 0:17:38for a driver's brain.
0:17:38 > 0:17:42By the time of Stirling's third win here, he had ten years
0:17:42 > 0:17:44experience of over 500 races.
0:17:44 > 0:17:49His brain had changed... learning to process the data bombarding
0:17:49 > 0:17:51his senses more efficiently.
0:17:53 > 0:17:56You don't just get in a racing car and become an expert driver,
0:17:56 > 0:17:59it's all about, as I suppose in life, it's all about practice.
0:17:59 > 0:18:02You know 5 % inspiration, 95% perspiration.
0:18:02 > 0:18:06We can assume that racing drivers, those parts of the brain are going
0:18:06 > 0:18:09to be more developed than other people, because they have
0:18:09 > 0:18:11practised it over and over again,
0:18:11 > 0:18:15Practising an action improves the brain's performance...
0:18:15 > 0:18:20and the body's. ultimately, we can unconsciously perform complex
0:18:20 > 0:18:23actions, they become automatic.
0:18:23 > 0:18:26If I swing at you, you're going to duck.
0:18:26 > 0:18:29If you don't, you're hit. So obviously you duck.
0:18:29 > 0:18:35Well, in motor racing to me, I went out there and I did it automatically.
0:18:35 > 0:18:39If you're going to really fast and get things to go with the flow,
0:18:39 > 0:18:43then it has be something you do, without realising you're doing it.
0:18:43 > 0:18:47And it's well known that a lot of automatic unconscious movement is
0:18:47 > 0:18:51actually quicker, than if you actually have to think about moving.
0:18:55 > 0:19:00Brain research has proved, unconscious reactions are quicker
0:19:00 > 0:19:02than conscious ones.
0:19:02 > 0:19:07It's called the gunfighter dilemma and it goes like this.
0:19:10 > 0:19:14The gunfighter that draws first draws slower
0:19:14 > 0:19:17because he thinks about it.
0:19:17 > 0:19:22The automatic reaction of the second guy is quicker.
0:19:22 > 0:19:27Experiments have revealed that a reflex reaction takes a different,
0:19:27 > 0:19:32shorter pathway through the brain than a conscious thought.
0:19:32 > 0:19:34It makes sense, when you think about it.
0:19:34 > 0:19:39Thinking about drawing the gun takes longer than just doing it.
0:19:39 > 0:19:43Have you ever heard of, it's a theory based around Gunfighters
0:19:43 > 0:19:45or Gunslingers and it was an experiment that was done,
0:19:45 > 0:19:50the theory runs that the second person to draw in a gunfight,
0:19:50 > 0:19:53will actually be faster than the first person.
0:19:53 > 0:19:55- Is that relevant to...? - I think it is.
0:19:55 > 0:19:58I think if a driver has to think about it, I mean the reason
0:19:58 > 0:20:00I couldn't continue after my accident
0:20:00 > 0:20:03is because I knew exactly what to do, but I had to think what to do.
0:20:03 > 0:20:06I knew I had to turn in here. Where did I turn in?
0:20:06 > 0:20:09I turned in 100 metres away. Where did I aim for?
0:20:09 > 0:20:13I aimed for exactly... whereas before it was all automatic.
0:20:14 > 0:20:19So Stirling's brain was acting automatically so extra quickly.
0:20:19 > 0:20:25Along with his courage, his ability to concentrate with intensity
0:20:25 > 0:20:29for long periods, and by now, his considerable experience
0:20:29 > 0:20:32it was perhaps inevitable he'd rise to the top of his profession.
0:20:32 > 0:20:35'And Stirling with his favourite number seven, wins the Grand Prix
0:20:35 > 0:20:37of Europe, by sheer brilliance.'
0:20:37 > 0:20:42And he might well have stayed there but for a dark day in 1962.
0:20:45 > 0:20:48It was April 24th, Easter Monday.
0:20:48 > 0:20:52The top drivers of the day gathered at the Goodwood Race circuit
0:20:52 > 0:20:56for the 100 mile Formula One event, the Glover Trophy.
0:20:56 > 0:21:0233 years old and in his prime, Stirling strutted his stuff,
0:21:02 > 0:21:05sparring with rival Graham Hill even before the race began.
0:21:08 > 0:21:12On poll position, in his lucky number seven lotus at the track
0:21:12 > 0:21:15that was the scene of his very first circuit victory,
0:21:15 > 0:21:17Stirling was bristling with confidence.
0:21:17 > 0:21:21what could possibly go wrong? three laps from the finish, not
0:21:21 > 0:21:27in contention for a win but as ever pushing hard for a lap record,
0:21:27 > 0:21:30Moss went to pass Hill at St Mary's corner.
0:21:30 > 0:21:34Going around 100mph he left the track
0:21:34 > 0:21:38and ended up smashing head-first into the banking.
0:21:53 > 0:21:54Stirling is still unconscious.
0:21:54 > 0:21:59He's been unconscious ever since the accident, the mystery as to exactly
0:21:59 > 0:22:04what caused this accident remains, but a rather disturbing thought
0:22:04 > 0:22:07is that perhaps we shall never know because the chances are that
0:22:07 > 0:22:09Stirling who has a concussion,
0:22:09 > 0:22:13a broken left leg and a cracked rib, as well as gashes around the face,
0:22:13 > 0:22:15might himself never remember.
0:22:17 > 0:22:19Your memories of the actual crash?
0:22:19 > 0:22:23I have none of them. I have amnesia of four weeks.
0:22:23 > 0:22:26I remember chatting up a bird the night before at a cocktail party,
0:22:26 > 0:22:28a South African lady,
0:22:28 > 0:22:30and then the next thing I remember
0:22:30 > 0:22:33is coming to in the hospital, which was a month later.
0:22:33 > 0:22:36I mean, I didn't know it was a month, and I assumed straight away
0:22:36 > 0:22:38that I would be racing in the next couple,
0:22:38 > 0:22:42two or three weeks because I had done that before. That had happened.
0:22:42 > 0:22:44Otherwise I don't remember anything else.
0:22:44 > 0:22:47That was the most expensive day of my life. I had to work for a living,
0:22:47 > 0:22:50until then I was being paid to do what I liked.
0:22:50 > 0:22:52Suddenly I had to work for a living so it was pretty
0:22:52 > 0:22:54come down to Earth all of a sudden.
0:22:54 > 0:22:57So although you can't remember exactly what happened,
0:22:57 > 0:23:01there was press coverage and there are some staggering photographs,
0:23:01 > 0:23:04if we can find them in here, of you at the time. I'm just...
0:23:04 > 0:23:08- There, here.- Yes.- So this is immediately after it had happened?
0:23:08 > 0:23:11And the interesting thing there, although I was unconscious
0:23:11 > 0:23:14I'm actually holding that nurse's hand.
0:23:14 > 0:23:18I mean, you can see I'm gripping it, rather than just having it out.
0:23:18 > 0:23:22- When they got there did they think, "he's had it"?- I reckon they did
0:23:22 > 0:23:25because I was cramped up, look, the whole front was smashed in,
0:23:25 > 0:23:28as you can see look. This...
0:23:28 > 0:23:31that is actually before that because
0:23:31 > 0:23:35they've obviously just arrived and they haven't pulled my head back.
0:23:35 > 0:23:38I've got the steering wheel, you see, this is the wheel,
0:23:38 > 0:23:41I'll get it up the right way, so that's the way I'd be driving.
0:23:41 > 0:23:44Like this with the thumbs on there, and then my head obviously went
0:23:44 > 0:23:48forward because no seat belts, which is amazing I wasn't thrown out.
0:23:48 > 0:23:52But anyway I went like that and that obviously gave damage, you know,
0:23:52 > 0:23:53struck my head.
0:23:53 > 0:23:55So that was straight impact?
0:23:55 > 0:23:57Yes, and my brain would have gone 'bah-bom' like that,
0:23:57 > 0:24:00when it happened and, you know, that was it.
0:24:00 > 0:24:05So what do you now know did happen?
0:24:05 > 0:24:07Well, I know I went into the bank,
0:24:07 > 0:24:09- I suppose that's the biggest thing. - Yes...
0:24:09 > 0:24:13Well, I was coming up actually, Graham Hill was in front of me...
0:24:13 > 0:24:16'Stirling Moss was following me through Fordwater,
0:24:16 > 0:24:19'a very fast right hand on the back leg of the circuit...'
0:24:19 > 0:24:22And I was a lap behind because I had to stop for the gear box
0:24:22 > 0:24:25so I was trying to un-let myself.
0:24:25 > 0:24:29We were doing about 140-mph and approaching a right-hand
0:24:29 > 0:24:30leading into St. Mary's...
0:24:30 > 0:24:33And I came up, and Graham was on the right...
0:24:33 > 0:24:39At this point we slowed from 140 to 110, brake and drop
0:24:39 > 0:24:40the gear from fifth to fourth.
0:24:42 > 0:24:46And I think they probably gave him a flag saying look somebody
0:24:46 > 0:24:47is going to pass you.
0:24:47 > 0:24:50He may have gone like this because you acknowledge the flag usually,
0:24:50 > 0:24:51or I did certainly.
0:24:51 > 0:24:55I was on the outside of the circuit when I saw Stirling's car out of the
0:24:55 > 0:24:59corner of my eye, on my left with the outside two wheels on the grass.
0:24:59 > 0:25:03I probably saw him doing 'this' thinking he said right, pass me here,
0:25:03 > 0:25:06for he was on the narrow line and normally Graham was one of those
0:25:06 > 0:25:09drivers who went quite wide, took a wide entrance.
0:25:09 > 0:25:12I immediately backed off and saw that he was in great trouble
0:25:12 > 0:25:16and watched his progress across the grass towards the bank.
0:25:18 > 0:25:22You see here's Graham Hill's line, and I would have gone onto the grass,
0:25:22 > 0:25:25the grass was damp and of course but that was a werther then I went
0:25:25 > 0:25:28straight into the bank and you know,
0:25:28 > 0:25:29crashed the car.
0:25:31 > 0:25:33I noticed there were flames coming out of the exhaust pipe,
0:25:33 > 0:25:36and I thought it was rather strange at the time.
0:25:38 > 0:25:42Half an hour went by and we still didn't have any news,
0:25:42 > 0:25:47and the first news we got was when it came over the tannoy, that he'd
0:25:47 > 0:25:52had this accident and was being cut out of the car and of course we were
0:25:52 > 0:25:56shocked and we waited around until we knew what was happening,
0:25:56 > 0:26:01and he was taken in the ambulance and somebody drove me to hospital.
0:26:05 > 0:26:09And then the long vigil started.
0:26:09 > 0:26:12Of course, following your crash there was a lot of photographs of
0:26:12 > 0:26:15it, but there wasn't really straight footage of it?
0:26:15 > 0:26:18No, it was all from the side.
0:26:18 > 0:26:21Because when I did mine, it was being filmed for the television,
0:26:21 > 0:26:22so I have got footage
0:26:22 > 0:26:25- of mine which I have...- Yes, I would like to see that actually.
0:26:25 > 0:26:28We did show this on the telly,
0:26:28 > 0:26:31and we wondered whether to, but do you want the honest truth?
0:26:31 > 0:26:34- Why we did it? It was because... - Because it's interesting.
0:26:34 > 0:26:39Yes, and because if just one person watching, one 17 year old kid
0:26:39 > 0:26:42thinks, crikey, things can go wrong in the world of television,
0:26:42 > 0:26:45even in our silly, controlled world,
0:26:45 > 0:26:46they can go wrong in real life.
0:26:46 > 0:26:50Maybe they will think twice before going round a corner and think maybe
0:26:50 > 0:26:53there will be a tractor with a bailing spike coming round
0:26:53 > 0:26:56the other way, so I'll be careful.
0:26:58 > 0:27:02You should have seen the palaver when the medics let me watch
0:27:02 > 0:27:04this for the first time.
0:27:04 > 0:27:08Bloody hell fire, that's a jet engine.
0:27:08 > 0:27:10Oh, that was the first run.
0:27:10 > 0:27:15Oh, crap. This is terrifying!
0:27:15 > 0:27:18And did you hold, you know, on the brakes?
0:27:18 > 0:27:21- Yeah? You did?- Yeah you build it to a certain point and then...
0:27:21 > 0:27:25Boy, it gets a move on straight away, eh?
0:27:25 > 0:27:29Well, yes, but it accelerates in that way that jet cars do
0:27:29 > 0:27:32which is kind of it builds and builds.
0:27:32 > 0:27:35The initial acceleration is nothing spectacular.
0:27:35 > 0:27:38It doesn't hang about, that.
0:27:43 > 0:27:47Now when you put that chute out, how much does it actually stop you?
0:27:47 > 0:27:49Do you really feel a big G?
0:27:49 > 0:27:52Oh, yes, it's about minus three and a half G it's a proper...
0:27:52 > 0:27:55- Oh, is it? Oh, oh.- But it's quite gentle in its constant, and then it
0:27:55 > 0:27:56sort of drops off.
0:27:56 > 0:27:58- Oh, yeah.- Oh yes!
0:27:58 > 0:28:00I'm SO alive!
0:28:00 > 0:28:04Four months after my accident I returned to the Top Gear studio.
0:28:04 > 0:28:09I talked about my early runs in the jet car and then the crash itself.
0:28:09 > 0:28:12And we had the runway until 5.30... and...
0:28:12 > 0:28:14AUDIENCE LAUGHS
0:28:15 > 0:28:18It is strange watching yourself, when you know you were unwell,
0:28:18 > 0:28:21because watching me there then talk, I don't remember that.
0:28:21 > 0:28:24- I don't remember sitting at all. - Oh, don't you?
0:28:24 > 0:28:30No, not even slightly, but I know that I wasn't very well then.
0:28:37 > 0:28:39Oops. That's when the tyre goes.
0:28:39 > 0:28:42- Sends it off.- Oooh.
0:28:42 > 0:28:45- Cor, blimey!- And that's the point where it goes down, that's when
0:28:45 > 0:28:48I was gone, I thought.
0:28:54 > 0:28:59Good Lord! I'm amazed you got away with it at all actually.
0:29:00 > 0:29:03- That's more bashed up than mine was, wasn't it?- Hm...
0:29:03 > 0:29:05Mine was only a fragment compared to yours.
0:29:05 > 0:29:09I made a more thorough job of the back end of mine compared to yours.
0:29:09 > 0:29:11You can see it start to go...
0:29:11 > 0:29:15and it's just the track to the right...
0:29:15 > 0:29:16And you're trying to steer there.
0:29:16 > 0:29:22- Yes, I was steering but clearly that was never going to work, was it?- No.
0:29:22 > 0:29:25But now tell me, when the wheel...
0:29:25 > 0:29:26when the tyre started to go,
0:29:26 > 0:29:29that must have given you notice, my God, something's up.
0:29:29 > 0:29:33I can't remember. I can remember...
0:29:33 > 0:29:36the problem is you don't know how much your brain reconstructs
0:29:36 > 0:29:38afterwards. You said a couple of things you thought,
0:29:38 > 0:29:41- you had maybe thought of afterwards.- Sure, yes.
0:29:41 > 0:29:44But in the versions of it that ran through my mind, when I was kind of,
0:29:44 > 0:29:49in hospital, in and out of consciousness, there was a real
0:29:49 > 0:29:51sense of fighting something,
0:29:51 > 0:29:54which was when steering was going on.
0:29:55 > 0:29:58I think there was a degree of steering as the tyre fell apart.
0:29:58 > 0:30:00But then when it burst...
0:30:05 > 0:30:07..there was a sense of "this is an emergency."
0:30:07 > 0:30:11I think I had then gone to pull the chute, which didn't deploy
0:30:11 > 0:30:14and the tyre burst and it turned round.
0:30:14 > 0:30:16And then it started to roll...
0:30:20 > 0:30:23As the car achieved that sort of angle I thought, "Well, this is it."
0:30:26 > 0:30:30- What I don't get is why did the chute not go?- I don't know...
0:30:30 > 0:30:32And they never found out?
0:30:32 > 0:30:36No. It didn't deploy possibly because the car was sideways
0:30:36 > 0:30:39and the chute is designed by a drogue to pull it out that way,
0:30:39 > 0:30:41and it kind of...wouldn't.
0:30:51 > 0:30:54- You must have memories of some of your shunts.- Oh, I have.
0:30:54 > 0:30:57In fact I've seen you say it, on that Face To Face interview,
0:30:57 > 0:31:01when you said... He asks you, "Have you ever thought, that's it?"
0:31:01 > 0:31:04- Yes.- And you have?- Yes, oh sure, when my steering broke.
0:31:04 > 0:31:08- Have you ever really thought you were done?- Yes, I have.
0:31:08 > 0:31:12- When?- At Monza, my steering sheared at 165 on this bank track.
0:31:12 > 0:31:15I mean, I knew going at 165 or 170 or whatever it was,
0:31:15 > 0:31:19suddenly, when my arms crossed, there was something wrong. I'm not stupid.
0:31:19 > 0:31:22I'm not normally afraid of killing myself,
0:31:22 > 0:31:24I am frightened of being killed
0:31:24 > 0:31:26by something over which I have no control.
0:31:26 > 0:31:28And I thought, "God this is it."
0:31:28 > 0:31:32I mean, that's it. And I remember closing my eyes and forcing back.
0:31:32 > 0:31:35I was absolutely convinced that I was a goner.
0:31:35 > 0:31:38Well, that's a very similar memory then to when mine went,
0:31:38 > 0:31:40that's what happened to me, I did everything I could...
0:31:40 > 0:31:42Did you black out at all, do you reckon?
0:31:42 > 0:31:46After that, yes, but I've never been able to ask anybody else this,
0:31:46 > 0:31:50but when you've really thought it, and really thought, "That's it,"
0:31:50 > 0:31:53the thing that came out of that memory, was that there was no fear.
0:31:53 > 0:31:55It was the next thing to do on my list.
0:31:55 > 0:31:58If I'd had a to-do list it would have said "Get in car, drive car,
0:31:58 > 0:32:01"crash car, die." And I would have just...
0:32:01 > 0:32:05"Oh, I've got to the die bit now." It felt no more...it felt no more...
0:32:05 > 0:32:08Yes, it opens a thing. I must say, I can remember so well
0:32:08 > 0:32:11closing my eyes and thinking, "Christ, what's going to happen?"
0:32:11 > 0:32:13- Yep.- I'm going to die. - And what happens next?
0:32:13 > 0:32:15What does it mean? How's it going to be?
0:32:15 > 0:32:19Death is something which frightens me,
0:32:19 > 0:32:23and by thinking of it isn't going to make it less likely to happen,
0:32:23 > 0:32:24therefore I don't think about it.
0:32:24 > 0:32:29I was so worried to find out...and that's where the guilt came from.
0:32:29 > 0:32:31Ah, things still come back!
0:32:31 > 0:32:35- The guilt came from thinking it was my fault.- Yeah.
0:32:35 > 0:32:38That's back to what you were saying on the Face To Face interview.
0:32:38 > 0:32:40You're not scared of killing yourself
0:32:40 > 0:32:42- but you're scared of being killed.- Yeah.
0:32:42 > 0:32:46Mechanical failure or whatever. I was so scared...
0:32:46 > 0:32:49I felt so guilty that I'd done something wrong, I'd messed it up,
0:32:49 > 0:32:56so all I wanted to hear was that I hadn't risked leaving my wife
0:32:56 > 0:32:59a widow and daughters without a father because I had cocked up.
0:32:59 > 0:33:02- Which is all you could do. - It's only when they told me
0:33:02 > 0:33:06from the telemetry from the car, they confirmed that I had pulled
0:33:06 > 0:33:09the parachute lever, that's all I wanted to hear.
0:33:09 > 0:33:11I'd rather you than me, old boy.
0:33:11 > 0:33:14Ha! Well, let's face it, I didn't dislodge the right-hand side
0:33:14 > 0:33:17of my brain so let's not get competitive about shunts!
0:33:19 > 0:33:20The papers were full of it,
0:33:20 > 0:33:24the news hounds were there camping out on the doorstep
0:33:24 > 0:33:29and we told everybody, you know, that there was nothing
0:33:29 > 0:33:32that anybody could say - that he was in a coma,
0:33:32 > 0:33:36there wasn't any news and we'd let them know when there was.
0:33:38 > 0:33:40The state of coma, you were in a coma for a month?
0:33:40 > 0:33:44- Yeah, for a month.- I was only for a day or two. But that's a strange...
0:33:44 > 0:33:47- It's not asleep but not awake. - You don't know what's happened.
0:33:47 > 0:33:51- Do you have any coma memories or dreams or anything?- No, none at all.
0:33:51 > 0:33:54'Although a coma appears like a deep sleep,
0:33:54 > 0:33:58'and, in fact it's the Greek word for deep sleep,
0:33:58 > 0:34:02'the brain activity in a coma is very different.
0:34:02 > 0:34:05'It's described as an unconscious state
0:34:05 > 0:34:09'where you can't respond physically to light, sound or pain.
0:34:09 > 0:34:12'You can't wake a person from a coma,
0:34:12 > 0:34:16'they must regain consciousness of their own accord.'
0:34:16 > 0:34:19So you're in a coma for a month,
0:34:19 > 0:34:22I woke up, I don't, I have no recollection but my wife Mindy has,
0:34:22 > 0:34:25she was there when I briefly stirred out of coma...
0:34:25 > 0:34:27The first thing he did was just...
0:34:27 > 0:34:32there was the tube, the ventilator right down...
0:34:32 > 0:34:35and he just got hold of it and was...
0:34:35 > 0:34:39Started pulling that out. Just fighting off intervention.
0:34:39 > 0:34:42- There was nobody in the room?- Yeah, my wife and the medics were there.
0:34:42 > 0:34:45I was fighting them off at the same time I was trying to pull it out.
0:34:45 > 0:34:49I looked at the guy and said, "Well, what...what happens now?
0:34:49 > 0:34:51"Can he cope without it?" He said, "Well, we'll wait and see."
0:34:51 > 0:34:54I was pulling the pipe, which was not pleasant,
0:34:54 > 0:34:57Mindy was saying, "What shall we do?" and they just said, "Well,
0:34:57 > 0:35:00"he'll hurt himself if he keeps fighting with us, let him do it."
0:35:00 > 0:35:04Then because I pulled it out, I couldn't breathe any more and I keeled over again
0:35:04 > 0:35:07I'd rather go the way I did, boy, I wasn't awake to do all that mess.
0:35:07 > 0:35:10- A nice sleep for a month! - Yes, nice and easy.
0:35:13 > 0:35:17'Media interest never let up whilst Stirling lay unconscious.
0:35:17 > 0:35:21'His father Alfred updated reporters,
0:35:21 > 0:35:26'whilst his mother Aileen regularly made visits to be with her son.'
0:35:26 > 0:35:28I held his hand, you know,
0:35:28 > 0:35:31and squeezed it and he squeezed it back,
0:35:31 > 0:35:33and then after a little while
0:35:33 > 0:35:38I said to him, "Hello, darling, it's Mum, can you hear me?" And I THINK,
0:35:38 > 0:35:43I don't think it was imagination that he just muttered, "Mum."
0:35:46 > 0:35:50'Also, in constant attendance, was his secretary and assistant
0:35:50 > 0:35:54'Val "Viper" Pirie. As well as dealing with up to 3,000
0:35:54 > 0:36:00'letters a day, she tried to be at his bedside as much as possible.'
0:36:02 > 0:36:05I was at the hospital and sat with him
0:36:05 > 0:36:11during the days after the accident, all during his coma.
0:36:16 > 0:36:18You sit there and you were told to talk to him
0:36:18 > 0:36:21to try to bring him out of the coma.
0:36:21 > 0:36:26I think they thought that hearing a familiar voice
0:36:26 > 0:36:30would get the brain going, to help them come out of the coma.
0:36:33 > 0:36:37'The common wisdom that talking or reading to someone in a coma
0:36:37 > 0:36:43'may help has not been disproven. In fact, although a patient can't
0:36:43 > 0:36:47'outwardly respond to stimulation of the senses, some recent research
0:36:47 > 0:36:53'has shown that in some cases, the brain is registering inputs.'
0:36:54 > 0:36:56I got him to speak to start with,
0:36:56 > 0:36:59because I was telling him about a chap that was putting in
0:36:59 > 0:37:05an internal vacuum cleaner into the house,
0:37:05 > 0:37:10and this chap was not terribly good.
0:37:10 > 0:37:16And I was regaling Stirling with the latest up... on-goings of the house
0:37:16 > 0:37:20and what this chap had been up to and I said, you know,
0:37:20 > 0:37:23"He's a real bastard! A real bastard!"
0:37:23 > 0:37:26And I heard this little voice say, ("Bastard, real bastard").
0:37:28 > 0:37:31So I thought, "Oh, yes, you're going to be all right then!"
0:37:39 > 0:37:42What is your actual first memory of coming out?
0:37:42 > 0:37:45Bearing in mind you've been in coma for weeks and weeks.
0:37:45 > 0:37:48Yes, I was in a coma for a month, four weeks.
0:37:48 > 0:37:51The first thing I remember is waking up, seeing all the flowers in there
0:37:51 > 0:37:55and facetiously saying, "They must have thought I was going to die."
0:37:55 > 0:37:58- Which of course was pretty near the mark.- They did!
0:37:58 > 0:38:00I hadn't realised that at the time.
0:38:00 > 0:38:03My best friend was there and I remember lifting my arm like this
0:38:03 > 0:38:06and he said, "What are you doing that for?" and I said,
0:38:06 > 0:38:09"Well, in case you didn't know, I had an accident four weeks ago
0:38:09 > 0:38:12"and broke my arm," and he said, "No, no you didn't."
0:38:12 > 0:38:15He said, "You banged your head." I said, "Don't be ridiculous,
0:38:15 > 0:38:18"how can banging my head mean I've got to lift this arm around?"
0:38:18 > 0:38:22He said they wouldn't tell me because they were frightened it'd worry me,
0:38:22 > 0:38:25and he said, "I'm afraid that you're paralysed on that side."
0:38:25 > 0:38:27I said, "Don't be ridiculous!"
0:38:27 > 0:38:31So he said, "All right, move your fingers," and, of course, I couldn't.
0:38:31 > 0:38:34That sounds, to me anyway,
0:38:34 > 0:38:37as though you were still in a bit of a confused state at that point.
0:38:37 > 0:38:40Probably, but you don't see it that way do you?
0:38:40 > 0:38:42No, it's reality to you at the time.
0:38:42 > 0:38:46Because it's you and that's all you know. Oh, absolutely, I mean
0:38:46 > 0:38:50it's quite frightening how you can believe one thing but it isn't right
0:38:50 > 0:38:55and I was obviously still, you know, mentally a bit...
0:38:55 > 0:38:57- Mixed up?- Knocked about.
0:39:00 > 0:39:05Coma, classically will move on and people then tend to come out,
0:39:05 > 0:39:09through a period of confusion, and into post traumatic amnesia.
0:39:14 > 0:39:17Memory is no one structure,
0:39:17 > 0:39:21memory is part of an integral system that goes throughout the brain.
0:39:23 > 0:39:25And of course memory is what we judge ourselves by.
0:39:25 > 0:39:27That is where we are in life,
0:39:27 > 0:39:31that is what happened a few minutes ago, that is what we're worth,
0:39:31 > 0:39:34that is who we love, that is what is going on.
0:39:34 > 0:39:36It is very integral to our souls.
0:39:41 > 0:39:44Did you have, I'm just interested at exploring
0:39:44 > 0:39:47different states of mind, post traumatic amnesia?
0:39:47 > 0:39:50- I don't know if that hit you at all. - Yes, yes, I did.
0:39:50 > 0:39:54- Obviously if you can't remember... - I think I've still got it actually!
0:39:54 > 0:39:55I think now it's age orientated!
0:39:55 > 0:39:57I was going to say, "That's called being 80!"
0:39:57 > 0:40:01I think that's the problem now, but certainly, I did. Oh, terrible.
0:40:01 > 0:40:03I mean, I met this stunning girl, and I didn't know
0:40:03 > 0:40:07where we got along, where to got to in our relationship.
0:40:07 > 0:40:10I met her afterwards and I more or less said to her,
0:40:10 > 0:40:12had to say to her, you know, "How far had we gone?"
0:40:12 > 0:40:16If you know what I mean, which is a pretty difficult place to be,
0:40:16 > 0:40:18because I just could not remember.
0:40:18 > 0:40:22But that's when it becomes alarming for the people around you.
0:40:22 > 0:40:25- Well, yes, yes. - My wife would come and sit with me
0:40:25 > 0:40:27and at first I denied that she was my wife,
0:40:27 > 0:40:30- because apparently I said my wife's French.- Oh, really?
0:40:30 > 0:40:32(Tricky.) I don't know why.
0:40:32 > 0:40:34He said to me, when he came round,
0:40:34 > 0:40:37"You probably should go cos my wife will be here soon."
0:40:37 > 0:40:41I said, "I'm your wife," and he went, "No, you're not. My wife's French."
0:40:41 > 0:40:44But she never said, "We have a happy loving relationship,"
0:40:44 > 0:40:48because she didn't want to plant... she never wanted years down the road
0:40:48 > 0:40:51to think, "He only thinks that because I planted that seed
0:40:51 > 0:40:52"in his head when he was vulnerable."
0:40:52 > 0:40:57The difficulty is that our memories can be biased,
0:40:57 > 0:41:03and we start to incorporate those other people's representations,
0:41:03 > 0:41:06into our own feelings of what is true.
0:41:12 > 0:41:14I think Mindy was very wise.
0:41:14 > 0:41:17She didn't push the point and I think it can be very disturbing
0:41:17 > 0:41:20for people whose memories are slowly returning
0:41:20 > 0:41:23to have questions and doubts put into their mind,
0:41:23 > 0:41:26because they're trying to deal with enough already.
0:41:26 > 0:41:27So she let me, and I did thankfully,
0:41:27 > 0:41:30fall in love with her again - which is good.
0:41:30 > 0:41:34'Feeling oneself stuck in an alternate reality
0:41:34 > 0:41:37'or being deeply confused are just some of the symptoms
0:41:37 > 0:41:39'of post traumatic amnesia.
0:41:39 > 0:41:42'Recovering from brain injury, patients might emerge with
0:41:42 > 0:41:45'incomprehensible memories, or inexplicable skills,
0:41:45 > 0:41:48'completely changed attitudes.
0:41:48 > 0:41:51'Stirling was briefly fluent in a language he can hardly speak.
0:41:51 > 0:41:56Well, he was lying asleep one night and he suddenly started to speak
0:41:56 > 0:42:01in French with an absolutely superb French accent.
0:42:01 > 0:42:03It isn't as though I'm bilingual, I'm not.
0:42:03 > 0:42:06I mean I can get away with French if my wife's there to help me.
0:42:06 > 0:42:09- It was apparently quite fluent? - Yes, apparently.
0:42:09 > 0:42:11I'm not sure it wasn't better than I could speak.
0:42:11 > 0:42:13My Birmingham accent returned,
0:42:13 > 0:42:15I haven't lived in Birmingham for over 35 years.
0:42:15 > 0:42:18- I left when I was a tiny child. - But you haven't got it now?
0:42:18 > 0:42:23- It did return briefly.- Did it?- Took about 30 seconds to get rid of it!
0:42:36 > 0:42:40The whole of brain injury recovery is a roller-coaster but normally
0:42:40 > 0:42:45by the time that the patient comes out into post traumatic amnesia,
0:42:45 > 0:42:47he seems to be relatively normal.
0:42:47 > 0:42:50So people will come flocking to see him, they'll be elated
0:42:50 > 0:42:54by the good news that suddenly he's better and he will be swamped.
0:42:57 > 0:43:00Everybody, all of his friends and family were coming to see him,
0:43:00 > 0:43:04he didn't feel that he'd had an accident, he couldn't remember
0:43:04 > 0:43:08the accident at that point, so he was thinking, "What's going on?"
0:43:08 > 0:43:10And it must have been like being in
0:43:10 > 0:43:13a bizarre sci-fi movie or something, you know.
0:43:13 > 0:43:15"I'm being kept here against my will,
0:43:15 > 0:43:17"everybody else is getting on with their lives,
0:43:17 > 0:43:20"Why don't I know where I am, or who I am, or what I am?"
0:43:20 > 0:43:23'Good morning Dr Artuzzio, I hope we're on time.'
0:43:23 > 0:43:26'Good morning. Yes, we have a few minutes yet.'
0:43:26 > 0:43:29'Dr Mazir, will you go ahead and prepare this patient?'
0:43:32 > 0:43:36What then happens is it's totally overwhelming
0:43:36 > 0:43:38and absolutely exhausting.
0:43:38 > 0:43:40They can't follow the conversation,
0:43:40 > 0:43:44we believe the frontal lobe has a almost filtering effect,
0:43:44 > 0:43:48so that it can cut out too many stimuli.
0:43:48 > 0:43:50If it has been damaged in the head injury,
0:43:50 > 0:43:52that filter doesn't seem to work.
0:43:52 > 0:43:55He'd had quite a few visitors one morning,
0:43:55 > 0:43:59and then I sort of left him for about 15 minutes,
0:43:59 > 0:44:03walked back into his room and he was on his hands and knees on the bed,
0:44:03 > 0:44:04elbows and knees rather,
0:44:04 > 0:44:07with his hands round the back of his head, going,
0:44:07 > 0:44:10"Argh, the pain! My head, my head!"
0:44:16 > 0:44:17They feel like they're going crazy.
0:44:17 > 0:44:21They feel like their brain is not working,
0:44:21 > 0:44:24and it just unfortunately further hinders their progress
0:44:24 > 0:44:27because they have this crisis of confidence.
0:44:28 > 0:44:31'The threatening clouds which have been there all the morning
0:44:31 > 0:44:34'turned this afternoon into rain,
0:44:34 > 0:44:37'rain which obviously is going to slow the practice times enormously,
0:44:37 > 0:44:40'as we see Graham Hill in the BRM...'
0:44:40 > 0:44:43I don't think that he really realised how bad he was.
0:44:43 > 0:44:46And it wasn't until he saw the first race,
0:44:46 > 0:44:51which I think was Monaco after that, on television,
0:44:51 > 0:44:56that he asked for a car and he wanted to go there.
0:44:56 > 0:44:59He was a little bit pathetic to start with, you know,
0:44:59 > 0:45:01"Oh, I want to go there. Can I go there?"
0:45:01 > 0:45:04"No, you're not capable of doing it." "Oh, I can, I can!"
0:45:04 > 0:45:06'But also of driver, a test...
0:45:06 > 0:45:08'There's Graham Hill coming into the fifth,
0:45:08 > 0:45:11'obviously something not quite right, or he may feel,
0:45:11 > 0:45:13'and justifiably so, that with these...'
0:45:13 > 0:45:16One of the difficulties during recovery from frontal lobe
0:45:16 > 0:45:20can be a lack of insight. Patients seem to almost have
0:45:20 > 0:45:24a physical centre somewhere within that part of the lobe that enables
0:45:24 > 0:45:28them to self-regulate and work out what they can and can't do.
0:45:28 > 0:45:30How long do you think this is going to take?
0:45:30 > 0:45:33There's talk of you being back to racing in no time at all.
0:45:33 > 0:45:36Well, the doctor's are better qualified to answer
0:45:36 > 0:45:39but I reckon it may take a month before I'm allowed to go off,
0:45:39 > 0:45:42you know, to get fit,
0:45:42 > 0:45:46and maybe a month getting fit and then straight in the car.
0:45:46 > 0:45:49Are you going to try and persuade him to stop racing after this?
0:45:49 > 0:45:51I shall ask him, yes.
0:45:51 > 0:45:56I haven't before, but this time I shall, definitely.
0:45:56 > 0:46:00What is so often difficult is a patient is desperate to get back
0:46:00 > 0:46:03and prove themselves well again and they can have
0:46:03 > 0:46:07totally unrealistic expectations as to what is possible.
0:46:07 > 0:46:10Stirling, your doctors have been quoted today as saying
0:46:10 > 0:46:13that you're still very weak. How do you feel yourself?
0:46:13 > 0:46:17Well, there are weaknesses, of course, down this left side.
0:46:17 > 0:46:20I mean, this arm is not as strong as this one, but I feel all right.
0:46:20 > 0:46:22I feel very well in fact.
0:46:22 > 0:46:25How soon do you think you'll be back on the track again?
0:46:25 > 0:46:27Well, that depends on the doctors quite honestly,
0:46:27 > 0:46:31but I think I'll be back in time for the British Grand Prix,
0:46:31 > 0:46:33which is the middle of July. About a month
0:46:33 > 0:46:37You reach a point where you think, "I'm fixed, I'm better,"
0:46:37 > 0:46:41and then a month goes by and you look back over the previous month
0:46:41 > 0:46:44and think, "Cor, I wasn't better then, was I? Now I am."
0:46:44 > 0:46:47Then another month goes by and you think,
0:46:47 > 0:46:48"Whoa, I was still a bit wonky."
0:46:48 > 0:46:51Yes, but I had the paralysis to help me, if you like.
0:46:51 > 0:46:53Because it was a physical manifestation?
0:46:53 > 0:46:57Yes, because it was there for, you know, for another six months.
0:46:57 > 0:47:01And so I think the fact that I obviously was not right,
0:47:01 > 0:47:04and I knew I wasn't right until I got rid of that problem.
0:47:04 > 0:47:07But the danger there is that was only one manifestation
0:47:07 > 0:47:09of the problems that you had.
0:47:09 > 0:47:14Did you immediately then think, "That's it, I'm fixed"?
0:47:14 > 0:47:16No.
0:47:16 > 0:47:18No, because I went and tried myself out with a car
0:47:18 > 0:47:22to see if I could race again, and the answer was no.
0:47:22 > 0:47:25And I'm the only person who can make that...
0:47:25 > 0:47:28The decision of having to say no to myself and think,
0:47:28 > 0:47:32"No, I'm not going to do it," caused an enormous change in my life.
0:47:33 > 0:47:36What made you decide finally to retire from racing?
0:47:36 > 0:47:40Well, I went out today to Goodwood, where I had the crash it so happens,
0:47:40 > 0:47:45with a racing sports car and did about 45 minutes of lapping.
0:47:45 > 0:47:49And while I was doing that I decided that I would be foolish to continue
0:47:49 > 0:47:52because I had lost certain things that I took for granted
0:47:52 > 0:47:54such as my dexterity, my concentration
0:47:54 > 0:47:59and you know, many things happened that normally I wouldn't even
0:47:59 > 0:48:02think about, and today I had to think about doing them.
0:48:03 > 0:48:07Do you remember that drive, when you decided?
0:48:07 > 0:48:13Yes. Yeah I do, because it was...
0:48:13 > 0:48:15very depressing.
0:48:15 > 0:48:18I tried not to show the depression but, you know,
0:48:18 > 0:48:21realising that this was the only decision I could make
0:48:21 > 0:48:23which was obvious to me because I had been...
0:48:23 > 0:48:26I knew if I went back to racing I'd either kill myself
0:48:26 > 0:48:30or kill somebody else so it was not a difficult decision to make,
0:48:30 > 0:48:34because it's something that had to be intuitive
0:48:34 > 0:48:36and it was no longer intuitive.
0:48:38 > 0:48:41'Now, although apparently fully recovered to normal health,
0:48:41 > 0:48:45'Stirling Moss has made the decision to race no more.'
0:48:49 > 0:48:51So in Stirling's case,
0:48:51 > 0:48:55he was about a year after his accident, wasn't he?
0:48:55 > 0:48:59- The paralysis had left him, he was physically OK.- Yep.
0:48:59 > 0:49:02Then he decided
0:49:02 > 0:49:05to go for a drive and to make his own assessment.
0:49:05 > 0:49:08How do you feel about him doing that? How do you feel about that?
0:49:08 > 0:49:09Well, as he says,
0:49:09 > 0:49:13he was very glad I wasn't in charge of them in those days,
0:49:13 > 0:49:16because I wouldn't have let him get in the car,
0:49:16 > 0:49:19and I wouldn't have let him get in the car for two years.
0:49:19 > 0:49:23And I wouldn't have let him get in the car until I serially assessed
0:49:23 > 0:49:27his psychomotor skills, over a period of time.
0:49:27 > 0:49:31He says, "I couldn't wait that long."
0:49:31 > 0:49:34It was far too soon to make a decision like that.
0:49:34 > 0:49:39I'm not saying that he would have been able to go back
0:49:39 > 0:49:44and be competitive for a few years, actually,
0:49:44 > 0:49:48but, even so, it was far too early to make that decision.
0:49:48 > 0:49:52I mean, I know when I got out of racing I didn't want to leave,
0:49:52 > 0:49:55but I left because it was the only intelligent thing for me to do.
0:49:55 > 0:49:59Because if you couldn't win, you didn't want to be there?
0:49:59 > 0:50:02If I wasn't in there to win... Yeah, exactly. And...
0:50:02 > 0:50:06I'm not a good loser, I don't want to go out there and make up the field
0:50:06 > 0:50:10and therefore it wasn't that difficult, but it was hard.
0:50:10 > 0:50:15- Trying to meet you in that period after, say a year afterwards.- Yeah.
0:50:15 > 0:50:17Does this resonate at all with you?
0:50:17 > 0:50:20I went through a long phase of wanting to wear a T-shirt,
0:50:20 > 0:50:25on the front of which said, "I'm absolutely fine, thanks for asking."
0:50:25 > 0:50:30And on the back said, "I'm still poorly you know." Because sometimes,
0:50:30 > 0:50:33with recovering from brain injury people will just,
0:50:33 > 0:50:36"Wow, he's walking about and moving and everything! He's fine."
0:50:36 > 0:50:40As they would with you because by then, you're physically fixed,
0:50:40 > 0:50:42still the same robust soul as you were when you hit the bank.
0:50:42 > 0:50:45Your T-shirt, the equivalent of mine, would say on the front,
0:50:45 > 0:50:49"I'm absolutely fine, thank you - and lucky," on the back...
0:50:49 > 0:50:54I think I'd have had on my back I'd think that I had lost, you see.
0:50:54 > 0:50:57I'd reckon I wasn't doing what I wanted to do,
0:50:57 > 0:51:00therefore my life is not at the moment complete.
0:51:00 > 0:51:04You know, that was it, that was the end of it.
0:51:04 > 0:51:08- But what had changed? Was it your ability to control your arms?- No.
0:51:08 > 0:51:13No what had changed was what I used to do was automatic,
0:51:13 > 0:51:15now it was a conscience thought.
0:51:15 > 0:51:16Everything had to be thought out.
0:51:16 > 0:51:19It was no longer what my life was.
0:51:19 > 0:51:24No longer could I write a piece of prose that was really worth reading,
0:51:24 > 0:51:28you know what I mean, and so therefore I had changed.
0:51:28 > 0:51:31I mean, my life had been changed and I, obviously, along with it.
0:51:34 > 0:51:37'The pathways in his brain,
0:51:37 > 0:51:41'developed and honed by years of top flight racing,
0:51:41 > 0:51:45'had not fully recovered from the accident.
0:51:45 > 0:51:49'for Stirling what was once second nature behind the wheel,
0:51:49 > 0:51:54'was now a conscious, tiring and slower effort.'
0:51:59 > 0:52:01These days what we try to do is,
0:52:01 > 0:52:04we try to ensure that people only have positive experiences,
0:52:04 > 0:52:09because the risk of a set back is so overwhelming in head injury
0:52:09 > 0:52:11because it seems to affect their very entity.
0:52:13 > 0:52:17You see when can you go back?
0:52:17 > 0:52:19And he couldn't have been an also ran.
0:52:19 > 0:52:23And he wouldn't have wanted to tarnish his image, ever.
0:52:23 > 0:52:27'Stirling led across the line to win his first Grand Prix and
0:52:27 > 0:52:32'to go down in history as the first British driver to win this event.'
0:52:36 > 0:52:40And I'm going from being one of the most successful drivers,
0:52:40 > 0:52:41at the top of my form,
0:52:41 > 0:52:45and now suddenly all that I had worked for was taken away.
0:52:45 > 0:52:49And I had to then start building up another life,
0:52:49 > 0:52:50which was away from that.
0:52:50 > 0:52:53Forget that, I can't, I mustn't look at that any more.
0:52:53 > 0:52:56I've got to build an entirely new life. I had nothing.
0:52:56 > 0:52:59The only thing I had was my name.
0:53:00 > 0:53:03'The new two litre Renault 20,
0:53:03 > 0:53:06'is equipped with centralised door locking,
0:53:06 > 0:53:09'adjustable head lights, electric windows,
0:53:09 > 0:53:15'in fact more luxury features as standard than any car in its class.
0:53:15 > 0:53:19'Oh, and of course, a powerful new two litre engine.'
0:53:19 > 0:53:20ENGINE REVS
0:53:20 > 0:53:23'Who do you think you are, Stirling Moss?'
0:53:26 > 0:53:28'His name still sells today
0:53:28 > 0:53:31'even though he never made a successful comeback.
0:53:31 > 0:53:35'But a little of the old racing Moss can perhaps be glimpsed
0:53:35 > 0:53:38'at vintage car rallies which he loves.'
0:53:38 > 0:53:42So this DVD is from 92
0:53:42 > 0:53:45and this is you in a rerun of the Mille Miglia.
0:53:45 > 0:53:50- Right, so this is behind the wheel, 43 years later.- Yeah.
0:53:53 > 0:53:56- 'What the- BLEEP?- Why didn't you tell me then, you prat?'
0:53:56 > 0:53:58- Language! - STIRLING CHUCKLES
0:53:58 > 0:54:00'BLEEP. BLEEP. BLEEP.'
0:54:00 > 0:54:03- STIRLING CHUCKLES - Straight in, no mercy!- Terrible!
0:54:03 > 0:54:06'Put it on your head and then put it on.'
0:54:06 > 0:54:07You're back in business here.
0:54:07 > 0:54:10You're driving the same route, the same car,
0:54:10 > 0:54:13shouting at your co-driver, who is THAT Stirling Moss?
0:54:13 > 0:54:18You know, that's the modern one because, you know, it isn't a race.
0:54:18 > 0:54:22If it had been a race then obviously I would be very upset,
0:54:22 > 0:54:24in this one I was a bit frustrated.
0:54:24 > 0:54:26'320. Three kilometres, 20.'
0:54:26 > 0:54:29- 'No not the kilometres the- BLEEP- minutes you- BLEEP- !'
0:54:29 > 0:54:30THEY LAUGH
0:54:33 > 0:54:35It is two men arguing in a car.
0:54:35 > 0:54:39So there you are, doing what you do.
0:54:39 > 0:54:44I know it's not in a race situation, but seriously,
0:54:44 > 0:54:46try and tell me, rummage about in there,
0:54:46 > 0:54:49there will be some emotions going on cos I know even you feel emotions.
0:54:49 > 0:54:52What were you feeling behind the wheel of that car again
0:54:52 > 0:54:54- and doing things like that? - Frustrated.
0:54:54 > 0:54:59I mean, the Mille Miglia now, of course, is not like it was at all.
0:54:59 > 0:55:00It's not a speed event.
0:55:00 > 0:55:06But, to go and make mistakes, as we were doing, was very frustrating
0:55:06 > 0:55:11quite frankly, and I can't contain myself that well,
0:55:11 > 0:55:15I am someone who says what I think, which I shouldn't quite often
0:55:15 > 0:55:17and so I'm a bit embarrassed at that actually.
0:55:17 > 0:55:21I think the world will forgive you for saying what you think, Stirling.
0:55:21 > 0:55:24Then you cross the line and you pretty much nail it on time.
0:55:24 > 0:55:29- You're absolutely bang on. How did that feel?- Luck.
0:55:29 > 0:55:33We were ill-prepared and we were very lucky, it was as simple as that.
0:55:33 > 0:55:36Lucky is such an interesting word in this context
0:55:36 > 0:55:40because I will guarantee you've been told how lucky you are to be here
0:55:40 > 0:55:42many, many, many, many times. But lucky?
0:55:42 > 0:55:45The world's greatest racing driver can't race anymore?
0:55:45 > 0:55:49- That's not luck. That's bad luck, isn't it?- Yeah, I'm told I'm lucky.
0:55:49 > 0:55:52I'd be a hell of a lot luckier if the tyre hadn't blown at 300mph.
0:55:52 > 0:55:54- Yes, quite! - That's unlucky if you ask me!
0:55:54 > 0:55:58Do you think you got over yours completely?
0:55:58 > 0:56:01I always think that and then a year goes by and you look back
0:56:01 > 0:56:03and think, "Oh, you know what? I hadn't."
0:56:03 > 0:56:06I met somebody yesterday who I haven't seen for a year,
0:56:06 > 0:56:10who said straight away, "Big difference!"
0:56:10 > 0:56:14- Oh, really?- Yeah. I think it's a very, very long road because of,
0:56:14 > 0:56:16because we're not hard-wired are we?
0:56:16 > 0:56:19There's not a load of wires and flashing lights in there,
0:56:19 > 0:56:23it's a hideously complicated beast in there
0:56:23 > 0:56:26made up of experiences and tendencies and inclinations
0:56:26 > 0:56:29and it takes a long time to build it
0:56:29 > 0:56:32and if you mess it up as heavily and as strongly as we did,
0:56:32 > 0:56:34and as a lot of people do,
0:56:34 > 0:56:37then I think it takes a commensurately long time to
0:56:37 > 0:56:40- settle back down and reboot itself. - Yes.- I find it a bit frightening.
0:56:40 > 0:56:44Yes, it's frightening because it's something we can't control.
0:56:44 > 0:56:45We can't control our brain.
0:56:45 > 0:56:48Our brain controls us, doesn't it?
0:56:50 > 0:56:53'I said at the start of this programme that much of what
0:56:53 > 0:56:58'we know about the brain was learned from observing what happens
0:56:58 > 0:57:00'when someone damages it.
0:57:00 > 0:57:02'But it's not just medical science that learns.
0:57:02 > 0:57:05'Stirling and I have learned a lot about our own brains
0:57:05 > 0:57:08'as a result of damaging them.
0:57:08 > 0:57:12'OK, so Stirling felt he couldn't react as quickly behind the wheel
0:57:12 > 0:57:16'and he gave up racing. But it hasn't stopped him continuing to be
0:57:16 > 0:57:21'a much-loved, respected and admired character in the racing world
0:57:21 > 0:57:23'about which he's still so passionate.'
0:57:25 > 0:57:30'Welcome to the Inaugural Motor Sport Hall of Fame.'
0:57:30 > 0:57:33- Is this where we're meant to be? - That's right, sir.
0:57:33 > 0:57:36- Oh, good, what time shall we be here? - You're absolutely on time, sir.
0:57:36 > 0:57:41Sir Jackie Stewart and Sir Stirling Moss.
0:57:45 > 0:57:49Nevertheless, you see the difference is we're diametrically opposed,
0:57:49 > 0:57:52because I think racing should be dangerous,
0:57:52 > 0:57:55because I think to me, that was what it was about.
0:57:55 > 0:57:58Here's the thing, Stirling is 80 now.
0:57:58 > 0:58:03He's just spent three, four hours in a studio with me
0:58:03 > 0:58:08talking pretty intensely, and now he's up there, doing that.
0:58:08 > 0:58:14His brain's still absorbing so much,
0:58:14 > 0:58:18and then putting out the required output.
0:58:19 > 0:58:22I think he got better.
0:58:22 > 0:58:24'Ladies and Gentlemen, Sir Stirling Moss.'
0:58:24 > 0:58:27APPLAUSE
0:58:42 > 0:58:46Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:58:46 > 0:58:49E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk