0:00:02 > 0:00:04This programme contains strong language
0:00:04 > 0:00:07Bangkok Airport is like no other airport on earth.
0:00:07 > 0:00:09- Welcome to Thailand! - This is my best smiling.
0:00:09 > 0:00:13- It's where east meets west... - Ching-ching-ching, ching-ching-ching.
0:00:13 > 0:00:15..Buddhist meets backpacker...
0:00:15 > 0:00:18- That way to the beach. - ..and traveller meets trouble.
0:00:18 > 0:00:21- You'll never see me in Thailand ever again.- No, no!- Yes.
0:00:21 > 0:00:23And if the culture seems strange...
0:00:23 > 0:00:24Free hugs?
0:00:24 > 0:00:27- ..the language seems foreign... - SHE SPEAKS THAI
0:00:27 > 0:00:31- ..and you're 6,000 miles from home...- I'm stuck in Bangkok!
0:00:31 > 0:00:34..don't panic - there's an army of airport staff just waiting
0:00:34 > 0:00:36to help you out.
0:00:36 > 0:00:39- One way... - How may I help you?
0:00:39 > 0:00:40Argh! THEY LAUGH
0:00:40 > 0:00:41..or another.
0:00:41 > 0:00:43Get in the line.
0:00:43 > 0:00:44So whether it's your gateway to
0:00:44 > 0:00:46a million once-in-a-lifetime experiences...
0:00:46 > 0:00:49It's all about love. Love, love and love.
0:00:49 > 0:00:52..or just a ticket to a good old-fashioned holiday nightmare...
0:00:52 > 0:00:53Look at all the cancelled flights!
0:00:53 > 0:00:55..THIS is your final call.
0:00:57 > 0:00:59Very happy, everyone.
0:00:59 > 0:01:02- Welcome...- Passport, please.- ..to Bangkok Airport.
0:01:08 > 0:01:11It's the eve of the annual Airport Awards,
0:01:11 > 0:01:14and the staff are being extra specially nice.
0:01:14 > 0:01:18When I help others I feel so happy, I feel good.
0:01:18 > 0:01:21Everyone wants to win the coveted award for customer service.
0:01:21 > 0:01:23When someone has a problem,
0:01:23 > 0:01:26they came come here and we can give them a happy ending.
0:01:26 > 0:01:29But not everyone's impressed by the customer care they're getting.
0:01:29 > 0:01:31That doesn't work for me at all.
0:01:31 > 0:01:34Cosmos and Harry can't get a flight back to London...
0:01:34 > 0:01:38This woman is so useless, you know that? Absolutely useless.
0:01:38 > 0:01:41..and Will's left high and dry after a night on the town.
0:01:41 > 0:01:44Is there another flight at any stage today?
0:01:44 > 0:01:46But he's only got himself to blame.
0:01:46 > 0:01:50Don't get drunk in Thailand, that's the key message.
0:01:50 > 0:01:51The medical team rally round
0:01:51 > 0:01:54when a British backpacker puts his foot in it.
0:01:54 > 0:01:56- This is it. - LAUGHING:- It is quite gruesome.
0:01:56 > 0:01:59And we meet the airport doctor who's so popular
0:01:59 > 0:02:01he's got his very own fan club.
0:02:01 > 0:02:02I love him.
0:02:04 > 0:02:08But first, a man who loves to ask...
0:02:08 > 0:02:11I love...European tourists.
0:02:12 > 0:02:14Bay from VAT refunds has become
0:02:14 > 0:02:16a legend in the world of customer service.
0:02:16 > 0:02:18Good morning, sir.
0:02:18 > 0:02:20Everybody in airport know me.
0:02:22 > 0:02:247, 8, 900.
0:02:24 > 0:02:28I can meet everybody, talk to them,
0:02:28 > 0:02:34when they come to me I feel very happy to take care of them.
0:02:34 > 0:02:36Bay likes to make every tourist feel at home.
0:02:36 > 0:02:39I like to learn English language.
0:02:39 > 0:02:41Passport, please!
0:02:41 > 0:02:42Thank you.
0:02:42 > 0:02:45English people, they are very lovely.
0:02:45 > 0:02:47HE LAUGHS
0:02:47 > 0:02:52English, Japanese, Chinese... oh, and Thai!
0:02:56 > 0:02:59And if you try a bit of Thai, it makes Bay's day.
0:02:59 > 0:03:04When you come to Thailand you can say Thai words.
0:03:04 > 0:03:07For example, hello with Thai people...
0:03:09 > 0:03:10You can do like this.
0:03:12 > 0:03:17And when you would like to thank them, you can use Thai word...
0:03:21 > 0:03:22Like this.
0:03:22 > 0:03:24And you can smile with them.
0:03:24 > 0:03:27Because Bay knows that nothing speaks louder than a smile.
0:03:27 > 0:03:29One, two, three.
0:03:31 > 0:03:33HE SUPPRESSES LAUGHTER
0:03:44 > 0:03:49Customer satisfaction is top priority for the Tourist Police too.
0:03:49 > 0:03:50They may be armed,
0:03:50 > 0:03:54but don't worry, they'd much rather help you out than shoot you down.
0:03:54 > 0:03:57And there are more than enough tourists in trouble to keep
0:03:57 > 0:03:59Teay and her team on their toes.
0:03:59 > 0:04:03Thailand is just like a normal country.
0:04:03 > 0:04:07The young people, they don't have experience about travelling
0:04:07 > 0:04:09to another country on his own.
0:04:09 > 0:04:13Today Teay's customer service skills are being tested by
0:04:13 > 0:04:16British backpackers Cosmos and Harry.
0:04:16 > 0:04:19Hey, look, this is our ticket here. We need to go home.
0:04:19 > 0:04:21They're ending their holiday a week early,
0:04:21 > 0:04:24after they were robbed on the holiday island of Ko Samui.
0:04:25 > 0:04:28Money got stolen out our bag.
0:04:28 > 0:04:32And then the Tourist Police in Ko Samui sent us back to Bangkok,
0:04:32 > 0:04:34then we spoke to the embassy.
0:04:34 > 0:04:36They practically said they can't help.
0:04:37 > 0:04:40And they said to come to the airline and ask the airline
0:04:40 > 0:04:42to send us home early.
0:04:42 > 0:04:46But Cosmos isn't happy with the flight his airline is offering him.
0:04:46 > 0:04:49I can't fly on the 25th, that's impossible. That is impossible.
0:04:49 > 0:04:51That doesn't work for me at all.
0:04:52 > 0:04:56On the 25th, well, what's the date today, the 21st? I told you.
0:04:56 > 0:04:59What, are we supposed to sit in the airport until the 25th?
0:04:59 > 0:05:03This woman is so useless, you know that? Absolutely useless.
0:05:07 > 0:05:11That's too late. Hang up on this woman, cos she's doing my nut.
0:05:13 > 0:05:16While Harry holds for the airline, Cosmos has a brainwave.
0:05:16 > 0:05:20- Excuse me.- Yes?- Can you check if there's any flights
0:05:20 > 0:05:23leaving with any other airlines today, for me?
0:05:23 > 0:05:26They're not really travel agents, but Teay's colleague Chayakorn
0:05:26 > 0:05:30seems as keen as the boys to get them on the first plane home.
0:05:30 > 0:05:33Even so, Cosmos isn't impressed.
0:05:35 > 0:05:38Make out they're helping you, they're not really doing anything.
0:05:38 > 0:05:40Just sitting there.
0:05:40 > 0:05:44But he's spoken too soon. Chayakorn has found him a flight.
0:05:44 > 0:05:50- 27,000 baht each?- Yes.- To leave... - Is that for both of us? Two or one?
0:05:50 > 0:05:52- One.- Is that direct?- Yup.
0:05:52 > 0:05:55- One way, there?- And that leaves tonight?- Yup.- 12.15?- Mm-hmm.
0:05:55 > 0:05:57And when do we have to book that?
0:05:57 > 0:05:59Cos I'll go and arrange for more money.
0:05:59 > 0:06:03You have to book, you have to go up to the Thai Airways office.
0:06:03 > 0:06:06No, listen, listen...
0:06:06 > 0:06:09As Cosmos leaves to raise cash for the flight Chayakorn's found...
0:06:09 > 0:06:10For both of us.
0:06:10 > 0:06:14..Harry finally gets an offer of a flight from their original airline -
0:06:14 > 0:06:16for half the price.
0:06:17 > 0:06:20Erm, can I pay you cash, how do you want me to pay?
0:06:20 > 0:06:24Card? Basically, we still have to pay, like, £400.
0:06:26 > 0:06:28But at least we get home.
0:06:28 > 0:06:31But they've only got an hour to confirm the flight,
0:06:31 > 0:06:32and Cosmos has disappeared.
0:06:34 > 0:06:37Doughnut. He's a doughnut.
0:06:37 > 0:06:40I told him to stay.
0:06:40 > 0:06:42Harry's got to find his mate, and fast.
0:06:52 > 0:06:54Everyone in Bangkok Airport has a nickname.
0:06:54 > 0:06:56It's usually given to them at birth, but it helps make them
0:06:56 > 0:06:59more approachable when you're lost and confused.
0:06:59 > 0:07:04In Thailand, the nicknames...big thing for us.
0:07:04 > 0:07:09And first name after nicknames in Thailand.
0:07:09 > 0:07:11Teay's real name is...
0:07:11 > 0:07:15While Bay's real name is... Well, quite long as well.
0:07:15 > 0:07:17All right, my name is...
0:07:19 > 0:07:22But it's down at the airport's medical centre where you get
0:07:22 > 0:07:24the best names, like Nurse Geng.
0:07:24 > 0:07:26His name's not Geng at all.
0:07:26 > 0:07:28My name is Pornsak.
0:07:28 > 0:07:29COLLEAGUES LAUGH
0:07:29 > 0:07:35My nickname Geng means "strong man" or "smart man."
0:07:37 > 0:07:41- Why you laugh?- Really? Really?!
0:07:41 > 0:07:43My nickname is...
0:07:43 > 0:07:46- I think this means bee. - Honey bees. Bzz!
0:07:46 > 0:07:48Bees, yeah.
0:07:48 > 0:07:51There's a Dr Geng too, and a Nurse Oo.
0:07:51 > 0:07:54Oo is mean...cock.
0:07:57 > 0:07:58INDISTINCT
0:08:02 > 0:08:06Chicken. Chicken!
0:08:06 > 0:08:07But the man with the coolest nickname...
0:08:07 > 0:08:10- Sawadee ka.- ..is Patpong Chainikom.
0:08:10 > 0:08:12My nickname is Art, A-R-T.
0:08:12 > 0:08:15My mum call me that since I was born, I don't know why.
0:08:15 > 0:08:19Actually, I'm not into art, or anything.
0:08:19 > 0:08:21Dr Art has been at the airport three years now,
0:08:21 > 0:08:24and has got his own approach to customer service.
0:08:24 > 0:08:29I believe in karma more. If you do good, you get good.
0:08:29 > 0:08:33If you do bad, somebody will give you the bad things.
0:08:33 > 0:08:34OK, is all done.
0:08:34 > 0:08:36So try to be nice!
0:08:38 > 0:08:41Dr Art's next patient is Tobias, from London.
0:08:41 > 0:08:44His foot needs fixing before he catches his plane home.
0:08:45 > 0:08:47I've got a wound which needs redressing,
0:08:47 > 0:08:50and has just been cleaned out and stuff.
0:08:50 > 0:08:55- OK.- Can you guys do that here?- Yes. May I have your passport?
0:08:56 > 0:09:00Tobias was looking forward to five weeks island hopping with his
0:09:00 > 0:09:05mate James, then disaster struck, and he's been hopping ever since.
0:09:05 > 0:09:07I got this about four weeks ago.
0:09:07 > 0:09:09I'd been four nights, three nights, I think.
0:09:09 > 0:09:14And I had a small wound in my foot which a load of bacteria
0:09:14 > 0:09:17sort of jumped into, so I went to a clinic.
0:09:17 > 0:09:20They looked at it and said, "We're going to put you under
0:09:20 > 0:09:24"and operate", and two hours later I'm waking up in a ward...
0:09:24 > 0:09:27LAUGHING: ..with a huge hole in my foot.
0:09:27 > 0:09:30Round here it's still a pretty open wound.
0:09:30 > 0:09:33We just need to make sure it's cleaned and not infected again.
0:09:33 > 0:09:35Show me your medical report.
0:09:35 > 0:09:36Really good.
0:09:36 > 0:09:39Tobias' foot is on the mend, but you should have seen it back in the day.
0:09:39 > 0:09:42Nervous viewers, look away now.
0:09:42 > 0:09:46This is it from about two days later.
0:09:46 > 0:09:49This is it from a sort of side-on view.
0:09:49 > 0:09:52That's just the skin, pretty much hanging off!
0:09:52 > 0:09:54Tobias' wound was pretty horrific,
0:09:54 > 0:09:56but his mate James managed to see the funny side.
0:09:56 > 0:09:57I went to the doctor,
0:09:57 > 0:10:00"If you amputate it, here's the address, send it home to me",
0:10:00 > 0:10:03a little joke, trying to get him worried, but he was on morphine.
0:10:03 > 0:10:07It was gory, but I don't get squeamish or anything like that.
0:10:07 > 0:10:12This is me and the team of doctors and nurses.
0:10:12 > 0:10:15My foot is still wide open down there.
0:10:15 > 0:10:18But, yeah, they were all so friendly and brilliant.
0:10:18 > 0:10:23- It is quite gruesome.- Everyone's been enjoying Tobias' wound.
0:10:23 > 0:10:25And now it's Dr Art's turn.
0:10:25 > 0:10:27- So let's go to see the wound.- OK.
0:10:30 > 0:10:32So today we're going to clean the wound for you.
0:10:32 > 0:10:35The wound is looking quite good right now, I think it is
0:10:35 > 0:10:39almost healed, but it needs about two more weeks.
0:10:39 > 0:10:42If it doesn't heal, you may need a skin graft.
0:10:42 > 0:10:47So you need to see your doctor that you go to, go home.
0:10:47 > 0:10:50- Thank you very much. - It's a routine case,
0:10:50 > 0:10:54but Dr Art knows that small acts of kindness bring their own reward.
0:10:54 > 0:10:59Sometimes we have a lot of stories to learn about life,
0:10:59 > 0:11:03people's life, we don't have to go out of the country or anything,
0:11:03 > 0:11:04but we can learn from them.
0:11:04 > 0:11:08For Tobias and James, it's been a learning experience too.
0:11:09 > 0:11:11I was really impressed by the service,
0:11:11 > 0:11:14the hospital treatment they get out here.
0:11:14 > 0:11:15Everything's worked out quite well.
0:11:15 > 0:11:22We've had very bad luck, but at the same time, had good luck.
0:11:24 > 0:11:26Tobias is pronounced fit to fly.
0:11:26 > 0:11:29Thank you very much for all of this, brilliant.
0:11:29 > 0:11:32He can leave Thailand with a smile, an insurance claim
0:11:32 > 0:11:34and a great set of selfies.
0:11:41 > 0:11:44The medical centre may fancy its chances in the Airport Awards,
0:11:44 > 0:11:48but they face tough competition from an unlikely quarter.
0:11:48 > 0:11:50The department? Lost property? The man?
0:11:58 > 0:12:00HEROIC MUSIC
0:12:00 > 0:12:04Supakitti's famous for his love of superheroes.
0:12:04 > 0:12:06Superhero, Batman, or Superman, Clark Kent.
0:12:06 > 0:12:09He's become a hero in his own right
0:12:09 > 0:12:11thanks to his superpowers of deduction.
0:12:11 > 0:12:14When luggage goes missing, he can usually pull it out of the bag.
0:12:14 > 0:12:20People usually push iPad on their trolley, and they forgot it.
0:12:20 > 0:12:24Maybe animal, the cat, the dog, or the big Sony Bravia.
0:12:24 > 0:12:25HE LAUGHS
0:12:25 > 0:12:27It's very, very different.
0:12:27 > 0:12:31Checked if the baggage tag is on the...you know?
0:12:31 > 0:12:32Today he's helping Mark.
0:12:32 > 0:12:35He think he's left his bag in visa on arrival,
0:12:35 > 0:12:40and to make matters worse, he's left his wife in baggage reclaim.
0:12:40 > 0:12:42My wife will be waiting at the luggage belt,
0:12:42 > 0:12:46she does not know because she is not with me now.
0:12:46 > 0:12:48IN ENGLISH:
0:12:48 > 0:12:50Luggage, yeah.
0:12:50 > 0:12:51Right now, yeah.
0:12:53 > 0:12:57I put my bag down when I had visa on arrival, and I signed
0:12:57 > 0:13:01and got the visa and walked through, but I left the bag behind.
0:13:01 > 0:13:05So that's why they sent me up to the lost property counter,
0:13:05 > 0:13:06to relocate where it is.
0:13:06 > 0:13:08I exactly know where it is, but it's just
0:13:08 > 0:13:10because of the border protection I can't go there.
0:13:10 > 0:13:13Supakitti's mission is to reunite Mark with his luggage -
0:13:13 > 0:13:14and his wife.
0:13:15 > 0:13:19We call to the staff, to the passengers, to the
0:13:19 > 0:13:21friends of the passengers.
0:13:21 > 0:13:22We try everything, like detectives.
0:13:24 > 0:13:28Using who-knows-what powers, Supakitti's on to something.
0:13:29 > 0:13:34I think we've found his bag, eh? From visa on arrival.
0:13:34 > 0:13:37They pass back through security and into the baggage hall.
0:13:37 > 0:13:40Supakitti goes after the bag, leaving Mark to track down his wife.
0:13:44 > 0:13:46I'm not sure why she's taking so long,
0:13:46 > 0:13:50cos we set off at the same time, and I had the time to go up
0:13:50 > 0:13:52and make the complaint and come back.
0:13:52 > 0:13:53Unless she's waiting for me,
0:13:53 > 0:13:56cos it looks like a lot of crowd there at immigration.
0:13:58 > 0:14:00WOMAN MAKES ANNOUNCEMENT OVER PA SYSTEM
0:14:02 > 0:14:08- Air France, better check it.- You are a legend. Thank you, mate.- Yeah, OK.
0:14:08 > 0:14:10You are so lucky, eh?
0:14:10 > 0:14:13Supakitti doesn't want thanks, he's just doing his job.
0:14:13 > 0:14:17'I love it, I enjoy helping the passengers.'
0:14:17 > 0:14:19I think it's...
0:14:19 > 0:14:20It's everyday life for me.
0:14:22 > 0:14:25Thank you, Supakitti, you really are a super kid.
0:14:25 > 0:14:26To make things even better,
0:14:26 > 0:14:29Mark spots his wife in the immigration queue.
0:14:29 > 0:14:35- That's my wife.- But she doesn't seem too happy to see him.
0:14:35 > 0:14:37- Give me a hug. - No, no, what happened?
0:14:37 > 0:14:40When I clicked the photograph, I put the bag down...
0:14:40 > 0:14:43- Yeah?- ..and I walked out. OK?
0:14:43 > 0:14:47So I could not come back in because...you know,
0:14:47 > 0:14:49I'd crossed the thing.
0:14:49 > 0:14:51So I had to go out, I went to lost and found,
0:14:51 > 0:14:54they were very helpful, they made sure to get my bag back,
0:14:54 > 0:14:57which they did, and reunite me with my beautiful wife.
0:14:57 > 0:14:59- So here you are. - Oh, Mark, you charmer.
0:14:59 > 0:15:01- You're an idiot.- Yeah.
0:15:01 > 0:15:05So, bags and family are reunited. It's another happy ending.
0:15:17 > 0:15:20The annual Airport Awards are fast approaching,
0:15:20 > 0:15:22and the race is on for the most prestigious award of all.
0:15:23 > 0:15:29Service. Excellent service...for tourists.
0:15:29 > 0:15:31But Bay won't have things all his own way.
0:15:31 > 0:15:33Sawadee ka.
0:15:33 > 0:15:36Information officer Jibbydoo has her eye on the prize.
0:15:36 > 0:15:42When I help others I feel so happy, I feel good, but sometimes...
0:15:42 > 0:15:45I'm not an angel or anything like that,
0:15:45 > 0:15:49so grumpy people come to me, when grumpy passengers come to me,
0:15:49 > 0:15:53sometimes I not have that much patience to...
0:15:55 > 0:15:59But I will try my best, I always try my best anyway.
0:15:59 > 0:16:01Customer service may be hitting new heights...
0:16:01 > 0:16:02HE WHISTLES
0:16:02 > 0:16:05..but after a hard morning testing the patience
0:16:05 > 0:16:08of the Tourist Police, Harry's still looking for his mate Cosmos.
0:16:08 > 0:16:10He's been offered a cheap flight home,
0:16:10 > 0:16:14but he'll lose it unless he finds his pal in the next few minutes,
0:16:14 > 0:16:17so he's using their special mating call.
0:16:17 > 0:16:19That's our whistle. HE LAUGHS
0:16:19 > 0:16:21When we can't find someone,
0:16:21 > 0:16:24we just do this whistle and they'll come and find us.
0:16:24 > 0:16:28But maybe not in the airport, maybe somewhere smaller.
0:16:28 > 0:16:30HE CONTINUES WHISTLING
0:16:31 > 0:16:34Maybe in the toilet. Wait one minute.
0:16:34 > 0:16:35HE WHISTLES
0:16:38 > 0:16:41Wait a minute, Bangkok Airport's one of the largest terminals
0:16:41 > 0:16:44in the world, it's the size of 80 football pitches,
0:16:44 > 0:16:46so this isn't going to work.
0:16:46 > 0:16:48HE CONTINUES WHISTLING
0:16:48 > 0:16:49ANSWERING WHISTLE IN DISTANCE
0:16:49 > 0:16:52- Yeah, there he is. - Oh, hang on, it has.
0:16:54 > 0:16:57See, the whistle helped, I told you.
0:16:57 > 0:17:01- They said we've got a flight tomorrow, yeah?- How much?
0:17:01 > 0:17:021,300 for both of us.
0:17:02 > 0:17:06- Yeah, but...- Let's pay for it now. Ha-ha, we're going home!
0:17:06 > 0:17:09I think we have to withdraw and give her the cash.
0:17:09 > 0:17:10- To who?- To these people.
0:17:10 > 0:17:13Back at Tourist Police HQ, Cosmos tries to charm
0:17:13 > 0:17:15Teay into helping them buy the tickets.
0:17:16 > 0:17:22- Useless.- I think...cash. - Yeah, where's the lady gone?
0:17:22 > 0:17:24- She went to the toilet. - Here we go, another drama.
0:17:24 > 0:17:28This one's not on our job at all. Useless.
0:17:28 > 0:17:30They're not exactly hitting it off,
0:17:30 > 0:17:33but Teay offers to take the boys to the airline desk.
0:17:33 > 0:17:36It dawns on Cosmos that Harry hasn't given him
0:17:36 > 0:17:39any details for the flight he's about to buy.
0:17:39 > 0:17:42Listen, listen, listen, I'm not feeling this vibe.
0:17:42 > 0:17:45- No, you stop talking, hold on. - You're saying you want to...
0:17:45 > 0:17:47Stop talking, bruv, cos you don't even have any money!
0:17:47 > 0:17:50Can you explain to me what's happening?
0:17:50 > 0:17:53Cos first of all, I'm paying for it, so before we book anything,
0:17:53 > 0:17:55I want to know what's happening.
0:17:57 > 0:17:58Yeah, but I don't want to transfer my money.
0:17:58 > 0:18:01What time's the flight tomorrow and where does it go?
0:18:01 > 0:18:04- Eight in the morning.- And then to where?- Bruv, it gets us out of here.
0:18:04 > 0:18:06There's no details,
0:18:06 > 0:18:08I want details before you start doing all this crazy shit.
0:18:08 > 0:18:11- Bruv, it gets us out of here. - Have you got details?
0:18:11 > 0:18:15The money's not the problem, I just want to know the details.
0:18:15 > 0:18:17Cos he's jumping around crazy.
0:18:17 > 0:18:20I need to know exactly what's happening. You know what I mean?
0:18:20 > 0:18:23I'm paying for the flight, I'm not going to pay for something
0:18:23 > 0:18:25that don't make sense. Understand me?
0:18:26 > 0:18:32Where are we going? Do you even know where we're going? I do, it's sick.
0:18:37 > 0:18:40- Yes, Visa. - Which do you trust more? Ugh!
0:18:40 > 0:18:4626... No, no, 26,000, you absolute twat. 26,000.
0:18:49 > 0:18:52It's a load of money, but it don't mean nothing.
0:18:52 > 0:18:56While the boys argue, the money is deposited in the airline's account.
0:18:57 > 0:19:00- How much did we spend? - We're nearly there, nearly there.
0:19:00 > 0:19:02And Cosmos still hasn't a clue what he's bought.
0:19:02 > 0:19:04Mate, I don't even know our flight details.
0:19:04 > 0:19:07We've just booked a flight and I don't have a clue where we're going.
0:19:07 > 0:19:10Back at Tourist Police HQ, Chayakorn fills Cosmos in on
0:19:10 > 0:19:13the ticket Harry's talked him into buying,
0:19:13 > 0:19:16and he finds out there's a little stopover in Guangzhou, China.
0:19:16 > 0:19:20- Flight number...- Wait, we're there for one whole day?- Yeah.
0:19:20 > 0:19:22COSMOS SIGHS DEEPLY
0:19:22 > 0:19:26- We should have just done what I said.- It's done now.- I told you.
0:19:26 > 0:19:30- OK, thank you.- Thanks. - Cheers, thanks. Wow.
0:19:30 > 0:19:33- Take these off us.- Told you I did not want to stop in China, bruv.
0:19:33 > 0:19:37- It's done now, innit? No point in stressing.- No, I might change it.
0:19:37 > 0:19:39Come on, let's go find my flight.
0:19:39 > 0:19:40I might scrap that, I don't give a shit.
0:19:40 > 0:19:43I don't want to be in China for a day.
0:19:43 > 0:19:45China is... I don't like it.
0:19:45 > 0:19:47With the unexpected Chinese stopover,
0:19:47 > 0:19:50it's going to be a 53-hour journey back to London.
0:19:50 > 0:19:52We've got a ticket and it's a load of crap,
0:19:52 > 0:19:55cos we have to stop in China for 24 hours.
0:19:55 > 0:19:57And they haven't really told us
0:19:57 > 0:20:01much apart from we're going to China, which I don't want to do.
0:20:01 > 0:20:05So now I'm off to try and find another flight.
0:20:05 > 0:20:08So that was a waste of money in my eyes. And time.
0:20:08 > 0:20:12Customer service can be an imprecise art, but as Cosmos and Harry
0:20:12 > 0:20:15head off, at least the Tourist Police can get back to their work.
0:20:32 > 0:20:35Downstairs in the medical centre, the docs are having dinner -
0:20:35 > 0:20:39a spicy papaya salad not recommended for first-timers.
0:20:39 > 0:20:41SHE SPEAKS THAI
0:20:47 > 0:20:54We have a lot of Thai food that makes people diarrhoea.
0:20:54 > 0:20:57LAUGHTER
0:20:57 > 0:20:59Sometimes it's smelly.
0:20:59 > 0:21:05Yeah, if you eat it too many days it can turn to be very smelly.
0:21:05 > 0:21:07I will have constipation tomorrow morning.
0:21:10 > 0:21:12You know what I mean, right?
0:21:12 > 0:21:15The medical team love it, but for the Western tourists,
0:21:15 > 0:21:17Thai food can take a bit of getting used to.
0:21:17 > 0:21:23I was sick everywhere. Everywhere. Look at that on my leg. Sick.
0:21:23 > 0:21:28- Everywhere.- The doctors don't mind, it keeps them nice and busy.
0:21:29 > 0:21:31I've just been vomiting since 12 o'clock today,
0:21:31 > 0:21:35and yeah, just really sick.
0:21:35 > 0:21:40The latest victim is Tom. He's been puking all the way from Phuket.
0:21:40 > 0:21:44- Where are you going? - London Heathrow.- Oh, today?
0:21:44 > 0:21:47It's the first time I've ever got food poisoning.
0:21:47 > 0:21:50Woke up 4 o'clock this morning in Phuket for a 7am flight,
0:21:50 > 0:21:54and...just started throwing up straightaway.
0:21:54 > 0:21:57Just vomiting, so...
0:21:57 > 0:22:00Just like uni.
0:22:00 > 0:22:02Treating Tom today...
0:22:02 > 0:22:04- Sawadee ka.- ..is Dr Parn.
0:22:04 > 0:22:07I make this kind of case every day.
0:22:07 > 0:22:09If you suffer from food poisoning
0:22:09 > 0:22:13and you have dehydration or low blood pressure, you should not fly,
0:22:13 > 0:22:17because it's quite a high risk of fainting on board.
0:22:17 > 0:22:20But I've never seen a patient of food poisoning die in Thailand.
0:22:20 > 0:22:23So, take a deep breath in and out.
0:22:25 > 0:22:28Dr Parn begins her examination.
0:22:28 > 0:22:31- Is there any pain anywhere? - Just slight discomfort.
0:22:31 > 0:22:34- OK.- From pushing.
0:22:34 > 0:22:38She's pretty sure it's a common or garden case of Thai tummy.
0:22:38 > 0:22:42For the problem that you keep vomiting this morning,
0:22:42 > 0:22:43I can give you some medication.
0:22:43 > 0:22:47Yeah, sure, just as long as I get to the check-in desk.
0:22:47 > 0:22:49The nurse administers Tom's medication.
0:22:52 > 0:22:55If he's better I will prescribe tablets for him
0:22:55 > 0:22:56today and let him fly.
0:22:56 > 0:22:58He will be a little bit sleepy now
0:22:58 > 0:23:01and I hope the symptoms of vomiting and nausea already stop.
0:23:01 > 0:23:03- Thank you.- Please wait... - OK, thank you.
0:23:03 > 0:23:05SHE SPEAKS THAI
0:23:05 > 0:23:07Dr Parn orders half an hour's rest.
0:23:07 > 0:23:09SNORING
0:23:09 > 0:23:13But with that guy in the next bed, that's easier said than done.
0:23:13 > 0:23:15While Tom tires to sleep,
0:23:15 > 0:23:19Dr Parn creeps back to her office to indulge in her favourite pastime.
0:23:19 > 0:23:23Ah, I don't want to talk about the games. I'm so shy.
0:23:23 > 0:23:25Who told you this?
0:23:25 > 0:23:28Who told you about the games?
0:23:28 > 0:23:33Dr Parn's the latest fan of a craze that's sweeping the airport.
0:23:33 > 0:23:34Candy Crush.
0:23:37 > 0:23:42I keep playing it every day...until I reach the highest level now.
0:23:46 > 0:23:49The doctors should not play the games
0:23:49 > 0:23:52when we have a patient inside the clinic, no?
0:23:52 > 0:23:55CANDY CRUSH MUSIC
0:23:55 > 0:23:57DR PARN LAUGHS
0:23:57 > 0:24:00The Tourist Police are getting pretty good at it.
0:24:00 > 0:24:03All got quite a chill job. Just play with their phone all day.
0:24:03 > 0:24:05But Dr Parn is the champion.
0:24:05 > 0:24:09Don't talk with me about Candy Crush again, OK?
0:24:13 > 0:24:16Game over, and Dr Parn returns to check on Tom.
0:24:16 > 0:24:22- Excuse me. OK, how are you? - I'm very well, thank you.
0:24:22 > 0:24:26- Do you feel nausea?- No.- No nausea.
0:24:26 > 0:24:31- OK, maybe after this you can try to drink water, only a little bit.- OK.
0:24:31 > 0:24:34- If you feel fine, I will prescribe tablets for you.- OK, sure.
0:24:34 > 0:24:39So, Dr Parn clears Tom for take off, leaving another satisfied customer.
0:24:39 > 0:24:43Everyone's very helpful and professional and caring,
0:24:43 > 0:24:46and I think...things seem to work here.
0:24:58 > 0:25:00Upstairs in departures,
0:25:00 > 0:25:03the competition for the annual Airport Awards is hotting up.
0:25:03 > 0:25:08- On checking duty today is Officer Beam.- Boarding pass, please.
0:25:08 > 0:25:11Sounds like she's been practising her acceptance speech.
0:25:11 > 0:25:13I am cheerful, I love to smile,
0:25:13 > 0:25:16I am always ready to attend the needs of others.
0:25:16 > 0:25:18I love to serve people.
0:25:19 > 0:25:23But Beam could face a late challenge from her new colleague Barry.
0:25:23 > 0:25:27- How many do you have, sir, two? - Pardon?- Two?- Yeah.
0:25:27 > 0:25:29I love the service, because I have
0:25:29 > 0:25:31love for the passengers,
0:25:31 > 0:25:33because many, many passengers,
0:25:33 > 0:25:34it's not the same.
0:25:34 > 0:25:38We have to make each passenger feel satisfied about our service.
0:25:38 > 0:25:40We have to do our best.
0:25:40 > 0:25:43Barry's customer service skills have already made an impression on Beam.
0:25:43 > 0:25:47He can work very quickly and he is very clever I think,
0:25:47 > 0:25:49and he is very kind.
0:25:49 > 0:25:53- Yeah.- But is her interest more than professional?
0:25:53 > 0:25:55He is very lovely. BARRY LAUGHS
0:25:55 > 0:25:56SHE SPEAKS THAI
0:25:56 > 0:25:59She call me a meatball.
0:25:59 > 0:26:04He look like a meatball! I like him, I like to hug him.
0:26:04 > 0:26:06He is like a little baby.
0:26:08 > 0:26:10SHE SPEAKS THAI
0:26:10 > 0:26:15And, also he is, like...one of my team.
0:26:15 > 0:26:17THEY LAUGH
0:26:17 > 0:26:21Today, "Meatball" is trying to get backpackers Rosie and Jasna home.
0:26:21 > 0:26:24They've got an e-ticket, but the airline won't let them
0:26:24 > 0:26:26board without the card they bought it with,
0:26:26 > 0:26:28and that's long gone.
0:26:28 > 0:26:30To travel apparently we need the bank card that we
0:26:30 > 0:26:34paid for the flight with, which we lost about a week ago.
0:26:34 > 0:26:37Rosie hopes a copy of her bank statement will
0:26:37 > 0:26:39show proof of purchase.
0:26:39 > 0:26:42She's gone off to the other side of the airport to print that off,
0:26:42 > 0:26:44but going to have to re-pay for the whole entire ticket
0:26:44 > 0:26:47if we don't get this bank statement.
0:26:47 > 0:26:51We've only got an hour and ten minutes left till the flight.
0:26:51 > 0:26:53Thought I was going to have loads of time,
0:26:53 > 0:26:56was going to buy some perfume, get some cigarettes...
0:26:56 > 0:26:58Not going to happen now.
0:27:02 > 0:27:03Got it all printed now,
0:27:03 > 0:27:05so hopefully this is enough to get us on the flight.
0:27:09 > 0:27:11But back at the desk, Barry isn't satisfied.
0:27:13 > 0:27:17No, cos the card number will have changed now I've got a new card.
0:27:21 > 0:27:23No, it won't be on here.
0:27:25 > 0:27:29With no card number on the statement, Barry calls his manager.
0:27:31 > 0:27:32Knew this would happen.
0:27:35 > 0:27:37This has got to be our last bit of bad luck before we go.
0:27:37 > 0:27:39INDISTINCT
0:27:42 > 0:27:45Barry has bad news.
0:27:45 > 0:27:46I already consulted the manager,
0:27:46 > 0:27:49but normally you have to get the card number.
0:27:49 > 0:27:51But how am I meant to get the credit cad number
0:27:51 > 0:27:53when I haven't got the credit card?
0:27:53 > 0:27:56Credit card is lost, so I don't have the number,
0:27:56 > 0:27:58there's no way of getting it.
0:27:59 > 0:28:02With time running out, Barry starts clutching at straws.
0:28:04 > 0:28:07Can you remember the number? The card that you bought the ticket?
0:28:07 > 0:28:11No, because it's lost, it's a massive, long 12-digit number.
0:28:11 > 0:28:15- But with things looking bleak.... - May I have your passport?
0:28:15 > 0:28:18..Barry exercises his discretion.
0:28:18 > 0:28:22- I'm going to make a copy of your passport.- So is everything OK?
0:28:23 > 0:28:26That's OK, I accept you on board but you have to sign a form.
0:28:26 > 0:28:27That's fine.
0:28:27 > 0:28:30The form protects the airline against fraud.
0:28:30 > 0:28:32If there's a problem they can collect the cost of the flight
0:28:32 > 0:28:35direct from the girls' bank accounts.
0:28:35 > 0:28:38By this time, Rosie and Jasna will sign anything.
0:28:38 > 0:28:41I think it's all sorted now, think we're all good.
0:28:41 > 0:28:43They're going to let us on!
0:28:43 > 0:28:45It's another triumph for customer service.
0:28:45 > 0:28:49You have to solve the problem of all the passengers.
0:28:49 > 0:28:51Every day is a challenge.
0:28:51 > 0:28:53The girls get their tickets,
0:28:53 > 0:28:55and Barry gets a pat on the back from the boss.
0:28:55 > 0:29:00- Man of the year, man of the year. - Oh! Really?- For our team.
0:29:12 > 0:29:15It's departures where most things tend to go wrong.
0:29:15 > 0:29:18Teenagers Bijan, Sam and Mitchell have missed their flight
0:29:18 > 0:29:21after going on a bender in Bangkok.
0:29:21 > 0:29:23So we couldn't make it in time.
0:29:23 > 0:29:26So they're trying to get their folks back home to buy them new tickets.
0:29:26 > 0:29:28If you could somehow pay for it online,
0:29:28 > 0:29:31any flight towards Melbourne, I'll get on it.
0:29:31 > 0:29:35Bank of mum and dad bails them out, but they've got another problem.
0:29:35 > 0:29:36Every fucking time.
0:29:36 > 0:29:40The fourth member of the group, Will, has gone missing.
0:29:40 > 0:29:43He's a liability. Will is a liability.
0:29:44 > 0:29:47I don't have a choice now, my parents have just spent, like...
0:29:47 > 0:29:50Yeah, it's, like, 800 bucks.
0:29:50 > 0:29:52With their new flight leaving in 90 minutes,
0:29:52 > 0:29:55the boys have to check in without Will.
0:29:55 > 0:29:58Oh, my God, you can drink for free on this plane as well.
0:29:58 > 0:30:01As soon as they get their boarding cards, they get a message.
0:30:01 > 0:30:04Will's somewhere in the airport.
0:30:04 > 0:30:09Oh, my God. Probably walking around with a drip or something.
0:30:10 > 0:30:13- What happened to you? - I don't want to talk about it.
0:30:13 > 0:30:14THEY LAUGH
0:30:16 > 0:30:22Last night I woke up in some ditch, and I don't know how or when.
0:30:22 > 0:30:27And apparently I was 30k away from our hotel, so that was the story.
0:30:27 > 0:30:30Don't get drunk in Thailand, that's the key message.
0:30:30 > 0:30:34But it could be an expensive lesson if Will doesn't act fast.
0:30:34 > 0:30:40You have to buy an airline ticket, we've all bought one, we leave soon.
0:30:40 > 0:30:42- It's time to call home. - I missed my flight.
0:30:44 > 0:30:47Ugh, because Bangkok...
0:30:47 > 0:30:49The other guys have already booked a ticket,
0:30:49 > 0:30:51so I don't want to stay here by myself.
0:30:51 > 0:30:55I was wondering if I could use your frequent flyer points.
0:30:55 > 0:30:57Yeah, lifetime golden member, yes?
0:30:58 > 0:31:02OK, thank you, goodbye. All right, it's worth a shot.
0:31:04 > 0:31:08Armed with his mum's points, Will races to the desk.
0:31:08 > 0:31:11My mum is a lifetime Gold member.
0:31:14 > 0:31:16That's bullshit.
0:31:16 > 0:31:19There are some rules that can't be bent, and Will can't board,
0:31:19 > 0:31:22and his mates face an agonising decision.
0:31:22 > 0:31:23Or not.
0:31:23 > 0:31:25- I'm so angry right now. - I'll see you in Melbourne.
0:31:25 > 0:31:28So I'm probably going to have to spend another night here.
0:31:30 > 0:31:32- Good luck, mate.- Thanks. See you.
0:31:32 > 0:31:35All my friends have ditched me.
0:31:35 > 0:31:37I've got another buddy.
0:31:39 > 0:31:41Couldn't get a flight. She dogged me.
0:31:41 > 0:31:44- Bullshit.- She said to wait because...- Where's everyone else?
0:31:44 > 0:31:47They've gone through.
0:31:47 > 0:31:50- How do you go through? - I don't know. Bijan went up that way.
0:31:56 > 0:31:59I'll see you in Melbourne.
0:31:59 > 0:32:02Looks like Will's stranded in Bangkok,
0:32:02 > 0:32:05unless he can come up with a plan, and soon.
0:32:05 > 0:32:06Fuck. Fuck.
0:32:06 > 0:32:08Fucking bullshit.
0:32:11 > 0:32:14While Will ponders his future, Wayne
0:32:14 > 0:32:17and his friends are still in a party mood after a fun-filled three weeks.
0:32:17 > 0:32:21- British, innit? Look, I started it, I suppose.- Right.- That's it.
0:32:21 > 0:32:24Here we go. I need this one to wash this one down.
0:32:24 > 0:32:27They've got their tickets nice and safe,
0:32:27 > 0:32:29and some memories that'll never fade.
0:32:29 > 0:32:30Never get a tattoo in Thailand.
0:32:30 > 0:32:33It's supposedly "daughter". Apparently it's "doctor".
0:32:33 > 0:32:37And here's the phone number for my new Thai wife, Nani.
0:32:37 > 0:32:41Wayne's been keeping his friends Kirsty and Kirsty entertained.
0:32:41 > 0:32:43Apparently, he's an idiot abroad. That's what you said.
0:32:43 > 0:32:45That's what she said.
0:32:45 > 0:32:48Showing off. Look at that. Yeah. World's strongest man.
0:32:48 > 0:32:51- Wayne, which way to the beach? - That way to the beach.
0:32:51 > 0:32:53HE CHUCKLES
0:32:53 > 0:32:55Departures is that way.
0:32:57 > 0:32:59Go on, Aaron. Yeah!
0:32:59 > 0:33:02He's, like, made this holiday trip so funny for me.
0:33:02 > 0:33:04I literally...I've been so happy.
0:33:04 > 0:33:06But you can't take him into a restaurant.
0:33:06 > 0:33:09- No.- ..with your mum or your dad or your nan.
0:33:09 > 0:33:13Wayne's been on the beer every day. Shots for breakfast......
0:33:13 > 0:33:16- What have you got? Five shots? - Five shots.
0:33:16 > 0:33:18Breakfast.
0:33:18 > 0:33:21We know you like a book, Wayne.
0:33:21 > 0:33:24Passengers partying at the airport is nothing new.
0:33:24 > 0:33:26Beam's seen it all before.
0:33:28 > 0:33:31Some passengers, they strip, take off their clothes.
0:33:31 > 0:33:33Ooh, fuck me, that's strong.
0:33:33 > 0:33:37Some of them drink whisky in front of me.
0:33:38 > 0:33:42I just tell them, "Don't drink too much."
0:33:42 > 0:33:44Yeah, that should do the trick, Beam.
0:33:44 > 0:33:48As Terminator says, "I'll be back."
0:33:50 > 0:33:51Ooh, fuck, better get up.
0:33:51 > 0:33:54Wayne's trip to Thailand may have damaged his liver,
0:33:54 > 0:33:56but it's opened his eyes.
0:33:56 > 0:33:59It's the most spontaneous thing I've ever done in my life.
0:33:59 > 0:34:02And as soon as I get home, it's just work, work, work,
0:34:02 > 0:34:06and that's it, I'm coming straight back out to go travelling again.
0:34:06 > 0:34:08I've got to do it, I think.
0:34:08 > 0:34:11There's just so much to the world you haven't seen.
0:34:11 > 0:34:15I've been to the most beautiful places.
0:34:15 > 0:34:17One final mixer!
0:34:17 > 0:34:18Ciao!
0:34:27 > 0:34:30Appearances are everything at Bangkok Airport,
0:34:30 > 0:34:32at least for the staff.
0:34:32 > 0:34:35Customer service isn't just about helping people.
0:34:35 > 0:34:38You've got to look the part.
0:34:38 > 0:34:44A good appearance can create the good image of the airline.
0:34:44 > 0:34:47When passengers say, "Wow, she is very beautiful,
0:34:47 > 0:34:50"she look very cheerful, I want to talk to her,"
0:34:50 > 0:34:51something like that.
0:34:51 > 0:34:54Barry loves swapping fashion tips with the tourists.
0:34:54 > 0:34:59You've got the clashing stripes and check, which is a big trend.
0:34:59 > 0:35:00Exactly.
0:35:01 > 0:35:05You don't even need to do nothing. The tie here...
0:35:05 > 0:35:07Tuck there...
0:35:07 > 0:35:10INDISTINCT CHATTER
0:35:12 > 0:35:14Over at the information desk,
0:35:14 > 0:35:18Jibbydoo makes a point of always looking her best.
0:35:18 > 0:35:22Yes, Thai counter, we be friends to Westerners, be friends from Europe.
0:35:22 > 0:35:26We were taught to respect our uniforms.
0:35:26 > 0:35:30Yeah. To give the uniform the respect, and so,
0:35:30 > 0:35:35the uniform will remind us of what we're doing and what jobs we are in,
0:35:35 > 0:35:37and what our position is.
0:35:37 > 0:35:39The tourist police always look smart...
0:35:39 > 0:35:42They have this attitude about their uniforms,
0:35:42 > 0:35:44and they think they are so cool,
0:35:44 > 0:35:48they think they are Superman, Superwoman, in their uniforms.
0:35:48 > 0:35:49I don't know.
0:35:49 > 0:35:52..and the stewardesses always look chic.
0:35:52 > 0:35:55Every girl's dream, to be an air hostess.
0:35:55 > 0:35:59They look so perfect in their uniform, you know?
0:35:59 > 0:36:00They have curves!
0:36:00 > 0:36:02SHE GIGGLES
0:36:02 > 0:36:06Over at VAT refunds, the staff are always well turned out.
0:36:06 > 0:36:08It's their job to pay back the VAT on the items
0:36:08 > 0:36:10you've bought on holiday.
0:36:10 > 0:36:13It's not the most taxing job, but it can be rewarding.
0:36:13 > 0:36:18In the morning, my boss give money, big money, to me.
0:36:18 > 0:36:22The tourists come to me
0:36:22 > 0:36:24and I give money to them.
0:36:24 > 0:36:28Bay has developed his own rules for customer service.
0:36:28 > 0:36:31HE SPEAKS IN THAI
0:36:31 > 0:36:34First, I say good morning.
0:36:34 > 0:36:38- Good morning.- Good morning. - Yes, sir, can I help you?
0:36:38 > 0:36:40- Good morning.- Morning!
0:36:40 > 0:36:42You're both very nice.
0:36:42 > 0:36:47I love to smile with them and say hello to them.
0:36:47 > 0:36:50Excuse me? Where did you buy your bag?
0:36:50 > 0:36:52In Argentina.
0:36:52 > 0:36:55- What? - In Argentina. In my country.
0:36:55 > 0:36:57Oh. It's very nice.
0:36:57 > 0:36:58Yes.
0:36:58 > 0:37:00THEY LAUGH
0:37:00 > 0:37:02The tourist application...
0:37:04 > 0:37:07One, two, three, four, five.
0:37:07 > 0:37:09Thank you.
0:37:09 > 0:37:13..and the tourist is very happy when they get money back.
0:37:13 > 0:37:16It is big money for you.
0:37:17 > 0:37:20And if the tourists are happy, then Bay is happy too.
0:37:20 > 0:37:23I'm feeling happy. And happy.
0:37:25 > 0:37:27Thank you. Welcome back.
0:37:27 > 0:37:29- Thank you very much.- You're welcome.
0:37:29 > 0:37:33At Bangkok Airport, the smile is all part of the service.
0:37:33 > 0:37:35You come to Thailand, you be happy.
0:37:35 > 0:37:37Welcome to Thailand.
0:37:44 > 0:37:47Deserted by his friends and desperate to get home,
0:37:47 > 0:37:49Will spent the afternoon testing
0:37:49 > 0:37:52the airport's customer service values to the max.
0:37:52 > 0:37:54Does a frequent flyer cover that?
0:37:54 > 0:37:57Is there another flight at any stage today?
0:37:59 > 0:38:01It's a lifetime Gold member.
0:38:01 > 0:38:03I'm pissed off.
0:38:03 > 0:38:06Is there one that I can get direct to Melbourne?
0:38:06 > 0:38:10There's no way I want to spend another night in Bangkok.
0:38:10 > 0:38:12Is it possible to go via Singapore?
0:38:16 > 0:38:20Get me the fuck out of this fucking hellhole.
0:38:20 > 0:38:23My mum is a lifetime Gold member.
0:38:27 > 0:38:30# And I don't know where I'm going
0:38:30 > 0:38:32# And I don't know where I'm going
0:38:32 > 0:38:34# Take me home... #
0:38:34 > 0:38:36Eventually, Will gets lucky.
0:38:36 > 0:38:39His original airline has a flight leaving in 24 hours,
0:38:39 > 0:38:42and he only needs to cough up £80 to transfer his ticket.
0:38:42 > 0:38:46I'll take tomorrow's flight, for the 4,000 baht, tomorrow.
0:38:49 > 0:38:51Sorted it all out.
0:38:51 > 0:38:55But it does mean another night in Bangkok on his own.
0:38:57 > 0:39:01Do I trust myself? That's the question.
0:39:08 > 0:39:09Hello!
0:39:09 > 0:39:12Down at the airport medical centre,
0:39:12 > 0:39:15the day shift is winding down after another rewarding day.
0:39:15 > 0:39:17Bye-bye.
0:39:17 > 0:39:20All the doctors and nurses here love their work.
0:39:21 > 0:39:24I am very happy. Everyone.
0:39:24 > 0:39:27Several of the team have hidden talents, even secret passions.
0:39:27 > 0:39:31Dr Parn has a hobby she loves even more than Candy Crush.
0:39:31 > 0:39:33She's a plane-spotter.
0:39:33 > 0:39:35I love the aircraft, the airplanes.
0:39:35 > 0:39:38I love it, and I cannot explain why I love that,
0:39:38 > 0:39:40but I love to see it.
0:39:40 > 0:39:44If I have a case inside the air sight area, I can spot the aircraft,
0:39:44 > 0:39:47see the aircraft taking off and landing,
0:39:47 > 0:39:48and it's fantastic.
0:39:48 > 0:39:50Dr Parn gets her tip-off.
0:39:50 > 0:39:53A plane has just touched down with an unusual livery.
0:39:53 > 0:39:56You can see that, with the heart.
0:39:57 > 0:39:59You can see that livery at the tail,
0:39:59 > 0:40:02especially in the heart sign...
0:40:02 > 0:40:05And Dr Parn's no ordinary plane-spotter.
0:40:05 > 0:40:08She's an award-winning plane-spotter.
0:40:08 > 0:40:11Dr Parn, she was in a quiz show about airlines.
0:40:11 > 0:40:14She looks at the tails and she looks at the aircraft,
0:40:14 > 0:40:17she knows what it is. It's so cool.
0:40:17 > 0:40:22I'm so proud to be the winner of that game show.
0:40:22 > 0:40:25I'm so proud about the prize, the aircraft model.
0:40:26 > 0:40:29And Dr Parn's not the only celebrity in the medical centre.
0:40:29 > 0:40:33Meet Dr Geng - by day he's a hardworking medic.
0:40:33 > 0:40:36By night, he's a pop singer, and he's about to switch roles.
0:40:36 > 0:40:40I have to go to record the voice, the song,
0:40:40 > 0:40:43for my new single.
0:40:43 > 0:40:47That is my...my hobby.
0:40:47 > 0:40:49My part-time job.
0:40:49 > 0:40:51Actually, I...
0:40:51 > 0:40:55I sing...suck.
0:40:55 > 0:40:57HE SINGS
0:40:57 > 0:40:59Dr Geng's being modest.
0:40:59 > 0:41:02He shot to fame a few years - and several hairstyles - ago
0:41:02 > 0:41:04on Thailand's answer to the X Factor,
0:41:04 > 0:41:07much to the amusement of his colleagues.
0:41:07 > 0:41:09It's funny.
0:41:10 > 0:41:14He is funny because he has a baby face.
0:41:15 > 0:41:18AUDIENCE SCREAMS
0:41:18 > 0:41:21But Geng tries to keep his two careers apart.
0:41:21 > 0:41:24I have to separate the role, OK?
0:41:24 > 0:41:26This is doctor role, OK?
0:41:26 > 0:41:30I am the doctor, so I treat the patient.
0:41:30 > 0:41:34I don't sing while I am doing a doctor job, OK?
0:41:34 > 0:41:38But in the toilet, I sing.
0:41:38 > 0:41:40Just kidding!
0:41:42 > 0:41:45Tonight, Dr Geng's off to the recording studio,
0:41:45 > 0:41:49once he's fought his way through his adoring fans.
0:41:49 > 0:41:52- Geng is very good.- Yes. I love him.
0:41:52 > 0:41:55I have the photo.
0:42:05 > 0:42:08As Dr Geng heads into the city,
0:42:08 > 0:42:11it looks Will has found a room for the night.
0:42:11 > 0:42:13Seems fine by me.
0:42:15 > 0:42:17Yep. A few semen stains.
0:42:17 > 0:42:20I don't even care. I'm going to be drunk, so whatever.
0:42:25 > 0:42:29Despite missing his original flight after an all-night bender,
0:42:29 > 0:42:33Will hits the Khao San Road for the second time in two nights.
0:42:33 > 0:42:36Go by a pharmacy.
0:42:38 > 0:42:40Seriously, go by a pharmacy.
0:42:41 > 0:42:43Want a Xanax.
0:42:43 > 0:42:46Will's bought a prescription sedative
0:42:46 > 0:42:49which can be dangerous when mixed with alcohol.
0:42:49 > 0:42:50It's banned in Thailand
0:42:50 > 0:42:53but it can still be bought under the counter at some pharmacies.
0:42:53 > 0:42:56Looks like we're in for a good night.
0:42:56 > 0:43:01Get one more beer and then my memory's going to be wiped.
0:43:12 > 0:43:15Right now, I don't know, I've taken four.
0:43:15 > 0:43:20But...but, if this was a non, like, trying-to-get-fucked-up situation,
0:43:20 > 0:43:24this was a normal situation, you're meant to take two anyway.
0:43:24 > 0:43:27So I've only taken double the regular dose.
0:43:27 > 0:43:29Does that make sense?
0:43:29 > 0:43:31Not really, mate,
0:43:31 > 0:43:35and when in doubt, it's always best to consult your doctor.
0:43:35 > 0:43:38THEY SING NOTES
0:43:43 > 0:43:45Across town, in a Bangkok recording studio,
0:43:45 > 0:43:48Dr Geng is warming up his vocal cords,
0:43:48 > 0:43:51but those long shifts at the airport mean he's not had a chance to
0:43:51 > 0:43:53master the new material.
0:43:53 > 0:43:57The melody has changed and the tune has changed
0:43:57 > 0:44:00from the original that I heard.
0:44:00 > 0:44:05The thing is going to be good but the thing I prepared for
0:44:05 > 0:44:09not that much as maybe
0:44:09 > 0:44:11mega trouble to the sound engineer.
0:44:11 > 0:44:15But once in the voice booth, the magic happens.
0:44:15 > 0:44:19HE SINGS
0:44:32 > 0:44:35His producer's happy, and the night's still young,
0:44:35 > 0:44:38but Geng's too tired to rock'n'roll.
0:44:38 > 0:44:41I'm going to go and eat my food for dinner,
0:44:41 > 0:44:46and then I'm going to go back to my home and read my Bible, OK?
0:44:47 > 0:44:50While Geng goes home to read the Bible,
0:44:50 > 0:44:53Will's still popping pills on the Khao San Road.
0:44:53 > 0:44:56- So, I've had five. - Show me the packet.
0:44:56 > 0:44:58Five. That's not even that many.
0:45:00 > 0:45:05It's when you have more than five, your brain starts to go loopy.
0:45:08 > 0:45:11THEY CHEER
0:45:11 > 0:45:14Will runs into some tourists who've been stuck here
0:45:14 > 0:45:16since the late '60s.
0:45:16 > 0:45:18We're in Bangkok, living the dream.
0:45:18 > 0:45:21Viva la, baby. Anything goes.
0:45:21 > 0:45:24Just don't drink their mushroom shakes.
0:45:24 > 0:45:26Why's that? They'll fuck you up?
0:45:26 > 0:45:28No, they're great.
0:45:28 > 0:45:31- Good times.- Fuck.
0:45:31 > 0:45:35- We brought a couple of bottles of acid out here, you know?- Yeah?
0:45:35 > 0:45:39- No!- Yeah.- No, we did not. He's lying.
0:45:39 > 0:45:42- He's lying about that.- You don't need to tell me about that.- Exactly.
0:45:42 > 0:45:45- Nice to meet you, mate.- See you guys.
0:45:45 > 0:45:49- See you, brother. - Yeah, brother.- Have a good one.
0:45:49 > 0:45:52Just the drunken antics.
0:45:58 > 0:46:01As Will pops his sixth pill of the night,
0:46:01 > 0:46:04will he be missing his second flight of the week?
0:46:11 > 0:46:13It's good.
0:46:27 > 0:46:31A new day dawns at Bangkok Airport, and it's a big one, too.
0:46:34 > 0:46:37The annual airport awards are just hours away.
0:46:40 > 0:46:42Rehearsals are in full swing.
0:46:42 > 0:46:46You don't get this kind of thing at Luton Airport.
0:46:46 > 0:46:49As the excitement builds, down in baggage reclaim,
0:46:49 > 0:46:51it's business as usual.
0:46:51 > 0:46:55More than 60 million bags and cases come through the airport every year.
0:46:55 > 0:46:59Per and Awta help track down the ones that get away.
0:47:03 > 0:47:06A funny thing that I find is when the bags come out
0:47:06 > 0:47:10and the passenger just runs to the bag and, "My bag! My Bag!"
0:47:10 > 0:47:12It's very funny,
0:47:12 > 0:47:18and they're chasing the bag like the bag is going to run from them.
0:47:18 > 0:47:21Once you've picked up your bags, you tend not to hang around,
0:47:21 > 0:47:24but Ali and Shannon picked up their luggage last night
0:47:24 > 0:47:27and this morning, they're still here.
0:47:27 > 0:47:30We've been waiting here now about nearly 12 hours, I think,
0:47:30 > 0:47:33which is a bit too long.
0:47:33 > 0:47:36But we literally just sat on the seats
0:47:36 > 0:47:40and went to sleep with our blankets and towels.
0:47:40 > 0:47:43Ali is waiting for he best friend Tracy to arrive.
0:47:43 > 0:47:46Her new best friend Shannon has offered to keep her company.
0:47:46 > 0:47:49Per and Awta are puzzled.
0:47:49 > 0:47:53They don't know which flight their friend get in to...
0:47:53 > 0:47:57so they're insisting on waiting here.
0:47:57 > 0:48:00Baggage reclaim is good for reclaiming baggage,
0:48:00 > 0:48:02but it's rubbish for anything else.
0:48:02 > 0:48:05We haven't eaten yet. We haven't had breakfast.
0:48:05 > 0:48:08We had a snack on a tiny little muesli bar,
0:48:08 > 0:48:10and that's about it.
0:48:10 > 0:48:14There is no restaurant or shops for them to hang out...
0:48:14 > 0:48:18There isn't somewhere to have breakfast or lunch, like that.
0:48:18 > 0:48:21I actually haven't had anything to drink either,
0:48:21 > 0:48:25cos we were a little bit sceptical about the water here,
0:48:25 > 0:48:28and there's nowhere to buy water, so...
0:48:28 > 0:48:30There's a tempting selection of shops
0:48:30 > 0:48:33and restaurants the other side of customs,
0:48:33 > 0:48:35but once they go through they can't get back,
0:48:35 > 0:48:39and with a flat phone, Ali doesn't want to risk missing her friend.
0:48:39 > 0:48:42Her flight's due in at 12.05, but I'm just going to double-check
0:48:42 > 0:48:44the board, and hopefully it's not delayed.
0:48:44 > 0:48:46Fingers crossed.
0:48:46 > 0:48:49Cos I am actually buzzing to see her. I cannot wait.
0:48:51 > 0:48:53Oh, no, it's delayed!
0:48:55 > 0:48:57It's delayed by half an hour.
0:48:58 > 0:49:0130 minutes is nothing for a baggage hall veteran,
0:49:01 > 0:49:03and the time flies by.
0:49:03 > 0:49:04The queue was pretty long.
0:49:04 > 0:49:08Like, last night, we waited an hour to get through that queue.
0:49:08 > 0:49:09Yeah.
0:49:09 > 0:49:11Now Ali just needs to pick Tracy out
0:49:11 > 0:49:14from the 80,000 other passengers who land every day.
0:49:14 > 0:49:17Hopefully she didn't walk past me already.
0:49:17 > 0:49:20Ali's got Shannon looking out the other end of the carousel.
0:49:20 > 0:49:22Ali's over there, still waiting.
0:49:22 > 0:49:25But Shannon's never actually met Tracy.
0:49:25 > 0:49:27I should have told Shannon what she looks like in case she goes
0:49:27 > 0:49:30over there, and I don't see her.
0:49:30 > 0:49:32Maybe that was a rookie mistake.
0:49:35 > 0:49:37She's about my height,
0:49:37 > 0:49:40- and she's really curly haired.- OK.
0:49:43 > 0:49:45It's really curly.
0:49:45 > 0:49:48It's like ringlet-y curly hair she has.
0:49:48 > 0:49:51After all that, it's Tracy who finds Ali,
0:49:51 > 0:49:54and there's not a curly hair on her head.
0:49:54 > 0:49:57Are you OK? What's going on?
0:49:57 > 0:49:59That's her!
0:49:59 > 0:50:01Ali introduces Tracy to Shannon,
0:50:01 > 0:50:04Tracy tells Ali and Shannon how she had her hair straightened,
0:50:04 > 0:50:07and after their 16-hour mini-break in baggage reclaim,
0:50:07 > 0:50:09the girls are off on the rest of their holiday.
0:50:14 > 0:50:17Up in departures, Beam is boarding another plane load of Brits,
0:50:17 > 0:50:21among them Tom, none the worst for that food poisoning scare.
0:50:21 > 0:50:24- I'm going to London Heathrow. - Yes. Passport, please.
0:50:26 > 0:50:28Thank you.
0:50:30 > 0:50:33I went to the medical centre, cos I've had food poisoning,
0:50:33 > 0:50:37- I've been very ill, so they gave me a certificate to fly.- Ah.
0:50:37 > 0:50:41And asked maybe if I could...if there are any available seats,
0:50:41 > 0:50:45- maybe nearer the toilet or an aisle seat. Yeah?- OK, sir.
0:50:45 > 0:50:48- One moment, please. - Or business class(!)
0:50:48 > 0:50:50Business class? You may pay!
0:50:50 > 0:50:53Never mind, Tom, it was worth a shot.
0:50:53 > 0:50:56If it was me, I'd want to be upgraded as well.
0:50:56 > 0:50:58When I feel not well, when I feel sick,
0:50:58 > 0:51:01I want to sleep and sleep on the business class,
0:51:01 > 0:51:04so that's normal, but try to deal with them,
0:51:04 > 0:51:08try to explain to them that it is a little bit against the rules...
0:51:08 > 0:51:11Tom makes do with a seat near the toilet,
0:51:11 > 0:51:15but the knockback from, Beam, like his vomiting and diarrhoea,
0:51:15 > 0:51:17won't put him back coming back to Thailand.
0:51:17 > 0:51:21I love this place and it's certainly not the last time I'm coming back.
0:51:22 > 0:51:24Tom's not the only one heading home.
0:51:24 > 0:51:27Defying the odds, and medical science,
0:51:27 > 0:51:30Will has made it back to the airport on time.
0:51:30 > 0:51:32At last, he's homeward bound.
0:51:32 > 0:51:35I could be home, in my bed, in 18 hours,
0:51:35 > 0:51:37which sounds pretty bloody good.
0:51:39 > 0:51:41That's my thinking fingers.
0:51:41 > 0:51:45Thailand's a weird place and it does weird things to weird people.
0:51:45 > 0:51:48Don't go to Thailand if you want your sanity kept.
0:51:50 > 0:51:54And now I'm in Bangkok Airport, which is bloody huge
0:51:54 > 0:51:56and I don't know what I'm doing right now.
0:51:56 > 0:51:58Hey, mate. How's it going?
0:51:58 > 0:52:00You're flying tonight?
0:52:00 > 0:52:04- Yesterday, cos on the 23rd, I had a flight booked.- You missed the plane.
0:52:04 > 0:52:07- That's right. Yeah. So, you remember me?- Yes.- Of course.
0:52:07 > 0:52:11I've never met that person in my life, but apparently I have, so...
0:52:11 > 0:52:14# So wake me up when it's all over
0:52:14 > 0:52:18# When I'm wiser and I'm older
0:52:18 > 0:52:23# All this time I was finding myself... #
0:52:23 > 0:52:25How much are the noodles? What are these?
0:52:25 > 0:52:29Are these good or bad? Not...not too spicy?
0:52:29 > 0:52:32- But after dawdling at the shops... - And that. I'm going to be a pig.
0:52:32 > 0:52:35300.
0:52:35 > 0:52:37..he's running late again.
0:52:37 > 0:52:40If I miss this flight again, I'm actually fucked.
0:52:44 > 0:52:47Oh, shit. Enjoy!
0:52:53 > 0:52:56Will's going to miss the main event,
0:52:56 > 0:52:58because the annual airport awards are underway.
0:52:58 > 0:53:02In an airport where the customer comes first,
0:53:02 > 0:53:04the boss is rewarding the best of the best.
0:53:04 > 0:53:06I am very proud of my airport.
0:53:06 > 0:53:09It's our pride, pride of the nation.
0:53:09 > 0:53:12You see my smile? A big smile.
0:53:12 > 0:53:16But everyone's waiting for the big one, the award for customer service.
0:53:16 > 0:53:18MUSIC PLAYS
0:53:20 > 0:53:25After a show-stopping performance by a Bangkok dance troupe,
0:53:25 > 0:53:27the winner is finally announced.
0:53:27 > 0:53:29Will it be Teay from the tourist police,
0:53:29 > 0:53:33Parn the plane-spotter, or Geng, the singing doctor?
0:53:33 > 0:53:36No, it's Bay,
0:53:36 > 0:53:38and the VAT refunds team!
0:53:41 > 0:53:45I'm proud. I'm proud. Really, I'm proud.
0:53:48 > 0:53:51See this certificate?
0:53:51 > 0:53:53I love my work.
0:53:53 > 0:53:56I love my job. I love tourists.
0:54:00 > 0:54:02Next time at Bangkok Airport -
0:54:02 > 0:54:06things get lost in translation at police HQ.
0:54:06 > 0:54:08You told me to fucking shut up!
0:54:08 > 0:54:11OK? When my daughter was missing!
0:54:11 > 0:54:13There's confusion in customs as Helena from Moscow
0:54:13 > 0:54:15tries to bring in her cat.
0:54:15 > 0:54:19- How long are you staying here, ma'am? SLURRED:- ..Go home...
0:54:19 > 0:54:22She is extremely drunk.
0:54:22 > 0:54:26We meet Captain A, the airport's bossiest immigration officer.
0:54:26 > 0:54:28Back in the line!
0:54:28 > 0:54:31And Hannah gets stuck at the airport after a bad fall,
0:54:31 > 0:54:35when we check in again at Bangkok Airport.