0:01:44 > 0:01:46'Merry Christmas!'
0:01:46 > 0:01:51'What we've all been waiting for - Santa and his reindeer. Merry Christmas, Santa!'
0:01:51 > 0:01:54'It's a present from a dear friend.'
0:01:54 > 0:01:56SCREECHING
0:01:57 > 0:02:01'Folks, there'll be no snow this Christmas.'
0:02:01 > 0:02:03Would this be terrific? Huh?
0:02:03 > 0:02:07Yeah. $600. Oh.
0:02:07 > 0:02:09Hey, Mary Beth, look at this.
0:02:09 > 0:02:12"Command attack submarine -
0:02:12 > 0:02:17"shoots off missiles, lights up, has eight removable crewmen."
0:02:17 > 0:02:20Do you think he'd like that?
0:02:20 > 0:02:22He won't like it. Oh.
0:02:23 > 0:02:26OK.
0:02:26 > 0:02:29So Samuels will probably let us off when? Eight o'clock at the latest.
0:02:29 > 0:02:33Dory coming over? Yeah, we're cooking dinner.
0:02:33 > 0:02:35Mary Beth,
0:02:35 > 0:02:38the man makes me crazy!
0:02:38 > 0:02:45Harv and I are going to wrap presents for the kids, then trim the tree, get the turkey ready.
0:02:45 > 0:02:48Call that fun? Yes, I do. Oh, there it is.
0:02:52 > 0:02:56It's perfect. Oh, look at that - it's great!
0:02:56 > 0:02:58Electric rescue chopper.
0:02:58 > 0:03:01You think it's him? It's him.
0:03:02 > 0:03:04All right.
0:03:08 > 0:03:12Hey, Mary Beth, look at that guy over there - tweed top coat.
0:03:12 > 0:03:14Oh, excuse me.
0:03:14 > 0:03:21Don't look. I can't help it! Don't - he'll do something, then we'll have to arrest him, and... Don't look!
0:03:21 > 0:03:26Excuse me. Ah, I told you we shouldn't have looked.
0:03:27 > 0:03:32You gotta be crazy! $80 for Handel's Messiah!
0:03:32 > 0:03:34It's a very special date...
0:03:34 > 0:03:39if the lieutenant ever gets back to let us go. He'll get back.
0:03:39 > 0:03:44Come 9 o'clock, Isbecki and the twins head southward to old San Juan
0:03:44 > 0:03:48for a week of sun, sand and... who knows what?
0:03:48 > 0:03:54You take Lieutenant Samuels' goodwill for granted. He doesn't have to let us go early.
0:03:54 > 0:04:01Lighten up, Petrie - your baby's going to be born soon. I got $30 on a Christmas baby.
0:04:01 > 0:04:03How many days is Claudia over?
0:04:05 > 0:04:08Today makes 11. That's too long.
0:04:11 > 0:04:14Must be tough, waiting like this.
0:04:14 > 0:04:19Thanks, Petrie. Hey, any news about your kid? Not yet.
0:04:24 > 0:04:31What's that? He made a collar! Guy was posing like he worked for a charity. He clipped Samuels good!
0:04:31 > 0:04:36He threw away a Christmas! A lieutenant can pull strings.
0:04:36 > 0:04:41Petrie! Your baby on its way yet? Not yet.
0:04:41 > 0:04:43It'll come soon. Trust me.
0:04:43 > 0:04:48What do you think of my collar? Not everyone collars Santa.
0:04:48 > 0:04:53Hey, felony, larceny - worst kind of lice! Praying on people's goodwill.
0:04:53 > 0:04:58I took care of the paperwork. You want to put this clown in a cell?
0:04:58 > 0:05:02I gotta talk to the brass. Do a little bragging!
0:05:02 > 0:05:05How much you clip him for? $5.
0:05:09 > 0:05:14You know, my first kid was nine days late. Second one was a week early.
0:05:14 > 0:05:17These things happen, you know.
0:05:17 > 0:05:22That's what the doctor keeps saying. Yeah, well. Hi, how you doing?
0:05:24 > 0:05:27I guess you live and learn.
0:05:28 > 0:05:30My oldest is a girl.
0:05:30 > 0:05:35Hope you get a girl, too - they're terrific! Would be nice. Yeah.
0:05:36 > 0:05:39So, eh, you think it will snow?
0:05:40 > 0:05:44That'd be nice, too, but they say no. Ah. Yeah.
0:05:44 > 0:05:47Merry Christmas. Yeah, you too.
0:05:52 > 0:05:54He's a nice guy, huh?
0:06:08 > 0:06:11Have a good one.
0:06:20 > 0:06:23SIREN BLARES
0:06:23 > 0:06:28What am I going to tell my kids, Willie? Watch your head.
0:06:28 > 0:06:35I'll be spending Christmas without my kids! Can I help it if I've got "seasonal employment"?
0:06:35 > 0:06:39Tonight could be a big grosser for me. Good hunting, huh?
0:06:39 > 0:06:42How much do you want him? I don't!
0:06:42 > 0:06:45Hey, Banks. Need help with this guy?
0:06:45 > 0:06:53We'd rather not spend tomorrow in court. Be a man - take one step closer to becoming a detective.
0:06:53 > 0:06:57Take this collar for us. He's a simple pickpocket. No offence.
0:06:57 > 0:07:04How much? What? I can't believe it - like a piece of bad meat, I can't be given away. You hold your tongue.
0:07:04 > 0:07:11How much? Piece of your next murder. Something with headline potential. You got it. Deal.
0:07:11 > 0:07:13Let's go.
0:07:15 > 0:07:20Victor, is the lieutenant here? No, he's upstairs with the brass.
0:07:20 > 0:07:27Petrie, any word about the baby? Guess not. Message for Miss Cagney. Thanks. Did the wallet show up yet?
0:07:27 > 0:07:30What wallet? Guess not.
0:07:30 > 0:07:32Remember? Bait from Internal Affairs.
0:07:32 > 0:07:37How long's he going to be up there? Another few minutes. Harv...?
0:07:37 > 0:07:44Sticking us with a loaded wallet to see if we'll take the money! You'd think they'd try something new -
0:07:44 > 0:07:50they've been using it every Christmas for 16 years! The same wallet!
0:07:50 > 0:07:53Been there long? I've only been here a moment.
0:07:53 > 0:08:00Thought I'd get a start on the duck. I can't wait. I'm looking at eight at the latest.
0:08:00 > 0:08:04That's none too soon - I'm very hungry. Mmm!
0:08:06 > 0:08:09Um, there's a bottle in the fridge.
0:08:09 > 0:08:11Have a glass. Have two.
0:08:11 > 0:08:16I'll be there. Mark, there's a call coming through from your wife.
0:08:16 > 0:08:19Wants to know when you'll be home.
0:08:19 > 0:08:24Got a release form for your prisoner, um, public drunkenness.
0:08:24 > 0:08:30Sarge wants me to give him coffee. OK. Cage. Keys are on the hook.
0:08:30 > 0:08:33Sign this, huh?
0:08:35 > 0:08:42OK, Bert, but now I'm telling you, if this guy isn't eight feet tall, I'm gonna call you a liar.
0:08:42 > 0:08:49How often does a desk jockey get to prove himself in the trenches? Not often enough.
0:08:49 > 0:08:54My chest still hurts from where this guy hit me - I got a huge bruise.
0:08:56 > 0:09:00Happy holidays! Isbecki. Thank you. Cagney. Inspector.
0:09:00 > 0:09:05La Guardia. Yeah. And Macy. Lacey, sir. Yeah.
0:09:05 > 0:09:08MERRY CHRISTMAS! Where's Santa?
0:09:08 > 0:09:13The accidental release of a prisoner is inexcusable.
0:09:13 > 0:09:19This sort of error demands a disciplinary hearing. What if that guy kills someone?
0:09:20 > 0:09:23The department is responsible.
0:09:24 > 0:09:27Financially and morally.
0:09:27 > 0:09:34I don't care if it was an accident and I don't care if no one individual is at fault. Bert, YOU're in command.
0:09:34 > 0:09:40YOU have the final responsibility. Believe me, you WILL answer for it.
0:09:44 > 0:09:46Merry Christmas(!)
0:09:51 > 0:09:53I wanted to be a nice guy.
0:09:55 > 0:09:57I wanted to let everybody go early.
0:09:58 > 0:10:01Maybe I'm just too lax.
0:10:03 > 0:10:09You will find this maniac! Hopefully, before he commits other crimes!
0:10:10 > 0:10:12You will find him...
0:10:12 > 0:10:16or nobody's gonna leave here...EVER!
0:10:21 > 0:10:29Sir, we can't tell you how truly sorry we are. That's great, Lacey. I can use that defence in a trial!
0:10:31 > 0:10:33Get out of here!
0:10:58 > 0:11:00Come in!
0:11:03 > 0:11:08What do you two want? Sir, we got back that file on the ex-prisoner
0:11:08 > 0:11:13and things are not as bad as they seem. Who are you kidding?
0:11:13 > 0:11:17No, sir - not kidding. Here, look at the file.
0:11:17 > 0:11:19Right there.
0:11:19 > 0:11:22Ralph Barbinski?
0:11:22 > 0:11:28He told me his name was Rawley Henshaw. Prints kicked back the right file here, sir.
0:11:28 > 0:11:33Look, priors - gambling, possession of stolen merchandise, petty fraud.
0:11:33 > 0:11:38It's very plain we're dealing with a small-time operator.
0:11:38 > 0:11:45Sir, the man's last arrest was six years ago. He had two months at the work farm, two years on parole.
0:11:45 > 0:11:50Look at that record, sir - as clean as a plate. Until tonight. Yes, sir.
0:11:50 > 0:11:56We just want you to know we'll be breaking our necks to nail this guy.
0:11:56 > 0:12:02Isbecki's pushing back his flight and La Guardia's cancelling his date. Arrears traffic violations!
0:12:02 > 0:12:07We're not talking about public enemy number one!
0:12:07 > 0:12:10PHONE RINGS Samuels.
0:12:10 > 0:12:13Yeah.
0:12:13 > 0:12:15What?
0:12:15 > 0:12:18Right, yeah.
0:12:18 > 0:12:23I'm certainly very glad that you two are going to be breaking your necks.
0:12:23 > 0:12:29Start by breaking your neck over to Barbinski's last address. Why?
0:12:29 > 0:12:36Don't you ever ask me why! They found a radio car missing from the parking bay, that's why!
0:12:36 > 0:12:43One of the mechanics said that the guy who drove the car away was dressed like Santa Claus! Ralph?
0:12:43 > 0:12:45Couldn't be Ralph.
0:12:49 > 0:12:53ENGINE CUTS OUT, HE TRIES TO RESTART IT
0:12:53 > 0:12:57HORNS BLARE
0:13:03 > 0:13:10Still no answer - I must've missed her. Damn! Maybe she's powdering her nose. Call her back in ten minutes.
0:13:10 > 0:13:15We're supposed to take a cab to Carnegie Hall in ten minutes!
0:13:15 > 0:13:18Isbecki, La Guardia!
0:13:18 > 0:13:22Tow truck garage over on 36th? I know it.
0:13:22 > 0:13:29A guy dressed like Santa Claus brought an RMP in there for emergency service, then charged it to me.
0:13:29 > 0:13:30La Guardia.
0:13:33 > 0:13:36Doris. Thank you very much.
0:13:36 > 0:13:43I've been trying to reach you for over an hour. I've got to work. We're gonna miss Handel's Messiah.
0:13:43 > 0:13:46Here, you take the tickets - you go.
0:13:46 > 0:13:53There's more to Christmas Eve together than that. You go, do your job - I'll be here when you return.
0:13:53 > 0:13:57You can't stay here - it's awful, it's smelly!
0:13:57 > 0:14:03The lovely lady could stay in my office, La Guardia, where it doesn't smell so bad.
0:14:03 > 0:14:07Bert Samuels, ma'am - lieutenant. Doris Rainey.
0:14:07 > 0:14:10You see, Paul. I'll be fine. Well...
0:14:10 > 0:14:13She'll be fine, and you guys can hit the bricks!
0:14:13 > 0:14:20Miss Rainey, was it? That's right. Please come this way - I've got some wonderful eggnog in my office.
0:14:22 > 0:14:24Forget it - you got a job to do!
0:14:33 > 0:14:39CHILD CRIES The Barbinskis moved out three months ago. Do you know where?
0:14:39 > 0:14:47Check the super. It's freezing. It's even colder inside - we've been without heat for eight days.
0:14:47 > 0:14:52We called the housing authority, even the police, but no-one does anything.
0:14:52 > 0:14:58The super won't talk to the service man? What can I do? Does he live here? Yes. Plenty.
0:14:58 > 0:15:05Come on, we'll wish him a merry Christmas. You want to look after the kid? Um... Um... OK.
0:15:05 > 0:15:09CRYING CONTINUES Show me those apartments.
0:15:09 > 0:15:12Have a good time. All right.
0:15:12 > 0:15:15Hey! CRYING STOPS
0:15:15 > 0:15:19SHE HUMS "Merrily We Roll Along"
0:15:23 > 0:15:28WHISTLE BLOWS Hold it there, buddy! OK, folks, move it along!
0:15:44 > 0:15:49How you doing? Pretty cold night to be pulling traffic duty.
0:15:49 > 0:15:53Who are you? Yabanowski. 14 Precinct.
0:15:53 > 0:15:57HORNS BLARE Let me dig out some ID for you.
0:15:57 > 0:16:02Just take a second. You know, every year, I gotta wear this stuff.
0:16:02 > 0:16:06HORNS BLASTING What is it? Give me a break, please!
0:16:06 > 0:16:12See I visit all the hospitals - children's wards. You got kids?
0:16:12 > 0:16:17Two. No kidding - me too. I hit the hospitals every year.
0:16:17 > 0:16:21It really makes me thank God my kids are healthy.
0:16:21 > 0:16:26BEEPING CONTINUES Oh, jeez - it ain't in that pocket.
0:16:26 > 0:16:32Maybe if I got out, it'd be easier. Forget it - the road's got to roll.
0:16:32 > 0:16:35No, I know I got some ID here some place.
0:16:35 > 0:16:42You want to see my kids? I'm sure they're terrific. Just keep rolling - I'm gonna get lynched.
0:16:42 > 0:16:48You want me to come over to your house as Santa later? Give me a break. No problem.
0:16:48 > 0:16:52I'll see you next year. Merry Christmas.
0:16:54 > 0:16:56Merry Christmas(!)
0:16:56 > 0:17:01Well, it's about time! All right, folks, move it along - let's go!
0:17:01 > 0:17:04All right, 29th and...
0:17:04 > 0:17:08That's the third phone call he's had since we've been here!
0:17:08 > 0:17:13What do you say? Help us out - we'd like to get out of here.
0:17:13 > 0:17:18What? If he's not done in 30 seconds, I'll pull him off! Got it.
0:17:18 > 0:17:20Righto,
0:17:20 > 0:17:24busted axle on 29th and 5th - bring a sling.
0:17:24 > 0:17:29Uh, Christmas and New Year are my best times of the year. I clean up.
0:17:29 > 0:17:36Finish telling us about Santa Claus. PHONE RINGS Right back. We're closed.
0:17:36 > 0:17:43Hey, hey! Is he crazy? Lighten up. I've had it with this waiting around. Take it easy. I've had it!
0:17:43 > 0:17:48Amazing what love will do to a man. It's my busiest time of the year.
0:17:48 > 0:17:52Tell us about the Santa Claus and we'll go. Jeez!
0:17:54 > 0:17:58Says he's trying to get to St Vincent and his car's stalling.
0:17:58 > 0:18:02He says it'd take forever for a police mechanic to come.
0:18:02 > 0:18:07It's Christmas. I'm a nice guy. Sure. That's all there was to it?
0:18:07 > 0:18:12You want some more? Just because he... You know who I'm talking about!
0:18:12 > 0:18:19Because he doesn't have a home to go to any more, he's trying to screw it up for the rest of us. Move it.
0:18:19 > 0:18:25Is that it? Yeah. Well, if that's it, that's it. We'll be in touch.
0:18:27 > 0:18:31PHONE RINGS Detectives. Petrie.
0:18:31 > 0:18:33Hi, honey.
0:18:33 > 0:18:36What happened?
0:18:36 > 0:18:40LACEY HUMS A CHRISTMAS CAROL '106075 respond.
0:18:40 > 0:18:45'Priority message for detectives car 12.' Did she say 12? Shh!
0:18:46 > 0:18:52'All other units, clear air, except for calls 1013 and 1030.'
0:18:52 > 0:18:57Central, this is detective car 12 responding. 'Go ahead, 14.'
0:18:57 > 0:19:01Chris, Petrie here. I think there's a problem with Claudia. Oh, Lord!
0:19:01 > 0:19:08What's wrong? 'If you take her to the hospital, I'll meet you there - it'll be faster.' Give me that.
0:19:08 > 0:19:15Is this labour or are you trying to save on a cab? Something's wrong. Has she talked to her doctor?
0:19:15 > 0:19:22Please just get her to the hospital - I don't know what's wrong! She's bleeding. We're on our way! Go!
0:19:23 > 0:19:30SIREN BLARES Stuff like this scares the hell out of me! She'll be fine.
0:19:30 > 0:19:32You're looking at a mother of two!
0:19:49 > 0:19:54There she is. Can we have some help here? Here's the man! Here we go.
0:19:54 > 0:20:01You look like a woman who's about to have a baby! Something isn't right, Mark - I'm still bleeding.
0:20:01 > 0:20:07Everything's gonna be fine. Mary Beth's had two babies. She knows! I know.
0:20:07 > 0:20:13Is Dr Polecic here? Yes, don't worry about a thing. WE are going to have this baby,
0:20:13 > 0:20:16and we are going to be a family...
0:20:17 > 0:20:20..everything is going to be OK!
0:20:21 > 0:20:23Can't wait to see you skinny again!
0:20:23 > 0:20:29I love you. Love you, too. Are you coming with me? What do you mean? Of course!
0:20:29 > 0:20:35Petrie, let us know right away. I'll come down as soon as we know.
0:20:36 > 0:20:39Hope it's a boy.
0:20:39 > 0:20:42What do you think? I'm not a doctor, Chris.
0:20:45 > 0:20:52There's no telling how long we'll have to wait, so I'm going to call the squad. OK.
0:20:52 > 0:20:56If you talk to what's-his-name, tell him "hi" for me.
0:20:56 > 0:20:58Got a dime?
0:21:04 > 0:21:06I'm lonely. Dory, I'm trying.
0:21:06 > 0:21:13Dinner's just going to be a little late. I want to taste your plum pudding. It tastes great.
0:21:13 > 0:21:16'Why don't I start...?' Without me?
0:21:16 > 0:21:19Well, just the prelims...
0:21:20 > 0:21:27I'll glaze the duck - that way, we can just slide it in the oven when you come through the door.
0:21:27 > 0:21:34I wanted us to cook together. 'You gotta work.' No, YOU'll end up doing the work! Are you gonna wait for me?
0:21:34 > 0:21:39I always do, don't I? Yeah. Yeah, you do.
0:21:41 > 0:21:43Mmm!
0:21:43 > 0:21:48This wine is terrific! Are you getting drunk?
0:21:48 > 0:21:49Hey!
0:21:49 > 0:21:52Oh... I'll call you later. Bye.
0:21:56 > 0:22:02Not much to say - they stopped the bleeding and put her on a foetal monitor.
0:22:02 > 0:22:05Wait and see, huh? Yeah.
0:22:05 > 0:22:12They're talking a Caesarean section - can you believe that? They do those all the time. I was Caesarean.
0:22:12 > 0:22:18Claudia and I took natural childbirth classes for ten weeks. It's crazy!
0:22:20 > 0:22:23Look, I've got to get back. Hey!
0:22:25 > 0:22:29Everything will be fine. You know that.
0:22:29 > 0:22:31Thanks.
0:22:37 > 0:22:44You OK? Christine, you mind if we made a stop before we go in the squad room? No.
0:22:47 > 0:22:51KNOCK AT DOOR Hey! Yo! Harvey! Mama, it's mama!
0:22:51 > 0:22:53OK, babe.
0:22:53 > 0:22:56Come on! All right, all right!
0:22:56 > 0:23:01Hi. Hi. We can stay one minute, OK? How you doing? Merry Christmas.
0:23:01 > 0:23:04Mom! Come here, come here!
0:23:04 > 0:23:11Isn't that great? Great! Yeah. We got you something good! I'll bet! I thought you were home for good.
0:23:11 > 0:23:16No, I... Give us a second, guys. Excuse me, guys.
0:23:17 > 0:23:19Well, guys - hi, how's it going?
0:23:19 > 0:23:24Great! Huh? Yeah. Ooh, pretty lights. Yeah, look what else we have here.
0:23:24 > 0:23:30HE KISSES HER Feel better? Yup.
0:23:30 > 0:23:36Yeah, I just, um, I got scared, that's all - with Claudia and all that bleeding, um...
0:23:36 > 0:23:43Now they're considering a C section and it made me want to come home and hug my babies.
0:23:43 > 0:23:45I'm glad you did.
0:23:45 > 0:23:48Gonna be OK? Mmm-hmm.
0:23:48 > 0:23:51Just hang on to me, huh?
0:23:54 > 0:23:57What? What?
0:23:57 > 0:23:59Oh!
0:24:01 > 0:24:07What? Hmm? What are you looking at me like that for?
0:24:07 > 0:24:09You wanna have another?
0:24:10 > 0:24:12Yeah.
0:24:20 > 0:24:23I gotta go back now.
0:24:29 > 0:24:31What? OK.
0:24:33 > 0:24:40What happened to the guys? They vanished into the other room. Maybe they heard Santa. Yeah. Hey!
0:24:40 > 0:24:45Hello. Here they are. Here they are! Hi. Hi. Merry Christmas!
0:24:47 > 0:24:50Oh, thank you.
0:24:50 > 0:24:53Oh, isn't that nice? LAUGHTER
0:24:53 > 0:24:59Thank you. Can I open it right now? You gotta open it right now! Yeah!
0:24:59 > 0:25:01Thanks. Harvey says you're pretty.
0:25:03 > 0:25:06Hey! No hitting on Christmas Eve!
0:25:08 > 0:25:11OK. I love presents!
0:25:11 > 0:25:14Faster, faster! OK.
0:25:14 > 0:25:16My favourite colour!
0:25:16 > 0:25:19What luck, huh? Look, a hat! Huh?
0:25:19 > 0:25:21Mittens!
0:25:21 > 0:25:24Oh, and a muffler!
0:25:24 > 0:25:27Thanks, you guys!
0:25:27 > 0:25:32You're so good to me. OK, enough kissing now - we gotta go! OK!
0:25:32 > 0:25:34Your mother is so mean to me!
0:25:36 > 0:25:43Thank you. When it gets to be ten o'clock, go ahead and trim the tree and surprise me. I promise.
0:25:45 > 0:25:52Is my present as good as hers? Merry Christmas, everyone. Goodbye, guys. Thank you. Goodbye. Goodbye.
0:25:53 > 0:25:57You talk to Petrie, give him my best. I will. OK.
0:25:58 > 0:26:00Bye, guys. Goodbye. Bye.
0:26:04 > 0:26:08Let's finish wrapping the presents. OK.
0:26:18 > 0:26:20Hey, you guys.
0:26:20 > 0:26:23What's the matter, Dad?
0:26:25 > 0:26:27Come here.
0:26:34 > 0:26:39You won't find a cheaper price or a better tree. It's too much.
0:26:39 > 0:26:44You want blood? I'm practically giving you the tree! Let's go.
0:26:44 > 0:26:48Merry Christmas, creep! A reasonable price would do.
0:26:48 > 0:26:51Myer! Come here, come here!
0:26:56 > 0:27:01It's me - Ralph. Hey, Ralphie, what you hiding for?
0:27:01 > 0:27:05I'm making sure your mother ain't around!
0:27:05 > 0:27:08Um, Myer, I need a favour.
0:27:08 > 0:27:12What's that? It's $142 and 55 cents.
0:27:12 > 0:27:19I've been cracking parking meters. I don't know - all these coins. Come on, I'm in the straits here.
0:27:19 > 0:27:21What do you say I give you a break?
0:27:21 > 0:27:26Two for three? How much is that? 85 bucks.
0:27:27 > 0:27:30Oh, Jeez! Um...
0:27:30 > 0:27:32OK!
0:27:32 > 0:27:39Ralphie, I'm giving you a good deal, I'm telling you. Where am I going to move coins on Christmas Eve? I know.
0:27:39 > 0:27:46You're the greatest, you know. So how's it been going? You moving any trees? Oh, not bad, not bad.
0:27:46 > 0:27:50Thanks a lot. I won't forget this. Take it easy.
0:27:50 > 0:27:55You want trees? I got trees - take advantage of me!
0:27:56 > 0:28:00Merry Christmas, Myer. See you around.
0:28:00 > 0:28:04That was Santa Claus! Hey, Ralphie. Is that a cop?
0:28:04 > 0:28:11Hey, look, it's, um, Christmas Eve - why don't I just give you a tree... for cost?
0:28:11 > 0:28:13I'll be right back.
0:28:13 > 0:28:19Phil. Hello, Bert. This is Miss Rainey. This is Lt Malik.
0:28:19 > 0:28:24He's the Bureau Internal Affairs liaison officer. Impressive title.
0:28:24 > 0:28:31I didn't realise the police had so many handsome men. Thank you. Would you excuse us for one moment? Sure.
0:28:31 > 0:28:33Police business.
0:28:35 > 0:28:42I was real damn disappointed to hear about that prisoner foul-up, Bert. We'll get him. Yeah, I hope so.
0:28:42 > 0:28:47The same thing happened to a captain in Queens about a year ago and...
0:28:47 > 0:28:55Well, my boys - we caught the case eventually, but that captain's commanding a vacant lot squad now.
0:28:56 > 0:28:58Thanks for telling me, Phil. Yeah.
0:29:00 > 0:29:05I'm sorry, would you excuse us? Police business. Nice to meet you.
0:29:11 > 0:29:18It's time for me to go and say hello to the uniforms. I hope we meet again. Me, too. Goodbye. Goodbye.
0:29:18 > 0:29:21Thank you, Bert. I'll be back.
0:29:21 > 0:29:24PHONE RINGS
0:29:24 > 0:29:26Merry Christmas!
0:29:26 > 0:29:29Detectives. La Guardia.
0:29:37 > 0:29:40What did you say your name was?
0:29:40 > 0:29:42Kline.
0:29:43 > 0:29:44OK.
0:29:44 > 0:29:47The wallet - it's here! Yes, sir.
0:29:47 > 0:29:54That creep from IAD shows up and so does the wallet! OK, we'll send someone over.
0:29:54 > 0:29:56The wallet's over there!
0:29:56 > 0:30:03A guy who owns a Christmas tree stand just phoned in about Santa driving a radio car. My twins await!
0:30:03 > 0:30:08Hold it! Call Cagney and Lacey - they're already out there.
0:30:08 > 0:30:11I'll see if Doris needs anything.
0:30:15 > 0:30:20How do you know it's Barbinski? I used to see him around the pool hall.
0:30:20 > 0:30:24He's a little, you know... Couple of quarts low? Right.
0:30:24 > 0:30:27Hey, hey, hey, beat it!
0:30:27 > 0:30:29You said something about coins.
0:30:29 > 0:30:35What coins? Could you just tell us where we could find Ralph?
0:30:35 > 0:30:39Beats me! I just don't want to get arrested!
0:30:39 > 0:30:44No-one's going to arrest you, sir. Can you help us locate Mr Barbinski?
0:30:44 > 0:30:51I don't know where he lives. I used to know his number, but he's disconnected. Where does he work?
0:30:51 > 0:30:59He used to be a mechanic, but... Oh, he's working now as a Santa Claus - that's why he's wearing the suit.
0:30:59 > 0:31:05For a department store? No, one of them places that rents out Santas to parties.
0:31:06 > 0:31:08Thank you.
0:31:13 > 0:31:19We all want to help, but it doesn't take all of us to find someone cracking parking meters.
0:31:19 > 0:31:26Isbecki's right. Even he could do this single-handedly. I got a flight to catch - my twins await!
0:31:26 > 0:31:30I don't want to hear about twins. That's disgusting!
0:31:30 > 0:31:34What's the proposal? I say we draw straws.
0:31:34 > 0:31:40The loser follows up on Barbinski. The rest of us can lead a normal life. Huh?
0:31:40 > 0:31:43We just have to convince Samuels.
0:31:44 > 0:31:47I'll risk it.
0:31:56 > 0:32:01The batteries are already in and you just hold it here and press there.
0:32:07 > 0:32:09How about that, huh?
0:32:20 > 0:32:24Oh! CRASH!
0:32:26 > 0:32:28You OK? Yeah.
0:32:34 > 0:32:39You got nothing better to do? Find Barbinski!
0:32:55 > 0:33:00Can you believe this? Is that the wallet?
0:33:00 > 0:33:04How much money is in it? About $200. SHE WHISTLES
0:33:04 > 0:33:09That creep in Samuels' office brought it. Malik.
0:33:09 > 0:33:16Know what I'm going to do? Haven't a clue. Hand this in to Samuels, right under that jerk's nose.
0:33:16 > 0:33:19Hey! You're all man, Isbecki!
0:33:19 > 0:33:21Hold it down a second! Go ahead.
0:33:25 > 0:33:33What did they say was wrong? Placenta previa. There's no way for the baby to get out normally.
0:33:33 > 0:33:38Don't worry. Harv's sister had all three of her children Caesarean.
0:33:38 > 0:33:41I can be in the room with her - that'll help.
0:33:41 > 0:33:44Marcus, don't worry, huh? Yeah.
0:33:44 > 0:33:48I wanted to deliver that baby with my own hands.
0:33:51 > 0:33:56Mary Beth, I just want Claudia and the baby to be all right.
0:33:56 > 0:34:04Listen, do you want someone to come down there and be with you? No, I'm with Claudia - that's enough.
0:34:04 > 0:34:10You tell her for me, stay strong and we're all thinking about you here,
0:34:10 > 0:34:14and, um, let us know right away. OK. Right away.
0:34:15 > 0:34:17Bad?
0:34:19 > 0:34:21I like that man a lot.
0:34:21 > 0:34:28This is the guy we're looking for. He's employed as a Santa Claus. Yeah. You know him? Ralph Barbinski.
0:34:28 > 0:34:33You ain't telling me Ralph's in trouble? We can't talk about that.
0:34:33 > 0:34:38I love Ralph. He's one of my favourite employees.
0:34:40 > 0:34:42Max, you wanna break the bums up?
0:34:44 > 0:34:46No way, Jose!
0:34:46 > 0:34:49Hey! Hey, Max! Leave me alone!
0:34:50 > 0:34:53Christmas is a filthy business!
0:34:53 > 0:34:57He's good with kids - helluva nice guy. Max?
0:34:57 > 0:35:02No, Ralphie. It's just... I don't know, he's, um...
0:35:02 > 0:35:08He's not retarded, I don't think. We get the picture. Do you have his address?
0:35:08 > 0:35:15You sure you want this guy? We're sure. I'll call Cagney and Lacey and tell them to meet us there.
0:35:16 > 0:35:19Mark? Yes.
0:35:19 > 0:35:23You love me, don't you? You know I love you, Claudia.
0:35:23 > 0:35:28I love you more than anything. I'm sorry I messed things up.
0:35:28 > 0:35:32That's crazy! It was supposed to be so nice!
0:35:32 > 0:35:35God, I hope the baby's all right!
0:35:35 > 0:35:42You and the baby are going to be fine. You're going to be strong and healthy and alive, hear me? Uh-huh.
0:35:43 > 0:35:48I'm so glad you're with me, baby! You're going to be fine.
0:35:54 > 0:35:56Wait your turn!
0:35:58 > 0:36:02Thank you. Here we are - hot tea and honey.
0:36:02 > 0:36:04Thank you. Thank you.
0:36:04 > 0:36:09The children should play next door. So they can break something? Hush!
0:36:09 > 0:36:16We have nothing to hide in this family - not a thing. Do you children love your daddy?
0:36:16 > 0:36:19He's a no-good... Hush! Old fool!
0:36:19 > 0:36:24It'd be better if we got back to what you were talking about before.
0:36:24 > 0:36:30Papa never did like Ralph. No kidding! Thinks he's no account, but that's not true.
0:36:30 > 0:36:36- Ha! I'm supporting the lot of 'em! - He couldn't help losing his job.
0:36:36 > 0:36:43An engine block fell on him - hurt his back. We didn't have insurance and the job didn't pay benefits.
0:36:43 > 0:36:48- Ralph can't lift things any more. - He can lift a fork! Let her finish.
0:36:48 > 0:36:54Do you know where he might be now? Are you going to arrest our daddy?
0:36:55 > 0:36:58He was working as a Santa Claus.
0:36:58 > 0:37:04His friend offered him a share of a miniature golf course in Florida if we could get there.
0:37:04 > 0:37:07He took a Santa job for ticket money.
0:37:07 > 0:37:12He has been making money, but not as a Santa. This is a helluva thing!
0:37:12 > 0:37:17Trixie! Seven years and she finally sees it! You have any i...?
0:37:17 > 0:37:19Santa Claus!
0:37:19 > 0:37:23That's not Santa Claus, stupid - that's Daddy!
0:37:25 > 0:37:27Hello, Ralph. Police, Ralph.
0:37:27 > 0:37:29FREEZE!
0:37:29 > 0:37:33- Ralph! Don't you hurt him! - I'll call for backup.
0:37:34 > 0:37:39We just want to talk to you! Go back into your room!
0:37:39 > 0:37:42ALL SHOUTING AT ONCE
0:37:45 > 0:37:49They're chasing Santa Claus! DADDY! DADDY!
0:37:49 > 0:37:51GIRL: You'll never catch Santa Claus!
0:37:55 > 0:37:58COMMOTION CONTINUES
0:38:09 > 0:38:13Look, it's starting to snow! Uh-huh. Hey, Ralph!
0:38:16 > 0:38:18Ralph! Give us a break, huh?
0:38:18 > 0:38:20He came up the fire escape.
0:38:20 > 0:38:23It's bizarre - it isn't even cold!
0:38:23 > 0:38:29They're gonna shoot Santa Claus! Nobody is going to shoot anybody.
0:38:29 > 0:38:32Would you put that thing away? We're the police!
0:38:32 > 0:38:37It's all right. We're after an escaped felon. My daddy!
0:38:37 > 0:38:40Santa Claus! Ho, ho, ho!
0:38:42 > 0:38:48That's not Santa Claus - that's Daddy. OK, Santa, come down before you hurt yourself.
0:38:48 > 0:38:51I can't.
0:38:51 > 0:38:55I can't. Oh...
0:38:55 > 0:39:02I did wrong. I got nothing to say for myself and I'm ready to pay the price - even if it is Christmas.
0:39:02 > 0:39:07You should've thought of that before. I'm ready to pay the price,
0:39:07 > 0:39:12even if I do have a wife and kids waiting. Can you believe this guy?
0:39:12 > 0:39:17Maybe we can work something out here, Bert. Bert?! Lieutenant.
0:39:17 > 0:39:22It's not unusual, in special cases, to issue a desk appearance ticket,
0:39:22 > 0:39:27if you think the accused will appear in court. You'd appear? You bet!
0:39:27 > 0:39:32Wait a minute! We're not talking misdemeanours here -
0:39:32 > 0:39:37felonies, larceny, escaping arrest, stealing a police vehicle.
0:39:37 > 0:39:41I didn't steal that police car - I just used it.
0:39:41 > 0:39:46Hear this? The guy's crazy. Probably can't even take care of himself.
0:39:46 > 0:39:51I brought it back. It's out there now. Come on!
0:39:51 > 0:39:53He's right - he showed us the car.
0:39:53 > 0:39:59Come on! You ought to see what this guy's putting up with at home.
0:40:00 > 0:40:06Seven years you were straight and you had to throw it away for miniature golf in Florida!
0:40:06 > 0:40:11Well, a man's got to work - a man can't sponge of his in-laws.
0:40:11 > 0:40:18If I was a smart attorney, I'd point out that you didn't know he wasn't going to give that money to charity.
0:40:19 > 0:40:24You're not that smart. Sir. The same attorney... Don't press your luck!
0:40:28 > 0:40:33Give him a DAT and let him go. Sir. What about my ticket money? What?
0:40:33 > 0:40:38Trying to get that money was the whole reason I went back into crime.
0:40:38 > 0:40:45I told you - this guy's crazy. Ralph, you got that money breaking into parking meters -
0:40:45 > 0:40:47we can't give it back.
0:40:47 > 0:40:50There goes our dream, Ralphie.
0:40:50 > 0:40:55They're both crazy! I bet they need constant supervision. Lieutenant...
0:40:56 > 0:40:59What? What happened to the wallet?
0:40:59 > 0:41:06I shoved it off on that creep Malik, so he could bring it back to all those rats in Internal Affairs. Why?
0:41:07 > 0:41:10Merry Christmas - great job.
0:41:10 > 0:41:14Merry Christmas, boys! ALL: Merry Christmas!
0:41:16 > 0:41:19Sorry. It's OK. Lieutenant Malik?
0:41:19 > 0:41:25Yes, yes. We don't know each other, but I'm Detective Cagney. Nice to meet you. Hello.
0:41:25 > 0:41:30I didn't want you to get away before I wished you merry Christmas. Well.
0:41:31 > 0:41:39What was that for? I just wanted to give you something. You and all the guys at Internal Affairs. Thank you.
0:41:39 > 0:41:46Merry Christmas to you, too. Detective Cagney? Cagney. Nice to meet you. Thank you. Pleasure.
0:41:46 > 0:41:48Bye. Bye.
0:41:48 > 0:41:50Excuse me.
0:41:56 > 0:42:03You sure it wasn't HIS wallet? First bump, I got the wallet. Second bump, I put it back, except for the money.
0:42:03 > 0:42:08You're off the hook - we'll square it for you. Merry Christmas, Willie.
0:42:08 > 0:42:15Merry Christmas. Stay out of trouble! I gave you my word, didn't I? Yeah. Merry Christmas, Willie.
0:42:17 > 0:42:19Merry Christmas.
0:42:26 > 0:42:29Ticket money.
0:42:29 > 0:42:33Oh, no, we can't take charity. Ralph.
0:42:35 > 0:42:39You want to go on living with Mom and Papa?
0:42:39 > 0:42:46I'll pay you back as soon as I can. Whenever. Just take your family, take the money - go to Florida!
0:42:46 > 0:42:50And come back for the court appearance. Merry Christmas!
0:42:50 > 0:42:56You won't have to do time. There's enough people rooting for you. Merry Christmas. Mmm-hmm.
0:42:58 > 0:43:01Yeah, well, thanks a lot,
0:43:01 > 0:43:03and...
0:43:03 > 0:43:08I hope you get something nice for Christmas - all of you.
0:43:08 > 0:43:10Merry Christmas!
0:43:13 > 0:43:15Ho, ho, ho!
0:43:24 > 0:43:30It is 10.05. Dory shouldn't be too drunk...at least for dinner -
0:43:30 > 0:43:34that is, if we're free to go! What? You're free!
0:43:34 > 0:43:38Thank the good Lord. We missed Handel's Messiah.
0:43:38 > 0:43:43The night is young, Doris, and we have each other.
0:43:48 > 0:43:5411.20 flight. I could pick up the twins at... Will you stop? You know how I feel about that.
0:43:54 > 0:43:57Victor, I need to talk with you!
0:44:03 > 0:44:10My mother! I'll just stay here out of the way until you're finished, and then we'll go to the airport.
0:44:11 > 0:44:14Your mother?!
0:44:14 > 0:44:15Oh, Victor!
0:44:15 > 0:44:18Oh!
0:44:18 > 0:44:21Victor! Oh, Victor!
0:44:29 > 0:44:31Hi, Ma.
0:44:37 > 0:44:42Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas - stay warm. Merry Christmas.
0:44:42 > 0:44:50Hey, I know everybody wants to go home, but I've got half a jug of eggnog. It's pretty good.
0:44:55 > 0:44:59Well, sir, I think we have some cups over here.
0:45:00 > 0:45:03Got any nutmeg?
0:45:07 > 0:45:11PHONE RINGS ANSWERPHONE: 'Detectives. Samuels.'
0:45:11 > 0:45:15PETRIE: 'It's a girl!' SAMUELS: It's a girl!
0:45:15 > 0:45:18Yeah! All right, Petrie! Yes!
0:45:46 > 0:45:49Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:46:04 > 0:46:07TENOR SINGS ROUSING ITALIAN SONG