Not in Holby Anymore

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0:00:02 > 0:00:03The ED is having a mystery inspection.

0:00:03 > 0:00:06- If there's anything I can do to help...- You're already helping.

0:00:06 > 0:00:08I don't want to spend any more years apart.

0:00:08 > 0:00:11Engage your brain! There is one in there somewhere.

0:00:11 > 0:00:13I'm really not sure I'm cut out for this online dating.

0:00:13 > 0:00:15You're not. It's for losers and weirdos.

0:00:15 > 0:00:17You needn't look so smug. You were wrong,

0:00:17 > 0:00:19and so were you, for not letting me know when you thought

0:00:19 > 0:00:21a patient's life was at risk.

0:00:21 > 0:00:22Oi, rent-a-gob! You could have told

0:00:22 > 0:00:25me about the complaint before you started mouthing off!

0:00:25 > 0:00:27- I'm the Trust's inspector. - You?

0:00:27 > 0:00:28Mr Grayling, I, erm...

0:00:28 > 0:00:31You'll have my report by the end of the week.

0:00:34 > 0:00:37It's easy just to tell people what their faults are.

0:00:37 > 0:00:40Especially from a distance. You know, like, erm...

0:00:40 > 0:00:42You - you need to be braver.

0:00:42 > 0:00:44You - you need to be kinder.

0:00:45 > 0:00:49You need to grow a little common sense.

0:00:51 > 0:00:53But, if you really want to help people...

0:01:32 > 0:01:34It's a very good likeness. Well done.

0:01:36 > 0:01:37Come on, then.

0:01:37 > 0:01:41Fine. Snog Louise, marry Ethan and...

0:01:41 > 0:01:42Less chat, guys.

0:01:42 > 0:01:44We're busy, if you hadn't noticed.

0:01:44 > 0:01:47..avoid Jacob. Did we just get told off?

0:01:49 > 0:01:52Last week's report. Wasn't exactly glowing.

0:01:52 > 0:01:55Oi! Talk to me like that again, I will kick you out myself!

0:01:55 > 0:01:57- Louise! - Sorry.

0:01:57 > 0:02:00Now just calm down. Just calm... Calm down.

0:02:00 > 0:02:03Lads! Lads, lads, lads!

0:02:03 > 0:02:06If you want to play fight club, we can have it round the back in ten.

0:02:06 > 0:02:09Oh, make it stop, Charlie. It's not even nine o'clock.

0:02:09 > 0:02:13But in here, you shut up, sit down, and behave.

0:02:13 > 0:02:14Yeah, whatever. Come on...

0:02:18 > 0:02:20Ever heard of backup?

0:02:43 > 0:02:44Can I help you with something?

0:02:44 > 0:02:46I've read the report.

0:02:47 > 0:02:50It's not just a slight on you, it's a slight on all of us,

0:02:50 > 0:02:53so maybe you shouldn't take it so personally.

0:02:53 > 0:02:55Good. Cos I'm not.

0:02:55 > 0:02:57Try telling the mug that.

0:03:00 > 0:03:02Dropping a ton of grief on people's heads

0:03:02 > 0:03:04is not going to make them work better.

0:03:04 > 0:03:05You want a bet?

0:03:07 > 0:03:10Yeah, actually, I do.

0:03:10 > 0:03:12So? Has anyone got anything to say?

0:03:12 > 0:03:16Yeah - no offence, Jacob, but do you really need me for this?

0:03:16 > 0:03:19Lack of communication between reception and nursing staff

0:03:19 > 0:03:21was an area deemed as "needing improvement",

0:03:21 > 0:03:23so, yes, Noel, your presence is greatly required.

0:03:23 > 0:03:25LOUISE GIGGLES

0:03:25 > 0:03:28You were mentioned by name, actually, Lou.

0:03:28 > 0:03:30For demonstrating an almost total lack of compassion

0:03:30 > 0:03:32and bedside manner.

0:03:32 > 0:03:33Give me that.

0:03:33 > 0:03:37I think what Jacob is trying to say is that although the report

0:03:37 > 0:03:41looks bad, it's an unfair representation.

0:03:41 > 0:03:43We all know that we're capable of better.

0:03:43 > 0:03:46No, I mean you guys let me down. Big time.

0:03:46 > 0:03:48Can I just get back to work?

0:03:48 > 0:03:51I'm meant to be reading a patient a bedtime story.

0:03:51 > 0:03:53Well, thanks to your poor performance, the trust now want us

0:03:53 > 0:03:55to try out a new team-building exercise.

0:03:55 > 0:03:57Oh, joy of joys(!)

0:03:57 > 0:03:59So, starting tonight,

0:03:59 > 0:04:03we have to identify our individual weaknesses, work up a plan to

0:04:03 > 0:04:07deal with them, and implement that with the help of our colleagues.

0:04:07 > 0:04:11We're not some suits on an awayday, Charlie. We're nurses.

0:04:11 > 0:04:13- I'm not doing it. - I think I'm pretty busy.

0:04:13 > 0:04:16Who wants to identify their personal weakness?

0:04:19 > 0:04:21Good, because we've done it for you.

0:04:22 > 0:04:25Louise, be nice.

0:04:25 > 0:04:27NOEL CHUCKLES

0:04:27 > 0:04:30Noel, engage your brain.

0:04:30 > 0:04:32BOTH LAUGH

0:04:32 > 0:04:35David. Grow a pair.

0:04:35 > 0:04:36LAUGHTER

0:04:36 > 0:04:40The Tin Woman, Scarecrow, and the Lion, you could say.

0:04:40 > 0:04:41You could say.

0:04:41 > 0:04:45Why are you even listening to doctor-what's-his-name, anyway?

0:04:45 > 0:04:46The man fancies Lily.

0:04:46 > 0:04:48Just get on with it, face-ache.

0:04:48 > 0:04:51We'll reconvene in the morning, at the end of shift.

0:04:51 > 0:04:54Now, let's get back to work. David?

0:04:57 > 0:04:58You all set?

0:04:58 > 0:05:01Yes. Can you remind me why I'm doing this?

0:05:01 > 0:05:03Well, see it as a lesson in assertiveness.

0:05:03 > 0:05:06Ah, assertiveness. Can't I do that here?

0:05:06 > 0:05:08Would an assertive person ask me that?

0:05:08 > 0:05:10You're being picked up in ten.

0:05:10 > 0:05:13You been on the rob again?

0:05:13 > 0:05:15Nah, not today. It's Alicia's.

0:05:15 > 0:05:16So you have been, then.

0:05:16 > 0:05:19Behave, will you? I'm looking after it.

0:05:19 > 0:05:20Braver man than me.

0:05:24 > 0:05:26Look at the state of these!

0:05:26 > 0:05:28What do you reckon, Dave?

0:05:29 > 0:05:31Ah, you'll be fine, mate.

0:05:31 > 0:05:35There'll be a few people scrapping, maybe the odd spiking,

0:05:35 > 0:05:38a few lightweights who can't handle their beer and guaranteed to

0:05:38 > 0:05:42get some moron sticking a camera in your face.

0:05:42 > 0:05:45Just keep an eye on your wallet, and whatever you do, don't...

0:05:45 > 0:05:47Come on. Club's this way.

0:05:53 > 0:05:56Come on, Sheriff.

0:05:56 > 0:05:57My hat!

0:06:02 > 0:06:04I told you. Stay away.

0:06:05 > 0:06:09- Your brother invited me. - Didn't you get the memo?

0:06:09 > 0:06:11He might not have wised up yet, but he will.

0:06:11 > 0:06:14And don't forget, I know you, Dan.

0:06:14 > 0:06:17Oh, change the record, mate.

0:06:17 > 0:06:21Change the record? Wipe your nose, pal.

0:06:21 > 0:06:23Leave him. He's not worth it. Come on.

0:06:30 > 0:06:33First time we've been kicked out before we've even got in.

0:06:33 > 0:06:35It's not my fault.

0:06:35 > 0:06:37You rubbed the bouncer's head!

0:06:37 > 0:06:38It was just so shiny, man!

0:06:39 > 0:06:42I didn't come all this way to sit and play Call Of Duty, you know.

0:06:42 > 0:06:44Get me in the club.

0:06:48 > 0:06:50I thought we were getting on it.

0:06:50 > 0:06:53Au contraire, mon frere. On it indeed we are getting.

0:07:06 > 0:07:08I like what you're saying.

0:07:28 > 0:07:29Stu! Stu! Come here!

0:07:33 > 0:07:34Kyle is going to kill you.

0:07:34 > 0:07:36Spent years planning this, me and your brother.

0:07:36 > 0:07:39He wanted you to get so smashed.

0:07:40 > 0:07:42I've got more. Colombia's finest.

0:07:42 > 0:07:47Ha-ha! Oh, hello, Refusie-Susie, I didn't know you were coming tonight.

0:07:47 > 0:07:49Oh, shut up.

0:07:49 > 0:07:51Look, I know why you're doing this.

0:07:51 > 0:07:53You want to get at Kyle. I'm not stupid.

0:07:53 > 0:07:55Behave. I'm here cos I want to be.

0:07:56 > 0:07:59Sure?

0:07:59 > 0:08:01Oh, it's your flipping birthday.

0:08:02 > 0:08:04You won't say anything?

0:08:04 > 0:08:06What your brother don't know, can't hurt me.

0:08:09 > 0:08:10Ha-ha!

0:08:10 > 0:08:13Still don't see what was wrong with the old system.

0:08:13 > 0:08:15If nothing changes, nothing changes.

0:08:15 > 0:08:17THIS is a great piece of kit.

0:08:17 > 0:08:19Sort of reminds me of Star Wars.

0:08:19 > 0:08:21How is this anything like Star Wars?

0:08:22 > 0:08:25These are not the attitudes we are looking for.

0:08:26 > 0:08:29Majority of check-ins tonight need to be processed this way.

0:08:31 > 0:08:32Trust's orders.

0:08:32 > 0:08:34Yeah, but it's Saturday night, Dr Gardner!

0:08:34 > 0:08:35Thank you, Noel.

0:08:37 > 0:08:39- Noel. - Ah.

0:08:39 > 0:08:41Thank you, sir.

0:08:43 > 0:08:44Ahem!

0:08:44 > 0:08:46- One second. - Can I have a word with you, please?

0:08:46 > 0:08:47Sure.

0:08:47 > 0:08:49I've just had my mother on the phone.

0:08:49 > 0:08:50How is she?

0:08:50 > 0:08:53Oh, thrilled at the news that she's going to be a grandma.

0:08:53 > 0:08:55Aw! You guys! Congratulations.

0:08:55 > 0:08:56What?

0:08:56 > 0:09:00Relax. Max and Jez stole my tablet, and hacked my account.

0:09:00 > 0:09:03My mam now thinks I'm a pregnant white supremacist.

0:09:03 > 0:09:06Look at my profile. Twelve-week scan!

0:09:06 > 0:09:09- Give it back! - Jez has got it. For safekeeping.

0:09:09 > 0:09:11Also for live updates throughout the night.

0:09:11 > 0:09:12I'm going to murder you.

0:09:14 > 0:09:15Unbelievable!

0:09:15 > 0:09:18Her ankle got a lot better as soon as her song came on.

0:09:18 > 0:09:20All right, let's find Iain,

0:09:20 > 0:09:22call control, and tell them we're all clear.

0:09:22 > 0:09:24Dave the rave!

0:09:26 > 0:09:28Long time, man!

0:09:28 > 0:09:29You know him?

0:09:30 > 0:09:33Forgot how bad the clubs are round here, man.

0:09:33 > 0:09:35In Manchester, yeah, there's a...

0:09:35 > 0:09:36Blah, blah, blah, in Manchester...

0:09:36 > 0:09:39In Manchester, you ain't got me, have ya?

0:09:40 > 0:09:41That's true.

0:09:41 > 0:09:43Yeah? Cheers.

0:09:50 > 0:09:51I've missed you.

0:09:54 > 0:09:57You could, you know, call more.

0:09:57 > 0:09:59Your phone's for more than just watching porn, you know.

0:09:59 > 0:10:02Listen, I'm a man of mystery, innit?

0:10:02 > 0:10:05They seek him here, they seek him there.

0:10:05 > 0:10:09What you doing? Put the drink down! Move, man!

0:10:09 > 0:10:10- Move! - Idiot.

0:10:14 > 0:10:16Rar! Proper full-on Hulk tonight, innit?

0:10:18 > 0:10:21Contamination! It might be contaminated.

0:10:22 > 0:10:23Next round's on you, then.

0:10:25 > 0:10:28Ah. Had any nibbles, Nibbles?

0:10:28 > 0:10:30Yeah. Lots.

0:10:31 > 0:10:35I'm not sure this is really my thing, to be honest.

0:10:35 > 0:10:36- Come on, let's have a look. - No, I...

0:10:36 > 0:10:40Don't worry, I'm not going to look at your photos.

0:10:40 > 0:10:41There's nothing here...

0:10:41 > 0:10:43Yeah, I'm... I'm waiting for the right girl.

0:10:43 > 0:10:46Come on. There's loads of talent on here.

0:10:46 > 0:10:50Oh, look, there's the fit F1 on Keller.

0:10:50 > 0:10:52- Yeah? - Yeah.

0:10:54 > 0:10:56Oh, hang on, I've had her.

0:10:56 > 0:10:59Unfortunately, there isn't a filter for

0:10:59 > 0:11:00"girls my brother has slept with".

0:11:00 > 0:11:02- Hmm. - What are you doing?

0:11:02 > 0:11:05I'm just making a few edits to your "about me" bit.

0:11:05 > 0:11:08- No...- No, look, trust me on this one, bro, OK?

0:11:08 > 0:11:12Give it an hour, or two, and they'll be...

0:11:12 > 0:11:15- "Ethan" out of the palm of your hand.- Ugh.

0:11:18 > 0:11:20OK.

0:11:20 > 0:11:21Right, I'll hang on to this.

0:11:21 > 0:11:23No, that's...

0:11:29 > 0:11:30Nee-naw, nee-naw, fun police have arrived.

0:11:30 > 0:11:33- What have you given him? - Nothing you haven't had before.

0:11:33 > 0:11:34Yeah, well, some of us grew up.

0:11:34 > 0:11:36Bet it's lonely up there on that high horse.

0:11:36 > 0:11:38- Are you jealous? - Of what?

0:11:38 > 0:11:41Some crappy 9-5 and a girlfriend who uploads a picture

0:11:41 > 0:11:43of every meal she cooks you for dinner?

0:11:43 > 0:11:47Do me a favour. Got plenty to keep me occupied.

0:11:47 > 0:11:50Anyone. You can have absolutely anyone.

0:11:50 > 0:11:53Can't help who you fall for.

0:11:53 > 0:11:55He could actually go places, Dan.

0:11:55 > 0:11:57I'm not going to let you cock that up for him.

0:11:57 > 0:11:59What I don't know, can't hurt you.

0:12:19 > 0:12:21ALARM WAILS

0:12:21 > 0:12:24Fire! Actual fire in the smoking area!

0:12:24 > 0:12:27OK, ladies and gents, out the door, please! Come on!

0:12:27 > 0:12:30Thank you very much! Nice and calmly.

0:12:30 > 0:12:32This way, please, ladies and gents. Come along.

0:12:32 > 0:12:35Right, here we go. Finally, something to do.

0:12:35 > 0:12:383-0-0-6 to control, responding to a running call, over...

0:12:38 > 0:12:41- Hang on! Hang... - Come on, Dave!

0:12:41 > 0:12:43But we were leaving!

0:12:43 > 0:12:45Come on, guys. Keep it moving.

0:13:06 > 0:13:09Move over, guys. Let me have a look.

0:13:10 > 0:13:12Ah!

0:13:22 > 0:13:24YELLS FROM CROWD

0:13:24 > 0:13:26- Where's my brother? - He's at the front.

0:13:34 > 0:13:36All right, David, see if you can see outside.

0:13:36 > 0:13:37We'll try and stop the ones at the back.

0:13:37 > 0:13:413-0-0-6 to control, I need back up at The Crypt Nightclub.

0:13:41 > 0:13:43Three ambulances.

0:13:46 > 0:13:50Boys! Boys! We've got a problem at the back!

0:13:50 > 0:13:53Guys! Guys!

0:14:31 > 0:14:33ALARM STOPS

0:14:39 > 0:14:41SCREAMS FADE

0:14:41 > 0:14:44HEARTBEAT THUDS

0:15:04 > 0:15:08SIREN WAILS

0:15:08 > 0:15:123-0-0-6, multiple casualties at the rear of the building.

0:15:15 > 0:15:17All right, folks - attention, please.

0:15:17 > 0:15:20We've got incoming from a crowd crush at a nightclub.

0:15:20 > 0:15:25Now, we can expect respiratory problems and related injuries.

0:15:25 > 0:15:27St James' is bearing the brunt of it,

0:15:27 > 0:15:31but heads up, folks, we are not in Kansas any more.

0:15:31 > 0:15:33Better practice my "I care" face, then.

0:15:34 > 0:15:36You might want to work on that.

0:15:36 > 0:15:41Yeah, it'd be the perfect showcase for your...compassion.

0:15:42 > 0:15:44With a bunch of wreck-heads?

0:15:44 > 0:15:46Somebody please pass me an oil can.

0:15:46 > 0:15:48I think she's rusting up.

0:15:48 > 0:15:49Why are you acting weird?

0:15:51 > 0:15:52I know why.

0:15:52 > 0:15:55All right, this is Kyle Jenkyns, 27.

0:15:55 > 0:15:58He was crushed in a crowd surge at a nightclub approximately

0:15:58 > 0:16:0130 minutes ago. His resp rates are high at 30.

0:16:01 > 0:16:04Suspected compression asphyxiation,

0:16:04 > 0:16:07GCS 15, pulse 110, BP 135/80,

0:16:07 > 0:16:10sats 96%. There's no suspicion of C-spine injury.

0:16:10 > 0:16:13Hi, there. My name's Dylan, all right?

0:16:13 > 0:16:14We're going to try and see if we can work out

0:16:14 > 0:16:16what's going on with your breathing difficulties.

0:16:16 > 0:16:18Is he going to be OK?

0:16:18 > 0:16:20And that's Stuart Jenkyns. He was caught in the same crush.

0:16:20 > 0:16:22All his obs are fine, but he was pretty breathless when

0:16:22 > 0:16:24we found him, so we thought it best to bring him in.

0:16:24 > 0:16:26And today's his 18th birthday!

0:16:26 > 0:16:28Ah! Happy birthday, mate.

0:16:28 > 0:16:30Ah, man! I remember my 18th.

0:16:30 > 0:16:34I woke up half-naked in a field outside Cardiff airport.

0:16:34 > 0:16:36Yeah, all right, Jez, not now, mate.

0:16:37 > 0:16:40Shall we get some bloods off then, please? We need...

0:16:40 > 0:16:45Us&Es, FBC, glucose, blood gasses, and a group and save.

0:16:45 > 0:16:46That's it, Kyle - take it easy.

0:16:46 > 0:16:49Does it hurt when you breathe in? It does?

0:16:49 > 0:16:51OK. Do you want to lead this chest exam, then, Seb?

0:16:51 > 0:16:53David?

0:16:55 > 0:16:57So? How did you get on out there?

0:16:59 > 0:17:01Wrong answer, David.

0:17:01 > 0:17:04Remember the reason why you're doing this. Step it up.

0:17:05 > 0:17:08I jumped off a three-storey building(!)

0:17:08 > 0:17:10Yeah, sure you did, Dave.

0:17:10 > 0:17:11We're taking ten.

0:17:13 > 0:17:15It's David.

0:17:15 > 0:17:17This is Owen Cooke.

0:17:17 > 0:17:20He's got a displaced wrist fracture from being crushed in the club.

0:17:20 > 0:17:22His resps are 18,

0:17:22 > 0:17:24pulse 70, BP 120/80,

0:17:24 > 0:17:27and he had nitrous oxide en route.

0:17:27 > 0:17:29I think he overdid it on the laughing gas.

0:17:31 > 0:17:34What you saying, then? Are you seeing someone?

0:17:34 > 0:17:38I'm afraid so. Can you try and move your fingers for me?

0:17:38 > 0:17:41Louise, IV access for some morphine, please?

0:17:41 > 0:17:43- On it. - Ah!

0:17:43 > 0:17:44Cos I'm...

0:17:44 > 0:17:47I'm sensing a connection.

0:17:47 > 0:17:50We're not allowed to date the punters, unfortunately.

0:17:50 > 0:17:52I can take you for an X-ray, though.

0:17:52 > 0:17:53It's a date.

0:17:55 > 0:17:58Ow! What are you doing, man?

0:17:58 > 0:18:00Sorry, I should have said it might hurt.

0:18:02 > 0:18:04- Hey! - It's not nice, is it?

0:18:04 > 0:18:06Mate, don't pinch the nurses.

0:18:06 > 0:18:09You think it's funny? That's assault.

0:18:09 > 0:18:12If you want my professional diagnosis,

0:18:12 > 0:18:13some signs of injected sclera,

0:18:13 > 0:18:17dilated pupils, and a dryness of the throat can only mean one thing...

0:18:17 > 0:18:19You're high.

0:18:20 > 0:18:21It's fine.

0:18:21 > 0:18:24Why don't I dim the lights and get you both some sugary tea

0:18:24 > 0:18:25while we wait for your X-ray?

0:18:29 > 0:18:31You're really going to run around getting drinks

0:18:31 > 0:18:32for a couple of stoners?

0:18:32 > 0:18:34You're not exactly showing your compassion, Louise.

0:18:34 > 0:18:36Give me a dying old lady, I'll give you compassion.

0:18:36 > 0:18:38I need to get out of here, man.

0:18:38 > 0:18:41Mate, look at your arm. Don't be a div all your life.

0:18:41 > 0:18:43You got your green on you?

0:18:44 > 0:18:47- ED and chill? - Come.

0:18:54 > 0:18:57Mrs Peters. Intermittent chest pains.

0:18:57 > 0:18:58Didn't even have to speak to me.

0:18:58 > 0:19:00Where do I sign up?

0:19:02 > 0:19:05Hey, you know, I could get used to this.

0:19:05 > 0:19:07Yeah, it makes you even more redundant.

0:19:07 > 0:19:09Ha-ha, very funny(!)

0:19:17 > 0:19:18Some time today, Seb.

0:19:20 > 0:19:23Trachea central, decreased expansion on the left side,

0:19:23 > 0:19:26hyper resonant to percussion,

0:19:26 > 0:19:27decreased breath sounds.

0:19:28 > 0:19:30Pneumothorax.

0:19:30 > 0:19:32Right. That took far too long. OK?

0:19:32 > 0:19:34Your decision-making needs to be much sharper. Can we get 10 mls

0:19:34 > 0:19:37of 1% lignocaine, please? And a chest drain, Seb.

0:19:37 > 0:19:38Hello. Who are you?

0:19:38 > 0:19:40Their mate. You?

0:19:40 > 0:19:42He's not MY mate.

0:19:42 > 0:19:43Oh, yeah, I've got it, pal.

0:19:43 > 0:19:46OK, this isn't a youth club. Would you mind waiting outside, please?

0:19:46 > 0:19:49- I know you... - Oh, you do?

0:19:49 > 0:19:51Don't take it personally, I never call anyone back.

0:19:51 > 0:19:53Can we concentrate on the medicine,

0:19:53 > 0:19:55rather than trying to pick up men?

0:19:55 > 0:19:57You all right?

0:19:57 > 0:20:00Yeah, I... Get back to bed. I'll talk to you in a minute.

0:20:00 > 0:20:01Now, deep breaths for me, please, Stuart.

0:20:01 > 0:20:04Sorry, I can call security. I'm sure they'd love to meet you.

0:20:04 > 0:20:06- DAN SIGHS - No need to call in the muscle.

0:20:10 > 0:20:12Dr Grayling, have you ever done a chest drain before?

0:20:12 > 0:20:14What do you think we did in training?

0:20:14 > 0:20:16Well, evidently not enough. This one's yours, OK?

0:20:16 > 0:20:20It looks like you sustained a collapsed lung in the crush,

0:20:20 > 0:20:22so we're going to insert a chest drain to re-inflate it.

0:20:24 > 0:20:27Right. When you're ready, make the incision.

0:20:33 > 0:20:36OK. You need the artery forceps.

0:20:36 > 0:20:38Now, you're going to dissect the skin

0:20:38 > 0:20:40and the layer of fat above the rib...

0:20:45 > 0:20:49OK, insert a finger into the pleural space. That's it.

0:20:54 > 0:20:55Wow. 18 today?

0:20:55 > 0:20:57That's quite a milestone.

0:20:57 > 0:20:59Yeah, key in the door, and I kill my brother.

0:20:59 > 0:21:01Great start to adult life(!)

0:21:01 > 0:21:02We won't let that happen.

0:21:02 > 0:21:04- Promise? - No-one dies tonight.

0:21:06 > 0:21:07Not on my watch.

0:21:15 > 0:21:16This way, George.

0:21:18 > 0:21:20Ah, George. Frequent flyer.

0:21:20 > 0:21:23Police picked him up having a fight with a set of traffic lights.

0:21:23 > 0:21:24Did he see red?

0:21:26 > 0:21:28That briefcase - I've never seen him without it.

0:21:28 > 0:21:31In fact, Noel and Big Mac used to have a running bet

0:21:31 > 0:21:32on what's inside it.

0:21:32 > 0:21:34Did they ever find out?

0:21:34 > 0:21:35No.

0:21:36 > 0:21:38He can't remember the combination.

0:21:40 > 0:21:43Right. Now it's asking, are you feeling nauseous?

0:21:43 > 0:21:45You want to wash us?

0:21:45 > 0:21:47No. Do you feel sick, George?

0:21:47 > 0:21:49We'll just put "yes".

0:21:49 > 0:21:51- Are you bleeding? - I'm bleeding drunk.

0:21:52 > 0:21:55HE VOMITS

0:21:55 > 0:21:58I don't think this is meant for every patient, Noel.

0:21:58 > 0:22:01I am but humbly following instructions, Charlie.

0:22:01 > 0:22:03All right, George. Excuse me.

0:22:03 > 0:22:05Either of you gents got a minute?

0:22:06 > 0:22:08Oh, I'm...

0:22:08 > 0:22:12Um, tell you what, you take him and you get your phone back.

0:22:12 > 0:22:14Well, that's not how it works.

0:22:15 > 0:22:17Apparently, it is.

0:22:32 > 0:22:33Need a tissue?

0:22:34 > 0:22:36Fine, thanks.

0:22:36 > 0:22:37If your friends have been taking something...

0:22:37 > 0:22:40How much does the NHS waste sorting out booze-soaked livers?

0:22:40 > 0:22:44But that's OK, that's a socially acceptable problem.

0:22:45 > 0:22:47I wasn't judging.

0:22:47 > 0:22:50I earn 30 grand a year, drive a nice car,

0:22:50 > 0:22:53rent a tidy little flat in the water quarter.

0:22:53 > 0:22:55Think I'm doing just fine...mate.

0:23:03 > 0:23:05- Ah! - Oh, sorry. Did that hurt?

0:23:09 > 0:23:12Like I said, wipe your nose.

0:23:13 > 0:23:16- You sure you want to smoke another one?- Yeah, of course!

0:23:16 > 0:23:18Feels like college again, man.

0:23:18 > 0:23:23Going into Mr Adam's class, three doughnuts each...

0:23:23 > 0:23:24Proper red eye.

0:23:24 > 0:23:28"Nobody gets hay-fever in December". What an idiot!

0:23:28 > 0:23:30He always said you were nuts.

0:23:30 > 0:23:33The definition of madness is doing the same thing over and over again

0:23:33 > 0:23:35and expecting a different outcome.

0:23:35 > 0:23:39Yeah, yeah, how profound. Come on. Sharing is caring. Gimme that.

0:23:39 > 0:23:40What are you doing?!

0:23:42 > 0:23:44Pass it!

0:23:44 > 0:23:47- KNOCK ON DOOR - Oi! This ain't Amsterdam. Get out.

0:23:49 > 0:23:51I ain't got time to muck around.

0:23:52 > 0:23:54Move. KNOCK ON DOOR

0:23:59 > 0:24:02- You kidding me? - Medicinal, innit.

0:24:02 > 0:24:04Bed. Now.

0:24:08 > 0:24:10- Is he always like this? - He's fine.

0:24:13 > 0:24:16OK, David, let's get FBCs, Us&Es, and an ECG, please.

0:24:16 > 0:24:18I'm sorry, excuse me?

0:24:18 > 0:24:19It's cool. He's my mate.

0:24:19 > 0:24:21Yeah, it's fine. He can stay.

0:24:21 > 0:24:24- OK. - These tests -

0:24:24 > 0:24:29they won't show, you know, anything in my system that shouldn't be?

0:24:29 > 0:24:31Well, we don't specifically test for illegals,

0:24:31 > 0:24:34but to be honest with you, we don't really need to.

0:24:34 > 0:24:36You seen your pupils?

0:24:37 > 0:24:39Are you going to call my mum?

0:24:39 > 0:24:41No. We won't, will we? It's not going to stop us

0:24:41 > 0:24:43giving you the old drugs lecture when we're done.

0:24:43 > 0:24:46What is this, a public information film? He's FINE.

0:24:46 > 0:24:47I'm looking after him.

0:24:47 > 0:24:51Yes. You're doing a grand job so far(!)

0:24:53 > 0:24:56Right, well, I'll be back with your test results.

0:24:56 > 0:24:58Just try and sit still.

0:25:04 > 0:25:07Look, trouble. I'm done here, going to head back,

0:25:07 > 0:25:09see if there's any stragglers who want to keep going.

0:25:09 > 0:25:11- You're actually mental. - You in?

0:25:11 > 0:25:13They've put a tube in Kyle's chest.

0:25:13 > 0:25:15You only get one 18th.

0:25:15 > 0:25:16He'll go nuts.

0:25:16 > 0:25:18And then he'll calm down.

0:25:21 > 0:25:23You all right?

0:25:23 > 0:25:24Fine. I just feel a little weird.

0:25:24 > 0:25:28Yeah, coke'll do that. Tell you what you need - a downer.

0:25:28 > 0:25:31Gravity - what goes up, and all that.

0:25:31 > 0:25:35Oh, I haven't even had a chance to say "happy birthday" properly.

0:25:36 > 0:25:37What about my brother?

0:25:37 > 0:25:39Oh, don't worry. I'll deal with him.

0:25:43 > 0:25:45Can I go home yet?

0:25:45 > 0:25:47I would just like to look at your feet first.

0:25:47 > 0:25:49At least get me a drink.

0:25:49 > 0:25:52Well, it's water, weak tea,

0:25:52 > 0:25:54or hand sanitiser, I'm afraid.

0:25:54 > 0:25:55Been there before.

0:25:57 > 0:25:59OK, this does look like trench foot.

0:26:00 > 0:26:02Left your case out front, George.

0:26:07 > 0:26:09You still can't remember the combination, then?

0:26:09 > 0:26:10Get lost.

0:26:10 > 0:26:12Charming, as ever(!) I don't know why I bother.

0:26:12 > 0:26:14It's shut for a reason!

0:26:17 > 0:26:21I tried convincing him. Said he should stay.

0:26:21 > 0:26:22You know what it's like...

0:26:22 > 0:26:26Cut the bull. This is your idea.

0:26:26 > 0:26:29Said I'd go with him. Keep an eye on him, like.

0:26:29 > 0:26:31Wouldn't want him getting into trouble.

0:26:31 > 0:26:34No more mucking about, Dan. Just leave him.

0:26:36 > 0:26:38You could have got me arrested earlier.

0:26:38 > 0:26:41Grassing me up to security like that.

0:26:41 > 0:26:44I know times have changed, mate, but that's low. Really low.

0:26:44 > 0:26:47I had to get the message across somehow, didn't I?

0:26:47 > 0:26:49Oh, it's loud and clear, don't you worry.

0:26:49 > 0:26:51I'll look after him.

0:26:53 > 0:26:55Ah! Ah!

0:26:55 > 0:26:57Hey, hey, hey, come on, where are you going?

0:26:57 > 0:27:00Why is it everybody's blood pressure seems to rise when you're around?

0:27:00 > 0:27:04It's fine. I was just leaving.

0:27:04 > 0:27:05Don't wait up.

0:27:07 > 0:27:08Do you believe in God?

0:27:08 > 0:27:11Oh, chill out, they'll think you're mental.

0:27:11 > 0:27:13Let's just treat your wrist, yeah?

0:27:13 > 0:27:17People devoting their whole lives over a 2,000-year-old story book.

0:27:17 > 0:27:18That's mental.

0:27:18 > 0:27:21It's still one of our first attempts at explaining the world.

0:27:21 > 0:27:22It shouldn't be discounted.

0:27:22 > 0:27:25Exactly. Our first attempt.

0:27:25 > 0:27:27Ergo, our worst attempt.

0:27:27 > 0:27:30Ten points to Gryffindor for using ergo in a sentence.

0:27:31 > 0:27:34- I can't feel my arm. - Yeah, it's perfectly normal.

0:27:34 > 0:27:36It's not normal, you moron.

0:27:36 > 0:27:38I can't feel my arm.

0:27:39 > 0:27:41What's wrong with my arm? Are you trying to poison me?

0:27:41 > 0:27:44It just means the medication's working.

0:27:44 > 0:27:46We're going to reduce your wrist. You shouldn't feel a thing.

0:27:46 > 0:27:48Just do as they say, yeah, Owen?

0:27:54 > 0:27:56OK, Louise, get the back slab on,

0:27:56 > 0:27:58and check the X-ray for the position of the fracture.

0:27:58 > 0:28:00They've been planning on taking me since the club, ain't they!

0:28:05 > 0:28:06Is this normal, as well?

0:28:06 > 0:28:08You've just snapped his bones in half,

0:28:08 > 0:28:10I think he's allowed to act a little weird.

0:28:10 > 0:28:11The back slab, Lou.

0:28:15 > 0:28:17Look, David, it's a Saturday night.

0:28:17 > 0:28:19I mean, it's easier to find someone who isn't chewing their face off.

0:28:19 > 0:28:22Well, I've got reason to believe he's not planning on

0:28:22 > 0:28:24- staying much longer.- Oh! Do you hear that? A bed for you. Result.

0:28:24 > 0:28:28Well, his pupils were dilated and he was hyper alert...

0:28:28 > 0:28:31Sounds like he had a good night. Does he have capacity?

0:28:31 > 0:28:32Well, the younger one is only 18, so barely,

0:28:32 > 0:28:34but I was going to suggest...

0:28:34 > 0:28:36No, no, no, no, no. Suggested, considered, denied.

0:28:36 > 0:28:38Look, we deal with the patients who actually want to be here.

0:28:38 > 0:28:41We don't have time to be baby-sitting the whole of Holby.

0:28:41 > 0:28:42You understand?

0:28:45 > 0:28:48I need you to get me out of here.

0:28:48 > 0:28:49You said he'd be discharged now.

0:28:49 > 0:28:51- Yeah, when his results are back. - Ah!

0:28:51 > 0:28:55- Hey! Calm down. - They're stalling. I told you.

0:28:55 > 0:28:57They're trying to keep me here.

0:28:57 > 0:28:58Sit down.

0:28:58 > 0:29:00Oh, no. No, no, no.

0:29:00 > 0:29:03- What?- They've got to you as well, ain't they?

0:29:03 > 0:29:06- In there.- Keep a lid on it. They're going to lock you up in a minute.

0:29:06 > 0:29:08When I was a child,

0:29:08 > 0:29:11I spoke as a child,

0:29:11 > 0:29:14I understood as a child, I thought like a child.

0:29:14 > 0:29:15Has he always been religious?

0:29:16 > 0:29:19His mum was a right Bible basher, but not him.

0:29:19 > 0:29:22Just knows a lot about it.

0:29:22 > 0:29:24This is normal for him.

0:29:24 > 0:29:26Yeah, totally normal.

0:29:26 > 0:29:28I understood like a child... I thought...

0:29:30 > 0:29:31I thought like a child...

0:29:31 > 0:29:34- You sure Ky will be OK? - Change the record.

0:29:38 > 0:29:41I'll send him this - let him know we're OK.

0:29:43 > 0:29:45All right, Kyle? How are you, mate?

0:29:45 > 0:29:48All right, Ky, I'm with Dan, I'm fine.

0:29:48 > 0:29:49So, he was OK about me coming?

0:29:49 > 0:29:50Yeah, of course.

0:29:52 > 0:29:54Told you. You need a downer.

0:29:56 > 0:29:59No, no, no, not ketamine. I promised.

0:29:59 > 0:30:01- Oh... - Regret-amine.

0:30:01 > 0:30:04Seriously. You need to relax.

0:30:07 > 0:30:10Take ten minutes. Little disco nap.

0:30:18 > 0:30:20- Promise you'll come back? - Promise.

0:30:38 > 0:30:41I'm not stupid, you know! I see what's going on. Agendas!

0:30:41 > 0:30:44There's a lot of agendas going on right now, but I'm aware of it,

0:30:44 > 0:30:46trying to put this on me. Are you stupid or something?

0:30:46 > 0:30:47Everything OK, face-ache?

0:30:47 > 0:30:50He's got a questionable mental state and he's refusing to cooperate.

0:30:50 > 0:30:51- Owen? - ..I know what's going on.

0:30:53 > 0:30:55Who's this, what? What, your leader, yeah?

0:30:55 > 0:30:58Cos I'm not falling for it. You ain't taking me nowhere, fam!

0:30:58 > 0:30:59- It's OK. - Eh? Ready for you!

0:30:59 > 0:31:02Calm down, calm down. We're here to help you.

0:31:02 > 0:31:04Nobody's planning on taking you anywhere, OK?

0:31:04 > 0:31:06Why is it so hot in here?

0:31:06 > 0:31:08Turned up the heating... It's too hot. It's too hot...

0:31:08 > 0:31:09Call duty psych.

0:31:09 > 0:31:12Let them know we've got a patient that may need a section 2.

0:31:12 > 0:31:14And update Elle, as well.

0:31:14 > 0:31:16Why are you doing all this? He's not mental.

0:31:16 > 0:31:19They've been planning this for a long time!

0:31:19 > 0:31:22OK, we'll have to hold him here until duty psych arrive.

0:31:22 > 0:31:24- Drugs?- He'll be fine. He just needs to sleep it off a bit.

0:31:24 > 0:31:26Defending him - it isn't the same as helping him.

0:31:26 > 0:31:30- I need some air. - OWEN CONTINUES RAMBLING

0:31:30 > 0:31:31Lou!

0:31:35 > 0:31:36Where they going?

0:31:40 > 0:31:43I know what's best for my boy, thanks.

0:31:43 > 0:31:45Clearly not. He needs help.

0:31:45 > 0:31:47Why is that so hard for you to understand?

0:31:47 > 0:31:50He's always done mad stuff. Always.

0:31:56 > 0:31:59What does that make me, if I didn't know he's flipping mental?

0:31:59 > 0:32:01Some mate I am.

0:32:01 > 0:32:04Get me out of here! OWEN SCREAMS

0:32:07 > 0:32:10This isn't about you, it's about Owen, and right now,

0:32:10 > 0:32:12he is scared and confused and he needs someone he knows in there.

0:32:12 > 0:32:14Someone he can trust.

0:32:22 > 0:32:24So why are you still standing here?

0:32:26 > 0:32:27And you think he's in danger?

0:32:27 > 0:32:29Well, it's not going to look very good for us if

0:32:29 > 0:32:31he comes back in here with an overdose, is it?

0:32:31 > 0:32:34Jacob said I was needed here more.

0:32:34 > 0:32:36You think I would have lasted this long if I listened to

0:32:36 > 0:32:38every word my superiors told me?

0:32:38 > 0:32:39Sorry, have you MET Jacob(?)

0:32:41 > 0:32:43Remind me - what happened last week?

0:32:43 > 0:32:46- I didn't act on my concerns. - Exactly.

0:32:48 > 0:32:52We don't need you to be a cowardly lion, David.

0:32:52 > 0:32:54We need you...

0:32:54 > 0:32:55to roar.

0:32:57 > 0:32:59No, really. Say it.

0:33:01 > 0:33:04I'm not a cowardly lion.

0:33:07 > 0:33:10Now roar. I mean it.

0:33:10 > 0:33:12Do it.

0:33:15 > 0:33:16Me?

0:33:19 > 0:33:25DAVID ROARS

0:33:28 > 0:33:30There you go.

0:33:36 > 0:33:38PHONE BEEPS

0:33:40 > 0:33:43All right, Kyle? How are ya, mate?

0:33:43 > 0:33:46Hi, Ky. I'm with Dan, I'm fine.

0:33:46 > 0:33:50Please. Please can you go and check on him? Please?

0:33:58 > 0:34:00Oh, no...

0:34:02 > 0:34:03Oh, no, Stu, Stu...

0:34:05 > 0:34:09- No, no, no, no, no... - STUART GAGS

0:34:11 > 0:34:13Stu, Stu, Stu...

0:34:21 > 0:34:24No, he doesn't look good. He's propped up outside.

0:34:24 > 0:34:26Just hurry.

0:34:32 > 0:34:36Owen. Can you remember where you are?

0:34:39 > 0:34:41You're at Holby City ED.

0:34:43 > 0:34:45Duty psych's about an hour away.

0:34:45 > 0:34:48Right, guess we'll hold this pose then, shall we?

0:34:48 > 0:34:51What happens when they get here? Are you sectioning him?

0:34:51 > 0:34:54The duty psych will give him a full proper assessment.

0:34:54 > 0:34:58They'll decide if he needs a psychiatric bed.

0:34:58 > 0:35:00But just to warn you - it might not be local.

0:35:00 > 0:35:01What do you mean?

0:35:01 > 0:35:04We just don't have enough beds for psych patients,

0:35:04 > 0:35:06and we can't look after him here, not safely.

0:35:06 > 0:35:07Where are you taking him?

0:35:07 > 0:35:10- Well, last week someone was taken to Liverpool.- Are we going home now?

0:35:12 > 0:35:14No. No, we're not going home.

0:35:16 > 0:35:17You lied to me.

0:35:21 > 0:35:24You're not very well, Owen. These guys are going to make you better.

0:35:26 > 0:35:30No... No...

0:35:32 > 0:35:35You can act up all you want, mate. I'm not leaving you.

0:35:36 > 0:35:42When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child...

0:35:42 > 0:35:45I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I...

0:35:47 > 0:35:49Why can't I remember the next bit?

0:35:49 > 0:35:52I reasoned like a child.

0:35:52 > 0:35:55When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me.

0:35:55 > 0:35:591 Corinthians, 13:11?

0:36:05 > 0:36:06Am I sick?

0:36:06 > 0:36:10Yeah. But we'll get you better. I promise.

0:36:20 > 0:36:21Nice work, Nurse Tyler.

0:36:22 > 0:36:23He's here!

0:36:27 > 0:36:31Right, I've got a pulse. Stuart? Can you hear me?

0:36:33 > 0:36:37Stuart? All right, mate, it's Iain. Right, trolley, please, Jez.

0:36:37 > 0:36:39STUART MUTTERS

0:36:39 > 0:36:41That's it, mate, you keep talking to me.

0:37:01 > 0:37:03Dan didn't see me like this, did he?

0:37:03 > 0:37:07Don't worry. He didn't see a thing.

0:37:07 > 0:37:09That's it, breathe. That's it.

0:37:18 > 0:37:21Sorry, George, I... I didn't mean to offend you.

0:37:21 > 0:37:22You failed.

0:37:22 > 0:37:23Don't you... You know?

0:37:25 > 0:37:27- Don't you want to open it?- No.

0:37:29 > 0:37:32- What's in it, George? - Mind your own business.

0:37:32 > 0:37:36- If it's an AK47, Big Mac owes me £100.- Drop it.

0:37:39 > 0:37:43- You don't know, do you? - Oh, please, just leave me alone.

0:37:43 > 0:37:45What if it's something that can help you? Like money?

0:37:45 > 0:37:48Even if I could remember the code, it stays shut.

0:37:48 > 0:37:50- You hear me?- But, can't you see that, if we can...

0:37:50 > 0:37:52It's just a reminder. Of everything I've lost.

0:37:52 > 0:37:54But, George it could change your life...

0:37:54 > 0:37:56Just take it, then!

0:37:56 > 0:37:57Leave me alone.

0:38:07 > 0:38:09- Sorry.- I thought I told you not to...- Not now, Jacob.

0:38:09 > 0:38:11All right, what have we got?

0:38:11 > 0:38:13This is Stuart Jenkyns, 18 years old.

0:38:13 > 0:38:15Suspected overdose approximately 30 minutes ago.

0:38:15 > 0:38:21GCS 13, tachy at 140, BP 140/90, sats 92%, resps of 10.

0:38:21 > 0:38:24He's burning up at 39.5. Let's get him across, please.

0:38:24 > 0:38:26- Yeah. - One, two, three.

0:38:26 > 0:38:29All right, did you take anything else, Stu?

0:38:29 > 0:38:31OK, 4 mg of lorazepam, please.

0:38:31 > 0:38:33Let's get a fan on him and let's do a BM.

0:38:33 > 0:38:37I'm going to need some ice packs, and some cooled IV saline.

0:38:37 > 0:38:38Let's do some bloods,

0:38:38 > 0:38:40including clotting and a venous blood gas, please.

0:38:40 > 0:38:41What's wrong with him?

0:38:41 > 0:38:43The drugs he's taken are affecting his ability to

0:38:43 > 0:38:45control his body temperature. We need to cool him immediately.

0:38:45 > 0:38:48- Any idea what he's taken? - This, for starters. Ketamine.

0:38:48 > 0:38:50Ah, we should have done that lecture after all.

0:38:50 > 0:38:53All right, he's in VF. Let's shock him.

0:39:02 > 0:39:05You thick or something?

0:39:05 > 0:39:07I wasn't trying to steal anything from it, George.

0:39:07 > 0:39:10I haven't opened it in 15 years. What makes you so special?

0:39:13 > 0:39:17Come on, then. Let's get you back to bed.

0:39:37 > 0:39:38Do you mind?

0:39:38 > 0:39:40Yes. I thought we'd established that.

0:39:40 > 0:39:43Just one last chance, George. That's all. Please?

0:39:45 > 0:39:49I knew eight years of working with Big Mac would come in handy one day.

0:39:49 > 0:39:53That tapping. It's Morse code, isn't it?

0:39:53 > 0:39:56BRIEFCASE SNAPS OPEN

0:40:00 > 0:40:02100 milligrams IV amiodarone going in.

0:40:07 > 0:40:08And, pulse check.

0:40:10 > 0:40:12Still in VF.

0:40:12 > 0:40:14All right. Charging.

0:40:15 > 0:40:16Oxygen away.

0:40:18 > 0:40:20Stand clear. Shocking.

0:40:26 > 0:40:30Great. He's back in sinus rhythm. Well done, David.

0:40:31 > 0:40:35All right, let's get a 12 lead, and someone call ITU, please.

0:40:51 > 0:40:54Worth it, was it?

0:40:54 > 0:40:58- I thought...- What happened in your life to make you so spiteful?

0:40:59 > 0:41:03You think you're so big and clever, don't you?

0:41:03 > 0:41:05But you did this.

0:41:05 > 0:41:07And for what?

0:41:07 > 0:41:09To prove a point?

0:41:09 > 0:41:11To justify your lifestyle?

0:41:11 > 0:41:13To get back at your mate?

0:41:13 > 0:41:15I just wanted to have a good time.

0:41:15 > 0:41:17He's practically dead!

0:41:22 > 0:41:26Grow up, Daniel.

0:41:28 > 0:41:30Before it's too late.

0:41:41 > 0:41:42My man.

0:41:46 > 0:41:48Well, thank you,

0:41:48 > 0:41:50I've now treated a homeless man's trench-foot-ridden feet.

0:41:50 > 0:41:52Hand it over.

0:41:52 > 0:41:54Fine. But you can thank me.

0:41:54 > 0:41:57Eight matches. Eight messages.

0:41:57 > 0:42:00Yeah, I went for pictures with a Malia 2009 Facebook album vibe.

0:42:00 > 0:42:02What does NSA mean?

0:42:02 > 0:42:04No strings attached.

0:42:04 > 0:42:05Ahem...

0:42:06 > 0:42:08Didn't think that was your sort of thing?

0:42:08 > 0:42:11No. It... It was Cal's idea.

0:42:11 > 0:42:13I'm certainly not looking for NSA.

0:42:13 > 0:42:16Well, there's nothing wrong with a bit of online dating.

0:42:16 > 0:42:18Here, do you mind?

0:42:19 > 0:42:21Keep it brief, but meaningful.

0:42:21 > 0:42:24Who's that physicist that you like again?

0:42:24 > 0:42:25- Feynman. - Feynman.

0:42:27 > 0:42:30"Here I stand, atoms with consciousness,

0:42:30 > 0:42:32"matter with curiosity.

0:42:32 > 0:42:36"A universe of atoms, an atom in the universe."

0:42:37 > 0:42:39That is never going to work.

0:42:39 > 0:42:41What do you know? Right, I need a drink.

0:42:41 > 0:42:43Mam wants me to call grandma,

0:42:43 > 0:42:46let her know that I'm not welcoming in the next generation of Munroes.

0:42:46 > 0:42:48Oooh, heaven forbid...

0:42:55 > 0:42:56Is he going to be OK?

0:42:56 > 0:42:58Teenagers are pretty resilient, if not stupid.

0:42:58 > 0:43:01That doesn't mean he's not critically ill.

0:43:01 > 0:43:02But he's not going to die?

0:43:15 > 0:43:16Get out of here.

0:43:18 > 0:43:19I'm sorry.

0:43:20 > 0:43:25Sorry? You nearly killed my brother, but, oh, good, you're sorry(!)

0:43:26 > 0:43:28Make him hate me.

0:43:28 > 0:43:31I think you've done a good enough job of that yourself.

0:43:33 > 0:43:35What did you get out of this?

0:43:42 > 0:43:46I missed hanging around with you. He was the next best thing.

0:43:48 > 0:43:51- What happened to us? - You happened.

0:44:02 > 0:44:04He's off to a homeless veterans' shelter.

0:44:04 > 0:44:06Our George is a war hero.

0:44:06 > 0:44:10You don't say? Well, it's been a real honour treating you, George.

0:44:13 > 0:44:16- Bye, George. - See you around.

0:44:16 > 0:44:18Hey, I sincerely hope not.

0:44:20 > 0:44:23- Now that's something you don't get with a machine.- Mm.

0:44:26 > 0:44:29So, how did not being a hard-faced cow go?

0:44:29 > 0:44:31Not bad for some cringe-y HR exercise.

0:44:31 > 0:44:33I can't believe you guys took it so seriously.

0:44:33 > 0:44:35Put you in your place, didn't I?

0:44:38 > 0:44:40Sorry, Jacob... Jacob, I'm sorry...

0:44:40 > 0:44:41Unnecessary, I...

0:44:41 > 0:44:45I still want to know how Henry Gale from HR would react

0:44:45 > 0:44:47if we told him how to do HIS job.

0:44:47 > 0:44:49- Henry Gale? - Do you know him?

0:44:49 > 0:44:52Dorothy's uncle. In The Wizard Of Oz.

0:44:52 > 0:44:55I mean, it's a classic.

0:44:56 > 0:44:58The Scarecrow needed a brain.

0:44:58 > 0:45:00Charlie made me roar like a lion.

0:45:00 > 0:45:02He said I needed oiling.

0:45:02 > 0:45:05The Lion, the Scarecrow, and the Tin Man.

0:45:05 > 0:45:06This is a stitch-up.

0:45:06 > 0:45:09DUFFY LAUGHS It worked!

0:45:09 > 0:45:11I can't believe it, it worked!

0:45:11 > 0:45:13Of course it worked, yeah, because it was a great deal

0:45:13 > 0:45:16of intelligence, it was funny...

0:45:24 > 0:45:26Dropping a load of grief on people's heads

0:45:26 > 0:45:29is not going to make them work better.

0:45:29 > 0:45:30You want a bet?

0:45:32 > 0:45:34Yeah. Actually, I do.

0:45:35 > 0:45:36What?

0:45:36 > 0:45:39I bet you I can get much better results out of people

0:45:39 > 0:45:41by not shouting at them.

0:45:41 > 0:45:44And you have to buy me breakfast if I can prove I'm right.

0:45:48 > 0:45:50You don't do a lot of betting, do you, Charlie?

0:45:50 > 0:45:53So, put your money where your mouth is.

0:45:53 > 0:45:55Ah, you see, see, that's not a fair bet.

0:45:55 > 0:45:57I mean, a pep talk from Charlie Fairhead,

0:45:57 > 0:45:59and anyone is going to work their arses off.

0:45:59 > 0:46:00Make it harder, then.

0:46:05 > 0:46:06Wizard Of Oz.

0:46:06 > 0:46:09Ha-ha! How's about that?

0:46:09 > 0:46:13I can only use The Wizard Of Oz as my point of reference

0:46:13 > 0:46:17if I want to offer someone advice or encouragement.

0:46:17 > 0:46:18How's about that?

0:46:18 > 0:46:21Yeah, but that's not how betting works, Charlie.

0:46:21 > 0:46:24It's easy just to tell people what their faults are.

0:46:24 > 0:46:29Especially from a distance. You know, like you need to be braver.

0:46:29 > 0:46:31You need to be kinder.

0:46:31 > 0:46:35You need to grow a little common sense.

0:46:35 > 0:46:39But, if you really want to help people, you have to actively

0:46:39 > 0:46:43encourage them to be the best that they can possibly be.

0:46:43 > 0:46:47That's how you get results. That's how you make a difference, Jacob.

0:46:49 > 0:46:53Yeah, you see? See? You see? This is what I'm talking about.

0:46:53 > 0:46:56Charlie, you're a wizard. It's not fair, that's not a fair bet.

0:46:56 > 0:46:58I like my bacon extra crispy.

0:47:00 > 0:47:02- This guy... - Well?

0:47:04 > 0:47:08All right. You're on.

0:47:10 > 0:47:13- So there was no HR directive. - No, you mug.

0:47:13 > 0:47:15- Not cool, guys. - Very not cool.

0:47:15 > 0:47:18But we were only trying to show you what you were capable of,

0:47:18 > 0:47:21that you had all those things in you all along.

0:47:21 > 0:47:22Well, I was nice to everyone.

0:47:22 > 0:47:24I jumped off a building.

0:47:24 > 0:47:25I just want to go home.

0:47:25 > 0:47:28Well, maybe you could try clicking your heels together three times,

0:47:28 > 0:47:30see if that takes you...

0:47:30 > 0:47:32Come on. Let's go get our own breakfast.

0:47:32 > 0:47:33It's funny! It's really funny, Noel!

0:47:33 > 0:47:35Guys! Come on, it was fun... It was funny...

0:47:35 > 0:47:37And if you learnt something...

0:47:37 > 0:47:39All right. I guess breakfast is on me.

0:47:42 > 0:47:43Actually....

0:47:43 > 0:47:47Less chat, guys. We're busy, if you hadn't noticed.

0:47:48 > 0:47:50Did we just get told off?

0:47:51 > 0:47:54Last week's report. Wasn't exactly glowing.

0:47:58 > 0:48:02Just click your heels together three times, and everything will be fine.

0:48:02 > 0:48:04Worth a try.

0:48:05 > 0:48:06Oi, lads, lads, LADS!

0:48:06 > 0:48:09Oh, make it stop, Charlie. It's not even nine o'clock.

0:48:09 > 0:48:13- In here, shut up, sit down, and behave!- He'll calm down.

0:48:13 > 0:48:16If you can stop him behaving like a bulldog chewing on a wasp

0:48:16 > 0:48:18for the evening, breakfast is on me.

0:48:18 > 0:48:20- Really? - Mm.

0:48:20 > 0:48:23- Easiest breakfast I'll ever have. - Confident?

0:48:23 > 0:48:25Hungry.

0:48:29 > 0:48:30We were testing YOU.

0:48:32 > 0:48:33That is not funny.

0:48:33 > 0:48:35Oh, come on. I'll get you one and all.

0:48:35 > 0:48:36Maybe a pint if you're lucky.

0:48:36 > 0:48:39Do you know what? I think I'll join the others.

0:48:39 > 0:48:40Oh, come on, now!

0:48:40 > 0:48:42- Jacob! - It was funny!

0:48:42 > 0:48:44- No sense of humour. - No sense of humour.