0:00:50 > 0:00:52Come on,
0:00:52 > 0:00:54you'd better sleep it off upstairs.
0:00:54 > 0:00:56Did I do the speech?
0:00:57 > 0:01:00More of a slur than a speech, I imagine.
0:01:00 > 0:01:03Did you embarrass yourself with The Women's Institute?
0:01:03 > 0:01:05Dullards, the lot of them.
0:01:07 > 0:01:09Come on...
0:01:09 > 0:01:13I thought you were going to stay dry until you got home?
0:01:14 > 0:01:15I did stay dry.
0:01:17 > 0:01:20First a dry white wine,
0:01:20 > 0:01:22then a dry Martini.
0:01:23 > 0:01:25No, I didn't get it.
0:01:25 > 0:01:27I know, it's a shame.
0:01:28 > 0:01:29Mum, just leave it OK?
0:01:31 > 0:01:33I've got to go, I'll call you later.
0:01:49 > 0:01:51Oh, I don't...
0:01:55 > 0:01:57You haven't touched your Alka-Seltzer.
0:01:57 > 0:01:59I don't need it. That's for amateurs.
0:02:03 > 0:02:05What did you do with my Duty Frees?
0:02:05 > 0:02:08You smoked them all.
0:02:08 > 0:02:09Really?
0:02:09 > 0:02:12Better get myself back on a plane pronto.
0:02:13 > 0:02:14What am I?
0:02:14 > 0:02:17- A gerbil?- We're out of bacon. It'll do you good.
0:02:17 > 0:02:19I feel like I've woken up in The Betty Ford Center.
0:02:19 > 0:02:22Remember what they told you in Harley Street?
0:02:22 > 0:02:23Detox or die.
0:02:24 > 0:02:27Fix me up a Martini, would you?
0:02:27 > 0:02:30- Just to take the edge off. - Just...
0:02:30 > 0:02:32eat your muesli.
0:02:41 > 0:02:42Ah, just the man.
0:02:42 > 0:02:45Could you be primed to cover Doctor Preston's first appointments?
0:02:45 > 0:02:47- There's no sign of her yet.- Right?
0:02:47 > 0:02:50So much for your reliable old trout.
0:02:50 > 0:02:52More of a freshwater salmon, actually.
0:02:52 > 0:02:53Well, on a good day.
0:02:54 > 0:02:58Oh, hello. C-Can we help, Mrs Tembe?
0:02:58 > 0:02:59This is Doctor Reid.
0:03:00 > 0:03:03- The locum. - Oh, Doctor Reid. Yes, of course.
0:03:03 > 0:03:06Sorry I'm late, I had an argument with my Sat Nav.
0:03:06 > 0:03:09Are you late? We hadn't noticed.
0:03:09 > 0:03:11The kettle's boiled. Can we get you something?
0:03:11 > 0:03:13- Thank you, I'd love a cup of tea. - Mrs Tembe?
0:03:18 > 0:03:20Howard Bellamy, Practice Manager.
0:03:20 > 0:03:22Nice to meet you.
0:03:24 > 0:03:25Were you expecting someone else?
0:03:25 > 0:03:28No. Well sort of, yes.
0:03:28 > 0:03:30Doctor Preston is under the weather.
0:03:30 > 0:03:32I thought the agency would've let you know?
0:03:32 > 0:03:34Very good of you to step in at the eleventh hour.
0:03:34 > 0:03:37Could we have a moment?
0:03:37 > 0:03:38Of course.
0:03:40 > 0:03:41Quick word?
0:03:49 > 0:03:52Aaaargh!
0:03:59 > 0:04:00What is it now?
0:04:01 > 0:04:04I'm dead. Dead!
0:04:04 > 0:04:07Nearly, the way you're going. Just go back to sleep.
0:04:07 > 0:04:09It's here in black and white.
0:04:09 > 0:04:11What are you talking about?
0:04:12 > 0:04:14My obituary.
0:04:14 > 0:04:16They've printed my obituary!
0:04:16 > 0:04:17You're still drunk.
0:04:21 > 0:04:25"Anne McAllistair, journalist and broadcaster -
0:04:25 > 0:04:27"born 3rd April, 1946.
0:04:27 > 0:04:29"Died 1st October, 2012."
0:04:30 > 0:04:32That was yesterday.
0:04:32 > 0:04:35Yes. I can't have died yesterday.
0:04:35 > 0:04:36I was at The Women's Institute.
0:04:36 > 0:04:39Must be some sort of clerical error.
0:04:41 > 0:04:44The nerve of those two-bit hacks.
0:04:44 > 0:04:48Let's see how they like being sued by a corpse.
0:04:52 > 0:04:54I just don't think she's right.
0:04:54 > 0:04:57I think we should get the agency to send a better-qualified replacement.
0:04:57 > 0:05:00She is eminently qualified - a police surgeon to boot.
0:05:00 > 0:05:02Her references are impeccable.
0:05:02 > 0:05:05And she's a lot easier on the eye than Doctor Preston.
0:05:05 > 0:05:06It's not that kind of agency, Heston.
0:05:06 > 0:05:09We can't send her home for being too attractive?
0:05:09 > 0:05:11Call it a hunch, I just don't think she's right.
0:05:11 > 0:05:13After the Elaine debacle,
0:05:13 > 0:05:16your handling of staff matters doesn't inspire confidence.
0:05:16 > 0:05:18At any rate, it's only temporary.
0:05:21 > 0:05:23"Cirrhosis."
0:05:24 > 0:05:25How dare they?
0:05:27 > 0:05:29Maybe it's someone's idea of a joke.
0:05:29 > 0:05:30Your old squash partner.
0:05:31 > 0:05:32Wendy?
0:05:32 > 0:05:34Even the name makes me wretch.
0:05:34 > 0:05:37Come on, Anne, you can't blame her for everything.
0:05:37 > 0:05:39Who else do I know that works at The Gazette?
0:05:39 > 0:05:41Vindictive cow.
0:05:41 > 0:05:43Let's not rush to any rash conclusions.
0:05:43 > 0:05:47You can't blame Wendy without even looking into the whole thing!
0:05:47 > 0:05:52There you go again - always leaping to her defence!
0:05:52 > 0:05:53In spite of the blindingly obvious.
0:05:53 > 0:05:56I suppose it is a bit of a coincidence.
0:05:56 > 0:05:59Well, there's only one way to find out.
0:06:00 > 0:06:02Why don't you ask her?
0:06:02 > 0:06:05Forget it.
0:06:05 > 0:06:07Then I guess you'll never really know.
0:06:07 > 0:06:09Will you?
0:06:12 > 0:06:13Higher?
0:06:13 > 0:06:16No, a little lower, I think.
0:06:16 > 0:06:17How's that?
0:06:17 > 0:06:18Spot on.
0:06:18 > 0:06:21Sorry, am I interrupting?
0:06:21 > 0:06:23Jas, this is our new locum, Emma.
0:06:25 > 0:06:27- Hi.- Hello.
0:06:27 > 0:06:28I think there's been a mix-up.
0:06:28 > 0:06:31I was under the impression I was working from this office.
0:06:31 > 0:06:32Oh, well...
0:06:32 > 0:06:34It makes no odds to me.
0:06:34 > 0:06:36I can work from the stationary cupboard if I have to.
0:06:36 > 0:06:38No, no - Zara's room is free.
0:06:38 > 0:06:40Why don't I work from there?
0:06:40 > 0:06:44- Sounds good to me.- As you're ergonomically suited to this office,
0:06:44 > 0:06:46it seems a bit silly to play musical chairs.
0:06:47 > 0:06:50Right. I'll work from there, shall I?
0:06:53 > 0:06:55WHIRRING PHONE RINGS
0:06:59 > 0:07:00Wendy Barron.
0:07:00 > 0:07:03You'd better get on to your lawyers.
0:07:03 > 0:07:06I'm going to sue your half-arsed rag into oblivion.
0:07:06 > 0:07:09I'd better pass you onto my PA.
0:07:09 > 0:07:11He deals with deranged members of the public.
0:07:11 > 0:07:14It's Anne, remember me?
0:07:14 > 0:07:19Your so-called newspaper printed my obituary this morning.
0:07:19 > 0:07:23I've got news for you - I'm alive and a kicking!
0:07:23 > 0:07:26I must admit, you do SOUND a bit like Anne.
0:07:26 > 0:07:28It's not a bad impersonation.
0:07:28 > 0:07:34That's because I'm impersonating myself. It's me, you imbecile.
0:07:34 > 0:07:36If you really are who you say you are,
0:07:36 > 0:07:41then you'll need to provide us with some reliable documentation.
0:07:41 > 0:07:43What?
0:07:43 > 0:07:47Just get a qualified doctor to confirm that you are Anne Barron
0:07:47 > 0:07:50and that you are still alive.
0:07:50 > 0:07:52They should be able to provide you with some sort of
0:07:52 > 0:07:54"not dead certificate."
0:07:54 > 0:07:56"A not-dead certificate?"
0:07:56 > 0:07:59Are you completely insane?
0:07:59 > 0:08:02Leave it with my PA and if it checks out,
0:08:02 > 0:08:05we may be able to print a retraction next week.
0:08:05 > 0:08:07That's the best I can do. Bye.
0:08:09 > 0:08:11DISCONNECTED TONE
0:08:11 > 0:08:13What did she say?
0:08:13 > 0:08:15Get me an appointment at The Mill.
0:08:18 > 0:08:20Brown, Bulloch...
0:08:20 > 0:08:22The "B's" are in the next row.
0:08:22 > 0:08:24Oh!
0:08:24 > 0:08:25Got it.
0:08:25 > 0:08:28Thank you. Sorry, I'm still getting my bearings.
0:08:28 > 0:08:31Well, if you need me to show you anything, just holler.
0:08:31 > 0:08:33Hmm, best offer I've had all day.
0:08:37 > 0:08:40- Ah, I've been looking for you actually.- Oh?
0:08:40 > 0:08:41Could I have a quiet word?
0:08:41 > 0:08:43Yes, of course. I'm just with a patient now.
0:08:43 > 0:08:45So some time this afternoon?
0:08:57 > 0:08:59Why don't you just tell her there's been a mistake?
0:08:59 > 0:09:02You think I haven't tried that?
0:09:02 > 0:09:04This woman is an idiot.
0:09:04 > 0:09:07I need some official corroboration.
0:09:07 > 0:09:10Sorry, but I think this is a bit beyond my remit.
0:09:10 > 0:09:12If you won't phone her,
0:09:12 > 0:09:16I have to have some sort of "not dead" certificate.
0:09:16 > 0:09:19Ludicrous I know but just give me something -
0:09:19 > 0:09:22ANYTHING to show that I'm not dead.
0:09:22 > 0:09:23Look, I'm fighting fit
0:09:23 > 0:09:27and I need you to prove that these lies about my health are nonsense,
0:09:27 > 0:09:31then I can sue her to the back of beyond.
0:09:31 > 0:09:32"Fighting fit?"
0:09:32 > 0:09:35You've missed your last two health checks.
0:09:35 > 0:09:37Are you still suffering from abdominal pains?
0:09:37 > 0:09:40I don't want a full MOT, just the damn certificate.
0:09:42 > 0:09:44Maybe it's a wake-up call.
0:09:44 > 0:09:47How many units do you drink in an average week?
0:09:47 > 0:09:49I lose count after the first 100.
0:09:49 > 0:09:50What about your family?
0:09:50 > 0:09:54I don't have any family - only Jeff, my husband.
0:09:54 > 0:09:56And he'll be pleased to see the back of me.
0:09:56 > 0:09:57Surely not.
0:09:57 > 0:10:00He's still fit, healthy, he'll find someone else.
0:10:00 > 0:10:02Good luck to him.
0:10:02 > 0:10:06But if he ends up with Wendy, I'll be spinning in my grave.
0:10:06 > 0:10:08Wendy Barron?
0:10:12 > 0:10:14- Are we finished?- If you won't give me that certificate,
0:10:14 > 0:10:17- then I'm wasting my time. - Maybe I can write you a note.
0:10:20 > 0:10:23Barron is your maiden name, right?
0:10:25 > 0:10:27Yes.
0:10:27 > 0:10:30Written off as dead...
0:10:30 > 0:10:32by my own wretched sister.
0:10:33 > 0:10:36The seared scallops with balsamic strawberries will have you
0:10:36 > 0:10:38drooling over your plate.
0:10:38 > 0:10:40Sounds divine and I do like a scallop.
0:10:40 > 0:10:44I had heard that you were something of a bon viveur.
0:10:44 > 0:10:47- From whom?- I think we have friends in common, from your days at St Phil's.
0:10:47 > 0:10:49Ravi Choudhry?
0:10:49 > 0:10:51Yes, of course, he's a very fine surgeon.
0:10:54 > 0:10:55PHONE RINGS
0:11:01 > 0:11:04Incredible. You're still with us.
0:11:05 > 0:11:07Though you do look like death.
0:11:08 > 0:11:10You've had botox, haven't you?
0:11:10 > 0:11:12Or have you just forgotten how to frown?
0:11:12 > 0:11:16Well, no-one could accuse YOU of visiting a beauty spa.
0:11:16 > 0:11:19You know, facial hair removal's come on by leaps and bounds
0:11:19 > 0:11:21in the last few years.
0:11:23 > 0:11:26Is it safe for you to remain upright?
0:11:26 > 0:11:29- What's this? - A "not-dead" certificate.
0:11:29 > 0:11:33This is most irregular, my sources are normally impeccable.
0:11:33 > 0:11:36Sources? What sources? You wrote that slanderous bile.
0:11:38 > 0:11:41I suppose we might be able to find room for a footnote
0:11:41 > 0:11:42on next week's back page.
0:11:42 > 0:11:44You'll do more than that.
0:11:44 > 0:11:47A footnote is what your obituary will be.
0:11:47 > 0:11:49And I'll be the one to write it.
0:11:49 > 0:11:53"Anne Barron's infinitely less talented sister,
0:11:53 > 0:11:56"who wrote for a number of national tabloids,
0:11:56 > 0:12:00"before accepting her true vocation -
0:12:00 > 0:12:02"caretaker of a crummy, local rag."
0:12:03 > 0:12:07Much as I'm enjoying this little reunion, SOME of us have work to do.
0:12:07 > 0:12:10- Raiph will show you out. - I'm not going anywhere.
0:12:10 > 0:12:14Not until you agree to a full-page spread in next week's edition.
0:12:14 > 0:12:16I'd hate to tempt providence.
0:12:16 > 0:12:18You could expire at any moment.
0:12:18 > 0:12:22The article must acknowledge the editor's wilful slander
0:12:22 > 0:12:28and pay tribute to my trailblazing career on Fleet Street.
0:12:28 > 0:12:31I'll have final approval, of course.
0:12:31 > 0:12:34In fact, I'd better write it myself.
0:12:34 > 0:12:38How about we settle this in the old-fashioned way?
0:12:39 > 0:12:43A sporting challenge should sort the living from the dead.
0:12:43 > 0:12:45- Grow up.- No, you need to prove you've still got a pulse.
0:12:45 > 0:12:48- How about a round of golf? - Forget it!
0:12:48 > 0:12:51Tennis then? No!
0:12:51 > 0:12:53- Squash! - Don't be so absurd!
0:12:53 > 0:12:55I haven't played squash since...
0:12:55 > 0:12:58Since I trounced you in that NUJ charity match?
0:12:58 > 0:13:01That was a fix, you slept with the referee.
0:13:03 > 0:13:05Well then a rematch is long overdue.
0:13:05 > 0:13:08If you win, I agree to your terms.
0:13:08 > 0:13:12If I win - no retraction.
0:13:12 > 0:13:14You'll just have to take your published death on the chin.
0:13:14 > 0:13:19You may enjoy flailing about like a demented orang-utan,
0:13:19 > 0:13:22but I'm happy to grow old gracefully.
0:13:22 > 0:13:24What and drink yourself even more stupid?
0:13:26 > 0:13:30Oh, it's such a shame you hung up your racquet.
0:13:30 > 0:13:34Your husband's got quite a decent stroke.
0:13:34 > 0:13:36Why, you rotten...
0:13:37 > 0:13:40OK, you're on.
0:13:42 > 0:13:45I should never have let her out of my sight.
0:13:45 > 0:13:47She's probably gone on another bender.
0:13:47 > 0:13:49I appreciate your concern, Mr McAllistair,
0:13:49 > 0:13:52but I really can't discuss your wife's problems -
0:13:52 > 0:13:53medical or otherwise.
0:13:53 > 0:13:57Yes, I know that, it's only I thought she might listen to you.
0:13:57 > 0:14:01Anne strikes me as a very headstrong woman.
0:14:01 > 0:14:02And then some.
0:14:03 > 0:14:06Whatever I say or do only seems to make matters worse.
0:14:06 > 0:14:08Isn't there someone else who could talk to her?
0:14:08 > 0:14:09Someone she'd take notice of?
0:14:09 > 0:14:12There's only one person Anne really listens to
0:14:12 > 0:14:16and they're not on speaking terms.
0:14:26 > 0:14:28First game to me.
0:14:28 > 0:14:31Do you really think you can take this to five games?
0:14:31 > 0:14:33There's a good chance you'll be dead by two.
0:14:33 > 0:14:36Of course. Just warming up.
0:14:41 > 0:14:42What do you want to know?
0:14:42 > 0:14:45Just wondered what men like women to say, you know,
0:14:45 > 0:14:47to get them in the mood.
0:14:47 > 0:14:49What does it for the average guy?
0:14:49 > 0:14:52"See you upstairs, after Match of the Day."
0:14:52 > 0:14:54I wouldn't know. I'm not your average guy.
0:14:54 > 0:14:58OK, then, tell me what turns you on.
0:14:58 > 0:15:01So you've reached 30 without knowing how to turn a man on?
0:15:01 > 0:15:03THAT would explain why you're single.
0:15:15 > 0:15:18I thought you might at least have put up a fight.
0:15:18 > 0:15:21But then beneath all the bluster, you always were a lightweight.
0:15:21 > 0:15:24A lightweight - me?
0:15:24 > 0:15:25That's rich.
0:15:25 > 0:15:28Do you remember your first day at The Express?
0:15:28 > 0:15:32Weren't quite ready to drink with the grown-ups, were you?
0:15:32 > 0:15:36Threw up all over your best Biba, and I had to take you home to Mummy.
0:15:36 > 0:15:39Trust you to brag about boozing.
0:15:39 > 0:15:42Your one talent - pickling your liver with impunity.
0:15:44 > 0:15:46"Columnist of the Year", three years running.
0:15:46 > 0:15:50Jog my memory what awards did you win?
0:15:54 > 0:15:55KNOCK AT DOOR
0:15:55 > 0:15:57Come in.
0:15:57 > 0:16:00Oh, sorry, I was just looking for some medical gloves.
0:16:00 > 0:16:02Should be some in there.
0:16:02 > 0:16:03Thanks.
0:16:09 > 0:16:10Enjoying some downtime?
0:16:11 > 0:16:14Yeah, just a bit of research.
0:16:14 > 0:16:17- A friend of mine used to do that.- What?
0:16:17 > 0:16:20Phone sex - a nice little sideline.
0:16:20 > 0:16:23- Helps pay for the childcare. - Really?
0:16:23 > 0:16:25Hmmm, she says "It's money for old rope."
0:16:25 > 0:16:27And she used to get the ironing done at the same time.
0:16:35 > 0:16:38One game all, if I'm not mistaken.
0:16:38 > 0:16:41Just letting you back into the match.
0:16:41 > 0:16:43Now I'm taking off the kid gloves.
0:16:44 > 0:16:47- So, why did you write it?- Hmm?
0:16:47 > 0:16:49The obituary.
0:16:49 > 0:16:51Never said I did.
0:17:01 > 0:17:03Top marks for effort.
0:17:03 > 0:17:04Life in the old girl yet!
0:17:09 > 0:17:10Anne?
0:17:14 > 0:17:15Anne?
0:17:17 > 0:17:18Annie?
0:17:18 > 0:17:21Sorry if I was a bit short earlier - bad morning.
0:17:21 > 0:17:23Hey, we all have them.
0:17:23 > 0:17:25My family head for the nearest bunker
0:17:25 > 0:17:28- when I get out of bed the wrong side.- Have you got kids?
0:17:28 > 0:17:32Just a son - Chris. All grown up now, finished his studies.
0:17:32 > 0:17:35- You don't seem old enough. - Well I had him young.
0:17:35 > 0:17:37Didn't train until after he was born.
0:17:37 > 0:17:39It was a struggle.
0:17:39 > 0:17:43Mind you, I think it's much tougher for young people now.
0:17:43 > 0:17:45Not enough jobs and then all that student debt to pay off.
0:17:45 > 0:17:47Tell me about it.
0:17:47 > 0:17:49Five years of medical school for this.
0:17:49 > 0:17:53I need some extra cash but I don't know if I could resort to that.
0:17:53 > 0:17:55It seems like borderline prostitution.
0:17:55 > 0:17:58What are you prostituting?
0:17:58 > 0:18:00Your voice?
0:18:00 > 0:18:02Look, most men are pretty straight forward.
0:18:02 > 0:18:05It doesn't take much to get their rocks off.
0:18:05 > 0:18:08I suppose you could see it as some sort of role-playing exercise.
0:18:08 > 0:18:09Exactly.
0:18:09 > 0:18:11One minute you're a virginal milk maid...
0:18:11 > 0:18:12KNOCK AT DOOR
0:18:12 > 0:18:15..and the next you're some leather-clad sex goddess.
0:18:15 > 0:18:16Hello.
0:18:17 > 0:18:20I see you two are getting to know each other?
0:18:29 > 0:18:33The blood tests indicate some abnormal liver functions.
0:18:34 > 0:18:35The damage may be reversible
0:18:35 > 0:18:38but ONLY if you embrace a major lifestyle change.
0:18:38 > 0:18:41Give it a rest, Doctor.
0:18:41 > 0:18:43It'll take more than a dizzy spell to turn me
0:18:43 > 0:18:45into some dreary teetotaller.
0:18:45 > 0:18:48A healthy diet, strictly no alcohol or cigarettes.
0:18:48 > 0:18:50And sensible exercise -
0:18:50 > 0:18:52don't go throwing yourself about like a Williams sister.
0:18:52 > 0:18:54This is all your fault.
0:18:54 > 0:18:56We could've settled this back at the office,
0:18:56 > 0:19:01but oh, no - you had to turn it into the Olympic Games.
0:19:01 > 0:19:03Of course, I'm to blame for everything, aren't I?
0:19:03 > 0:19:06Your 50 years of boozing - THAT must be my fault too.
0:19:06 > 0:19:07Come on, ladies.
0:19:07 > 0:19:10She always resented my success.
0:19:10 > 0:19:13But to kill me off in print, that's a new low,
0:19:13 > 0:19:15even by her depraved standards.
0:19:15 > 0:19:18I...didn't...write it!
0:19:18 > 0:19:21You expect me to believe that?
0:19:22 > 0:19:24If you didn't write it, who did?
0:19:27 > 0:19:28He did.
0:19:29 > 0:19:32- What?- It's true.
0:19:39 > 0:19:41Caught you at last.
0:19:41 > 0:19:43- Are we playing chase?- Emma...
0:19:43 > 0:19:44What?
0:19:45 > 0:19:47Yes?
0:19:50 > 0:19:52I don't think it's a good idea.
0:19:52 > 0:19:54Sorry, you've lost me.
0:19:54 > 0:19:55Emma...
0:19:57 > 0:19:58Oh, that.
0:20:04 > 0:20:06Ancient history.
0:20:06 > 0:20:07Even so...
0:20:08 > 0:20:12..it just feels messy, unprofessional.
0:20:12 > 0:20:15I think it best if you cut short your locum engagement.
0:20:18 > 0:20:20You put him up to this, didn't you?
0:20:20 > 0:20:23- Why would I do that? - You thought it would kill me off.
0:20:23 > 0:20:25It was my idea, Anne.
0:20:25 > 0:20:27A lousy idea, as it turns out.
0:20:27 > 0:20:29But I take the credit, all the same.
0:20:29 > 0:20:33No. This is much too audacious for you.
0:20:34 > 0:20:36How did you get The Gazette to play ball?
0:20:37 > 0:20:40Wendy agreed to publish the obituary.
0:20:40 > 0:20:42So, you planned it together?
0:20:42 > 0:20:43I knew it.
0:20:43 > 0:20:44SHE CHUCKLES
0:20:44 > 0:20:48Well, if it's my pension you're after, you can forget it.
0:20:48 > 0:20:50- I'll be filing for a divorce! - Why don't you ever listen?
0:20:52 > 0:20:55Why don't we leave them to it, eh?
0:21:04 > 0:21:07In the early days, our rivalry was a cause celebre.
0:21:07 > 0:21:12She'd lambast me in her column, I'd retaliate in mine.
0:21:12 > 0:21:15Then it kind of took on a life of its own.
0:21:15 > 0:21:18The public, the editors - that's all they wanted.
0:21:18 > 0:21:21I just saw it as a pantomime.
0:21:21 > 0:21:24But Anne took it more seriously?
0:21:24 > 0:21:25Yeah, I think so.
0:21:27 > 0:21:30But we only stopped talking once she'd retired.
0:21:30 > 0:21:31How come?
0:21:32 > 0:21:35One night, this was a few years back,
0:21:35 > 0:21:37I invited Jeff for a game of squash.
0:21:38 > 0:21:41Anne got wind of it, and hit the roof.
0:21:41 > 0:21:45She thought it was my seduction technique!
0:21:45 > 0:21:46I don't even fancy him(!)
0:21:46 > 0:21:49Didn't you try to put her mind at rest?
0:21:49 > 0:21:51Oh, Jeff did until he was blue in the face.
0:21:51 > 0:21:53The booze has made her paranoid.
0:21:53 > 0:21:57Until today, we hadn't even spoken in three years.
0:21:57 > 0:21:59That's a long time to waste on a misunderstanding.
0:21:59 > 0:22:02Well, if Anne was still working,
0:22:02 > 0:22:04she'd have probably written a funny article about it
0:22:04 > 0:22:06and the whole thing would've blown over.
0:22:06 > 0:22:09But NOW, she doesn't have that.
0:22:09 > 0:22:11All she has is the drink...
0:22:11 > 0:22:13and Jeff.
0:22:13 > 0:22:16Leave it another three years and you might not get another chance...
0:22:17 > 0:22:19..to bury the hatchet.
0:22:19 > 0:22:21Her health is precarious.
0:22:21 > 0:22:26But if someone can convince her to stop drinking then...
0:22:26 > 0:22:29maybe she'll prove your newspaper wrong.
0:22:31 > 0:22:35I knew that you'd blame Wendy for the obituary.
0:22:35 > 0:22:37And I figured it might get you talking again.
0:22:38 > 0:22:41We've always had a combative relationship.
0:22:42 > 0:22:44Just because my liver's on the brink,
0:22:44 > 0:22:47it's not going to be all hugs and kisses.
0:22:47 > 0:22:51No, you'll carry on as you always have - at each other's throats.
0:22:51 > 0:22:53But maybe you need that.
0:22:53 > 0:22:56You need your old sparring partner.
0:22:56 > 0:22:58Whatever I say or do makes little difference.
0:22:58 > 0:23:01But in spite of all the rancour,
0:23:01 > 0:23:03I always thought you valued Wendy's opinion.
0:23:04 > 0:23:07Oh... Come to stick the boot in, have you?
0:23:07 > 0:23:11This isn't some sort of sinister conspiracy, Anne.
0:23:11 > 0:23:13No?
0:23:13 > 0:23:15What is it, then?
0:23:15 > 0:23:19We thought that the obituary might shock you into sobriety.
0:23:20 > 0:23:24Joking, aren't you? If ever I needed a drink.
0:23:24 > 0:23:28Well, despite what you think, your drinking is a big worry.
0:23:28 > 0:23:33For me, for your friends and most of all, for Jeff.
0:23:33 > 0:23:38Well, a fake obituary isn't going to throw me on the wagon.
0:23:39 > 0:23:42Doctor Tyler recommended someone.
0:23:42 > 0:23:45Why don't we fix you up with an appointment?
0:23:45 > 0:23:46No way.
0:23:47 > 0:23:50I can't see me fitting in with the Temperance Society.
0:23:50 > 0:23:53There's no reasoning with you, is there?
0:23:53 > 0:23:55You're beyond reason.
0:23:55 > 0:23:57The only thing you care about is the next bloody drink.
0:23:57 > 0:24:01Everything else is just collateral damage.
0:24:03 > 0:24:07If you want to drink yourself into an early grave, so be it.
0:24:07 > 0:24:10Just don't expect me to stand by and watch.
0:24:18 > 0:24:19I would hate to renege on a work commitment.
0:24:19 > 0:24:21That really would be unprofessional.
0:24:21 > 0:24:22Not at all.
0:24:22 > 0:24:24I'll just inform the agency
0:24:24 > 0:24:26that it's a shorter contract than expected.
0:24:26 > 0:24:29Well, I've already signed, you'd have to pay me anyway.
0:24:30 > 0:24:32Howard, I'm sure that neither of us
0:24:32 > 0:24:35would allow a little skirmish to get in the way of our jobs.
0:24:35 > 0:24:36A skirmish?
0:24:36 > 0:24:39Oh, come on, we can work together, can't we?
0:24:39 > 0:24:42Who knows, might even have some fun.
0:24:42 > 0:24:44You've got a great little team here.
0:24:44 > 0:24:47I already feel like I've made a few friends.
0:24:47 > 0:24:50Don't get too comfortable. It's not for too long.
0:24:50 > 0:24:52I know.
0:24:52 > 0:24:56Better make the make the most of it then, hadn't I?
0:24:56 > 0:24:57Good night.
0:25:01 > 0:25:02Why do you drink?
0:25:03 > 0:25:05Why does anybody drink?
0:25:06 > 0:25:08I enjoy it.
0:25:08 > 0:25:12No, you always enjoyed a tipple, but not like this.
0:25:12 > 0:25:14- You drink because you're bored. - What?
0:25:14 > 0:25:19- How about a lead article in The Gazette?- Oh, God...
0:25:20 > 0:25:24Political opinion, local gossip,
0:25:24 > 0:25:28maybe the occasional interview with your more talented, older sister.
0:25:29 > 0:25:32And a chance to write my own obituary?
0:25:32 > 0:25:33Of course.
0:25:37 > 0:25:39Jeff loves you, Anne.
0:25:39 > 0:25:43If he didn't, he wouldn't have gone to these ridiculous lengths.
0:25:43 > 0:25:45Hmm.
0:25:47 > 0:25:49I don't know why he puts up with me.
0:25:49 > 0:25:53Maybe it's because he remembers what you're really like,
0:25:53 > 0:25:54without the booze.
0:25:57 > 0:26:02And maybe he believes that you can change, even when you don't.
0:26:09 > 0:26:11CAR ALARM BEEPS
0:26:11 > 0:26:12Emma...
0:26:13 > 0:26:15Pleasant first day, I hope?
0:26:15 > 0:26:16Nothing I couldn't handle.
0:26:16 > 0:26:18The Mill has its idiosyncrasies.
0:26:18 > 0:26:21But when you have an hour or two, I could give you a few pointers.
0:26:21 > 0:26:25- Pointers?- Yes, some friendly advice over supper?
0:26:25 > 0:26:27Or lunch?
0:26:27 > 0:26:30You're very sweet. But perhaps I should've explained.
0:26:30 > 0:26:32I don't wear my wedding ring at work,
0:26:32 > 0:26:34purely for health and safety reasons.
0:26:35 > 0:26:37Oh! I see.
0:26:37 > 0:26:39But we should still do lunch.
0:26:39 > 0:26:41I'd love to get to know everyone better.
0:26:41 > 0:26:43I'll see you tomorrow.
0:26:43 > 0:26:44Good night.
0:26:57 > 0:27:00Hey, babes, have a guess what I'm wearing?
0:27:00 > 0:27:02Come on, Jim, don't be such a sap.
0:27:02 > 0:27:04All you have to do is sign the form.
0:27:04 > 0:27:06I can't, you know I can't, I have to say no.
0:27:06 > 0:27:08The lads play jokes all the time.
0:27:10 > 0:27:12You need to tell the police about this.
0:27:12 > 0:27:13No.
0:27:13 > 0:27:15Us trying for a baby?
0:27:15 > 0:27:18Daniel being in bed with us isn't the best thing, is it?
0:27:22 > 0:27:24Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd