0:00:59 > 0:01:01This isn't my jam.
0:01:01 > 0:01:04I know. We've run out of strawberry.
0:01:04 > 0:01:10- We never run out.- Not usually, no but I forgot we were so low. Luke?
0:01:10 > 0:01:11I don't want this jam.
0:01:11 > 0:01:14Yes, I know. Just give me five minutes.
0:01:14 > 0:01:18Tell you what, I'll nip to the shop and get you some strawberry.
0:01:20 > 0:01:22Then we can have breakfast all over again.
0:01:22 > 0:01:27- Start from the beginning, OK? - Don't forget, Mum. Strawberry.
0:01:27 > 0:01:28The rest are rubbish.
0:01:32 > 0:01:33OPERA MUSIC PLAYS
0:01:52 > 0:01:53Hello.
0:01:55 > 0:01:56Hi, it's only me.
0:01:58 > 0:02:00I'll be in a minute.
0:02:02 > 0:02:05"Dying alone like that.
0:02:05 > 0:02:11"It's really sad." "No, Evelyn. It's just careless.
0:02:12 > 0:02:15"Everybody should have someone."
0:02:15 > 0:02:17I'm back now.
0:02:19 > 0:02:20Luke!
0:02:21 > 0:02:23Shall we start breakfast again?
0:02:23 > 0:02:26I'm not hungry.
0:02:26 > 0:02:28Why don't you give the TV a break?
0:02:28 > 0:02:30I'm busy, Mum.
0:02:30 > 0:02:31You could read that book you like?
0:02:31 > 0:02:33Or we could go out. What do you think?
0:02:33 > 0:02:38"I was age five when I decided to become a doctor."
0:02:41 > 0:02:43Hi.
0:02:43 > 0:02:44How are you feeling?
0:02:48 > 0:02:50Looks OK.
0:02:54 > 0:02:57It's good to see you.
0:03:00 > 0:03:03- That dramatic exit the other...- Sh!
0:03:03 > 0:03:05Doesn't matter. I'm just glad you're here.
0:03:13 > 0:03:16I'm sure Gordon doesn't need to know all the gory details.
0:03:16 > 0:03:19If I'm registering, I might as well know what I'm getting into.
0:03:19 > 0:03:22And watch out for my fellow receptionist.
0:03:22 > 0:03:25She's a bit of a pain in the proverbial but her bark's worse than her bite.
0:03:25 > 0:03:26Morning!
0:03:29 > 0:03:32Mrs Tembe. What a lovely surprise!
0:03:32 > 0:03:35Oh... You know each other?
0:03:35 > 0:03:37She's my Good Samaritan.
0:03:37 > 0:03:38No, no.
0:03:38 > 0:03:40Tell them what you did.
0:03:40 > 0:03:41Go on. We're all ears!
0:03:41 > 0:03:43Come on... out with it!
0:03:44 > 0:03:47The church ladies and I had made preparations -
0:03:47 > 0:03:50we were expecting Reverend Clement at any moment.
0:03:51 > 0:03:54Then a homeless man appeared.
0:03:54 > 0:03:57It was a very difficult situation.
0:03:57 > 0:04:00What she's trying to say, very nicely,
0:04:00 > 0:04:02is that they wanted to send him packing!
0:04:02 > 0:04:04No. Not...
0:04:04 > 0:04:05Yes, well, perhaps.
0:04:07 > 0:04:10I did not think it was a good idea, so I made him a cup of tea.
0:04:10 > 0:04:11Very nice it was, too.
0:04:12 > 0:04:16Hang on, I'm confused, who's the tramp?
0:04:16 > 0:04:17You?
0:04:17 > 0:04:19Most unconventional.
0:04:19 > 0:04:21You were testing them?
0:04:21 > 0:04:23I just wanted to see the place as an outsider,
0:04:23 > 0:04:26not your typical middle-class churchgoer.
0:04:26 > 0:04:29I love it. Nice story. Well done, Mrs T.
0:04:29 > 0:04:32Right, well. Will you give him a registration form?
0:04:32 > 0:04:33I'll put the kettle on.
0:04:33 > 0:04:35Got any hobnobs?
0:04:35 > 0:04:38Luke.
0:04:38 > 0:04:39Luke!
0:04:42 > 0:04:45The blood in the toilet, where's it come from?
0:04:45 > 0:04:47- Have you hurt yourself? - Hurts, yeah.
0:04:47 > 0:04:50Where does it hurt? Show me!
0:04:51 > 0:04:54It hurt when I wee'd. My stomach's bad, too.
0:04:54 > 0:04:57- I don't feel well. - OK, it's OK. I'll call a doctor.
0:04:59 > 0:05:02Now then, exercise... hmmm.
0:05:02 > 0:05:05You do not find the time?
0:05:05 > 0:05:09There was I thinking I was a fine figure of a man!
0:05:11 > 0:05:16What about here? It's asking me to specify a primary doctor?
0:05:16 > 0:05:22Now, I would strongly recommend Doctor Heston Carter.
0:05:22 > 0:05:24Karen mentioned Jimmi?
0:05:24 > 0:05:28Good, but not as robust as Doctor Carter.
0:05:28 > 0:05:29Why don't we hold off a moment?
0:05:30 > 0:05:33I was hoping I'd run into you.
0:05:33 > 0:05:36I'd like your help with something, if you have the time?
0:05:36 > 0:05:40- Really?- I'm thinking about making a few changes at St Bernadette's.
0:05:40 > 0:05:42Changes?
0:05:42 > 0:05:45I want to encourage new people to come to church.
0:05:45 > 0:05:47How does that sound?
0:05:47 > 0:05:51- I am not sure... - Let's get our heads together soon, bounce around some ideas.
0:05:56 > 0:06:01You know, I'm not complaining, but shouldn't you be at work?
0:06:01 > 0:06:04I've taken the day off, so we can talk.
0:06:04 > 0:06:05OK. Good.
0:06:09 > 0:06:11Look. I'm sure we can find a way through this...
0:06:11 > 0:06:14Good. I was hoping that you'd see...
0:06:14 > 0:06:15No, I haven't changed my mind.
0:06:17 > 0:06:18I'm ready to set a date.
0:06:20 > 0:06:23I know it's a bit awkward talking about this stuff, but
0:06:23 > 0:06:25I'm just not getting a very clear picture.
0:06:26 > 0:06:30- Luke, she can't help if you keep clamming up.- All right, Mum!
0:06:30 > 0:06:32I've asked a lot of questions, I know.
0:06:32 > 0:06:35It's just that there are quite a few possible
0:06:35 > 0:06:36causes of blood in the urine.
0:06:36 > 0:06:41- Like what?- Let's find out a little bit more first. Shall we try again?
0:06:41 > 0:06:46OK, so I was asking about the pain.
0:06:46 > 0:06:49- Did you feel it before you went to the toilet?- No.
0:06:49 > 0:06:52- So it started when you urinated? - Yeah.
0:06:52 > 0:06:54Was it a burning sensation or a sharp pain?
0:06:54 > 0:06:56Pain, yeah.
0:06:56 > 0:06:58I need to know which?
0:06:58 > 0:06:59It's his echolalia.
0:06:59 > 0:07:03- Repeating what I say? - People with autistic spectrum get it when they get stressed.
0:07:03 > 0:07:06- You're best of asking him one question at a time.- Right.
0:07:08 > 0:07:13Was it a burning sensation? A sharp pain?
0:07:13 > 0:07:14Yeah.
0:07:14 > 0:07:17And did you feel it in your side? In the stomach?
0:07:17 > 0:07:19I don't know!
0:07:19 > 0:07:22He said there was. He said he felt ill!
0:07:22 > 0:07:24Right.
0:07:24 > 0:07:26So what is it? Do you know what's wrong with him?
0:07:26 > 0:07:29Not without a referral, I'm afraid.
0:07:29 > 0:07:32Luke's been to hospital several times in recent months?
0:07:32 > 0:07:35Yeah, he gets better and then there's something else. It's driving me nuts!
0:07:35 > 0:07:37I'm sure we'll get to the bottom of it.
0:07:37 > 0:07:39I'll go straight back and ring Urology.
0:07:39 > 0:07:43Given the seriousness, hopefully Luke will get an appointment today. OK?
0:07:45 > 0:07:46Is it just the two of you?
0:07:46 > 0:07:48Yep, 24/7.
0:07:48 > 0:07:52Must be quite stressful. Do you have any support?
0:07:52 > 0:07:54I got fed up explaining to stupid people,
0:07:54 > 0:07:57who couldn't accept him for who he is. He's best off with me.
0:07:57 > 0:08:00Sure. I'll let you know when I hear anything.
0:08:00 > 0:08:03Try not to worry.
0:08:03 > 0:08:06Can't you see this is a reaction to everything that's happened?
0:08:06 > 0:08:09You've had to make a total adjustment to your life.
0:08:09 > 0:08:11Emotionally you're still dealing with it. You still need time.
0:08:11 > 0:08:14Oh, come on, the great healer? I've had more than enough, trust me.
0:08:14 > 0:08:17- And this is the best you could come up with?- Em...
0:08:17 > 0:08:20I have got patients who are severely disabled,
0:08:20 > 0:08:23who are terminally ill, and they grab hold of life.
0:08:23 > 0:08:25They squeeze every last ounce of it they can.
0:08:25 > 0:08:27Good for them. Maybe they're stronger than me.
0:08:27 > 0:08:29I don't know.
0:08:29 > 0:08:31It doesn't change how I feel, does it?
0:08:31 > 0:08:35- In a month, a year - you'll probably feel totally different.- No.
0:08:39 > 0:08:40You can fight this.
0:08:40 > 0:08:42I don't want to.
0:08:42 > 0:08:48Fine. All right, let's just say, for an instant, that I do... what now?
0:08:48 > 0:08:52I book two weeks' leave from the Mill and we jet off to Disneyland?!
0:08:52 > 0:08:55Probably got great wheelchair access, but not really my style, is it?
0:08:55 > 0:08:58Well, let's get our diaries out find a window.
0:08:58 > 0:09:00Then we can plan the last few days.
0:09:00 > 0:09:03Em, Em... Stop it.
0:09:03 > 0:09:08No, I will not sign up to this insane plan of yours!
0:09:10 > 0:09:16Actually, if you do have the odd spare moment...
0:09:16 > 0:09:21I'm hoping to draw new people to St Bernadette's,
0:09:21 > 0:09:24make it a bit of a hub for the community.
0:09:25 > 0:09:30I'm chock-a-block at work at the moment. Irregular shifts.
0:09:30 > 0:09:34And I've just finished an HCA course and there's loads of homework and such...
0:09:35 > 0:09:37Well, if you change your minds.
0:09:37 > 0:09:40You might be surprised by what we've got to offer.
0:09:40 > 0:09:41Any chance of that Brian Cox?
0:09:41 > 0:09:43He's about as spiritual as I get!
0:09:45 > 0:09:48Could be a stretch! I should be getting back.
0:09:48 > 0:09:51Shall I make that appointment on my way out?
0:09:51 > 0:09:52Yeah? With Jimmi Clay?
0:09:52 > 0:09:56Mrs Tembe recommended a Doctor Carter?
0:09:57 > 0:10:01Oh, no! He's too stuffy, go with Jimmi. I'll fix it up for you.
0:10:01 > 0:10:04And I'll get you out of this maze that is called
0:10:04 > 0:10:05Letherbridge University!
0:10:09 > 0:10:12Heston. Reverend Clement.
0:10:12 > 0:10:16- Gordon.- Ah! The new shepherd of the good people of Letherbridge.
0:10:16 > 0:10:17'Dux gregis'.
0:10:17 > 0:10:20Thanks.
0:10:20 > 0:10:25Um... So Jimmi's got a slot on Thursday at 1.50.
0:10:25 > 0:10:26Great. Book me in.
0:10:28 > 0:10:33- Done.- Thanks. You'll let me know as soon as you're free?
0:10:33 > 0:10:36Er...yes. I suppose so.
0:10:38 > 0:10:39Bye.
0:10:42 > 0:10:46Did Urology ring back with an appointment for Luke Allingdon?
0:10:48 > 0:10:50What?
0:10:50 > 0:10:55Er, yes. A Doctor Cairns is seeing him at 12.30.
0:10:55 > 0:10:57- Oh.- Problem?
0:10:57 > 0:10:59I did a rotation with him at med school.
0:10:59 > 0:11:02- We didn't exactly hit it off. - Why's that?
0:11:02 > 0:11:05He didn't like being told he was wrong, especially by a student.
0:11:05 > 0:11:08I can imagine. Proud man, Cairns - but knows his stuff.
0:11:08 > 0:11:11- He's a friend of yours? - Yeah. From my old surgery days.
0:11:11 > 0:11:15I wouldn't worry, it's probably water under the bridge.
0:11:15 > 0:11:17Luke, come and sit down.
0:11:20 > 0:11:22So what do you think's wrong with him?
0:11:22 > 0:11:25He appears to have some pain in the pelvic area.
0:11:25 > 0:11:28- And in the stomach.- Luke didn't indicate that when I examined him.
0:11:28 > 0:11:31Yeah, but before, he said that's where it hurts.
0:11:33 > 0:11:35Luke, stand up, show me again where the pain is.
0:11:39 > 0:11:41Here.
0:11:41 > 0:11:44- Those are your kidneys. - He means lower down.
0:11:44 > 0:11:46It's best if Luke speaks for himself.
0:11:46 > 0:11:47Show me again?
0:11:49 > 0:11:52Could you be a little more specific?
0:11:52 > 0:11:55Doctor Diamond would know.
0:11:55 > 0:11:58Is he your family GP?
0:11:58 > 0:12:02We've been in and out of here so often, seen that many doctors lately...
0:12:02 > 0:12:05- Yes.- Why can't anybody tell me what's wrong with him?
0:12:05 > 0:12:09It's a little difficult when a patient presents with such a variety of symptoms.
0:12:09 > 0:12:13- You're not taking this seriously. - I assure you that I am.
0:12:13 > 0:12:16My problem is deciding how best to proceed.
0:12:16 > 0:12:18Our nurse tells me that the urine sample she took
0:12:18 > 0:12:21from Luke before our appointment showed no sign of blood.
0:12:21 > 0:12:24Doesn't mean it's not going to happen again.
0:12:24 > 0:12:26I prefer to see it as positive.
0:12:26 > 0:12:29Right, so that's it? You're not going to do anything?
0:12:29 > 0:12:32Actually, I've requested that Luke be admitted for the time being.
0:12:32 > 0:12:34We'll run some more tests, see how he does.
0:12:35 > 0:12:36That OK with you Luke?
0:12:38 > 0:12:40Yeah.
0:12:48 > 0:12:55How about we roll back that last conversation, start over?
0:12:58 > 0:13:00I can't think straight
0:13:00 > 0:13:03until we've cleared the air about Valentine's, and what I said.
0:13:10 > 0:13:12OK.
0:13:12 > 0:13:13I was angry...
0:13:15 > 0:13:17I shouldn't have told you like that.
0:13:17 > 0:13:19Kept me in blissful ignorance?
0:13:20 > 0:13:21Maybe.
0:13:24 > 0:13:27At least I wouldn't be worried that it would affect your decision.
0:13:31 > 0:13:32What's his name?
0:13:35 > 0:13:37Howard.
0:13:38 > 0:13:39Right.
0:13:44 > 0:13:47I've been cooped up in here all weekend.
0:13:47 > 0:13:49I could really do with some fresh air.
0:13:49 > 0:13:53What say you take me and my body out in the garden for a bit?
0:13:58 > 0:14:00She's talking to him now. I don't understand!
0:14:00 > 0:14:03Why does he need a social worker?
0:14:04 > 0:14:07No, nobody is telling me anything!
0:14:07 > 0:14:09He's the practice manager at the Mill.
0:14:12 > 0:14:13So you met recently?
0:14:16 > 0:14:17No.
0:14:19 > 0:14:21We worked together at the PCT.
0:14:24 > 0:14:26We were involved for a while and then...
0:14:30 > 0:14:31What?
0:14:35 > 0:14:41We stopped seeing each other for a bit.
0:14:41 > 0:14:42Since last January.
0:14:46 > 0:14:48When I had the accident?
0:14:51 > 0:14:53Come on.
0:14:53 > 0:14:57It's not your fault, there's no way you could have predicted...
0:14:57 > 0:15:01Why do you have to be so bloody reasonable?
0:15:01 > 0:15:02Sorry...
0:15:02 > 0:15:05Didn't you think why I was so late getting to the hospital?
0:15:10 > 0:15:13I'm sorry, that was cruel.
0:15:18 > 0:15:20Yes.
0:15:20 > 0:15:22- Sam, I...- I'd love a cup of tea.
0:15:36 > 0:15:39I've just seen Maggie Allingdon.
0:15:39 > 0:15:40And you are?
0:15:42 > 0:15:46Doctor Khella, her GP. Don't you remember me?
0:15:46 > 0:15:49I did my rotation with you in Urology.
0:15:50 > 0:15:52Ah, yes.
0:15:52 > 0:15:56No-one's telling Maggie what's going on. Why have you called Social Services?
0:15:56 > 0:15:58I've asked them to do an assessment of mother and child.
0:15:58 > 0:16:00Why? For what reason?
0:16:00 > 0:16:02As a precaution.
0:16:02 > 0:16:05There are certain issues regarding Luke's care by his mother.
0:16:05 > 0:16:07What issues?
0:16:07 > 0:16:09I'm afraid I've got a meeting.
0:16:09 > 0:16:11Rest assured, they are in expert hands.
0:16:11 > 0:16:12I referred them to you.
0:16:12 > 0:16:14If there's a problem, I'd like to know.
0:16:20 > 0:16:24I'm putting a little distance between Luke and his mother -
0:16:24 > 0:16:26see if his condition improves.
0:16:26 > 0:16:29Wait - you're suggesting this could be her fault?
0:16:29 > 0:16:31I wouldn't go as far as that.
0:16:31 > 0:16:34Perhaps she's using the situation as a cry for help.
0:16:34 > 0:16:36Munchausen's by Proxy?
0:16:36 > 0:16:38Fabricated or Induced Illness,
0:16:38 > 0:16:40as we now refer to it, is a long way down the line.
0:16:41 > 0:16:45She may not be harming Luke, just seeing problems where there are none.
0:16:45 > 0:16:47That doesn't make sense. Why would she do that?
0:16:47 > 0:16:50Stress, exhaustion...
0:16:50 > 0:16:54She's under a lot of strain, obviously... but that's because she's worried about Luke.
0:16:54 > 0:16:59I'm not in the habit of having my medical opinions questioned by junior colleagues.
0:16:59 > 0:17:02But if you insist on my spelling it out to you.
0:17:02 > 0:17:03Please do.
0:17:05 > 0:17:09Luke's been admitted to this hospital eight times in recent months.
0:17:09 > 0:17:12On each occasion he's had different symptoms.
0:17:12 > 0:17:14We've been unable to make a diagnosis despite his mother
0:17:14 > 0:17:16requesting all manner of tests.
0:17:16 > 0:17:20- Maggie didn't ask to come here today. - Yet here she is.
0:17:20 > 0:17:24And once again, her son's miraculously improved on admittance.
0:17:25 > 0:17:27There's a reason. Something missing.
0:17:28 > 0:17:30The proverbial "gut feeling"?
0:17:33 > 0:17:36I thought you'd have got past that by now, Doctor Khella.
0:17:41 > 0:17:44We always knew that we were playing with fire.
0:17:48 > 0:17:53That one day, one of these affairs might become something else.
0:17:55 > 0:18:00My relationship with Howard doesn't change things between us.
0:18:00 > 0:18:01I don't love you any less!
0:18:04 > 0:18:05Listen to me.
0:18:06 > 0:18:09In all the years we've been together, I have never,
0:18:09 > 0:18:13not once considered leaving you for anyone else.
0:18:16 > 0:18:17Not then, not now.
0:18:21 > 0:18:22But you love him?
0:18:27 > 0:18:29I love you both.
0:18:31 > 0:18:33That's why this is such a mess!
0:18:37 > 0:18:39I'm tired.
0:18:39 > 0:18:40I need to rest.
0:18:43 > 0:18:46I wouldn't mess around with that.
0:18:46 > 0:18:47What does it do?
0:18:48 > 0:18:50It administers oxygen.
0:18:50 > 0:18:52Can you give me some?
0:18:52 > 0:18:54I think the nurses would string me up.
0:18:54 > 0:18:55Tie you up?
0:18:55 > 0:18:57Get very cross with me.
0:18:58 > 0:19:01Why haven't they put me on it?
0:19:01 > 0:19:05It's generally for patients who don't have enough oxygen in their blood.
0:19:05 > 0:19:10- That's a good thing you're not on it, it probably means you're getting better.- I'm not better.
0:19:11 > 0:19:13What do you think's wrong with you?
0:19:13 > 0:19:17- He'd know. - Who? Doctor Cairns? Maybe.
0:19:19 > 0:19:20I like it here.
0:19:22 > 0:19:27The hospital? Surely you'd rather get home, see your mum?
0:19:27 > 0:19:29No, not really.
0:19:36 > 0:19:37How's Luke? Have you seen him?
0:19:37 > 0:19:39He's doing fine, much better.
0:19:39 > 0:19:41So they know what's wrong?
0:19:41 > 0:19:46- You should really speak to Doctor Cairns.- Did he tell you why he called a social worker?
0:19:46 > 0:19:48I can't get into this... I'm sorry.
0:19:48 > 0:19:52Is it something they think I've done? Is that why you're not telling me?
0:19:52 > 0:19:54- They just want to make sure Luke's OK.- What does that mean?
0:19:54 > 0:19:57- You're supposed to be here to help me, be on my side.- It's not about sides.
0:19:57 > 0:20:02Then why aren't you in there, backing me up? Telling them I've done nothing wrong!
0:20:02 > 0:20:03When I saw Luke just now, he...
0:20:04 > 0:20:07..told me he wants to stay here in the hospital.
0:20:07 > 0:20:09You're lying. He wouldn't say that!
0:20:11 > 0:20:14I love that boy more than anything in the world.
0:20:14 > 0:20:16I'm the only one who's been there for him.
0:20:16 > 0:20:19Even turned my back on my own family because they didn't understand him!
0:20:19 > 0:20:22If I thought for one second he would be better off without me,
0:20:22 > 0:20:28I'd walk away in a heartbeat. Do you understand?
0:20:29 > 0:20:34So...how well do you know Reverend Clement?
0:20:34 > 0:20:38Gordon? Me and Rob have known him for years.
0:20:38 > 0:20:39Oh.
0:20:39 > 0:20:41You two seem to have hit it off?
0:20:41 > 0:20:45He is seeking my advice on some spiritual matters.
0:20:47 > 0:20:50He is coming to me as a respectable member of the church community.
0:20:50 > 0:20:53So what's your problem?
0:20:53 > 0:20:55I am really struggling to work this man out.
0:20:55 > 0:20:58He's a straight-up guy.
0:20:58 > 0:21:01Who turns up at his new church dressed as a tramp?
0:21:01 > 0:21:03He likes to keep people on their toes.
0:21:03 > 0:21:07I do not think he will be the right fit for St Bernadette's.
0:21:07 > 0:21:09What about that WI lot you're always complaining about?
0:21:09 > 0:21:11They could do with a shake-up!
0:21:11 > 0:21:15Like them, I see church as a serious affair.
0:21:15 > 0:21:17Pantomime should be left at the theatre!
0:21:26 > 0:21:27PHONE RINGS
0:21:29 > 0:21:31Hi, Heston.
0:21:31 > 0:21:33I've just had Patrick Cairns on the phone.
0:21:33 > 0:21:38I'm afraid he finds your continuing presence there "unhelpful".
0:21:38 > 0:21:39Is everything OK?
0:21:41 > 0:21:42The honest answer?
0:21:42 > 0:21:45- I know he can be a bit of a bully. - Maybe he's right.
0:21:45 > 0:21:50Medically, no-one can find anything. All the boy's tests came back clear.
0:21:50 > 0:21:52You don't sound convinced?
0:21:52 > 0:21:54My head says one thing, but my heart...
0:21:54 > 0:21:59That disagreement you had in medical school, was he right about that, too?
0:21:59 > 0:22:00Thanks, Heston.
0:22:00 > 0:22:02Did you see him come out?
0:22:02 > 0:22:03Luke? No. What's happened?
0:22:03 > 0:22:07- They've lost him. The social worker's gone to get Security. - He must still be in the hospital.
0:22:07 > 0:22:12- Can you think of anywhere he'd go? - He's probably terrified. I've got to find him!
0:22:12 > 0:22:14Wait!
0:22:16 > 0:22:18- OK?- Yeah.
0:22:18 > 0:22:21Your catheter's leaked.
0:22:21 > 0:22:24Just leave it, Emma.
0:22:25 > 0:22:29I never answered your question.
0:22:29 > 0:22:34I made up my mind long before you told me about Howard.
0:22:34 > 0:22:36Sometime after the stroke.
0:22:39 > 0:22:42We don't know how permanent the paralysis is,
0:22:43 > 0:22:45some feeling might return.
0:22:45 > 0:22:47Let's not pretend.
0:22:47 > 0:22:51I've spoken long and hard with Heston about my prognosis,
0:22:51 > 0:22:53- I know exactly what the future holds.- He's wrong.
0:22:54 > 0:22:56Or you find the truth unpalatable?
0:22:56 > 0:22:59I know you. This isn't rational thinking.
0:23:01 > 0:23:02Can't you see this is depression?
0:23:05 > 0:23:07No, it's this.
0:23:09 > 0:23:12The reality of how I live my life.
0:23:14 > 0:23:18Your heart isn't getting enough oxygen right now.
0:23:18 > 0:23:23The myo...car...dial ischaemia's getting worse.
0:23:23 > 0:23:28We may be able to perform an angioplasty to save your heart
0:23:28 > 0:23:31but there are risks.
0:23:33 > 0:23:38Is that your diagnosis? Where did you learn all that stuff?
0:23:38 > 0:23:40From the best.
0:23:40 > 0:23:42Oh, yeah? Who's that?
0:23:42 > 0:23:44Doctor Diamond.
0:23:44 > 0:23:46- He works here?- No.
0:23:46 > 0:23:48So when did you meet him?
0:23:49 > 0:23:52How would I do that?
0:23:52 > 0:23:56I don't understand. Which hospital is he based at?
0:23:56 > 0:23:57Emergency 911.
0:23:59 > 0:24:01You OK?
0:24:01 > 0:24:03It's nothing.
0:24:03 > 0:24:09Pinch here. Lean forward, breathe through your mouth.
0:24:09 > 0:24:14Emergency 911. That's the name of a TV show, isn't it?
0:24:14 > 0:24:19Doctor Diamond's the best. Always gets the diagnosis right.
0:24:20 > 0:24:23So what would he say about you?
0:24:24 > 0:24:27Any symptoms, he knows what it is.
0:24:27 > 0:24:29Even if what you told him wasn't true?
0:24:31 > 0:24:34The blood in the toilet was from your nose wasn't it?
0:24:34 > 0:24:36Hmm.
0:24:38 > 0:24:39You're better than I thought!
0:24:43 > 0:24:45I've done a wash.
0:24:45 > 0:24:48- Sit down.- I need to change the sheets. It'll only take five minutes.
0:24:48 > 0:24:49Please. Will you just sit down.
0:24:58 > 0:25:00I don't want this to be our lives any more.
0:25:00 > 0:25:02I'm sick of you and Chris clearing up after me all the time!
0:25:02 > 0:25:07- It's second nature.- Not to me, it's not. You have no idea how humiliating it is.
0:25:07 > 0:25:10Fine - wallow in your own self-pity!
0:25:10 > 0:25:13The Sam Reid I fell in love with could talk to me
0:25:13 > 0:25:17for hours about history, charm me with romantic poetry.
0:25:17 > 0:25:20For how long? Until the next stroke?
0:25:20 > 0:25:24What matters is that you are here, now with me.
0:25:24 > 0:25:30Yeah. With no freedom and no dignity. I want my control back.
0:25:30 > 0:25:32I want to choose how and when I die.
0:25:32 > 0:25:33What about my choice?
0:25:35 > 0:25:37What about Chris?
0:25:38 > 0:25:41Have you thought exactly what you're going to say to him?
0:25:44 > 0:25:47I've wasted everybody's time.
0:25:47 > 0:25:49- The important thing is that Luke's OK.- Yeah, well.
0:25:49 > 0:25:52I should have known, should have realised what he was doing.
0:25:52 > 0:25:55It's hard to step back, when you're so close to things.
0:25:55 > 0:25:58He's always watching TV. That's what keeps me up half the night.
0:25:58 > 0:26:00Which must be exhausting for you.
0:26:00 > 0:26:03Things wouldn't have gone so far, if I'd been thinking straight.
0:26:03 > 0:26:06If there's anything else you need, just let me know.
0:26:12 > 0:26:15You must have thought about it, planned it in your head?
0:26:17 > 0:26:19How are you going to tell him?
0:26:21 > 0:26:23Over dinner, like you told me?
0:26:23 > 0:26:26Don't make this harder than it already is.
0:26:26 > 0:26:28Hard? I'll give you hard!
0:26:30 > 0:26:35You're the one who's going to have to look your son in the eye and tell him you're abandoning him!
0:26:35 > 0:26:38Explain why his feelings don't matter.
0:26:38 > 0:26:40Why destroying him doesn't matter!
0:26:40 > 0:26:44All right, that's enough. That's enough. Just stop it!
0:26:44 > 0:26:46All right, Dad!
0:26:48 > 0:26:49Now's your chance.
0:26:50 > 0:26:53That weekend was absolutely amazing!
0:26:53 > 0:26:56I reckon I know pretty much all there is to
0:26:56 > 0:26:57know about the human heart.
0:26:57 > 0:27:00And I went to the Castle, the Dungeons, I saw Arthur's seat.
0:27:00 > 0:27:03As if, right - there's an extinct volcano...
0:27:05 > 0:27:08He was happy to accept that we'd had an affair.
0:27:08 > 0:27:10Anything that bolsters his death wish.
0:27:10 > 0:27:13- What do you think you're doing you stupid...- It's my dad.
0:27:13 > 0:27:17- What?- My dad. He's fallen. He can't move.- Where is he?
0:27:17 > 0:27:19For you to be there at our wedding today.
0:27:19 > 0:27:20It would mean the world to us both.
0:27:22 > 0:27:23Go to hell!
0:27:23 > 0:27:26- I couldn't have imagined this! - Neither could I.
0:27:48 > 0:27:51Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd