0:00:30 > 0:00:32TELEPHONE RINGS
0:00:32 > 0:00:33Sorry!
0:00:33 > 0:00:36RINGING TONE: Born This Way by Lady Gaga
0:00:40 > 0:00:42Hi, gorgeous!
0:00:42 > 0:00:45So... What time am I seeing you tonight then?
0:00:45 > 0:00:48Ciaran, I don't think I can see you.
0:00:48 > 0:00:50What's up?
0:00:50 > 0:00:51'Have you got band practice?'
0:00:51 > 0:00:53No, it's not that.
0:00:53 > 0:00:55Cos I am tired of sharing you with a saxophone!
0:00:56 > 0:01:01No, er... Look, this is really difficult, but...
0:01:01 > 0:01:02Oh! I was talking to Big Steve.
0:01:02 > 0:01:05He says would we like to come round to his place for a pizza?
0:01:05 > 0:01:07Look, will you just shut up!
0:01:07 > 0:01:08Right.
0:01:08 > 0:01:13You know the way things have their own natural lifespan.
0:01:13 > 0:01:16Like, er...cheese and milk.
0:01:16 > 0:01:18Yes.
0:01:18 > 0:01:22I think we've gone past our sell-by date.
0:01:30 > 0:01:31Guess who?
0:01:33 > 0:01:34Ciaran?
0:01:47 > 0:01:49Are you OK there, Mrs Tembe?
0:01:49 > 0:01:50Dr Granger.
0:01:50 > 0:01:54I was just wondering who will be the next person to sit in this office?
0:01:54 > 0:01:57A-ha. Well, we may not know for a couple of months.
0:01:57 > 0:02:01We've got to write an advert, hold interviews.
0:02:01 > 0:02:02I wish you well,
0:02:02 > 0:02:07but I do not think you will find anyone half as good as Mrs Parsons.
0:02:07 > 0:02:12Well, yes, she was a very good manager but we'll cope. You'll see.
0:02:12 > 0:02:13If you say so.
0:02:15 > 0:02:17Right. The first thing we need to do is get this nameplate off.
0:02:20 > 0:02:22Do you know how we can prise that off?
0:02:22 > 0:02:25No. Mrs Parsons would have.
0:02:29 > 0:02:31Nice place.
0:02:31 > 0:02:32No, it isn't.
0:02:39 > 0:02:42I can't believe he dumped me over the phone.
0:02:42 > 0:02:44And now, he's gone up to Scotland
0:02:44 > 0:02:46to his granddad's funeral, so I can't even see him.
0:02:46 > 0:02:48Did he give you a reason?
0:02:48 > 0:02:50All he said is he was getting bored.
0:02:50 > 0:02:51Am I really that boring?
0:02:51 > 0:02:54Was he so bored for the past nine months
0:02:54 > 0:02:56that he couldn't even be bothered to dump me?
0:02:56 > 0:02:59You are not boring. You're wonderful.
0:03:04 > 0:03:06Ciaran?
0:03:06 > 0:03:08Yes?
0:03:08 > 0:03:11There's this strange woman outside staring at us.
0:03:11 > 0:03:13What?
0:03:15 > 0:03:17It's my Aunty Bridie!
0:03:17 > 0:03:18Who?
0:03:18 > 0:03:21What the...? How did she...?
0:03:27 > 0:03:29SHE LAUGHS
0:03:29 > 0:03:30Ciaran!
0:03:30 > 0:03:32Aunty Bridie!
0:03:34 > 0:03:35Come in, come in, come in.
0:03:35 > 0:03:37Thank you. Oh!
0:03:42 > 0:03:44Hello, there!
0:03:44 > 0:03:46Sorry for the intrusion.
0:03:46 > 0:03:47I'm Bridie.
0:03:47 > 0:03:48Imogen.
0:03:48 > 0:03:50But I thought you were on holiday?
0:03:50 > 0:03:56That's right. Six weeks round the world, luxury cruise.
0:03:56 > 0:03:59But when I got to Southampton, and I saw the gangplank,
0:03:59 > 0:04:03and the ship, and I heard the brass band playing We Are Sailing,
0:04:03 > 0:04:06I thought to myself, "Who am I kidding?
0:04:06 > 0:04:08"I can't do... I've barely left Ireland,
0:04:08 > 0:04:11- "I can't do this at my time of life."- I see.
0:04:11 > 0:04:15So I thought, I'll come and see my nephew. Oooh!
0:04:15 > 0:04:19- Your hair is lovely.- So's yours.
0:04:19 > 0:04:22Now, I've been sitting on that train for two hours.
0:04:22 > 0:04:24What do you have to do to get a cup of tea around here?
0:04:24 > 0:04:27Right. I'll be just a minute.
0:04:27 > 0:04:29Well...
0:04:29 > 0:04:34My nephew never told me he had a lady friend.
0:04:34 > 0:04:35No, we're not together.
0:04:35 > 0:04:38Oh, I know young people like to keep it casual nowadays.
0:04:38 > 0:04:42But, whatever you call it, I'm glad he's got some company.
0:04:42 > 0:04:44No, but really, we're, we're...
0:04:44 > 0:04:46My husband died last year,
0:04:46 > 0:04:49and Ciaran used to write to me every week,
0:04:49 > 0:04:50you know, to cheer me up.
0:04:50 > 0:04:53But recently, I haven't been getting any e-mails,
0:04:53 > 0:04:55and I was beginning to wonder, is there something wrong?
0:04:55 > 0:04:59But now, I realise - he was having far too much fun with you!
0:05:04 > 0:05:06How is mission control?
0:05:06 > 0:05:08Ah, yeah, all systems go, really.
0:05:08 > 0:05:12I'm just gradually working my way through some of Julia's patronising post-it notes.
0:05:12 > 0:05:15I was talking to this old friend of mine,
0:05:15 > 0:05:18who's just been made redundant, so he's become an IT consultant.
0:05:18 > 0:05:23And he says he's got this new payroll software which is very user-friendly.
0:05:23 > 0:05:24That sounds good.
0:05:24 > 0:05:25WHISTLE
0:05:25 > 0:05:26- Come in.- Is Zara in?
0:05:26 > 0:05:28She's not. Anything we can help with?
0:05:28 > 0:05:30It's just this patient review thing.
0:05:30 > 0:05:32I'll have a look. I was your mentor.
0:05:32 > 0:05:35Well, we're very busy, do you think you could come back tomorrow?
0:05:36 > 0:05:38Right. Is Zara in tomorrow?
0:05:45 > 0:05:46There we go.
0:05:46 > 0:05:49Oh, is that a cappuccino?
0:05:49 > 0:05:53No, I think there's something wrong with the milk.
0:05:53 > 0:05:57Right. I must just wash my hands.
0:05:58 > 0:06:01Is that too strong for you?
0:06:02 > 0:06:05You know that she thinks we're a couple?
0:06:05 > 0:06:08Does she?
0:06:08 > 0:06:11So she doesn't know that you're...gay?
0:06:11 > 0:06:14Well, Aunty Bridie is a bit old-fashioned,
0:06:14 > 0:06:16and she just had major heart surgery last year,
0:06:16 > 0:06:19so I don't want to do anything that might...shock her.
0:06:22 > 0:06:24What if she goes in my room?
0:06:29 > 0:06:31Oh, wow. I see what you mean.
0:06:31 > 0:06:33I think this might be the campest room I've ever been in.
0:06:33 > 0:06:34I'm sorry, David.
0:06:34 > 0:06:36Lady Gaga, Katy...
0:06:36 > 0:06:39Your CD collection is never having grandchildren.
0:06:39 > 0:06:41- Hide everything here.- Right.
0:06:44 > 0:06:46Oh! We're going to need a bigger bed.
0:06:46 > 0:06:47KNOCKS ON DOOR
0:06:47 > 0:06:49Hello? Anyone home?
0:06:49 > 0:06:52- What are you two up to? - We were just, er...
0:06:52 > 0:06:53Straightening up the bedroom.
0:06:53 > 0:06:54It's very nice.
0:06:54 > 0:06:58It's almost... minimalist.
0:06:58 > 0:07:00Oh, who is this?
0:07:00 > 0:07:02That? That, that's...
0:07:02 > 0:07:04That's no-one.
0:07:04 > 0:07:06I notice there are no photographs of you and Imogen.
0:07:06 > 0:07:09That's because we...
0:07:09 > 0:07:12have been meaning to, haven't we?
0:07:12 > 0:07:15I keep telling him, "Why can't we just have our photo taken?
0:07:15 > 0:07:17"Am I really that ugly?"
0:07:17 > 0:07:20That's men for you. Unromantic. My Brendan was just the same.
0:07:20 > 0:07:22Right. Well, I really better be going.
0:07:22 > 0:07:27Nonsense. I'm taking the pair of you out for a slap-up meal.
0:07:27 > 0:07:30And then, I have a surprise for you.
0:07:35 > 0:07:37Are you not coming?
0:07:37 > 0:07:39I am really not in the mood.
0:07:39 > 0:07:41Why don't you go without me.
0:07:41 > 0:07:43A few karate kicks would do you good, go on.
0:07:43 > 0:07:46Right now, there is not much that would lift my spirits.
0:07:46 > 0:07:48KNOCKS ON THE DOOR
0:07:48 > 0:07:50Oh, look, there's a man at the door with a large package.
0:07:50 > 0:07:54Ooh, that's my spirits lifted.
0:07:54 > 0:07:55Why don't you come and keep me company?
0:07:55 > 0:07:59With Mrs Parsons gone, there is so much to do now.
0:07:59 > 0:08:02And I do not want to abandon Dr Carter or Dr Granger.
0:08:02 > 0:08:03They're both grown men.
0:08:03 > 0:08:06It's not as if they're going to play with matches.
0:08:06 > 0:08:08OK, right, not a googly this time, OK? Right.
0:08:08 > 0:08:12All right. This is the new payroll software installed.
0:08:12 > 0:08:15- Bravo!- Shot!- How's that?
0:08:15 > 0:08:19- And this is the stationery order sorted. Ready?- A-ha.
0:08:19 > 0:08:21- Six!- Shot!
0:08:21 > 0:08:24Which begs the question - what did Julia do all day?
0:08:24 > 0:08:26Answers on a postcard, please.
0:08:26 > 0:08:28All right...
0:08:28 > 0:08:32- Oh! That reminds me, would it be OK to have an advance on next month's wages?- I don't see why not.
0:08:32 > 0:08:34I'll give Monty a ring, to bring the payday forward a week.
0:08:34 > 0:08:36KNOCKS ON DOOR
0:08:36 > 0:08:37Come in.
0:08:37 > 0:08:40This just came for the practice manager.
0:08:40 > 0:08:41- 'It's Heston here...' - Looks a bit ominous.
0:08:41 > 0:08:45- '...possible to bring forward someone's payday...?' - How's it going?- Yeah, fine.
0:08:45 > 0:08:48- Small changes. Nothing too drastic. - You're not serious.
0:08:48 > 0:08:53Well, yes, I suggest you phone me back when it is sorted, thank you.
0:08:53 > 0:08:54What's up?
0:08:54 > 0:08:57It's probably nothing, but the chap who did the software said
0:08:57 > 0:09:01that, technically, it may not be ready until the next calendar month.
0:09:01 > 0:09:03- What does that mean? - You won't be paid till June.
0:09:03 > 0:09:05All of us?!
0:09:05 > 0:09:08No, the partners are on standing orders.
0:09:09 > 0:09:11Is that supposed to make me feel better!?
0:09:11 > 0:09:13Heston, is there any way we can get back on the old system?
0:09:13 > 0:09:15I'm not very good with computer software.
0:09:15 > 0:09:19How are you with industrial action?
0:09:19 > 0:09:24I'll have a maxi-mozzarella panini with a sun-blushed tomato pesto...
0:09:24 > 0:09:26What exactly is that?
0:09:27 > 0:09:29You'll like it!
0:09:31 > 0:09:32Don't look now!
0:09:32 > 0:09:34What?!
0:09:35 > 0:09:37Ciaran!
0:09:37 > 0:09:40Jack! Hi! How are you?
0:09:40 > 0:09:44I'm not bad, I've just done my European law exam, and came in to...
0:09:44 > 0:09:45Immie?!
0:09:45 > 0:09:47Hiya.
0:09:47 > 0:09:49Good afternoon. Bridie.
0:09:49 > 0:09:51Oh, um, this is my brother Jack.
0:09:51 > 0:09:53Your brother?
0:09:53 > 0:09:56So you're the guardian angel that brought these two young people together?
0:09:56 > 0:09:58Yes.
0:09:59 > 0:10:02Hang on, why are you having lunch with my sister?
0:10:02 > 0:10:04Because she's my girlfriend!
0:10:04 > 0:10:08Oh, nice bit of designer stubble you've got there.
0:10:08 > 0:10:11- What?- Or are you growing a beard?
0:10:11 > 0:10:14BRIDIE LAUGHS
0:10:14 > 0:10:15Don't let us keep you.
0:10:15 > 0:10:17Will you not stay for lunch?
0:10:17 > 0:10:19Oh, I wouldn't want to disturb these two lovebirds.
0:10:19 > 0:10:21It's bad enough when they come round our house.
0:10:21 > 0:10:25- You can't hear the telly over the sound of them snogging. - Oh, too much information!
0:10:25 > 0:10:28So, no. I'll leave you two to get it on.
0:10:28 > 0:10:30Easy, tigers.
0:10:32 > 0:10:35He seems very nice.
0:10:35 > 0:10:36Now, wine?
0:10:39 > 0:10:42Now, to disarm an attacker, which part of the body should we aim for?
0:10:42 > 0:10:47Oh! Now, I would go for the back of the neck with a karate chop.
0:10:47 > 0:10:50OK, but you may need to borrow a stepladder. Anyone else?
0:10:50 > 0:10:52The shins?
0:10:52 > 0:10:53Excellent.
0:10:53 > 0:10:56I'm glad someone has their head screwed on. The shins.
0:10:56 > 0:10:58Simple but effective.
0:10:59 > 0:11:02Right, well. That was lovely, thank you much,
0:11:02 > 0:11:04but I really better be going.
0:11:04 > 0:11:05Oh, not just yet.
0:11:06 > 0:11:09I have a confession to make.
0:11:09 > 0:11:12I haven't been 100% honest with you.
0:11:14 > 0:11:17This, er... This trip of a lifetime...
0:11:19 > 0:11:24The reason I couldn't go had nothing to do with being scared of travel.
0:11:24 > 0:11:28But I booked it in 2009,
0:11:28 > 0:11:32when my Brendan was still with me.
0:11:32 > 0:11:36We would have sailed away together.
0:11:36 > 0:11:43But now he's gone to that luxury cruise amongst the stars.
0:11:43 > 0:11:45I see.
0:11:45 > 0:11:48I thought I could do it in memory of him,
0:11:48 > 0:11:54but when I got there, I realised...that ship had sailed.
0:11:54 > 0:11:56Will they give you a refund?
0:11:56 > 0:11:59No, they won't. The chiselling little crooks.
0:11:59 > 0:12:02But I can transfer the tickets to someone else,
0:12:02 > 0:12:04and change the dates if necessary.
0:12:04 > 0:12:10Now, seeing the two of you today - so young, and so in love,
0:12:10 > 0:12:13I thought, You should go on this cruise.
0:12:13 > 0:12:17It'll be the perfect celebration for the end of your exams.
0:12:17 > 0:12:22All I ask is that you send me a postcard from every destination.
0:12:22 > 0:12:25Barcelona, Egypt,
0:12:25 > 0:12:29Mumbai, Singapore.
0:12:30 > 0:12:33One, two, three and strike!
0:12:33 > 0:12:35- Ah!- Oh!- Oh!
0:12:35 > 0:12:38I am so sorry.
0:12:38 > 0:12:41Did you say left?
0:12:41 > 0:12:43Not only are you not yet ready for a knee strike,
0:12:43 > 0:12:45I wouldn't want to see you do the Hokey Cokey.
0:12:45 > 0:12:48I am doing my best, but you are talking very quickly.
0:12:48 > 0:12:49All right.
0:12:49 > 0:12:52Everyone find a safe place to stand,
0:12:52 > 0:12:55not too close to Mrs Tembe.
0:12:55 > 0:12:58Let see if we can get it right this time.
0:12:58 > 0:13:01And one, two, three...
0:13:01 > 0:13:06For six weeks, you'll live like a queen.
0:13:06 > 0:13:09Silver service at the captain's table.
0:13:09 > 0:13:13Champagne delivered by handsome sailors.
0:13:13 > 0:13:17It's a really kind offer, and it sounds amazing...
0:13:17 > 0:13:20So that's a yes! We'd love to.
0:13:20 > 0:13:23- You what!?- You were just saying how I never do anything romantic.
0:13:23 > 0:13:26What could be lovelier than you and me sailing the seven seas?
0:13:26 > 0:13:31Oh, you make my heart sing, the two of you!
0:13:31 > 0:13:35Oh! I just... I have to powder my nose.
0:13:39 > 0:13:41What were you thinking?!
0:13:41 > 0:13:43I don't know. The words just came out of my mouth.
0:13:43 > 0:13:45That is the lamest excuse ever!
0:13:45 > 0:13:48Look, she really wants us to do this.
0:13:48 > 0:13:50So why don't we just go on the cruise,
0:13:50 > 0:13:53and then we tell her we split up. People do, you know.
0:13:54 > 0:13:55What?
0:14:00 > 0:14:03But however much technique you've learned,
0:14:03 > 0:14:06your opponent will always have the element of surprise.
0:14:06 > 0:14:09So I am now going to mount a surprise attack on each of you,
0:14:09 > 0:14:12and it's up to you to try and beat me off. Understood?
0:14:12 > 0:14:14ALL: Yes.
0:14:14 > 0:14:16HE SCREAMS
0:14:16 > 0:14:17Oh! Oh, sorry.
0:14:17 > 0:14:21- Er... So you come from the right. A left knee strike?- Don't ask me, I'm your attacker!
0:14:21 > 0:14:23Sorry, I wasn't ready.
0:14:23 > 0:14:25Well, let's hope if you do get mugged,
0:14:25 > 0:14:27he remembers to book an appointment.
0:14:27 > 0:14:30- Sorry.- Mrs Tembe?
0:14:30 > 0:14:34I have decided that this class is not for me.
0:14:34 > 0:14:37Fair enough. I guess it is a bit full on.
0:14:37 > 0:14:41But, if you're interested, we also do keep-fit classes for the over 50s.
0:14:46 > 0:14:48BAG DROPS
0:14:49 > 0:14:51- Kenny.- Oh.
0:14:51 > 0:14:54I'm sorry, I though you were on the way to your granddad's funeral?
0:14:54 > 0:14:57Hiya, Grandpa! You seem to have made an amazing recovery.
0:14:57 > 0:15:01- I invented that to stop you making a scene.- You invented your granddad's funeral?!
0:15:01 > 0:15:03He does have acute angina.
0:15:03 > 0:15:06Well, that makes everything all right? And you are?
0:15:06 > 0:15:09This is Simon. Look, I've been trying to tell you for a while now.
0:15:09 > 0:15:11- When?- All the time!
0:15:11 > 0:15:13But the trouble is you're always so happy.
0:15:13 > 0:15:14Well, thanks for that. Now, I won't be.
0:15:14 > 0:15:17Look, I know how you must feel, but...
0:15:17 > 0:15:19No! You have no idea how I feel!
0:15:19 > 0:15:22Imagine being kicked repeatedly in the teeth
0:15:22 > 0:15:24by the first person you ever gave your heart to.
0:15:24 > 0:15:26Ciaran?
0:15:26 > 0:15:29Anyway, that was my exam on Monday.
0:15:29 > 0:15:34My Wednesday exam is imagine being torn apart by a pack of wolves.
0:15:34 > 0:15:36Nice bumping into you. Call me.
0:15:38 > 0:15:40- Isn't it marvellous? You have so many friends.- Yes.
0:15:40 > 0:15:41I really better be going.
0:15:41 > 0:15:44Ah, no, wait. There's something I have to do. Jack! Jack!
0:15:44 > 0:15:47- Hello? - Would you do me a huge favour?
0:15:47 > 0:15:49Would you ever take a photograph of the three of us?
0:15:49 > 0:15:53Oh, yeah! Let's see if I can capture that red hot passion.
0:15:57 > 0:16:00MUSIC: Kung Fu Fighting by Carl Douglas
0:16:00 > 0:16:01HE SCREAMS
0:16:01 > 0:16:02Oh! Ah!
0:16:25 > 0:16:28THEY ALL CLAP
0:16:38 > 0:16:40Thank you so much.
0:16:40 > 0:16:41Oh, you're welcome.
0:16:41 > 0:16:43I hope I get to take the photos at their wedding,
0:16:43 > 0:16:45if he ever does take her up the aisle.
0:16:45 > 0:16:47Right. I really, really have to go.
0:16:47 > 0:16:53Aw! Not just yet. But I was going to show the photos of my golden retriever, Colonel Mustard Seed...
0:16:53 > 0:16:54I'm sure he's lovely...
0:16:54 > 0:16:57..who died of cancer six months ago.
0:16:57 > 0:17:00Look, don't worry. It won't be long now.
0:17:00 > 0:17:04That's what they said when they amputated his tail.
0:17:05 > 0:17:08Thanks again. I'll see you next week.
0:17:08 > 0:17:11Are you sure you're all right?
0:17:11 > 0:17:13Yeah, fine.
0:17:13 > 0:17:15That was some really good work.
0:17:15 > 0:17:18Oh, thank you. You know, it is just the luck of the beginner.
0:17:22 > 0:17:24THEY CHUCKLE
0:17:25 > 0:17:28TELEPHONE RINGS
0:17:30 > 0:17:32Aren't you going to get that?
0:17:32 > 0:17:34Probably not for me.
0:17:34 > 0:17:35Any chance of a cup of tea?
0:17:35 > 0:17:37- 'No-one home, please leave a message.'- I'll get it.
0:17:37 > 0:17:39Let's go and set up your laptop, shall we?
0:17:39 > 0:17:42'Ciaran, I've been trying your mobile, are you there?
0:17:42 > 0:17:45'Look, I'm really sorry I had to...'
0:17:46 > 0:17:48Is there something wrong?
0:17:48 > 0:17:51It's just my housemate. He's a bit obsessive.
0:17:51 > 0:17:52Why don't you go and take a seat?
0:17:52 > 0:17:54Right.
0:17:56 > 0:18:00You have got to tell her the truth.
0:18:06 > 0:18:08KNOCKS ON DOOR
0:18:08 > 0:18:09What!
0:18:09 > 0:18:10How's it going?
0:18:10 > 0:18:12Not good.
0:18:12 > 0:18:14I'm wondering if the best way out of this is to fake my own death.
0:18:14 > 0:18:17Heston, what's all this about us not being paid?
0:18:17 > 0:18:20No, there is still a possibility that you may be paid on time.
0:18:20 > 0:18:22Oh, whoop-dee-doo.
0:18:22 > 0:18:24There still a possibility I may come into work tomorrow.
0:18:24 > 0:18:26There's no latex gloves in the nurses' room.
0:18:26 > 0:18:28Yes, I've changed suppliers. Got a much better deal.
0:18:28 > 0:18:32- So when are we getting a new batch? - Don't worry about that. We're not getting paid.
0:18:32 > 0:18:35- We're not being paid?!- There is a chance that you may be paid.
0:18:35 > 0:18:38Oh, fantastic! You keep saying that! Are we having a raffle or what?
0:18:38 > 0:18:40- Just to check...- What do you want?
0:18:40 > 0:18:42Zara is definitely coming in tomorrow, right?
0:18:45 > 0:18:46HE SIGHS
0:18:56 > 0:18:59- Aunty Bridie.- Mm-mm, yes.- There's something I wanted to talk about.
0:18:59 > 0:19:00Right.
0:19:00 > 0:19:03And there's something I wanted to ask you.
0:19:03 > 0:19:04What is it?
0:19:04 > 0:19:07- No, you go first. - No, no, no, after you.
0:19:07 > 0:19:12Well, it's all a bit difficult, but it's Imogen.
0:19:12 > 0:19:15I mean, she's a lovely girl, but...
0:19:15 > 0:19:17Are you sure...?
0:19:17 > 0:19:19Is she a lesbian?
0:19:19 > 0:19:21What?!
0:19:21 > 0:19:24Well, I've been looking through these photos.
0:19:24 > 0:19:26Now, it's very clear that you worship the ground she walks on,
0:19:26 > 0:19:28you can see it in your eyes.
0:19:28 > 0:19:31But she...
0:19:31 > 0:19:35Sometimes, she seems to...you know, flinch away from you,
0:19:35 > 0:19:38as if she can't bear to be touched
0:19:38 > 0:19:41by a big masculine person like yourself.
0:19:41 > 0:19:44Aunty Bridie,
0:19:44 > 0:19:45Immie is not a lesbian.
0:19:45 > 0:19:47Are you sure?
0:19:47 > 0:19:49I'm positive.
0:19:49 > 0:19:50Thank goodness for that.
0:19:50 > 0:19:53Oh! I know it's not very politically correct,
0:19:53 > 0:19:55but I think they should all be locked up.
0:19:55 > 0:19:57Not out of cruelty, but just, you know,
0:19:57 > 0:20:01to stop them spreading their silly ideas around.
0:20:01 > 0:20:03What was it you wanted to say to me?
0:20:03 > 0:20:05Nothing. It was nothing.
0:20:05 > 0:20:08Now, where did they put my glasses?
0:20:10 > 0:20:14ALL TALK AT ONCE
0:20:14 > 0:20:17Quiet! Right. Having been practice manager for a day,
0:20:17 > 0:20:20I now realise what a true force of nature Julia was.
0:20:20 > 0:20:21Heston...
0:20:21 > 0:20:25Yes, we saw the glamorous side of her swanning off for meals with her friends.
0:20:25 > 0:20:29But I now know how hard she had to work to keep things running smoothly.
0:20:29 > 0:20:32So WHEN are we going to get a new manager?
0:20:32 > 0:20:34We have to advertise, have interviews.
0:20:34 > 0:20:35But Rome wasn't built in a day.
0:20:35 > 0:20:37- It'll take for ever!- It took years
0:20:37 > 0:20:39to get the practice the way it is now.
0:20:39 > 0:20:41Yeah, it's only taken you a couple of hours to ruin it.
0:20:41 > 0:20:43Teething problems, teething problems.
0:20:43 > 0:20:45I will sort out the payroll issue.
0:20:45 > 0:20:48I will personally buy the latex gloves.
0:20:48 > 0:20:53But I would really appreciate it if I didn't have these constant interruptions.
0:20:53 > 0:20:55- Fine.- OK.
0:20:55 > 0:20:57Whatever.
0:20:58 > 0:21:01It could take weeks to find someone. What are we going to do?
0:21:01 > 0:21:04I don't know. Commit hara-kiri?
0:21:06 > 0:21:08Are you all right?
0:21:08 > 0:21:11It's been a long day, I just need to sit down.
0:21:11 > 0:21:12No! Don't!
0:21:12 > 0:21:13Ciaran?
0:21:13 > 0:21:16What exactly have I sat on?
0:21:16 > 0:21:18Oh, it's him again!
0:21:18 > 0:21:21Who is this fellow?
0:21:21 > 0:21:23Well, it's, er...
0:21:26 > 0:21:28His name is Kenny.
0:21:28 > 0:21:30And last year, we were in a play together.
0:21:30 > 0:21:33I played Oscar Wilde, and he was my Bosie.
0:21:33 > 0:21:37Only soon, it became clear that we weren't acting.
0:21:38 > 0:21:41- You mean you're...- That's right.
0:21:41 > 0:21:44I'm one of those people that you think should be locked up.
0:21:46 > 0:21:49Well, aren't you going to say something?
0:21:49 > 0:21:51What is there to say?
0:21:51 > 0:21:53I'm just glad your Uncle Brendan isn't around.
0:21:53 > 0:21:55He thought the world of you.
0:21:57 > 0:22:00It would break his heart if he saw what you'd turned into.
0:22:06 > 0:22:07KNOCKS ON DOOR
0:22:07 > 0:22:10Yes!
0:22:10 > 0:22:12Ah, Mrs Tembe. My world is collapsing around me,
0:22:12 > 0:22:14but I still have the pleasure of your red bush.
0:22:14 > 0:22:17I am sure things are not so bad as they seem.
0:22:17 > 0:22:20Until we get a practice manager.
0:22:20 > 0:22:22How was your self-defence?
0:22:22 > 0:22:26Ugh! I have decided I do not need these lessons.
0:22:26 > 0:22:28I know how to look after myself.
0:22:28 > 0:22:30I wouldn't argue with that.
0:22:30 > 0:22:33So, this practice manager...
0:22:33 > 0:22:35What kind of person are you looking for?
0:22:35 > 0:22:37Conscientious, well-organised,
0:22:37 > 0:22:41good people skills and, with the pressures of this job,
0:22:41 > 0:22:42the courage of a lion.
0:22:42 > 0:22:47And can it be someone who already works here?
0:22:47 > 0:22:50Are you thinking of throwing your hat in the ring?
0:22:50 > 0:22:55Well, I was not going to, but you seem to have planted a seed in me.
0:22:56 > 0:23:01Look, Ciaran is still the same person than he was ten minutes ago.
0:23:01 > 0:23:05The only difference is that now he's being honest with you.
0:23:05 > 0:23:06Well...
0:23:09 > 0:23:11Maybe I don't want to know.
0:23:11 > 0:23:15He was such a sweet, innocent little boy.
0:23:15 > 0:23:17And now, look at him.
0:23:17 > 0:23:22You know, I don't care what you think!
0:23:22 > 0:23:25Because all day I've been trying to...
0:23:25 > 0:23:29to keep my feelings hidden,
0:23:29 > 0:23:32and I just can't!
0:23:32 > 0:23:34He left me!
0:23:34 > 0:23:39We were together for nine months, and then this morning, he dumped me.
0:23:39 > 0:23:42That's why Immie was hugging me.
0:23:43 > 0:23:47Because if she didn't, I felt as if I might break.
0:23:49 > 0:23:51Did he give you a reason?
0:23:51 > 0:23:54He said there was someone else. That guy he was with.
0:23:54 > 0:23:56Right.
0:23:58 > 0:23:59Why would he leave you for him?
0:23:59 > 0:24:01I don't know.
0:24:01 > 0:24:03You're not going to do anything stupid, are you?
0:24:03 > 0:24:05Like what?
0:24:05 > 0:24:07Well, I'm not going to give you any ideas.
0:24:07 > 0:24:10- Don't worry, I won't.- Good.
0:24:11 > 0:24:14I don't approve of...
0:24:14 > 0:24:16Well, you know.
0:24:16 > 0:24:22But...how dare that little so-and-so dump my nephew?
0:24:25 > 0:24:27You know you can still go on this holiday if you want.
0:24:29 > 0:24:31And bring your friend.
0:24:31 > 0:24:34It might take your mind off that little toerag.
0:24:36 > 0:24:38- Why don't you go together? - What?
0:24:38 > 0:24:39SHE CHUCKLES
0:24:39 > 0:24:42You wouldn't want to go on holiday with your auld aunt.
0:24:42 > 0:24:44I can think of worse people.
0:24:44 > 0:24:49Come on, six weeks of sun, sea and...sailors.
0:24:49 > 0:24:54Well, I suppose we could go cruising together.
0:24:54 > 0:24:57You might even get to know each other a bit better?
0:24:59 > 0:25:00We might.
0:25:02 > 0:25:04Am I ever going to get that cup of tea?
0:25:17 > 0:25:18Ring-ring! Ring-ring!
0:25:18 > 0:25:19HOOVER IN THE BACKGROUND
0:25:19 > 0:25:22Ring-ring! Ring-ring!
0:25:22 > 0:25:23Ring-ring! Ring-ring!
0:25:23 > 0:25:28Yes, this is Mrs Tembe, practice manager...
0:25:28 > 0:25:33Nurse Clay... No, no, it is not convenient for you to have yet another holiday.
0:25:33 > 0:25:38Furthermore, we have received complaints about your constant canoodling with Dr Clay.
0:25:38 > 0:25:42So please, come and see me in my office, first thing in the morning.
0:25:42 > 0:25:44Good day to you.
0:25:46 > 0:25:47SHE CHUCKLES
0:25:52 > 0:25:54Oh, er...
0:25:54 > 0:25:56SHE CLEARS HER THROAT
0:25:56 > 0:25:59Maybe you could start cleaning the floor first.
0:25:59 > 0:26:01Some of my colleagues are very untidy.
0:26:01 > 0:26:03And I will see you in the morning.
0:26:13 > 0:26:14Mum.
0:26:14 > 0:26:16'Why didn't you tell me'
0:26:16 > 0:26:17you were coming home?
0:26:17 > 0:26:18Don't tell her.
0:26:18 > 0:26:21No-one can scratch their backsides here without my approval.
0:26:21 > 0:26:23I need you to tell me the truth, Evie.
0:26:23 > 0:26:25I've lost something very important.
0:26:25 > 0:26:27You can't beat sex from a natural high.
0:26:27 > 0:26:29- The three of us could have a session.- Sorry?
0:26:29 > 0:26:32Everyone expects me to have some kind of telepathic link to Julia
0:26:32 > 0:26:36and, if I am honest, I'm finding it just a bit overwhelming.
0:26:56 > 0:26:59Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd