Bursting Balloons

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0:00:29 > 0:00:32Right, mister, don't forget you're making your own tea tonight.

0:00:32 > 0:00:33Why? Where you going?

0:00:34 > 0:00:36It's Heston's do, thing, I told you.

0:00:36 > 0:00:38Not at the Icon?

0:00:38 > 0:00:41Calm down. You don't even work there any more.

0:00:41 > 0:00:43I told the boss I'd cover for him tonight.

0:00:43 > 0:00:47Aw, that's fantastic! Mate's rates it is, then.

0:00:47 > 0:00:50No way. I want you out and your cronies out by 11 at the latest.

0:00:50 > 0:00:5411? We'll only just be getting started.

0:00:54 > 0:00:57I mean it, Mum. None of your smoking parsley in the bogs.

0:00:57 > 0:01:00I've got loads of coursework due in and some new barmaid

0:01:00 > 0:01:04- I'm supposed to keep an eye on. - You'll save us a table though, won't you? And break out the bar snacks.

0:01:04 > 0:01:07Will you just get lost! I am trying to work.

0:01:13 > 0:01:17What about The Help? It's perfect. I've got a copy by my bed. It's got everything,

0:01:17 > 0:01:22- bit of feminism, race, political history...- Have you read it?

0:01:22 > 0:01:24Seen the film.

0:01:25 > 0:01:27OK. Gossip magazine?

0:01:27 > 0:01:31Is this really necessary? It's just Letherbridge Life.

0:01:31 > 0:01:35Yes! This whole house is a disaster.

0:01:35 > 0:01:38They're going to look at it, they're going to look at us

0:01:38 > 0:01:40and think what saddo lives here?

0:01:40 > 0:01:44What kind of deluded person has a fair-trade, embroidered

0:01:44 > 0:01:46remote-control holder?

0:01:46 > 0:01:47Sit down will you, sit down.

0:01:47 > 0:01:50It's you that's making the place look a mess.

0:01:55 > 0:01:58Ooh, you look very sleek and gorgeous. Is that for your date with egg man?

0:01:58 > 0:02:02Will you stop going on about that Martin guy. I've told you.

0:02:02 > 0:02:05He's rude and arrogant and I wouldn't cross the road for him.

0:02:05 > 0:02:09Date? But you are coming to the Icon?

0:02:09 > 0:02:11Doctor Carter needs to see a unified show of support.

0:02:11 > 0:02:16- So you've cancelled him, then? - I don't need to do I, he just assumed....

0:02:16 > 0:02:19I think we should stop talking about Mrs Parson's

0:02:19 > 0:02:22romantic entanglements and turn our attention to the stock-take.

0:02:22 > 0:02:25What? You mean you didn't finish that while I was out for lunch?

0:02:27 > 0:02:29Hello. Can I help you?

0:02:29 > 0:02:32- Yeah, can I...- Yeah, my sister needs to see the doctor.

0:02:32 > 0:02:36- I'm sure she can talk for herself - what's your name?- Sunpreet Sharda.

0:02:36 > 0:02:39She's got a really bad tummy ache and she keeps wanting to be sick.

0:02:39 > 0:02:42Like an infection or something... My parents want me to get her checked out.

0:02:42 > 0:02:43Your parents?

0:02:43 > 0:02:47We're both living away. This is her first year at uni.

0:02:47 > 0:02:48Right.

0:02:48 > 0:02:50Dr Granger is doing our drop-in clinic today,

0:02:50 > 0:02:53so if you take a seat over there he won't be very long.

0:02:57 > 0:02:58Why do you do that, talk for me?

0:02:58 > 0:03:00That woman thinks you're really weird.

0:03:00 > 0:03:05- I have to, don't I? Or you wouldn't bother to come. - I don't even need to see a doctor.

0:03:05 > 0:03:08No arguments, Mum said. Do you want me to come in with you?

0:03:08 > 0:03:09No.

0:03:11 > 0:03:12How is he?

0:03:12 > 0:03:14'He just finished painting a picture'

0:03:14 > 0:03:15of the Eiffel tower, and now

0:03:15 > 0:03:17- 'he's playing piano.' - We haven't got a piano.

0:03:17 > 0:03:20Don't ask silly questions, then.

0:03:20 > 0:03:21'I just wondering'

0:03:21 > 0:03:23how he was after yesterday.

0:03:23 > 0:03:26- 'What?'- His first time left on his own with Aliona.

0:03:26 > 0:03:28Be understandable if he was a bit unsettled,

0:03:28 > 0:03:30- 'anxious.'- He's not.

0:03:30 > 0:03:33- Good.- 'If he shows any signs of attachment disorder,'

0:03:33 > 0:03:35believe me, you'll be the first to know.

0:03:35 > 0:03:39Look, I can't help feeling a little bit paranoid if you don't keep me in the loop.

0:03:39 > 0:03:42If you want to be "in the loop" - phone Aliona

0:03:42 > 0:03:43and ask her to baby-sit later.

0:03:43 > 0:03:44Right. Fine.

0:03:44 > 0:03:47- KNOCK ON DOOR - Daniel, you've got... Sorry.

0:03:47 > 0:03:49Two secs. Zara?

0:03:51 > 0:03:55How are you, darling? How's that picture of the Eiffel tower coming on?

0:03:55 > 0:03:57Right. The cafetiere is loaded.

0:03:57 > 0:03:59News to me we even had one.

0:03:59 > 0:04:03Do you think it's bad if she sees a doctor drinking coffee? I think maybe I should have a green tea.

0:04:03 > 0:04:05Come on, this is ridiculous!

0:04:05 > 0:04:07Why are you even trying to impress this Cara woman?

0:04:07 > 0:04:11Because she does a lot of proper famous people...

0:04:11 > 0:04:13Who?

0:04:13 > 0:04:17That bloke off Strictly. And besides, if she takes against me, that could...

0:04:17 > 0:04:20She could alienate all my fans.

0:04:20 > 0:04:22That's why "proper" famous celebs don't do interviews.

0:04:22 > 0:04:26Look, this is all I've got at the moment and I'm sorry

0:04:26 > 0:04:30but being a local celebrity is a bit more appealing to me right now

0:04:30 > 0:04:32than being a failed GP.

0:04:32 > 0:04:33You are not failed.

0:04:35 > 0:04:38Do you know how insulting that is to the rest of the population?

0:04:38 > 0:04:41- DOOR BELL RINGS - OK, look, Mand.

0:04:41 > 0:04:44I know you think this is sad and I know you think this is cheesy,

0:04:44 > 0:04:46but, please, I need you on my side.

0:04:53 > 0:04:54Do you have your period at the moment?

0:04:54 > 0:04:56No.

0:04:56 > 0:04:57Bowel movements OK?

0:04:57 > 0:04:59Yes.

0:04:59 > 0:05:01Do you want to hop on the couch for me?

0:05:01 > 0:05:04It's not that bad, it's just my brother stressing.

0:05:04 > 0:05:06OK, why don't you show me where it hurts.

0:05:06 > 0:05:08There.

0:05:08 > 0:05:09Bit tender?

0:05:10 > 0:05:13- Suppose. - Does it hurt when you urinate?

0:05:14 > 0:05:16Are you going to the loo any more than usual?

0:05:17 > 0:05:19Not sure.

0:05:19 > 0:05:22You're at uni, is that right?

0:05:22 > 0:05:24- Yeah. - And how's the social life there?

0:05:24 > 0:05:25Any chance you could be overdoing it?

0:05:25 > 0:05:27How do you mean?

0:05:27 > 0:05:29Just trying to work out if this is alcohol related.

0:05:29 > 0:05:31It's not. I don't drink.

0:05:31 > 0:05:34OK. Sorry. But you wouldn't believe how many students

0:05:34 > 0:05:38we get in here claiming to have some life-threatening illness

0:05:38 > 0:05:40when actually it's a hangover.

0:05:40 > 0:05:41I can't be sure what's wrong,

0:05:41 > 0:05:45so why don't we rule out a urinary infection first?

0:05:46 > 0:05:50If you just want to take this to the loo and give me a sample,

0:05:50 > 0:05:51we can go from there.

0:05:54 > 0:05:56- Nice to meet you.- Coffee?

0:05:56 > 0:05:59Hell no, not after midday or I'm like a crazy woman.

0:05:59 > 0:06:01Just water with a slice of lemon.

0:06:01 > 0:06:04You might just have to make do with a squirt.

0:06:04 > 0:06:07OK, so... where do you want me?

0:06:07 > 0:06:10The sofa is fine. We'll do the photos after.

0:06:12 > 0:06:15So. You have just met the infamous Mandy.

0:06:15 > 0:06:16We're not on yet.

0:06:19 > 0:06:24So, Freya. Are you one frank female?

0:06:24 > 0:06:26Yes. Totally.

0:06:27 > 0:06:31I don't think there's any point doing a blog unless your honest.

0:06:31 > 0:06:33And because it's how life really is,

0:06:33 > 0:06:37the everyday frustrations, that's why people connect to it.

0:06:37 > 0:06:41- How many fans have you got now? - 3,217.

0:06:47 > 0:06:49And are they ALL lesbians?

0:06:50 > 0:06:55No, no. They're mainly women.

0:06:55 > 0:06:57Just people from all over the world who like what I say.

0:06:57 > 0:07:01I think of blogging as a kind of a soap opera.

0:07:01 > 0:07:04So, something happens to me,

0:07:04 > 0:07:06I write about it and my fans check in to find out how it went.

0:07:06 > 0:07:08You're something of a seamstress too, I hear.

0:07:08 > 0:07:10Tell me about this quilt.

0:07:10 > 0:07:13My mum would actually kill herself laughing

0:07:13 > 0:07:17if she could hear you saying that, but it's true, it is true.

0:07:17 > 0:07:20The quilt forms a kind of frame for the blog.

0:07:20 > 0:07:24I started it the same time as I started going out with Mand

0:07:24 > 0:07:28and they're the two threads that keep everything together.

0:07:28 > 0:07:30Well, it works.

0:07:30 > 0:07:34I had a read last night and, seriously, I was still sitting there two hours later.

0:07:34 > 0:07:37See, that is great that you get it...

0:07:37 > 0:07:39But what all readers will want to know,

0:07:39 > 0:07:43is how on earth you combine this with being a busy GP?

0:07:43 > 0:07:46Um...Trainee GP, actually.

0:07:46 > 0:07:47So when do you qualify?

0:07:49 > 0:07:51It's...

0:07:51 > 0:07:53I was...

0:07:53 > 0:07:57Well, it's... it's really complicated.

0:07:57 > 0:08:00OK. What area of medicine do you think you'll follow, then?

0:08:00 > 0:08:03Something to do with women's issues?

0:08:03 > 0:08:05Yeah!

0:08:05 > 0:08:09But just because she's a woman, she doesn't want to become ghettoised.

0:08:09 > 0:08:11She's just as popular with all her patients.

0:08:12 > 0:08:14So, Mandy. I hear you're a nurse...

0:08:17 > 0:08:20That's what we've been missing? A proper, old-school Heston night out.

0:08:20 > 0:08:23Really, it was more of a general suggestion.

0:08:23 > 0:08:26- Isn't it supposed to be Zara's big welcome back?- There you go.

0:08:26 > 0:08:30Some women lose their identities when they've had a baby. We can show her she's still part of the team.

0:08:30 > 0:08:35This is Zara we're talking about. She's not going to be sitting at home mashing organic carrots.

0:08:35 > 0:08:37Seven-week-old babies aren't on solids.

0:08:37 > 0:08:40All right, Cherry, let's not go on about it, hey.

0:08:40 > 0:08:43Mrs Westlake, if you'd like to come through?

0:08:47 > 0:08:50What were you doing? You've been ages.

0:08:50 > 0:08:51I couldn't do one.

0:08:51 > 0:08:52What do you mean?

0:08:52 > 0:08:54I can't help it if I don't need a wee.

0:08:54 > 0:08:56Tell the doctor, then. Excuse me.

0:08:56 > 0:08:59- She couldn't do you a thingy. - Ravi!

0:08:59 > 0:09:03Have you tried thinking of gushing waterfalls?

0:09:03 > 0:09:07It's OK. Take the bottle home and bring it in. But I can't prescribe anything till you do.

0:09:07 > 0:09:11- I'm ringing work for you - No. I've only been working there a few days, I can't pull a sickie.

0:09:11 > 0:09:13You can if you're genuinely ill

0:09:13 > 0:09:16I need the cash. I've got a load of books I need to buy this term.

0:09:16 > 0:09:18And Mum says I need to give you space to revise.

0:09:22 > 0:09:25Right, girls, let's keep you both on the sofa.

0:09:25 > 0:09:27Try and relax.

0:09:27 > 0:09:29Mandy, lean towards Freya a tad.

0:09:29 > 0:09:31Arm across the back.

0:09:31 > 0:09:35That's gorgeous. And look at each other.

0:09:37 > 0:09:40Great. What about with your laptop? Like you're doing your blog.

0:09:42 > 0:09:45OK. Mandy leaning over your shoulder.

0:09:45 > 0:09:48Keeping it natural, then?

0:09:49 > 0:09:51You are good at this, lady.

0:09:54 > 0:09:56Is this the famous Mill?

0:09:56 > 0:09:58If you need an appointment, you'll have to be quick.

0:09:58 > 0:10:00I don't.

0:10:00 > 0:10:03The chassis might look a bit rusty but it hasn't let me down yet.

0:10:03 > 0:10:06Is the incomparable Julia around?

0:10:06 > 0:10:08Oh. You must be...

0:10:08 > 0:10:11Martin Millar. You are?

0:10:11 > 0:10:13Karen Hollins.

0:10:13 > 0:10:16Look, if the car gets in the way my driver will move it.

0:10:16 > 0:10:18Oh well, I'll...

0:10:22 > 0:10:23Martin's here!

0:10:23 > 0:10:25What?

0:10:25 > 0:10:29He smells gorgeous, and he's come in a limo, look!

0:10:29 > 0:10:34What a cheek! Does he think he can roll up here and I'm going to drop everything?

0:10:34 > 0:10:35He's obviously smitten.

0:10:35 > 0:10:40Well, he didn't get that idea from me, I can assure you.

0:10:40 > 0:10:41What am I going to tell him?

0:10:41 > 0:10:44Tell him he can take his leather seats and mini-bar

0:10:44 > 0:10:46and find some other female.

0:10:53 > 0:10:55Mr Millar.

0:10:55 > 0:10:56Martin.

0:10:56 > 0:10:59Julia has got a prior engagement this evening,

0:10:59 > 0:11:01so she's not able to accept your invitation.

0:11:02 > 0:11:05Oh. That's a pity.

0:11:05 > 0:11:08I'd offer to step in, but my husband might have something to say!

0:11:08 > 0:11:12I'll just stick around, if that's OK, and say hello.

0:11:13 > 0:11:15Dr Daniel Granger, this is Martin Millar.

0:11:15 > 0:11:17Hi.

0:11:17 > 0:11:21Daniel's one of our doctors. His partner also works here and she's just had a little one.

0:11:21 > 0:11:23Is she going to meet us there?

0:11:23 > 0:11:24Er, excuse me.

0:11:26 > 0:11:29PHONE RINGS

0:11:30 > 0:11:32Yes?

0:11:32 > 0:11:34Aliona can't make it. She's going to a club.

0:11:34 > 0:11:35- Did you find somebody else? - A stranger?

0:11:35 > 0:11:38I don't know, Daniel. I left it in your hands.

0:11:38 > 0:11:40'I should have told you earlier. I'm sorry.'

0:11:40 > 0:11:43- I'll pass on your apologies to Heston, of course.- 'Excuse me.'

0:11:43 > 0:11:47I have spent all afternoon trying on various pre-pregnancy outfits

0:11:47 > 0:11:49and I am now dressed, heeled, glossed

0:11:49 > 0:11:53and ready for some conversation that doesn't involve leaking breasts.

0:11:53 > 0:11:55You want me to come home?

0:11:55 > 0:11:57Hooray! Let's give Daddy a medal.

0:11:57 > 0:12:00PHONE HANGS UP

0:12:01 > 0:12:03Come on, makeover time.

0:12:05 > 0:12:08Apologies, Heston I'm going to have to cry off, babysitting crisis.

0:12:08 > 0:12:10But Zara will be there.

0:12:10 > 0:12:14Part and parcel, welcome to the next 16 years.

0:12:14 > 0:12:16Dr Heston Carter, this is Martin Millar.

0:12:16 > 0:12:18- Hello.- How do you do?

0:12:18 > 0:12:19Friend of Julia's.

0:12:19 > 0:12:22Ah. Is that your fine piece of engineering out there?

0:12:22 > 0:12:24One of them.

0:12:24 > 0:12:25Martin owns a garage.

0:12:25 > 0:12:29- Really? Um, let me make you a cup of tea.- Oh, thank you.

0:12:29 > 0:12:31You don't know anything about Jags, do you?

0:12:31 > 0:12:32I do, actually.

0:12:36 > 0:12:38Whenever you're ready...

0:12:38 > 0:12:40I just love picking up soggy nachos on my own.

0:12:42 > 0:12:45You OK? You look awful.

0:12:45 > 0:12:47No offence.

0:12:47 > 0:12:51- I just threw up. I'm really sorry. - If you're that ill, you'll have to go home.

0:12:51 > 0:12:53I'll be better in a bit, if I just have a sit-down.

0:12:53 > 0:12:56- I'm going to have to call someone else in.- Just get me a painkiller... in my bag.

0:13:05 > 0:13:07- UNDER HIS BREATH:- Good night, was it?

0:13:07 > 0:13:13Being a receptionist is not just about making appointments, far from it.

0:13:13 > 0:13:17Today we have been collaborating to do stock-takes and risk assessments.

0:13:17 > 0:13:21You know, I once knew a woman who slipped on an oil spill and broke all her eggs.

0:13:21 > 0:13:23Hope you don't mind me asking,

0:13:23 > 0:13:27but you know how you've got a chauffeur, is that out of choice or necessity?

0:13:27 > 0:13:29Cherry!

0:13:29 > 0:13:31What? It's a fair enough question, isn't it?

0:13:31 > 0:13:34Most people I know who've got drivers is because they've been banned.

0:13:34 > 0:13:37I haven't been banned. Just blind.

0:13:38 > 0:13:40It's all right. I'm having you on.

0:13:40 > 0:13:44Have you seen that stonking great beast of a motor parked outside?

0:13:44 > 0:13:46- Kevin...the newest lamb in our flock.- Hi, Kevin.

0:13:46 > 0:13:49Right, all we all ready to rumble?

0:13:49 > 0:13:51It appears Julia is missing.

0:13:51 > 0:13:52I'll go.

0:14:02 > 0:14:04- She's not there. - She may have gone on ahead.

0:14:04 > 0:14:06Hope she's getting a round in, I'm gasping.

0:14:08 > 0:14:12Martin, if you're free tonight, you'll join us, won't you?

0:14:12 > 0:14:16- Well, seeing as my dinner date's made other plans, thanks, I'd love to.- Excellent.

0:14:16 > 0:14:19- Their loss is our gain. - Shotgun go in your car! - It's only round the corner.

0:14:19 > 0:14:20We'll go the long way round.

0:14:20 > 0:14:23ALARM BLARES Is that you leaving the stock cupboard open?

0:14:23 > 0:14:25It most certainly was not.

0:14:28 > 0:14:30- What are you doing?- Nothing. Nothing.

0:14:30 > 0:14:35I was just doing... I was doing a security check... I could have been a patient left in the loos.

0:14:35 > 0:14:39You should think about that before you lock up so quickly.

0:14:39 > 0:14:41- I checked the loos!- Whatever.

0:14:41 > 0:14:44Anyway, why are we all standing around here? Are we going to the Icon Bar?

0:14:44 > 0:14:47Works do, sorry.

0:14:47 > 0:14:49By a happy accident, your friend Martin is coming with.

0:14:49 > 0:14:53- But he's not...- Where have you been hiding him? I had no idea.

0:15:00 > 0:15:01What are you doing?

0:15:01 > 0:15:03I'm just doing my job.

0:15:03 > 0:15:05I thought it was just waitressing?

0:15:05 > 0:15:06I don't like you behind the bar.

0:15:06 > 0:15:10Chill out, Ravi, it's just one drink. Anyway why are you here checking up on me?

0:15:10 > 0:15:12You left this behind at your girl's night.

0:15:12 > 0:15:14One of your mates dropped it round.

0:15:14 > 0:15:18- Oh, yeah.- Bit divvy, wasn't it? Suppose Mum had been trying to call you?

0:15:18 > 0:15:21I know... We went to get some chips and I didn't have my handbag.

0:15:21 > 0:15:23And have you done your sample?

0:15:23 > 0:15:25- No.- Go and do it, then, and I'll take it in.

0:15:27 > 0:15:29It's too late, they'll be closed.

0:15:29 > 0:15:32Let's see how I am tomorrow, yeah?

0:15:32 > 0:15:34It'll probably sort itself out.

0:15:34 > 0:15:37- All right?- Yeah. How you doing?

0:15:37 > 0:15:39Ask me when the exams are over.

0:15:39 > 0:15:40Tell me about it.

0:15:40 > 0:15:44Go easy on this one. Make sure she finishes on time.

0:15:44 > 0:15:45I demand to see the manager.

0:15:45 > 0:15:48My mom. Sunpreet, champagne glasses.

0:15:48 > 0:15:51That's you. Geddit?

0:15:51 > 0:15:55- Champers all round. I trust you have it on ice, as requested.- Yes.

0:15:55 > 0:15:57- Let me get this. - No, don't be ridiculous.

0:15:57 > 0:16:00This is my gift to my colleagues who have shown such patience and loyalty.

0:16:00 > 0:16:02Ah!

0:16:02 > 0:16:04Why don't you just tell your brother you were out on the lash?

0:16:04 > 0:16:06- What do you mean? - Shot glasses in your bag?

0:16:06 > 0:16:09That wasn't me. I went to a club but I didn't drink anything.

0:16:11 > 0:16:13It's no big deal. Just don't come to work with a raging hangover.

0:16:13 > 0:16:15Don't even joke about it.

0:16:15 > 0:16:17- If Ravi was here and you said that! - What?

0:16:18 > 0:16:19You wouldn't understand.

0:16:21 > 0:16:25The cheek of the man! Crashing a private party.

0:16:25 > 0:16:26Heston invited him.

0:16:26 > 0:16:31Yeah? Well, look at him, worming his way in, anybody would think he was a long-lost friend or something.

0:16:31 > 0:16:33You could always chuck some champagne over him!

0:16:33 > 0:16:36No, don't want to waste good bubbles, do I!?

0:16:38 > 0:16:39Finally.

0:16:39 > 0:16:40Traffic.

0:16:40 > 0:16:41There you go.

0:16:41 > 0:16:43Hello.

0:16:43 > 0:16:46You might want a smell. I think he needs a nappy change.

0:16:48 > 0:16:49See you.

0:16:50 > 0:16:51Yes, you do.

0:16:51 > 0:16:54Sorry, sorry, we're late, the shoot took ages.

0:16:54 > 0:16:56How did it go?

0:16:56 > 0:16:59I was pretty fabulous... she said I was like a pro.

0:17:01 > 0:17:04- So when do we get to see it? - Any minute. She's going to email the proofs.

0:17:04 > 0:17:07Jack, another bottle of champagne for our media darlings.

0:17:07 > 0:17:09Sunpreet.

0:17:09 > 0:17:11Please, Mish, she's not picking up.

0:17:11 > 0:17:14You've got to find her and make her take it down. Mish?

0:17:16 > 0:17:18Oi! You're in the middle of a shift.

0:17:18 > 0:17:22Jack, me and Julia are moving on to Kir Royals.

0:17:22 > 0:17:24- The battery's dead. Can I borrow yours?- No!

0:17:24 > 0:17:26Please. It's really important.

0:17:26 > 0:17:29You're supposed to be grafting. Get me the cassis from up there, would you?

0:17:29 > 0:17:31Blackcurrant syrup.

0:17:33 > 0:17:34What the hell is that?

0:17:34 > 0:17:36Nothing.

0:17:36 > 0:17:39- Let's see.- No.

0:17:39 > 0:17:41Trust you to start without me.

0:17:41 > 0:17:44Last but not least. Are we on the bubbly tonight?

0:17:44 > 0:17:45You bet.

0:17:45 > 0:17:47I have expressed enough milk to feed a small country.

0:17:47 > 0:17:51- You must be Daniel's other half? - I think you'll find his better half. - Hi, I'm Martin.- Zara.

0:17:54 > 0:17:56Look, whatever's going on, sort it out.

0:18:04 > 0:18:06WINDOW SMASHES

0:18:08 > 0:18:11- Oh, they're in, they're in. - Come on - sneak preview!

0:18:14 > 0:18:16Oh.

0:18:16 > 0:18:19Oh... Mandy looks good.

0:18:19 > 0:18:21Next one.

0:18:21 > 0:18:23Definitely the right choice of outfit, babe.

0:18:23 > 0:18:26Yeah, the house looks lovely.

0:18:26 > 0:18:30Total respect, mate. Never seen anyone so un-photogenic.

0:18:32 > 0:18:33Cheers.

0:18:39 > 0:18:41SINGING ON VIDEO

0:18:43 > 0:18:46SINGING CONTINUES

0:18:50 > 0:18:54- Too many OJs, was it? - Don't tell Ravi.

0:18:54 > 0:18:55Bit late for that.

0:18:55 > 0:18:56I'm getting the film taken down.

0:18:56 > 0:18:59Stupid cow who put it on there.

0:18:59 > 0:19:02Yeah. Never a great idea having a mate less mullered than you.

0:19:02 > 0:19:05- Last thing you need is an action replay.- Please, Jack.

0:19:05 > 0:19:08- Ravi's on your course. If this gets back to him.- What's he going to do?

0:19:08 > 0:19:12Just be really disappointed. And my mum and dad.

0:19:12 > 0:19:13All they want is for me to work hard.

0:19:13 > 0:19:16- They all say that. - I don't know why I do it.

0:19:16 > 0:19:20Every time I wake up, I promise myself.

0:19:20 > 0:19:22But I just need to get out the flat, have fun.

0:19:22 > 0:19:24You and every other first year.

0:19:24 > 0:19:25But I always go too far.

0:19:25 > 0:19:28I don't know how I got home.

0:19:28 > 0:19:29I don't remember this.

0:19:30 > 0:19:33I look at myself and I know I'm disgusting.

0:19:33 > 0:19:35- You're not disgusting.- I am.

0:19:35 > 0:19:38- If Ravi finds out, he'll be so ashamed.- Look, you're just hung-over.

0:19:38 > 0:19:42I swear by a massive fry-up.

0:19:42 > 0:19:45But you'll have to make do with smoky bacon.

0:19:46 > 0:19:50Go on your break now, go on.

0:20:07 > 0:20:10No, this is totally unacceptable. You'll have to organise a re-shoot.

0:20:12 > 0:20:13What do you mean it's impossible?

0:20:13 > 0:20:19As the subject of your article, I should have the final say.

0:20:20 > 0:20:23No, it's me doing you the favour.

0:20:23 > 0:20:27And it's you behaving like an amateur. Right, back up!

0:20:27 > 0:20:31Me and my blog, I could've taken that to the nationals, so you better think about...

0:20:31 > 0:20:33Freya.

0:20:34 > 0:20:39Sorry, she's...had a bit of a stressful day.

0:20:47 > 0:20:50You've got your hands full with that lot.

0:20:51 > 0:20:54I think that's a bit of a cheek, commenting on my colleagues?

0:20:54 > 0:20:56After you took advantage of Heston's good nature.

0:20:56 > 0:20:58Well, how else was I going to see you?

0:20:59 > 0:21:02Well, you haven't seen much of me, have you?

0:21:02 > 0:21:05I thought you might break my kneecaps if I got too close.

0:21:05 > 0:21:08Probably too close now. Would you like me to go?

0:21:08 > 0:21:10I think that would be a bit self-defeating, don't you?

0:21:12 > 0:21:13Then, can I get you another drink?

0:21:15 > 0:21:17Thank you.

0:21:17 > 0:21:22Oi, Jack, what you done with my sister?

0:21:22 > 0:21:24- Eh?- She finishes her shift now, doesn't she?

0:21:25 > 0:21:27Wait there.

0:21:31 > 0:21:33I can't believe I called her an amateur.

0:21:33 > 0:21:35I could curl up and die.

0:21:35 > 0:21:38Oh, give over, I'm sure she's had worse than that before.

0:21:38 > 0:21:40What's happened to me, Mand?

0:21:40 > 0:21:43I write about sewing, I'm hardly Germaine Greer.

0:21:43 > 0:21:45It's because it matters to you.

0:21:47 > 0:21:49I'm just disappointed.

0:21:51 > 0:21:52I know you are, babe.

0:21:52 > 0:21:54I have my status...

0:21:54 > 0:21:58I've been practising it all day.

0:21:58 > 0:22:02"Check me out, suckers... get a glimpse into my perfect private life."

0:22:02 > 0:22:05My mum was going to have a field day.

0:22:05 > 0:22:09- I can call Cara - get her to pull the article.- No.

0:22:09 > 0:22:13No way. Look what's happened to me! I'm a monster!

0:22:13 > 0:22:17This has happened at the right time before my ego gets too big to fit through the door.

0:22:17 > 0:22:21What's one little article anyway? You've still got the blog.

0:22:21 > 0:22:23No. I'm killing the blog as soon as I get home.

0:22:23 > 0:22:25- KNOCK ON DOOR - Sunpreet?

0:22:27 > 0:22:29Sorry, ladies. Is there someone in there?

0:22:29 > 0:22:30Sunpreet?

0:22:39 > 0:22:41'What's wrong with her?'

0:22:41 > 0:22:43- She looks wasted. - How much alcohol has she had?

0:22:43 > 0:22:45None. She doesn't drink.

0:22:45 > 0:22:47Pulse is rapid.

0:22:47 > 0:22:50Has this ever happened before? Is she on any medication?

0:22:50 > 0:22:54- No... she saw the doctor this morning.- Dr Granger.

0:22:54 > 0:22:56He was going to give her some pills but she couldn't do a sample.

0:22:56 > 0:22:59A urinary sample? He thought she had a UTI?

0:22:59 > 0:23:01Wait, there's a massive bruise. >

0:23:01 > 0:23:04What? How'd she get one there?

0:23:04 > 0:23:07Possible abdominal trauma. Freya, call an ambulance.

0:23:07 > 0:23:09Sunpreet...wake up!

0:23:11 > 0:23:13It could be septicaemia.

0:23:13 > 0:23:15< She's just hung-over. I'm sorry,

0:23:15 > 0:23:18she was out on the lash last night, looked totally out of it.

0:23:18 > 0:23:20- She smashed into a bollard. - Were you with her?

0:23:20 > 0:23:22No. There's a video of it on the internet.

0:23:22 > 0:23:26- I don't think this is a hangover. - She could have a ruptured bladder. - What?

0:23:26 > 0:23:28What's a ruptured bladder?

0:23:28 > 0:23:30She got so drunk she forgot to have a wee,

0:23:30 > 0:23:32so her bladder just got more and more full.

0:23:32 > 0:23:35And when she hit the bollard it burst, basically.

0:23:38 > 0:23:41Elaine, you are never going to guess who I'm looking at

0:23:41 > 0:23:45cosying up to Julia, plying her with best champagne. Ring me back.

0:23:48 > 0:23:50Gosh, I must go. I've got a car auction tomorrow.

0:23:50 > 0:23:52Got to be sharp to beat the young ones.

0:23:52 > 0:23:55I think they'd have to be quick to catch you out.

0:23:56 > 0:23:57Can I see you again?

0:23:58 > 0:24:01Do you mean just me or another staff outing?

0:24:01 > 0:24:05I have got to visit my daughter over Easter,

0:24:05 > 0:24:07but can I ring you when I guess back?

0:24:07 > 0:24:09Yes.

0:24:20 > 0:24:23I've told the paramedics it's a suspected ruptured bladder

0:24:23 > 0:24:25induced by alcohol.

0:24:25 > 0:24:29- Is she going to be OK?- She'll need surgery. But hopefully we've caught it in time.

0:24:29 > 0:24:32You, my dear, are pooping your own party.

0:24:32 > 0:24:35Well, if my partner could make a proper diagnosis...

0:24:35 > 0:24:38It's not Daniel's fault, he could never have known.

0:24:38 > 0:24:39Where's the fun in that for me?

0:24:43 > 0:24:46It is weird. The one day that there's something to write about

0:24:46 > 0:24:47and I'm not going to blog.

0:24:47 > 0:24:50Yeah. It's a real shame, you know.

0:24:50 > 0:24:53All those girls going out, drinking like the lads,

0:24:53 > 0:24:57thinking the worse that can happen is losing their spray-tans.

0:24:58 > 0:25:01I could call it "Getting bladdered".

0:25:01 > 0:25:04See. That's why you've got a gift.

0:25:05 > 0:25:12- Do you think, though?- Look, you can blog. Just not all the time.

0:25:16 > 0:25:17Thank you.

0:25:21 > 0:25:23You need anything?

0:25:23 > 0:25:25You must think I'm really stupid.

0:25:26 > 0:25:28I've got a sister, they're nightmares.

0:25:28 > 0:25:31Don't know what my mum's going to say.

0:25:31 > 0:25:33Do you have to tell her?

0:25:33 > 0:25:34My sister...

0:25:34 > 0:25:38she gives me grey hairs sometimes, but at least I know what she's up to.

0:25:38 > 0:25:40Rather than her screwing things up on her own.

0:25:47 > 0:25:48I'm sorry.

0:25:48 > 0:25:50Shush, it's OK.

0:25:50 > 0:25:53- I lied to you. - Don't suppose I gave you any choice.

0:25:55 > 0:25:57I just never wanted to see you like this.

0:25:58 > 0:26:00I was only trying to protect you.

0:26:00 > 0:26:03I know. But because I wasn't allowed....

0:26:04 > 0:26:06I know. I know.

0:26:11 > 0:26:12Shh!

0:26:13 > 0:26:14Shh!

0:26:15 > 0:26:17GIGGLING

0:26:17 > 0:26:19Welcome to my humble abode.

0:26:23 > 0:26:25SHRIEKS OF LAUGHTER

0:26:44 > 0:26:45Candy from a baby.

0:26:45 > 0:26:46I don't like this, mate.

0:26:46 > 0:26:48Think I turned into a saint now I'm stuck in this?

0:26:48 > 0:26:51I think Doctor Carter has been robbed.

0:26:51 > 0:26:53You don't have to say anything though it may...

0:26:53 > 0:26:55What sort of state is the house in?

0:26:55 > 0:26:57Quite a mess.

0:26:57 > 0:27:00Sorry he's genuine. He's one of my patients.

0:27:00 > 0:27:01Right.

0:27:03 > 0:27:05Oh, my goodness!

0:27:22 > 0:27:25Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd