0:00:51 > 0:00:54GUITAR PLAYS IN THE BACKGROUND
0:01:14 > 0:01:15Barry!
0:01:15 > 0:01:18It's Gary. And it's one o'clock in the morning.
0:01:18 > 0:01:20What are you doing up so late?
0:01:20 > 0:01:22I can't sleep because someone keeps strumming.
0:01:22 > 0:01:25Ah, I do not strum. I pluck.
0:01:25 > 0:01:28Yes, well, could you perhaps show some consideration?
0:01:28 > 0:01:30I know that word.
0:01:30 > 0:01:32It's in the dictionary between condoms
0:01:32 > 0:01:34and I couldn't give a monkey's.
0:01:34 > 0:01:35HE CONTINUES PLAYING THE GUITAR
0:01:51 > 0:01:55Hi. I don't know if you remember me, my name's...
0:01:55 > 0:01:56Olwyn.
0:01:56 > 0:01:58Oh, you do! Right!
0:01:58 > 0:02:00And you've come to complain about the noise.
0:02:00 > 0:02:03No. I just wanted to say how great it was.
0:02:03 > 0:02:06I was sitting in my room, feeling a bit...bleh,
0:02:06 > 0:02:10and I suddenly heard this amazing sound.
0:02:10 > 0:02:12Oh.
0:02:12 > 0:02:13So where did you learn to play?
0:02:16 > 0:02:19I just sort of...picked it up.
0:02:22 > 0:02:24- Winifred...- Oh!
0:02:24 > 0:02:27- You forgot this.- Oh, thank you.
0:02:27 > 0:02:28You know, it'd make life much easier
0:02:28 > 0:02:31if you just left a toothbrush at the vicarage.
0:02:31 > 0:02:33But what would your cleaning lady say!?
0:02:33 > 0:02:37Well, Mrs Petrovsky can be surprisingly broad-minded.
0:02:37 > 0:02:40And if I am going to be embroiled in a scandal,
0:02:40 > 0:02:42I can't think of anyone I'd rather be embroiled with.
0:02:42 > 0:02:44SHE CHUCKLES
0:02:44 > 0:02:46I'd better love you and leave you.
0:02:50 > 0:02:51Gotcha.
0:02:56 > 0:02:57There you go.
0:02:57 > 0:02:59Thanks.
0:02:59 > 0:03:02Though your psoriasis does seem a bit worse than last time.
0:03:02 > 0:03:03Really?
0:03:03 > 0:03:05Are you under any stress at all?
0:03:05 > 0:03:08No, everything's fine.
0:03:08 > 0:03:11Except the global economy, global starvation, global warming.
0:03:11 > 0:03:14OK, well, we'll just keep an eye on it. Anything else?
0:03:14 > 0:03:15No, that's it.
0:03:18 > 0:03:20There was one thing.
0:03:20 > 0:03:21Yes?
0:03:22 > 0:03:26Have you got any, um...free condoms?
0:03:26 > 0:03:29I'm really sorry, we've run out, I think.
0:03:29 > 0:03:32Well, I need to get some.
0:03:32 > 0:03:33Right now.
0:03:36 > 0:03:38So, will you pass the message on to Daniel?
0:03:38 > 0:03:41I will do it on this occasion, but I am not a carrier pigeon.
0:03:41 > 0:03:44Did that man ever get back to you?
0:03:45 > 0:03:46What man?
0:03:46 > 0:03:49He was hanging round on Friday, I left you six messages.
0:03:49 > 0:03:51Yes, well, I...
0:03:51 > 0:03:53What did he look like?
0:03:53 > 0:03:55Um... He was about six foot,
0:03:55 > 0:03:57'he was black, quite handsome.
0:03:57 > 0:04:00'Funnily enough, he said his name was...'
0:04:03 > 0:04:04Winifred.
0:04:08 > 0:04:10It's been a long time.
0:04:10 > 0:04:13So, anyway, she's coming round for pizza this afternoon.
0:04:13 > 0:04:15And I don't know if anything's going to happen,
0:04:15 > 0:04:17but you can't be too careful.
0:04:17 > 0:04:21Hang on! You told this girl you were a virtuoso guitar player?
0:04:21 > 0:04:24She sort of...assumed.
0:04:24 > 0:04:26And I sort of said..."Hmm."
0:04:26 > 0:04:28It's called seizing the day.
0:04:28 > 0:04:29It's called lying.
0:04:29 > 0:04:31And how's she going to feel when she finds out?
0:04:31 > 0:04:34Why would she find out?
0:04:34 > 0:04:36Well, she might ask you to perform
0:04:36 > 0:04:38before she lets you...perform.
0:04:38 > 0:04:40I hadn't thought of that.
0:04:40 > 0:04:43Plus, if you do ever get to make sweet music,
0:04:43 > 0:04:46what happens if the guy next door suddenly starts playing?
0:04:46 > 0:04:49Well, I'll just have to find a way to make him stop.
0:04:49 > 0:04:51You have to stop lying!
0:04:51 > 0:04:53Apart from anything else, it's just wrong.
0:04:53 > 0:04:57Well, I think it's wrong that guys like Javier always get the girl.
0:04:57 > 0:05:00Just because he's got a suntan and a nice accent
0:05:00 > 0:05:03- and the body of a Greek god...- Right.
0:05:03 > 0:05:06For the past year, I've seen Olwyn.
0:05:06 > 0:05:08Bumping along on her bicycle.
0:05:08 > 0:05:10Brushing past me in the corridor.
0:05:10 > 0:05:14And last night, for the first time, she seemed to notice me.
0:05:14 > 0:05:19It was as if that passionate guitar music stirred something in her.
0:05:19 > 0:05:24OK, well, she clearly likes that kind of music, so here's an idea.
0:05:24 > 0:05:25What?
0:05:25 > 0:05:28Pop into the university bookshop and buy her a CD, they've got loads.
0:05:28 > 0:05:31And tell her you're very sorry,
0:05:31 > 0:05:34you got a bit carried away last night, and no, you can't play,
0:05:34 > 0:05:36but as you know she likes that kind of music...
0:05:36 > 0:05:37But won't she be angry that I lied?
0:05:37 > 0:05:41Maybe, but if you keep on lying, it'll come back to bite you.
0:05:41 > 0:05:46So come clean, say sorry, relax, be yourself
0:05:46 > 0:05:48and let the real Gary shine through.
0:05:53 > 0:05:55Uh...Dr Carter will see you now.
0:05:55 > 0:05:56OK, thank you.
0:06:02 > 0:06:03So...
0:06:04 > 0:06:06..how are you?
0:06:06 > 0:06:08That is none of your business.
0:06:08 > 0:06:11Mrs Tembe, I'm just popping over to the campus for an hour.
0:06:11 > 0:06:13Yes, Dr Carter.
0:06:13 > 0:06:15I mean...
0:06:15 > 0:06:16Mr Bellamy.
0:06:20 > 0:06:22This is my place of work.
0:06:22 > 0:06:24We need to talk.
0:06:27 > 0:06:33There is a place, up the road, it's called the Icon Bar.
0:06:33 > 0:06:35I will meet you there in half an hour.
0:06:37 > 0:06:38Fine. I will see you there.
0:06:53 > 0:06:56GUITAR MUSIC PLAYS
0:07:10 > 0:07:11Ole!
0:07:12 > 0:07:15HOOVERING OUTSIDE
0:07:33 > 0:07:34KNOCKING ON DOOR
0:07:34 > 0:07:35Come in!
0:07:39 > 0:07:40Howard!
0:07:40 > 0:07:44I've just been talking to Kevin, about last week,
0:07:44 > 0:07:46and your little bit of "radio activity".
0:07:46 > 0:07:50I know. Scott Mills has got nothing to worry about.
0:07:50 > 0:07:52It's not funny.
0:07:52 > 0:07:54I'm sorry, but I had a go
0:07:54 > 0:07:59and, sometimes, if at first you don't succeed, give up.
0:07:59 > 0:08:02There's no point making a complete pillock of yourself.
0:08:02 > 0:08:03Fair enough.
0:08:03 > 0:08:06I'd love to do it, just haven't got the time.
0:08:06 > 0:08:09Well, the slot is still there if anybody else wants to have a go.
0:08:09 > 0:08:12I'm sure Heston would do it.
0:08:12 > 0:08:14He's always up for a bit of fun.
0:08:14 > 0:08:17Not unless you want a show about the dangers of too much claret.
0:08:17 > 0:08:19Al?
0:08:19 > 0:08:22Definitely got the face for radio.
0:08:23 > 0:08:26No, we need somebody who's more reliable.
0:08:26 > 0:08:28Not too up themselves...
0:08:28 > 0:08:29Softly-spoken.
0:08:34 > 0:08:36This is good. This is so good.
0:08:36 > 0:08:39I've, um...I've got something for you.
0:08:39 > 0:08:40Really?
0:08:44 > 0:08:46Oh, that's so kind! You really shouldn't have.
0:08:46 > 0:08:49Well, there's something I need to tell you.
0:08:49 > 0:08:51Let me guess! This is your CD.
0:08:51 > 0:08:53You're a flamenco superstar!
0:08:53 > 0:08:55No, I'm...
0:08:58 > 0:09:00It's my dad.
0:09:00 > 0:09:01He's Spanish.
0:09:01 > 0:09:04He's the number-one flamenco artist in Fuengirola.
0:09:06 > 0:09:08Barry! Was it you who stole my guitar?
0:09:08 > 0:09:10Why would I do that?
0:09:10 > 0:09:13- Because you were complaining when I was playing last night.- Last night?
0:09:13 > 0:09:15He was doing a bit of plucking.
0:09:15 > 0:09:17No, I did not steal your guitar
0:09:17 > 0:09:20and, since the cleaning lady leaves all our rooms open,
0:09:20 > 0:09:22there are quite a lot of suspects.
0:09:22 > 0:09:25Fine, but believe me, I have my eye on you.
0:09:29 > 0:09:31He didn't seem too happy.
0:09:31 > 0:09:33It's the Spanish temperament.
0:09:33 > 0:09:36We can be quite...passionate.
0:09:37 > 0:09:39So, tell me about your dad.
0:09:41 > 0:09:44That's a bit tricky. I never really knew him.
0:09:44 > 0:09:46Oh?
0:09:46 > 0:09:49My mother met him at a tapas bar in Torremolinos.
0:09:49 > 0:09:52They made sweet music and then...
0:09:52 > 0:09:53hasta manana!
0:09:54 > 0:09:57Oh, I'm so sorry.
0:09:57 > 0:09:58That's why I learned to play.
0:09:58 > 0:10:00To try and feel in touch with him.
0:10:02 > 0:10:03Aw!
0:10:03 > 0:10:05I'll go and get my guitar.
0:10:08 > 0:10:10See if my fingers can do their magic.
0:10:17 > 0:10:19You're not going to believe this.
0:10:19 > 0:10:21- What?- Mine's been stolen too.
0:10:40 > 0:10:42This is nice.
0:10:44 > 0:10:48A long way from your Uncle Thabani's shack in Gaborone.
0:10:48 > 0:10:49What do you want?
0:10:51 > 0:10:52I've got some paperwork for you.
0:10:52 > 0:10:54What is it?
0:10:54 > 0:10:56Divorce proceedings.
0:10:57 > 0:10:58What?
0:10:58 > 0:11:01You left in rather a hurry.
0:11:01 > 0:11:03We did not have time to end things properly.
0:11:04 > 0:11:07But why have you taken so long to do this?
0:11:10 > 0:11:11I'm getting remarried.
0:11:15 > 0:11:16You are getting remarried?
0:11:18 > 0:11:20Don't you want to know who to?
0:11:20 > 0:11:23No, no, I am not interested.
0:11:23 > 0:11:26It is your life. Just show me where to sign.
0:11:26 > 0:11:28Fine.
0:11:30 > 0:11:32- There you go.- Thanks!
0:11:32 > 0:11:35And are you coping OK without the antidepressants?
0:11:35 > 0:11:39I'm fine, thanks. And I'm feeling much better in myself.
0:11:39 > 0:11:41Oh, yes?
0:11:41 > 0:11:44Well, you know, I've had the year from hell.
0:11:44 > 0:11:48My dad died, I failed my exams and then, my boyfriend dumped me.
0:11:48 > 0:11:50I know, it's been tough.
0:11:50 > 0:11:53But I think I've turned the corner.
0:11:53 > 0:11:56And I've met this really nice guy.
0:11:56 > 0:11:58Really?
0:11:58 > 0:12:00You're not going to believe this.
0:12:00 > 0:12:04I was sitting in my room last night, feeling sorry for myself,
0:12:04 > 0:12:08and I suddenly heard this amazing guitar music.
0:12:10 > 0:12:14- Right.- So I nipped downstairs to say "bravo",
0:12:14 > 0:12:18and it turns out it's this guy that I see all the time.
0:12:18 > 0:12:21He's always in the cafe, the launderette,
0:12:21 > 0:12:23wherever I am, he is there.
0:12:23 > 0:12:24What a coincidence.
0:12:24 > 0:12:26But I never knew he was so talented.
0:12:26 > 0:12:29And then, today, he gave me a CD.
0:12:29 > 0:12:35- Oh, yes?- It turns out his dad is a major recording artist,
0:12:35 > 0:12:38but they've never met, so when he plays,
0:12:38 > 0:12:43it's like he's trying to reach out to the dad he never knew.
0:12:43 > 0:12:46That is...unbelievable.
0:12:49 > 0:12:50There.
0:12:50 > 0:12:54- Thank you.- Now, I really must be getting back to work.
0:12:54 > 0:12:57Don't you want to know where I have been these past ten years?
0:12:57 > 0:13:00No, no, I do not. You...you have got what you came for.
0:13:00 > 0:13:01Not quite.
0:13:01 > 0:13:03I want an apology.
0:13:06 > 0:13:08You want an apology!?
0:13:08 > 0:13:09You hurt me.
0:13:09 > 0:13:11And you hurt me.
0:13:11 > 0:13:13But I didn't mean to.
0:13:13 > 0:13:15We both said some things that we did not mean,
0:13:15 > 0:13:18but I cannot apologise, because it would be a lie.
0:13:18 > 0:13:21Yes. I know all about your morality.
0:13:21 > 0:13:23The things...
0:13:23 > 0:13:27The things I did were because you betrayed me,
0:13:27 > 0:13:28you humiliated me...
0:13:28 > 0:13:29Ta.
0:13:31 > 0:13:34Excuse me, I just need to go to the bathroom.
0:13:36 > 0:13:39Dr Tyler! Please, you need to take me back to the Mill now.
0:13:39 > 0:13:43- Aren't you going to introduce me to your friend?- Now, please.
0:13:48 > 0:13:50MOBILE PHONE RINGS
0:13:51 > 0:13:53Hello?
0:13:53 > 0:13:55Gary, it's Dr Khella here, at the campus surgery.
0:13:55 > 0:13:57Oh.
0:13:57 > 0:13:59Just to let you know we now have condoms.
0:13:59 > 0:14:00Right.
0:14:00 > 0:14:03So. How's it going with Olwyn?
0:14:05 > 0:14:07Fine. Great.
0:14:07 > 0:14:08Did you give her the CD?
0:14:08 > 0:14:10Um, yes.
0:14:10 > 0:14:12And what did she think?
0:14:12 > 0:14:15She, um...
0:14:15 > 0:14:18she seems to think it's a recording of my dad.
0:14:18 > 0:14:20Oh! And why's that?
0:14:20 > 0:14:21Because I told her.
0:14:21 > 0:14:22KNOCKING ON DOOR
0:14:22 > 0:14:24Got to go.
0:14:24 > 0:14:25Gary?
0:14:33 > 0:14:35- Hello, you.- Hi.
0:14:35 > 0:14:36Guess what I've got?
0:14:38 > 0:14:39Ta-da!
0:14:39 > 0:14:41Oh.
0:14:41 > 0:14:44I saw it in the charity shop. It was only five pounds.
0:14:44 > 0:14:46You really shouldn't have.
0:14:46 > 0:14:49So, come on, Mr Music Man.
0:14:49 > 0:14:51Let's see your fingers do something magical.
0:14:51 > 0:14:54Yes, a few arpeggios.
0:14:54 > 0:14:58But first, I must just make a cup of tea.
0:14:59 > 0:15:01HE CHUCKLES
0:15:09 > 0:15:11So, I think it would be a wonderful opportunity
0:15:11 > 0:15:13to reach out to young people.
0:15:13 > 0:15:15What is it you want me to do?
0:15:15 > 0:15:17I want you to be...
0:15:17 > 0:15:18a radio presenter.
0:15:21 > 0:15:22Hello, Dr Jimmi!
0:15:22 > 0:15:24SHE LAUGHS
0:15:24 > 0:15:25You are joking?
0:15:25 > 0:15:26Well, not full time, obviously.
0:15:26 > 0:15:29Just once a week, on student radio.
0:15:29 > 0:15:32- Not until hell freezes over. - Oh, come on, you'd be good at it.
0:15:32 > 0:15:33You'd get lots of fans.
0:15:33 > 0:15:35You could be the Welsh Wogan.
0:15:35 > 0:15:38Not a chance. I suggest you do your homework, mate.
0:16:01 > 0:16:03HE SCREAMS
0:16:04 > 0:16:06Nice lunch, Mrs Tembe?
0:16:06 > 0:16:09Yes, lovely, thank you, Howard, yes.
0:16:09 > 0:16:10- No idea.- Ah, Daniel.
0:16:10 > 0:16:13I've just been speaking to Jimmi about this radio thing.
0:16:13 > 0:16:16And he reacted as if I'd asked him to set fire to his own granny.
0:16:16 > 0:16:19Yeah, OK, you really...you don't want to do that.
0:16:19 > 0:16:20Why not?
0:16:20 > 0:16:22Because a couple of years ago, he did have a radio show
0:16:22 > 0:16:24and it didn't go very well.
0:16:24 > 0:16:26Oh, yeah, I'm glad it's not just me that messes things up.
0:16:26 > 0:16:28Yeah, he had a... He had a bad experience.
0:16:28 > 0:16:30Well, we all have bad days.
0:16:30 > 0:16:31MOBILE PHONE RINGS
0:16:31 > 0:16:33- It's how you learn from them that counts.- Hi, Zara...
0:16:33 > 0:16:37I don't think it's a good idea... Zara, just give me... Yes.
0:16:38 > 0:16:41I've just seen Dr Granger,
0:16:41 > 0:16:46he says that last time you did a radio show it didn't go too well.
0:16:46 > 0:16:48He did, did he?
0:16:48 > 0:16:52Well, I understand that, sometimes, when I open my mouth,
0:16:52 > 0:16:55- I can come out with a load of gibberish.- Never noticed.
0:16:55 > 0:16:58Come on, why don't you give it another go?
0:16:58 > 0:16:59Get back on your microphone.
0:17:02 > 0:17:03HE SIGHS
0:17:03 > 0:17:04OK.
0:17:06 > 0:17:08Right.
0:17:09 > 0:17:12My show went well. I had lots of listeners. In fact, two siblings liked it so much,
0:17:12 > 0:17:14they decided to kidnap me.
0:17:14 > 0:17:17They chained me to a radiator for three weeks, fed me from a dog bowl.
0:17:17 > 0:17:20And I was mostly out of it cos they kept me on sleeping pills.
0:17:25 > 0:17:26Come on...
0:17:30 > 0:17:31Seriously?
0:17:34 > 0:17:37So how did it happen?
0:17:37 > 0:17:40I don't think the lid was on properly.
0:17:40 > 0:17:42I just went to pour, and whoosh!
0:17:42 > 0:17:44You should sue them.
0:17:44 > 0:17:45What?
0:17:45 > 0:17:47The university. You see it all the time,
0:17:47 > 0:17:49"Have you had an accident that wasn't your fault?"
0:17:49 > 0:17:52I know, but maybe it was my fault.
0:17:52 > 0:17:57Maybe I'm just a bit clumsy and things fall apart when I touch them.
0:17:57 > 0:17:59Can we just have a moment alone?
0:18:00 > 0:18:01I'll wait outside.
0:18:05 > 0:18:06What do you think you were doing?!
0:18:06 > 0:18:09I did what any musician would have done - improvised.
0:18:09 > 0:18:11You've got severe burns, genius.
0:18:11 > 0:18:14I had to do something that would make it impossible to play the guitar.
0:18:14 > 0:18:17Why stop there? Why not shove your fingers in a mincing machine?
0:18:17 > 0:18:19Do you know what it's like to want someone?
0:18:19 > 0:18:21And she lives in the room above me.
0:18:21 > 0:18:23So every day, I hear her coming and going,
0:18:23 > 0:18:27and I curse the ceiling that separates us.
0:18:27 > 0:18:29But then, one night, she comes down to say,
0:18:29 > 0:18:32"Oh, I loved your music, where did you learn to play?"
0:18:32 > 0:18:36What was I meant to say? "Javier lives in room four."
0:18:36 > 0:18:38You still have a chance with Olwyn.
0:18:38 > 0:18:41She's a lovely girl and things still might happen.
0:18:41 > 0:18:45But you have got to start telling the truth.
0:18:45 > 0:18:46Gary?
0:18:47 > 0:18:49Have you got those condoms?
0:18:50 > 0:18:54So that's what I was doing Christmas 2009.
0:18:54 > 0:18:55Who were these people?
0:18:55 > 0:18:57Just two very damaged individuals
0:18:57 > 0:19:01who thought that it'd be nice if Dr Jimmi from the radio could come and live with them.
0:19:01 > 0:19:02I had no idea.
0:19:02 > 0:19:05It's not exactly what you put on a T-shirt, is it?
0:19:05 > 0:19:07I feel awful.
0:19:07 > 0:19:09It's fine, just don't ask me again.
0:19:09 > 0:19:11Right, I'm going to go to the Icon.
0:19:11 > 0:19:12Can I get you anything?
0:19:12 > 0:19:15A large portion of humble pie?
0:19:16 > 0:19:18How's the invalid?
0:19:18 > 0:19:20Still throbbing.
0:19:20 > 0:19:23I wish there was something I could do to take my mind off the pain.
0:19:23 > 0:19:26- Hello there.- Hi.
0:19:26 > 0:19:28What happened to you?
0:19:28 > 0:19:31I was making a cup of tea and I scalded myself.
0:19:31 > 0:19:32You lead a dangerous life
0:19:32 > 0:19:35- with your cups of tea and your chocolate biscuits.- I know!
0:19:35 > 0:19:38As Gary can't play at the moment,
0:19:38 > 0:19:40why don't you give us a tune?
0:19:40 > 0:19:42Cos some bandido has stolen my guitar.
0:19:42 > 0:19:45Gary's got a spare. Give me the key, I'll go and get it.
0:19:58 > 0:19:59She seems a nice girl.
0:19:59 > 0:20:01Yeah, she is.
0:20:01 > 0:20:03So what is she doing with a creep like you?
0:20:03 > 0:20:05Because I've got something that you'll never have.
0:20:05 > 0:20:07Halitosis?
0:20:07 > 0:20:09Ha-ha-ha(!)
0:20:09 > 0:20:10Here you go.
0:20:12 > 0:20:15Oh, that's a nice guitar.
0:20:15 > 0:20:17Let's see if I can make this baby squeal.
0:20:32 > 0:20:33Er... What was that for?
0:20:35 > 0:20:36I'm sorry.
0:20:36 > 0:20:37I just can't bear the thought
0:20:37 > 0:20:41that he can play and I might never play again.
0:20:42 > 0:20:44Can we just go to my room?
0:20:46 > 0:20:47OK.
0:21:02 > 0:21:03Thank you.
0:21:03 > 0:21:06OK, I'm going to ask you something.
0:21:06 > 0:21:08All right.
0:21:08 > 0:21:13And think very carefully, because I hate it when people lie to me.
0:21:16 > 0:21:20Can you or can you not play the guitar?
0:21:26 > 0:21:27Not really.
0:21:29 > 0:21:31So why have you been fibbing to me?
0:21:31 > 0:21:33Because...
0:21:35 > 0:21:39..for nine months, I've been looking for a way to get close to you,
0:21:39 > 0:21:42but I've been too shy or you were with someone else.
0:21:43 > 0:21:46And then, last night, when you asked me where I learned to play,
0:21:46 > 0:21:50I thought, "She might like me if I was a guitarist."
0:21:50 > 0:21:53And you burnt your hand to stop me from finding out?
0:21:55 > 0:21:57I didn't want to disappoint you.
0:21:58 > 0:22:00You are...
0:22:00 > 0:22:02a lovely...
0:22:03 > 0:22:05..lovely, ridiculous man.
0:22:16 > 0:22:17Thank you.
0:22:23 > 0:22:24Thank you.
0:22:24 > 0:22:27Please, can you stop saying thank you?
0:22:38 > 0:22:41Whoa! Why have you got so many?
0:22:41 > 0:22:43I was a Boy Scout.
0:22:43 > 0:22:45I mean, not that we ever...
0:22:45 > 0:22:47"Be prepared."
0:22:47 > 0:22:48Right.
0:22:50 > 0:22:52Hang on, is this your guitar?
0:22:52 > 0:22:54No, just put that back...
0:22:54 > 0:22:55Barry?
0:22:57 > 0:22:59That's my guitar, you stupid dog-faced idiot.
0:22:59 > 0:23:02Sorry! I'm really sorry!
0:23:02 > 0:23:04- If you could just fill out this form.- Thank you.
0:23:06 > 0:23:09Please, I have given you what you came for.
0:23:09 > 0:23:10Not everything.
0:23:10 > 0:23:13I have nothing more to say to you.
0:23:13 > 0:23:15You have already ruined my life once.
0:23:15 > 0:23:17You are not going to do that again.
0:23:17 > 0:23:19- I didn't mean to...- Oh, hello!
0:23:19 > 0:23:21I see you finally met up!
0:23:21 > 0:23:26- Yes, though it's very hard with Winifred's busy schedule.- Aw!
0:23:26 > 0:23:27Well, I tell you what,
0:23:27 > 0:23:30why don't I make you a cup of tea till she has a break?
0:23:30 > 0:23:33- Mrs Hollins, there is really no need!- It's not a bother!
0:23:33 > 0:23:36If I can't do that for you, what are friends for? Come on.
0:23:42 > 0:23:44And just one bit more.
0:23:44 > 0:23:46Agh!
0:23:46 > 0:23:48Does your mouth hurt?
0:23:48 > 0:23:49Only when I smile.
0:23:49 > 0:23:52Which I'm not likely to do in the near future.
0:23:52 > 0:23:55Well, I don't condone violence, but you can sort of see why he lost it.
0:23:55 > 0:23:57Yes, I know!
0:23:57 > 0:24:01And now I'm going to have to move out, cos I have a horrible feeling
0:24:01 > 0:24:05Olwyn and Javier might be about...to do a duet together.
0:24:05 > 0:24:08I did say, "Tell the truth or it will come back to bite you."
0:24:08 > 0:24:09I know that now.
0:24:11 > 0:24:13Please, I will take over.
0:24:13 > 0:24:15Don't be daft, you go get the phone.
0:24:15 > 0:24:18I will only be one minute.
0:24:19 > 0:24:23All right. Mrs T has got some redbush here.
0:24:23 > 0:24:25That's what you like, isn't it?
0:24:25 > 0:24:27You never did say how you know each other.
0:24:27 > 0:24:31Well, until two hours ago, I was her husband.
0:24:35 > 0:24:37And what did she say?
0:24:38 > 0:24:40She didn't say we were divorced?
0:24:43 > 0:24:45She didn't say that I was dead, did she?
0:24:47 > 0:24:48Thank you, Mrs Hollins, I...
0:24:55 > 0:24:56I'll...I'll leave you to catch up.
0:25:04 > 0:25:07- Just wait here a minute.- Right.
0:25:07 > 0:25:08Any post?
0:25:14 > 0:25:16Snap!
0:25:16 > 0:25:17SHE CHUCKLES
0:25:17 > 0:25:18Hi, I'm Gary.
0:25:20 > 0:25:22I won't ask how you got yours.
0:25:23 > 0:25:25I was mugged.
0:25:25 > 0:25:28I know it looks bad, but you should see the other fella.
0:25:29 > 0:25:32- OK. Mr Singh, if you'd like to go through.- Thank you.
0:25:34 > 0:25:37Hiya. Is...is Winifred around?
0:25:39 > 0:25:42Um... Well, she was, but...she had to go out.
0:25:42 > 0:25:45Oh! Do you know when she'll be back?
0:25:45 > 0:25:46No-one knows.
0:25:46 > 0:25:50Right. Well, I've got time. I'll wait in the staff room.
0:25:50 > 0:25:51No!
0:25:51 > 0:25:54'You barge into my workplace, and humiliate me...!'
0:25:54 > 0:25:55- What's going on?- She's a bit busy!
0:25:55 > 0:25:58You know about humiliation, don't you, Winifred?
0:25:58 > 0:25:59What is this?
0:25:59 > 0:26:01I'm so sorry.
0:26:01 > 0:26:03I'm Gordon. Gordon Clements.
0:26:03 > 0:26:04Thomas.
0:26:06 > 0:26:07Thomas Tembe.
0:26:09 > 0:26:11This man is...
0:26:13 > 0:26:15This man is...is...
0:26:17 > 0:26:19I am her ex-husband.
0:26:19 > 0:26:23The husband she felt so ashamed of she told everyone I was dead.
0:26:33 > 0:26:34Is this true?
0:26:35 > 0:26:37SHE CRIES
0:26:40 > 0:26:41Is it?
0:27:05 > 0:27:07We're talking about a case
0:27:07 > 0:27:09of Chateau Margaux.
0:27:09 > 0:27:11That sounds expensive.
0:27:11 > 0:27:12How can you possibly not know
0:27:12 > 0:27:14what my husband looks like?
0:27:14 > 0:27:15Well, to be fair,
0:27:15 > 0:27:17- I hardly recognised you.- I know!
0:27:17 > 0:27:19She thinks you're a liar and a thief.
0:27:21 > 0:27:23SHE MOANS
0:27:26 > 0:27:27SHE CRIES
0:27:48 > 0:27:52Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd