0:00:28 > 0:00:29If we don't make a decision soon,
0:00:29 > 0:00:31we'll never going to get a reservation.
0:00:31 > 0:00:34I know, I know. How about "Mmm."
0:00:34 > 0:00:37- Mmm?- That's what it's called, "Mmm."
0:00:41 > 0:00:45Oh, no, it's got the word "eatery" in the title.
0:00:45 > 0:00:47I hate that word.
0:00:47 > 0:00:49I mean, you wouldn't call a hotel a sleepery, would you?
0:00:49 > 0:00:51Hey, if it's good grub you're after,
0:00:51 > 0:00:53an ex-army friend of mine runs a restaurant.
0:00:53 > 0:00:55If you value your friendship,
0:00:55 > 0:00:57- I'd keep us well away from his restaurant.- Why's that, then?
0:00:57 > 0:01:00Because we're going to write the most appalling review.
0:01:00 > 0:01:02Brilliant, but appalling.
0:01:02 > 0:01:03Again, why?
0:01:03 > 0:01:05Because no-one wants to read a good review.
0:01:05 > 0:01:09Anyway, just to be on the safe side, what's it called?
0:01:09 > 0:01:11It's called Grayze'
0:01:11 > 0:01:12You see he's called Gray...
0:01:13 > 0:01:16- and people graze.- Ah(!)
0:01:16 > 0:01:18Yes... No, no, no... We get it.
0:01:18 > 0:01:19Do they serve grass?
0:01:19 > 0:01:22Today's finest mowings!
0:01:22 > 0:01:25THEY LAUGH
0:01:26 > 0:01:27Maybe we should go there.
0:01:27 > 0:01:29Oh, Gaffer, this is for you.
0:01:29 > 0:01:30When did this arrive?
0:01:30 > 0:01:33I don't know. This morning, I suppose.
0:01:33 > 0:01:35Why didn't anybody tell me?!
0:01:35 > 0:01:37Oh, don't tell me you're nervous.
0:01:37 > 0:01:41Of course I am, I haven't been on a blind date since... Well, never.
0:01:41 > 0:01:44- What?- He is a nice guy, isn't he?
0:01:44 > 0:01:47No, no, he's a psychopath. Oh, relax, Vish is lovely.
0:01:48 > 0:01:51In fact, I'd go for him myself if I batted for your side.
0:01:51 > 0:01:53Or is it the other side?
0:01:53 > 0:01:56The same side. If you're straight.
0:01:56 > 0:01:58- Are you sure? - Can we talk about me, please?
0:01:58 > 0:02:00I couldn't decide what to wear this morning,
0:02:00 > 0:02:02so I brought a bunch of stuff with me.
0:02:02 > 0:02:04Ooh! Stuff, stuff? Take me to the stuff.
0:02:04 > 0:02:06It's in my consulting room.
0:02:06 > 0:02:08- Well, what are we stood here for? Go, go, go, go, go!- Stuff?
0:02:08 > 0:02:12Erm, I think this is a girls-only kind of thing, Al.
0:02:12 > 0:02:14Whatever. Like I'm interested
0:02:14 > 0:02:18in what Jas is going to wear to her blind date.
0:02:21 > 0:02:23Ta-da!
0:02:23 > 0:02:25Oh...
0:02:25 > 0:02:28I'm not being funny, but why even bother changing?
0:02:28 > 0:02:31What do you mean? Because it's...
0:02:33 > 0:02:35I don't know. OK.
0:02:35 > 0:02:39How about...this one?
0:02:39 > 0:02:43Seriously, was there like a two-for-one on or something?
0:02:43 > 0:02:46This is completely different. Look at the material, the pockets...
0:02:46 > 0:02:49Come on! Show him a bit of leg, a bit of boobage.
0:02:49 > 0:02:51He's not a boob man, is he?
0:02:51 > 0:02:53Yeah! Of course he is, he's a bloke.
0:02:53 > 0:02:59OK, I do have this one other thing, but it's not very me.
0:02:59 > 0:03:01Why, is it charcoal instead of black?
0:03:06 > 0:03:08Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner.
0:03:10 > 0:03:13Managed to find a decent enough restaurant to ruin the reputation of?
0:03:13 > 0:03:17- We certainly have. It's called... Au Jus.- Oh Zhoo?
0:03:17 > 0:03:19It's a posh word for gravy.
0:03:19 > 0:03:22We've decided that anywhere so pretentious
0:03:22 > 0:03:23will have an overpriced menu,
0:03:23 > 0:03:28microscopic morsels piled impossibly high on a bed of puree.
0:03:28 > 0:03:30Nouvelle cuisine, is so passe.
0:03:30 > 0:03:33Well, it's just another word for glorified garnish.
0:03:33 > 0:03:35- Tres droll!- Have a terrible night.
0:03:35 > 0:03:37Thank you very much. How about this,
0:03:37 > 0:03:40"The only reason to return to Au Jus would be a forgotten umbrella".
0:03:40 > 0:03:41Oh, bravissimo!
0:03:44 > 0:03:46Nice dress!
0:03:46 > 0:03:48It's not too much, is it? For a first date?
0:03:48 > 0:03:52- Are you mad? It is perfect.- Al?
0:03:52 > 0:03:54Yeah. Yeah, you look all... You look all right.
0:03:54 > 0:03:57This is stupid, I shouldn't feel so nervous.
0:03:57 > 0:03:58Oh, you'll be fine.
0:03:58 > 0:04:00Just have a glass of wine when you get there. Come on.
0:04:00 > 0:04:02- Have a nice weekend.- Bye!
0:04:08 > 0:04:12Well, that's everyone else's weekend planned. What you got lined up?
0:04:12 > 0:04:15A date with a pizza, a bottle of beer and a DVD.
0:04:15 > 0:04:18Ah, so that's what this is. May I?
0:04:18 > 0:04:20Fill your boots!
0:04:21 > 0:04:25Shut up! Game of Thrones: Season Two.
0:04:25 > 0:04:28Yes, I've seen Season One. It's genius.
0:04:28 > 0:04:30It's incredible. There's this new character called Brienne,
0:04:30 > 0:04:33this beautiful blonde girl in a suit of armour and a massive sword.
0:04:33 > 0:04:34She will destroy you!
0:04:34 > 0:04:38Oh, my word. You know, the trick is to eat first.
0:04:38 > 0:04:39That way you don't miss a frame.
0:04:39 > 0:04:41I had no idea you were such a massive nerd!
0:04:41 > 0:04:43What's nerdy about women with swords?
0:04:43 > 0:04:44HE SNORTS
0:04:44 > 0:04:46What?
0:04:47 > 0:04:49CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS
0:04:49 > 0:04:50Lovely!
0:04:50 > 0:04:54Good evening. Table for two, Chase-Torrent.
0:04:54 > 0:04:56Certainly, right this way.
0:05:04 > 0:05:05Thank you.
0:05:08 > 0:05:10Have a lovely evening.
0:05:10 > 0:05:11- Thank you.- Thank you.
0:05:14 > 0:05:16Good evening, and welcome to Au Jus.
0:05:16 > 0:05:19I'm Frederick, I'll be your waiter for the night.
0:05:19 > 0:05:22Now, our specials are duck confit with dauphinoise potatoes
0:05:22 > 0:05:26and French green beans, and our fish of the day is seared halibut
0:05:26 > 0:05:28with caper beurre blanc and crushed Jersey Royals.
0:05:28 > 0:05:31The wine list is at the back. Shall I give you a moment to decide?
0:05:31 > 0:05:33Yes, thank you, that would be nice.
0:05:38 > 0:05:41Staff friendly but not overbearing.
0:05:41 > 0:05:43Decor sumptuous and tasteful.
0:05:43 > 0:05:46Intimate lighting.
0:05:46 > 0:05:48Superb music.
0:05:48 > 0:05:50What have we done?
0:06:09 > 0:06:12- Vish?- Jas? Hi!
0:06:12 > 0:06:13Wow.
0:06:13 > 0:06:15I'm so glad you're here.
0:06:15 > 0:06:18I always expect to be stood up for these things.
0:06:18 > 0:06:19Do this a lot then?
0:06:19 > 0:06:21Oh, no, no, just once or twice.
0:06:21 > 0:06:25Oh, I'm sorry, this is my second Mai Tai.
0:06:25 > 0:06:28I got here a bit too early and, well, I'm nervous.
0:06:28 > 0:06:33- Me too. So you'd better order me one.- Sure!
0:06:46 > 0:06:49Yes, I'd like to order pizza for delivery please.
0:06:50 > 0:06:55Yes... 12" La Reine...
0:06:55 > 0:06:59with...pepperoni, mushrooms, olives.
0:06:59 > 0:07:01And that comes with free chicken wings, does it?
0:07:04 > 0:07:05Excellente!
0:07:15 > 0:07:17Actually I was pretty shy at college,
0:07:17 > 0:07:21not the towering wall of self-confidence that I am today.
0:07:21 > 0:07:22And I don't think it was...
0:07:22 > 0:07:24Yeah, it wasn't till my second year
0:07:24 > 0:07:27when I really started to come out of my shell.
0:07:27 > 0:07:30Mandy used to, like, hammer on my door and drag me out to parties.
0:07:30 > 0:07:32- I can see her doing that. - And what about you?
0:07:32 > 0:07:34I bet you were pretty popular at medical school.
0:07:34 > 0:07:36No, I was too busy hitting the books.
0:07:36 > 0:07:40I mean, I let my hair down occasionally, don't get me wrong,
0:07:40 > 0:07:43but compared to most I was pretty dull.
0:07:43 > 0:07:46Dull? I don't think so.
0:07:47 > 0:07:53So... Are you glad Mandy dragged us both out of our dorm rooms tonight?
0:07:54 > 0:07:57Yeah, I think I am.
0:08:02 > 0:08:04Yes, hello. It's Howard Bellamy here.
0:08:04 > 0:08:09Yes, I ordered a pizza... one hour, three minutes ago.
0:08:09 > 0:08:12Yes, it's not arrived yet.
0:08:12 > 0:08:13Howard Bellamy.
0:08:16 > 0:08:17Bell-a-my. B. B. Bellamy.
0:08:19 > 0:08:21ON-HOLD MUSIC: "That's Amore" by Dean Martin
0:08:26 > 0:08:28Yes. Hello. Oh, he's on his way, is he?
0:08:30 > 0:08:31Yeah, I should think so too.
0:08:31 > 0:08:34DOORBELL RINGS No, I think he's here already.
0:08:41 > 0:08:45- Lorraine?- The name's Bellamy.
0:08:45 > 0:08:47La Reine pizza?
0:08:47 > 0:08:48Oh, yes, yes.
0:08:52 > 0:08:55- Aren't I supposed to get chicken wings with this?- I wouldn't know.
0:08:55 > 0:08:58- Excuse me?- I just deliver. Take it up with the restaurant.
0:08:59 > 0:09:02I've already had to call them once to find out where you'd got to.
0:09:02 > 0:09:04That's £9.99.
0:09:05 > 0:09:07Let's hope it's not cold.
0:09:07 > 0:09:11- Keep the penny.- Enjoy your meal!
0:09:22 > 0:09:26MUSIC FROM SHOWER SCENE IN PSYCHO
0:09:31 > 0:09:32Oi!
0:09:36 > 0:09:38Wait! Oi!
0:09:40 > 0:09:42Pineapples.
0:09:43 > 0:09:47ON-HOLD MUSIC: "That's Amore" by Dean Martin
0:09:47 > 0:09:50Yes, hello? I've had the wrong pizza delivered to me.
0:09:51 > 0:09:56I ordered a La Reine. A La Reine!
0:09:56 > 0:09:58And I've been given some sort of Hawaiian thing,
0:09:58 > 0:10:00it's covered in pineapples.
0:10:00 > 0:10:02No, I hate pineapples.
0:10:03 > 0:10:06Well, I would like the pizza that I actually ordered.
0:10:06 > 0:10:09And what about the free chicken wings?
0:10:09 > 0:10:11How's the halibut?
0:10:11 > 0:10:14Sensational.
0:10:14 > 0:10:16The duck?
0:10:16 > 0:10:18Do you remember the last time I ordered duck?
0:10:18 > 0:10:20- Yes.- It's the exact opposite of that.
0:10:20 > 0:10:21SHE SIGHS
0:10:21 > 0:10:23The starters were nothing short of perfection.
0:10:23 > 0:10:26As is the wine. I fear that our first review
0:10:26 > 0:10:28is going to be desperately dull.
0:10:28 > 0:10:30Don't give up. They could still screw up the dessert.
0:10:30 > 0:10:32One lives in hope.
0:10:38 > 0:10:41CAR HORN BLARES
0:10:50 > 0:10:52Oh, it's all right. I'll come to you!
0:10:52 > 0:10:56Oh, I'm sorry. Maybe we should call you a waah-mbulance.
0:10:56 > 0:10:57A what?
0:10:57 > 0:11:00I don't like pineapple chunks. Waah!
0:11:00 > 0:11:02How dare you speak to me like that?!
0:11:02 > 0:11:05Oh, no, are you going to take it out of my tip?
0:11:07 > 0:11:09Here's your La Reine pizza, your lordship.
0:11:09 > 0:11:13Just checking you haven't gobbled half of it.
0:11:13 > 0:11:15We don't give away stuff for free, you know.
0:11:15 > 0:11:16Yes, well, apparently not,
0:11:16 > 0:11:18cos I'm still waiting for my free chicken wings!
0:11:20 > 0:11:25ON-HOLD MUSIC: "That's Amore" by Dean Martin
0:11:27 > 0:11:29Yes, I'd like to make a complaint please.
0:11:29 > 0:11:32About one of your pizza delivery men.
0:11:32 > 0:11:35- HE SLURS:- They put too much ice in these things, don't you think?
0:11:35 > 0:11:38I mean, you're looking at eight or nine quid for basically a slushie.
0:11:39 > 0:11:41Maybe we should move to a table.
0:11:41 > 0:11:44I think you might need to eat something.
0:11:44 > 0:11:46I think you need to drink something.
0:11:46 > 0:11:48What's with the mineral water?
0:11:48 > 0:11:49I told you, I'm driving.
0:11:49 > 0:11:51So take a taxi!
0:11:53 > 0:11:56You think I'm drunk, don't you?
0:11:56 > 0:11:58A little bit.
0:11:58 > 0:12:01That's why you want to order food.
0:12:01 > 0:12:04That is so sweet, looking after me.
0:12:06 > 0:12:08Just like...
0:12:08 > 0:12:10Sarah used to.
0:12:10 > 0:12:12Mandy said something about a recent break-up.
0:12:15 > 0:12:17Three months ago.
0:12:19 > 0:12:22HE CRIES
0:12:22 > 0:12:24Thanks.
0:12:37 > 0:12:40KNOCK AT THE DOOR
0:12:40 > 0:12:41Unbelievable.
0:12:41 > 0:12:45DOORBELL RINGS
0:12:49 > 0:12:51I've just been fired because of you!
0:12:51 > 0:12:54Oh, maybe I should call you a waah-mbulance.
0:12:54 > 0:12:57Make you feel good, does it? To step on one of the little people?
0:12:57 > 0:12:59To have me begging for scraps at the dole office?
0:12:59 > 0:13:01You deserved to lose your job.
0:13:01 > 0:13:04You're the worst pizza delivery guy...period!
0:13:05 > 0:13:07HE SOBS
0:13:07 > 0:13:10You're right. I'm terrible at this job.
0:13:10 > 0:13:13I'm terrible at everything.
0:13:13 > 0:13:15Stop it.
0:13:15 > 0:13:18Stop it!
0:13:18 > 0:13:20Pull yourself together, man. And clear off!
0:13:22 > 0:13:25I'm sorry. I'm so embarrassed.
0:13:25 > 0:13:27Don't be.
0:13:27 > 0:13:30It's just...I miss her so much.
0:13:32 > 0:13:37It's like... It's like a death. Only she's still alive, you know?
0:13:39 > 0:13:42It's perfectly normal for you to feel this way.
0:13:42 > 0:13:46You obviously loved her a great deal.
0:13:46 > 0:13:49But you will get there.
0:13:49 > 0:13:52You just need to give yourself a bit of time to get over her.
0:13:56 > 0:13:59- You're great. - What do you think you're doing?
0:14:00 > 0:14:02Vish?
0:14:04 > 0:14:08Vish, stop messing about. Vish?
0:14:09 > 0:14:13It's all right, I'm a doctor. He's not dead or anything.
0:14:13 > 0:14:15Can you give us a hand, please?
0:14:22 > 0:14:23PIZZA MAN CRIES OUTSIDE
0:14:27 > 0:14:29Give me strength.
0:14:37 > 0:14:40- You've ruined my life! - Pull yourself together, man!
0:14:41 > 0:14:44Evening.
0:14:44 > 0:14:46Get up.
0:14:46 > 0:14:49- You'd better come inside before somebody calls the police.- Really?
0:14:50 > 0:14:51Yes, come on then!
0:14:54 > 0:14:57- Thank you.- Stop snivelling!
0:15:01 > 0:15:02No, you're fine.
0:15:06 > 0:15:08I tried to kiss you.
0:15:08 > 0:15:09Yeah.
0:15:09 > 0:15:12I'm so sorry.
0:15:12 > 0:15:14- It's OK.- No, it's not.
0:15:14 > 0:15:16I don't know what you must think of me.
0:15:16 > 0:15:18I don't... I don't usually drink that much.
0:15:18 > 0:15:23It's just these last few months have been rough, that's all.
0:15:23 > 0:15:24I understand.
0:15:24 > 0:15:27I so wanted to make a good impression tonight.
0:15:27 > 0:15:31Instead I've just made a complete fool of myself.
0:15:31 > 0:15:33Can you forgive me?
0:15:33 > 0:15:34Of course I can.
0:15:34 > 0:15:38But you're clearly not ready to be dating yet.
0:15:38 > 0:15:39I think we should call it a night.
0:15:39 > 0:15:43No, let me at least buy you dinner.
0:15:45 > 0:15:47Say yes. Give me a chance to redeem myself.
0:15:52 > 0:15:53So you lost your job.
0:15:53 > 0:15:55Not your best day, I grant you,
0:15:55 > 0:15:57but it can't be as bad as that.
0:15:57 > 0:15:59I just turned 30.
0:16:01 > 0:16:02Congratulations.
0:16:02 > 0:16:06I'm 30 and I've never had a girlfriend.
0:16:06 > 0:16:08So, you're free and independent.
0:16:08 > 0:16:11I still live with my parents.
0:16:13 > 0:16:15Well... Well, I'm sure they love you very much.
0:16:15 > 0:16:17In fact, why don't we give them a call,
0:16:17 > 0:16:19get them to come and pick you up?
0:16:19 > 0:16:21They hate me.
0:16:22 > 0:16:25I was rubbish at school.
0:16:25 > 0:16:28Never any good at sport, or anything else for that matter.
0:16:30 > 0:16:32And I was bullied for the way I looked.
0:16:32 > 0:16:36On top of that, I've hated every single job I've ever had...
0:16:36 > 0:16:38and I keep getting fired.
0:16:40 > 0:16:43Well, I'm sure you've got something worthwhile in your life.
0:16:43 > 0:16:44Something you enjoy.
0:16:46 > 0:16:50Come on, be quick, my pizza's getting cold.
0:16:50 > 0:16:52Thanks for staying and having dinner with me.
0:16:52 > 0:16:53No problem.
0:16:55 > 0:16:58It shows you're a really caring person.
0:16:58 > 0:17:02Caring and beautiful. And intelligent.
0:17:02 > 0:17:05Thank you. How's your burger?
0:17:05 > 0:17:08Do compliments make you feel uncomfortable?
0:17:08 > 0:17:10No.
0:17:10 > 0:17:13Good, cos you better get used to them.
0:17:15 > 0:17:18A woman as amazing as you
0:17:18 > 0:17:20deserves to be told just how special you are.
0:17:20 > 0:17:23Well, you've told me now, so...
0:17:23 > 0:17:24If you were mine,
0:17:24 > 0:17:27I'd make you feel special every day.
0:17:27 > 0:17:31Look, Vish, I thought we agreed you're not really ready for this.
0:17:33 > 0:17:37I know. But I really like you.
0:17:37 > 0:17:40And I think you like me,
0:17:40 > 0:17:43otherwise you wouldn't have stayed.
0:17:43 > 0:17:45Well, of course I like you.
0:17:45 > 0:17:48But I just prefer to take things slower.
0:17:48 > 0:17:51We've only just met. It takes time to get to know a person.
0:17:58 > 0:18:01Then tell me everything about Jas.
0:18:01 > 0:18:05From the beginning. Don't leave anything out.
0:18:07 > 0:18:08Are you having that?
0:18:14 > 0:18:18It's funny, here you are, talking about the "what ifs" of parenthood,
0:18:18 > 0:18:22and I'd be lying if I said I hadn't done the same.
0:18:22 > 0:18:25You mean, what if you'd never had Chris?
0:18:27 > 0:18:31Look, I can't imagine life without him, I wouldn't want to.
0:18:31 > 0:18:32But...when I was younger,
0:18:32 > 0:18:36I would have looked at somebody in your position with envy,
0:18:36 > 0:18:39not having to cope with it all.
0:18:41 > 0:18:44You have your regrets about not being a parent, Heston, and...
0:18:46 > 0:18:49I have mine about being a bad one.
0:18:49 > 0:18:52I think anyone who's raised a young man as fine as Chris
0:18:52 > 0:18:55can't be a bad mother.
0:18:56 > 0:19:00Well, we're closer now than we've ever been,
0:19:00 > 0:19:02and I'm grateful for that.
0:19:03 > 0:19:06Maybe I can make up for lost time.
0:19:06 > 0:19:09Creme brulee for madame.
0:19:09 > 0:19:11And tarte aux pommes for monsieur.
0:19:11 > 0:19:12Thank you.
0:19:12 > 0:19:14And your Sauternes.
0:19:14 > 0:19:16Aah, Chateau d'Yquem. Excellent.
0:19:20 > 0:19:22- Where's he going with that?- Hmm?
0:19:22 > 0:19:24That's odd.
0:19:30 > 0:19:32All right?
0:19:36 > 0:19:38Probably the worst pizza I've ever tasted.
0:19:38 > 0:19:39I know.
0:19:39 > 0:19:41The chef would use spray-on cheese
0:19:41 > 0:19:43if he thought he could get away with it.
0:19:43 > 0:19:46You're lucky you didn't get your free chicken wings.
0:20:00 > 0:20:01Fancy an omelette?
0:20:03 > 0:20:05I haven't a clue what I'm going to do with the rest of my life.
0:20:05 > 0:20:07Whenever I try and picture the future,
0:20:07 > 0:20:09all I see is this big fat nothing.
0:20:09 > 0:20:12Look, I know you've reached the ripe old age of 30,
0:20:12 > 0:20:14but you've got years ahead of you to sort it out.
0:20:14 > 0:20:16I'll do that.
0:20:16 > 0:20:19So you've got no sense of direction at the moment,
0:20:19 > 0:20:22but opportunities come along when you least expect them.
0:20:22 > 0:20:25Sooner or later you'll find something that you're good at.
0:20:25 > 0:20:27Me? I doubt it.
0:20:32 > 0:20:34Excuse me, can we have the bill, please?
0:20:35 > 0:20:38So, what about tomorrow night?
0:20:38 > 0:20:40You can come to my place, I am a great cook.
0:20:40 > 0:20:44Erm... This weekend's not good.
0:20:44 > 0:20:46Then let's make the most of tonight.
0:20:46 > 0:20:48How about we go dancing?
0:20:48 > 0:20:50No.
0:20:50 > 0:20:55No, no, you're right. Let's go back to your place.
0:20:55 > 0:20:56Vish, that's not going to happen.
0:20:58 > 0:21:01Well...at least can I drive you home?
0:21:01 > 0:21:04You shouldn't be driving. And anyway, I told you, I've got a car.
0:21:05 > 0:21:10- Then maybe you should drive me home. - SHE LAUGHS
0:21:10 > 0:21:11I'm sure you can get a taxi.
0:21:14 > 0:21:17Anyway, Vish...
0:21:17 > 0:21:19thanks...
0:21:19 > 0:21:21for this evening.
0:21:21 > 0:21:23Wait...
0:21:25 > 0:21:26Let me walk you to your car.
0:21:31 > 0:21:33Bill?
0:21:35 > 0:21:37SHE LAUGHS
0:21:37 > 0:21:38SHE SIGHS
0:21:42 > 0:21:43Enjoy your Sauternes.
0:21:47 > 0:21:49Why on earth has he put it in a carafe?
0:21:49 > 0:21:51Oh, everybody's doing it these days. It's tres trendy.
0:21:51 > 0:21:53Well, it's completely unnecessary.
0:21:53 > 0:21:55When I order a wine, I like to see it on the table,
0:21:55 > 0:21:59not have it decanted in some dark back room.
0:21:59 > 0:22:00I'm sure it'll taste just as good.
0:22:00 > 0:22:03- Well, it better, at this price. - Oh, hush.
0:22:03 > 0:22:06- Here's to a perfectly infuriating evening.- No!
0:22:11 > 0:22:13- They couldn't have... - What's the matter?
0:22:13 > 0:22:16- Unmistakeable.- What is?
0:22:16 > 0:22:18The wine I ordered was Chateau d'Yquem.
0:22:18 > 0:22:21He has switched it for an inferior wine.
0:22:21 > 0:22:23No. Are you sure?
0:22:23 > 0:22:25It's perfectly palatable,
0:22:25 > 0:22:27it comes from Monbazillac, a neighbouring region,
0:22:27 > 0:22:28but this is a cheaper wine.
0:22:28 > 0:22:30You know what this means, Emma?
0:22:30 > 0:22:33We've been cheated.
0:22:33 > 0:22:36- SHE GASPS - Mon Dieu!
0:22:43 > 0:22:46What every young man needs is structure and discipline.
0:22:46 > 0:22:49Have you ever considered a career in the army?
0:22:49 > 0:22:51I'd end up in military prison.
0:22:51 > 0:22:54Yes, that's probably true.
0:22:54 > 0:22:56Right, bon appetit.
0:22:56 > 0:22:58What about yourself?
0:22:58 > 0:23:01- I'm not hungry. Pepper?- Yeah. Sure.
0:23:11 > 0:23:13How'd you get it so light?
0:23:14 > 0:23:18That's remarkable. I never thought eggs could taste like this.
0:23:18 > 0:23:20Are you winding me up?
0:23:20 > 0:23:22I mean, anyone can make an omelette.
0:23:22 > 0:23:27Well, actually, that's not true. It's very difficult to make a good one.
0:23:27 > 0:23:31In fact, they say this is the best way you can test a chef's skills.
0:23:32 > 0:23:35Do you see what I'm getting at here, Dave?
0:23:35 > 0:23:37You have a viable talent underneath your own nose
0:23:37 > 0:23:38and you don't even know it.
0:23:38 > 0:23:40- Talent?!- A chef.
0:23:40 > 0:23:42You could be a world-class chef,
0:23:42 > 0:23:44if you got off your backside and applied yourself.
0:23:44 > 0:23:47- What? Do you really think so? - Yes, I do.
0:23:56 > 0:23:59OK, good night then.
0:23:59 > 0:24:01Good night.
0:24:01 > 0:24:03Make sure you get home sa...
0:24:03 > 0:24:05What are you doing?!
0:24:06 > 0:24:08I thought it'd be romantic.
0:24:08 > 0:24:10Well, it wasn't, so cut it out!
0:24:10 > 0:24:14Sorry. I don't know what came over me.
0:24:16 > 0:24:18Look, you're obviously not a bad guy,
0:24:18 > 0:24:21you've just got...issues you need to work through.
0:24:21 > 0:24:24But, in the meantime...
0:24:24 > 0:24:28don't kiss anyone unless they kiss you first.
0:24:28 > 0:24:30Goodbye, Vish.
0:24:30 > 0:24:34It doesn't have to be goodbye, does it?
0:24:34 > 0:24:38Look... I'm not normally like this!
0:24:38 > 0:24:39It must be the antidepressants.
0:24:39 > 0:24:41Get off my car!
0:24:41 > 0:24:43We could be so good together.
0:24:43 > 0:24:45Last chance, Vish.
0:24:45 > 0:24:47Don't go. Please.
0:24:56 > 0:24:58I'm sorry I ruined your evening.
0:24:58 > 0:25:00Well, I'm sorry I got you the sack.
0:25:00 > 0:25:04- I probably deserved it. - Yes, you definitely deserved that.
0:25:06 > 0:25:07I tell you what,
0:25:07 > 0:25:10I've got a friend of mine in the restaurant business.
0:25:10 > 0:25:13Why don't you give him a call, see if he's got any vacancies.
0:25:13 > 0:25:15Thanks.
0:25:15 > 0:25:17Mention my name, Captain Bellamy.
0:25:17 > 0:25:19His name's Mr Gray, with an A,
0:25:19 > 0:25:23and the place is called Grayze, with a Z-E.
0:25:23 > 0:25:27Oh, cos... Cos people graze!
0:25:27 > 0:25:29Good one. I'll let myself out.
0:25:32 > 0:25:33Wrong door!
0:25:33 > 0:25:35- Good luck!- Ta-ra!
0:25:43 > 0:25:44HE SIGHS
0:25:47 > 0:25:51GAME OF THRONES THEME PLAYS
0:26:02 > 0:26:04ELECTRIC CRACKLE
0:26:11 > 0:26:15HE LAUGHS
0:26:15 > 0:26:17- This is outrageous! - Sir, there must be some mistake.
0:26:17 > 0:26:20We... We would never try to cheat a customer.
0:26:20 > 0:26:22- Are you calling him a liar? - Not at all, madame.
0:26:22 > 0:26:26If there was a mix up with the wines we can only apologise.
0:26:26 > 0:26:29So you admit it? You switched the wines.
0:26:29 > 0:26:33We may have opened the wrong bottle. You won't be charged for it.
0:26:33 > 0:26:36And you can have a complimentary drink, anything you want,
0:26:36 > 0:26:37Cognac perhaps?
0:26:37 > 0:26:41A bribe won't help you now. The bill, please. We're leaving.
0:26:41 > 0:26:43Again, we are very sorry.
0:26:43 > 0:26:45Oh, you will be, you can be sure of that.
0:26:45 > 0:26:48- I don't understand. - You will soon enough.
0:26:50 > 0:26:52Sharpen your wit and your pencil, my dear.
0:26:52 > 0:26:55We're going to have some fun.
0:26:55 > 0:26:58- "A cavalcade of incompetence!" - THEY LAUGH
0:27:03 > 0:27:06Who would pay £75 to be covered in mud?
0:27:06 > 0:27:09I could do that for you in my back garden for nothing.
0:27:09 > 0:27:12How are your bruises? Still sore?
0:27:12 > 0:27:14They're fine.
0:27:14 > 0:27:16My son. He's gay.
0:27:16 > 0:27:19I've tried everything to get him to open up.
0:27:19 > 0:27:21Coming out can be very difficult. Especially to your mother.
0:27:21 > 0:27:23It was hard for you, was it?
0:27:25 > 0:27:28Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd