0:00:27 > 0:00:29BANGING ON CAR WINDOW
0:00:36 > 0:00:38Morning.
0:00:38 > 0:00:40Suppose coffee's out the question?
0:00:40 > 0:00:42Come on. I think you'd better come with me.
0:00:48 > 0:00:51One set of car keys. I have to ask you, are these yours?
0:00:51 > 0:00:53Yeah, like I could afford a car like that!
0:00:53 > 0:00:55No, they're not hers.
0:00:55 > 0:00:57And apparently you refused to give a breath sample,
0:00:57 > 0:00:58is that right?
0:00:58 > 0:01:01Actually, I didn't refuse, I'm asthmatic and this one here
0:01:01 > 0:01:03wouldn't believe me, cos I've lost my inhaler.
0:01:03 > 0:01:05Asthmatic? Are you? That's a new one on me, Lizzy.
0:01:05 > 0:01:07Right, what we got in here?
0:01:07 > 0:01:09A purse, with bank cards...
0:01:09 > 0:01:12Oi, watch out, there's money in there. I know what you lot are like.
0:01:12 > 0:01:14Yep. 58 pence, to be exact.
0:01:14 > 0:01:16Don't you worry, this is all going down on your form.
0:01:16 > 0:01:20What else we got? Sunglasses still with the security tag on them.
0:01:20 > 0:01:23One piece of women's clothing still on the coat hanger.
0:01:23 > 0:01:26Have you got receipts for any of these?
0:01:26 > 0:01:27Nope. Didn't pay for none of it.
0:01:27 > 0:01:28Shock horror(!)
0:01:28 > 0:01:31There's a couple of DVDs in there n'all.
0:01:31 > 0:01:34I can write you a list if you like, where I got them all from.
0:01:38 > 0:01:41It's Liz MacWhinnie, she's three sheets to the wind as usual.
0:01:41 > 0:01:43She refused to give a breath test.
0:01:43 > 0:01:47She's saying she's asthmatic but there's no sign of an inhaler.
0:01:47 > 0:01:48If you could do the honours, please?
0:01:48 > 0:01:51Yeah, no problem. You think she's playing for time?
0:01:51 > 0:01:52Well, who knows?
0:01:52 > 0:01:54She's already stuck her hand up to nicking a car
0:01:54 > 0:01:56and volunteered a few other thefts as well,
0:01:56 > 0:01:58so why she wouldn't just take a "drunk in charge", I don't know.
0:01:58 > 0:02:02Sounds pretty prolific.
0:02:02 > 0:02:03- Don't you know Liz?- No.
0:02:03 > 0:02:06I'm surprised you've managed to avoid her.
0:02:06 > 0:02:08She's been in and out of here for years,
0:02:08 > 0:02:10had a problem with drinking for as long as I can remember.
0:02:10 > 0:02:13Only time we don't see her is when she's inside.
0:02:13 > 0:02:15She an aggressive drunk, or is she harmless?
0:02:15 > 0:02:19She's gobby but harmless.
0:02:19 > 0:02:21We just go through the motions, don't we, mate?
0:02:21 > 0:02:23And then leave it to the magistrates.
0:02:23 > 0:02:25But it's all cut and dry anyway.
0:02:25 > 0:02:26Any trouble, you know where I am.
0:02:26 > 0:02:27OK.
0:02:30 > 0:02:33Hi, I'm Dr Clay, I'll be taking your bloods.
0:02:33 > 0:02:35Yeah, I know, the other idiot explained.
0:02:35 > 0:02:37OK. Could you take off your cardigan
0:02:37 > 0:02:39and roll up your sleeve for me, please?
0:02:46 > 0:02:48Sounds like you've had a busy day already.
0:02:48 > 0:02:51Just cos I'm unemployed don't mean I can't be productive.
0:02:51 > 0:02:53See, that's the problem with our society. Everyone assumes
0:02:53 > 0:02:57we're all lazy scroungers.
0:02:57 > 0:03:00You were just arrested for taking a car and whatever else.
0:03:01 > 0:03:04You're hardly providing an alternative viewpoint.
0:03:04 > 0:03:06Well, exactly.
0:03:06 > 0:03:07For a homeless, unemployed alcoholic,
0:03:07 > 0:03:09there are no alternatives.
0:03:09 > 0:03:11Sharp prick.
0:03:15 > 0:03:17Sounds pretty extreme.
0:03:17 > 0:03:20It is extreme, it's a political statement.
0:03:20 > 0:03:22How is stealing a car a political statement?
0:03:22 > 0:03:24I wasn't stealing it. Just borrowed it for a bit.
0:03:24 > 0:03:27It's a bit cold, early mornings.
0:03:27 > 0:03:30Right, just give me a second.
0:03:31 > 0:03:34Just pop your finger on that for me, hold your arm.
0:03:35 > 0:03:37So you were just staying warm?
0:03:37 > 0:03:38And having a kip.
0:03:38 > 0:03:40It's hard trying to get your eight hours
0:03:40 > 0:03:42when you're on the lookout for weirdos.
0:03:42 > 0:03:45Wouldn't have thought weirdos would bother you that much.
0:03:46 > 0:03:49You couldn't get me a puffer, could you?
0:03:49 > 0:03:50For me asthma.
0:03:52 > 0:03:54Oh, what, they telling you I'm pulling a fast one?
0:03:55 > 0:03:57Where's your inhaler?
0:03:57 > 0:03:58I lost it.
0:03:58 > 0:04:00I feel OK but I don't like not having it with me.
0:04:00 > 0:04:02OK, I'll see what I can do.
0:04:04 > 0:04:06Listen, if you weren't taking the car,
0:04:06 > 0:04:07why don't you just tell the police that,
0:04:07 > 0:04:09you might get away with a rap on the knuckles?
0:04:09 > 0:04:12A rap on the knuckles ain't going to get me banged up again, is it?
0:04:12 > 0:04:15The government doesn't give a monkey's about people like me.
0:04:15 > 0:04:18Only chance of a hot meal and a roof over my head is prison,
0:04:18 > 0:04:21which, ironically, costs the tax-payer more than putting us
0:04:21 > 0:04:22in a proper home.
0:04:22 > 0:04:24So you'd rather be in prison, than homeless?
0:04:24 > 0:04:28Prison's not that bad. Barfield's the best.
0:04:28 > 0:04:31Stretton Hill's OK, especially the mother and baby unit,
0:04:31 > 0:04:34but Barfield's got this massive library.
0:04:34 > 0:04:37Taught myself fluent French there.
0:04:37 > 0:04:41Est-ce que vous pouvez m'aider avec mes bagages, monsieur?
0:04:41 > 0:04:43Do I even want to know what that means?
0:04:43 > 0:04:45Oh, you're going to have to look it up.
0:04:47 > 0:04:49Sorry, Nell. Can't start the day without a cuppa.
0:04:49 > 0:04:53Fine with me, any excuse to put my feet up.
0:04:53 > 0:04:55Now, what can I do for you?
0:04:55 > 0:04:57I've got really painful hips
0:04:57 > 0:04:59and I know it's common during pregnancy
0:04:59 > 0:05:01but I just wanted to put my mind at rest.
0:05:01 > 0:05:03Can you roll your sleeve up for me?
0:05:06 > 0:05:08It's probably just the joints
0:05:08 > 0:05:10loosening, getting you ready for labour.
0:05:18 > 0:05:20Are you sleeping with a pillow between your knees?
0:05:20 > 0:05:23And under the bump, and a hot water bottle.
0:05:23 > 0:05:25But it's not just at night,
0:05:25 > 0:05:28and now my knees are starting to ache as well.
0:05:28 > 0:05:30Just worried it might be a sign.
0:05:30 > 0:05:32Yeah, it's a sign you're pregnant.
0:05:32 > 0:05:34Your hormones cause your tendons to loosen,
0:05:34 > 0:05:37so aching joints is par for the course, I'm afraid.
0:05:37 > 0:05:39Majority of women reckon they feel better
0:05:39 > 0:05:43when they're pregnant. Sod's law I'm in the minority.
0:05:43 > 0:05:45I haven't had a flare-up for over a year, but...
0:05:45 > 0:05:46Sorry, flare-up of what?
0:05:46 > 0:05:48Rheumatoid arthritis.
0:05:48 > 0:05:50Sorry, I assumed you'd read my notes.
0:05:50 > 0:05:51Right.
0:05:51 > 0:05:53No wonder you're joining the dots.
0:05:53 > 0:05:55So you do think it's a flare-up?
0:05:55 > 0:05:56Oh, that's just what I need. The cot
0:05:56 > 0:05:58hasn't arrived yet, I haven't even painted
0:05:58 > 0:06:01the nursery, and I don't want to go back on drugs while I'm pregnant.
0:06:01 > 0:06:04Whoa, let's not jump the gun,
0:06:04 > 0:06:05your blood pressure's fine.
0:06:05 > 0:06:09These are all fairly normal symptoms of being pregnant.
0:06:09 > 0:06:12Fairly normal? Not completely normal?
0:06:12 > 0:06:15Yes, actually, completely normal.
0:06:15 > 0:06:17Oh, thank God for that!
0:06:17 > 0:06:20Sorry, you must think I'm a raving idiot.
0:06:20 > 0:06:22- I'm sorry! - Don't apologise.
0:06:22 > 0:06:25It's normal to have concerns about your pregnancy, especially
0:06:25 > 0:06:26if there are other factors.
0:06:26 > 0:06:28I just want to do everything
0:06:28 > 0:06:30I can to assuage those concerns, so...
0:06:30 > 0:06:32And you have, thank you.
0:06:32 > 0:06:33To be honest, I feel a bit silly,
0:06:33 > 0:06:36letting my paranoia get the better of me.
0:06:36 > 0:06:38Nonsense, you don't have to rush off.
0:06:38 > 0:06:41No, you've... I've taken enough of your time.
0:06:41 > 0:06:42Thank you, Doctor.
0:06:46 > 0:06:50Any news on the Liz MacWhinnie blood sample?
0:06:50 > 0:06:51Ah, yep. She's over. 105 mgs.
0:06:51 > 0:06:55She probably had a top-up for breakfast, knowing Liz.
0:06:55 > 0:06:57She told me she had no intention of driving the car.
0:06:57 > 0:07:01Doesn't matter. Keys were in the ignition, engine was running.
0:07:01 > 0:07:03Yeah, but the engine was running because the heater was on.
0:07:03 > 0:07:05You know she wants to go back to prison?
0:07:05 > 0:07:08She reckons it's a form of protest, taking up a cell to prove
0:07:08 > 0:07:10a point about lack of support for the homeless.
0:07:10 > 0:07:13Of course she wants to go back to prison. She's institutionalised.
0:07:13 > 0:07:14Can see her point.
0:07:14 > 0:07:17Probably would be cheaper to help her off the streets
0:07:17 > 0:07:19and into a home, than it would locking her away again.
0:07:19 > 0:07:23Just because she needs help it doesn't mean she can go round
0:07:23 > 0:07:25breaking the law.
0:07:25 > 0:07:28You know, deep down, she likes being in the system.
0:07:28 > 0:07:30She doesn't want any help.
0:07:30 > 0:07:32Thank you.
0:07:35 > 0:07:39All right, I've checked your medical records and I've got you an inhaler
0:07:39 > 0:07:42but I'd like to examine you first, if that's OK?
0:07:42 > 0:07:44Could you lift your top up for me?
0:07:51 > 0:07:53I'm just going to listen to your back first.
0:08:00 > 0:08:02Breathe in.
0:08:06 > 0:08:07Again.
0:08:09 > 0:08:11When was the last time you had an asthma attack?
0:08:11 > 0:08:14Don't know. Months? A year?
0:08:16 > 0:08:19Yet it was bad enough to stop you being breathalysed?
0:08:19 > 0:08:21Yeah, but imagine if I'd done the test, had an attack
0:08:21 > 0:08:23and I didn't have my inhaler with me.
0:08:23 > 0:08:25Police'd be accused of all sorts.
0:08:25 > 0:08:27I was doing them a favour.
0:08:28 > 0:08:30Can I listen to your chest, please?
0:08:38 > 0:08:40Sounds fine.
0:08:40 > 0:08:44Is there anything else you need to tell me?
0:08:44 > 0:08:46No, no, that was years ago.
0:08:46 > 0:08:50We all have different ways of coping, but I'm over all that now.
0:08:59 > 0:09:01Thought you were getting here early?
0:09:01 > 0:09:04I've made a start on the cakes but there's not a lot I can do until...
0:09:04 > 0:09:06Oh, sorry.
0:09:06 > 0:09:08I was expecting Trevor.
0:09:08 > 0:09:11Trevor couldn't make it. I offered to swap.
0:09:11 > 0:09:13You don't mind, do you?
0:09:13 > 0:09:14No, why would I mind?
0:09:14 > 0:09:17Yeah, he had to take his daughter to the dentist, his brother was
0:09:17 > 0:09:20going to do it but he had this thing at work he couldn't miss,
0:09:20 > 0:09:21so...
0:09:21 > 0:09:24So, I can be your sous-chef if you like? What do you need?
0:09:24 > 0:09:26Well, maybe if you start on the sandwiches?
0:09:26 > 0:09:28All the stuff's over there.
0:09:28 > 0:09:29Right.
0:09:33 > 0:09:38I'm not sure if it's something the church would help with directly,
0:09:38 > 0:09:41or if there are any other charities who might...
0:09:45 > 0:09:46That sounds perfect!
0:09:49 > 0:09:52Yeah, thank you, thank you, Mrs Tembe, I owe you one.
0:09:52 > 0:09:55Mrs Tembe? What's all that about?
0:09:55 > 0:09:57Getting one out of the system.
0:09:59 > 0:10:02And, with a permanent address, you stand a better chance of being
0:10:02 > 0:10:05bailed instead of put back inside.
0:10:05 > 0:10:08Did I ask for your help?
0:10:08 > 0:10:10No, but it is perfect, and it's got an onsite warden,
0:10:10 > 0:10:14large communal space for meetings and stuff
0:10:14 > 0:10:17which are a condition for residents who have a history of substance
0:10:17 > 0:10:19abuse. But then once you're settled,
0:10:19 > 0:10:21you could have the kids over to visit.
0:10:21 > 0:10:24Who mentioned anything about kids?
0:10:25 > 0:10:29You mentioned a mother and baby unit so I just presumed.
0:10:29 > 0:10:31I did have a kid.
0:10:31 > 0:10:34But they don't like you keeping 'em in prison.
0:10:34 > 0:10:35So what happened?
0:10:35 > 0:10:38You get a choice. Either a family member looks after it
0:10:38 > 0:10:41or you get it adopted. I ain't got a family, so...
0:10:41 > 0:10:43You still in contact?
0:10:43 > 0:10:46Why would I be? Didn't want her in the first place.
0:10:48 > 0:10:50Sorry, I thought you'd be pleased.
0:10:50 > 0:10:52I am. Sounds perfect.
0:10:57 > 0:10:59Listen to this bit -
0:10:59 > 0:11:02"Corticosteroids exert anti-inflammatory
0:11:02 > 0:11:05"and immunosuppressant actions, while oestrogen can decrease
0:11:05 > 0:11:08"the stromal cell production of interleukein-1 and TNF-alpha..."
0:11:08 > 0:11:09SHE GROANS
0:11:09 > 0:11:12Why is it, when we become doctors, we stop speaking English?
0:11:12 > 0:11:13I mean, I know the words but...
0:11:13 > 0:11:15Come on!
0:11:15 > 0:11:17I suppose it is a little bit dense.
0:11:17 > 0:11:19Dense? It's impenetrable is what it is!
0:11:19 > 0:11:21Would you look at what you've written!
0:11:21 > 0:11:24What, don't tell me it gets worse?
0:11:24 > 0:11:27It doesn't matter, just more blather.
0:11:27 > 0:11:29It's enough to make a girl feel stupid.
0:11:29 > 0:11:31That's what our resident geek's for.
0:11:31 > 0:11:33He does all the hard work so you don't have to.
0:11:33 > 0:11:36It's my patient, I couldn't ask another doctor...
0:11:36 > 0:11:40Al Haskey's offered to help, with no incentive or personal gain.
0:11:40 > 0:11:42That's a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
0:11:42 > 0:11:44I would take him up on that if I were you.
0:11:44 > 0:11:46Actually, I was going to go to the Icon for lunch.
0:11:46 > 0:11:49What, with your sandwiches?
0:11:49 > 0:11:51Or I could stay here.
0:11:53 > 0:11:55Great.
0:12:00 > 0:12:03Your hearing's set for ten o'clock tomorrow morning. You don't
0:12:03 > 0:12:05need me to tell you that failure to appear will
0:12:05 > 0:12:09result in a warrant being issued for your arrest, OK?
0:12:09 > 0:12:10Yeah. Doc?
0:12:10 > 0:12:15I just want to say cheers. You know, for taking the time.
0:12:15 > 0:12:17I appreciate it.
0:12:17 > 0:12:19Good luck, yeah?
0:12:23 > 0:12:25Can you pass the ham?
0:12:27 > 0:12:29Thank you.
0:12:29 > 0:12:31And tomatoes, thanks?
0:12:34 > 0:12:36You know what this needs?
0:12:36 > 0:12:39My kids are mad for anything with mustard in it.
0:12:39 > 0:12:41Oh, me too when I was a kid.
0:12:41 > 0:12:43My husband used to reckon it was too spicy for them
0:12:43 > 0:12:45but they can't get enough of it.
0:12:45 > 0:12:46Does he do the cooking at home?
0:12:46 > 0:12:48You're kidding, aren't you?
0:12:48 > 0:12:51Even when he was still around, he was never the hands-on dad type.
0:12:51 > 0:12:53MICROWAVE PINGS
0:12:53 > 0:12:55I was only 17 when we got together.
0:12:55 > 0:12:57A very young 17.
0:12:57 > 0:13:00I idolised him, thought he knew it all.
0:13:00 > 0:13:02So did he.
0:13:02 > 0:13:04We all make mistakes.
0:13:04 > 0:13:08Yeah, but not all of us have to live with the consequences.
0:13:08 > 0:13:12When my parents died, he used my inheritance to set up
0:13:12 > 0:13:14a business, property development.
0:13:14 > 0:13:17Easy way to make money, he said.
0:13:17 > 0:13:20Easy way to lose money as well.
0:13:20 > 0:13:22Careful, it's hot.
0:13:22 > 0:13:23So had you no idea?
0:13:23 > 0:13:26Well, every time I mentioned it, he was like,
0:13:26 > 0:13:29"No need for you to worry about it, you don't understand finance."
0:13:29 > 0:13:32It's my own fault, I should've been more persistent
0:13:32 > 0:13:35but he had this way of making me feel stupid.
0:13:35 > 0:13:37I was stupid.
0:13:37 > 0:13:39Don't be so hard on yourself.
0:13:39 > 0:13:40No, it's true.
0:13:40 > 0:13:41He only got away with it cos I let him.
0:13:41 > 0:13:44And then he ran off, the house got repossessed,
0:13:44 > 0:13:46and I had these massive bills I couldn't pay.
0:13:46 > 0:13:47So how did you manage?
0:13:47 > 0:13:50Well, I had to, for the kids' sake.
0:13:50 > 0:13:51All that time he made me
0:13:51 > 0:13:53feel like I was completely useless.
0:13:53 > 0:13:55It turns out he was wrong.
0:13:56 > 0:13:58I'm not brilliant, but I can manage.
0:14:01 > 0:14:03It's lovely. So what about you?
0:14:03 > 0:14:05What about me?
0:14:05 > 0:14:09Well, I've told you my sob story, what about yours?
0:14:09 > 0:14:12What's your skeleton in the cupboard?
0:14:12 > 0:14:16Nothing to tell. I've no wife or kids,
0:14:16 > 0:14:19no job and no prospects!
0:14:19 > 0:14:21I wouldn't say that.
0:14:33 > 0:14:35Oi, you, come here!
0:14:35 > 0:14:37What do you think you're doing? I'm warning you.
0:14:37 > 0:14:38DULL THUD
0:14:38 > 0:14:41KNOCK AT DOOR Come in.
0:14:41 > 0:14:43Got another one for you. Had a barney with a store detective.
0:14:43 > 0:14:46Good right hook, bruised knuckles.
0:14:46 > 0:14:48Show him in.
0:14:48 > 0:14:50Her. Come on.
0:14:55 > 0:14:57Thank you.
0:15:06 > 0:15:07Show me your hand.
0:15:15 > 0:15:16Can you move your fingers?
0:15:20 > 0:15:22Doesn't look like it's broken.
0:15:25 > 0:15:28I'll clean and dress it for you, but it'll need some rest for a while.
0:15:30 > 0:15:32All that about using crime as a protest,
0:15:32 > 0:15:34just to get a roof over your head...
0:15:34 > 0:15:37Now you've got somewhere to live, you're still breaking the law.
0:15:37 > 0:15:39I never asked for your help.
0:15:44 > 0:15:47So what are we talking about, worst case scenario?
0:15:47 > 0:15:50Well, it's nine months without medication, isn't it?
0:15:50 > 0:15:52You've got the additional stress on
0:15:52 > 0:15:54the joints with the added baby weight.
0:15:54 > 0:15:56She could be looking at long-term joint damage.
0:15:56 > 0:15:59But we find her the right medication, she'll be fine.
0:15:59 > 0:16:01Thanks, Al.
0:16:01 > 0:16:03I've never had a pregnant patient with RA before.
0:16:03 > 0:16:05Been through it on paper but it's different in practice.
0:16:05 > 0:16:07Just paranoid I missed something.
0:16:07 > 0:16:10Ah, paranoia. It's what keeps us on our toes.
0:16:10 > 0:16:11And tea.
0:16:11 > 0:16:12And fags.
0:16:12 > 0:16:14And bacon sandwiches.
0:16:15 > 0:16:17So have you got any plans for the rest of the week?
0:16:17 > 0:16:18Not really.
0:16:18 > 0:16:20Me neither.
0:16:20 > 0:16:23My sister's staying as well, so I've got a baby-sitter on tap.
0:16:26 > 0:16:27Do you know what?
0:16:27 > 0:16:30I realised the other day that I haven't been out to
0:16:30 > 0:16:32the cinema in years.
0:16:32 > 0:16:35Apart from with the kids, but an hour of, "Who's he?"
0:16:35 > 0:16:37and, "Why's she doing that?"
0:16:37 > 0:16:40It doesn't really count as going out.
0:16:40 > 0:16:42Yeah, I'm not really a big fan of the cinema.
0:16:42 > 0:16:45I prefer to watch films at home. You don't have to put up with
0:16:45 > 0:16:48people texting and rustling sweet wrappers.
0:16:48 > 0:16:52And what is it with people speaking with their mouths full?
0:16:55 > 0:16:57Maybe we could do something?
0:16:57 > 0:16:59I mean, not the cinema, obviously, but...
0:16:59 > 0:17:01A meal?
0:17:02 > 0:17:05Well, maybe not a meal, that's a bit...
0:17:05 > 0:17:07We could go for a drink, if you like?
0:17:09 > 0:17:10I just think it might be nice,
0:17:10 > 0:17:12to get to know each other better.
0:17:14 > 0:17:16I don't know.
0:17:18 > 0:17:21Where does all this washing-up come from?
0:17:21 > 0:17:24Why don't I crack on with this, while you go and serve out front?
0:17:31 > 0:17:33Don't take it personally.
0:17:35 > 0:17:38I had it all sorted, she didn't even give it a day.
0:17:39 > 0:17:41She doesn't want help.
0:17:42 > 0:17:45You do know, according to her prison records, that
0:17:45 > 0:17:47she was offered counselling several times and turned it down?
0:17:47 > 0:17:49Why was she offered counselling?
0:17:49 > 0:17:52Problems with confined spaces, ongoing disputes with other
0:17:52 > 0:17:58inmates resulting in broken bones, a stab wound, regular beatings...
0:17:58 > 0:18:02You'd think that you would want counselling after all that.
0:18:06 > 0:18:10To be honest, my understanding of rheumatoid arthritis
0:18:10 > 0:18:13isn't as in-depth as my colleagues,
0:18:13 > 0:18:16I wanted to make sure I wasn't overlooking anything
0:18:16 > 0:18:19and I'm really sorry I've had to bring you in twice.
0:18:19 > 0:18:22OK. GPs can't be specialists at everything, I suppose!
0:18:22 > 0:18:25I've got a leaflet for you, actually.
0:18:25 > 0:18:29It's funny, of all the things I miss about my ex, the biggest one
0:18:29 > 0:18:32is not having someone there to tell me when I'm being neurotic.
0:18:32 > 0:18:33You should count yourself lucky!
0:18:33 > 0:18:36My friends take it in turns to tell me when I'm being an idiot.
0:18:36 > 0:18:39Who needs boyfriends when you've got good mates, eh?
0:18:39 > 0:18:41- That's right.- Thanks.
0:18:41 > 0:18:42Take care.
0:18:47 > 0:18:49Why're you so keen to go back inside?
0:18:49 > 0:18:50Maybe I like it.
0:18:50 > 0:18:54You like being beaten up, stabbed?
0:18:54 > 0:18:57You liked it when they broke your leg?
0:18:57 > 0:19:01Not exactly the cushy picture you painted for me, is it?
0:19:01 > 0:19:03So who in their right minds would want to go back to that?
0:19:03 > 0:19:06There's your answer. I'm obviously not in my right mind.
0:19:06 > 0:19:10There we go then(!) That's why we have the self-punishing?
0:19:10 > 0:19:12What do you care?
0:19:12 > 0:19:15When you finish here, you go back to your cosy little home,
0:19:15 > 0:19:17with your cosy little wife and kids,
0:19:17 > 0:19:20and you'll switch off and forget all about me.
0:19:20 > 0:19:21No, I won't.
0:19:21 > 0:19:22Yeah, well you should,
0:19:22 > 0:19:24because I don't need your help and I didn't ask for it.
0:19:24 > 0:19:28Save it for someone who deserves it.
0:19:28 > 0:19:30Look, we've all done things we're ashamed of.
0:19:30 > 0:19:32Acknowledging it,
0:19:32 > 0:19:34facing up to it, sometimes that can be the hardest part.
0:19:34 > 0:19:36Acknowledging what I've done, facing up to it...
0:19:36 > 0:19:38That's not going to change anything.
0:19:38 > 0:19:41I'll still've done it, I'm still worthless.
0:19:41 > 0:19:42No-one's worthless.
0:19:42 > 0:19:44You don't know what you're talking about!
0:19:44 > 0:19:47You know, if I died, no-one would care, no-one would mourn me,
0:19:47 > 0:19:51no-one's lives'd change and that's exactly how it should be,
0:19:51 > 0:19:53cos I don't deserve it.
0:19:53 > 0:19:56Whatever you've done, nothing can be that terrible.
0:19:56 > 0:19:58She'll be scarred for life because of me.
0:19:59 > 0:20:03She'll grow up thinking no-one's loved her.
0:20:03 > 0:20:09You know, I created her, I gave birth to her, then I rejected her.
0:20:09 > 0:20:11What's worse than that?
0:20:11 > 0:20:12You gave her a chance.
0:20:12 > 0:20:13I gave her up!
0:20:13 > 0:20:14What was the alternative?
0:20:14 > 0:20:17Foster care when you were inside, living on the streets
0:20:17 > 0:20:19when you weren't? What sort of life would that've been?
0:20:19 > 0:20:22Any other mum would've kept her, regardless.
0:20:22 > 0:20:24They'd have loved her. Properly.
0:20:24 > 0:20:27Just because you give up a child for adoption it doesn't
0:20:27 > 0:20:28mean you don't love them.
0:20:28 > 0:20:30Doesn't it?
0:20:30 > 0:20:34I didn't even name her, I couldn't even look her in the face, I...
0:20:35 > 0:20:38They tried to make me but I closed my eyes.
0:20:38 > 0:20:41I didn't even want to picture what she looked like.
0:20:42 > 0:20:48I can't imagine her growing up, getting older.
0:20:48 > 0:20:51I don't wonder what the sound of her laughter is.
0:20:51 > 0:20:54I just don't want to know any of that.
0:20:56 > 0:20:59They send me photos, every year for her birthday.
0:20:59 > 0:21:02Her social worker gives it to me.
0:21:02 > 0:21:05I just rip it up or burn it,
0:21:05 > 0:21:07I can't even look at it.
0:21:07 > 0:21:10What you did was completely understandable.
0:21:10 > 0:21:13We all have different ways of coping.
0:21:13 > 0:21:15But this isn't coping, Liz.
0:21:15 > 0:21:18This cycle of alcohol abuse, breaking the law,
0:21:18 > 0:21:20the self-punishment.
0:21:20 > 0:21:21None of that's coping.
0:21:21 > 0:21:25Do you really want to spend the rest of your life like this?
0:21:34 > 0:21:37- Claire.- I'm just going to start clearing up in the kitchen.
0:21:37 > 0:21:38Can that wait? Please?
0:21:45 > 0:21:48I like you so I'm going to level with you.
0:21:49 > 0:21:52I'm not very good at relationships.
0:21:52 > 0:21:53Neither am I...
0:21:53 > 0:21:55No, no, no, no, I mean, really.
0:21:57 > 0:21:58I've done...
0:22:01 > 0:22:04I've done things in my past which I'm not proud of.
0:22:06 > 0:22:07My childhood was...
0:22:09 > 0:22:11It was difficult,
0:22:11 > 0:22:13which has meant that I've really struggled to form...
0:22:13 > 0:22:16It's OK.
0:22:16 > 0:22:18No, no, it's not, because you're really nice and the last thing
0:22:18 > 0:22:23I want to do is hurt you but you shouldn't be around someone like me.
0:22:25 > 0:22:30From what I can see, you're kind, you're thoughtful...
0:22:30 > 0:22:32I've been to prison.
0:22:34 > 0:22:36OK.
0:22:36 > 0:22:38Can I ask what for? I mean...
0:22:39 > 0:22:41..is it for anything...violent?
0:22:43 > 0:22:44Yeah.
0:22:44 > 0:22:49How violent? I mean, are we talking fight in a pub or worse?
0:22:51 > 0:22:52It's worse.
0:22:53 > 0:22:55How worse?
0:22:59 > 0:23:02Armed robbery.
0:23:02 > 0:23:04Guns?
0:23:04 > 0:23:07Trust me, I would never do anything like that again...
0:23:08 > 0:23:10I just think you deserve to know.
0:23:10 > 0:23:14And I completely understand if you don't want anything to do with me.
0:23:24 > 0:23:25This is ridiculous.
0:23:25 > 0:23:28The magistrates will remand her and she'll be back to square one again.
0:23:28 > 0:23:31Probation services might be able to sort out a bail hostel.
0:23:31 > 0:23:34Yeah, but you and I both know the chances of that.
0:23:34 > 0:23:37Listen, how do you feel about her having a visitor?
0:23:51 > 0:23:53Here's the thing.
0:23:53 > 0:23:55We get on, right?
0:23:56 > 0:23:57Right.
0:23:57 > 0:24:00And just because we've had a few crossed wires,
0:24:00 > 0:24:02doesn't mean we don't get on any more.
0:24:02 > 0:24:04We do.
0:24:04 > 0:24:06We do.
0:24:06 > 0:24:09I know we haven't known each other that long, but I reckon
0:24:09 > 0:24:12when you click with someone, you just click.
0:24:12 > 0:24:14And I miss our click.
0:24:14 > 0:24:15I want our click back.
0:24:17 > 0:24:19I think you're absolutely right,
0:24:19 > 0:24:22I've been feeling all...
0:24:22 > 0:24:25And I didn't know how to say it and I thought you felt differently.
0:24:25 > 0:24:28Course I don't, I feel exactly the same as you do!
0:24:29 > 0:24:33Well, in that case, I think that we should...
0:24:33 > 0:24:37Forget all about it and pretend it never happened. Friends?
0:24:39 > 0:24:40Friends?
0:24:42 > 0:24:44Friends.
0:24:44 > 0:24:45Good then.
0:24:55 > 0:24:59Er, there's someone to see you. If you want to.
0:24:59 > 0:25:00Your social worker.
0:25:00 > 0:25:02What's she doing here?
0:25:02 > 0:25:04I asked her to come.
0:25:04 > 0:25:06She's got copies of the old letters
0:25:06 > 0:25:09and photographs your daughter's parents have sent.
0:25:09 > 0:25:11Look, I know it's hard.
0:25:12 > 0:25:14If you want me to I can come with you.
0:25:14 > 0:25:15Just say the word.
0:25:51 > 0:25:53Can't have been easy, telling me that.
0:25:53 > 0:25:55It's brave, really.
0:25:56 > 0:26:01I've always been so cautious, worry too much to take risks.
0:26:01 > 0:26:05Look, it's fine, you don't have to explain.
0:26:08 > 0:26:11Being scared, it holds you back.
0:26:11 > 0:26:13I don't want to be held back any more.
0:26:19 > 0:26:22None of us is perfect.
0:26:22 > 0:26:26Maybe your past is a bit more...extreme.
0:26:26 > 0:26:29But I'm not interested in the past.
0:26:29 > 0:26:31It's who you are now that matters.
0:26:31 > 0:26:33And if you feel the same...
0:26:35 > 0:26:38I mean, we don't have to rush anything,
0:26:38 > 0:26:41we could take it slowly and see what happens.
0:26:45 > 0:26:47If you like?
0:27:05 > 0:27:08I'm going to be taking over Marcus' life.
0:27:09 > 0:27:11Don't stop on my account.
0:27:11 > 0:27:13Dr Tyler. I know.
0:27:13 > 0:27:15Ah, my reputation precedes me.
0:27:15 > 0:27:17Is running away really the answer?
0:27:17 > 0:27:19What are you, Jeremy Kyle?
0:27:19 > 0:27:20Tango.
0:27:20 > 0:27:23I will teach you the basics. You will not deviate from them
0:27:23 > 0:27:25until I feel you are ready.
0:27:25 > 0:27:27Yes, sir.
0:27:27 > 0:27:29Show-offs will not be tolerated.