A Perfect Evening

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0:00:34 > 0:00:38# It's a beautiful morning

0:00:38 > 0:00:40# Ahh

0:00:40 > 0:00:44# I think I'll go outside For a while

0:00:44 > 0:00:48# And just smile

0:00:48 > 0:00:52# Just take in some Clean fresh air, boy

0:00:52 > 0:00:55# Ain't no sense in staying inside

0:00:55 > 0:00:59# If the weather's fine And you got the time

0:00:59 > 0:01:05# It's your chance to wake up And plan another brand-new day

0:01:05 > 0:01:07# Either way It's a beautiful morning... #

0:01:07 > 0:01:09- Good morning! - BOTH: Morning.

0:01:09 > 0:01:13Another day, another exposure to the flu virus

0:01:13 > 0:01:16a menagerie of ticks, and parasitic worms!

0:01:16 > 0:01:19On the plus side, we're a day closer to our deaths!

0:01:19 > 0:01:21Cheer up! I have coffee!

0:01:21 > 0:01:22Life saver. Two sugars.

0:01:22 > 0:01:26- Any Lapsang Souchong?- Sure, milk and sugar?- I'll make it myself.

0:01:28 > 0:01:30What are you so cheerful about, Tyler?

0:01:30 > 0:01:32You're about to get up close and personal

0:01:32 > 0:01:35- with some very unpleasant germs! - I don't care about today.

0:01:35 > 0:01:38Because when the day is over, I have a perfect evening planned.

0:01:38 > 0:01:41- It involves sex, doesn't it? - Yes, it does!

0:01:41 > 0:01:42Spare us the details.

0:01:42 > 0:01:45- How about you - hot date? - I do, as it happens.

0:01:45 > 0:01:49- Really?- Who is she? - Her name is Dame Joan Sutherland.

0:01:49 > 0:01:50It's her Turandot.

0:01:50 > 0:01:54Zubin Mehta's 1972 recording, with the London Philharmonic.

0:01:54 > 0:01:57- And that's your "perfect evening"? - I think it qualifies.

0:01:57 > 0:02:00I, too, have a perfect evening planned

0:02:00 > 0:02:03- for when the daily grind comes to a halt.- Niamh?

0:02:03 > 0:02:05Yeah, but it's not what you're thinking!

0:02:05 > 0:02:07How do you know what I'm thinking?

0:02:07 > 0:02:09- Heston?- OK, you both know what I'm thinking!

0:02:09 > 0:02:13No, she's just going come over to my place, quiet night in.

0:02:13 > 0:02:14Some pizza and beer.

0:02:14 > 0:02:17- Sounds like a perfect evening. - Let's hope so.

0:02:17 > 0:02:19OK. Whatever tickles your pickle! In the meantime,

0:02:19 > 0:02:23- this will get you through morning surgery.- Let's hope so.

0:02:23 > 0:02:26Think about the evening and it will get you through the day!

0:02:27 > 0:02:28Got nothing else...

0:02:34 > 0:02:35SHE KNOCKS

0:02:35 > 0:02:37SHE BANGS

0:02:38 > 0:02:40SHE KNOCKS

0:02:42 > 0:02:43Good morning!

0:02:43 > 0:02:48- Oh! Nice to see a smiling face in the morning!- Isn't it just?

0:02:48 > 0:02:50It's just brain chemistry and neuroscience.

0:02:50 > 0:02:53I think about pizza and beer and Dr Donoghue,

0:02:53 > 0:02:56the serotonin kicks in, and it tells my body that I am happy,

0:02:56 > 0:03:00- and that it is so.- Well, it's nice to know that romance isn't dead.

0:03:00 > 0:03:02What do you mean?

0:03:02 > 0:03:05Well, you can't just manufacture a romantic evening

0:03:05 > 0:03:08by mixing hormones in a biochemical reaction.

0:03:08 > 0:03:12Well, actually, serotonin is a neurotransmitter, not a hormone.

0:03:12 > 0:03:14- You should know that. - Is that right?

0:03:16 > 0:03:19- I'm going to mess it up, aren't I? - Could you pass me my notes, please?

0:03:21 > 0:03:23- I'll carry them.- Thank you.

0:03:28 > 0:03:30Are you...?

0:03:34 > 0:03:37- Just wondering, how's it going with Oliver?- Oh, fine.

0:03:37 > 0:03:41Thank you for the recommendation. He's very helpful.

0:03:42 > 0:03:45I didn't expect I'd be suffering from depression,

0:03:45 > 0:03:48but it's all sorted now, thanks.

0:03:49 > 0:03:53And the other stuff? The moving things...the memory loss...

0:03:53 > 0:03:56- What memory loss?- Very funny!

0:03:56 > 0:03:59- I'm fine.- Well, that's good!

0:04:00 > 0:04:02Um...

0:04:02 > 0:04:06I was wondering whether sitting all alone, listening to opera,

0:04:06 > 0:04:09might not be the best thing for a recovering depressive...

0:04:09 > 0:04:12- Recovered. - Just a thought, Heston.

0:04:15 > 0:04:16Oh, Emma!

0:04:16 > 0:04:19Tonight, bottle of red wine, enjoying the stereophonic bliss

0:04:19 > 0:04:22that is Dame Joan Sutherland singing Puccini?

0:04:22 > 0:04:26- Could you pass me a bottle of water from the fridge, please?- Of course.

0:04:29 > 0:04:30Puccini?

0:04:30 > 0:04:33Yes, I've never been a fan, to be honest...

0:04:33 > 0:04:35Sorry.

0:04:41 > 0:04:43Oh, um...

0:04:43 > 0:04:45Is everything all right with him?

0:04:47 > 0:04:52- Yeah, I think so.- It's just that he's being a bit strange.

0:04:53 > 0:04:56And now I think about it, Al's being weird, as well -

0:04:56 > 0:04:59is something going on?

0:04:59 > 0:05:00No...

0:05:00 > 0:05:02There is. What is it?

0:05:02 > 0:05:03It's nothing.

0:05:05 > 0:05:07All right, OK, well...

0:05:08 > 0:05:10They're jealous, I reckon.

0:05:10 > 0:05:12Jealous?

0:05:12 > 0:05:15I've got this hot date tonight. She's coming round tonight.

0:05:15 > 0:05:18- You're on a promise.- Yeah, maybe.

0:05:18 > 0:05:21- Oh, you've got to see her, she's young, she's gorgeous...- How young?

0:05:21 > 0:05:24Old enough to know better!

0:05:24 > 0:05:26I've told her I'm in the music industry!

0:05:26 > 0:05:29She thinks I know Lady Gaga, Katy B... All that lot.

0:05:29 > 0:05:34- Does she? Is that a good idea?- Yes.

0:05:34 > 0:05:38When she steps into your upmarket, luxury, two-up-two-down

0:05:38 > 0:05:40she won't think, even for a moment,

0:05:40 > 0:05:44that you might just be a boring GP in Letherbridge?

0:05:46 > 0:05:49You're right... What am I going to do?

0:05:49 > 0:05:52Don't ask me.

0:05:52 > 0:05:54No. Not you. Mandy!

0:05:54 > 0:05:56Mandy will know what to do...

0:05:59 > 0:06:01Right, this is the situation.

0:06:01 > 0:06:03Poppy's coming round tonight - she thinks I'm really cool.

0:06:03 > 0:06:06She thinks I'm in the music industry -

0:06:06 > 0:06:09concerts, record deals, best friends with Simon Cowell -

0:06:09 > 0:06:12the only problem is my house is not cool, and I really, really...

0:06:12 > 0:06:15- ..really, want to get your leg over.- No!

0:06:15 > 0:06:17Yeah.

0:06:17 > 0:06:19You have to tell her the truth.

0:06:19 > 0:06:23I can't do that, not tonight. Tonight's supposed to be perfect.

0:06:23 > 0:06:24SHE TUTS What?

0:06:24 > 0:06:26Maybe it will, maybe it won't.

0:06:26 > 0:06:28Depends if you take my advice, don't it?

0:06:34 > 0:06:36Jimmi, I need to be romantic!

0:06:36 > 0:06:38Ah, Al... Man, you are lovely.

0:06:38 > 0:06:41But I haven't thought of you that way. Can we just stay as friends?

0:06:41 > 0:06:44I'm serious. I don't "get" romance.

0:06:44 > 0:06:46I never have, never will,

0:06:46 > 0:06:48I could. I need a crash course.

0:06:50 > 0:06:52# You must remember this

0:06:52 > 0:06:54# A kiss is still a kiss

0:06:54 > 0:06:57# A sigh is just a sigh... #

0:06:57 > 0:07:00- That's beautiful, but it hasn't helped.- Casablanca.

0:07:00 > 0:07:04Scientifically proven to be the most romantic film in the world, ever.

0:07:04 > 0:07:06Eh? It's a great war film.

0:07:06 > 0:07:09- But I don't think it's meant to be romantic?- Seriously?!

0:07:09 > 0:07:11Oh, I don't know! I am hopeless!

0:07:11 > 0:07:13Is this what Niamh wants? She wants romance?

0:07:13 > 0:07:15It's what I want. It's what I want for her.

0:07:15 > 0:07:20I want it to be perfect. Without me messing it up. Again.

0:07:23 > 0:07:26It's an old recording, but it's the best there is.

0:07:26 > 0:07:28It really is an experience to experience!

0:07:28 > 0:07:32It sounds wonderful, Heston. But I am otherwise engaged this evening.

0:07:32 > 0:07:36- Washing your hair?- No. Well, yes, but only because I'm seeing someone.

0:07:36 > 0:07:39Oh, Al. Yes, of course. He's looking forward to it.

0:07:41 > 0:07:42Mandy.

0:07:42 > 0:07:43Heston...

0:07:43 > 0:07:47You are a vivacious young woman who's out on the town every night.

0:07:47 > 0:07:48- What are you suggesting?- Nothing!

0:07:48 > 0:07:51I was just wondering, what it's like to have a social life.

0:07:51 > 0:07:53- It's not all it's cracked up to be. - Tell me about it!

0:07:53 > 0:07:57Well, as you've both got time on your hands this evening?

0:07:57 > 0:08:00I have a cunning plan. And it's going to be perfect!

0:08:08 > 0:08:11You are getting so grown-up, young lady!

0:08:11 > 0:08:13But not that grown-up!

0:08:13 > 0:08:15Where did you get this from anyway?

0:08:15 > 0:08:19- It's Angela's, she's lending it me. - Is she now?

0:08:20 > 0:08:24- You know she's got a boyfriend! - She's had boyfriends since Year Six.

0:08:24 > 0:08:27This one's a real boyfriend.

0:08:27 > 0:08:29He's much older than her.

0:08:29 > 0:08:31I hope he knows how old she is.

0:08:31 > 0:08:33He makes out he's in the music business -

0:08:33 > 0:08:37- knows all these famous people. - And what is he really?

0:08:37 > 0:08:40He's a doctor. A GP.

0:08:40 > 0:08:42He's actually pretty cool.

0:08:42 > 0:08:46Really? Do Angela's parents know about this?

0:08:46 > 0:08:49You can't tell them! She'll kill me. It's a massive secret.

0:08:49 > 0:08:51Please.

0:08:51 > 0:08:53Is he going to be there tonight?

0:08:53 > 0:08:56No! Just me and Angela. Girlie night out.

0:08:56 > 0:08:57I won't be back late. Promise.

0:08:57 > 0:09:01OK. But I don't think that's a good idea though.

0:09:02 > 0:09:03Yeah, no.

0:09:03 > 0:09:06- Your tea's on the table. - Yeah, I'll be down in a sec.

0:09:17 > 0:09:20Sometimes this place is crazy.

0:09:20 > 0:09:23- I can't, Jimmi.- What?

0:09:23 > 0:09:25Opera. I can't.

0:09:25 > 0:09:28- How bad can it be? - Excruciating.

0:09:28 > 0:09:31Yeah, I know, But he was giving me this "Sad Heston" look on his face.

0:09:31 > 0:09:34- Please, don't make me!- You can't back out now. That's not fair.

0:09:34 > 0:09:35I'm not going to do it on my own!

0:09:35 > 0:09:40You know about music! You can talk to him about...notes and stuff.

0:09:40 > 0:09:43But one-on-one? Nah, I'm not doing that!

0:09:43 > 0:09:45I'll pick you up at seven.

0:09:45 > 0:09:46I hate you, Dr Clay!

0:09:48 > 0:09:50DOOR BELL RINGS

0:10:02 > 0:10:04Wow!

0:10:09 > 0:10:12It's not quite what I expected.

0:10:14 > 0:10:18Well, the office is a little bit more - reoww - you know?

0:10:18 > 0:10:22That's where I keep all the Brit Awards, and the MTV stuff.

0:10:22 > 0:10:24Platinum discs up on the walls.

0:10:24 > 0:10:27- Really?- Yeah, but you can't let that stuff get to you.

0:10:27 > 0:10:29Got to keep yourself grounded.

0:10:29 > 0:10:32So I prefer to have this place a little more...understated.

0:10:32 > 0:10:34That's one word for it.

0:10:37 > 0:10:38I like it.

0:10:38 > 0:10:40You do?

0:10:40 > 0:10:43Yeah, it's comfy.

0:10:43 > 0:10:45Yeah.

0:10:46 > 0:10:49You know, my sister doesn't believe you know Katy B.

0:10:49 > 0:10:51Course I do.

0:10:52 > 0:10:54Can you get us tickets to see her?

0:10:54 > 0:10:58I'll look into it. First thing tomorrow.

0:10:59 > 0:11:00Great.

0:11:03 > 0:11:07UP-TEMPO JAZZ MUSIC

0:11:34 > 0:11:35DOOR BELL RINGS

0:11:49 > 0:11:52Wow, you look amazing.

0:11:53 > 0:11:55You don't look too bad yourself.

0:11:55 > 0:11:57We're through...

0:11:57 > 0:11:59OK.

0:12:04 > 0:12:06KNOCK AT DOOR

0:12:06 > 0:12:09Yes, yes! I'm just coming!

0:12:11 > 0:12:14Hello, hello! Lovely to see you, come in.

0:12:14 > 0:12:17Mandy, Jimmi.

0:12:17 > 0:12:20Mandy, you are looking absolutely radiant!

0:12:20 > 0:12:23Ah, thank you. This is for you.

0:12:23 > 0:12:25Very kind, no need, no need.

0:12:25 > 0:12:28- Lovely! - I haven't brought you anything.

0:12:28 > 0:12:31Well, you brought yourselves, and that's what matters.

0:12:31 > 0:12:34Yourselves, and your ears!

0:12:34 > 0:12:37- I'm really looking forward to it. - Me, too. Just go through, please.

0:12:39 > 0:12:40Lovely...

0:12:42 > 0:12:44You know, she still won't believe you.

0:12:44 > 0:12:46What?

0:12:46 > 0:12:51Lou. Unless they're really, really good tickets.

0:12:51 > 0:12:55- Yeah, of course. - "Access all areas"?

0:12:56 > 0:13:01Tea and cucumber sandwiches in Katy's dressing room. How's that?

0:13:01 > 0:13:04What has your sister got against me, anyway?

0:13:04 > 0:13:06Typical student, thinks she knows everything.

0:13:06 > 0:13:09I thought you were a student.

0:13:09 > 0:13:13She hasn't been a student for ages! She's working now.

0:13:13 > 0:13:16OK, cool, what does she do?

0:13:16 > 0:13:18Does it matter?

0:13:18 > 0:13:20I don't really want to talk about my sister.

0:13:20 > 0:13:23Right, sorry, what do you want to talk about?

0:13:23 > 0:13:26No, I don't really want to talk at all.

0:13:39 > 0:13:43- You know how to treat a girl. - Some girls deserve the best.

0:13:43 > 0:13:45- Champagne?- No, it's a Gueuze.

0:13:45 > 0:13:49It's a Belgian beer. Is that all right?

0:13:49 > 0:13:51Pour me a glass and find out.

0:13:51 > 0:13:53DRINK POURS

0:13:54 > 0:13:56- That's OK.- Oh!

0:13:57 > 0:13:59DRINK POURS

0:14:03 > 0:14:07- And...cheers.- Slainte.

0:14:07 > 0:14:08TINK!

0:14:10 > 0:14:13SHE SPLUTTERS

0:14:13 > 0:14:15Oh...

0:14:16 > 0:14:18Sorry, it's really strong!

0:14:18 > 0:14:23- It is known for its strength. Um... - SHE COUGHS

0:14:23 > 0:14:25I do have some lagers in the fridge...

0:14:25 > 0:14:27- Yeah, that will be better.- OK.- OK.

0:14:29 > 0:14:33SHE COUGHS

0:14:38 > 0:14:41BEETHOVEN'S FIFTH SYMPHONY PLAYS

0:14:47 > 0:14:52- It's very...- Just listen! The first time through, we just listen.

0:14:56 > 0:14:57("The first time"?)

0:15:05 > 0:15:08- Hey, let's play a game. - Good idea...

0:15:08 > 0:15:10No! Not that kind of game!

0:15:10 > 0:15:12Truth or dare...

0:15:15 > 0:15:16You scared?

0:15:18 > 0:15:19No.

0:15:19 > 0:15:21Right, then.

0:15:21 > 0:15:24Who was your first love?

0:15:26 > 0:15:29Elise Warwick. She was 15.

0:15:29 > 0:15:32I was 12. She was major, major league!

0:15:34 > 0:15:37- Oh, we didn't actually... - No, it's fine.

0:15:37 > 0:15:39- Nothing actually happened. - It's fine.

0:15:39 > 0:15:43It was wishful thinking on my part, really wishful thinking.

0:15:43 > 0:15:45She didn't really even know I existed.

0:15:47 > 0:15:49OK, your turn.

0:15:49 > 0:15:51First record you ever bought?

0:15:51 > 0:15:53You mean first download?

0:15:53 > 0:15:55Yeah, first download.

0:15:55 > 0:15:56Um.

0:15:56 > 0:15:58Justin Bieber.

0:15:58 > 0:16:02- # Baby, baby... # - Please, stop!

0:16:02 > 0:16:06- It's totally embarrassing... - It's quite recent, isn't it?

0:16:06 > 0:16:08No, it's not that recent...

0:16:08 > 0:16:10Yeah, it's 2010. I remember...

0:16:10 > 0:16:15Hey, look, it's your turn. Have you ever googled yourself?

0:16:15 > 0:16:17No.

0:16:17 > 0:16:19You're such a little liar!

0:16:20 > 0:16:23That's the second worst line you've come up with tonight!

0:16:23 > 0:16:25- What was the worst? - "We'll always have Letherbridge"!

0:16:25 > 0:16:29- That's a good line!- It was corny when Bogart said it.- No way!

0:16:29 > 0:16:32THEY CHUCKLE

0:16:32 > 0:16:36I've really enjoyed tonight. It wasn't what I was expecting...

0:16:36 > 0:16:37- Pizza and beer...- Yeah.

0:16:37 > 0:16:40The pizza was a bit of a surprise with the silver service.

0:16:40 > 0:16:42I'm a surprising kind of a guy!

0:16:42 > 0:16:43Hm.

0:16:44 > 0:16:47- What?- Nothing.

0:16:47 > 0:16:48No, that wasn't a "nothing" look.

0:16:48 > 0:16:52That was a "I've done something wrong" look.

0:16:52 > 0:16:56- Is it this?- No! It isn't! - I thought it would be romantic.

0:16:56 > 0:16:59OK, you're starting to spoil it a little bit.

0:16:59 > 0:17:01Only a teensy-weensy bit.

0:17:01 > 0:17:02I love all this!

0:17:02 > 0:17:04It's just...

0:17:04 > 0:17:06I don't need it.

0:17:06 > 0:17:08I don't want Humphrey Bogart...

0:17:08 > 0:17:10Really?

0:17:10 > 0:17:13Yeah, he'd drive you mad. All the noble self-sacrifice, ugh.

0:17:14 > 0:17:18- He's kind of cool. - You're kind of cool.

0:17:21 > 0:17:25# Nessun dorma Nessun dorma... #

0:17:27 > 0:17:30- I know this one!- It's Nessun Dorma. Everybody knows this one.

0:17:30 > 0:17:32Oh, yeah! It's, um...

0:17:32 > 0:17:33It's, um...

0:17:33 > 0:17:35Oh, Pavarotti!

0:17:35 > 0:17:38Yeah, it might be, but he's not the only bloke who sang it, is he?

0:17:38 > 0:17:39Actually, it IS Pavarotti.

0:17:39 > 0:17:41SHE CACKLES

0:17:41 > 0:17:44A young Luciano, circa 1972.

0:17:44 > 0:17:46He must have been 38.

0:17:46 > 0:17:48Marvellous voice.

0:17:50 > 0:17:51Effortless.

0:17:54 > 0:17:57Not really your cup of tea, is it?

0:17:57 > 0:17:58Not really.

0:18:00 > 0:18:07- BOTH:- # La la la, la-la, la la la

0:18:07 > 0:18:15# La la la, la-la, la la la la la

0:18:15 > 0:18:22# La-la, la-a-a-a la la la-a!

0:18:22 > 0:18:26# La la... #

0:18:28 > 0:18:31- I'm sorry, I'm such a terrible host. - I wouldn't say that.

0:18:31 > 0:18:33I haven't even shown you the house.

0:18:33 > 0:18:36Upstairs is particularly interesting.

0:18:37 > 0:18:40I'm going to need the complete guided tour, then.

0:18:40 > 0:18:42Then I'll give you the full...

0:18:42 > 0:18:44immersive experience.

0:18:44 > 0:18:47I do have to warn you. It's very...hands on.

0:18:50 > 0:18:52SHE SIGHS

0:18:52 > 0:18:54Do you remember when we first met?

0:18:55 > 0:18:57You wore grey. No.

0:18:57 > 0:18:59You wore blue - the Germans wore grey.

0:18:59 > 0:19:02It was the day they invaded Paris...

0:19:02 > 0:19:04THEY CHUCKLE

0:19:04 > 0:19:07Actually, I don't remember when we met.

0:19:07 > 0:19:09Neither do I.

0:19:16 > 0:19:18SHE CLEARS HER THROAT

0:19:20 > 0:19:23TURANDOT TENOR SOLO PLAYS

0:19:25 > 0:19:27Change this...

0:19:28 > 0:19:31Here we go. Right, you're going to like this.

0:19:33 > 0:19:35HESTON CLEARS THROAT, CDS CLATTER

0:19:38 > 0:19:39Here it comes...

0:19:40 > 0:19:43RIDE OF THE VALKYRIES BY WAGNER PLAYS

0:19:43 > 0:19:45- Oh! # Kill the Wabbit! # - What?!

0:19:45 > 0:19:47Bugs Bunny!

0:19:47 > 0:19:51- # Kill the Wabbit! Kill the Wabbit! #- You're right!

0:19:51 > 0:19:53- BOTH LAUGH - Kill the Wabbit!

0:19:58 > 0:20:02And the piece de resistance, the master bedroom...

0:20:02 > 0:20:05- MOBILE RINGS - Sorry!

0:20:07 > 0:20:09I think it's my sister.

0:20:09 > 0:20:12I'm sorry. Hello?

0:20:13 > 0:20:14- MUM:- 'Where are you?'

0:20:14 > 0:20:16Is there a problem?

0:20:16 > 0:20:17'You tell me.'

0:20:17 > 0:20:21Angela is at home, watching telly with her mum and dad.

0:20:21 > 0:20:22'Hello?!'

0:20:22 > 0:20:24Look, can I call you back?

0:20:24 > 0:20:27Don't you dare hang up on me! And where is that top?

0:20:27 > 0:20:28What top?

0:20:28 > 0:20:31"Angela's top". The one Angela knows nothing about.

0:20:31 > 0:20:33'The one that's NOT in your room.'

0:20:33 > 0:20:34OK, look. I understand.

0:20:34 > 0:20:37Just don't do anything silly - I'll be right over.

0:20:39 > 0:20:41SHE SIGHS

0:20:42 > 0:20:45I'm sorry, it's my sister, a complete drama queen, as usual.

0:20:45 > 0:20:47Man problems. I'm so sorry.

0:21:00 > 0:21:01Cheers.

0:21:05 > 0:21:07So, what we need is time.

0:21:09 > 0:21:12- Time apart? - Time together, you eejit!

0:21:12 > 0:21:15Do I look like a woman who wants to get out of a relationship?!

0:21:15 > 0:21:17You look beautiful.

0:21:17 > 0:21:19Was that Al, or Humph?

0:21:19 > 0:21:22I think that's Al.

0:21:22 > 0:21:23Oh!

0:21:23 > 0:21:25So, more time together...?

0:21:25 > 0:21:28Yeah. That sounds nice.

0:21:29 > 0:21:31I knew you'd agree. Which is why...

0:21:33 > 0:21:36I got Howard to approve leave for both of us for all of next week.

0:21:36 > 0:21:40- What?!- I've booked us a cottage in the Peak District.

0:21:40 > 0:21:41Just north of Bakewell.

0:21:41 > 0:21:42I can't.

0:21:42 > 0:21:45- You can. We can. - That's a really bad idea.

0:21:45 > 0:21:48We'll be stuck in some lonely cottage in the middle of nowhere

0:21:48 > 0:21:50with nothing to say to each other for a whole week!

0:21:50 > 0:21:52You always have something to say.

0:21:52 > 0:21:53Yeah, always the wrong thing.

0:21:53 > 0:21:55That's a really bad idea.

0:21:55 > 0:21:58- It's a brilliant idea. - You're just asking for trouble...

0:21:58 > 0:21:59Look.

0:21:59 > 0:22:03I'm not an axe murderer. And neither are you.

0:22:03 > 0:22:04We'll get along just fine.

0:22:04 > 0:22:07And there's always the bedroom...

0:22:09 > 0:22:10Just one?

0:22:10 > 0:22:13- Yep.- One bed?

0:22:13 > 0:22:14One big bed...

0:22:20 > 0:22:24FLOWER DUET BY DELIBES PLAYS

0:22:24 > 0:22:26Oh, come on, you must know this one!

0:22:26 > 0:22:29- I don't think so. - It's from an advert.

0:22:29 > 0:22:32There was life before adverts, Jimmi!

0:22:32 > 0:22:34It's part of our global patrimony.

0:22:34 > 0:22:38I don't recognise it, Heston. We've not got all your in-depth knowledge.

0:22:38 > 0:22:40It's not in-depth - it's Delibes!

0:22:41 > 0:22:43Delibes! 19th-century French composer.

0:22:43 > 0:22:47- It's the Flower Duet from Lakme. Oh, it's just wasted on you!- Heston!

0:22:47 > 0:22:50No, I'm sorry, sorry. I don't know what happened.

0:22:50 > 0:22:52- I've been under a lot of, um... - Stress? Yeah, we noticed.

0:22:52 > 0:22:55- It's all right. - No, it's not all right!

0:22:55 > 0:22:57You've been very kind to me

0:22:57 > 0:23:00and you've put up with my nonsense, and listened to my music.

0:23:00 > 0:23:03To be honest, I'm not sure I'd have the patience to listen

0:23:03 > 0:23:05to the contents of your MP3 player.

0:23:05 > 0:23:08- Gratuitous insults again. - No, that's not what I meant....

0:23:08 > 0:23:11- I think we'd better go.- Why don't you have another glass of wine?

0:23:11 > 0:23:14- I'm driving.- And I'm in early tomorrow, so...- Yeah, all right.

0:23:14 > 0:23:16Of course.

0:23:22 > 0:23:25- This is just perfect! - I'm sorry, I have to go!

0:23:25 > 0:23:28No, you don't! She's a adult, she can deal with her own problems.

0:23:28 > 0:23:30- You don't know Lou. - Half an hour?

0:23:30 > 0:23:34- "Half an hour"?! - Well, under the circumstances...

0:23:34 > 0:23:36Bye, Kevin. I'll call you about the tickets.

0:23:36 > 0:23:38What?

0:23:38 > 0:23:40Katy B. Access All Areas.

0:23:40 > 0:23:42Oh, yeah, course. Katy B.

0:23:43 > 0:23:44See you.

0:23:52 > 0:23:55Thank you, for a perfect evening.

0:23:55 > 0:23:57Well, it was almost perfect.

0:24:00 > 0:24:01Do you find me attractive?

0:24:03 > 0:24:05More than you know.

0:24:05 > 0:24:09Is it nerves? If you haven't been with anybody for a while...

0:24:11 > 0:24:14You know, to check our compatibility...

0:24:14 > 0:24:17for going away together...

0:24:17 > 0:24:20we could always...test it out...?

0:24:23 > 0:24:26You know, to see if we're...

0:24:26 > 0:24:27compatible.

0:24:30 > 0:24:31Oh!

0:24:37 > 0:24:39I am really sorry.

0:24:39 > 0:24:42I ruined a perfectly lovely evening.

0:24:42 > 0:24:44It's all right. Forget it.

0:24:44 > 0:24:46You are a very warm and generous person.

0:24:46 > 0:24:49- Don't push your luck, mate! - No, all right.

0:24:49 > 0:24:52And I did enjoy our karaoke session.

0:24:52 > 0:24:53Bye, Heston.

0:24:53 > 0:24:55Bye-bye.

0:24:55 > 0:24:56See you.

0:25:00 > 0:25:03MUSIC: FLOWER DUET BY DELIBES

0:25:48 > 0:25:51MUSIC STOPS, CD PLAYER WHIRS

0:26:01 > 0:26:05RIDE OF THE VALKYRIES BY WAGNER PLAYS

0:26:28 > 0:26:30Charlie?

0:26:30 > 0:26:34- Did Charlie give you any explanation?- He didn't dump me, Mum.

0:26:34 > 0:26:36HE YELLS IN PAIN

0:26:36 > 0:26:38Anyone got a camera?

0:26:38 > 0:26:40I've just messed things up with my only daughter.

0:26:40 > 0:26:42Well, go and put them right!

0:26:42 > 0:26:44So, how come we always end up doing the same things?

0:26:44 > 0:26:47- OK, what do you want to do? - Surprise me, but make it worth it.