Old Flames

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0:00:27 > 0:00:28- All down his legs, it was.- Yeah.

0:00:28 > 0:00:31Over the bench, over the floor.

0:00:31 > 0:00:33Had to scrape up a pair of trackie bottoms

0:00:33 > 0:00:35and herd him into the drunk cell.

0:00:35 > 0:00:36Now he needs his inhaler.

0:00:36 > 0:00:39Whoever's next in cell two's going to want to give up inhaling

0:00:39 > 0:00:40altogether, the way it stinks.

0:00:40 > 0:00:42Just make sure the report's on my desk, yeah?

0:00:42 > 0:00:47- Evening.- Got a customer waiting. Needs a hose down.

0:00:47 > 0:00:48Enjoy your Friday-night rush.

0:00:48 > 0:00:50'Get off!'

0:00:50 > 0:00:51'Get... Get off me.'

0:00:51 > 0:00:54Take it easy, mate.

0:00:54 > 0:00:55I was just sleeping it off!

0:00:55 > 0:00:56Only started her up for the heater!

0:00:56 > 0:00:58Why don't we just calm it right down?

0:00:58 > 0:01:00You tell them to calm it!

0:01:00 > 0:01:01I ain't done nothing!

0:01:01 > 0:01:03- Get off me!- Oi, come on!

0:01:03 > 0:01:05All right, guys.

0:01:05 > 0:01:07Spread 'em.

0:01:07 > 0:01:08Comfy now, yeah?

0:01:12 > 0:01:14What's your name?

0:01:14 > 0:01:16Joe. King. As in "you must be".

0:01:28 > 0:01:30Joe Dandridge.

0:01:30 > 0:01:32HGV driver, eh?

0:01:33 > 0:01:35Right, I'll get customer number one sorted.

0:01:35 > 0:01:36No hurry.

0:01:36 > 0:01:37Agh!

0:01:40 > 0:01:41Oh, night-night.

0:01:41 > 0:01:43You got something good on?

0:01:43 > 0:01:45No, no. Just a quiet night in.

0:01:45 > 0:01:48Well, we've got prosecco, pizza, and then let the games begin!

0:01:48 > 0:01:50- Ooh.- What games?

0:01:50 > 0:01:55Oh, just some board games, you know? "Bored" being the operative word.

0:01:55 > 0:01:57Fantastic!

0:01:57 > 0:01:59I haven't played any board games for ages.

0:01:59 > 0:02:01Monopoly used to be my favourite.

0:02:01 > 0:02:04Oh, we haven't got that one.

0:02:04 > 0:02:05Oh, never mind.

0:02:05 > 0:02:07I'm sure we'll find something.

0:02:07 > 0:02:09To be honest, it's just great to have a night out

0:02:09 > 0:02:11and celebrate the end of my chemo.

0:02:11 > 0:02:13Of course.

0:02:13 > 0:02:15Well, the more the merrier.

0:02:15 > 0:02:17Great. Well, I'll see you later.

0:02:19 > 0:02:21- Open her up.- Oh, cheers, sir, we'll take him through.

0:02:21 > 0:02:23Nah, you've got your hands full.

0:02:23 > 0:02:25You're supposed to be finishing off that report.

0:02:25 > 0:02:28Also, you need to get that breathalyser seen to. It's on the blink.

0:02:28 > 0:02:30- One test says over, the next under. - I told you I hadn't had many.

0:02:30 > 0:02:32Well, you can't hold your beer, then, can you?

0:02:32 > 0:02:34You better pencil in a blood test.

0:02:34 > 0:02:35Cell two, yeah?

0:02:38 > 0:02:40He's a bit hands-on.

0:02:40 > 0:02:43Friday night. We can always do with an extra pair of hands.

0:02:45 > 0:02:46There you go.

0:02:46 > 0:02:47I'll take it from here, yeah?

0:02:47 > 0:02:52- Stinks!- Yeah, that mellow yellow aroma with a top note of...

0:02:53 > 0:02:55What is that?

0:02:55 > 0:02:56Cheap bleach, I think.

0:02:57 > 0:02:59Last tenant wanted out, too, for some reason,

0:02:59 > 0:03:01- so make yourself at home.- Whatever.

0:03:03 > 0:03:05I was going to sleep it off anyway.

0:03:15 > 0:03:17Hello?

0:03:17 > 0:03:18Oh, G...

0:03:18 > 0:03:21Barry! What are you doing, creeping around in the dark?

0:03:21 > 0:03:24I wasn't! I mean, it wasn't dark until it was.

0:03:24 > 0:03:27Yes, well, that tends to happen when the sun goes down.

0:03:27 > 0:03:29It's just...I was waiting outside for a while,

0:03:29 > 0:03:32and I didn't want to miss my chance.

0:03:32 > 0:03:34Your chance for what? Scare the living daylights out of me?

0:03:34 > 0:03:37No, no, no. That's the last thing I... Erm...

0:03:37 > 0:03:39I was, er...

0:03:39 > 0:03:42just wondering if you, er...

0:03:42 > 0:03:44might be wanting some dinner.

0:03:44 > 0:03:46I mean out with me.

0:03:46 > 0:03:47Tonight.

0:03:47 > 0:03:51You know, just to talk or you talk

0:03:51 > 0:03:52and me listen.

0:03:52 > 0:03:54Oh.

0:03:54 > 0:03:58Well, that's very last minute and I've got plans.

0:03:58 > 0:04:00Yeah, course.

0:04:00 > 0:04:02Someone like you, Friday night.

0:04:03 > 0:04:06Well, it was just a thought.

0:04:06 > 0:04:08And a lovely one.

0:04:10 > 0:04:13Yes. Right, then.

0:04:13 > 0:04:14Enjoy.

0:04:19 > 0:04:20I'm stuffed!

0:04:20 > 0:04:22That was spot-on, love.

0:04:24 > 0:04:28Makes a nice change to spend the night in together, doesn't it?

0:04:28 > 0:04:30Mm.

0:04:30 > 0:04:32Although you do seem to be somewhere else tonight.

0:04:32 > 0:04:33Is everything all right? What's up?

0:04:33 > 0:04:36Yeah, it's fine. I just want to put the dishwasher on.

0:04:36 > 0:04:38Leave the dishwasher.

0:04:38 > 0:04:41Come with me and let's watch some rubbish TV.

0:04:41 > 0:04:44You can tell me what you've been up to all week.

0:04:44 > 0:04:47Oh, you know, the usual.

0:04:47 > 0:04:50- How about you?- The usual. What shall we watch?

0:04:50 > 0:04:52Oh, erm...

0:04:55 > 0:04:57Erm...

0:04:57 > 0:05:01Wild Cops? "High-speed car chases in Luton."

0:05:01 > 0:05:04No, Karen, choose something that you want to watch.

0:05:04 > 0:05:06Well, that's always fun.

0:05:08 > 0:05:09Really?

0:05:09 > 0:05:11Old Flames.

0:05:11 > 0:05:13"Couples track down their exes. Where will it all lead?"

0:05:14 > 0:05:17Great. Old Flames it is, then.

0:05:18 > 0:05:20I'm just going to put the kettle on.

0:05:22 > 0:05:23HATCH CLANGS

0:05:24 > 0:05:26Just do one, will you?

0:05:28 > 0:05:30Got nothing better to do?

0:05:32 > 0:05:34No.

0:05:34 > 0:05:36No shocker you're on your tod on a Friday night.

0:05:36 > 0:05:38You're the one out drinking alone.

0:05:38 > 0:05:40Trucker, aren't I?

0:05:40 > 0:05:42Don't know anyone.

0:05:42 > 0:05:43You know me, now.

0:05:45 > 0:05:46And I know you, don't I?

0:05:46 > 0:05:48You're asking me out?

0:05:48 > 0:05:49You're not my type.

0:05:49 > 0:05:52No, you're not going anywhere for a while.

0:05:52 > 0:05:54Probably kiss your trucking licence goodbye, too.

0:05:54 > 0:05:56I keep telling you!

0:05:56 > 0:05:57I've not done nothing!

0:05:57 > 0:05:59We both know that's not true, don't we?

0:06:05 > 0:06:08- Just about ready for him, now. - Like I said, no hurry.

0:06:08 > 0:06:09'Just leave us alone!'

0:06:10 > 0:06:14- You heard him.- Might as well get him done before the rush.

0:06:14 > 0:06:18More of a uniform job, isn't it, ferrying people back and forth?

0:06:18 > 0:06:20Yeah. They're busy, aren't they?

0:06:20 > 0:06:22All hands to the pump.

0:06:22 > 0:06:26- They usually manage.- Yeah, like they managed to bungle it on the way in?

0:06:27 > 0:06:30Either way, he's down for a blood test

0:06:30 > 0:06:33and I need to check his nose, clean it up, make sure it's not broken.

0:06:34 > 0:06:37- Anything else?- Nope.

0:06:37 > 0:06:40I'll run him right over for you to kiss it better.

0:06:48 > 0:06:51It was just supposed to be a bit of a laugh, you know?

0:06:51 > 0:06:54Bit of wine, nice buzz, just us.

0:06:54 > 0:06:55I know.

0:06:55 > 0:06:57Have to watch what games we play.

0:06:57 > 0:07:00- Operation's out for a start. - Yeah, so is Game Of Life.

0:07:02 > 0:07:04I think I might give it a miss, get an early night.

0:07:04 > 0:07:05No!

0:07:05 > 0:07:08It'll still be a laugh. It is just us.

0:07:08 > 0:07:10Just...plus one.

0:07:10 > 0:07:12Well, look who's arrived with the pizzas!

0:07:12 > 0:07:14Hi, girlfriends!

0:07:14 > 0:07:18Oh, I didn't know about the pyjamas, but I have brought bubbly.

0:07:18 > 0:07:20So, time to live it up!

0:07:20 > 0:07:22I've got a spare onesie that my sister sent me,

0:07:22 > 0:07:23if you want to borrow that.

0:07:23 > 0:07:25Yeah, why not?

0:07:25 > 0:07:27I'm game for anything!

0:07:27 > 0:07:29DOORBELL RINGS

0:07:29 > 0:07:32Oh! That'll be Barry.

0:07:32 > 0:07:34You did say the more the merrier.

0:07:34 > 0:07:35Yes. Yes, we did.

0:07:35 > 0:07:37Right, I'll let him in.

0:07:40 > 0:07:41What a mug!

0:07:41 > 0:07:43Basket-weaving, my arm.

0:07:43 > 0:07:46She's off for some how's your father with whatsisname.

0:07:46 > 0:07:48Yeah!

0:07:50 > 0:07:51Are you not enjoying this?

0:07:51 > 0:07:53No, course I am.

0:07:53 > 0:07:54I've not put any sugar in this.

0:08:01 > 0:08:05I'm sorry. I didn't mean to get you all out of bed.

0:08:05 > 0:08:07Not that you were all in bed

0:08:07 > 0:08:08together, or...

0:08:08 > 0:08:11No, this is just what we do on Games Night.

0:08:11 > 0:08:13Oh, I see.

0:08:13 > 0:08:16Well, I'm afraid I don't own any pyjamas.

0:08:16 > 0:08:19With the chafing and riding up,

0:08:19 > 0:08:20you're better off without.

0:08:20 > 0:08:22There's an image.

0:08:22 > 0:08:24Might have another spare onesie somewhere.

0:08:24 > 0:08:27Oh, you're all right, Barry, as you are. It's fine.

0:08:29 > 0:08:30So, erm...

0:08:33 > 0:08:36What kind of games do you play at these get-togethers, then?

0:08:36 > 0:08:38Ha-ha. Do you know what? It's even got a bum-flap.

0:08:38 > 0:08:40That's handy!

0:08:49 > 0:08:50Behave.

0:08:50 > 0:08:52I think I can take it from here.

0:08:52 > 0:08:55Think so, yeah? If he gets lairy again...

0:08:55 > 0:08:56He seems a lot calmer now.

0:09:02 > 0:09:03Yeah, don't say I didn't warn you.

0:09:11 > 0:09:14Naughty, naughty, don't do that.

0:09:18 > 0:09:20Ooh, yes.

0:09:20 > 0:09:21Hold that position for me.

0:09:23 > 0:09:25If you could look up for me?

0:09:25 > 0:09:26I can do it myself.

0:09:34 > 0:09:35How's it feeling now?

0:09:37 > 0:09:40Like some cop dragged me from my cab and smacked my face with the door.

0:09:42 > 0:09:43Doesn't seem broken.

0:09:43 > 0:09:45Any other injuries?

0:09:45 > 0:09:47Oh, nah.

0:09:47 > 0:09:48Apart from my arm he tied in a knot.

0:09:50 > 0:09:52Still feels knackered.

0:09:52 > 0:09:54You want me to take a look?

0:09:54 > 0:09:57I want to be left alone for a kip.

0:09:57 > 0:09:58Only take a moment.

0:09:58 > 0:09:59I said no.

0:10:00 > 0:10:03OK. Like I said, I'll have to take some blood, if that's OK?

0:10:03 > 0:10:04Oh, I got a choice?

0:10:37 > 0:10:39Had much to drink?

0:10:40 > 0:10:43Any drugs in your system? The test's going to show most things up.

0:10:43 > 0:10:45I'm not a druggie, all right?

0:10:46 > 0:10:48First drink I've had in years.

0:10:48 > 0:10:50And I didn't have many.

0:10:50 > 0:10:54I was going to sleep it off till they come steaming in.

0:10:55 > 0:10:57I'm on a layover.

0:10:57 > 0:10:59Got another job in the city tomorrow

0:10:59 > 0:11:01and I know the area.

0:11:01 > 0:11:04But, being back here, I needed a drink.

0:11:05 > 0:11:07I used to be a heavy drinker,

0:11:07 > 0:11:09but I learnt my lesson way back

0:11:09 > 0:11:12not to drag anyone else down with me.

0:11:12 > 0:11:14I mean, why would I risk my licence?

0:11:15 > 0:11:17Except they're going to have it off me anyway, aren't they?

0:11:17 > 0:11:19If he's got anything to do with it.

0:11:22 > 0:11:26We could start with a game of strip Scrabble?

0:11:26 > 0:11:28SHE LAUGHS

0:11:28 > 0:11:31Followed by a good old chess-mating session.

0:11:31 > 0:11:32Stop it.

0:11:32 > 0:11:34No-one's going to sink my battleship!

0:11:34 > 0:11:36They're just teasing you, Barry.

0:11:36 > 0:11:38Ah, well, that's a relief.

0:11:38 > 0:11:40What about Othello?

0:11:40 > 0:11:41What?

0:11:41 > 0:11:43I think we should play Quiz Bang.

0:11:43 > 0:11:44Ooh, that sounds hard.

0:11:44 > 0:11:46No, it's half answering questions

0:11:46 > 0:11:48and the other half being really silly.

0:11:48 > 0:11:51So, you divide yourself into two teams

0:11:51 > 0:11:53and one person from the team nominates another person

0:11:53 > 0:11:56to either answer a question or do an impression

0:11:56 > 0:11:58and the rest have to guess, and so on.

0:11:58 > 0:12:01So, when you nominate it's like, "I Quiz Bang...you!"

0:12:03 > 0:12:04OK.

0:12:04 > 0:12:06- Home team versus away team?- OK.

0:12:23 > 0:12:25All done. No fuss.

0:12:25 > 0:12:26Spectacular. Lucky you.

0:12:27 > 0:12:30Look, I know he was a bit lairy before, but maybe...

0:12:30 > 0:12:31Oh, here we go.

0:12:32 > 0:12:35Maybe he wasn't really planning to drive.

0:12:35 > 0:12:36Look, Mr Nanny State,

0:12:36 > 0:12:37I would have thought, you know,

0:12:37 > 0:12:40being a doctor, you'd be more worried about the damage

0:12:40 > 0:12:43he could have done drunk behind the wheel of a 15-tonne truck, but no.

0:12:43 > 0:12:47- I'm just saying maybe...- Maybe leave the police work to the police.

0:12:52 > 0:12:53- SHE HUMS A TUNE - Britney Spears.

0:12:53 > 0:12:57- This is fun, isn't it? - Stevie Wonder?- Yes. Fun.

0:12:57 > 0:12:58Oh, the Gangsta's Paradise guys?

0:12:58 > 0:13:00Oh, come on!

0:13:00 > 0:13:02Oh, I've been looking forward to this.

0:13:04 > 0:13:06Oh! Destiny's Child! Survivor!

0:13:06 > 0:13:08- Yes!- In your face!

0:13:08 > 0:13:09Come on.

0:13:11 > 0:13:12Ooh.

0:13:14 > 0:13:16Another impression.

0:13:16 > 0:13:17Showtime. Quiz Bang you!

0:13:17 > 0:13:19All right. OK. Erm...

0:13:19 > 0:13:20OK.

0:13:20 > 0:13:22Er?

0:13:22 > 0:13:24SHE HUMS A TUNE

0:13:24 > 0:13:26It's my first one since chemo.

0:13:26 > 0:13:27My last chemo!

0:13:30 > 0:13:32Diana Ross?

0:13:32 > 0:13:34- Bottoms up! - Madonna! Like A Virgin?

0:13:34 > 0:13:35Yes!

0:13:35 > 0:13:37- Diana Ross? - Did you hear yourself?

0:13:39 > 0:13:41They make a good team, don't they?

0:14:07 > 0:14:09Can't sleep, eh?

0:14:09 > 0:14:11Something on your mind?

0:14:11 > 0:14:13Why can't you just leave me alone?

0:14:14 > 0:14:16Yeah.

0:14:16 > 0:14:19Bit of a lightweight, really, aren't you?

0:14:19 > 0:14:21Don't care who else you hurt, though, do you?

0:14:21 > 0:14:24I wasn't going to drive.

0:14:24 > 0:14:25Not just tonight.

0:14:33 > 0:14:35Hellfire Bikers Club, isn't it?

0:14:37 > 0:14:38Was another life.

0:14:41 > 0:14:43So, what happened?

0:14:43 > 0:14:45You kicked the whole open road, free spirit thing,

0:14:45 > 0:14:46for the grandad version?

0:14:46 > 0:14:50- Whatever.- No, you don't! This is your wake-up call!

0:14:54 > 0:14:56MOBILE PHONE RINGTONE: Theme From The Sweeney

0:14:56 > 0:14:58Sorry, love.

0:14:59 > 0:15:01I will take this. It's work.

0:15:02 > 0:15:03Hello?

0:15:03 > 0:15:06Rob, it's Jimmi. Sorry to bother you at home.

0:15:06 > 0:15:08Hi, mate, what's up?

0:15:08 > 0:15:11It's probably nothing.

0:15:11 > 0:15:15I just wondered if you'd crossed paths with DI Larkin recently?

0:15:17 > 0:15:18Not really. Why?

0:15:19 > 0:15:23Well, we've got this suspected drink-driver

0:15:23 > 0:15:25and there's been a bit of argy-bargy.

0:15:25 > 0:15:27Larkin got involved.

0:15:27 > 0:15:29Now we're striking sparks.

0:15:29 > 0:15:30- Nothing new there, then?- No.

0:15:30 > 0:15:33I just wondered if there was anything else needling him.

0:15:33 > 0:15:35He doesn't seem to want to let it go.

0:15:36 > 0:15:38Sorry, mate, I haven't got a clue,

0:15:38 > 0:15:41but you know what the suits are like.

0:15:41 > 0:15:45They stick their noses where they like, and ours is not to reason why.

0:15:45 > 0:15:49Have a chat with the Custody Sergeant if you're worried.

0:15:49 > 0:15:50Yeah, of course. Sorry.

0:15:50 > 0:15:52I just wanted to check I wasn't missing anything.

0:15:52 > 0:15:53OK. Cheers.

0:15:58 > 0:16:00Who was that? You missed the end.

0:16:03 > 0:16:06I think there's a lot of things I'm missing.

0:16:12 > 0:16:14So, where are you going now?

0:16:14 > 0:16:16You going to get some more milk? Get some more biscuits?

0:16:16 > 0:16:19Get some more sugar for your tea?

0:16:19 > 0:16:20Unless, of course,

0:16:20 > 0:16:22there's another reason why you want to go into the kitchen?

0:16:22 > 0:16:24What's the matter with you?

0:16:24 > 0:16:25I'm asking the questions.

0:16:25 > 0:16:28So why have you been sloping off up there?

0:16:28 > 0:16:31Are you asking me to account for my movements?

0:16:31 > 0:16:32Yes, I am.

0:16:34 > 0:16:36Will you stop treating me like a criminal?

0:16:36 > 0:16:38Then stop acting like a criminal.

0:16:38 > 0:16:41You've barely spent five minutes sat down next to me here.

0:16:41 > 0:16:44You've just been on the phone. I've done nothing wrong.

0:16:44 > 0:16:45You sure about that?

0:16:46 > 0:16:48I've nothing to hide.

0:16:48 > 0:16:51Then why have you changed your password on your tablet?

0:16:52 > 0:16:54Have you been checking up on me?

0:16:54 > 0:16:55I want the truth.

0:17:02 > 0:17:05I just need to take another quick look at Mr Dandridge.

0:17:05 > 0:17:07You'll need a telescope, then.

0:17:07 > 0:17:09Bailed him, pending the results of his blood test.

0:17:09 > 0:17:11- He's picking up his keys tomorrow. - He's left the building?

0:17:11 > 0:17:14Yep, just like Elvis.

0:17:14 > 0:17:16Except Elvis didn't have DI Larkin chauffeuring him

0:17:16 > 0:17:17back to a B&B to sleep it off.

0:17:20 > 0:17:24- Where we going?- Don't know yet, but we'll think of something.

0:17:24 > 0:17:26- How about one for the road? - Don't want a drink.

0:17:26 > 0:17:28What sort of biker are you?

0:17:28 > 0:17:31Thought you lot just wanted to torch the world and watch it burn?

0:17:31 > 0:17:34- Told you. That was a lifetime ago. - Yeah. You got that right.

0:17:35 > 0:17:38You see, my mum watched her world burn.

0:17:39 > 0:17:42Don't know how she felt.

0:17:42 > 0:17:44They don't tell kids stuff like that.

0:17:44 > 0:17:47Even if they did, I was only two.

0:17:47 > 0:17:48I can imagine.

0:17:50 > 0:17:53In fact, I've spent 30 years imagining,

0:17:53 > 0:17:56thinking what I'd do if I ever ran into the bloke who torched the place.

0:17:56 > 0:17:59Stevie?

0:17:59 > 0:18:01- All right, Dad. - Hey.

0:18:01 > 0:18:03How's the arm? You said it was knackered.

0:18:03 > 0:18:05Is it numb? Did you mean numb?

0:18:05 > 0:18:07If it's that bad he can go to hospital. I'll take him myself.

0:18:07 > 0:18:08Smile for me.

0:18:10 > 0:18:13OK, just rest in there a moment, and you, you can phone an ambulance.

0:18:13 > 0:18:16I don't think he's drunk. I think he might be having a stroke.

0:18:16 > 0:18:17Watch your head.

0:18:20 > 0:18:22Come on.

0:18:23 > 0:18:25Two, three...

0:18:25 > 0:18:27Er, Brain Box, General Knowledge. Who's answering?

0:18:27 > 0:18:29Oh, I don't know. You choose.

0:18:29 > 0:18:32Oh, no. Lady's choice, I think.

0:18:32 > 0:18:34- Guys, the timer! - Oh, Quiz Bang you!

0:18:38 > 0:18:41What is the capital of Papua New Guinea?

0:18:41 > 0:18:42Port Moresby.

0:18:43 > 0:18:45Everyone knows that.

0:18:50 > 0:18:51Brain Box.

0:18:53 > 0:18:57What is the gestation period of a kangaroo?

0:18:57 > 0:18:59That, I don't know.

0:18:59 > 0:19:02Well, it depends what kangaroo and whether you mean inside the body or out.

0:19:02 > 0:19:05I mean, your red kangaroo would be something like 33 days inside

0:19:05 > 0:19:08and 190 in the pouch, so eight months total.

0:19:08 > 0:19:10But even after that they go back in for extended periods.

0:19:10 > 0:19:14Correct. Well, the card just says eight months, but...

0:19:14 > 0:19:16Right. Ooh, come on, Brain Box, Brain Box.

0:19:18 > 0:19:22- Oh.- Show Time! Yes!

0:19:22 > 0:19:23- Er, Quiz Bang you!- Oh.

0:19:29 > 0:19:30OK, busted.

0:19:32 > 0:19:34It was just a bit of fun.

0:19:34 > 0:19:36A girl's got to have some vice in life.

0:19:40 > 0:19:43- Please.- Whatever it is, I don't want to hear it.- I just want to explain.

0:19:43 > 0:19:46- Try and keep it calm.- What, how you murdered my mum and put me in care?

0:19:46 > 0:19:48- No. Yes. I was there. - I know that.

0:19:48 > 0:19:50- It was my fault. - I know it was!

0:19:50 > 0:19:52Easy.

0:19:52 > 0:19:54Me and your mum had split.

0:19:54 > 0:19:57She thought we were bad for each other

0:19:57 > 0:19:58and you.

0:19:58 > 0:20:01- Me and her drinking... - No, no way. Don't you dare say...

0:20:01 > 0:20:05We were talking about getting back together again.

0:20:05 > 0:20:07We got hammered.

0:20:07 > 0:20:08As usual.

0:20:09 > 0:20:12Cath and her roll-ups.

0:20:12 > 0:20:14She must have left one burning somewhere.

0:20:14 > 0:20:16Maybe this could keep till later?

0:20:16 > 0:20:18Where's the ambulance?

0:20:18 > 0:20:21Time I woke up, everything's on fire.

0:20:23 > 0:20:24I got you out.

0:20:24 > 0:20:26The whole place had gone up.

0:20:27 > 0:20:28Your mum.

0:20:31 > 0:20:35How could I see you after that and explain?

0:20:35 > 0:20:37You didn't, did you? You just do a runner.

0:20:38 > 0:20:39Cos she was right.

0:20:40 > 0:20:41Look at you.

0:20:44 > 0:20:46You're better off without me.

0:20:46 > 0:20:47SIRENS

0:20:47 > 0:20:49Joe? Joe?

0:20:51 > 0:20:52No! Don't you dare.

0:20:53 > 0:20:55Joe.

0:21:00 > 0:21:01- Eric Morecambe.- Yes!

0:21:01 > 0:21:03No way!

0:21:04 > 0:21:08Show Time again. Ooh, Quiz Bang me!

0:21:14 > 0:21:15Er? Paul Newman in Hud.

0:21:15 > 0:21:17Yes!

0:21:17 > 0:21:18That's just random.

0:21:20 > 0:21:23- We win.- No, you've got to be cheating!

0:21:23 > 0:21:25We are not. We're just simpatico.

0:21:27 > 0:21:29Yeah, under the table.

0:21:29 > 0:21:31Well, we've been well and truly trounced.

0:21:31 > 0:21:34Well, since it's show time again,

0:21:34 > 0:21:37I have got something that I would like to show.

0:21:37 > 0:21:40- Yeah?- Yeah, I just need some more of this.- Ooh.

0:21:42 > 0:21:44Hmm, hmm.

0:21:45 > 0:21:47VELCRO RIPPING BARRY COUGHS

0:21:47 > 0:21:48Oh, my.

0:21:50 > 0:21:53When did you get that?

0:21:53 > 0:21:54Last week.

0:21:54 > 0:21:56It was the last thing on my bucket list.

0:21:56 > 0:21:59Valerie, you do know that you're supposed to wait

0:21:59 > 0:22:01a while after having chemo, don't you?

0:22:01 > 0:22:04Yes, well, I'm already living dangerously, so...

0:22:04 > 0:22:07Wait there. What the hell is it?

0:22:07 > 0:22:09It's Wonder Woman, obviously.

0:22:09 > 0:22:11Quite fitting, I thought.

0:22:11 > 0:22:13She looks a bit upset, though.

0:22:13 > 0:22:15She's got a face like a slapped bum!

0:22:15 > 0:22:17So would you if you'd had Valerie sitting on it all day.

0:22:17 > 0:22:20She's probably WONDERing how she got there!

0:22:20 > 0:22:21THEY LAUGH

0:22:21 > 0:22:24Well, I think it's very daring.

0:22:24 > 0:22:25OK, erm...

0:22:25 > 0:22:27I think it's time to tidy up.

0:22:27 > 0:22:28Yeah.

0:22:28 > 0:22:30And I thought tonight wouldn't be a laugh.

0:22:46 > 0:22:48The scan ruled out a stroke,

0:22:48 > 0:22:50so they're thinking it must have been a TIA,

0:22:50 > 0:22:53which is like a mini-stroke.

0:22:53 > 0:22:56But with the correct treatment he should pull through.

0:22:58 > 0:23:00What were you going to do?

0:23:01 > 0:23:03Not sure.

0:23:04 > 0:23:05Maybe...

0:23:07 > 0:23:10..something stupid. Chuck my whole career. I don't know.

0:23:13 > 0:23:16See, the irony is, he might be what made me join the force in the first place.

0:23:17 > 0:23:19Parents. Can't live with them...

0:23:19 > 0:23:20Or trust them.

0:23:23 > 0:23:25All those things he said about my mum.

0:23:28 > 0:23:30In, er...

0:23:30 > 0:23:32In my experience,

0:23:32 > 0:23:35people who think that they might not have long

0:23:35 > 0:23:38usually don't spend their last moments lying.

0:23:43 > 0:23:45All the things I imagined doing and saying

0:23:45 > 0:23:48if I ever saw him face-to-face,

0:23:48 > 0:23:51and then he goes and puts himself in hospital before I could...

0:23:54 > 0:23:56You could probably go in now if you want.

0:23:58 > 0:24:00No. 30-odd years.

0:24:01 > 0:24:03It's too late to kiss it better now.

0:24:10 > 0:24:12So, you're gambling, really?

0:24:12 > 0:24:15No, spread betting on the financial markets.

0:24:15 > 0:24:17£300 stake.

0:24:17 > 0:24:19Had a few losses earlier, but now I'm back on track.

0:24:21 > 0:24:22What did you think I was doing?

0:24:25 > 0:24:26I don't know.

0:24:26 > 0:24:28But I think you're a mug!

0:24:28 > 0:24:30300 quid is a lot of money for a flutter.

0:24:30 > 0:24:32Well, I'm a mug with 350 quid now.

0:24:39 > 0:24:41TV COMES ON

0:24:41 > 0:24:42SHE SIGHS

0:25:12 > 0:25:14Well, I must say,

0:25:14 > 0:25:17you certainly seem to be throwing yourself into the spirit of things.

0:25:17 > 0:25:19Well, you have to live for the moment, don't you?

0:25:21 > 0:25:22When moments are all you have.

0:25:28 > 0:25:30You haven't had...

0:25:32 > 0:25:33..bad news?

0:25:33 > 0:25:35No, no.

0:25:35 > 0:25:37The chemo's all finished.

0:25:37 > 0:25:38It's, erm...

0:25:41 > 0:25:46It's now just a two-week wait, to find out if the tumour's shrunk.

0:25:49 > 0:25:51And if it hasn't...

0:25:53 > 0:25:54..I don't know.

0:25:57 > 0:25:59I don't think I can face chemo again.

0:26:19 > 0:26:21How about a rematch this Friday?

0:26:21 > 0:26:24I don't think I could cope, losing again.

0:26:24 > 0:26:26And I've got to see a friend. In hospital.

0:26:26 > 0:26:30You're all heart, you are. I bet you're a doctor, eh?

0:26:30 > 0:26:32Wow, it's like you're psychic or something.

0:26:32 > 0:26:35Valerie, everything all right?

0:26:35 > 0:26:36It's my chemo.

0:26:36 > 0:26:38Yeah?

0:26:38 > 0:26:39It hasn't worked.