0:00:24 > 0:00:27So you're probably going to be up to your neck in it today.
0:00:27 > 0:00:29I will pick up some lunch for you.
0:00:29 > 0:00:32I won't be, but thank you, that's sweet.
0:00:32 > 0:00:34It's going to be OK today.
0:00:34 > 0:00:35I know.
0:00:35 > 0:00:37What?
0:00:37 > 0:00:40- Spit it out, Daniel.- What?
0:00:40 > 0:00:45Whatever it is you're bursting to say. Probably something about me
0:00:45 > 0:00:48remembering to use my softer, more naturally, empathetic side.
0:00:48 > 0:00:52Funnily enough, I was going to remind you that some people
0:00:52 > 0:00:55find this kind of day a little stressful.
0:00:55 > 0:00:58So, yes, a more tactful approach is generally better.
0:00:58 > 0:01:00I can do tact.
0:01:00 > 0:01:02Sid's appraisal went really well.
0:01:02 > 0:01:05All I have to do is ask the questions, tick the boxes, let them
0:01:05 > 0:01:08waffle on a little bit and then say, "Well done," and show them
0:01:08 > 0:01:09to the door with a winning smile.
0:01:09 > 0:01:12Not sure that's exactly what Anthony had in mind.
0:01:12 > 0:01:15As far as I'm concerned it's going to be a cushy day with no patients
0:01:15 > 0:01:18and in between appraisals I can blitz breast-feeding reports.
0:01:18 > 0:01:21All right. Good luck.
0:01:21 > 0:01:24Thank you, but luck doesn't come into it.
0:01:30 > 0:01:32Do we have a full appointment schedule today?
0:01:32 > 0:01:34- Yes. Completely full.- That's my repeat prescriptions done.
0:01:34 > 0:01:38But we are going to have to do a lot of juggling, because of these appraisals.
0:01:38 > 0:01:40Well, do your best to spread the work load as evenly as you can.
0:01:40 > 0:01:42We're all going to have put our shoulders to the wheel.
0:01:42 > 0:01:44- Morning.- Hi.
0:01:44 > 0:01:45All set for the appraisals?
0:01:45 > 0:01:47Yes. Yes, I'm ready.
0:01:47 > 0:01:50Excellent. I did a lot of research compiling the new forms.
0:01:50 > 0:01:52- Actually I did have one query. - Shoot.
0:01:52 > 0:01:55Favourite music tracks. Really?
0:01:55 > 0:01:57Ah. I'll e-mail you the link.
0:01:57 > 0:02:00It's a recent work-based study on the connection between music
0:02:00 > 0:02:02and people's emotional states.
0:02:02 > 0:02:04Apparently it can play a huge part in boosting productivity
0:02:04 > 0:02:07- and creating a positive atmosphere. - Right.- I'll leave it with you,
0:02:07 > 0:02:09but I think it'd be really interesting to focus on how those
0:02:09 > 0:02:12track choices relate to people in a work sense. What do you think?
0:02:12 > 0:02:15Just have some fun with it.
0:02:17 > 0:02:20Go with the flow.
0:02:20 > 0:02:23PHONE PLAYS Heroes by David Bowie
0:02:26 > 0:02:28MUSIC STOPS
0:02:28 > 0:02:30- Oh, I love that track! - Interesting choice.
0:02:30 > 0:02:32So why pick it?
0:02:32 > 0:02:35Because it reminds me of school discos and my first snog with...
0:02:35 > 0:02:38Uh-uh-uh! Enough information.
0:02:38 > 0:02:43Well, I was... I was a New Romantic. I still am at heart.
0:02:43 > 0:02:46OK. Well, so bringing us back to the more immediate past -
0:02:46 > 0:02:49the last year, say - how do you think things
0:02:49 > 0:02:51have been going, generally, at The Mill?
0:02:51 > 0:02:54- W-What, staff-wise? - Well, yes.
0:02:54 > 0:02:57How long have you got? There's been so much going on.
0:02:57 > 0:02:59Erm...well, there was Treehouse
0:02:59 > 0:03:03and...Mr Bellamy.
0:03:03 > 0:03:05Mrs Tembe leaving,
0:03:05 > 0:03:08Valerie and Barry's great romance,
0:03:08 > 0:03:11Ayesha and her mum - that was mayhem -
0:03:11 > 0:03:14and then, of course, Heston
0:03:14 > 0:03:18and the very attractive new midwife Ruhma.
0:03:18 > 0:03:20- No way!- Yes way.
0:03:20 > 0:03:21Since when?
0:03:21 > 0:03:26Oh, no. I mean, she's very lovely and I don't want to gossip.
0:03:26 > 0:03:27Karen.
0:03:27 > 0:03:29I was a bit of a matchmaker
0:03:29 > 0:03:33and I think that Heston is really quite smitten.
0:03:33 > 0:03:37You are kidding? Why has no-one kept me informed?
0:03:37 > 0:03:39Well, you have to blame Daniel.
0:03:39 > 0:03:41He's got to keep his finger on the pulse, hasn't he?
0:03:41 > 0:03:44Wow. Heston. I had no idea.
0:03:44 > 0:03:46Honestly, my appraisal was plain sailing.
0:03:46 > 0:03:48I really don't think there's anything sinister to it,
0:03:48 > 0:03:51it's just a little chat about how things are going.
0:03:51 > 0:03:55So naive. You have no idea what The Man is capable of.
0:03:55 > 0:03:58- The Man?- Yeah, The Man.
0:04:00 > 0:04:05Al has a somewhat negative view of Anthony's machinations.
0:04:05 > 0:04:08Oh. Right. But you're not worried though?
0:04:08 > 0:04:10No. But do I object?
0:04:10 > 0:04:13I'm a doctor, not a box-ticker.
0:04:13 > 0:04:15Chop chop, boys. It's backing up out there.
0:04:15 > 0:04:16Oh! I meant to say,
0:04:16 > 0:04:19top marks for your work on the mental health stall, Sid.
0:04:19 > 0:04:24Really inspired. Excellent idea. Had some fantastic feedback.
0:04:24 > 0:04:29Really? Great! Thanks! I'd better crack on.
0:04:33 > 0:04:37You know what? I do feel like I need a new challenge.
0:04:37 > 0:04:40It's... It's like I've got this... charge of energy
0:04:40 > 0:04:43and I don't know what to do with it.
0:04:43 > 0:04:48OK, ideas. What could you channel this energy in to?
0:04:48 > 0:04:50Haven't got a clue.
0:04:50 > 0:04:53Oh, come on, Karen. What occurs to you instinctively.
0:04:53 > 0:04:56Off the top of my head? Mountain-climbing!
0:04:56 > 0:04:59I-I just mean something that is more
0:04:59 > 0:05:01fittingly pertaining to your role at The Mill.
0:05:01 > 0:05:04I've always fancied a Brands Hatch day.
0:05:04 > 0:05:07Come on, Karen, this is about your future,
0:05:07 > 0:05:09not some Red Letter weekend.
0:05:09 > 0:05:12I know there's something I want, I just don't know what it is.
0:05:12 > 0:05:16OK, so...lots to think about.
0:05:16 > 0:05:19Definitely! I mean, I really think we're getting somewhere here!
0:05:19 > 0:05:22Well, maybe you should draw up a bucket-list
0:05:22 > 0:05:25and then decide where you're going to start - land, sea or air.
0:05:25 > 0:05:28I will! You've really got me going now. I'm buzzing!
0:05:28 > 0:05:31Glad to have helped.
0:05:31 > 0:05:34No, seriously! That was brilliant!
0:05:34 > 0:05:37- Karen?- Hm?
0:05:37 > 0:05:40Oh! Thank you! I'll see you later!
0:05:44 > 0:05:46It smells like Management Manure to me.
0:05:46 > 0:05:48You are, of course, entitled to your opinion.
0:05:48 > 0:05:51No doubt dreamt up by some bored think-tank of executives
0:05:51 > 0:05:54just trying to justify their over-inflated pay packets,
0:05:54 > 0:05:56so they can suppress the proletariat!
0:05:56 > 0:05:59The appraisal system is simply designed to be a useful tool
0:05:59 > 0:06:01for an open two-way dialogue.
0:06:01 > 0:06:04I don't need to be appraised to express my opinion,
0:06:04 > 0:06:06- thank you very kindly. - That is abundantly clear, Al.
0:06:06 > 0:06:08Ah! How's it going?
0:06:08 > 0:06:11- Great. We've hit the ground running. - Excellent.
0:06:11 > 0:06:14There was one thing I forgot to brief you on. I think it would be
0:06:14 > 0:06:16useful to have a grading system for each employee,
0:06:16 > 0:06:19just so we have some way of measuring individual outcomes.
0:06:19 > 0:06:23- Grading?- I am not a number, I am a free man!- Al...
0:06:23 > 0:06:25I'm disappointed in you, Carmichael, being used as a puppet
0:06:25 > 0:06:27by this regime and we need to cut those strings!
0:06:27 > 0:06:29Come on, Mr Sharrett!
0:06:30 > 0:06:34Just a simple star system - one to five, five being excellent.
0:06:34 > 0:06:37Here, this gives you a brief overview.
0:06:37 > 0:06:39I'm not sure this is a good idea.
0:06:39 > 0:06:44Just a simple yardstick to measure each individual outcome, because, otherwise, we...
0:06:44 > 0:06:48If you'd like to go through, I'll be with you in just a second.
0:06:48 > 0:06:50It's not about judging people.
0:06:50 > 0:06:54OK, how about I get everybody to grade themselves?
0:06:54 > 0:06:56Is that an idea?
0:06:57 > 0:07:01- Yes, that could work. - Great.
0:07:04 > 0:07:07- Sorry.- It's all right. Can we crack on though?
0:07:09 > 0:07:11Fine. Would you like to play your track?
0:07:11 > 0:07:12Really?
0:07:16 > 0:07:19PHONE PLAYS Single Ladies by Beyonce
0:07:26 > 0:07:28MUSIC STOPS
0:07:28 > 0:07:31Do you know what? I do love that track but THIS is killing it.
0:07:32 > 0:07:37Fine. So what was the significance of choosing it?
0:07:37 > 0:07:39It's just music that I like.
0:07:41 > 0:07:46Right. OK, well, let's just go for a quick review of how things
0:07:46 > 0:07:49are going at The Mill. I mean, generally?
0:07:49 > 0:07:52Everything seems to be running OK.
0:07:52 > 0:07:54And what about staff-wise?
0:07:54 > 0:07:56Well, if I've got a problem with anyone, they know about it.
0:07:56 > 0:07:58I say it how I see it.
0:07:58 > 0:08:00So you're happy working here?
0:08:00 > 0:08:04Yeah. Patients are mostly OK. We all get on. No complaints.
0:08:06 > 0:08:08Well, let's talk about the future, then.
0:08:08 > 0:08:11In terms of your aims and goals, where do you see yourself
0:08:11 > 0:08:13in, say, a year's time?
0:08:14 > 0:08:16Pretty much where I am now.
0:08:19 > 0:08:22Mind how you go, Mr Sharrett.
0:08:25 > 0:08:28Dr Carter, have you been in for the Ministry of Truth yet?
0:08:28 > 0:08:30Not yet. I think I'm in last.
0:08:30 > 0:08:33You know, our esteemed leader is going to grade us on the basis of this?
0:08:33 > 0:08:36- What?- Yeah, literally going to slap a seasoned professional
0:08:36 > 0:08:40such as yourself with a C- or a D+.
0:08:40 > 0:08:43- That's ridiculous.- I've a good mind to complain to the BMA.- Really?
0:08:43 > 0:08:44No. But I could.
0:08:44 > 0:08:49My appraisal was brilliant! It was inspirational!
0:08:49 > 0:08:51What on earth is going on in that room?
0:08:51 > 0:08:55I'm saying that if you show no desire to develop your career,
0:08:55 > 0:08:57then it's hard for us, as partners,
0:08:57 > 0:08:59to see the point in investing more in you.
0:08:59 > 0:09:01I'm not stocks or shares, I'm a nurse.
0:09:01 > 0:09:04I don't need investment, just my monthly pay.
0:09:04 > 0:09:06But you can't just stand still.
0:09:06 > 0:09:09Chance would be a fine thing given how many patients I have to deal with
0:09:09 > 0:09:12and the last thing I need is a lecture from a doctor saying how I should be doing more!
0:09:12 > 0:09:14- I didn't mean that. - No disrespect,
0:09:14 > 0:09:17but I don't tell you how you could do your job better.
0:09:17 > 0:09:21- OK, you've clearly misunderstood. - So have you. Anyway, I've got patients to see, if that's OK?
0:09:21 > 0:09:24- Could you just at least give yourself a grade?- A grade?
0:09:24 > 0:09:27Yes, on overall performance, out of five, five being "excelling in all areas."
0:09:27 > 0:09:30- No idea.- Just a rough estimate.
0:09:30 > 0:09:31What's...three?
0:09:31 > 0:09:35- "Meeting some, exceeding others." - That'll do. Put me down for that.
0:09:35 > 0:09:38And can you remind Al...
0:09:38 > 0:09:39that he's next?
0:09:39 > 0:09:42So what exactly did Zara ask you?
0:09:42 > 0:09:47Oh, you know, future plans, aims, ambitions, that sort of thing.
0:09:47 > 0:09:49Mr Clarke, would you like to go straight through?
0:09:49 > 0:09:51So she asked you to draw up a bucket list?
0:09:51 > 0:09:54- PHONE RINGS - How did you know that? - Been there, done that.
0:09:54 > 0:09:56Mill Health Centre. How can I help?
0:09:56 > 0:09:59Oh, how did she get on?
0:09:59 > 0:10:03- That bad?- Worse. Anyway, Zara says she's ready when you are.
0:10:03 > 0:10:06No can do, I'm in the middle of a patient prescription
0:10:06 > 0:10:09and my printer has just gone on the blink.
0:10:09 > 0:10:11Well, I could take yours now. Swap later.
0:10:11 > 0:10:13Perfect! Thanks, VP!
0:10:15 > 0:10:16Thank you.
0:10:19 > 0:10:22If you go so much as even an inch close to saying,
0:10:22 > 0:10:24"I told you so," Daniel. No?
0:10:24 > 0:10:27- No. Very wise. - KNOCK ON DOOR
0:10:27 > 0:10:32Look, I've got to go. Yep. Yes. OK. Bye.
0:10:32 > 0:10:35Al's busy with a patient, so I suggested that I squeeze...
0:10:35 > 0:10:39- Oh, erm...I wasn't expecting... - I've brought my favourite.
0:10:39 > 0:10:41OK. Hit me.
0:10:43 > 0:10:47PHONE PLAYS Power Of Love by Jennifer Rush
0:10:55 > 0:10:56MUSIC STOPS
0:10:56 > 0:10:58Normally it'd be Ricky Delaney,
0:10:58 > 0:11:00but she's got such an incredible voice.
0:11:00 > 0:11:04Mm. And why did you choose this?
0:11:04 > 0:11:07Well, the message, mainly. You know, all about following your heart.
0:11:07 > 0:11:10I think that's really the only way to be happy.
0:11:10 > 0:11:12And are you happy working at The Mill?
0:11:12 > 0:11:16- Oh, definitely. I really do feel at home here.- Good. Good.
0:11:16 > 0:11:19Which means a lot to me because of the cancer.
0:11:19 > 0:11:22- Right.- Which has drained me dry.
0:11:22 > 0:11:26And I don't just mean the treatment, which is exhausting enough,
0:11:26 > 0:11:30but...the weight of carrying it every day.
0:11:30 > 0:11:34It must be tough. Still, you've got the wedding to look forward to.
0:11:34 > 0:11:36Oh, that's one thing that's keeping me going.
0:11:36 > 0:11:39I want it to be absolutely perfect.
0:11:39 > 0:11:41I'm sure it will be.
0:11:41 > 0:11:44Obviously I had to accept the fact that there were limits in the budget.
0:11:44 > 0:11:46Well, you can be...creative.
0:11:46 > 0:11:49Exactly. And I drew the line at the dress.
0:11:49 > 0:11:51No compromise there.
0:11:51 > 0:11:54- Well, I'm sure it looks amazing. - Oh, it does.
0:11:54 > 0:11:56Oh, you should see it, Zara.
0:11:56 > 0:12:00Actually, we do really need to just get back to the appraisal.
0:12:00 > 0:12:03So where do you see yourself five years from now?
0:12:03 > 0:12:06Dead.
0:12:06 > 0:12:07I'm not being funny,
0:12:07 > 0:12:10it's just better to face these things, isn't it?
0:12:10 > 0:12:13I-I-I suppose.
0:12:13 > 0:12:16On a brighter note, there is something that I wanted to raise.
0:12:16 > 0:12:18OK.
0:12:18 > 0:12:22Something that I think would definitely help me to be more positive.
0:12:23 > 0:12:26I'd like a permanent contract here.
0:12:26 > 0:12:28Right.
0:12:28 > 0:12:31I mean, just to have that little bit of security, you know?
0:12:31 > 0:12:34OK, well, I will make sure that, as soon as possible,
0:12:34 > 0:12:37I speak to the partners about that.
0:12:37 > 0:12:39Oh, and Ayesha mentioned a star system.
0:12:39 > 0:12:41You can just put me down for five stars. Thanks.
0:12:41 > 0:12:44What was I talking...? Oh, yeah, the dress!
0:12:44 > 0:12:47Oh, yeah, you see, it's not exactly A-line,
0:12:47 > 0:12:51- but it has got a tight bit at the top, which sort of...- Wow.
0:12:51 > 0:12:54..flares out at the bottom, there.
0:12:56 > 0:12:58You should be in with Zara.
0:12:58 > 0:13:01They can't hit a moving target. No, thank you.
0:13:01 > 0:13:03You think you can dodge it?
0:13:03 > 0:13:08I dodged every school PE lesson from 1983 through to 1989.
0:13:08 > 0:13:10This is easy in comparison.
0:13:10 > 0:13:13- They can stick their appraisals right where... - SHE CLEARS THROAT
0:13:13 > 0:13:15Oh, hi, Anthony.
0:13:15 > 0:13:18Not making any exceptions, Al. You're in after Niamh.
0:13:20 > 0:13:22This ain't over.
0:13:23 > 0:13:26PHONE PLAYS One Day Like This by Elbow
0:13:31 > 0:13:35Got to love that song. It nearly always makes me cry.
0:13:35 > 0:13:37Please, don't.
0:13:37 > 0:13:40- MUSIC STOPS - It's a bit early and...
0:13:40 > 0:13:42I haven't had a drink, so you should be safe.
0:13:42 > 0:13:43Right.
0:13:43 > 0:13:47I'm going to ask you to think back over the last year.
0:13:47 > 0:13:51How do you think things have gone generally at the practice?
0:13:51 > 0:13:53Good.
0:13:53 > 0:13:56We have ups and downs, but, generally, we're a good team.
0:13:56 > 0:13:59So you feel like you're on top of everything now?
0:13:59 > 0:14:03Yeah. I'm really enjoying my work. Actually, I've never been happier.
0:14:03 > 0:14:06Great! So in terms of your future professional development,
0:14:06 > 0:14:08what is it that you hope to achieve?
0:14:08 > 0:14:11Well, it's going to sound kind of bad,
0:14:11 > 0:14:15but actually...I'm really comfortable where I am.
0:14:15 > 0:14:18Comfortable? Well, that's not a word you should be using.
0:14:18 > 0:14:21You do realise that the point of these appraisals is to
0:14:21 > 0:14:24identify areas that are in need for improvement.
0:14:24 > 0:14:29Well...yes, but I'm doing OK though, aren't I?
0:14:29 > 0:14:31OK is not good enough.
0:14:31 > 0:14:34You need more training or experience in a new discipline.
0:14:34 > 0:14:37A special area of interest. Paediatrics.
0:14:37 > 0:14:40- Geriatrics.- I don't know.
0:14:40 > 0:14:43It's taken me a while to settle into this job as it is.
0:14:43 > 0:14:46I'd rather wait until things are on an even keel.
0:14:47 > 0:14:49We all know how you struggled early on.
0:14:49 > 0:14:53You had to get over a real crisis of confidence.
0:14:53 > 0:14:54Yes, we've covered that, thank you.
0:14:54 > 0:14:57But that's no excuse to keep treading water professionally.
0:14:57 > 0:15:00- It feels like you are trying to undermine me.- No.
0:15:00 > 0:15:02I'm just trying to point out that you will go
0:15:02 > 0:15:05nowhere in your career, unless you pursue it.
0:15:05 > 0:15:07It's not that I'm not ambitious.
0:15:07 > 0:15:11Well, that's what it sounds like. Distinctly like you lack in focus.
0:15:12 > 0:15:15I thought this was going to be an informal chat?
0:15:15 > 0:15:16I'm just being honest.
0:15:16 > 0:15:19And you have to be honest with yourself too.
0:15:19 > 0:15:22You know what? I've got work to do.
0:15:22 > 0:15:23Yes, but, Niamh...
0:15:23 > 0:15:25we haven't finished...
0:15:28 > 0:15:31Oh! Are you OK?
0:15:31 > 0:15:33Do I look it?
0:15:33 > 0:15:36I take it the appraisal did not go well?
0:15:36 > 0:15:38- Appraisal? It was more like interrogation.- Oh, dear.
0:15:38 > 0:15:42- I'm in later, after Emma. - Good luck. You'll need it.
0:15:48 > 0:15:50- KNOCK ON DOOR - Come in.
0:15:53 > 0:15:55Haskey.
0:15:56 > 0:15:58Take a seat.
0:16:03 > 0:16:07Well, I don't know what I'm supposed to do with a blank form.
0:16:11 > 0:16:15OK. Not blank. You managed to write your name.
0:16:17 > 0:16:19I'll tell you what, let's start with your favourite track.
0:16:19 > 0:16:21It might put us both in a better mood.
0:16:24 > 0:16:27- PHONE:- # ..Fight the power... #
0:16:27 > 0:16:29Thank you.
0:16:29 > 0:16:33- Thank you, Al! - # ..Fight the power... #
0:16:33 > 0:16:36Moving on.
0:16:36 > 0:16:39What do you feel you've contributed to the practice
0:16:39 > 0:16:41over the last year and where do you think you're heading?
0:16:42 > 0:16:46- PHONE:- # We're on the road to nowhere... #
0:16:46 > 0:16:49- Funny(!) - # ..Come on inside... #
0:16:49 > 0:16:52Funny, Al(!)
0:16:52 > 0:16:55Perhaps you prefer that we talk about you.
0:16:55 > 0:16:58How do you currently feel about working here?
0:16:58 > 0:17:01# We've got to get out of this place...
0:17:01 > 0:17:05# If it's the last thing we ever do... #
0:17:05 > 0:17:07Please, just stop the music, Al!
0:17:07 > 0:17:09MUSIC STOPS
0:17:09 > 0:17:12This appraisal is supposed to be about helping you
0:17:12 > 0:17:15and if you refuse to even talk to me...
0:17:15 > 0:17:17Please, just say something.
0:17:17 > 0:17:22# I hate you so much right now I hate you so much right now... #
0:17:22 > 0:17:25Fine. You've made your point.
0:17:25 > 0:17:26Just go.
0:17:29 > 0:17:34# I'm free to do what I want any old... #
0:17:38 > 0:17:39- ON PHONE:- 'Hi.'
0:17:39 > 0:17:41Hi. How you doing? Almost finished?
0:17:41 > 0:17:42'You could say that.'
0:17:42 > 0:17:45I'm about ready to kill someone. Preferably Al.
0:17:45 > 0:17:46'Really?'
0:17:46 > 0:17:50- Don't say anything.- 'I won't.'
0:17:50 > 0:17:53Hey, how about a chicken Caesar?
0:17:53 > 0:17:55Daniel, I just don't care!
0:17:55 > 0:17:57'I'm just about to pass by your favourite patisserie.
0:17:57 > 0:17:59'Maybe I could pick you up one of your...?' PHONE BEEPS
0:17:59 > 0:18:01Zara?
0:18:03 > 0:18:05That's rude.
0:18:05 > 0:18:07- KNOCK ON DOOR - Come in.
0:18:07 > 0:18:12Oh, sorry. It's... It's been a hell of a day.
0:18:12 > 0:18:15- Do you mind if we don't take too long over this?- Suits me.
0:18:15 > 0:18:18It's just that I am snowed under with patients.
0:18:18 > 0:18:21Sorry, this has been a pain for everybody.
0:18:21 > 0:18:22Well, it's not your fault.
0:18:22 > 0:18:25So let's start with your track?
0:18:25 > 0:18:28I just didn't have time...
0:18:28 > 0:18:31You know what? Don't worry about it. It was Anthony's idea.
0:18:31 > 0:18:33Let's crack on with these instead, shall we?
0:18:33 > 0:18:37The first question is about a general overview of the last year.
0:18:37 > 0:18:40Let's fast forward.
0:18:41 > 0:18:45Understandable. This next one is about professional development.
0:18:45 > 0:18:48Well, there are three courses that I'm considering,
0:18:48 > 0:18:52although one of them may involve me taking some time off.
0:18:52 > 0:18:54I need to up my admin rate,
0:18:54 > 0:18:57I'm falling behind on the patient summaries,
0:18:57 > 0:19:00but apart from that, I'm pretty much on top of things.
0:19:00 > 0:19:04Er...biggest failing, stats.
0:19:04 > 0:19:07- I hate doing them.- Don't we all?
0:19:07 > 0:19:10But, you know, I'm aiming to get better
0:19:10 > 0:19:13- and last month was quicker, so... - Excellent.
0:19:13 > 0:19:19And how are you feeling...things are going on a personal level?
0:19:19 > 0:19:23Is this you subtly steering me to talk about Howard?
0:19:23 > 0:19:28No steering, but obviously if you want to talk about...
0:19:28 > 0:19:30Absolutely not.
0:19:30 > 0:19:34I'm coping. That's all.
0:19:34 > 0:19:39- Pretty emphatic. - That's how I feel about it.
0:19:39 > 0:19:46Grieving...can be a long and difficult process.
0:19:46 > 0:19:49Maybe there are issues which you think you've dealt with
0:19:49 > 0:19:53- and then they resurface later? - What issues?
0:19:53 > 0:19:57I mean, specifically, I don't know.
0:19:57 > 0:20:02Just...the loss of someone so close is so difficult.
0:20:02 > 0:20:04You've had a very tough time.
0:20:04 > 0:20:11Not as tough as for some and you just keep going, don't you? So...
0:20:11 > 0:20:14Absolutely and you have done brilliantly.
0:20:14 > 0:20:19I don't know how you've managed it. Just the volume of your workload,
0:20:19 > 0:20:24taking time out to look after Ayesha and not to mention your responsibilities as a landlady.
0:20:24 > 0:20:27And the miscarriage on top of the loss of Howard...
0:20:27 > 0:20:28What?
0:20:31 > 0:20:32Sorry.
0:20:32 > 0:20:34Should I not have said?
0:20:35 > 0:20:37How do you know?
0:20:37 > 0:20:40Well, Daniel told me.
0:20:40 > 0:20:41Daniel?
0:20:43 > 0:20:44Right.
0:20:47 > 0:20:48Yes, of course.
0:20:50 > 0:20:55Well, it's good to know that my most intimate details are being
0:20:55 > 0:20:57bandied around the surgery.
0:20:57 > 0:21:00Now, look, don't be so paranoid.
0:21:00 > 0:21:03I'm just trying to offer you a supportive...
0:21:03 > 0:21:08- Supportive?! You?! Is that a joke! - This is just like you, Emma!
0:21:08 > 0:21:10You're always flying off the handle!
0:21:10 > 0:21:13Where, of course, you take criticism so perfectly, I suppose!
0:21:13 > 0:21:17- OK, this is going nowhere. - Why am I not surprised?!
0:21:17 > 0:21:21You asking me about my personal life, well, that's just another
0:21:21 > 0:21:24little task, isn't it, to tick off your list!
0:21:24 > 0:21:27Well, real life isn't that straightforward - thank God!
0:21:27 > 0:21:32It is sad and it is messy and that is what makes it worthwhile,
0:21:32 > 0:21:34but you will never understand that.
0:21:34 > 0:21:37I don't know why I'm wasting my breath!
0:21:37 > 0:21:42You have absolutely no natural compassion for me or anybody else!
0:21:45 > 0:21:46DOOR SLAMS
0:21:48 > 0:21:49SHE SIGHS
0:21:57 > 0:21:59So, how did go?
0:21:59 > 0:22:01The earth moved, darling. How was it for you?
0:22:01 > 0:22:03Come on, you must have got something from it?
0:22:03 > 0:22:07Absolutely. I feel all...empowered.
0:22:07 > 0:22:11Excellent. So you've changed your opinion of the appraisal process?
0:22:11 > 0:22:14Yes, I'm actually looking forward to the next one.
0:22:14 > 0:22:17What did you think of my addition, the music bit?
0:22:17 > 0:22:19The music was my favourite part.
0:22:19 > 0:22:25# I'm free to do what I want Any old time. #
0:22:27 > 0:22:34CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS
0:22:34 > 0:22:39Thank you. That was spiritually replenishing.
0:22:39 > 0:22:42Well, that's answers my first question.
0:22:42 > 0:22:46So the next question is a general overview of the past year.
0:22:46 > 0:22:48Do we have to? I've made notes.
0:22:48 > 0:22:50Yes, you have. Copious ones.
0:22:50 > 0:22:53OK, let's skip to the next bit, personal development.
0:22:53 > 0:22:57How are you feeling about your role here at The Mill?
0:22:57 > 0:22:59I'm not sure my emotional state is anyone's business.
0:22:59 > 0:23:02It's important to talking about these things.
0:23:02 > 0:23:04I don't really want to share that kind of information.
0:23:04 > 0:23:07Well, the whole point of this appraisal process is that
0:23:07 > 0:23:11it's about your opinions. Your feelings, they matter.
0:23:11 > 0:23:14Do they? Do they really?
0:23:14 > 0:23:17Of course. This is all strictly in confidence, Heston.
0:23:17 > 0:23:19I don't think anyone would bother listening
0:23:19 > 0:23:21if they were broadcast all over Letherbridge!
0:23:21 > 0:23:25So you feel like no-one is listening to you?
0:23:25 > 0:23:27You have communication issues.
0:23:27 > 0:23:32I have been a doctor long enough to know when I'm being treated
0:23:32 > 0:23:36with respect and when I'm being treated like a junior lackey.
0:23:36 > 0:23:41I am a highly effective, senior member of staff.
0:23:41 > 0:23:44- Yes, of course...- No, no, no, I'm resolving our communication issues.
0:23:44 > 0:23:47I am fed up with the lack of recognition. OK...
0:23:47 > 0:23:51- If I pull more than my weight it is taken for granted!- Heston...
0:23:51 > 0:23:54If I come up with an initiative, credit is given to someone else!
0:23:54 > 0:23:57Hell is empty and all the devils are here!
0:24:00 > 0:24:01Heston.
0:24:10 > 0:24:12KNOCK ON DOOR
0:24:12 > 0:24:15- Heston...- Ta-da!
0:24:17 > 0:24:21Erm...I just saw Heston in the corridor.
0:24:21 > 0:24:24Am I right in saying that things haven't gone exactly to plan?
0:24:24 > 0:24:26Understatement of the year.
0:24:26 > 0:24:30Well, you are in luck, because there is some good news.
0:24:30 > 0:24:34I passed by your favourite patisserie, as a backup...
0:24:34 > 0:24:35Any wine?
0:24:35 > 0:24:37No.
0:24:40 > 0:24:43Daniel, everyone hates me.
0:24:43 > 0:24:47- I don't.- Oh, that makes it all right then.
0:24:49 > 0:24:51I made a total hash of this.
0:24:51 > 0:24:54I bet you didn't. And I'll prove it.
0:24:54 > 0:24:55Do me.
0:24:55 > 0:24:57Do you?
0:24:57 > 0:25:00No, appraise me.
0:25:00 > 0:25:03- Oh, Daniel! - All right, fine. I'll do you.
0:25:03 > 0:25:04Er...
0:25:04 > 0:25:09Oops. That... No. Better. The royal pen.
0:25:09 > 0:25:15OK, er...how have I contributed to the practice?
0:25:15 > 0:25:19Blah, blah, blah. Future development. Ah!
0:25:19 > 0:25:21Where do you see yourself later this evening?
0:25:21 > 0:25:23May I help you fill this one out?
0:25:23 > 0:25:28OK, I see myself at home in my bath,
0:25:28 > 0:25:35with my extraordinarily good-looking partner,
0:25:35 > 0:25:38with a glass of white wine, chilled.
0:25:40 > 0:25:42Specific aims and ambitions. Right.
0:25:42 > 0:25:45That's not... That's not easy... Ah, it is easy.
0:25:45 > 0:25:50I want to get to bed super early, because I want to...
0:25:50 > 0:25:53HE MUTTERS
0:25:57 > 0:25:59- Daniel! - SHE LAUGHS
0:25:59 > 0:26:05And I want to listen to my favourite track in the world, which is...
0:26:05 > 0:26:08Etta James, because...
0:26:08 > 0:26:11she sings like she just...
0:26:11 > 0:26:13BOTH: ..doesn't care.
0:26:24 > 0:26:28# I don't want you to be no slave
0:26:28 > 0:26:33# I don't want you to work all day
0:26:33 > 0:26:37# But I want you to be true
0:26:37 > 0:26:42# And I just wanna make love to you
0:26:42 > 0:26:47# Love to you ooh-ooh
0:26:47 > 0:26:49# Love to you... #
0:26:52 > 0:26:56Well done, Dr Carmichael. Five stars.
0:27:05 > 0:27:08Would you do me the honour of being my wife?
0:27:08 > 0:27:10No, wait.
0:27:10 > 0:27:13- But it's my big night, I'm going to go bold.- Good for you.
0:27:13 > 0:27:17- Sid.- Zach. How you doing?
0:27:17 > 0:27:19Let's just have a nice drink, eh?
0:27:19 > 0:27:21He's got off lightly.
0:27:21 > 0:27:23You've got to admit, this is the most boring stag ever.
0:27:23 > 0:27:27- To Valerie.- Cheers! - To Valerie!- ALL:- Valerie!