0:00:28 > 0:00:31QUIET PIANO MUSIC PLAYS
0:00:33 > 0:00:36Don't worry about anyone else.
0:00:36 > 0:00:40Focus on you, what you are doing.
0:00:40 > 0:00:43Do not be distracted by anyone.
0:00:46 > 0:00:50UPTEMPO BRASS MUSIC PLAYS
0:00:55 > 0:00:57- Morning.- Hi. Good morning.
0:01:04 > 0:01:05Oh!
0:01:09 > 0:01:12MUSIC CONTINUES
0:01:23 > 0:01:26HE IMPERSONATES BRASS INSTRUMENT
0:01:28 > 0:01:30OK, "prickle."
0:01:31 > 0:01:33- Prickle, Joe, prickle!- No.
0:01:33 > 0:01:36Look, come on, there's only five words left. Prickle.
0:01:38 > 0:01:42It's your spelling test tomorrow, Joe. You need to concentrate.
0:01:45 > 0:01:49Look, I'm coming to your school today to be a reading auntie
0:01:49 > 0:01:52just so I can spend more time with you.
0:01:52 > 0:01:53Now, that's going to be nice, isn't it?
0:01:53 > 0:01:55No!
0:01:55 > 0:01:57Joe! OK, that is it.
0:01:57 > 0:02:00You're going to have to do your spellings tonight which means you can't go to Beavers.
0:02:00 > 0:02:03- No!- Joe!
0:02:03 > 0:02:06You need to learn that you have to work at some things in life.
0:02:08 > 0:02:12Just go and get your coat otherwise we're going to be late.
0:02:18 > 0:02:22What are you doing there? I told you to get in the car.
0:02:24 > 0:02:26How come you're reading that again?
0:02:26 > 0:02:29There are plenty of other books to be reading other than Harry Potter.
0:02:29 > 0:02:30Useful things.
0:02:33 > 0:02:34Ignore me, then.
0:02:36 > 0:02:37Get in the car.
0:02:45 > 0:02:48Right. Let's use the time...
0:02:48 > 0:02:51An embedded relative clause?
0:02:51 > 0:02:54A subjunctive clause in the middle of a sentence
0:02:54 > 0:02:56that tells you more about the main clause.
0:02:56 > 0:02:59- A frontal abverbial? - A lead-in that acts as an adverb.
0:02:59 > 0:03:02Good. A subjunctive mood?
0:03:03 > 0:03:08- A verb form used to express a wish, a suggestion or a command.- Hm.
0:03:14 > 0:03:16You've just got to stop sulking, Joe.
0:03:16 > 0:03:18I'm not going to change my mind.
0:03:18 > 0:03:21You're not going to Beavers, and that is the end of it.
0:03:21 > 0:03:22Morning, Mrs Williams.
0:03:22 > 0:03:25Good morning. Oh, dear, someone doesn't look very happy.
0:03:25 > 0:03:29Someone is having one of those days. Come on, darling.
0:03:31 > 0:03:33We are going to have a nice time.
0:03:37 > 0:03:40Are you all right, darling?
0:03:40 > 0:03:43Some people have no idea what's going on around them.
0:03:49 > 0:03:52Come on, Joe. Come with me.
0:03:58 > 0:04:00You can do this.
0:04:07 > 0:04:08Good luck, baby.
0:04:11 > 0:04:13You nearly hit us!
0:04:13 > 0:04:15- I'm sorry?- Just now.
0:04:15 > 0:04:18- At the crossing. - Oh, yes. I apologised.
0:04:18 > 0:04:22- You waved from the window. That's hardly an apology.- OK.
0:04:22 > 0:04:25- I'm sorry.- Well, you don't seem it.
0:04:25 > 0:04:28Not content with nearly killing us, you're now parked on yellow lines.
0:04:28 > 0:04:30Do you have any idea how dangerous that is?
0:04:30 > 0:04:33I'm not parked anywhere!
0:04:33 > 0:04:34I'm dropping off my daughter
0:04:34 > 0:04:36because I don't want her to be late for her mock SATS,
0:04:36 > 0:04:38so mind your own business!
0:04:38 > 0:04:40Can you not shout, please, in front of my son?!
0:04:40 > 0:04:41Don't lecture me, then.
0:04:41 > 0:04:44I am merely saying that you should have more consideration
0:04:44 > 0:04:46for other people's children.
0:04:46 > 0:04:48Ha! You're the last person I'd take advice from
0:04:48 > 0:04:51about being considerate to other people's children.
0:04:51 > 0:04:53What's that supposed to mean?
0:04:53 > 0:04:55It means I know who you are.
0:04:55 > 0:04:58You're that saucy doctor who decided to have it off
0:04:58 > 0:05:01with her husband next to a kids' playground.
0:05:01 > 0:05:05Very responsible parenting, I don't think.
0:05:05 > 0:05:07That has nothing to do with this.
0:05:07 > 0:05:09It has everything to do with it,
0:05:09 > 0:05:12if you think you can lecture me on how to behave around children.
0:05:12 > 0:05:16It's why I got elected school governor and you didn't.
0:05:16 > 0:05:20So perhaps you should learn to keep your legs and your trap shut
0:05:20 > 0:05:22before dishing out advice.
0:05:31 > 0:05:34Mrs Tembe, have we got a new receptionist?
0:05:34 > 0:05:38- Yes, she's temporary...- Oh. - ..just so I can sort this out.
0:05:38 > 0:05:41Are you still covering all bases, cos you must be exhausted?
0:05:41 > 0:05:44Well, needs must until Miss Pitman and Mrs Hollins return.
0:05:44 > 0:05:47She's a very good receptionist, but she does need support.
0:05:47 > 0:05:49Well, don't kill yourself.
0:05:49 > 0:05:51Oh! I got this for Jimmi.
0:05:53 > 0:05:56Oh, I'm sure he's going to love that, thank you.
0:05:56 > 0:05:59First Karen and Valerie, now Jimmi.
0:05:59 > 0:06:03Thank goodness you and I are on top form otherwise the Mill would come to a standstill.
0:06:10 > 0:06:16- Oh, Dr Carmichael, what are you doing here?- I'm reading with 1G.
0:06:16 > 0:06:19Of course you are. Our new reading auntie.
0:06:19 > 0:06:22- How's it going? Are you enjoying yourself?- I am, actually.
0:06:22 > 0:06:25It's quite relaxing in a funny sort of way.
0:06:25 > 0:06:26I know exactly what you mean.
0:06:26 > 0:06:30I escape my office and do it as often as I can. Best bit of my week.
0:06:30 > 0:06:34But don't tell anyone! Well, I'm glad you're enjoying it, too.
0:06:34 > 0:06:38We appreciate it, and I know the children do, too. Thank you.
0:06:38 > 0:06:39You are so welcome.
0:06:49 > 0:06:52There is a smell emanating from this room.
0:06:52 > 0:06:54I can only describe it like sugared puke.
0:06:54 > 0:06:57Yeah? Must be something the cleaner's using.
0:06:57 > 0:07:02Cleaner! If she tries to use it in my room there will be trouble.
0:07:03 > 0:07:06What do you want, Al, cos I'm working?
0:07:06 > 0:07:11All work and no play made Jack Nicholson attack Scatman Crothers with an axe.
0:07:11 > 0:07:14But I don't come bearing an axe. I come bearing a treat.
0:07:14 > 0:07:15What are you going on about?
0:07:15 > 0:07:18PRETENDS TO PLAY INSTRUMENT
0:07:18 > 0:07:20What was that?
0:07:20 > 0:07:22- The tickets! I got them. - What tickets? What tickets?
0:07:22 > 0:07:25For the Beer and Brass Fest, remember?
0:07:25 > 0:07:27I talked about booking them. They came available this morning.
0:07:27 > 0:07:29I booked us two. You play the trumpet,
0:07:29 > 0:07:31I'll be the drums. Five, six, seven, eight.
0:07:33 > 0:07:37Jimmi, why am I sensing a distinct lack of enthusiasm?
0:07:37 > 0:07:39- Cos I can't go.- What do you mean, you can't go?
0:07:39 > 0:07:42- I'm going away.- What do you mean, you're going away?
0:07:42 > 0:07:44I mean I'm going away!
0:07:48 > 0:07:53For your second paper, you have 45 minutes to answer 49 questions.
0:07:53 > 0:07:56No talking. If you need to go to the toilet, you put your hand up.
0:07:56 > 0:08:00The time is starting now so you may turn over your question papers.
0:08:02 > 0:08:05'Focus on you, what you are doing.
0:08:06 > 0:08:08'Do not be distracted by anyone.
0:08:08 > 0:08:11'Focus...focus... What you are doing.
0:08:11 > 0:08:14'Distracted... Focus... Focus... Focus...'
0:08:21 > 0:08:24So let's re-cap.
0:08:24 > 0:08:28Thailand, six weeks...
0:08:30 > 0:08:33..a Buddhist retreat.
0:08:33 > 0:08:34Yeah.
0:08:34 > 0:08:38Nah. No, this is some elaborate gag
0:08:38 > 0:08:40because of how I was with your Vita course.
0:08:40 > 0:08:41No, you're not going.
0:08:41 > 0:08:44You're going to come to the Beer and Brass Festival with me.
0:08:44 > 0:08:48Jimmi, there is no way you're going to swap an all-encompassing God
0:08:48 > 0:08:50with a philosophical Buddha.
0:08:50 > 0:08:54Nope. Dude, you're coming to the festival. It's a joke, isn't it?
0:08:54 > 0:08:56You're serious?
0:08:58 > 0:08:59When?
0:09:00 > 0:09:05- Today.- As in yesterday's tomorrow today?
0:09:05 > 0:09:06Huh.
0:09:08 > 0:09:11What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor?
0:09:12 > 0:09:14Make me one with everything.
0:09:21 > 0:09:25So this is actually quite a difficult word. Rumbustious. But you can...
0:09:25 > 0:09:27Sorry to disturb you, Dr Carmichael. We need your assistance.
0:09:27 > 0:09:29It's urgent.
0:10:14 > 0:10:16That's mine.
0:10:16 > 0:10:19It is.
0:10:19 > 0:10:20How are you feeling?
0:10:20 > 0:10:22Tired.
0:10:22 > 0:10:24Where am I?
0:10:24 > 0:10:25You're in the sickbay at school.
0:10:25 > 0:10:28You're safe and your mum's on her way in.
0:10:28 > 0:10:30Why am I here?
0:10:30 > 0:10:32You don't remember?
0:10:32 > 0:10:34No.
0:10:34 > 0:10:36Nothing at all?
0:10:37 > 0:10:38I...
0:10:38 > 0:10:41Hey, look, it doesn't matter.
0:10:41 > 0:10:43It's perfectly normal not to remember things sometimes.
0:10:43 > 0:10:46You passed out in the exam hall.
0:10:46 > 0:10:48- I fainted?- Sort of.
0:10:51 > 0:10:54You're the woman Mummy nearly ran into.
0:10:54 > 0:10:57I am, yes. I'm also a doctor,
0:10:57 > 0:11:00and Mrs O'Hare asked me to check you over, which I did,
0:11:00 > 0:11:04and you're fine. Look, I have my whole bag of tricks in the car.
0:11:05 > 0:11:09- You know, I have never read this. - I have. Six times.
0:11:09 > 0:11:14- Six times? Wow. It must be good. - It used to be my favourite.
0:11:14 > 0:11:18- Used to?- I haven't read it for ages.
0:11:18 > 0:11:21But you're reading it now?
0:11:21 > 0:11:23No, I just like having it with me.
0:11:23 > 0:11:26- Why?- It makes me feel safe.
0:11:28 > 0:11:30Did I finish my grammar and spelling exam?
0:11:30 > 0:11:33I don't know, but it doesn't matter, though.
0:11:33 > 0:11:37Of course it does! It's the only thing that does matter.
0:11:37 > 0:11:40You have no idea what it's like to be 11 years old.
0:11:41 > 0:11:43You're right, I don't.
0:11:44 > 0:11:47Why don't you tell me all about it?
0:11:55 > 0:11:56Hard at it, Dr Vere?
0:12:04 > 0:12:08- Are you all right? - Yeah, I'm brilliant.
0:12:09 > 0:12:14- Thank you, Mrs Tembe. - What was that for?
0:12:14 > 0:12:15For this.
0:12:15 > 0:12:18It's the same edition my dad used to read to me when I was a kid.
0:12:18 > 0:12:20Still got the same pictures and everything. Look.
0:12:20 > 0:12:24It is lovely. That is a classic story.
0:12:24 > 0:12:28Yeah, it is. I used to love these adventures when I was small.
0:12:28 > 0:12:31- I really wanted to be a Lost Boy. - Didn't we all?
0:12:31 > 0:12:33I didn't realise how well-written it was back then.
0:12:33 > 0:12:35Listen to this.
0:12:35 > 0:12:38"All children, except one, grow up.
0:12:38 > 0:12:41"They soon know that they will grow up, and the way Wendy knew was this.
0:12:41 > 0:12:44"One day when she was two years old she was playing in a garden,
0:12:44 > 0:12:47"and she plucked another flower and ran with it to her mother.
0:12:47 > 0:12:50"I suppose she must have looked rather delightful,
0:12:50 > 0:12:53"for Mrs Darling put her hand to her heart and cried,
0:12:53 > 0:12:56"'Oh, why can't you remain like this for ever!'
0:12:56 > 0:12:59"This was all that passed between them on the subject,
0:12:59 > 0:13:02"but henceforth Wendy knew that she must grow up.
0:13:02 > 0:13:05"You always know after you are two.
0:13:05 > 0:13:07"Two is the beginning of the end."
0:13:07 > 0:13:08Mm.
0:13:09 > 0:13:13- That is very beautiful. - Yeah, it is, isn't it?
0:13:15 > 0:13:17I used to love the summer holidays.
0:13:17 > 0:13:20We'd go camping in France and do nothing but swim and read
0:13:20 > 0:13:25and eat cheese and bread. But that was before...
0:13:25 > 0:13:26Before...what?
0:13:29 > 0:13:32- Did you go camping last summer? - No. I had to revise.
0:13:32 > 0:13:35- For what?- My 11-plus.
0:13:35 > 0:13:38- What? All summer?- Most of it.
0:13:38 > 0:13:40Sounds a bit harsh.
0:13:40 > 0:13:43How did you get on?
0:13:43 > 0:13:45I failed.
0:13:45 > 0:13:47And how do you feel about that?
0:13:47 > 0:13:48I let Mum down.
0:13:48 > 0:13:50It's going to be all right.
0:13:50 > 0:13:53I'm going to take the test again in a couple of years.
0:13:53 > 0:13:56- Can you do that? - At 13. I've got a tutor
0:13:56 > 0:14:00and go to Saturday morning homework club. I'm working really hard.
0:14:00 > 0:14:02It sounds very busy.
0:14:02 > 0:14:05I had to give up netball and swimming, but it's worth it.
0:14:05 > 0:14:07I'm going to pass all my SATS, too.
0:14:07 > 0:14:10Everyone's going to going to see that I really deserve to go to the grammar school.
0:14:12 > 0:14:14It was lovely to see you again, Mrs Clarke.
0:14:14 > 0:14:18- Hopefully, I won't have to see you again so soon.- Thank you.
0:14:18 > 0:14:20SHE MUTTERS
0:14:20 > 0:14:25- Free fruit? Don't mind if I do.- No, put that back.
0:14:25 > 0:14:29- That is for my lunch. - Sorry, Mrs Tembe. Here you are.- W...
0:14:32 > 0:14:33What's up with you?
0:14:33 > 0:14:34Nothing.
0:14:34 > 0:14:37I did see you taking those painkillers in the staffroom.
0:14:37 > 0:14:40- Come on - what have you done to yourself?- It is nothing.
0:14:42 > 0:14:47I pulled something while I was lifting a box of books, that is all.
0:14:49 > 0:14:50Well, it doesn't look like nothing.
0:14:50 > 0:14:53With your history of back problems, you need to be careful, Mrs Tembe.
0:14:53 > 0:14:56You know that. Why don't you ring your doctor and book an appointment?
0:14:56 > 0:15:00Dr Vere, I am far too busy looking after the welfare of the patients,
0:15:00 > 0:15:02and I certainly do not have the time to become a patient myself.
0:15:02 > 0:15:04That's not a very sensible attitude, is it?
0:15:04 > 0:15:06Yes, well, it is what it is.
0:15:09 > 0:15:11What do you think you are doing?
0:15:11 > 0:15:14- I'm thinking of eating it, Mrs Tembe.- Well, that is mine.
0:15:14 > 0:15:16I don't want to eat it.
0:15:16 > 0:15:19But I will unless you ring your doctor and go and get checked out.
0:15:19 > 0:15:23Dr Vere, put the apple back on the counter!
0:15:23 > 0:15:25It smells good, Mrs Tembe.
0:15:25 > 0:15:27Right, fine. Fine. Eat it.
0:15:28 > 0:15:31You can't ignore your body, Mrs Tembe.
0:15:31 > 0:15:33Please, just ring your doctor.
0:15:35 > 0:15:37All right. All right.
0:15:38 > 0:15:41- You see?- Thank you.
0:15:44 > 0:15:46It is ringing.
0:15:51 > 0:15:55It sounds brilliant, the way that you've described it to me.
0:15:55 > 0:15:58I predict that this Harry Potter fellow is going to be a big success.
0:15:58 > 0:16:02She's just through here, Mrs Jones. Look who I found.
0:16:02 > 0:16:03Oh, baby!
0:16:03 > 0:16:05I'm all right, Mummy.
0:16:05 > 0:16:07What happened?
0:16:07 > 0:16:11I don't know. I felt funny and when I woke up Zara was here.
0:16:11 > 0:16:14Was she? And what was she doing here?
0:16:14 > 0:16:17Dr Carmichael happened to be in the infant school.
0:16:17 > 0:16:21She's been very kind and helped us with Emily. Do you know each other?
0:16:21 > 0:16:23We met this morning.
0:16:23 > 0:16:25Oh, that's handy.
0:16:25 > 0:16:26Mrs Jones is one of our governors.
0:16:26 > 0:16:28Yes. She informed me.
0:16:30 > 0:16:33Emily has been very brave, haven't you?
0:16:34 > 0:16:37- Do you know what happened to her? - She had a convulsion.
0:16:37 > 0:16:42Convulsions? Like a fit? An epileptic fit?
0:16:42 > 0:16:45It could be, but not necessarily.
0:16:45 > 0:16:47I wouldn't jump to any conclusions.
0:16:47 > 0:16:48It's impossible to tell without tests.
0:16:48 > 0:16:51But she's all right now? She's not in any immediate danger, is she?
0:16:51 > 0:16:56No, I checked her over and she does seem to be fine.
0:16:56 > 0:16:58Oh. That's good news.
0:17:00 > 0:17:02So, I will leave you guys to it.
0:17:02 > 0:17:05You need to make an appointment for her to see her GP
0:17:05 > 0:17:09and make a referral to see a paediatrician as soon as possible.
0:17:10 > 0:17:12Thank you, Doctor.
0:17:13 > 0:17:14You're welcome.
0:17:18 > 0:17:21How far did Emily get through her grammar and spelling test?
0:17:21 > 0:17:25- Oh, she didn't even start. - Oh. That's a shame.
0:17:25 > 0:17:27Is there any chance she could re-sit it this afternoon?
0:17:27 > 0:17:31Mrs Jones, I think Emily's been through enough for today...
0:17:31 > 0:17:34But she's in no immediate danger. You heard.
0:17:34 > 0:17:35That's right, isn't it?
0:17:35 > 0:17:37I really would not advise...
0:17:37 > 0:17:39It's just that she's been working so hard.
0:17:39 > 0:17:43It would be a great blow if she was unable to get a mark.
0:17:46 > 0:17:48You'd like to re-sit the test, wouldn't you, darling?
0:17:48 > 0:17:50I...
0:17:51 > 0:17:55Mrs Jones, could I have a word, outside?
0:17:55 > 0:17:57Hm.
0:18:03 > 0:18:05- Thanks, Mrs Harold. See you. - Yeah, bye, Mrs Harold. Take care.
0:18:05 > 0:18:07- Are you having some kind of midlife crisis?- No.
0:18:07 > 0:18:11- Has something happened that I don't know about?- Like what?
0:18:11 > 0:18:14I don't know. Something awful happened. Earth-shattering.
0:18:14 > 0:18:16Not that I'm aware of, no.
0:18:16 > 0:18:20Then where, oh where, has Buddhism come from?
0:18:20 > 0:18:21You!
0:18:22 > 0:18:27- From me?!- Yeah, you! You found a book in Mrs Tembe's library.
0:18:27 > 0:18:30Buddhism: The Basic Tenets. I read it. I liked it.
0:18:30 > 0:18:32I read another one, I liked that.
0:18:32 > 0:18:33I started practising.
0:18:33 > 0:18:36I totally remember that now. I'm an idiot.
0:18:36 > 0:18:38Do you know what? You're an idiot, too.
0:18:38 > 0:18:41Because Buddhism is just another sham religion like your Vita course.
0:18:41 > 0:18:43Ah, well, it's more philosophy than religion.
0:18:43 > 0:18:45Right, and how much is this philosophy costing you?
0:18:45 > 0:18:48It's not about the money, is it? It's about looking after myself.
0:18:48 > 0:18:50That's got to be a good thing.
0:18:50 > 0:18:51Jimmi, you don't need a security blanket!
0:18:51 > 0:18:55It's not a security blanket. It's an opportunity to discover things about myself.
0:18:55 > 0:18:57There's one thing that you need to discover about yourself
0:18:57 > 0:19:00and listen closely cos I'll save you an absolute fortune.
0:19:00 > 0:19:04You are insignificant. Me, I am insignificant.
0:19:04 > 0:19:06In the grand cosmic scale of things,
0:19:06 > 0:19:08me and you are indistinguishable from a leaf.
0:19:09 > 0:19:11Hm. That sounds pretty Buddhist to me.
0:19:14 > 0:19:18Emily seems postictal which means that she is groggy and confused.
0:19:18 > 0:19:22- She is in no condition to take an exam today.- I agree.
0:19:22 > 0:19:25If Emily wants to re-sit the test, then she can do it another day.
0:19:25 > 0:19:27- But she's been working so hard. - Give her a break!
0:19:27 > 0:19:29It's too much stress.
0:19:29 > 0:19:31She has just been through a traumatic experience.
0:19:31 > 0:19:34She's my daughter! I think I know her better than you.
0:19:34 > 0:19:39If she can sit up in bed and read Harry Potter, then she can sit a 45-minute test.
0:19:39 > 0:19:42In my medical opinion...
0:19:42 > 0:19:46At no point have I asked you for your opinion, medical or otherwise.
0:19:46 > 0:19:49- So please just back off!- Mrs Jones!
0:19:49 > 0:19:52I think we all need to calm down here, don't you? Please!
0:19:55 > 0:19:57I'm sorry.
0:19:57 > 0:19:59I didn't...
0:19:59 > 0:20:01It's OK.
0:20:01 > 0:20:06I just have Emily's wellbeing at the forefront of my mind.
0:20:06 > 0:20:08So do I.
0:20:11 > 0:20:14Emily, we're talking. We'll be through in a minute.
0:20:14 > 0:20:16Go and sit back down.
0:20:16 > 0:20:18Emily, please!
0:20:18 > 0:20:20Just lie back down on the bed.
0:20:21 > 0:20:22She's fitting.
0:20:24 > 0:20:25I don't need you to worry about me.
0:20:25 > 0:20:27Of course I'm going to worry about you!
0:20:27 > 0:20:32You're going all the way round the world to have people fiddle with your head.
0:20:32 > 0:20:35What if that brings on depression? What if it brings on OCD?
0:20:35 > 0:20:38- It's not going to, is it? - How do you know?- It's not going to!
0:20:38 > 0:20:42There's no evidence whatsoever that Buddhism brings on depression.
0:20:42 > 0:20:44That we know of.
0:20:44 > 0:20:47Al, and as far as OCD's concerned, it calms you down.
0:20:47 > 0:20:49Why can't you be my mate and support me?
0:20:49 > 0:20:52I am being your mate! I don't understand why you're running away.
0:20:52 > 0:20:53I'm not running aw...
0:20:53 > 0:20:55Do you know what, I don't need this.
0:20:55 > 0:20:59I don't need you in my room being all negative and undermining me.
0:20:59 > 0:21:01Just get out my office.
0:21:08 > 0:21:10DOOR SLAMS
0:21:20 > 0:21:22Did I do this to her?
0:21:22 > 0:21:24What do you mean?
0:21:27 > 0:21:30- You said that it could have happened because of stress.- Could.
0:21:30 > 0:21:32Not definitely.
0:21:32 > 0:21:37There are many other physical causes that need to be explored first.
0:21:37 > 0:21:39You cannot blame yourself.
0:21:43 > 0:21:48I threw my husband out a year ago - he was sleeping with his PA.
0:21:49 > 0:21:55Money's so tight. And I've become a...grumpy cow.
0:21:57 > 0:22:00Well, we can all be prone to that sometimes.
0:22:00 > 0:22:03When Emily failed her 11-plus, it was a blow.
0:22:04 > 0:22:08It was the only way I could afford to get her into a decent school.
0:22:08 > 0:22:11You know what the state schools are like around here.
0:22:13 > 0:22:15She used to love school.
0:22:16 > 0:22:17Now she hates it.
0:22:21 > 0:22:23She hasn't read this in years.
0:22:23 > 0:22:26I don't know what she's doing with it now.
0:22:28 > 0:22:30She told me it makes her feel safe.
0:22:33 > 0:22:34Did she say that?
0:22:47 > 0:22:49She's just a little girl.
0:22:52 > 0:22:53What have I done?
0:22:56 > 0:22:58Certainly. Goodbye.
0:22:58 > 0:22:59Hello.
0:22:59 > 0:23:02How can I help you, Dr Vere?
0:23:02 > 0:23:05What time was your doctor's appointment again, Mrs Tembe?
0:23:05 > 0:23:10- Oh, well, I, er... I'm still sorting that out.- Yeah.
0:23:10 > 0:23:12I thought so. You owe me an apple.
0:23:12 > 0:23:15Yes, well, it's too bad. I have eaten it.
0:23:18 > 0:23:21- What do you think you are doing? - Come on.
0:23:21 > 0:23:22I'd like to examine you.
0:23:22 > 0:23:25- I really do not have time for this. - It will take five minutes,
0:23:25 > 0:23:28and it will put my mind at rest. And yours.
0:23:28 > 0:23:32And it will be far quicker than traipsing off to your own doctor, so please, indulge me.
0:23:33 > 0:23:36You are very convincing.
0:23:36 > 0:23:38- Thank you.- Five minutes.
0:23:48 > 0:23:51I don't know how to take the pressure off.
0:23:51 > 0:23:54How do I tell her that the tests don't matter?
0:23:54 > 0:23:55Because they do, don't they?
0:23:57 > 0:24:03Tell her... Tell her that she's an amazing daughter and one day
0:24:03 > 0:24:05she will become an amazing woman
0:24:05 > 0:24:08and it doesn't matter what marks she gets in a test.
0:24:10 > 0:24:14But it's a lie. That's not going to help her in the future,
0:24:14 > 0:24:16or get her into a university,
0:24:16 > 0:24:18or a job that probably doesn't even exist.
0:24:21 > 0:24:23Why has the rat race started in primary school?
0:24:26 > 0:24:28Mummy?
0:24:29 > 0:24:32- I'm right here, baby.- I'm so tired.
0:24:32 > 0:24:34I know, baby, I know.
0:24:39 > 0:24:40A hernia?!
0:24:40 > 0:24:44Yeah. Feels like it. Only a small one, but it's definitely there.
0:24:44 > 0:24:47- Will I need an operation? - Possibly.
0:24:47 > 0:24:50You'll need a surgical assessment first to be absolutely sure.
0:24:50 > 0:24:54- And for that you'll need... - To go to my GP for a referral.
0:24:54 > 0:24:58- Exactly.- Will I have to stop work?
0:24:58 > 0:24:59No. I don't think so.
0:24:59 > 0:25:02- Not as long as you take it easy. - I will.
0:25:02 > 0:25:05And if you stop lifting heavy boxes full of books,
0:25:05 > 0:25:06that'll probably help.
0:25:06 > 0:25:11Yes, I hear you, Dr Vere, and of course I will heed your advice.
0:25:11 > 0:25:14- Promise?- I promise.
0:25:19 > 0:25:22It feels like a jumper! You know I'm going to Thailand? It's pretty hot in Thailand.
0:25:22 > 0:25:25Oh, it is a jumper and I knitted it myself.
0:25:25 > 0:25:29- Oh, come on - get on with it! - He open presents like my grandma!
0:25:29 > 0:25:31There's no need to be polite about it - just rip it open.
0:25:34 > 0:25:36Oh! Well, that's a hammock!
0:25:36 > 0:25:39I'm going to get loads of use out of this. Thank you.
0:25:39 > 0:25:42Well, I hope you find what are looking for, Dr Clay.
0:25:42 > 0:25:45- Yeah, and come back tanned! - Yeah, I'll try my best.
0:25:47 > 0:25:48Thank you. Thank you.
0:25:50 > 0:25:52LOUD BRASS MUSIC PLAYS
0:25:52 > 0:25:57Anyone that isn't in the hat's getting eaten... Mmm! Delicious!
0:26:06 > 0:26:11- I thought you'd gone. - I haven't said goodbye, have I?
0:26:11 > 0:26:13I'm glad you hung around.
0:26:13 > 0:26:18I sold your Beer And Brass Festival ticket. All right?
0:26:18 > 0:26:22I made 20 quid. Would you say that's good or bad karma?
0:26:22 > 0:26:26I don't know. I'll e-mail you when I find out.
0:26:29 > 0:26:31Why didn't you tell me?
0:26:31 > 0:26:33Everyone else seems to know.
0:26:33 > 0:26:35Because I knew how you'd react.
0:26:39 > 0:26:43Why couldn't a Buddhist hoover under his sofa?
0:26:44 > 0:26:47Because he didn't have any attachments.
0:26:55 > 0:26:57Funny.
0:27:01 > 0:27:04How To Speak Man: A User's Guide For The Modern Woman.
0:27:04 > 0:27:07- Is this on prescription? - If it's not, it should be.
0:27:07 > 0:27:09Don't worry, Heston, we won't let you go through this alone.
0:27:09 > 0:27:11- Through what?- That's the spirit.
0:27:11 > 0:27:16This is no longer a lunch break, ladies. This is war.
0:27:16 > 0:27:18- I'm going to go and apologise. - Finally.
0:27:18 > 0:27:20If you do that,
0:27:20 > 0:27:23you will simply perpetuate the idea that woman are the weaker sex!