Sophie's Choice

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0:00:27 > 0:00:32Uh-huh. Yes, of course I understand. No, poor Daisy.

0:00:32 > 0:00:34No, no, I haven't even started getting ready.

0:00:34 > 0:00:36You caught me just in time.

0:00:36 > 0:00:38All right, well, give her my best.

0:00:38 > 0:00:40Bye. Oh.

0:00:45 > 0:00:47PHONE RINGS

0:00:50 > 0:00:52- Hello?- Dr Reid?

0:00:52 > 0:00:56It's Ralph Bradley, chair of Mayfield Community Garden Project.

0:00:56 > 0:00:57We spoke a couple of weeks ago,

0:00:57 > 0:00:59when I dropped off a flyer about our launch party.

0:00:59 > 0:01:00Yes...

0:01:00 > 0:01:02Well, it's this evening.

0:01:02 > 0:01:05Sophie's gone to town on her gourmet nibbles,

0:01:05 > 0:01:07so I do hope you'll come along?

0:01:07 > 0:01:10No need to bring a bottle - we have refreshments galore.

0:01:10 > 0:01:12We'll look forward to seeing you then.

0:01:12 > 0:01:13Right.

0:01:13 > 0:01:15OK, bye-bye.

0:01:19 > 0:01:21There we go.

0:01:22 > 0:01:25Mite cream, nit shampoo...

0:01:27 > 0:01:29- ..and cream buns.- Mm.

0:01:29 > 0:01:31Later, we've got to wash everything first.

0:01:31 > 0:01:33Cover ourselves in this.

0:01:33 > 0:01:35SHE SCREAMS

0:01:35 > 0:01:38Oh, just you wait, your time is coming.

0:01:38 > 0:01:40We haven't got head lice.

0:01:40 > 0:01:42No, it's the same stuff that's in the cream.

0:01:42 > 0:01:45And who's to say they are not burrowing into my scalp,

0:01:45 > 0:01:47as we speak?

0:01:47 > 0:01:50- It's not as bad as that. - I'm infested!

0:01:50 > 0:01:53And, I'm sorry, but it's the thought of them in every nook and cranny,

0:01:53 > 0:01:54eating me alive.

0:01:54 > 0:01:56Not for much longer.

0:01:56 > 0:01:59Until the next time you arrest some bug-ridden reprobate.

0:01:59 > 0:02:02Or I get a hug from a vulnerable person, with extras.

0:02:02 > 0:02:05You know, I might knock this VPAS thing on the head.

0:02:05 > 0:02:06Or maybe just leave altogether.

0:02:06 > 0:02:09Oh, get off. You love working at the Mill.

0:02:09 > 0:02:12With the stroppy patients and the germs.

0:02:12 > 0:02:15And now I'm housing actual parasites.

0:02:15 > 0:02:16We both are.

0:02:16 > 0:02:18You think that your clientele are rough?

0:02:18 > 0:02:21You should spend a day in the Custody Suite.

0:02:21 > 0:02:26It's just one of the risks of interacting with the general public.

0:02:26 > 0:02:28You need to take the medication.

0:02:28 > 0:02:31- Emma Reid.- Through there, Emma.

0:02:31 > 0:02:35Darling, just give the group therapy a try, OK?

0:02:39 > 0:02:41It's Dr Reid, isn't it? Number 17?

0:02:41 > 0:02:43Yes. Please, call me Emma.

0:02:43 > 0:02:46- Right. Let me get you a drink. - Oh, thank you.

0:02:46 > 0:02:49Wine? Fruit juice? Or something stronger?

0:02:49 > 0:02:51A glass of red would be lovely.

0:02:51 > 0:02:53Thank you so much for coming.

0:02:53 > 0:02:57I think you'll find it a very interesting evening.

0:02:57 > 0:03:00We've got another medical professional.

0:03:00 > 0:03:03Nigel Starmers - retired surgeon.

0:03:03 > 0:03:04Paediatrics, I believe.

0:03:04 > 0:03:06He's at number 8.

0:03:07 > 0:03:10- Thank you. - Come and meet our committee members.

0:03:10 > 0:03:12CLEARS THROAT

0:03:12 > 0:03:14LAUGHTER

0:03:16 > 0:03:171967.

0:03:18 > 0:03:19I was minus nine.

0:03:21 > 0:03:24Patrick Troughton as Doctor Who.

0:03:24 > 0:03:27Sergeant Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band.

0:03:27 > 0:03:30I don't imagine you two were into much psychedelia.

0:03:33 > 0:03:35Wow, nice hat, Pater.

0:03:36 > 0:03:40Who's that? Terry?

0:03:42 > 0:03:45Not the infamous Uncle Terry?

0:03:47 > 0:03:48Black sheep of the family.

0:03:48 > 0:03:50How did this escape the purge? Uncle Terry.

0:03:54 > 0:03:55Mother would know.

0:04:05 > 0:04:08Green to answer, Mother. Green to answer.

0:04:09 > 0:04:12Hello, darling, I wasn't expecting you yet.

0:04:12 > 0:04:15You've got new hair.

0:04:15 > 0:04:16It's the same hair, just shorter.

0:04:17 > 0:04:20I can call you back in a bit, if you're busy...

0:04:20 > 0:04:22No, it's lovely to see you.

0:04:22 > 0:04:24I so enjoy our little chats.

0:04:24 > 0:04:25Me too, Mum.

0:04:25 > 0:04:27Me too.

0:04:27 > 0:04:29Of course, the application is critical.

0:04:29 > 0:04:34If we don't get that right, then we fall at the first hurdle.

0:04:34 > 0:04:37So... Now, Emma.

0:04:37 > 0:04:41What do you think? Full plans or broad-brush outline?

0:04:41 > 0:04:43Well, if you give them the full plans,

0:04:43 > 0:04:45then they have all the details

0:04:45 > 0:04:46but, you know, perhaps if you...

0:04:46 > 0:04:48Sorry for interrupting.

0:04:48 > 0:04:49Sorry, Prof.

0:04:49 > 0:04:51I missed the kick-off again.

0:04:54 > 0:04:57Apply cream to whole body, including neck,

0:04:57 > 0:04:59palms of hands, soles of feet.

0:04:59 > 0:05:01That's weird.

0:05:01 > 0:05:04Wrists, elbows, armpits, buttocks.

0:05:04 > 0:05:05- Face?- Yeah.

0:05:05 > 0:05:09And if infected with scabies, put under fingernails and toenails.

0:05:09 > 0:05:11Right, come on, then, I'll go first.

0:05:11 > 0:05:13You do the honours.

0:05:18 > 0:05:20Oh! Your hands are freezing!

0:05:20 > 0:05:22Oh, wuss.

0:05:22 > 0:05:24I'm a wuss? Right, let's see who's a wuss.

0:05:24 > 0:05:26Drop the robe.

0:05:26 > 0:05:30You can warm your hands up on my flippin' feet, first.

0:05:36 > 0:05:38Now that is not bad.

0:05:38 > 0:05:40Whoa. Whoa! What are you doing?

0:05:40 > 0:05:41Well, we may as well make it fun.

0:05:41 > 0:05:44No close contact until the treatment is successful.

0:05:44 > 0:05:45Spoilsport.

0:05:45 > 0:05:47It's what it says on the instructions.

0:05:47 > 0:05:49And anyway, that's probably how we passed it between us

0:05:49 > 0:05:52- in the first place.- Urgh.

0:05:55 > 0:05:56Oh, no, wait, hang on.

0:05:56 > 0:05:58Shouldn't we put the cream on before we change the bed?

0:05:58 > 0:06:00What if the little blighters get wind of the apocalypse

0:06:00 > 0:06:03- and make a run for it? - Well, it will get on the duvet.

0:06:03 > 0:06:06Yeah, but it'll get on the sheets anyway, once we go to bed.

0:06:06 > 0:06:08What do the instructions say?

0:06:11 > 0:06:12O-M-G.

0:06:14 > 0:06:16- We've done it wrong?- No.

0:06:16 > 0:06:19This is the same stuff they put on pets, for fleas.

0:06:19 > 0:06:23Well, I guess that makes sense - fleas, scabies.

0:06:23 > 0:06:26Yes, but Geoffrey just has a couple of drops on the back of his neck.

0:06:26 > 0:06:28We've got to rub this stuff all over!

0:06:28 > 0:06:29I'm sure it's safe, Valerie.

0:06:29 > 0:06:30Anyway, what's the alternative?

0:06:30 > 0:06:33Yeah, I suppose.

0:06:33 > 0:06:35It doesn't say anything about sheets.

0:06:39 > 0:06:41Come here. Give it here.

0:06:42 > 0:06:44Barry had a right knack for bedding.

0:06:44 > 0:06:46He did a demonstration for me once.

0:06:48 > 0:06:49Still, you can't build a relationship

0:06:49 > 0:06:54on duvet-changing ability alone, can you?

0:06:54 > 0:06:57Have you come to any decision about Ruhma and Heston's wedding redo?

0:06:57 > 0:06:59SHE SIGHS

0:06:59 > 0:07:01I'm not sure I'll be able to face going.

0:07:01 > 0:07:03But it's not about me, is it?

0:07:03 > 0:07:06I mean, if it makes things right for them,

0:07:06 > 0:07:08then I'm glad.

0:07:10 > 0:07:12Well...

0:07:12 > 0:07:13..I think you're very brave.

0:07:15 > 0:07:18And even if we are successful with the grant application,

0:07:18 > 0:07:21it's likely to be a modest sum, so we'll need to make it stretch.

0:07:21 > 0:07:24You know, value for money, if you will.

0:07:24 > 0:07:28Just a thought, Prof, have you considered approaching Haslops?

0:07:28 > 0:07:31Offer a sponsorship deal.

0:07:31 > 0:07:34They provide landscaping materials, a few shrubs, whatever,

0:07:34 > 0:07:35we put up a plaque,

0:07:35 > 0:07:38and bang on about their community spirit in our publicity.

0:07:38 > 0:07:39I think you're on to something there.

0:07:39 > 0:07:41Leave it with me. I know their chief exec.

0:07:41 > 0:07:43Of course you do.

0:07:43 > 0:07:46Well, assuming that our local garden centre

0:07:46 > 0:07:47chips in a bit, then I think...

0:07:47 > 0:07:50Prof? I reckon we've done the budget to death.

0:07:50 > 0:07:51How about we get stuck into

0:07:51 > 0:07:54whatever it is Sophie's rustling up in the kitchen?

0:07:54 > 0:07:56Of course. Excuse me a second. I'll just...

0:07:58 > 0:08:00- Top-up?- Thank you.

0:08:00 > 0:08:02Oh, actually, would you mind?

0:08:02 > 0:08:04I just need to say hello properly.

0:08:04 > 0:08:06- I will be right back. - Of course.

0:08:10 > 0:08:12Of course I remember!

0:08:12 > 0:08:14We were on our holidays.

0:08:14 > 0:08:18Your father bought me a "Kiss Me Quick" hat.

0:08:18 > 0:08:20Why are you not wearing it in the photo?

0:08:20 > 0:08:21I'd lost it by then.

0:08:22 > 0:08:24I broke the strap and it blew away.

0:08:24 > 0:08:26Yeah. A likely excuse.

0:08:27 > 0:08:29Kiss Me Quick?

0:08:33 > 0:08:35I did find this other photo.

0:08:35 > 0:08:37Ah, doesn't he look young there?

0:08:39 > 0:08:43This other chap, that's his brother, isn't it?

0:08:43 > 0:08:44I can't say.

0:08:45 > 0:08:46Come on.

0:08:48 > 0:08:50If you tell me, I won't tell anyone else.

0:08:50 > 0:08:52That's Terry.

0:08:54 > 0:08:56So what happened to him?

0:08:57 > 0:08:58If I told you, you wouldn't believe me.

0:08:58 > 0:09:01Try me.

0:09:01 > 0:09:04It nearly broke your grandparents.

0:09:04 > 0:09:05They had to move.

0:09:06 > 0:09:09And your poor father. It nearly split us up.

0:09:10 > 0:09:15My parents were horrified to be associated, if only by marriage.

0:09:15 > 0:09:19It made for some very awkward family get-togethers.

0:09:19 > 0:09:23Aunt Sylvia's funeral! Oh!

0:09:23 > 0:09:25SHE SIGHS

0:09:36 > 0:09:39Sushi? I have fish or vegetarian?

0:09:39 > 0:09:40No, thank you.

0:09:40 > 0:09:42But you've clearly gone to a lot of trouble.

0:09:42 > 0:09:44Well, it's for a good cause.

0:09:44 > 0:09:46People are kind enough to give up their time.

0:09:46 > 0:09:48I hope you weren't bored.

0:09:48 > 0:09:50No, no, not at all.

0:09:50 > 0:09:52Excuse me.

0:09:52 > 0:09:56I've got to get the chicken nibbles out of the oven.

0:09:56 > 0:09:59Has it sunk in yet?

0:09:59 > 0:10:00No.

0:10:02 > 0:10:05You know it's Heston and Ruhma's wedding thing coming up?

0:10:05 > 0:10:06I do.

0:10:06 > 0:10:08Was that a joke?

0:10:09 > 0:10:11Is it going to bring back painful memories?

0:10:12 > 0:10:14No, that's all behind me.

0:10:14 > 0:10:15I'll be fine.

0:10:15 > 0:10:18So maybe it's time to come off the antidepressants.

0:10:18 > 0:10:21But I'm on an even keel, so why risk it?

0:10:21 > 0:10:23So are you going to come to the redo?

0:10:23 > 0:10:24If I'm not working.

0:10:24 > 0:10:26And if Heston wants me to.

0:10:26 > 0:10:27We do have bridges to build.

0:10:27 > 0:10:30It's not your fault he got himself into bother.

0:10:30 > 0:10:33He thinks I should have followed his lead sooner.

0:10:34 > 0:10:35You can't be everywhere.

0:10:35 > 0:10:38And everybody has to make difficult decisions, don't they?

0:10:38 > 0:10:40With limited resources.

0:10:40 > 0:10:41And Heston knows that.

0:10:45 > 0:10:50Ah, I see you've requisitioned the hors d'oeuvres now?

0:10:51 > 0:10:54That is not requisitioned, I brought it myself.

0:10:55 > 0:10:57Ralph is a single malt man,

0:10:57 > 0:11:00he chooses wine based on the picture on the label.

0:11:00 > 0:11:03What about Sophie? She seems like a woman with good taste.

0:11:03 > 0:11:04Teetotal.

0:11:04 > 0:11:07She's not on the 12 steps, if that's what you're thinking.

0:11:07 > 0:11:09I wasn't!

0:11:09 > 0:11:12It's all about control with Sophie.

0:11:12 > 0:11:14They seem like an unlikely couple.

0:11:15 > 0:11:19How they managed to hook up in the first place is a mystery to me.

0:11:19 > 0:11:22How they've stayed together for 20 years is even more mysterious.

0:11:22 > 0:11:24That's an achievement these days.

0:11:25 > 0:11:27You've made short work of that Rioja.

0:11:27 > 0:11:28- I shared!- Uh-huh!

0:11:32 > 0:11:36Oh, certainly, there we go. Enjoy!

0:11:41 > 0:11:42I'm Adam.

0:11:42 > 0:11:44Emma.

0:11:44 > 0:11:45Ah, Dr Emma Reid.

0:11:45 > 0:11:47- Ralph told me.- Ah.

0:11:47 > 0:11:48Some people name-drop celebrities,

0:11:48 > 0:11:51with Ralph it is members of the medical profession.

0:11:51 > 0:11:53So, tell me.

0:11:53 > 0:11:55What is it like to be a GP?

0:11:55 > 0:12:00Well, it's challenging, fascinating and endlessly surprising.

0:12:00 > 0:12:02Your turn.

0:12:02 > 0:12:05Where to start? I'm a man of many parts.

0:12:05 > 0:12:09Are you? Well, maybe you should start with the edited highlights.

0:12:09 > 0:12:11OK. Architect.

0:12:11 > 0:12:13Single, no kids.

0:12:13 > 0:12:15You've never been married?

0:12:15 > 0:12:17I've never met the right woman.

0:12:17 > 0:12:18Haven't you?

0:12:21 > 0:12:25Jill and Richard hired a castle for their wedding, in Strathclyde.

0:12:25 > 0:12:28Uncle Terry, he was married, wasn't he?

0:12:29 > 0:12:31You had a girlfriend once, didn't you?

0:12:32 > 0:12:35We're not talking about me, Mother. We're talking about Uncle Terry.

0:12:35 > 0:12:36What happened to her?

0:12:36 > 0:12:41You know what? She ran away with the circus, it was extraordinary.

0:12:43 > 0:12:46Alasdair, why are you always alone?

0:12:47 > 0:12:50There's nothing wrong with being single, Mother.

0:12:50 > 0:12:52You must have done something?

0:12:52 > 0:12:55Yeah, of course I did. It's my fault. It's always my fault.

0:12:55 > 0:12:57You push people away.

0:12:57 > 0:12:59HE SIGHS

0:12:59 > 0:13:02Tell me more about your Scottish castle.

0:13:02 > 0:13:05Did you dance the Gay Gordons?

0:13:05 > 0:13:09No, but I did a Bossa Nova with the laird!

0:13:12 > 0:13:13I hope it works.

0:13:13 > 0:13:16I really, really, really don't want to go through this again.

0:13:16 > 0:13:18Oh, thank you.

0:13:18 > 0:13:22I can't wait to wash the filthy creatures off me.

0:13:22 > 0:13:23Well, you say that.

0:13:23 > 0:13:27But, did you know that they actually don't wash away?

0:13:27 > 0:13:29They lie dead under your skin.

0:13:29 > 0:13:30That's horrific!

0:13:30 > 0:13:33I'm going to be like some walking scabies graveyard.

0:13:33 > 0:13:35The body absorbs them after a while.

0:13:35 > 0:13:38Is that supposed to make me feel better?

0:13:38 > 0:13:42Oh, do you know, maybe it is time to step away from public service.

0:13:42 > 0:13:44It's just been one thing after another.

0:13:45 > 0:13:50What? So after all the things that you've dealt with recently,

0:13:50 > 0:13:52you're going to let these bugs get to you?

0:13:52 > 0:13:54Well, when you put it like that.

0:13:55 > 0:13:57We will defeat the mites.

0:13:59 > 0:14:00Live another day...

0:14:03 > 0:14:05..foster some more kids...

0:14:07 > 0:14:08..save some more lives.

0:14:10 > 0:14:12We'll be fine.

0:14:12 > 0:14:14Mwah!

0:14:16 > 0:14:18Of course, neutrophils are the big guns

0:14:18 > 0:14:20of the innate immune system -

0:14:20 > 0:14:23dashing to the rescue at the first hint of inflammation.

0:14:23 > 0:14:24Then you've got the eosinophils,

0:14:24 > 0:14:27Now, eosinophils are another form of white blood cell.

0:14:27 > 0:14:29And without white blood cells, you know, we'd all be dead.

0:14:29 > 0:14:31Darling, we need some more wine.

0:14:31 > 0:14:33Oh, duty calls.

0:14:41 > 0:14:43It's like she's got some sort of radar

0:14:43 > 0:14:46for picking up on Ralph-generated distress signals.

0:14:46 > 0:14:48How do you know them?

0:14:48 > 0:14:49I met Ralph at uni.

0:14:49 > 0:14:52We bonded over our shared infatuation with Lucy Collins.

0:14:52 > 0:14:53Lucy Collins?

0:14:53 > 0:14:55Yeah, she was a student in our year.

0:14:55 > 0:14:58I don't think she realised we even existed.

0:14:58 > 0:15:00She left after two terms -

0:15:00 > 0:15:02formed a rock band with one of the groundsmen.

0:15:02 > 0:15:04We never saw her again.

0:15:04 > 0:15:05Ah, young love.

0:15:05 > 0:15:08Yeah, we lost Lucy but found each other.

0:15:08 > 0:15:10He did nearly kill me once, though. Over a prawn curry.

0:15:11 > 0:15:13It was entirely accidental, so I forgave him.

0:15:13 > 0:15:16SHE LAUGHS

0:15:16 > 0:15:17Emma, I just wanted to thank you

0:15:17 > 0:15:19for your very perceptive comments earlier.

0:15:19 > 0:15:23I believe you'd be a really useful asset to our cause.

0:15:23 > 0:15:26Would you consider joining the committee?

0:15:26 > 0:15:28Would you excuse me.

0:15:28 > 0:15:29Sorry.

0:15:31 > 0:15:32Well...

0:15:35 > 0:15:37Turn that frown upside down.

0:15:37 > 0:15:40What are you playing at? Just go.

0:15:40 > 0:15:41And if I don't?

0:15:41 > 0:15:43I'll tell Ralph.

0:15:43 > 0:15:45- I doubt that.- Don't push me.

0:15:45 > 0:15:49You will not say a word, unless, of course, you want to destroy him.

0:15:53 > 0:15:55That was a wonderful holiday.

0:15:55 > 0:15:57Mother.

0:15:57 > 0:16:00What did Terry do that was so bad?

0:16:02 > 0:16:03SHE SIGHS

0:16:05 > 0:16:08He betrayed his country for a woman.

0:16:09 > 0:16:11Uncle Terry was a traitor?!

0:16:13 > 0:16:15She was a Communist mole...

0:16:15 > 0:16:16She did a thing to him.

0:16:18 > 0:16:20What thing?

0:16:20 > 0:16:22Well, the kind of thing that women like her

0:16:22 > 0:16:24do to men to get their secrets out of them.

0:16:26 > 0:16:27She was a Red.

0:16:27 > 0:16:29A Communist.

0:16:29 > 0:16:30Sorry.

0:16:30 > 0:16:35A Soviet spy seduced Uncle Terry?

0:16:35 > 0:16:37Well, if he hadn't had his cover blown,

0:16:37 > 0:16:39we could all be speaking Russian by now.

0:16:39 > 0:16:41I suppose we've got Auntie Maureen to thank for that.

0:16:41 > 0:16:43That's Terry's wife?

0:16:43 > 0:16:45Awful woman.

0:16:45 > 0:16:47Terrible snob.

0:16:47 > 0:16:49OK. So, what did Maureen the snob do

0:16:49 > 0:16:51to save us from the Red Menace?

0:16:51 > 0:16:54Well, she suspected him of having an affair,

0:16:54 > 0:16:56so she hired a private detective.

0:16:56 > 0:17:02He traced them to this hotel where they were having their liaison.

0:17:02 > 0:17:05Well, of course, Auntie Maureen sneaked out one night.

0:17:05 > 0:17:07And you can imagine what happened then.

0:17:07 > 0:17:09No! Tell me.

0:17:10 > 0:17:12She caught them at it.

0:17:14 > 0:17:17From what I heard, she pulled the lampstand out of the socket

0:17:17 > 0:17:19and set about the pair of them.

0:17:19 > 0:17:21Apparently, there were these terrible screams,

0:17:21 > 0:17:24the concierge thought they having a menage a trois.

0:17:24 > 0:17:26Menage a trois?!

0:17:26 > 0:17:27Sorry. What was that, darling?

0:17:27 > 0:17:29Nothing.

0:17:29 > 0:17:31I didn't know you spoke French, Mother.

0:17:33 > 0:17:36Well, I'm going to look on the bright side.

0:17:36 > 0:17:37There's a bright side to scabies?

0:17:37 > 0:17:39Yeah.

0:17:39 > 0:17:42My counselling session will help me get through the trauma.

0:17:42 > 0:17:43Perhaps I should prioritise.

0:17:43 > 0:17:45I have got a lot of issues.

0:17:45 > 0:17:46Do you?

0:17:46 > 0:17:47Yeah.

0:17:47 > 0:17:49Well, I mean, you may see a person

0:17:49 > 0:17:52who looks completely at ease with themselves,

0:17:52 > 0:17:54but what's going on under the surface?

0:17:54 > 0:17:57Problems, multiplying, growing.

0:17:57 > 0:18:00One day, I will develop an existential itch

0:18:00 > 0:18:01and then it'll be too late.

0:18:01 > 0:18:03That's why you're having counselling?

0:18:03 > 0:18:05Well, I don't want to get stuck on medication,

0:18:05 > 0:18:08when I could just nip it in the bud with a nice little chat.

0:18:08 > 0:18:10You do know you can talk to me?

0:18:10 > 0:18:11You don't really have the training.

0:18:11 > 0:18:12As a friend, Valerie.

0:18:14 > 0:18:15There was something, actually.

0:18:17 > 0:18:18Do you know?

0:18:18 > 0:18:21This is the second year that I haven't received a Valentine's card.

0:18:21 > 0:18:23Ricky Delaine forgot again.

0:18:23 > 0:18:26Probably busy with his world tour...

0:18:26 > 0:18:28We had a brilliant girls' night in.

0:18:28 > 0:18:29Yeah, we did.

0:18:30 > 0:18:32But it just feels like it's been so long

0:18:32 > 0:18:34since anyone even noticed that I exist.

0:18:44 > 0:18:45Enjoying the party?

0:18:45 > 0:18:47Yes, very much.

0:18:47 > 0:18:51It's, well, it's always nice to come and meet some new faces.

0:18:51 > 0:18:52Adam?

0:18:52 > 0:18:53Yes.

0:18:53 > 0:18:55He can be quite intoxicating.

0:18:55 > 0:18:58Well, we do seem to be getting on rather well.

0:18:58 > 0:19:00Don't fall for it.

0:19:00 > 0:19:01I'm sorry?

0:19:01 > 0:19:03He'll ruin your life.

0:19:03 > 0:19:08Adam destroys women - I didn't see it till it was too late.

0:19:09 > 0:19:10Excuse me.

0:19:15 > 0:19:17Let me get you a glass of wine.

0:19:17 > 0:19:18No, thank you.

0:19:18 > 0:19:19A cocktail, then?

0:19:19 > 0:19:22No, I've had enough alcohol for one evening.

0:19:22 > 0:19:24In fact, I should be going.

0:19:24 > 0:19:26Well, I'll walk you.

0:19:26 > 0:19:27No.

0:19:27 > 0:19:30Ohh, Sophie.

0:19:30 > 0:19:32HE SIGHS

0:19:32 > 0:19:34- What did she say?- It doesn't matter.

0:19:34 > 0:19:36Oh, but it does.

0:19:36 > 0:19:39- Don't I get a chance to defend myself?- Excuse me.

0:19:39 > 0:19:41I really would like to know what I've been accused of.

0:19:41 > 0:19:42All right, look.

0:19:42 > 0:19:44It's none of my business who you sleep with,

0:19:44 > 0:19:45but your best friend's wife?!

0:19:52 > 0:19:54They found her two days later, on some waste ground

0:19:54 > 0:19:57behind Charing Cross Station.

0:19:57 > 0:19:59- Dead?- Alive.

0:19:59 > 0:20:00In a trunk.

0:20:00 > 0:20:01She was never the same after.

0:20:03 > 0:20:05What happened to Uncle Terry?

0:20:05 > 0:20:08Oh, the Russians smuggled him and his mistress

0:20:08 > 0:20:10out of the country in a submarine.

0:20:10 > 0:20:13It sailed right up the Solent! Can you imagine?

0:20:13 > 0:20:15The Ruskies, in our midst.

0:20:15 > 0:20:18It's a wonder we weren't all murdered in our beds.

0:20:18 > 0:20:21He took several important documents with him.

0:20:21 > 0:20:23It was a terrible scandal.

0:20:27 > 0:20:29"The submarine sailed up the Solent

0:20:29 > 0:20:35"to collect its human cargo from a rendezvous at Stokes Bay."

0:20:35 > 0:20:37That's what I said.

0:20:39 > 0:20:41I've shocked you, haven't I?

0:20:41 > 0:20:43No.

0:20:43 > 0:20:44No, I'm not shocked, Mum.

0:20:44 > 0:20:46You are. I can tell.

0:20:46 > 0:20:50I shouldn't have told you Uncle Terry was a traitor.

0:20:50 > 0:20:51But I'm glad you did.

0:20:54 > 0:20:55Is it true?

0:20:55 > 0:20:57Of course not. How many times?

0:20:58 > 0:21:00Sophie?

0:21:02 > 0:21:03Yeah?

0:21:05 > 0:21:06I know.

0:21:06 > 0:21:08You're having an affair.

0:21:08 > 0:21:09No!

0:21:09 > 0:21:11Everything makes sense now.

0:21:11 > 0:21:13You've been acting so strangely.

0:21:13 > 0:21:14Darling, please.

0:21:14 > 0:21:16There is nothing going on between me and Adam.

0:21:16 > 0:21:18Then why did she say that?

0:21:18 > 0:21:20I'm so sorry, I must have misunderstood.

0:21:20 > 0:21:22Come on, Prof. Get a grip.

0:21:22 > 0:21:23Tell me!

0:21:23 > 0:21:25It wasn't me, it was Kate.

0:21:25 > 0:21:29Kate? What? You mean our Kate!

0:21:32 > 0:21:35You've known her since she was a kid!

0:21:35 > 0:21:38She's 19, old enough to sleep with whoever she wants.

0:21:38 > 0:21:42So you're the one who got her pregnant, and then dumped her.

0:21:42 > 0:21:44It takes two.

0:21:44 > 0:21:46She tried to kill herself!

0:21:46 > 0:21:49Kate has mental health issues - you know that.

0:21:53 > 0:21:55HE GRUNTS

0:21:56 > 0:21:57Shellfish!

0:21:58 > 0:22:00My jacket?

0:22:00 > 0:22:01Can you call an ambulance?

0:22:01 > 0:22:04Have you got any adrenaline with you?

0:22:04 > 0:22:06Coat pocket.

0:22:06 > 0:22:07I'll get it.

0:22:10 > 0:22:11It's karma.

0:22:12 > 0:22:16The whole Barry debacle must have racked up some very bad vibes.

0:22:18 > 0:22:20My whole love-life is cursed

0:22:20 > 0:22:23because I ripped out his heart and stomped on it in front of witnesses.

0:22:23 > 0:22:25It is not karma.

0:22:25 > 0:22:28The whole online dating thing, now, that was a disaster.

0:22:28 > 0:22:30Well, you can't let that put you off.

0:22:30 > 0:22:32You've got to stay positive.

0:22:32 > 0:22:34Do you think I'm unlovable?

0:22:34 > 0:22:35Of course not!

0:22:38 > 0:22:41You'll probably move back in with Emma, now you're speaking again.

0:22:41 > 0:22:43Where did that come from?

0:22:43 > 0:22:45I'm happy here.

0:22:51 > 0:22:53Oh, you found it? Good. Sophie,

0:22:53 > 0:22:55- give me the pen.- No.

0:22:55 > 0:22:57What? If Adam doesn't get that, he could die.

0:22:57 > 0:22:59I hope he does.

0:22:59 > 0:23:00My daughter, Kate.

0:23:02 > 0:23:05She was happy, doing well at uni, until he...

0:23:08 > 0:23:09She's barely functioning.

0:23:09 > 0:23:12Look, what's happened to Kate is awful.

0:23:12 > 0:23:14But this isn't the way to deal with it.

0:23:14 > 0:23:15Please, Sophie.

0:23:15 > 0:23:17We haven't got time for this.

0:23:23 > 0:23:27OK, you should feel the effects of the adrenaline soon.

0:23:27 > 0:23:31Ralph, do you want to show your guests out?

0:23:31 > 0:23:32Yes, of course.

0:23:36 > 0:23:37How are you feeling?

0:23:37 > 0:23:41Who's asking? Emma or Dr Reid?

0:23:41 > 0:23:42I'm hunky-dory, Doctor.

0:23:45 > 0:23:49When you leave this house, I never want to see or hear from you again.

0:23:49 > 0:23:53Stop acting like the injured party - you just tried to kill me.

0:23:55 > 0:23:58He enjoyed his trip to Russia so much,

0:23:58 > 0:24:02he stayed and retrained as a submarine captain.

0:24:02 > 0:24:03That's right.

0:24:03 > 0:24:06Brezhnev built him his own dacha.

0:24:06 > 0:24:08He had a submarine port at the bottom of the garden.

0:24:08 > 0:24:10And he used to take the kids on a trip down the Volga.

0:24:10 > 0:24:13I'd forgotten there were kids.

0:24:14 > 0:24:16What were they called, I wonder?

0:24:16 > 0:24:21They were called, they were called Vladimir and Olga.

0:24:21 > 0:24:23Vladimir became a politician.

0:24:23 > 0:24:25And Olga, she was a very strong gymnast.

0:24:27 > 0:24:30Uncle Terry was very sporty as a young man.

0:24:33 > 0:24:35SHE YAWNS

0:24:35 > 0:24:37Mum, I've worn you out.

0:24:37 > 0:24:40Why don't you have a cup of cocoa and get an early night?

0:24:40 > 0:24:42I think I will.

0:24:42 > 0:24:44I do go on.

0:24:44 > 0:24:46I hope you weren't bored.

0:24:46 > 0:24:50Bored? After that tsunami of a revelation?

0:24:50 > 0:24:54Mum, you take my breath away.

0:24:54 > 0:24:57LAUGHS: Oh, you are funny, Alasdair.

0:24:57 > 0:25:02Right, I'm signing off now. Make sure you check under the bed.

0:25:02 > 0:25:04For Reds!

0:25:04 > 0:25:06Night, night. Mwah!

0:25:09 > 0:25:10HE SIGHS

0:25:11 > 0:25:17Uncle Terry, if your life was half as exciting as that...

0:25:19 > 0:25:21..I imagine you were quite a chap.

0:25:23 > 0:25:26Na zdorovie to you, comrade.

0:25:28 > 0:25:30That's presuming you're still around.

0:25:40 > 0:25:43Mum's happy, that's the most important thing.

0:25:53 > 0:25:55So why didn't you tell me?

0:25:55 > 0:25:57Kate begged me not to.

0:25:57 > 0:26:01I was afraid something like this might happen.

0:26:01 > 0:26:03And now he's ruined all of our lives.

0:26:03 > 0:26:07He's not involving the police.

0:26:07 > 0:26:08So...

0:26:08 > 0:26:10..I guess it's down to you, then.

0:26:11 > 0:26:13I should be going home.

0:26:16 > 0:26:20To be honest with you, this is an evening that I would rather forget.

0:26:26 > 0:26:28Wow.

0:26:28 > 0:26:31You are so good at treats.

0:26:31 > 0:26:33Oh, thank you!

0:26:33 > 0:26:35And you're thanking me?

0:26:35 > 0:26:37Well, for appreciating my efforts.

0:26:37 > 0:26:39Do you know? Only women do that.

0:26:39 > 0:26:42Men take everything for granted.

0:26:42 > 0:26:45Sometimes I think I should go down the bi route, like Emma.

0:26:45 > 0:26:46Really?

0:26:46 > 0:26:50Well, it would double the opportunity for a relationship.

0:26:50 > 0:26:53Valerie, if you want to meet someone,

0:26:53 > 0:26:55you've just got to get out there, that's all.

0:26:55 > 0:26:57I'm not going to go man shopping on my own.

0:26:57 > 0:27:00- Well, I'm up for it.- Yeah?- Yeah.

0:27:02 > 0:27:05Look at her. We are gorgeous.

0:27:05 > 0:27:07Who could refuse!

0:27:13 > 0:27:15- Hot.- Mm.

0:27:18 > 0:27:20Didn't you do work experience with us at the Mill?

0:27:20 > 0:27:24Why would you do work experience at a health centre

0:27:24 > 0:27:25if you always wanted to be a vet?

0:27:25 > 0:27:29In that case, whatever you're selling, I don't want it.

0:27:29 > 0:27:31- Did Ashley cheat on you?- No.

0:27:31 > 0:27:33So, why are you so worried about seeing him?

0:27:33 > 0:27:37- How are my windows? - They need a bit of TLC.

0:27:37 > 0:27:39You need to improve the thermal gain.