0:00:24 > 0:00:27# My whole life Waiting for the right time... #
0:00:27 > 0:00:29Our Father, who art in Heaven.
0:00:29 > 0:00:31Hallowed be thy name,
0:00:33 > 0:00:35Thy kingdom come
0:00:36 > 0:00:38Thy will be done.
0:00:38 > 0:00:40On Earth, as it is in Heaven.
0:00:41 > 0:00:44Give us this day our daily bread.
0:00:47 > 0:00:50PANICKY BREATHING
0:01:04 > 0:01:06Ayesha.
0:01:10 > 0:01:13- Where are you staying? - None of your business.
0:01:13 > 0:01:16Come on, don't be like that. Look, I know I made a mistake.
0:01:16 > 0:01:20Dr Reid, sorry to interrupt, but we have a problem at the campus.
0:01:20 > 0:01:24- Oh, right.- Mrs Hollins is arranging a locum for this afternoon.
0:01:25 > 0:01:27- Please take a seat.- Thanks.
0:01:29 > 0:01:31- Thank you for fitting me in. - Oh, not a problem.
0:01:31 > 0:01:33So, how can I help you today?
0:01:34 > 0:01:38- I haven't slept much lately.- When did your sleeping problems begin?
0:01:38 > 0:01:40About... I don't know, a month ago?
0:01:40 > 0:01:42So, what happened a month ago?
0:01:42 > 0:01:45Nothing, I just couldn't sleep any more.
0:01:45 > 0:01:48I actually used to have trouble before.
0:01:48 > 0:01:51- You've probably got my notes. - Er, yeah.
0:01:51 > 0:01:54I've got some notes, but I'd rather hear it from you, if that's OK.
0:01:55 > 0:02:00Well, I... I have a problem with OCD, or I had.
0:02:00 > 0:02:03Um, I had to do some cognitive therapy thing.
0:02:03 > 0:02:06- Cognitive behavioural therapy. - Yeah. It was fine.
0:02:06 > 0:02:08They gave me some pills as well, actually.
0:02:08 > 0:02:12I was hoping I could just get that part. Just some sleeping pills.
0:02:12 > 0:02:14The pills that you were prescribed were SSRIs,
0:02:14 > 0:02:16they're a type of antidepressant.
0:02:16 > 0:02:19They're commonly prescribed for OCD, but not specifically for sleeping.
0:02:19 > 0:02:23OK, well, not them. Just something strong, you know?
0:02:23 > 0:02:25Just so I can knock myself out.
0:02:39 > 0:02:40Wow!
0:02:40 > 0:02:41Busy.
0:02:41 > 0:02:44I know. Started coming in about ten minutes ago.
0:02:44 > 0:02:46There are 20 messages on the answer machine.
0:02:46 > 0:02:50Is it a plague? Is it a student ritual gone wrong?
0:02:50 > 0:02:54- Um, Megan's in this morning? - Yeah, she's in with a patient.
0:02:54 > 0:02:56Do you think we need to do something?
0:02:56 > 0:03:00- Like what?- Well, put them in quarantine?
0:03:00 > 0:03:02We need to know what we're dealing with first, Karen.
0:03:02 > 0:03:04Um, Lola McIntyre?
0:03:04 > 0:03:07Hi. Do you want to come through?
0:03:12 > 0:03:15Would you mind if we talked some more about your OCD?
0:03:15 > 0:03:18I noticed you mentioned it in the past tense.
0:03:18 > 0:03:22Look, I know you can never get rid of it 100%, but it's under control.
0:03:22 > 0:03:25It doesn't run my life the way it used to.
0:03:25 > 0:03:28What are some of the differences between now and then?
0:03:28 > 0:03:30- Why are you asking me this? - I think history can be useful.
0:03:33 > 0:03:35It started when I was a kid.
0:03:35 > 0:03:38I used to get worked up about losing things,
0:03:38 > 0:03:40so I'd check my pockets a few times a day.
0:03:40 > 0:03:44And then after a while, it needed to be a certain number.
0:03:44 > 0:03:46Then it got worse, especially when I went to university.
0:03:46 > 0:03:49I'd lock the door and check that.
0:03:49 > 0:03:51And then it got so bad that I couldn't leave the flat.
0:03:51 > 0:03:54And that's when you sought treatment?
0:03:54 > 0:03:57Yeah, but I... I'm fine now.
0:03:57 > 0:03:59That was four years ago.
0:03:59 > 0:04:02Are you still checking the door?
0:04:02 > 0:04:05- Sometimes. In the morning. - And at night?
0:04:05 > 0:04:09It's not the reason I can't sleep, if that's what you're suggesting.
0:04:09 > 0:04:10OK.
0:04:11 > 0:04:14Yeah. Yeah, it is harder at night,
0:04:14 > 0:04:19but I think that's kind of normal for people with this...
0:04:19 > 0:04:22Sometimes I need to pray to clear my head.
0:04:22 > 0:04:25It builds up now because I can't check, in case I wake Casper,
0:04:25 > 0:04:27my boyfriend.
0:04:27 > 0:04:30- Is he understanding about your condition?- He's fine.
0:04:30 > 0:04:34Um, he likes to nurture people, so I'm perfect for him.
0:04:34 > 0:04:35And how does he make you feel?
0:04:35 > 0:04:37Fine.
0:04:45 > 0:04:47ANSWERPHONE BEEP
0:04:47 > 0:04:50It's me. What's going on?
0:04:50 > 0:04:52Where are you?
0:04:52 > 0:04:54Call, OK?
0:04:58 > 0:04:59Waste of time!
0:04:59 > 0:05:01Oi!
0:05:07 > 0:05:09Everything's fine. Why are you panicking suddenly?
0:05:09 > 0:05:13Because I haven't got a dress. We haven't even picked the rings.
0:05:13 > 0:05:16You have not even decided which menu.
0:05:16 > 0:05:21- Oh, I am so sorry to interrupt. You are talking about the wedding.- Yes.
0:05:21 > 0:05:24Well, I was wanting to ask if there was some way I might be able
0:05:24 > 0:05:26- to contribute. - MOBILE RINGS
0:05:26 > 0:05:28Excuse me. I need to take this call.
0:05:30 > 0:05:31Er, hello.
0:05:33 > 0:05:35Right. Have you isolated the patients?
0:05:36 > 0:05:40OK. Just call me back as soon as you have confirmation.
0:05:40 > 0:05:42Right, thank you.
0:05:42 > 0:05:44Problem?
0:05:44 > 0:05:48Er, there has been an outbreak of gastroenteritis.
0:05:48 > 0:05:51Dr Vere is sending some samples over to the laboratory.
0:05:51 > 0:05:55- Good idea.- Mm, indeed. Now, the wedding.
0:05:55 > 0:05:59I just wondered if you had anybody to do the flower arrangements.
0:05:59 > 0:06:01Flowers?
0:06:01 > 0:06:06Yes, well, for the hall and the table and your bouquet, of course.
0:06:06 > 0:06:10It might be nice to get something that ties all the themes together.
0:06:10 > 0:06:14- Do you not think?- Yes. No... Because it's just another decision.
0:06:14 > 0:06:16It's only a week till the wedding.
0:06:16 > 0:06:19Ten days. The important elements are in hand.
0:06:19 > 0:06:21The food, the venue, the musical arrangements.
0:06:21 > 0:06:23Yeah, because I could just wear a T-shirt, couldn't I?
0:06:23 > 0:06:26- We could just eat whatever they give us.- I understand.
0:06:26 > 0:06:29It's just I know how stressful these events can be.
0:06:29 > 0:06:32- I know and you are very busy... - She's offering to help.
0:06:32 > 0:06:37- Thank you, Mrs Tembe.- If you could bear to, that would be wonderful.
0:06:37 > 0:06:40Yes, of course. Anything I can do to make things easier.
0:06:52 > 0:06:54MOBILE ALERT
0:06:59 > 0:07:03- MESSAGE:- 'What's going on? Where are you? Call, OK?'
0:07:06 > 0:07:09'Can I ask how long you've been in a relationship?'
0:07:09 > 0:07:11'You can, but I don't know why it's relevant.'
0:07:11 > 0:07:15'Well, you said you were worried about waking Casper up.'
0:07:15 > 0:07:17Look, this is normal for me.
0:07:17 > 0:07:20OK? I had to worry about the same thing with my family.
0:07:20 > 0:07:22I'm used to lying in bed, forcing myself to stop.
0:07:22 > 0:07:24You said that you pray out loud.
0:07:24 > 0:07:26That must be difficult with a partner.
0:07:26 > 0:07:28- Why are you bringing this up? - I'm just...
0:07:28 > 0:07:30I'm trying to work out if it's a flare up and that might be
0:07:30 > 0:07:33what's contributing to your sleeping problems.
0:07:33 > 0:07:37Look, you can't separate... When you're tired, your OCD gets worse.
0:07:37 > 0:07:38It's logical.
0:07:38 > 0:07:41- You said that it started a month ago?- That's right.
0:07:41 > 0:07:43When did Casper move in?
0:07:43 > 0:07:47- Look, if this is too difficult... - It's not.
0:07:47 > 0:07:51It's not, I just know you're going to turn this into something.
0:07:51 > 0:07:52He moved in a month ago, so...
0:07:56 > 0:08:01Sister, yes, we are just printing out menu options now.
0:08:01 > 0:08:03Right, of course.
0:08:03 > 0:08:07No, I will make sure he makes a decision by lunchtime. Goodbye.
0:08:07 > 0:08:12- Is Heston being difficult? - No, he just likes to take his time.
0:08:12 > 0:08:16Meanwhile, you're responsible for everything. I don't envy you.
0:08:16 > 0:08:20- Oh, no. I am not responsible for... - You're the matron of honour.
0:08:20 > 0:08:22That makes you really responsible!
0:08:22 > 0:08:24Lots of people wouldn't take it on.
0:08:24 > 0:08:26Weddings are big business these days.
0:08:26 > 0:08:30Everything has to run like clockwork. And who do they rely on?
0:08:31 > 0:08:33Well, I... I am just helping out.
0:08:33 > 0:08:35Yeah, but you're a perfectionist, aren't you?
0:08:35 > 0:08:37So they know what you can do for them.
0:08:37 > 0:08:41Ooh, and don't forget you've got to organise the hen do as well,
0:08:41 > 0:08:43which has also got to be perfect.
0:08:43 > 0:08:45Oh, no. Don't envy you at all!
0:08:50 > 0:08:54Because that's two nights in a row and you know what happens.
0:08:54 > 0:08:58Yeah, well, just in case. I'll sort something else out.
0:08:58 > 0:09:01Ayesha, someone, I know not who, has stolen my nebulizer.
0:09:01 > 0:09:04- I need a spare one, please. - Mum, hang on. I'm on the phone.
0:09:04 > 0:09:06I need a nebulizer.
0:09:06 > 0:09:09I'm going to have to go. Someone's hassling me.
0:09:09 > 0:09:12I'm really sorry to disturb your personal phone call with my
0:09:12 > 0:09:13professional needs, Nurse Lee(!)
0:09:13 > 0:09:16I don't know yet, but I'll sort something else out.
0:09:16 > 0:09:19It's not a problem. OK, I'll speak to you later. Bye.
0:09:22 > 0:09:27- Everything all right?- Fine, except I had a massive bust up with Emma.
0:09:27 > 0:09:29Ooh, and now you need somewhere else to stay.
0:09:29 > 0:09:31- Seriously?- Seriously.
0:09:33 > 0:09:35You hear a girl's in trouble and you step up, just like that?
0:09:35 > 0:09:39Sorry, you're in a hurry. Cupboard above the sink.
0:09:39 > 0:09:41It's just wow! Thanks, Al!
0:09:41 > 0:09:45- You're a real mate. I'd better call Mum back.- No, um... Thank YOU.
0:09:48 > 0:09:54Hey. Yeah. I know. I just thought you... Doesn't matter.
0:09:57 > 0:10:00It's Alex. He took off last night.
0:10:01 > 0:10:03Look, don't start, please. I'm worried.
0:10:05 > 0:10:09I don't know. He was fine when we went to bed and then I woke up
0:10:09 > 0:10:12and... Um, no. All his clothes are here. So no.
0:10:12 > 0:10:14Mum, why would he be seeing someone else?
0:10:19 > 0:10:22Er, Mum, I'm not really listening.
0:10:22 > 0:10:25Yeah, that was Nathan. Alex is Alex.
0:10:25 > 0:10:29Look, Mum, forget it. I've got a class. I've got to go.
0:10:29 > 0:10:32Yeah, I'll speak to you later. Love you.
0:10:40 > 0:10:43Did you not feel like you could talk to Casper?
0:10:43 > 0:10:45He's got nothing to do with this, OK?
0:10:45 > 0:10:48You're acting like it's this big thing that he's moved in with me.
0:10:48 > 0:10:49Well, guess what.
0:10:49 > 0:10:52I've been seeing him for a year, sleeping with him, no problems.
0:10:52 > 0:10:55- Did um...? Did anything change after he moved in?- No.
0:10:55 > 0:11:00Nothing. He's the same amazingly gentle guy he's always been.
0:11:00 > 0:11:02He sounds wonderful.
0:11:05 > 0:11:07Did you meet him here at uni?
0:11:07 > 0:11:11He's... He's on my course.
0:11:11 > 0:11:14He showed me around when I first arrived. He's like that.
0:11:14 > 0:11:17- He looks out for you?- Yeah.
0:11:18 > 0:11:21- Although he probably shouldn't. - Why do you say that?
0:11:23 > 0:11:25Why do you say he probably shouldn't?
0:11:25 > 0:11:27You look out for him, don't you?
0:11:29 > 0:11:31It's just, um...
0:11:31 > 0:11:34He's not the best at choosing partners.
0:11:34 > 0:11:38The guy before me had jealousy issues and he attacked Casper
0:11:38 > 0:11:39so badly, he ended up in hospital.
0:11:41 > 0:11:45- What's going on?- I'm just... I'm just tired!
0:11:45 > 0:11:46You know, I've been up all night.
0:11:46 > 0:11:49And you said you were going to help, so are you or not?
0:11:49 > 0:11:52- Because I didn't come here for relationship advice!- I understand.
0:11:52 > 0:11:55No, you don't, obviously! All I want is a prescription.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57Instead, you're going on and on and on about my OCD,
0:11:57 > 0:12:01- my personal relationships.- OK, can we just...?- No! You know what?
0:12:01 > 0:12:03This is just... This is just a waste of time.
0:12:07 > 0:12:08Right.
0:12:08 > 0:12:10Thank you.
0:12:13 > 0:12:17I have managed to book a restaurant with a private room.
0:12:17 > 0:12:19- For what?- The hen party.
0:12:19 > 0:12:22You know, it is very difficult to get somewhere central,
0:12:22 > 0:12:24but luckily, I have contacts.
0:12:26 > 0:12:28- You weren't at the proposal either, were you?- No.
0:12:28 > 0:12:31But you saw the video. No-one can say they held back.
0:12:33 > 0:12:36It's probably one of the most romantic things I've ever seen.
0:12:36 > 0:12:38Yes. Yes, it was very colourful.
0:12:38 > 0:12:41And that Navin Kundra! Oh!
0:12:41 > 0:12:43I bet he's even more gorgeous in the flesh.
0:12:43 > 0:12:46Maybe you could hire him, seeing as we missed out the first time.
0:12:46 > 0:12:49- I don't think that would be appropriate.- No.
0:12:49 > 0:12:50Maybe you're right, yeah.
0:12:50 > 0:12:53No, the hen do should be something different.
0:12:53 > 0:12:56See, that's the problem. When they've set the bar so high,
0:12:56 > 0:12:59the hen is the next stage - it should be bigger.
0:12:59 > 0:13:02Brighter. Part of the crescendo that climaxes with the wedding.
0:13:05 > 0:13:06- Climaxes?- Mm.
0:13:10 > 0:13:12I'm not saying someone's died.
0:13:12 > 0:13:15I am asking if anybody has reported any food poisoning.
0:13:17 > 0:13:20Well, thank you very much for calling me back.
0:13:24 > 0:13:27- Excuse me. Is someone helping you? - Um...
0:13:27 > 0:13:31It's just you've been in and out all morning and I don't know -
0:13:31 > 0:13:34- have you seen the doctor? - I'm not sick. I...
0:13:34 > 0:13:36I came with a friend, but she's gone home.
0:13:36 > 0:13:38- So...?- This stomach thing,
0:13:38 > 0:13:42I heard someone say it might be a virus or maybe something different.
0:13:42 > 0:13:45- I just wanted to know which. - What's that got to do with you?
0:13:48 > 0:13:50I thought this was supposed to be a paperless office.
0:13:50 > 0:13:52It will be direct marketing.
0:13:53 > 0:13:56I've had a cancellation, so guess who's finishing early.
0:13:57 > 0:13:59I'll need some keys.
0:13:59 > 0:14:01Oh, right, yeah.
0:14:01 > 0:14:06- Thing is, these are my only set. - OK, so, I'll get us copies.
0:14:06 > 0:14:09- It's not a problem, is it? - No, not a problem.
0:14:09 > 0:14:13Just be quite nice if I could go home first and tidy up a bit.
0:14:13 > 0:14:16Don't worry. You haven't seen what I'm like yet.
0:14:16 > 0:14:18Me and him are going to be housemates.
0:14:18 > 0:14:20- I can see. - I'll get these back to you.
0:14:23 > 0:14:24Oh, Haskey!
0:14:24 > 0:14:26What have you got yourself into?
0:14:35 > 0:14:37Hey.
0:14:41 > 0:14:42How are you?
0:14:42 > 0:14:44Fine.
0:14:44 > 0:14:46- Busy.- Great.
0:14:46 > 0:14:48Erm, I mean, it's nice to be busy.
0:14:49 > 0:14:52Listen, um, Friday was a bit er...
0:14:55 > 0:14:56Awkward?
0:14:58 > 0:15:01I was going to say unusual, but...
0:15:01 > 0:15:06Normally, we find it really easy to talk to each other, don't we?
0:15:06 > 0:15:10You find it easy to talk. It's my job to listen.
0:15:10 > 0:15:12Your job?
0:15:12 > 0:15:17What I mean is there's a particular dynamic, you know,
0:15:17 > 0:15:20therapist and patient, and now that's over...
0:15:20 > 0:15:25What? We went on one date.
0:15:25 > 0:15:27You can't deny how we feel the rest of the time.
0:15:27 > 0:15:31Well, sometimes it happens. There's, um...
0:15:31 > 0:15:35There's an attraction and it's actually a by-product...
0:15:35 > 0:15:38What do you mean a by-product?
0:15:38 > 0:15:40Not real.
0:15:40 > 0:15:41It feels real.
0:15:43 > 0:15:46It feels very real to me.
0:15:48 > 0:15:51I think that we need to maintain some distance.
0:15:51 > 0:15:55- But if we're working together... - Can you just try? Please?
0:16:01 > 0:16:03A meat raffle!
0:16:03 > 0:16:05That is what caused the food poisoning,
0:16:05 > 0:16:08which is what it definitely what it was.
0:16:08 > 0:16:11- Oh, we can't know that, Karen.- Jess?
0:16:14 > 0:16:19This one won a meat raffle in a pub. Do you want to tell him the rest?
0:16:19 > 0:16:21I put it in the freezer, but then my fridge broke down,
0:16:21 > 0:16:24so I decided to sell on campus.
0:16:24 > 0:16:29- That doesn't sound so bad. - Fridge broke down three weeks ago.
0:16:29 > 0:16:32I thought if you made a curry, it'd be OK. I did tell people!
0:16:32 > 0:16:35And you warned them that it was off, yeah?
0:16:35 > 0:16:37I just told them it was discounted.
0:16:39 > 0:16:40OK. Just so you know,
0:16:40 > 0:16:43the fact that it was in a curry doesn't make any difference!
0:16:43 > 0:16:45And it would have helped if you'd have told us this earlier!
0:16:45 > 0:16:47A kid came in who recognised her.
0:16:47 > 0:16:50She's been holed up in the toilets like a fugitive.
0:16:50 > 0:16:52I didn't mean to hurt anyone.
0:16:52 > 0:16:54I'm so sorry. Am I going to get in trouble?
0:16:57 > 0:16:59KNOCK AT DOOR Yeah?
0:16:59 > 0:17:02I have a seafood entree selection,
0:17:02 > 0:17:04with chicken and beef,
0:17:04 > 0:17:07both halal mains. And a vegetarian option.
0:17:07 > 0:17:10- Here is the cost comparisons. - That's very thorough.- Wait.
0:17:10 > 0:17:14These are the costings for the lakeside restaurant and the
0:17:14 > 0:17:16- boat hire. - Boat hire?!- These are just options.
0:17:16 > 0:17:19You and Sister Hanif are cutting things very fine.
0:17:19 > 0:17:22- Yes, but boat...- I am doing my best!
0:17:22 > 0:17:25I haven't even started looking at the flower arrangements yet.
0:17:25 > 0:17:27You need to make a decision!
0:17:27 > 0:17:31Now, I suggest that you look at all the options and give
0:17:31 > 0:17:33me an answer by the end of the day!
0:17:36 > 0:17:40Ruhma, darling. Can you ring me? I think we've created a monster.
0:17:43 > 0:17:46TV ON
0:17:48 > 0:17:50MUTES TV
0:17:50 > 0:17:52Um, I thought you'd be at college.
0:17:52 > 0:17:54Where have you been?
0:17:54 > 0:17:56- Walking.- What? Since last night?
0:17:56 > 0:18:01- I've been ringing you and... - Sorry, my... My phone was off.
0:18:01 > 0:18:02Oh, yeah?
0:18:02 > 0:18:04Let's see.
0:18:04 > 0:18:07Who's Sharma?
0:18:08 > 0:18:12- It's not what you think. - Then where have you been?
0:18:13 > 0:18:16You won't talk to me. You don't sleep next to me any more.
0:18:16 > 0:18:18- Most mornings, I find you on the sofa.- Not most.
0:18:19 > 0:18:23- Look, Casper, can we talk about this another time, please?- No!
0:18:23 > 0:18:26Alex, I've put up with a lot from you, more than most people would.
0:18:28 > 0:18:31- Go to college.- "Go to college"?
0:18:31 > 0:18:33That's your answer?
0:18:33 > 0:18:34Look, I've been up all night.
0:18:34 > 0:18:37- OK? I can't give any more! - You can talk!
0:18:48 > 0:18:50- 'Alex!' - KNOCKS ON DOOR
0:18:50 > 0:18:52'Let me in!
0:18:52 > 0:18:54'Alex!
0:18:54 > 0:18:56'You're worse than Nathan! You know that?
0:18:56 > 0:18:58'At least with him, I knew where I stood!'
0:19:23 > 0:19:24'Hi, Mum.'
0:19:25 > 0:19:27Yeah, you were right.
0:19:27 > 0:19:28Yeah, he's just got home.
0:19:30 > 0:19:33'I don't know what's wrong. He's just locked himself in the bedroom.'
0:19:34 > 0:19:36Um, can I come home?
0:19:38 > 0:19:42Yeah, um, I don't know how long for. A couple of weeks?
0:19:42 > 0:19:44Maybe more.
0:19:56 > 0:19:59Hi, um, I really need to see Dr Sharma.
0:20:01 > 0:20:03Thanks.
0:20:06 > 0:20:08I need your advice.
0:20:08 > 0:20:11I have told you before, ankle straps make your legs look shorter.
0:20:11 > 0:20:14No, not about shoes.
0:20:14 > 0:20:17Actual advice. This is about Ayesha, isn't it?
0:20:17 > 0:20:21Ayesha found the rug that I'd thrown in the bin.
0:20:21 > 0:20:25And of course, I lied and that has made everything worse.
0:20:25 > 0:20:28- You were only trying to protect her. - Exactly.
0:20:29 > 0:20:34Every time, she swears she won't be taken in by Bren, but she always is.
0:20:34 > 0:20:36- You were acting with the best of intentions.- I was.
0:20:36 > 0:20:39I mean, I can cope with her being angry, but now...
0:20:39 > 0:20:41Now, she's living with her.
0:20:41 > 0:20:44I can put your mind at rest on that subject.
0:20:44 > 0:20:46She's moving in with Al.
0:20:47 > 0:20:49Al?
0:20:49 > 0:20:51That's a whole other story.
0:20:51 > 0:20:53Good intentions aside, you should have known better.
0:20:53 > 0:20:56How long have you been a GP?
0:20:56 > 0:20:59Addiction family dynamics can be a minefield.
0:20:59 > 0:21:01I know, I know.
0:21:01 > 0:21:02And it's not just that.
0:21:04 > 0:21:06She said something.
0:21:06 > 0:21:08She said I haven't got a maternal bone in my body.
0:21:09 > 0:21:12She was just angry.
0:21:12 > 0:21:13Maybe.
0:21:13 > 0:21:17But Chris has moved to Australia and I know he had his reasons,
0:21:17 > 0:21:19but do you think he was trying to get away from me?
0:21:21 > 0:21:24Your son is a complicated person
0:21:24 > 0:21:27and a credit to someone.
0:21:27 > 0:21:29Why can't that someone be you?
0:21:41 > 0:21:43So, do you want to tell me what's happened?
0:21:46 > 0:21:48Um, Casper's leaving me.
0:21:48 > 0:21:53And I shouldn't even try to stop him because he's right.
0:21:54 > 0:21:56I'm worse than Nathan.
0:21:56 > 0:22:00Nathan's Casper's ex-boyfriend who put him in hospital?
0:22:00 > 0:22:03In what way do you think that you're worse?
0:22:03 > 0:22:07When Casper moved in, he told me what Nathan did.
0:22:08 > 0:22:12How he tried to strangle him and crushed his windpipe.
0:22:13 > 0:22:15And...
0:22:16 > 0:22:19I couldn't stop thinking about it.
0:22:19 > 0:22:21I mean, I really couldn't.
0:22:23 > 0:22:26I keep seeing my hands around his throat.
0:22:26 > 0:22:28Your hands, not Nathan's?
0:22:28 > 0:22:32And um... And not just strangling him.
0:22:32 > 0:22:37Crushing and sometimes, when he's sleeping,
0:22:37 > 0:22:40I imagine picking up a pillow and pressing it down.
0:22:42 > 0:22:44- You want to kill him?- No.
0:22:45 > 0:22:48No, I just... I just think about it.
0:22:49 > 0:22:50And I can't stop.
0:22:50 > 0:22:53- All day, all night. - So you don't want to hurt him?
0:22:53 > 0:22:54No!
0:22:55 > 0:22:58So why do you think I can't sleep?
0:23:00 > 0:23:03Did you run away this morning because you wanted to hurt
0:23:03 > 0:23:06Casper or because you couldn't stop thinking about it?
0:23:06 > 0:23:09- What's the difference? - Well, there's a very big difference
0:23:09 > 0:23:12between having a thought, even an obsession, and acting on it.
0:23:14 > 0:23:16Have you ever hurt him?
0:23:16 > 0:23:20- Before? Or anyone?- No, but it's... It's in my mind.
0:23:21 > 0:23:24That's why you want sleeping pills?
0:23:24 > 0:23:28I just want one day, one night, without thinking.
0:23:29 > 0:23:32You want to block out your thoughts?
0:23:32 > 0:23:35Well, you had a crisis a few years ago where you couldn't leave
0:23:35 > 0:23:39the house, you kept checking and rechecking the door to see,
0:23:39 > 0:23:42- even though you knew it was already locked.- Yeah.
0:23:42 > 0:23:46- It's OCD.- Well, it's an irrational fear that you couldn't stop.
0:23:46 > 0:23:49Perhaps like the violent thoughts that are keeping you awake now.
0:23:51 > 0:23:54Repetitive violent thoughts are another side to OCD.
0:23:54 > 0:23:57People don't talk about it much, although they should.
0:23:57 > 0:24:00If they did, they'd understand that it can be managed and
0:24:00 > 0:24:02controlled just like their other symptoms.
0:24:02 > 0:24:05It's um... It's OCD?
0:24:05 > 0:24:07Very likely.
0:24:07 > 0:24:11I mean, we need to talk and make an assessment, but with time and
0:24:11 > 0:24:15treatment, you should be able to sleep and get your normal life back.
0:24:15 > 0:24:18So I'm um... I'm not crazy?
0:24:18 > 0:24:20No more than anyone else.
0:24:23 > 0:24:26I've... I've got to find Casper.
0:24:26 > 0:24:28I'm sorry, but he's leaving.
0:24:28 > 0:24:29Um...
0:24:29 > 0:24:31Thanks.
0:24:35 > 0:24:37We are really grateful for everything,
0:24:37 > 0:24:41but Heston's just got a bit flustered.
0:24:41 > 0:24:43Well, I just wanted to give you all the possible options.
0:24:43 > 0:24:45And we absolutely appreciate that.
0:24:45 > 0:24:48It's just, well, after the excitement of the proposal,
0:24:48 > 0:24:52I think we just want to keep things simple, so um, Heston is going to be
0:24:52 > 0:24:55in charge of the venue, I'm going to take care of my dress all by myself,
0:24:55 > 0:25:00and if you could just organise the flower arrangements, if that's OK?
0:25:00 > 0:25:05- Yes. Please, send my apologies to Dr Carter.- There's no need.
0:25:05 > 0:25:10- The hen party - I really do not feel qualified.- No, that's fine.
0:25:10 > 0:25:14I'll ask Zara or Emma. They won't mind.
0:25:14 > 0:25:18- I know I am the matron of honour, but...- Mrs Tembe, I...
0:25:18 > 0:25:20I asked you to be the matron of honour because you are my
0:25:20 > 0:25:23friend, not because you organise parties..
0:25:23 > 0:25:27- Right.- Right. So, can I have a look at the flower arrangements?- Oh, yes.
0:25:27 > 0:25:29- Shall we sit down?- Yes.
0:25:31 > 0:25:33- I've been trying to call you. - I've been busy.
0:25:33 > 0:25:36I'm all packed, my car's running, so I'll see you when you get home?
0:25:36 > 0:25:39- I'm not sure if I'm going to cook anything.- No, no. Don't cook.
0:25:39 > 0:25:42- We'll order something in. - You're a star, by the way.
0:25:44 > 0:25:46- There's no point regretting it now. - What?
0:25:47 > 0:25:49I never regret anything.
0:25:49 > 0:25:53Just I was commiserating with her, I wasn't offering.
0:25:53 > 0:25:55And yet somehow, she's got the impression...
0:25:55 > 0:25:58What are you going to do? Change the locks?
0:25:58 > 0:26:02No. No... I don't know.
0:26:02 > 0:26:06I'm not like you people. I enjoy my own personal space.
0:26:06 > 0:26:08Well, it might be kinder to mention it,
0:26:08 > 0:26:11just so that she knows that it's temporary.
0:26:12 > 0:26:14Ayesh!
0:26:20 > 0:26:21Casper!
0:26:21 > 0:26:23- Look... - I've got a bus to catch.- Wait.
0:26:23 > 0:26:27OK, um, I'm not seeing anyone else.
0:26:27 > 0:26:30OK? Um, Sharma, she's a doctor.
0:26:30 > 0:26:32That's who I was with this morning.
0:26:34 > 0:26:38Look, I'll explain everything. OK?
0:26:38 > 0:26:39I'm sorry.
0:26:39 > 0:26:42Please, I really, really am.
0:26:42 > 0:26:45Doctor? Are you all right?
0:26:54 > 0:26:56Sorry. I'm...hard to avoid, obviously.
0:26:56 > 0:26:58Obviously.
0:26:58 > 0:27:00Mr Hennigan. This way.
0:27:12 > 0:27:15Are you taking sides with a man who claims that MI5 is trying to
0:27:15 > 0:27:18infiltrate the nation's water supply?
0:27:18 > 0:27:20Al, look, his last blood test was invalid.
0:27:20 > 0:27:23He's fallen in love with someone who feels the same way.
0:27:23 > 0:27:26- Is that so terrible?- It didn't work so well for us, did it?
0:27:26 > 0:27:30- 'What do you want?'- I just fancied a chat with my husband.
0:27:30 > 0:27:32What's the point?