0:00:33 > 0:00:38HE SNORES
0:00:38 > 0:00:40Merry Christmas!
0:00:40 > 0:00:41Merry Christmas!
0:00:41 > 0:00:44- Let's see what Santa got us. - You're so slow, Morgan.
0:00:44 > 0:00:46No, I'm not.
0:00:46 > 0:00:49- This one's mine cos it says Tiffany! - This one's mine!
0:00:51 > 0:00:53Merry Christmas.
0:00:53 > 0:00:55I hope we haven't forgotten anything.
0:00:55 > 0:00:57Well, does it really matter?
0:00:57 > 0:00:59No.
0:00:59 > 0:01:03No. No hassle. No black envelopes from gutless stalkers.
0:01:03 > 0:01:07No fat friends pouring brandy cream down our throat.
0:01:07 > 0:01:10Today, is going to be a family day, Shirley, yeah?
0:01:12 > 0:01:15- Merry Christmas.- Merry Christmas.
0:01:17 > 0:01:20- Happy Christmas! - Yes, happy open house.
0:01:20 > 0:01:22Yeah, and party!
0:01:22 > 0:01:24My beautiful girls.
0:01:24 > 0:01:27- Oh, I can't wait. Now, have you sorted the music out?- Yes.
0:01:27 > 0:01:30I've got the drink, as well. The drinks will be flowing!
0:01:30 > 0:01:33I was the skateboarding champion of East London.
0:01:33 > 0:01:36Watch how good I am! Right, out the way!
0:01:36 > 0:01:37Oh, hello!
0:01:37 > 0:01:39THEY LAUGH
0:01:39 > 0:01:41You're up early, ain't you?
0:01:41 > 0:01:44Merry Christmas, buddy. You all right?
0:01:44 > 0:01:47- Merry Christmas. - Merry Christmas.
0:01:47 > 0:01:50Oh, Janine, been helping Santa out(?)
0:01:50 > 0:01:54It's a commercial rip-off, Kat. Today's just like any other day.
0:01:54 > 0:01:56- Yeah, yeah. - Yeah, Merry Christmas, Scrooge!
0:01:56 > 0:01:59Come on, then. Right, you're cooking breakfast.
0:02:26 > 0:02:28We'll just do Christmas a bit later, yeah?
0:02:34 > 0:02:37Come on, then. We'll do it later, yeah?
0:02:49 > 0:02:52I tell you, I saw you kissing.
0:02:52 > 0:02:54And the first thing you do is write her a note?
0:02:58 > 0:03:00She's... She's scared of him.
0:03:00 > 0:03:04Well, she's an idiot. I'm an idiot. Us middle-aged women, eh?
0:03:04 > 0:03:08You'd think we'd be old enough to pick the right one by now. What can you do?
0:03:08 > 0:03:12- I'm... Jane, I'm...- What, Zainab can't just walk out the door?- No.
0:03:13 > 0:03:14Yusef...
0:03:14 > 0:03:18I don't care. I do not care, OK?
0:03:18 > 0:03:20The man is a lunatic, Jane!
0:03:22 > 0:03:26I will not lose my whole family on Christmas Day.
0:03:26 > 0:03:30I will not let that man just walk away with my son on Christmas Day.
0:03:32 > 0:03:35I seriously won't be able to go out in Karachi without a chaperone?
0:03:35 > 0:03:39That's not sexist, Afia, it's sensible.
0:03:39 > 0:03:43- Kamil has a better chance of following a map.- Oi!
0:03:43 > 0:03:46- When's Bushra bringing him back? - Laila's meeting us at the airport.
0:03:46 > 0:03:48Laila?
0:03:50 > 0:03:53You must get round to calling her, Zainab. Really...
0:03:53 > 0:03:56Sorry, who is Laila? Cos I don't know any Lailas.
0:03:56 > 0:04:00- Mum, why have you let him send my brother to live with a stranger? - And breathe.
0:04:00 > 0:04:02- No, Mum. - He's going to be scared, Yusef, OK?
0:04:02 > 0:04:06Laila's not a stranger. Please. We know Laila. Your wife knows Laila.
0:04:06 > 0:04:09- I do?- Your mother's dear friend, Salma. Her niece, Laila.
0:04:09 > 0:04:10You played together.
0:04:10 > 0:04:13Look, when Bushra was no longer available it made sense.
0:04:13 > 0:04:16- I didn't realise I had to run every decision by you.- That Laila.
0:04:16 > 0:04:20That's what happens when you call everyone Auntie.
0:04:20 > 0:04:23So, all goodbyes done by four o'clock and then back here for taxis.
0:04:23 > 0:04:26If that meets with your approval, Tamwar.
0:04:26 > 0:04:28Tambo, we'll see you in the Square later.
0:04:39 > 0:04:40Go.
0:04:42 > 0:04:44Go.
0:04:46 > 0:04:48Go and say goodbye to Masood.
0:04:48 > 0:04:51Kiss him. Tear his clothes off.
0:04:51 > 0:04:53I'm sorry, Yusef.
0:04:53 > 0:04:57That's what you want. That's what you do, isn't it?
0:05:10 > 0:05:13And then, you take the consequences.
0:05:21 > 0:05:23Oh, have some backbone, woman.
0:05:23 > 0:05:26Be a little bit honest, can you?
0:05:26 > 0:05:28A little bit brave.
0:05:34 > 0:05:36No.
0:05:36 > 0:05:37I won't go.
0:05:39 > 0:05:41I won't go with you.
0:05:43 > 0:05:45I won't go with you to Pakistan.
0:05:46 > 0:05:48Here, let's have a look.
0:05:53 > 0:05:55You said you didn't want nothing.
0:05:55 > 0:05:57No, there ain't nothing I want.
0:05:57 > 0:05:59Right. Well, I didn't get you nothing.
0:06:01 > 0:06:02Right.
0:06:10 > 0:06:12- Merry Christmas.- Merry Christmas.
0:06:13 > 0:06:17Every past Christmas I can remember,
0:06:17 > 0:06:20a whole bunch of relatives that you don't even like
0:06:20 > 0:06:23- and certainly don't want to spend any time with.- Yeah.
0:06:23 > 0:06:27- Tatty crackers...- Oh, crackers. - Paper chains...
0:06:27 > 0:06:29Go on, yeah, yeah, crackers.
0:06:29 > 0:06:32And that fight over who's going to sit on the kitchen stool
0:06:32 > 0:06:34- and who got the pouffe. - Know that one.
0:06:34 > 0:06:35My Dad...
0:06:37 > 0:06:40For years, Ricky ate his Christmas dinner with his chin on the table.
0:06:40 > 0:06:45There is not one single thing that I miss about those Christmases when I was a kid.
0:06:45 > 0:06:49No? Sure? Except the magic, maybe?
0:06:49 > 0:06:52That warm glow?
0:06:52 > 0:06:53Feeling loved?
0:07:01 > 0:07:06I wanted socks. I'm happy with socks and a fairy but...
0:07:06 > 0:07:09- Can you put the head back on? - Can I have my birthday on Christmas Day?
0:07:09 > 0:07:13- Liam got a West Ham T-shirt. - Why don't we put that train track together?
0:07:13 > 0:07:15- Why's Whitney crying? - I'm sorry, all right?
0:07:15 > 0:07:18- I only got a train track. - Sorry I didn't come back loaded,
0:07:18 > 0:07:22- but all the bankers were on the other wing. - Will you all stop complaining!
0:07:26 > 0:07:29Sherry! Nice, big sherry. Who wants one?
0:07:29 > 0:07:30I ain't complaining.
0:07:30 > 0:07:34I am. I only got a train track and I wanted a bike.
0:07:34 > 0:07:36He ain't hit me for a week in case the elves saw.
0:07:36 > 0:07:40I just thought us all being together would do it, you know?
0:07:40 > 0:07:42Right, get your gob around that.
0:07:44 > 0:07:46For God's sake. Not you and all, Whit.
0:07:46 > 0:07:48They're from Ryan.
0:07:48 > 0:07:51They're really nice. I said he wouldn't forget you.
0:07:51 > 0:07:53That's what you've got to learn -
0:07:53 > 0:07:56it's the thought that counts, not the price of your presents.
0:07:56 > 0:08:00When I was little, we were lucky to get an apple and an orange.
0:08:00 > 0:08:02- Why?- No-one liked her much.
0:08:02 > 0:08:06THEY LAUGH I'm glad you're home, Mum.
0:08:06 > 0:08:10- I'm glad you're home and all. - Are you? I was starting to wonder.
0:08:10 > 0:08:13- Come on.- Come on, Morgan.
0:08:19 > 0:08:20Relax, you're paying.
0:08:20 > 0:08:23The trouble I had trying to max out your credit card.
0:08:42 > 0:08:44I don't want to go.
0:08:44 > 0:08:48When we get to Pakistan, Zainab, things will be easier, clearer.
0:08:48 > 0:08:50You're not listening.
0:08:50 > 0:08:53You know, Tamwar was right.
0:08:53 > 0:08:57- Sending Kamil away was very harsh. Most mothers wouldn't let it happen. - I didn't do that.
0:08:57 > 0:08:59You didn't bring him home, did you?
0:08:59 > 0:09:01I love my baby, Yusef.
0:09:01 > 0:09:04And I know you'd do anything for him.
0:09:04 > 0:09:05I believe you.
0:09:07 > 0:09:09I know you won't leave him alone.
0:09:15 > 0:09:16Such a small child...
0:09:19 > 0:09:20..such a big airport,
0:09:20 > 0:09:26such a great, big place, Pakistan.
0:09:46 > 0:09:50- I love every single present.- Yeah?
0:09:55 > 0:09:59Oh, come on, Janine. This is obscene.
0:09:59 > 0:10:02All this stuff that we got, this stuff! It's Christmas Day.
0:10:02 > 0:10:04Do you know what we need?
0:10:04 > 0:10:06Poor people.
0:10:06 > 0:10:11Charity, Michael? Please, come on. We're eating.
0:10:11 > 0:10:15Come on, none of this don't mean anything.
0:10:15 > 0:10:18Unless you can gloat about it.
0:10:24 > 0:10:25Don't let them boil over.
0:10:27 > 0:10:29You got too much skin on them carrots
0:10:29 > 0:10:31and don't forget the parsnips.
0:10:31 > 0:10:35How many times in ten minutes can one woman say the word "parsnip"?
0:10:35 > 0:10:37Apparently 14.
0:10:37 > 0:10:40Shirley, look. Parsnips. I have not forgot the parsnips.
0:10:40 > 0:10:45- Yeah, but are you going to put the parsnips in the oven today? - Oh, Shirley, Shirley.
0:10:45 > 0:10:49I am a grown woman. And actually, I have handled the odd root vegetable.
0:10:49 > 0:10:51THEY LAUGH
0:10:51 > 0:10:55- I'm a mother. I'm a mother, actually.- Not so you'd notice, eh?
0:10:56 > 0:10:57That's 1-1.
0:10:57 > 0:11:02- No. No, no, no. It's Christmas. - Yeah, yeah, it's Christmas.
0:11:02 > 0:11:05We are going to have good fun, aren't we?
0:11:05 > 0:11:07Cos we do. We do have a laugh, don't we?
0:11:07 > 0:11:10Yeah, too right. Look at me. Oh, my sides, my sides(!)
0:11:10 > 0:11:12Don't forget the parsnips!
0:11:12 > 0:11:17- SHE SCREAMS - Yes, and I won't pretend that I'm counting down the minutes
0:11:17 > 0:11:19till I can pick up my Amy.
0:11:19 > 0:11:22And you, right? You don't come over all Miss Bossy with me
0:11:22 > 0:11:25because your old man didn't buy you a present.
0:11:25 > 0:11:272-1, Jay.
0:11:29 > 0:11:32Put the parsnips in the oven!
0:11:32 > 0:11:35Happy face, Shirley. Happy face.
0:11:38 > 0:11:39No?
0:11:39 > 0:11:44OK. Listen. You keep at it with the Wicked Witch Of The West routine
0:11:44 > 0:11:47and it's not just going to be Heather and your kids missing,
0:11:47 > 0:11:51but you are going to be eating these rotten Christmas parsnips
0:11:51 > 0:11:53on your tod!
0:12:02 > 0:12:06THEY LAUGH
0:12:06 > 0:12:08I'll put them in the oven now, OK?
0:12:23 > 0:12:25Course, we could always have pizza.
0:12:27 > 0:12:30It's years since I saw Laila. I was just a little girl.
0:12:30 > 0:12:33- I know this looks like overreacting. - Just give me the address, Afia.
0:12:33 > 0:12:35But he does have the right to see Kamil.
0:12:35 > 0:12:38So why doesn't he just ask my Dad for it?
0:12:38 > 0:12:40- Because your Dad's a raving head case.- You what?
0:12:40 > 0:12:42When he says head case...
0:12:42 > 0:12:45What would you call snatching my son against my wishes?
0:12:45 > 0:12:47How dare you, Masood?
0:12:47 > 0:12:49OK. All right, time out. Festive cheer.
0:12:49 > 0:12:53No, it's not my dad's fault your marriage failed and you don't know where your kid is.
0:12:53 > 0:12:56Head case? Why don't you look in the mirror?
0:12:56 > 0:12:58Steady on.
0:12:58 > 0:13:01Just, please, tell me where my son is, Afia.
0:13:01 > 0:13:04I was just a little girl.
0:13:05 > 0:13:07I don't remember Laila's address.
0:13:09 > 0:13:10Oi.
0:13:10 > 0:13:15Oh, you idiot! Go away. Just go away.
0:13:15 > 0:13:16I've got something for you.
0:13:16 > 0:13:19A bunch of wilted flowers you got from the garage?
0:13:19 > 0:13:22Happy Christmas and all that? Go stick them up your Khyber.
0:13:22 > 0:13:25I never said I forked out cash on you, did I?
0:13:32 > 0:13:34If I could just ask Jack...
0:13:34 > 0:13:36Excuse me, mate. Let me get this straight.
0:13:36 > 0:13:38You got no leads, you got no addresses
0:13:38 > 0:13:40and you got no names, yeah?
0:13:40 > 0:13:43- No, we do have a name. - Yes, thank you, love. Thank you.
0:13:43 > 0:13:46So, you thought... I mean, obvious move. You thought,
0:13:46 > 0:13:50I can't find my son, so I know what I'll do - I'll go round the ex-cop's house,
0:13:50 > 0:13:53and smash the granny out of his front door on Christmas Day.
0:13:53 > 0:13:55Jack might be able to suggest something.
0:13:55 > 0:13:57That's all you're after - a suggestion?
0:13:57 > 0:14:00Well, I suggest that if you've lost your little boy,
0:14:00 > 0:14:03you should've hung on to him in the first place, shouldn't you, eh?
0:14:03 > 0:14:05Merry Christmas.
0:14:06 > 0:14:07Sweetheart.
0:14:20 > 0:14:23Phil said you wouldn't say sorry.
0:14:23 > 0:14:25He said you never say sorry.
0:14:26 > 0:14:28Mrs Branning understands.
0:14:30 > 0:14:34She says it's tradition for the women round here
0:14:34 > 0:14:38and that Phil's probably chosen someone just like his mother.
0:14:39 > 0:14:41That's what she says.
0:14:41 > 0:14:44Who else you been bad mouthing me to?
0:14:47 > 0:14:51She said I had to make a choice.
0:14:54 > 0:14:58To hold on to those who are important...
0:15:01 > 0:15:05..or to hang out for one little word.
0:15:10 > 0:15:12So...
0:15:14 > 0:15:16..it doesn't matter, Shirl.
0:15:17 > 0:15:21It doesn't matter that you thought that I'd send hate mail
0:15:21 > 0:15:23or hurt the Mitchells cos I didn't do it.
0:15:27 > 0:15:28And you...
0:15:29 > 0:15:31..George...
0:15:32 > 0:15:34..maybe Andrew, one day.
0:15:34 > 0:15:37I mean, you're my family, aren't you?
0:15:38 > 0:15:42I don't want to spend a Christmas Day without my family.
0:15:47 > 0:15:49So...
0:15:51 > 0:15:53..you don't have to be sorry.
0:15:54 > 0:15:58You don't have to say sorry, even.
0:16:00 > 0:16:04I won't mind any more, OK?
0:16:04 > 0:16:06I didn't do it, Shirl.
0:16:08 > 0:16:09OK.
0:16:15 > 0:16:17I'm sorry, Hev.
0:16:17 > 0:16:20SHE SOBS
0:16:30 > 0:16:33We're the only normal people, is what I'm saying, OK?
0:16:33 > 0:16:36Your dad's a nutter, my dad's a nutter,
0:16:36 > 0:16:39so, statistically, we're the only points of sanity
0:16:39 > 0:16:42in a very mental world.
0:16:44 > 0:16:46- I need a wee.- See? Nothing wrong with being truthful.
0:16:46 > 0:16:49Which is one of the qualities I admire about you.
0:16:51 > 0:16:53I really don't remember Laila's address.
0:16:53 > 0:16:55Honestly, I can't remember it.
0:16:55 > 0:16:58OK, let's go and say bye to Fats, we'll have one of Dot's mince pies.
0:16:58 > 0:17:01Let's not argue, OK?
0:17:01 > 0:17:03Just wrack your brain while you're there.
0:17:03 > 0:17:07It's got to be breaking Dad's heart not to say bye to Kamil.
0:17:10 > 0:17:13Who's arguing? I mean, I didn't start it, so...
0:17:13 > 0:17:15No, course you didn't, my little chicken korma.
0:17:15 > 0:17:17Perish the thought.
0:17:17 > 0:17:20- Go on, open mine.- OK, look at this one, this is for you.
0:17:20 > 0:17:24- What's in the box? What's in the box? What's in the box? - Mine, mine, mine!
0:17:24 > 0:17:27- You're so wicked! You're so wicked. - Open this one, man.
0:17:27 > 0:17:31- This is my one, now. - How come you get all the big ones?
0:17:31 > 0:17:33HORN HONKS
0:17:37 > 0:17:39Coming through!
0:17:41 > 0:17:43Hey, look. Two feet!
0:17:43 > 0:17:46Alfie, can you stop playing and be a grown up?
0:17:46 > 0:17:50- It's not even your present. - I'm good at this! I'm coming. Wait for me, hold on.
0:17:52 > 0:17:53Why can't it be?
0:17:53 > 0:17:57Because bailiff's don't bring stuff in, they take it out.
0:17:57 > 0:17:58It's a bike!
0:18:00 > 0:18:02Bike! Bike! Bike!
0:18:04 > 0:18:06She just sort of remembered. It might not be right
0:18:06 > 0:18:10cos we were arguing and Afia was having a wee...
0:18:10 > 0:18:12- The details don't matter. - Finborough Street.
0:18:12 > 0:18:15Dad, we leave here at four o'clock.
0:18:15 > 0:18:19HE WHISTLES
0:18:22 > 0:18:23Anyone got an eye on the time?
0:18:23 > 0:18:27- I don't get why we have to have your brothers round here, anyway? - Urgh!
0:18:27 > 0:18:30Why is there a nail in the stuffing?
0:18:30 > 0:18:33Because I asked for Shellac and you bought me stick on which fall off.
0:18:33 > 0:18:35Get them out, will you?
0:18:35 > 0:18:37Well, I asked for music and you got me One Direction.
0:18:37 > 0:18:39You love them.
0:18:39 > 0:18:41No, you love them.
0:18:41 > 0:18:45Lauren, Operation Turkey, yeah? Phase two.
0:18:45 > 0:18:47Dad said fish them out, Abi. Go on.
0:18:47 > 0:18:49Oh, my God, Lauren.
0:18:49 > 0:18:53- I am actually setting here. With glitter. - No, sitting on your lard bum.
0:18:53 > 0:18:56Just because your jeggings make your thighs look like sausages.
0:18:56 > 0:19:00Oi! Take that back, Wobble Woman.
0:19:00 > 0:19:02You want the truth? You've both got fat bums.
0:19:02 > 0:19:06- BOTH: What?! - Can we both pull our weight, please?
0:19:06 > 0:19:08Awww, did Daddy buy you a forklift?
0:19:08 > 0:19:13Abi, no plastic, no glue and no food poisoning, all right?
0:19:13 > 0:19:15Unless it's your Nan.
0:19:16 > 0:19:20I just don't get why SHE has to make such a massive deal, that is all.
0:19:20 > 0:19:23Because this might be Mum's last Christmas ever, Abi. That's why.
0:19:44 > 0:19:47We'd better make sure it's a good one, then, eh?
0:19:51 > 0:19:55You cooking that or giving it a makeover?
0:19:55 > 0:19:57It's a long flight...
0:20:01 > 0:20:03..and this is such a good day.
0:20:05 > 0:20:07Don't spoil it now.
0:20:11 > 0:20:13I don't want to see you sad.
0:20:15 > 0:20:17Sleep.
0:20:18 > 0:20:19Kamil.
0:20:19 > 0:20:22Thank you!
0:20:22 > 0:20:24- It's definitely on this side. - What?
0:20:24 > 0:20:27- It's definitely on this side. - Right, there's no-one in there.
0:20:27 > 0:20:31- And you will be better than you are, yes?- Yes.
0:21:08 > 0:21:09Come on!
0:21:16 > 0:21:20Hello, sorry to bother you. I know it's Christmas Day, but...
0:21:50 > 0:21:52Tiff, look at my bike!
0:21:54 > 0:21:56INAUDIBLE CONVERSATION
0:22:04 > 0:22:05Woah!
0:22:05 > 0:22:07Oh, look at her little face!
0:22:07 > 0:22:10Oh, this'll be nice for the office(!)
0:22:10 > 0:22:13See it's your class that I've always admired, Janine.
0:22:13 > 0:22:16You really shouldn't have bothered.
0:22:16 > 0:22:19I've gone three miles!
0:22:19 > 0:22:22No, she means it. You shouldn't have bothered.
0:22:22 > 0:22:25- Technically she didn't, so... - Well, you're all very welcome.
0:22:25 > 0:22:27You can always go on a diet, Pat.
0:22:27 > 0:22:31Bianca, you can always sell that online
0:22:31 > 0:22:33and just buy yourself something fake.
0:22:33 > 0:22:34Thank you.
0:22:39 > 0:22:43Oh, I get it! She wants to be invited to dinner!
0:22:43 > 0:22:46- Yeah! Can she, please? - Yeah, come on, Janine.
0:22:46 > 0:22:50Well, maybe if it's going to make you lot feel better.
0:22:50 > 0:22:51Ah, bless you, Janine(!)
0:22:51 > 0:22:56You trying to buy your way back into your own family, are you?
0:22:56 > 0:22:58- No. - Good, cos nobody's inviting you.
0:22:58 > 0:22:59Come here, Tiff.
0:22:59 > 0:23:03You know, Christmas is all about giving,
0:23:03 > 0:23:05and I just love it.
0:23:05 > 0:23:09I mean, we should do this every year in the future.
0:23:09 > 0:23:13Definitely. Thank you, poor old woman.
0:23:13 > 0:23:16It's been a pleasure patronising you.
0:23:19 > 0:23:23Well, what've you got? Let's have a look then.
0:23:23 > 0:23:25Actually, they look quite nice!
0:23:27 > 0:23:30- Laila? Are you Laila? - Yes?
0:23:30 > 0:23:31Ah! Jane!
0:23:31 > 0:23:36Look, I'm Masood. I'm Kamil's dad. I want my son, now.
0:23:36 > 0:23:39But you're dead. Yusef said that you're dead.
0:23:39 > 0:23:43YELLS: Do I look dead to you?! I want my son, now!
0:23:45 > 0:23:47- Kamil!- Dada!
0:23:47 > 0:23:49Move!
0:23:50 > 0:23:52Mind, mind! Make room!
0:23:52 > 0:23:56CHEERING AND LAUGHTER
0:23:56 > 0:24:00- So he give you fifty quid? - Yep, each.- Bargain!
0:24:00 > 0:24:02Yeah, well I only came for the dinner.
0:24:02 > 0:24:05Well, I ain't had time to go down the shops, have I?
0:24:05 > 0:24:08Right, where's the carving knife? Billy!
0:24:08 > 0:24:09You're going soft, you are.
0:24:09 > 0:24:13No, no. I am having a Merry Christmas with my whole family, son.
0:24:13 > 0:24:17Cos nothing and no-one stops me.
0:24:17 > 0:24:19So what's Heather getting for all the grief then, eh?
0:24:19 > 0:24:22Job for life and a grand in used fivers?
0:24:22 > 0:24:26Oh, no. Ain't nothing I want. Got everything here.
0:24:26 > 0:24:29I don't do female bouncers. But if you fancy it, call round the club.
0:24:29 > 0:24:31I might do that.
0:24:32 > 0:24:36- Billy!- Parsnips.- This turkey ain't going to carve itself.
0:24:36 > 0:24:38Not that anyone I know actually likes parsnips.
0:24:38 > 0:24:42Christmas Day wouldn't be Christmas Day without parsnips.
0:24:42 > 0:24:44- Would it, Shirl?- Dig in!
0:24:44 > 0:24:46I'll have some parsnips.
0:24:46 > 0:24:48What did they actually fall out over?
0:24:48 > 0:24:50- Oh, I don't know. Envelopes. - Envelopes?
0:24:50 > 0:24:54- It's on the draining board!- Where? - I've never had a nice parsnip.
0:24:54 > 0:24:55Whoever's hassling Dad
0:24:55 > 0:24:59tried to set up Hev with a load of black envelopes in her bag.
0:25:00 > 0:25:03OK, OK, OK.
0:25:03 > 0:25:07SHE SQUEALS
0:25:07 > 0:25:08Get on with it, will you?
0:25:08 > 0:25:10Ah!
0:25:10 > 0:25:12SHE SCREAMS
0:25:12 > 0:25:17She gave me half the cash and a 10% voucher.
0:25:18 > 0:25:21- You know me so well!- Yeah, I do.
0:25:21 > 0:25:25- Look, look, look!- Oh, yeah.- Woo!
0:25:25 > 0:25:28Rrr!
0:25:28 > 0:25:30Oh, thank you so much!
0:25:32 > 0:25:35Hey! I put in an order for a lovely dark, tall stranger.
0:25:35 > 0:25:38Is he down here? What is he? Self assemble or blow up?
0:25:38 > 0:25:42No, no. I'm sitting down right here!
0:25:44 > 0:25:47- Oh, look. That ain't fair, is it? - Oh, what's that?- Hey, D!
0:25:47 > 0:25:50Who do you know that's called Santa? Hm?
0:25:50 > 0:25:53Who?
0:25:53 > 0:25:55We ain't all ten years old, Kim.
0:25:55 > 0:25:58- Give it! - Well, maybe it's not yours then.
0:25:58 > 0:26:02- Probably a mistake.- Will you just... Patrick, will you tell her?
0:26:02 > 0:26:03That's my present!
0:26:03 > 0:26:05LAUGHTER
0:26:09 > 0:26:12Oh, children, children, children!
0:26:23 > 0:26:25DOOR CLICKS SOFTLY
0:26:41 > 0:26:42Ah!
0:27:30 > 0:27:33You overstepped the line! How many chances do you expect?
0:27:33 > 0:27:38- It's like being married to a child! - Let me go, please!
0:27:38 > 0:27:41All these years. All these lessons! And still you learn nothing?!
0:27:41 > 0:27:44Do I need to show the scars?
0:27:44 > 0:27:47Do you like the smell of burning?
0:27:47 > 0:27:50You know what you drive me to! What does it take, Zainab?
0:27:50 > 0:27:52A lit match in your face?
0:27:52 > 0:27:55I know that a husband does not torture his wife!
0:27:55 > 0:27:59I know he doesn't beat her down, I know he doesn't hurt her!
0:27:59 > 0:28:02- Take her baby and pretend it's her fault!- Torture?!
0:28:02 > 0:28:06That I tried to save you from that pathetic excuse of a man?!!
0:28:06 > 0:28:08You think this is torture?!
0:28:08 > 0:28:11You stupid, ugly, middle-aged woman!
0:28:11 > 0:28:14Wait till I get you back to Pakistan.
0:28:14 > 0:28:18I would rather die than go with you to Pakistan!
0:28:18 > 0:28:21Then that is your choice.
0:28:28 > 0:28:31- Ah!- Is that your choice?
0:28:33 > 0:28:36- Ah! - SHE SOBS
0:28:50 > 0:28:51Yes.
0:28:54 > 0:28:55Ah!
0:28:57 > 0:29:00- Hopefully I'll see you in a couple of weeks.- Tam!
0:29:15 > 0:29:18- ALL:- Merry Christmas!
0:29:36 > 0:29:38Laila. Bring me Kamil.
0:29:54 > 0:29:57Woo! There you go!
0:29:57 > 0:30:02We did it! Phew!
0:30:02 > 0:30:04Zainab? Zainab! I've got him!
0:30:04 > 0:30:06I've got Kamil!
0:30:17 > 0:30:19Thank you, God. Thank you, God.
0:30:19 > 0:30:22Allah ka shukrar. Thank you, God.
0:30:26 > 0:30:30Good boy. Come on.
0:30:32 > 0:30:35HAMMERING ON DOOR
0:30:35 > 0:30:37Zainab!!
0:30:37 > 0:30:42I will not disobey you. I will not disrespect you.
0:30:45 > 0:30:47You will not shame me. Say it! Say it!
0:30:47 > 0:30:48Ah!
0:30:48 > 0:30:50Masood has Kamil!
0:30:50 > 0:30:52I'm too late.
0:30:52 > 0:30:55Yusef!
0:30:55 > 0:30:59Masood has Kamil!
0:30:59 > 0:31:01WILD LAUGHTER
0:31:01 > 0:31:05So, come on, Yusef! Hit me now!
0:31:05 > 0:31:10Hit me now! Let's see what kind of man you really are.
0:31:11 > 0:31:12Because now...
0:31:12 > 0:31:17Now you'll have to bow down in Mosque.
0:31:17 > 0:31:20You will have to answer to God!
0:31:20 > 0:31:24You sad, pathetic, revolting...
0:31:24 > 0:31:25Get off me! Get off me!
0:31:27 > 0:31:31Shame? You dare use that word to me? You talk about shame?
0:31:31 > 0:31:33When you can do this?
0:31:33 > 0:31:35This, to your own wife!?
0:31:36 > 0:31:38Look at me. Look at me, Yusef!
0:31:38 > 0:31:41Look what you've done to me.
0:31:42 > 0:31:44You've destroyed my life!
0:31:44 > 0:31:48Why, Yusef? Why?!
0:31:48 > 0:31:52You are an evil, deranged man.
0:31:52 > 0:31:55You're sick!
0:31:55 > 0:31:59You're a sick, sick, sick man!
0:31:59 > 0:32:01SCREAMING: I hate you! You're a sick man!
0:32:10 > 0:32:11Yes...
0:32:14 > 0:32:15Yes, you're right.
0:32:20 > 0:32:21I'll go.
0:32:29 > 0:32:31Go on, Hev!
0:32:31 > 0:32:34- LAUGHTER - Whoa!
0:32:39 > 0:32:40Come on, mate!
0:32:40 > 0:32:43Who's next, who's next? Phil?
0:32:43 > 0:32:45Come on.
0:32:45 > 0:32:47Come on then. What have I got to be scared of, eh?
0:32:47 > 0:32:51- I'll wipe the floor with you, son. - Yeah, right!
0:32:51 > 0:32:55- LAUGHTER - Faster!
0:33:02 > 0:33:04'No more stolen cars, no more cut and shuts.
0:33:04 > 0:33:07'What do you want to do, get somebody else killed?
0:33:07 > 0:33:11'Do you seriously think I'm going to risk that again, eh?
0:33:11 > 0:33:13- 'Well, you gave them to Kevin. - Yeah.'
0:33:13 > 0:33:14Oh, my...
0:33:14 > 0:33:16'Yeah, look how he ended up.'
0:33:16 > 0:33:18This is a joke, innit?
0:33:18 > 0:33:20'..thought maybe I could shift a few.
0:33:20 > 0:33:23'Just till I've found my feet, got things ticking over.
0:33:23 > 0:33:26'Do you seriously think I'm going to risk that again, eh?
0:33:26 > 0:33:28'No more stolen cars, no more cut and shuts.
0:33:28 > 0:33:31'What do you want to do, get somebody else killed?
0:33:31 > 0:33:33'Get somebody else killed?'
0:33:33 > 0:33:35Phil Mitchell killed Kevin.
0:33:49 > 0:33:51Let's hope we get some better gags this time, OK?
0:33:51 > 0:33:53Ready? One, two, three. Go!
0:33:53 > 0:33:56- CHEERING - Tommy, what did you get?
0:33:56 > 0:34:00Right, who's got the first gag then? Who's got the first joke?
0:34:00 > 0:34:03- Right, what do you call two robbers? - I don't know. What do you say?
0:34:03 > 0:34:04A pair of knickers!
0:34:04 > 0:34:09- LAUGHTER - What les in a pram and wobbles...? - Hide them under your mash.
0:34:11 > 0:34:14No-one'll know.
0:34:14 > 0:34:15..I'll tell you who it is.
0:34:15 > 0:34:20It's baby Tommy! Good one, Tommy!
0:34:20 > 0:34:22THEY SHOUT
0:34:32 > 0:34:37- CHEERING - Hang on, hang on, hang on.
0:34:37 > 0:34:39You're a cheat!
0:34:39 > 0:34:42LAUGHTER
0:34:42 > 0:34:43Call the Police.
0:34:43 > 0:34:46Mas, they've gone.
0:34:46 > 0:34:48Jane.
0:34:54 > 0:34:56Christian'll be waiting.
0:35:03 > 0:35:05Jane...
0:35:06 > 0:35:08Merry Christmas.
0:35:10 > 0:35:12Merry Christmas, Masood.
0:35:13 > 0:35:15Mummy?
0:35:36 > 0:35:39HE HUMS
0:35:46 > 0:35:48It's you, isn't it?
0:35:49 > 0:35:52Afia, do we really have to get involved in some minor marital
0:35:52 > 0:35:55between your fascist father and my hysterical mum?
0:35:55 > 0:35:59I mean, you know, normal? We're just trying to keep it normal, OK?
0:35:59 > 0:36:01He's my dad, Tam.
0:36:03 > 0:36:05He's the one that took me shopping.
0:36:05 > 0:36:08He's the one that helped me with my homework.
0:36:08 > 0:36:10And I could never,
0:36:10 > 0:36:13never betray him.
0:36:13 > 0:36:16And he told me it was all in the past, so...
0:36:19 > 0:36:20What...what did he say?
0:36:24 > 0:36:28What if there's something wrong with him?
0:36:32 > 0:36:34He wouldn't do it again.
0:36:36 > 0:36:38He would NOT do it again.
0:36:38 > 0:36:42Do what? What, Afia? Afia, do what?
0:36:42 > 0:36:45I'm starting to get a bit freaked out here. What?
0:36:50 > 0:36:51He set fire to your mum.
0:36:54 > 0:36:57Nobody knew about those envelopes in Hev's bag.
0:36:59 > 0:37:01Except me,
0:37:01 > 0:37:03your Dad
0:37:03 > 0:37:04and Heather...
0:37:06 > 0:37:09..and the person that put them there.
0:37:11 > 0:37:14Answer the question, Ben.
0:37:14 > 0:37:16Zainab Mas...Khan.
0:37:19 > 0:37:21Zainab Khan.
0:37:22 > 0:37:24No.
0:37:24 > 0:37:25Please!
0:37:25 > 0:37:29Look, I just need to know if she's checked in.
0:37:29 > 0:37:31Because she's in danger.
0:37:42 > 0:37:45I don't care where you go.
0:37:45 > 0:37:47I don't care what you do.
0:37:48 > 0:37:49Yes.
0:37:51 > 0:37:53But you will be gone
0:37:53 > 0:37:56when I come back, to my home.
0:37:58 > 0:38:01MY home, with MY baby.
0:38:04 > 0:38:05Yes.
0:38:11 > 0:38:14Please don't just leave.
0:38:14 > 0:38:17Please!
0:38:17 > 0:38:20Please. If you really want it over.
0:38:24 > 0:38:28You see I didn't get to say goodbye and it still haunts me...
0:38:28 > 0:38:30Goodbye, Yusef.
0:38:30 > 0:38:33She was the love of my life, Zainab.
0:38:35 > 0:38:38I'm not sick.
0:38:38 > 0:38:43I'm not ill. I am just so very sad.
0:38:46 > 0:38:48I've done it wrong again.
0:38:49 > 0:38:52And I'm going to be on my own again.
0:38:55 > 0:38:59- And I'm so scared. - You have a daughter.
0:39:04 > 0:39:08You were the first time I truly smiled in such a long time...
0:39:08 > 0:39:11The empty space. The empty bed...
0:39:15 > 0:39:17And then there you were.
0:39:19 > 0:39:21It was like that first day, wasn't it?
0:39:23 > 0:39:31- Both of us so shy, you remember?- No. - No, you do...
0:39:34 > 0:39:37Please, please, don't leave me again. Please.
0:39:37 > 0:39:44No. No...
0:39:47 > 0:39:53You do not beat me to stop yourself from feeling sad, Yusef...
0:39:57 > 0:39:59I will not give you my family
0:39:59 > 0:40:01because you did not build one of your own.
0:40:01 > 0:40:06I will not share my bed with you because I am better than nothing.
0:40:07 > 0:40:11Because you're lonely. Because you're lonely?!
0:40:14 > 0:40:16I know that is your choice now.
0:40:20 > 0:40:26And I will not let you take Masood's life because you don't like yours.
0:40:33 > 0:40:34You can't stop me.
0:40:41 > 0:40:45It's Christmas. What were you thinking?
0:40:45 > 0:40:50It's Christmas, you messed up ungrateful little boy.
0:40:50 > 0:40:53And it's the first time in months I've seen your dad smile.
0:40:53 > 0:40:56The first time that he ain't looking over his shoulder,
0:40:56 > 0:40:59or jumping every time the letter box goes.
0:40:59 > 0:41:03And you'd do that to him. Why did you do it?
0:41:05 > 0:41:09- I'm sorry. - No. No, I don't want to know. I don't want to hear it.
0:41:09 > 0:41:11I don't even want to look at your face.
0:41:11 > 0:41:14Tell it to your dad, Ben.
0:41:14 > 0:41:16No, no, Shirl. I'm sorry, all right.
0:41:16 > 0:41:19I don't know why, but it's stopped, hasn't it?
0:41:20 > 0:41:22I don't want him hitting me.
0:41:23 > 0:41:28And then he'll throw me out, it's Christmas and I'll be on my own.
0:41:30 > 0:41:34It's just... I wouldn't hit him back.
0:41:34 > 0:41:38I wouldn't hit my dad, but I wanted to hit him back!
0:41:42 > 0:41:43Your dad has never hurt you.
0:41:48 > 0:41:50I want you to pack.
0:41:50 > 0:41:54Once Christmas is over, I want YOU to go on a very long holiday.
0:41:54 > 0:41:56And I don't even want a postcard from you.
0:41:56 > 0:41:57Shirl, it's stopped.
0:42:16 > 0:42:20Who would do this? Christmas Day?
0:42:21 > 0:42:26We need to... I've got a list...
0:42:28 > 0:42:32- Mince pies... - We're still not having open house!
0:42:32 > 0:42:34- Oh, yes.- What?
0:42:34 > 0:42:36We know he's a dangerous man.
0:42:36 > 0:42:39There's no harm in taking time, thinking this through.
0:42:41 > 0:42:43- Patrick, are you serious?- Yeah.
0:42:43 > 0:42:47- You really want to go ahead with this?- Yeah.
0:42:50 > 0:42:54You sit up with Abi then, darling. Go on.
0:42:54 > 0:42:57Right, that's it, everyone, sitting up.
0:42:57 > 0:42:59Don't matter where.
0:42:59 > 0:43:01Course it don't matter where we sit, eh?
0:43:01 > 0:43:03But, Derek, if you're head of the family,
0:43:03 > 0:43:07you sit at the head of the table, don't you?
0:43:07 > 0:43:10- What you talking about? It's my house.- It's tradition, Max.
0:43:10 > 0:43:13Like the Queen and cranberry sauce.
0:43:13 > 0:43:15Oh! I'll get it.
0:43:15 > 0:43:18Nan, no-one cares where they sit except Oscar.
0:43:18 > 0:43:21- You see what I mean, Derek? - Yeah, well...
0:43:21 > 0:43:24That's what's wrong with this country.
0:43:24 > 0:43:27- No respect for tradition. - Oh, here we go, see.
0:43:27 > 0:43:29First religion, then politics, the royal family.
0:43:29 > 0:43:33Christmas is not Christmas without a heated debate, is it, Mum?
0:43:33 > 0:43:36Amy. Away from the window. Come and sit here.
0:43:36 > 0:43:38- I blame the Government. - Yeah, course you do.
0:43:38 > 0:43:41- DOORBELL - Lauren, get your nan some water.
0:43:41 > 0:43:42Get a gag while you're there.
0:43:42 > 0:43:45My mum has married him. I let her. I lived in the same house as him.
0:43:45 > 0:43:47I promised my dad...
0:43:47 > 0:43:49We're going on holiday, Afia, to Pakistan,
0:43:49 > 0:43:53with a man who sets fire to people when things don't go his way.
0:43:53 > 0:43:54You kept that a secret from me?
0:44:00 > 0:44:03- My daughter wants a puppet. - My daughter wants her dinner. - I promised.
0:44:03 > 0:44:07- I'll give it to her. - Jack, you promised! - I've changed my mind.
0:44:28 > 0:44:30- Zainab knows though... - Just stop talking.
0:44:30 > 0:44:33- She chose to be with him. - Stop explaining everything as well.
0:44:33 > 0:44:35She's a grown woman. A strong woman!
0:44:35 > 0:44:39Afia, just stop with the excuses. Stop wasting time, OK?
0:44:39 > 0:44:40It's about the truth.
0:44:40 > 0:44:42What happened about telling the truth?
0:44:42 > 0:44:45If you want to walk away with any credibility,
0:44:45 > 0:44:48do what you could have done a few weeks ago and call the police.
0:44:50 > 0:44:53Dad... Yeah, Dad, just meet me at the house, OK.
0:44:53 > 0:44:55Meet me at the house. Mum's in trouble.
0:44:55 > 0:44:57Just meet me at the house.
0:45:00 > 0:45:03Your smirking, smug little Masood, he was always an irrelevance.
0:45:05 > 0:45:07And doesn't he know it?
0:45:11 > 0:45:14Maybe the postman knew it was only a matter of time
0:45:14 > 0:45:16before you looked at me and realised.
0:45:18 > 0:45:19And then you did.
0:45:22 > 0:45:26A little bit of guidance and you realised.
0:45:30 > 0:45:33How does that make me sick? Really, Zainab?
0:45:36 > 0:45:37I know I am the doctor,
0:45:37 > 0:45:40but you cannot be so squeamish, Zainab.
0:45:42 > 0:45:43It might hurt.
0:45:45 > 0:45:48But when a tumour is growing, you remove it.
0:45:48 > 0:45:51For the good of the whole.
0:45:52 > 0:45:54Oh, come on, please.
0:45:56 > 0:46:00I've always been able to talk to you, honestly.
0:46:00 > 0:46:01You and me.
0:46:04 > 0:46:08And when the tragedy of the accident is over...
0:46:10 > 0:46:13..you'll understand.
0:46:15 > 0:46:16I'll help you.
0:46:16 > 0:46:21- HIGH-PITCHED:- Where is Amy, the Christmas princess?
0:46:21 > 0:46:25Where is she? There she is. Hello, Amy!
0:46:25 > 0:46:27Amy!
0:46:27 > 0:46:32- ROXY GIGGLES - # Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells Jingle all the way
0:46:32 > 0:46:38# Oh, what fun it is to ride On a one horse open sleigh, hey!
0:46:38 > 0:46:42# Jingle bells, jingle bells Jingle all the way... #
0:46:46 > 0:46:50When you wake up, it'll all be over.
0:46:53 > 0:46:56Fear can be conquered when you're not on your own.
0:46:59 > 0:47:05You and me, we will sit in the sunshine, that is the plan.
0:47:06 > 0:47:09We will tell this to our grandchildren.
0:47:09 > 0:47:11How it was always going to be.
0:47:14 > 0:47:19You and me, Zainab, in the sunshine.
0:47:23 > 0:47:26Mum? Mum?!
0:47:26 > 0:47:29Dad!
0:47:33 > 0:47:37- Dad!- Mum! - Dad, what are you doing?
0:47:37 > 0:47:38Get away from her. Get off of her!
0:47:38 > 0:47:41Get the kids out of here. Call the police.
0:47:41 > 0:47:43Mum, what has he done to you?
0:47:43 > 0:47:45Dad, call the police.
0:47:45 > 0:47:47- I'll call them.- No!
0:47:47 > 0:47:53Wise. They'll hardly be interested in a little postman's domestic.
0:47:56 > 0:47:58- No!- Dad!
0:48:01 > 0:48:03Now call them.
0:48:06 > 0:48:09Sometimes people, their bodies get a bit poorly, you know,
0:48:09 > 0:48:10like a limp or whatever.
0:48:10 > 0:48:13Well, sometimes their minds do as well.
0:48:13 > 0:48:16Her mind's limping?
0:48:18 > 0:48:20Well, yeah, sometimes.
0:48:21 > 0:48:24But, you know, Jean, right, she misses her daughter.
0:48:24 > 0:48:26And she misses her granddaughter.
0:48:26 > 0:48:28You understand that, don't you, eh?
0:48:30 > 0:48:32Can she still dance with a limp?
0:48:32 > 0:48:35What?
0:48:35 > 0:48:38She don't want turkey. And she doesn't want her pudding.
0:48:38 > 0:48:45And if she don't get that puppet, she ain't going to come home. So, go on then.
0:48:48 > 0:48:50Hello, baby girl! Hello, baby.
0:48:55 > 0:48:57Keys to the flat.
0:48:57 > 0:49:02- I ain't having her hanging out with that inbred cousin of yours. All right?- OK.
0:49:02 > 0:49:07Merry Christmas, baby girl. Merry Christmas.
0:49:30 > 0:49:32We're just outside.
0:49:32 > 0:49:35He's got ten minutes and the police are coming to lock him up.
0:49:35 > 0:49:37We're just outside.
0:49:51 > 0:49:53You need me.
0:49:56 > 0:49:59Who else is going to find you when you get lost in Karachi?
0:49:59 > 0:50:03And pay off your overdraft and make you beans on toast
0:50:03 > 0:50:05when your homework gets too much.
0:50:08 > 0:50:11People are complicated. Life gets complicated.
0:50:11 > 0:50:15But you've got to understand, I will always be there for you.
0:50:15 > 0:50:18This is just one small moment in our lives.
0:50:18 > 0:50:22And we will not let Masood triumph. This is not an end, Afia.
0:50:28 > 0:50:29Yes, it is.
0:51:21 > 0:51:23CAR ALARM BLARES
0:51:28 > 0:51:31- KAT:- 'I'd do Christmas every day if I had a dishwasher.
0:51:31 > 0:51:34- 'Those kids this morning. - JEAN: Don't say anything,
0:51:34 > 0:51:38'but I'm going to get Alfie a skateboard for his birthday.
0:51:40 > 0:51:42'How lucky am I?
0:51:42 > 0:51:46- 'When I was a little girl, I never dreamed...- Really?
0:51:46 > 0:51:48'What, all this? I don't think so.
0:51:48 > 0:51:50'My dad had me down for a room in King's Cross
0:51:50 > 0:51:52'with a steady line of punters.
0:51:52 > 0:51:55'Don't tell Alfie, but if it wasn't for him
0:51:55 > 0:51:57'I reckon I'd be there an' all.
0:51:57 > 0:51:59'We're all hanging out for a hero, Kat.
0:51:59 > 0:52:05'And mine's sitting in there. It's lucky, ain't it?
0:52:05 > 0:52:08'To find someone that you love so much.'
0:52:08 > 0:52:10Right, who's up for a cold beer?
0:52:14 > 0:52:20'I keep at it and I reckon one day he'll feel like it back.'
0:52:20 > 0:52:25And he could, couldn't he? He could get it back, yeah?
0:52:25 > 0:52:29You don't think Alfie loves you?
0:52:29 > 0:52:33No. Does he hell.
0:52:39 > 0:52:42- Why, eh? Why d'you do it? - You did it!
0:52:42 > 0:52:46You did it! You evil murdering filth!
0:52:46 > 0:52:50And I've got you taped.
0:52:50 > 0:52:52- Yeah, I have heard you. - Take her home, Patrick.
0:52:54 > 0:52:56It was meant to be a present.
0:52:57 > 0:53:00I thought someone had sent me a Christmas present.
0:53:02 > 0:53:08And I promise you on my life, Phil Mitchell,
0:53:08 > 0:53:11the next time we speak, it will be through a lawyer.
0:53:11 > 0:53:14Cos you WILL be under arrest.
0:53:16 > 0:53:20I heard you admit it, Phil Mitchell!
0:53:22 > 0:53:25Oh. Oh, Shirley,
0:53:27 > 0:53:30Kevin. Kevin. It was...
0:53:30 > 0:53:34It was Phil's fault. Phil knew.
0:53:34 > 0:53:37And he good as drove that car that killed him.
0:53:37 > 0:53:42Take her home, Patrick, and shut her up.
0:54:02 > 0:54:04PHIL: 'All roads lead to you.
0:54:04 > 0:54:08'If I wanted to screw you up, there's better ways than a memory stick through Denise's letter box.'
0:54:08 > 0:54:10- Get the evidence back... - Yeah, what?
0:54:10 > 0:54:13- I'll have you, that's what. - Woah, woah, woah, woah, woah.
0:54:13 > 0:54:16This isn't the Christmas spirit, is it?
0:54:16 > 0:54:17No. No. No. No. No.
0:54:17 > 0:54:20No, I object to this kind of behaviour
0:54:20 > 0:54:23because it is disrespectful to the baby Jesus on his birthday.
0:54:23 > 0:54:25You may not know it, mate,
0:54:25 > 0:54:28but we've got a sick woman in this house, and kiddies.
0:54:28 > 0:54:30And an old man who's waiting for a visit.
0:54:30 > 0:54:34Now, this being the season of goodwill...
0:54:34 > 0:54:37We don't want to get blood on the carpet, do we?
0:54:42 > 0:54:45You better keep your doors locked then.
0:54:45 > 0:54:48Peace be with you, my good man.
0:54:48 > 0:54:51Season's whatsits and all that!
0:54:53 > 0:54:57Well, let's have that Christmas pudding, eh?
0:54:57 > 0:55:00Eh? Come on, girls.
0:55:03 > 0:55:06Ben!
0:55:06 > 0:55:10You lying little toerag. You hate him that much?
0:55:10 > 0:55:12You hate him that much?
0:55:13 > 0:55:16What's going on in that thick skull of yours, eh?
0:55:16 > 0:55:18How far will you go to make his life a misery?
0:55:20 > 0:55:24Your dad...he could go down for this, you idiot.
0:55:25 > 0:55:27It's been a long time coming, Shirl.
0:55:36 > 0:55:40I know you can't help having a limp, but I'm not an angel, I'm Shenice.
0:55:40 > 0:55:44- And now Kat hasn't seen my show. - No.
0:55:44 > 0:55:47So do you want the job or what?
0:55:47 > 0:55:49Are there many other applicants?
0:55:49 > 0:55:52- Can you knit?- I can knit.
0:55:52 > 0:55:54Sign the contract. You've passed.
0:55:54 > 0:55:56Oh. Oh, I'm so pleased.
0:55:56 > 0:55:58Cos it suits both of us really, doesn't it?
0:55:58 > 0:56:01Cos I do have a bit of previous experience...
0:56:01 > 0:56:04- Jean! Jean! - We can bake cakes together.
0:56:04 > 0:56:08I'll get knitting needles, Stacey broke my last ones, she never got the hang of casting.
0:56:08 > 0:56:13Jean! Jean, you do realise that you'll never be my real nanny, don't you?
0:56:13 > 0:56:17Yes. Yes, I do realise that.
0:56:17 > 0:56:21But then every little girl needs a nanny for Christmas, doesn't she?
0:56:22 > 0:56:24Will you be my Nanny Christmas?
0:56:24 > 0:56:27I'll be your Nanny Christmas.
0:56:27 > 0:56:30Sign here.
0:56:31 > 0:56:34# ..To you and your kin
0:56:34 > 0:56:36# We wish you a merry Christmas and a happy new year... #
0:56:36 > 0:56:38Merry Christmas.
0:56:38 > 0:56:41Happy new year.
0:56:41 > 0:56:45# We wish you a merry Christmas We wish you a merry Christmas
0:56:45 > 0:56:52# We wish you a merry Christmas and a happy new year! #
0:56:52 > 0:56:54THEY CHEER
0:56:54 > 0:57:00Oh, oh, oh. Charge your glasses everyone, for a toast.
0:57:03 > 0:57:08- My family. Salut.- Family!
0:57:38 > 0:57:41The police have just left.
0:57:41 > 0:57:45I can get my things. I'll sleep downstairs,
0:57:45 > 0:57:49just until they track Yusef down.
0:57:49 > 0:57:52Thank you.
0:57:52 > 0:57:54Hello, Baba.
0:57:58 > 0:57:59You need some peace.
0:57:59 > 0:58:02- Ssh, come on.- Mummy. Mummy.
0:58:05 > 0:58:07No.
0:58:09 > 0:58:12Masood.
0:58:17 > 0:58:23Masood. I am so, so sorry.
0:58:26 > 0:58:28And...
0:58:30 > 0:58:33..I love you.
0:58:38 > 0:58:40Say that again.
0:58:43 > 0:58:44I love you.
0:58:44 > 0:58:46No, no.
0:58:46 > 0:58:48The bit about you being really sorry.
0:58:52 > 0:58:55Masood...
0:58:55 > 0:58:59- SOBS:- I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
0:59:02 > 0:59:09# So here it is merry Christmas Everybody's having fun... #
0:59:09 > 0:59:12It's Christmas!
0:59:12 > 0:59:16# Look to the future now
0:59:16 > 0:59:20# It's only just begun... #
0:59:31 > 0:59:34PEOPLE CHAT AND LAUGH
0:59:51 > 0:59:53Masood!
0:59:55 > 0:59:58Where have you been hiding? Come on.
0:59:58 > 1:00:00- SHE PURRS - Come on in.
1:00:00 > 1:00:04Put down your jacket, yeah? Orange juice?
1:00:04 > 1:00:09Masood! Merry Christmas.
1:00:09 > 1:00:12Yes, it is, isn't it?
1:00:53 > 1:00:56Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
1:00:56 > 1:00:58E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk