06/06/2012

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0:00:49 > 0:00:50SHE SIGHS

0:00:50 > 0:00:52LOUD DANCE MUSIC

0:00:55 > 0:00:57DOORBELL RINGS

0:00:57 > 0:00:59I'll go.

0:01:07 > 0:01:10'Hello, this is Mr Porter, I don't know which of your cleaners

0:01:10 > 0:01:13'has been round, but I've just come home after two days

0:01:13 > 0:01:15'and I've noticed a couple of things missing.

0:01:15 > 0:01:17'I'd be very grateful if you could ring me back as soon as possible.

0:01:17 > 0:01:19'Thank you.

0:01:19 > 0:01:22'End of messages. To delete messages press delete.'

0:01:36 > 0:01:38Thank you. Enjoy the parade.

0:01:38 > 0:01:42Kim, Colin Jackson wants to find out if the yoghurt is fat free?

0:01:42 > 0:01:45- Don't know.- And he says one of the chairs is wobbly.

0:01:45 > 0:01:48Well, don't look at me, cos that's Denise's flat-packs.

0:01:48 > 0:01:50Yes, they were fine when I did them.

0:01:50 > 0:01:52And another thing...

0:01:52 > 0:01:54Fatima Whitbread wants full English breakfast with toast

0:01:54 > 0:01:56- and black coffee.- Oh.

0:02:00 > 0:02:02Please... Look, Kim.

0:02:02 > 0:02:05Why don't we ask Denise to lend us a hand?

0:02:05 > 0:02:08Has Hell frozen over?

0:02:15 > 0:02:17And it shoots video. Hang on.

0:02:17 > 0:02:19Right, say something.

0:02:19 > 0:02:22I dunno. Er... nice phone.

0:02:22 > 0:02:24Yeah it's great, innit?

0:02:24 > 0:02:26So where d'you get it from?

0:02:26 > 0:02:28Ah, now that would be telling.

0:02:28 > 0:02:30- Would it?- Yeah.

0:02:30 > 0:02:32Anyway I've gotta go. Thanks for the coffee.

0:02:32 > 0:02:34Yeah, no worries.

0:02:38 > 0:02:40Here you go.

0:02:40 > 0:02:42Thanks.

0:02:42 > 0:02:43SHE CLEARS THROAT

0:02:43 > 0:02:47Afia, you know on reflection,

0:02:47 > 0:02:51we think that the whole speed-dating thing might not be such a good idea.

0:02:51 > 0:02:54But you were fine with it yesterday.

0:02:54 > 0:02:56I was a bit distracted.

0:02:56 > 0:02:58But it's my business.

0:02:58 > 0:02:59Zainab and I have been slow-dating...

0:02:59 > 0:03:01we've only just got engaged.

0:03:01 > 0:03:03Dad, please...

0:03:03 > 0:03:06Introducing people to each other for a few seconds

0:03:06 > 0:03:09and then expecting them to know whether they are suitable?

0:03:09 > 0:03:11What, the same as an arranged marriage, you mean?

0:03:11 > 0:03:12Nothing of the sort.

0:03:12 > 0:03:15Look, the buffet hasn't worked. We need people in.

0:03:15 > 0:03:18So if this event goes well, well they might stay and have a meal...

0:03:18 > 0:03:20Yes, but speed-dating?

0:03:20 > 0:03:23Mum, look let me reassure you. each person is invited to

0:03:23 > 0:03:25bring along a chaperone or a mahram with them.

0:03:25 > 0:03:29And also there's going to be a Muslim scholar on hand

0:03:29 > 0:03:33to explain the importance and cultural significance of marriage, so it's fine.

0:03:33 > 0:03:35Well... in that case.

0:03:35 > 0:03:39With the importance of marriage and... Yeah, that's good for me.

0:03:39 > 0:03:41I think we should let them get on with it.

0:03:41 > 0:03:42OK, right. Thank you.

0:03:42 > 0:03:45But don't think we won't be there.

0:03:46 > 0:03:50A Muslim scholar? Mahrams? Are you kidding me?

0:03:50 > 0:03:54No one's going to turn up, and if they do, they defo won't be my kind.

0:03:54 > 0:03:58I said he'd be on hand, I didn't say he was coming.

0:03:58 > 0:04:00And as for the chaperones, are you mad?

0:04:00 > 0:04:03Oh. Right. Yeah, 'cos I want the fittest ones for myself.

0:04:03 > 0:04:06Yeah, of course you do. What?

0:04:06 > 0:04:10Nothing. Nothing.

0:04:10 > 0:04:12- You know I'd love to.- You would?

0:04:12 > 0:04:15Yeah, you know, Her Majesty's Jubilee parade?

0:04:15 > 0:04:17Like the horses, the carts, the boats...

0:04:17 > 0:04:19Oh, it would make my day.

0:04:19 > 0:04:21It's just a shame I can't do it.

0:04:21 > 0:04:25I'm working and this guy's got me working like I don't know what.

0:04:25 > 0:04:27How are you doing, Mr Pepperelli?

0:04:27 > 0:04:29- Mr Papadopoulos.- Yeah, well.

0:04:29 > 0:04:31My sister always gets it wrong.

0:04:31 > 0:04:32Does she really?

0:04:32 > 0:04:34Yeah. I'll have a word with him?

0:04:34 > 0:04:36- No, no, no, no, no.- Yeah. - No, no, Rosie, leave it.

0:04:36 > 0:04:38- I'm going to.- Rosie, Rosie...

0:04:38 > 0:04:41Mister Papadopoulos...?

0:04:44 > 0:04:46EXCUSE ME!

0:04:46 > 0:04:48Not so loud. My head.

0:04:48 > 0:04:50Someone spiked the vodka.

0:04:50 > 0:04:51Oh, did they? What, with orange juice?

0:04:51 > 0:04:54- Oh, very funny. - Just get out my way, Mo.

0:04:57 > 0:04:59All sorted.

0:04:59 > 0:05:00Sorted?

0:05:00 > 0:05:03Yeah, all cleaned up. Spick and span, see...

0:05:03 > 0:05:04Oh, oh good. Good.

0:05:04 > 0:05:07The thing is Jean, though, people don't come to the Vic

0:05:07 > 0:05:09because it's all spick and span.

0:05:09 > 0:05:12The thing is, they come because it's a pub and what do pubs sell?

0:05:12 > 0:05:19I don't know how I managed to forget, but that's all sorted too.

0:05:19 > 0:05:22The order's in. Beer and everything is on its way.

0:05:22 > 0:05:25Should be here any minute, so there's nothing to worry about.

0:05:25 > 0:05:28And Alfie can come back tomorrow,

0:05:28 > 0:05:32and everything will be EXACTLY as it always has been.

0:05:35 > 0:05:37'I've just come home after two days

0:05:37 > 0:05:39'and I've noticed a couple of things missing.

0:05:39 > 0:05:42'I'd be very grateful if you'd ring me back as soon as possible.

0:05:42 > 0:05:43'Thank you.

0:05:43 > 0:05:46'End of messages. To delete messages...'

0:05:46 > 0:05:47PHONE BEEPS

0:05:47 > 0:05:49Oh morning, Billy.

0:05:49 > 0:05:50Morning.

0:05:50 > 0:05:51You're looking very guilty...

0:05:51 > 0:05:55Eh? No, I'm just doing a bit of work.

0:05:55 > 0:05:56I hope so.

0:05:59 > 0:06:00He can't come!

0:06:00 > 0:06:03- What do you mean, he can't come? - His boss won't let him.

0:06:03 > 0:06:04- Miserable git.- Mmm.

0:06:04 > 0:06:08I really wanted to see the Queen but without Arthur,

0:06:08 > 0:06:11a handsome man on my arm, I should feel totally naked.

0:06:12 > 0:06:14Leave it to me.

0:06:14 > 0:06:15What?

0:06:15 > 0:06:18We're going to have to spring him, get him out of there.

0:06:18 > 0:06:20- How?- You've given me an idea.

0:06:20 > 0:06:23- I have?- Grab your hat. Come on.

0:06:27 > 0:06:29INDISTINCT CHATTER

0:06:30 > 0:06:33- When are the rest of them going to come down?- Who knows?

0:06:33 > 0:06:37I've got rooms to clean, I've got to change the sheets...

0:06:37 > 0:06:40Kim, have you told them when it's check-out time?

0:06:42 > 0:06:46Look man, this is basic stuff! Now, Denise would have been...

0:06:46 > 0:06:49Look, don't...even... mention...her...name. Yeah?

0:06:49 > 0:06:51You're going to have to wake them up.

0:06:51 > 0:06:53Me? No, no, no, no, no. That is not my job, all right.

0:06:53 > 0:06:54SHE SIGHS

0:06:54 > 0:06:56All right, take this then.

0:06:56 > 0:06:57Kim, wait.

0:06:57 > 0:07:01I've got six more people arriving later, I'm a staff member down

0:07:01 > 0:07:03and my boyfriend's gone AWOL in Swanage or wherever he's gone.

0:07:03 > 0:07:05- Kim, Kim, Kim, Kim.- What?

0:07:05 > 0:07:07- Look.- What?

0:07:09 > 0:07:11Oh.

0:07:12 > 0:07:14Go on then.

0:07:14 > 0:07:16No.

0:07:16 > 0:07:18- Well, if you won't, I will. - You can't.

0:07:20 > 0:07:22Here.

0:07:22 > 0:07:25Hello, my love. There you go. Sorry it's late.

0:07:25 > 0:07:27Enjoy. All right?

0:07:29 > 0:07:34The definition of this face, the jaw-line, what do you think, Rose?

0:07:35 > 0:07:38Magnificent.

0:07:38 > 0:07:40They're going to love drawing you.

0:07:40 > 0:07:43Oh, please say yes. You'll make a lot of ladies really happy.

0:07:43 > 0:07:47The naked body is very beautiful, don't you think so, Rose?

0:07:47 > 0:07:48Naked?

0:07:48 > 0:07:50Our life class model's let us down.

0:07:50 > 0:07:51Life class?

0:07:51 > 0:07:54But thanks to this young man...

0:07:54 > 0:07:56No. Hang on, wait a minute...

0:07:56 > 0:07:58I've got to take my clothes off?

0:07:58 > 0:08:02Of course. But don't be shy, a beautiful young man like you.

0:08:02 > 0:08:04Yeah, sorry ladies, I've...

0:08:04 > 0:08:05We've seen it all before.

0:08:05 > 0:08:10Well, some of them have, but not for quite some time.

0:08:10 > 0:08:12THEY SNIGGER

0:08:12 > 0:08:14Sorry, ladies. Sorry to interrupt. Ain't you working here today?

0:08:14 > 0:08:16What?

0:08:16 > 0:08:18Ain't you supposed to be working here today?

0:08:18 > 0:08:20Yeah, yeah, that's right, that's right.

0:08:20 > 0:08:22Yeah, sorry, I forgot, I'm working here.

0:08:22 > 0:08:26Yeah, otherwise I'd have loved to have come, but I can't. Sorry.

0:08:26 > 0:08:30In that case, doesn't that make you free, Arthur?

0:08:30 > 0:08:34Moi? No. No, no, Rosie. No, Rosie baby, no.

0:08:34 > 0:08:37You see, the thing is that I... well we are backed up, you see.

0:08:37 > 0:08:39And there's going to be queues round the corner...

0:08:39 > 0:08:41No, no, I can manage.

0:08:41 > 0:08:42Thank you.

0:08:42 > 0:08:44My pleasure.

0:08:44 > 0:08:45THEY LAUGH AWKWARDLY

0:08:45 > 0:08:47Lovely, lovely.

0:08:51 > 0:08:53Does she think something's missing?

0:08:53 > 0:08:55Yeah. I've heard Jack's missing stuff as well.

0:08:55 > 0:08:56Yeah, so?

0:08:56 > 0:08:58Lo...

0:08:58 > 0:08:59Don't look at me.

0:08:59 > 0:09:00I'm not looking at you.

0:09:03 > 0:09:05Yes, you are. You think I did it, yeah?

0:09:05 > 0:09:07No, I don't.

0:09:07 > 0:09:09Anyone could've got hold of the keys in that office.

0:09:09 > 0:09:11I know, just don't say anything, all right?

0:09:11 > 0:09:14We've need to sort this before Janine finds out.

0:09:14 > 0:09:15All right.

0:09:17 > 0:09:21Three months in Washington DC, that was incredible

0:09:21 > 0:09:24and then Pakistan, I didn't have enough time there though,

0:09:24 > 0:09:26I'm going back as soon as I've saved up again...

0:09:26 > 0:09:29All right, enough, enough! You're making me jealous.

0:09:29 > 0:09:30Is it a letter on each table?

0:09:30 > 0:09:32Yeah, yeah, thanks.

0:09:32 > 0:09:34Do you just, like, go on your own?

0:09:34 > 0:09:38Well, it depends, if no-one wants to come then... yeah.

0:09:38 > 0:09:39That's cool, that's really cool.

0:09:39 > 0:09:41HE GRUNTS

0:09:41 > 0:09:42No, it's fun, Tam.

0:09:42 > 0:09:45The more you travel, the more contacts you make.

0:09:45 > 0:09:48I've got friends that I can stay with all over the world now.

0:09:48 > 0:09:51Yeah, I've got friends here. And family here, and a business here.

0:09:51 > 0:09:52And we know exactly what we're going to do

0:09:52 > 0:09:55every day for the rest of lives.

0:09:58 > 0:10:00If my boss catches us, we're going to be pigeon nuggets.

0:10:00 > 0:10:02- Oh shush.- Oh, this is such fun.

0:10:02 > 0:10:05Life classes! life classes? You ladies are nang.

0:10:05 > 0:10:06HE LAUGHS

0:10:06 > 0:10:08I take that's a compliment?

0:10:08 > 0:10:09Of the highest equivalent.

0:10:09 > 0:10:12Let me tell you, you two are like royalty to me.

0:10:12 > 0:10:13Oi!

0:10:14 > 0:10:17Jean, Jean... you got a minute?

0:10:17 > 0:10:18You've got my money?

0:10:21 > 0:10:23I told Janine because I didn't know what else to do.

0:10:23 > 0:10:25I've been worried sick...

0:10:25 > 0:10:27Forget about it, last night was last night.

0:10:27 > 0:10:30Me and Janine, we had a chat, we both want to sort it out.

0:10:30 > 0:10:32Both?

0:10:32 > 0:10:36Yeah, yeah, so why don't you come over to our place... about 2.00?

0:10:36 > 0:10:39- I should be done by then.- Very good.

0:10:43 > 0:10:48Well, I just wanted to pop round and say congratulations properly.

0:10:48 > 0:10:50These are beautiful, thank you.

0:10:50 > 0:10:53Now, either you've done something or you want something.

0:10:53 > 0:10:54No...

0:10:54 > 0:10:56Well, why aren't you at the B&B then?

0:10:56 > 0:11:02Well, her Majesty the Queen is not the only one who likes to rule.

0:11:02 > 0:11:04Oh. So you haven't made up yet?

0:11:04 > 0:11:05SHE TUTS

0:11:05 > 0:11:08So no affair...

0:11:08 > 0:11:09Huh?

0:11:09 > 0:11:12End of the drought for you then.

0:11:12 > 0:11:15I am going to put these flowers in a vase.

0:11:15 > 0:11:17Said the actress to the bishop.

0:11:17 > 0:11:20- Denise, you can be so crude sometimes.- Yeah, I know. Yeah.

0:11:20 > 0:11:21PHONE RINGS

0:11:21 > 0:11:24Oh, could you get that for me, please? Thank you.

0:11:27 > 0:11:29Hello?

0:11:29 > 0:11:32No, sorry, Mr Masood's not here at the moment.

0:11:32 > 0:11:35Yeah, yeah OK, I will.

0:11:36 > 0:11:42Um... message for Mr Masood to call the admissions officer.

0:11:42 > 0:11:43Tam!

0:11:43 > 0:11:46- Well, unless Mas is thinking of going back to college.- As if.

0:11:46 > 0:11:48Well, then.

0:11:48 > 0:11:50Well, why wouldn't Tamwar mention anything?

0:11:51 > 0:11:54You know, we'd have to make it work.

0:11:54 > 0:11:57Oh, maybe Masood and I could take over the Argee Bhajee again...

0:11:57 > 0:11:58only if we had to.

0:11:58 > 0:12:00Hey, look at you, Zee, plotting and planning,

0:12:00 > 0:12:03and going all respectable again, and not a clue what your kids are up to.

0:12:03 > 0:12:05Everything's back to normal. Stick the kettle on.

0:12:05 > 0:12:07SHE GIGGLES

0:12:12 > 0:12:16I still think we've got a problem with this Jean, you know.

0:12:17 > 0:12:20I just don't know what's going on in her head.

0:12:20 > 0:12:23It's creepy, you know, when she thinks I'm her son.

0:12:23 > 0:12:26I don't think that it's tucking you up in bed at night

0:12:26 > 0:12:28that she wants to do.

0:12:28 > 0:12:29Please.

0:12:29 > 0:12:32Well, you can hardly blame the woman, leading her on like that. Come on.

0:12:32 > 0:12:37No, no, no, it's not that. No, she's fixated about something.

0:12:37 > 0:12:39- The baby.- The baby?

0:12:39 > 0:12:42Yeah, yeah, yeah, because if she thinks I'm this Sean geezer,

0:12:42 > 0:12:45then she must think that that's her granddaughter.

0:12:47 > 0:12:50Well, I think you've been watching too many horror movies...

0:12:50 > 0:12:52HE CHUCKLES

0:12:52 > 0:12:54Yeah. Yeah.

0:12:56 > 0:12:58You going home?

0:12:58 > 0:13:00Yeah, my back is killing me.

0:13:00 > 0:13:02OK, I'll get you something nice for supper.

0:13:02 > 0:13:04Will you bring my bags?

0:13:26 > 0:13:28Hello?

0:13:28 > 0:13:31Janine? Michael?

0:13:38 > 0:13:39Hello?

0:13:44 > 0:13:47Anybody there?

0:14:05 > 0:14:06Easy, Patrick.

0:14:06 > 0:14:09Where on earth have you been?

0:14:09 > 0:14:11- Shopping.- Shopping?

0:14:11 > 0:14:12- Yeah.- With what?

0:14:12 > 0:14:14Look, we needed sheets.

0:14:14 > 0:14:17Honestly, the crowds out there were ridiculous, I only hope

0:14:17 > 0:14:19they're not planning this Jubilee thing every year.

0:14:19 > 0:14:22You bought new sheets? What's wrong with washing the old ones?

0:14:22 > 0:14:23I didn't have time.

0:14:23 > 0:14:25So you still haven't made up the beds then?

0:14:25 > 0:14:28- Relax, it's cool, it's cool. - No, no, no, Kim, it ain't cool.

0:14:28 > 0:14:29It ain't cool at all, man.

0:14:29 > 0:14:31Look, we need help, I'm going to call Denise.

0:14:31 > 0:14:33Whoa, whoa, whoa. No, no, no. no. No, Patrick.

0:14:33 > 0:14:37What does it say on the sign outside?

0:14:37 > 0:14:41The clue's in the words Kim's Palace, yeah?

0:14:41 > 0:14:44So you can't come and tell me how to run my business

0:14:44 > 0:14:47and you're certainly not going to go and tell my sister to come

0:14:47 > 0:14:50round here with her interfering nose where it's not wanted.

0:14:50 > 0:14:51Oh, come on, there's...

0:14:51 > 0:14:56I'm perfectly happy and capable of running this business

0:14:56 > 0:14:58by myself without you or anybody else's help, all right?

0:14:58 > 0:15:00- Good.- Good.

0:15:00 > 0:15:02Your new credit card machine ain't working.

0:15:02 > 0:15:04You need milk, butter and bread.

0:15:04 > 0:15:07The new guests have arrived and two of the guests staying last night,

0:15:07 > 0:15:09they're refusing to pay their bills.

0:15:09 > 0:15:12What? Refusing to pay? We'll soon see about that.

0:15:12 > 0:15:14Yeah, well, they're claiming there was a mouse in the room.

0:15:14 > 0:15:17A mouse? Do me a favour.

0:15:21 > 0:15:25Oh... you've killed poor Timmy.

0:15:31 > 0:15:36You left a message in the office? No, I didn't get it.

0:15:36 > 0:15:38No. Well, I can promise you that all of our cleaners

0:15:38 > 0:15:41are very carefully vetted.

0:15:41 > 0:15:45OK, well, I'll look straight into it. OK, bye.

0:15:45 > 0:15:46SHE GASPS

0:15:46 > 0:15:50Jean, what the hell are you doing here?

0:15:50 > 0:15:52- Waiting for you.- Waiting for me?

0:15:52 > 0:15:54How did you get in?

0:15:54 > 0:15:57No, look, I just want my money.

0:15:57 > 0:16:01This is my house, you can't just march in here.

0:16:01 > 0:16:04Michael told me to come round... the door was open.

0:16:04 > 0:16:06Jean, this has got to stop.

0:16:06 > 0:16:09This... this thing you have with Michael, this obsession...

0:16:09 > 0:16:11What obsession?

0:16:11 > 0:16:16Michael is not Sean, and this baby is not your granddaughter...

0:16:16 > 0:16:17Is that what he's been saying?

0:16:17 > 0:16:20Just keep away from me, OK? And keep away from Michael...

0:16:20 > 0:16:23No, no, no, no, he's got this muddled up.

0:16:23 > 0:16:25It's twisted, he's twisted it.

0:16:25 > 0:16:28This has got nothing to do with Sean and Michael and babies.

0:16:28 > 0:16:30This is about the money!

0:16:30 > 0:16:34There is no money, not anywhere but in your crazy head.

0:16:34 > 0:16:35No, I am not crazy.

0:16:35 > 0:16:38Whatever, just get out, OK? Leave.

0:16:38 > 0:16:40No. Not without my money.

0:16:40 > 0:16:43You really are going to let him get away with this, aren't you?

0:16:43 > 0:16:45Just get out!

0:16:45 > 0:16:46Janine?

0:16:47 > 0:16:49Michael, thank God you're here.

0:16:49 > 0:16:50What's going on?

0:16:50 > 0:16:53This mad woman's just marched into my house.

0:16:53 > 0:16:54What?

0:16:54 > 0:16:57I came round, as you said, Michael, as you said.

0:16:59 > 0:17:01Why on earth would I do that?

0:17:01 > 0:17:04In fact I told you expressly last night and again today,

0:17:04 > 0:17:08to keep away from us, to stay away from us, leave us alone.

0:17:08 > 0:17:10What?

0:17:10 > 0:17:13You see, it don't matter what I say, she gets it a bit wrong, don't you?

0:17:13 > 0:17:17No, no, I'm not having that. I am not mad and I am not ill.

0:17:17 > 0:17:20I just want my money.

0:17:20 > 0:17:24OK, would you be so kind as to produce a receipt?

0:17:27 > 0:17:29- A receipt?- Yeah.

0:17:29 > 0:17:31Yes, Jean. Proof.

0:17:31 > 0:17:33You know, something real,

0:17:33 > 0:17:37that real people give to each other in the real world.

0:17:39 > 0:17:40Just get out.

0:17:40 > 0:17:45You are evil, both of you, pure evil.

0:17:45 > 0:17:47Yeah, it's time to go, Jean.

0:17:47 > 0:17:48HE SNIGGERS

0:17:51 > 0:17:54SHE GASPS

0:17:54 > 0:17:56I mean...

0:18:05 > 0:18:08No, no, no, I'm not marrying your mother for a second time

0:18:08 > 0:18:10without knowing when to stay out of things.

0:18:10 > 0:18:12When does the scholar get here?

0:18:12 > 0:18:14Yeah, he's not coming, his wife's sick.

0:18:14 > 0:18:16But, you know, it's all right cos you're here, Mum,

0:18:16 > 0:18:19so if anyone needs any guidance, I'll refer them to you.

0:18:19 > 0:18:23Yeah, the couples have to see each other.

0:18:30 > 0:18:33By the way, the admissions officer rang.

0:18:33 > 0:18:35Don't worry, I will not say anything.

0:18:35 > 0:18:38I haven't even told Masood. It's not like me to interfere, you know.

0:18:38 > 0:18:40Admissions officer?

0:18:42 > 0:18:45Yeah, isn't it exciting? Tamwar's going back to college.

0:18:47 > 0:18:51You didn't know? Oh, I'm so sorry, Afia.

0:18:51 > 0:18:53That is so typical of Tamwar.

0:18:54 > 0:18:59I expect he'll tell everyone, you know, once he's secured a place...

0:18:59 > 0:19:01best not to say anything.

0:19:01 > 0:19:04Don't worry, his secret's safe with me.

0:19:10 > 0:19:11SHE SIGHS

0:19:27 > 0:19:29You wanted to see us?

0:19:29 > 0:19:31We've had some complaints.

0:19:31 > 0:19:33- Complaints?- Mm-hm.

0:19:33 > 0:19:36- Stuff has gone missing from some of the houses we clean.- No?

0:19:36 > 0:19:38So? It weren't me.

0:19:38 > 0:19:41Apparently messages have been left at the office,

0:19:41 > 0:19:42but somebody's erased them.

0:19:42 > 0:19:45Well, I never. You tell her, Pops.

0:19:45 > 0:19:48Yeah. No, Janine, it wasn't her. You've got the wrong person.

0:19:48 > 0:19:52You can swear that on your life, can you, Billy?

0:19:53 > 0:19:54You're fired.

0:19:54 > 0:19:56Oh, Janine, you can't do that.

0:19:56 > 0:19:58Oh, I can and I have.

0:19:58 > 0:20:00Look, we can't run a cleaning business

0:20:00 > 0:20:03if we cannot trust our cleaners, Billy.

0:20:04 > 0:20:06Round nine!

0:20:06 > 0:20:09KLAXON SOUNDS

0:20:09 > 0:20:11Not as bad as I thought, this.

0:20:11 > 0:20:13Certainly wasn't what I was expecting.

0:20:13 > 0:20:15Fancy your chances, did you?

0:20:15 > 0:20:19Yeah, but like a fool I asked someone to marry me last night.

0:20:19 > 0:20:21What a downright crazy thing to do.

0:20:21 > 0:20:22Yeah, I know.

0:20:24 > 0:20:26THEY LAUGH

0:20:30 > 0:20:33AFIA CONTINUES LAUGHING

0:20:36 > 0:20:38What?

0:21:01 > 0:21:02Change. Thank you.

0:21:02 > 0:21:04Lovely. Hey, Billy Boy, how you doing, man?

0:21:04 > 0:21:06Does Lola like her new phone?

0:21:06 > 0:21:08Eh?

0:21:08 > 0:21:12You know, the one I fixed up for her, it's got like video, mp3 etc, etc.

0:21:12 > 0:21:13You gave her the phone?

0:21:13 > 0:21:15Well, yeah, I just forgot to tell her though,

0:21:15 > 0:21:17that with Fats she gets a free three month guarantee.

0:21:17 > 0:21:20Next time you see her, could you just let her know, please?

0:21:20 > 0:21:21- Yeah.- Wicked.

0:21:21 > 0:21:25Here, you'd better get upstairs, Jean's ripping up the place.

0:21:25 > 0:21:28- What do you mean?- Kat and Alfie's stuff's everywhere,

0:21:28 > 0:21:30think mad woman's lunchbox, only bigger.

0:21:30 > 0:21:32OK, I'm going, I'm going, I'm going.

0:21:32 > 0:21:34Ladies, Today, you two are amazing.

0:21:34 > 0:21:37The Queen has got nothing on you two Majesties.

0:21:37 > 0:21:39Life class good, was it?

0:21:39 > 0:21:41Yeah, you know, yeah it was.

0:21:41 > 0:21:44They made us try on loads of different costumes and stuff and...

0:21:44 > 0:21:46Mmm. I saw you. On the telly.

0:21:46 > 0:21:49On the telly? You must be mistaken.

0:21:49 > 0:21:50Oh, there was no mistake.

0:21:50 > 0:21:54The camera zoomed right in on all of you, waving like idiots.

0:21:54 > 0:21:56It was nothing to do with me. I was just escorting these two ladies.

0:21:56 > 0:21:58Don't think you'll get away with this.

0:21:58 > 0:22:01I'm sorry, Arthur. But... on the telly!

0:22:01 > 0:22:02Big deal.

0:22:02 > 0:22:05- Quick, let's go and see if we made the news.- Come on.

0:22:08 > 0:22:11Wait, FB's never been on TV. Wait for me, man...

0:22:11 > 0:22:14You see, I buy you drinks and you don't even hold the door.

0:22:14 > 0:22:16Are you serious?

0:22:16 > 0:22:18Ladies, wait for me!

0:22:20 > 0:22:22Jean?

0:22:24 > 0:22:25I've lost it.

0:22:28 > 0:22:30I've lost it.

0:22:32 > 0:22:34Yeah, I can see that.

0:22:36 > 0:22:41He said he'd give me a receipt, but it's definitely not here

0:22:41 > 0:22:44and I can't remember whether he did or he didn't.

0:22:44 > 0:22:48Sorry, a receipt for what, Jean?

0:22:48 > 0:22:52The money. Mine, Alfie's, everything.

0:22:55 > 0:22:57Even The Vic's.

0:23:01 > 0:23:04- When did you last hear Afia laugh like that?- I don't know.

0:23:04 > 0:23:06- Must be this whole college thing. - What college thing?

0:23:06 > 0:23:09Apparently Tamwar has applied to go to college

0:23:09 > 0:23:11and he didn't tell anyone.

0:23:11 > 0:23:13How he can afford to do that, I don't know.

0:23:14 > 0:23:17Then again, he's still young, I suppose.

0:23:17 > 0:23:21And we could always look after the business, while he's studying.

0:23:22 > 0:23:26Oh, but could that drive them further apart?

0:23:27 > 0:23:28Oh.

0:23:30 > 0:23:32Of course.

0:23:32 > 0:23:34How could I have been so stupid?!

0:23:34 > 0:23:36- Yeah?- The answer is staring me in the face,

0:23:36 > 0:23:38why I didn't think of it before?

0:23:38 > 0:23:41- She's wonderful with Kamil...- Ah.

0:23:41 > 0:23:43So she and Tamwar, they could start a family.

0:23:43 > 0:23:47The sooner she has a baby of her own, the better. Yes.

0:24:09 > 0:24:12Creeping me out, Jean, is not going to work.

0:24:12 > 0:24:15You've got to let it go, I don't have your money.

0:24:16 > 0:24:20It's not her you've got to convince, is it? It's me.

0:24:20 > 0:24:21All right, Rox? You look fit.

0:24:21 > 0:24:23Thank you. Where's the money, Michael?

0:24:25 > 0:24:30Will someone change the record? What money? There isn't any money.

0:24:30 > 0:24:31Oh right, so you've lost it?

0:24:31 > 0:24:33Is that what you're telling me, you've lost it?

0:24:33 > 0:24:35No, I'm not telling you've I've lost it.

0:24:35 > 0:24:38- The simple reason is, I didn't have it in the first place.- You liar.

0:24:39 > 0:24:41It's a fantasy.

0:24:41 > 0:24:45He's lying, it's all lies. He's in on this with Janine.

0:24:45 > 0:24:48Oh Janine, yeah, yeah, yeah, cos she's...

0:24:48 > 0:24:50she's really on her uppers now, ain't she?

0:24:50 > 0:24:53What, she's down to her last few million? Please, don't make me laugh.

0:24:55 > 0:24:59The truth is, Rox, she has a creepy fixation with us both...

0:24:59 > 0:25:00No.

0:25:00 > 0:25:02Yeah.

0:25:02 > 0:25:04Calls me Sean...

0:25:04 > 0:25:06Don't...

0:25:06 > 0:25:09She broke into our house today.

0:25:09 > 0:25:11I did not. He's not telling the truth. The door was open.

0:25:11 > 0:25:14You asked me round. He asked me round.

0:25:14 > 0:25:19Janine walked in, she's sitting there, it's freaked her out.

0:25:19 > 0:25:22If anything, you need to keep her away from us.

0:25:22 > 0:25:24He's lying. You've got to believe me...

0:25:24 > 0:25:27Jean...

0:25:27 > 0:25:28Shush, shush.

0:25:28 > 0:25:30Oh, no.

0:25:32 > 0:25:33Not you as well.

0:25:33 > 0:25:35- Jean.- No. Not you as well.

0:25:44 > 0:25:46So did many stay on for a meal?

0:25:46 > 0:25:48Yeah, it went really well.

0:25:48 > 0:25:51A great success, can't wait to do it again.

0:25:51 > 0:25:53OK. Well, everyone's gone up.

0:25:53 > 0:25:57So I think I might turn in as well.

0:25:57 > 0:26:01Give you kids a chance to have an early night, or...

0:26:03 > 0:26:08- Kids.- OK. They supported you on this, OK?

0:26:08 > 0:26:11They didn't agree with the speed-dating but they supported you.

0:26:11 > 0:26:13We all did.

0:26:13 > 0:26:17Zulekha wasn't happy, don't think she found a boyfriend tonight.

0:26:17 > 0:26:21But guess how many guys gave me their number? Go on, guess?

0:26:21 > 0:26:22I... I have no idea.

0:26:22 > 0:26:25Two. And they weren't students. Thank goodness.

0:26:25 > 0:26:28The thing about students is you can never believe a word they say,

0:26:28 > 0:26:31they look you in the eye and say one thing

0:26:31 > 0:26:35- but mean the complete opposite. - OK, Afia, what are you...

0:26:35 > 0:26:37I might just give this guy a call,

0:26:37 > 0:26:39I mean he was a great kisser and that.

0:26:47 > 0:26:50MUSIC ON RADIO: "Up The Junction" by Squeeze

0:26:58 > 0:27:00Jean, Jean.

0:27:03 > 0:27:05Jean, it's OK...

0:27:07 > 0:27:10Jean, look at me.

0:27:11 > 0:27:14Hey. Look at me.

0:27:19 > 0:27:21I believe you.

0:27:25 > 0:27:27It's OK. It's OK.

0:27:27 > 0:27:29SHE SOBS

0:27:29 > 0:27:30I know.

0:27:41 > 0:27:44ALARM STARTS

0:27:45 > 0:27:47HE GROANS

0:27:57 > 0:27:59SHE SIGHS

0:28:01 > 0:28:02Great!

0:28:02 > 0:28:04MUSIC: "Even When I'm Old And Grey" by Frank Sinatra

0:28:04 > 0:28:07# You make me feel so young

0:28:07 > 0:28:09Oh, cheer up, love.

0:28:09 > 0:28:12# Bells to be rung

0:28:12 > 0:28:15# And a wonderful fling to be flung

0:28:15 > 0:28:18# And even when I'm old and grey

0:28:19 > 0:28:24# I'm going to feel the way I do today

0:28:24 > 0:28:29# Because you make me feel so young... #

0:28:31 > 0:28:34Do me a favour! You can't charge that for sausages!

0:28:34 > 0:28:37What, did they star in Babe the movie or something?

0:28:37 > 0:28:38Luce, you all right babe?

0:28:38 > 0:28:39Yeah, I would be.

0:28:39 > 0:28:42If SHE wasn't expecting me to make her B&B breakfasts and not pay.

0:28:42 > 0:28:44SHE was after mates' rates.

0:28:44 > 0:28:46But SHE is not a mate.

0:28:46 > 0:28:50You know what, I think I'm going to sit this one out, you know.

0:28:50 > 0:28:52Still not served breakfasts then, Kim?

0:28:56 > 0:28:58I'll take my custom elsewhere, yeah?

0:28:58 > 0:28:59Hashtag bothered.

0:28:59 > 0:29:03Hashtag shut it, Blondie. Dishing up bangers in a caff?

0:29:03 > 0:29:05Hardly a career high.

0:29:05 > 0:29:07Well, least her customers get food.

0:29:07 > 0:29:11Unlike anyone who tries to eat the stuff from the Minute Mart.

0:29:11 > 0:29:14One is after a higher class of cuisine than one can get round here.

0:29:14 > 0:29:15- Fat Boy.- Looking good.

0:29:15 > 0:29:18Oi, any chance of more shifts at the chippie?

0:29:18 > 0:29:19What, I'm a Job Centre now, am I?

0:29:19 > 0:29:22Leave it out, Luce. Pregnant lady here.

0:29:22 > 0:29:24Oh, now you want to defend me?

0:29:24 > 0:29:27It's a bit late for that cos I've already been fired.

0:29:27 > 0:29:28Look, I said sorry, all right?

0:29:28 > 0:29:31OK? I'll make it up to you, I promise.

0:29:31 > 0:29:34I'll get you your job back by lunchtime.

0:29:36 > 0:29:39Lucy. £870.

0:29:39 > 0:29:42That's how short your last instalment was.

0:29:42 > 0:29:45I'm pregnant and I'm having mood swings.

0:29:45 > 0:29:49So, I want the cash right now, basically, otherwise my hormones

0:29:49 > 0:29:54might tell me to charge you a really unreasonable daily interest rate.

0:29:54 > 0:29:56Thanks.

0:29:56 > 0:30:00Do I actually have "cashpoint" written across my forehead?

0:30:00 > 0:30:03This florist thinks so. How can you charge so much for dead flowers?

0:30:03 > 0:30:06I never was a cheap bride.

0:30:06 > 0:30:09Clearly. You will stay away from Jean today, won't you?

0:30:09 > 0:30:11I can handle Loony Toon...

0:30:11 > 0:30:14I'm serious. Please.

0:30:14 > 0:30:16Just stay here or something.

0:30:16 > 0:30:19I am not going to let that woman dictate my life.

0:30:19 > 0:30:23It's business as usual.

0:30:28 > 0:30:33Listen, a Vic isn't a Vic without an Alfie, is it?

0:30:33 > 0:30:37OK. I'll see you later. OK, bye.

0:30:37 > 0:30:42Well, is he still coming back today?

0:30:42 > 0:30:46No. I've delayed him till after the weekend.

0:30:46 > 0:30:49We can still do this, Jean. We can.

0:30:49 > 0:30:53We can still get his money back, all right? Today.

0:30:56 > 0:30:59HE HUMS "UNCHAINED MELODY"

0:30:59 > 0:31:01# My darling

0:31:01 > 0:31:04HE CONTINUES HUMMING

0:31:04 > 0:31:07# ..Touch!

0:31:07 > 0:31:10Masood, stop it! Masood, stop it!

0:31:11 > 0:31:12Slightly awkward.

0:31:12 > 0:31:15We were just talking weddings.

0:31:15 > 0:31:17So I see.

0:31:17 > 0:31:19You all right, Tam? I heard you get up very early this morning.

0:31:19 > 0:31:23Fine. Please, continue with your domestic bliss.

0:31:24 > 0:31:27All right, well, we'll speak later?

0:31:27 > 0:31:29Zee, keep the wedding simple, please.

0:31:29 > 0:31:31Yes, and not much family.

0:31:31 > 0:31:33I don't want that workshy brother of yours

0:31:33 > 0:31:34lining his pockets with our food again.

0:31:34 > 0:31:36No horses, no dance routines.

0:31:36 > 0:31:39My back's hardly up to walking after sleeping on that couch.

0:31:39 > 0:31:42Oh, so you're marrying me to ease your back pain?

0:31:42 > 0:31:46I am marrying you, Zainab, because that's the way it should be.

0:31:47 > 0:31:49That's the way it should always have been.

0:31:49 > 0:31:53This marriage will wipe out everything that's gone wrong.

0:31:56 > 0:32:00Besides, I've tried every other way, but I just can't get into your bed.

0:32:00 > 0:32:02Ow!

0:32:02 > 0:32:04SHE GIGGLES

0:32:09 > 0:32:12# But he's got high hopes

0:32:12 > 0:32:16# He's got high hopes... #

0:32:16 > 0:32:19- You smell... floral. - Whitney's shampoo.

0:32:19 > 0:32:20You want to be careful, son.

0:32:20 > 0:32:23People'll start saying you're light on your loafers.

0:32:23 > 0:32:24Derek, does it have to be so loud?

0:32:24 > 0:32:28Yeah, it has to be that loud to hear it over that wallpaper.

0:32:28 > 0:32:29It's got to go.

0:32:29 > 0:32:31No. Pat put that up.

0:32:31 > 0:32:34All the fires in this Square and that survives.

0:32:34 > 0:32:36And look at that picture.

0:32:36 > 0:32:41Nice knockers but, Tyler, we are living in a pastel paradise.

0:32:41 > 0:32:44It ain't right. Ooh, Clarkson.

0:32:50 > 0:32:53THEY BOTH LAUGH

0:32:55 > 0:32:56# For another day

0:32:56 > 0:32:58# Let the music play

0:32:58 > 0:33:00# Down at Fraggle Rock...

0:33:04 > 0:33:05You won't remember Sean,

0:33:05 > 0:33:08but he loved the Fraggles when he was your age.

0:33:08 > 0:33:11Singing. With those red things... Do...

0:33:11 > 0:33:14- Doozer.- Doozer!

0:33:14 > 0:33:16THEY LAUGH

0:33:18 > 0:33:21Thanks, I feel better today.

0:33:23 > 0:33:26- Thank you for being on my side. - That's all right.

0:33:26 > 0:33:30I think, yeah, I think I can look Michael in the eye.

0:33:32 > 0:33:35Jean, you're not seriously going to work, are you?

0:33:35 > 0:33:37Yeah, well, I've done nothing wrong.

0:33:37 > 0:33:40If I don't go in, it'll look like I've got something to hide.

0:33:40 > 0:33:42I'm not going to let him win.

0:33:46 > 0:33:49I am such an idiot.

0:33:50 > 0:33:52Cos I've sussed him.

0:33:52 > 0:33:55He didn't pay me the slightest bit of attention

0:33:55 > 0:33:57until he found out that I had money.

0:33:57 > 0:33:59And then suddenly... all this interest and help.

0:34:02 > 0:34:06I told him things about my life, Roxy.

0:34:06 > 0:34:08I feel such an idiot.

0:34:09 > 0:34:10I know... I know.

0:34:10 > 0:34:13Now look, look, the banks open again today, don't they?

0:34:13 > 0:34:16So we will prove that you transferred that money. We will.

0:34:20 > 0:34:23I paid him cash. Don't say anything...

0:34:25 > 0:34:27Because I've thought of a way to prove it.

0:34:27 > 0:34:29Oh... Go on then.

0:34:29 > 0:34:31Right.

0:34:31 > 0:34:35All the paperwork that he showed me was printed off the computer.

0:34:35 > 0:34:39Spreadsheets, grant applications, legal things from the council,

0:34:39 > 0:34:41costings.

0:34:41 > 0:34:43They're all on his computer at the gym.

0:34:46 > 0:34:48Well, you're going to have to break in there

0:34:48 > 0:34:50and put it on one of those dingle, stick things.

0:34:55 > 0:34:58Phil! Phil! Why haven't you answered any of my calls?

0:34:58 > 0:35:02I've, uh, I've been on business. You heard from Ian?

0:35:02 > 0:35:04No. And Janine's on my back for money.

0:35:04 > 0:35:07Pay her another instalment, you know, fob her off...

0:35:07 > 0:35:10But I don't have that. And why isn't this thing working?

0:35:13 > 0:35:15Dad's left a mountain of debts.

0:35:15 > 0:35:19I don't think he paid a bill for months.

0:35:19 > 0:35:21Well, sell something, you know. You've got this place, ain't you?

0:35:21 > 0:35:24You've got the caff. Got the house. Got a couple of cars....

0:35:24 > 0:35:26That's had it, Luce.

0:35:26 > 0:35:28Can you fix it?

0:35:28 > 0:35:31I do cars. Not chips. Anyway, it'll be insured, won't it?

0:35:31 > 0:35:35Look, sell something, yeah? The house or whatever.

0:35:35 > 0:35:36I'll give you my solicitor's details.

0:35:36 > 0:35:38She'll sort out any paperwork.

0:35:38 > 0:35:41I'll sell Mandy's car but that's it.

0:35:41 > 0:35:44Dad's going to be back and I'll have everything here for him.

0:35:49 > 0:35:53I don't think you can go to nursery looking like this.

0:35:53 > 0:35:57And I think it's warm enough to do without, don't you?

0:35:58 > 0:36:00- Where's Lucy?- I don't know.

0:36:00 > 0:36:03I would watch your tills.

0:36:03 > 0:36:06I'm not the thief. You ought to listen to me.

0:36:06 > 0:36:09No. No, actually you should stop hanging around my fiance

0:36:09 > 0:36:11and begging him to call you Mummy.

0:36:11 > 0:36:14Oi, fatty, leave her alone!

0:36:14 > 0:36:17Please... don't tell me you actually believe her?

0:36:17 > 0:36:18You're monsters. Both of you.

0:36:18 > 0:36:20Listen, I employ you to mop up and shut up.

0:36:20 > 0:36:23If you can't do that, then I suggest you stay out of our lives.

0:36:23 > 0:36:26Oh, I'm not going anywhere.

0:36:26 > 0:36:28Cos you can't sack me for telling the truth.

0:36:37 > 0:36:40There you go. D'you know what?

0:36:40 > 0:36:43D'you know something, we're going to wipe the smirk off her face.

0:36:45 > 0:36:49I'll do it. I'll break into Michael's office.

0:36:49 > 0:36:51Cereal IS a continental breakfast, actually.

0:36:51 > 0:36:54I went to the continent and I had cereal...

0:36:54 > 0:36:55So what is it you wanted, eh?

0:36:55 > 0:36:57What, corgis and Rule Britannia in the mornings?

0:36:57 > 0:36:59Listen, you owe me, yeah.

0:36:59 > 0:37:01This is what you owe me. You better pay me!

0:37:01 > 0:37:03What do you mean, no? Listen. Don't drive...

0:37:03 > 0:37:05Hey, you owe me!

0:37:13 > 0:37:15What are being you off with me for?

0:37:15 > 0:37:18Where do I start? The bedroom's a tip, Tyler. You don't clean.

0:37:18 > 0:37:20You don't wash up. And everywhere I turn, Derek's there.

0:37:20 > 0:37:22Playing music by dead people.

0:37:22 > 0:37:24You've got some annoying things going on.

0:37:24 > 0:37:26- Oh yeah?- Yeah, that alarm clock of yours.

0:37:26 > 0:37:29MIMICS BEEPING Every ten minutes for an HOUR before we have to get up.

0:37:29 > 0:37:31That's not as annoying as Top Gear on the TV every night.

0:37:31 > 0:37:34Or pizza on the floor in the morning when I wake up.

0:37:34 > 0:37:38- Come on, Tyler, you said you were moving in to help me.- I am.

0:37:38 > 0:37:39Then start helping me, please.

0:37:42 > 0:37:45I think you owe my fiancee an apology after this morning's behaviour.

0:37:45 > 0:37:47- I just told her the truth. - Michael.

0:37:47 > 0:37:50- All right? - Where's Janine? We need a word.

0:37:50 > 0:37:54That's a tricky one. I don't want her stressed in her condition.

0:37:54 > 0:37:55What about me? And my condition?

0:37:57 > 0:38:00That's interesting. Look at that.

0:38:00 > 0:38:02Going through handbags now, are we?

0:38:02 > 0:38:05It was on the floor, empty. Someone's obviously...

0:38:05 > 0:38:07Why am I even bothering answering you? You don't scare me.

0:38:07 > 0:38:10Best lock that up nice and tight. Don't want anything else going missing.

0:38:10 > 0:38:12Are you having a go...

0:38:12 > 0:38:15- Jean, is he He having a go at my Lola?- I ain't nicked anything.

0:38:15 > 0:38:17Just go to Citizen's Advice, all right?

0:38:17 > 0:38:18Or one of them lawyers off of the telly,

0:38:18 > 0:38:20they'll tell you your rights.

0:38:20 > 0:38:23Janine's coming in this afternoon. We'll sort it out then.

0:38:23 > 0:38:27Good always triumphs. Always. Excuse me, I've got some cleaning to do.

0:38:30 > 0:38:33She's got you well under the thumb, ain't she?

0:38:33 > 0:38:34I'm really hungry!

0:38:34 > 0:38:38Just a minute, Bobby. But the insurance must cover it.

0:38:38 > 0:38:41That's a fortune. Well, when was it meant to be serviced?

0:38:41 > 0:38:44Look, there's no food at home.

0:38:44 > 0:38:45Thanks for nothing!

0:38:57 > 0:38:59Are you... are you going to talk to me?

0:39:01 > 0:39:03I'm not sure you'd like what I have to say.

0:39:08 > 0:39:12Don't just walk away from me. Argue. Tell me how you feel.

0:39:12 > 0:39:13Shout. Scream. Anything..

0:39:13 > 0:39:15I'm sorry. I'm sorry I'm not good enough for you.

0:39:15 > 0:39:18Tamwar?

0:39:18 > 0:39:19DOORBELL RINGS

0:39:22 > 0:39:25You know how you do curry in a hurry?

0:39:25 > 0:39:26Fine Indian cuisine.

0:39:26 > 0:39:29Yeah, whatever. Can you do dinner for 15?

0:39:29 > 0:39:30Ehh?

0:39:30 > 0:39:31Please?

0:40:07 > 0:40:08Last night...

0:40:08 > 0:40:09I don't want to talk about it.

0:40:09 > 0:40:11I know what's wrong with Afia.

0:40:13 > 0:40:14Me?

0:40:14 > 0:40:18No. You are a very good husband.

0:40:18 > 0:40:19HE SNORTS

0:40:19 > 0:40:21Afia is...

0:40:21 > 0:40:24She's young, you know. She's flighty.

0:40:26 > 0:40:30Tamwar, give her a baby.

0:40:32 > 0:40:33What?

0:40:33 > 0:40:35Just hear me out, all right?

0:40:37 > 0:40:41It will ground her, it will bond your marriage,

0:40:41 > 0:40:43it will let you build a new life.

0:40:45 > 0:40:47It's not until a woman becomes a mother

0:40:47 > 0:40:49that she ever really grows up.

0:40:59 > 0:41:02Where's Michael? I thought he was working here all day?

0:41:02 > 0:41:03Gone to the gym.

0:41:13 > 0:41:14PHONE RINGS

0:41:20 > 0:41:22Hello, Jean. Let me guess.

0:41:22 > 0:41:26Roxy's here to prove I'm the big bad bogeyman?

0:41:28 > 0:41:30You disappoint me, Roxy. I thought we were friends.

0:41:35 > 0:41:39Go and have a look on the computer. Go on. Password. Janine.

0:41:39 > 0:41:41Capital J. Be my guest

0:41:41 > 0:41:44You are using Jean. You are using her, like you used Ronnie.

0:41:44 > 0:41:48Ronnie, ah, OK. I wondered how she'd get her claws into you,

0:41:48 > 0:41:52that's quite clever, actually. Well, moderately clever.

0:41:52 > 0:41:54Go on.

0:41:54 > 0:41:56Have a seat. Have a seat.

0:41:56 > 0:41:58Come on!

0:41:59 > 0:42:01Fine.

0:42:02 > 0:42:06Let's try a few key words, a few search words. Jean.

0:42:06 > 0:42:08OK.

0:42:12 > 0:42:14No? Imaginary company.

0:42:16 > 0:42:18Big bad Michael took the money.

0:42:19 > 0:42:20HE LAUGHS

0:42:20 > 0:42:22It's not in there.

0:42:22 > 0:42:25The reason it isn't there is cos it's up there. It's in her head.

0:42:25 > 0:42:27I believe her.

0:42:28 > 0:42:30Well, you mustn't!

0:42:30 > 0:42:33And I would keep her away from Amy as well.

0:42:34 > 0:42:37Sorry, what's my daughter got to do with this?

0:42:37 > 0:42:39Everything. Cos you know how I found her this morning?

0:42:39 > 0:42:42- I found her staring into space... - Yeah?- Listen...

0:42:42 > 0:42:45Cradling Amy's cardigan. That's weird. It's weird. She's warped.

0:42:45 > 0:42:48You are weird. You are warped.

0:42:48 > 0:42:51I would never lie about Amy, now come on. Give me some credit.

0:42:51 > 0:42:54Janine's pregnancy, it's twisted her head.

0:42:54 > 0:42:56Right, OK. Will you just shut up.

0:42:56 > 0:43:00You know... All right, how about this.

0:43:00 > 0:43:02You know she wants me to call her mother.

0:43:03 > 0:43:07Yeah. She said she can't wait to be Nana Jean again.

0:43:07 > 0:43:09OK, I don't believe you.

0:43:09 > 0:43:12OK, that's fair enough.

0:43:12 > 0:43:16But you know she has a picture of Amy in her purse?

0:43:32 > 0:43:35He hasn't hurt you?

0:43:35 > 0:43:37No, no..

0:43:39 > 0:43:41You found the files, though?

0:43:41 > 0:43:44No. I'm sorry, Jean. I didn't.

0:43:44 > 0:43:46Oh, no!

0:43:46 > 0:43:48He's hidden them.

0:43:48 > 0:43:50No, no, he'll have deleted them...

0:43:50 > 0:43:52Yeah, I know. I know.

0:43:52 > 0:43:54I'm sorry, Jean. There was nothing...

0:44:08 > 0:44:11I'll fight for you. If that's what you want.

0:44:11 > 0:44:13I'd do anything for you.

0:44:14 > 0:44:18Tell me the truth. About what you really want in life.

0:44:18 > 0:44:20I want you. I love you.

0:44:22 > 0:44:23OK. I want a future with you.

0:44:23 > 0:44:25I want us to grow old together.

0:44:25 > 0:44:28We're not old yet. There's so many things we could do first...

0:44:28 > 0:44:32We will, we will. I want to help you put down roots

0:44:32 > 0:44:34and build a life with me.

0:44:37 > 0:44:40And I think maybe we should take the next step.

0:44:41 > 0:44:43What do you mean?

0:44:46 > 0:44:49Maybe we should have a baby.

0:44:55 > 0:44:58Your mum's ring? Are you sure about this?

0:44:58 > 0:45:02She'd want me to. It's just a ring.

0:45:02 > 0:45:05- Is everything OK, Luce? - Just take it.

0:45:05 > 0:45:07Hey, that's my stuff!

0:45:07 > 0:45:10Bobby. You'll have to be brave. I'm just selling a few things.

0:45:10 > 0:45:14- Do you want to change your mind? - Just take it, all right.- Yeah.

0:45:14 > 0:45:16He's taking my stuff!

0:45:16 > 0:45:19Look, Bobby, I have to. Please, Tyler, can you just go.

0:45:20 > 0:45:21Bobby, mate.

0:45:21 > 0:45:24HE STAMPS UP THE STAIRS

0:45:26 > 0:45:29He's asked her. I knew my idea would work.

0:45:29 > 0:45:30Really?

0:45:30 > 0:45:33Oh, another little grandchild. Another little face to kiss.

0:45:33 > 0:45:37Oh, thank you, I'm so thrilled.

0:45:41 > 0:45:43Do I say congratulations?

0:45:43 > 0:45:45Yeah...

0:45:45 > 0:45:47Come on, Tam. Let's go out. Let's go for a walk.

0:45:49 > 0:45:54You know, Luce, you can talk to me any time you need, OK?

0:45:54 > 0:45:57Fat's got your back.

0:45:57 > 0:46:00So, when is Ian coming home?

0:46:03 > 0:46:05OK, all right...

0:46:05 > 0:46:08So, how are things with you and Bobby?

0:46:08 > 0:46:09Bobby.

0:46:11 > 0:46:13Where's Bobby?

0:46:14 > 0:46:17Bobby? Bobby?

0:46:24 > 0:46:25Bobby?

0:46:27 > 0:46:28Bobby Beale?

0:46:32 > 0:46:35Ah! Now, this won't do.

0:46:35 > 0:46:37This won't do at all.

0:46:37 > 0:46:43Personally, I find the world looks much brighter after an ice-cream.

0:46:43 > 0:46:45Do you want me to treat you to one?

0:46:48 > 0:46:51And then me and you will have a chat. Man to man.

0:46:51 > 0:46:55And you can tell me all your problems, yeah, eh?

0:46:55 > 0:46:57Come on, come with me.

0:47:00 > 0:47:02Good boy, that's it.

0:47:06 > 0:47:07Do you want this child?

0:47:07 > 0:47:09I want my marriage to work.

0:47:09 > 0:47:13I loved you, Tam, from the moment I held you in my arms.

0:47:13 > 0:47:15But being a parent, it's not easy.

0:47:15 > 0:47:18I know, it's just Mum reckons it's going to heal us.

0:47:18 > 0:47:19You know, it'll make her proud.

0:47:19 > 0:47:22Well, you make me proud every day.

0:47:22 > 0:47:23Do I?

0:47:23 > 0:47:26Yeah, you're a wonderful son, Tam. You deserve to be happy.

0:47:26 > 0:47:29But don't have a child just to please your mother.

0:47:29 > 0:47:32What's the matter with you?

0:47:32 > 0:47:36You have one because it's your dream.

0:47:36 > 0:47:37Afia's.

0:47:38 > 0:47:41You know, becoming a parent is the most important thing

0:47:41 > 0:47:43you'll ever do in your life.

0:47:44 > 0:47:47Just make sure it's what you both want.

0:48:01 > 0:48:05Jean. Have you seen Amy's cardigan anywhere?

0:48:05 > 0:48:07Oh, covered in chocolate and I've left it at work.

0:48:07 > 0:48:09I'm so sorry, I meant to...

0:48:12 > 0:48:13Are you OK?

0:48:17 > 0:48:19Michael's said something, hasn't he?

0:48:20 > 0:48:21Yeah, he has.

0:48:24 > 0:48:25Oh, Jean. Umm...

0:48:28 > 0:48:31He said that you carry pictures of Amy in your purse.

0:48:42 > 0:48:45I've got my whole family in here.

0:48:45 > 0:48:49Stacey and Lily...

0:48:49 > 0:48:50Sean...

0:48:50 > 0:48:53You.

0:48:53 > 0:48:56I've carried that photo since the day it was taken.

0:48:56 > 0:48:58I know things have changed but I couldn't bear to throw it away

0:48:58 > 0:49:02because, on that day, Sean was happy.

0:49:02 > 0:49:06And I like to look at him smiling every single day.

0:49:09 > 0:49:13Lola wouldn't nick on the job. Baby bracelets? Family stuff?

0:49:13 > 0:49:14That's sick.

0:49:14 > 0:49:16And she'd never pinch your handbag.

0:49:16 > 0:49:18A designer one? You sure?

0:49:18 > 0:49:20Someone could have picked it up by mistake.

0:49:20 > 0:49:22They all look the same, don't they.

0:49:22 > 0:49:24It was bright pink tartan, actually.

0:49:24 > 0:49:26Pink tartan?

0:49:26 > 0:49:29You got a key to Jean's locker?

0:49:33 > 0:49:37Hang on, no, no... this is her private property.

0:49:37 > 0:49:38You can't just...

0:49:38 > 0:49:41Look, Jean had a pink bag in here. This morning.

0:49:41 > 0:49:44You was there, Michael.

0:49:44 > 0:49:46She stole my bag.

0:49:46 > 0:49:48SHE GASPS

0:49:48 > 0:49:53Jean stole my bag!

0:49:58 > 0:50:01Bobby! Bobby!

0:50:04 > 0:50:07Phil, I can't find Bobby. I'm losing everyone.

0:50:07 > 0:50:09He's probably just with his mates or something.

0:50:09 > 0:50:13No, he's run off because I sold all his things. All our things.

0:50:13 > 0:50:15You've got to start selling Ian's things. Not yours.

0:50:15 > 0:50:17- He ain't here, you are. - He'll be here. Soon.

0:50:17 > 0:50:19You want me to be honest with you?

0:50:19 > 0:50:22Well, I've been looking for Ian these past few days...

0:50:22 > 0:50:25And if he wanted to be found, he'd have been found by now.

0:50:27 > 0:50:28Here he is.

0:50:31 > 0:50:32Don't ever do that to me again, OK.

0:50:32 > 0:50:34I'm sorry.

0:50:34 > 0:50:37He's all right. He was stuffing his face full of choc ices in the caff.

0:50:37 > 0:50:38Thanks, Fats.

0:50:38 > 0:50:41We've been having a little chat, me and Bobby. You all right?

0:50:41 > 0:50:43Come on. Home.

0:50:51 > 0:50:56Certainly got its perks, this new job.

0:50:56 > 0:51:00You sure I can't help you with your delicates, darling?

0:51:00 > 0:51:01I am trained.

0:51:01 > 0:51:03Maybe next time.

0:51:03 > 0:51:05SHE LAUGHS

0:51:05 > 0:51:07Nice...

0:51:07 > 0:51:09Kim?

0:51:11 > 0:51:12Hey.

0:51:12 > 0:51:14Hello, babe.

0:51:14 > 0:51:16Is this Tiff's?

0:51:18 > 0:51:22That's my jumper! You've ruined it, Tyler! What have you..?

0:51:22 > 0:51:24Pat bought that for me!

0:51:24 > 0:51:27We'll go out this evening. You can start trying right away.

0:51:27 > 0:51:29Mum...

0:51:29 > 0:51:32Come on, we have to make plans. Financial plans.

0:51:32 > 0:51:35You will have to drop college.

0:51:35 > 0:51:36Drop? I'm not going to college.

0:51:36 > 0:51:39They called for you, all right? They asked for you.

0:51:39 > 0:51:40What did they say?

0:51:40 > 0:51:43That he'd applied for a course. Your secret's out, Tam.

0:51:43 > 0:51:45- I didn't apply.- You liar! You lied to me.

0:51:45 > 0:51:48And, what, now you think you're ready to become a father?

0:51:48 > 0:51:50- I haven't applied...- All right. He's not lying.

0:51:50 > 0:51:52It's not Tam that's going to college, it's me.

0:51:57 > 0:52:01I can't face checking in at the Butchers'.

0:52:01 > 0:52:04Not with them knowing that they've won.

0:52:05 > 0:52:08How am I going to tell Alfie?

0:52:08 > 0:52:11I've let him down so badly.

0:52:15 > 0:52:16You going to snap my head off?

0:52:16 > 0:52:18No, I'm going to ask if you're OK?

0:52:19 > 0:52:22Those two punters driving off this morning.

0:52:22 > 0:52:24Looked like they were giving you a hard time.

0:52:24 > 0:52:26No that wasn't a hard time.

0:52:26 > 0:52:29My sister telling me I'm fit for nothing. That's a hard time.

0:52:29 > 0:52:30Yeah. I'm sorry.

0:52:30 > 0:52:32What? Can't hear you.

0:52:32 > 0:52:34Well, you said stuff too.

0:52:34 > 0:52:36I'm sorry.

0:52:36 > 0:52:38What? Can't hear you.

0:52:38 > 0:52:42Anyway, I've bought you a little peace offering.

0:52:42 > 0:52:45Sorry, it's from the Minute Mart. I know it might be beneath you.

0:52:45 > 0:52:47Mmmm.

0:52:52 > 0:52:54I am so tempted to tell you where to shove it.

0:52:54 > 0:52:57But if you want to do a bit of scrubbing to apologise,

0:52:57 > 0:53:00- I could be magnanimous. - See, there you go. You do need me?

0:53:00 > 0:53:01Come on, admit it.

0:53:01 > 0:53:05No. I don't need you. But I do miss you.

0:53:05 > 0:53:06Really?

0:53:06 > 0:53:10Yeah. Well, it's no fun shouting at the customers, innit,

0:53:10 > 0:53:13without you being there with your disapproving face.

0:53:14 > 0:53:18And besides, who am I going to call to pull me out the skip?

0:53:18 > 0:53:21Come back? Please.

0:53:23 > 0:53:27Here, look. Says here "thick but directable".

0:53:27 > 0:53:28You've got a lot in common.

0:53:30 > 0:53:36You lying, thieving, witch! I'm going to have you arrested.

0:53:39 > 0:53:41All this time, scheming, lying...

0:53:41 > 0:53:45D'you think I like shoving letters through doors every day?

0:53:45 > 0:53:47I need to use my brain.

0:53:47 > 0:53:50What, teaching Tiffany Butcher? That's using your brain, is it?

0:53:50 > 0:53:53I didn't kiss that guy, you know.

0:53:53 > 0:53:55I'd never do that to you.

0:53:55 > 0:53:57I know. I know you wouldn't.

0:53:57 > 0:54:00But then why would you say that? Why would you put me through that?

0:54:00 > 0:54:03I thought you were lying. About college.

0:54:04 > 0:54:08Living your dreams without bothering to ask me what mine were.

0:54:08 > 0:54:09ARGUING IN THE BACKGROUND

0:54:09 > 0:54:12So what are they, Afia?

0:54:13 > 0:54:16Be honest with me.

0:54:17 > 0:54:19I dunno...

0:54:19 > 0:54:22It's just....

0:54:22 > 0:54:28It's like there's a life out there, an adventure we should be having.

0:54:30 > 0:54:34And I don't feel like it's here in Walford.

0:54:34 > 0:54:39I just feel like I can't be happy.

0:54:40 > 0:54:44I'm not saying that. I'm just saying make up your mind

0:54:44 > 0:54:47whether you want to be a postman or a maths teacher.

0:54:47 > 0:54:49It had my purse in it. My bank cards. My phone...

0:54:49 > 0:54:51And you knew it was mine!

0:54:51 > 0:54:54No, no, no, it was empty. When I found it, it was on the floor.

0:54:54 > 0:54:58- Billy you saw me.- Sorry, Jean. I only saw you put it in the locker.

0:54:58 > 0:55:00That's because you told me to.

0:55:00 > 0:55:02Is this Amy's?

0:55:03 > 0:55:04I told you. I told you it was dirty.

0:55:04 > 0:55:08- It's fine, it's fine. I believe you, OK.- Yeah, well...

0:55:08 > 0:55:11We're going to see what the police think about that.

0:55:11 > 0:55:14- No you don't!- Why don't we just take this somewhere private? Upstairs?

0:55:18 > 0:55:20ANGRY FOOTSTEPS

0:55:26 > 0:55:28Trouble in paradise?

0:55:28 > 0:55:31I've ruined her jumper. I've said sorry.

0:55:31 > 0:55:33Apology not accepted, I take it?

0:55:35 > 0:55:36She's deleted Top Gear!

0:55:44 > 0:55:46Can't just come barging in here accusing her...

0:55:46 > 0:55:48She had the bag, Mo. She had it in her locker!

0:55:48 > 0:55:51- She needs to be locked up.- Janine, it's no way to handle it. Just be cool.

0:55:51 > 0:55:54You'll wake Amy, anyway. Just shush.

0:55:54 > 0:55:56Amy's not here, she's with Jack, all right.

0:55:56 > 0:55:58MUSIC PLAYS

0:55:58 > 0:55:59Amy?

0:55:59 > 0:56:02What's Amy doing in my bedroom?

0:56:24 > 0:56:27Amy's christening bracelet, what...

0:56:28 > 0:56:31Why are my daughter's things in your room, Jean?

0:56:31 > 0:56:33No, I didn't put them there...

0:56:36 > 0:56:39It was you.

0:56:39 > 0:56:42She's had everything. Everything Lola got the blame for.

0:56:42 > 0:56:48Michael! You stay away from me and you stay away from my family.

0:56:48 > 0:56:50I didn't take it.

0:56:57 > 0:56:59I-I didn't put any of that there!

0:57:04 > 0:57:06I didn't take it.

0:57:06 > 0:57:08You have to believe me.

0:57:22 > 0:57:25Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd