28/11/2016

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0:00:30 > 0:00:32You need to get a new hobby, love.

0:00:33 > 0:00:35Agnes Novak, Environmental Health.

0:00:38 > 0:00:41We had a complaint about the cafe. May I come in?

0:00:44 > 0:00:46Ugh! So much for Carmel's War on Bins.

0:00:46 > 0:00:48Listen, unless you want me to puke on the stock,

0:00:48 > 0:00:50please don't mention the smell.

0:00:50 > 0:00:53Yeah, I got a message to call Gary?

0:00:53 > 0:00:54Is it sunny today, is it?

0:00:54 > 0:00:56You given the kids the day off or something?

0:00:56 > 0:00:59No, I dropped them at Honey's and she's going to take them in.

0:00:59 > 0:01:01Listen, have you got anything colourful for Ricky's costume?

0:01:01 > 0:01:03Get in there!

0:01:04 > 0:01:06Just the, uh, Fantasy football. I'm top of the league!

0:01:06 > 0:01:08You could try Lloyd's stall.

0:01:08 > 0:01:10He's got a bunch of new velvety and sequin stuff in.

0:01:10 > 0:01:12Is Ricky one of the kings?

0:01:12 > 0:01:14Oh, minted. How appropriate!

0:01:14 > 0:01:17Yeah, he's Caspar. Listen, have you heard from Phil?

0:01:17 > 0:01:19I mean, I tried texting him but...

0:01:19 > 0:01:20Well, you know Phil,

0:01:20 > 0:01:23he'll be settling in, won't he? Making friends.

0:01:23 > 0:01:26Don't worry, OK, he'll be giving you away in no time.

0:01:28 > 0:01:30Right, Lloyd it is, then. See you later?

0:01:30 > 0:01:32- Yeah.- Bye.

0:01:34 > 0:01:36Our offer's been accepted.

0:01:36 > 0:01:37On the house?!

0:01:37 > 0:01:39We're moving to Ongar!

0:01:40 > 0:01:42Did Dad text you, too?

0:01:42 > 0:01:44He's been in the Royal Free one night.

0:01:44 > 0:01:47The staff have been so helpful and Phil still hates them.

0:01:49 > 0:01:51He will make it work, won't he?

0:01:51 > 0:01:53Yeah. Yeah, of course.

0:01:53 > 0:01:55Great.

0:01:55 > 0:01:57Look, he's just nervous, Louise, that's all.

0:01:57 > 0:01:59And you are not leaving that washing up.

0:01:59 > 0:02:01That was all Roxy's from last night!

0:02:01 > 0:02:03Well, looks like she owes you one, then.

0:02:03 > 0:02:07No arguments. I've got a lot to do before visiting hours.

0:02:07 > 0:02:10She sponges off us and she doesn't even clear up after herself.

0:02:10 > 0:02:12Oh, she's sponging off you, is she?

0:02:12 > 0:02:15You been paying the bills round here without telling us?

0:02:18 > 0:02:20Right, she is not going anywhere until she's dried and put

0:02:20 > 0:02:22- them dishes away. - I'll be late for school!

0:02:22 > 0:02:23I shall see you tonight.

0:02:25 > 0:02:27- Look, here, I'll help.- Thanks.

0:02:27 > 0:02:29How's your dad been?

0:02:31 > 0:02:33Uh... Have you...?

0:02:33 > 0:02:36- Why aren't you wearing your bracelet?- No, we haven't!

0:02:36 > 0:02:39- Shakil!- What? I just haven't put it on yet!

0:02:43 > 0:02:46Hope your fingernails ain't in their usual state.

0:02:46 > 0:02:48Environmental Health spot check.

0:02:48 > 0:02:50Oh, no! That's why Kathy called me in.

0:02:50 > 0:02:52I'm never going to get a pay rise now.

0:02:52 > 0:02:53Good luck with that.

0:02:53 > 0:02:55If we don't all start bringing some money in,

0:02:55 > 0:02:58we're not going to have enough money for mum's respite care, all right?

0:02:58 > 0:03:01- So wish me luck.- Oh, uh, Tina? Can you get in here, please?

0:03:11 > 0:03:14I heard it's something to do with dysentery.

0:03:17 > 0:03:18I got here as quick as I could.

0:03:18 > 0:03:20You lot have got some front.

0:03:20 > 0:03:23We wouldn't normally respond to complaints, but it's super

0:03:23 > 0:03:25close to your scheduled inspection, so...

0:03:25 > 0:03:27The reason my bins are in a state is cos the residents put their

0:03:27 > 0:03:30bags in them. And that is because you, the council,

0:03:30 > 0:03:31refuse to collect theirs.

0:03:31 > 0:03:35Actually, bin collection is no longer run by us, thank heavens!

0:03:36 > 0:03:39Now I'm here, I might as well check a few things.

0:03:39 > 0:03:43Tina, is it? Oh, I love your trainers!

0:03:43 > 0:03:47Could you explain food storage procedure, please?

0:03:47 > 0:03:49(There's a procedure?)

0:03:51 > 0:03:53'Thanks for coming round so quick.'

0:03:53 > 0:03:55Take a seat in there - I'll get us a coffee.

0:03:55 > 0:03:59Uh, excuse me? What is she doing here?

0:03:59 > 0:04:02Well, she's here to give us a valuation on this place.

0:04:02 > 0:04:04Well, what do we need a valuation for?

0:04:04 > 0:04:05Well, the more assets we got,

0:04:05 > 0:04:07the more likely we are to get a mortgage.

0:04:07 > 0:04:10But you've already had one agreed in principle, haven't you?

0:04:10 > 0:04:12Yes, but that was for a buy to let - this one's for a residential one.

0:04:12 > 0:04:15OK? Is that interrogation over?

0:04:15 > 0:04:18Uh, excuse me. I did not say that it's OK to sell my house.

0:04:18 > 0:04:22- And nor did Roxy.- Ron, it's just a valuation that's all.

0:04:22 > 0:04:24All right?

0:04:24 > 0:04:26Do you want some milk and sugar?

0:04:28 > 0:04:32Mrs Branning! I need a repair.

0:04:32 > 0:04:33I got it caught on a nail at work, look.

0:04:33 > 0:04:35Oh, I'm sorry but we don't do...

0:04:36 > 0:04:40Look! This ain't a tear, it's a cut.

0:04:40 > 0:04:43Yeah, yeah, I just really need it fixing.

0:04:43 > 0:04:44Yes, but we don't do....

0:04:44 > 0:04:47Um, if it were alongside the seam, I might be able.

0:04:47 > 0:04:50But I'm sorry, this is a lost cause.

0:04:50 > 0:04:51So I've gotta get a new one? Oh!

0:04:51 > 0:04:53I don't believe this. When does it stop?

0:04:53 > 0:04:56Wait, I tell you what, can you at least give it a try?

0:04:56 > 0:04:59Please, please, please. Thank you, Mrs Branning.

0:04:59 > 0:05:02- I'll see you later, I really appreciate it. Bye!- Oh, I say.

0:05:02 > 0:05:06So, all the sandwich ingredients are prepped the night before,

0:05:06 > 0:05:08and then they're stored in the fridge.

0:05:08 > 0:05:09And the bacon, the raw meat?

0:05:09 > 0:05:11Yeah, yeah, yeah, it all goes in the fridge, too.

0:05:11 > 0:05:13- In what order? - She means how the cooked food...

0:05:13 > 0:05:15Sorry, Kath.

0:05:15 > 0:05:17Right now, I'm just super interested

0:05:17 > 0:05:19in the standard of your staff training.

0:05:19 > 0:05:23It just...it just all goes in the fridge, right?

0:05:23 > 0:05:25The perishables, so to speak.

0:05:25 > 0:05:27Thank you, Tina.

0:05:32 > 0:05:36I'm going to recommend you for one of our training courses.

0:05:36 > 0:05:38You're responsible for your staff.

0:05:38 > 0:05:41They should know cooked food is stored above raw food.

0:05:41 > 0:05:43That's just common sense, surely?

0:05:46 > 0:05:50- We'd be very happy with that. I'll be in touch.- Bye.- Bye.

0:05:52 > 0:05:53Did you hear that?

0:05:53 > 0:05:56We make that much money from this place, we'd laughing!

0:05:56 > 0:05:59- Just a valuation.- Ron, we can't ignore money like that.

0:05:59 > 0:06:01I agreed to move, not sell my home.

0:06:01 > 0:06:03Well, your home's in Ongar now.

0:06:03 > 0:06:06So you need to see this house for what it is - an asset.

0:06:06 > 0:06:08Roxy's not going to see it as an asset.

0:06:08 > 0:06:09I think she will when she gets her cut.

0:06:09 > 0:06:12I mean, considering she ain't paid the mortgage in, like, forever.

0:06:12 > 0:06:14How long have you been planning this?

0:06:14 > 0:06:18Babe, I had the offer accepted, I made a few calls. That's all.

0:06:18 > 0:06:21Look, if you don't want to sell, then, OK, it's possible,

0:06:21 > 0:06:24with a much bigger mortgage and much more interest.

0:06:24 > 0:06:26That means less money for me, you and the kids.

0:06:26 > 0:06:28I mean, what's really the problem here?

0:06:28 > 0:06:31First we take her daughter, then we sell her house.

0:06:31 > 0:06:33- I don't think she'll even notice. - Jack!

0:06:33 > 0:06:35Ron, come on, it was a joke!

0:06:35 > 0:06:39Look, you've got to see this is good for Roxy, too.

0:06:39 > 0:06:42And you better start working a way in which you're going to tell her.

0:06:42 > 0:06:44No! No, this is your idea.

0:06:44 > 0:06:46No, diplomacy is your department.

0:06:46 > 0:06:48I'm the shark that's going to make us all

0:06:48 > 0:06:50a nice tidy wedge from this asset.

0:06:50 > 0:06:52Have you lost something?

0:06:52 > 0:06:53No.

0:06:53 > 0:06:55No. See you later.

0:07:02 > 0:07:04I've got to borrow some bacon.

0:07:04 > 0:07:06That food bod from the council made us chuck ours out

0:07:06 > 0:07:08cos it was one day out of date.

0:07:08 > 0:07:10Kitchen's closed on a Monday.

0:07:10 > 0:07:12Yeah, well, it's me and I'm family.

0:07:12 > 0:07:15Never been a fan of nepotism.

0:07:15 > 0:07:17Take it the inspection didn't go well?

0:07:17 > 0:07:20It's Ian's fault. He never said what went where in the fridge.

0:07:20 > 0:07:21Didn't get the raise, then?

0:07:21 > 0:07:23I never asked. Kathy's in a right bad mood.

0:07:23 > 0:07:26I've got to revise procedures all day.

0:07:26 > 0:07:28She won't be your boss much longer.

0:07:29 > 0:07:30"That the council?

0:07:30 > 0:07:32"I'm ever so concerned about the bins

0:07:32 > 0:07:34"outside the cafe on Bridge Street.

0:07:34 > 0:07:37- "My kids eat there." You- made the complaint?

0:07:37 > 0:07:41I've applied to open up the Vic earlier. "Babe's Breakfasts"!

0:07:41 > 0:07:44Should be a tidy earner. Once the competition's out the way.

0:07:44 > 0:07:46You should come work for me.

0:07:46 > 0:07:48Babe, stop! Ian's been good to me.

0:07:48 > 0:07:53Oh. Sacking you was in your best interests, was it?

0:07:53 > 0:07:58Mick! Mick! Do you know about Babe applying to have breakfasts here?

0:07:58 > 0:08:01No, because that would mean having a variation of hours

0:08:01 > 0:08:04application, which only me and Linda can apply for.

0:08:04 > 0:08:09Unless...she's been forging our signatures.

0:08:09 > 0:08:12I'll leave you to explain, Babe. I need to get bacon.

0:08:12 > 0:08:14We've run out. For some reason.

0:08:14 > 0:08:16Kitchen's closed Mondays!

0:08:20 > 0:08:22Oh, them stairs.

0:08:22 > 0:08:25Oh, Whitney! Ooh, you nearly gave me a fright.

0:08:25 > 0:08:30You can tell Lee that I've done it ahead of schedule, so he can relax.

0:08:30 > 0:08:33- Hi, Dot. What have you done? - His jacket.

0:08:33 > 0:08:37And you can tell him it weren't a tear - it was a cut.

0:08:37 > 0:08:38Well, why didn't he ask me to do it?

0:08:38 > 0:08:42Well, I expect, you know, he thought I was more experienced.

0:08:42 > 0:08:45- Did you really do this? - Yes.

0:08:45 > 0:08:48There's no-one this side of Tower Hamlets who's as good as me.

0:08:51 > 0:08:53I knew it.

0:08:53 > 0:08:57It's them strip lights in the launderette, they're on the blink.

0:08:57 > 0:08:59I could hardly see my feet this morning when I was sweeping up.

0:08:59 > 0:09:01Well, don't worry, I'll get it sorted.

0:09:01 > 0:09:03- No, no, no! Dot, I can do it. - No, no, I'll do it. No, no.

0:09:03 > 0:09:05- I can do it! - Thank you.

0:09:08 > 0:09:10A pantomime horse, Geraldine?

0:09:10 > 0:09:12I mean, given my considerable experience...

0:09:12 > 0:09:15Front or back, I don't care. Fight it out with Kathy.

0:09:19 > 0:09:20Sorry.

0:09:21 > 0:09:23Do we know who's playing Scrooge yet?

0:09:26 > 0:09:27The cages were full at work.

0:09:29 > 0:09:32So. "To London.

0:09:32 > 0:09:36"Dickens' Magic Lantern was a hard place,

0:09:36 > 0:09:39"ravaged by social inequality and disease."

0:09:39 > 0:09:41Somebody's been at the Wikipedia.

0:09:42 > 0:09:45"Where architectural monuments

0:09:45 > 0:09:49"to empire towered over squalid slums."

0:09:49 > 0:09:52And evil inspectors ruin the lives of poor coffee shop owners.

0:09:52 > 0:09:55"Through this Magic Lantern walks Scrooge,

0:09:55 > 0:09:59"a man to whom no man wishes good day,

0:09:59 > 0:10:01"no child enquires the time."

0:10:03 > 0:10:05GASPS AND CHATTER

0:10:05 > 0:10:08"And Scrooge liked it that way,

0:10:08 > 0:10:10"immune as he was to human sympathy."

0:10:10 > 0:10:13- He's playing Scrooge? - He doesn't have the chops!

0:10:13 > 0:10:15- He's fit, though.- What?

0:10:15 > 0:10:17Oh, not that Scrooge needs to be fit.

0:10:17 > 0:10:20Yeah, yeah, but he reading Geraldine's script, man?

0:10:20 > 0:10:22That is going to be painful.

0:10:22 > 0:10:26"Merry Christmas! 'Umbug!

0:10:26 > 0:10:29"I hates Christmas I do, 'ates it!

0:10:30 > 0:10:33"Waste of time and moo-la-a-ah!"

0:10:33 > 0:10:36THEY LAUGH

0:10:56 > 0:10:58TEXT TONE ON PHONE

0:11:04 > 0:11:06- Hey, you. - Yeah, you all right?

0:11:06 > 0:11:09- You all right?- Mm-hm. - Give us a kiss.

0:11:09 > 0:11:14- Ooh. You been drinking? - Yeah, I just had a few after work.

0:11:14 > 0:11:16What, you're necking cans down the park now, are you?

0:11:16 > 0:11:18What's with the interrogation?

0:11:18 > 0:11:21I'm only joking. What's happened?

0:11:22 > 0:11:24The payroll system's down,

0:11:24 > 0:11:26so it don't look like we're all going to get paid until next week.

0:11:26 > 0:11:28But I thought you got an advance?

0:11:28 > 0:11:31Yeah, that's on my basic wage, it don't include commission.

0:11:31 > 0:11:32Did you want that?

0:11:32 > 0:11:34Yeah, please.

0:11:34 > 0:11:36Well, that ain't a disaster, is it?

0:11:36 > 0:11:38Not everyone gets paid the same I do.

0:11:38 > 0:11:40A week to some means missing out on their rent.

0:11:40 > 0:11:44Yeah. No, I'm sorry, you're right, of course not. I'm being selfish.

0:11:44 > 0:11:46We can tighten our belts a bit, I suppose.

0:11:46 > 0:11:48It's Christmas, in case you ain't noticed.

0:11:48 > 0:11:50No, you've already spent enough on that, Lee.

0:11:50 > 0:11:53Oi, listen. You are going to have the best December on record. Fact.

0:11:53 > 0:11:57Oh, Dot came over... Ow!

0:11:57 > 0:11:59Dot came over earlier with your suit jacket.

0:11:59 > 0:12:00It was torn or something.

0:12:00 > 0:12:02Yeah, yeah, I caught it on a nail at work.

0:12:02 > 0:12:05- Why didn't you ask me to fix it? - You've got enough on your plate.

0:12:05 > 0:12:07You're joking, ain't you? I've spent all day choosing between

0:12:07 > 0:12:10Sherbert Lemon and Lilac Dreams!

0:12:10 > 0:12:12So where is it, the jacket?

0:12:12 > 0:12:14She took it away again to fix it.

0:12:16 > 0:12:20- Can't rely on anyone, can you? - Huh? Lee?!

0:12:22 > 0:12:24Shakil, you can run but you can't hide.

0:12:24 > 0:12:27What was the park like 100 years ago?

0:12:27 > 0:12:30I dunno. Probably a plague pit.

0:12:30 > 0:12:33- Sharon back yet?- Any minute. - Today go any better?

0:12:33 > 0:12:35How should I know, I'm just his daughter.

0:12:35 > 0:12:37- What's a plague pit!?- I don't know.

0:12:37 > 0:12:39Look, I've just got in from a hard day's graft.

0:12:39 > 0:12:40Please give me a break, yeah?

0:12:40 > 0:12:43Mummy's been partying all weekend, give her a break.

0:12:46 > 0:12:49Shakil, I know why you weren't wearing your bracelet

0:12:49 > 0:12:51this morning, all right? Snap back!

0:12:54 > 0:12:59It's so exciting to see my writing brought to life with such nuance!

0:13:01 > 0:13:04Geraldine, Geraldine. Look, man.

0:13:04 > 0:13:06You appear to have cut my line.

0:13:06 > 0:13:09While that plank of wood takes centre stage.

0:13:09 > 0:13:10Oi! You got a problem, pal?

0:13:10 > 0:13:14Me, no problem, no. Violence is the preserve of fascists and bullies!

0:13:14 > 0:13:17Keith is not a fascist, Derek. If you've got a problem, leave!

0:13:17 > 0:13:19Oi! Oi! Hang on a minute.

0:13:19 > 0:13:23This is supposed to be a nice community charity event.

0:13:23 > 0:13:25Stop sacking everyone all the time.

0:13:25 > 0:13:28Actually, the money isn't going to the children's unit any more -

0:13:28 > 0:13:29administrative issues.

0:13:29 > 0:13:33- Well, where's it going, then? - What's that?!

0:13:33 > 0:13:35Oh, uh, this is Freddie Mercury. He was abandoned.

0:13:35 > 0:13:37Where's the cash going, Geraldine?

0:13:37 > 0:13:40I want it out of here right now!

0:13:40 > 0:13:43KNOCK ON DOOR

0:13:43 > 0:13:45Who is it?

0:13:45 > 0:13:47- 'It's Lee Carter!'- Well, hold on.

0:13:57 > 0:14:00Mrs Branning, why did you tell Whitney about my jacket?

0:14:00 > 0:14:02Well, you said it was urgent.

0:14:02 > 0:14:04Don't you come in here shouting the odds at this time of night.

0:14:04 > 0:14:06- It's just I didn't want her to... - I shall have a word

0:14:06 > 0:14:08- with your parents. - Mrs Branning, look.

0:14:08 > 0:14:11OK, I'm sorry. Can I just get my jacket, please?

0:14:11 > 0:14:13It's on the sofa.

0:14:13 > 0:14:16I'll pay you as soon as my wages come in, all right?

0:14:16 > 0:14:19I don't want no money, I ain't an invisible mender.

0:14:19 > 0:14:21I done it as a favour.

0:14:21 > 0:14:23Thank you. Thank you.

0:14:26 > 0:14:28# I see a little silhouetto of a man

0:14:28 > 0:14:30# Scaramouch, scaramouch

0:14:30 > 0:14:32# Will you do the Fandango?... #

0:14:32 > 0:14:35- This is mortifying. - Well, you came up with his name!

0:14:35 > 0:14:38Yeah, well, all our abandoned pets get named after rock stars.

0:14:38 > 0:14:41And how does Dot feel about Freddie Mercury moving in?

0:14:41 > 0:14:43- Oh, she'll be fine. - You better take care of her.

0:14:43 > 0:14:45She's not as strong as you think.

0:14:45 > 0:14:47Here we go.

0:14:47 > 0:14:49So, where is the money going?

0:14:49 > 0:14:51Oh, same as my lines, I suspect.

0:14:51 > 0:14:53Into the never-never.

0:14:53 > 0:14:57I have trodden the boards with many a Geraldine over the years.

0:14:57 > 0:15:00What they lack in artistic merit they usually make up for with

0:15:00 > 0:15:02a Stalinesque tyranny.

0:15:02 > 0:15:04Yeah, well, she ain't getting away with it.

0:15:04 > 0:15:07Christmas is about charity, not embezzlement.

0:15:07 > 0:15:10Ask me anything about food storage.

0:15:10 > 0:15:12And you're expecting a "well done", are you?

0:15:12 > 0:15:14For learning the basics of your job?

0:15:14 > 0:15:16It ain't my fault Ian never gave me training.

0:15:16 > 0:15:18He only hired me when he was desperate and then he sacked

0:15:18 > 0:15:20me when he wasn't.

0:15:20 > 0:15:22Yeah, well, that shouldn't have happened.

0:15:22 > 0:15:23And Ian did say he was sorry.

0:15:23 > 0:15:26Yeah. Well, maybe he should make it up to me.

0:15:26 > 0:15:28- I need a pay rise.- A pay rise?

0:15:28 > 0:15:30I've got to go on a training course cos of you.

0:15:30 > 0:15:33I just need a bit of extra help for Mum's respite care.

0:15:33 > 0:15:35- No, I'm sorry. It's not possible. - Look...

0:15:35 > 0:15:36End of conversation!

0:15:39 > 0:15:41Christmas is about charity, is it?

0:15:57 > 0:16:01Oh, don't you look handsome in your uniform?

0:16:01 > 0:16:03You want to think about having a career in the police force,

0:16:03 > 0:16:07like your daddy did. Them buttons are as good as new. Come on.

0:16:07 > 0:16:09Thanks, Dot. How much do I owe you?

0:16:09 > 0:16:12Oh, I wouldn't dream of it, not for a few loose buttons.

0:16:12 > 0:16:15- Where's the title registration? - What?

0:16:15 > 0:16:16The document that was in this pocket.

0:16:16 > 0:16:19Well, I don't... I didn't see nothing in there.

0:16:19 > 0:16:22Well, hang on, this ain't my jacket. KNOCK ON DOOR

0:16:22 > 0:16:24Oh, who's that, this time of night?

0:16:24 > 0:16:28Lee! He must have picked it up by mistake!

0:16:28 > 0:16:30- Lee? Do you know how many decades she worked in there...- Hi, Dot.

0:16:30 > 0:16:33- Sorry if this is a bad time. - ..can't even tell the difference between a tailored suit...

0:16:33 > 0:16:37Amy needs to know what the park was like 100 years ago, for school.

0:16:37 > 0:16:39I wouldn't have the faintest idea. It was before my time.

0:16:39 > 0:16:42Do you know what, it's going to be stressful enough selling this

0:16:42 > 0:16:46house, without losing the title registration for it.

0:16:46 > 0:16:47Sorry, the house as in number 27?

0:16:47 > 0:16:51No, you can't be selling that cos that's mine, that's not yours.

0:16:51 > 0:16:54Come on, Amy, let's see if we can find a biscuit in the tin.

0:16:54 > 0:16:56Sit down beside Ricky.

0:16:56 > 0:16:59- Ron was going to have a word. - Oh, was she now?

0:16:59 > 0:17:02- What, is this about Ongar, is it? - Yeah, we've had an offer accepted.

0:17:02 > 0:17:06- I thought that was, like, way off. - No, it's happening. Like we agreed.

0:17:06 > 0:17:08I did not agree to sell my house!

0:17:08 > 0:17:12- Look, Roxy...- Amy! We're going, come on! Let's go.

0:17:12 > 0:17:15Oh, by the way, don't worry about that document.

0:17:15 > 0:17:17You won't be needing it.

0:17:17 > 0:17:19This Patient Education thing tomorrow better help

0:17:19 > 0:17:24me just to get dad to shut up and do the tests.

0:17:24 > 0:17:25Oi!

0:17:25 > 0:17:27What, you thinking about Shaki?

0:17:27 > 0:17:29What? Oh, he's just being funny with me.

0:17:29 > 0:17:32Hasn't text me all day.

0:17:32 > 0:17:35Well, his mates were giving him jokes after school.

0:17:36 > 0:17:37What were they saying?

0:17:37 > 0:17:40It was just boys chatting rubbish but...

0:17:40 > 0:17:42they did use the word "frigid".

0:17:42 > 0:17:45Who are they to judge? As if they have done everything, anyway.

0:17:45 > 0:17:49Most people in my year have done everything, never mind yours!

0:17:49 > 0:17:54Look, don't tell him I showed you but...I can replay it.

0:17:54 > 0:17:58'Oi, look, don't tell Bex cos it's just going to upset her.

0:17:58 > 0:18:01'It's just a joke. Allow it still, yeah?'

0:18:05 > 0:18:07Obviously, I was going to tell you.

0:18:07 > 0:18:10But it is sweet he didn't want you to know.

0:18:10 > 0:18:12Yeah, but...what am I going to do?

0:18:12 > 0:18:14Well, tell him to stop wearing the bracelet for a start.

0:18:14 > 0:18:17- Well, people'll think... - What, and that's such a bad thing?

0:18:22 > 0:18:25Yeah, Mick, Dot just got a bit confused, bless her.

0:18:25 > 0:18:28Yeah, so I've got his jacket, he's got mine.

0:18:28 > 0:18:30Yeah. Is he in the pub?

0:18:30 > 0:18:32Well, look, if you see him, tell him that I've left the title

0:18:32 > 0:18:36register for the house in the inside pocket and I need it ASAP.

0:18:37 > 0:18:39Yeah, cheers, mate.

0:18:39 > 0:18:42Strange thing to be carrying around with you,

0:18:42 > 0:18:43a title registration document.

0:18:43 > 0:18:46- Hm?- You can just get another one if it's lost, can't you?

0:18:46 > 0:18:49Yeah, it's just a hassle, ain't it?

0:18:49 > 0:18:52When did you say you dropped your jacket off at Dot's?

0:18:52 > 0:18:54- Saturday, wasn't it? - Yeah, something like that.

0:18:54 > 0:18:57Are you going to pour me a glass of wine or what?

0:18:57 > 0:19:00Well, that's funny, considering we only got the offer today.

0:19:00 > 0:19:02When did you arrange this valuation?

0:19:02 > 0:19:05The estate agent was waiting for us when we got back home.

0:19:05 > 0:19:07What, have you got her on a retainer or something?

0:19:07 > 0:19:09Retainer! That's a good one!

0:19:10 > 0:19:12I arranged it last week.

0:19:13 > 0:19:16You lied to my face this morning?

0:19:16 > 0:19:18How long have you been planning this? What, a week? More?

0:19:18 > 0:19:21It's hardly a big conspiracy, Ron.

0:19:21 > 0:19:22You wait till Roxy finds out.

0:19:22 > 0:19:26She knows. She caught me looking for the document at Dot's.

0:19:26 > 0:19:29I thought she was in a mood when she dropped Amy off earlier!

0:19:29 > 0:19:31She gave me a funny look.

0:19:31 > 0:19:33- You need to go and sort it out with her.- Me?!- Yes!

0:19:33 > 0:19:36- Oh, come on, you're the diplomatic one!- No!

0:19:36 > 0:19:40I'm not having her think that I sold her out behind her back.

0:19:40 > 0:19:42You did this. You, the shark.

0:19:42 > 0:19:45Seriously, if you want me to move to Ongar,

0:19:45 > 0:19:47you need to go and sort it out with my sister. Now.

0:19:47 > 0:19:50I know I sounded like Geraldine,

0:19:50 > 0:19:52but I was just so annoyed this morning.

0:19:52 > 0:19:54I mean, everyone knows that cooked food goes above raw in

0:19:54 > 0:19:57- a fridge, right?- Yeah, yeah, but if you can't give her a rise,

0:19:57 > 0:19:59at least you could explain why.

0:19:59 > 0:20:01You know, like, the more I'm thinking about it,

0:20:01 > 0:20:03you know, breakfast in here, it could be a good thing.

0:20:03 > 0:20:05It'd be a nice thing, I think.

0:20:05 > 0:20:08What, and you're happy with Babe being able to forge your signature?

0:20:08 > 0:20:11Well, that's Babe for you, ain't it? I suppose.

0:20:11 > 0:20:13You've brainwashed Mick, then.

0:20:13 > 0:20:14You thought about my offer?

0:20:14 > 0:20:16No! I haven't had a chance.

0:20:16 > 0:20:18I'm dealing with all the trouble you've been causing.

0:20:18 > 0:20:20- BABE CHUCKLES - That's nothing.

0:20:20 > 0:20:22Got a tasty photo of a rat by Kathy's bins earlier.

0:20:22 > 0:20:24Babe, enough.

0:20:24 > 0:20:28I'm just getting started. When I'm done, there won't be a cafe.

0:20:32 > 0:20:35Tina. Look, I'm sorry, the way I spoke to you just now.

0:20:36 > 0:20:38It's just I don't think you understand

0:20:38 > 0:20:39the margins we're working with.

0:20:39 > 0:20:42All I know is I helped your family out when you was in need.

0:20:42 > 0:20:45Yeah, and there's a reason I'm running the cafe, and not you.

0:20:45 > 0:20:49Er, food storage hiccups aside, I could run that cafe in my sleep.

0:20:49 > 0:20:51Yeah, I know.

0:20:51 > 0:20:53And the only reason I took the job was

0:20:53 > 0:20:55because we couldn't afford to pay you more.

0:20:55 > 0:20:57I'm earning less than you.

0:20:57 > 0:20:59Yeah, I know, but...

0:20:59 > 0:21:00Look, I would love to give you a raise

0:21:00 > 0:21:04and, barring today's hiccup, yeah, you do deserve it...

0:21:05 > 0:21:09..but we just don't have the money. I'm sorry.

0:21:14 > 0:21:17KNOCK AT DOOR

0:21:17 > 0:21:19- Ugh. - CLEARS THROAT

0:21:25 > 0:21:27I want us not to fight about this.

0:21:27 > 0:21:29What, and you do that by lying to my face, do you?

0:21:29 > 0:21:33By trying to shift the one thing in this world that I actually own?

0:21:36 > 0:21:38You don't care about the house.

0:21:38 > 0:21:40It's all I've got!

0:21:40 > 0:21:42OK? And if it all goes to pot,

0:21:42 > 0:21:45then I've got something to leave Amy when I've gone, haven't I?

0:21:46 > 0:21:49- OK, I get that. - Wow, he's worked it out(!)

0:21:49 > 0:21:51No wonder they made you a detective inspector(!)

0:21:54 > 0:21:57You know, talking to you is a lot like talking to Amy.

0:21:57 > 0:22:00Except, you know, she can be reasonable on occasion.

0:22:00 > 0:22:02Why don't you try selling all her dolls, yeah?

0:22:02 > 0:22:04See how she reacts to that.

0:22:04 > 0:22:06Like this, probably.

0:22:06 > 0:22:08Look, I know this isn't just about

0:22:08 > 0:22:10you leaving her something when you're gone.

0:22:11 > 0:22:14All right? This is about status.

0:22:14 > 0:22:17Rox, you and me - we're different.

0:22:17 > 0:22:21Me and Ronnie, we love plans, you know, timetables, mid-week stuff.

0:22:21 > 0:22:23You...

0:22:23 > 0:22:24What?

0:22:24 > 0:22:26What, am I just a party girl?

0:22:26 > 0:22:28No, it's... It's more weekend fun.

0:22:30 > 0:22:31Is that what you tell our daughter?

0:22:31 > 0:22:35It's nothing to be ashamed of. It's just who you are.

0:22:35 > 0:22:38And, you know, when you want to be, you can be a good parent.

0:22:38 > 0:22:41I mean, we've had mishaps, ain't we?

0:22:41 > 0:22:43That rabbit, that weren't a fan...

0:22:43 > 0:22:47but, ultimately, Rox, you're a good person.

0:22:47 > 0:22:48Shut up.

0:22:51 > 0:22:52Look, you are. All right?

0:22:52 > 0:22:56I know it. Amy knows it.

0:22:56 > 0:22:59Now you're getting upset cos if we move, Amy's going to be with us

0:22:59 > 0:23:02during the week and you at weekends, and you seem to think that's

0:23:02 > 0:23:05going to make you less important somehow, but it's just not.

0:23:05 > 0:23:08I know which of the two of us she's going to have more fun with.

0:23:11 > 0:23:14And Ronnie - you know she ain't going to go ahead with this

0:23:14 > 0:23:16without your consent.

0:23:16 > 0:23:17So you've got final word.

0:23:19 > 0:23:22But I promise you, if I sell this place, you get half.

0:23:24 > 0:23:26All right? Think what you could do with all that with Amy.

0:23:35 > 0:23:38- She have a change of heart? - They're too skint, like everyone.

0:23:38 > 0:23:41Come work for me, and I'll give you a 30% stake in profits.

0:23:41 > 0:23:45For 30%, you're going to want more than service with a smile.

0:23:45 > 0:23:48Maybe you could see to it the cafe falls some way below the

0:23:48 > 0:23:51standards of cleanliness expected by the council on their next visit.

0:23:51 > 0:23:54You want to sabotage Kathy? What have you got against her?

0:23:54 > 0:23:58Nothing. It's just healthy competition.

0:23:58 > 0:23:59Think about it.

0:24:09 > 0:24:10KNOCK AT DOOR

0:24:15 > 0:24:18- Hey.- You all right, Whit? - All right?

0:24:18 > 0:24:20Jack. Thought...

0:24:20 > 0:24:23Thought you was meant to give, like, 24 hours notice or something?

0:24:23 > 0:24:25It's looking nice in here.

0:24:25 > 0:24:26Thank you. I'm glad you like it.

0:24:26 > 0:24:28I was going to text you, actually...

0:24:28 > 0:24:30Listen, I've got your jacket. You've got mine.

0:24:30 > 0:24:32Bit of a senior moment from Dot.

0:24:32 > 0:24:34Oh, one sec. I hadn't noticed, so...

0:24:35 > 0:24:38Here, what you stuck these on with?

0:24:38 > 0:24:41JACK TUTS Watch the paint!

0:24:41 > 0:24:42Jack, it'll be fine.

0:24:42 > 0:24:46I was going to text you, because I was hoping to paint that wall.

0:24:46 > 0:24:48I found this really nice "lilac dreams".

0:24:48 > 0:24:50No, no, no "lilac dreams". That's fine.

0:24:50 > 0:24:51Yeah, it is yours.

0:24:51 > 0:24:53I was in a rush, so I just picked it up and ran.

0:24:53 > 0:24:55You want to sort yourself out a new suit.

0:24:55 > 0:24:57Nothing like a dodgy whistle.

0:24:59 > 0:25:02Oh, this makes my life a lot easier!

0:25:04 > 0:25:06There was some money in here...

0:25:06 > 0:25:12Oh, that's yours! It fell out when I got home.

0:25:12 > 0:25:14Oh! It's lucky I asked, innit?

0:25:16 > 0:25:17Whit.

0:25:17 > 0:25:20If you see Dot, can you apologise for me?

0:25:20 > 0:25:21I was a bit mean earlier.

0:25:21 > 0:25:23Me too, actually.

0:25:23 > 0:25:26Nothing a bunch of flowers won't sort out. Dot's a trooper.

0:25:26 > 0:25:28- See you later. - Bye, Jack.

0:25:28 > 0:25:29- Ta-ra. - Later.

0:25:37 > 0:25:39Oh, good heavens. Abi!

0:25:42 > 0:25:44Oh, so you've met Freddie Mercury?

0:25:44 > 0:25:46I can feel me glands swelling up already.

0:25:46 > 0:25:47You'll have to get rid of him.

0:25:47 > 0:25:50I can't have wild animals in the house.

0:25:50 > 0:25:54He's already been abandoned once. I can't just abandon him again.

0:25:54 > 0:25:55Please? It's just for one night.

0:25:57 > 0:25:59Do you have anything I could line his cage with?

0:25:59 > 0:26:02Don't touch those. No, they are my private affairs!

0:26:02 > 0:26:05So you DO have a problem with your eyesight.

0:26:05 > 0:26:07No. My eyesight's fine.

0:26:07 > 0:26:09Why didn't you say anything?

0:26:09 > 0:26:11Instead of stabbing yourself 500 times

0:26:11 > 0:26:13trying to fix Uncle Jack's suit?

0:26:13 > 0:26:16Abi, don't exaggerate. I pricked me finger once.

0:26:16 > 0:26:18They come through the door.

0:26:18 > 0:26:20I thought you said they were your private affairs.

0:26:20 > 0:26:23Yes, well, I was going to throw them away...

0:26:23 > 0:26:26Oh, I don't mind, line his cage with them.

0:26:26 > 0:26:29You can't use printed paper. The ink's poisonous.

0:26:29 > 0:26:33Well, then, just throw them away. I told you, I don't mind.

0:26:33 > 0:26:35My eyesight is fine.

0:26:45 > 0:26:49Look, sorry to bother you, but there's something you should know.

0:26:50 > 0:26:53Babe has applied for an early licence.

0:26:53 > 0:26:56Wants to get in on the breakfast trade and muscle you out.

0:26:57 > 0:26:58I see.

0:26:58 > 0:27:02And that Environmental Health complaint...

0:27:02 > 0:27:04What, she actually tried to shut us down?!

0:27:08 > 0:27:09Why are you telling me?

0:27:10 > 0:27:13She offered me a job, a share in the profits.

0:27:14 > 0:27:17Be like working for a hungry cobra, though.

0:27:17 > 0:27:19And you're after your pay rise.

0:27:20 > 0:27:23No. No, I'm telling you because I like my job.

0:27:25 > 0:27:29I'll find the extra money some other way. See you tomorrow.

0:28:01 > 0:28:03You have my blessing. Sell it.

0:28:04 > 0:28:06Something happened?

0:28:06 > 0:28:08No, she's just saying we can sell the house.

0:28:08 > 0:28:10Are you sure? I mean...

0:28:10 > 0:28:12As long as it gives Amy the childhood she deserves,

0:28:12 > 0:28:13then I'm sure.

0:28:14 > 0:28:15I don't know what to say...

0:28:15 > 0:28:18Look, we'll shift it in no time, I promise.

0:28:18 > 0:28:20- And you get 50%. - Yeah.

0:28:20 > 0:28:22Do you know? We should think about spring cleaning.

0:28:22 > 0:28:25The viewings are going to start more or less straight away, aren't they?

0:28:25 > 0:28:27We'll just get a professional to do it.

0:28:27 > 0:28:29- We should redecorate! - Ron, that's a bit overkill.

0:28:29 > 0:28:31I'll... I'll leave you to it, yeah?

0:28:31 > 0:28:34- I'll see you tomorrow. - All right. Rox, thank you.

0:28:39 > 0:28:44BRASS BAND PLAYS HARK! THE HERALD ANGELS SING