0:00:02 > 0:00:04You're so pathetic.
0:00:04 > 0:00:07Keller. Where the best anaesthetist is now a surgeon,
0:00:07 > 0:00:12the student nurse was a former holiday rep, and the highest-ranking
0:00:12 > 0:00:16surgeon only uses the word urgent when he's run out of biscuits.
0:00:16 > 0:00:18I love you.
0:00:23 > 0:00:26And you really think this is best for the hospital?
0:00:26 > 0:00:28Yes, I really do.
0:00:30 > 0:00:32'You're something special.'
0:00:32 > 0:00:34Don't waste that potential.
0:01:14 > 0:01:16SHE LAUGHS NERVOUSLY
0:01:16 > 0:01:18I'm Sam.
0:01:18 > 0:01:22I'm deputy assistant manager of Pulses coffee shop here at Holby.
0:01:23 > 0:01:25- WOMAN:- And how do you know Guy Self?
0:01:27 > 0:01:29He's a well famous brain surgeon.
0:01:29 > 0:01:32That's why you're here, isn't it?
0:01:32 > 0:01:34What's this all about?
0:01:34 > 0:01:37You seem to know him...personally.
0:01:37 > 0:01:38How did that come about?
0:01:39 > 0:01:42Well...coffee, I suppose.
0:01:42 > 0:01:44I make it. He drinks it. A lot of it.
0:01:44 > 0:01:47Especially during the graveyard shift.
0:01:47 > 0:01:51I help him sometimes with his sudoku. I think he even joys it.
0:01:51 > 0:01:57You know, a little break from being Mr Life-and-death Brain Doctor, Billy Big...
0:01:57 > 0:01:59Oop!
0:01:59 > 0:02:00Oh, you can bleep that out, right?
0:02:00 > 0:02:03Er...is this really necessary?
0:02:03 > 0:02:05You'll thank me in post-production.
0:02:05 > 0:02:08It's not about making me look good.
0:02:08 > 0:02:11- Funny, I was told that's exactly what this is about. - HE CHUCKLES
0:02:11 > 0:02:15No. You've been commissioned to provide a unique insight into the world of neurosurgery.
0:02:15 > 0:02:19Specifically YOUR neurosurgical unit.
0:02:19 > 0:02:22Our successes, advances, ambitions.
0:02:23 > 0:02:24That's the story. Not me.
0:02:24 > 0:02:27Every story needs a human face. An angle.
0:02:29 > 0:02:30And that's me, is it?
0:02:32 > 0:02:36HE LAUGHS OK, I'll...defer to your expertise.
0:02:36 > 0:02:37What do you need me to do?
0:02:37 > 0:02:39Just be yourself. Act like we're not here.
0:02:39 > 0:02:44Think of this as... "a day in the life of Guy Self".
0:02:44 > 0:02:48So, how would Guy Self start his day?
0:02:48 > 0:02:50Hmm.
0:02:55 > 0:02:56Finally.
0:02:57 > 0:03:00Where'd you go to source those beans, Colombia?
0:03:00 > 0:03:02No. Wrexham.
0:03:02 > 0:03:05- Oh, Mr Self! The usual?- Oh, that would be lovely. Thank you, Sam.
0:03:05 > 0:03:09- Yeah, excuse me, there's a queue. - Oh...whenever.- I'll have...
0:03:09 > 0:03:12A grande caffe mocha, double whipped cream, extra shot,
0:03:12 > 0:03:13half skinny, half full-fat milk.
0:03:13 > 0:03:15Here's a blueberry muffin for now,
0:03:15 > 0:03:17and a double chocolate brownie for later.
0:03:17 > 0:03:20It'll be £6.95 and it'll just take a couple of minutes,
0:03:20 > 0:03:23so if you wouldn't mind just waiting over there, Ms Effanga.
0:03:25 > 0:03:26Morning.
0:03:26 > 0:03:28I'll have what she's having, please.
0:03:28 > 0:03:31Do you know, this is going to take a while.
0:03:31 > 0:03:34Me shift's nearly over so, well, I'll bring it over.
0:03:34 > 0:03:36- You know, when the rush is done. - You're a life-saver.
0:03:36 > 0:03:37Oh, and Mr Self?
0:03:38 > 0:03:41I saved you the inferno. No cheating on the time limit.
0:03:41 > 0:03:43As if.
0:03:47 > 0:03:50Did you know your dad had his own reality TV show now?
0:03:50 > 0:03:52Didn't even know he liked sudoku.
0:03:57 > 0:03:59Counting the days until Dry January's over?
0:04:01 > 0:04:04Actually I was counting down the days until your return.
0:04:05 > 0:04:07How was the refresher course?
0:04:07 > 0:04:11It was really very generous of the NHS to spend valuable time
0:04:11 > 0:04:16and scarce resources on teaching me how to suck eggs.
0:04:16 > 0:04:20Specialism. Welcome to the NHS.
0:04:20 > 0:04:23Live kidney donation and transplant. Are they here?
0:04:23 > 0:04:25Er, the donor is.
0:04:25 > 0:04:28Lewis Bolter. Given up for adoption at age two.
0:04:28 > 0:04:3220 years later, tracks down his birth mother,
0:04:32 > 0:04:35only to learn that she's in end-stage renal failure.
0:04:35 > 0:04:40- As a result of hepatitis C infection. - Consequence of a misspent youth.
0:04:40 > 0:04:44- IV drug user?- Yes. And alcoholic until five years ago.
0:04:44 > 0:04:47When she goes on to the transplant list for the first time.
0:04:47 > 0:04:51Yes, nothing like renal failure to encourage lifestyle changes.
0:04:51 > 0:04:53Nurse Harrison, nice to see you again.
0:04:53 > 0:04:57- Hello, how are you doing, Lewis? - Nervous, but ready.- Good.
0:04:57 > 0:04:58This is Mr Griffin,
0:04:58 > 0:05:01he's your consultant overseeing the operations today.
0:05:01 > 0:05:04- Transplant expert, are you? - I've done a few.
0:05:04 > 0:05:07So you know the difference between a kidney and a liver.
0:05:07 > 0:05:11Well, he knows that one goes nicely with steak.
0:05:11 > 0:05:14Mr Bolter, I'd like to thank you for what you're doing.
0:05:14 > 0:05:16The NHS is desperately short of life-saving organs
0:05:16 > 0:05:19and this really is an amazing gift.
0:05:20 > 0:05:22Let's do the latest haemoglobin
0:05:22 > 0:05:25and when the recipient arrives we'll do final checks.
0:05:25 > 0:05:27Sure.
0:05:27 > 0:05:29Er, where is Alison?
0:05:29 > 0:05:33Er, Transport went to get her so she must be stuck in traffic.
0:05:33 > 0:05:36- But I'm sure she's fine.- It's OK. Not like I'm in a rush.
0:05:38 > 0:05:39Be right back.
0:05:40 > 0:05:43Can you check with Transport where she is?
0:05:43 > 0:05:45- She should have been here hours ago. - OK.
0:05:45 > 0:05:47I've just got to check something.
0:05:47 > 0:05:50The board has decided to capitalise on the recent successes
0:05:50 > 0:05:54of the neuro unit, with a sustained media and public-relations push,
0:05:54 > 0:05:56so you may notice that there's a documentary team here
0:05:56 > 0:05:58following Mr Self about.
0:05:58 > 0:06:01- Sounds like an episode of Meet The Selfies.- Very good.
0:06:01 > 0:06:04The documentary obviously will be focusing on the neuro unit, but
0:06:04 > 0:06:07if you are approached perhaps you will assist in their storytelling.
0:06:07 > 0:06:09What, like interviews?
0:06:09 > 0:06:12- If asked, yes.- What do we say? - Nice things.
0:06:12 > 0:06:14SHE SNORTS
0:06:15 > 0:06:17Right. Thank you.
0:06:21 > 0:06:23I was rather expecting more resistance.
0:06:23 > 0:06:26Well, I've got wall-to-wall surgery today.
0:06:26 > 0:06:28I haven't got the time or inclination to care about what
0:06:28 > 0:06:33new harebrained schemes our resident narcissist sociopath has hatched.
0:06:33 > 0:06:35When I said "nice things"...
0:06:35 > 0:06:37I am surprised by you, however.
0:06:37 > 0:06:40Allowing this kind of circus in your hospital.
0:06:40 > 0:06:42- The board feels... - How do you feel?
0:06:44 > 0:06:47I feel that my hands are tied on the subject.
0:06:47 > 0:06:50The procedure Mr Self will be performing, though, is one of note.
0:06:50 > 0:06:53It will bring esteem - and money - to this hospital
0:06:53 > 0:06:55and to his unit.
0:06:55 > 0:06:58You may wish to reflect on what may be done with this money.
0:06:58 > 0:07:02Ric Griffin is performing a live-donation kidney transplant on Keller today.
0:07:02 > 0:07:05I am doing a surgical ventricular restoration.
0:07:05 > 0:07:08What's Guy got that's worthy of a documentary team?
0:07:08 > 0:07:12It's not just the procedure he's doing, it's who he's doing it for.
0:07:12 > 0:07:15CLASSICAL VIOLIN PLAYS
0:07:19 > 0:07:22Right. The star of today's show.
0:07:22 > 0:07:24Hello, Guy.
0:07:24 > 0:07:26Michelle Lavers, meet Nathan Hartley,
0:07:26 > 0:07:27one of the country's top violinists.
0:07:27 > 0:07:31Not just the country, one of the world's best virtuosos.
0:07:31 > 0:07:35I know you. I mean, I saw you a few years back.
0:07:35 > 0:07:37You were...amazing.
0:07:37 > 0:07:40And then you just disappeared. What happened?
0:07:43 > 0:07:44Parkinson's?
0:07:44 > 0:07:47No, I can't cure that, not yet.
0:07:47 > 0:07:50No, this is a condition known as essential tremor.
0:07:50 > 0:07:53It's an uncontrollable shake to a part of the body.
0:07:53 > 0:07:56- In this case, the up-and-down movement of the hand.- What causes it?
0:07:56 > 0:07:58No-one seems to know.
0:07:58 > 0:08:00The important thing is, I can cure these symptoms.
0:08:00 > 0:08:05- How? - Ah. I know enough about showbiz to know you don't give away the ending.
0:08:05 > 0:08:06Mr Self?
0:08:06 > 0:08:07Your coffee.
0:08:07 > 0:08:10Saima, you're an angel.
0:08:10 > 0:08:14You know, if you want to find the heart of the NHS from the human angle,
0:08:14 > 0:08:16you could do worse than start with Saima Ahmed.
0:08:19 > 0:08:20Thank you.
0:08:22 > 0:08:24What's with the camera crew?
0:08:24 > 0:08:28Oh, it's a bit of PR to attract funding, donors, that kind of thing.
0:08:28 > 0:08:30What do you need funding for?
0:08:30 > 0:08:33Growth. Empires don't build themselves.
0:08:33 > 0:08:34Um, Mr Self?
0:08:34 > 0:08:38- Do you know what I was telling you about my friend, Sarah?- Mm-hm?
0:08:38 > 0:08:42She wasn't feeling very well. Nausea, tired all the time.
0:08:42 > 0:08:44Did she go and see her GP?
0:08:44 > 0:08:47No. Er, she's been a bit too busy for that.
0:08:47 > 0:08:49And I don't think she really likes talking about it,
0:08:49 > 0:08:52you know, to strangers.
0:08:52 > 0:08:55But the thing is, er, she's been getting more symptoms.
0:08:55 > 0:08:57Dizzy spells. Pains.
0:08:59 > 0:09:01I'm really worried about her.
0:09:01 > 0:09:04I just... I think she just needs some reassurance.
0:09:06 > 0:09:08They make a cute couple, don't they?
0:09:08 > 0:09:10What?
0:09:10 > 0:09:12Dr March and Mr Valentine.
0:09:12 > 0:09:16They've been flirting for months but they've finally hooked up.
0:09:17 > 0:09:19Oh...she didn't tell you?
0:09:21 > 0:09:25She's probably embarrassed. You know, office romance.
0:09:25 > 0:09:28- Those things don't often work out, do they? - MOBILE RINGS
0:09:28 > 0:09:29Excuse me, Sam.
0:09:29 > 0:09:32Hello. Yep, thanks for getting back to me.
0:09:32 > 0:09:37I just wanted to let you know that I'm putting on a show and everyone is invited.
0:09:37 > 0:09:38Yeah.
0:09:45 > 0:09:46- ADELE:- Essie!
0:09:48 > 0:09:50Ugh. What?!
0:09:50 > 0:09:51- There you are.- Yep.
0:09:51 > 0:09:53Sorry. I didn't mean to startle you.
0:09:56 > 0:09:59Well, you shouldn't have come in here screaming like a banshee, then.
0:09:59 > 0:10:01It's Ms Wood.
0:10:01 > 0:10:03Alison? You found her? Where was she?
0:10:03 > 0:10:06Here. Well, downstairs. She's been in the ED.
0:10:06 > 0:10:07Is she all right?
0:10:07 > 0:10:10Yeah. Well, no. I think you need to see her for yourself.
0:10:12 > 0:10:15- Where's my boy?- I don't know.
0:10:15 > 0:10:17Surely he should be here by now?
0:10:18 > 0:10:21Essie! Good to see you.
0:10:21 > 0:10:24And you, Alison. Erm, can you take that for me, please? At last.
0:10:24 > 0:10:28Oh, sorry. Know I'm late. Got caught up.
0:10:29 > 0:10:32- Yes, I heard that you'd been in the wars. - ALISON LAUGHS WEAKLY
0:10:32 > 0:10:35It's just a sprained ankle. I had a little fall.
0:10:35 > 0:10:37Whoops.
0:10:37 > 0:10:39Feel better now, though.
0:10:39 > 0:10:41There he is. There's my Lewis.
0:10:41 > 0:10:43Come and give your mother a hug.
0:10:43 > 0:10:45Are you OK?
0:10:45 > 0:10:49I'm fine. Just fine! Apart from a twisted ankle.
0:10:49 > 0:10:51- And end-stage renal failure! - SHE LAUGHS
0:10:52 > 0:10:53Alison.
0:10:53 > 0:10:56- Hm?- Have you been drinking?
0:10:57 > 0:11:01Maybe...one or...two.
0:11:01 > 0:11:03And I...
0:11:03 > 0:11:05missed a session of dialysis.
0:11:06 > 0:11:08I'm sorry.
0:11:08 > 0:11:11Let's get her into HDU and onto dialysis ASAP.
0:11:11 > 0:11:12And I'll page Mr Griffin.
0:11:12 > 0:11:14CLASSICAL VIOLIN PLAYS
0:11:17 > 0:11:20So it's true. You're bringing Nathan Hartley back from the dead.
0:11:20 > 0:11:22I'm going to restore the use of his hand.
0:11:22 > 0:11:26What he does with it after that is entirely up to him.
0:11:26 > 0:11:29Deep brain stimulation? Quite the show stopper.
0:11:29 > 0:11:31Which is why I've invited several donors, VIPs
0:11:31 > 0:11:34and select board members to attend.
0:11:34 > 0:11:38- Does Hanssen know? - What Hanssen does or doesn't know is of no concern to me.
0:11:38 > 0:11:41Where'd you dig him up? I heard he was a recluse. How'd you meet?
0:11:41 > 0:11:44Would you believe I'm a purveyor of the arts?
0:11:44 > 0:11:46I believe you're a purveyor of something.
0:11:46 > 0:11:48Well, what does it matter where I found him?
0:11:48 > 0:11:52This time tomorrow morning he'll be back playing the violin and my work will be done.
0:11:52 > 0:11:55No, this time tomorrow he'll be dead.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57What? What exactly are you saying?
0:11:57 > 0:12:00Surely you must have seen the bruising on his legs, the petechiae?
0:12:00 > 0:12:01And these platelet counts.
0:12:01 > 0:12:05You're on a CT ward and you can't diagnose thrombocytopenia when it's staring you in the face.
0:12:05 > 0:12:09Calm down. He's on quinine for leg cramps, it's a side effect.
0:12:09 > 0:12:12Haematology have had him on IV immunoglobulin for 24 hours now.
0:12:12 > 0:12:15Oh, so you knew about it and you're going ahead anyway?
0:12:15 > 0:12:17Haematology are on top of it and they've told me
0:12:17 > 0:12:20the platelet count falls within acceptable parameters.
0:12:20 > 0:12:22Why take the risk at all?
0:12:22 > 0:12:24Ahh, you don't want to ruin the big show,
0:12:24 > 0:12:26not now you've booked the audience.
0:12:26 > 0:12:28Have you considered low-molecular-weight heparin?
0:12:28 > 0:12:30Now who's showing their ignorance?
0:12:30 > 0:12:33I really don't want to risk a bleed in the middle of brain surgery.
0:12:33 > 0:12:37What about afterwards, when he's immobile and his blood clots and he becomes my ward's problem?
0:12:37 > 0:12:40OK, enough! I have been playing this by the book.
0:12:40 > 0:12:43His medication is not working, this is his last chance.
0:12:43 > 0:12:44What is this, Jac?
0:12:44 > 0:12:47Have you got a dog in this fight that I'm not aware of?
0:12:47 > 0:12:48No.
0:12:48 > 0:12:54OK. If you're going to choose sides, then choose wisely.
0:12:54 > 0:12:57You already have a vast range of unattractive personality traits, Guy.
0:12:57 > 0:12:59Adding paranoia to them really doesn't help.
0:12:59 > 0:13:03You don't want my advice, don't take it. Live with the consequences.
0:13:05 > 0:13:06It's your friend.
0:13:06 > 0:13:08What friend?
0:13:08 > 0:13:10SHE GROANS
0:13:12 > 0:13:14- Sam?- All right, mate, turn it off. Come on.
0:13:14 > 0:13:16Uhh...what happened?
0:13:16 > 0:13:20- We'd just finished some interviews and she just...collapsed. - Me chest...hurts.
0:13:20 > 0:13:22Try not to talk, my love.
0:13:22 > 0:13:23- Pulse is 85.- Heart?
0:13:23 > 0:13:25Possibly. We need to get her into a bed - now.
0:13:25 > 0:13:27Can I have a chair, please?
0:13:27 > 0:13:29You're going to be all right, OK?
0:13:29 > 0:13:31Sorry...I'm been a nuisance.
0:13:31 > 0:13:33Shh-shh-shh.
0:13:33 > 0:13:35SHE LAUGHS
0:13:35 > 0:13:37Fancy him?! Mr Self?
0:13:37 > 0:13:39No!
0:13:39 > 0:13:40Oh, the very thought!
0:13:41 > 0:13:45Not that he's not...you know... bit of a dish!
0:13:45 > 0:13:48Cos he is. Oh, that voice...
0:13:48 > 0:13:51But, no. No, we're just friends.
0:13:51 > 0:13:53Sudoku friends.
0:13:56 > 0:13:59He's still in love with his wife.
0:13:59 > 0:14:01She died.
0:14:01 > 0:14:02I... I suppose you know that.
0:14:04 > 0:14:07He's still in love with her, so much it eats him up.
0:14:09 > 0:14:12Something...really beautiful about that.
0:14:14 > 0:14:17Something...raw.
0:14:19 > 0:14:21It's like...
0:14:22 > 0:14:26Well, it's like one of those Greek tragedies or something.
0:14:28 > 0:14:30Love, eh?
0:14:34 > 0:14:36# De de-de de-de... #
0:14:40 > 0:14:42Ooh...
0:14:42 > 0:14:44Aren't we late enough already?
0:14:46 > 0:14:48Should we be doing this?
0:14:48 > 0:14:51Was it the whole me calling you Josephine thing?
0:14:51 > 0:14:54Because...that just slipped out.
0:14:54 > 0:14:55What?
0:14:55 > 0:14:57Look, sometimes when I'm...
0:14:57 > 0:14:59in the throes of passion,
0:14:59 > 0:15:03I'm minded of...Napoleon's great love for Josephine. But...
0:15:03 > 0:15:05That's a compliment if anything,
0:15:05 > 0:15:09and it's certainly not worth ending this journey before it's even begun.
0:15:09 > 0:15:12Who said anything about ending things?
0:15:12 > 0:15:14Um, you just said, "Should we be doing this?"
0:15:14 > 0:15:19Oh, I... What I meant was... being a...couple. In public.
0:15:21 > 0:15:22In there.
0:15:23 > 0:15:26Just, I...I'm not sure I see the alternative.
0:15:26 > 0:15:28We just don't tell anyone.
0:15:30 > 0:15:32- You mean lie.- Dissemble.
0:15:33 > 0:15:36Let's just not hold hands and see how we go, eh?
0:15:38 > 0:15:39It'll be our little secret.
0:15:41 > 0:15:45(It's just, I'm...I'm not very good with secrets.) Trust me.
0:15:45 > 0:15:47Please?
0:15:56 > 0:15:58Oh, and Arthur?
0:15:58 > 0:16:00- The Josephine thing?- Yep?
0:16:00 > 0:16:02- It's weird.- I'll stop.- Thank you.
0:16:02 > 0:16:04How much did she have to drink?
0:16:04 > 0:16:06Blood alcohol's only slightly raised,
0:16:06 > 0:16:08so she's not exactly bingeing.
0:16:08 > 0:16:11It's the fact that she drank at all, that's the worry.
0:16:11 > 0:16:12She's an alcoholic.
0:16:12 > 0:16:16Yeah, but the fact that she's stopped, having started, I mean, that's encouraging.
0:16:16 > 0:16:19Plus she is showing genuine signs of remorse, yes?
0:16:19 > 0:16:20I just don't understand.
0:16:20 > 0:16:21She has been clean for years,
0:16:21 > 0:16:24she's completely turned her life around,
0:16:24 > 0:16:27and now the son that she gave up has come back,
0:16:27 > 0:16:29she's got a second chance at life, at being a mother...
0:16:29 > 0:16:31Maybe that's what she's scared of.
0:16:31 > 0:16:34How long ago did Lewis make contact?
0:16:34 > 0:16:36Four months or so.
0:16:36 > 0:16:41Ahh, and then almost immediately he offers to donate his kidney.
0:16:41 > 0:16:44That is enough to stir up some sort of guilt.
0:16:44 > 0:16:48The question is whether it's going to affect her ability to maintain her post-operative care.
0:16:49 > 0:16:51Let's get a psych assessment.
0:16:51 > 0:16:54And in the meantime continue her dialysis so we're ready to go,
0:16:54 > 0:16:57- in case we get a green light, yeah? - Yeah.
0:17:00 > 0:17:02Well, will you look at this?
0:17:02 > 0:17:04You dirty little stop-outs.
0:17:04 > 0:17:07- Excuse me?- You two. Rocking up at this sort of time...
0:17:07 > 0:17:10Whoa, what do you mean... Whoa, what do you mean, "you two"?
0:17:10 > 0:17:13- Just that... - I don't know what implications you're attempting to make,
0:17:13 > 0:17:16Nurse Fletcher, but I can tell you that I resent them...
0:17:16 > 0:17:18and I reject it.
0:17:18 > 0:17:19- Utterly.- Arthur...
0:17:19 > 0:17:21No, no, there is no "us two".
0:17:21 > 0:17:24There is Morven - there she is - and then there's me.
0:17:24 > 0:17:27Two entirely separate entities, linked by nothing more than...
0:17:27 > 0:17:29He just meant that you're both late.
0:17:30 > 0:17:31Oh.
0:17:33 > 0:17:35Trains, you know. What you going to do?
0:17:35 > 0:17:36You haven't got to tell me.
0:17:36 > 0:17:40And, Diggers? Erm, lay off the caffeine for a bit.
0:17:40 > 0:17:41Right.
0:17:42 > 0:17:43What was that?
0:17:43 > 0:17:46I just... I told you. I'm...no good at lying.
0:17:46 > 0:17:49Look, just try and breathe, Arthur.
0:17:49 > 0:17:52Afternoon, Doctor Digby. Bed 5, then come and find me,
0:17:52 > 0:17:53we need to have a chat.
0:17:53 > 0:17:55OK, about, er, what, exactly?
0:17:55 > 0:17:57You and Dr Shreve.
0:18:00 > 0:18:03Sam. You're looking a lot better.
0:18:03 > 0:18:05- SHE CHUCKLES - I'm sure I'm not.
0:18:05 > 0:18:07But I am feeling it.
0:18:07 > 0:18:10- BP and heart rate have stabilised. - ECG?
0:18:10 > 0:18:12It's showing signs of ST depression.
0:18:12 > 0:18:13What does that mean?
0:18:13 > 0:18:17It means that we need to do an angiogram so we can see things a little better.
0:18:17 > 0:18:19I'll get it booked.
0:18:22 > 0:18:24Sorry I didn't listen to you earlier.
0:18:24 > 0:18:27But there is no friend Sarah, is there?
0:18:27 > 0:18:30- No.- No. So why...
0:18:30 > 0:18:34Oh, I couldn't. I didn't want it to be a thing with us.
0:18:34 > 0:18:37You spend your whole life saving people.
0:18:37 > 0:18:40I didn't want you to feel like you had to save me as well.
0:18:40 > 0:18:42- Oh...- Hey.
0:18:43 > 0:18:47Was that him? The violinist you told me about.
0:18:47 > 0:18:50- Mmm, yes, it was. - You going to save him?
0:18:50 > 0:18:51I'm going to try.
0:18:53 > 0:18:57Listen, you know the documentary crew that were interviewing you?
0:18:57 > 0:18:59- About me?- Mm.
0:18:59 > 0:19:01What exactly did they want to know?
0:19:02 > 0:19:04Everything.
0:19:06 > 0:19:11I need to know you're not going to flake out on me. On this.
0:19:11 > 0:19:12Well? What's the verdict?
0:19:12 > 0:19:16Er, there's no physical reason why the procedure can't take place.
0:19:16 > 0:19:18But...?
0:19:18 > 0:19:20Another psych assessment's required.
0:19:20 > 0:19:23Great. More assessments.
0:19:23 > 0:19:26Have you any idea how many times we've been through this?
0:19:26 > 0:19:28I understand it's frustrating...
0:19:28 > 0:19:31I just want this done with. One way or another.
0:19:36 > 0:19:38He's cross with me.
0:19:39 > 0:19:45Well, after everything that you've both been through these last few months, can you blame him?
0:19:48 > 0:19:49What happened?
0:19:51 > 0:19:52I fell off the wagon, didn't I?
0:19:52 > 0:19:54Why?
0:19:54 > 0:19:57It's what I do. It's who I am.
0:19:57 > 0:19:58I don't believe that.
0:19:58 > 0:20:00Lewis does, though.
0:20:02 > 0:20:05And, like you said, who can blame him?
0:20:08 > 0:20:12You know, HE came looking for me. He tracked me down.
0:20:14 > 0:20:15Are you blaming him?
0:20:15 > 0:20:17No.
0:20:17 > 0:20:22I'm just saying that, if I hurt him, I didn't set out to.
0:20:28 > 0:20:29I'll leave you to it.
0:20:31 > 0:20:32- MICHELLE:- What motivates him?
0:20:32 > 0:20:36Well, I think... he wants to help people.
0:20:36 > 0:20:41There's a patient here today. A violinist. You should talk to him.
0:20:41 > 0:20:44If you knew where Mr Self found him,
0:20:44 > 0:20:47if you knew what he brought him back from...
0:20:49 > 0:20:52Ahh, look, sorry, I... I probably shouldn't have said that.
0:20:58 > 0:21:00BOW SCRAPES ON STRINGS
0:21:08 > 0:21:10I just wanted to...
0:21:10 > 0:21:12I know. But not yet.
0:21:13 > 0:21:15- When?- Soon.
0:21:16 > 0:21:18When I met you I'd given up hope.
0:21:18 > 0:21:20Yes, I know.
0:21:20 > 0:21:24When you told me you could help, I didn't want to believe you.
0:21:24 > 0:21:28Because it's easier, that. Easier not to hope.
0:21:30 > 0:21:34Because it's the hope that keeps you up at night.
0:21:34 > 0:21:35It's the hope that drives you mad.
0:21:35 > 0:21:38And in the end it's the hope that kills you.
0:21:40 > 0:21:42Well, I don't deal in hope.
0:21:44 > 0:21:47Sorry if I was a bit abrupt before.
0:21:48 > 0:21:51It's not your fault. You know that, right?
0:21:51 > 0:21:54It kind of is, though, isn't it?
0:21:54 > 0:21:55I mean...
0:21:55 > 0:21:58Just the emotional impact of me turning up.
0:21:58 > 0:21:59Has to have an effect, right?
0:22:00 > 0:22:02Yeah.
0:22:04 > 0:22:06You remind me of my mother.
0:22:06 > 0:22:08Other mother. Adoptive mother.
0:22:08 > 0:22:11You can see how this stuff gets confusing.
0:22:11 > 0:22:15Well, I suppose...it must be confusing for them too.
0:22:17 > 0:22:20They're not thrilled about it, sure. But they understand.
0:22:20 > 0:22:23Well, maybe they should be here.
0:22:23 > 0:22:26Surgery's a big deal, Lewis. It's not something you should do alone.
0:22:26 > 0:22:30Well, I'm not alone, am I? Got you looking out for me.
0:22:30 > 0:22:31What made you do it?
0:22:33 > 0:22:36Why did you... go looking for your birth mother?
0:22:39 > 0:22:41I guess I just wanted to find out...
0:22:41 > 0:22:43where I came from.
0:22:43 > 0:22:45What happened.
0:22:45 > 0:22:46Who I really am.
0:22:49 > 0:22:50And now I know.
0:23:05 > 0:23:07POWER WHINES DOWN
0:23:16 > 0:23:18HE KNOCKS
0:23:18 > 0:23:19Yes.
0:23:21 > 0:23:24I, er...yes. Er, sit, sit, sit.
0:23:33 > 0:23:35Right. Er, ready to start?
0:23:37 > 0:23:39Start with what?
0:23:39 > 0:23:41With what you have to tell me about Dr Shreve.
0:23:41 > 0:23:43It's none of your...business?
0:23:43 > 0:23:45SHE LAUGHS IN BEMUSEMENT
0:23:45 > 0:23:50Since when is the professional progress of a junior doctor under my care...none of my business?
0:23:50 > 0:23:52Professional progress?
0:23:52 > 0:23:54Dr Shreve's appraisal.
0:23:54 > 0:23:56Do you not read your e-mails?
0:23:58 > 0:24:00Yep, yeah, I do remember that. Yep.
0:24:00 > 0:24:02But you've done nothing about it?
0:24:03 > 0:24:05Not as such.
0:24:05 > 0:24:10Look. I know some aspects of the mentoring process may seem overly bureaucratic
0:24:10 > 0:24:14but all employees - especially juniors - require honest, objective
0:24:14 > 0:24:17and ethical feedback. Agreed?
0:24:17 > 0:24:18- Agreed.- Good.
0:24:18 > 0:24:21So you can observe and evaluate Dr Shreve for the rest of the shift
0:24:21 > 0:24:24and then report back to me. Understood?
0:24:24 > 0:24:25Understood.
0:24:25 > 0:24:27Oh, Dr Digby?
0:24:27 > 0:24:29Honest, objective and ethical.
0:24:29 > 0:24:33I can't stress enough how important these values are in this process.
0:24:33 > 0:24:36Now, I know that you and Morven are friends,
0:24:36 > 0:24:40so if there's any conflict of interest, now's the time to speak up.
0:24:40 > 0:24:41No? Good.
0:24:48 > 0:24:51Would you kindly let Mr Cutler know that we'll be
0:24:51 > 0:24:53requiring his services sooner rather than later.
0:24:53 > 0:24:55Psych are happy.
0:24:55 > 0:24:56You sound surprised.
0:24:56 > 0:24:57I suppose I am.
0:24:57 > 0:24:58Why?
0:25:01 > 0:25:04Nurse Harrison, you are the transplant co-ordinator,
0:25:04 > 0:25:07you've been across this from the beginning.
0:25:07 > 0:25:10If you have any doubts you should voice them.
0:25:10 > 0:25:12It was just something that Alison said...
0:25:12 > 0:25:16about not meaning to hurt him, not wanting to...
0:25:16 > 0:25:19Well, she did give him up for adoption as a child.
0:25:19 > 0:25:20Wasn't she referring to that?
0:25:20 > 0:25:22I don't know. Maybe.
0:25:22 > 0:25:25When are you taking him into theatre?
0:25:25 > 0:25:29Two hours' time. It's going to need a bit more than that to ask for a second opinion.
0:25:29 > 0:25:32No, I'm not after a second opinion, I just need to check something.
0:25:37 > 0:25:39Mrs Bolter?
0:25:39 > 0:25:42Hi, I'm Nurse Harrison from Holby City Hospital.
0:25:42 > 0:25:45Erm, I'm calling about your son, Lewis.
0:25:45 > 0:25:48The hospital as a whole experienced a sudden surge of power
0:25:48 > 0:25:50but the brunt of it was borne by Darwin Ward.
0:25:50 > 0:25:53Fortunately the backup generators did their job
0:25:53 > 0:25:56and there was no serious threat to public or staff.
0:25:56 > 0:25:57So we're all good to go?
0:25:57 > 0:26:00The wiring between Theatres 1 and 2 appears to have been damaged.
0:26:00 > 0:26:03Maintenance have advised that we shut down Theatre 2
0:26:03 > 0:26:06until they can guarantee us that there is no secondary problem.
0:26:06 > 0:26:10What a shame. I guess the board will have to get their viewing pleasure elsewhere.
0:26:10 > 0:26:13- But Theatre 1 is still good, right? - Correct.
0:26:13 > 0:26:16OK, so once Jac has finished her restoration we can shift the DBS.
0:26:16 > 0:26:17The equipment's easily transferrable.
0:26:17 > 0:26:20In a situation like this policy dictates that we postpone
0:26:20 > 0:26:23all elective surgery in case there's an emergency.
0:26:23 > 0:26:27OK, so we're going to leave a perfectly good theatre unused and empty in case there's an act of God?
0:26:27 > 0:26:31- It would be prudent. - Or stupid. Shall we see what the board has to say about this?
0:26:31 > 0:26:33Moot point. Theatre's booked up.
0:26:33 > 0:26:38- By whom?- Mo. Coronary artery bypass graft for one Saima Ahmed.
0:26:38 > 0:26:40Emergency admission.
0:26:40 > 0:26:44Do you ever get the feeling the universe is trying to tell you something?
0:26:44 > 0:26:45Find me a theatre.
0:26:45 > 0:26:48Unless Darwin's remaining theatre becomes available,
0:26:48 > 0:26:52I'm afraid you are going to have to cancel Mr Hartley's procedure.
0:26:57 > 0:26:58Trust him?
0:26:58 > 0:27:00Yeah, course.
0:27:00 > 0:27:01Simple as that?
0:27:01 > 0:27:03Simple as that.
0:27:03 > 0:27:04'I trust him.
0:27:04 > 0:27:06'With me life.'
0:27:06 > 0:27:08Aren't you supposed to be in theatre doing your thing?
0:27:08 > 0:27:11Yeah, I just wanted to see how you're getting on.
0:27:11 > 0:27:12I'll save you the trouble.
0:27:12 > 0:27:14Artherosclerosis.
0:27:14 > 0:27:17- So I hear. - Ms Effanga thinks it's serious.
0:27:17 > 0:27:20Well, yes...it is. And she will look after you very well.
0:27:23 > 0:27:25What's the matter?
0:27:26 > 0:27:29Platelet count. It's probably nothing, but...
0:27:29 > 0:27:32- Mo?- Yeah.- Have you got a minute?
0:27:32 > 0:27:33Sure.
0:27:35 > 0:27:39I hear you're taking Sam in for a bypass graft.
0:27:39 > 0:27:42Yes, the angiogram showed up signs of plaque build-up.
0:27:42 > 0:27:45Yes, I can see that. It's just that the platelet counts are very low.
0:27:45 > 0:27:48- Well, they're borderline.- So a platelet transfusion wouldn't hurt.
0:27:48 > 0:27:51- Of course not, it's just... - Just...to be safe.
0:27:51 > 0:27:53Sam, what do you think?
0:27:54 > 0:27:56I don't know.
0:27:56 > 0:27:59Er... What would it mean to have a transfusion?
0:27:59 > 0:28:01Well, nothing really. A couple of hours in here,
0:28:01 > 0:28:04then you'd be off to theatre, safe and sound.
0:28:04 > 0:28:07Oh, yeah, OK. Well, if it's safer.
0:28:07 > 0:28:09Yeah, it's safe but really not necessary.
0:28:09 > 0:28:12Whatever Mr Self thinks is best.
0:28:12 > 0:28:14That's good enough for me.
0:28:15 > 0:28:17Then I'll call Haematology.
0:28:17 > 0:28:19Good. Er, let me know how she gets on.
0:28:19 > 0:28:21If you need me I'll be in theatre.
0:28:24 > 0:28:26Ah! You all right?
0:28:26 > 0:28:27Yep.
0:28:27 > 0:28:29What did Ms Campbell want?
0:28:29 > 0:28:30To talk.
0:28:30 > 0:28:32- Yeah...about what? - About work.
0:28:32 > 0:28:36I figured she didn't want to discuss Napoleonic battlefield tactics, Arthur.
0:28:36 > 0:28:38Dr Digby.
0:28:38 > 0:28:41Erm...excuse me?
0:28:41 > 0:28:44I think while we're at work we should maintain a proper
0:28:44 > 0:28:46professional distance.
0:28:46 > 0:28:50Er, a few hours ago you wanted to sing your love for me from the mountaintops,
0:28:50 > 0:28:53and now you're insisting on me calling you Dr Digby?
0:28:53 > 0:28:54I do love...
0:28:57 > 0:29:01# Love to be beside the seaside... #
0:29:01 > 0:29:03Oh! Looking for me, Nurse Fletcher?
0:29:03 > 0:29:05Maybe I'll give this one to Dr Shreve.
0:29:05 > 0:29:07No, we'll both do it.
0:29:07 > 0:29:11OK. But prepare yourselves, it's, erm...it's pretty nasty.
0:29:11 > 0:29:14Ohhhhhh...
0:29:14 > 0:29:16that is disgusting.
0:29:16 > 0:29:17I did warn ya.
0:29:17 > 0:29:19Is that a screw?
0:29:20 > 0:29:22Is it a screw?!
0:29:22 > 0:29:25HE MUMBLES RESPONSE
0:29:25 > 0:29:28Good luck getting an oral history out of this one...
0:29:30 > 0:29:32I think it's a piercing.
0:29:32 > 0:29:34That's too big for a piercing, isn't it?
0:29:34 > 0:29:35Is that a piercing...
0:29:35 > 0:29:37- Er...- Forget it. Forget it, forget it.
0:29:37 > 0:29:39MAN SIGHS
0:29:41 > 0:29:43Right then, Dr Shreve.
0:29:43 > 0:29:46Observation, diagnosis, treatment plan, please.
0:29:47 > 0:29:49Morven...
0:29:49 > 0:29:51Can you take this one, please?
0:29:52 > 0:29:54- Right what's the problem? - Teeth.
0:29:54 > 0:29:57- I've got a thing... - You've got odontophobia?
0:29:57 > 0:30:00No, that's dentists. I don't mind my own teeth.
0:30:00 > 0:30:02It's other people's like that close up.
0:30:03 > 0:30:05- I can take your hernia.- Um...
0:30:08 > 0:30:10No, I can't let you do that.
0:30:10 > 0:30:12Observations, diagnosis, treatment plan, please.
0:30:13 > 0:30:15Go on!
0:30:21 > 0:30:24Ah, Mr Hanssen, I'm so glad you could make it.
0:30:24 > 0:30:26I just came to wish you luck.
0:30:26 > 0:30:29I don't need it, Henrik I make my own luck.
0:30:29 > 0:30:30Quite.
0:30:30 > 0:30:33Indeed later, I shall be fascinated to hear Ms Effanga's reasons
0:30:33 > 0:30:36for not taking up her prescribed theatre slot.
0:30:36 > 0:30:40In the meantime, though, I'm rather looking forward to the performance.
0:30:40 > 0:30:42Well, I should give you quite a show.
0:30:42 > 0:30:44Oh, no, I was referring to Mr Hartley.
0:30:44 > 0:30:47I've had the honour of attending several of his performances.
0:30:47 > 0:30:51What you do today, if successful, is a gift not just to him
0:30:51 > 0:30:53but to the world.
0:31:00 > 0:31:01To Sydney...
0:31:01 > 0:31:02Yeah, one way.
0:31:02 > 0:31:04A week today.
0:31:06 > 0:31:07Thank you.
0:31:09 > 0:31:11Are you going somewhere?
0:31:11 > 0:31:12A little holiday.
0:31:14 > 0:31:17Do you always book one way when you take a holiday?
0:31:18 > 0:31:21I'm out of practice. I haven't taken one for years.
0:31:22 > 0:31:25Hard to get insurance, I imagine, with renal failure.
0:31:27 > 0:31:29But after today that won't be a problem, will it?
0:31:29 > 0:31:32Does Lewis know about your "little holiday"?
0:31:32 > 0:31:36What Lewis knows or doesn't know is really none of your business.
0:31:37 > 0:31:39- Don't do it, Alison.- Do what?
0:31:39 > 0:31:41Leave him.
0:31:41 > 0:31:43Not again.
0:31:43 > 0:31:45Not after what he's doing for you.
0:31:50 > 0:31:52I left my bag in the ED.
0:31:53 > 0:31:55Could you send someone for it, please?
0:32:08 > 0:32:11The tremor affects his right hand,
0:32:11 > 0:32:13which is his bowing hand.
0:32:13 > 0:32:15But the burr hole needs to be on the left.
0:32:25 > 0:32:26Stylet, please.
0:32:34 > 0:32:36Right.
0:32:36 > 0:32:38Now that I've made the burr hole
0:32:38 > 0:32:43and inserted the stylet, it's time for Mr Hartley to join the party.
0:32:43 > 0:32:47Could you bring the patient around, please?
0:32:47 > 0:32:49OK, Nathan. It's show time.
0:32:54 > 0:32:56Lewis?
0:32:56 > 0:32:58Are you OK?
0:32:58 > 0:33:00A bit nervous, I guess.
0:33:00 > 0:33:03It's not every day you give up a piece of your body.
0:33:03 > 0:33:05- You don't have to do this. - Yes, I do.
0:33:05 > 0:33:08I mean, you don't have to do it now.
0:33:08 > 0:33:09You can take some more time.
0:33:09 > 0:33:11Think about it.
0:33:11 > 0:33:12Think about it?
0:33:12 > 0:33:15I've done nothing but think about it for months!
0:33:15 > 0:33:18I've talked to doctors, psychiatrists, social workers...
0:33:18 > 0:33:20To you.
0:33:20 > 0:33:22You haven't spoken to your family.
0:33:22 > 0:33:23What?
0:33:23 > 0:33:27I rang your adoptive mother, Lewis, to discuss your post-operative care.
0:33:27 > 0:33:31She's your next of kin but she had no idea what I was talking about.
0:33:31 > 0:33:34- They're worried sick about you... - You had no right!
0:33:34 > 0:33:38I didn't know. You told me that you'd spoken with your parents.
0:33:38 > 0:33:40What else haven't you told them?
0:33:40 > 0:33:43Do they know you've tracked down your birth mother?
0:33:43 > 0:33:46Why didn't you tell them? Why didn't you tell us that you'd left home?
0:33:46 > 0:33:49- It's not my home.- Well, that's clearly not what they think.
0:33:49 > 0:33:52Look, I'm sorry. I didn't know. But now...
0:33:52 > 0:33:55Do you see why maybe you should take some time, re-evaluate?
0:33:55 > 0:33:57No...I don't. I don't understand.
0:33:57 > 0:34:00Where's this coming from? Why would you say this now?
0:34:00 > 0:34:02After what happened this morning...
0:34:02 > 0:34:04With Alison? That was just a wobble...
0:34:04 > 0:34:06Well, what if it wasn't? What if that is who she is,
0:34:06 > 0:34:08who she will be when this is done?
0:34:08 > 0:34:10Do you really know her?
0:34:10 > 0:34:12Do you know why you're doing this?
0:34:14 > 0:34:16She's my mother.
0:34:16 > 0:34:18I'm giving her a second chance.
0:34:18 > 0:34:19She doesn't deserve it! OK?
0:34:19 > 0:34:22She's booked a one-way flight to Sydney.
0:34:22 > 0:34:26- She's taking off the moment you hand her that second chance.- Essie...
0:34:26 > 0:34:30You tell him. You tell your son what you're planning to do.
0:34:30 > 0:34:33Second chance? Some people don't even get a single chance!
0:34:33 > 0:34:36Nurse Harrison! That's enough!
0:34:36 > 0:34:38It's for me.
0:34:38 > 0:34:39- What?- The flight.
0:34:39 > 0:34:41It's a present...
0:34:41 > 0:34:42For me.
0:34:44 > 0:34:46SHE SIGHS
0:34:47 > 0:34:48Nathan...
0:34:50 > 0:34:52Nathan...
0:34:54 > 0:34:55Welcome back.
0:34:55 > 0:34:56Smile.
0:34:56 > 0:34:58You're about to perform in front of a live audience
0:34:58 > 0:35:01for the first time in years.
0:35:07 > 0:35:10I'm going to insert the stimulator.
0:35:12 > 0:35:14The idea behind this operation is that
0:35:14 > 0:35:17I can cure these symptoms instantly.
0:35:17 > 0:35:19Nathan will play.
0:35:19 > 0:35:23I will begin the stimulation and gradually tremor will fade.
0:35:23 > 0:35:27And we should have a violin concerto to remember in no time.
0:35:27 > 0:35:28Are you ready, Nathan?
0:35:32 > 0:35:34Shall we have the Mendelssohn?
0:35:40 > 0:35:42HE PLAYS VIOLIN TENTATIVELY
0:35:42 > 0:35:44It's OK, don't worry. Keep going. Trust me.
0:35:47 > 0:35:49HE PLAYS TENTATIVELY
0:35:57 > 0:35:59SHE RETCHES
0:36:01 > 0:36:03Heart rate 70, BP 90/50.
0:36:03 > 0:36:06- She's in heart failure. We need to get her to theatre. - We can't. Guy's already in there.
0:36:06 > 0:36:09OK. GTN infusion and morphine.
0:36:09 > 0:36:11- You're going to do an IABP? - Yes.- Where?
0:36:11 > 0:36:14We'll have to do the procedure in X-ray.
0:36:14 > 0:36:15HE PLAYS VIOLIN
0:36:16 > 0:36:18That's great. You're doing beautifully, Nathan.
0:36:18 > 0:36:20Let's increase the current.
0:36:40 > 0:36:42There. Do you hear?
0:36:44 > 0:36:46Yes, I hear.
0:36:46 > 0:36:48HE PLAYS MORE CONFIDENTLY
0:37:21 > 0:37:22It's working, Guy.
0:37:22 > 0:37:24You were right.
0:37:25 > 0:37:26It's working.
0:37:26 > 0:37:28No, Nathan. It has worked.
0:37:28 > 0:37:31We found the correct settings moments ago...
0:37:31 > 0:37:32This has all been you.
0:37:34 > 0:37:36Ladies and gentlemen.
0:37:36 > 0:37:38Nathan Hartley.
0:37:43 > 0:37:45That seemed to go well.
0:37:45 > 0:37:47Yes, it went as well as I could have hoped.
0:37:47 > 0:37:49Although Nathan really did all the hard work.
0:37:49 > 0:37:51You and Mr Hartley seem close?
0:37:51 > 0:37:55Yes, we've known each other for 18 months or so.
0:37:55 > 0:37:58Nathan Hartley's been living as a virtual
0:37:58 > 0:38:00recluse for the past two years.
0:38:00 > 0:38:02How did you meet?
0:38:02 > 0:38:04Through mutual friends...
0:38:04 > 0:38:08There were rumours that Mr Hartley suffered from depression.
0:38:08 > 0:38:10Oh, I wouldn't know about that.
0:38:10 > 0:38:13And that he was part of a support group...
0:38:14 > 0:38:16Yes, as I said, I wouldn't know about that.
0:38:16 > 0:38:20PAGER BLEEPS Excuse me, I actually have to go. Sorry.
0:38:20 > 0:38:22Gently...
0:38:22 > 0:38:24Is that your advice to me as mentor, is it?
0:38:24 > 0:38:26To be gentle.
0:38:26 > 0:38:27OK, no need to be snarky.
0:38:27 > 0:38:30Like you've been with me ever since we walked in?
0:38:30 > 0:38:31I haven't been snarky.
0:38:31 > 0:38:33Well, what have you been, then?
0:38:33 > 0:38:35Honest? Objective? Ethical?
0:38:39 > 0:38:42Are you angry with me because I told you to be discreet about us?
0:38:42 > 0:38:43No!
0:38:43 > 0:38:46Well, then what is it?
0:38:48 > 0:38:50I'm supposed to be doing your appraisal.
0:38:52 > 0:38:55OK, so Serena called me into her office and she gave me
0:38:55 > 0:38:58this big speech about honesty and ethics
0:38:58 > 0:39:01and all I was thinking was I should be telling her that
0:39:01 > 0:39:03I'm in a relationship with you but I couldn't, so...
0:39:03 > 0:39:05Because I asked you not to.
0:39:06 > 0:39:08You are so sweet.
0:39:10 > 0:39:13- No wonder I love you.- Shh...
0:39:13 > 0:39:15He can't talk, can he?
0:39:15 > 0:39:19Look, I think you should go to Serena and tell her the truth.
0:39:19 > 0:39:20You're sure?
0:39:20 > 0:39:23- Yeah.- No more secrets?
0:39:23 > 0:39:24No more secrets.
0:39:45 > 0:39:46Are they going to make a complaint?
0:39:46 > 0:39:49No, it's enough that I've taken you off the case.
0:39:49 > 0:39:52You saw what I did, what I said.
0:39:52 > 0:39:54I made it personal, it's unforgivable.
0:39:54 > 0:39:56It's unavoidable.
0:39:56 > 0:40:01Look, transplant coordinator is one of the most emotionally draining jobs
0:40:01 > 0:40:05in the NHS. You can't do it unless you get personal.
0:40:05 > 0:40:07Sooner or later you're going to cross the line.
0:40:07 > 0:40:10You made a mistake - learn from it.
0:40:14 > 0:40:16ED sent this up.
0:40:16 > 0:40:19It's Alison's. They're getting her ready for theatre.
0:40:19 > 0:40:20Is there a problem?
0:40:20 > 0:40:23Well, I'm not sure.
0:40:23 > 0:40:25They had put it in their safe.
0:40:25 > 0:40:28They couldn't find any ID and they were going to call the police...
0:40:28 > 0:40:30Police.
0:40:49 > 0:40:50What happened?
0:40:50 > 0:40:51You did.
0:40:51 > 0:40:56Oh, come on, that's not fair. I couldn't have known she was going to go into heart failure...
0:40:56 > 0:40:57She was supposed to be in theatre!
0:40:57 > 0:41:02Even if she wasn't, that's where she should have been taken the moment her heart stopped,
0:41:02 > 0:41:05instead of me having to insert a balloon catheter in X-ray!
0:41:08 > 0:41:09Thank you.
0:41:09 > 0:41:11What?
0:41:11 > 0:41:13Thank you. For saving her.
0:41:20 > 0:41:22Who is she?
0:41:23 > 0:41:25She's...
0:41:25 > 0:41:27A friend.
0:41:30 > 0:41:32So you and Mr Valentine, are you...?
0:41:34 > 0:41:35Yes.
0:41:37 > 0:41:38How did you...?
0:41:38 > 0:41:40Any reason you didn't want to tell me?
0:41:40 > 0:41:42- Just didn't think of it.- Oh.
0:41:44 > 0:41:46Dad? Are you OK?
0:41:46 > 0:41:48Let me know when she wakes up.
0:41:55 > 0:41:57You found my bag.
0:41:57 > 0:42:00I won't be needing this in theatre, will I?
0:42:00 > 0:42:03Why is there £10,000 in cash in your bag, Alison?
0:42:03 > 0:42:06You went through my belongings?
0:42:06 > 0:42:08Don't you think you're in enough trouble?
0:42:08 > 0:42:10- What's the money for? - None of your business.
0:42:10 > 0:42:12It's got nothing to do with you.
0:42:12 > 0:42:14This is for Lewis, isn't it?
0:42:14 > 0:42:16Just like the ticket to Sydney.
0:42:16 > 0:42:17He's not giving you his kidney.
0:42:19 > 0:42:21You're buying it from him.
0:42:23 > 0:42:25KNOCK AT DOOR
0:42:25 > 0:42:27Yes!
0:42:30 > 0:42:34- Ms Campbell, could I... - Er, just pull up a chair.
0:42:42 > 0:42:45- I've got something of a conf... - No. Sshhh. Sshhh. Just a minute.
0:42:49 > 0:42:52Urgh! Do you know what I loathe, Arthur?
0:42:53 > 0:43:00What I hate and detest most in the professional environment?
0:43:00 > 0:43:02Human Resources?
0:43:04 > 0:43:05Gossip.
0:43:05 > 0:43:08Gossip and tittle-tattle.
0:43:08 > 0:43:09And do you know why?
0:43:09 > 0:43:15Because although innocuous, it is so pervasive that just the tiniest
0:43:15 > 0:43:19bit of it can threaten the social fabric of our entire hospital.
0:43:19 > 0:43:22And do you know what causes the most gossip?
0:43:22 > 0:43:26The well from which this poison overflows?
0:43:26 > 0:43:28Dominic?
0:43:28 > 0:43:31Office romances! Hmm.
0:43:31 > 0:43:34I can't begin to tell you how much fire-fighting
0:43:34 > 0:43:37I have to do on a daily basis just to stop the petty squabbles
0:43:37 > 0:43:40and politics of envy that come from work-mates who can't seem
0:43:40 > 0:43:42to stop going at it like rabbits!
0:43:43 > 0:43:46Whether it's Sacha and Essie loving it up on Keller
0:43:46 > 0:43:50or Jac Naylor and whatever poor sap she's feeding off this month,
0:43:50 > 0:43:54the backlash all ends up on my desk!
0:43:55 > 0:43:59Apparently Zosia and Oliver Valentine
0:43:59 > 0:44:01are having a...pop at it.
0:44:01 > 0:44:06Which will make Guy Self unbearable to be around.
0:44:06 > 0:44:11And, now, I find myself having to remind otherwise fully grown
0:44:11 > 0:44:15adults that copulation in store cupboards is
0:44:15 > 0:44:18a breach of the Hospital's Code of Conduct.
0:44:18 > 0:44:20It is SO dull!
0:44:22 > 0:44:25If I had my way, anyone found having an office romance
0:44:25 > 0:44:27would be dismissed post-haste.
0:44:29 > 0:44:32Anyway, what can I do for you?
0:44:32 > 0:44:34Scalpel, please.
0:44:36 > 0:44:39I thought we agreed you'd take the rest of the day off, Nurse Harrison.
0:44:39 > 0:44:42- Have you made an incision? - I'm about to.
0:44:43 > 0:44:46Can you delay that and step out of theatre, please.
0:44:46 > 0:44:47Is there a problem with Ms Wood?
0:44:48 > 0:44:50There's a situation.
0:44:53 > 0:44:55VIOLIN PLAYS IN BACKGROUND
0:45:09 > 0:45:10Guy...
0:45:10 > 0:45:12I don't know how to thank you.
0:45:12 > 0:45:13You don't need to thank me.
0:45:13 > 0:45:16Just hearing you play is thanks enough.
0:45:16 > 0:45:17How are you feeling?
0:45:17 > 0:45:20Like Iron Man.
0:45:20 > 0:45:22Like a new man.
0:45:23 > 0:45:25If there's anything I can do for you.
0:45:25 > 0:45:27Ever?
0:45:27 > 0:45:28Just ask.
0:45:28 > 0:45:30Well, I might hold you to that one day.
0:45:30 > 0:45:34Nathan, have you talked to anyone here about group?
0:45:35 > 0:45:38Of course not. You know the rules.
0:45:38 > 0:45:39Why?
0:45:39 > 0:45:42Oh, it's just something that someone said.
0:45:42 > 0:45:44I might have got the wrong end of the stick.
0:45:44 > 0:45:46Guy...
0:45:46 > 0:45:48You've saved me twice.
0:45:48 > 0:45:50If you hadn't been there at group...
0:45:52 > 0:45:54You gave me hope.
0:45:54 > 0:45:57Thought you said it was hope that kills?
0:45:57 > 0:45:59Are you absolutely sure that the money is
0:45:59 > 0:46:01payment for Mr Bolter's kidney?
0:46:01 > 0:46:04- Alison as good as admitted it. - As good as?
0:46:04 > 0:46:05She won't stop crying.
0:46:07 > 0:46:09- And this was all at her instigation? - Presumably.
0:46:09 > 0:46:12Imagine, he tracks down his mother after all these years
0:46:12 > 0:46:13and she does that...
0:46:13 > 0:46:15If he has an objection I haven't heard it.
0:46:15 > 0:46:18Nor have the countless other people involved in this process with
0:46:18 > 0:46:21the express purpose of ensuring that something like this doesn't happen.
0:46:21 > 0:46:24Well, it has happened and the question is what do we do about it?
0:46:24 > 0:46:27There is no question. It's illegal
0:46:27 > 0:46:31Can't we just let them, you know, go ahead?
0:46:31 > 0:46:35Well, we could, but then we would be engaging in unethical practice.
0:46:35 > 0:46:39Yeah, but no-one has to know, do they?
0:46:40 > 0:46:42Look, I know it's wrong
0:46:42 > 0:46:46but at least this way he gets to save his mother's life.
0:46:46 > 0:46:49At the cost of abandoning everything that we're supposed to stand for.
0:46:52 > 0:46:54Hey! How did it go?
0:46:54 > 0:46:56OK, when it comes to Ms Campbell, we are not now,
0:46:56 > 0:46:59nor ever have been, nor ever will be, a couple. OK?
0:46:59 > 0:47:01Dr Shreve?
0:47:01 > 0:47:05OK, BP 100/70. Pulse 120
0:47:05 > 0:47:07- and he's burning up... - What did you do?
0:47:07 > 0:47:09What do you mean, "What did I do"? Nothing.
0:47:09 > 0:47:11Well, what didn't you do, then?
0:47:11 > 0:47:14What? I gave him fluids and IV paracetamol.
0:47:14 > 0:47:16Clearly something's been missed because look at him.
0:47:16 > 0:47:19Why don't the two of you try working together to sort it out
0:47:19 > 0:47:21instead of squabbling like children.
0:47:27 > 0:47:30You stopped the operation for this?
0:47:30 > 0:47:32It's illegal, it's unethical.
0:47:32 > 0:47:33To you, maybe.
0:47:33 > 0:47:36To me, it's a gift from my mother.
0:47:36 > 0:47:37And your kidney?
0:47:37 > 0:47:39My gift to her.
0:47:40 > 0:47:43Life, it's got to be worth ten grand easy.
0:47:43 > 0:47:45This was your idea.
0:47:47 > 0:47:49This whole thing was your idea.
0:47:49 > 0:47:51When I found her, saw what she'd become...
0:47:51 > 0:47:53The life she had after giving me up.
0:47:53 > 0:47:57She turned her life around - job, house, she got the lot.
0:47:57 > 0:48:00But she never came looking for me.
0:48:00 > 0:48:01Why not?
0:48:01 > 0:48:04- It was 20 years later... - She had everything.
0:48:06 > 0:48:09But there was one thing I could offer her that no-one else could.
0:48:09 > 0:48:11So I did.
0:48:11 > 0:48:12But for a price.
0:48:12 > 0:48:14For a price.
0:48:15 > 0:48:18And she said, "Yes."
0:48:18 > 0:48:19Yeah...
0:48:23 > 0:48:26Didn't even stop to ask why I asked for money.
0:48:30 > 0:48:33Never even thought if it was unethical.
0:48:37 > 0:48:40That's how I knew we were mother and son.
0:48:44 > 0:48:46Where did Mr Hartley and Guy meet?
0:48:46 > 0:48:48I shouldn't say...
0:48:48 > 0:48:50That was told to me in confidence.
0:48:50 > 0:48:53This is Mr Self's documentary, everything is in confidence.
0:48:55 > 0:48:57Look, I don't know much about mental health, or whatever.
0:48:59 > 0:49:02But if I'd lost what that violinist had lost...
0:49:04 > 0:49:06If I had a gift like that and lost it...
0:49:08 > 0:49:10I think I'd be pretty depressed too.
0:49:12 > 0:49:15Yeah, I'd probably make a cry for help.
0:49:18 > 0:49:21There was this support group
0:49:21 > 0:49:22and this...
0:49:22 > 0:49:24TAPE FAST FORWARDS
0:49:30 > 0:49:32DOOR CLOSES
0:49:33 > 0:49:35This is not the documentary you're here to make.
0:49:35 > 0:49:37I disagree.
0:49:37 > 0:49:39I think it's exactly the documentary I'm here to make.
0:49:39 > 0:49:41It should be about my unit, about neurosurgery.
0:49:41 > 0:49:44No, Guy. It's supposed to be about you.
0:49:44 > 0:49:46And it is spectacular.
0:49:47 > 0:49:49Who is Guy Self?
0:49:49 > 0:49:52Brash, arrogant surgeon?
0:49:52 > 0:49:55Skilful, ruthless political animal?
0:49:55 > 0:49:57Empire builder?
0:49:57 > 0:50:00Or is he the lonely, night-time confidant to the masses.
0:50:00 > 0:50:03The idol of a working class tart with a heart.
0:50:03 > 0:50:06The man who finds lost souls and saves them.
0:50:07 > 0:50:09You don't know, do you?
0:50:13 > 0:50:15You're trying to figure it out.
0:50:16 > 0:50:19What lessons did you learn at this support group?
0:50:19 > 0:50:21Or are you still learning them?
0:50:21 > 0:50:23You really don't know what you're talking about.
0:50:23 > 0:50:24Exactly.
0:50:24 > 0:50:26What's the group for, Guy? Loss?
0:50:26 > 0:50:28Bereavement?
0:50:28 > 0:50:30Or something else?
0:50:31 > 0:50:32Depression?
0:50:32 > 0:50:35That's what Nathan Hartley was doing there, right?
0:50:35 > 0:50:39The question is why were you there?
0:50:39 > 0:50:41Trying to work out who you really are?
0:50:42 > 0:50:44I know exactly who I am.
0:50:46 > 0:50:48Now get out.
0:50:48 > 0:50:51His burning and sweat was not controlled by IV paracetamol
0:50:51 > 0:50:54- indicating... - That it's a recurring malady.
0:50:54 > 0:50:56It's something that's getting reinjured over and over.
0:50:56 > 0:50:59This is a guy who stuck a rusty screw as a piercing
0:50:59 > 0:51:00through his tongue.
0:51:00 > 0:51:02I mean, could he be doing it deliberately to himself?
0:51:02 > 0:51:06We need to think like someone who gets piercings. What else do they get?
0:51:07 > 0:51:09- BOTH:- Tattoos.
0:51:11 > 0:51:14I'm just going to give you another examination. OK?
0:51:18 > 0:51:20MAN GROANS
0:51:22 > 0:51:24It's bad.
0:51:24 > 0:51:25Cupid's arrow.
0:51:33 > 0:51:34Mr Self.
0:51:36 > 0:51:38Ms Ahmed.
0:51:38 > 0:51:39Good to see that you're OK.
0:51:39 > 0:51:41What's happened?
0:51:42 > 0:51:44I happened.
0:51:44 > 0:51:47Sorry, I don't understand.
0:51:50 > 0:51:52It's quite simple really.
0:51:53 > 0:51:56I manipulated you into foregoing theatre.
0:51:57 > 0:52:00A direct result of which was that you nearly died
0:52:00 > 0:52:02when your artery was blocked by plaque.
0:52:04 > 0:52:08So you nearly died because I wanted to show off my Neuro Unit
0:52:08 > 0:52:11to some rich and powerful people.
0:52:11 > 0:52:13Why would you do that?
0:52:15 > 0:52:16Because I could.
0:52:16 > 0:52:18Because that is who I am.
0:52:18 > 0:52:21- No, it's not. - Don't contradict me!
0:52:21 > 0:52:22Don't yell at me.
0:52:22 > 0:52:24I think that's better, a bit of fight.
0:52:24 > 0:52:26What are you doing?
0:52:26 > 0:52:27I'm telling you what happened.
0:52:27 > 0:52:29No. What are you doing?
0:52:29 > 0:52:31Are you trying to make me hate you?
0:52:31 > 0:52:34- No, I'm trying to make you see reality.- What reality?
0:52:34 > 0:52:37That I am not who you think I am.
0:52:37 > 0:52:41I'm not your friend. I'm not your confidant.
0:52:42 > 0:52:43I am not someone you should trust.
0:52:43 > 0:52:46Certainly not "with my life".
0:52:46 > 0:52:49Oh...
0:52:49 > 0:52:50You saw the film.
0:52:50 > 0:52:53Yes, I saw it all.
0:52:55 > 0:52:57If I said something wrong
0:52:57 > 0:53:01or I said something I shouldn't have, I'm really sorry.
0:53:01 > 0:53:04I just wanted them to understand you the way that I do.
0:53:04 > 0:53:07No, you don't really understand me at all, Sam.
0:53:07 > 0:53:09Look we both trusted each other. We both made that mistake.
0:53:09 > 0:53:11It would be better for us both
0:53:11 > 0:53:13if we stay away from each other from now on.
0:53:13 > 0:53:16Better for me, and healthier for you.
0:53:16 > 0:53:17I thought...
0:53:18 > 0:53:20I hoped we were friends.
0:53:21 > 0:53:23Don't hope.
0:53:23 > 0:53:24It's hope that kills.
0:53:26 > 0:53:28Goodbye, Sam.
0:53:31 > 0:53:34A touching performance.
0:53:34 > 0:53:35What if she makes a complaint?
0:53:35 > 0:53:38- She won't.- How do you know?
0:53:38 > 0:53:39She's better than that.
0:53:39 > 0:53:41Better than us.
0:53:41 > 0:53:42That's why you had to crush her,
0:53:42 > 0:53:45to make sure she didn't stick around to be disappointed by you.
0:53:45 > 0:53:47Almost an act of altruism,
0:53:47 > 0:53:50as enacted by a sociopath, of course.
0:53:50 > 0:53:53Will the real Guy Self please stand up?
0:53:53 > 0:53:55He just did.
0:54:00 > 0:54:02MOBILE RINGS
0:54:22 > 0:54:23Hi, Sacha.
0:54:25 > 0:54:28No, no, just another normal day.
0:54:31 > 0:54:33What were you thinking?
0:54:33 > 0:54:34HE SIGHS
0:54:34 > 0:54:37If you love someone you just say it.
0:54:37 > 0:54:40Don't scribe it into your flesh
0:54:40 > 0:54:43or, you know, stick something through your tongue to prove it.
0:54:43 > 0:54:45Just say, "I love you."
0:54:46 > 0:54:48"I love you."
0:54:52 > 0:54:54You see that girl there?
0:54:56 > 0:54:57I love her.
0:54:59 > 0:55:01Morven...
0:55:01 > 0:55:02I love you.
0:55:15 > 0:55:16Morven Shreve!
0:55:16 > 0:55:18I've got something to tell you.
0:55:18 > 0:55:20Um...
0:55:20 > 0:55:22Well, all of you, actually.
0:55:22 > 0:55:26And I really don't care who hears, or who knows.
0:55:29 > 0:55:31Well, spit it out then, mate.
0:55:34 > 0:55:35I love you.
0:55:37 > 0:55:40You want an appraisal? Here it is.
0:55:41 > 0:55:43I love Morven Shreve.
0:55:46 > 0:55:48We're not separate entities.
0:55:48 > 0:55:50We're together.
0:55:50 > 0:55:54And we're held by bonds that are stronger than any alloy.
0:55:55 > 0:56:01Her tears, they rob me of reason and inflame my blood
0:56:01 > 0:56:04and her smile intoxicates me.
0:56:04 > 0:56:07Morven Shreve illuminates me.
0:56:07 > 0:56:10She illuminates my whole world with every passing second.
0:56:10 > 0:56:12APPLAUSE
0:56:16 > 0:56:18Brave boy.
0:56:19 > 0:56:22Nice speech, mate, but we already knew.
0:56:23 > 0:56:25Er, you knew? How?
0:56:25 > 0:56:26Dominic.
0:56:26 > 0:56:28He posted about you two online.
0:56:29 > 0:56:33Well, I thought it was a very lovely speech.
0:56:33 > 0:56:36Yeah, I bet you did, Josephine.
0:56:37 > 0:56:40I am really, really sorry about the whole Josephine thing.
0:56:40 > 0:56:41It's OK.
0:56:42 > 0:56:44And...
0:56:46 > 0:56:48I love you too.
0:56:50 > 0:56:52See? It's easy.
0:57:01 > 0:57:03It's Darwin, isn't it?
0:57:04 > 0:57:07When you said to think about where Guy will spend his funds,
0:57:07 > 0:57:09he wants Darwin.
0:57:09 > 0:57:12I suspect it's not just Darwin Ward, Ms Naylor.
0:57:12 > 0:57:14What else could he want?
0:57:14 > 0:57:16Everything.
0:57:18 > 0:57:20I worry about him sometimes.
0:57:21 > 0:57:22I think...
0:57:24 > 0:57:27No, I know he's lonely.
0:57:28 > 0:57:33I know...that he's got demons.
0:57:36 > 0:57:38He doesn't know who he wants to be.
0:57:39 > 0:57:41He doesn't see himself as I see him.
0:57:44 > 0:57:46But there's always hope.