The L Word

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0:00:02 > 0:00:03What does it mean for the trial?

0:00:03 > 0:00:05Naturally, we need to find the source of the trouble

0:00:05 > 0:00:07so we can ensure it doesn't happen again.

0:00:07 > 0:00:08So we carry on?

0:00:08 > 0:00:09You are so patronising!

0:00:09 > 0:00:12This is the real world, love! It's time to grow a pair!

0:00:12 > 0:00:15If I've been too tough on you, then I'll ease off.

0:00:15 > 0:00:19The day Elaine Warren died, there was a trauma course for nurses.

0:00:19 > 0:00:21And one nurse does stand out - Amira Zafar.

0:00:21 > 0:00:23You'll need to talk to the social worker

0:00:23 > 0:00:25about your best options going forward.

0:00:25 > 0:00:28That's code for sticking me in a home.

0:00:28 > 0:00:31Roxanna's dementia project? It has to be her. Choose hers.

0:00:31 > 0:00:33The woman has an unhealthy obsession me.

0:00:33 > 0:00:35Last night, I woke up at 4:00 in the morning

0:00:35 > 0:00:37to find her watching me sleeping.

0:00:37 > 0:00:40I've been doing some thinking about this TMS of yours.

0:00:40 > 0:00:43If I could authorise the purchase of that machine myself, I would.

0:01:24 > 0:01:26POUNDING HEARTBEAT

0:01:26 > 0:01:28DISTANT SIREN WAILS

0:01:28 > 0:01:30BIRDSONG

0:01:39 > 0:01:41SHE SIGHS

0:01:42 > 0:01:45CLASSICAL PIANO MUSIC

0:01:45 > 0:01:47In everyone's life, there is someone...

0:01:50 > 0:01:52..that one defining someone...

0:01:55 > 0:01:57..who takes your life...

0:02:00 > 0:02:01..and changes it.

0:02:09 > 0:02:11Someone who...

0:02:13 > 0:02:15..who is...

0:02:15 > 0:02:17was...

0:02:18 > 0:02:20SHE SIGHS

0:02:21 > 0:02:23SHE SIGHS

0:02:27 > 0:02:30What is a tasting menu, anyway? Surely every menu gets tasted?

0:02:30 > 0:02:32That's half the point of eating.

0:02:32 > 0:02:33All right, fine.

0:02:33 > 0:02:37We'll go to whatever low-rent chicken shack that you prefer.

0:02:37 > 0:02:39But I at least want to go to the theatre.

0:02:39 > 0:02:41That all depends. Do I have to wear a suit, or...?

0:02:41 > 0:02:44Should it be this much effort to treat the man you love?

0:02:47 > 0:02:48I didn't use that word.

0:02:48 > 0:02:50- ELEVATOR BLEEPS - Excuse me!

0:02:52 > 0:02:55- Gran!- She's having chest pains. We're going to Darwin.

0:02:55 > 0:02:57Well, I'll come with you.

0:03:03 > 0:03:06I just looked in on Mr Valentine.

0:03:06 > 0:03:09He seems very positive about the TMS.

0:03:09 > 0:03:12He's certainly going in with the right attitude, that's for sure.

0:03:12 > 0:03:14You meant that as a bad thing.

0:03:14 > 0:03:19Well, I wouldn't want hopes to get too inflated, yours or his.

0:03:19 > 0:03:21Have you thought about any other patients

0:03:21 > 0:03:22you might like to include in the trial?

0:03:22 > 0:03:24I mean, beyond Oliver.

0:03:24 > 0:03:26If that's your less-than-subtle way of asking

0:03:26 > 0:03:29if I'm still watching him sleep, then the answer is no.

0:03:29 > 0:03:33You didn't mention the university have dedicated a lab to David.

0:03:34 > 0:03:36I've been invited to the ceremony.

0:03:36 > 0:03:38- Are you going to speak? - That's the idea.

0:03:38 > 0:03:40Sorry to interrupt.

0:03:40 > 0:03:43Have Fiona's postmortem results come back yet? I think we need to...

0:03:43 > 0:03:45Not yet. I'll find you later.

0:03:47 > 0:03:49I trust if expectations get too high,

0:03:49 > 0:03:51you will inject a dose of reality, won't you?

0:03:51 > 0:03:53Cruel to be kind, and all that.

0:03:53 > 0:03:55The last thing he needs is another setback.

0:03:55 > 0:03:56He won't get one, you have my word.

0:04:03 > 0:04:04The X-ray looks fine.

0:04:04 > 0:04:07ECG shows no sign of a heart attack, and the echo's clear.

0:04:07 > 0:04:09- Which leaves us where? - PE, most likely.

0:04:09 > 0:04:12Sounds like something kids do in plimsolls.

0:04:12 > 0:04:13It stands for pulmonary embolism.

0:04:13 > 0:04:15It means you have a blockage in a main artery.

0:04:15 > 0:04:18Specifically the vessel that carries blood from the heart to the lungs.

0:04:18 > 0:04:21We'll need to do a scan to determine how big the blockage is.

0:04:21 > 0:04:23If it's small, we can treat it with anticoagulants.

0:04:23 > 0:04:25Well, my luck's never been that good.

0:04:27 > 0:04:28What if it's big?

0:04:28 > 0:04:30Then we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

0:04:30 > 0:04:34Best case scenario, you're going to have a surgery.

0:04:34 > 0:04:37Worst case scenario, you're not going to make it that far.

0:04:37 > 0:04:41Well...little rays of sunshine, you two.

0:04:43 > 0:04:46Ms Petrenko is taking the lead on this, but I'll be overseeing.

0:04:46 > 0:04:47You're in safe hands.

0:04:51 > 0:04:54- SHE CHUCKLES - Look at his face!

0:04:54 > 0:04:57Someone stick the kettle on and stop being so serious!

0:04:57 > 0:04:58Good call.

0:04:58 > 0:04:59Come on, you.

0:05:10 > 0:05:13LOFTY SIGHS

0:05:13 > 0:05:15If I lose her...

0:05:17 > 0:05:20She's only just getting her head around having a stroke.

0:05:21 > 0:05:23I need to call Occupational Therapy,

0:05:23 > 0:05:26let them know they need to change the care package.

0:05:26 > 0:05:29OK. Well, you don't need to do that right this minute.

0:05:29 > 0:05:32I need to let them know so they can change the access visit.

0:05:35 > 0:05:38If it is PE, she won't be discharged any time soon.

0:05:44 > 0:05:47Can you keep an eye on her while I pop downstairs?

0:05:47 > 0:05:48Of course I will.

0:05:48 > 0:05:50I'll give Sacha a call and explain.

0:05:50 > 0:05:53I'm sure he can manage without me for one day.

0:05:53 > 0:05:54Thanks.

0:06:04 > 0:06:06- I was getting one for myself, anyway, so I thought...- Oh!

0:06:06 > 0:06:09A kind gesture, but one Mr Duval has rather beaten you to, I'm afraid.

0:06:09 > 0:06:11At this rate, someone'll have to

0:06:11 > 0:06:13scrape me off the ceiling by lunchtime.

0:06:14 > 0:06:16Ooh! I knew I should have bought a few more.

0:06:16 > 0:06:18Next time, you're first in the queue.

0:06:18 > 0:06:20I don't want to tell tales,

0:06:20 > 0:06:22but I saw some of the nurses taking more than one.

0:06:22 > 0:06:24He's learning, isn't he?

0:06:24 > 0:06:26Nothing makes people love you like free cake.

0:06:56 > 0:06:58OK. Ready to start?

0:07:01 > 0:07:04Activating the pulse sequence.

0:07:04 > 0:07:05HE EXHALES

0:07:07 > 0:07:09SOFT WHIRRING

0:07:10 > 0:07:12CREAKING

0:07:12 > 0:07:13HE GASPS

0:07:13 > 0:07:15I can feel that!

0:07:15 > 0:07:16CREAKING

0:07:19 > 0:07:21CREAKING

0:07:23 > 0:07:24Feels like it might be working.

0:07:26 > 0:07:29Is that even possible, or am I grasping at straws here?

0:07:30 > 0:07:33- Anything's possible. - Right. Well, don't hold back.

0:07:34 > 0:07:37I want to get all the benefit I can out of this.

0:07:37 > 0:07:39CREAKING

0:07:39 > 0:07:41Let me know if you feel anything else.

0:07:41 > 0:07:43CREAKING

0:07:45 > 0:07:47CREAKING

0:07:50 > 0:07:52CREAKING

0:07:54 > 0:07:56I tried looking Amira up on the internet.

0:07:56 > 0:07:59I've been into the nursing agency, but they won't give out her details.

0:07:59 > 0:08:01I thought anyone could be found online these days.

0:08:01 > 0:08:04Turns out not. Just my luck, eh?

0:08:04 > 0:08:06People use different names if they don't want to be found.

0:08:06 > 0:08:09Meanwhile, I have a hospital to run, a ward to manage,

0:08:09 > 0:08:11and doctors to mentor.

0:08:11 > 0:08:13The world keeps turning.

0:08:14 > 0:08:16Talk about needle in a haystack.

0:08:16 > 0:08:18Amira could be anywhere now she's left the profession.

0:08:18 > 0:08:20Well, let's not give up just yet.

0:08:20 > 0:08:22Cos if she is the one Ric asked to get the anticoagulants,

0:08:22 > 0:08:24- then it's a game-changer.- I know.

0:08:24 > 0:08:26I know what's at stake here, there's just nothing I can do about it.

0:08:27 > 0:08:30Well, let me see if I can flex my newly-found management muscles.

0:08:30 > 0:08:33The nursing agency might just be a bit more willing to talk to me.

0:08:33 > 0:08:35- OK.- Yeah?- Yeah.

0:08:35 > 0:08:37Ah, Ms Campbell, look what I found.

0:08:39 > 0:08:41Save it for one of the nurses, Mr Duval.

0:08:41 > 0:08:44Now, I'm going to be in and out of theatre most of the day.

0:08:44 > 0:08:47- I trust you can keep this show on the road?- Er...

0:08:47 > 0:08:50- Are you sure?- I'll be under the same roof this time.

0:08:50 > 0:08:53No, that was my fault, not yours.

0:08:53 > 0:08:56But let's neither of us repeat our mistakes.

0:08:56 > 0:08:58- I won't let you down. - I don't doubt it.

0:08:58 > 0:09:00Especially as you'll have Dr McKendrick to help.

0:09:00 > 0:09:03Well, I wouldn't say I need any help, as such.

0:09:03 > 0:09:04Listen to me.

0:09:04 > 0:09:10I mentor you, the registrar, who, in turn, mentors the F1.

0:09:10 > 0:09:12It's how this thing works.

0:09:12 > 0:09:15I'll be checking in on you, so play nice.

0:09:28 > 0:09:31Nurse Di Lucca said that you were in here. Is everything OK?

0:09:31 > 0:09:33More than. It's just come back!

0:09:33 > 0:09:34The research grant,

0:09:34 > 0:09:38the chest wall reconstruction project you told me about.

0:09:38 > 0:09:39You remember?

0:09:39 > 0:09:42I was up all night for a week perfecting my pitch.

0:09:42 > 0:09:45I remember it like it was yesterday.

0:09:45 > 0:09:47It turns out having magnetic fields

0:09:47 > 0:09:51moulding my grey matter really suits me.

0:09:51 > 0:09:53Ollie, I'm thrilled!

0:09:53 > 0:09:55"Choose hers."

0:09:55 > 0:09:57What does that mean, do you suppose?

0:10:00 > 0:10:03You gave up your chance of a grant...

0:10:03 > 0:10:06so that my project could get funding.

0:10:07 > 0:10:10Ah! Well, that was awfully nice of me.

0:10:11 > 0:10:15You came to believe that my research was the worthier.

0:10:15 > 0:10:17That's strange...

0:10:17 > 0:10:19That of all the memories that could have come flooding back,

0:10:19 > 0:10:21I get one relating to you.

0:10:22 > 0:10:24After these kind of injuries,

0:10:24 > 0:10:26when you've been spending a lot of time with someone,

0:10:26 > 0:10:30you start to recall specific memories associated with them.

0:10:30 > 0:10:33So, my brain's opened the file marked, "Roxanna MacMillan"?

0:10:34 > 0:10:37- Something like that. - And there's nothing else?

0:10:37 > 0:10:40Any other reason I'd have stepped away?

0:10:44 > 0:10:47The important thing to take from this...

0:10:47 > 0:10:49is that you're starting to remember.

0:10:52 > 0:10:53Don't tell me that you're the

0:10:53 > 0:10:56stay-at-home-on-a-Friday-and-jigsaw type.

0:10:56 > 0:10:59I couldn't bear for my Benjy to end up with one of those.

0:11:00 > 0:11:02Well, we've only had two dates, so...

0:11:02 > 0:11:05I've got mayonnaise in my fridge that's been there longer.

0:11:05 > 0:11:08Oh! Well, my grandson doesn't do casual.

0:11:10 > 0:11:13He's like his grandfather.

0:11:13 > 0:11:15I was his one and only.

0:11:16 > 0:11:19Well, I don't think I'm Lofty's one and only.

0:11:21 > 0:11:24Besides, I'm much more interested in playing the field at the moment.

0:11:26 > 0:11:28I'm not fooled.

0:11:28 > 0:11:31I've seen the way you look at Ben.

0:11:35 > 0:11:40So, what about this dropping-down-dead situation?

0:11:40 > 0:11:43Pulmonary embolisms are very serious.

0:11:44 > 0:11:47But if the worst were to happen, you are in the right place.

0:11:47 > 0:11:49If, or when?

0:11:52 > 0:11:53It could happen today,

0:11:53 > 0:11:55it could happen in a few weeks' time, who knows?

0:11:55 > 0:11:59But the main thing is that you're... taking it easy.

0:11:59 > 0:12:03I can't relax unless I know the full facts.

0:12:05 > 0:12:07If the worst happened...

0:12:08 > 0:12:10..what then?

0:12:13 > 0:12:17Your heart would probably stop, and you would need resuscitating.

0:12:18 > 0:12:20- And then what? - I really don't think this is...

0:12:20 > 0:12:23There'd be breathing machines, and so on?

0:12:25 > 0:12:26Probably...

0:12:26 > 0:12:28but it's really not for me to say.

0:12:31 > 0:12:33SHE SIGHS

0:12:33 > 0:12:35Your turn to roll.

0:12:37 > 0:12:40- So, how did it go this morning? - Baby steps in the right direction.

0:12:40 > 0:12:42One small step for a man with a fully-functioning brain,

0:12:42 > 0:12:44one giant leap for the likes of me.

0:12:44 > 0:12:46Of course, I still struggle to make a cup of tea,

0:12:46 > 0:12:49and only recall a few minor details relating to Roxanna,

0:12:49 > 0:12:50but it's a start.

0:12:50 > 0:12:52Oliver remembered our rather ignominious scrap

0:12:52 > 0:12:54over some research funding a few months ago.

0:12:54 > 0:12:55Blimey!

0:12:55 > 0:12:57Of all the memories in all the world...

0:12:57 > 0:12:59- That's what I said. - It's not that unusual.

0:12:59 > 0:13:01I'm the face he's seen the most of since the accident.

0:13:01 > 0:13:03Plus, she's promised me that I'll be cured soon.

0:13:03 > 0:13:06No wonder my brain thinks you're a significant figure.

0:13:06 > 0:13:09Listen, I was after a second opinion on another patient.

0:13:09 > 0:13:11I hope you don't mind my cutting in.

0:13:13 > 0:13:16Before you start, I didn't promise him anything.

0:13:16 > 0:13:17He barely remembers his own wife,

0:13:17 > 0:13:19yet can recall some jostle over funding.

0:13:19 > 0:13:22Like I told Ollie, it's normal.

0:13:22 > 0:13:24I'm close. The brain makes leaps like that.

0:13:24 > 0:13:26I was thinking you two might be functioning

0:13:26 > 0:13:28like your classic doctor-patient by now.

0:13:28 > 0:13:30- We are.- Do you need me to step in for a while,

0:13:30 > 0:13:32- give you some breathing space? - Not necessary.

0:13:32 > 0:13:34When I said your obsession made you brilliant,

0:13:34 > 0:13:36I was talking about professional obsession.

0:13:36 > 0:13:38- And I took it on board. - So, what is this?

0:13:38 > 0:13:40This is all Ollie.

0:13:40 > 0:13:43He's the one getting overexcited, he's the one expecting miracles.

0:13:43 > 0:13:45I'm doing absolutely nothing whatsoever to encourage it.

0:13:51 > 0:13:53Yeah, I've been on hold 15 minutes.

0:13:55 > 0:13:58If he fails as a surgeon, he'll make a good orderly.

0:13:58 > 0:14:00What, Dom? No, he's doing great.

0:14:00 > 0:14:02We could do with a bit more love round here, if you ask me.

0:14:02 > 0:14:05- You have somebody in particular in mind?- Behave.

0:14:05 > 0:14:08Anyway, you'd have to be daft to take on an old nag like me.

0:14:09 > 0:14:12- There we are. - Tea the colour of gnat's pee.

0:14:12 > 0:14:14I'd rather face death than drink that!

0:14:14 > 0:14:19- THEY CHUCKLE - Well, it's all a ruse to cover my tracks.

0:14:19 > 0:14:22Oh! You sly dog!

0:14:22 > 0:14:23I love it!

0:14:23 > 0:14:25But we will have to wait to see whether or not

0:14:25 > 0:14:26you're going to need surgery first.

0:14:26 > 0:14:28Spoilsport!

0:14:29 > 0:14:32You're trying to butter me up, aren't you?

0:14:32 > 0:14:33Very suspicious.

0:14:36 > 0:14:39Sheilagh, you had me worried earlier with all that talk about what if.

0:14:39 > 0:14:41I just need the truth.

0:14:43 > 0:14:45If anything happens, and I'm in here

0:14:45 > 0:14:48for a minute longer than I have to be, I...

0:14:48 > 0:14:49SHE SIGHS

0:14:51 > 0:14:55I think you need to prepare yourself for a...fairly long stay.

0:14:56 > 0:14:59Yes, I thought you might say that.

0:14:59 > 0:15:02Which is why I've come up with a backup plan.

0:15:02 > 0:15:03Oh?

0:15:05 > 0:15:08I'm going to sign one of those forms

0:15:08 > 0:15:13saying to let me go when the time comes.

0:15:13 > 0:15:15No heroic measures.

0:15:15 > 0:15:17A DNAR?

0:15:17 > 0:15:19No, Sheilagh, Sheilagh, we are not at that stage yet...

0:15:19 > 0:15:21And I don't intend to get there.

0:15:21 > 0:15:23SHE SIGHS

0:15:23 > 0:15:25I've always relied on my gut instinct...

0:15:27 > 0:15:29..and I'm not about to stop now.

0:15:32 > 0:15:34So I hear you got a visit from the Great and Powerful Oz earlier on.

0:15:34 > 0:15:37If you're referring to Professor Gaskell, then yes.

0:15:37 > 0:15:39Or is he the guy who works the levers behind the big face?

0:15:39 > 0:15:41- I can never quite remember. - He was checking in on Ollie.

0:15:41 > 0:15:45- It's pretty good of him if you ask me.- Amazing he can spare the time.

0:15:45 > 0:15:48So, did you get to speak to him, or not?

0:15:48 > 0:15:51I tried. I just want to get to the bottom of why our patient died,

0:15:51 > 0:15:54and then I can stop obsessing about it.

0:15:54 > 0:15:56But he didn't have time, so he'll catch me later.

0:15:56 > 0:15:58Ah, just the woman I was looking for.

0:15:58 > 0:16:00I have a patient, and I think there might be a neuro angle,

0:16:00 > 0:16:02so I wondered if you'd care to dive in.

0:16:02 > 0:16:05I'd love to, but I'm due in theatre with Ollie in 30 minutes.

0:16:05 > 0:16:06Twice in one day?

0:16:06 > 0:16:08Got to make hay while the sun shines.

0:16:08 > 0:16:09Absolutely.

0:16:11 > 0:16:13It's like Ollie's got his own personal neurosurgeon.

0:16:14 > 0:16:18- I'm telling you, it's him! - His chin's not...chiselled enough.

0:16:18 > 0:16:21His face is plastered all over town. I'd recognise him anywhere.

0:16:21 > 0:16:23Slimmer's Sausages. That's him, isn't it?

0:16:23 > 0:16:25Yeah, but what's the point in being that good looking

0:16:25 > 0:16:27if you can't even eat a proper sausage?

0:16:27 > 0:16:29Let's get Mr Heron here a gastroscopy and CT.

0:16:29 > 0:16:32- He'll need an IV, and he's nil by mouth.- OK.

0:16:32 > 0:16:35Oh, vomiting for the past three days.

0:16:35 > 0:16:37FLETCH AND DONNA: That'll be the sausages.

0:16:37 > 0:16:39THEY CHUCKLE

0:16:39 > 0:16:40What's this?

0:16:40 > 0:16:43- What, an e-mail address? - I went to the agency.

0:16:43 > 0:16:46What, and they crumbled in the face of your Director of Nursing power?

0:16:46 > 0:16:47Not even a little bit.

0:16:47 > 0:16:50But then I remembered Amira sent me a couple of e-mails

0:16:50 > 0:16:51from her personal address.

0:16:51 > 0:16:53You're like a real-life Sherlock Holmes, you are.

0:16:53 > 0:16:55Well, most people have a couple of e-mail addresses.

0:16:55 > 0:16:59- She might not even check it.- There's only one way to find out. Come on.

0:16:59 > 0:17:01Er...right.

0:17:01 > 0:17:02Erm...what shall we tell her?

0:17:02 > 0:17:05- Er...- The truth?- No.

0:17:05 > 0:17:06Um...she used to be a nurse.

0:17:06 > 0:17:09Tell her she's owed money. That'll get her down here.

0:17:11 > 0:17:14Activating magnetic pulse sequence.

0:17:14 > 0:17:17Let's make this session a bit longer than the last.

0:17:17 > 0:17:19- Ollie...- Come on, we've had some success earlier.

0:17:19 > 0:17:21Does no harm to push things a bit.

0:17:24 > 0:17:25Or do you not want me to get better?

0:17:27 > 0:17:29OK, 40 minutes, but that's it.

0:17:31 > 0:17:34At this rate, I'll be dancing the Macarena in no time.

0:17:34 > 0:17:36CREAKING

0:17:36 > 0:17:40Your little, sweet, old lady just took me for £50.

0:17:40 > 0:17:42We were playing ladders and snakes.

0:17:47 > 0:17:48SHE SIGHS

0:17:54 > 0:17:58You're making a very bad decision based on a knee jerk reaction.

0:17:58 > 0:18:00You've given me all the facts.

0:18:00 > 0:18:02One day I'll be fine, and the next,

0:18:02 > 0:18:04something will pop in my heart, and I'll drop down dead,

0:18:04 > 0:18:07and be on a life-support machine.

0:18:07 > 0:18:10I thought I was getting better.

0:18:10 > 0:18:14Recovering from the stroke, and now things are ten times worse!

0:18:17 > 0:18:18Sheilagh, I'm... I'm sorry,

0:18:18 > 0:18:22I know it must seem like that, but it's a lot more complicated.

0:18:22 > 0:18:26Meanwhile, my heart might give out. Well, why not let it?

0:18:27 > 0:18:31You don't think Lofty's going to let you go through with this, do you?

0:18:31 > 0:18:33Which is why you're not going to tell him.

0:18:33 > 0:18:35It's my business, not his.

0:18:35 > 0:18:38It's up to me to decide where I'm going to end my days.

0:18:38 > 0:18:41And not he or anyone else is going to stick their oar in.

0:18:43 > 0:18:47Well, I hope you don't expect me to hide this from him.

0:18:47 > 0:18:49Why not?

0:18:49 > 0:18:51It's not as if you're his boyfriend, or anything, is it?

0:18:55 > 0:18:59People always ask the same question. "Where were you discovered?"

0:18:59 > 0:19:02But the truth is, most models aren't discovered

0:19:02 > 0:19:04any more than Einstein or Freud were.

0:19:05 > 0:19:08So, you're comparing someone who poses for pictures

0:19:08 > 0:19:11to the greatest minds of their generation?

0:19:11 > 0:19:13I'm just saying it takes hard work

0:19:13 > 0:19:16to get some of the campaigns I've been doing the past year.

0:19:16 > 0:19:19Aren't you advertising sausages at the moment?

0:19:19 > 0:19:22And electric blankets. They're not just for old people, you know.

0:19:22 > 0:19:24Gastroscopy and CT are all normal.

0:19:24 > 0:19:26Well, it can't be food poisoning.

0:19:26 > 0:19:28I've been on a juice cleanse since last Wednesday.

0:19:28 > 0:19:30And you reckon that's healthy?

0:19:30 > 0:19:32We're probably looking at IBS.

0:19:32 > 0:19:34- Treatable? - Very, now we've caught it.

0:19:34 > 0:19:38Well, unless we haven't. It could be something else entirely.

0:19:38 > 0:19:41Inflammatory bowel disease.

0:19:41 > 0:19:43Good call, Dr McKendrick.

0:19:43 > 0:19:45We'll do a small bowel MRI just to be sure.

0:19:48 > 0:19:50SHE COUGHS

0:19:50 > 0:19:52It's not just that she's giving up on herself,

0:19:52 > 0:19:55she's giving up on Lofty, as well, and...he loves his nan.

0:19:55 > 0:19:58They're unlike any family I've ever met.

0:19:58 > 0:20:01- They actually like each other. - Very strange.- Mmm.

0:20:03 > 0:20:05I don't know, maybe I should just tell him.

0:20:05 > 0:20:09I'm not bound by confidentiality. She's not my patient.

0:20:09 > 0:20:11She trusted you. Blabbing would feel wrong.

0:20:11 > 0:20:13No, not to me.

0:20:13 > 0:20:16- Although this whole situation just feels wrong.- Agreed.

0:20:17 > 0:20:19OLLIE SIGHS

0:20:20 > 0:20:22I could talk to her.

0:20:22 > 0:20:24Maybe talking to someone that's basically screwed health-wise

0:20:24 > 0:20:26would make her see sense.

0:20:26 > 0:20:30- Well...that would be amazing. That's not why I came down here.- Ah.

0:20:32 > 0:20:34Look, I know I'm a guy with a damaged frontal lobe,

0:20:34 > 0:20:36but there is one thing I don't get about all this.

0:20:36 > 0:20:39- What?- Why do you care so much?

0:20:40 > 0:20:42DOM CHUCKLES

0:20:42 > 0:20:44Lofty's like a big puppy dog.

0:20:44 > 0:20:49Seeing him upset would be like seeing Snoopy cry.

0:20:53 > 0:20:55- You love him.- Don't be ridiculous!

0:20:55 > 0:20:58You do. Look at your face! You've gone all red and embarrassed.

0:20:58 > 0:21:00You're like a massive bundle of love!

0:21:00 > 0:21:02- Dom and Lofty up a tree... - Now you're just being juvenile.

0:21:02 > 0:21:05Have you been K-I-S-S-I-N-G?

0:21:05 > 0:21:06Why can't people get that we are just casual?

0:21:06 > 0:21:10OLLIE LAUGHS Maybe because you're bending over backwards

0:21:10 > 0:21:13to save his grandmother, and you're worried if HE'S going to be upset.

0:21:13 > 0:21:14You just wouldn't do that if...

0:21:19 > 0:21:20Ollie?

0:21:22 > 0:21:25Huh? You wouldn't do those things if you didn't love him.

0:21:25 > 0:21:27Sorry, my... My brain.

0:21:27 > 0:21:29It's piecing something together.

0:21:29 > 0:21:32It... It's not as quick as it once was.

0:21:32 > 0:21:33HE CHUCKLES I'll get there.

0:21:49 > 0:21:51Is Fletch about?

0:21:51 > 0:21:53Apparently I'm owed some money.

0:21:53 > 0:21:56I knew my last pay packet seemed light.

0:21:56 > 0:21:58Actually, it wasn't.

0:21:58 > 0:22:01- We all think that every month. - DONNA CHUCKLES

0:22:01 > 0:22:04Er...except I'm owed for when I covered that MAJAX

0:22:04 > 0:22:05at the last minute.

0:22:05 > 0:22:06Can I have a word?

0:22:08 > 0:22:11It's offensive, is what it is, snakes and ladders.

0:22:11 > 0:22:14- It's for five-year-olds. - What choice do I have?

0:22:14 > 0:22:17There's no-one else around here willing to make trouble.

0:22:17 > 0:22:20Until now. THEY CHUCKLE

0:22:20 > 0:22:22Well, not so bone-idle any more, I see.

0:22:22 > 0:22:25Well, they still like to push me around, but this thing...

0:22:25 > 0:22:29Well, it gives me a modicum of autonomy. You?

0:22:32 > 0:22:34Big Mouth has filled you in already, hasn't he?

0:22:34 > 0:22:36No, don't pretend he hasn't.

0:22:36 > 0:22:38He means well.

0:22:39 > 0:22:42Usually code for not listening, isn't it?

0:22:42 > 0:22:46- You're not talking like a doc any more - you're one of us now!- Ah!

0:22:46 > 0:22:48SHEILAGH CHUCKLES

0:22:48 > 0:22:50What's he doing here?

0:22:50 > 0:22:51Erm...

0:22:51 > 0:22:54he's just doing me a favour.

0:22:54 > 0:22:56- Don't expect too much of him.- OK.

0:22:58 > 0:22:59She's of sound mind,

0:22:59 > 0:23:02even if that mind is full of celebrity gossip and lewd jokes.

0:23:02 > 0:23:05She knows all the pertinent information.

0:23:05 > 0:23:08It's not up to you to persuade her.

0:23:12 > 0:23:13Thank you.

0:23:14 > 0:23:15Think back, OK?

0:23:15 > 0:23:19You told me that a consultant was dealing with a manic AAU,

0:23:19 > 0:23:21asking for test results and drugs, and....

0:23:21 > 0:23:23We think that consultant was Ric Griffin,

0:23:23 > 0:23:25and he wasn't chasing results,

0:23:25 > 0:23:28he was asking for anticoagulants for a patient.

0:23:30 > 0:23:32Griffin, as in the doctor who killed someone?

0:23:32 > 0:23:35Erm...he's in a bit of trouble, yeah.

0:23:35 > 0:23:36Because a woman died,

0:23:36 > 0:23:39and he can't prove that he tried to do his best by her.

0:23:39 > 0:23:42He thought that she'd been given the drugs he prescribed, but she hadn't.

0:23:45 > 0:23:49I remember he asked about something for a patient,

0:23:49 > 0:23:52but he was gone before I could catch what he said properly.

0:23:52 > 0:23:54But he tried, yeah?

0:23:54 > 0:23:57It was definitely you that he asked for anticoagulants?

0:23:57 > 0:24:00I told you, I haven't a clue what he asked.

0:24:00 > 0:24:02He gave an order, but I don't know if he was even talking to me.

0:24:02 > 0:24:04I'm accustomed to people looking me in the eye

0:24:04 > 0:24:06- if they're asking me a favour. - So he...

0:24:06 > 0:24:08He gave an order, so if you didn't understand,

0:24:08 > 0:24:11why didn't you follow it up, or tell someone?

0:24:11 > 0:24:13You're accusing me of doing something wrong,

0:24:13 > 0:24:15but I wasn't even meant to be there that day.

0:24:15 > 0:24:17And I'm not even a nurse any more.

0:24:17 > 0:24:19We need you to go to the police and tell them the truth.

0:24:19 > 0:24:21- You might have to stand up in court. - No way!

0:24:21 > 0:24:23- I can't get caught up in this. - No, no, no.

0:24:23 > 0:24:25I know it sounds scary, but he needs you.

0:24:25 > 0:24:28I don't need this. Get out of my way.

0:24:31 > 0:24:32Donna.

0:24:45 > 0:24:47What did you do that for?

0:24:47 > 0:24:49You can't make people do things they don't want to do.

0:24:49 > 0:24:53Well, I am not giving up that easily. Ric wouldn't.

0:24:59 > 0:25:02Why haven't you told me about David's memorial?

0:25:02 > 0:25:04I thought we were here to discuss Ollie.

0:25:04 > 0:25:06Well, the two are related, don't you think?

0:25:08 > 0:25:11Let me take over the lead on Ollie's case.

0:25:11 > 0:25:13Take a step back, for both your sakes.

0:25:13 > 0:25:16For both our sakes? John, you're making more of this than there is.

0:25:16 > 0:25:17You reckon?

0:25:17 > 0:25:20How much overtime have you clocked up in the last couple of weeks?

0:25:20 > 0:25:22How many other patients have you passed on to colleagues

0:25:22 > 0:25:25so you can concentrate on this one?

0:25:25 > 0:25:27I'm saying this as a friend.

0:25:27 > 0:25:29I told you. I can handle it.

0:25:30 > 0:25:31Amira?

0:25:31 > 0:25:33Amira!

0:25:33 > 0:25:35Amira...

0:25:35 > 0:25:38Get away from me! You do know I work in a shoe shop now?

0:25:38 > 0:25:41- All this is nothing to do with me any more!- I know. I know.

0:25:41 > 0:25:44And trust me, I wish I didn't have to ask you to do any of this.

0:25:44 > 0:25:46I know how you feel.

0:25:46 > 0:25:48I've been called as a witness in the trial, too,

0:25:48 > 0:25:51and the thought of standing up in court is keeping me awake at night.

0:25:51 > 0:25:53So why are you trying to make me do it?

0:25:53 > 0:25:55Because you could save a decent man from going to prison

0:25:55 > 0:25:57for something he didn't do.

0:25:58 > 0:26:00You're not in any trouble.

0:26:00 > 0:26:01And no matter what you say up there,

0:26:01 > 0:26:03you're not going to get in any trouble,

0:26:03 > 0:26:05but you need to do this.

0:26:05 > 0:26:08Trust me. Please.

0:26:08 > 0:26:10I don't need to do anything.

0:26:10 > 0:26:11You would never have gotten into this job

0:26:11 > 0:26:13if you didn't want to do some good.

0:26:14 > 0:26:16You still can.

0:26:18 > 0:26:19I'll think about it.

0:26:19 > 0:26:21DONNA SIGHS

0:26:21 > 0:26:22DISTANT SIREN WAILS

0:26:24 > 0:26:28I'm so delighted you changed your mind and decided to consult.

0:26:28 > 0:26:31- Me too.- I know what you've been keeping from me!

0:26:31 > 0:26:32- I worked it out! - Looks like you're needed.

0:26:32 > 0:26:35- Now, if you want to step out, that's absolutely fine.- Absolutely not.

0:26:35 > 0:26:37Did Zosia know?

0:26:37 > 0:26:39About us. Did your husband...?

0:26:39 > 0:26:41- Ollie, I don't know what you think...- I remember...

0:26:41 > 0:26:43telling someone that I loved them.

0:26:43 > 0:26:45Feeling so strongly about it, and...

0:26:46 > 0:26:49Well, the evidence all adds up - it has to be you!

0:26:49 > 0:26:52I abandoned my research project for your sake, I... I saved your life,

0:26:52 > 0:26:55and you, you... You've been by my side day in, day out,

0:26:55 > 0:26:58like a devoted nursemaid. Of course we're in love!

0:26:58 > 0:27:00I can't believe I didn't spot it before!

0:27:02 > 0:27:05Maybe you should talk somewhere private.

0:27:05 > 0:27:07- Do you want to use the office? - No, that wouldn't be appropriate.

0:27:07 > 0:27:09Why are you being embarrassed?

0:27:09 > 0:27:11It's not like we have to be secretive any more.

0:27:13 > 0:27:15- Ollie...- Do you have any idea what it's like

0:27:15 > 0:27:17to only remember snapshots of your life?

0:27:21 > 0:27:22You can help me - why won't you?

0:27:24 > 0:27:28I need to understand where these breadcrumbs are leading me.

0:27:30 > 0:27:32- I'm sorry. I have to go. - Roxanna! Roxanna...

0:27:33 > 0:27:35- Wait!- Ollie...

0:27:54 > 0:27:56If this is really what you want...

0:27:56 > 0:27:59you need to sign it, and then give it to a nurse,

0:27:59 > 0:28:02who will put it on your notes.

0:28:02 > 0:28:05I've signed it to say that you're of capacity,

0:28:05 > 0:28:07and another doctor has co-signed.

0:28:09 > 0:28:11Whatever you decide...

0:28:11 > 0:28:12HE SIGHS

0:28:12 > 0:28:14..please consider Lofty.

0:28:22 > 0:28:25SHE SIGHS

0:28:25 > 0:28:28- Say, "Sausages."- Sausages.

0:28:30 > 0:28:33MRI was normal, so that rules out IBD,

0:28:33 > 0:28:36and the vomiting symptoms are too severe to be IBS.

0:28:36 > 0:28:39We're sure he isn't lying about not being able to keep anything down?

0:28:39 > 0:28:41I've had a wardrobe change to prove it.

0:28:41 > 0:28:44Well, actually, all that proves is that he's vomiting.

0:28:44 > 0:28:46Munchausen's?

0:28:46 > 0:28:49Well, he could have easily taken something to make himself throw up.

0:28:49 > 0:28:51And he's certainly lapping up all the attention.

0:28:51 > 0:28:53There's two kisses.

0:28:53 > 0:28:56Don't tell anyone, or they'll all be after the special treatment.

0:28:58 > 0:29:01- Is that you? - I lost 10 stone in two years.

0:29:01 > 0:29:05I told you it took hard work to be this good looking.

0:29:05 > 0:29:07That is a lot of weight.

0:29:09 > 0:29:12- Was that rude? - Actually, it's a compliment.

0:29:12 > 0:29:14Or a cause.

0:29:23 > 0:29:25Henrik, it's me.

0:29:25 > 0:29:28I suppose you've heard about the dedication to David.

0:29:28 > 0:29:30It's an honour, really.

0:29:31 > 0:29:33I need to...

0:29:36 > 0:29:37Just call me when you get this.

0:29:42 > 0:29:44MACHINES BLEEP

0:29:44 > 0:29:47SHEILAGH GASPS FOR BREATH

0:29:47 > 0:29:49BLEEPING QUICKENS

0:29:50 > 0:29:53RAPID BLEEPING

0:29:59 > 0:30:01- MUTED:- Dom?

0:30:01 > 0:30:04Dom? Dom, oxygen!

0:30:04 > 0:30:06SHEILAGH GASPS FOR BREATH

0:30:06 > 0:30:09RAPID BLEEPING

0:30:14 > 0:30:16SHEILAGH BREATHES DEEPLY

0:30:20 > 0:30:22She might come round to the idea.

0:30:22 > 0:30:24She doesn't even know Ric.

0:30:24 > 0:30:26What are the chances that a stranger

0:30:26 > 0:30:28will put themselves through all of that?

0:30:34 > 0:30:36I haven't even heard of SMA syndrome before.

0:30:36 > 0:30:39It's when a part of the intestine becomes compressed

0:30:39 > 0:30:41between two arteries, causing a blockage.

0:30:41 > 0:30:43It can happen to people with severe weight loss.

0:30:43 > 0:30:46See? I'm not all about the bling.

0:30:46 > 0:30:49Well, it should earn you a few brownie points with Ms Campbell.

0:30:49 > 0:30:52What, more than coffee and doughnuts, do you think?

0:30:52 > 0:30:55I'm a registrar. I'm supposed to expect the unexpected.

0:30:59 > 0:31:03If an F1 had picked up on something like this, on the other hand...

0:31:03 > 0:31:04But I didn't, did I?

0:31:07 > 0:31:09You're saying you'd hand me the credit

0:31:09 > 0:31:12for an awesome diagnosis, on a plate, for no reason?

0:31:12 > 0:31:14It wouldn't be for no reason.

0:31:14 > 0:31:17It would be to prove to you that we're actually on the same side.

0:31:20 > 0:31:21RAPID BLEEPING

0:31:23 > 0:31:25Right, local's on board.

0:31:25 > 0:31:27- Gran!- Her lung collapsed.

0:31:27 > 0:31:30We need to insert the chest drain to help her breathe.

0:31:36 > 0:31:37Drain.

0:31:42 > 0:31:44MACHINE BLEEPS

0:31:44 > 0:31:47OK, stats are improving.

0:31:49 > 0:31:50HE SIGHS

0:31:55 > 0:31:58CLASSICAL PIANO MUSIC

0:32:01 > 0:32:02After you.

0:32:02 > 0:32:04Sorry to barge in.

0:32:04 > 0:32:06That's quite all right.

0:32:06 > 0:32:08Good to see you.

0:32:08 > 0:32:11I've just been doing a little tidying,

0:32:11 > 0:32:12as one must from time to time.

0:32:12 > 0:32:14MUSIC STOPS

0:32:15 > 0:32:19- Oliver Valentine - the TMS seems to be working.- Ah.

0:32:19 > 0:32:21His memories seem to be improving.

0:32:21 > 0:32:24And then he tried to push things, and I tried...

0:32:25 > 0:32:27And everything got a bit muddled.

0:32:30 > 0:32:32Forgive me...

0:32:32 > 0:32:34Friends are always welcome but why are you really here?

0:32:38 > 0:32:40And you've ruled out the usual suspects?

0:32:40 > 0:32:42Yep. All the tests came back normal.

0:32:42 > 0:32:45Then we saw how much weight he'd actually lost, and...

0:32:45 > 0:32:48And it came to me. SMA syndrome.

0:32:48 > 0:32:52See, the patient behaves like he has a high mechanical bowel obstruction.

0:32:52 > 0:32:54All the luminal investigations came back normal,

0:32:54 > 0:32:58and his CT scan shows he has a long-dependent mesentery.

0:32:58 > 0:33:01Quite a catch for an F1. You should consider writing it up.

0:33:01 > 0:33:04Yes! I mean, I would love to. Thank you.

0:33:04 > 0:33:07Good. Right, well, full steam ahead.

0:33:07 > 0:33:09Don't look too chipper!

0:33:09 > 0:33:12I just signed you up for a shedload of extracurricular work.

0:33:12 > 0:33:13Thank you!

0:33:16 > 0:33:17LABOURED BREATHING

0:33:22 > 0:33:24Hey, John.

0:33:24 > 0:33:29Would you mind ordering me another chest X-ray for when she's awake?

0:33:29 > 0:33:32- Oh, and is this all up to date? - Yes.- Thank you.

0:33:46 > 0:33:47HE SIGHS

0:33:50 > 0:33:52She's worn out, poor thing.

0:33:56 > 0:33:58What you lot did for her...

0:33:58 > 0:34:00I could have lost her.

0:34:04 > 0:34:05Hey.

0:34:11 > 0:34:14I don't want to scare you, but I think you might owe Dom a drink.

0:34:17 > 0:34:18Your lung collapsed.

0:34:18 > 0:34:21It was a bit touch-and-go, but he brought you back.

0:34:26 > 0:34:28You should have let me go.

0:34:28 > 0:34:30Gran...

0:34:30 > 0:34:32I signed the form.

0:34:32 > 0:34:36I signed it - it's in my bag! Look!

0:34:37 > 0:34:39I signed it like you told me to!

0:34:54 > 0:34:56They want me to make a speech.

0:34:56 > 0:34:59Sum up David's life and work.

0:34:59 > 0:35:01Rather a tall order, I'd say.

0:35:01 > 0:35:04I've been working on the same sentences for the past week.

0:35:04 > 0:35:06Getting nowhere.

0:35:06 > 0:35:09You haven't RSVP'd.

0:35:09 > 0:35:13Well, public engagements hardly seem appropriate,

0:35:13 > 0:35:14given the circumstances.

0:35:16 > 0:35:19They invited you because you deserve to be there, Henrik.

0:35:19 > 0:35:22Most likely, simply out of obligation.

0:35:23 > 0:35:25I want you to be there.

0:35:26 > 0:35:28You were one of David's closest friends.

0:35:28 > 0:35:30Your past, your life, doesn't stop because...

0:35:30 > 0:35:33The lives of others have stopped, though, haven't they?

0:35:33 > 0:35:37Oliver Valentine. His life, his career on hold.

0:35:37 > 0:35:39Possibly indefinitely.

0:35:40 > 0:35:43Raf Di Lucca.

0:35:43 > 0:35:45Life, marriage...

0:35:45 > 0:35:47are no more.

0:35:47 > 0:35:50You aren't responsible for that.

0:35:50 > 0:35:52You aren't the cause of anything that happened that day.

0:35:55 > 0:35:58On a very superficial level, no, I'm not.

0:35:58 > 0:36:00But if you look even a little closer,

0:36:00 > 0:36:02no-one else is to blame.

0:36:04 > 0:36:05Is all this...

0:36:08 > 0:36:11Are you investigating the shooting?

0:36:11 > 0:36:12HE SIGHS

0:36:12 > 0:36:15I thought that if I could understand the what,

0:36:15 > 0:36:18then the why might be forthcoming.

0:36:26 > 0:36:29See, first of all, he shut down all the lights to cause panic.

0:36:31 > 0:36:33He then created chaos on AAU,

0:36:33 > 0:36:35so that the hospital would be put into lockdown,

0:36:35 > 0:36:37lifts out of operation,

0:36:37 > 0:36:40so that he that he could then go to the higher floors unimpeded,

0:36:40 > 0:36:44and systematically target his intended victims,

0:36:44 > 0:36:45yourself included.

0:36:47 > 0:36:49Miss Naylor...

0:36:49 > 0:36:50Mr Di Lucca...

0:36:50 > 0:36:53were simply in the wrong place at the wrong time.

0:36:53 > 0:36:56Collateral damage, for which he cared not one jot.

0:36:59 > 0:37:01See, this was no crime of passion.

0:37:01 > 0:37:03No sudden flash of anger.

0:37:03 > 0:37:06Deliberate, calculated...

0:37:06 > 0:37:08evil.

0:37:09 > 0:37:10My son.

0:37:10 > 0:37:11My creation.

0:37:12 > 0:37:14Stop torturing yourself.

0:37:15 > 0:37:19You will never understand why Fredrik did what he did.

0:37:19 > 0:37:22All this is just heaping on the guilt.

0:37:27 > 0:37:28I AM guilty.

0:37:28 > 0:37:30No.

0:37:32 > 0:37:34Guilty of neglect.

0:37:35 > 0:37:37Guilty of naivete.

0:37:40 > 0:37:43Fredrik's method was a message, to me,

0:37:43 > 0:37:45written in the blood of those I love.

0:37:53 > 0:37:55I understand.

0:38:00 > 0:38:01It wasn't in her notes.

0:38:01 > 0:38:04I can't follow a directive that isn't in her notes.

0:38:04 > 0:38:07You don't need to cover your back. She's not going to make a complaint.

0:38:07 > 0:38:08How could you not tell me?

0:38:09 > 0:38:12I tried to talk her out of it! I even roped in Oliver to help me.

0:38:12 > 0:38:14I said everything that you would have said.

0:38:14 > 0:38:17How could you have?! She's not your gran. You don't love her.

0:38:17 > 0:38:20She's been feeling so low that she'd rather die than fight

0:38:20 > 0:38:21whatever's wrong with her, and I had no idea.

0:38:21 > 0:38:24If that had been your gran or your mum, or anyone you cared about,

0:38:24 > 0:38:27I never would have sneaked around like that, cos I care about you.

0:38:29 > 0:38:31Clearly, you don't feel the same.

0:38:31 > 0:38:33Right. Maybe I'm not the problem here.

0:38:33 > 0:38:36If you would have only listened to what Sheilagh wanted...

0:38:36 > 0:38:39She's sick. I've been trying to sort her life out.

0:38:39 > 0:38:41She's a grown woman and she wants to make her own decisions!

0:38:43 > 0:38:44LOFTY SIGHS

0:38:46 > 0:38:47I thought you understood me.

0:00:00 > 0:00:00How stupid was I?

0:38:53 > 0:38:54HE SIGHS

0:38:58 > 0:38:59It's called SMA syndrome.

0:38:59 > 0:39:01Without treatment, things would likely progress.

0:39:01 > 0:39:04Stomach pain, possibly a blocked bowel.

0:39:04 > 0:39:05And losing the weight caused this?

0:39:05 > 0:39:08It's...very rare.

0:39:08 > 0:39:10Bad luck.

0:39:10 > 0:39:11We'll treat conservatively,

0:39:11 > 0:39:14but we might have to insert a feeding tube for a while.

0:39:14 > 0:39:17It's important we ensure you're getting adequate nutrition.

0:39:17 > 0:39:20Oh, that'll go down well on my next job, won't it?

0:39:20 > 0:39:22"Could you make sure to get my good side,

0:39:22 > 0:39:23"and not this hideous feeding tube?"

0:39:23 > 0:39:27I'm sure there's more to you than just smiling for the camera.

0:39:27 > 0:39:29Like what?

0:39:30 > 0:39:31I don't know, erm...

0:39:32 > 0:39:35..family? People who love you?

0:39:35 > 0:39:36Hobbies?

0:39:36 > 0:39:38Are you trying to be funny?

0:39:40 > 0:39:43We'll be back to talk you through a treatment plan in due course.

0:39:45 > 0:39:46Is he for real?

0:39:46 > 0:39:49He was probably just as vain and obnoxious before he lost the weight.

0:39:49 > 0:39:51If you want to change...

0:39:51 > 0:39:54- you really need to change.- Mmm.

0:39:54 > 0:39:57Still, at least one good thing's come out of all of this -

0:39:57 > 0:39:58I've got a chance of being published!

0:39:58 > 0:40:00Mmm-hmm. If you put in the hours.

0:40:06 > 0:40:09John thinks I'm pushing Oliver too hard.

0:40:09 > 0:40:12That I might be doing more harm than good.

0:40:12 > 0:40:14I see.

0:40:14 > 0:40:18He wants to draw a straight line between...

0:40:18 > 0:40:20losing David and saving Oliver.

0:40:20 > 0:40:23But there isn't one.

0:40:23 > 0:40:26But there may be a line of some sort?

0:40:28 > 0:40:31It just feels like some good should come out of this.

0:40:32 > 0:40:34Some semblance of hope for the future.

0:40:34 > 0:40:35Hmm.

0:40:37 > 0:40:39How did we get here?

0:40:39 > 0:40:43One minute, we're young, our whole careers ahead of us,

0:40:43 > 0:40:46the four of us with the future at our feet.

0:40:46 > 0:40:49Yes, there's nothing so cruel as time.

0:40:49 > 0:40:51- It feels like yesterday.- Mmm.

0:40:52 > 0:40:53Every time I look at John,

0:40:53 > 0:40:55I remember the day he introduced me to David.

0:40:57 > 0:41:00I knew on our first date, that was it.

0:41:00 > 0:41:03Yes, I do recall you losing interest in any other options

0:41:03 > 0:41:05fairly swiftly.

0:41:05 > 0:41:06SHE LAUGHS

0:41:09 > 0:41:12We were always together, the four of us.

0:41:13 > 0:41:15It felt like we could conquer the world.

0:41:15 > 0:41:17Ah, the arrogance of youth.

0:41:17 > 0:41:21- And I could drink the three of you under the table.- Oh, yes.

0:41:21 > 0:41:23Of course, you never had any time for anyone or anything

0:41:23 > 0:41:24that wasn't work.

0:41:28 > 0:41:30- I'm sorry.- No, it's fine.

0:41:33 > 0:41:35You're a good man, Henrik.

0:41:35 > 0:41:37Don't let yourself be poisoned by this.

0:41:38 > 0:41:40Don't lose yourself...

0:41:40 > 0:41:43or allow us to lose you.

0:41:44 > 0:41:46We need you.

0:41:46 > 0:41:48Your strength, your kindness.

0:41:50 > 0:41:51I wasn't very kind to my son.

0:41:54 > 0:41:56We're here.

0:41:58 > 0:42:01Stay with us. Please.

0:42:05 > 0:42:08I remember proposing to her. I remember.

0:42:09 > 0:42:12But...was it Roxanna?

0:42:14 > 0:42:16Or was it...someone else?

0:42:24 > 0:42:26Maybe you should try and get some sleep.

0:42:26 > 0:42:28You mean Zosia? HE CHUCKLES

0:00:00 > 0:00:00I thought it was Roxanna, and it was actually Zosia.

0:42:34 > 0:42:35OLLIE SIGHS

0:42:36 > 0:42:38I don't know how much longer I can do this.

0:42:38 > 0:42:41It's like my own feelings are... playing tricks on me.

0:42:45 > 0:42:48Love shouldn't be this complicated, should it?

0:42:48 > 0:42:50DOM SIGHS

0:42:50 > 0:42:52Can you tell me a little bit more about Zosia?

0:42:54 > 0:42:55Please?

0:42:56 > 0:42:58Of course.

0:43:07 > 0:43:08BIRDSONG

0:43:10 > 0:43:13CLASSICAL PIANO MUSIC

0:43:27 > 0:43:29Tea?

0:43:29 > 0:43:30Thank you.

0:43:31 > 0:43:35I've been up all night writing the speech for David's dedication.

0:43:36 > 0:43:38Er...no.

0:43:38 > 0:43:40I wouldn't want to spoil it before the big day.

0:43:43 > 0:43:45You're still not coming, are you?

0:43:45 > 0:43:49Well, as I said, it's a question of propriety.

0:43:49 > 0:43:51So you're going to stay in this room forever,

0:43:51 > 0:43:56punishing yourself for something you didn't do?

0:43:56 > 0:43:58You don't have to hide yourself away, Henrik.

0:44:00 > 0:44:02I'll leave you to it, if I may.

0:44:13 > 0:44:15POP MUSIC ON RADIO

0:44:22 > 0:44:23MUSIC STOPS

0:44:27 > 0:44:29You're back.

0:44:31 > 0:44:32I'll do it.

0:44:33 > 0:44:36I know it's the right thing, it's just...

0:44:36 > 0:44:38I'm scared.

0:44:59 > 0:45:02I know Sheilagh would probably prefer whisky, but...

0:45:06 > 0:45:07Let's just talk.

0:45:10 > 0:45:12HE SWITCHES BETWEEN RADIO CHANNELS

0:45:19 > 0:45:22Ollie. Have you got a minute?

0:45:25 > 0:45:26I let her down.

0:45:29 > 0:45:31We used to talk about things.

0:45:33 > 0:45:35She's given up on life, and I didn't have a clue.

0:45:37 > 0:45:39Lofty, no-one has done more for her than you have.

0:45:40 > 0:45:44Maybe that's why she felt she couldn't tell you what she wanted.

0:45:44 > 0:45:46Because she thought you'd talk her out of it.

0:45:46 > 0:45:48How could I?

0:45:48 > 0:45:50She's scared of the future. I am. I...

0:45:50 > 0:45:53I keep going back and forth with occupational therapy.

0:45:53 > 0:45:55There aren't enough resources to go around,

0:45:55 > 0:45:58so we have to wait until they become available.

0:45:58 > 0:46:00Meanwhile, she's stuck in hospital getting worse,

0:46:00 > 0:46:01which makes being discharged

0:46:01 > 0:46:03and actually getting those resources even harder.

0:46:06 > 0:46:09How can society treat her as a burden when she needs help the most?

0:46:10 > 0:46:12You don't see her as a burden.

0:46:13 > 0:46:16So maybe we just need to make her see that.

0:46:22 > 0:46:24So, this is where it all happened.

0:46:43 > 0:46:45Ollie, you and I were never in love.

0:46:45 > 0:46:48The memories that you have are of you and Zosia, not me.

0:46:48 > 0:46:49HE SIGHS

0:46:51 > 0:46:54We've been spending too much time together.

0:46:54 > 0:46:58I've been emotionally invested in your treatment.

0:46:58 > 0:47:01You could sense that, and your mind has played tricks.

0:47:01 > 0:47:04I sort of wish I hadn't declared my undying love

0:47:04 > 0:47:06in front of the entire ward.

0:47:06 > 0:47:10This is my fault, not yours. I haven't been a very good doctor.

0:47:10 > 0:47:13Don't be ridiculous.

0:47:13 > 0:47:16I'm so sorry I wasn't honest sooner, but...

0:47:16 > 0:47:20I've been holding back for my sake, because...

0:47:20 > 0:47:22talking about it...

0:47:24 > 0:47:25..reliving it, is...

0:47:25 > 0:47:28Too painful.

0:47:28 > 0:47:29Yeah, I understand.

0:47:31 > 0:47:33I wanted to make you better.

0:47:33 > 0:47:35I think I've inadvertently made you worse.

0:47:37 > 0:47:39I think it's time I told you the truth.

0:47:43 > 0:47:44On the day of the shooting...

0:47:45 > 0:47:47..David had a stroke...

0:47:47 > 0:47:50VOICE ECHOES: Start ventilating, please.

0:47:51 > 0:47:53You were operating.

0:47:53 > 0:47:56You were about to take him off bypass, when...

0:47:56 > 0:47:58BLEEPING

0:47:58 > 0:47:59DOOR BUZZES

0:47:59 > 0:48:01- VOICE ECHOES: - Please, put that down!

0:48:01 > 0:48:04Turn it to me. Don't point that at her!

0:48:04 > 0:48:05GUNSHOT

0:48:06 > 0:48:07He pointed his gun...

0:48:09 > 0:48:10..at you.

0:48:12 > 0:48:15I was targeted.

0:48:15 > 0:48:16You distracted him.

0:48:18 > 0:48:20You saved my life.

0:48:20 > 0:48:23- You had a cerebral haemorrhage. - HE SIGHS

0:48:23 > 0:48:24I knew I could save you.

0:48:24 > 0:48:27The chances of David surviving were...

0:48:29 > 0:48:32Besides...dementia is an old foe.

0:48:34 > 0:48:38David wouldn't have been sorry it was quick.

0:48:38 > 0:48:42It meant he was spared the thing he had nightmares about.

0:48:42 > 0:48:44A future he wouldn't have wanted...

0:48:46 > 0:48:48..where he didn't even recognise himself.

0:48:52 > 0:48:55I've been feeling guilty...

0:48:55 > 0:48:58because I didn't try harder to save him.

0:48:59 > 0:49:01I thought if I saved you,

0:49:01 > 0:49:03it would make his death less pointless.

0:49:06 > 0:49:08That's where things got confused.

0:49:11 > 0:49:14I still think TMS is the right treatment,

0:49:14 > 0:49:17but we need to dial it back. Take things more slowly.

0:49:17 > 0:49:21Have more realistic expectations, for both our sakes.

0:49:21 > 0:49:24Of course, I understand if you'd rather Professor Gaskell

0:49:24 > 0:49:27- took over...- No, I don't think that'll be necessary.

0:49:27 > 0:49:30Especially now I know that you're not going to leap my bones.

0:49:30 > 0:49:31THEY CHUCKLE

0:49:32 > 0:49:34So...

0:49:36 > 0:49:39..I took the bullet...

0:49:40 > 0:49:41..for you...

0:49:47 > 0:49:48Why?

0:49:51 > 0:49:53Because...

0:49:54 > 0:49:55..you're selfless.

0:49:57 > 0:49:59Kind.

0:50:01 > 0:50:03Brave.

0:50:22 > 0:50:24So, once we're sure you're stable enough,

0:50:24 > 0:50:27and gastroenterology have a bed available, we'll move you.

0:50:27 > 0:50:28No hurry.

0:50:28 > 0:50:30Sorry if I was a bit snappy yesterday.

0:50:30 > 0:50:32It's just a shock to hear your glittering career

0:50:32 > 0:50:35- might be about to go from under you. - Yeah, I bet.

0:50:35 > 0:50:37Still, if my years of massage and aromatherapy

0:50:37 > 0:50:39have taught me anything,

0:50:39 > 0:50:41it's that sometimes you just have to sit back,

0:50:41 > 0:50:43relax, and wait for another door to open.

0:50:43 > 0:50:45And has it?

0:50:45 > 0:50:47I put a call in to my agent.

0:50:47 > 0:50:50Apparently, there are medical supply catalogues

0:50:50 > 0:50:52just begging for models.

0:50:52 > 0:50:56Yeah, it shouldn't be too long now before you can be discharged.

0:50:56 > 0:50:57- UNDER HER BREATH - Hopefully...

0:50:57 > 0:50:59At least let me do you a signed photo!

0:51:17 > 0:51:19Why would you suggest I write an article

0:51:19 > 0:51:22on something you'd already written about?

0:51:22 > 0:51:25I didn't. Ms Campbell did.

0:51:25 > 0:51:26I just...

0:51:26 > 0:51:29neglected to mention I'd already done the job.

0:51:29 > 0:51:31Why would you do that?

0:51:31 > 0:51:33I'm teaching you, just like Ms Campbell wanted.

0:51:33 > 0:51:36Yeah, don't pass this of as some misguided attempt

0:51:36 > 0:51:38to teach me a valuable lesson.

0:51:38 > 0:51:40You need to stay sharp and toughen up.

0:51:40 > 0:51:43SHE SIGHS Don't leap before you look.

0:51:43 > 0:51:46You won't always have a registrar who's keen to look out for you.

0:51:46 > 0:51:48You'll thank me one day!

0:51:49 > 0:51:51Fine, I admit it.

0:51:51 > 0:51:53Professor Gaskell's avoiding me.

0:51:55 > 0:51:58Oh, look at you! Cat that got the cream!

0:51:58 > 0:52:00I'm not, I swear I'm not!

0:52:00 > 0:52:03Oh, if you could just admit to me that the sheen has come off

0:52:03 > 0:52:07Mr Guru Gaskell just a little bit, it would make my week.

0:52:07 > 0:52:09Well, turns out he might be human after all.

0:52:09 > 0:52:12Yes! Yes, at last!

0:52:15 > 0:52:17John, I've revised Oliver's treatment plan.

0:52:17 > 0:52:20TMS on a bi-weekly basis with a period of observation after each.

0:52:20 > 0:52:23- Good.- No more running before we can walk.

0:52:24 > 0:52:28I should have listened to you. You were being a friend.

0:52:28 > 0:52:30I saw Henrik.

0:52:30 > 0:52:31He's going to need his friends, too.

0:52:36 > 0:52:39You don't have pulmonary embolism.

0:52:39 > 0:52:40It's pneumothorax.

0:52:40 > 0:52:44So small, preliminary X-rays couldn't pick it up.

0:52:44 > 0:52:47So I'm not going to drop down dead at any moment?

0:52:47 > 0:52:51You're just as likely to get run over by a bus, like the rest of us.

0:52:51 > 0:52:53Congratulations.

0:52:53 > 0:52:56Course, if that DNAR had ended up in your notes

0:52:56 > 0:52:58instead of your handbag, we wouldn't be having this conversation.

0:52:58 > 0:53:01Honestly, Gran, what on earth were you thinking?

0:53:01 > 0:53:03I was thinking that I'd been stuck in here for weeks,

0:53:03 > 0:53:06and I did not want to be stuck in here until I popped my clogs!

0:53:06 > 0:53:08Well, I'm going to pull out all the stops

0:53:08 > 0:53:10to make sure you can go home as soon as you're better.

0:53:10 > 0:53:12Whatever happens, I'm here.

0:53:13 > 0:53:18Well, I suppose I'd better hang around a little bit longer.

0:53:18 > 0:53:21If only to see how the two of you pan out.

0:53:22 > 0:53:25So, er...when's your third date?

0:53:29 > 0:53:30Er...

0:53:30 > 0:53:32Tonight?

0:53:32 > 0:53:34Albie's?

0:53:35 > 0:53:37But, first, though...

0:53:40 > 0:53:42..I'll let you do the honours.

0:53:48 > 0:53:51MUSIC: "Only You" by Yazoo.

0:53:51 > 0:53:54Ah, they're still at the bar. Right, let's get in there.

0:53:54 > 0:53:55A pint of...

0:53:55 > 0:53:57- ALL:- Ahh!

0:53:57 > 0:53:59Such a shame!

0:53:59 > 0:54:00Mwah! Love you!

0:54:01 > 0:54:03CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:54:04 > 0:54:06Karaoke again?

0:54:06 > 0:54:09Why can't people leave it in the '90s like everyone else did?

0:54:09 > 0:54:10# Looking from a window above

0:54:10 > 0:54:13# It's like a story of love

0:54:13 > 0:54:17# Can you hear me?

0:54:17 > 0:54:20# Came back only yesterday

0:54:20 > 0:54:23# I'm moving further away

0:54:23 > 0:54:26# Want you near me

0:54:26 > 0:54:30# All I needed was the love you gave

0:54:31 > 0:54:34# All I needed for another day

0:54:34 > 0:54:37# And all I ever knew

0:54:39 > 0:54:40# Only you... #

0:54:40 > 0:54:42CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:54:44 > 0:54:46- Let's go. - # Sometimes when I think of her name

0:54:46 > 0:54:49# When it's only a game

0:54:49 > 0:54:52# And I need you... #

0:54:53 > 0:54:55HE SIGHS

0:55:01 > 0:55:03I love you.

0:55:04 > 0:55:07It wasn't a mistake when I said it yesterday.

0:55:07 > 0:55:11Although it was unplanned, and...really badly timed.

0:55:12 > 0:55:13I meant it.

0:55:13 > 0:55:16You were the one that insisted we were just friends, not me.

0:55:16 > 0:55:18Yeah, well, you know, I'm particularly fond

0:55:18 > 0:55:19of self-sabotage, so...

0:55:19 > 0:55:20THEY CHUCKLE

0:55:20 > 0:55:23Is that why you couldn't admit the truth yesterday?

0:55:23 > 0:55:24I was scared.

0:55:26 > 0:55:29And besides, I mean, we're not even a thing yet, you know?

0:55:29 > 0:55:31It just all feels a little bit...

0:55:33 > 0:55:34- Whirlwind?- Hmm!

0:55:35 > 0:55:38Well, we both know that's just another word for crazy!

0:55:39 > 0:55:42- I mean, we've only had three dates. - Oi, four!

0:55:42 > 0:55:45You don't call sitting on a cold bench a hot date?

0:55:45 > 0:55:46THEY CHUCKLE

0:55:46 > 0:55:47DOM SIGHS

0:55:47 > 0:55:50I... I know this hasn't been easy for either of us.

0:55:50 > 0:55:51Especially you.

0:55:53 > 0:55:54I just...

0:55:54 > 0:55:57don't feel quite ready to say it back yet, that's all.

0:55:59 > 0:56:00Is that all right?

0:56:10 > 0:56:12When you're ready.

0:56:15 > 0:56:17- ROXANNA:- In everyone's life, there is someone.

0:56:21 > 0:56:25That one defining someone who takes your life and changes it.

0:56:30 > 0:56:35My beautiful, brilliant man has been taken from me too soon.

0:56:36 > 0:56:38I hoped more than anything

0:56:38 > 0:56:41that we would be allowed to grow old together,

0:56:41 > 0:56:46but now, I must find a way to go on without him,

0:56:46 > 0:56:48and to honour his memory.

0:56:49 > 0:56:51I will do this.

0:56:51 > 0:56:55I will continue to learn from David,

0:56:55 > 0:56:57overcome this tragedy,

0:56:57 > 0:57:01and transform it into a hope for the future.