0:00:02 > 0:00:05That is the most selfish, mindless piece of driving
0:00:05 > 0:00:06I have ever witnessed.
0:00:06 > 0:00:07Keep your hair on, I'll be under 60 seconds.
0:00:07 > 0:00:09- Idiot.- Snotty bitch.
0:00:09 > 0:00:13Some braindead, lowlife, trailer trash stole my parking space.
0:00:13 > 0:00:16- And you've met my daughter?- Sorry?
0:00:16 > 0:00:18Now then, we've got some news for you.
0:00:18 > 0:00:20- BOTH:- We're getting married.
0:00:21 > 0:00:24- You're very pretty. - You're magnificent.
0:00:28 > 0:00:32This marriage is over! It is dead! It is redundant!
0:00:32 > 0:00:34It never was!
0:00:34 > 0:00:35We made love.
0:00:35 > 0:00:38It was my birthday, we were both a bit pissed.
0:00:38 > 0:00:42'He's in hospital. He were rushed in last night. He had a heart attack.'
0:00:42 > 0:00:46Did I come to see you last night?
0:00:46 > 0:00:48- Alan?- Or were I dreaming?
0:00:48 > 0:00:54Yes, you did. You came to see me.
0:00:54 > 0:00:56I love you.
0:01:46 > 0:01:49He's come round, he's regained consciousness.
0:01:49 > 0:01:50'Oh, Mum!'
0:01:50 > 0:01:55Gillian's just in with him just now. She's just chatting to him.
0:01:55 > 0:01:57Alan's come round.
0:01:58 > 0:02:00'And are they...?'
0:02:00 > 0:02:03Is he, erm...? Are they confident he's going to...?
0:02:03 > 0:02:08Well, I mean, it's early days but he seems very perky.
0:02:08 > 0:02:10'You mustn't tire him.'
0:02:10 > 0:02:12I'm not going to tire him!
0:02:16 > 0:02:18I love you.
0:02:19 > 0:02:20I love you.
0:02:22 > 0:02:24I think I love Celia as well.
0:02:24 > 0:02:25So do I.
0:02:25 > 0:02:28Hey, you can keep your hands off her. She's mine.
0:02:39 > 0:02:40What are you going to do?
0:02:40 > 0:02:43Are you going to stay with us here, or are you...?
0:02:43 > 0:02:47Oh, I think I'd like to be on hand over the next few days,
0:02:47 > 0:02:49just till we know what's what. I mean, if that's...
0:02:49 > 0:02:51It's wonderful, it's perfect.
0:02:51 > 0:02:54Do you want me to drive over to Harrogate, fetch any of your things?
0:02:54 > 0:02:58No, no. You don't want to be setting off, you need to be here.
0:02:58 > 0:03:02No, I'll get Lady Muck to bring over a few bits and pieces.
0:03:02 > 0:03:03She won't mind.
0:03:03 > 0:03:06- Celia...- What?
0:03:06 > 0:03:08I just... Can I just...
0:03:08 > 0:03:10What, love?
0:03:10 > 0:03:12- ..hug you?- Oh!
0:03:12 > 0:03:13Thank you.
0:03:13 > 0:03:15Thank you for making him so happy
0:03:15 > 0:03:18and thank you for bringing him back.
0:03:18 > 0:03:22Do you know? I think I did.
0:03:22 > 0:03:24No, I know you did.
0:03:24 > 0:03:27Now, you mustn't fall out with him again.
0:03:27 > 0:03:29Oh, well, it was him that fell out with me.
0:03:29 > 0:03:32Yeah, well, whatever. You know what I'm saying.
0:03:32 > 0:03:35I am never going to fall out with him again.
0:03:35 > 0:03:39Ever! About anything.
0:04:01 > 0:04:03There you go, ladies.
0:04:03 > 0:04:05- You're a gem, and a star. - Thanks, love.
0:04:05 > 0:04:08I've penned that ewe up on her own in t'barn and I've made a lasagne.
0:04:08 > 0:04:11There's enough for everybody, if Caroline wants something when she gets here.
0:04:11 > 0:04:13Have you any idea how good he's been?
0:04:13 > 0:04:16It's ME. Are you packing me that suitcase?
0:04:16 > 0:04:18I have packed you that suitcase.
0:04:18 > 0:04:22Robbie says he'll have a bit of supper ready for you when you get here, if you like.
0:04:22 > 0:04:24'Oh, that's lovely.'
0:04:24 > 0:04:26- Thank you, tell him.- 'And Gillian says you're welcome to stop
0:04:26 > 0:04:28'the night, if you don't fancy turning round
0:04:28 > 0:04:32- 'and driving straight back.' - OK. Great. Why not?
0:04:32 > 0:04:34So we'll see you in a bit.
0:04:34 > 0:04:36- Yeah, bye.- 'Drive carefully.'
0:04:36 > 0:04:39Yeah, I will. Bye-bye.
0:04:39 > 0:04:42- Why don't I pop over with her bits and pieces?- You?
0:04:42 > 0:04:46- Well, it'll save you time and... - The best thing you can do, if you want to be useful,
0:04:46 > 0:04:48is stay here with the boys cos I might stay over there.
0:04:48 > 0:04:51- Why?- Well, just tonight. Why not?
0:04:51 > 0:04:55They're old enough to... why don't I come with you?
0:04:55 > 0:04:57Come... What for?
0:04:57 > 0:05:02Well, so I can apologise to everyone for...
0:05:02 > 0:05:04- Well, it was all my fault, wasn't it?- How?
0:05:04 > 0:05:08Well, if I hadn't told Celia about you being...
0:05:08 > 0:05:11And then if she hadn't reacted so badly to that,
0:05:11 > 0:05:13Alan wouldn't have seen how
0:05:13 > 0:05:16small-minded and bigoted she...can be
0:05:16 > 0:05:18and then if they hadn't fallen out about that,
0:05:18 > 0:05:23he might not have got upset and had...had...had the...
0:05:23 > 0:05:24the heart attack.
0:05:25 > 0:05:28But it really is all about you, isn't it?
0:05:28 > 0:05:29That's... That's just...
0:05:29 > 0:05:32When I get back, we really do need to work out what's what
0:05:32 > 0:05:35and whose is what and all the rest of it.
0:05:35 > 0:05:38Boys!
0:05:38 > 0:05:41I'm off over to Halifax.
0:05:43 > 0:05:44Dad's going to be here.
0:05:46 > 0:05:50I'm on my mobile if you want me. I'll see you later.
0:06:16 > 0:06:21- PHONE BEEPS - Mum, you've got a text.
0:06:43 > 0:06:45PHONE BEEPS
0:06:51 > 0:06:53'Halifax?'
0:06:53 > 0:06:56Yeah! He's come round, he's regained consciousness.
0:06:56 > 0:06:57'Oh!'
0:06:57 > 0:07:00Yeah, he's going to be fine. Well, we hope.
0:07:00 > 0:07:03- 'That's...'- I know.
0:07:03 > 0:07:05- ..fantastic. - 'So I'll be back tomorrow.'
0:07:07 > 0:07:12Oh. So, we're not doing anything tonight, then?
0:07:12 > 0:07:14Well, we left it up in the air, didn't we?
0:07:16 > 0:07:17So, is that all right?
0:07:17 > 0:07:21Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, course.
0:07:22 > 0:07:25We'll do something tomorrow.
0:07:25 > 0:07:26Good.
0:07:32 > 0:07:35Can I just check your blood pressure, Mr Buttershaw?
0:07:35 > 0:07:38Hm? Oh, yes.
0:07:38 > 0:07:42- How are you feeling? - I'm very happy.
0:07:42 > 0:07:44I was watching you. You and your wife.
0:07:44 > 0:07:47You're just so completely in love with each other, aren't you?
0:07:47 > 0:07:49She's not my wife yet.
0:07:49 > 0:07:52But I do think we need to get on with it.
0:07:53 > 0:07:56We are popping up back to the hospital again, aren't we, Gillian?
0:07:56 > 0:07:59- This evening?- Absolutely. - I'd like to.
0:07:59 > 0:08:00Do you need me to come?
0:08:00 > 0:08:02Why? Have you got plans?
0:08:02 > 0:08:03Ellie.
0:08:03 > 0:08:06- Who?- Girlfriend. - She's not my girlfriend.
0:08:06 > 0:08:09PHONE VIBRATES She running rings round you again?
0:08:09 > 0:08:11- She's not like that. - What is she like?
0:08:11 > 0:08:13She does blow hot and cold.
0:08:13 > 0:08:17- Oh, you don't want that. Life's too short.- We're just mates.
0:08:17 > 0:08:19- She uses you. - She doesn't use me.
0:08:19 > 0:08:21- She damn well does!- Once.
0:08:21 > 0:08:22- What happened?- Nothing.
0:08:22 > 0:08:24- They had a date.- "Date."
0:08:24 > 0:08:27Only she stood him up cos she got a better offer.
0:08:27 > 0:08:29Yeah, nice(!) Bitch.
0:08:29 > 0:08:31- That ain't what happened.- Is.
0:08:31 > 0:08:33- How would you describe it? - PHONE RINGS
0:08:33 > 0:08:36Well, I'd be minding me own business.
0:08:36 > 0:08:38John? What's he want?
0:08:40 > 0:08:42- Hello?- 'Celia! Hi.'
0:08:42 > 0:08:44'What's up?'
0:08:44 > 0:08:47Just ringing to let you know that Caroline's just set off, just now.
0:08:47 > 0:08:49Right.
0:08:49 > 0:08:52Probably be with you in an hour, an hour and a half.
0:08:52 > 0:08:54- Right.- 'How is he?'
0:08:54 > 0:08:56Alan?
0:08:56 > 0:08:59'Well, it's early days, but he's conscious anyway.
0:08:59 > 0:09:00'Didn't she tell you?'
0:09:00 > 0:09:02Good. Yes! She did.
0:09:02 > 0:09:07Is...? Could I...? Is Gillian there?
0:09:07 > 0:09:11Gillian? Yes, she's here, and Raff and Robbie.
0:09:11 > 0:09:13- Could I...? Could I speak to her? - 'Gillian?'
0:09:13 > 0:09:15- Yes.- 'What for?'
0:09:15 > 0:09:17'Well, just...just...'
0:09:17 > 0:09:20It's John. He's asking to speak to you.
0:09:21 > 0:09:23What about?
0:09:25 > 0:09:27Hello?
0:09:27 > 0:09:28- Gillian.- 'Yes.'
0:09:28 > 0:09:30It's John.
0:09:30 > 0:09:32Yes.
0:09:32 > 0:09:34- Hi.- Yes?
0:09:34 > 0:09:38'Look... Sorry. I realise you're cross with me.'
0:09:38 > 0:09:39Am I?
0:09:39 > 0:09:41Yeah. Aren't you?
0:09:41 > 0:09:43'For getting drunk and making a fuss
0:09:43 > 0:09:45'and spilling the beans about Caroline to Celia and...'
0:09:45 > 0:09:46Oh!
0:09:46 > 0:09:48..so forth.
0:09:48 > 0:09:50Well, it's all water under t'bridge now, so...
0:09:50 > 0:09:51'Good. Good. Is it?'
0:09:51 > 0:09:53Gone and forgotten.
0:09:53 > 0:09:55Good. Good. Well, that's good.
0:09:55 > 0:09:57Bye, then.
0:09:57 > 0:09:59No. Wait.
0:09:59 > 0:10:01Then, there's the other thing.
0:10:01 > 0:10:04The other thing?
0:10:04 > 0:10:08'Could we...? I'd like to see you again.'
0:10:08 > 0:10:11Right. Well, that's... That's not...
0:10:11 > 0:10:15The thing is. Oh, God.
0:10:15 > 0:10:17Hello?
0:10:17 > 0:10:20I think I'm a little bit in love with you.
0:10:20 > 0:10:24Right. Right. OK.
0:10:24 > 0:10:31Well. That's...not exactly my problem as such, is it?
0:10:32 > 0:10:34You can't talk. Obviously.
0:10:34 > 0:10:36And there is that.
0:10:36 > 0:10:39'Maybe... Could we...meet up?
0:10:39 > 0:10:41- 'Somewhere? Sometime?'- No.
0:10:41 > 0:10:44I don't mind popping over.
0:10:44 > 0:10:47- Did you get my text message? - Please don't say no.
0:10:47 > 0:10:49I don't think I could...
0:10:49 > 0:10:52OK, so shall I give you back to Celia?
0:10:52 > 0:10:54'No. No. I don't need to speak to Celia again.'
0:10:54 > 0:10:56No, OK. Ta-ta, then.
0:10:56 > 0:10:58Gillian. Gillian. This is...
0:10:58 > 0:11:01My dad's in hospital, John.
0:11:01 > 0:11:04We've got a lot on just now at this end.
0:11:04 > 0:11:06Of course. Course you do.
0:11:06 > 0:11:08Sorry. Sure. It's just...
0:11:08 > 0:11:10'Boys all right?'
0:11:10 > 0:11:11Er...boys are fine.
0:11:11 > 0:11:13OK. Bye!
0:11:13 > 0:11:15Bye. Bye! Bye-bye.
0:11:26 > 0:11:30- Dad! What's for tea?- Nothing.
0:11:30 > 0:11:32I don't know.
0:11:46 > 0:11:50Hi, Judith. It's me. Are you doing anything this evening?
0:11:51 > 0:11:55He said I can come home on Monday, the doctor,
0:11:55 > 0:11:56all things being equal.
0:11:56 > 0:12:01That's...amazing.
0:12:01 > 0:12:03What else has he said?
0:12:03 > 0:12:06- Oh...a few dos and don'ts.- Like?
0:12:08 > 0:12:12- Usual.- No, come on.
0:12:12 > 0:12:15No enjoying yourself. No singing, no dancing,
0:12:15 > 0:12:17no fighting, no farting.
0:12:17 > 0:12:19THEY LAUGH Different pills?
0:12:19 > 0:12:21No, no. The same.
0:12:22 > 0:12:26He told me there'd been...
0:12:26 > 0:12:29damage to the muscle.
0:12:29 > 0:12:34Yeah. Well, it's...sorted itself out.
0:12:34 > 0:12:37I will be talking to the consultant myself again, Dad,
0:12:37 > 0:12:40in case you were thinking about trying to pull the wool over
0:12:40 > 0:12:42anyone's eyes with your medical rhetoric.
0:12:42 > 0:12:47Why don't you take Caroline and see if you can't find a cup of tea somewhere?
0:12:47 > 0:12:51Good plan. We'll see you in a bit, then.
0:12:55 > 0:12:58It is nice to see you.
0:12:58 > 0:13:00Yeah, it's nice to see you as well, love.
0:13:02 > 0:13:03They do cake.
0:13:10 > 0:13:12- I've been thinking. - Yeah, so have I.
0:13:12 > 0:13:16- Happen we should... - Just get on with it, the wedding.
0:13:16 > 0:13:18Great minds. Bugger the practicalities...
0:13:18 > 0:13:20Like where we might live. Let's just...
0:13:20 > 0:13:23Book a registrar and get on with it
0:13:23 > 0:13:25and worry about everything else afterwards.
0:13:25 > 0:13:28What do you think? What about a venue?
0:13:28 > 0:13:32- I don't know, I don't care. - Neither do I.
0:13:32 > 0:13:36We can get married in the car park at The Dog & Duck for all I care.
0:13:36 > 0:13:40And...not tell anyone till it's all over and done with.
0:13:40 > 0:13:41Anyone?
0:13:41 > 0:13:44Anyone.
0:13:44 > 0:13:47Well, that'll get round the best man issue very nicely.
0:13:47 > 0:13:49Won't we need witnesses?
0:13:49 > 0:13:52There'll be folk passing.
0:13:52 > 0:13:54It's appealing to me.
0:13:54 > 0:13:56Yes, I can see.
0:13:56 > 0:13:58What did the consultant say?
0:13:58 > 0:14:00Just what I've said.
0:14:00 > 0:14:03Why is it that trying to get information out of a man
0:14:03 > 0:14:06is like trying to get blood out of a stone?
0:14:06 > 0:14:08I'm A1.
0:14:08 > 0:14:10Oh, you're not A1, you've had a heart attack.
0:14:10 > 0:14:11(I'm A1.)
0:14:17 > 0:14:19I think I was more upset when I heard about Alan
0:14:19 > 0:14:22than I was when my dad died.
0:14:22 > 0:14:25God, that's an awful thing to say. Except he had dementia, my dad.
0:14:25 > 0:14:27- So in some ways...- Yeah. - ..it was...- Yeah.- ..a relief.
0:14:27 > 0:14:32Do you think people can die from a broken heart?
0:14:34 > 0:14:37I thought that was what was happening.
0:14:40 > 0:14:43Course I couldn't say that to t'consultant. He'd have laughed,
0:14:43 > 0:14:47or given you that look they do where they feel sorry for you,
0:14:47 > 0:14:48for being thick.
0:14:48 > 0:14:50You've probably never had that.
0:14:50 > 0:14:54- Well...- How's Kate?
0:14:54 > 0:14:56Yeah, she's... She's...
0:14:58 > 0:15:01- What?- It's all...
0:15:03 > 0:15:07Like everybody suddenly knows and I didn't want it to be like that.
0:15:07 > 0:15:10I mean, I don't think we know what we are yet exactly.
0:15:10 > 0:15:13And everybody's gawping at you like they're expecting you
0:15:13 > 0:15:17- to make an announcement.- Exactly that.- Sod 'em. Let 'em deal with it.
0:15:19 > 0:15:22Yeah. Yeah.
0:15:28 > 0:15:31I need to tell you this thing.
0:15:32 > 0:15:34OK.
0:15:36 > 0:15:39You'll probably think I'm a complete dipstick when I've told you,
0:15:39 > 0:15:42but I'd rather be upfront about it and then you know,
0:15:42 > 0:15:47and then we can either move forward or not.
0:15:47 > 0:15:51OK. So, first of all...
0:15:51 > 0:15:54I don't regret it. I don't regret anything,
0:15:54 > 0:15:56I make a point of not regretting things.
0:15:58 > 0:16:01- However...- You've slept with John.
0:16:05 > 0:16:07I was pissed.
0:16:07 > 0:16:10It was my birthday. I felt sorry for him,
0:16:10 > 0:16:13for being such a...twat, he looked so pathetic.
0:16:16 > 0:16:17Oh, you really have slept with John?
0:16:27 > 0:16:29What was it like?
0:16:32 > 0:16:33To be honest...
0:16:35 > 0:16:38..I don't actually remember very much about it,
0:16:38 > 0:16:39except that it happened.
0:16:41 > 0:16:42Right.
0:16:45 > 0:16:48Are you...hating me?
0:16:48 > 0:16:49No.
0:16:52 > 0:16:55I didn't want you to find out later from someone else and think there was
0:16:55 > 0:16:56any more to it than there was,
0:16:56 > 0:16:58because there wasn't, there really wasn't.
0:16:58 > 0:17:00It was one of those things you do and after you go,
0:17:00 > 0:17:03"God, why did I do that?!"
0:17:03 > 0:17:05And the truth is...
0:17:08 > 0:17:09..I was pissed.
0:17:11 > 0:17:13I don't even fancy him.
0:17:13 > 0:17:15I mean, you know, I don't mind him, but...
0:17:18 > 0:17:21Oh, I'm daring to hope that this isn't going down too badly
0:17:21 > 0:17:24judging by the expression on your face.
0:17:24 > 0:17:27- I'm pleased you told me. - It won't happen again.
0:17:27 > 0:17:29- No, no...you can have him. - I don't want him.
0:17:29 > 0:17:32- He's got a good income. - I don't care.
0:17:32 > 0:17:33CAROLINE LAUGHS
0:17:35 > 0:17:38- Do you hate me?- No.
0:17:38 > 0:17:41Are you laughing at me or with me?
0:17:41 > 0:17:47I don't know, I'm just...I'm... I don't know, just laughing.
0:17:47 > 0:17:52You're thinking, "Braindead, low-life, trailer trash," aren't you?
0:17:52 > 0:17:54Yeah.
0:17:54 > 0:17:55But that's cos I'm a snotty bitch.
0:18:00 > 0:18:03It's good that you're taking it so well.
0:18:03 > 0:18:08Maybe you're in shock. Maybe the implications haven't sunk in yet.
0:18:08 > 0:18:09Are there any?
0:18:09 > 0:18:11You're not pregnant, are you?
0:18:11 > 0:18:15No! That really would thicken the plot.
0:18:21 > 0:18:22So, um...
0:18:24 > 0:18:25..when was this?
0:18:27 > 0:18:30Night me dad and your mum drove back over to Harrogate.
0:18:30 > 0:18:34When he'd, you know, John had spilled the beans to her about you.
0:18:34 > 0:18:35Our birthday.
0:18:36 > 0:18:38God. Right.
0:18:40 > 0:18:44When I was propping Judith up in casualty.
0:18:44 > 0:18:46Were you?
0:18:46 > 0:18:47Blimey.
0:18:51 > 0:18:53"Are we cool, Vincent?"
0:18:57 > 0:18:58Is that from something?
0:18:58 > 0:18:59Pulp Fiction.
0:19:01 > 0:19:05I'm Samuel L Jackson and you're John Travolta.
0:19:07 > 0:19:08Right.
0:19:10 > 0:19:13Then we go out and shoot some students, I think.
0:19:13 > 0:19:15Unless I've misremembered.
0:19:18 > 0:19:20Blimey.
0:19:29 > 0:19:31I can't help thinking how different things would've
0:19:31 > 0:19:34- been now if he hadn't pulled through.- Oh, Celia!
0:19:34 > 0:19:38Well, you don't need to think about that now, do you?
0:19:38 > 0:19:40I think the world of you two.
0:19:40 > 0:19:42- You both know that, don't you? - Aww!
0:20:05 > 0:20:07I'll get t'kettle on.
0:20:07 > 0:20:12Where's little what's-his-name with the broken leg?
0:20:12 > 0:20:18Paul? I got shot of him. I took him to his granny's.
0:20:18 > 0:20:19Sit down, get warm.
0:20:24 > 0:20:26I might get back off home, Mum.
0:20:26 > 0:20:28Oh, I thought you were stopping.
0:20:28 > 0:20:31I've left John at home with the boys, which I'm not thrilled about.
0:20:31 > 0:20:34I don't want him to think I need him for anything, because I don't.
0:20:34 > 0:20:37He rang earlier, John. I don't know why.
0:20:37 > 0:20:41Oh, to say you'd set off. Seemed like an excuse.
0:20:41 > 0:20:44He asked to speak to Gillian. I don't know why.
0:20:44 > 0:20:46I've been thinking.
0:20:46 > 0:20:50How would you feel if, when he comes out of hospital,
0:20:50 > 0:20:53we came to live at my little flat?
0:20:53 > 0:20:56- I'd feel fine about it. - You see, the thing is,
0:20:56 > 0:21:00you know my dad died of a heart attack, climbing the stairs.
0:21:00 > 0:21:02The doctor told him not to and my mother, of course, said,
0:21:02 > 0:21:06"Oh, you'll be all right," and that was it.
0:21:06 > 0:21:08He'd not want to contradict her.
0:21:10 > 0:21:12He went as white as a sheet.
0:21:12 > 0:21:17Mum, it's your home. It's absolutely fine by me.
0:21:17 > 0:21:19What does Gillian think?
0:21:19 > 0:21:23See, I've no stairs, and it's nothing but stairs here,
0:21:23 > 0:21:25and steep ones at that.
0:21:25 > 0:21:27OK.
0:21:27 > 0:21:30I've not broached him with it yet, never mind Gillian.
0:21:30 > 0:21:34- He might have other ideas.- OK.
0:21:34 > 0:21:36Right.
0:21:37 > 0:21:39Is everybody warm enough?
0:21:39 > 0:21:43I'm going to...get, er...going.
0:21:43 > 0:21:44OK.
0:21:44 > 0:21:48I've a pile of paperwork to get through and...
0:21:48 > 0:21:50Ring me if you want anything.
0:21:50 > 0:21:54- I'll see you...- I'll see you out... Sure.
0:21:56 > 0:21:58- See you.- See ya.
0:22:04 > 0:22:07- Are you all right?- Yeah.
0:22:08 > 0:22:13Is there something up between you and Gillian?
0:22:17 > 0:22:20She slept with John.
0:22:21 > 0:22:26She just told me. That night, my birthday, her birthday,
0:22:26 > 0:22:29when he was over here shooting his mouth off.
0:22:30 > 0:22:34You and Alan set off over to Harrogate, I was propping
0:22:34 > 0:22:39Judith up in casualty and they ended up in bed together.
0:22:39 > 0:22:41I mean, she's told me cos she feels bad about it
0:22:41 > 0:22:44and she was drunk and she wishes it hadn't happened, but...
0:22:46 > 0:22:50I don't know. How do people do that?
0:22:50 > 0:22:54Why is everything so casual and meaningless and...?
0:22:54 > 0:22:56I can't leave. I need to be near him.
0:22:56 > 0:22:59No, I didn't...
0:22:59 > 0:23:02I know that, I don't expect you to.
0:23:02 > 0:23:05I was... Sorry, I just think I'm a little bit shocked, that's all.
0:23:05 > 0:23:07- Don't say anything.- No.
0:23:10 > 0:23:13Do you think before Judith, John was...?
0:23:13 > 0:23:15At it with all and sundry?
0:23:16 > 0:23:18Like your dad?
0:23:19 > 0:23:21I don't know, love.
0:23:26 > 0:23:27- Ring me.- Yes.
0:23:29 > 0:23:31Don't say anything.
0:23:31 > 0:23:33No, don't worry.
0:24:03 > 0:24:04- Everything all right?- Hmm.
0:24:06 > 0:24:10- I thought I might turn in early, if it's all right?- Sure.
0:24:10 > 0:24:13Course. You... do what you need to do.
0:24:13 > 0:24:14- That for me?- Yeah.
0:24:16 > 0:24:18Is it all right if I...?
0:24:18 > 0:24:20Course.
0:24:26 > 0:24:27Night-night, love.
0:24:27 > 0:24:29Night-night.
0:25:08 > 0:25:10Ready, Mr Buttershaw?
0:25:10 > 0:25:14I've been ready since six o'clock this morning.
0:25:14 > 0:25:18Have you heck?! Not sat there, in your coat.
0:25:18 > 0:25:21Still, wouldn't be the first time you'd kept me waiting.
0:25:21 > 0:25:23THEY CHUCKLE
0:25:23 > 0:25:29- You're never going to let that drop, are you?- I might do one day,
0:25:29 > 0:25:30if you play your cards right.
0:25:58 > 0:26:02I resolved, the first time it happened, that I was going to live
0:26:02 > 0:26:05life differently and I did, on the whole.
0:26:05 > 0:26:10I got in touch with you, didn't I, for instance? But now...
0:26:11 > 0:26:16- Now you're going to take things steady.- No. God, no.
0:26:16 > 0:26:19Now I'm going to really start living.
0:26:19 > 0:26:22What do you think I'm doing sat up here?
0:26:22 > 0:26:26- Well, you know what the consultant just said.- Oh, bugger that.
0:26:28 > 0:26:31OK. So what've you got planned?
0:26:31 > 0:26:35- Anything. All sorts.- Such as?
0:26:35 > 0:26:40- Have you ever fancied skiing? - No. Have you?
0:26:42 > 0:26:44- HE LAUGHS - Oh, you!
0:26:44 > 0:26:47- Never!- Good.
0:26:47 > 0:26:49Well, that's that dealt with, then.
0:26:49 > 0:26:53We used to come up here on bikes.
0:26:53 > 0:26:57Me and Maurice and Harry and Joe Riley.
0:26:57 > 0:27:00You could get all t'way to Greetland from top o' Barkisland
0:27:00 > 0:27:02without pedalling once.
0:27:02 > 0:27:07- I know you could because...- It were like floating through the air.
0:27:07 > 0:27:10Because me and Eileen and Doreen Wilkinson
0:27:10 > 0:27:15- and our Muriel used to do just the same.- Did you?- Yeah, yeah.
0:27:15 > 0:27:19I always used to think you were a bit smitten with Joe Riley.
0:27:19 > 0:27:20Joe?!
0:27:20 > 0:27:24No. Although he was very good-looking.
0:27:24 > 0:27:28I always thought he had a look of Errol Flynn, but clever.
0:27:28 > 0:27:31- He went to work for NASA, didn't he? - He did!
0:27:31 > 0:27:34He were made a Fellow of the Royal Society, then off he went
0:27:34 > 0:27:41to Altadena, California. Brain drain. He were my best man...
0:27:41 > 0:27:45- when Eileen and I got wed. - Oh. Do you keep in touch?
0:27:45 > 0:27:52We did. Every Christmas, and the occasional letter in-between.
0:27:52 > 0:27:53He popped over once or twice
0:27:53 > 0:27:57to see his mother, but we always caught up.
0:27:57 > 0:28:01I always fancied popping over there, but it never happened.
0:28:03 > 0:28:05He had Parkinson's at finish.
0:28:09 > 0:28:12We came up here to scatter my dad's ashes,
0:28:12 > 0:28:14me and me mum.
0:28:14 > 0:28:19We drove over from Sheffield and we had Caroline in the pushchair.
0:28:19 > 0:28:201969.
0:28:23 > 0:28:26He loved up here, me dad.
0:28:26 > 0:28:28It was a right farce.
0:28:28 > 0:28:31We thought it would be like powder,
0:28:31 > 0:28:33but it wasn't, it was more like grit,
0:28:33 > 0:28:37granules, and it got everywhere.
0:28:37 > 0:28:41We just couldn't get rid of it. Him.
0:28:41 > 0:28:45We hadn't thought it through. Well, she hadn't, me mother.
0:28:45 > 0:28:51And we hadn't got permission. Well, we didn't know you needed it.
0:28:51 > 0:28:53Perhaps you didn't then. I don't know.
0:28:55 > 0:28:59I don't know what my mum and dad would've thought about me and you.
0:29:01 > 0:29:04Actually, I do. They'd have been over the moon.
0:29:04 > 0:29:07They'd have been thrilled to bits with you.
0:29:09 > 0:29:11Do you fancy a pint?
0:29:14 > 0:29:16It's only just gone half-past 11!
0:29:16 > 0:29:18You've only been out of hospital half an hour!
0:29:18 > 0:29:21- So what?- You know damn well so what.
0:29:21 > 0:29:27Do you fancy popping over to the Registry Office first, then?
0:29:27 > 0:29:32Are we serious, about not telling anyone
0:29:32 > 0:29:36- till it's all over and done with? - Well, I am, yeah.
0:30:15 > 0:30:19So that's a fortnight tomorrow at 11am.
0:30:21 > 0:30:23Shall I put that on a card for you?
0:30:54 > 0:30:56Well, it's a good job you texted me
0:30:56 > 0:30:59or I'd have been wondering where you were.
0:30:59 > 0:31:04Is it wise to go gallivanting when you've only just been discharged?
0:31:04 > 0:31:08I just wanted to see Ladstone Rock and then we fancied a pint.
0:31:08 > 0:31:13- Oh, so you went via Aberdeen? - That's right.
0:31:13 > 0:31:16- Have you set a date?- Sorry? - For the wedding?
0:31:16 > 0:31:20Oh, no, love. No.
0:31:20 > 0:31:23Alan needs to concentrate on getting fit again first
0:31:23 > 0:31:26before we start thinking of anything like that.
0:31:26 > 0:31:27Shall we get t'kettle on?
0:31:27 > 0:31:31And then me and Celia have got something to run past you.
0:31:36 > 0:31:39- Harrogate?- I've no stairs.
0:31:39 > 0:31:43And you're out on the farm all day, or down at the shop,
0:31:43 > 0:31:45whereas I can see to him 24/7.
0:31:45 > 0:31:46That's what I'm thinking.
0:31:48 > 0:31:50Well, that's very kind of you, but...
0:31:50 > 0:31:52And it's not like it's for ever.
0:31:52 > 0:31:56I mean, we do intend to buy. Eventually.
0:31:56 > 0:31:59- OK.- And soon.
0:31:59 > 0:32:02And when we do, it'll more than likely be round here.
0:32:02 > 0:32:04Well, we've not discussed that yet.
0:32:04 > 0:32:05No, no, but...
0:32:05 > 0:32:10And it's not a million miles away, Harrogate, is it?
0:32:10 > 0:32:11No, it's not but...
0:32:11 > 0:32:16And you'd be more than welcome, any time you fancied, to pop over.
0:32:16 > 0:32:19It is very nice, the house
0:32:19 > 0:32:20and Celia's little flat.
0:32:20 > 0:32:23I'm sure it is, Dad. I just...
0:32:26 > 0:32:29So when were you thinking of...
0:32:29 > 0:32:31Tomorrow.
0:32:31 > 0:32:35Tomorrow? Does Caroline know...?
0:32:35 > 0:32:37She's fine about it.
0:32:37 > 0:32:39I see.
0:32:40 > 0:32:43So...
0:32:43 > 0:32:46Well, it just seems a bit sudden.
0:32:47 > 0:32:49But... Well,
0:32:49 > 0:32:50yeah, if it's what you want.
0:32:50 > 0:32:53I thought it'd be a weight off your mind.
0:32:53 > 0:32:55You'll be 60 miles away.
0:32:55 > 0:32:58Oh, no. It's actually more like 40.
0:32:58 > 0:33:0040, 60.
0:33:00 > 0:33:03He'll be in good hands.
0:33:03 > 0:33:04Yeah, I understand that, Celia.
0:33:04 > 0:33:09You'll have to pretend I'm on holiday.
0:33:09 > 0:33:11Right.
0:33:11 > 0:33:13But...
0:33:13 > 0:33:16how about if I popped over with you?
0:33:16 > 0:33:20- Just quickly, just tomorrow, just to make sure you're...- Yeah.
0:33:20 > 0:33:22..settled in all right and everything's...
0:33:22 > 0:33:24Sure.
0:33:24 > 0:33:29Right. I'll get the kettle on.
0:33:34 > 0:33:40I've got my new hat. So that's that bit covered.
0:33:40 > 0:33:43Something old, something new...
0:33:43 > 0:33:45Something old we've not got.
0:33:45 > 0:33:47Well, we're both old.
0:33:47 > 0:33:50- Are we?- Well, you are, I'm not.
0:33:50 > 0:33:52THEY CHUCKLE
0:33:52 > 0:33:56I started counting backwards when I got to 36.
0:33:56 > 0:34:00So how old does that make you now then?
0:34:00 > 0:34:01Minus three.
0:34:01 > 0:34:03Fancy.
0:34:03 > 0:34:07We had a very interesting experience in 1988,
0:34:07 > 0:34:11when me and our Caroline were both 22.
0:34:11 > 0:34:14That must have taken some explaining.
0:34:14 > 0:34:16Not really.
0:34:16 > 0:34:19Something borrowed...
0:34:19 > 0:34:26I could borrow a bow tie off Maurice. Then I'd be very dapper.
0:34:26 > 0:34:29You could and you would, but then he'd want to know why you were
0:34:29 > 0:34:31borrowing it. You know what a nosy old bugger he is.
0:34:31 > 0:34:34I could lie. I could say I'd been invited to a cocktail party.
0:34:34 > 0:34:36In Manhattan.
0:34:36 > 0:34:38Mmm, he'd believe that.
0:34:38 > 0:34:40Only he might want to come with me.
0:34:40 > 0:34:44- Tell him to sod off.- OK.
0:34:44 > 0:34:46Something blue.
0:34:46 > 0:34:49A mucky magazine?
0:34:49 > 0:34:51Have you got any?
0:34:51 > 0:34:53No. Have you?
0:34:53 > 0:34:56Oh, yeah, got loads(!)
0:34:56 > 0:35:00THEY LAUGH
0:35:00 > 0:35:02No, I haven't.
0:35:03 > 0:35:05CELIA AND ALAN LAUGH UPSTAIRS
0:35:54 > 0:35:55She slept with John.
0:35:56 > 0:35:59- Who?- Gillian.
0:35:59 > 0:36:01That night when we drove over here,
0:36:01 > 0:36:05and he'd been there shooting his mouth off about Caroline
0:36:05 > 0:36:06batting for the other side...
0:36:06 > 0:36:08Slept with him?!
0:36:08 > 0:36:10Had...sex with him.
0:36:12 > 0:36:13How do you know?
0:36:13 > 0:36:15Caroline told me.
0:36:15 > 0:36:16Well, how does she know?
0:36:16 > 0:36:19Gillian. Told her, apparently.
0:36:19 > 0:36:21What for?
0:36:21 > 0:36:26Well, because... I don't know. I think because she regretted it.
0:36:28 > 0:36:33I don't know why I've told you. Well, except it's bothered me.
0:36:34 > 0:36:37Sorry. I don't want to burden you with it.
0:36:37 > 0:36:40It's not... I'm not...
0:36:40 > 0:36:44I'm just a bit befuddled with it myself really.
0:36:44 > 0:36:49And plus, I don't want to see her get hurt. Gillian.
0:36:49 > 0:36:54God! He's a bugger is John.
0:36:59 > 0:37:04- Gillian's coming!- Gillian?- Yes!
0:37:04 > 0:37:06And Kate's here.
0:37:06 > 0:37:09What's...? What's Gillian coming here for?
0:37:09 > 0:37:13- Would you like some tea? - Ooh. Hi, John.
0:37:13 > 0:37:15What's Gillian coming here for?
0:37:15 > 0:37:20Alan's moving into my mum's to recuperate and I think she wants to see him settled in.
0:37:20 > 0:37:23So, is...is she staying...long?
0:37:23 > 0:37:25I don't know. You'll have to ask her yourself.
0:37:25 > 0:37:28Oh, and Kate's moving in.
0:37:28 > 0:37:30I'll get my things out of the car.
0:37:30 > 0:37:33Lawrence, can you help Kate with her things?
0:37:33 > 0:37:35That's... You can't expect me...
0:37:35 > 0:37:38She's got her own house, what does she want to move in here for?
0:37:38 > 0:37:41John, after I came back here on Saturday night
0:37:41 > 0:37:44and found what I found, I'm amazed you could begin to imagine that
0:37:44 > 0:37:47you have anything to say at all about what other people do.
0:37:47 > 0:37:49- Judith...- Judith needs help.
0:37:49 > 0:37:52- Judith and I are not an item. - Well, you could've fooled me!
0:37:52 > 0:37:57I will not be made to feel like a sodding gooseberry in my own house.
0:37:57 > 0:38:00- That-that-that was... - You have nothing to say.
0:38:05 > 0:38:06What time are they getting here?
0:38:22 > 0:38:23Blimey.
0:38:23 > 0:38:27My little apartment's round the back, Gillian.
0:38:29 > 0:38:32Done all right for yourself here, Dad, eh?
0:38:34 > 0:38:35What's up?
0:38:35 > 0:38:39I thought we were plumbing depths with Susan Jatri's lad, but John?
0:38:39 > 0:38:42He's practically your brother-in-law.
0:38:42 > 0:38:45And I thought you told me you and Robbie were more or less an item?
0:38:45 > 0:38:46How did...? Who...?
0:38:46 > 0:38:49Celia told me. Caroline told her.
0:38:49 > 0:38:52- You...- I told Caroline because I felt bad about it.
0:38:52 > 0:38:57I was pissed, it was my birthday. Me and Robbie are...
0:38:57 > 0:38:59- Are we going in?- Yeah, let me.
0:38:59 > 0:39:01I'll lead the way.
0:39:03 > 0:39:07It didn't mean anything. It was rubbish, it was ridiculous.
0:39:07 > 0:39:09I just felt sorry for him.
0:39:11 > 0:39:13You're a...
0:39:13 > 0:39:15What am I? Come on! Don't hold back!
0:39:17 > 0:39:19..a pillock!
0:39:19 > 0:39:23- Oh, OK. I thought you were going to say something worse.- I was.
0:39:23 > 0:39:24Yeah! Whatever.
0:39:26 > 0:39:29I've put my things in your bedroom.
0:39:29 > 0:39:32- Is that...?- Of course it is.
0:39:32 > 0:39:33How permanent is this?
0:39:35 > 0:39:38We need to sit down and have the conversation properly,
0:39:38 > 0:39:43and not when we've been rushed into it, but it's... Yeah. If...
0:39:43 > 0:39:49If... Yeah. If it's what you want.
0:39:49 > 0:39:51Do you need to ask?
0:39:52 > 0:39:55PHONE RINGS
0:39:55 > 0:39:59- Hello? - 'We're back, we've arrived.'
0:39:59 > 0:40:03Good! They've arrived. I'll pop round.
0:40:03 > 0:40:05There's something I need to tell you.
0:40:05 > 0:40:06'Right. Ta-ta.'
0:40:06 > 0:40:09She's popping round.
0:40:12 > 0:40:13What's up?
0:40:15 > 0:40:18It's just a disappointment, isn't it?
0:40:18 > 0:40:20An ongoing disappointment.
0:40:20 > 0:40:24And for the record, he is not my brother-in-law because, A,
0:40:24 > 0:40:29you're not married yet, and two - him and Caroline are getting divorced.
0:40:29 > 0:40:33Ipso-facto, QED, NOT my brother-in-law.
0:40:33 > 0:40:35I said not to say anything.
0:40:35 > 0:40:37Aye. Well, I did.
0:40:37 > 0:40:41Can we all just get it into our little heads that I regret it
0:40:41 > 0:40:45and it won't happen again? Would you like that written down?
0:40:45 > 0:40:47In triplicate?
0:40:47 > 0:40:50What for? It wouldn't mean owt.
0:40:52 > 0:40:54Dad, I'm going to get upset.
0:40:54 > 0:40:56Well, what do you expect?
0:40:56 > 0:40:59She were pregnant when she were 15.
0:41:02 > 0:41:06- Dad!- Broke Eileen's heart. Perhaps you didn't know that.
0:41:06 > 0:41:08KNOCK ON DOOR
0:41:08 > 0:41:12Hi! Alan!
0:41:12 > 0:41:15- Hello, love. - How was your journey?
0:41:18 > 0:41:24- It was fine. - Good! Is everything...?
0:41:25 > 0:41:28- I'll put the kettle on in a minute. - I'm cooking for everyone.
0:41:28 > 0:41:30It'll be about half an hour if that's...
0:41:30 > 0:41:32- Perfect, love. - Smashing.
0:41:34 > 0:41:39So, I just need to...tell you something.
0:41:39 > 0:41:42Kate's here. You're going to have to bear with me. I didn't plan this
0:41:42 > 0:41:46exactly to coincide... Only, when I got back here
0:41:46 > 0:41:47on Saturday night, Judith was here.
0:41:56 > 0:41:58Ahh!
0:41:58 > 0:42:00Oh!
0:42:00 > 0:42:04Oh, Jesus!
0:42:04 > 0:42:11Shit! I thought... He said you were in... Where is it? Huddersfield.
0:42:11 > 0:42:14Halifax.
0:42:14 > 0:42:17What's the matter? What's happened?
0:42:17 > 0:42:20You've not fallen down the stairs again have you, you silly cow?
0:42:20 > 0:42:24- Caroline's here.- What? - Caroline's here!- What?
0:42:24 > 0:42:26- CAROLINE'S... - Caroline's in Halifax.
0:42:26 > 0:42:28Where are the boys?
0:42:28 > 0:42:32They're around. What are you doing here? You're supposed to be...
0:42:32 > 0:42:34They've been playing music really loud and making loads of noise,
0:42:34 > 0:42:39and they were throwing stuff around in the kitchen and then they went upstairs in your bedroom!
0:42:39 > 0:42:43- That kid needs to lighten up. - We thought you were going to be away all night.
0:42:43 > 0:42:46Oh, God, don't snivel! It's hardly that...bad.
0:42:46 > 0:42:48Get your coats on, get into my car.
0:42:48 > 0:42:51I'll be back in the morning and I don't care how you do it,
0:42:51 > 0:42:53but that kitchen better be as spotless as it was
0:42:53 > 0:42:56when I left here this afternoon.
0:42:56 > 0:42:58Oi, you have friends round,
0:42:58 > 0:43:00I have friends round.
0:43:00 > 0:43:02You've traumatised our children.
0:43:02 > 0:43:06I have? What about you? You've scarred them for life!
0:43:06 > 0:43:09Do you know what? I'm actually starting to feel a bit queasy.
0:43:09 > 0:43:12This is nothing compared to what you're actively
0:43:12 > 0:43:15inflicting on them, you mad old dyke!
0:43:15 > 0:43:18And bollocks to you with your "this kitchen better be spotless".
0:43:18 > 0:43:21I don't know why I'm bothering to remind you, but I will.
0:43:21 > 0:43:26This house... This house was paid for almost entirely with money
0:43:26 > 0:43:29I earned when I was on the bestseller list! So f...
0:43:29 > 0:43:31JUDITH VOMITS
0:43:33 > 0:43:36- I'll see you in the morning.- Yeah.
0:43:36 > 0:43:38Whatever.
0:43:38 > 0:43:42So, I took the boys round to Kate's for the night
0:43:42 > 0:43:46and, um...John was pretty appalled, to be fair to him,
0:43:46 > 0:43:48on Sunday morning.
0:43:48 > 0:43:50He had tried to tidy the kitchen up,
0:43:50 > 0:43:52but he wasn't really in any fit state to stand up
0:43:52 > 0:43:56for any length of time until the early evening, so I had to help him.
0:43:56 > 0:44:00Then I asked him if he would move out,
0:44:00 > 0:44:02so that we can all move on with our lives,
0:44:02 > 0:44:04but he's still refusing to do that.
0:44:04 > 0:44:06So I have asked Kate to move in
0:44:06 > 0:44:10in the hope that, at some point, he will get the message.
0:44:10 > 0:44:14So that's why Kate's here, OK?
0:44:23 > 0:44:26- Where's Caroline?- Next door.
0:44:28 > 0:44:32Is...Gillian staying for supper?
0:44:32 > 0:44:33I don't know.
0:44:36 > 0:44:38What are you...cooking?
0:44:38 > 0:44:42It's... Erm...I don't know. Caroline's in charge, I'm just...
0:44:42 > 0:44:44- What's she doing next door?- I...
0:44:44 > 0:44:49God, I can't stand this! This is my house, I live here.
0:44:51 > 0:44:54- Is she...? She'd better not be. - What?
0:44:54 > 0:44:57Telling people things about me.
0:44:57 > 0:45:00I'm not going to be made to feel like...
0:45:00 > 0:45:03whatever in my own house.
0:45:03 > 0:45:06I...have no opinion on that.
0:45:11 > 0:45:14He's a mess is John.
0:45:14 > 0:45:17As long as nobody's under any illusions.
0:45:19 > 0:45:23Caroline, I'm going to get off home.
0:45:23 > 0:45:24OK.
0:45:27 > 0:45:29Ring me if you want anything.
0:45:29 > 0:45:31Right.
0:45:31 > 0:45:34Right. Thanks, Celia.
0:45:35 > 0:45:36OK, love.
0:45:43 > 0:45:45I'll...
0:45:52 > 0:45:56- Gillian? - Sorry, I need to get home.
0:45:58 > 0:46:03- What's the matter?- Nothing. - Come inside.- No. No, I'll...
0:46:03 > 0:46:05Well... What's happened?
0:46:05 > 0:46:08It's fine. It's fine. I'm just leaving him here,
0:46:08 > 0:46:1160, 40 miles from home and...
0:46:11 > 0:46:14- She'll look after him. - I know that.
0:46:14 > 0:46:18- And I'll keep an eye on everything. - I know. I know you will.
0:46:18 > 0:46:21- You can come here any time you like. - I know. I know.
0:46:21 > 0:46:23Why did you tell your mum?
0:46:26 > 0:46:28Is that what's...?
0:46:28 > 0:46:32- She's told me dad and he's... - Did she? I'm sorry, I just...
0:46:34 > 0:46:40I just couldn't... Just couldn't...
0:46:40 > 0:46:44No, don't. It's all my own stupid fault anyway, isn't it?
0:46:44 > 0:46:46Is he upset?
0:46:47 > 0:46:50Oh, God. I'm sorry.
0:46:50 > 0:46:51No, it's...
0:46:54 > 0:46:57He said something about me mum.
0:46:57 > 0:46:58That's all.
0:47:00 > 0:47:02I broke her heart apparently.
0:47:03 > 0:47:04When I was 15.
0:47:06 > 0:47:09Well, I did. I know I did.
0:47:09 > 0:47:10I got pregnant.
0:47:10 > 0:47:14I had to leave school at the time. You know, I went back...
0:47:14 > 0:47:18later to do my A-levels, but...it never worked out, so...
0:47:20 > 0:47:24All very disappointing for them.
0:47:24 > 0:47:26So, yup, that's me.
0:47:27 > 0:47:29You had a baby?
0:47:29 > 0:47:32No! No. A-Abortion.
0:47:33 > 0:47:37Sorry. I am sorry. I don't know why I told her, I just...
0:47:37 > 0:47:41had it on my brain and, you know, she's me mum, and...
0:47:41 > 0:47:44- Well, it'll blow over. - Yeah. Will it?
0:47:44 > 0:47:47- Just bad timing. With his... - Yeah. Sorry.
0:47:49 > 0:47:51- I'll get off.- I'll ring you.
0:47:51 > 0:47:54- I wasn't accusing you. I just... - I'm sorry.
0:47:54 > 0:47:56Not your fault. Really not.
0:48:03 > 0:48:05Why am I apologising?
0:48:09 > 0:48:11Sanctimonious b...
0:48:38 > 0:48:42- Gillian!- Shit!
0:48:42 > 0:48:43I need to talk to you.
0:48:43 > 0:48:45Yeah, well, I don't need to talk to you!
0:48:45 > 0:48:50- In fact, right now... - I can't...- ..you're the last...
0:48:50 > 0:48:52You can't treat people like this.
0:48:52 > 0:48:56You can't ignore my texts and hang up on me on the phone.
0:48:56 > 0:48:59- Can you get out of my Land Rover, please?- We had sex.
0:48:59 > 0:49:02Yes, we did. And, boy, am I paying for it now?!
0:49:02 > 0:49:05- You came onto me.- Not!- So forgive me... Yes, you did.- You...
0:49:05 > 0:49:09I tentatively explained that I had feelings for you.
0:49:09 > 0:49:11You said, "Shall we go upstairs?" So forgive me for thinking that
0:49:11 > 0:49:14- we'd embarked upon some sort of relationship.- OK. Right. Right.
0:49:14 > 0:49:17So, please, can you explain why, Saturday afternoon,
0:49:17 > 0:49:18you're on the phone saying,
0:49:18 > 0:49:22"I think I might be a little bit in love with you, Gillian," and then,
0:49:22 > 0:49:26the same night, you're here, in bed with Judith apparently,
0:49:26 > 0:49:29who you claim to hate.
0:49:29 > 0:49:32- She told you. Caroline. She... - Yes!- Well, isn't it obvious?
0:49:32 > 0:49:34- Not to me! - I'm floundering.
0:49:34 > 0:49:38- What?- You won't speak to me, she's decided she's a dyke,
0:49:38 > 0:49:39the boys think I'm ridiculous.
0:49:39 > 0:49:43Oh, no. They don't. Do they?
0:49:43 > 0:49:46I've got nothing. She's moved her insipid little girlfriend in
0:49:46 > 0:49:48- and her mad mother... - Oi, steady on.
0:49:48 > 0:49:54I bought that house and now I'm the one who... Oh, shit!
0:49:54 > 0:49:56I'm going to have to knock to get back in.
0:49:56 > 0:49:58SHE GIGGLES Aw-w! Bless.
0:49:58 > 0:50:01Yeah, it's all so funny, isn't it?
0:50:01 > 0:50:02Sorry. SHE LAUGHS
0:50:02 > 0:50:06I'm all over the place, I can't think straight, and then... God!
0:50:06 > 0:50:10I end up in another tawdry mess with that ridiculous woman in front of the children.
0:50:10 > 0:50:14You know, people commit suicide with less than this eating away inside their brain.
0:50:14 > 0:50:16Is it...that bad?
0:50:16 > 0:50:18My publisher's dropped me.
0:50:20 > 0:50:21Why?
0:50:23 > 0:50:27It's being brewing for a while. I got an e-mail last week.
0:50:30 > 0:50:35Well...is there someone you can talk to about it?
0:50:35 > 0:50:38No, not really. It's not something you want to tell to just anyone.
0:50:38 > 0:50:41And my agent...he's not returned my calls, so that's...
0:50:41 > 0:50:43You see, before, Caroline would've been really...
0:50:43 > 0:50:45good about something like that.
0:50:45 > 0:50:47She'd have put it in a context.
0:50:47 > 0:50:50She'd have thrown a light on it that...
0:50:50 > 0:50:53She can be a really good person to have in your corner.
0:50:53 > 0:50:56Yeah, well, shame you were unfaithful to her.
0:50:57 > 0:50:58Sorry.
0:50:58 > 0:51:01Everything's just such a mess.
0:51:02 > 0:51:06What did you mean when you said, "And, boy, am I paying for it now"?
0:51:07 > 0:51:11Well... OK. They all know.
0:51:11 > 0:51:14- That we...- Do they?
0:51:16 > 0:51:21Do they? Well, is that...
0:51:21 > 0:51:24such a bad thing? Couldn't we...?
0:51:24 > 0:51:30No. It was a mistake, it should never have happened.
0:51:30 > 0:51:32I have to go, John.
0:51:32 > 0:51:35I'm sorry about your publisher
0:51:35 > 0:51:38but, you know, we've all got crosses to bear.
0:51:38 > 0:51:41I don't know how much longer I can afford to keep the farm going,
0:51:41 > 0:51:43- way things are at the moment.- Why?
0:51:43 > 0:51:46- Oh...money.- Really?
0:51:46 > 0:51:47That's my problem.
0:51:48 > 0:51:51So...what if I...popped over
0:51:51 > 0:51:53some time? Would that be...
0:51:53 > 0:51:55completely...?
0:51:55 > 0:51:58I'm seeing Robbie.
0:51:58 > 0:51:59I thought you hated Robbie.
0:51:59 > 0:52:01Yeah, I thought you hated Judith.
0:52:13 > 0:52:15HE KNOCKS ON WINDOW
0:52:28 > 0:52:32- What are you doing outside? - I... Does it matter?
0:52:38 > 0:52:40Do you want something to eat?
0:52:40 > 0:52:43- Is there enough? - You'll have to find a chair.
0:53:00 > 0:53:02Hello.
0:53:02 > 0:53:04Hi, Alan. How's...? Are you...?
0:53:04 > 0:53:07Oh, fighting fit.
0:53:07 > 0:53:10Good. That's good. That's...
0:53:10 > 0:53:12Would you like...?
0:53:12 > 0:53:14Well, perhaps just a small one.
0:53:18 > 0:53:19I'll get you a glass.
0:53:37 > 0:53:38Come by!
0:53:40 > 0:53:41Away! Away!
0:53:48 > 0:53:49SHE WHISTLES
0:53:55 > 0:53:57Can you sit down, please?
0:53:58 > 0:54:01On you go. Come on.
0:54:01 > 0:54:02BELL RINGS
0:54:07 > 0:54:09STUDENTS SING
0:54:16 > 0:54:17In you go.
0:54:44 > 0:54:46- PHONE VIBRATES - Oh, sorry.
0:54:48 > 0:54:49Oh, I've got to take this.
0:54:55 > 0:54:57- Hello, Gillian. - 'You busy?'
0:54:57 > 0:54:59I'm in a meeting.
0:54:59 > 0:55:02All right. Well, I'm sorry, but this might be urgent.
0:55:02 > 0:55:04Why?
0:55:04 > 0:55:05Where's me dad and Celia?
0:55:05 > 0:55:09Well, erm...at home as far as I know.
0:55:09 > 0:55:11They... So, you've...
0:55:12 > 0:55:15So no-one's been...
0:55:15 > 0:55:20I've found a card, behind a cushion,
0:55:20 > 0:55:25'on our settee. It's from Calderdale Registry Office.
0:55:25 > 0:55:27'An appointment card. They've got an appointment'
0:55:27 > 0:55:31to get married at...11 o'clock this morning.
0:55:31 > 0:55:32You're kidding!
0:55:32 > 0:55:34Have they...?
0:55:34 > 0:55:36Have they not said anything to you?
0:55:36 > 0:55:38'No.'
0:55:38 > 0:55:39Er...no.
0:55:39 > 0:55:43I've tried his mobile, I've tried hers.
0:55:43 > 0:55:45I can be there if you can.
0:55:45 > 0:55:49I'll probably overtake them on the M62. The little buggers!
0:55:49 > 0:55:53But...presumably, they don't want us there
0:55:53 > 0:55:56and, presumably, that's the point.
0:55:56 > 0:55:59'Has he not said anything to you at all?'
0:56:01 > 0:56:03I've spoken to him twice on the phone...
0:56:03 > 0:56:07'in the last two weeks since he came to live at yours,
0:56:07 > 0:56:09'all of it very perfunctory.'
0:56:09 > 0:56:13Not exactly flavour of the month at the moment, am I?
0:56:13 > 0:56:14'What, still?'
0:56:16 > 0:56:19'It's just a bit much, isn't it?'
0:56:19 > 0:56:22Our parents are getting married and they don't even want us there.
0:56:22 > 0:56:25Perhaps they don't want a fuss.
0:56:25 > 0:56:27SHE SCOFFS
0:56:27 > 0:56:29Gillian, I'm going to have to go. I'm chairing a meeting.
0:56:29 > 0:56:32- Right.- Sorry, is that all right? Can I ring you...?
0:56:32 > 0:56:33(Bi...)
0:57:09 > 0:57:11Shall we get married and not tell anyone?
0:57:11 > 0:57:14- 'You doing anything this weekend?' - What did you have in mind?- All sorts.
0:57:14 > 0:57:18- I want a baby. - SHE LAUGHS
0:57:18 > 0:57:20No.
0:57:20 > 0:57:23No, Caroline, I'm serious.
0:57:23 > 0:57:25Just keep pushing, love! keep pushing.
0:57:25 > 0:57:28- Keep squeezing Grandad's hand. - He's not me grandad!
0:57:28 > 0:57:32We'd have never carried on like that at that age, would we?
0:57:32 > 0:57:34Don't go, Dad.
0:57:34 > 0:57:38I don't know how you could fashion talking to your dad like this,
0:57:38 > 0:57:41when you know how poorly he's been.
0:57:41 > 0:57:42Pow.
0:57:50 > 0:57:52Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd