0:00:02 > 0:00:04- Glasgow's my home. I want to stay. - You're staying?
0:00:04 > 0:00:08It just feels like Frankie's needling her way into my life.
0:00:08 > 0:00:11This is Frankie. Frankie's doing the photos for our new brochure.
0:00:11 > 0:00:15- I thought this might be one for Jay to take charge of actually.- Jay?
0:00:15 > 0:00:19Easier to be the scarlet woman than come out of the closet, I suppose.
0:00:19 > 0:00:21- I do love him.- We don't want to cause a scene, do we?
0:00:21 > 0:00:25I think you've managed that already, sweetheart. Aaargh!
0:00:25 > 0:00:29- I'm now dumped and homeless. - I can help you find somewhere.
0:00:29 > 0:00:31- You're moving in with Frankie?- Yeah.
0:00:31 > 0:00:35- Who's that then? - That's Hayley, the fit intern.
0:00:35 > 0:00:37She's been flirting with me non-stop.
0:00:39 > 0:00:41Hayley... Hayley.
0:00:41 > 0:00:43It's ketamine.
0:00:43 > 0:00:47The album she made of you as a kid, it's gone.
0:00:47 > 0:00:50Who the hell would want my photos? Something was sent here.
0:00:50 > 0:00:52A photo album? Sent to someone called Annie Cawthorne.
0:00:52 > 0:00:55We have got copies of most of the documents you requested.
0:00:55 > 0:00:58Your parents' death certificates along with your sister's.
0:00:58 > 0:01:01Little Francesca. Tragic losing someone so young.
0:01:01 > 0:01:04This programme contains strong language and some scenes of a sexual nature.
0:01:36 > 0:01:39- Is that all you've got? - Yep. All my worldly goods.
0:01:39 > 0:01:42Yeah, I'm the same. Just got a few bits.
0:01:44 > 0:01:47What?
0:01:47 > 0:01:49Tess, what is all this?
0:01:49 > 0:01:51- It's my life.- Is that everything?
0:01:51 > 0:01:54Absolutely everything.
0:01:54 > 0:01:57Oh, shit. I left my sponge bag in the bathroom.
0:01:57 > 0:01:59- I'll get it.- Thank you.
0:02:01 > 0:02:05- Oh, and there's a book on that weird shelf thing.- All right.
0:02:05 > 0:02:08And a jumper on the clothes horse by my room.
0:02:08 > 0:02:09And the mascara.
0:02:25 > 0:02:28- Oh, shit! Sorry.- It's all right.
0:02:28 > 0:02:32- I'm just looking for Tess's bag. - It's OK.
0:02:32 > 0:02:33No. Um...
0:02:36 > 0:02:37I'm Sam.
0:02:38 > 0:02:40Yeah.
0:02:40 > 0:02:42And you must be...Frankie?
0:02:42 > 0:02:47Yeah, Cat's told me all about you. It's nice to finally meet you.
0:02:48 > 0:02:49Yeah.
0:02:49 > 0:02:51Yeah.
0:03:10 > 0:03:12What the hell are you doing?
0:03:12 > 0:03:15Sorry, I was just... And your door was...?
0:03:15 > 0:03:17What? Open?
0:03:18 > 0:03:21- Sorry.- Frankie...
0:03:22 > 0:03:25I don't want to fight all the time. It's boring.
0:03:25 > 0:03:27Yeah, I agree.
0:03:32 > 0:03:35Shit, I remember that!
0:03:36 > 0:03:38Your gran's house.
0:03:38 > 0:03:40Officially the ugliest vase ever.
0:03:40 > 0:03:42I can't bring myself to chuck it out.
0:03:42 > 0:03:44It was the one last thing she gave me before she died.
0:03:46 > 0:03:48Are you OK?
0:03:48 > 0:03:51- Yeah.- Sure?
0:03:52 > 0:03:54Yeah, I'm fine.
0:03:55 > 0:03:58We used to raid her drinks cabinet when she was at church
0:03:58 > 0:04:01and mix cocktails in it. Remember? What was it again?
0:04:01 > 0:04:03Sambuca and Um Bongo...
0:04:03 > 0:04:05They drink it in the Congo.
0:04:05 > 0:04:07Which somehow I seriously doubt.
0:04:07 > 0:04:11Sam, this is Frankie. Frankie, Sam.
0:04:11 > 0:04:13We met.
0:04:13 > 0:04:16Do you mind if I borrow this? I've got court this morning.
0:04:16 > 0:04:18What are you planning to do? Flash the judge?
0:04:18 > 0:04:21You got to use what you got.
0:04:22 > 0:04:25Yeah, I'd better go. The driver will be doing his nut with Tess.
0:04:25 > 0:04:27I'll come and see her off.
0:04:27 > 0:04:28Bye bye, roomie.
0:04:30 > 0:04:31Love you.
0:04:31 > 0:04:32Love you, too.
0:04:36 > 0:04:38Bye.
0:04:39 > 0:04:43Oh, my God! "Love in the afternoon."
0:04:45 > 0:04:46Come on.
0:04:49 > 0:04:51Ugh!
0:05:04 > 0:05:06Want to meet for lunch?
0:05:06 > 0:05:09I doubt I'll be finished. These things have a habit of dragging on.
0:05:09 > 0:05:12- I'd love to watch you in court.- Yeah?
0:05:12 > 0:05:16- It's just like it is on the telly. - Really?- Oh, yeah.
0:05:16 > 0:05:18Yeah, good looking jury, a wise old beak.
0:05:18 > 0:05:20Me on the stand, being viciously cross-examined
0:05:20 > 0:05:23by a curiously sexy Glenn Close.
0:05:29 > 0:05:31Shit!
0:05:31 > 0:05:34- What?- My boss. I don't want to be late.
0:05:34 > 0:05:38- Not when he's so pleased with me already. I'll call you later.- OK.
0:05:38 > 0:05:40Give my regards to Glenn!
0:05:44 > 0:05:45Morning.
0:05:45 > 0:05:48Morning. My office, five minutes.
0:05:54 > 0:05:56Is this it?
0:05:56 > 0:05:57I guess so.
0:05:58 > 0:06:00Is it legit?
0:06:06 > 0:06:11Oh, my God! This is amazing!
0:06:14 > 0:06:16Nice one, Sadie.
0:06:18 > 0:06:21- You should shag a letting agent more often.- Yeah!
0:06:21 > 0:06:23Uh!
0:06:23 > 0:06:27My world may be turning to shit, but yes, we have some bongos.
0:06:31 > 0:06:33So, no doubt you heard our bright young intern
0:06:33 > 0:06:36- had an attack of the vapours in the office?- Yeah.
0:06:36 > 0:06:39Yeah, she hasn't been back. Is she still ill?
0:06:39 > 0:06:43Ill? Yeah, well that's what I assumed. Ketamine.
0:06:43 > 0:06:47- Sorry?- Commonly prescribed by vets as a horse tranquiliser.
0:06:47 > 0:06:49It seems like it's the drug of choice for our Hayley.
0:06:49 > 0:06:53Shit! Really? I had no idea.
0:06:53 > 0:06:56- No?- No! Course not.
0:06:56 > 0:07:00I can't believe it. She's bright and keen and good at her job.
0:07:00 > 0:07:02Not any more. I had to fire her.
0:07:02 > 0:07:06You see, the thing is, Cat, you interviewed her, hm?
0:07:06 > 0:07:08You recommended her, she's your protege.
0:07:08 > 0:07:10I thought you might've noticed she was taking drugs in the office.
0:07:10 > 0:07:14I didn't notice anything. Obviously. If I had, I would've done something.
0:07:14 > 0:07:17Yeah, you have been a bit distracted lately.
0:07:18 > 0:07:20Is that your new squeeze I saw this morning?
0:07:20 > 0:07:23- Her name's Sam.- Sam? Yeah, that's right, yeah.
0:07:23 > 0:07:27Which of the noble Sapphic professions does Sam belong to?
0:07:27 > 0:07:30Social worker? PE teacher? Freelance yoghurt maker?
0:07:30 > 0:07:33- She's a Detective Sergeant.- Oh!
0:07:33 > 0:07:37Well, maybe she'll be able to give you a few pointers next time.
0:07:37 > 0:07:39How to spot suspicious behaviour?
0:07:40 > 0:07:44So what it's like working at Cat and Jay's?
0:07:44 > 0:07:48Fascinating. I'm the Annie Leibovitz of architectural photography.
0:07:48 > 0:07:50Well, at least you've got a job.
0:07:50 > 0:07:52What are you up to today?
0:07:52 > 0:07:55Thought I'd take a spin round the Italian Centre.
0:07:55 > 0:07:57New handbag, haircut.
0:07:57 > 0:08:01- Just a bit of fun with my never-ending disposable income. - Enjoy that.- I will.
0:08:01 > 0:08:06- Then again, I might just watch Lou on the telly and drink my own body weight in gin.- Tess, get over it!
0:08:06 > 0:08:09- Plenty more lesbians in the loch. - Mm? You reckon!
0:08:09 > 0:08:11Trouble with you is you don't know where to look.
0:08:18 > 0:08:19Ah.
0:08:21 > 0:08:24There you go. "What you want, when you want it."
0:08:24 > 0:08:25Easy as ordering a pizza.
0:08:25 > 0:08:28No. Absolutely not. I'm not that desperate.
0:08:28 > 0:08:30It's full of skanks and psychos.
0:08:30 > 0:08:33- What d'you want your user name to be?- Clitoris.
0:08:33 > 0:08:36- And how are you spelling that? - Frankie, I don't want to do it.
0:08:36 > 0:08:37What's the alternative?
0:08:37 > 0:08:41- Sitting round here, pining after someone you can't have?- Yeah.
0:08:41 > 0:08:43It doesn't work.
0:08:43 > 0:08:46Just put a profile up and see what happens.
0:08:47 > 0:08:49Ah, OK.
0:08:49 > 0:08:50What you looking for?
0:08:50 > 0:08:53Friendship first? Fun?
0:08:53 > 0:08:55Fisting?
0:08:56 > 0:08:58Fisting.
0:09:01 > 0:09:03Did you know about Hayley?
0:09:03 > 0:09:05Hayley? What about her?
0:09:05 > 0:09:08She was off her tits. Ketamine, for chrissake.
0:09:08 > 0:09:10- Who said that?- Alistair.
0:09:10 > 0:09:12That's why she keeled over the other day.
0:09:12 > 0:09:14Did you know she was on something?
0:09:14 > 0:09:18- No, of course not. How would I know? - Exactly!
0:09:18 > 0:09:21Why would you take drugs in the office anyway? Stupid girl!
0:09:21 > 0:09:23God, I hope she's all right.
0:09:23 > 0:09:26I don't know why you're so worried. It's not your fault.
0:09:26 > 0:09:28That's not what Alistair thinks.
0:09:28 > 0:09:32He's been weird with me ever since I turned down his weekend cottage.
0:09:32 > 0:09:34Sheep shagging in Shetland.
0:09:34 > 0:09:35Then he finally susses I'm gay,
0:09:35 > 0:09:37it's given him a whole new stick to beat me with.
0:09:37 > 0:09:40Listen, don't worry about it, it'll all blow over.
0:10:04 > 0:10:05I was right.
0:10:05 > 0:10:09I've just been browsing members in this area and they're all...
0:10:09 > 0:10:11- What's that?- Nothing.
0:10:11 > 0:10:14Are you OK?
0:10:14 > 0:10:16I'm going to go to work.
0:10:36 > 0:10:39- Listen, don't tell Cat about Hayley, OK?- Why?
0:10:39 > 0:10:40Alistair's blaming her,
0:10:40 > 0:10:43she doesn't need to know I had anything to do with it.
0:10:43 > 0:10:45What? So Cat takes all the flak while you waltz away?
0:10:45 > 0:10:47It's not like that.
0:10:47 > 0:10:48Ssh.
0:10:48 > 0:10:49Hiya.
0:10:49 > 0:10:51Oh!
0:10:51 > 0:10:53Thanks.
0:10:54 > 0:10:58I've downloaded the images from the Haybridge Court Project,
0:10:58 > 0:11:00so we can take a look at them now.
0:11:01 > 0:11:05- What?- You. Straight to business. It's not like you.
0:11:05 > 0:11:07What's that supposed to mean?
0:11:07 > 0:11:12- Frankie.- I'm just trying to do my job, all right? Christ!
0:11:13 > 0:11:16What's the matter?
0:11:27 > 0:11:30Frankie, what's going on? And don't say nothing.
0:11:30 > 0:11:31Nothing.
0:11:31 > 0:11:35You're a crap liar. Come on, you're all over the place.
0:11:39 > 0:11:43All right. You want to know what's going on?
0:11:46 > 0:11:47I'm dead.
0:11:47 > 0:11:49What?
0:11:55 > 0:11:59I don't understand, the date on this...?
0:11:59 > 0:12:01- The same day my parents died. - The car crash.
0:12:01 > 0:12:06Francesca Alan died on the same day as her parents.
0:12:06 > 0:12:08But you survived. Your aunt and uncle...
0:12:08 > 0:12:10Took me in. Little orphan Frankie.
0:12:10 > 0:12:13No, no, they didn't because she was dead.
0:12:17 > 0:12:18Frankie...
0:12:18 > 0:12:20Fuck! This is...
0:12:22 > 0:12:25So you're not who they said, who they told you you were?
0:12:25 > 0:12:28- It's a total mindfuck.- Yeah.
0:12:28 > 0:12:30Yeah, it is.
0:12:30 > 0:12:34But you know what? I'm not even surprised.
0:12:34 > 0:12:36What d'you mean?
0:12:37 > 0:12:43I always knew that there was something that they weren't telling me, some secret.
0:12:43 > 0:12:46Conversations would stop when I walked into rooms,
0:12:46 > 0:12:48closed doors and whisperings and...
0:12:48 > 0:12:51I'm just trying to make sense of it.
0:12:51 > 0:12:55This... And the photo album.
0:12:55 > 0:12:59So who is she? Your aunt wanted her to have the photos.
0:13:01 > 0:13:06Do you think she could be your mother?
0:13:06 > 0:13:08Your real mother?
0:13:10 > 0:13:14- Frankie, it's OK.- No, it's not!
0:13:14 > 0:13:17That's the one thing it's not.
0:13:19 > 0:13:22Later in the programme we'll be talking to life coach Debbie Spatz,
0:13:22 > 0:13:24about the joy of spontaneous living.
0:13:24 > 0:13:28What the hell does Lou know about spontaneous living? Scheming witch!
0:13:28 > 0:13:30Mute her! Mute her!
0:13:32 > 0:13:35Look at how much make-up they've put on to cover the bruise!
0:13:35 > 0:13:37Don't mess with The Fist!
0:13:37 > 0:13:39Feeble exterior of a young Woody Allen,
0:13:39 > 0:13:41awesome fire power of Vin Diesel.
0:13:41 > 0:13:43COMPUTER PINGS
0:13:43 > 0:13:44What's that?
0:13:44 > 0:13:48Nothing. It's Frankie trying to get me back on the scene.
0:13:48 > 0:13:49- Internet dating?- I know.
0:13:49 > 0:13:53Seriously, I mean, you should look at some of these girls.
0:13:53 > 0:13:56Most of them are just desperate hets after a free lezzy floor show.
0:13:56 > 0:13:58- How can you tell?- Easy, look.
0:14:03 > 0:14:04Like hell she's bi.
0:14:04 > 0:14:07Why the hell do they have to have a dog in the picture?
0:14:07 > 0:14:10I do find spaniels particularly erotic.
0:14:10 > 0:14:13Oh, and then there's this one. My favourite.
0:14:13 > 0:14:18Berlin Mary. "Back in Glasgow. Zis time I am super horny.
0:14:18 > 0:14:23"First we will have the sex. Then we will proceed to the next level."
0:14:23 > 0:14:24COMPUTER PINGS
0:14:24 > 0:14:27- What's that?- It just means someone's interested.
0:14:27 > 0:14:31Don't get excited, it'll just be another minger.
0:14:31 > 0:14:34- She's all right.- Really?
0:14:34 > 0:14:37She is, isn't she? She's hot.
0:14:37 > 0:14:38Do you think she's hot?
0:14:38 > 0:14:40COMPUTER PINGS
0:14:40 > 0:14:43- She wants to chat. I can't do it, my fingers are sweaty. You do it.- No!
0:14:43 > 0:14:46Go on, you're the writer. Write something funny, witty, sexy
0:14:46 > 0:14:49so she'll think I'm fantastic and want to go out with me.
0:14:49 > 0:14:51- Actually, I have to go. - What? Where are you going?
0:14:51 > 0:14:53- I've got a date.- What?
0:14:53 > 0:14:55At three o'clock in the afternoon? You never said.
0:14:55 > 0:14:59- I don't tell you everything. - Except that you do.
0:14:59 > 0:15:00Who's the lucky girl?
0:15:00 > 0:15:04Melanie. In my creative writing class.
0:15:04 > 0:15:05She's really nice.
0:15:05 > 0:15:07Obsessed with Philip Roth.
0:15:07 > 0:15:11Oh, I love him! Pulp Fiction. That scene in the diner. Remember?
0:15:11 > 0:15:12No, that's Tim Roth.
0:15:12 > 0:15:16I'm talking about Philip Roth. Celebrated New York Jewish novelist,
0:15:16 > 0:15:17not a bloody actor.
0:15:17 > 0:15:18All right! Don't get punchy.
0:15:18 > 0:15:24- Is this what you're going to be like since your little street fight? - I'm off. Enjoy your internet date.
0:15:24 > 0:15:26I never said I was going to meet her!
0:15:34 > 0:15:35Why don't I talk to Sam?
0:15:35 > 0:15:40- No.- Why not? Least she could see if Annie Cawthorne's ever come up?
0:15:40 > 0:15:41You have an address for her.
0:15:41 > 0:15:44Don't tell her. I don't want anyone to know, OK?
0:15:44 > 0:15:47Then how else are you going to find out who she is?
0:15:48 > 0:15:50Do you think she'd even do it?
0:15:50 > 0:15:52Probably, if I asked her.
0:15:52 > 0:15:55You've got her wrapped around your finger, have you?
0:15:55 > 0:15:58No. Sam's a grown-up.
0:15:58 > 0:16:02In fact this might be my first attempt at a grown-up relationship.
0:16:02 > 0:16:05And before you say it, that doesn't mean it's boring.
0:16:05 > 0:16:09Yeah, I wasn't going to say that. I'm pleased for you.
0:16:09 > 0:16:10No, you're not!
0:16:10 > 0:16:13Well, someone should be happy. It might as well be you.
0:16:16 > 0:16:18So how's the new place?
0:16:18 > 0:16:20It's mental. Massive.
0:16:20 > 0:16:23You should drop by sometime, take a look.
0:16:23 > 0:16:25Yeah. Yeah, I might.
0:16:33 > 0:16:35Maths homework?
0:16:35 > 0:16:37Becky's arranged for us to see a mortgage adviser.
0:16:37 > 0:16:40God, it's fun all the way with you two.
0:16:40 > 0:16:42Oh, God!
0:16:42 > 0:16:46You know how long it's going to take me to pay this...thing off?
0:16:46 > 0:16:4830 years!
0:16:48 > 0:16:5230 years of fucking wage slaving.
0:16:52 > 0:16:54Not to mention your other costs.
0:16:54 > 0:16:57- What?- Your nanny. Your vets bills.
0:16:57 > 0:16:59Your 2.4 are going to want a pet.
0:17:03 > 0:17:04Hi, Sam, it's me.
0:17:04 > 0:17:07Good. Can you do me a favour?
0:17:07 > 0:17:09I just need you to look someone up. Is that OK?
0:17:09 > 0:17:12Oh, it's not for me.
0:17:12 > 0:17:14It's for one of the secretaries.
0:17:14 > 0:17:16Annie Cawthorne.
0:17:17 > 0:17:1948 Claydon Court...
0:17:21 > 0:17:23Ashmill Estate...
0:17:23 > 0:17:24Glasgow.
0:17:26 > 0:17:28Talk to anyone who's done internet dating,
0:17:28 > 0:17:30- we've all got war stories.- And you?
0:17:30 > 0:17:34Right, the worst was this teacher. Faye.
0:17:34 > 0:17:36Great profile, talked for ages online.
0:17:36 > 0:17:39In the flesh she was like something out of Jane Austen.
0:17:39 > 0:17:43- Yeah, but underneath the corset...? - We didn't get that far, believe me.
0:17:43 > 0:17:45I knew as soon as I met her
0:17:45 > 0:17:48she didn't have the right sense of adventure.
0:17:49 > 0:17:54- You're adventurous, aren't you, Tess? - Mmm, yeah, course.
0:17:54 > 0:17:55You want another?
0:17:55 > 0:17:57Yeah. I'll get them.
0:17:57 > 0:17:59You stay here and enjoy the view.
0:18:04 > 0:18:06Two Ezos, please.
0:18:08 > 0:18:09Hi.
0:18:09 > 0:18:11Hi.
0:18:12 > 0:18:14You look familiar.
0:18:15 > 0:18:18No, I don't think so. Maybe.
0:18:22 > 0:18:24Ooh.
0:18:30 > 0:18:32So then I did my dissertation
0:18:32 > 0:18:35on post-modern identity in the American novel
0:18:35 > 0:18:39- and that's when I really fell in love with Roth.- Wow.
0:18:41 > 0:18:43What?
0:18:43 > 0:18:45You've got a bit of crisp on your lip.
0:18:45 > 0:18:46There?
0:18:46 > 0:18:49No, it's just underneath.
0:18:49 > 0:18:50Do you want me to?
0:18:53 > 0:18:54Thanks.
0:18:56 > 0:18:59I had a date in a coffee shop once
0:18:59 > 0:19:03and I thought it had gone really well, but when I went to the loos,
0:19:03 > 0:19:07I realised I had chocolate from my cappuccino all over my lip.
0:19:07 > 0:19:09A little cocoa Hitler moustache?
0:19:09 > 0:19:13No, big curly whirly impresario affair.
0:19:13 > 0:19:14Fetching!
0:19:16 > 0:19:18I've got a friend called Tess.
0:19:18 > 0:19:20She's an actress.
0:19:20 > 0:19:24She did this play once where she had to wear a false beard,
0:19:24 > 0:19:26a big bushy white thing.
0:19:26 > 0:19:30Trouble is, they stuck it on with the wrong stuff, superglue or something,
0:19:30 > 0:19:32she was wispy for weeks.
0:19:32 > 0:19:33Oh, my God!
0:19:33 > 0:19:36No, she liked it. She said it made her feel Christmassy.
0:19:36 > 0:19:38She sounds mental.
0:19:38 > 0:19:44Yeah, she is. She's great, but she's also...frustrating.
0:19:45 > 0:19:49She's one of these people who can't see what's right in front of her, you know?
0:19:49 > 0:19:52Like she can't appreciate what she's already got.
0:19:57 > 0:19:59Do you want another?
0:19:59 > 0:20:00Er... Yeah!
0:20:16 > 0:20:17Over the top, over the top.
0:20:28 > 0:20:30Whoa!
0:20:31 > 0:20:32- Turn it round.- Eh?
0:20:32 > 0:20:34The other way.
0:20:34 > 0:20:35Um...
0:20:37 > 0:20:38What the fuck?
0:20:41 > 0:20:42All right, hen.
0:20:42 > 0:20:46Sorry, um... Who is this?
0:20:46 > 0:20:47This is Dougie.
0:20:47 > 0:20:49Douglas.
0:20:49 > 0:20:53My husband, but don't worry, he just likes to watch. Now where were we?
0:20:53 > 0:20:56No, no, no, I'm sorry. I thought you were gay.
0:20:56 > 0:20:58We're more...
0:20:58 > 0:20:59bi-curious.
0:20:59 > 0:21:00BANGING
0:21:00 > 0:21:02Whoa! What was that?
0:21:02 > 0:21:03- It's just Lady.- What lady?
0:21:03 > 0:21:07No, Lady! Our Allie. Our German Shepherd.
0:21:07 > 0:21:09Goes a bit frantic when we shut him in the kitchen.
0:21:09 > 0:21:11Um, I think I'm...
0:21:14 > 0:21:16You see! This is my problem.
0:21:16 > 0:21:20Why don't you look at me like that any more?
0:21:20 > 0:21:22HOWLING
0:21:22 > 0:21:24It's like Roth's books.
0:21:24 > 0:21:27- They're almost anti-love stories. - Yeah.
0:21:27 > 0:21:32- You know? The pain, the... - The inescapable despair of desire.
0:21:32 > 0:21:37- Yeah. How... How love fractures us. - Yeah.- Leaves us in pieces.- Doomed.
0:21:37 > 0:21:39It's doomed to failure.
0:21:40 > 0:21:42I just find it...
0:21:42 > 0:21:44- Captivating.- Depressing.
0:21:49 > 0:21:50Another drink?
0:21:50 > 0:21:54Erm... No, I'd better not. I've got an early lecture tomorrow.
0:21:54 > 0:21:58You're good. I've a friend called Tess. She doesn't know when to stop.
0:21:58 > 0:22:02Spirits and then shots and that's when she gets really wild.
0:22:02 > 0:22:04You know, like really self obsessed.
0:22:04 > 0:22:08Like she's the only one in the world, the only one that matters.
0:22:09 > 0:22:11Are you going already?
0:22:12 > 0:22:14It's been great.
0:22:14 > 0:22:16A really great date.
0:22:19 > 0:22:20Can we do this again?
0:22:20 > 0:22:21Look, I'll call you.
0:22:29 > 0:22:31You see, this is marriage, Tess.
0:22:32 > 0:22:35First the excitement goes, then the passion.
0:22:35 > 0:22:38- Baby, dunnae... - Don't "baby" me, I'm serious.
0:22:38 > 0:22:39Um, can I just...
0:22:42 > 0:22:43Thanks.
0:22:43 > 0:22:45That's why we thought about the internet dating.
0:22:45 > 0:22:48It hasn't gone as well as we hoped, has it, Doug?
0:22:48 > 0:22:52Douglas, at least look at me while I'm talking to you!
0:22:52 > 0:22:56- Well, look, I... I think it's really great that you're trying.- Do you?
0:22:56 > 0:22:58Yeah, yeah!
0:22:58 > 0:23:01Anything you can do to keep the passion alive.
0:23:01 > 0:23:03It's like cooking, isn't it?
0:23:03 > 0:23:05You can have shepherd's pie every night,
0:23:05 > 0:23:07but why not add a little spice?
0:23:07 > 0:23:13Some chilli, pepper, a bit of turmeric...
0:23:14 > 0:23:17Aye, that's very good. That's very profound.
0:23:17 > 0:23:21You should be on the television, Tess. You're very good at this.
0:23:21 > 0:23:23Cos that's all I want.
0:23:23 > 0:23:25To make Dougie happy.
0:23:25 > 0:23:27Aye, me too, Hen.
0:23:27 > 0:23:29Me, too.
0:23:29 > 0:23:30Um...
0:23:30 > 0:23:32I'll just let myself out.
0:23:38 > 0:23:43Sorry, I didn't realise it had gotten so late.
0:23:43 > 0:23:44I should've rung you.
0:23:44 > 0:23:46It's all right. You OK?
0:23:46 > 0:23:51Just about. Their defence barrister is a bitch in horsehair.
0:23:51 > 0:23:53My brain hurts.
0:23:54 > 0:23:55Poor brain.
0:23:56 > 0:23:59- Do you want a drink?- Yes.
0:24:03 > 0:24:05- Sam?- Mmm?
0:24:05 > 0:24:07I was just wondering if you had a chance
0:24:07 > 0:24:10to do that thing for me, look up that name?
0:24:10 > 0:24:12Mm, I did.
0:24:12 > 0:24:14Great, thank you so much.
0:24:16 > 0:24:17So did you find anything out?
0:24:19 > 0:24:22The only Cawthorne registered to that address
0:24:22 > 0:24:24is an alias for an Alma Carter.
0:24:24 > 0:24:26Alias? She's a criminal?
0:24:26 > 0:24:28Yeah, small time.
0:24:28 > 0:24:30She's got a couple of priors for theft,
0:24:30 > 0:24:33but we're talking way back, 30 years or more.
0:24:33 > 0:24:36Thanks. Thanks for doing that.
0:24:38 > 0:24:39No problem.
0:24:42 > 0:24:45Who did you say it was for?
0:24:45 > 0:24:46You said it was someone at work?
0:24:46 > 0:24:49Yeah. Yeah, just one of the secretaries.
0:24:49 > 0:24:50She's having a few family issues.
0:24:52 > 0:24:53It's nice of you to help her.
0:24:57 > 0:24:59SIREN
0:24:59 > 0:25:01DOOR BUZZES
0:25:14 > 0:25:17- Hey. - Don't look too pleased to see me.
0:25:17 > 0:25:20- Sorry. - Or were you expecting someone else?
0:25:20 > 0:25:23No, I just... I didn't know you were coming, that's all.
0:25:23 > 0:25:26Wanted to see how you were settling in? Like it?
0:25:26 > 0:25:28Yeah, it's all right. Yeah.
0:25:28 > 0:25:31All right? It fucking rocks!
0:25:31 > 0:25:33Do you know how lucky you are to be shagging me?
0:25:36 > 0:25:39To another satisfied client.
0:25:53 > 0:25:54What?
0:25:54 > 0:25:56Let's just have a drink, yeah?
0:25:56 > 0:25:59Don't worry, I can multi-task.
0:25:59 > 0:26:02Yeah. Sadie, don't.
0:26:02 > 0:26:05Come on, is this all the thanks I'm going to get?
0:26:05 > 0:26:07What? So I've got to fuck you just cos you found me a flat?
0:26:07 > 0:26:09Cos I didn't ask you to.
0:26:09 > 0:26:12For God's sake, that's not what I meant.
0:26:12 > 0:26:14- What's wrong with you tonight? - Nothing's wrong with me.
0:26:14 > 0:26:16I'm just not in the mood.
0:26:20 > 0:26:22Suit yourself.
0:26:22 > 0:26:24Your loss.
0:26:42 > 0:26:44What did I do to deserve this?
0:26:44 > 0:26:46I just felt like it.
0:26:49 > 0:26:51Ah, that is good.
0:26:51 > 0:26:55Mm, my first and last decent cup of the day.
0:26:55 > 0:26:57The coffee at court tastes vile.
0:26:57 > 0:26:59I can make you a flask?
0:26:59 > 0:27:01Let's wait till we're really middle-aged.
0:27:03 > 0:27:07Hey, don't forget this Annie Cawthorne stuff.
0:27:17 > 0:27:18Want some?
0:27:18 > 0:27:20I made it for you.
0:27:20 > 0:27:22Yeah, and I want to share it.
0:27:28 > 0:27:29- Oh, shit.- What?
0:27:29 > 0:27:32Oh, God!
0:27:32 > 0:27:36- What's the problem? - Lunch with my parents! Today!
0:27:36 > 0:27:38- That's the problem.- Your parents?
0:27:40 > 0:27:43- You could come with me.- What?
0:27:45 > 0:27:47You're my girlfriend. You should meet my parents.
0:27:50 > 0:27:51Are you sure?
0:27:52 > 0:27:53I'm sure.
0:27:53 > 0:27:55I'll call you later.
0:28:33 > 0:28:34Shit!
0:28:45 > 0:28:47Now you remember the time, right?
0:28:47 > 0:28:51And please try to stay tidy because we need to look serious and committed.
0:28:51 > 0:28:53Committed? You should be in that tie.
0:28:53 > 0:28:56Thanks, Frankie, always nice to have your support.
0:28:56 > 0:28:57We're meeting our financial advisor later.
0:28:57 > 0:28:59Three o'clock. Don't be late.
0:28:59 > 0:29:01I won't.
0:29:04 > 0:29:07Dead Man Walking.
0:29:07 > 0:29:10It's a mortgage, Frankie. Not a death sentence.
0:29:10 > 0:29:12Yeah. Loving the noose.
0:29:12 > 0:29:15Look, you can take the piss all you want but this is not the end for me, all right?
0:29:15 > 0:29:19I have options. Choices. It's not like I'm stuck on a path.
0:29:19 > 0:29:23- It's not like I can't get off if I want to.- And do you?
0:29:27 > 0:29:29You know Hayley?
0:29:29 > 0:29:34- She snogged me.- Did she? No wonder she had to take drugs.- Frankie?
0:29:34 > 0:29:37Um, Sam looked up that thing you wanted.
0:29:41 > 0:29:46Annie Cawthorne's an alias for somebody called Alma Carter.
0:29:46 > 0:29:48She has convictions.
0:29:48 > 0:29:52Theft, but they're ancient, like 30 years ago.
0:29:52 > 0:29:54- She's a criminal?- Was.
0:29:54 > 0:29:59Was. Sam said that these things on the record, they're from ages ago,
0:29:59 > 0:30:03- so they probably don't count.- Great. That's just great. So I'm dead,
0:30:03 > 0:30:08I'm connected to a criminal and there's some strange drug dealer bloke that keeps following me.
0:30:08 > 0:30:09What bloke?
0:30:11 > 0:30:15- Where are you going? - Where do you think?- Frankie.
0:30:29 > 0:30:33And how dare they use me to spice up their marriage?
0:30:33 > 0:30:36Like I'm some kind of lesbian court jester.
0:30:36 > 0:30:38Tess, will you hurry up! My mum's booked the table.
0:30:38 > 0:30:41All these crazy femmes who turn out to be straight and I never notice, I never guess.
0:30:41 > 0:30:43"Sense of adventure"?
0:30:43 > 0:30:45That was not an adventure.
0:30:45 > 0:30:47- And you know the worst thing? - Fine, I'll just wait then.
0:30:47 > 0:30:49The worse thing is, I got hit on!
0:30:49 > 0:30:53I passed up a really fit lesbian and for what?
0:30:53 > 0:30:56A heterosexual freak show.
0:30:58 > 0:31:00Tess, what the hell are you looking at?
0:31:00 > 0:31:02Nothing. Birds.
0:31:02 > 0:31:04Flying up in the thing...
0:31:04 > 0:31:06Right, OK, I'm ready.
0:31:06 > 0:31:08Where's my coat?
0:31:10 > 0:31:12Tiramisu with Judy and Gerry.
0:31:12 > 0:31:14Who could say no?
0:31:14 > 0:31:18I think this is lovely.
0:31:18 > 0:31:20Gerry, for goodness' sake.
0:31:20 > 0:31:24He likes to build things. ..Gerry? I was just saying,
0:31:24 > 0:31:25this is lovely, isn't it?
0:31:25 > 0:31:29Yes, it's nice to see you all.
0:31:29 > 0:31:31Thank you for making a...
0:31:31 > 0:31:33you know.
0:31:33 > 0:31:36And to meet Cat's new girlfriend.
0:31:36 > 0:31:39Super! And a police woman?
0:31:39 > 0:31:42Have you been at "the nick" this morning, Sam?
0:31:42 > 0:31:49Um, actually I've been in court, giving evidence against a serial rapist.
0:31:49 > 0:31:52Rape. Now that is not very nice.
0:31:52 > 0:31:55Conjunctivitis is not very nice, Mother.
0:31:55 > 0:32:00But rape, I think, qualifies as something slightly worse than that.
0:32:00 > 0:32:03She takes things very literally, our Catherine, always has.
0:32:03 > 0:32:06I think she might be slightly autistic.
0:32:41 > 0:32:44So, the police service?
0:32:44 > 0:32:48- That must be very rewarding, decent salary?- Mum! Please.
0:32:48 > 0:32:52It's OK. When you join up, you know what you let yourself in for.
0:32:52 > 0:32:56Public service pay and a polyester uniform. Winning combination.
0:32:56 > 0:32:58Super!
0:32:58 > 0:33:02Of course Ed's doing so well writing his very own science book.
0:33:02 > 0:33:06- Science fiction, Mum. - That's what I said, darling.
0:33:06 > 0:33:08And Tess, still acting?
0:33:08 > 0:33:12Oh, you know me, Judy. I just go with the flow, like a piece of driftwood.
0:33:12 > 0:33:16Ha-ha. Such a free spirit.
0:33:16 > 0:33:19And then there's Cat with her...
0:33:19 > 0:33:21architecture.
0:33:21 > 0:33:23You see, that's the problem.
0:33:23 > 0:33:26Very long training, expensive.
0:33:26 > 0:33:29It's a big investment for everyone for uncertain rewards.
0:33:29 > 0:33:34Still, you always put your dreams on hold for your children, don't you?
0:33:34 > 0:33:36It must be worth it, Judy?
0:33:36 > 0:33:41You know, seeing all that Catherine's achieved and knowing she couldn't have done it without you?
0:33:41 > 0:33:43Well, yes.
0:33:43 > 0:33:49Exactly, yes. And we're all very proud, yes.
0:33:56 > 0:33:57So?
0:33:57 > 0:34:00- Little Francesca.- Can I come in?
0:34:00 > 0:34:03You turned your back on us, young lady.
0:34:03 > 0:34:06Our door's always been open to you.
0:34:16 > 0:34:19I'm sorry.
0:34:19 > 0:34:21The funeral. I was out of line.
0:34:25 > 0:34:28I want to ask you something.
0:34:28 > 0:34:30About me...
0:34:30 > 0:34:33- where I came from. - New York, wasn't it?
0:34:33 > 0:34:38- I find it hard to keep up with you girls.- As a baby. Where you got me.
0:34:38 > 0:34:41The birds and the bees, Francesca.
0:34:41 > 0:34:42Isn't it a bit late for all that?
0:34:42 > 0:34:45I'm not Francesca though, am I?
0:35:03 > 0:35:06- Where did you get this? - The registry office.
0:35:13 > 0:35:17Everything we did was in your best interests.
0:35:25 > 0:35:26And who is Alma Carter?
0:35:26 > 0:35:29Is she my mother?
0:35:29 > 0:35:31My real mother?
0:35:31 > 0:35:33I don't know who you're talking about. I've never heard of this.
0:35:33 > 0:35:38Alma Carter! Aunt Carol sent her my photo album before she died.
0:35:38 > 0:35:41I'm sorry.
0:35:41 > 0:35:45Jesus, am I even related to you at all? Are you anything to do with me?
0:35:45 > 0:35:47Oh, hello, Gillian.
0:35:47 > 0:35:50You remember my niece?
0:35:52 > 0:35:56I'd like to help you so I'm telling you this for your own good.
0:35:56 > 0:35:59Stop looking, asking questions.
0:35:59 > 0:36:02You won't like the answer.
0:36:02 > 0:36:04Alma Carter's not interested.
0:36:04 > 0:36:06Not then.
0:36:06 > 0:36:08Not now.
0:36:08 > 0:36:11She didn't want you.
0:36:43 > 0:36:46Excuse me. Could we have the bill, please?
0:36:46 > 0:36:48Yeah, sure.
0:36:48 > 0:36:52Oh, you might want to powder your nose if you're in there, darling.
0:36:56 > 0:36:59She's such an attractive girl Tess, don't you think, Gerry?
0:36:59 > 0:37:03And these two make a very attractive couple.
0:37:03 > 0:37:08- Have you thought about it, Edward? She could be the one?- What?
0:37:08 > 0:37:09No, no, she's not the one, Mother.
0:37:09 > 0:37:12There is no one, OK?
0:37:12 > 0:37:15I'm not seeing anyone, not going anywhere... I'm stuck.
0:37:15 > 0:37:16Sorry, isn't Tess...?
0:37:16 > 0:37:19Gay? Yes, she is. As my mother is only too well aware.
0:37:19 > 0:37:22I think we're all a bit gay, dear, aren't we?
0:37:22 > 0:37:27That's the trouble with Ed, he lets everything become an obstacle.
0:37:27 > 0:37:29PHONE RINGS
0:37:29 > 0:37:31Excuse me.
0:37:36 > 0:37:37Hello?
0:37:58 > 0:38:01- Yeah?- Sadie, where are you?
0:38:17 > 0:38:21Oi! You stopped being a moody twat then, have you?
0:38:23 > 0:38:26- Whose is this place? - Last night's conquest.
0:38:26 > 0:38:30A tragic little banker called Josephine that I picked up at Babylon.
0:38:30 > 0:38:33She was a crap shag though. All toys and no imagination.
0:38:33 > 0:38:35Oh, yeah?
0:38:38 > 0:38:40So this Josephine, where is she now?
0:38:40 > 0:38:43Don't tell me you've left her tied up upstairs?
0:38:43 > 0:38:47No, she got an early flight to Charles de Gaulle this morning,
0:38:47 > 0:38:50leaving yours truly holding the keys.
0:38:56 > 0:39:01- Thank you.- For what?- You were great. The way you handled my mother!
0:39:01 > 0:39:04Ah well, I guess I've just had a lot of practice dealing with...
0:39:04 > 0:39:07- Psychopaths? - Cat, your mother's not a psycho.
0:39:07 > 0:39:10- She's just more borderline personality disorder.- Really?
0:39:10 > 0:39:13- So what does that make me?- You?
0:39:13 > 0:39:15Where do I start?
0:39:26 > 0:39:29I can't do this.
0:39:29 > 0:39:31You seem to be doing all right.
0:39:31 > 0:39:33No, I can't. It's...
0:39:33 > 0:39:36You've been so great today and it just...
0:39:36 > 0:39:38makes me feel even shittier.
0:39:41 > 0:39:44- I lied to you.- About what?
0:39:44 > 0:39:48That name. It wasn't for one of the secretaries.
0:39:48 > 0:39:50It was for Frankie.
0:39:50 > 0:39:53Of course it was.
0:39:53 > 0:39:55I was just wondering when you were going to tell me.
0:39:57 > 0:39:58You knew?
0:39:58 > 0:40:01What's my job?
0:40:01 > 0:40:05I know! And I'm a terrible liar. It's just...
0:40:05 > 0:40:09- Frankie asked me not to tell anyone.- About what?
0:40:09 > 0:40:13Oh, nothing. It's just she doesn't want anyone to know about her stuff.
0:40:13 > 0:40:18Cat, is there, um... Is there anything that I need to worry about?
0:40:18 > 0:40:23You and Frankie, you know, you obviously go back a long way and...
0:40:23 > 0:40:28She's... She's a friend, that's all. Not even a very good one.
0:40:29 > 0:40:31OK.
0:40:31 > 0:40:34But you have absolutely nothing to worry about.
0:40:34 > 0:40:36OK!
0:40:38 > 0:40:40Just don't lie to me again.
0:40:46 > 0:40:49Do you want to go for a drink? Yeah?
0:40:49 > 0:40:53MUSIC BLARING
0:40:58 > 0:41:01On your marks! Get your car keys!
0:41:31 > 0:41:33Good stuff.
0:41:33 > 0:41:37Private prescription, maximum strength.
0:41:39 > 0:41:42Question is, how many do I need?
0:41:44 > 0:41:46Depends on how much you want to forget.
0:41:57 > 0:42:01Look at you. Two cocktails and you're anybody's.
0:42:01 > 0:42:05Not anybody's. Yours.
0:42:42 > 0:42:45The taxi driver won't like it.
0:42:45 > 0:42:47He's a Daily Mail reader.
0:42:47 > 0:42:49Fuck him.
0:42:53 > 0:42:56No, don't fuck him.
0:42:56 > 0:42:57Fuck me.
0:43:56 > 0:43:58Frankie?
0:43:58 > 0:44:00What the fuck are you doing?
0:44:04 > 0:44:08Rape. Now that's not very nice.
0:44:09 > 0:44:12Genocide, also not very nice.
0:44:12 > 0:44:16- Right, I'm off.- No, no, no, no! I haven't said the best bit!
0:44:16 > 0:44:20The best bit was when your mum accused Cat of being autistic.
0:44:20 > 0:44:25And then there was your dad, counting cutlery like he's in fucking Rainman.
0:44:25 > 0:44:27Yay! He smiles!
0:44:28 > 0:44:31You know, you're my best audience, Ed.
0:44:31 > 0:44:35In fact you're my only audience, so you must never leave me.
0:44:39 > 0:44:42- Do you know what else my mum said? - What?
0:44:42 > 0:44:47- She said we'd make a really attractive couple.- Mental!
0:44:47 > 0:44:48Yeah.
0:44:51 > 0:44:54DOOR BUZZER I'll get it.
0:44:57 > 0:45:01Surprise! Ho, ho, ho! Nice pad!
0:45:01 > 0:45:03- All right, babe?- Jay!
0:45:03 > 0:45:06Let's get the party started!
0:45:12 > 0:45:13Look at the size of this place!
0:45:45 > 0:45:47Shave for me.
0:45:47 > 0:45:48What?
0:45:50 > 0:45:53Everything.
0:45:53 > 0:45:54Shave it all off.
0:45:54 > 0:45:57I've only got a landing strip.
0:46:21 > 0:46:23Open your legs.
0:46:25 > 0:46:27Wider.
0:46:56 > 0:46:58Lift your head up.
0:46:59 > 0:47:03Put your arm behind your head.
0:47:36 > 0:47:38KNOCK ON DOOR
0:47:38 > 0:47:41Hello?
0:47:41 > 0:47:44Josephine, is that you?
0:47:44 > 0:47:46It's me, Lainie, I'm here to feed your fish.
0:47:49 > 0:47:52Look, this is a mistake.
0:47:52 > 0:47:55We're friends of Jackie's... Josephine's.
0:47:55 > 0:47:59That's not true. I've been cleaning here for three years.
0:47:59 > 0:48:01I've never seen these people before in my life.
0:48:01 > 0:48:04- She's lying.- How would you know?
0:48:04 > 0:48:06We were together last night.
0:48:06 > 0:48:09Quite the squealer is Josephine.
0:48:09 > 0:48:12I think the best thing would be for you two to come down to the station.
0:48:12 > 0:48:14We'll try and sort all this out, get in touch with the owner.
0:48:14 > 0:48:19- Paris, you say?- No, no. You don't want to do that.- And why's that?
0:48:19 > 0:48:22Call Sam Murray. She's a detective sergeant. She'll sort this out.
0:48:24 > 0:48:31- Is that right?- Yeah, cos this isn't what it looks like and I wouldn't want you to make a mistake.
0:48:39 > 0:48:40No! Look...
0:48:40 > 0:48:42- What are you doing? - Just leave me to deal with this.
0:48:42 > 0:48:44I know what I'm doing.
0:49:13 > 0:49:18Tess, have we got any crisps?
0:49:18 > 0:49:22Sweeties? Brownie mix? Anything?
0:49:22 > 0:49:24Tess?
0:49:24 > 0:49:29- What you looking at?- Oh, nothing. Just another missed opportunity.
0:49:32 > 0:49:35- How much have you had to drink? - Not enough.
0:49:38 > 0:49:40Cheers.
0:49:42 > 0:49:45They were left in the house, Clive. It's implied consent.
0:49:45 > 0:49:47I'm just sorry you got dragged into it.
0:49:47 > 0:49:49OK.
0:49:55 > 0:50:00Tell me why should I do this? Why should I have to vouch for you two?
0:50:00 > 0:50:03- Who is this, Frankie?- This?
0:50:03 > 0:50:06This is Sadie. My girlfriend.
0:50:06 > 0:50:09Your girlfriend, Frankie?
0:50:09 > 0:50:12- Your standards are dropping. - Piss off.
0:50:12 > 0:50:16Just clean up this mess and get the hell out of here.
0:50:19 > 0:50:22I'm so, so sorry.
0:50:39 > 0:50:42- You cheated!- Suck it up.
0:50:45 > 0:50:47- Yay!- Stranger!
0:50:49 > 0:50:52- What happened to you?- Not much.
0:50:52 > 0:50:54How was your day?
0:50:54 > 0:50:57- Fabulous. - You didn't get your mortgage then?
0:50:57 > 0:51:00No. We did.
0:51:13 > 0:51:16Oh, my God. I need my bed.
0:51:17 > 0:51:20- The room's spinning. - Have a glass of water.
0:51:20 > 0:51:23- Have a go on this bad boy. - No, thanks.
0:51:23 > 0:51:26Ed, you can stay in my bed if you want.
0:51:27 > 0:51:31I'm going to go home. Get the last bus.
0:51:31 > 0:51:36You should stay. The state she's in you won't even need rohypnol.
0:51:36 > 0:51:40- Piss off, Frankie. - See you later, Teddy boy.
0:51:43 > 0:51:44See ya.
0:51:49 > 0:51:54So...what do you want to do now?
0:51:56 > 0:51:58I want another drink.
0:51:59 > 0:52:02- What's...?- I'm sure I saw something.
0:52:02 > 0:52:04Yeah, is that... What's that? Is that tequila?
0:52:04 > 0:52:07Looks like tequila!
0:52:07 > 0:52:09Urgh, it smells like Domestos.
0:52:11 > 0:52:12Aaah!
0:52:16 > 0:52:20Christ, I shouldn't drink any more.
0:52:20 > 0:52:22Who said?
0:52:24 > 0:52:26PHONE RINGS
0:52:26 > 0:52:27Oh!
0:52:27 > 0:52:29Ring ring!
0:52:29 > 0:52:32Becky.
0:52:35 > 0:52:37Uh-oh. What's going on with you two?
0:52:37 > 0:52:40Nothing, nothing. It's all good.
0:52:40 > 0:52:43I love Becky. I do...
0:52:43 > 0:52:46At least I think I do. I'm pretty sure...
0:52:46 > 0:52:49But how do you know? How do you know?
0:52:49 > 0:52:52You're asking me?
0:52:52 > 0:52:53It's just this...
0:52:53 > 0:52:56It's just this moving in thing.
0:52:56 > 0:53:00I just feel as if I'm being pushed, like I'm signing my life away for something I'm not even sure I want.
0:53:00 > 0:53:04It's like my heart says one thing but my cock's saying another.
0:53:04 > 0:53:06Am I making...? I'm...
0:53:06 > 0:53:08I'm not making any sense, am I?
0:53:12 > 0:53:13Oh, God, I'm pissed.
0:53:17 > 0:53:19Get you!
0:53:19 > 0:53:21You're so...
0:53:21 > 0:53:24controlled. Got it all together.
0:53:25 > 0:53:29- You what?- Good old Frankie. Doesn't say anything.
0:53:29 > 0:53:33Doesn't get sucked in. Fuck and run Frankie.
0:53:38 > 0:53:40You don't know anything.
0:53:40 > 0:53:46So, tell me, Frankie, this love thing.
0:53:46 > 0:53:49Is there someone...anyone...
0:53:49 > 0:53:54that grabs your heart and fucks with your head?
0:53:55 > 0:53:57Cos I don't know if I can do it.
0:54:02 > 0:54:04Frankie?
0:54:10 > 0:54:14Cat. It's always been Cat.
0:54:17 > 0:54:19Of course it has.
0:54:24 > 0:54:26Oi...
0:54:26 > 0:54:29Oh, Christ.
0:54:29 > 0:54:30Hey...
0:54:38 > 0:54:42Poor Frankie.
0:54:42 > 0:54:44Poor pissed Frankie
0:54:44 > 0:54:46with her sad eyes.
0:55:56 > 0:56:00- You saw.- Couldn't help it.
0:56:00 > 0:56:02- It was nothing.- It was Jay!
0:56:02 > 0:56:03It was a fucking mistake!
0:56:03 > 0:56:07When did you know that you loved her? When does anyone know?
0:56:07 > 0:56:10There's not much to celebrate.
0:56:10 > 0:56:12- It's your 30th!- Exactly. - Why don't we just do it at my flat?
0:56:12 > 0:56:14As long as it doesn't get too messy again.
0:56:14 > 0:56:18- Strolling down memory lane behind Sam's back...- I was working!
0:56:18 > 0:56:22- Why didn't he just like go for it with her?- Would she reciprocate?
0:56:22 > 0:56:24Well, you're the writer. Make it happen.