0:00:02 > 0:00:06'Dear Lilly and Joe, My hotel has a big garden.
0:00:06 > 0:00:10'I can see the sea from my room. Missing you already.
0:00:11 > 0:00:14'Dear Lilly and Joe, it's still raining,
0:00:14 > 0:00:17'but I am having a lovely time.'
0:00:17 > 0:00:21'I'm going on a boat trip on the sea. Love, Nan.'
0:00:21 > 0:00:25"Today, we are going to the beach."
0:00:25 > 0:00:29'PS the rain has stopped.'
0:00:40 > 0:00:41She's here.
0:00:43 > 0:00:45It's not Nana, it's a man.
0:00:45 > 0:00:47He's got Nan's suitcase.
0:00:47 > 0:00:50Yeah, that's because he's a taxi driver, he's helping Nan to...
0:00:50 > 0:00:54- Who the hell's he?- You said he was the taxi driver, Mummy.
0:00:54 > 0:00:59It's not Buckingham Palace, but it's home.
0:00:59 > 0:01:01I'm sure it will be splendid.
0:01:03 > 0:01:08- Nana!- Oh, darlings.
0:01:08 > 0:01:10We missed you so much!
0:01:10 > 0:01:12Surprise.
0:01:14 > 0:01:15Who is he?
0:01:15 > 0:01:17I've already explained.
0:01:17 > 0:01:20Holding his hand, what's all that's about? He's black.
0:01:20 > 0:01:22He's Asian.
0:01:22 > 0:01:24Well, he's a black Asian.
0:01:24 > 0:01:26Nepalese, actually.
0:01:26 > 0:01:29Oh, actually.
0:01:43 > 0:01:44Do you live in Devon?
0:01:44 > 0:01:46Uh, Devon, no.
0:01:48 > 0:01:52Ah, this must be you and your brother.
0:01:52 > 0:01:53That's Mike...
0:01:54 > 0:01:56..with our dad.
0:01:57 > 0:01:59Mum's husband.
0:02:01 > 0:02:04- Do you have any children? - One daughter.
0:02:04 > 0:02:06She lives in Australia.
0:02:06 > 0:02:12Oh, I've put some towels in the bedroom, so you can have a bath.
0:02:12 > 0:02:14- Thank you.- I'm going to make a cup of tea.
0:02:14 > 0:02:17Oh, right.
0:02:18 > 0:02:21Women who let strange men into their homes get murdered, you know?
0:02:21 > 0:02:23Yes.
0:02:23 > 0:02:25He could be anyone.
0:02:25 > 0:02:30- Are you listening to me? - Yeah, yeah, he could be anyone, he probably is someone.
0:02:30 > 0:02:32It's not funny.
0:02:32 > 0:02:39Look, he's interesting and good company, and I had a lovely time.
0:02:39 > 0:02:42Yeah, well, we all have a lovely time on holiday, don't we?
0:02:42 > 0:02:45- Then when it's over, it's over. - Is that right?
0:02:45 > 0:02:48Normal people bring back a straw donkey or a box of fudge.
0:02:48 > 0:02:50- Not a geriatric Asian. - That's enough.
0:02:50 > 0:02:52Is there...
0:02:52 > 0:02:53anything I can do?
0:02:53 > 0:02:58Yes, come outside, so as I can show you the garden.
0:02:58 > 0:03:00Lovely, thank you.
0:03:13 > 0:03:15You are not going to believe this.
0:03:19 > 0:03:20Where is he?
0:03:20 > 0:03:24She says she enjoys his company.
0:03:24 > 0:03:25It looks like.
0:03:25 > 0:03:27He's staying here.
0:03:29 > 0:03:33- We'll see. - I didn't expect them to be waiting.
0:03:33 > 0:03:35Well, why not?
0:03:35 > 0:03:37I think they miss you very much.
0:03:37 > 0:03:44Well, I know, but I wanted to show you the house, just the two of us, you know?
0:03:44 > 0:03:46Sort of make it special.
0:03:46 > 0:03:50Yes, but being with you is special.
0:03:55 > 0:03:58So, you met our mum on holiday?
0:04:00 > 0:04:01On a day trip.
0:04:03 > 0:04:06We were stroking the same donkey.
0:04:12 > 0:04:14'How old is he?'
0:04:14 > 0:04:19He's 56. He's an ex-soldier, 25 years in the army, all right?
0:04:19 > 0:04:21So you're just here for a little visit
0:04:21 > 0:04:23to extend your holiday?
0:04:24 > 0:04:27You should go to the lakes or Scotland!
0:04:27 > 0:04:30I don't think much of these turkey slices that you've bought.
0:04:30 > 0:04:32Yeah, well, at least I shop local.
0:04:34 > 0:04:36I was just saying to...Damar
0:04:36 > 0:04:39he should visit the Lake District before he goes home.
0:04:39 > 0:04:41Where is your home?
0:04:41 > 0:04:45- Nepal. Sometimes Australia. - What are your plans, Damar?
0:04:45 > 0:04:47He's, um, staying around here.
0:04:47 > 0:04:50- To do what?- Look for a job?
0:04:50 > 0:04:52Buy a house? Run for Mayor?
0:04:53 > 0:04:55Mum! Where is your wedding ring? Have you lost it?
0:04:55 > 0:04:58Oh, it's all right, it's quite safe.
0:04:58 > 0:05:02- I've got your dad's ring on a chain, look.- What?
0:05:02 > 0:05:05Dad put that ring on your finger.
0:05:05 > 0:05:07- What's going on?- Elizabeth.
0:05:07 > 0:05:09No, we're gonna have to...
0:05:09 > 0:05:15Look, the reason Damar's staying here, is because we're getting married.
0:05:15 > 0:05:17You what?
0:05:17 > 0:05:19Possibly before Christmas.
0:05:24 > 0:05:26Mike!
0:05:26 > 0:05:28- I know it's a shock. - A shock?!
0:05:28 > 0:05:30It's insane, that's what it is.
0:05:30 > 0:05:37Just because I'm Damar's wife, won't make me love your father any the less.
0:05:37 > 0:05:40No, just less enough to take his ring off your finger.
0:05:40 > 0:05:44Didn't it occur to you, that one day, I might meet another man?
0:05:44 > 0:05:46No! No, it didn't. Never.
0:05:46 > 0:05:49- Look, why get married? - Yeah, why rush into it?
0:05:50 > 0:05:51Let him get a flat.
0:05:51 > 0:05:55If you still feel the same in 20 years, then, then get married.
0:05:55 > 0:05:58I'll be dead by then!
0:05:58 > 0:06:03- Damar's visa runs out after Christmas, so we want to get married before that.- He's an illegal.
0:06:03 > 0:06:05No, no, he's here legally.
0:06:05 > 0:06:08- Until Christmas.- I'm not an illegal.
0:06:08 > 0:06:09Now, it makes sense.
0:06:09 > 0:06:12You want a quickie wedding so he can park himself in England.
0:06:12 > 0:06:14- It's me. I wanted to get married. - What?!
0:06:14 > 0:06:18Yeah! I would have married Damar the night I met him if I could have.
0:06:21 > 0:06:24I need to go outside for a cigarette.
0:06:26 > 0:06:29I care very deeply for your mother.
0:06:36 > 0:06:39You've gone off your head.
0:06:39 > 0:06:42It's a holiday romance, Mum. You've known him two weeks.
0:06:42 > 0:06:44- I know what I'm doing. - Do me a favour!
0:06:45 > 0:06:47You can't love him.
0:06:47 > 0:06:49So you're relationship experts, are you?
0:06:49 > 0:06:53With two marriages between you, both of them down the toilet.
0:06:53 > 0:06:57Has he got anything, Mum? A house, land, anything?
0:06:57 > 0:06:58- What does that matter? - It matters!
0:06:58 > 0:07:02If he's got himself four wives, halfway up some mountain.
0:07:02 > 0:07:05All right, his wife is dead, and he's got a family home in Nepal.
0:07:05 > 0:07:08That's what? A bunch of sticks on bamboo stilts, eh?
0:07:08 > 0:07:10This isn't about Damar, is it?
0:07:10 > 0:07:12You two would object to any man
0:07:12 > 0:07:16that I bring through that door because they aren't your father.
0:07:17 > 0:07:22Well, look I've prayed to God, that your father could come through that front door.
0:07:22 > 0:07:25I've often imagined that he did, but he can't.
0:07:28 > 0:07:34I know you love me and you want me to be happy, so please,
0:07:34 > 0:07:38please, try and accept Damar.
0:07:38 > 0:07:41Please, for my sake. I'm asking you.
0:07:45 > 0:07:47- Look, shall I do it? - No, I'm fine, Mum, thanks.
0:07:47 > 0:07:51- Are we ready now? - Yep, come on, kid, let's go.
0:07:51 > 0:07:53See you all soon, yeah?
0:07:56 > 0:07:58- Unbelievable.- I know. He's waving.
0:07:58 > 0:08:00Oh, he's got his arm around her...
0:08:00 > 0:08:02Just drive!
0:08:06 > 0:08:12Damar! That's my work telephone number and here's some keys.
0:08:12 > 0:08:14Look, that's the back door and that's the front door.
0:08:14 > 0:08:17Right, I'll be back about three. Bye.
0:08:17 > 0:08:18Bye, love.
0:08:40 > 0:08:42Move and I'll let him go.
0:08:42 > 0:08:45Stop this! I'm getting the bicycle.
0:08:45 > 0:08:47- Liz's bike!- I'm not stealing it!
0:08:47 > 0:08:49Look, Elizabeth is my friend.
0:08:49 > 0:08:51We've had trouble with asylum seekers before.
0:08:51 > 0:08:53MOBILE PHONE RINGS
0:08:53 > 0:08:56Oh, I think that's mine, do you mind if I take it?
0:08:56 > 0:08:58I am not an asylum seeker!
0:08:59 > 0:09:01Hello.
0:09:01 > 0:09:02Julie!
0:09:05 > 0:09:07- What man?- In your garage.
0:09:07 > 0:09:10Funny looking.
0:09:10 > 0:09:13- Is your name Damar?- Yes, Damar.
0:09:13 > 0:09:15We're getting married.
0:09:15 > 0:09:18He's got nerve, he even says you're getting married.
0:09:18 > 0:09:22Well, yes. Yes, we are.
0:09:22 > 0:09:24We're married as soon as we can.
0:09:26 > 0:09:28Oh, yeah, yeah, of course I'm having a party.
0:09:29 > 0:09:33Ah, thank you, love.
0:09:33 > 0:09:36Yeah, all right. Bye.
0:09:36 > 0:09:38Married?
0:09:38 > 0:09:42- I met him on holiday. I was going to tell you.- Oh, my God!
0:09:42 > 0:09:45That's fantastic. Where's he from?
0:09:45 > 0:09:47He's from Nepal. Near India.
0:09:47 > 0:09:50Oh, right! India.
0:09:50 > 0:09:53He was a Gurkha in the British Army.
0:09:53 > 0:09:57It won't change anything, I'll still be working here.
0:09:57 > 0:10:00- Congratulations!- Oh, thank you!
0:10:00 > 0:10:04This hotel does a wedding package.
0:10:04 > 0:10:07The service, meal and room.
0:10:07 > 0:10:10- All in one place? - Yeah, this is the brochure.
0:10:10 > 0:10:15I need to look for work. I will get a work permit.
0:10:15 > 0:10:17Of course, you will, my love.
0:10:20 > 0:10:21Hello, love.
0:10:23 > 0:10:26How was school then, all right?
0:10:26 > 0:10:28Oh, here comes trouble.
0:10:28 > 0:10:30- Have you got your reading bag?- Yes!
0:10:30 > 0:10:32And you've got your books in there?
0:10:32 > 0:10:33- Are you sure?- Yes!
0:10:33 > 0:10:36Lilly? What's the matter, love?
0:10:36 > 0:10:38Is something wrong?
0:10:38 > 0:10:40Come on, I'm talking to you.
0:10:40 > 0:10:45- They're all looking.- What? - They're all talking and looking.
0:10:45 > 0:10:47Well, good.
0:10:47 > 0:10:52If they're talking about me, then they're giving some other poor soul a break, aren't they?
0:10:53 > 0:10:55Eh?
0:10:55 > 0:10:57- Oh, hi, kids!- Oh, hello!
0:10:57 > 0:11:00I thought you were working.
0:11:00 > 0:11:02I was. I've just had a shower.
0:11:02 > 0:11:06Right, you two, get your coats off, wash your hands before tea.
0:11:06 > 0:11:09Off you go! Go on!
0:11:09 > 0:11:14Here, have a look at this.
0:11:17 > 0:11:20- What do you think?- It's a bit plain.
0:11:22 > 0:11:26Father O'Keefe has offered to do a blessing. But I'm not sure.
0:11:26 > 0:11:28Why? Wouldn't God approve?
0:11:28 > 0:11:32Damar doesn't even believe in God. Here, I'll have one of those.
0:11:32 > 0:11:33Get someone to make you a dress.
0:11:33 > 0:11:37It's too expensive.
0:11:37 > 0:11:38- Well, get Damar to pay.- Oh!
0:11:38 > 0:11:41He must have some money? Surely.
0:11:41 > 0:11:44He's on a British Serviceman's pension,
0:11:44 > 0:11:48which is less, than, a British, British Serviceman's pension.
0:11:48 > 0:11:50He has some savings, but...
0:11:51 > 0:11:53What little cash I've got's all tied up.
0:11:53 > 0:11:55Right.
0:11:56 > 0:11:59- Well, can he work?- It's complicated.
0:11:59 > 0:12:01Mum, it's not complicated. Can he work?
0:12:01 > 0:12:06If he gets citizenship, possibly.
0:12:06 > 0:12:09- Brown Sauce?- Yes.
0:12:09 > 0:12:12Well, when can he work?
0:12:12 > 0:12:15He doesn't fit into any of their categories.
0:12:15 > 0:12:17Oh, that's lovely!
0:12:17 > 0:12:22Damar's religion allows him to eat meat, but just not pork.
0:12:22 > 0:12:24Or beef.
0:12:24 > 0:12:27- Or chicken or duck.- When can he work?
0:12:29 > 0:12:32He eats a truck load of veg, though.
0:12:32 > 0:12:36- The price of them.- Mum. Mum.
0:12:37 > 0:12:38When can he work?
0:12:40 > 0:12:43When we've been married for three years.
0:12:43 > 0:12:46- Definitely?- No.
0:12:46 > 0:12:48Mum, you can't keep the both of you.
0:12:49 > 0:12:51I love him, Alice.
0:12:51 > 0:12:54Excuse me.
0:12:54 > 0:12:56- Yes, mate?- Are these your cars?
0:12:56 > 0:12:59Oh, yes, all quality motors.
0:12:59 > 0:13:03I know about cars. You see I'm looking for work, I fix engines.
0:13:03 > 0:13:05I don't fix engines. I sell them.
0:13:05 > 0:13:07- Where are you from?- Nepal.
0:13:07 > 0:13:10- Where's Nepal.- Near Tibet.
0:13:10 > 0:13:12Well, where's Tibet?
0:13:12 > 0:13:14- Near India.- India.
0:13:14 > 0:13:16Right. Have you got a work visa?
0:13:16 > 0:13:19- Not yet.- Good. Follow me.
0:13:19 > 0:13:22- Can you clean cars?- I am a soldier.
0:13:22 > 0:13:25- Gurkha.- A what? A Gurkha?
0:13:28 > 0:13:31Can you clean cars, Gurkha?
0:13:31 > 0:13:33You have to smile and be polite.
0:13:33 > 0:13:36The big cars like all that.
0:13:36 > 0:13:39"Yes, sir, no, sir, three bags full, sir."
0:13:39 > 0:13:43- OK.- What do you mean, "OK"?
0:13:43 > 0:13:45Say it.
0:13:46 > 0:13:49- I am polite.- No.
0:13:49 > 0:13:53Say, "Yes, sir, no, sir, three bags full, sir."
0:13:53 > 0:13:56Yes, sir, no, sir...
0:13:58 > 0:14:00..three bags full, sir.
0:14:02 > 0:14:05- £3.50 an hour.- £3.50?!
0:14:05 > 0:14:06Well, that's the offer.
0:14:08 > 0:14:09No.
0:14:13 > 0:14:17It's physical, you see, you're probably too old.
0:14:21 > 0:14:24£3.50 an hour!
0:14:24 > 0:14:28I'd like to tell him what to do with his jet wash.
0:14:28 > 0:14:30I said no.
0:14:30 > 0:14:31Good.
0:14:34 > 0:14:37Is this how you thought it would be?
0:14:37 > 0:14:39Here?
0:14:39 > 0:14:41This house?
0:14:41 > 0:14:43Me?
0:14:44 > 0:14:48I didn't expect... Nepal, Australia.
0:14:48 > 0:14:52Here, it's more closed in.
0:14:54 > 0:14:56I've got an idea.
0:14:58 > 0:15:01I'm off on the 15th.
0:15:01 > 0:15:06I'm going to take you to Aberystwyth.
0:15:06 > 0:15:10It's like the Himalayas with caravans.
0:15:12 > 0:15:16< All right, Mum, just popped round.
0:15:16 > 0:15:18I brought some washing over.
0:15:18 > 0:15:20- Can you do my jeans tonight? - It's nine o'clock.
0:15:20 > 0:15:23You couldn't lend us some money, could you, Mum?
0:15:23 > 0:15:25- Just until I get paid. I'm skint. - How much?
0:15:25 > 0:15:26I was thinking about 150.
0:15:26 > 0:15:28Think again.
0:15:28 > 0:15:32- Well, 50 then?- All right, but I want it back, Michael.
0:15:32 > 0:15:35I promise. Is it all right if I take these biccies?
0:15:35 > 0:15:40- I can cook you something. - No, I can't stop, I only nipped round with the washing.
0:15:40 > 0:15:42And to see you.
0:15:42 > 0:15:44The gherkin still here, is he?
0:15:44 > 0:15:46Don't call him that.
0:15:46 > 0:15:47I'm only joking.
0:15:47 > 0:15:50So what did he do when he left the army? Engineering?
0:15:50 > 0:15:54- Why?- I'm just taking an interest, like you wanted.
0:15:56 > 0:15:59What's my dad doing there?
0:15:59 > 0:16:02I fancied a change, I've been switching things round a bit.
0:16:02 > 0:16:05You've moved him from the living room to the hall.
0:16:05 > 0:16:06Where's next, the front lawn?
0:16:06 > 0:16:08Don't be silly. I like that picture.
0:16:11 > 0:16:15Oh, aye, lights down dim, TV off. What's the matter?
0:16:15 > 0:16:17Didn't you want Dad watching you getting cosy with him?
0:16:17 > 0:16:21I didn't stop being a woman the day I buried your dad.
0:16:28 > 0:16:30It's not his fault.
0:16:30 > 0:16:33He's sensitive, he always has been.
0:16:33 > 0:16:37I know he should have a washing machine, but I've always done it, you see...
0:16:37 > 0:16:39It's time to stop doing it.
0:16:39 > 0:16:41To start thinking about you.
0:16:46 > 0:16:47The city council...
0:16:49 > 0:16:51Damar!
0:16:52 > 0:16:56They've stopped my council tax benefit.
0:16:56 > 0:17:00- What do you mean? - Well, it's a tax everybody pays.
0:17:00 > 0:17:03If you live alone, they knock a bit off.
0:17:03 > 0:17:04Now, you have to pay more?
0:17:04 > 0:17:08Because of me, because I live here?
0:17:08 > 0:17:10Somebody's bubbled me.
0:17:10 > 0:17:13Told them that you're living here.
0:17:13 > 0:17:15But, Elizabeth, I'm not working.
0:17:15 > 0:17:18Oh, they don't give a monkeys. Oh, Lord.
0:17:33 > 0:17:35- Hi, Mum.- Oh, hello!
0:17:35 > 0:17:38I'm just going into town to get a dress.
0:17:38 > 0:17:40Really?
0:17:40 > 0:17:43- Oh, they're gorgeous!- They'd be lovely in your mum's bouquet.
0:17:45 > 0:17:48It's for Jill's hen party, on the 15th.
0:17:51 > 0:17:55- Oh, where are the kids going? - I thought you could have them.
0:17:55 > 0:17:58I'm sorry. I'm going away that weekend.
0:17:58 > 0:17:59You can't.
0:18:00 > 0:18:02I'm going to the Isle of Man.
0:18:02 > 0:18:04It's all booked, everything.
0:18:04 > 0:18:06You should have asked me.
0:18:06 > 0:18:08I've never had to ask you before.
0:18:08 > 0:18:11Mum, there's a whole gang of us going.
0:18:12 > 0:18:14I'm sorry.
0:18:38 > 0:18:40It's Momo,
0:18:40 > 0:18:43fried vegetables and meat dumplings.
0:18:43 > 0:18:47- Please, have some.- No, I can't, I'm going to see my little girl.
0:18:47 > 0:18:49I see her on Wednesdays and Sundays.
0:18:51 > 0:18:53Elizabeth ironed these.
0:18:57 > 0:19:00It's difficult, to be a father.
0:19:00 > 0:19:04- Not for me, I love it. - When they start growing up,
0:19:04 > 0:19:07when they start seeing men.
0:19:07 > 0:19:12- I'm a long way off that. - No matter how much you like the man, he's still a stranger.
0:19:12 > 0:19:16Someone you love is now being intimate with someone else.
0:19:16 > 0:19:17Well, like I said,
0:19:17 > 0:19:19my little girl's only four.
0:19:19 > 0:19:24You want to protect them, you have to let them go.
0:19:24 > 0:19:29Maybe you feel the same when your mother is in a new relationship.
0:19:30 > 0:19:32No, it doesn't feel the same.
0:19:34 > 0:19:37- I've got to go. - You have a key to this house?
0:19:37 > 0:19:41No, I just broke in through the window.
0:19:41 > 0:19:43You wouldn't want to come in at a bad time.
0:19:43 > 0:19:45An intimate time.
0:19:45 > 0:19:47Are you asking me for my key?
0:19:47 > 0:19:49I want you to respect our home.
0:19:49 > 0:19:51You what?
0:19:51 > 0:19:53You've been here for two seconds.
0:19:53 > 0:19:56This isn't your home. 21 years I've lived in this house.
0:19:56 > 0:19:57I know this is difficult.
0:19:57 > 0:20:00Do they even have keys where you come from?
0:20:00 > 0:20:02We have children, families.
0:20:07 > 0:20:09I was 13 when he died.
0:20:09 > 0:20:10I've looked after her ever since.
0:20:10 > 0:20:13If she wants my key back, she can ask for it herself.
0:20:17 > 0:20:21Dirty rotten tricks, they don't give you any warning.
0:20:23 > 0:20:25Julie, what's happened?
0:20:25 > 0:20:27They're laying us off.
0:20:27 > 0:20:29They've just finished us.
0:20:29 > 0:20:31The three of us,
0:20:31 > 0:20:33well, the English three.
0:20:33 > 0:20:38- You've lost your job?- I've had it snatched from under me nose by them.
0:20:38 > 0:20:42Bulgarian, Romanian, Latvian, bloody God knows who.
0:20:42 > 0:20:43But they work for less.
0:20:43 > 0:20:47They work shifts, they work the weekends, bank holidays.
0:20:47 > 0:20:52They haven't got their family here, have they? Oh, bits of kids, living together.
0:20:52 > 0:20:54But they haven't got the bills that we have.
0:20:54 > 0:20:59There must be something you can do? Isn't there a union?
0:20:59 > 0:21:01It's an old people's home, Liz.
0:21:01 > 0:21:03An English old people's home.
0:21:03 > 0:21:06They don't just want their backsides wiped for them,
0:21:06 > 0:21:10they want someone to talk to them, you know, share a little laugh.
0:21:10 > 0:21:12How can them foreign girls do that, eh?
0:21:12 > 0:21:13I'll put the kettle on.
0:21:15 > 0:21:1612 years I've worked there.
0:21:19 > 0:21:21And d'you know the worst thing?
0:21:21 > 0:21:25Having to go back and say goodbye.
0:21:25 > 0:21:29Come on, come and have a cup of tea, Jules.
0:21:29 > 0:21:30Come on.
0:21:30 > 0:21:32Damar!
0:21:32 > 0:21:38Love, it's the middle of the night!
0:21:38 > 0:21:41I'm on Nepal time.
0:21:41 > 0:21:42I wanted a cigarette.
0:21:47 > 0:21:53It's my religion to try to make sense of things.
0:21:55 > 0:21:56Even the stars,
0:21:56 > 0:21:59the planets...
0:22:01 > 0:22:04..I was thinking about your son,
0:22:04 > 0:22:06about my father.
0:22:06 > 0:22:08Mike misses Joe.
0:22:08 > 0:22:12He's angry with the world because his dad died young.
0:22:13 > 0:22:19My father was a Gurkha in the Queen Elizabeth's Own Rifles.
0:22:19 > 0:22:24He had his head cut off when he was 34.
0:22:24 > 0:22:25Oh, God!
0:22:27 > 0:22:33Still mothers want their sons to be Gurkhas. It makes them feel proud.
0:22:33 > 0:22:36Also, they can send money home.
0:22:40 > 0:22:44- You know, in Nepal, we have a caste system.- Mmm.
0:22:45 > 0:22:47I travel...
0:22:47 > 0:22:52I see all countries have inequality, their own caste system.
0:22:52 > 0:22:57Money, colour, skin, religion.
0:22:57 > 0:23:00Yeah, I suppose so.
0:23:00 > 0:23:02I fight the Argentineans.
0:23:04 > 0:23:07But what my father did, that was something else.
0:23:07 > 0:23:10My mother was so proud.
0:23:10 > 0:23:12He defended an empire.
0:23:13 > 0:23:16Now, the word "empire" is an embarrassment here.
0:23:16 > 0:23:18It makes me feel so sad.
0:23:20 > 0:23:21And, like your son,
0:23:23 > 0:23:26I'm very angry that my father died young.
0:23:26 > 0:23:27I'm sorry.
0:23:31 > 0:23:34And still, there aren't enough British soldiers.
0:23:34 > 0:23:38So we are required, but we are not wanted here.
0:23:40 > 0:23:42If there was a caste system here,
0:23:42 > 0:23:45soldiers would be a low caste and foreign soldiers... the bottom.
0:23:45 > 0:23:49No, that's not true.
0:23:49 > 0:23:50Yes, I think it is.
0:23:53 > 0:23:59My sister moved to Spain, it was her big dream.
0:23:59 > 0:24:02She came home three months later.
0:24:04 > 0:24:08Places, like people, don't live up to what we expect.
0:24:10 > 0:24:13Mind you, I'm proud to live here.
0:24:17 > 0:24:19- Really?- Yeah.
0:24:19 > 0:24:21For all its faults,
0:24:21 > 0:24:25I wouldn't want to live anywhere else.
0:24:40 > 0:24:42THEY CLAP AND CHEER
0:24:44 > 0:24:47Your nan's made this cake. She's a very clever lady.
0:24:49 > 0:24:52- Be careful. - I'll be out in the garden.
0:24:52 > 0:24:54Do you like that cake?
0:24:54 > 0:24:58- Right put them on there, I'll follow you.- Be careful, kids!
0:25:03 > 0:25:05Are you all right to pick them up tomorrow afternoon?
0:25:05 > 0:25:10Yes, but, after next week, I'm going to be doing more hours.
0:25:10 > 0:25:14I've decided to work four days in the shop. Look at all this mess.
0:25:14 > 0:25:16What am I supposed to do?
0:25:16 > 0:25:19Well, I only decided myself yesterday.
0:25:19 > 0:25:21I've given you a week's notice.
0:25:21 > 0:25:25That's good of you(!) Who's supposed to take them to school, look after them?
0:25:25 > 0:25:27You'll have to find someone. Sort it out.
0:25:27 > 0:25:30- Like I did, when you two were little. - I'll wash up.
0:25:30 > 0:25:34No, that's all right, that's all right, it's women's work, you go and have a smoke.
0:25:37 > 0:25:38Women's work?
0:25:38 > 0:25:43- Have I just been transported back into the 1950s?- Give him a break.
0:25:43 > 0:25:45He's doing his best.
0:25:45 > 0:25:47That's part of his culture, is it? Women being subservient.
0:25:47 > 0:25:49Don't talk stupid!
0:25:49 > 0:25:52Damar made all these sandwiches and all the jellies!
0:25:52 > 0:25:54So you're waiting on him and keeping him?
0:25:54 > 0:25:56- That's not fair!- Fair?
0:25:56 > 0:25:59I've done nothing and I'm being punished!
0:25:59 > 0:26:03- What?!- You were OK for money before him, eating like a horse, leaving the heating on.
0:26:03 > 0:26:07- If you work more hours, me and the kids suffer.- Nobody's suffering!
0:26:07 > 0:26:10The kids love having Damar around. He's good with them.
0:26:10 > 0:26:12He takes them to the park. They like him.
0:26:12 > 0:26:15They shouldn't like him. They shouldn't like him
0:26:15 > 0:26:18or play with him, or go anywhere with him! Not ever.
0:26:18 > 0:26:23Eh, eh, eh! No smoking near the kids, don't smoke near them.
0:26:28 > 0:26:31No. Don't go in! We want you to stay out.
0:26:31 > 0:26:34Happy families, Mum, it's never going to work.
0:26:34 > 0:26:36And I'm not going to pretend.
0:26:36 > 0:26:38You! Everything is always about you!
0:26:38 > 0:26:40I'm not the one being selfish!
0:26:40 > 0:26:43You have dropped me right in it! I'll have to pay for a child minder!
0:26:43 > 0:26:44Is that what you want?!
0:26:44 > 0:26:46A stranger looking after your grandchildren?
0:26:46 > 0:26:48Listen, Alice!
0:26:48 > 0:26:52If you can pay a stranger, you should pay your mother.
0:26:52 > 0:26:56- Listen, illegal, they're her grandchildren.- Don't start on him.
0:26:56 > 0:26:59It's his problem. And we were OK before he came along.
0:26:59 > 0:27:01Dad would be turning in his grave!
0:27:01 > 0:27:04- He'd be ashamed of you. - Do you think he'd be proud of you?
0:27:04 > 0:27:07Throwing your family away, for some destitute foreigner?
0:27:07 > 0:27:11- You know nothing!- I know that if you marry him, everything changes!
0:27:11 > 0:27:13Come on, kids, get your stuff together.
0:27:13 > 0:27:16- Party's over. - God, you must be desperate.
0:27:16 > 0:27:19- Shut up.- Pretty damn desperate.
0:27:19 > 0:27:21I said shut up!
0:27:21 > 0:27:26If you marry him, my kids will get nothing when you die!
0:27:26 > 0:27:29- That's not true.- If you marry him, what'll happen to my dad?- What?
0:27:29 > 0:27:35When you die? Will you cast him aside like his ring and his photo?
0:27:35 > 0:27:39If you marry him, everything changes!
0:27:40 > 0:27:41Alice.
0:27:42 > 0:27:45Here's that 50 quid I owe you. I'll give it to him, shall I?
0:27:45 > 0:27:48Since he seems to take all your money off you.
0:27:48 > 0:27:52And you better have this back as he's calling all the shots.
0:27:52 > 0:27:53Well, go on, take it!
0:27:54 > 0:27:56This is me letting go.
0:28:33 > 0:28:36Alice?
0:28:36 > 0:28:38It's Mum.
0:28:38 > 0:28:42I've got Lilly's scooter here and I thought she might be wanting it.
0:28:45 > 0:28:50Alice, please, pick up the phone.
0:28:50 > 0:28:52VACUUM HUMS
0:28:52 > 0:28:54Oi! Stop!
0:28:54 > 0:28:57- One minute.- No, no. Stop now.
0:28:57 > 0:28:58Go on, go home.
0:28:58 > 0:29:01- You've been blown up.- What?
0:29:01 > 0:29:05Blown up, bubbled, mate, shopped to the immigration for working.
0:29:05 > 0:29:07My...wages, my money.
0:29:07 > 0:29:10- No chance.- I've worked five hours.
0:29:10 > 0:29:14So? I don't pay half shifts. Now go.
0:29:14 > 0:29:15'I've got their paddling pool.
0:29:15 > 0:29:18'I know it's the middle of winter...
0:29:19 > 0:29:23'Alice, please! Don't stop me seeing the kids!
0:29:25 > 0:29:28'It's ripping my heart out.'
0:29:28 > 0:29:34SOBS: If you don't want to speak to me,
0:29:34 > 0:29:37then just let the kids ring me,
0:29:37 > 0:29:43so that I can hear their voices and tell them that I love them,
0:29:43 > 0:29:44and I love their mum, as well.
0:29:48 > 0:29:51Mum. Mum, it's me.
0:29:51 > 0:29:52Mum?
0:29:52 > 0:29:57I've brought them up since they were tiny babies.
0:29:58 > 0:30:02This is not how you thought it would be.
0:30:02 > 0:30:03Me being here?
0:30:06 > 0:30:08You asked me this question.
0:30:08 > 0:30:10No, I shouldn't have, it's a rubbish question.
0:30:10 > 0:30:17I thought they'd be happy because I'm happy.
0:30:25 > 0:30:26You don't look happy.
0:30:26 > 0:30:30Living alone, eating alone.
0:30:30 > 0:30:33Getting selfish,
0:30:33 > 0:30:36forgetting to compromise.
0:30:36 > 0:30:39That's not living!
0:30:39 > 0:30:42They're young.
0:30:42 > 0:30:45Sharing a meal,
0:30:45 > 0:30:47a sunset...
0:30:49 > 0:30:50..your bed.
0:30:54 > 0:30:57SHE CRIES
0:31:10 > 0:31:12I can't take these.
0:31:12 > 0:31:14Oh, don't be silly, I got them from the shop.
0:31:14 > 0:31:17- I got a discount.- Take them back.
0:31:17 > 0:31:20Julie, hold on. I bought them for you.
0:31:20 > 0:31:23You shouldn't have.
0:31:23 > 0:31:25- I had to tell them.- Tell who what?
0:31:25 > 0:31:27The council tax people.
0:31:27 > 0:31:31- About him living here. - Why? Why would you do that?
0:31:31 > 0:31:34Hold on, Julie.
0:31:34 > 0:31:37It wasn't Damar who stole your job.
0:31:37 > 0:31:39But he's working though, isn't he?
0:31:39 > 0:31:42And I rang them up as well, the whistle blower number.
0:31:42 > 0:31:45I told them about your boyfriend who cleans cars.
0:31:45 > 0:31:49He's a refugee, an immigrant, he shouldn't be working.
0:31:49 > 0:31:51No, Damar is not a refugee!
0:31:51 > 0:31:53He didn't come here under a lorry.
0:31:53 > 0:31:56I met him in Torquay, on holiday.
0:31:58 > 0:31:59He was a Gurkha, for God's sake.
0:31:59 > 0:32:03He was a soldier in our army.
0:32:03 > 0:32:06- He was a mercenary, he was paid to kill.- He fought for us.
0:32:06 > 0:32:08Well, I didn't ask him to fight for me!
0:32:08 > 0:32:11Julie, we're getting married.
0:32:11 > 0:32:13It's the NHS they come here for,
0:32:13 > 0:32:16free health care, that's why he's marrying you.
0:32:16 > 0:32:18Oh, why didn't I think of that?
0:32:18 > 0:32:20It's not me he wants, it's a plastic hip.
0:32:25 > 0:32:27There we go.
0:32:27 > 0:32:29Bye-bye.
0:32:29 > 0:32:33So, does he have a prayer mat and light candles and all that?
0:32:33 > 0:32:36No, that's Muslim! He's a Hindu.
0:32:37 > 0:32:40Ah, Mrs Williams. It's Joe's teacher here, Mr Hall.
0:32:40 > 0:32:43MOBILE PHONE RINGS Oh, sorry.
0:32:46 > 0:32:48Hello? Alice!
0:32:48 > 0:32:53'I'm afraid Joe didn't come back to afternoon registration.'
0:32:55 > 0:32:58No, no, he's not with me, why would he be?
0:32:58 > 0:33:01'Could you call us, please, as soon as you can?
0:33:05 > 0:33:07'We're searching the grounds.'
0:33:09 > 0:33:11Our Joe's gone missing.
0:33:12 > 0:33:14Joe. Joe.
0:33:14 > 0:33:17Joe! Oh, please, God, no...
0:33:17 > 0:33:19MOBILE PHONE RINGS
0:33:21 > 0:33:23Well, where are you?!
0:33:23 > 0:33:25All right, well, stay there!
0:33:32 > 0:33:33- Alice!- Oh, Mum!
0:33:33 > 0:33:35He was sent outside to get his coat.
0:33:35 > 0:33:37They don't know how he got out or where he is.
0:33:37 > 0:33:40- The school's rang the police. - Where's Lilly?
0:33:40 > 0:33:43She's gone to my house with Mike in case he's goes home.
0:33:43 > 0:33:45He'd go with anybody, Mum, he'd go with anyone...
0:33:45 > 0:33:48All right. We'll find him. OK. Now, come on.
0:33:48 > 0:33:49MOBILE PHONE RINGS
0:33:53 > 0:33:55Damar! Joe's missing...
0:33:58 > 0:33:59Is he all right?
0:33:59 > 0:34:02Oh! Joe's with Damar.
0:34:02 > 0:34:03Whoa!
0:34:03 > 0:34:05I nearly got you!
0:34:05 > 0:34:07- You ready?- Yeah.
0:34:07 > 0:34:10- Joe!- Mum! Nan!
0:34:10 > 0:34:15Come here! What did you do that for, eh?! You scared your mummy!
0:34:15 > 0:34:17Joseph wanted to see his Nan.
0:34:17 > 0:34:19And his Nana wanted to see him too.
0:34:19 > 0:34:22Don't you ever do that again, OK?
0:34:22 > 0:34:25Never leave school without your mummy, OK?
0:34:25 > 0:34:27Good boy, good boy.
0:34:29 > 0:34:32The things that go through your mind.
0:34:33 > 0:34:37And the fear... Oh, my God.
0:34:39 > 0:34:43The whole of my insides froze.
0:34:45 > 0:34:48Children don't understand why adults argue.
0:34:50 > 0:34:52Alice said that.
0:34:52 > 0:34:55She's coming to the registry office.
0:34:57 > 0:35:01I think we should all go for a meal afterwards.
0:35:01 > 0:35:03And Michael?
0:35:06 > 0:35:07Oh, he'll come around.
0:36:01 > 0:36:06Say, yes, sir, no, sir, three bags full, sir
0:36:17 > 0:36:20Gurkha.
0:37:23 > 0:37:26Mum?
0:37:26 > 0:37:28I've made you a drink.
0:37:36 > 0:37:38Can I get you anything else?
0:38:07 > 0:38:09I don't know what to say, Mum.
0:38:12 > 0:38:15What do you want me to say?
0:38:15 > 0:38:18That I'm sorry he's gone? Cos I'm not.
0:38:18 > 0:38:20That I'm sorry you're upset? Of course I am.
0:38:30 > 0:38:33It was too hard.
0:38:33 > 0:38:35Another man around here.
0:38:39 > 0:38:41I always thought that when I grew up...
0:38:43 > 0:38:46..into this big successful man, it'd be me looking after you.
0:38:49 > 0:38:51I know.
0:38:52 > 0:38:54It's not really worked out like that, has it?
0:38:57 > 0:38:59Not really grown up.
0:39:01 > 0:39:05And then when he came along it was like you didn't need me.
0:39:08 > 0:39:10I did try, Mum.
0:39:11 > 0:39:13No.
0:39:13 > 0:39:16You did not try.
0:39:18 > 0:39:21I told you, I told you both.
0:39:21 > 0:39:26I would have given anything to have Joseph back.
0:39:28 > 0:39:31We didn't even get to say goodbye.
0:39:32 > 0:39:34Do you know how hard that is?
0:39:39 > 0:39:42And then, after all those years of being alone...
0:39:44 > 0:39:46..I found the next best thing.
0:39:48 > 0:39:52Someone who every time he came through that door made me smile.
0:39:55 > 0:39:57Made my life worth living.
0:40:01 > 0:40:04And now he's gone, as well.
0:40:08 > 0:40:10You should do something.
0:40:10 > 0:40:13- I think I'll go and lie down.- Mum.
0:40:13 > 0:40:14How much money have you got?
0:40:14 > 0:40:19- Nothing.- Tied up. You said that you had some tied up.
0:40:19 > 0:40:22No, it's rainy day money.
0:40:22 > 0:40:24It is raining, Mum.
0:40:24 > 0:40:26It's bucketing down.
0:40:30 > 0:40:31You should use it...
0:40:33 > 0:40:36..and go and find him.
0:40:39 > 0:40:41Put the house up for sale.
0:40:41 > 0:40:43- What?- Why?
0:40:43 > 0:40:46In case I don't find Damar.
0:40:48 > 0:40:50Probably won't find him.
0:40:52 > 0:40:55And if I don't, I'm not coming back here.
0:40:57 > 0:40:59Be on my own again.
0:41:01 > 0:41:02I can't.
0:41:07 > 0:41:12'I'm proud to live here, for all its faults.
0:41:12 > 0:41:15'I wouldn't want to live anywhere else.
0:41:15 > 0:41:19'I want you to respect our home.
0:41:19 > 0:41:21'You what?
0:41:21 > 0:41:24'You've been here for two seconds, this isn't your home.
0:41:24 > 0:41:27'21 years I've lived in this house!
0:41:27 > 0:41:30'Listen, illegal, they're her grandchildren!
0:41:30 > 0:41:33'Put the house up for sale,
0:41:33 > 0:41:34'in case I don't find Damar.
0:41:37 > 0:41:39'And if I don't, I'm not coming back here.'
0:41:45 > 0:41:52'Dear Lilly and Joe, Singapore has the most fantastic zoo...
0:41:52 > 0:41:56'Dear Lilly and Joe, we are in Hong Kong...
0:41:56 > 0:42:00'Dear Joe and Lilly, I'll tell you a secret,
0:42:00 > 0:42:04'I don't want it to ever rain again.
0:42:04 > 0:42:05'Love Nan.'
0:42:14 > 0:42:16Here we are.
0:42:16 > 0:42:17OK?
0:42:19 > 0:42:21Wait a minute.
0:42:21 > 0:42:24Oh, I know, that stupid British custom.
0:42:24 > 0:42:27No, no.
0:42:27 > 0:42:29Here, give us a hand.
0:42:29 > 0:42:31THEY GRUNT
0:42:33 > 0:42:38OK. Now, the stupid British custom!
0:42:38 > 0:42:40Come on!
0:42:44 > 0:42:45- ALL:- Surprise!
0:42:45 > 0:42:48Oh! Oh!
0:42:48 > 0:42:50Look at that!
0:43:00 > 0:43:02# It's time
0:43:02 > 0:43:07# Time for moving on
0:43:12 > 0:43:16# Maybe if I'd had a better plan
0:43:17 > 0:43:21# Maybe I would not be where I am
0:43:21 > 0:43:25# Maybe I'll find the courage and the strength
0:43:25 > 0:43:28# To make a stand
0:43:30 > 0:43:34# Moving on... #
0:43:34 > 0:43:36Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:43:36 > 0:43:39E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk