Sauce for the Goose

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0:00:24 > 0:00:28What if he's not dead? What if he wakes up?

0:00:41 > 0:00:44He's took the lock off!

0:00:53 > 0:00:55Argh!

0:00:58 > 0:01:04He's alive! Please, please. He's alive!

0:01:04 > 0:01:07I came... I came to fix the computer.

0:01:07 > 0:01:11Your daughter, she let me in. You've got it wrong!

0:01:11 > 0:01:13CRIES OF PAIN

0:02:01 > 0:02:03Call an ambulance!

0:02:03 > 0:02:05KNOCK ON DOOR

0:02:05 > 0:02:06I could be dying here!

0:02:18 > 0:02:20You've only got yourself to blame.

0:02:20 > 0:02:23If you'd turned up when you said, this wouldn't have happened.

0:02:23 > 0:02:28If you'd been honest, I'd have had time to get someone else and you said you'd experience with old people.

0:02:33 > 0:02:35CAR OUTSIDE That sounds like her now.

0:02:49 > 0:02:53Did you say it's his own fault, not to make appointments he can't keep?

0:02:53 > 0:02:56Yeah. How's Mum? It never even happened.

0:02:56 > 0:02:59Look, I know you think I'm being harsh...

0:02:59 > 0:03:03but bedside vigils, tea and sympathy? He'll sense weakness!

0:03:03 > 0:03:07Next thing, you're hearing from his solicitor. When's the locksmith due?

0:03:07 > 0:03:09I've lost count of the messages I've left.

0:03:09 > 0:03:13Tradesmen are all the same! Look at the nightmare over my conservatory!

0:03:13 > 0:03:17Mum can't stay here tonight if that door isn't fixed. She wanders.

0:03:17 > 0:03:22Give it ten more minutes. If they still haven't phoned, there must be plenty more in the book.

0:03:22 > 0:03:25I've picked up all the mess, by the way. Yeah, thanks.

0:03:25 > 0:03:28It's a pleasure. Look, I've got to fly.

0:03:28 > 0:03:31I have to pick Kirsty up from piano then drop Jodie off at jujitsu.

0:03:31 > 0:03:33I'll call you tomorrow.

0:03:33 > 0:03:36I swear to God, I'm on the verge of a nervous breakdown!

0:03:36 > 0:03:38Bye, Mum!

0:03:45 > 0:03:49Where've you been? You've just missed our Linda.

0:03:49 > 0:03:51Oh, that's a pity.

0:03:54 > 0:03:56Did she make you anything to eat, by any chance?

0:03:56 > 0:03:58She wouldn't see me starve.

0:03:58 > 0:04:01Oh, I know.

0:04:01 > 0:04:05But are you hungry? Yeah. Where've you been?

0:04:05 > 0:04:08To the library, there's a problem with the computer.

0:04:08 > 0:04:11They're too warm! They make my feet sweat.

0:04:11 > 0:04:14Better warm and sweaty than cut to ribbons.

0:04:14 > 0:04:16There's broken glass in the hall. I'm not in the hall.

0:04:16 > 0:04:20I know, but until I've had the chance to clear it up... Leave me alone!

0:04:20 > 0:04:24SHE SIGHS: OK, OK. You win. But stay in here.

0:04:26 > 0:04:30Where've you been? To the library, talking to Chris.

0:04:32 > 0:04:34Oh, I remember now.

0:04:35 > 0:04:39That was a bad idea. Yeah, I know. I'm sorry.

0:04:39 > 0:04:42You're meant to keep the noise down in a library.

0:04:43 > 0:04:46We were talking over the computer.

0:04:47 > 0:04:49He's in Colombia.

0:04:50 > 0:04:52Colombia?

0:04:55 > 0:04:59Isn't it dangerous? It's not like it used to be -

0:04:59 > 0:05:03all death squads and drug cartels - and Chris can look after himself.

0:05:03 > 0:05:06And anyway, what can you do? Burn his passport?

0:05:06 > 0:05:10What's wrong with Magaluf? He's got wider horizons, Mum.

0:05:10 > 0:05:13And good luck to him. I couldn't be prouder.

0:05:13 > 0:05:15Anyway, he says he's moving on next week, thank God.

0:05:15 > 0:05:19Where are you going? To get my slippers, there's a draught!

0:05:19 > 0:05:21Mind your feet! There's glass on the floor.

0:05:21 > 0:05:23No wonder! The front door's open.

0:05:23 > 0:05:26Ah, hello, yes. I need a new lock fitted to my door...

0:05:26 > 0:05:28Ow! Er...

0:05:28 > 0:05:32Glass on the floor, you said! Nothing about splinters!

0:05:32 > 0:05:35I'm sorry, I'll call you back.

0:05:35 > 0:05:37Agh! That's me skin! Sorry. Tweeze the wood!

0:05:37 > 0:05:41If you'd stay still a minute! Ow! It's like you're digging for oil!

0:05:41 > 0:05:45Do you want it to go septic? You know I'm on pills to thin my blood.

0:05:45 > 0:05:49You're trying to bleed me dry! Bleed me dry and steal my money!

0:05:49 > 0:05:51I'm calling Lynne, I don't have to put up with this!

0:05:54 > 0:05:57SHE SIGHS

0:06:02 > 0:06:06Oh, God, do I need that. What a nightmare of a day!

0:06:06 > 0:06:09I could be lying here now the daughter of a murderer.

0:06:09 > 0:06:13No, no, no. Worst-case scenario, manslaughter maybe.

0:06:13 > 0:06:17Diminished responsibility carries a lot of weight these days.

0:06:17 > 0:06:21It'll always be a mystery to me, why didn't she just take her to the library with her?

0:06:21 > 0:06:25She could've come here and used our computer. She only had to ask.

0:06:25 > 0:06:28The place is a building site. The office isn't.

0:06:28 > 0:06:32The library's round the corner and she's not one to reach out for help.

0:06:32 > 0:06:36And besides, these are unfamiliar surroundings. Mum doesn't like them.

0:06:36 > 0:06:39We should invite them both over, for dinner some time.

0:06:39 > 0:06:41Yeah, when we've settled in.

0:06:42 > 0:06:45I don't think you realise how much she's deteriorated.

0:06:45 > 0:06:47It won't be long before even Anne can't cope.

0:06:47 > 0:06:52Two and a half hours, I was on the edge of a nervous breakdown. How's Chris, out of Colombia yet?

0:06:52 > 0:06:55All the trauma, I forgot to ask.

0:06:55 > 0:06:58You'd better go or Jodie'll be late for jujitsu.

0:07:00 > 0:07:03SHE SIGHS

0:07:45 > 0:07:47Night, love. Night, Mum.

0:08:24 > 0:08:26DOORBELL RINGS

0:08:27 > 0:08:29Hold on, Mum.

0:08:52 > 0:08:56Hello. I left my stuff here.

0:08:56 > 0:09:01And your car. Yeah, can't drive, but I'll get someone to pick it up.

0:09:01 > 0:09:05It's not in your way, is it? Oh, no. No, no.

0:09:06 > 0:09:08You'd better step in.

0:09:16 > 0:09:18How are you?

0:09:18 > 0:09:23Skull fracture, broken collar bone, few ribs, concussion.

0:09:23 > 0:09:27All the usual occupational injuries you get in computer repair.

0:09:27 > 0:09:30Are you insured? Not enough.

0:09:30 > 0:09:33I needed the stunt man policy, but I couldn't afford the premiums.

0:09:33 > 0:09:37I can't afford to lose contracts it took me eight years to win, so...

0:09:37 > 0:09:41If you're thinking of suing, I've been advised... I just need my stuff.

0:09:41 > 0:09:45To go back to work. And the 85 quid you owe me'd be nice.

0:09:45 > 0:09:50You turned up a day late and you didn't even finish the job. I did, actually.

0:09:50 > 0:09:54It's still in bits. All you have to do is put the casing back on the tower.

0:09:54 > 0:09:58How do you do that? You can use a screw driver? I fixed that lock on the door!

0:09:58 > 0:10:04Sorry about the inconvenience(!) Hope there weren't too many stubborn blood stains on your woodwork.

0:10:04 > 0:10:06MOVEMENT UPSTAIRS

0:10:06 > 0:10:08Hold on, Mum! You'll slip!

0:10:08 > 0:10:09Two minutes.

0:10:14 > 0:10:19How did you get in? Can't I even have a bath in peace?

0:10:19 > 0:10:23It's OK, Mum. Give me your hand. No, I can do it on my own.

0:10:23 > 0:10:27I know you can, but I'm here now. Come on. Careful.

0:10:31 > 0:10:33Give me a second.

0:10:39 > 0:10:42If you just give me a second, I'll write you a cheque, if that's OK.

0:10:42 > 0:10:44Look, um...

0:10:44 > 0:10:50Um, while I'm here, I'll put that casing back on. If you like.

0:10:53 > 0:10:55That'd be great. Thanks.

0:11:03 > 0:11:07Can I give you a hand? Er...

0:11:07 > 0:11:09Yeah, I'm struggling a bit.

0:11:11 > 0:11:16If you could, er, if you could just hold this, I'll screw it in.

0:11:16 > 0:11:18What's going on?

0:11:18 > 0:11:20Er...this is John.

0:11:20 > 0:11:24Don't mind me. I'm getting a bath. You've just had one, Mum.

0:11:24 > 0:11:29I know, I was being polite. ..She hasn't been the same since Kevin ran off with the dentist.

0:11:29 > 0:11:33She could do with a good seeing to, but keep the noise down!

0:11:33 > 0:11:35THEY LAUGH

0:11:35 > 0:11:39Oh, sorry! I told you, my nan was the same.

0:11:40 > 0:11:45There we go. Oh, it's working! Do you mind if I just check my emails?

0:11:45 > 0:11:48No, um, I need to take a couple of painkillers.

0:11:48 > 0:11:52Can you spare us a glass of water? Yeah, sure.

0:11:56 > 0:12:01Well, how is he? You don't want me to bore you again, you're already running late.

0:12:01 > 0:12:04Yes, I do, you know. Isn't he the reason I ended up like this?

0:12:04 > 0:12:08I should never have left her alone with a stranger in the house.

0:12:08 > 0:12:11But where he was, internet cafes were hard to find.

0:12:11 > 0:12:15He was only online for an hour and my sister had a hairdresser's appointment.

0:12:15 > 0:12:19When he was in America, keeping in touch wasn't a problem. But now...

0:12:19 > 0:12:24And Diagnosis Murder was on. Dick Van Dyke usually has Mum pinned to her chair.

0:12:24 > 0:12:27Just tell me he hasn't been kidnapped or forced into being a drugs mule.

0:12:27 > 0:12:31No, he's moved on. At last!

0:12:31 > 0:12:33Where is he now?

0:12:33 > 0:12:36Peru. Well, that's better, isn't it?

0:12:36 > 0:12:38The land of Paddington Bear.

0:12:38 > 0:12:41And Shining Path terrorists. HE LAUGHS

0:12:41 > 0:12:44He's sailing down the Amazon to a place called Iquitos,

0:12:44 > 0:12:48the largest city in the world with no road link. There it is.

0:12:48 > 0:12:51You must think I'm some kind of obsessive lunatic with all this.

0:12:51 > 0:12:56I only use it to talk my mum through where he is. She misses him more than I do.

0:12:56 > 0:13:00I worry about my kids and they're only in Wigan. How many have you got? I've got two.

0:13:00 > 0:13:04I'm very lucky, she lets me see them every Saturday afternoon and Boxing Day.

0:13:04 > 0:13:10Yeah, can I have a taxi to 4... Inglemere ..Inglemere Road, please?

0:13:10 > 0:13:13It's Kirkby. Yep, cheers.

0:13:13 > 0:13:18Although they're getting to the age now where they don't particularly want to see me.

0:13:18 > 0:13:21If I could just send my wallet along, they'd be happy.

0:13:23 > 0:13:26You're getting a taxi all the way to Kirkby?

0:13:27 > 0:13:31Well, it's a regular contract, I can't afford to lose it.

0:13:32 > 0:13:35Where are we going? Kirkby Industrial Estate.

0:13:35 > 0:13:37It's not what I call a day out.

0:13:47 > 0:13:51Hiya. This is Anne, my assistant.

0:13:51 > 0:13:53Bella, the apprentice.

0:13:58 > 0:14:01I fell into Fords straight out of school.

0:14:01 > 0:14:03Got bored. Got divorced.

0:14:03 > 0:14:06Redundancy came along and I snatched their hands off.

0:14:06 > 0:14:10Spent half of it on a holiday in Australia.

0:14:10 > 0:14:14Wasted the rest re-training. What about you?

0:14:15 > 0:14:18I used to work in a bank.

0:14:18 > 0:14:22That was before... Well...you know...

0:14:31 > 0:14:32Nearly there.

0:14:36 > 0:14:38Mum, try this one here.

0:14:49 > 0:14:52Do you want to come in for a coffee or something?

0:14:52 > 0:14:54Oh, no, we'd better be getting back.

0:14:58 > 0:15:01Shall I call you a cab? Oh, no. It's only ten minutes away.

0:15:01 > 0:15:05And I can pick up some bits on the way home and...

0:15:05 > 0:15:07(I like to keep her active.)

0:15:07 > 0:15:11It's you needs the exercise. She's let herself go, hasn't she, Kevin?

0:15:11 > 0:15:14This isn't Kevin, Mum. It's John.

0:15:14 > 0:15:18Sorry, John. Didn't recognise you from the back.

0:15:23 > 0:15:25Come on. Who is he?

0:15:25 > 0:15:27No-one.

0:15:30 > 0:15:35Anne? Yeah? Before you go, um...

0:15:35 > 0:15:39Thanks. You're welcome.

0:15:39 > 0:15:41Look, let's be honest. I could be dead.

0:15:41 > 0:15:45I could've pressed charges, I could sue for loss of earnings.

0:15:45 > 0:15:47But we've been through this! You owe me one.

0:15:47 > 0:15:51You were as much to blame as I was. You owe me one and, um...

0:15:51 > 0:15:56Well, it's probably going to be a while before I can drive again.

0:15:56 > 0:16:03No. No way. You don't owe him anything. And besides, this place is literally a building site.

0:16:03 > 0:16:07You've been there for nine months, it can't be that bad. She wouldn't be safe here!

0:16:07 > 0:16:09You could come here. Can't you ask Kevin?

0:16:09 > 0:16:13He works. And it's not his mother. It's the mother of his son's mother!

0:16:14 > 0:16:17Two afternoons and a morning.

0:16:17 > 0:16:20This is a big mistake. It's an admission of guilt.

0:16:20 > 0:16:23I do feel guilty and I want to help the man.

0:16:23 > 0:16:26It's not very often I ask for help. Someone's got a short memory!

0:16:26 > 0:16:29OK, twice in a week. But before then?

0:16:29 > 0:16:34Twice in a week and two afternoons and a morning next week?! I do have a life! You've also got a mother.

0:16:36 > 0:16:38SHE HANGS UP

0:16:39 > 0:16:43I really appreciate this. If you fancied him, why didn't you just say?

0:16:43 > 0:16:46I don't fancy him, I just need to look professional.

0:16:46 > 0:16:51I'd never leave her with a complete stranger, not in a million years, but he was so nice...

0:16:51 > 0:16:55Oh, aye? ..and could see how much I needed to speak to Chris.

0:16:55 > 0:16:57I didn't have time to get Mum ready to take her with me.

0:16:57 > 0:17:02I thought, if I let him do this one favour for me, when I get back, I can offer to make it up to him.

0:17:02 > 0:17:06You dirty mare! Take him out for a drink, I mean!

0:17:06 > 0:17:09Lynne! I thought I heard your voice!

0:17:09 > 0:17:13Have you heard this, Mum? Our Anne's got herself a new fella.

0:17:13 > 0:17:15Who's that? The one you tried to kill.

0:17:15 > 0:17:18Pete Price? Take no notice, Mum.

0:17:22 > 0:17:25This is lovely. All of us together.

0:17:25 > 0:17:29Give Chris a shout. He's travelling around the world, Mum. Remember?

0:17:29 > 0:17:31Where is he now? Peru. I got an email yesterday.

0:17:31 > 0:17:36Oh, our Kirsty's just landed the lead role in the school play! She is chuffed to little bits!

0:17:36 > 0:17:41I think she gets her love of theatre off me. Remember my Cinderella, Mum? We've still got the photos.

0:17:41 > 0:17:43Tell you what, I'll get the albums out.

0:17:43 > 0:17:49You two can take a trip down memory lane, while I slip out for a couple of hours.

0:17:49 > 0:17:50That'll be nice.

0:18:04 > 0:18:07Three days and this'll be good as new.

0:18:07 > 0:18:10Do you ever check the files for anything dodgy?

0:18:10 > 0:18:12You think he was dodgy?

0:18:12 > 0:18:14I feel like a snatch squad from social services.

0:18:14 > 0:18:17MOBILE PHONE RINGS

0:18:22 > 0:18:23Yes?

0:18:28 > 0:18:32She found the bucket of change, accused me of stealing her money.

0:18:32 > 0:18:34One thing led to another, I stepped out for time out,

0:18:34 > 0:18:39I wouldn't have been responsible for my actions otherwise. Next thing...

0:18:39 > 0:18:44She was screaming for you, literally screaming. I told her a million times she was busy.

0:18:44 > 0:18:47I should've left you a key. Why d'you put up with it?

0:18:47 > 0:18:51She should be in a home. ..Don't you think she should be in a home? She is.

0:18:55 > 0:18:57All right, Mum? Ssh!

0:18:59 > 0:19:01That looks heavy.

0:19:02 > 0:19:05Shall I put it in your room where it belongs?

0:19:05 > 0:19:07I'm watching this! Sorry.

0:19:07 > 0:19:09She wasn't like this before. No, I know.

0:19:09 > 0:19:13This isn't going to work, is it? I can make other arrangements.

0:19:13 > 0:19:15Yeah, I think that might be best.

0:19:46 > 0:19:49Hello, Ricky! Thanks so much for doing this.

0:19:49 > 0:19:52It's me - Ricky. You know, your Lynne's hubby.

0:19:52 > 0:19:56And the other one. That's it.

0:19:56 > 0:19:59I've got your bag. You have a lovely time.

0:20:01 > 0:20:02She'll be fine.

0:20:44 > 0:20:49ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS 'Anne, it's Lynne.

0:20:50 > 0:20:55'I'm really, really sorry, but she just doesn't want to be here.

0:20:55 > 0:20:57'She thinks we've kidnapped her.

0:20:59 > 0:21:03'She locked herself in the en-suite and Ricky had to literally break the door down.

0:21:03 > 0:21:04'A brand-new door.

0:21:07 > 0:21:10'She was sat there crying, Anne.

0:21:10 > 0:21:12'It was heartbreaking.

0:21:13 > 0:21:17'She was in tears, because she didn't know where she was...

0:21:17 > 0:21:20'and she couldn't get the bidet to flush.'

0:21:25 > 0:21:27'I don't know. Maybe if you have a word with her,

0:21:27 > 0:21:31'you can persuade her to stay, but...I seriously doubt it.'

0:21:35 > 0:21:37Bring her home.

0:21:59 > 0:22:04More wine? I've got the car.

0:22:04 > 0:22:06Don't encourage him to drink and drive.

0:22:06 > 0:22:09Do you want dead children on your conscience? I can walk.

0:22:09 > 0:22:12Or you can stay.

0:22:12 > 0:22:15You've only known him two minutes.

0:22:15 > 0:22:19Three months I've known him and I think it's about time he stayed the night.

0:22:19 > 0:22:23While you're under your father's roof, you'll live by his rules.

0:22:23 > 0:22:25Dad's dead.

0:22:25 > 0:22:28Oh...no!

0:22:28 > 0:22:31SHE SOBS

0:22:34 > 0:22:37I'm sorry, but I tell you that two or three times a week.

0:22:41 > 0:22:44I just get a bit bored sometimes.

0:22:46 > 0:22:48When he was dying, I promised him I'd look after you.

0:22:48 > 0:22:53He wanted you to get out there, Mum, and flourish. To live.

0:22:53 > 0:22:56But the only time we ever escape these four walls is to go to Tesco.

0:22:56 > 0:22:59My only son has gone to Rio for Mardi Gras,

0:22:59 > 0:23:01and I haven't had sex this century!

0:23:08 > 0:23:12I know I forget things,

0:23:12 > 0:23:14but I'm not stupid.

0:23:14 > 0:23:17And this isn't a conversation for the dinner table.

0:23:28 > 0:23:31It's not easy for you, I know, but...

0:23:33 > 0:23:36..there was a bitterness earlier.

0:23:36 > 0:23:38An anger I haven't seen before.

0:23:38 > 0:23:41Sorry if it bothered you.

0:23:41 > 0:23:45Funny you waited until now to mention it.

0:23:45 > 0:23:47It's been a while for me as well, you know.

0:23:50 > 0:23:52You think that was anger?

0:23:52 > 0:23:56The day she threw you down the stairs, I really lost it.

0:23:56 > 0:23:59What did you do?

0:23:59 > 0:24:01I threw a pair of tweezers at her.

0:24:03 > 0:24:06A pair of tweezers? It's all I had to hand.

0:24:06 > 0:24:10But suppose I'd been carving meat or something at the time?

0:24:10 > 0:24:12It's not funny.

0:24:12 > 0:24:16In that split second, I wanted to do to her what she did to you.

0:24:18 > 0:24:21Maybe Lynne's right.

0:24:21 > 0:24:24If you're getting to the end of your tether,

0:24:24 > 0:24:27maybe it's time to start thinking of somewhere to put her.

0:24:29 > 0:24:31She's not an item of furniture.

0:24:37 > 0:24:38Ooh, er...

0:24:38 > 0:24:41Anne! Your mum's up!

0:24:41 > 0:24:45Hello, Mum. This is John. He stayed the night last night.

0:24:45 > 0:24:49We all had a meal together, remember? Did you have a nice time?

0:24:49 > 0:24:51Very much so, yes.

0:24:51 > 0:24:55Party like it was 1999. SHE LAUGHS

0:24:55 > 0:24:58THEY LAUGH

0:25:10 > 0:25:15These are the Iguazu Falls. They're on the border between Argentina and Brazil.

0:25:15 > 0:25:20Chris says they're officially on the shortlist to be one of the new seven wonders of the world.

0:25:20 > 0:25:24But he's never been to Dyserth. Between Rhyl and Prestatyn.

0:25:24 > 0:25:28The story goes a God fell in love with a woman,

0:25:28 > 0:25:31but she ran off with another man in a canoe. Ooh, she paddled off.

0:25:31 > 0:25:34She did a paddler,

0:25:34 > 0:25:37the Gods got angry, lashed out,

0:25:37 > 0:25:38and created that.

0:25:40 > 0:25:43And the lovers are condemned to be falling forever.

0:25:47 > 0:25:50Have you told him about us yet?

0:25:51 > 0:25:55When he gets to Buenos Aires, he's promised to Skype me. I'll do it then.

0:26:05 > 0:26:08MOBILE PHONE RINGS

0:26:10 > 0:26:12Did he call? Have we got his blessing?

0:26:12 > 0:26:14'He's been mugged!'

0:26:18 > 0:26:21SHE CRIES Oh, it's going to be all right.

0:26:21 > 0:26:24They got his passport, his wallet. Everything.

0:26:24 > 0:26:26But he's OK. That's the main thing.

0:26:26 > 0:26:29No, no. He's not OK! He's on the other side of the world.

0:26:32 > 0:26:34It happened last week. Ten days ago!

0:26:34 > 0:26:38He's been to the embassy. They're already sorting a new passport.

0:26:38 > 0:26:43There you go! He could've been dead and I'd have been boiling eggs! You sure you don't want anything?

0:26:43 > 0:26:48No. I need to get back. From the day they step out on their own, you've got them dead in a ditch.

0:26:48 > 0:26:53I know how she feels. I'll never forget losing Jodie at Center Parcs. Longest five minutes of my life!

0:26:53 > 0:26:57I went cold. A total nightmare. Literally. I've never got over it.

0:26:57 > 0:27:01You set curfews... I still wake up in the night! ..you give them boundaries.

0:27:01 > 0:27:06Every time they're late, or not where they say they'll be, you have them dead in a ditch.

0:27:06 > 0:27:08But not for ten days!

0:27:08 > 0:27:11Not like some kind of orphan who doesn't belong to anyone.

0:27:11 > 0:27:16If something really serious had happened, someone would've been in touch. I said that.

0:27:16 > 0:27:20When he was a boy, I'd worry if I couldn't see him in the street.

0:27:20 > 0:27:24They grow up and you lie awake at night till they get back from town.

0:27:24 > 0:27:29I cried for a month when he went to university. Now he's getting mugged in countries we've been at war with!

0:27:29 > 0:27:34He's swimming with sharks and he's climbing volcanoes and he's bungee jumping

0:27:34 > 0:27:40and disappearing on treks through the jungle to places they actually seriously call The Lost City.

0:27:40 > 0:27:46Look! Look at it! It's like something out of Indiana Jones! I shouldn't have to put up with that.

0:27:46 > 0:27:49Just being selfish. Kids, they never think.

0:27:49 > 0:27:54He's a full-grown man and can cope with anything. You should be proud, because that's how you made him.

0:27:54 > 0:27:58How can I feel proud when I feel so scared? I miss him, John.

0:27:58 > 0:28:04I want him to come home, and whoever says, if you love someone set them free, they never had children.

0:28:04 > 0:28:08Mum! Tea's ready. Maybe this'll be a wake-up call. He's done South America now.

0:28:08 > 0:28:13Once he gets his passport, I wouldn't be surprised if he's on the next plane back to England.

0:28:13 > 0:28:17Except he's already applied for his Australian visa. Who has? Chris.

0:28:17 > 0:28:22Do you know how long it lasts? I don't care. I don't agree with credit cards.

0:28:22 > 0:28:28A year. He's going to get a job. He's been in touch with an agency.

0:28:28 > 0:28:31He's going to stay in Australia for a year, save up, then carry on.

0:28:31 > 0:28:36Indonesia, Malaya, Vietnam... He's not coming back.

0:28:36 > 0:28:40He doesn't want to be here any more. I don't blame him. Bloody weather.

0:28:52 > 0:28:55'I miss him, John. I want him to come home.'

0:29:07 > 0:29:10Are you serious?

0:29:10 > 0:29:12Yeah! Why not? It's only Australia.

0:29:12 > 0:29:14Do you want to come with me?

0:29:14 > 0:29:18I've met your kids. You should meet mine. Can you afford it?!

0:29:18 > 0:29:21No. Can you afford to take the time off?

0:29:21 > 0:29:24Not really. And who'd look after your mum?

0:29:30 > 0:29:34Three weeks? It's hardly worth going for anything less.

0:29:34 > 0:29:40I know it seems like a long time, but I did 52 weeks last year and 52

0:29:40 > 0:29:42the year before... I'm just thinking of Mum.

0:29:42 > 0:29:46You know what she was like last time she stayed with us. She didn't stay.

0:29:46 > 0:29:48Well, exactly.

0:29:50 > 0:29:54It might be easier if you moved in with her.

0:29:54 > 0:29:58Anne, I have a family. A husband and two kids to look after.

0:30:01 > 0:30:06Don't get me wrong. I'd love to. I'm just being realistic.

0:30:06 > 0:30:09Have you thought about... What's it called? ..respite care?

0:30:09 > 0:30:13There must be homes with staff that cater for this sort of thing.

0:30:13 > 0:30:16I can't afford it. Not on top of the flights and everything.

0:30:16 > 0:30:20Couldn't you get a grant? I pay enough council tax. I'm not sure she'd be happy

0:30:20 > 0:30:23in a place like that.

0:30:24 > 0:30:27But I'll look into it. I just thought I'd ask you first.

0:30:29 > 0:30:33Obviously, if all else fails, I'm happy to help.

0:30:33 > 0:30:35But you could treat a care home as a trial run.

0:30:35 > 0:30:40See if she settles. It might be the best solution for everyone.

0:30:40 > 0:30:42I mean, you are a saint, but one of a kind.

0:30:42 > 0:30:47It can't have been easy for Chris coming back from university. He loves his nan. Don't worry.

0:30:47 > 0:30:52And then there's John. You can't expect him to take Mum on full time.

0:30:52 > 0:30:56If you ever wanted him to move in, you'd have to think about her moving out.

0:31:38 > 0:31:41Two or three weeks after my first was born,

0:31:41 > 0:31:46my wife went for a night out with the girls.

0:31:46 > 0:31:49Can't remember the occasion, but she had to stay over.

0:31:49 > 0:31:54Anyway, she'd expressed some milk for me, and I had some of the powdered stuff,

0:31:54 > 0:31:57and it was the first time I'd been left alone with my new son.

0:31:57 > 0:32:00You really have to cherish those moments, don't you?

0:32:03 > 0:32:09It was the longest night of my life. I couldn't get him to take a bottle.

0:32:09 > 0:32:12I couldn't get him to sleep, couldn't put him down.

0:32:12 > 0:32:18He lay in my arms and the pair of us cried until the morning.

0:32:18 > 0:32:19I couldn't cope, Lynne.

0:32:19 > 0:32:23Ever since that night, I've known how someone can shake a baby.

0:32:23 > 0:32:26Ricky had Jodie for a weekend and she was a difficult child...

0:32:26 > 0:32:30Will you shut up and let me make my point? Sorry, I thought you had.

0:32:30 > 0:32:34The point is...the morning came.

0:32:34 > 0:32:36We got through it.

0:32:36 > 0:32:41Dawn broke, birds sang, and it was never as bad again.

0:32:41 > 0:32:43I could've phoned my wife or my mum...

0:32:43 > 0:32:46Or shook your baby till he was dead or disabled.

0:32:46 > 0:32:49There's no shame in asking for help. She's asking now!

0:32:49 > 0:32:50And I want to help!

0:32:50 > 0:32:54But not for three weeks. Long term.

0:32:54 > 0:32:58All I'm saying is, it might be difficult at the start... I know what you're saying.

0:32:58 > 0:33:01But it's not dawn coming, it's night.

0:33:02 > 0:33:07It's going to get harder. And because I've got some perspective,

0:33:07 > 0:33:11I can see that what Anne needs is professional support.

0:33:11 > 0:33:13But the problem is, she can't let go.

0:33:13 > 0:33:17She's lost Chris, so she's clinging on to Mum.

0:33:17 > 0:33:20It's classic empty nest syndrome.

0:33:21 > 0:33:25You like her, don't you? Yeah.

0:33:25 > 0:33:28So, unless you find martyrdom sexy or something,

0:33:28 > 0:33:33you're not going to like her any less if she unburdens herself of my mother, are you?

0:33:34 > 0:33:38So, tell her. Tell her to treat this break as a trial run.

0:33:38 > 0:33:43Tell her she doesn't have to worry about an empty nest any more.

0:34:51 > 0:34:54When Chris is your age, would you want him

0:34:54 > 0:34:57stuck looking after you the way you look after your mum?

0:34:59 > 0:35:00Yes or no?

0:35:08 > 0:35:10Other cultures do it.

0:35:24 > 0:35:25All right, Mum.

0:35:28 > 0:35:29There you are.

0:35:29 > 0:35:31That's it.

0:35:33 > 0:35:35SHE SIGHS

0:35:53 > 0:35:57Hiya, Nan. It's John. Your grandson. How are you?

0:35:59 > 0:36:02I've brought some friends to see you.

0:36:02 > 0:36:09This is my friend Anne. Hello. And this is her mum Bella.

0:36:27 > 0:36:30ALARM BLARES

0:36:30 > 0:36:32Mum!

0:36:34 > 0:36:36It's that one. I'm sorry.

0:36:36 > 0:36:40Dump me in there and never come back. That's the plan, isn't it?

0:36:41 > 0:36:44Come on. Come on.

0:37:01 > 0:37:04I asked him not to say anything.

0:37:04 > 0:37:07Trouble is, he knows you. He knows what you're like.

0:37:07 > 0:37:12I hate going behind your back, but he needed to know you're missing him and what he's putting you through.

0:37:12 > 0:37:16The important thing is he's coming home for Christmas! No!

0:37:16 > 0:37:20He's not! You've no right to interfere with his plans! Lucky I didn't do it to be thanked.

0:37:20 > 0:37:24No, you did it for an easy life, but he's staying where he is.

0:37:24 > 0:37:26I'm going to see him. You're looking after Mum!

0:37:26 > 0:37:30That's not possible. The flights are paid for! We leave tomorrow morning!

0:37:30 > 0:37:35But that's madness, especially if he's... I'm catching the 11:22 to Manchester Airport.

0:37:35 > 0:37:39I expect you to be at ours by half ten at the latest. I can't. I'm sorry!

0:37:39 > 0:37:43If you're not there, I'll drop Mum off on the way to the station. There won't be anybody in.

0:37:43 > 0:37:47She'll be waiting for you! Ricky's working and I've got a smear test. Here we go!

0:37:47 > 0:37:50It happens to be true, as a matter of fact!

0:37:50 > 0:37:52It's just routine, but even so.

0:37:52 > 0:37:56Then rearrange it, or get Ricky to take the day off work.

0:37:56 > 0:38:00I haven't got time to argue with you, I've got packing to do.

0:38:04 > 0:38:07MOBILE PHONE RINGS

0:38:15 > 0:38:18TELEPHONE RINGS

0:38:19 > 0:38:21Anne?

0:38:21 > 0:38:24(She's not there. She is.)

0:38:24 > 0:38:26Anne?

0:38:26 > 0:38:29Pick up the phone.

0:38:29 > 0:38:30I know you're there.

0:38:31 > 0:38:35Look... we don't begrudge you a break.

0:38:35 > 0:38:37Far from it. But if you're going

0:38:37 > 0:38:41'to emotionally blackmail us, a bit more notice would be nice.

0:38:41 > 0:38:45'We've talked it through, and we just don't feel

0:38:45 > 0:38:49'we're equipped to look after your mum for three whole weeks.

0:38:49 > 0:38:51'So, if you leave her with us,

0:38:51 > 0:38:55'we'll have no option but to look for a care home for her. Sorry.

0:38:55 > 0:38:57'We'll pay for it, of course.'

0:38:57 > 0:39:00She's your responsibility now. Do what you want.

0:39:00 > 0:39:05Lumber us with her, she goes in a home. When you get back, she won't remember anywhere else.

0:39:05 > 0:39:10You underestimate Mum and exaggerate her illness, cos it suits you! She'll be settled and happy.

0:39:10 > 0:39:15You'll have an empty house, he'll move in, you'll thank us and be grateful, you sanctimonious cow!

0:39:27 > 0:39:31The taxi's here. Lynne isn't. She's not answering her phone.

0:39:31 > 0:39:35I'm going to take Mum round to her house. I'll meet you at the station.

0:39:35 > 0:39:39What if there's no-one in? You can't just leave her.

0:39:39 > 0:39:42That's what Lynne's banking on. She's not winning this time.

0:40:09 > 0:40:15Bring her here, leave her with me. I'll stay behind. You can't do that.

0:40:15 > 0:40:19Put a couple of mattresses at the bottom of the stairs, it'll be fine.

0:40:19 > 0:40:21We'll wave you off together.

0:40:22 > 0:40:25This is stupid.

0:40:25 > 0:40:29It's disrupting too many people's lives.

0:40:29 > 0:40:32And Chris could be here for Christmas.

0:40:48 > 0:40:51To the station, love? No.

0:40:51 > 0:40:53Inglemere Road.

0:40:55 > 0:40:57Home.

0:40:58 > 0:40:59Go.

0:40:59 > 0:41:02Go on, love, go.

0:41:07 > 0:41:10I know exactly what I'm saying.

0:41:10 > 0:41:11You can go.

0:41:13 > 0:41:16Just promise me you'll come back.

0:43:06 > 0:43:09Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:43:09 > 0:43:12E-mail: subtitling@bbc.co.uk